WEIRD MAGAZINE MAY ISSUE

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The Bloodthirsty State

The Bloodthirsty State By Cameron Cutrone

The Bloodthirsty State It seems like mandatory, warrantless blood drawing has become an expected part of peoples’ travels recently. As ubiquitous as the airport genital groping. Over the last five years or so, you may have noticed the growing law enforcement trend of the “No Refusal Weekend.” These have taken place during holidays mostly. Mardi Gras in Austin, Super Bowl in Dallas, New Year’s in San Antonio, etc. This stealthy incrementalism has apparently eased the citizenry into the mood of acceptance. People would air their grievances, moan and groan, then the No Refusal Weekend would be over. Then, seemingly overnight, it became a sort of “No Refusal 24-7, 365 Day Rule.” Anywhere, any time, they could take a blood sample. Such a raw expression of State power begs the common literate to ask if this may be about something bigger than drunkenness and reckless driving. The 4th and 5th amendment are on permanent vacation. Exactly when did it become accepted police practice in Texas to draw blood from a person suspected of being under the influence on the side of the road against their will? Well as of Sept. 1, 2009, this has been the case. The passage of Texas Senate Bill 328 made it so. Mind you, the bill wasn’t successful in making thousands of police officers magically trained in invasive medical procedures, nor did it make every dark, unsanitary stop on the shoulder of a highway a doctor’s office.

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More importantly, the bill can never make every backseat of a squad car a constitution-free zone. However, this nightmare is exactly what the control freaks had in mind. Of course, even some of the most contrarian minds were won over by the pressure of Mothers Against Drunk Driving and some sobbing witness’ accounts. None of these accounts included a story of a person causing a wreck AFTER being pulled over and passing the litany of existing sobriety tests and managing evade detection. But all logic gets thrown out the window when lawmakers are badgered with constant choruses of “What about the CHILDREN???!!!” Now it’s hands across America. Always for the children, right? Okay then, lets talk about the children for a moment. If this do-gooder government paternalism continues unabated, our children are set to inherit a Police State where anything goes if you have a badge. And if you aren’t serving the State and it’s preferred from of coercive corporatism, you will be confined to a virtual straightjacket. Do the children deserve more than their parent’s antiquated notion of security? This affects every facet of life it is permitted to. Whether it’s government molesting you on every plane trip, insurance companies snooping through your receipts, or your Apple iphone tracking your every location, our culture has started seeking refuge in paranoia.

Marinate on that things that are for a minute. Is really parasomeone point- noid? ing those things We need to start drawing some lines. Forced blood extracout paranoid? tion on the side of a road by an under-trained, non-medical law Or could enforcement officer is an illegal, invasive search in violation of it be the the fourth amendment. It can be dangerous to the health of the one’s acsuspect if the officer is unaware tually DOor unable to deal with any suspects’ medical conditions. They ING those

could be on blood thinners or be diabetic. The conditions are not that of a hospital or a doctor’s office. This can be hazardous to the suspect AND to the officer. In fact the police officer’s unions and civic fraternal orders should be equally concerned about this. It sounds more like a paramedic’s job. Better yet, how about making it nobody’s job? Texas House Bill 440 is a good start. Offered recently by Representative Sylvester Turner (D-Houston), the bill aims to take medical tech out of the duties expected of police

officers. But what must be addressed is the coercive, intrusive nature of the tactic in order to put the practice to a halt. The American Civil Liberties Union has been effective and testified in favor of the legislation in a committee hearing. The issue is one of principle first. The safety issue is important, but let’s not kid ourselves. This is a violation. Where is your line in the sand? Cinco de Mayo could be your “Refusal Day!” Choose a day, a weekend, or choose Refusal as a way of life!



ASK S.P.I.R.I.T. PARANORMAL Now you can ask SPIRIT Paranormal your own questions:

Mirza ~ Brownsville, TX

What do you think about the current paranormal TV shows? - Jason ~ Mcallen, TX S.P.I.R.I.T.:We feel it is a very good thing that people are becoming more aware of the reality of the spirit world and afterlife, but feel the time has come to go from the Flintstones to the Jetsons. From barbaric taunting and provocation to intellectual rapport and interaction. From ghost hunting with spears in the form of EMF meters, handheld cameras, and digital recorders to casting a net of sophisticated devices that create energetic fields that attract spirit manifestation. We need shows with teams applying serious scientific method with repeatable experiments to establish credibility so that serious funding can go into the research and developement of instrumental technologies. Entertainment is good, but feel scientific and technological advancement is better.

Why do certain people have guardians or spirits around them watching them? Or do we all? -

Ask yourself. If you were to be placed in a dimension where you could see everyone you loved, who would you watch and look after? Now ask youself, who would look after you? Therein lies your answer.

Do you ever get scared when you go on these investigations? Irina ~ St. Petersburg, Russia We have a different perspective on spirits and purported haunted locations than most people, in that we have come to conclude that spirits are around us everywhere and at all times, and not exclusive to such locations. When you begin to look at this way it becomes something as mundane and normal as the wind. Now, just like there are windy days and even storms there are also locations where spirits are more dense and energized and can manifest in the physcial, but once you’ve been through the storms you have less and less fear.

How is it that people can find water with dowsing rods? - Katie ~ Edinburg, TX

S.P.I.R.I.T.: Dowsing rods are sensitive instruments that allow you to tune into subtle energies and the subconscious mind. As the dowser walks the rods sway from right to left and clockwise and counter clockwise slowly navigating the direction and path that leads to the item or object under investigation. Some paranormal investigative groups also use dowsing rods to detect subtle spirit energies, but we prefer a pendulum because it is more portable and just as effective.

Whats the point of reincarnation if we don’t remember our past lives? - Cynthia ~ Reynosa, Mexico S.P.I.R.I.T.:We feel that reincarnation is the evolution of the soul and not the ego. Therefore, what we remember is only spiritual understanding and awareness, while past life experiences remain dormant in the subconscious mind. During a past life regression these memories can be brought to the forefront with vivid images and details of past lives. There has also been documented cases where one can speak and write fluently in ancient languages that are no longer used and the person has never known. They are there, just hidden from

ordinary waking consciousness.

If a person has been, for example, beheaded, and not all body parts have been laid to rest in the same place, are they likely to be a restless spirit? And if so, is there anything that can be done to help them pass over into peace? Alyson ~ England, United Kingdom? Anyone exposed to a sudden premature death may not want to let go and attach to the physical. We don’t personally believe in restless spirits, for we all remain awake and alive, just in another plane of existence. The spiritual planes closer to the physical are of a lower frequency. The ultimate spiritual aim is to achieve ego death and shed all emotional baggage so that we can go beyond the astral, break the reincarnation cycle, and enter the higher planes of consciousness and existence. Where we end up is based on our individual spiritual developement, unfoldment and evolution and left to the creator. These again, are our own per-

sonal beliefs based on conclusions we have reached through our research and spiritual understanding and not pushing them on anyone.

I have a question. It seems like there are many tragedies that have been happening in the world lately and I hear all this talk about the year 2012 being the end of the world. Do I need to empty my bank account and party like its 1999 or is it just another date? - Steve ~ McAllen, TX We don’t want to play prophet here, but we feel it may be a shift from third to fourth dimensional reality. In the fourth dimension, time as we know it ceases to exist, hence the end and obsoleteness of any calendar based on our current measure of linear time. The Mayan’s and Hopi Indians speak about the return of the gods; the fourth dimension is full of life. The bible talks about a rapture; some ghosts/spirits exist in the fourth dimension and when they appear to us quickly disappear into thin air. The future is always in a state of potential and the prophecies speak of an apocalypse or the dawning of a new age. In fourth dimensional reality thoughts manifest instantly; could our fate be a reflection of what we envision? December 21st 2012 also marks the end of a 26,000 year cycle known as the precession of the equinoxes. On this day, the earth and sun will be perfectly aligned at the center of the milky way galaxy. At the center of our galaxy is a super massive black hole; a reality beyond space and time. We are a professional scientific paranormal investigative group and are available for free investigations Valleywide. We would love to hear any questions you may have related to the paranormal, supernatural, mystical and spiritual and will post the answers on this segment. Please forward all your questions or investigation inquiries to: info@spiritinvestigator.com or http://facebook.com/ spiritinvestigators

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The JFK/UFO Connection Bogus Or Unaswered Questions?

The JFK-UFO Connection: Bogus Documents or Unanswered Questions? By Lee Speigel

mentioned how important it is to be extremely careful when looking at UFO documents and how it’s critical to know the background of this information. While researching materials for his new book, “A Celebration of Freedom: JFK and the New Frontier” (Wasteland Press), Atlanta, Ga., history

seen over the Soviet Union and he was very concerned that the Soviets might misinterpret these UFOs as U.S. aggression, believing that it was some of our technology,” Lester told AOL News. “I think this is one of the reasons why he wanted to get his hands on this information and get it away from the jurisdiction of NASA so he could say to the Soviets, ‘Look, that’s not us, we’re not doing it, we’re not being provocative. In fact, just to show you that it’s not us, what do you think about us working together on the exploration of space?’” Lester added. Also in his book, Lester reprints an intriguing letter written by Maxwell W. Hunter of the National Aeronautics and Space Council (from the executive office of the president) to Robert F. Packard of the Office of International Scientific Affairs. Hunter was a pioneer rocket scientist and scientific adviser to both Presidents Kennedy and Lyndon Johnson. He wrote this 1963 letter, titled “Thoughts on the Space Alien Race Question.” This is not the first time these and more provocative UFO-related documents have surfaced over the last several decades. Many files point to earlier presidents, Harry S. Truman and Dwight D. Eisenhower, as also being interested in the UFO subject.

Do you like a good UFO detective story? Well, here’s one for you. And it’s ongoing, so we don’t yet know the ending. It involves President John F. Kennedy’s interest in UFOs shortly before his death and an allegation that he may have angered officials in his administration when he asked for information on the subject. Recently, the FBI opened a new website, “The Vault,” that lets you view a variety of documents, including those regarding UFOs. I looked into one document that appears to include a phony UFO story and

teacher William Lester used the Freedom of Information Act to get some previously classified documents. Two of them were written by Kennedy on the same date, Nov. 12, 1963 -- 10 days before his assassination. One was to the CIA director, asking for UFO files (See JFK Doc 2); the other was to the NASA administrator, with Kennedy expressing a desire for cooperation with the former Soviet Union on mutual outer space activities (See JFK Doc 3). “One of his concerns was that a lot of these UFOs were being

Perhaps the most intensely scrutinized documents ever to emerge on UFOs have come to be known as the Majestic 12 or MJ-12. This was a reference to a top-secret group of military officials and scientists allegedly appointed by Truman in 1947 to keep close tabs on the activities of alien beings on Earth after a reported UFO crash near Roswell, N.M.

Let’s try to sort out the facts. In 1984, the MJ-12 documents first appeared when a UFO researcher, Jaime Shandera, received a plain brown envelope that contained a roll of 35mm black-and-white film that developed into a multipage 1952 document -- presumably created for Eisenhower -- regarding something called “Operation Majestic 12.”

When the MJ-12 documents were eventually made public around 1987, skeptics poured out of the woodwork, condemning the documents as fraudulent and totally dismissing them. To get some much needed credible information about the documents, I turned to Linda Moulton Howe, a renowned investigative reporter who explored the MJ12 materials in 2008. An excellent, in-depth series of reports on her efforts to uncover the truth of the MJ-12 story can be found at her Earthfiles website. “It’s the Catch-22 circle that counter-intel is so good at and they depend on it to divert 99 1/2 percent of the public and the media. And that is, you just put out the word ‘This is a hoax’ and the population accepts it, and they know that, and they have done this,” said Howe, a multiple Emmy Award-winning TV producer and critically acclaimed author of numerous books, including “Glimpses of Other Realities, Volumes I and II” (Linda Moulton Howe Productions). “So, whether it’s swamp gas, weather balloons, hoaxes of hubcaps being thrown up into the air -- the government’s efforts back in the late ‘40s and early ‘50s became preposterous and cartoonish to try to get control of a subject that they knew was absolutely critical,” Howe told AOL News. The controversy surrounding MJ-12 is a prime example of the age-old “he said, she said” battle in the universe of UFO believers and skeptics.

When I reached out to them for any information they might provide, the responses ranged from “I can’t help you,” “I had not uncovered any information relating to JFK’s interest in UFOs” and “I’m afraid I know nothing about JFK’s interest in UFOs” to “I don’t know anything about it. Maybe when he heard ‘unidentified foreign objects,’ he thought they were European women.” So, I kept digging. And Howe connected me with the man she worked closely with in 2008 on the MJ-12 documents. The conversation I had with physicist/aeronautical engineer Robert Wood, former deputy director of McDonnell Douglas -- the major aerospace manufacturer and defense contractor -- really opened my eyes. In the 1960s, Wood led a McDonnell Douglas team to study UFOs and he’s put a huge amount of investigative work into the MJ-12 documents. His website offers a stunning display of MJ-12 items, complete with individual document analysis, and he’s collaborated with Howe to piece together and authenticate these eye-opening files. After a 43-year career with McDonnell Douglas, Wood retired in 1993. That, coupled with more than three decades of investigating UFOs, makes him a highly credible voice about the phenomenon.

But MJ-12 has taken on a life of its own because of the large volume of documents and the attention to detail within, including the verification process conducted by serious researchers into specific files that suggest government officials were unhappy with Kennedy’s interest in UFOs.

At McDonnell Douglas, “We had authority to look at how UFOs might work, with gravitycontrolled devices. And I hired (nuclear physicist) Stanton Friedman -- it was the first job he ever had that paid him to study UFOs,” Wood said about the man widely considered the hardest-working UFO investigator today, who offers his own critique of MJ-12 skepticism and debunkers.

I contacted the John F. Kennedy Library in Boston, searching for information about JFK’s UFO interest. I was told they didn’t catalogue that kind of thing there, but they gave me the names of five Kennedy biographer/historians -- Robert Dallek, James Giglio, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Michael O’Brien and Laurence Leamer.

“There are those who believe (despite evidence to the contrary) that no alien spacecraft have ever visited Earth. Therefore, any documents saying that they have must be false,” Friedman pointed out. “No need to do a detailed investigation, to spend time in archives, research the people involved, etc. They must be fraudulent!”

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The JFK/UFO Connection Bogus Or Unaswered Questions?

The JFK-UFO Connection: Bogus Documents or Unanswered Questions? By Lee Speigel Under the auspices of McDonnell Douglas, Friedman worked closely with Wood looking into reports, including stories told by alleged UFO abductees. “We didn’t get any breakthroughs and our report was never submitted to the government -- it was a McDonnell Douglas project -- and so we never told the government about it,” Wood said. In the 1990s, Wood obtained a series of the MJ-12 documents, including something known as the “burned” memo -- believed to have been written in the early 1960s -- that was reportedly saved from being burned, presumably to forever hide important UFO information, including parts that referred to Kennedy.

allow. Please submit your views no later than October. Your action to this matter is critical to the continuance of the group.” To authenticate the documents, Wood turned to forensics and linguistics specialists who carefully looked at things like the paper they were printed on, ink age, watermarks, font types and other markings. “I hired a forensics company to check the age of the ink and to check several other things that you can date, using the same techniques you’d use in a court of law,” Wood explained. “And all the critics who wave their arms and say, ‘Well, you can duplicate anything,’ they forget about the fact that these documents actually showed up in the public domain long before our sophisticated techniques got on the market. “I never figured out who the original document leaker was or what they thought I would do with it, other than what I’ve done, which has been to discuss it professionally, ethically and from a point of view of intellectual curiosity.”

The memo contains a reference to “Lancer,” which was John F. Kennedy’s Secret Service code name.

After gathering all their information, Wood and his son, Ryan, produced a 2008 television documentary, “The Secret,” shown on the then Sci Fi Channel.

The first page of the nowinfamous burned memo (See JFK Doc 4), reportedly written by the director of Central Intelligence, said:

After exhaustive hands-on analysis of the MJ-12 documents, including the volatile burned memo, Wood came to some striking conclusions:

“As you must know, Lancer has made some inquiries regarding our activities, which we cannot

“I think the most important set of documents are the ones that show that we started this

program in 1942, after recovering the first craft in 1941 -- at the beginning of the war, just a few days after Pearl Harbor. “The second most important set of documents, I think, is the one that links this to the JFK assassination, and that’s the burned memo. “And the third most important documents were the ones that deal with what we were doing about it in the ‘50s, how we were going to absorb the technology and reverse-engineer it, and how it would affect our entire structure of technology. “That’s my assessment of its relative importance. The most important idea that people have not grasped at all is that this program started in early 1942. The second most important idea is that the program is not under the control of the president and when the president was about to leak it, they bumped him off.” Wood’s implication that JFK was killed because of his interest in UFOs is startling, to say the least. But he’s not the only person who considers this a possibility. “I think Kennedy was very interested in UFOs on several fronts,” Lester suggested after finishing his book on Kennedy’s life. “There seemed to be kind of an idealistic scientific angle to it, but there was also this hardcore tactical angle that he was trying to successfully play, in what were very volatile times. “It’s almost impossible for me to believe that there’s no connection. Now I couldn’t go into a courtroom and prove that there was a direct correlation, but I find it hard to believe that there’s no connection there.” If this is all true, then it opens the biggest can of worms ever. And yet, Wood’s background and integrity shouldn’t be taken lightly.

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“People always ask me, ‘How would the government keep a secret,’ because everybody knows that governments don’t keep secrets,” Wood said. “As I got involved in classified work, I concluded a couple of things: the higher your clearance level and the more sophisticated the program was, the smarter the people were in the room, almost without exception. “These guys get smarter and smarter the more complex it is or the more secret it is, and therefore, they are very clever and have a lot of enjoyment in figuring out how to accomplish their missions, which is to keep the public in the dark.” Certainly Wood’s career achievements are not in dispute, so there doesn’t seem to be a reason for him to be lying or making this stuff up. And,

by the way, he doesn’t think there’s just one group of ETs visiting us. “There’s another dimension here that people don’t always integrate and that is, what’s the aliens’ role in this matter? I’m satisfied there’s at least six kinds and they each have their own agendas. It seems like the only thing that’s the same is that none of them really want to come out and openly admit that they’re here.” Are the MJ-12 documents real or phony? So much mystery still swirls around the assassination of JFK. For conspiracy theorists this is only more fuel on the fire. To be sure, the debate will continue. But for now, with the information presented here, you can make up your own mind. At the very least, it’ll give you something to wonder about.


Comedy In Texas: Spotlight Kelly Lee - Curtis Hammill - Michael Nieto Russell Urias & Nicholas Aluotto

San Marcos

new comics. We at Stand Up San Marcos try to make everyone feel welcome and provide feedback so we can all grow together and not perpetuate disfunction by re-enactment of adolescent trauma...like some people in other cities. Interview By Russell Dowden

W: What do you like most about performing comedy in San Marcos? Kelly Lee: All the people

that make up the San Marcos scene make performing here an enjoyable experince each and every time.

Curtis Hammill-

It’s got that Cheers kind of atmosphere that is comfortable, but with a Girls Gone Wild kind of mentality. Might be just me though.

Russ I love the intimacy of a

small room where you don’t even really need a mic. There’s also no pressure there. It’s a mix of more experienced comics and people just starting, sometimes for the very first time, and we embrace that. It’s just a fun room. It also doesn’t hurt that the crowd is made up of mostly college kids who are too drunk and/or stoned to not find me hilarious.

Michael Nieto - I like

performing in San Marcos because we are open to all comers. In Austin, there tends to be cliques of comedians who were picked on in high school and so they want revenge on their step-dads or something so they act like dicks toward any

W: How did you guys first get into Comedy? Kelly Lee: Me and my buddy 6 years ago were your typical “Whats our new years resolution you ask? Stand Up Comedy Domination!!” I quit six months later.

Curtis Hammill-

I got started in San Marcos when I finally convinced myself with the help of too much Jim Beam that I could talk an audience into laughter.

Russ I’m pretty much the stereotypical class clown, loves to make everyone laugh person. So it was only natural that I would love being on stage making people laugh. That and I pretty much require constant validation and praise, pretty much all forms of positive attention, to stay happy. So instead of being a needy, whiny asshole, I decided comedy pretty much took care of that.

Michael Nieto - I held

some people at screwdriver point until they would listen to my jokes. Then I became funny. Now they just let me do comedy.

W: What is the most exciting gig you ever worked in San Marcos? Kelly Lee: Definantly Ron Shock! He’s a beast of a Comedian and a legend and he’s the only one I worked for.

Curtis Hammill-

Billy D. Washington for me. He is so skilled at different styles of comedy that it is very impressive to watch.

Russ I got to do a show with

Matt Bearden that was really memorable for me. Not only is Matt hilarious, but we had a great crowd and an awesome show. I remember people coming up to me after and asking me how to get to my website, which does not exist. Facebook still counts though, right?

Michael Nieto - I

Every gig I worked in San Marcos existed. At least I think so, Its possible I hallucinated some of them, but that brings to mind the question ‘what is existence?’ and that my friend is not comedy but philosophy. Oh, what was the most exciting gig I worked in San Marcos? I really don’t get excited about things, I’m a bit of a flatliner. I guess it was pretty cool talking to Ron Shock about baseball.

W: Who are some of your influences and style of comedy?

Kelly Lee: Eddie Murphy, Lavelle Crawford, Mitch Hedberg, Richard Pryor and Dave Chapelle. I try to be as little white and as much black as possible, mixed in with a little yelling.

Curtis Hammill-

The late great Greg Giraldo, Robin Williams, George Carlin, and of course The Golden Girls (not kidding).

Russ Louis C.K. is definitely

my favorite comedian. When you can talk about anything at all, whether it’s observational about current events or extremely introspective and you’re always making people laugh, you’re doing it right. I don’t ever want to be labeled a certain type of comedian other than “hilarious” and “addictingly handsome”. I like to be able to talk about everything on stage from serious things about me to goofy things I think of while high. If I make sure not to limit my material, I won’t ever limit my audience.

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Comedy In Texas: Spotlight

San Marcos

Kelly Lee - Curtis Hammill - Michael Nieto Russell Urias & Nicholas Aluotto

brain, which is a great attribute to have on your side. He also comes off as a regular guy who you could have a few drinks and 30 cigarettes with.

Michael Nieto Doug Stanhope is really good at finding the Toblerone floating in the sea of horseshit.

W: Do you guys prefer comedy in Rock clubs versus comedy clubs? Kelly Lee: It Depends on the jokes happening in either and management

Curtis Hammill-

If there is an audience that wants to laugh then I don’t care where the venue is.

Russ Honestly, comedy

Interview By Russell Dowden

question?

Michael Nieto - I like to

the show is in the future so I only have the option of looking forward. One would need to warp space-time to look backwards to see something that has yet to be, so yes.

be absurd, without being stupid. I enjoy undermining people’s upbringing and subsequently angering them when they realize that their whole life is a sham. That’s not easy to do with a one-liner.

W: Are you looking forward to opening up for Doug Stanhope.?

Michael Nieto - Well,

W: What do you like most about Doug Stanhope.

Kelly Lee: Yep!

Kelly Lee: That he subconciuosly stands for hope.

Curtis Hammill-

Curtis Hammill-

Like Ben Roethlisberger getting into a sorority house with a pocket full of Rohypnol. Pretty effin excited! Russ That’s like asking if a prostitute looks forward to getting paid. Wait, what? I’ve never been good with analogies. This show will be so good though, people are gonna be like “wow, that was a really good show”. Does THAT answer your

What’s not to like? He drinks and smokes and isn’t afraid to call anybody on their B.S.. He’s like a drinking, smoking, funny Gandhi who doesn’t have an eating disorder and also is not from India.

Russ He doesn’t have

a “maybe I shouldn’t say this” check system in his

clubs are way easier. People come there to laugh which makes it easy to get the crowd with you. At rock clubs to get the crowd with you, first you have to get them to stop talking about “that totally new underground band that’s so ironic they don’t have instruments” and turn around and look at you. Most of the crowd is there to drink PBR and listen to music, so you have to not be discouraged. It’s still fun, you just have to be ready for it.

Michael Nieto - I don’t

think it matters as long as the audience is into the show. If the crowd is there to see comedy, the show could be anywhere.

W: Have you ever bombed? Kelly Lee:

ALL. THE. TIME.

Curtis Hammill(sigh) yes

W: What kind of situations inspires you to write jokes Kelly Lee: Situations that involve nonsense, idiots, awkwardness and modern art…my life!

Curtis Hammill-

(Honestly, tragedy inspires me most. When things are going terrible in my life I can’t help but joke about it. I tend to do the same with other peoples tragedies.

W: Tell Weird Magazine readers your favorite joke you wrote. Curtis Hammill-

Gotta see the show to hear the jokes.

Michael Nieto - I like to read gardening

magazines for the pictures of dirty women on their knees.

I’ll make the readers a deal: Come out to the show, and I’ll tell you like 10 minutes worth of my favorite jokes. I’ll even let you buy me a drink. Russ

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POLICE STATE IN FULL EFFECT! NOw THAT OSAMA BODY OFF ICE

declared that the “battle to stop al-Qaeda and its syndicate of terror” is not over and said the U.S. would continue to boost its counterterrorism cooperation with other nations, including Pakistan, USA Today reports.

Police State Kicks Into Overdrive On Dubious News of Osama Takedown Kurt Nimmo Infowars.com May 2, 2011 As expected, the unverified assassination of Osama bin Laden in Pakistan has led to increased police state activity in the United States. On Monday, the NYPD flooded the city’s subway system with additional cops. The Port Authority of New York and New Jersey, “out of an abundance of caution,” said it has added more police at airports, the George Washington Bridge and ground zero, according to NBC New York. An influx of storm troopers were apparent to riders on the Metropolitan Area Transit Authority in the nation’s capitol. Transit police, along with other law enforcement in the area, have increased security “as a precautionary measure related to the death of bin Laden,” according to Metro spokeswoman Lisa Farbstein.

District of Columbia Mayor Vincent Gray urged people in and around the nation’s capital to “pay more attention than they normally do” and “just be vigilant at this stage.” Amtrak has dispatched canine teams and squads of officers trained to detect the presence of fumes left behind after someone passes through with an explosive device, the San Francisco Chronicle reports this morning. In Los Angeles, police have begun increasing patrols of religious institutions and other potential terrorist targets, according to Politico. “We are somewhat concerned about any retaliation because of his [bin Laden’s] death,” Deputy Police Chief Mike Downing said on Sunday night. The government insists the unverified assassination will increase terror attacks and it must redouble its efforts against al-Qaeda, the terror group named after the Mujahideen database. Secretary of State Clinton

Rep. Pete King, head of the House Homeland Security Committee, said on Monday that al-Qaeda will “try to avenge this death” and warned “we’ll have to be on full alert.” In other words, the wars in Afghanistan, Pakistan, and now Libya will continue while at home the threat of al-Qaeda retaliation will be used to expand Gestapo zones from airports to the streets and beyond. If another false flag event is accomplished, the urgency to impose a police state and completely destroy the Bill of Rights and any remaining vestige of liberty will reach a fever pitch with throngs of blood-thirsty citizens calling hysterically for totalitarian rule in America.

Mainstream Media Blames Fake OBL Photo Used By Mainstream Media On “Conspiracy Theorists” Steve Watson Infowars.com May 2, 2011 The London Guardian has suggested that the fake image used

by several British mainstream media websites this morning on their front pages was the work of “conspiracy theorists” who claimed it was genuine. The Guardian notes that the image was used by the Mail, Times, Telegraph, Sun and Mirror websites, who picked it up from an online news site. The image was removed by the newspapers after it became apparent that it was a fake that had been online for over two years. “Since then, however, the image has been claimed as genuine on a number of conspiracy forums and used to substantiate claims that the terrorist responsible for the 9/11 bombings had been killed.” Guardian writer Amelia Hill states.

The image is a crude photoshop composite of two different images. The composite has been used in several articles over the past two years, the very purpose of many of which was to highlight the fact that multiple experts and credible figures were on record as believing Bin Laden to be already long dead. This sorry saga once again demonstrates how the corporate dinosaur media has been completely surpassed by the alternative media and the new social media. Meanwhile, the U.S. government says they have pictures of Bin Laden’s body and are considering whether and when to release them. According to The Los Angeles Times:

Hill provides no link to the forums she is referring to, or the “conspiracy theorists” that suggested it was genuine.

During the operation, a photo of his face was transmitted to analysts, who confirmed the identification.

The Guardian’s live blog speculated whether the image was real when it was first used this morning, where as this website, Prisonplanet.com, the “conspiracy theorists”, immediately reported it to be completely fake.

According to Pentagon officials, photos of Bin Laden’s dead face do exist but those widely distributed on the Internet are fake. At some point, if only to convince die-hard Bin Laden followers, officials are expected to release a corpse photo, as has been done in the past when famous villains such as Che Guevara and Iraqi President Saddam Hussein were killed or captured. Additionally, such special ops are typically videotaped by mini-helmet cams to document a sensitive mission and assist in debriefing and future training.

Indeed, after we reported it was fake, the news spread like wildfire on Twitter and led directly to the removal of the image by all the mainstream sources that had used it.

Page 14 • weirdmagazine.com



BALOOS 1900 South 77 Sunshine Strip Harlingen, TX (956) 428-2300

AZ: Bar key & pen W: What is the BEST PART about working here at Baloos? AZ: The swimming pool and the people W: Are you single? AZ: KINDA?

Ashley Zamora

all time?

W: Specialty Drink?

movie of

Contents in Drink?

“Boondock Saints” and “Pineapple Express” W: Secret nobody knows about Ashley AZ: No Comment!

Absolute, Malibu, Peach Shcnaps, OJ, pineapple juice, cranberry juice

W: Any Tatoo’s? AZ: One. (1) W: If you had a

W: Years Bartending? AZ: aLMOST A YEAR NOW. W: Your Favorite Night to work?

“ Do you have any more quotes for us ashley?

W:

AZ: a tie between

AZ: 22

AZ::you have beautiful eyes and you look like my daughter

AZ::”Absolute Laxer”

W: Ok? Favorite

W: AGE?

W: Worst pick up line you’ve ever gotten?

soundtrack for making love, What songs would be on it? AZ: anything from Incubus, Sevendust, and 311

AZ: :FRIdays

W: Hugs or Drugs? (you can say both)

W: CONTENTS OF POCKET?

AZ: HUGs!

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Quote of the Night?

yeah, "Go hard or go home" Weird dude: How about "go home hard" hey yoooo!



Miget Wrestling Federation Interview By Russell Dowden

W: Welcome to Weird Magazine guys.Tell us about Micro Wrestling Federation? MWF: The Micro Wrestling Federation is a professional wrestling organization featuring all “little people”/midget athletes and entertainers. MWF has been entertaining crowds nationwide since 2000, performing in 12-15 venues per month. All of our wrestlers have been professionally trained and are serious athletes. Most people come out of fascination, not knowing what to expect. After seeing the show, they leave impressed and as fans. We perform in all types of venues and in front of a broad spectrum of fans. We have shows in nightclubs, casinos, event centers, motorcycle rallies and state fairs. We have been featured on national television several times including Fox’s “Bones”, TruTV’s “Full Throttle”, and CMT’s “Strangest Ways to Make A Buck”.

W: Were you guys also on Half Pint Brawlers? MWF:No, they are a separate organization.

W: I saw a few midgets on Jackass 3 I thought?

MWF: Unfortunately the midgets on “Jackass 3” were not part of the MWF.

W: So how did this all start out The Micro Wrestling Federation? MWF: Midget Wrestling has been around for quite a long time. Originally normal wrestling promotions would occasionally include a match with midgets for variety. We decided to create an entire show and brand around it.

W: What can San Marcos TX expect from the show this year? MWF: San Marcos Tx can expect an action packed, high flying, entertaining show by the best midget wrestlers in the country.

W: How can folks learn more about the MWF? MWF: On our website www.microwrestling.com or check out some of our videos on youtube.

W:You know in the movie Time Bandits Napoleon loved to see little people fight each other and break and smash shit up. This is way better than that scene in the Movie! MWF:It’s been a while since I’ve seen the movie, but I would have to agree. I did love that movie as a kid though.

W: Where are you guys based out of? Does it hurt getting body Slammed? MWF: We are based outside of Nashville, TN. Of course it does hurt a bit to get slammed, but as long as its done right it’s minimal.

W: This is a great way to entertain people. What kinds of venues do you guys like to perform in? Rock n roll Bars? Biker events? Country Club? ShitKickkers? Headbangers? What types of crowds enjoy your Wresting events most? MWF: We seem to be quite popular with the biker crowd, we perform at many rallies every year. Rock venues, country bars, and nightclubs host the bulk of our shows. As our show is family friendly we also perform at many state fairs. Civic Centers and Event Centers usually bring the largest crowds as they have the capacity to handle it.

bleed, you can’t entertain.

W: Can we see some Midgets Bleed?

W: Final Thoughts to Weird Magazine readers as to what we can expect on May 21st?

MWF:We try to stay away from having our guys bleed. Our opinion is that if you have to

MWF:Whether you’ve seen midget wrestling before or not, you definitely want to check out

our show. We have some of the best athletes in the country, and our show is outstanding. You will see plenty of action, have some laughs, and have a great time for sure.

Visit online -

www.microwrestling.com Or Visit them at El Caribeon May 11th 2011. See Ad Next Page.

Page 18 • weirdmagazine.com



Sammy Hagar and Alien

Abduction Sammy Hagar and Alien Abduction By Sean Casteel

guitar legend Eddie Van Halen as a monument to drug abuse and alcoholism would be almost poignant if it weren’t so frighteningly unpleasant to imagine. The guitarist’s descent into total ineptitude on stage as he battled his demons during a 2004 reunion tour was

and then on the second album there’s ‘Space Age Sacrifice.’ My first solo album, there’s ‘Silver Lights’ and ‘Hot Rocks,’ which are about UFOs coming and taking people away.” It seems Hagar’s sci-fi mysticism was “hidden in plain sight” and was a theme of his writing from very early on. His next solo album included “Little Star” and “Someone Out There,” which are about how humankind is not alone in the universe. Sample lyrics go like this:

“I feel so scared and lonely to think we’re the only ones, when I know there’s someone out there and someday they’ll come.”

Classic rocker Sammy Hagar recently added his name to the list of celebrities who have spoken publicly about UFO and alien abduction encounters. While it is easy to anticipate the ridicule that will ensue regarding how the rock and roll lifestyle can easily lead to hallucinations and half-remembered dreams, the debunkers are not necessarily going to be right in this case. Hagar made his remarks about alien abduction in an interview posted on MTV’s Hive website and the story was quickly picked up by other news outlets. Hagar was doing the interview as part of a publicity campaign to promote his new autobiography, “Red: My Uncensored Life in Rock,” some of which was excerpted in the March 17, 2011 edition of “Rolling Stone.” The autobiography is the typical “tell all” account of excessive substance abuse and wildly out of control egos clashing with one another. Hagar had previously been a member of the 70s band Montrose and had a fairly successful solo career before he was asked to replace David Lee Roth as the lead singer for Van Halen in 1985. Hagar’s description of

also not easy to read about and was extremely painful for Hagar to witness. The two haven’t spoken for many years now. But getting back to Hagar’s interview with MTV’s Hive and his comments about the aliens: After the obligatory discussion of groupies and some gossipy talk about the unfriendly attitude evinced by David Lee Roth toward Hagar, the interviewer asks:

DAWN OF THE NEW MILLENNIA

“People say there’s no other life in the universe,” Hagar said by way of explanation. “But you know how big the universe is? It’s freaking huge!

“Before reading ‘Red,’ I didn’t realize you had an interest in mysticism. You’ve apparently consulted with psychics and studied numerology and had crazy dreams about UFOs. Why haven’t we seen more mystical themes in your music?” To which Hagar replies,

If we’re really the only ones out there, that’s scarier to me than thinking there are aliens. So my whole career I’ve been writing about these kinda things. But they’ve never been the hits. They’ve only been underground songs. If anything in the book has been played down, it’s my mystical side, because I don’t want to sound like I’m crazy.” The fear of seeming crazy Hagar complains of is one of the most frequent emotions felt when one first begins to assimilate the fact that one has experienced contact with aliens. When an abductee finally makes the brave decision to speak about his encounters, he must do so in spite of the possibility of being rejected by family and friends as a new and strange reality begins to take hold. But it is a reality that Hagar seems to inhabit a little more comfortably at times.

“I didn’t write about it much in Van Halen, but I have done a few songs that have sci-fi themes. There’s ‘Space Station #5’ on the first Montrose album,

“My opinions about the UFO stuff,” he enthused, “well, I could write a whole book just devoted to that. I love it, man. I’m into it deep.”

The MTV interviewer finally asks, point blank, “Okay, let’s just cut to the chase. I’m just going to come out and ask it. Have you ever been abducted by aliens?” “I think I have,” Hagar said. “What? Really? I was kidding. You seriously believe that?” Hagar laughed and said, “Now you’re making me sound like a crazy person.” “How is that crazy? I wasn’t there. I don’t know what happened to you.” “Remember the story in the book,” Hagar said, “where I have a dream about being contacted by aliens in the foothills above Fontana?” The MTV interviewer answers, “Yeah, yeah, I’ve got the page right here.”

The interviewer then reads aloud, “I saw a ship and two creatures inside of this ship. And they were connected to me, tapped into my mind through some kind of mysterious wireless connection.” He then asks, “You’re telling me that wasn’t a dream?” “That’s right,” Hagar responds. “It was real. Aliens were plugged into me. It was a download situation. This was

long before computers or any kind of wireless. There weren’t even wireless telephones. Looking back now, it was like, ‘F***, they downloaded something into me!’ Or they uploaded something from my brain, like an experiment. ‘See what this guy knows.’” Hagar’s decision to call the experience a dream when he wrote about it in his book is typical of abductees in many ways. The abduction experience, when it is recalled consciously and without resorting to hypnotic regression, is often thought of as being a “dreamlike” experience in spite of the fact that it is happening in physical terms. Another familiar aspect of what Hagar is talking about is the need for the UFO contactee to continue to keep the experience filed away as an “unknown,” to preserve a sense of “unreality” in his memories of the event. Crossing over to total belief is a dangerous thing for the mind to attempt, and it is fraught with more complications than the mind can easily deal with. The abductee must be content to let the memories waver in some netherworld of “real/unreal” that he can never totally resolve. The fact that the aliens “downloaded” information into his brain and also “uploaded” information out of it is often seen in abduction accounts. There is nearly always an exchange of information and data between the abductors and the abductee, though this exchange takes several different forms, occurring frequently as telepathic conversation. After again affirming the truth of the story he told, Hagar moves on to recount another experience, this time from his childhood.

Page 20 • weirdmagazine.com


Sammy Hagar and Alien

Abduction “Especially back a few decades ago,” Hagar said, “when this stuff happened to me. I couldn’t talk about it because I didn’t know how to explain it. I didn’t understand the technology. But now I’m pretty sure it was a wireless situation. Either a download or an upload.

They were tapped into my brain and the knowledge was transferred back and forth. I could see them and every-

DAWN OF THE NEW MILLENNIA

thing while it was happening. There was a visual involved, almost like . . . I don’t know. (Laughs.) Don’t get me going!”

Which seems to imply that Hagar has a lot more to talk about, to the right audience and at the right time. If an interviewer more steeped in the literature and everyday manifestations of UFOs and the alien presence were given the opportunity to interview Hagar in more detail, one can only wonder what other revelations would be brought forth. We might even learn why the occasional celebrity becomes a “Chosen One” along with the mere mortals we more often hear about. One can even ask if rock and roll is an alien invention altogether,

the electrified siren’s song from the great unknown leading us to new levels of evolutionary development. Stranger things have happened, right? Or maybe not. [If you enjoyed this article by Sean Casteel, visit his website at www.seancasteel.com The website features an article by Casteel about Bob Dylan as a possible abductee, as well as several interviews and articles about UFOs and abduction. Many of Casteel’s books are available for purchase there, including “UFOs, Prophecy and the End of Time” and “The Excluded Books of the Bible.” You can also purchase his books at Amazon.com. He has recently worked with Tim Beckley of Global Communications on two newer books, “Disclosure” and “A Round Trip To Hell In A Flying Saucer.”] - THE END

Sammy Hagar and Alien Abduction By Sean Casteel Continued . . .

“Another thing happened when I was about four,” Hagar said, “that I didn’t put in the book. One time I saw what I considered to be, well, at the time I thought it was a car with no wheels. We lived out in the country and I saw this thing floating across a field, creating this big dust storm. I threw rocks at it and s***. And I don’t know what happened after that.” “You blacked out?” the interviewer asked. “I guess,” Hagar answered. “I just have no memory of it. And that wasn’t a dream. It was during daylight.” At that point, the interviewer sympathetically says that he understand Hagar’s reluctance to talk about his experiences, acknowledging that alien abduction is a “tough sell.”

Page 21 • weirdmagazine.com


Broken Poetz Interview Interview By Max Moreno

W: Broken Poetz welcome back to Weird Mag! So lets start off by asking, since the last time you were interviewed up until this point, what has changed with the group? Whats new? BROKEN POETZ: Alot of things have changed actually, mainly the line up. We have three new members. A.B. on bass, Jesse on guitar and Arnold on drums. Basicaly thats the only thing thats different though. We just recently signed with RUBY Productionss to handle our management and produce our new record, “ Dirt Don’t Shine”. Everything else has stayed the same. We still have the same drive and determination as always. There were a couple set backs from losing members, but we are really excited about what the new members are bringing to the table!

W: So my next question has to be, where are we?! This is a really cool building.

BROKEN POETZ:This is actually our new studio/ rehearsal spot! its called Versitile Arts and its open to not only musicians but painters as well. Our friend Ray Alvarado hooked us up with this space to create and there are more rooms available. so contact any of us via myspace or facebook for more information.

W: What can you tell us about the name Broken Poetz? It seems like a very straight forward name, how did you decided on that name for the band? BROKEN POETZ: Thinking of a cool name for a band is always very difficult, when we were thinking of the name for the band we thought of a poet really being a pure artist. His main goal in life is to create poetry and to be broken inside, thats where great art comes from is pain. So we figured thats what a “broken poet” is, a pure artist.

W: I really think that people can appreciate that! You know, from seeing you guys on stage its obvious that you are influenced alot by hip-hop, but theres a big rock part to the show as well. Do you guys think that rock and hip-hop

have actually combined at this point and formed its own genre? BROKEN POETZ: As long as your really have your heart into it, art can blend really any types of music. We all come from different musical backgrounds, but when we combine that’s when we figure out how to make our sound.

Were not trying to be

put into any category we like trying out all kinds of stuff! From a love ballad one day to a heavy rock song the next! W: What about your surrounding? How, if at all, has being from the Valley influenced you guys when it comes to music? BROKEN POETZ: Were not sure that the South Texas area it self has influenced us, but all the other great bands that play in the RGValley have really motivated us to keep on trying to better ourselves. We love going out to local shows and then coming back and saying ok now let’s write some more ourselves! Its hard to come up from being in the Valley, but we realize that you have to give it your all and just keep on trying! Were proud to be from the the RGV!

W: What about down time? What are some of the things that the Broken Poetz like to do when you are not working on music?

BROKEN POETZ: Always try and put in family time of course, but also like we said go out and check out whats going on with the local music scene and just try and keep up with what are friends are up to. Support Local acts!

W: Yes! We here at Weird Mag Agree! Now tell us.... what does the Broken Poetz diet consist of?

BROKEN POETZ: Groove,brews, greens, practice, rock and roll! W: Whats currently on the Broken Poet ipod playlist?

BROKEN POETZ: The Strokes, Foo Fighters, Ace Freely, Jimi Hendrix, Pink Floyed, Sean Lennon, Kean, Born of osiris, Mud Vain, Rush, Black Sabbath.

W: Are there any shows in May? BROKEN POETZ: Yes! May 21st at smoking Aces! Everyone come out and Check us out!

W : How do we Contact you guys for info and shows? BROKEN POETZ: Brokenpoet30@yahoo.com 956 681 -0891. John Alcocer. or myspace.com/brokenpoetz

Page 22 • weirdmagazine.com


NSA Document Admits

CONTACT NSA Document Admits ET Contact By Kevin W. Smith

On October 21, 2004, the NSA approved for release to the public a portion of their NSA Journal Vol. XIV No. 1. This is a report of a presentation given to the NSA by Dr. Howard Campaigne regarding the decoding of extraterrestrial messages that had been received “form outer space”. Apparently, these messages had actually been received via the Sputnik satellite, but no one had any idea how to decode them at the time.

been given the task of decoding the messages. There were a total of 29 messages to be decoded—quite an undertaking. It is curious, to say the least, that this document was cleared for release on October 21, 2004. Why was that? Because the NSA did not release it into public information until April 21, 2011. Though cleared for release, the NSA had been stonewalling it along with hundreds of other NSA documents about contact with UFOs and extraterrestrials until they lost the lawsuit brought by Peter Gersten, a lawyer from Arizona. When they well and truly lost, the judge’s order had to be carried out, and the documents had to be released.

to the NSA on the decoding of those messages. It was actually published by the NSA in their own internal NSA Journal. Yet, they were also forced to publish a list of search terms from FOIA requests for which they had found no NSA documents. In that list is “Extraterrestrial Signals”. The title of this document, which they published themselves is “Key To Extraterrestrial Messages”. Quite obviously, they conveniently split hairs here in reporting they had no information about “Extraterrestrial Signals”. They knew for sure they had this document, and that it was about what was being requested in the FOIA request. They knew it, flaunted the technicality of wording, and continued to stonewall. Who is Dr. Howard Campaigne? Dr. Campaigne is one of the top cryptologists on the planet with years and years of service to Naval Security Group, Army Security Agency, National Security Agency, and a couple of other such alphabet organizations. Howard H. Campaigne started his crypto career for the government during World War II and has been a key and integral part of our U.S. security and intelligence ever since. In other words, he is part of a very small, very select group who are considered the cream of the crop in Cryptology.

At some time, unspecified in the document, Dr. Howard Campaigne and some other NSA super mathematicians in the crypto department had

Dr. Howard Campaigne’s “Extraterrestrial Signals” The document, as I stated, is Dr. Campaigne’s presentation

Dr. Campaigne’s presentation to the NSA on decoding the extraterrestrial messages was not a hypothetical exercise. I contacted someone who is formerly associated with the NSA and still has TS clearance, and asked him to view the document. I asked him to give me his take on it. There was no question about its authenticity since it was published in the NSA Journal, and was released by the NSA on their web site. What I wanted to know was whether this document had any particular impact or importance (other than its startling revelations) for someone familiar with the inner workings of the NSA. It did.

My contact told me that he was blown away by the wording of the document. He said that NSA communications are filled with words like “possibly” , “allegedly”, and “thought to be”. He said, “This document has none of the normal NSA disclaimer words in it. They just come out and say

‘we received messages from outer space’ and this is the way to decode those messages.” I asked, “What does that mean to you?”His reply was instant.

“Disclosure, pure and simple. They aren’t making any fanfare about it, but there it is. They have just made open disclosure.”

But what do the messages say?

Dr. Campaigne focused on a set of information in a couple of the messages that turn out to be some mathematical equations. They also contain the listing of all the elements in our Periodic Table. I suppose those equations may make some sense to a physicist or engineer, but do not mean anything to me. I clearly understand how Dr. Campaigne came to the translation since he explains it very well. But, as to what the meaning of the equations are, I could not venture a guess. It is curious, though, that during his presentation Dr. Campaigne mentions there are “words” that they have translated, and some “words” they have not yet begun to understand. He gives an example of a connective word that he knows is connective (joining two or more statements) but does not yet

understand the translation of that word. Debunkers are scared as hell of the release of this information as it proves beyond any doubt that they are, and always have been, dead wrong. Their careers as debunkers are finished in light of the revelation of this material. They are already using the only possible “tool” left to them by saying, “That’s old information. It’s been out there for years.” As usual, they are either just uninformed, or outright lying. It is true the document was cleared for release on October 21, 2004. It is true that date is from “years”. But it is also true that it WAS NOT released until April 21, 2011. “No, Virginia, that information has not been available for years.” Researching this development for my show, I have found a great deal of other information that constitutes what most people would call open disclosure. This is truly blockbuster information. No one from the government has stepped in front of the cameras and come clean about ET reality as yet. But, here we have the most secret intelligence organization in the U.S.A. , the National Security Agency, disclosing openly that there has been contact with intelligent extraterrestrials. Not only that, we have decoded their messages. Want to read the document for yourself?

http://www.nsa.gov/public_info/_files/ufo/key_to_ et_messages.pdf

Page 23 • weirdmagazine.com


Media Runs Fake Photo To Illustrate Bin Laden Death Propaganda According to some

reports, Bin Laden’s body has already been hastily “buried at sea,” meaning that the comic book story of his dramatic killing is based solely on the less than credible word of the U.S. government. Of course, it’s probable that we’ll be treated to seeing all the gory details in due course once Osama’s corpse has been properly thawed and suitably presented for public consumption. But the fake photo, which is still being used by the likes of the Daily Mail and the London Telegraph even after it was proven to be a contrived hoax that has been circulating on the Internet for years, fits perfectly with everything surrounding the Bin Laden myth – the fake video tapes, the fake audio tapes, the fake claim of responsibility for 9/11.

Media Runs Fake Photo To Illustrate Bin Laden Death Propaganda Paul Joseph Watson Infowars.com May 2, 2011 Killing Osama bin Laden is a pretty big deal. You’d think that it would be in the interests of US forces to take a snapshot of

the elusive terror leader to milk the propaganda value of such a momentous turn of events, and yet the corporate media has given us nothing but a years old fake picture. This makes little sense, unless of course, somebody is trying to hide something, namely the fact that Osama’s dead corpse has been on ice for the best part of a decade.

Everything about the Bin Laden myth that has been rapaciously whipped up by the establishment over the last 10 years has been fake, so why worry about putting out a fake photo and claiming it represents the freshly dead remains of the world’s most wanted? We don’t need MSNBC to tell us, “We think that bin Laden ‘death photo’ is a fake,” because we know it’s a fake. It’s been knocking around on the web since before Obama even took office. Here it is featured in a story released over a year

ago. As Stokes Young illustrates, the bloodied face of Bin Laden is an obviously contrived composite image created from an image of Osama that dates back over 10 years. But that didn’t stop TV news stations across the Middle East, as well as major newspapers in Britain like the Daily Mail and the London Telegraph, amongst a host of others, from passing the fraud off as evidence of Bin Laden’s death. Despite the fact that Bin Laden’s corpse has almost undoubtedly been safely stored in a highly secure U.S. government morgue since at least 2002, the political grist to be enjoyed by an administration that has plummeted to the depths of unpopularity knows no bounds, which is why Obama victoriously proclaimed Osama’s “death ” during a speech last night almost as if the president himself had pulled the trigger. The birther controversy and NATO’s indiscriminate murder of children in their pursuit of Colonel Gaddafi will now be swept under the rug and Obama can build his campaign for 2012 on the lie that he was the president who finally brought the evil boogeyman to justice. Never mind the fact that numerous public officials went on the record to plainly state that Bin Laden has been dead for years and that the announcement of his demise was being kept back until the most politically expedient time. As Kurt Nimmo and Alex Jones document, from FBI counter-

Page 24 • weirdmagazine.com

terrorism official Dale Watson, to former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, to Pakistani icon Benazir Bhutto, to CFR members, to Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf, all voiced publicly what the evidence clearly indicated, which is that Bin Laden died in late 2001. The fact that a deluge of provably fake video and audio tapes were released by an organization with direct ties to the Pentagon in the years that followed illustrated how the military-industrial complex was keen to prolong the Bin Laden boogeyman myth as a backdrop against which to launch their takeover of the middle east under the umbrella of the “war on terror”. But don’t think for a minute that final “confirmation” of Osama’s death will mean an end to the “war on terror” and U.S. troops pulling out of Afghanistan, just as the capture of Saddam Hussein did absolutely nothing to speed a U.S. exit out of Iraq. If anything, the announcement of Osama’s death will only lead to more warfare and bloodshed in the region. Whether genuine or contrived, terrorist retaliation plots are already in the works and when they are unleashed, the establishment will point to them as a justification for more air strikes, more invasions and more regime change plots disguised as humanitarian aid. In life, Bin Laden’s propaganda value as an Emmanuel Goldstein hate figure was immense, but in death his usefulness to the US military-industrial complex will, for a time at least, only increase.


MAY CROSSWORD PUZZLE

Across 1. Brownish purple 5. Large stain 12. Place on 15. Keep on hand 17. Capital of Kenya 18. ___ Kwon Do 19. Scream in excitement, say 20. Scatter all around 22. Beneficiary 24. Unfalsed 25. Keen perception 26. Female sibling, for short 27. Being cleverly skillful 30. Donkeys 32. A bone resembling a horn 34. Existence 35. An outdoor place for inmates (2 wds) 38. Freedom from concern or anxiety 41. Before, in poetry 42. Division of government 47. Charles Dickens novel with a boy named Pip 52. Prepared 53. Not me, but __ 54. Tennis star ___ Kournikova 55. 100 years 60. Low, worthless person 64. Rewards 65. Buffalo 68. Japenese Film Producer Akira ___ 70. Money of Albania 71. Cool, slang 73. Get rid of on paper 74. In the area 77. Gum flavor 81. Start a feast, say 82. __ Claire, WI 83. A quick return in speech 84. Type of oil 85. Matter 86. Weightlifters safety net 87. Singles

Down

1. express disbelief, say 2. Perfect society 3. assimilates (hyph.) 4. Reflected sound 5. Yells in agitation 6. Sheet of glass 7. Fewer calorie product 8. Metal-bearing rock 9. Rocky pinnacle 10. TV’s “eye” network 11. informed on latest trends (2 wds) 12. Wheels supports 13. Artists’ stands 14. Colorful shirts (hyph.) 16. German or Austrian emperor 21. the “weird” Great Lake 23. Not yet final, in law 27. Part of a circle

28. Genetic code (abbr.) 29. Cuban dance 31. Weapon with sharp iron head attached to a stick 32. Large company, for short 33. _____ Jacks (2 wds) 36. Male or female 37. To bring into some relation 38. Breakfast usual 39. To be 40. Aegean or Baltic 43. Iranian coins 44. Long period of time 45. ___ Arbor, Michigan 46. Home of the brave (abbr.) 48. Private investigator, slang 49. Surface swelling of plant parts 50. Pros and ___ 51. Cask for holding liquids

56. Still in box 57. Herbal or Green 58. Wild goat 59. Japanese self-defense 60. Metal rod used for grilling meat and veggies 61. Ancient Rome’s senate houses 62. The 7th planet, used in many jokes 63. Having more than anybody 66. The beginning 67. Being from a land 69. Observers 70. Being by oneself 72. Metric units of force 74. Annoying person 75. Network of fibers or nerves 76. Stanley’s dog in “The Mask” 78. Tear

79. U.K.’s mailer 80. To spoil

Page 25 • weirdmagazine.com





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