HUMANIZING LIFE AS WE AGE

What our parents want as they age (and what we want too)

Most of us will be, or already are, caregivers to older loved ones. Over half of Canadians, at some point, will provide unpaid care to a family member or friend. In a country where our population of older adults will grow to nearly 10 million by 2030, aging care is an issue most of us will encounter.

Here are three concepts to consider as you navigate caregiving. These aren’t the regular tips that you may find if you google "family and friend caregivers”. These are ideas that will hopefully shift your perspective of aging and help you better understand what’s most important to the older adults you love. Hint: It’s the same things we want for ourselves – now and as we get older.

Aging is social

We are all aging. It is the one social condition that we all experience – if we are fortunate. If we consider aging in this way, we understand that enabling social care is equally as important to accessing health care as we get older.

Our entire system of aging care has been born out of institutionalized care. We have clinicized aging when aging is not a medical condition. Certainly, there are conditions like dementia, diabetes, and heart disease that may become more prevalent as we age, but they do not require aging care in and of themselves.

Aging should be treated socially. This means remaining connected to family, friends and community is priority number one. Ensuring continued access to transportation to get to and from the activities you enjoy, modifying your home to accommodate decreased eyesight, hearing or mobility, and finding ways to connect with people daily are of highest importance.

Older Adults are Adults

Most of us know that the term “seniors” is not politically correct these days. It was replaced in re-cent years by the term “older adults”. The aging care sector adopted this naming convention and it permeating public norms.

Many “seniors” themselves don’t care much about this distinction, but it’s interesting to pause and consider what the change represents. The terminology aims to value lived experience and the wisdom gained over the years.

However, the truth is the terminology is temporary – or at least I hope it is. The key word is “adults”. When we drop the “older” we realize that there isn’t a difference between how we should treat one another whether we are 35 or 75. In both cases, we want to be treated with respect and dignity and be empowered to make our own decisions.

Freedom in decision-making is key. Ensuring easy access to the information and resources re-quired to make choices over your own life is key. This most often is reflected in the desire to re-main in your own home. I know that is where I want to live for as long as possible. If you focus on social care, you have a greater chance of aging in place.

Life is a Circle

I don’t believe aging is a return to childhood – a notion contrary to the point about adulthood that I have already made. However, I do believe that older adults and children should be together, as much and as often as possible.

In simple terms, children need to play and learn. Tweens want to fit in. Teens are seeking independence. In each case older adults can be great companions; in fact they often have the same needs.

Look for any opportunity to connect the generations. This is where you will find purpose and joy and ultimately where our youth will develop the empathy required to humanize life as we age.

About the Author

Aimée Foreman is the Founder & CEO of Silvermark; an advisory firm in the silver economy. She is committed to bringing equity to aging through her writing, speaking, and design strategy by placing older adults at the heart of decision-making. She is a mom of two. silvermark.ca