Washington City Paper (Feb. 4, 2022)

NEWS: INFIGHTING DELAYED HOUSING DEVELOPMENT IN ANACOSTIA 4 FOOD: WHY JAPAN IS WOOING LOCAL CHEFS 12 ARTS: MANY QUESTIONS, FEW ANSWERS IN WHITE NOISE 14 THE DISTRICT'S FREE WEEKLY SINCE 1981 VOLUME 42, NO. 2 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEB. 4 – 17, 2022

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THE ANSWERS ISSUE

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P. 6

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Washington City Paper | 1/2 pg V | 4.8542” x 11.25” | 4c | New | 40th Anniversary

TABLE OF CONTENTS COVER STORY 6 The Answers Issue: Readers sent us their probing, provocative, and punchy questions. We answered them.

NEWS 4 Loose Lips: Council Chairman Phil Mendelson takes a victory lap after years of fighting with Mayor Muriel Bowser delayed the rehabilitation of four homes in Anacostia.

SPORTS 5 Triple Threat: Archbishop Carroll High School junior Nyckoles Harbor II is already being compared to world class athletes. The 16-year-old dreams of the Olympics, the NFL, and med school.

FOOD 12 Big On Japan: Japan is courting local chefs at lavish dinners, hoping they’ll cook or connect with more of the country’s cherished ingredients.

ARTS 14 A Southeast Artist by Any Other Nickname: Ronita Overton, aka King Dude Tha Artist, tells about her comeup in Southeast D.C. in a new memoir.

15 That’s Chutzpod! to You: Actor Joshua Malina and Rabbi Shira Stutman dissect Jewish life on a new podcast.

16 Theater: Marloff on White Noise at Studio Theatre

Darrow Montgomery | 4100 block of 7th Street NW (rear), Jan. 31

19 Film: Zilberman on Sundown

Editorial

Advertising and Operations

Interim Editor CAROLINE JONES Managing Editor MITCH RYALS Arts Editor SARAH MARLOFF Food Editor LAURA HAYES Sports Editor KELYN SOONG City Lights Editor ELLA FELDMAN Multimedia Editor WILL WARREN Loose Lips Reporter ALEX KOMA Staff Writer AMBAR CASTILLO Staff Photographer DARROW MONTGOMERY Creative Director NAYION PERKINS Designer KATY BARRETT-ALLEY Audience Growth and Engagement Editor MICHELLE GOLDCHAIN Copy Editor GAIL O’HARA

Publisher and Chief Development Officer DUC LUU Senior Account Executives MARK KULKOSKY, ALICIA MERRITT Account Executive ATHENA FOLTZ Sales Operations Manager HEATHER MCANDREWS Advertising Traffic Director JANE MARTINACHE Publisher Emeritus AMY AUSTIN

CITY LIGHTS 17 City Lights: Consider another case for reparations, watch a son’s letters to his father come to life, take a Galentine’s Day calligraphy class, and get a reality check at Hillyer Gallery.

DIVERSIONS 18 Savage Love 19 Classifieds 20 Crossword

Leland Investment Corp.

Owner MARK D. EIN Director of Finance RACHEL PROCTOR

LOCAL ADVERTISING: (832) 878-9567 FAX: (202) 650-6970 ADS@WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FIND A STAFF DIRECTORY WITH CONTACT INFORMATION AT WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM VOL. 42, NO. 2 FEB. 4-17 2022 WASHINGTON CITY PAPER IS PUBLISHED EVERY WEEK AND IS LOCATED AT 734 15TH ST. NW, SUITE 400, WASHINGTON, D.C. 20005. CALENDAR SUBMISSIONS ARE WELCOMED; THEY MUST BE RECEIVED 10 DAYS BEFORE PUBLICATION. U.S. SUBSCRIPTIONS ARE AVAILABLE FOR $250 PER YEAR. ISSUE WILL ARRIVE SEVERAL DAYS AFTER PUBLICATION. BACK ISSUES OF THE PAST FIVE WEEKS ARE AVAILABLE AT THE OFFICE FOR $1 ($5 FOR OLDER ISSUES). BACK ISSUES ARE AVAILABLE BY MAIL FOR $5. MAKE CHECKS PAYABLE TO WASHINGTON CITY PAPER OR CALL FOR MORE OPTIONS. © 2022 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. NO PART OF THIS PUBLICATION MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN PERMISSION OF THE EDITOR.

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Rehab Rumble

Darrow Montgomery/File

NEWS LOOSE LIPS

After years of infighting, four Anacostia homes will be livable again. Is this a development model that works?

By Alex Koma @AlexKomaWCP

House on Valley Place SE circa 2017 Courtesy of the L'Enfant Trust

Nearly five years ago, four dilapidated, abandoned homes in Anacostia were stuck in a tug-of-war between Mayor Muriel Bowser and the D.C. Council. But these days, the city-owned properties are housing families again for the first time in decades.

It took years of bureaucratic battles, fundraising, and construction, but the nonprofit the L’Enfant Trust has finally sold off two of the homes and now has a third on the market. It’s an outcome that might have once seemed unthinkable for neighbors who have been urging the District to do something—anything—with the historic homes for the better part of the past 20 years. And it’s a bit of a win for Council Chairman Phil Mendelson. He believes it’s a clear example of how the city could better use its own land to house people, and how it often fails to do so.

“My only regret is that the city has done nothing to scale this program to [include] more houses,” Mendelson says. “These houses are no longer vacant and blighted, and we’re getting taxes on these properties from families who live in them.”

Mendelson was the driving force in engineering the transfer of these four properties to the trust, which agreed to renovate the homes using private funds and make them available to homebuyers of more modest means, an approach that Bowser fought tooth and nail. She tried instead to award the project through a more traditional solicitation and picked the Development Corporation of Columbia Heights to manage the process in defiance of Council legislation favoring the trust, specifically.

But that deal fell apart in no small measure due to Mendelson’s resistance (he used budget language to block Bowser from spending affordable housing funds on the homes, among other maneuvers). Over the administration’s frequent objections, he insisted that the Council had the authority to hand the properties over directly to the trust. As much as anything, it became a fight about who has power over land in the city, and how local leaders can put vacant properties to productive use as they address D.C.’s housing crisis.

“We just got caught in the arm wrestling between the Council and the mayor’s office,” says Lauren McHale, the trust’s president and

Rehabbed house on Valley Place SE in Anacostia

CEO. Bowser relented and handed the homes over in 2018, and after three years of work, the first property (at 1518 W St. SE) sold last February for $410,000. The trust found a buyer for 1326 Valley Pl. SE by September (for $649,000) and nearly closed on a deal for 1648 U St. SE before negotiations fell through at the last minute, McHale says. She hopes to start work on the fourth and final home, at 1220 Maple View Pl. SE, once the trust can finish fundraising to meet a projected $2 million price tag.

McHale says the three other properties weren’t quite that expensive—the group budgeted

4 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

$500,000 for each one, though she says costs have reached up to $730,000, depending on the house in question. But, in general, McHale stresses that the trust is “taking a huge hit on these properties” financially, considering they come with affordability requirements. The Council’s legislation stipulates that buyers can make no more than 120 percent of the area median income (about $154,000 for a family of four) but McHale says the trust has so far sold to people earning much less than that.

That’s not a model that can work for most developers, even those handling affordable projects, who often count on market-rate units

helping to offset the costs of affordable apartments. But in this case the land, often the most expensive part of any development play, came completely free of charge. McHale says her organization also scored a low interest loan from the preservation-focused 1772 Foundation, with the $1.5 million investment seeding their efforts. It helps, too, that the trust earns a steady (if modest) income stream from managing easements on historic properties throughout the rest of the city.

“We’re able to take this money that we’re raising largely in Northwest and put it into Southeast,” she says. “And we’re doing this to keep these affordably priced and make sure existing residents have a chance of acquiring these. …

We don’t want to go in and change Anacostia. We don’t want to push anybody out.”

But could this really be a model elsewhere, as Mendelson hopes? It’s quite far from being a comprehensive solution to the city’s housing woes, but it could be a small way to make a difference, particularly when it comes to affordable homeownership (a frequent point of emphasis for Bowser and lawmakers alike).

The city’s Department of Housing and Community Development controls plenty of other vacant homes and lots that could be handed over to similar nonprofits: up to 150 as of 2016.

A spokesman for the agency said it doesn’t currently control other properties that are in quite the same situation as the Anacostia homes, but it’s safe to assume there are plenty of promising opportunities, especially in neighborhoods like Anacostia that are finally starting to see more development (and higher prices as a result).

“I would like to think that DHCD has learned from this,” Mendelson said. “But I see no evidence of that so far.”

A DHCD spokesman said the agency works “every day to transform vacant and blighted property into affordable housing opportunities for our residents,” but also said that “DHCD has not been engaged by the L’Enfant Trust regarding other properties.” Mendelson believes the agency should be doing that engagement proactively, but he was unsure of any methods he could use to force officials to do so.

McHale says she sympathizes with the agency, to an extent. She suspects officials didn’t take action in Anacostia for so long because they knew how expensive the process would be, considering the homes are in a historic district and therefore come with complex standards for rehabilitation.

And there are certainly many other demands on the agency’s attention (and its dollars) when it comes to affordable housing issues in the city.

But that isn’t an excuse for inaction. McHale says the District could easily have chipped in a small amount of funding to help the Anacostia project get off the ground (had it not gotten stuck in the turf war between the legislature and the executive) and there’s no reason it couldn’t do so elsewhere. Ditto for other foundations focused on these issues, she says, considering that most of the trust’s support has so far come from out of state.

“We’re the developers of last resort on properties like these,” McHale says. “There’s a reason other developers aren’t clamoring for these buildings. … It takes a lot of time and a lot of money.”

SPORTS Jamison Michael

Triple Threat

says that Harbor will voluntarily repeat a repetition during a track workout if he doesn’t hit the prescribed time.

Asked where, at 16, he gets his ambition and motivation, Harbor laughs and says: “I hang around a lot of old heads, a lot of old people. I sit in the garage with my uncles and they talk, drink beers. They give me sodas. We just talking … and having a good time watching football ... And they just basically tell me they’re proud and they just want me to do all this. They want me to live my dream.”

That dream involves not just the NFL, but Olympic track as well. Harbor loves both sports and doesn’t think it makes sense to limit himself to just one. Plus, he says, being busy keeps him out of trouble—or even the perception of trouble. There can be consequences, Harbor believes, when that’s not the case.

“With my athletic ability, I’m blessed to do two sports at a very high level,” he says. “So with me doing both, it just makes it better for me and my family, because I’m always into something … I’m not out in the streets … I can keep myself occupied.”

High school junior Nyckoles Harbor II is a five-star football recruit, runs a 20.79-second 200 meters, and has a 4.5 GPA.

By Kelyn Soong @KelynSoong A sk a n yone cl ose to Nyckole s Harbor II for athletes he should be compared to, and they’ll likely respond with a list that includes some of the most accomplished pro sports stars of all time: Usain Bolt. Deion Sanders. LeBron James. Even Bo Jackson, the first professional athlete in history to be an all-star in both the National Football League and Major League Baseball.

“He’s Bo Jackson,” says Rafiu Bakare, the head track and field coach at Archbishop Carroll High School. “That’s what I talk to my friends about: This is Bo ... When he walks in the room, you know what it is. ... There’s a presence that permeates the place.”

Bakare isn’t referring to an Olympian or NFL player, but rather a 16-year-old junior at Carroll.

It may seem like over-the-top praise, but that’s how much potential Harbor’s coaches and supporters see in him as a track athlete, football player, and student. They envision a not-so-distant future where he is an Olympic medal contender in track and a top NFL prospect.

Harbor isn’t fazed by the comparisons and predictions. He welcomes it—especially after his most recent accomplishment. Last month at the Texas Tech Under Armour High School Classic track and field competition in Lubbock, Texas, Harbor ran the 200-meter dash in 20.79 seconds—a personal best and the fourth-fastest indoor 200-meter dash ever by a high schooler.

His 100-meter personal best of 10.31 seconds is also an elite mark for runners his age.

“I’m a showman, so I like to give people a show,” Harbor says. “That’s what I do.”

And if everything goes to plan, this is just the beginning of Harbor’s journey to the grandest of sports stages. In addition to being one of the fastest high school sprinters in the country, Harbor is a 6-foot-6, 220-pound five-star football recruit with more than 40 college offers from programs like the University of Alabama and Clemson University. He intends to compete in both track and football in college, run at the Paris 2024 Summer Olympics, and then play in the NFL. Few professional athletes have

Nyckoles Harbor II

ever excelled at both sports at the highest level.

“This kid is really an anomaly,” says Robert Harris, Carroll’s head football coach. “In 27 years of coaching some great players and guys that went on to play great Division I football and went on to the NFL, I’ve never seen or had an athlete like this before.”

Pamela Crockett immediately called her sister after track practice ended. She needed to tell her about the 8-year-old boy that had just joined the Full Speed Athletics youth track club, based out of Prince George’s County, that she coaches.

“He’s going to be incredible,” Crockett remembers telling her sister, Tracy, a former track and field standout at the University of Virginia. “He’s probably going to be the best sprinter to come from this area.”

It didn’t matter that Harbor had yet to run in a single competition. Crockett saw in him a natural talent and desire to improve that made her think, What am I witnessing?

Track wasn’t Harbor’s first sport, and he wasn’t even supposed to be in Crockett’s group.

Born in D.C. and raised in Largo, Harbor first played football when his parents signed him up for a local summer camp at age 8. Whenever he scored a touchdown, Harbor would experience severe asthma, so his youth football coach for the Patuxent Rhinos suggested that he run track to improve his breathing. Harbor’s parents attempted to enroll their son in a track club at the same sports complex as the youth football team, but the roster was full and the club wasn’t accepting more kids. Harbor was devastated.

“That was the worst day of my life,” he says.

“I was crying.”

But, by a stroke of fate, Harbor later ran into one of his friends from the football team who informed him about Crockett’s team. His parents gave the coach a call, and Harbor has been with Full Speed Athletics, a youth track club for kids ages 6 to 18, ever since.

Harbor also tried basketball and soccer as a young kid, but never gravitated toward either sport. “He couldn’t understand the concept that you’re supposed to pass the ball in basketball,” Harbor’s mother, Saundra Bobbitt-Harbor, says. His father, Azuka Jean Harbor, is a Nigerian American who competed for the U.S. men’s national soccer team and several professional clubs in the U.S. and Nigeria during a career that spanned multiple decades. It didn’t take long for Azuka to realize that his son would not be following in his footsteps.

“I looked at him, and I said, ‘You’re too tall.

You can’t play no soccer,’” the 6-foot-1 Azuka says with a laugh. “That’s how that conversation went. I just looked at him; he doesn’t have the coordination.”

Azuka adds that while he takes plenty of pride in his son’s athletic accomplishments, he’s long emphasized an academics-first approach. “I always say to him, ‘I want other people to remember you as a good student,’” Azuka says. Nyckoles has taken that directive to heart. He has a 4.5 grade point average at Carroll and has dreams of becoming a nurse and eventually attending medical school.

Harbor’s determination in any field is something that his coaches have noticed. He was not a starter on the varsity football team his freshman year at Carroll, but has, within two seasons, established himself as one of the best football players in the area. Harbor plays tight end, receiver, outside linebacker, and defensive end, and also competes on special teams. “We may hand him the ball out of the backfield next year,” Harris, the football coach, says.

Harris describes Harbor as a “fierce competitor” who doesn’t like to lose. “He is his biggest critic, and pushes himself,” he says. There are times, Harris recalls, when Harbor will get upset with himself if he doesn’t complete a tackle the way he wants. It’s the same energy he brings to the classroom. “He doesn’t want a B-plus,” Harris says. Crockett can attest. She

Harbor’s deep, gravelly voice belies his young age and playful nature. The sun has set and the track at Carroll is barely visible by the time practice is over on a recent January evening. The team is preparing for the Millrose Games at the Armory in New York City, and the runners get ready to head inside the school away from the freezing temperatures, when Harbor jumps on the back of Carroll’s assistant track and field coach, Victor Blackett, for a piggyback ride.

Blackett carries Harbor—all 6-foot-6 and 220-pounds of him—around, before the two get into a debate of who is taller. (“If he’s 6-6, then I’m 6-6 and 1/8th,” Blackett says.)

The word “generation” comes up often in conversations about Harbor. Crockett says that he “has the ability to be one of those true once in multiple generation athletes.” Bakare calls Harbor “one of those one-in-a-million kids” for his athletic skills and academic achievements. Harris, a former math teacher, puts the probability of him being a professional athlete in track, football, or both at “99.998 percent.”

But Harbor is still a kid in many ways. After running a 20.79-second 200 meters at Texas Tech, he says “about 30 people” came up to him for photos and selfies. It was a new experience, and he didn’t sign any autographs because, well, he doesn’t have one yet. “I gotta learn that,” he says. Although he is considered a celebrity on campus, he doesn’t see himself that way. “He’ll walk in a room and light it up, but he makes everyone comfortable,” Harris says.

So perhaps, with so much ahead, the best comparison for Harbor right now is simply himself.

“It sets a ceiling sometimes, when you make comparisons,” Blackett says. “If we create our own lane and create our own tower, the stars become our limit versus what did such-andsuch do? And then you’re trying to match what that person did. So if I had to compare him to anyone, I’ll compare him to the next Nyckoles Harbor, so he can set his own ceiling.”

WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEBRUARY 4, 2022 5

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THE ANSWERS ISSUE After more than 40 years of reporting on D.C., you’d think that Washington City Paper would know the answer to most inquiries our readers may have about life in and around the District.

But D.C. is ever changing, and so are our readers, meaning questions will naturally arise. And so, once again, we’ve arrived at the Answers Issue, our annual attempt to figure out these conundrums that vex Washingtonians.

Of the dozens of questions readers submitted this year, some yielded easy, though not widely known, answers, while others proved more complicated. Our writers worked the phones, sent countless emails, rifled through pages of public records, and scrolled incessantly through the social media accounts of a former elected official to bring you this information. They even managed to discover an unclaimed land that might be in D.C. or might be in Arlington, depending on how you interpret maps and ZIP codes.

Settle in and prepare to learn more about D.C.’s weird and wonderful ways. Maybe reading these questions will prompt questions of your own. Jot them down—there’s always next year.

— Caroline Jones

Photographs by Darrow Montgomery 6 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

Why don’t wards 3 and 7 have a 3A/7A ANC?

Does D.C. have any unique borders or enclaves/exclaves? It is interesting that Theodore Roosevelt Island and National Airport are still within the District.

ANC 3A and 7A used to exist in wards 3 and 7, respectively, but they are no more. “It bothers a lot of people,” says Gottlieb Simon, former longtime director of the Office of Advisory Neighborhood Commissions. So what happened?

There’s a story for each: ANC 3A used to encompass Georgetown. Yes, Georgetown used to be in Ward 3 until after the 1980 census, when redistricting shifted most of the neighborhood to Ward 2. Only a tiny fraction, known as the Shackleton Sliver after former Ward 3 Councilmember Polly Shackleton, remained in Ward 3 so as not to redistrict the Georgetown resident out of a job. When Georgetown (and therefore ANC 3A) became part of Ward 2, officials were faced with the question of what to do with the other commissions. If 3B becomes 3A, then 3C would become 3B, and 3D has to become 3C. It gets confusing quickly.

“It was much simpler to drop the A from the list,” Simon says. “Most of the time nobody notices. Life is fine, and we manage to go on living that way.”

As for ANC 7A, which includes Fort Dupont, Benning HeightsSimple City, Fort Chaplin, Woodlawn-Payne Cemetery, Fort Mahan Park, and D.C. General and the DC Jail—we now call that 7F. Simon says about 10 years ago when D.C. redrew ward and ANC boundaries, some folks in ANC 7A were concerned about the reputation the commission had earned and thought it would help to rebrand. The redistricting committee didn’t object, and so the commission reemerged with a new name.

“And that, children, is why there’s no longer a 3A and a 7A,” Simon says.

—Mitch Ryals

Believe it or not, the airport is its own jurisdiction. National is technically not part of D.C. proper, and even though it’s across the Potomac River and adjacent to Arlington, it’s not part of the city or the county. This is, at least, according to Rob Yingling, a spokesperson at Metropolitan Washington Airports Authority.

“It’s like another Arlington or Alexandria except with no residents and no elected officials,” says Yingling in an interview with City Paper. “It has its own police department, its own fire department, its own building codes, and other types of services you would normally affiliate with a city.”

Despite this, the airport doesn’t collect taxes (of course) or have its own ZIP code. The U.S. Postal Service, Yingling says, incorporated the airport into the 20001 ZIP code.

This is reflected in the address of 1 Aviation Circle on the airport’s official website alongside the location, which is curiously specified as Washington, D.C. A quick Google search, though, indicates that the airport is located in Arlington, at the 22202 ZIP code, and this same information is shared on the airport’s official Facebook page. No wonder there’s so much confusion.

—Michelle Goldchain

What happened at Channel 4 sports?

Are local station sportscasters no longer a thing?

Regular viewers of NBC4 have likely

noticed that the station has not employed a full-time sports anchor since Sherree Burruss left the station in December 2019 for CBS Sports.

(Cary Chow and Dave Johnson were technically NBC4 freelancers, not salaried employees; Chow is now working in corporate communications, and Johnson continues as the sports director for WTOP, in addition to his work as a play-by-play radio voice.)

After Burruss left, NBC4 had begun interviewing candidates to replace her when the pandemic arrived and sports events shut down, according to Matt Glassman, the assistant news director for NBC4.

NBC4’s website currently does not list a full-time sports anchor that works solely for the station.

(Moisés Linares is listed as a sports anchor for Noticiero Telemundo 44 on NBC4’s sister station, Telemundo 44/WZDC, and contributes to NBC4 News.) FOX 5 also does not have any dedicated sports anchors.

Darren M. Haynes is the sports director/anchor and Sharla McBride is a sports and news anchor for WUSA9. Scott Abraham and Olivia Garvey handle on-air sports coverage for ABC7.

“I would say that the pandemic was the catalyst,” Glassman says about the changes in how sports is covered at NBC4. “What it’s done is it’s given us the opportunity to

try some new things and to experiment in a different way. … Nothing that we’re doing right now is necessarily a long-term play.”

NBC4 also has been using reporters and hosts from NBC Sports Washington on its broadcasts. Both stations are located in the same building. Glassman adds that NBC4 still has an off-air, behind-thescenes sports staff, and says the station is “absolutely not” ruling out bringing back a full-time sports anchor. “We’re always evaluating what we need and who we need and all that kind of stuff,” he says.

—Kelyn Soong

The best poke in D.C. is at Tiki Taco near Dupont Circle, right?

All those make your own Chipotle-style places are bullshit poke, right?

There are a host of build-a-bowl poke places throughout the D.C. region, among them Poke Papa, Poki DC, and Poke Dojo, that allow customers to

WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEBRUARY 4, 2022 7

pile on toppings such as cucumbers, crab salad, cilantro, pickled ginger, and edamame. Are they bullshit? I’d like to offer an analogy. Some sushi rolls you find in the U.S. are filled with ingredients such as cream cheese, mango, and jalapeños and drizzled with sweet and spicy sauces. When I taught English in a small town in Japan, I showed my students what counts as sushi in the U.S., and watched their jaws drop. Sushi in Japan is far more austere, often to showcase the quality of the fish. Poke in Hawaii, which is excellent even in grocery stores, takes a similarly simplistic approach. Ahi tuna is cubed, tossed in soy sauce and sesame oil, and mixed with whatever’s on hand: raw onion, chopped nuts, or a special kind of seaweed. Tiki Taco adopts this more traditional approach, as does native Hawaiian-owned Abunai Poke.

I sampled them both in January and slightly preferred Abunai Poke for its freshness and flavor. Abunai owner Akina Harada would likely agree with the question asker that some of the Chipotle-style poke places don’t cut it. She has playfully dissed them in the past. Shortly after Poki DC moved in nearby, she plastered stickers that read “Aloha, it’s POKE, not POKI!” on customers’ meals. As with traditional and Americanized sushi, both styles of poke can be delicious.

—Laura Hayes

Economic Club of Washington, D.C., breakfast last October.

Evans’ ’gram also features pictures from Nantucket, at Caps games with Ted Leonsis and Jack Davies, and shots of him having an absolute ball putting his feet up while sitting in some pretty choice seats near the dugout at Nationals Park.

In one particularly tantalizing post on Facebook last fall, Evans posed alongside a salad and Bill Regardie, founder of the defunct Regardie’s magazine.

“Great stories and discussing future plans,” Evans captioned the photo. The receipt on the table appears to read “CRIME CRIME CRIME” and “Jack Evans 2024.” Prepare yourselves. —MR

What is D.C. shorts etiquette? It seems like some folks (hipsters, the fashionconscious) never wear them.

Is there also a demographic element? Age? Race? Are they just for White dudes?

(Athletic shorts are excluded from this analysis.)

Jack Evans committed multiple ethics violations and voters renounced him at the polls, yet based on his Instagram he is warmly embraced by D.C.’s business leaders.

Do they have no shame?

It’s not just the business community lacking shame! In Evans’ post-Council life, he’s become somewhat of a low-key influencer. He hasn’t brought dad jeans, boat shoes, and ten-gallon hats back in style (yet), but scroll through Evans’ Insta and you’ll see a Georgetown socialite who scarcely misses an opportunity to break out his tux and yuck it up with old pals or see the new James Bond movie.

Mayor Muriel Bowser makes regular appearances on Evans’ feed: at the RAMMYS, the Restaurant Association of Metropolitan

Washington’s annual awards gala; standing by his side at a gathering marking the anniversary of the March on Washington; and at her birthday celebration, along with Prince George’s County Executive Angela Alsobrooks.

Council Chairman Phil Mendelson

8 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

has also taken several opportunities to pose with his old pal, like at the D.C. Chamber of Commerce’s annual gala (along with former Councilmember Michael Brown). As did Sen. Joe Manchin and Bowser advisor Beverly Perry, who are seen cheesin’ with Evans at the

Fashion is subjective, so I spoke with two local stylists: Ting Lin and (my friend) Michelle Barsa. Shorts “can be done if done right, and at the right time,” says Lin, who started a fashion consulting business four years ago.

That means wearing them in warmer months. “Then people will get it: It’s not like, ‘Oh that person made a fashionable choice. Maybe they’re just hot,” says Lin. “It’s really important to distinguish the ‘D’ in the ‘DMV’ here,” Barsa adds. “Shorts are a totally different fashion phenomena once we leave the District.” Within city limits, Barsa argues shorts norms can be distinguished by neighborhood: “In Capitol Hill, anyone should feel free to wear their khaki shorts, particularly if they’re embroidered with some sort of oversize Atlantic sea animal.” In upper Northwest, there’s an abundance of “shorts with a purpose” (think cargo), and in Bloomingdale and Shaw, where D.C.’s alleged hipsters congregate, shorts “may be fine here, particularly if they’re worn ironically and/or with tights and

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BLACK HISTORY MONTH DC Water celebrates the heroes of Black History, who have championed equality and fought for a better future for all Americans. In this spirit, and under the leadership of CEO David Gadis, the Authority is leading the push towards water equity, both regionally and nationally.

DC Water employees deliver equity for our community through the LeadFree DC program, which will eliminate lead service lines within the District by 2030 and expanded customer assistance programs that keep more families connected to water services during a financial hardship. We deliver equity to our employees through inclusion programs and a diverse, world-class management team reflective of the employees they lead and communities they serve. We deliver economic equity through our apprenticeship programs and ensuring small, local, and disadvantaged businesses can compete for contracts with the Authority.

DC Water draws inspiration from the heroes of Black History and is committed to advancing equity within the Authority and across the water sector.

“To realize equality, we must first deliver equity.”

WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEBRUARY 4, 2022 9

fines for more valuable stolen items. —Ambar Castillo

Some of the weed and mushroom “gift” suppliers also have DMT. Is basically anything giftable now in DC?

boots,” says Barsa.

Lin says race doesn’t come into play much (but notes that a lot of White guys wear shorts to brunch).

Barsa adds that Black people follow an unwritten rule: “If your legs be ashy, DO NOT wear shorts no matter how damn hot it is.” Age often plays a role in what type of shorts people are wearing. The younger crowd can be a bit more adventurous, Lin says, while older folks typically wear longer shorts in more subtle colors and patterns.

As for the idea that “more fashion-conscious people never wear shorts,” Lin calls bullshit: The fashion-conscious “can do a lot with shorts. They know how to outfit them. And it’s all about outfitting.” In short, shoes matter. “If you’re doing shorts and sandals, you’re really Cali,” says Lin. “Or Florida.” —Sarah Marloff

Has the Metropolitan Police Department ever apprehended and brought charges against a porch pirate and what were the legal consequences, if any? Are all the theft videos just pointless?

MPD data on arrests doesn’t have a “porch pirate” subclassification under its “Theft” category, so it’s tough to distinguish thefts of packages outside residents’ homes from burglaries and other types of theft, according to an MPD communications staffer.

But D.C. has experienced a rise in

10 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

package thefts during the pandemic and most recently around the holidays, according to resident reports and surveillance video.

Despite the unclear data on porch piracy versus other types of theft, we do know MPD has apprehended pirates. D.C. residents might recall MPD’s #ReturningChristmasJoy Twitter campaign in 2018 after officers arrested a man carting off 13 packages that weren’t his, then returned the packages to their rightful owners. On May 10, 2021, MPD arrested Sterling McGlaughlin, 28, of Northeast D.C. with charges of six counts of “Theft Two” for stealing unattended packages from residences in Northeast and Southeast, according to an MPD statement. In the District, these porch pirates can get slapped with fines of up to $1,000 if the item is worth less than that amount, and larger

Well, sure, pretty much anything can be giftable. But is it all legal? That’s a different question.

Adam Eidinger, the proposer of Initiative 71 and co-founder of DC Marijuana Justice, tells City Paper that the District is “one of the safest spaces” for substances such as DMT because it’s “not a priority.”

This is thanks to Initiative 81, which passed in November of 2020, making entheogens, such as psilocybin, among the lowest law enforcement priorities for the Metropolitan Police Department. But just because it’s a lower priority, that doesn’t mean that it’s legalized.

When it comes to cannabis, District voters passed Initiative 71 in November of 2014, legalizing the recreational use of cannabis, but a rider Maryland Rep. Andy Harris introduced has blocked the city from legalizing and taxing the sale of recreational cannabis ever since.

Currently, the only legal way D.C. residents who are 21 and over can acquire cannabis is by first getting a physician recommendation for medical cannabis, then completing an application through the Alcoholic Beverage Regulation Administration for a physical medical cannabis card, and thereafter visiting any of the approved dispensaries in the city. Those who are not D.C. residents can purchase from D.C.’s dispensaries if their jurisdiction has been extended reciprocity.

For those who want to remove all the aforementioned steps and the many fees that come with them, gifting is always an option. Even so, the legal limit for gifting cannabis is a maximum of one ounce per person. Even under Initiative 71, it still remains a crime to receive money, goods, or services for any amount of cannabis.

Gifting in D.C. has long been scru-

tinized by members of the public and especially government leaders. According to Eidinger, though, those who buy cannabis and other substances “have nothing to worry about … It’s the seller that has to be concerned in the District of Columbia.”

But is basically anything giftable now in D.C.? It depends on who you’re asking and if they happen to be wearing the color blue. —MG

Has anyone in D.C. actually been fined for not shoveling snow from their sidewalk?

Yes, if businesses count. As of Jan. 28, seven commercial businesses have received citations, at $150 a pop, for not keeping their portions of the sidewalks snow-free and accessible to foot traffic this season. Additionally, two residences have received snow-shoveling warnings, according to Nancee Lyons of the Department of Public Works, the city agency tasked with enforcing sidewalk shoveling. If those warnings turn into citations, the fine for residents who fail to shovel is $25. —SM

Which charter school executive made the most bank at the expense of resources going to traditional public schools?

In search of an answer, City Paper scoured the most recently available 990 tax forms for as many charter schools as we could get our hands on—no thanks to the D.C. Public Charter School Board, which publishes 990s on its website but hasn’t updated the records since 2019.

Instead, we relied on ProPublica’s database of nonprofit tax records.

Most schools’ forms were easily accessible, but some proved too elusive. In any case, the documents we reviewed reveal that at least 20 schools pay their top executives more than $200,000 a year. For context, Mayor Muriel Bowser’s annual salary is $220,000, Chancellor Lewis Ferebee makes $280,000 per year, and Christina Grant, state superintendent of education, makes $202,363 per year.

The last time City Paper examined charter school pay, Carlos Rosario International Public Charter School’s CEO Allison Kokkoros was the highest paid charter school leader, earning a whopping $541,000 in compensation in 2017.

For the 2019-2020 school year (the most recent information available), Kokkoros was knocked off the top spot but remains in the top five.

The highest earning charter school leaders are: Patricia Brantley, CEO of Friendship Public Charter School, who made $390,645; Linda Moore, founder of Elsie Whitlow Stokes Community Freedom Public Charter School, who made $382,276; Susan Schaeffler, founder and CEO of KIPP DC, who made $341,216; Kokkoros, who made $319,430; and Joe Smith, CEO of Eagle Academy Public Charter School, who made $299,218. —MR

Who started the myth that D.C. was built on a swamp?

Hot and humid D.C. summers along with the incestous, swampy corruption among the political class that meets here makes this myth difficult to resist. But it is, indeed, a myth, according to DC History Center historian Jane F. Levey. It’s one of her favorite topics.

“It’s a question of language,” Levey says. “So if you say, ‘Wash-

“I don’t think anybody has ever been able to come up with patient zero on the myth,” she says. “It’s just not a possibility. And that’s because it’s such a complicated discussion of how the language was used.” —KS

ington was built on a swamp,’ period, end of thought, that’s a total myth. If you want to be more specific about it, yes, there were a lot of springs and creeks and marshes here in the territory that was chosen for Washington. But that was because ... at the beginning, you needed water in an era when you didn’t have plumbing and pipes and running water the way we do today. So that was a good thing that was going to support the city. And then it became, in the 20th century, a political canard. And it’s been thrown in our face ever since.”

But as to who started the myth, that’s a lot more difficult to answer. Back in the 1800s, people used the word “swamp” and “marsh” pretty much interchangeably, according to Levey.

On Channel 4 News, one anchor has a yellow script/notes, and the other has pink. Why those colors? It’s often one male and one female anchor, but it’s not pink and blue. It couldn’t be green because of the greenscreen weather map.

Eun Yang anchors News4 Today at NBC4, where she recently celebrated 20 years of employment. She explains that the two scripts need to be different colors so the anchors know which stack to grab if the teleprompter goes down, but the colors don’t matter. “Some anchors do prefer a color, whether it’s tradition, habit, or superstition,” she says, likening the situation to preferring blue pens or black pens. “Personally, I don’t care what color a production assistant hands me. It depends on what paper is available and what the PA can load into the printer at that time.” —LH

WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEBRUARY 4, 2022 11

FOOD YOUNG & HUNGRY Nicolas Castro

Big On Japan Japan is courting local chefs, hoping they will cook or connect with more of the country’s cherished ingredients.

By Laura Hayes @LauraHayesDC There are no paying customers inside Sushi Taro on Nov. 15, but some of D.C.’s top chefs are huddled in the back room pouring themselves sake as they revel in a rare night off. Chef Nobu Yamazaki is in a festive mood while preparing rice dishes that have never appeared on the restaurant’s menu for his peers. It’s a Japanophile’s dream.

One of the masters of ceremony takes the microphone to explain how rice is ingrained in Japanese society. Until 150 years ago, some Japanese people still used it as currency. “Japanese rice is very important for Japanese people because it’s a staple food,” Counselor Tatsumasa Miyata says, greeting the chefs. He works as a food and agriculture specialist for the Embassy of Japan. “That’s why they’re interested in exporting it all over the world.

It’s a kind of Japanese pride similar to American beef. American beef is very sacred for American people.”

Yamazaki is tasked with showcasing the versatility of rice and he delivers. The chef smushes cooked rice onto a sturdy chopstick, forming a cylinder and grilling it until the outside has a slight char. Then he slides the rice roll off the chopstick, slices it into bite-size pieces, and floats them in a chicken soup. Later, Yamazaki wows the chefs by cooking rice over an open fire inside a girthy bamboo stalk like his family used to do while camping in Japan. “Somehow it makes it so much better tasting than if you use a $1,000 rice cooker because of the open air and aroma from the fire,” he says.

The technique left a lasting impression on Reverie Chef Johnny Spero. “That inspired a dish we do on the menu now,” he says. Spero easily acquires koshihikari rice from Japan, but finds American bamboo too narrow so he subs in coconut. He fills the shells with rice and coconut water and buries them in the embers of his Japanesestyle charcoal grill. The finished product is an aromatic rice pudding. “I literally put it on the menu two days after the event because I was obsessed,” he says.

Over the past year, Japan, through the Embassy of Japan and the Japan External Trade Organization, has attempted to woo local chefs into working with more Japanese ingredients.

They have held events centered around rice, wagyu beef, and shōchū. Engaging chefs during the pandemic was easier because they theoretically had more time on their hands.

Miyata says the official purpose is cultural exchange. “We don’t push people to buy more

Japanese wagyu brisket at Reverie

Japanese ingredients,” he says. “We can’t go to Japan right now, so under the pandemic, it’s a kind of soft power thing. It’s very important in terms of friendship between two nations.”

When you consider how Japanese cuisine is practically synonymous with Japanese culture, it makes sense. But increasing exports couldn’t hurt.

There’s a movement to sell more Japanese agricultural products overseas. The country’s birth rate continues to plummet and a shrinking population means fewer mouths to feed.

“It’s a win-win atmosphere because Japanese farmers are very pleased if U.S. people purchase a lot of Japanese ingredients,” Miyata says. “I would like U.S. people to feel a piece of Japanese culture and maybe apply our Japanese ingredients to the American style.”

D.C. is an ideal place to concentrate their efforts, not only because the embassy is here. “It’s one of the biggest cities in the U.S. and also the capital,” Miyata explains. “Lots of Americans from the countryside and all over America come to Washington, D.C. That’s why it’s a kind of window of opportunity to sell Japanese ingredients.”

12 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

The escape of partying at embassies and sampling food from around the world is one of the perks of living in the District and a fun facet of the local culinary landscape. It’s difficult to measure whether embassy crawls and the like leave any lasting impressions.

“It used to be that promoting any product was just having a bunch of guests at the embassy,” Yamazaki says. “When you have a sake tasting, people just drink and nothing follows after that.”

The chef strategy, by comparison, has more potential for incremental impact because each restaurant has different clientele.

“You have to basically show the ingredients to the people who have influence, and those are the chefs,” says Daisuke Utagawa, who has been part of one of D.C.’s first Japanese restaurants since 1983. The original location of Sushiko in Glover Park closed, but the one in Chevy Chase is open. He’s also part of The Daikaya Group. “You can have your embassy functions all you want and invite the regular crowd of people like the diplomatic corps, but that’s not going to move any needles,” he says.

Utagawa takes some of the credit for the fresh approach and has been involved in organizing some of the chef dinners. He thinks it would behoove Japan to try new tricks for selling their products abroad. To succeed, he says, Japan must make its cherished ingredients relevant to chefs who don’t cook at Japanese restaurants. “If you go to an Italian restaurant and they have a nice grilled yellowtail collar in an interesting sauce, suddenly that jump is made,” he says. “It’s relevant to the diner. Now they look at it as a universal ingredient, not a specialty thing.”

Takahiro Hiraishi helped coordinate the rice dinner and has produced videos about Japanese ingredients and chef collaborations for the embassy’s YouTube channel and new Premium Japanese Ingredients website. He works for a consulting firm and also distributes kombu, an edible seaweed.

He also encouraged the embassy to target chefs, even if results won’t be felt overnight. “Michelin chefs or James Beard chefs—through their influence or their cooking techniques—can appeal to the end user, the consumer,” Hiraishi says. “We can’t expect a quick result.”

Before rice, the embassy and JETRO focused on promoting wagyu in the D.C. area. Japanese beef is prized for its marbled fat and richness. The country grades its beef in terms of quality, yield, and marbling, and provides those who purchase it with certificates describing its merits.

The product is so expensive that prime cuts typically only find their way onto tasting menus at fine dining restaurants a few ounces at a time.

At Xiquet, you can upgrade a beef course to three ounces of A5 Kagoshima wagyu, at the high end of the grading spectrum, for $45 per person.

Kagoshima is one prefecture in Japan known for its wagyu. Hyogo is another. That’s where the city of Kobe is located. “Kobe beef is very popular in the United States because of Kobe Bryant,” Miyata says. “There are some Americans who think Japanese wagyu beef is Kobe beef. If we can have an event in Washington, D.C., we can help them revise their thoughts.”

An impressive cast of chefs and restaurateurs sat down to dinner at Reverie on Oct. 25 to sample Japanese wagyu, including Nicholas Stefanelli of Masseria, Pepe Moncayo of Cranes, Rose Previte of Maydan, Danny Lledó of Xiquet, Eric Ziebold of Kinship and Metier, and Aaron Silverman of Pineapple & Pearls, Little Pearl, and Rose’s Luxury. Together they hold 10 Michelin stars.

“The quality of what the Japanese produce is fantastic,” Moncayo says. “The only challenge they’re going to face [promoting it] is prices are going up for everything.” The wagyu that consistently appears on Cranes’ menu is from Ovoka Farm in Paris, Virginia. By crossbreeding a Japanese wagyu bull with an Angus heifer, American wagyu beef was born. Ovoka breeds and raises cross- and full-blood wagyu.

Instead of pitching a room full of chefs on pricey pieces of Japanese wagyu, event organizers smartly saddled Spero with showing off two lesser cuts from the same special cow—chuck roll and brisket. “Chuck roll isn’t a dirty word, but it doesn’t sound like words from a high-end tasting menu,” Spero says. “When you slice into it, you see the webbing and fat. It was stunning. We cut it open and everyone was like, ‘We’re not making

FOOD YOUNG & HUNGRY burgers out of that, are we?’”

Spero roasted it like prime rib for six hours after rubbing it with miso paste to form a crust. Then he finished it on the grill before serving it with raw shaved chestnuts and almond cream. It practically melted, tasting no less decadent than a slice of New York strip.

“Johnny did a really great job of showing it off with minimal manipulation or preparation to the meat,” says Reid Shilling, the executive chef and owner of Shilling Canning Company.

“The closer you get to the hoof or the horn on a cow, the tougher the cut of meat is going to be. The most desirable parts are from the middle section because those do the least amount of work. To have these two items presented in such a way that were straight roasted and very tender was definitely a shift in viewing how and what you can do with these cuts of meat.”

Just as local chefs became more familiar with Japanese wagyu and sought more affordable cuts to cook, Japan started focusing on moving the whole animal and increasing its beef exports overall, according to Javier Arze, who owns Lortonbased wholesaler Huntsman Specialty Game & More.

He was at the Reverie dinner and says a strip or rib eye of Japanese wagyu can run $85 to $200 per pound, depending on the product. The super-rare sanuki variety of cattle, for example, eats a diet that includes the by-product of the olive oil making process and will blow most people’s budgets.

Japanese wagyu chuck or brisket, by comparison, runs $45 to $65 per pound. He carries both and saw an uptick in orders after the dinner, even if not every chef was the target audience.

Shilling has no clue how he wound up on the invite list because his restaurant specializes in food sourced from the Mid-Atlantic. Still, he was impressed. “There are two ways to market a product,” he says. “You either put it in the chef’s mouth or in their hands. You’re going to have to give it away in order to get people to see its viability and this is a good way to do it rather than sending everyone a 10-pound hunk of whatever so they can play with it themselves. … If you butter them up with a few glasses of wine and sit them down at the table, you have their attention. It certainly got mine.”

Lledó was also happy to be invited, even though he already offers Japanese A5 wagyu as a supplement on his menu. “I wish the government of Spain would do this,” says the paella master. “It would make my life easier in terms of getting some products over here.”

The embassy took another clever approach when promoting Honkaku shōchū and awamori at an Aug. 30 dinner at the ambassador’s Old Residence. The distilled spirits aren’t as well known as sake. Instead of pairing a selection of them with Japanese cuisine, the dinner featured continental cuisine. The goal was to convince a handful of guests that the beverages can have wide appeal.

Most shōchū is produced in southern Japan on

the island of Kyushu. It can be made from barley, buckwheat, rice, and sweet potato. Some carry strong, sweet aromas while others are more neutral, like vodka. Awamori comes from Okinawa and is mostly made from long grain rice. You can drink both spirits neat, on ice, or in cocktails.

Attendees included wine writers and educators, who, like chefs, can play a role in increasing Japan’s sphere of influence. The embassy invited Stephen Lyman and Christopher Pellegrini, hosts of the Japan Distilled podcast, to help educate people about shōchū and awamori. Will Witherow, the beverage director of Elo’s Italian in Alexandria, was also on the guest list.

“I was lucky enough to sit across from Chris and we had a good conversation about shōchū and how many different styles there are,” Witherow says. “I loved that there’s a funk to it.” He told Pellegrini that he makes a sweet potato and sage cocktail that would work beautifully with shōchū.

So far he hasn’t purchased any, even though he thinks shōchū might eventually sell at nonJapanese bars.

Japan needs to up its game if it wants bartenders to start using shōchū in a big way, Witherow advises. Tequila Herradura once brought him to their distillery in Mexico so he would connect more with the product and have fodder for customers. “People are fascinated by what bartenders talk about,” he says. He’d like to visit the Furusawa Distillery founded in the Miyazaki prefecture in 1892. It’s currently run by the fifth

generation of a family and transports you back in time. Participants at the dinner sampled their Motoko shōchū.

While Witherow may not stock shōchū anytime soon, within just a couple hours around a table with experts, he was able to grasp precisely what makes Japanese products direct expressions of the Japanese culture of mastery. “We’re promoting artisan culture,” Hiraishi says. “Two or three generations are focused on one product.” Yamazaki adds: “Japanese love making things better. They love improving things.”

Japan cut itself off from the world during part of the Edo period from about 1603 to 1868. Utagawa argues that when the country isolated itself, its ideas incubated for a long time, allowing the country “to develop wonderful things and eventually bring them to the world.”

He thinks Japan will focus on exporting more fruits and vegetables, such as sweet snow cabbage, next. After farmers in the Hokkaido prefecture harvest it, they age the cabbage under a blanket of soft snow until spring. “You haven’t eaten cabbage until you’ve eaten this cabbage,” Utagawa says.

“The Japanese have a lot going for themselves, but don’t know how to communicate what they have to outsiders,” Utagawa says. “They didn’t have to before because they couldn’t export. Now they’re saying, ‘How do we do it?’ They have to do it methodically and properly because you only get a first impression once.”

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ARTS BOOKS

A Southeast Artist by Any Other Nickname Michael Kirby Jr.

Author, rapper, and entrepreneur Ronita Overton shares her come-up story to inspire others

By Ambar Castillo @ambaReports For many, the freshman year of high school marks an awkward era of becoming, gauged, in part, by whether you can earn your own nickname outside family lines. By the time she entered Capitol Hill’s Eastern Senior High School in 1992, Ronita Overton had earned four. Overton’s pandemic creations—her first book, Sometimes the King is a Woman, and her first single, “Champagne Me Please”—demonstrate how names have the power to shape and reinforce identity. But there’s also the whispered question: What comes first—name or identity?

Overton grew up in Southeast D.C.—a place where “either you’re gonna make it or it’s gonna break you”—in the ’80s and ’90s, she tells City Paper. She served in the U.S. Army from 1996 to 2000. Most recently, she worked in property management before authoring her first book last year on surviving the streets of D.C. She had long wanted to do for others what authors of success stories had done for her: help them realize what was possible even for someone from Congress Park, even for someone whose family was rattled by the crack epidemic. But she was haunted by feelings of insufficiency. Then, on President’s Day 2020, a car crash left Overton severely injured and severely reevaluating her past and future.

“I felt like I hadn’t done enough … hadn’t accomplished enough,” Overton says. “Then I had that car accident. [It] put the mirror up to your face to say, ‘Hey, you’ve done a whole lot.

And you’ve overcome, there’s a whole lot, and somebody out here like you … Your situation could help them.’”

As close as Overton was to her family, both biological and chosen, there were parts of her they would never know unless she wrote them.

So she did. Likewise, it’s her come-up story that influences her music.

Overton’s father figure during the chaos of D.C.’s “crack years,” as she desribes the ’80s in her book, gifted her the nickname “Dumb Dora,” a term of endearment he wrapped in irony. It taught 10-year-old Overton not to care what others thought of her. It was also a nickname she won through wits, absorbing nuggets from adults who wielded them and following instincts on who to trust in a revolving home life.

In the summer of 1989, an eviction separated 12-year-old Overton from her mother and moved her onto a couch in a family friend’s Congress Park apartment. “Rocky” Overton survived Southeast D.C. during its “murder capital”

Ronita Overton years by embodying the fictional boxer. The nickname was given to her by the neighborhood guys known as the Congress Heights Crew after she socked one of them in the mouth for shoving her. She wasn’t going to take it, new girl on the Park or not.

When Overton started at Eliot Junior High School that fall, her own girls’ crew, the selfproclaimed ninth-grade “Honeys”—who she calls the most popular group of girls in middle school—knighted her “Dude.” She didn’t fall in love with the moniker, but it solidified during a school basketball game when fans chanted it over and over during Dude’s victory. In the simple name she began to see another fictional legend, this time one that embodied cool instead of struggle: The Fonz.

Like the Happy Days character, Overton had always revered mother figures, starting with her matriarch grandmother “Big Liz,” who taught her to “take no wooden nickels” (aka bullshit), and a “CEO” mother who schooled her family about sticking together. Not unlike the Fonz, Overton coached little-brother figures in street smarts; she also holds a soft spot for sweet rides, like her old 2000 Porsche 911 Carrera. And she was both a wingperson and the life of the party.

“Dude gave me an identity,” says Overton.

“It’s like I know everybody: ‘We’re having a party? Let me invite Dude. Dude gonna know all the chicks.’ … And it’s still like that now.”

Even when “Ra” stuck as a nickname in high school, Overton kept “Dude” close. When Overton left a six-figure corporate job in government property management in March 2020 to freelance, write, and record music, King

14 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

Dude Tha Artist became her rapper name.

Leaving a toxic workplace that acted as a boys’ club with alleged racist practices and employers who resisted her work-health boundaries while she was recovering from a car crash, Overton dug even deeper into her roots: storytelling about life in Southeast—Dude and all. Her song, “Champagne Me Please,” released in July 2021, reinforces not just a rapper’s braggadocio but the bastion of becoming: “What’s my motherfucking name? I’m Dude/ Collar popped like the Fonz … I’m cool!”

Keisha Stanley, a close friend from high school who Overton endearingly called a “nerd,” remembers Overton embodied these nickname associations—even if Stanley refrained from calling her friend “Dude.” Overton, who she simply called Ronita, was voted loudest in their class.

“So imagine, a quiet girl just coming to school, when you see this person in the hall, loud, and she’s greeting everybody,” Stanley says. “She was posted up. So we met each other because every day I would just see her and her energy— she has always been a ball of energy.”

Stanley wouldn’t realize until years later that Overton was often homeless during high school. It was hard to see tough times reflecting off her friend’s Versace or Tom Ford shades while Overton lived life as loud as her voice. Stanley laughs over memories of Overton posing as a 25-year-old “Bahamas Jerry” on their senior trip to the nation of the same name, or simply making an entrance.

“She’s the person that shows up in the middle of winter with sunglasses on and you can’t tell her that she isn’t the coolest person in the building,”

Stanley says.

Underlying Overton’s loudness was a steady beat of grounded goals. She would share her dreams of foreign cars, lifelong excursions, and early retirement with Stanley while both girls swapped success stories of Black people who had made it out of the hood. (For Overton, Jay-Z was, and remains, king.)

This storytelling was the crux of their friendship, so, unlike some other friends and acquaintances of Overton’s, Stanley wasn’t surprised when Overton told her she was planning to pen a memoir. Stanley quickly introduced her two cousins, who happen to be published authors, to Overton and also helped her find a public relations representative.

The rapping was a different story. Her childhood friend couldn’t have imagined the ensuing professional studio setup, the production featuring a kaleidoscope of Havana hats and pastel suits, a canary yellow bicycle, layers of gold chains, and Champagne-pouring that made for a hit music video. (“I’m like, ‘We’re too old to be rapping, what are you doing?’” Stanley says, chuckling.)

But Overton says she doesn’t expect to be the next superstar rapper. Her music is about bringing her Fonz meets Southeast style, and if that manages to affect even one person that’ll be a win. And that goal may already have been achieved: When she visits her family, her nieces, who are 6 and 4, serenade her with “Champagne Me Please.”

“I don’t care about anybody else,” Overton says. “Because these two people, who I love more than anything else, have already said that I’m a star in their eyes.”

ARTS BOOKS

That’s Chutzpod! to You A wisecracking podcast from actor Joshua Malina and Sixth & I founding Rabbi Shira Stutman on Jewish faith tradition

Ronita Overton one day began experimenting with Overton’s pronouns. It was a teaching moment for Stanley, who explained to her daughter that physical presentation doesn’t define the person. “[Ronita] doesn’t hide who she is, and that matters,” she says.

Already, Overton has outlined the sequel to her memoir, but wants to take a beat before delving in. She describes her first book as “really heavy,” so a recovery period is needed.

“A lot of things that I had overcome, that I had suppressed, that I had graduated from, I had to revisit it, relive it, and I’m still reliving this kind of haunting,” Overton says. “It’s haunting. It’s therapeutic. And it’s like, wow, you went through all that. But then it’s like, damn, bam, you went through all that. We forget we went through all that, so it’s almost traumatic.”

At the same time, Overton isn’t above being real about the uncertainty of her path. As an army veteran turned corporate manager turned author-rapper-entrepreneur at 43, her trajectory hasn’t exactly been linear. While working on her music, which includes dropping an EP this spring, Overton is set to collaborate with the Office of Neighborhood Engagement and Safety to teach Congress Park youth about arts and entertainment for a year. But she isn’t ruling out a return to corporate life.

As much as she likes wearing a Washington Wizards cap and Adidas hoodie while chilling at Ben’s Chili Bowl on U Street—or filming one of her regular inspo Facebook videos in the car— Overton also enjoys Versace, Hugo Boss, and Salvatore Ferragamo. There’s a reason her book cover shows her in a black and gold tuxedo jacket sitting atop a throne-like white and gold chair in front of her old Congress Park Plaza home.

“I’m an entrepreneur, but if the price is right, I might go back,” she says. “You got a certain type of lifestyle that is different—that champagne life … you know? It’s different.”

Ronita Overton’s Sometimes the King is a Woman can be purchased online at ronitaoverton.com.

Asking Joshua Malina to concoct a clever name for a podcast is a dangerous proposition.

The actor, of The West Wing and Scandal fame, is known for his pun penchant (pun-chant?)— and when Sixth & I Historic Synagogue founding Rabbi Shira Stutman approached him about starting a new show dissecting Jewish life, they spitballed a long list of possible titles.

There was Two Jews, Three Opinions, as well as Small Portions, which references both the weekly Torah portion and a Jewish proclivity for overindulgent meals, A Quest Called Tribe, a takeoff on the hip-hop group premised on the religion’s identity as a “tribe,” and Podcast of the Elders of Zion, an admittedly distasteful send-up of the antisemitic 20th-century tract of a similar name.

But the odd couple ultimately landed on Chutzpod! for their weekly show distributed by PRX, the public media organization that distributes This American Life, The Moth Radio Hour, and others. Together, they decided to focus on both current events and ancient texts, all through a Jewish lens.

“It went from what we thought was a cute and clever name for a podcast to being sort of our rallying cry, which is that we want to push ourselves to go to uncomfortable areas, with chutzpah—with brashness and with boldness,” Malina tells City Paper.

The duo first met at a Sixth & I event in June 2016, and then again on a trip to Israel and the Palestinian territories through Encounter, an educational organization designed to foster challenging conversations to pursue a resolution to the Israeli Palestinian conflict that respects all parties. There, on a sweaty tour bus in 2017, they built their easygoing and inviting rapport.

So when Stutman decided to leave Sixth & I after more than a decade of service as its founding rabbi, and was looking for a new project, she turned to her new friend, Malina, already a seasoned podcaster with a long-running show dissecting West Wing episodes.

Chutzpod!, which launched on Jan. 7 and drops new episodes each Friday, centers on questions of Jewish faith and tradition—like what it means to be the “other,” or how to connect to prayer—all amid wisecracks, Yiddish tutorials, guided meditations, and surprise drop-bys from Malina’s Rolodex of celebrity colleagues.

“Both of us approach this with a posture of curiosity,” Stutman says. “We are growing into chavruta [the rabbinic tradition of learning in partnership] in the best sense.”

She adds, “Neither of us take ourselves too seriously … we try not to take even Judaism too seriously.”

With that in mind, the show is intended for

Courtesy of PRX

By Josh Axelrod Contributing writer

Joshua Malina

Alba Tull

Michael Kirby Jr.

“Champagne Me Please” is itself a creature of its name, borne out of Overton’s turn of phrase while requesting her drink of choice at a photo shoot for her book. Amid bottle-popping, Overton walked up to her assistant “homegirl” and asked her to “Champagne me, please.” Her camera person followed, then other attendees.

The request sounded like music to her hip-hop loving ears. Overton immediately started planning her lyrics. While she had never written a rap song before, she had a lifelong penchant for speaking in rhymes and busting out in catchphrases such as “make your next move your best move.”

Her uncle J.J., with whom she grew up, always had a “slick” way of speaking, she describes in her memoir, hitting folks with phrases like “talk to me quick” or “hittin’ and stickin’ like Popeye’s Chicken.”

The song’s lyrics are code for more than the bougie lifestyle. They are about defying societal expectations of what different people should and shouldn’t have.

“The norm says that, because I’m an African American … I shouldn’t even be thinking about getting [a Porsche],” Overton says. “I want everything they say I can’t have … I go everywhere I want to go, I buy what I want to buy. And there’s nothing [they] can do about it. Financial freedom provides you that.”

Champagne, she says, also speaks to toasting major milestones: the birth of a baby, marriage, starting a new business, buying a house.

The celebration is more radical still when you’ve overcome systemic setbacks—such as working in a White male-dominated field as a Black gay woman without a college degree—and continue toasting to “life after the pain,” Overton explains.

“Society doesn’t expect Black people to be happy,” she says. “They expect oppression [for] us.”

Overton has been physically assaulted multiple times for being a masculine-presenting woman, she notes, showing a scar on her left cheek. She has harnessed her survival skills from the streets and her time in the military: staying aware of her surroundings, adapting to the situation, and not leaving home without a pocket knife.

“That might seem strange to you … but that’s my last form of protection,” she says. “People that don’t like gay people, they might want to engage with me. And if I don’t respond the right way to them, it could be a confrontation. So I have my knife and I got PTSD … I had a corporate job, I took [my knife] to work. Because I come from a place that things could change very quickly at any time, and you gotta be prepared.”

In Sometimes the King is a Woman, Overton shares stories of her sexual encounters with men as a young teen, passages that reflect her commitment to honesty. Stanley recalls being shocked about Overton’s relationships with men when she read the book; she didn’t know that part of her friend’s life. For Overton, it’s important for people to understand that the path of coming into one’s sexuality and self-learning may be more labyrinthine than straight.

Overton has been patient with others who are learning who she is and has inadvertently educated her friends’ families, Stanley says. One of Stanley’s daughters, who watched Overton become more masculine-presenting over time,

ARTS PODCAST

Shira Stutman

listeners of all stripes, from the deeply devout to the Jew-curious.

“That’s how wide a net we’re looking to cast— anyone who considers themselves a Jew might get something out of it,” Malina says. “And anyone who considers themselves a questioner or a searcher or a spiritual person of any faith and even somebody who has no faith might find the topics we discuss interesting or provocative.”

The show represents a new stage in both hosts’ careers. Stutman, once named one of America’s most inspiring rabbis, left her home synagogue in 2021 and intends to write a book about interfaith couples, a topic long known as her pastoral calling card in the D.C. Jewish community.

Malina, on the other hand, enjoys a reputation as a recognizable character actor, reliably popping up on shows such as The Big Bang Theory and Shameless. But, after starting his surprise hit recap podcast, West Wing Weekly, in 2016, he’s found his interest piqued by podcasting and leaning further in to revealing his authentic self.

“When you’re an actor, it’s good to have a side grind, because there’s a lot of downtime, at least in my career there has been,” Malina says. “But it’s funny—I really enjoy this, and I have had the thought recently, maybe this is what I do now. It’s weird to dedicate your professional life to pretending to be other people, and then going public with who I am. It’s a very different challenge.”

While the hosts hail from vastly different fields and upbringings, they offer an open-minded approach to questions of the day, maintaining more accessibility than the myriad Jewish podcasts that dive deep into scripture, but more depth than iTunes’ top Jewish-themed show, Unorthodox, which is more concerned with cultural issues.

“I do think what Josh and I are able to do is help people understand [that] Judaism is relevant, is meaningful, can add value to your life,” Stutman says.

“We encourage anybody who has the slightest interest—it doesn’t matter if it’s because you took a class with the rabbi or you like Scandal,” adds Malina. “We don’t care what brings you in, give it a taste and see what you think.”

Chutzpod! with Rabbi Shira Stutman and Joshua Malina, drops new episodes every Friday. chutzpod.com.

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Sarah Marloff @sarahmarloff

Margot Schulman

Suzan-Lori Parks’ White Noise raises plenty of questions but offers no answers.

The program for Studio Theatre’s production of White Noise aptly sets the tone for the two and half hours awaiting audiences in the tightly packed playhouse. Studio’s artistic director David Muse writes in the welcoming: “Suzan-Lori [Parks] has long used theatre to provoke rather than to comfort, and this play is no exception.”

To call White Noise provocative is to undersell ever since. The release notes that the playwright it. To give it a trigger warning might be to under- believes 2021 audiences “will be ready to engage score it. White Noise is certainly the type of play in a more direct conversation about racism, freethat takes time to process. As Muse goes on to dom, and violence.” Parks is quoted: “Everyone note, it’s a big ask for art-starved, social-life-long- is pushed in the play. To take a good look at their ing, and good-news-needing audiences. “But shit and figure out a way to work through it.” there are things going on in our country and in Over the course of nearly three hours, Parks our lives that demand attention, and artists like examines the interaction of race and gender Suzan-Lori are inviting us into discomfort, in as each character has a specific response to the the name of honesty, self-awareness, and, ulti- play’s events. The resulting conflicts are typical mately, healing,” Muse concludes. “male” and “female” responses: The girls get The play opens in a messy bedroom with Leo in a fight over wine and subtle racism, while the monologuing about growing up as an urban Black guys laugh, high five, and brush aside the tenboy with insomnia. Today, he’s a college gradu- sions until the joke has gone entirely too far and ate, gun-shooting artist living in an even bigger the racism becomes overt. Leo and Misha—and city. He still suffers from insomnia. Played by RJ Dawn and Ralph—are interesting and opposite Brown, Leo artfully sells the lost and hopeful foils to one another, but (aside from Dawn) are 20-something mindset and lifestyle. He’s brim- they all too exaggerated to relate to? ming with the invincibility that bookends a quarWithout offering spoilers, Parks’ play, directed ter-life crisis.

by Reginald L. Douglas (now Mosaic Theater His friends, a tight four-person group, carry Company’s artistic director), raises a bevy of the same bright-eyed hope. Misha (Tatiana questions.From the benign: The foursome is supWilliams), who is also Black, is now dating trust- posed to be in their 30s, but they feel younger, funded, “righteous Ralph” (Quinn Franzen), rawer—like 20-something millennials (even if who’s White. Dawn (Katie Kleiger), also millennials are no longer in their 20s). To the White, is dating Leo, but she and Ralph dated more pressing: Who is the intended audience for in college, as did Misha and Leo. It’s a post- White Noise? And what effect does playing these Trayvon Martin, Tamir Rice, George Floyd characters have on the actors? world (though none are mentioned), and these Certainly, White Noise offers a rebuttal to anyyoung adults, with much to prove, are “woke.” one who parrots the belief that “slavery was so Of course, life isn’t that simple and neither long ago,” and its explosive ending pulls you to are people. A horrible incident throws the the edge of your seat. The point, it seems, of the friends and lovers into a new world that’s too play isn’t to walk out of the theater with answers, reminiscent of ours to be satire. but questions.

While the play takes place in various settings— It’s unclear if anyone figures out a way to work Leo and Dawn’s bedroom, Ralph’s living room, through these questions. Despite being extreme Misha’s parents’ house—the only place they in its decision-making, the play should cause gather as a group is a local shooting range. The audiences, especially White audiences, to feel errant hang-out spot is a place for the friends to deeply uncomfortable—not unrelatable. Though let off steam while building tension for the audi- White Noise pushes beyond micro- and macroence—there’s nothing like the perpetual sound of aggressions, I urge audience members to not use Over gunshots, fired into the seating area, to keep you its over-the-topness as an excuse to write off the readers engaged with what’s290,000 happening on stage. (It’s uncomfortable thoughts and images. Instead of especiallyattended jarring after a cinematographer was insisting “I would never!,” White Noise ought to Theater, Symphony or Opera* killed on a movie set in October by a live round inspire audiences to sit with the many feelings, from a prop gun.) no matter how unsettling, as they arise.

When the play originally premiered in 2019, the group’s hangout was a bowling alley, but White Noise, directed by Reginald L. Douglas and according to a Studio Theatre press release, written by Suzan-Lori Parks, plays at Studio Theatre Parks has been contemplating the locale change through Feb. 20. Studiotheatre.org. $50–$95.

CITY LIGHTS Feb. 6

Through Feb. 13

Feb. 15

Since City Paper alum Ta-Nehisi Coates’ groundbreaking essay on the topic, the proposal for reparations for U.S. slavery has moved from the margins of political debate to center stage. Some presidential candidates announced their support for the proposal during 2020 debates, and scholars such as William A . Darit y Jr. have outlined in recent years how, not just why, reparations shou ld be distrib uted to Black Americans for chattel slavery. Reconsidering Reparations, a new book advancing a different case for reparations, has joined the fray. Written by Olúfémi O. Táíwò, an assistant professor of philosophy at Georgetown University, the book anchors its conception of reparations with climate change and distributive justice in mind. Táíwò argues that reparations should be targeted toward building a better social order. Slavery and colonialism are directly tied to our presentday climate crisis, he says, and reparations should be organized with those issues in mind. He argues that reparations should be an act of self-determination for people in the present and the future, rather than just a Band-Aid for wrongs committed in the past. “What reparations is for me on the constructive view, is the achievement of a target—building the just world,” Táíwò explains in an interview with podcast For the Wild. “The distribution of benefits and burdens in that construction project.” The author will unpack exactly what that could look like in a Politics and Prose virtual discussion with Brandon Hogan, an associate professor of philosophy at Howard University. The virtual talk starts at 5 p.m. on Feb. 6. politics-prose.com. Free.

—Kaila Philo

There are some things Psalmayene 24 wishes he had shared with his father, but couldn’t: being among the few Black kids in his school’s mostly White gifted and talented program; the way his life was suddenly disrupted the first time he was called a racial slur; the night he met his future wife. Some are stories that fathers and sons rarely share, even if they’re both still Psalmayene24 alive. Some are humorous, slice-of-life anecdotes we tell to avoid sharing more intimate stories. Dear Mapel is local playwright and performer Psalmayene’s epistolary play of letters to his late and estranged father, Mapel.

Psalmayene is a playwright-in-residence at Mosaic Theater Company, and, in November 2020, the theater presented a virtual workshop on the piece due to the pandemic. “We were experimenting with the digital form of storytelling,” says Psalmayene. More than a year later, the playwright is bringing Dear Mapel to a real-life stage as a full-length production (a streaming option will also be available). Although the tradition of spoken word as memoir was the story’s starting point, Psalmayene decided to go beyond those constraints with his choice of collaborators. Joining him onstage is percussionist Jabari Exum, while behind the scenes is director Natsu Onoda Power, who has incorporated animation, illustrations, and tactile art objects into the show. “Natsu brings a certain gift of making certain ideas visually manifest, [while] my own style is rooted in an elemental starkness. It keeps me on my toes and brings a certain whimsy and levity,” says Psalmayene. For the playwright, working on Dear Mapel has been cathartic. “One can heal and build a relationship with someone who is not around—it is a creative act.” Mosaic Theater Company’s Dear Mapel runs through Feb. 13 at Atlas Performing Arts Center, 1333 H St. NE. The show also runs virtually. mosaictheater.org. $20–$70. Proof of vax and masks required for in-person viewing.

–Ian Thal

Looking to celebrate the holiday of love, but missing a date?

A decade ago, Parks an d Rec rea t i on’s Leslie Knope gave us the perfect reason to do just that: Galentine’s Day, a day that falls around Valentine’s and is dedicated to celebrating the love you have for your pals.

Ta k ing af ter t he Pawnee legend, Sip and Script instructor Shannon Ho will teach a Galentine’s Calligraphy from Sip and Script Day calligraphy class for beginners at La Cosecha near Union Market. Although the event is meant to be a general introduction to modern calligraphy, in the spirit of the holiday, Ho will be incorporating Valentine’s and Galentine’s themed paper into her lesson, giving attendees the chance to surprise their friends and lovers with homemade cards. Afterward, students will be able to take a beginner’s calligraphy kit—complete with two nibs, a black ink pot, two letter guides, tracing paper, and a straight pen holder—home with them. But that’s not all. “You’re walking away with a skill that you can use for the rest of your life,” Ho says. She designed the class to be an approachable introduction to the world of calligraphy. “I hope to inspire people to not be scared to try something new and really unlock creative potential,” Ho says. “I think a lot of people are really intimidated by calligraphy. I hear often that people think you have to be artistic, or that you have to have good handwriting, or that left-handers can’t do it. But none of those are true.

Anyone can do it—it’s just a matter of starting.” The class begins at 6:30 p.m. on Feb. 15 at La Cosecha, 1280 4th St. NE. sipandscript. com. $75. Proof of vax and masks required. —Hannah Docter-Loeb

Galentine’s Day Calligraphy Courtesy of Shannon Ho

Dear Mapel Courtesy of Mosaic Theater Company

Courtesy of Politics and Prose

Reconsidering Reparations

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Through Feb. 27

DIVERSIONS SAVAGE LOVE

“Our Weight”

by Anna U Davis

Anna U Davis

Reality Check: The Work of Anna U Davis

You’re in a large group of people, and someone says something distasteful. You decide to stay quiet, figuring someone else will speak up.

This common, sociopsychological phenomenon, known as diffusion of responsibility, is the inspiration for Swedish-born Anna U Davis’s latest exhibit, Reality Check, at Hillyer Gallery.

Throughout the exhibit’s paintings, Davis evokes diffusion of responsibility in the context of social dilemmas, particularly gender inequality, racial discrimination, and climate change. Like her other work, Reality Check features Davis’ signature abstract gray-toned figures, which she calls “Frocasians.” With a name that combines “Afro” and “Caucasian,” these figures are intentionally colorless and meant to represent people in a way that transcends race. In her latest work, she represents these figures in a diverse array of materials—including paper, acrylic paint, and fabric—to create mixed-media pieces that convey the ways in which humans often fail to intervene when something is wrong. Reality Check is meant to inspire audiences to check themselves and reflect on how they may be standing in the way of equity and justice. “Everybody can be part of the diffusion of responsibility,” Davis says. “I wanted to evoke the thought process [so that] people are going to think about, ‘How can we recognize when that’s happening, and what can we do about it?’” To Davis, this process of looking inward is important for tangible societal change.

“We have to start with ourselves to start to correct,” she said. “I want people to question themselves as an individual, what they can do, and how they can take accountability. If we all do that as a group, we can change. But it starts with one.” Reality Check is on display through Feb. 27 at IA&A at Hillyer, 9 Hillyer Ct. NW. An opening reception starts at 6 p.m. on Feb. 4. athillyer.org.

Free–$8. Proof of vax and masks required.

—Hannah Docter-Loeb

Longtime reader here, first-time writer. I’m a bisexual woman. I’ve been married to a straight man for eight years. Our marriage and our sex life are amazing. We communicate well, and we have a lot of fun together. You probably think you know where this is going, Dan, but trust me, this isn’t your typical bisexual-person-married-to-astraight-person problem.

Here’s the thing: I would call myself a heteroromantic bisexual. I love men. I love dick and I love having sex with men. Men turn me on. And I have always been interested in men romantically. I’ve also always been into women, but only sexually. I can’t picture myself dating a woman, or being married to one, but I’ve never been able to get off from straight sex or straight porn. When I orgasm, I am either watching lesbian porn or gay male porn or I’m thinking about it. I am turned on by my husband. I find him attractive, and the idea of having sex with him gets me wet. But when it comes time to get off, I go into my head and think about two women or two men. If I don’t do this, I can’t orgasm!

I’ve always been this way. My husband is satisfied, I’m getting off, and we both enjoy sex together. So, what’s the problem? I don’t want to have to leave the moment to get off! I want to be able to get off while being fully present! I feel like I’m losing out on a ton of intimacy with my husband by not being in the moment with him while I’m trying to come. I want to come from straight sex!

Do you think there is a way I can achieve this? Is it fucked up that I have to think about something else to orgasm when I’m with a man? Help me! I haven’t told my husband this because it would crush me to learn he had to “dip out” to get off.

—Being In Moment In Straight Sex Is No-Go P.S. I fully explored the possibility of being a lesbian but I’m sure I’m not. I really, really like men.

I like men a lot. I couldn’t live without them.

There’s a solution here, BIMISSING, one that would allow you to remain in the moment without sacrificing your orgasms.

Let’s zoom out for a quick second, BIMISSING. First, let’s put your problem into perspective. You’re married to a man you love, you have a great sex life, and you’re getting off.

You’re winning. And you’re not the only person with this … well, I don’t wanna call it a “problem,” BIMISSING, because for some people fantasizing during partnered sex—the kind of dipping out you describe—is a solution. Lots of people need to imagine a particular scenario and/or particular cast of characters to get themselves the point of “orgasmic inevitability,” to use one of my favorite phrases from sexresearch literature, and if entertaining go-to fantasies during partnered sex is the thing that gets them to that point, they shouldn’t hesitate to entertain those fantasies. In other words, BIMISSING, while I want to offer you a fix, I don’t want you—or anyone like you—to think you’re broken. Or fucked up. Because you’re not.

Now, here’s the simple, easy, obvious fix—the sex hack—that’ll keep you in the moment without derailing your orgasms: dirty talk.

A quick review of my tips for dirty talk beginners: Tell ’em what you’re going to do (“I’m going to fuck the shit out of you”), tell ’em what you’re doing (“I’m fucking the shit out of you”), tell ’em

18 FEBRUARY 4, 2022 WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM

what you did (“I fucked the shit out of you”). You can also ask someone what they’re going to do, what they’re doing, and what they did.

Now, if you’re already doing that kind of dirty talk, BIMISSING, great. If you’re not, start.

Then, once you’ve mastered Gonna, Doing, Did (GDD) basics, you need to start mixing your basic GDD dirty talk together with dirty talk about your go-to fantasies.

But before you can do that, BIMISSING, you are going to have to level with your husband about these fantasies and your reliance on them. Telling your husband that you’ve always had to think about gay sex to get to the point of orgasmic inevitability—while emphasizing that he makes your pussy wet, and you love having sex with him—is definitely a risk. He could have a bad reaction. If he has a problem with it, BIMISSING, tell him you’re like a woman who can’t come from vaginal intercourse alone, aka, most women, only instead of needing to press a vibrator against your clit during intercourse to get off, you need to press a mental image of gay sex against your brain to get off.

So, yeah, your husband could have hurt feelings, and it could take some time to work through this. But think of the potential rewards!

Instead of leaving your husband behind when you start fantasizing about men fucking men

Now, here’s the simple, easy, obvious fix—the sex hack: dirty talk. and women fucking women, you’ll get to take him along! (And I don’t want to tell on straight guys here, but some of them really like hearing about two women fucking. Your husband could be one of those guys.)

“BIMISSING can be fully present in her body and feel the great pleasure of sex with her husband—and know that this is where her pleasure is coming from physically—while also be intentional about bringing this fantasy into her mind at the same time,” says Dr. Lori Brotto, a clinical psychologist and a sex researcher at the University of British Columbia and the author of Better Sex Through Mindfulness: How Women Can Cultivate Desire. “And if BIMISSING can share her fantasy out loud, she’ll be able to hear herself sharing the details of this fantasy, which is an auditory trigger that will keep her rooted in the here-and-now even more and intensify the pleasure. If her husband responds with his own sounds of pleasure,” or with fantasies of his own that build on yours, “that will further anchor BIMISSING in the present moment.”

Picture this, BIMISSING: You’re having hot straight sex with your hot straight husband.

You start thinking about two hot fags or two hot dykes going at it. But now, instead of feeling guilty about these fantasies, you’ll be able to

share them with your husband. And, yes, it’s a hard truth to share, BIMISSING, but for all you know your husband has some go-to fantasies of his own that he’d love to share—fantasies he may rely on when he needs a little help getting to the point of orgasmic inevitability. If you can successfully integrate your go-to fantasies (two women or two men fucking the shit out of each other) with your in-the-moment reality (your husband is fucking the shit out of you while you describe two women or two men fucking the shit out of each other), you won’t have to “dip out” to come.

—Dan Savage P.S. I feel the exact same way—really like men, couldn’t live without men—and I’m not a lesbian either. Coincidence? I don’t think so.

There are no coincidences.

Fol low D r. L or i Brot to on Tw it ter @DrLoriBrotto. Dr. Brotto’s new book, Better Sex Through Mindfulness: The At-Home Guide to Cultivating Desire, comes out soon.

This is my first time asking for your advice. I’m a gay man in his early 50s, a bit heavy, but people tell me I’m handsome. I haven’t gotten close to a man, let alone had sex with one, in many years.

I recently decided to try some dating apps. In the past week I’ve had two hookups, both safe, but neither was successful. The first went south very quickly, the second went better with the other guy getting off. While I very much enjoyed the physical closeness, I couldn’t get hard either time. I have no problems with that by itself. I tried relaxing and just getting into the experience, but I just couldn’t get aroused. Both guys were attractive, the second even more so, but I couldn’t get into it either time.

Any thoughts on how I might be able to get past this block? I just feel like giving up on physical relationships for good.

—My First Time Take the pressure off yourself and your dick by telling your next partner that you want to focus on his dick, not yours. And be honest about why: “I’ve been out of action for a few years and I’m easing back in to sex and right now it’s working better for me to focus on getting the other guy off.” Then pop a Viagra, put on a cock ring, relax, and enjoy. If you wind up being able to get off with him, great. If you don’t but you liked the guy and he enjoyed being with you, suggest getting together again. Then with those first-timewith-a-new-guy jitters out of the way, MFT, it’ll be easier to get out of your own way, get hard, and stay hard.

It’ll also help if you gave less weight to the one experience that went south quickly and more to the one that “went better.” Start rounding that second experience up to a success instead of down to a defeat, okay?

—DS P.S. Heavier guys can be handsome, and some men strongly prefer heavier guys. So believe those guys who tell you they think you’re handsome. Because as a general rule, MFT, when someone who’s actively trying to get in your pants tells you they find you hot or think you’re handsome, they’re probably not lying.

Email your Savage Love questions to mail@savagelove.net.

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Vacation: All He Ever Wanted

GIRLS GLOBAL ACADEMY RFP for Design Build Services Girls Global Academy Public Charter School is seeking proposals from individuals or companies to provide the following services for the 2022-2025 school years: Design Build Services including conceptual drawings, permit sets, permitting, demolition, construction, and management of phases 3 and 4 of our school build out. To request a full copy of the RFP, send email to the Point of Contact, Jason Mellen, Director of Operations at jason@girlsglobalacademy.org. Send your proposal by January 31st 2022 by noon via the POC.

Housing Every vacationer has a moment when they wonder what would happen if they never returned home. It is a tantalizing idea, an indulgence on the last day of ocean views and cocktails with little umbrellas in them, as someone is looking down the barrel of returning to traffic, endless meetings, and workplace anxiety.

Sundown, the new dramatic thriller from Mexican f ilmmaker Michael Franco, attempts to complicate that fantasy with the abdication of real responsibility, and a hero who selfishly plunges himself in a delicate socioeconomic milieu he does not care to understand.

Like Franco’s previous film, New Order (2020), Sundown (2021) opts for the facsimile of depth over the real thing. Provocation only works when the filmmaker has the wherewithal to see their idea to its logical conclusion, and in scene after scene, Franco pulls his punches.

The opening scenes depict an idyll familiar to anyone who scrolls through Instagram. A family is on vacation at an exclusive Acapulco resort, the sort with infinity pools, where guests take golf cart rides between the lobby and their secluded cabana. Tim Roth plays Neil, who is enjoying the good life at this resort with Alice (Charlotte Gainsbourg) and her two children. An unexpected phone call upends their vacation: Alice’s mother dies suddenly. Neil observes Alice without much empathy, going through the motions of returning to London, but at the last possible moment, he tells her he forgot his passport at the hotel. She is too griefstricken to realize this is a transparent lie, so Neil returns to his Acapulco vacation, this time staying in a seedier hotel. Soon he strikes up a relationship with Bernice (Iazua Larios)— their language barrier is not a problem—and ignores Alice’s constant calls and texts.

To Franco’s credit (he also wrote the script), he preserves a sense of surprise throughout Neil’s extended holiday. It sometimes takes a second to figure out whether what we see is actually happening, or part of Neil’s imagination. There are flashes of violence, a comment on income inequality in a community defined by poverty and obscene wealth—that come during periods of supposed calm (Austrian filmmaker Michael Haneke, who worked with Roth before his Funny Games remake, is a clear influence). But whereas Haneke has a withering

point of view over his characters and stories, exacting psychological torture on them, Franco cannot muster the same critique for Neil. He remains a curiously static figure, and Roth’s performance offers little sense of his interiority. There is some uncertainty of just how far he will push his extended holidays, a question that can only sustain one act of a film, not the entire time. When we learn more about Neil and his backstory clicks into shape, Franco opts for motivations that are depressingly familiar.

If individual scenes have tension and ambiguity, the larger story is where Franco loses his nerve. In scene after scene, he dampens the breadth of Neil’s transgression. Early scenes suggest that Neil and Alice are in an unhappy marriage, for example, and later we learn they are siblings, not spouses. That detail is almost cowardly: Why not make Neil into a rotten husband and father, as opposed to a rotten brother and uncle—and son? Perhaps like Neil, Franco wants to abdicate some responsibility as filmmaker and not consider the full implications of his premise. His preference for half-measures continues toward the final scenes where one additional detail might recalibrate everything we know about the plot, except Franco keeps its exact implications ambiguous. If we consider what the final scene means for what precedes it, Sundown amounts to little more than a cruel joke, and Franco is the only one who gets it.

Guilt might be an inevitable subtext to many holidays at the beach. As vacationers leave the airport for their all-inclusive packages, they pass locals who do not live so glamorously, and these locals are often the same people who see that every whim is met. The recent HBO miniseries The White Lotus brilliantly depicts all the anxiety and resentment that this can provide, while Sundown never skewers its characters with the same mix of disdain and empathy. Neil indulges himself because he can and because he wants to, and Franco sneers at anyone who wants more. Roth, Franco, and the rest of the cast and crew must have had gorgeous digs while they worked on this shallow film about shallow people, so perhaps we should at least admire their hustle for getting to work in paradise.

—Alan Zilberman Sundown opens at E Street Cinema on Feb. 4.

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WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM FEBRUARY 4, 2022 19

DIVERSIONS CROSSWORD

INITIAL REACTIONS

By Brendan Emmett Quigley

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24. Drug busters

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22. Stage crew?

32. Scribbler’s tablet 34. Giraffe’s cousin

35. Space behind the velvet rope at a club

36. ___ Semaine de Bonté (Max Ernst novel)

37. Booker T. & the ___

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43. Cream on the table?

3. Still sleepy, say

45. Edible garlic stems

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46. ___ Downs (English racetrack) 48. An NCO 49. Really funny album cover?

16. Wordworking tool that creates symmetrical cuts

54. Its quarter says “Foundation in Education”

17. Painting of someone’s digitally made pickup line?

57. Brought home

19. Microscope lens

58. NYC mayor Adams 60. Line in an address

20. Arson investigating org.

21. Champagne brand with an umlaut in its name 22. Help out 23. Printer’s color 25. Fabric pattern that you shouldn’t wear at the office?

27. Tao, literally 29. Loaded with beef fat 30. Georgetown is part of it 33. Corp. takeover 34. Egg in 4 down 38. Comedian without a clue?

40. “AFK, dog”?

42. Kits for

61. Julius Caesar outfit 62. Two aweinspiring French handles?

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46. Kicks out

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47. Formed a superteam

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9. Excessively sentimental

52. Ready to serve, as champagne

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56. Cosmetic brand 59. Invitation word

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62. Be shy?

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FEBRUARY 10-13 12+ SHOWS theatrewashington.org