The Echo Week 15

ISSUE 1415 | MAR 01, 2019

THE

ECHO

FREE WEEKLY GUIDE TO VAL D’ISERE

M A G A Z I N E

CHARITY ECHO SHIRTS

SPROG SEASON ROUND 4

PRAISING SKISUS

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COVER ART

By Thomas Gabet Interview: Page 10

PROUDLY PRESENTED BY THE FOLIE DOUCE ART PROJECT Each week, the front cover of The Echo is going to be a different artwork produced by mostly local artists, but also several from further afield. This project is being very generously supported by La Folie Douce, whose contribution is allowing the artists to be paid ahead of time for their work, as both Folie and The Echo firmly believe in paying people for their skills.

If you’re interested in drawing/painting/ collaging/ creating something in whatever medium takes your fancy, please get in touch by emailing contact@valecho.co.uk and we can discuss. Equally, if you’re interested in writing for the magazine or have ideas for a feature, drop us a line.

At the end of the season, the plan is to

We want to encourage a community of creators and give people a space to use their talents, even if whilst out here, many are taking a break from “regular life”.

Prints of the artwork are available to purchase on The Echo website, www. valecho.co.uk/shop, with profits going to the artists.

hold an exhibition of all The Echo covers from the winter, and again Folie Douce is supporting this endeavour, as it fits with their creative vision.

We can’t wait to see what the artists come up with each week and look forward to talking to them about their work and life in or out of the mountains.

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SNOWBERRY PREMIUM SKI HIRE VALDISERE 2019

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CONT ENTS

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Echo Publications CCK Intergalactic Ltd

www.valecho.co.uk contact@valecho.co.uk Please recycle the magazine once you have read it. Or, better still, hand it on to someone else.

Contributors: Sam Box, Ben Pryor, Caitlin Kennedy, Al and Abi Nasmyth

06 RESORT GUIDE

36 PRAISING SKISUS After seeing how the punters carry their skis, we think they may have worked out how to summon the snow.

38 EVENT GUIDE What’s on this week: - Town events - Bar nights - Sporting competitions

40 SPROG SEASON ROUND 4 Al and Abi Nasmyth update us on the hilarious ups and downs of season life with a tiny person in tow

The down-low on everything from the best restaurants to the numbers to call in an emergency

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SPOTLIGHT ON THE ARTIST

p o w e r e d

Tesla Model X

b y

snowdrone

|

Private & Shared info@europetransfer.com +44 203 239 4978

VW Caravelle

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Audi A6 allroad

We chat to Thomas Gabet, the designer of this week’s cover art.

The Echo’s cover is generously sponsored by La Folie Douce

16 OUT OF THE BUBBLE A satirical spin on the week’s events from further afield than the Espace Killy

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LEGENDS OF VAL

A deadly serious interview with our Seasonaire of the Week. This week, Olly Brown takes to the limelight.

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SPOTLIGHT ON THE ARTIST Artist: Thomas Gabet

What kind of photography do you do? 10 For the moment, it’s nothing crazy, just portraits of friends, pictures of landscapes.

But then I also like to capture something more figurative, more abstract photos. I love the abstract world. Similar to the mask and spirits, I like to find things that we don’t see every day.

And I suppose photography’s in your blood, being the son of Hugo of “Hugo Photo”.

Yes, it’s in my family for sure.

Tell us about your cover.

So my first thought when I was asked to do a cover was to just see what inspiration comes from the mountains. The result was more a feeling than a visual representation of them. I like doing things with masks in my art because they bring to mind spirits.

They both involve hidden things, things that you don’t see in real life. In my drawing, the spirit of the mountains is blue, which gives a feeling of danger but also beauty.

And when you were studying art in Annecy, what did you focus on?

The course was really broad and we did a lot of model making, work with plastic, graphic design and painting as well. But I really found myself drawn to working with plastic.

And is Annecy a good place to be for the arts?

Yes it’s fantastic, very cultural. Not quite in the same way as a big city like Lyon or Paris, but there’s still a lot going on. Cinema is great there and they have an animation festival, which is very highly regarded.

When you lived in Val d’Isère before, did you struggle with the lack of culture and art at all?

Yes a little, but when you’re in the mountains, you don’t necessarily look for culture, because you’re not going to find it really. You search instead for inspiration from the natural landscape, the air which is so much easier to breathe, the sky full of stars at night. It’s a magnificent village that will always remain close to my heart and continues to inspire me.

And as a Val d’Isère boy, here comes the all important question; do you like Génépi?

Of course! I love Génépi; you can’t live in Val d’Isère and not love it.

And where’s your favourite watering hole for a spot of genepi?

I really love Next Bar- it’s definitely my favourite French bar. And for English bars, it’s got to be Blue Note- the vibe is super chilled and they do great genepi.

And finally, what have you been listening to whilst riding recently?

I love electric guitar so you’ll often find me listening to Jimmi Hendrix on the slopes.

Nice! Thanks Thomas.

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PLANKS PHOTO

COMPETITION

Each week the winner of the Planks Photo Competition wins themselves a Planks beanie from the flagship store in town.

Prize must be collected within a week of winning.

This week’s winner: Horace Hansen Enter at www.valecho.co.uk/competitions

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OUT OF THE BUBBLE

onto the heads of those going for the former.

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Why he’d be in a rush to get home with his former lawyer Michael Cohen testifying to

Congress is anyone’s guess. Accusations

By Ben Pryor ranged from the Donald inflating his wealth to try and buy an NFL team, The Donald met Kim Wrong-Un for a second summit, in Hanoi this time. Progress deflating it for the tax man and a copy of was expected on denuclearisation but talks the cheque said to be reimbursement for hush money paid to Stormy Daniels on the broke down after the North Korean leader eve of his election. At the time, people requested all sanctions be lifted, at which point the Donald departed, thus becoming questioned whether he was qualified to be US President; Cohen labelled him ‘a the latest in a long list of Americans racist, a cheat and a conman’; like Sir to leave Vietnam early without having Talbot Buxomly in Blackadder, sounds a bit accomplished his goal. A Hanoi barber overqualified. offered free haircuts to anyone wanting the same hairstyle as the Donald or Kim Wrong-Un; his plan was presumably to dye The second meaningful Brexit vote has been set for the 12th March, with a vote the offcuts from those opting for the latter on no deal the following day and a vote golden shower yellow before gluing them

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on extending Article 50 on the 14th.

The day after that is the Ides of March, of which political leaders have been falling foul since 44 BC, but Theresa gonebyMarch doesn’t have the same ring to it and the opposition are busy shedding MPs into the ‘Chuka Umunna and friends’ party and fighting the increasing weight of evidence that, to paraphrase their strapline, they’re ‘for the many, not the Jew’. Until then we’ll wait for Geoffrey Cox to get back from Brussels and show us his codicil.

a maximum sentence of three years; no chance of Batman relocating from Gotham then. A Merseyside shooting range has been criticised for printing targets with the face of IS bride Shamima Begum.

They also offer Margaret Thatcher, Osama bin Laden, Hitler, the Donald and Justin Bieber; decisions, decisions. A man with a micropenis is suing his wife for telling everyone, saying it’s only a matter of time before someone leaks his name; or testifies to Congress.

A Texan man who finished last in his fantasy football league had to run round a dog park covered from head to toe in peanut butter; nutty. A Louisiana man who broke into a house dressed as a gorilla and hid under the bed was charged with resisting arrest, unauthorised entry, meth possession and wearing a mask, the last one carrying

And finally, an Ohio man sentenced to 47 years in prison reacted by punching his lawyer. Couple of extra years on a sentence that’s nudging half a century already; not really seeing the downside. Until next week, I’m off watch the André Previn Morecambe and Wise sketch… as should you.

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LEGENDS OF VAL Oliver Brown

How many seasons are you on?

Five now!

How is your pull game?

I am 27 years old and my pull game has hit rock bottom. It’s bad.

20 Craziest thing you have seen in Val? On my first season in Val, I walked in on my executive chef having relations with a host from another company…on the freezer. It will live with me forever.

Anyone in your company take your fancy?

You know what, I live next door to Graham, we call him Grandad. He has long hair and a stubbly beard; now he is a good looking man.

Favourite person in resort?

Robbie Outram. I have two of his mates staying in my apartment at the moment because he is just so nice. Last night, one of these chaps was lying in bed and asked me why I hadn’t eaten a jar of jam I have had all season. I said “I’ll eat my jam when I want to eat my jam.” He said “Ok…sorry.”

I said “NO. I will eat my jam when I want to eat my jam.” So I opened the lid, took out a huge handful and smeared it all over his face. But yeah, I have never met someone I have liked enough after three months to put up their mates. 100% Robbie Outram.

Biggest wipeout?

What is your best chat up line?

Top of Cugnai, chalet day off, a few There is a particular girl who works at Jaegers in. I put two turns in and straight Bramble and I first saw her about two lined, hit a bump and went down. I lost months ago, having a meal with her parents both skis, both poles, both gloves, helmet, at the table next to mine. She was wearing goggles, half undid my jacket and ripped a pink top and she looked absolutely my salopettes. I thought I was dead. amazing. I saw her last night and my chat up line was “I saw you two months ago Messiest night in Val? with your parents, you were wearing a pink Last season, we had a fair few bottles of top, you looked amazing”. She wanted wine and ended up serving drinks behind to be weirded out but was apparently the bar at some place. We got the chairlift impressed that I had remembered. If she back down, drinking a bottle of Jaeger is reading, I would like her to contact The on the way. I was found later that day Echo for my phone number. Actually, that sitting on the wall by my apartment in a may be my best chat up line. blizzard with my fingers in my mouth. My hosts asked what I was doing and I had to

21 explain that I couldn’t enter the code to get in because my hands were so cold. I couldn’t even take them out of my mouth to explain.

Tell us about when you met James Blunt?

Na that story is boring but here is a good one: It was my birthday, I was drunk off my tits and went to the bar to get some drinks.

A guy at the bar asked me why I appeared to be having such a good time and I explained it was my birthday. He asked what I was drinking and bought my drinks. I looked up and it was Prince Harry.

What are your life aspirations?

We are currently suing the Nigerian Government for six and a half million dollars. When that comes in I start my new job.

Why? Why the f*ck not?

What would you like to be different about Val? Over five seasons I have learnt that you can go out, have a good time and be yourself. The one thing I wish about Val is that people on their first season could go out and not feel the need to pose or watch people or go to particular bars on particular nights. Why not go to a drum and bass night for a laugh, go and blow a tip that you didn’t deserve on one bottle of wine, go to Arctic and have a boogie bowl to be healthy this week. I think every single seasonaire would have more fun if they were more spontaneous and would just be themselves.

Any last words?

I am really struggling for a lighter at the moment.

vvv

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PRO GEAR TIPS The Great Ski and Snowboard Swindle These days, even before you book your ski holiday, you’ll be bombarded by all manner of people trying to sell you ski hire. From tour operators or the agent you’re thinking of booking through, to an online third party fronted by David Hasselhoff in a gold lamé ski jacket that is based in Bratislava of all places (where?) - they are all at it.

hundreds of Euros.

One big name tour operator was well known in the industry for selling “beginner ski hire” that didn’t include boots – leaving shocked customers to fork out up tor eighty Euros extra on arrival.

From the 160 to 200 Euros you’ll typically pay a tour operator to hire a pair of adult skis, the shop is probably paid less than 25% of that. It’s no wonder they’re so desperate to sell you ski hire vouchers!

In addition to it being false that booking through a third party gets you the best None of these third parties really have price, it’s also untrue that you’ll get the anything to do with hiring ski kit at all. best equipment: in fact it can be quite They are just middle-men taking a cut. the opposite. If the shop is being paid a They promise all sorts of things: from pittance by your agent or tour operator, the best equipment to the cheapest it stands to reason that they will keep prices, from ensuring availability in a the best kit for people booking direct busy week to saving you time by making and paying decent prices. sure everything is prepared for you on arrival. However, most of it is just pie in Agency clients invariably end up with the sky! the older equipment, in some cases six It can be hard to know if you’re being offered a bargain or not because when you book they often don’t tell you what shop you are getting your equipment from so you can’t check the price if you went direct. They also use their own names for the category of equipment so you can’t compare. Another trick is hiding the cost of the ski hire in an ‘all inclusive’ deal. Usually, tour operators or agents who sell ski hire charge much higher prices than you would pay by going direct to the shop and the difference for a family can run into

or more years old. This gear is often way past its sell-by date and even downright dangerous. It’s the equivilent to booking a hotel room through Booking.com – you’ll still be in the Hilton but in the room above the kitchen and not the sea view suite.

To conclude: it is far better to book directly with the end supplier and let David Hasselhoff go back to being a lifeguard.

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SUNDAY TOSS THE BOSS (22:00 - 12:00)

Monday (2 for 1 burgers) MAX WHITTAL (Apres) THE MARIVAUX (Evening)

tequilia Tuesday DAISY B & TOM (Apres) DORTMUND vs TOTTENHAM @ 2100 QUEENS OF THE SNOW STAGE (Evening)

Wednesday MARDY JOHNNY DEPPS (APRES) PSG vs MAN UTD @ 2100 COCO & THE BUTTERFIELDS (EVENING)

toffee ThursdayS RENNES vs ARSENAL @ 1855 CHELSEA vs DYNAMO KIEV @ 2100 The blazing strings (Evening)

fIzz FRIDAY (€20 Prosecco) lunettes (EVENING)

SATURDAY 2 FOR 1 1080’s Scotland Vs. Wales @ 1515 ENGLAND VS. ITALY @ 1745

Open 16:00 - 02:00 Food SERVED 17:00 - 22:00 The Moris Pub Val D’Isere

@themorisval

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OFF PISTE SNOW REPORT Brought to you by Henry’s Avalanche Talk www.henrysavalanchetalk.com ‘Winter’ returns with snowfall & cooler temps.

The last 3 weeks have been very warm, dry and sunny. Many wet snow avalanches have occurred in the last week in the very warm temperatures.

But we are expecting cold temperatures and considerable new snow every day next week from Monday. The whole of March looks like it will be colder with regular snowfall and some sunny breaks in between.

be like those bitterly cold temperatures of January. The situation isn’t clear, and we’ll be checking the forecasts every day for validation.

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Fresh snow is always a good thing in terms of skiing quality, and we’re very excited for the days to come. However, once there has been 20 to 25cm of new snow, we need to be careful while the snow is falling and for the next 24 to 48 hours after the snow has fallen. We’ll be keeping a careful eye on the weather forecast and avalanche bulletins as and when any fresh snow falls.

Things will become very unstable indeed if we receive 25cm + of new snow Be careful during the snowfall and for the next 24 to 48 hours after it. The more snow that falls, the bigger the size of the potential avalanche. In Henry’s words “the bigger the size of a slab avalanche, the badder it is”!

The cold temperatures will refreeze and stabilise the base of the snowpack and we can expect the new snow to become stable quite quickly. Recently the snowpack We’ve recently been enjoying all sorts of has become a lot more stable due to off-piste skiing conditions, from difficult lack of fresh snow, daytime melting and crusty snow and hard windblown snow to overnight re-freezing (particularly at lower nice ‘chalky’ grippy stuff, some cold ‘winter’ altitudes and on sun-exposed slopes), skier powder, and even smooth spring snow compaction and a bridge of compacted conditions on the sunnier slopes where the snow covering the old weak layer. That snow has started to transform.

Off Piste Snow & Weather However, this is all going to change with some stormy unsettled weather ahead.

Looks like we may be receiving anything between 5 to 10 cm fresh snow above 1400 m on Friday, and possibly a lot more around Tuesday. We believe it’s going to get cooler too, at least down to seasonal norms. It won’t

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said, high shaded North facing slopes (above 2500 m or so) could revert to being unstable with any fresh snowfall, not having been stabilised by the same melting and subsequent refreezing as the warmer slopes.

Off-piste weather forecast for 26 to 30 January A cold depression is coming down from Ireland on the NE of the country by Frday morning, bringing us a little bad weather next night and tomorrow.

A small wave of cold air reaches Alps Saturday mid-day, bringing us more bad weather SATURDAY 2 A few cloudy residues in the morning then the sun, alternating with strong passages of high clouds covering summits. The wind from North to Northwest is slightly weaker (60 km / h from 3000/3500 m).

The temperatures go up again with 0 / -2 then 9/11 degrees towards 1000 m and -4 / -7 then 2/4 degrees towards 2000 m (isotherm 0 degree towards 1800/2000 m).

SUNDAY 3 and MONDAY 4 Sunday, regime from West to Northwest (50 to 60 km / h in the mountains) with sun and clouds of altitude that share the sky. Temperatures rise one or two degrees (isotherm 0 degree to 2400 m).

Monday, bad weather, rather active, in strong wind from West to South-west. The snow from 1600 to 1200 m even 800 m at night.

TUESDAY 5 and WEDNESDAY 6 Passages of bad weather will follow one

another in a current of West (SouthWest to North-West). Snow every day and sometimes a lot with the snow that makes the yo-yo between 800 and 1500m.

Temperatures are decreasing but are in season with 3 then 10/12 degrees in plain and 0 / -2 then 7/9 degrees to 1000 m.

THURSDAY 7 and FRIDAY 8 More bad conditions with wind on the massifs, widespread snow and a very fluctuating snow limit. Temperatures drop a little and go below average.

Tip of the week Don’t find yourself in the wrong place at the wrong time. Even though wet snow avalanches are predictable and only account for a very small number of avalanche accidents, we still need to watch out for them. Watch your timings, and be very cautious about venturing onto Southfacing slopes on warm sunny afternoons.

Similarly, never go on a closed piste. At this time of year it is usually closed because of avalanche danger.

Check the avalanche bulletins for snowpack reports as and when we get any fresh snowfall. In particular look for mentions of the stability of the snowpack and any weaknesses observed.

If we receive any fresh snowfall of more than 20 to 30 cm (possibly around Tuesday next week), proceed cautiously and start off on slopes of 30° steepness or less unless you really know what you’re doing.

Remember: the bigger the avalanche, the more vicious it is!

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Elysées wearing ‘gilets jaunes’ in protest. Macron’s comment, ‘You cannot be pro-environment on Monday and when Tuesday comes be against rising fuel prices’ is the kind of irrefutable logic which goes down like a fish milkshake with opponents, but should be deployed against those decrying Amazon and Google for tax evasion who wouldn’t forego a free internet search for the cheapest online deal in a month of Sundays.

Indonesia has launched a ‘heresy app’ to report anyone practicing ‘unorthodox interpretations’ of its recognised religions; well, pass my lover a bacon sandwich. A teenager matched with his sister on Tinder; yes, that does mean they both swiped right and yes they do live in the US. PETA has demanded the village of Wool, derived from the Anglo-Saxon ‘welle’ meaning a water spring, change its name to Vegan Wool be-

cause it ‘promotes cruelty’; same could be said of their abuse of the English language.

US Coast Guard reported a giant turtle, enmeshed in a rope holding 800Kg of cocaine worth £41m; bet it was Donatello. A former Miss Moscow, 25, has married Malaysia’s King Muhammad V, 49, after converting to Islam and taking the name Rihana; better hope that heresy app doesn’t get rolled out across the region.

And finally, Poundland’s Christmas advert has come under fire for mocking Elton John’s advert for John Lewis, depicting one elf orally relieving another sat on top of his piano; wonder if he was singing ‘Can you Feel the Love Tonight’. Until next week, I’m off to drink from a woolly spring.

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CHARITY ECHO T-SHIRTS

chance of keeping climate change at bay is by partially returning the surface of the Earth to the green, forested state it used to be in. More info at www.plantabillion.org/

Ecomove Val d’Isere is actually the largest ski area to We are very proud to unveil Echo T-shirts be granted Green Status by Green Globe and who better to team up with than due to the work the town does to minimise Planks. We wanted the T shirts to be well its environmental impact. Hand in hand made and look rad, so it was a no-brainer really. And it helps that Planks cares about with that is the Ecomove Collective, the their impact on the world and is constantly environmental arm of the Vie Val d’Is. They do incredible work helping the town to evolving to reduce their environmental impact. In line with that, all profits from the minimise its waste by providing reusable cups for many of the events, including the T-shirts will be split between two charities; a tree planting charity called Plant a Billion; Snow Shows, so that less disposable plastic is used. Likewise they give out portable and Ecomove, the Environmental Arm of ashtray to seasonaires and tourists to try the Vie Val d’Is. and minimise the number of butts that are dropped. Even so, a lot of litter is left on Plant A Billion the mountain once the snow melts after As the Echo is a printed magazine, we the end of the season including many lost require paper. Where possible, we try skis and poles. One of the most important to use recycled and hopefully next year, things Ecomove organises is Environment we’ll be printing exclusively on recycled Day in the summer, when an army of paper. However the best way we can volunteers scour the mountain and collect offset our impact on trees is by planting as much of this rubbish as possible. Last more of them, so one of the charities that year, a ton was collected and much of it these Tees will be supporting is the Plant is recycled, including the skis. You can a Billion foundation, the charity dedicated to planting a billion trees by the year 2025. find out more about the group’s work and They are well on their way to achieving this how to get involved at their Ecomove Day on March 26, which we’ll have more aim, with 81,012,757 planted (at time of information on soon. www.vievaldis.com/ writing) globally so far. The group choose valdisere/en/ecomove-2/ carefully where the trees are planted to make sure they The T-shirts have our logo printed can have the biggest impact on the front and are available in possible and contribute to either black or white. There is also educational work in areas the option to have the Val with important forest such as d’Isere logo on the back of Brazil in order to prevent further either colour. T shirts will be deforestation of vital rainforest. available in the Planks store or on the Echo website. Head to Although this may seem a little www.valecho.co.uk/shop to prefar removed from us here in the order yours now. Alternatively, mountains, it is generally considered that get in touch with Sam or Caitlin one of the best ways of extracting carbon to put in an order. from the atmosphere and thus having any

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PRAISING SKISUS In the last couple of weeks, we have seen a huge influx of punters adopting alternate ski carrying techniques, but it seems they may be on to something. With the severe lack of snow we are experiencing, it has become clear that we have upset a force much greater than the concentration of greenhouse gasses in the atmosphere. We must repent, and what better way to do this on the go than through the way you carry your skis.

The Crucifix Our lord and saviour famously made the ultimate fashion statement by carrying his skis in a cross style. Supposedly this technique can convert you from a regular dude to one of the most pivotal people in history so definitely recommended for budding social media influencers. Just sling your skis over your shoulder and make sure they are not inline with each other; the cross won’t make itself.

you also create a receptacle to fundraise to restore the church roof.

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Drag Away Your Sins As for You, You know me, Lord; You see me.

You test whether my heart is with You. Drag the wicked away like sheep to slaughter, and set them apart for the day of killing. (Jeremiah 12:3) Much like with the wicked, dragging your skis to slaughter the slopes is totally acceptable.

Additionally, rental companies LOVE this.

The Followers If you are anyone important, you should be the leader of a shred squad that is 12 deep.

Get each of your followers to hold a piece of your equipment and you’ll be set, just check Judas’ rucksack if a glove goes missing. This technique is not unlike ‘The Partner’ where you trade your cumbersome skis for your significant other’s poles.

Keep Them On

The Offering Hold your skis out in front of you, ready to offer up in case of the immediate coming of the rapture. Remember to rearrange when getting on the bus.

With the amount of Jerry’s we have seen skiing on the road, it seems like people really are preaching this.

The Collection Basket Otherwise known as the Houston handbag, this technique is a favourite of the hardcore punters. By hooking your poles round either end of your skis, you not only look great but

Now you know how to carry your gear, you must memorise A psalm of David: The shred is my shepherd, I lack nothing.

He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the shred forever.

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3RD

2ND

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Cocorico - Après Ski Live Music: The Blazin’ Strings

Le Hibou - Curry Night - Curry & A Pint/Glass of wine for only €15. Served 14.30 - 21.30.

Victors - Seasonaire Saturdays. Tacos & Tequila.

Bananas - Disco/Funk/House Night w B2B DJs Rob & Oscar

Petit Danois - Live Music 5pm: Jaw Bones Duo, 10pm DJ Jack Igglesden

Cocorico - Après Ski Live Music: Hobo Chic

Le Lodge - DJ K2 11:30pm-1:30am

Blue Note - Cheap Cocktails. 22h-23.30h

Saloon - That DJ Jay & 5 bottles of beer 20€

Petit Danois - Live Apres Music: 5pm Mardy Johnny Depps, 10pm DJ PSD

Arctic - Seasonaire Wknd Breakfast: Superfood Quinoa & Oat Porridge Pot plus a Latté for 8€

Saloon - Mullit & the Machine 17-19h happy hour 15-17h

Next Bar - Michouze (tribal, house, electro swing, techno to trance)

Next Bar - SUNDAY TECHNO NIGHT

Dick’s Tea Bar- Industry Night with JAMES LEVEY

Dick’s Tea Bar - Dirty Sunday hosted by Resident Marshall

Moris - Toss the Boss

6TH Snowpark-Sprite Cash 4 Tricks contest, BBQ,DJ Arctic - Midweek Refuel: Sandwich/Salad plus a latté for 10€, swap the coffee for juice for 2€ La Folie Douce - WTF Weekly costume party Cocorico- Après Ski Live Music: KTR8 Le Hibou - Wings Wednesday Saloon - 3€ JOSS! Or 10 for 25€ ALL DAY Bananas - Jungle & Liquid Night - B2B DJs. Dan & Lorien Petit Danois - Live Music 5pm Gallie, 10pm DJ Jack Igglesden Moris - Live Music: Mardy Johnny Depps followed by Coco & the Butterfields ‘for the last time this season’ Dick’s Tea Bar - After Dinner Club with Pocket Sized Dave accompanied by Sophia Landgren

In Town- Free backstag snowmaking works. Sig

Cocorico - Après Live M Arctic - Vinyasa Yoga C Arctic Juice. Sign up as IN TOWN - Airstar Nig entertainment and free

Victors -Hip Hop Thur

Saloon- Jaw bones 2 17

Petit Danois - Live Mu PSD 10pm

Moris - Live Music: The Doudoune- Cut Killer

Dick’s Tea Bar - Luna T D

COCORICO - 2-4pm Happy Hour, Live Music every day from BLUE NOTE - Happy Hour with Hot Gin and Nibbles from 3 to 6pm FALL LINE - Happy Hour 3-5pm PETIT DANOIS - Happy Hour 2 for 1 on Beers and Drinks 4-5pm & 9-10pm.

BANANAS - Seasonaire Menu: 3 Courses and a beer/wine/soft drink for €20 Happy Hours 18.30-19.30 and 22.30 SALOON - 3-6pm Happy Hour 2 for 1 on beer wine and more.

4TH

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5TH

In Town - Free Avalanche Safety talk in French and English at 6pm. Hut in Children’s Garden.

In Town ESF Snow Show La Daille: Torchlit descent of the OK, Fireworks and vin chaud

La Folie Douce - Discopolis

Cocorico - Après Ski Live Music: Wingmen

Arctic - Juice Pump - Do 30 Push Ups and get 50% off Juice or Coffee Cocorico- Après Ski Live Music: Les Lunettes Saloon - Welcome to our House, House night with That DJayG Vie Val d’Is - Weekly Language Exchange. Free French lesson for VVD card holders at 8pm Petit Danois - Live Music 5pm Mullit & The Machine, 10pm DJ Jack Igglesden Moris - Live Music: Apres- Max Whitthal, Evening: The Marivaux In Town - Film Night: Leo’s Lines and In Gorra showing for free at the Conference Centre 6pm Dick’s Tea Bar - Residents Megan and Marshall

Bananas - House & Tech night DJ Max Leaver Arctic - Tag Us Tuesday: Share your Arctic experience in a post/story and get a free juice shot Petit Danois - Live Music 5pm Revolverlites, 10pm DJ Jack Igglesden Victors - Funky Tuesdays with DJ Joblime Saloon - JackAttack & Triangle Tuesday 10 shooters 15€

Moris - Daisy & Tom followed by Queens of the Snow Stage Doudoune- Seasonaire Party with Shit Disco Dicks Tea Bar - Techno Tuesday

8TH

7TH

ge visit to discover how gn up for 3.45pm meet

Music: Tenacious Ski Class at 7pm with JJ @ s spaces are limited. ght. Light show, street e vin chaud on main street

rsdays with DJ Wanne

7-19h happy hour 15-17h

usic 5pm Guinea Pigs, DJ

e Blazin’ Strings

Thursday with DJ ALISON

Cocorico - Après Ski Live Music: Pink Miami In Town - Free Dance Show: Reconstitution @ CCAS 6pm Petit Danois - Live Music 5pm Karen & Andreas, DJ Jack Igglesden 10pm Next Bar - RUM&BASS night (Digital Reggea, Ghetto Funk / Funky Break, Glitch Hop / Bass House / Jungle / Bass Music) Moris - Live Music: Les Lunettes Saloon - J-bombs 3€ all day

Dicks Tea Bar - Guest DJ IamNikolaj

UNDERGROUND - Après Ski Tapas from 5pm LE PETIT CUISINE - Daily 12 - 3pm - Seasonaire Meal Deal VICTORS - Cocktail Hour 9-11pm LE LODGE - Happy Hour 4:30-7:30pm €4 large beer TDC Introduction To Ski Touring sessions running - http://www.tdcski.com/val_disere/ off_piste_valdisere/ski_touring.php: 25th March, 22nd April, 29th April

SPROG SEASON ROUND 4

doesn’t like broccoli).

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It’s good to have the wee man back in town though as I now have someone willing to (or at least unable to) complain about watching sport down the pub. As Angus doesn’t have any siblings, I can justify Notes from the Nursery Slope as Al and Abi Nasmyth navigate season life with a this as socialising practice. Admittedly his interpretation of socialising often involves wee one. just staring at people with his mouth open (which is unerringly similar to my pulling Al: Free time, I mean real free time technique as a young man) but people still (not just time when you’re not working or looking after your child; that’s called sleep) find it quite cute and talk to him until I bore them to death telling them clichéd boring is precious as a parent. So when Abi went home to see her parents recently I thought parenting stories that usually start, “Well he may look cute but…”. One demographic this was my chance to enjoy some of the fun bits that living in a ski resort has to offer. who seem to be quite taken by his baby charms are young women. Twice in the past week I’ve had complete strangers come up Firstly, take advantage of the amazing snow we had at the start of the month: tick! to me (him) and start talking to me (him) telling us (him) how cute we are. The last Secondly, stay up late getting smashed. time that happened to me I ended giving This I found much harder. I’m not sure monthly donations to Marie Curie, twice! whether it’s a result of age or being a Turns out having a baby is the third part of dad, but after a couple of pints followed the male attractiveness tri-vector. All I need by some stubbies whilst making dinner, now (apart from being single) is a dog and I’m finding myself waking up at 8 in the a guitar, and possibly the ability to play it. morning on the couch fully dressed. You may be thinking: mission accomplished, but Quite why the combination of father and child would hold such allure is quite beyond it’s less impressive when you passed out me when I look in the mirror and see my at 8pm. One of the tips annoyingly smug sleep deprived face and him covered in bits parent botherers on the TV are always of dried food we’ve not managed clean off banging on about is setting up a routine properly. for your child. It seems the devious infant has done it again and turned the tables Abi: Having just come back from an imprinting a routine on me! Stewie Griffin unexpected stint in the UK (my dad fell eat your heart out (interestingly he also ill but don’t worry he’s back propping up the bar at his local, so we’ve declared him back to full health), I’ve been able to compare some of the advantages and disadvantages of mountain life with a baby, to motherhood in the pleasant, if somewhat drizzle covered pastures of the North West of England. First up, baby or no baby, the only way to survive a winter in the UK is to remove all social media apps from your phone, as despite everyone bleating on

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about how darn cold it is, the grass is definitely snowier on the other side.

I couldn’t have timed it worse, the best snow blew in just as I was leaving and was coupled with Al having a lull in work so I was sprayed with smug shots of powder slashes providing unquestionable evidence that he was definitely enjoying himself and not stuck at home pining for his family – does the fool not know we are Facebook friends! It was mighty nippy back there mind. I don’t know if it’s the ridiculously draughty, “character full” houses my family favour or the dampness, but winters at home somehow feel colder than they are out here.

On the plus side, you could definitely stride confidently whilst sporting a child strapped to your chest due to the lack of surprise glaciers on north facing pathways and it’s a lot easier to get a replacement wheel for your second hand bargain buggy after treating it like a 4x4 on snow / grit covered roads. Parents not being as fit as they profess to once being however, meant that it was a challenge to get the pace and distance to entice the child into an appropriately deep coma prior to visiting the new, talk of the small town, coffee stop.

“The Cottage Tea Shop” of Frodsham was losing out to the surprising introduction of an Aussie, bare-brick walled, smashed avo and Vegemite vending venue, “Brew and Tucker”, almost certainly titled via www. hipsterbusinessname.com. The gossip contrasted a little to the apres chitterchatter of who did what with who in a cramped studio apartment, whilst their flat mates were relegated to carry on their evening in the bathroom. My dad’s khaki gilet wearing crowd were huffing with sighs of “can you believe it, they’re going to start charging for parking!” and “nice coffee but the cakes are a bit worthy”. A vegan lifestyle didn’t get my dad to where he is today…namely just out of hospital!

NEW STYLE

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TALK OF THE TOWN

Shine On You Crazy Diamond

Doudoune Boutique

With all the jackets going missing these days, you have to wonder where they end up. Finally though, some light has been shone on the situation. You may or may not know that Doudoune translates to ‘Coat’ in French. Peculiarly, Hannah apparently thought that it was a Doudoune shop.

Grandad on Grandad

With the vis as good as it is, it is crucial to make sure you look good from a distance.

Shiny blue onesies, manbags and gold sparkly wigs are so in right now. Falling over when getting on and off the chairlift is also apparently in.

Rhymes All The Times

When Nick and Harry were deciding on a chat up line to accompany the drinks they were sending to two girls in Victors, you have to assume they didn’t spend too long on it. Sadly there were no kisses on any cheeks but keep trying, chaps.

If someone asked you for a kiss, would you be so kind as to bestow one upon them?

Graham is that kind of guy, giving Laurie a big old smack on the lips at his request.

Don’t worry Laurie, Graham’s phone isn’t working at the moment but he has kept your number safe.

SPORT Shown at Le Petit Danois and The Moris:

FOOTBALL

Saturday 2nd March Spurs v Arsenal 1.30pm West Ham v Newcastle 6.30pm Sunday 3rd March: Watford v Leicester 1pm Fulham v Cheslea 3.05pm Everton v Liverpool 5.15pm Tuesday 5th March: Borussia Dortmund v Spurs 9pm Wednesday 6th March: PSG v Man Utd 9pm

46 Thursday 7th March: Rennes v Arsenal 6.55pm Chelsea v Dynamo Kyiv 9pm

6 NATIONS Saturday 8th Feb: France v Scotland 3.15pm, Wales v England 5.45pm, Sunday 9th Feb: Italy v Ireland 4pm,

Shown at Le Petit Danois, The Fall Line, Blue Note, Moris Pub and Le Hibou.

SEPARATED AT BIRTH

Daffyd Thomas

Jack Middlemiss

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DICKS TEA BAR 7TH MARCH PRESENTS

INFO@DICKSTEABAR.COM

+33 6 51 39 99 81