Violet Summer Zine Issue 9 - Love & Protest

VIOLET SUMMER ZINE ISS. 9 1

© 2020 Violet Summer Zine, All Rights Reserved.

Published by: Mel Writes, LLC

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PANDEMIC EDITION 3

Melissa Henderson

Ashley Uzer

Nicole Lockhart

Melissa is the founder of Violet Summer Zine and loves the beach. Any beach, really. She is currently working on digital rights advocacy projects and hopes to participate with more activities around the community and/or for the greater good. When she is not writing, she is at a workout class, eating mussels, or streaming a series like Greenleaf, watching Youtube how-tos and mini gossip sessions, or reading a book. Follow her work on www.violetsummerzine.com

Ashley is a writer, artist, and blogger with a focus on affordable fashion, plantbased food, travel, and lifestyle. She also sometimes get on her soapbox and talk about her soberish lifestyle or her obsession with gratitude journals.

Ashley has written for DC Magazine, Galore Media, Bustle, HelloGiggles, VICE, and more. Follow her on Instagram @AshleyGiov Read her work on page 19.

Nicole Lockhart is a writer living in Harlem, NYC. Her first novel, “ nadequate” was self-published in 2014.

She is also an accomplished filmmaker, her visual-poem “All My Black Sons” was an official selection of the Harlem International Film Festival. Her work focuses on the giving narrative voice to our greatest wishes and our deepest fears.

Her forthcoming title is a memoir, “Mrs. Putnam & Marcy” and will be published Fall 2020. Read her work on page 12.

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Aramide A. Tinubu

Kahlil Haywood

Stephanie Alexandre

Aramide A. Tinubu is a film critic and entertainment journalist. Her work has been published in EBONY, ESSENCE, Bustle, The Daily Mail, IndieWire and Blavity. She wrote her master’s thesis on Black Girlhood and Parental Loss in Contemporary Black American Cinema. She’s a cinephile, bookworm, blogger and NYU + Columbia University alum.

Follow her at @awordwitharamide. Read her work on page 24.

Kahlil is a writer and editor from Brooklyn, NY. His talents have been shared with such sites such as Bossip, Madame Noire, and Everything Girls Love.

He has been a part of web series such as “Ask A Black Man” and “When Black Men Listen To Black Women.”

He loves the bar “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others” as he believes it best describes the spirit in which he creates. Read his work on page 21.

Stephanie Alexandre is the founder of En Soleil.

“At En Soleil we help our customers extend their day by avoiding a long commute home between work and play, thus giving them more time to spend living in the sunlight! En Soleil is launching Summer of 2021 at the Refinery Hotel NYC. The space will be a relaxing, luxurious retreat where guests can unwind, decompress, and transition from work to play.” Visit www.ensoleilnyc.com/.Read our feature on page 26

Collaborators 5

Lacey Wilson

Alanna Heavenly

Raina Asid

Lacey is a published author, poet, and lover of all things creative, artsy, and design.

When she’s not writing, she’s reading, enjoying a cup of coffee, making local travel plans, or spending time in the California sun.

Read more of Lacey’s work on her website, laceycherice. com, and Instagram, @ laceycherice. Read her work on page 10.

Alanna is a Reiki Master, Energy Worker, Channel.She is the fire that ignites and illuminates your divinity.

She facilitates healing by channeling energy that is specific to your needs, providing personalized intuitive guidance to help you form a better relationship with body, mind and soul. Let’s create heaven on earth together. https:// www.alannaheavenly.com/ and @alannaheavenly on Instagram. Read her work on page 45.

Raina Asid is a graphic designer trying to make the world more aesthetically pleasing one image at a time. She is a consistent creator or some pretty dope illustrations. When is she not infront of her computer, she somewhere deep in The Golden Girls universe.

To see more of her work, follow her on instagram: @asidchronicles Check out

the zine’s art direction.

Collaborators 6

Features Reader Spotlight Love & Protest Poetry How To Love Us Reflections On Love Good Energy When Being Upfront Goes Wrong...

Summer Flings Writing Prompt #1 En Soleil BLM Protests In Los Angeles Digital Rights Update 5 Reasons Why Racism Is Wrong Writing Prompt #2 Eliminating Racism in the Medical Field Skincare Highlight: Yateou Violet Summer Solutions Sanity Addiction Part 5 Spiritual Love Notes

8 9 10 12 16 19 21 24 25 26 28 30 32 36 34 40 41 42 45

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With Love, From Kigali Say wassup to: Nshuti Bunyenyezi

VSZ: How are you?

Nshuti B.: Oh my days, my head is all over the place! There’s a civil rights movement going on right now and it’s been a real period of awakening for me. Which isn’t at all easy but so necessary. It’s forced me to educate myself and the more I read the more confident I feel to speak up and have more solution based conversations.

VSZ: I know everyone’s talking about BLM!! What’s the vibes over there?

Nshuti B: We all saw what happened to George Floyd and we all stand in solidarity with our black brothers and sisters in the United States in protest against systemic racism. The BLM’s traction on social media has also shone a light on some of the injustices we are facing right here in East Africa and has been a gateway for ‘millennials’ (hate the sound of that term) to start having serious conversations about change and a multitude of issues i.e. police brutality, tribalism, corruption, creative rights, intellectual property etc.

VSZ: Can you name any cool art, fashion, campaigns / people that have been producing dope stuff inspired by BLM? Nshuti B:My boy @akibahaiozi, he’s an AMAZING artist based in Kenya and he’s always made beautiful black art. Also my girl Gak put me on @theblackethreal a page curated by Danny Dunson @legacybros.

VSZ: Can’t believe we’re still dealing with this pandemic, how are your friends dealing with social distancing? Have you been through a quarantine before?

Nshuti B : I haven’t been through quarantine before this, no! I’ve been in Rwanda and we had a total lockdown for 6 weeks! I was working a lot from home so that kept me busy, the rest of the time I spent getting to know my hair. As far as social distancing, we hate it! Thank god I live in the same community as a few of them so we link, cook and sip on the weekends. It’s chill, I love it.

VSZ: What’s one thing you got tired of during quarantine?

Nshuti B : ZOOM CALLS! VSZ: What songs are on repeat? ( links to youtube videos, please!)

Nshuti B: This Sh!T – AYLØ feat Lmbskn - On Apple music and spotify , I Dunno – Tion Wayne, Dutchavelli, Stormzh, In Case – Show Dem Camp feat. Wani VSZ: What are your top 3 instagram accounts you check daily?

Nshuti B: @crwnmag, @dailyinteractions, @traceyellisross VSZ: If readers wanted to travel to East Africa or any part of African, what hot destinations would you recommend? Or any cool beach and entertainment destinations…

Nshuti B: NAIROBI Follow her on Instagram: @NshutiB 8

Love & Protest By: Melissa Henderson

The tip of the iceberg was the murder of George Floyd. The video circulated the internet less than 24 hours of Mr. Floyd’s death. “I can’t breath” were his last words. Those words were a call to the black community: Enough is enough. The #BlackLivesMatter movement was once again reignited, with new participants, millennials, GenZers, and allies from across the globe took to the streets and social media in solidarity. Some were having race relation conversations in private, some took to the streets to let out their anger. When we say, “we are tired,” that comes with over 400 years of our ancestors pain. My revolution was also getting louder.

My brother’s racial profiling incident a few months ago in March made me angry.

And as he made the headlines of many news sources from across the country, I read every article in utter disgust. How could the police be so cruel? The truth is, police brutality and violence are triggering to me. When Mr. Floyd’s death flooded my timeline, I could barely watch it, yet I was forced to see it. I was forced to be traumatized once again my people’s pain. Which reminded me of the subtle racism I was forced to also experience firsthand. My heartache every time I’d been judged from the color of my skin - from the white waiter passing the bill directly to a white colleague ( even though I was paying the bill) during a business lunch, to a white cop screaming at me to stay on my porch in the early 2000s because a dispute between teenagers had caused a scene that this white cop didn’t know how to handle.

Of course, there are countless incidents where me and my friends have experienced racism abroad, these memories never die. In those moments though, I’d become so de-sensitized to it and have deleted them from my life. However, no matter how much we try to erase them, they keep coming back like a cold sore on your lip. “I remember that time when....” But we are tired. And when Black people are tired, it comes from a different level of grief. It took a pandemic, high unemployment rates, “Karen,” and few unique planetary alignments for the entire world to wake up and address the ugly truth about racism. It has plagued our community for far too long.

But this “ideology” has fucked with the wrong generation. We want to be seen. We want to be heard. No more racist leaders. No more racist cops. No more racist school systems and public health programs. It’s time to re-write history by demanding compassion, respect, and reparations.

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Poems By: Lacey Wilson

Poem 1 Fragile soul.

This world will attempt to Rip you to shreds.

But how dare you not be deemed Worthy.

Poem 2 Stay wild with me.

We can play hide and seek In our bedroom and draw our names In the sand on every shoreline.

Together, in this resilient love, we will Learn how to live and breathe Adventure into the ordinary.

Poem 3 Was I buried or planted here?

Should I ask you to cover me with More dirt or water me daily?

My inability to understand the present moment Is how I got to this crossroads.

So, nevermind. Don’t answer those questions for me.

Instead, ask “heads or tails?” and flip a coin.

I guarantee you we will know whether to Rest in peace or dance with sunlight.

Holding onto hope Poem 4 My magic is behind my Dark chocolate eyes.

Fear of judgment, afraid to speak.

I hold the wisdom of my ancestors.

I have the vision of becoming; trapped In a world that misunderstands my language.

And yes, I will choose love The Black Child

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Mother She gave birth and felt the love of her life.

She gave birth and started another generation.

That generation started a generation.

She saved her family’s history in her bible by birthdate.

She kept remembering her momma’s birthdate.

Her momma remembered her momma’ s birthdate.

Until they couldn’t forget each other’s birthdate.

Beauty Momma was a beauty, so she birthed another beauty, and that beauty birthed a beauty.

Beauty was so strong, beauty lived through the dark ages.

Beauty was like a vessel to blood, a worm to warm soil, a ray of light to clouds.

Birthday Over the years, we couldn’t celebrate birthdays.

Birthdays went by without celebration, and like a candle still burning after a full night’s sleep, they were present, until it burnt out.

Then, one birthday lit an entire row of birthdays, until the light of birthdays gained back it’s flame of birth.

Love She gave her first love a birthdate their marriage was birthed, jumping over a broom at sunset.

Remember She forgot her own birthdate until it was nothing of her left.

She told her children to say her name to remember.

-Birth

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How To Love Us By: Nicole Lockhart

My favorite movie sex scene was in Something New. Sanaa Lathan, a successful black woman with a new home, falls for her contractor played by Simon Baker after denying him on a blind date because he’s white. With “Seconds of Pleasure” serenading their glorious bodies intertwined, my teen eyes watched with jaw to the ground thinking “Oooh she done, done it now!” Comedian Tracey Ashley got some great wedding advice for her and her newlywed husband. “Whenever the two of you fight don’t ever make it about race.” The comedian jokes about storming out of their apartment and coming back to a “White’s Only” sign on the bathroom.

While interacial marriages have only been legalized in America for 57 years (Loving V. Virginia) as I pen, there remains a unique dynamic for the couple in contemporary society. If you are the partner of a BIPOC, here is a list of ways you can make your significant other feel loved.

1. They are close to their family Even if they tell you troubled things about them or the family structure looks a little different than yours (ie. they call their grandma “Mom” because that’s who raised them)--know that it is a family built on love. To love them is to love their family.

And as their partner it’s important that you make every effort to get to know them and build your own relationships with every (you read what I said) one of them.

Otherwise you will not win your partner’s affection. In the back of your partner’s mind is what their mama said about you after you left the room. You’re a stranger until they all get to know you and see how the two of you interact, not until you meet them.

2. Don’t Use Her Shampoo For heterosexual couples and relationships with Trans womxn, please apply. This is an exercise of privilege that you as a non-POC have. Shampoos & Conditioners for black hair in particular are expensive and have to be bought by the ½ gallon sometimes in order to last through several washes. The chemical structures in regular shampoo will kill your partner’s hair, leaving you with a bald or crispy headed looking lover. Just use a bar of soap, a privilege they do not have. Or better yet, bring your own toiletries to leave at their place.

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3. Don’t Eat Our Food.

When at a restaurant, keep your hands and fork on your plate until invited to try something. And definitely don’t take any without asking. You will lose a hand or at very least get stabbed. This goes for interactions with families, see No. 1. There’s a saying in the black community “If you wanted this, you should’ve ordered it.” If we’re sharing everything, then cool we’re sharing. But if it’s on my plate, it’s going in my mouth.

4. Let Them Pick the Movie or TV Show There is a whole world of shows you probably haven’t seen or even heard of. Let your lover pick some movies or your next Netflix binge. You might like Queen Sugar, or at very least learn about interactions between people of other races amongst each other.

Some of the shows are probably not as interesting as Game of Thrones and they may be sappy or soapy, but this is a great way to broaden your horizons to include a new worldview.

5. Listen to the Holiday Rules Reference rules 1 & 3. Also know that you will stay their “Lil Friend” until you get married. Sometimes even for the first few years of marriage. That’s your name now so answer to it. It’s a badge of honor.

6. Ask Her About Personal Stories of Racism Today’s world is forever polarized by the death of George Floyd, but understand that this has been a wound for BIPOCs for as long as we’ve had consciousness in America. It follows us everywhere and in every sphere of our life. It hurts like nothing you can ever explain… but let your partner try. With you they should feel safe enough to expose those mean and painful happenings. They make your partner strong AF. You don’t have to apologize. You can’t fix it. But you can support them by holding space. The distinction is in how you show up and remind them that they are more than enough--especially because the world has always seen them otherwise.

7. Use Your Privilege to Defend Them This may look different depending on who your partner is, but the overwhelming feeling for most BIPOCs is summed up in one word: Tired. We’ve fought for ourselves for so long that it would be the biggest relief to just have someone who doesn’t have to try so hard, push for us. And additionally, make sure they’re not tap dancing extra when they come home to you from the world that’s worn them ragged all day.

8. Say Something about BLM I don’t care what your allyship looks like but it has to be stated that silence is not the response that’s going to get you laid. In all seriousness, it is too much to 13

stomach your accidental micro-aggressions and your complicit behavior too. If your uncle makes weird comments, don’t just not bring your partner around them--say something to his face (or facebook). Do not let it be said that you did not have the time to make your voice loud in disagreement. See rule 7. Allyship has taken many forms, financial contributions, protesting, supporting BOBs, etc. Just make sure your lover knows you’re in the fight with them and for them.

9. Make Love to Them in Their Headscarf or Durag If your partner has a bonnet on and is ready for bed or a chilling with thier durag on playing video games... this is a golden ticket. Just trust me. Any other time our protective hair wraps are off, please respect the crown. Our hair was not meant to have fingers run through it. A gentle pull will do.

10. Be Their Loudest Champion See rule 7 and 8. I don’t care if they want to go back to school, change careers, build a bird sanctuary, or move to Timbuktu. Whatever it is they want to do, they should have your support and not your criticism. Love liberates, it does not dictate. You have a real queen or king on your hands and they deserve to be told that as often and in as many ways as possible. Shine a light on your diamond beauty and watch their brilliance shine before the world. In return, you will get the best cheerleader, partner, friend, lover you have ever had.

11. Learn from Your Efforts If anything ever pops up between you like a racial comment or harmless joke, take the time to learn from the microaggression. It’s inevitable and even though you “have plenty of black friends” or have “dated a black girl before”, that something will come out a little sideways. We hope you mean well when comparing your sun tan (which is a privilege) to our skin color; but when we correct your comments, take it gracefully.

We didn’t “make it about race” you did.

12. Tell Your Peoples Don’t assume we can walk into your family beach house, go as your date to a function, or attend your office holiday party without them being alerted. We know a phoney “Oh, Nice to meet you!” when we see it. If they don’t know you’re dating a POC, please prep them with a photo of us first. Note: you do not have to say “By the way, my partner is Black” especially if you’re not close to the person and it is a professional setting we will be attending. Your being there with them proudly does a lot on it’s own. But nobody wants to feel like a surprise or an awkward conversation you’ll be having later when we’re not around.

13. Talk Children Ahead of Time If having a family is important to you, this is a big one. No one can prepare you for 14

parenting, but building a family of blended races requires some forethought and conversation that most homogeneous relationships can avoid. There will be some surprises in comparing the way you were raised. See these as opportunities to create a family that is not only unique but unified.

14. Exampleship Takes Work Know that your relationship will in some ways serve as an example for others. It may bring up bigatries they didn’t know they had. It may isolate certain friends or family members you love and respect. You may have to put a stranger in their place. But with all that being said, do the work. Let love, and not your skin, be the example that people want to follow. People might be so inspired by how you love one another that they forget what race was in the first place.

15. Basically be Alexis Ohanian That part.

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Reflections On Love By: Melissa Henderson Love can be blind. Over the years, I’ve written about various forms of love and how experiencing it has made me uncover crazy truths about myself. Issue 1 of VSZ was all about my obsession with unrequited love and experiencing all my flaws in the digital age. “When Your Crush Texts You Back” was written about being a Marxist lover who gets tainted by the subtlest traits of a person of deep interest. In some ways, earlier in my life, I felt trapped in my own love story and it prevented me from truly being authentically myself with whoever I showed interest in. These views made me realize that maybe I wasn’t good at picking out the right one and maybe I paid too much attention to judging a book by its cover, instead of reading it for what they were worth. These ideologies lead me down a few roads where I was exposed to the spectrum of being controlled and also the person doing the controlling. As soon as I started feeling like I wasn’t good enough to be loved in a way that would benefit me, the relationship fell apart, egos took over and the shared love that bonded us both together in the first place disappeared.

“Me and this guy were both totally engrossed in our narcissistic habits and, in the end, it probably ruined any hope for us in the future. I was loosely dating Jason* for a few weeks when my attraction for him grew at a pace I wasn’t able to constrain. We had met on normal grounds. Totally sober in the early summer days just when the sun was setting on a glass-enclosed art gallery. You could say we backed into each other because we were looking at different paintings on the opposite ends of the room. From that moment, I fell deeply in-like with Jason. My thoughts took over me. I was vexed. There were many nights spent wishing on full moons, fantasizing about what life could be like with him in the first few days of meeting even though I knew very little about his whereabouts.

But I was sure he was perfect. Jason was the quintessentially charming Sex and the City type of guy. He was creative, handsome and a real gentleman who walked on the left side and offered me his coat when I refused to wear my own. I wouldn’t say he’d carry my purse, but on special occasions a girl got lucky. After a few months of feeling each other out, I was losing my patience with Jason regarding his inconsistencies and horrible communication skills. Jason was, like, allergic to the phone. Where the hell was he when I needed him on lonely nights?” - Issue 1, When Your Crush Texts You Back In retrospect, feeling vulnerable in life and my work has gained me a community of readers. I wasn’t alone in the way I was learning about love and life. When I wrote 16

Sanity Addiction Part One, I was truly broken, living in my blue period, and it was based on true accounts I experienced between me and close friends. I was in the thick of love when I wrote this short story. I quickly learned what it meant to be crazy in love, knowing it was toxic but still allowing this person into my space. I was greeted by the ugly side of love. The vulnerabilities of how drugs and alcohol can make someone act in a way that is not of their normal behavior- break glass, spit, cuss at the sky in broad daylight, and in public. It was embarrassing to my self-worth when it was all said and done. I lost platonic friendships in the midst of it. I hid from the world until I was ready to be loved and love again. Of course, these types of relationships don’t last forever, yet I continued to waste my time navigating rough patches with fleeting sexual connections. They pushed me to discover what love is not. Suddenly the fairytale love stories I sort of grew up wishing for, were shattered with the biggest awakenings of my life.

“I opened another door in the dark short hallway that guided me to the music and people.

All I could see in front of me was the red lights. The room reeked of cigarette smoke and weed. I instantly sensed Jacob and his shadow coming closer towards me. I could barely see him, but I could feel his energy. We embraced, timidly. After all, it was only our second physical meeting. Technically, this was a date in my eyes. A very non-traditional date, but a date nonetheless. He handed me a drink and whispered “you smell good” in my ear. I melted. Then he kissed me on the cheek and my body language instantly shifted.

My chest fell slightly into his, my nose grazed his cheek, our breaths intertwined, and he smelled pretty good himself, as his head shifted, planting another gentle kiss on my lips.

I caught it, breathing everything in. I pursed my lips for more, but it was over as soon as I blinked open my eyes. “That’s just a taste” he appeared to be saying as the music glared in the red-lit warehouse. My heart beat faster, I got a little wetter, and I took his hand to follow him back into the only lighted area.” -- Sanity Addiction Part One, Issue 2 By the time that story ends, the reader is left both aroused and disturbed. Weirdly enough, this is the type of shock therapy my audience gravitated to as the underlying messages to this story are about revenge porn, addiction, and being yourself even if it means having to go crazy. The goal is to get back to normalcy. Yet again no one warned me that after you go through some shit in life, it’s impossible to be the same way. I needed time to just heal in the sense that I was pressing too hard on myself to spotlight my mistakes and triumphs with love.

In some ways, I passed the baton to contributors to share their bouts with love. I allowed myself to gain inspiration from them. The zine’s content doesn’t always have to be so one dimensional, especially when it comes to love. Ashley Uzer writes so candidly about her dating app adventures, including the time she hooked up with a guy from Planet of the Apes movie. Sometimes, when I want a good laugh, I read her essays to get me through whatever shitty situation I’m going through at that moment.

“My favorite anecdote thus far is when an actor who legit played an ape in Planet of 17

The Apes told me we should cancel our date because the energy was off. We had been messaging on Raya — an invite-only dating app known for its celeb members — for a few days. When he admitted he was an actor, I made a sassy comment about the feeling I had been “bait and switched” because he didn’t disclose the list on his profile. He was not happy about this comment. After his defensive statements, he sent me a YouTube link to some of his acting. I initially thought he sent it as a joke because it was a clip of a bunch of monkeys. Had I not watched it for one more second, I would have messaged him saying, “good thing I love hairy guys.” But, I eventually saw him getting interviewed about his role as an ape. I’m not sure if I didn’t act impressed enough, or he reflected longer on my former statements, but a day or two before our scheduled date, he messaged me saying he decided we probably shouldn’t go out because he felt there was bad energy.”

- You Have Good Energy, Issue 5 (Read full version on the next page) Recently, I’ve been debating unrequited love in my head and if I could believe in such a thing in this day in age. Before Corona, for a women’s day event at my church, I was invited to read scripture during a weeknight service. Even though I practiced reading over the few lines I was assigned by a deacon when it was my turn to stand at the pulpit, I became nervous because this was my testimony. In front of my spiritual leaders and friends, plus fashion’s most prized godfather looking at me, new feelings reigned over me that evening. I could have passed out from the wave of emotions, but I pushed through in a tone that was at equilibrium for my acceptance of love at this point: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hope, always perseveres.8 Love never fails.. - 1 Corinthians 13 When I made my way back to my seat with the rest of the congregation, the deacon said to me, “You got a boyfriend?” “No.” I responded, “ Well, I’m going to find you one.” “Great, make sure he’s tall, dark, and handsome.” I smiled back to my seat wondering what made her say that instead of a generic “God bless you.” Weeks later, this exchange stuck with me until I made myself commit to why I was so affected by this and it’s because of the emphasis on titles. Earlier in my dating life, I was so attached to titles and labels that being in the moment was lost with the anxiety of who the person I was currently “getting to know” was to my life. I committed to relationships on the strength that we looked good in photos. I even sacrificed my own hunger just because I wanted to be in solidarity to that person. It was silly to think that I shouldn’t eat when I wanted to because that person was too broke to buy his own food. LOL Clearly, I was dating the wrong person. I ignored moments that could have been valuable to my decision making, I loved too hard when there wasn’t anything really to love in the first place. But I’m sure you’re wondering if I learned how to move forward, and the answer is no, not really and I’m just going to sit with that until something feels right again...

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Good energy By: Ashley Uzer It’s around 8:30 PM on a Sunday night, and the guy I just went on a first date with is currently holding my trash bags while I strut around the home supplies aisle at Ralph’s. I couldn’t carry the trash bags myself, because I’m currently cradling a 12-count of toilet paper.

For all the east coasters, Ralph’s is the standard LA grocery store for the non-boujie of us that can’t afford Erewhon. For all the people wondering what kind of person would invite their date to accompany them on a toilet paper grocery run...nice to meet you. I’m Ashley, and I just moved to LA about a month ago.

Most girls seem to hate LA’s dating scene, saying the guys are all fuckboys or divas that expect girls to “work” for them. I’ve noticed LA guys are much less likely to ask for a second date when there clearly was no chemistry on the first. On one hand, this could mean they’re not “working” for it enough, but on the other, I think this just saves us both a lot of time.

There’s also the blind confidence of some of the men here, like the stereotypical stoner bro who said he saw me walking down the street in my The Doors t-shirt and whipped his car around to come talk to me by knocking on my car window in the parking lot (yes, I went out with him and yes, he sells weed for a living). But it’s not the same blind, almost rape-y confidence of east coast guys. East coast men seem to be more like, “I know you said you don’t want to go to dinner with me, but maybe if I invite you to Tao (or Miami) for the fifth time, you’ll decide to say yes.” LA guys, in my experience thus far, are more like, “I’m going to shoot my shot because you have “good energy,” but every step of the way I’m going to check in and make sure you’re still into what’s going on. If not, I’m not going to try to convince you.”

The “you have good energy” thing seems to be how guys say “I like your tits” in LA-lingo. Those same guys may also ask for your horoscope sign and Google your compatibility seconds after your first date.

I always thought the idea of using “what’s your sign?” as a pick-up line was a joke, but I think literally every date I’ve gone on since moving to LA has involved me disclosing my horoscope sign (scorpio, BTW). Countless other interactions have involved guys trying to guess my horoscope sign—whether it occured in an Uber Pool or at a bar. According to the people in LA I may have some Gemini tendencies?

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While this obviously sounds like a hilarious cliche come to fruition, I honestly prefer it to east coast guys’ refusal to even entertain the idea of the zodiac because it “can’t be real” (or more realistically, because it’s perceived as a “girl thing”). Even if you don’t believe in it, you can discover a lot about a person by discussing their sign.

When a guy asks for my sign, I usually describe that, true to my sign, I’m very sexual, a total control freak in most aspects of my life, and emotional deep down but behind a hardened facade. I mean, I think those are good things to know about someone before you continue going out with them, don’t you?

Of course, there are places where these cliches err on the bad side (or hilarious side, depending how you look at it).

My favorite anecdote thus far is when an actor who legit played an ape in Planet of The Apes told me we should cancel our date because the energy was off. We had been messaging on Raya — an invite-only dating app known for its celeb members — for a few days. When he admitted he was an actor, I made a sassy comment about feeling I had been “bait and switched” because he didn’t disclose list it on his profile.

He was not happy about this comment. After his defensive statements, he sent me a YouTube link to some of his acting. I initially thought he sent it as a joke, because it was a clip of a bunch of monkeys. Had I not watched it for one more second, I would have messaged him saying, “good thing I love hairy guys.” But, I eventually saw him getting interviewed about his role as an ape. I’m not sure if I didn’t act impressed enough, or he reflected longer on my former statements, but a day or two before our scheduled date, he messaged me saying he decided we probably shouldn’t go out because he felt there was bad energy.

It sounds funny, but in reality it was a good thing. Like I mentioned before, I think LA guys pick up on things quicker—or maybe they’re just less desperate and don’t need to shoot a million shots hoping one will hit. Ape-y and I were never going to seriously date, and judging by my reactions to his photos upon second glance, we were never going to have sex either. Why not save us both the time and trouble and cancel our date for an innocuous reason? Because truly, you don’t need a good reason not to go out with someone. We’re all busy.

Oh, and back to the toilet paper guy. I did warn him not to come into Ralph’s with me. I told him to call his Uber at Ralph’s instead of walking me the extra block home, because I had to run in and grab something. When he persisted — assuming if he made it to my front door, maybe I’d invite him inside — and asked what I had to buy.

I told him straight up. Keep in mind he did not live in LA, he was just visiting—hence the persistence. He said something like, “wow, you really put it all out there.” And, to be honest, maybe I do...but maybe it also had something to do with the fact that I knew I probably never wanted to see him again. And, like I said, we’re all busy.

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When Being Upfront About Your Intentions Goes Wrong...

By: Kahlil Haywood

With the most unique summer ever on the horizon, we fantasize about...freedom. It’s usually around this time of year where we plan trips and other activities to fill out the longer days and shorter nights of the season. In addition to that, the summertime is synonymous with flings. It’s synonymous with dating and spontaneous sex, many times with new people. Well in the spirit of said activities, I’d love to share a unique experience I had with a young woman. It’s one of the most unique experiences that I’ve had in my 31 years.

There is nothing like when you happen to click with someone in bed. Sometimes you share real biological chemistry that can only be described as such. Well, I once met a woman through work a while back. For the longest time, we would flirt and flirt.

Finally, one New Year’s Day I decided, I’m going to go see this girl. The time for talking was over. It was time to back up all that my slick mouth was saying. In the days leading up to this, it was clearly understood the spaces in our lives that we were both in. I wanted the flexibility to date people and have that experience. She was on board with that. Since that was the case, I felt perfectly comfortable letting her know that I wanted to see her and that the time for all the flirting was over.

I thought we had good chemistry in our conversations. We had similar views on sex, but you just never really know until you know, you know? The time finally came. I woke up that New year’s Day rather early. I made a hearty breakfast, took a shower, and was restless. Finally, I thought to myself, “man all that shit you’ve been talking, you need to see what this woman is up to.” So I reached out and told her that I was up and ready to come through if she was home. She obliged. Once I parked, I gave her a call to let her know that I had reached. Once I did, she responded saying “the door is open.” Now I’m thinking well shit, iight then. I passed through the driveway as she lived in a basement apartment. I close and lock the door behind me. Minus the area where the door was, the rest of her spot was dark. The only place where light was 21

emanating from just happened to be her room where the door was closed.

I walked towards the back and opened the door and she laid in the bed under her covers. I said hi said hi back as she laid there. She wasn’t getting up. So I thought to myself...maybe I should join her, right? So I felt under the sheets to see if she was clothed and she had minimal clothing on. I thought that it would just be rude to get in this bed with clothes on, so I made sure that I had on minimal clothing too. I put my stuff to the side and get in behind her. I was the proverbial big spoon. I said hey to her again, and we just laid there for maybe two minutes or so. Our breathing was almost in sync. It began getting a little more intense. As I caressed her left thigh she brought my hand up higher to feel on her left breast. After that, I knew that this was about to be something else.

The connection was instant. Things escalated from feeling breasts to twisting and sucking nipples. Every movement was so organic that you would’ve thought it was perfectly choreographed. After making sure I ate my meal, I just had to know how she felt inside. When I slid inside her slowly, I can assure you that I dead ass felt at home. Everything flowed, I think us being very comfortable with each other catalyzed all of that. We went at it. We sweat. She choked me, I choked her. She got on top of me and got hers. I sat up to get closer to her ears, and I got mine. The whole thing just couldn’t have gone any better. Why can’t workout plans be that fulfilling? Four rounds later I knew two things. I knew that this shit hit and that what we discussed prior may very well be out the window according to her. I just had a feeling that things were going to change and that this young lady was going to want more.

We both raved about our experience with each other. It was refreshing, it was satisfying. At that time, I wasn’t enthusiastic about traveling too far to see someone regularly. This woman lived in a borough that wasn’t the most convenient to get to.

Since we established that we both were single I didn’t anticipate that I would have to make myself available to her more often. My concerns at that time were about allowing time for myself and also anyone else that I wanted to entertain. The fact that she didn’t live in Brooklyn was an added element that for me loaned itself to not frequently seeing her.

Being that we connected as well as we did in bed, I noticed that she was seeking more from me. She wanted to be in contact a lot more often. I didn’t mind that. But she then expressed that she wasn’t seeing me often enough. At that point, it had been about a week since we had our first encounter. I told her that I understood, and that I would try to oblige, but that I wanted to try and still maintain my ability to actively date. That meant that I wouldn’t always be available when she wanted me to be. I thought before getting into all of this that it was clear that there weren’t any expectations of anything more. I started to realize that I couldn’t be farther from the truth. I guess ultimately, I felt like I was being asked to operate like a boyfriend as it pertained to maintaining a certain schedule for her.

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About a week after the young lady told me that she wanted to see me again, I made my way across the bridge. Again, another fulfilling time for both of us. I thought to myself “damn, I’m really in the shit now.” There was a change happening, I felt it. In the following days, this young lady would tell me she missed me. I appreciated the remarks. I enjoyed the time we spent. But this was a red flag for me. A woman saying she missed me, compounded by the fact that she has alluded to it before in regards to not seeing me enough, heightened my senses. At that point, I felt that I had a responsibility to sort of reiterate what I thought the nature of our relationship was.

One day we spoke on the phone and I told her that I’m humbled and I felt great to be missed. I told her that I enjoyed her company as well. But I also had to reiterate everything that I mentioned from the beginning. That was that I wanted to be able to have the flexibility to date, and sometimes that meant not being free on weekends.

I also reiterated that I just didn’t want to frequent the commute to her place.

Essentially, I let her know that if you need someone to be more present for you, I don’t know if I can fulfill that desire. If that was the case, I thought that we should end things then in the physical sense because these were elements I did not feel like taking on. I had no interest in having obligations to see someone on a certain basis when it wasn’t my intention for things to take on a more serious vibe, to begin with.

Begrudgingly, she obliged. I thought we were. We never slept together again.

We shared seven jam-packed and memorable rounds. We’ll always have that. But ultimately, I think what we ended up doing was best. This was one of the most unique experiences I’ve had in my adulthood. This was the most egregious example of having one understanding in the beginning and someone switching up the parameters when they saw fit. We saw things in two different ways. It was a damn head-scratcher.

Why do I even bring this story up anyway? Because I want you guys to be as woke in your dating lives as you are protesting on these streets. DO NOT GET GOT! Also, be responsible. Communicate with people. Hold people accountable. I would’ve been wrong to keep messing with this woman knowing that she had stronger desires for something more than I did. I refuse to lead someone down a primrose path. It’s not my steez, and it shouldn’t be yours either.

This is the summer season, the weather has been right from the beginning. The quarantine will not last forever and you will meet some new “tings.” Be responsible for these people. As a courtesy, look out for their emotions. Sometimes that clouds all that should make sense for them. I always thought speaking clear English and being very deliberate about my intentions would protect me from most conflicts.

Quite frankly it avoids certain conversations and opens up other ones. Ultimately, my integrity is what I want to reign supreme. Let that always be your calling card. As they say… stay solid.

These are my words and I make no apologies.

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Summer Flings By: Aramide Tinubu

On a warm evening in early September, we said goodbye. I stood outside of my apartment building clinging to you, desperate to memorize your scent and the way your body felt molded against mine. All those months earlier, I’d jumped out of an Uber in the middle of a rainstorm in Harlem, nonchalant and unexpecting. You “got” me from the jump, your sexy stoic nature, matching my whimsical and often outlandish one. Over Sylvia’s Soul Food right off of 125th street, I felt my soul reconnecting with an old friend. I was so floored by that feeling that I told you then, on that first date (never one to hold much back) and you laughed, taking no offense because you inherently understood. Long winding walks through the Bronx zoo, pizza and Disney flicks, and milkshakes. The reverence that you showed me and my brown skin, kisses at 4 am, back rubs and black silk sheets and so much freedom to speak; to be me. I floated through those long sticky days; secret smiles a constant on my face.

I’ve always thought summer had magical qualities, (perhaps it’s because I was born in the middle of July), and that proved true because it brought me you. As I sit in silence now, the scent of my zillion candles wafting through my apartment, I can still see you and hear you; as if your arms were still around me. That loud laughter that you always inspired; bubbling up inside of me begging to be released; desperate to be released.

That’s the thing about flings, though; they exist in a magical snow globe of sorts; encasing you in protectively from the world as all of that marvelous joy swirls around you. But inevitably you shake the globe too hard and the glass cracks, splintering up the sides until it shatters completely; leaving you bare and exposed; but wistful and longing nonetheless.

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Writing Prompt Do you ever come down on the people you love too hard because you’re afraid of them?

Write about the intersection of love and fear.

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En Soleil In Partnership with VSZ

A few days before lockdown, Stephanie Alexandre, founder of En Soleil, and I had planned to meetup and discuss the launch of her forthcoming summer pop up space at the Refinery Hotel in Bryant Park, New York. We were planning the elements of a party that would also include a Violet Summer reading, but fears of contracting a deadly virus loomed in on our plans. Suddenly En Soleil, a retreat space for commuters to take a breather from their daily commuter, was put on pause like the rest of the world. By this time, stay at home orders were put in place by government officials advised by the CDC and telework was in full effect. Our plans for the next two months were cancelled indefinitely.

Stephanie called me to break the news that the hotel she had planned her summer partnership with was also closing until further notice and that the En Soleil popup space would launch summer 2021. It was a big bummer after months of planning and fundraising efforts on ifundwomen.com. But I was determined to figure out how we could build a true partnership and finesse her vision into the current landscape.

According to emarketer, the cancellation of major events has incurred over $1 billion in direct economic losses, including SXSW and E3. Due to COVID, many businesses were forced to close permanently or have been lucky enough to pivot strategies to keep their customers engaged during the pandemic. However, being on lockdown has its perks as hundreds thousands of people flocked online to apply for new businesses from March to May. This new black swan of a shift, has managed to attract new and old entrepreneurs, which is why I encouraged En Soleil to go virtual and embrace the new territory.

“At first, I wanted to create a space for people on-the-go to take a breather.

My commitment to providing that service is still present, just in the form of a subscription box. It’s a stressful time… I want to really add value to people… not being able to see people in person may be tough. En Soleil’s box aims to help people feel pampered and keep their spirits up.” - Stephanie Alexander, Founder of En Soleil Suddenly plans and ideas were back in action! The hotel space that En Soleil was initially supposed to occupy was now developing into a subscription-box, like a Quibi. For less than the cost of a luxurious hotel stay or even a round trip plane ticket, anyone could purchase a “retreat box” packed with women-owned and black26

female-led products. Since spas aren’t opening up anytime soon or the idea of them gives you COVID-ptsd, En Soleil’s subscription-based virtual retreat box could very well satisfy your self-care appetite.

The radical growth of subscription-based services has garnered over 50 percent of consumers today. Almost everyone has subscribed and is paying for something on a monthly basis. According to a study conducted by McKinsey & Company, subscription-based brands fall into three categories: replenishment, curation, and access. So if you’re a business entrepreneur facing challenges due to COVID, don’t give up and just close. Look at industry trends to inform your next move like En Soleil.

Starting on June 20, to celebrate the summer solstice and to stay on schedule with the original launch date set forth, En Soleil will host a virtual retreat with 2 lucky people across the country. Each person even gets a plus one! Basically, this box is everything you need to create your getaway from home. The customized En Soleil box comes filled with over $400 worth of goodies including a weekend pass to the pop-up space when it can safely open. To learn more about the this brand or to purchase a pass to their Summer 2021 pop-up space in New York City, visit: https://www.ensoleilnyc.com/

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BLM Live from Los Angeles By: Bellamy Brewster

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JSYK: Digital Rights versus Social Media By: Melissa Henderson Every year, the plight to transform and participate in the conversation about digital rights gets challenging as our standards to how we organize as a community evolve.

This year, technology has played a role in the Black Lives Matter Civil Rights Movement. One minute, I’m watching GRWM Youtube videos, and the next minute, Mr. George Floyd’s last 8 minutes and 46 seconds are flooding my timeline. There was no escaping it, yet this was the tipping point to awakening the hundreds of years of pain Black and brown people keep having to endure in real life. This time, the clip and the BLM movement unapologetically ignited a global conversation that called for everyone to get involved, from the streets and the boardroom. To combat systemic racism means re-examining every part of how we function and find success in a place of commonality and skin-toned. Aside from promoting diverse leadership, the concept of technology also needs an overhaul in staffing, ideologies, and functionality. We can’t ignore the biases that exist in engineering, writing code with a lack of intention to how codes could further perpetuate disparities in race via information technology. This includes facial recognition algorithms that are programmed to target general features like skin color, hair, nose, and lips. If white coders only know that black people have “big noses and lips” they will write code that identifies us as such and will ignore the nuances that exist. This is why when cops use this technology for policing, they are more likely to misidentify “criminals.”

According to a report supported by the FBI, “feature extraction generally relies on an offline training stage that utilizes exemplar data to learn improved feature combinations.” Most coders don’t go through demographic training at all, they write based on what they know and with no one around them to correct them. Moreover, The Guardian and many other independent sources, have warned about the danger of racialized code and “think that facial recognition software has problems recognizing black faces because its algorithms are usually written by white engineers who dominate the technology sector. These engineers build on pre-existing code libraries, typically written by other white engineers.”

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Now if Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter can control algorithms based on what users are exposed to, sell data based on our private search interests, and corroborate with the government to share information from their platform, don’t you think these platforms should be held accountable for more than just a social platform?

Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act is one helluva law. Not only does this law protect social media platforms and mobile apps from all the obscenities that exist within their platforms, but it also exempts them from being classified as publishers or media, thereby protecting their first amendment right of free speech.

But what happens when this free speech gets confused with truth and news? A user can post whatever they want on Facebook or Instagram and these same platforms are not held liable, nor do they care about the harmful content coming from people with large followings. Ahem, Trump, and Maga supporters. The Black Lives Matter movement has pushed us to act on a new system of accountability, showcasing that racist bigotry will not be tolerated on social media or writing code. Twitter’s CEO Jack Dorsey has risen to the challenge of going against #45 by tacking on informational footnotes to his Twitter posts that could be misleading to users. This is the first time a social platform has dared to challenge one of the world’s greatest bullies. To prevent the spread of misinformation, Twitter has changed its “resharing” capabilities that will make users click the link first before sharing because we all know how much headlines are clickbait. Social platforms aren’t just digital photo books, they are agents of social justice and mini-rallies. They can be biased depending on which algorithm you’ve been inserted into. If we’re only exposed to content that a robot thinks we care about, imagine what else exists beyond the assumptions written by someone who doesn’t give a fuck about equality and respect? Meanwhile, Mark Zuckerberg is realizing that maybe his shitty business ethics are catching up to him - companies don’t go global, people do. Hundreds of his employees staged a “virtual” protest by not signing in to their computers a week after BLM protests erupted in May 2020. This comes in the wake of Facebook not deleting or at least blocking #45’s divisive FB post about the BLM protests. “...when the looting starts, the shooting starts, ” #45 posted in reference to the turmoil between protesters and police in Minneapolis following the murder of George Floyd. Facebook has been struggling with community guidelines since jump. But this is not surprising given the lack of diversity from their senior leadership team. They’ve attempted to roll out a tool that would label state-run media outlets ahead of the 2020 elections to help users make informed opinions. Although this is a bandaid attempt to monitor its platform’s activity, this company needs to admit the cruel roles it plays in other people’s wrongful schemes to game the system. We devote so much of our time and attention to social platforms that were built with little to no emotional intelligence consideration. How can you have a “report button” but no action in place to deal with the reports? Empty laws with no justice. As the BLM movement continues to ripple through the Tech industry, these gatekeepers will be forced to make social justice issues a priority or surrender their positions of power.

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5 Reasons Why Racism is Wrong By: Melissa Henderson Here are 5 reasons why white supremacy is wrong.

1. It’s the opposite of love. At the most basic level, it prevents people from loving one another wholeheartedly. Before 1976, when the Supreme Court decision deemed anti-miscegenation laws unconstitutional, people could only marry each other based on their skin color. Imagine only being able to marry someone based on the color of your skin? Racism is a concept. Not only does racism allow ruin uur society based on skin color, but it also prohibits humanity from thriving and procreating awesome human beings who know how to treat people.

We need to forever celebrate the union of Mildred and Richard Loving as the first interracial couple to challenge the law, and Halle Berry for making it cool.

2. It prevents people from having and giving compassion. It takes a lot of energy to have such hateful feelings towards someone. Race as a concept was invented

by Spanish conquerors around 1492. Before then, skin color was just based on your geographical location of how close you were to the equator. People started procreating when people of all corners of the world started to travel and discover one another. Since the first human was births in Northern Africa, they procreated based on love and survival as they roamed the rest of the world.

3. Trying to be racist in the 21st century will get harder and harder. We’ll move into a world where we’ll be able to accept one another based on merit and respect. Systemic racism will be illegal. Face it, being racist is exhausting. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been racially gaslighted in the workspace, “wow you’re so articulate…” for a black girl is what past colleagues have wanted to say.

4. White supremacy creates harmful laws that encourage violence. Since the 1920s, there have been over 400 attempts to pass anti-lynching legislation, also known as the anti-lynching laws. We need to pass these laws in all 50 states. We need Harriet Tubman on the $20 Bill to remind our society of the value of black lives.

5. White supremacy is a dangerous mindset. It relies on caricatures “invented” by the KKK and Republican party to uphold racial ideologies, privileges, materials, and political power. The more people there are who subscribe to these notions, the most dangerous systemic racism will grow and become prevalent, dividing our community even further from equality.

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Writing Prompt What part of yourself do you guard most closely? Are you able to share it with the people you love? Do you think they are able to drop the guard with you?

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Throwing Shade Bucket Hats By: Violet Summer Shop

Available at www.violet-summer.com

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PARTNER WITH US info@violetsummerzine.com Follow us on social: @VioletSummerZine PO Box 1157, N NY 10037 35

Eliminating Racism in the Medical Field Presented by white coats for black lives UMN chapter

Opening Statement: What brought us together today was the murder of George Floyd by Minneapolis Police. This is far from an isolated event. Police killings have happened for hundreds of years. In fact, many police departments originated as Black slave patrols. When we in the medical field hear the three words “I. Can’t. Breath”, we rush to the patient’s side yet systemic racism, structural oppression, and white supremacy continues to suffocate our Black communities - we must ask ourselves why has the medical community been silent about this.

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Our chapter along with institutions across the country are coming together with their community and colleagues to mobilize against police brutality, antiBlackness, and white supremacy. White Coats 4 Black Lives is not just a tagline or hashtag. Our organization has a “vision, and our actions are grounded on the politics of police and prison abolition, anti-capitalism, and antiimperialism. We explicitly name racism and white supremacy as the root causes of disparities seen in our country. We urge you to familiarize yourself with our common vision to safeguard the lives and well-being of our patients through the elimination of racism.” As such, all White Coats for Black Lives chapters are united in declaring and enacting these three goals.

Goal number 1: End racial discrimination in medicine.

Acknowledge the racist roots of the medical field and call out racism.

There has never been any period in American history where the health of Black Americans was equal to that of White Americans. Health disparities are due to racism, not race. Look around you. The signs people are holding up highlight some of the devastating statistics of health inequities - in our home state of Minnesota and nationally.

Ask yourself: Is this a status quo I can accept?

If you answered no, consider these next steps: “Demand that medical centers serve the healthcare needs of their local communities, particularly the needs of [Black] patients…

- Promote the allocation of funding for 37

interventions that dismantle racism and remove barriers to equitable medical care.

- Vote & organize to ensure quality, equal access to medical care by advocating for the establishment of a single-payer national health insurance program.”

Goal number 2: Prepare future health providers to be advocates for racial justice.

Faculty and students in Minnesota have called for mandatory content on the “history and current manifestations of racism in medicine, the principles of antiracism,” the establishment and strengthening of ties with Black communities in Minnesota, and the denouncement and removal of race-based medicine from our medical curriculum.2 “We must also improve the recruitment, support and hiring of Black, LatinX, and Native American” students and providers into leadership positions.

Goal number 3: Foster dialogue on racism, including police brutality, as a public health crisisWe demand the reallocation of funding from the Minneapolis Police Department to communities; our medical institution must partner with our community to lead health and safety strategies. Most importantly, we must listen to the needs of the Black community and allow them to guide us in the change we advocate for. Ensuring that we are walking hand in hand with 38

our Black patients, and not in front of them. We must call on our peers, Minnesota Department of Health, and all Minnesota medical institutions to publicly recognize racism as a public health crisis and demand that they take actions to address it.

Closing Statement We would like to recognize physicians in the Obstetrics and Gynecology Department at HCMC for initiating this event. We also thank you all for coming today. But, our actions cannot stop here. Medicine is political, so stop weighing the loss of career opportunities over Black lives. “We must move beyond performative protests and hold our health institutions accountable” for their complicity in sanctioning white supremacy and violence against Black bodies.

To the hospital and medical school administrators here today, to the white health care workers here today, to Brown people who benefit from proximity to whiteness I ask you - How have you helped or hindered the work already being done by Black students or workers in your organization?

How can you use the power of your voice and your vote to impact police and prison abolition efforts in your community?

What can you do to make sure that George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, Tony McDade, and David McAtee (I could go on…) did not die in vain? The change we seek is built on their backs and on all the backs of Black people killed by white supremacy in the past 400 years.

What would our community look like if the healthcare leaders amongst us who hold the most power and privilege were making these demands?

Reflect on your implicit biases, behaviors, and actions and how they contribute to health care inequities. We will now take the next hour in silence, to honor Mr. Floyd, and countless other Black lives lost to police brutality before him.

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“My self-care and wellness journey only started a couple years ago after experiencing alot of loss and heartbreak. In my recovery, I discovered I liked the person looking back at me in the mirror and I determined that person had earned the right to shine in all her natural quirky glory.”

What came of this journey was a brand that mirrored her Nigerian roots, culture, and dedication to social good. Not only are the products affordable, they can be customized based on your favorite scent and whatever skin ailment you may be targeting. Learn more about skin oils at www.yateou.com/ USE PROMO CODE: VIOLETSUMMERZINE FOR 30% OFF! 40

Violet Summer Solutions Three alternatives ways of making the world a safer place for our communities: 1. We can use the concept of blockchain to guard our communities and hold each other accountable and elect people of the community to roles that require a cultural understanding of violence.

2. We can eliminate racism and other biases with mandatory social justice classes for all law enforcers that focus on building emotional intelligence and cultivating compassion.

3. We need to demilitarize and de-fund the current state-level police forces that have horrible “benefits” like baking in settlement fees for their racist acts of terror towards citizens they are supposed to be protecting and serving in the first place. The money should be re-directed into community programs and infrastructures that have a lasting effect.

Insights: According to the Urban Institute, “In 2017, state and local governments spent $115 billion on police (4 percent of state and local direct general expenditures) and $79 billion on corrections (3 percent).” Re-allocating budgets on the micro-level, within states, will materialize our demands of defunding the police through technology.

Request the full report at: info@violetsummerzine.com

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Sanity Addiction pt.5 based on a true story We met during our lunch break on my first day at work as a seller at Roosevelt Furniture Warehouse. Till this day, I still don’t know why he was in the stockroom counting inventory on the hottest day of the summer but he was there, collar shirt unbuttoned just enough to show his hairy chest. I ran into this scene trying to find a bathroom in the 25,000 square foot warehouse space in the newer part of Nashville. “Oh hi! My name is Princess. It’s my first day. Hopefully, you can’t tell.” I said approaching him with caution as to not step on anything that would disrupt the chaotic flow of boxes.

“Oh I can tell,” Devon said with a smirk on his face.

“Yea well this place is massive. I’m looking for bathrooms. I don’t even know how I got here quite literally.”

He chuckled meeting my eye. “Johnny, gave you directions?”

“Yes. Why? Is this some freshman orientation ploy I’m not aware of?”

“Sort of. He said.

I don’t remember how long we stood there talking but he brought us back to earth. “I have a client errand in thirty minutes. Gotta go sell the shit out of these lamps to Clydes on Fifth Avenue. They are our top customers.” He was so sure of his masculinity, I just knew he was making mad commission.

“Ah aren’t you going to show me where the bathroom is?” I said in a tone that was only appropriate for a bar conversation.

“Ha! Yes. Just make a right past the fountains and the non-gender ones should be on your left.”

“Thank you, Devon.” I knew I was pushing my luck on the first day of work but can you blame me? This was my first real job outside of the

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family business I worked for over five years prior and I was looking forward to mingling with new co-workers.

When I finally made my way back to the orientation group, I’d been gone for almost 20 minutes but there were only two other people who weren’t paying me any mind. The conference room’s interior design was based on “middle eastern” culture. There must have been a million dollars worth of oriental rugs, layered on refurbished concrete floors. On the walls hung gold encrusted tapestries from popular sitcoms like - The Kardashians, The Osbournes, The Obamas. There was a section with a dark granite counter top that served as a coffee bar to entertain the industry’s top clients, This room was most sentimental to me because of everything it stood for me and Devon’s relationship. In case you’re wondering, Devon is tall, muscular, handsome. He was the male token black guy in a predominantly white workforce. He wore Yeezy and Saint Laurent jeans with blazers and was always precisely on time. When I first met Devon, my gaze fell directly into his deep hazelnut eyes. It was at that moment I was in for myself because I’d never seen anything like him and from the way he ate me up with his own stare, I was in for a rollercoaster.

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Three weeks later, it was during our lunch break when we finally sat down to have an actual conversation. The company ordered a bunch of Italian food but our coworkers were so busy they took their plates on the go and ate in the car. I chose to sit in the glass- enclosed kitchen, which was decorated like an interior design magazine, complete with modern french cabinets, a chef ’s stove and a smart fridge. The 11 foot long marble dining table overlooked the east side of the office. Devon joined me, sitting across from me on a velvet covered bar stool.

“So how’s your first month going?” he said to be biting into a garlic knot.

Where do I begin? I said.

Months later, our playful work relationship ended up going over the line when we slept together on a team work trip to Las Vegas for a trade show. We were both not dating or looking for anything serious. I didn’t know much about Devon other than the fact that everyone loved him at work. He dressed well. He went to some state school I’d never heard of and played the drums in his free time because he invited me and a few colleagues to a gig one afternoon.

3.

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After the conference, we started seeing each other more often. One particular night, my cousin was in town from Baltimore and said that Rell was in town as well.

“Rell!!???” I screamed through the phone. “What is he doing in Nashville?!” I knew he would come looking for me sooner than later.

“He’s out of jail and wanted to come to Nashville to go out, Princess.” “I dunno, I’m not in that man’s mind.” My cousin Felicia was throwing shade.

Rell did his time and he was out for a few months. I heard through the grapevine that he started a business. What I didn’t know was that he had several businesses, an apparel line and also was managing a few artists at the same time. Of course, I thought to myself that the type of guys I’ve managed to attract have always had these bad boy images to fulfill. I met Rell when I was just about becoming a woman. He protected me, as proof of the cash he gave me in a paper bag right before he got locked up. I was hundreds of miles away from him by then. So I thought. Now he was in my city, and I was involved with Devon.

“Girl, we’re gonna meet you out tonight around 8pm. Where are you going to be.” Felicia asked me and I couldn’t duck out on her. I guess Rell and Felicia were going to have to meet Devon.

4.

It was the beginning of the summer when the “squad” got back together That night, I had planned to wear a silk black mini dress with my hair slicked back in a ponytail. I was debating on whether I should throw on some heels or just wear a pair of leather gladiators. I could also just put flip flops in my bag. I’m such a pussy when it comes to wearing heels all night. I ended up wearing strappy sandals from a village market in Nairobi. I told Devon to meet me at my favorite beer garden and he was there when I arrived. Early as usual. Thank god it wasn’t as crowded and there was a DJ. We embraced and immediately sat down close to each other. Even though I hadn;t seen him in awhile, that didn’t stop me. We hesitated to kiss each other since we hooked up in Las Vegas. He was hungry so he ordered food and we both got a pint of whatever was on draft.

“Hey, so my cousin and a friend from back home are gonna meet us here.

They are in town tonight. I wasn’t expect--” continued on p.47

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Spiritual Love Notes By: Alanna Heavenly

Rising above the noise to hear your inner thoughts

What are your thoughts and beliefs, truly? When you disconnect from it all - friends, family, media, your phone, and you are left to face yourself, how do you truly feel?

Things may become quiet. You may become uncomfortable. Good. Keep going.

Beyond the silence is your voice. Your true voice. Your inner voice may seem softer than the thousands you hear when you connect on social media, but I guarantee that it rings the truest and the most authentic for you and the unique circumstances in your life. So what happens when you finally allow your voice to speak to you? Your fears may reveal themselves to you. That’s ok. Keep going. Your anger may rise.

That’s ok. Keep going. Insecurities may pop up. Your inner child may scream with discomfort. Your instinct to reach out to someone to redirect your attention from yourself may appear. That’s ok. Keep going. Keep going until all you feel, hear, know and see is the natural hum of your heartbeat. And all that is left is love.

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SAY THEIR NAMES Lives Lost to Police Brutality Eric Garner John Crawford III Michael Brown Ezell Ford Dante Parker Michelle Cusseaux Laquan McDonald George Mann Tanisha Anderson Aki Gurley Tamir Rice Ruman Brisbon Jerame Reid Matthew Ajibade Frank Smart Natasha McKenna Tony Robinson Anthony Hill Mya Hall Phillip White Eric Harris Walter Scott William Chapman II Alexia Christian Brendon Glenn Victor Manuel LaRosa Jonathan Sanders Freddie Blue Joseph Mann Salvado Ellswood Sandra Bland Albert Joseph Davis Darrius Stewart Billy Ray Davis 46

Samuel Dubose Michael Sabbie Brian Keith Day Christian Taylor Troy Robinson Asshams Pharoah Manley Felix Kumi Keith Harrison McLeod Junior Prosper Lamontez Jones Paterson Brown Dominic Hutchinson Anthony Ashford Alonzo Smith Tyree Crawford India Kager La’Vante Biggs Michael Lee Marshall Jamar Clark Richard Perkins Nathaniel Harris Pickett Benni Lee Tignor Miguel Espinal Michael Noel Kevin Matthews Bettie Jones Quintonio Legrier Keith Childress Jr. Janet Wilson Randy Nelson Antronie Scott Wendell Celestine David Joseph

Calin Roquemore Dyzhawn Perkins Christopher Davis Marco Loud Peter Gaines Torrey Robinson Darius Robinson Kevin Hicks Mary Truxillo Demarcus Semer Willie Tillman Terrill Thomas Sylville Smith Alton Sterling Philando Castile Terrence Crutcher Paul O’Neal Alteria Woods Jordan Edwards Aaron Bailey Ronell Foster Stephon Clark Antwon Rose II Botham Jean Pamela Turner Dominique Clayton Atatiana Jefferson Christopher Whitfield Christopher McCorvey Eric Reason Michael Lorenzo Dean Ahmad Aubrey Breonna Taylor George Floyd

CREDITS COVER PHOTOS Courtesy of: Bellamy Brewster Studios

Violet Summer Social Media Intern: Jasmin Matthews, NYU Class of 2023

Continued from page 44.

“It’s cool, babe.” he said, cutting me off.

I was instantly relieved, but curious to see how these two men would get along. I tried to play it cool.

When I felt my phone buzz and my screen light up on my lap, indicating a new message from Felicia -- It was showtime.

“We outside.” I read the message in my head glancing down to read it. My eyes turn those the grey eyes on the chocolate skin I fell in love with at first site. Then my head turned to survey a figure that appeared at the bar entrance. My past was about to meet my present and I wasn’t even ready for it.

Read the full version on www.violetsumerzine.com.

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