CONTENTS
FEBRUARY EDITOR in CHIEF Bianca Thomas
04. Bianca’s Corner Happy Valentine’s Day!
06. Why Women Ablaze
Co EDITOR In CHIEF/weShine Terry Briggs
We are Changing Lives!
SENIOR EDITOR Rosey Slocum PHOTOGRAPHY Rosey Slocum NaTasha Heath Zenita Askew ART & LAY OUT Zenita Askew NaTasha Heath COVER DESIGN James Ramseur FEBRUARY CONTRIBUTORS Steve Gamlin/weShine Theresa Gee Sachel Samone/Featured story Photos Samantha Meade Sandy Anderson Elliot Eddie/weShine
Snuggle Up Sandy Anderson
20.
09. James 4:8 “Come close to God,
and God will come close to you...”
Love Thy Enemies By Bianca Thomas
27. His Needs
16. Love is In the Air By Theresa Gee
18.
Fearfully and Wonderfully Made By Omega ‘I Am Auntie’ Mothersill
28.
Rising From the Ashes, On the Wings of Love! By Steve Gamlin
BLOG wesparklemag.wordpress.com E-MAIL info@wesparklemagazine.com
08. Love Like You Samantha Meade
2
No.05 | FEB 2014
10. weSPARKLE readers share their love stories
CONTENTS
Cover Story: A Love That Waits Practicing Celibacy
I
’m in a relationship with an amazing guy who I’ve known since I was a child. He was the first guy I ever had a crush on (though I NEVER admitted that to him), the first guy I ever wrote in my journal about and the first guy I ever kissed. We choose to honor the one who blessed us by doing one little thing that has such a big impact on the rest of our lives: Saving ourselves.
14. My Little Miracle Rosey Slocum
24. God’s Amazing Love Eddie Elliot
12.
26. Destinationwired.com Where You Going Matters Pastor Bryan Briggs
No.05 | FEB 2014
3
BIANCA’S CORNER
Here We Go ! significant other will do for us, and hey, don’t forget little hearts for the little ones too. What about the rest of the year? Shouldn’t we only be hospitable, thankful, giving and express love just on special days of the year? Must we always have to purchase items to convince someone that we are thinking about them or love them? I always felt that if my husband just waited to buy me gifts for Christmas, or shower me with flowers, a special dinner date and candy on Valentine’s day, I would really doubt his love for me. Besides, that’s extra money coming out of our household that I could use for something else.
S
ometimes, it seems as if our emotions and actions are more controlled by the calendar, stores, TV or the government than they are by God or our own personal convictions.
Just think about it. Many of us do not think about the spirit of thankfulness, cooking comfort foods and inviting neighbors, friends or our families over until the calendar or the television reminds us in October that Thanksgiving is near. The television and stores start advertising toys, gifts and Christmas trees right after Halloween and immediately we become a giving, joyful , and more friendlier person. Sometimes, because we are not able to financially feed into what the television says Christmas should LOOK like for us, we become depressed. Now, we are in the month that represents love. Valentine’s Day is soon to be here and once again, we will feed into the commercials. Many men will scrabble on the last day searching frantically for the perfect card, jewelry, dinner reservations and candy to make sure, they are not in the doghouse. And of course, women, we will have our high expectations of what our
Bianca Thomas 4
No.05 | FEB 2014
So why do so many of us only do special things according to the timing of the world system? From my point of view, I believe, as a Christian, that it is because we focus more on the world’s code of conduct than the kingdom of God’s code of conduct, which is more important. Yes, it may cost you more of your time, but it would save you a lot more money. I believe that love is a commitment and a lifestyle. We should always desire to give gifts, be hospitable, offer to pay for someone’s groceries, gas, show charity and have family festivities whenever we can. A commercial or the calendar should not dictate when it is time to demonstrate acts of love and kindness, but it seems as if it does and we all react like little robots. So....now we find ourselves in February, the month of love, and inside we will read some stories from couples on love, celibacy and more! May you have a HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! Enjoy!
weSPARKLE STAFF
Meet The Team
It Takes Team Work to Make The Dream Work No.05 | FEB 2014
5
WOMEN ABLAZE INTL. MINISTRIES Bianca is a Life Coach, Speaker, the visionary and founder of, B-Beautiful You , Love Encounter Intensive Workshops as well as a mother to 4 sons, Abuela to 3 grandsons and the proud wife of her knight, Grover Thomas.
Why Women Ablaze ?
Women Ablaze International Ministries
Changing Lives, Restoring Hope and Healing
T
he needs women face today are great. Many struggle with relationships, overwhelmed with the demands of life, health and weight issues, singleness, child rearing or abuse. Others are simply tired of hurting from past situations. Women walk into our churches looking for hope and many walk out with needs still unmet.
We believe women can serve and minister to one another, revealing God’s unconditional love. Women understand one another; the compassion offered in a relationship is a catalyst for healing and restoration.
We Believe every woman need to know and understand that they are lavishly loved by God, they are beautiful, they are powerful, God has destined them for greatness and as Christian women God has placed within us a blazing fire that is able to consume the darkness in the lives of others. Personal fulfillment and purpose is discovered as we mentor and ministering to one another, extending Gods presence, taking time for conversation and revealing God’s love by example. As a network of Women serving Women, Women Ablaze International Ministry is committed to create a Network of Sisterhood, by networking globally with businesses, non-profit organizations and local leaders to provide effective resources to 6
No.05 | FEB 2014
equip every woman to positively influence others in her life. Through social network and our magazine, we share inspirational stories, video interviews, products and teaching materials to assist women in living a healthy and successful life.
We will recommend to those that inquire, local churches, workshops and resources that will continually assist them to live a successful, Spiritual, Physical, Emotional and Financial productive family life.
We will help local churches understand the needs of women and provide strategies for establishing meaningful ministry to women. There is strength in numbers, therefore, We believe as a strong network of women, we can encourage, support and build up the self esteem of others as we give hope and healing to the hearts of many. Our goal is to change lives and destinies by providing friendship and a listening ear to the hurting hearts and the unheard voices.
We believe God has given us a great opportunity to Expose women to the Love and the Greatness of God through our life worship and service. We pray that you sense the call to network and partner with us, empowering women to effectively minister to others, creating healthier relationships, families, churches, and communities.
ADVERTISEMENT
JOIN 1 OF DESTINATION'S FOUR SERVICES 1. HOPEWELL CROSSINGS: Sunday 10:00 a.m 5:00 p.m. 2. SOUTH PARK MALL REGAL: Sunday 8:45 a.m 11:00 a.m.
Here at RJTMP we strive to bring to you the most creative and professional experience possible. We have a variety of services that we offer to fit your audio visual needs. Our range of services includes, but not limited to photography, video productions, audio productions, events, promotions, and much more. Chances are, I’ll not only meet your needs, but exceed your expectations.
My most popular photography services include: •Electronic Press Kit • Special Events •Film & video •Studio Rental •Music Videos •Product photography •Commercials •Family and School Photography •Sound Recording and Production •Private sessions I’m always open to new challenges. If you have a special request, I’d love to hear about it. Call or email today! (804) 835-9308 Email rjtrentmp@gmail.com
No.05 | FEB 2014
7
INSPIRATIONAL WRITINGS Samantha P. Meade is a Christian author, poet and native of Virginia. She enjoys studying the word of God and translating it into poetry for the purpose of encouraging and edifying the body of Christ. Samantha P. Meade Author
At an early age she developed a passion for writing, but did not recognize the gift God had placed within her until she received Christ in 1992. Since then, she has written numerous poems and essays that focus on the process Christians go through in our quest to imitate Christ and remain in God’s perfect will. In 2005, Samantha published a collection of poems entitled, Pressing Toward the Mark, a poetic journey with Jesus Christ, which has inspired many and has also paved the way for her second book, Journey to Jubilee, an adventure into God’s rest, due to be released in the near future. Samantha is currently a wife and mother of two and resides in the Washington DC area, where she continues to be obedient to the assignment from God to be used as a willing vessel to minister to the body of Christ through poetry. **”Pressing Toward the Mark, a poetic journey with Jesus Christ” ISBN# 1-59781-286-2 www.amazon.com
LOVE LIKE YOU, JESUS
T
here is no greater exchange between two individuals Than to share the expression of love to one another genuinely To see past the apparent and solely examine the heart I want to love others the way You love me Never attempting to gain or seek in return The affection that is given in total sincerity A desire to be in constant fellowship with each other I want to love others the way You love me Ignoring evident faults and little imperfections But greatly magnifying the positive qualities Quick to extend compassion and thinking only the best I want to love others the way You love me Forgiveness overflowing and with a grateful heart Forgetting irrelevant offenses in order to be set free Taking no thought in placing the needs of others first
I want to love others the way You love me Patience and kindness that far exceed normal expectations Grace and mercy presented in the midst of animosity Reconciliation more important than proving a wrong I want to love others the way You love me Willingness to be obedient rather than sacrifice Resisting retaliation in the face of adversity Sowing seeds of goodness in order to harvest the same I want to love others the way You love me Cleanse my heart, renew my mind and ignite my spirit So I may be a reflection of You in the highest degree My desire is to be a vessel used to pour into others The unconditional love You continuously give to me ©2013
8
No.05 | FEB 2014
INSPIRATIONAL WRITINGS Sandy lives near Richmond, Virginia. She has been happily married to her husband, Lee for 30 plus years. They have two grown daughters, Lachelle and Janelle. http://hopeandlightforthejourney.blogspot.com Sandy Anderson Blogger
orning had come, the sun was shining and M I was sitting on the loveseat, writing a devotional, my laptop was balanced
stirred by Bella’s love that you stopped what you were precariously on my lap and I was busy typing doing and touched her waiting life with your away. I glanced across the room and on the hands of blessing, so I too long to touch your couch all curled up was Bella, my Sheltie. She looked peaceful as she slept and I continued to waiting life with My hands of blessing when you choose to leave your comfort zone and write. I’m not sure what woke her up, but she jumped come where I am...with no thought for promises, no hope for blessings; just Me!” down and I remember thinking; “She must I wonder how often we spend our “quiet time” want something”. To my surprise though, she jumped up on the loveseat being anything but quiet. We come before God with our wish-list in and instead of laying at SNUGGLE UP hand and begin the other end like she James 4:8 “Come close to God, and God will come reciting it to Him and usually does, she came call it prayer. But oh how close and having nestled His heart longs for us to become so right beside me, allowing enthralled with Him that we forget to give Him virtually no space our list, because our needs and desires get lost between us; she in our heart’s proceeded to close her eyes again. passionate quest to be close to Him; not for I stopped typing and I looked down at my what He can do for us, but just to snuggle. faithful friend of six years and I thought Webster’s Dictionary describes snuggle; “to “Hmmm, she didn’t want anything-she just wanted to be close to me.” This small gesture on draw close especially for comfort or in affection.” When was the last time we snuggled her part touched my heart and I began with our Papa God? He’s waiting with a loving massaging her little furry neck, looking for a heart and open arms for us to leave our place of way to give back just a bit of her devotion. comfort, lay aside our wish list and just snuggle And it was then that Papa God spoke to me... He said “Isn’t it nice when someone just cannot up and bask in His enveloping presence. stand for there to be any distance between you Hey everyone, I’ll race you there! Get Ready, and them; that they don’t come for a blessing Get Set, GO! Ready or not Papa, here we come! from your hand, just for a closeness to your Lord, we long to be close to You in ways that heart? And when that happens, don’t you just long to bless them in any way you can, because we have yet to ask for or even dreamed of. Give us revelation knowledge of Your great love and you know that they love you for you and not how much You want us to snuggle up. Help us for what you do for them? Well that how I feel to leave our comfort zones and close the gap about My children too. I want them to temporarily forget about My blessings and just that we have heretofore been content to remain between us. Remind us to lay aside our wish want to be with Me. I long for them to refuse list and soak in Your sweet and transforming for there to be any distance between us. I desire for them to be willing to leave their safe presence. We long to seek Your heart instead of Your blessings. We do love You Father God, but comfort zones and come to the place where I am; not where my blessings are; where I am!” please help us to do it better! Amen He said; “Sandy, just like your heart was so
S
andy has a passionate desire for people to understand Papa’s unconditional love for them, to discover and walk out their unique giftings and for them to each experience an unequaled passion for Jesus Christ! Sandy is a Licensed Minister with the Assemblies of God and is active in serving at her church and in the community. She also enjoys writing and is published in various online devotional series and in her spare time she loves to read and spend time with family and friends. No.05 | FEB 2014
9
INSPIRATIONAL LOVE STORIES
M Jamie and Tracey Diehl
W
y husband Jamie and I met at a low point in my life when I was really struggling with my self-esteem thru a mutual friend. We quickly became good friends. It wasn’t until several months later that we became romantically involved that I realized God had sent him to me. After 18 months of marriage we realized that we couldn’t communicate and we took a course that the Army offered called PREP (Prevention Relationship Enhancement Program). This class was a group counseling based on the book called “Fighting for Your Marriage” by Howard Markman, Scott Stanley and Susan Blumberg. Thru PREP we learned basic communication skills that have carried us thru every conflict over the years. Jamie is the most hilarious person I know and he has this ability to make me laugh no matter how angry I am. I assure you that our home is filled with laughter. I always say that my favorite place is in his arms, there’s such a peace there that soothes me. Jamie would tell you that he loves my confidence, independence, generosity and ability to love unconditionally. When we first met he would tell me, “I want a woman that can love me just like my mom does”. I always thought this was awkward and it was many years before I realized that what he wanted was unconditional love. This June we will celebrate our 20th anniversary. Our journey hasn’t always been perfect, but it’s our story and thru it all we’ve always had each other and a well-developed method of communication with a splash of laughter.
hat makes our love so amazing is that we started off as best friends and got to know each other first. I think that is very important when you get in a serious relationship. You should also go to a family reunion and meet the family to see what you are getting into before jumping into a relationship. We met in Youngsan, Korea back in 2001 we both were in military in the same unit. When I saw this handsome guy walk into the building, I knew I had to have him. We have been friends every since. We got married in Sep 2003 and been together for 10 years! I love that he is willing to work hard , support his family and that he loves that I'm stylish and fashionable.
James and Oneika Bristol Working our dream to prosper!
M
att is without a doubt my soul mate. He is my best friend, my diary and my rock. Our relationship is a solid foundation built with a lot of laughter, growing, crazy stories and prayer! I’m forever grateful to God for leading us together. We have been together for 7 years and 3 months, we are becoming husband and wife on our 9th anniversary 10/10/15 Meet future;
Mr. Matt and Mindy Williams
10
No.05 | FEB 2014
INSPIRATIONAL LOVE STORIES
W
e are high school sweethearts and were prom king and queen. We took a vow of celibacy for 6 months before being married and have been married for 10 years. We were blessed with an unexpected blessing of our 1st born child a baby boy on
December 23, 2013 which has changed our life for the better and has brought us closer together. The key to our marriage has been attributed to our faith in God, our friendship, being quick to forgive and accepting each other for who we are without trying to change the other person.
Emanuel and Michele Craighead
W
e met in church!
I was playing bass guitar in a traveling band when my group visited my grandmother's church. My wife Melinda was in attendance at that concert. We were introduced by my grandmother and according her, she had a strong feeling about us
becoming a couple, so she began to pray for us. We made arrangements to meet and began dating soon thereafter. Eventually we were married and made a home in Prince George county. Serving the Lord and the local church has always been central to our lives. Today, we both serve alongside each other at Destination Church in Colonial Heights, Virginia.
Aaron and Melinda Mutter
No.05 | FEB 2014
11
FEATURED STORY
LOVE that WAITS
I
’m in a relationship with an amazing guy who I’ve know since I was a child. He was the first guy I ever had a crush on (though I NEVER admitted that to him), the first guy I ever wrote in my journal about and the first guy I ever kissed. We choose to honor the one who blessed us by doing one little thing that has such a big impact on the rest of our lives: Saving ourselves.
www.sachelsamone.com Photos and story by, ©Sachel Samone Photography| Destination Boudoir & Love Portrait Photographer | Based in Virginia
12
No.05 | FEB 2014
FEATURED STORY
N
ow trust me, Ethan is no saint and he most certainly is not perfect, but I love, appreciate and respect him with every fiber of my being. Our relationship is probably one of the biggest blessings I could have ever received and so with this relationship Ok, let’s be honest for a minute, refraining from premarital sex is NO easy task. When we agreed to refrain from sex and instead focus on becoming stronger in our walks, I KNEW this was going to be an uphill battle.
week and twice on Sunday. It’s a choice that I made because it was the best one for me and it’s one that so many other young people are making. This gave me a desire to want to celebrate those young people. Whether single or in relationships, there are so many people who are choosing to die to themselves daily, sacrifice their carnal desires and honor their spiritual desires. They are going against what has become the norm and choosing to be the exception. If this is you, you are EXACTLY who I am looking for. As a personal, yet very special project, I I mean seriously…look at that picture; want to highlight young women and men who are choosing to save themselves. He is SO FREAKIN’ HANDSOME!! And trust Whether you are single or if you’re in a me…the man works out so when he gives relationship (oh I especially love couples me hugs…girl listen…I’ll just say we can’t who are doing this!), I want to capture hug too long!! I’ve literally watched this you and your story in front of my lens. It human grow from a boy to man mentaldoesn’t matter if you’ve been on this ly, spiritually and yes physically. Because journey your entire life or you recently I find him so incredibly attractive both decided to rededicate yourself to Him, inside and out, this commitment is even you’ve decided to sacrifice one of the more important to me. biggest desires we as humans have for Now, neither one of us are perfect. We are something greater than yourself and you humans who have sinned and fallen short DESERVE to be celebrated! of God’s glory. Trust me, there have been nights where I have cried myself to sleep If you think you or someone you know over decisions I’ve made and regretted, deserves to be celebrated for making this but we both know we are not defined by decision, contact me! Be sure to the mistakes we have made. In fact, we include the name or names of the continue to receive God’s grace in spite of nominees, a little bit of their story, why them, which alone is reason enough to you feel they deserved to be selected and celebrate and feed the desire within to live one Bible scripture that best describes for Him. Nevertheless, as hard as some them. days can be, we see the big picture. Saving myself is more than just not having My only prayer for this project is that it sex. It’s about a peace of mind that I’m not touches others and ignites a fire in us all to willing to sacrifice. It’s about knowing that reach for a higher standard. even though I’m not pleasing my flesh, I’m I’m so excited for this! I can’t wait to read pleasing Jesus, which wins everyday of the your stories and celebrate you!! Happy Submitting!! www.sachelsamone.com No.05 | FEB 2014
13
ENCOURAGING
My Little
Miracle
I
remember the date like it was yesterday. I anxiously sat in the bathroom, on the side of the tub as my leg bounced nervously up and down. “3 minutes. It said to wait 3 minutes.” I kept repeating this to myself over and over. I couldn’t stand it any longer so I grabbed up the pregnancy test, took a deep breath and looked down. It was positive. The amount of joy that overtook my body was like no other. Zeryk (my husband) and I called everyone we knew. We were beyond excited. Our first appointment was set for July 6th, 2010 and the date couldn’t come fast enough. The day finally came and after a few hours of registration, paperwork and 14
No.05 | FEB 2014
waiting, we were finally able to go back. Our doctor started our ultrasound and the smile on her face quickly went away. I was still excited and had no idea what I was looking at but I could see a dark circle on the screen. She printed some photos and remained quiet until they were fully printed. She described to Zeryk and I how there was nothing inside of the sac where an embryo should be. She explained to us that I was suffering from something known as “Blighted Ovum” which, long story short meant that the embryo never formed and we were not going to have a baby. She instructed us that the only thing to do next was to wait for my body to miscarry the sac. When I got home, Zeryk and I lay in bed together and we cried as we held one another. I couldn’t move. The amount of pain I felt was unlike anything I had ever felt. I wondered; how could God give me this taste of a blessing only to rip it away just days later?
ENCOURAGING
“I was suffering from something known as “Blighted Ovum” which, long story short meant that the embryo never formed and we were not going to have a baby”.
CONTINUED I was sent through 2 weeks of having blood drawn to see if my hormone levels were raising and then I was due to come back to her office 13 days later on the 19th of July. This was the longest 13 days of my entire life. I tortured myself by studying the ultrasound pictures in hopes of seeing something, anything. Finally, the date came and we went back. She explained that my hormone levels hadn’t risen in the last two times of getting my blood drawn but she wanted to do one last ultrasound to see where I was progressing towards miscarrying. She turned the ultrasound machine on and I looked at Zeryk because I did not want to see the heartbreak that was waiting for us on the screen. The doctor turned on the sound to the machine and the most beautiful, melodious music filled the room. My heart dropped, tears fell from both mine and Zeryk’s eyes as we both looked to the screen to see a tiny little heart fluttering like a butterfly. I cannot even begin to describe how that felt in that very moment. Our doctor could not explain why our sweet angel was there.
She said that it made no sense and it was like nothing she had seen. She too, began to cry and we all just sat there for that moment and listened to our sweet blessing’s heartbeat. Zophelia Jade was born on March 8th, 2011 and she has been the light of our life. She has brought so much clarity and happiness to our lives and to say that she completes us is an understatement. God blessed us with another child just 15 short months after Zophelia’s birth with our sweet son, Zayne on June 19th, 2012. God has a plan for all of us and not everyone’s story will end with joy or excitement, but just know that He has you on a path and the way you choose to travel your path is what will make the difference. Every day, I am reminded that my children are gifts from God. They are here for me to nurture, love, discipline, teach and care for. Because of God’s unending love for me, He trusted me with these two wonderful miracles and I will spend my life making sure they know just how much they mean to both Zeryk and I.
Rosey Slocum
“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.” Psalm 127:3 2014
No.05 15 | FEB
INSPIRATIONAL
The Pen and the Sword “Love is in the Air”
E mine.
ven seasoned professionals have moments of absolute melt downs that cause them public embarrassment. Let me tell you about one of
One Saturday morning I awoke to the blaring of my alarm clock. Tapping the “off” button, getting up and stuffing my feet into my slippers, I shuffled to the restroom and awakened myself with the warmth of a shower. All dressed and ready to go, I realized I needed a pair of stockings for the morning prayer breakfast I would be hosting. No worries, I thought. A quick trip to Walgreens will take care of that. I had not looked at the calendar. I had not thought about the date when I was booked for the appearance. Upon arriving at the drug store, passing through the electronic doors, it hit me: Oh no, it’s Valentines Day. I felt a pain in the pit of my stomach as I 16
No.05 | FEB 2014
walked under the red and white arch made of helium filled, heart shaped balloons. I averted my eyes from the greeting cards that assaulted my view. I tried to ignore the flowers that had been set out for any last minute shopper to grab. I can get through this, I thought. I can get through this. I grabbed the stockings, paid the cashier and practically ran out of the store. I sat in the car a moment trying to steady myself. How could I have been so blind, so forgetful? How could I have accepted an engagement on this of all days? As I drove the forty mile distance to the church where I would be appearing, I tried hard to talk myself into being happy. I tried to cheer up. Instead, I felt a deep sadness envelope me and I batted away tears. I CAN GET THROUGH THIS.
INSPIRATIONAL
Theresa Gee, is one of our Celebrity Inspirational Writers. She is also a speaker, minister and actress. She can be contacted for bookings at, mssg823@aol.com Theresa Gee Speaker, Writer Actress
CONTINUED At the church I was reminded again that it was Valentine’s Day. Many women wore red that morning. Nearly all of them had husbands or dates. To make matters worse, I had a new hairstyle that I didn’t like. When a well meaning church member said, “Oh, you have changed your hair,” I was once again reduced to tears. I managed to mutter a thank you then off to the restroom I went. I tried my best to get it together before I stepped on stage. I dried my tears, re-applied my make-up, then went back into the fellowship hall to delight and amaze my audience. Quite frankly, I felt neither delightful nor amazing. I felt lonely, depressed and sad. Trust me this is NOT the way an emcee is supposed to feel. The program started and I tried to do my best song and dance routine. The feelings were not there. I couldn’t fake it anymore. This melt-down was going to happen right there on stage.
I stopped the music. I told the audience I was struggling and I began to sob big tears. I was embarrassed, speechless. I was overcome with sorrow yet I also felt if I couldn’t be real with a room full of Christians, who could I be real with? Then the most amazing thing happened: the whole church gathered around and prayed for me. They surrounded me in one big group hug. Matthew 5 says, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven… Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” I was poor in spirit that day yet I saw the Kingdom in Heaven in the love of those in the church. I was comforted by their presence, their understanding and their hugs. At the end of the program, one of the pastors presented me with a box of candy and a dozen of roses. Even though I didn’t have someone of my own then, I felt the Love of Jesus on that Valentine’s Day. Love really was in the air. Theresa Gee
The second most important commandment is this: ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” Mark 12:31 No.05 | FEB 2014
17
MOTIVATIONAL
I
know ME….. If I had to define me I would use words such as fierce, engaging, hungry (not for food) and pleasing to know. Like I stated earlier I know me. But it’s also good to know how others view you. Some have said I am dedicated, courageous, energetic and giving (but not of my food…it’s okay to laugh). All things said sounds as if I am a wonderful person, and I am. I am also what society calls plus size, fat, full-figured, chunky, fluffy, curvy, stacked, big boned, obese and big girl. I have heard them all and even have used a few to describe myself (I’m cool like that). I am confident in who I am from head to toe, so much so I started an organization called 3D Plus Modeling Troupe. In 3D you see things from multiple perspectives. I feel everything about the body of a plus size woman is enhanced three dimensionally. I always say I am building a Dynamo DIVA Dynasty (3D).
Women who society has deemed, fat, unhealthy, undisciplined, and I have even heard disgusting. They have been beat up and put down so much in mainstream media (just Google Golden Globe Awards Claireece Jones) that for them it’s hurting and debilitating. I remain humble because I know from where the hurt comes. I must be positive as a leader because everyone is watching me closely for cracks in my exterior. No one not even me, is willing to follow someone who is broke, busted and disgusted with self and life. I stay on 10 because I expect them too. I am hard on them, I critique them (in a positive way) and I reward them with gifts and kind words. Most women are not getting that on a daily bases. It’s important for me to make them feel important and larger than life (in more ways than one).
As a leader I must be transparent. Those who look up to you and attach I enjoy being the woman I am and more themselves to your vision, have to know so, I enjoy working with women who look you believe exactly what you are saying. just like me. On most days my confidence I say what I mean and I mean what I say. level is through the roof. It has to be I guard my words and I choose them when you have 40+ women looking up to carefully. But the team has a standing you. joke that I will say it! As a leader you must remain humble, positive and transparent. Humble because (and I say this next statement with all the sincerity in my being) you are dealing with women.
18
No.05 | FEB 2014
The ladies of 3D talk to me about any and everything, because they know I will keep it 100 with them. I love the trust and camaraderie within the organization.
MOTIVATIONAL
Omega ‘I Am Auntie’ Mothersill is the proud owner of; 3D Modeling Agency. She is also a Plus Model, Show Producer & Coach. To learn more about her agency, follow her at Facebook.com/omega.mothersill.1 Omega ‘I Am Auntie” Mothersill Plus Model, Owner 3D model Agency
The 3D organization started out as a concept 12 years ago when I wasn’t accepted in a modeling group. I sat on it, visited and revisited the thought numerous times (absolutely nothing). Then one thing led to another and the 3D Modeling Troupe was birth. We have models in 11 states and Brazil.
nothing you have ever experienced. I am very conscientious of the stigma that women cannot be part of a growing thriving group. We work on it daily,through chat and conference calls.
My goal is models in all 50 states and 5 countries. Let me further state the DONS are coming. So be on the lookout for a Dynamo DON Dynasty.
At the end of every organized event I have what I call a debriefing. This is the time for ONLY the ladies involved to share their comments thoughts and concerns about the event. I also call it the LAB. This is where we get it right.
Don’s will represent the Big and Tall men. 3D Plus Models boast women from PhD’s to laborers. They are from multiple ethnic, social and economic backgrounds. They range in sizes from 10-32. We have Curvy, Petite Plus, Plus and Super Plus models. They are positive and high energy.
The humble, positive and transparent leader I am makes me dig deep and I go hard for 3D. I am up sometimes 24 hours looking and searching for information, shows and model calls for them. I don’t work for me I work for them. I am constantly honing my craft and growing in knowledge. I want everyone that link up with 3D to be successful.
They can be found in pageants, newspapers, magazines, internet contest, blogs and fashion shows.
I genuinely care about the success of the team as well as each member’s success. I whole heartedly believe what John
We have tag teams, that’s where every month we switch partners and we get to know each other one on one. Women fly and drive to different locations to meet each other for the first time it’s like
Maxwell stated: “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care”. Now repeat after me… I see Only in 3D….
Psalm 139:14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works;my soul knows it very well No.05 | FEB 2014
19
DEVOTIONAL
By Bianca Thomas
I
humm! Yep, I chose to remain dead in Christ and allow the Life of God to flow in and through me! I AM REDEEMED, PRAISE THE LORD I AM REDEEMED! As I was fuming and thinking about the whole scenario during the service, I could Feeling as though I was just about to have an not tell you exactly what was preached out of body experience, when the Holy Spirit that morning if you asked, the only thing I reminded me that I was HIS anointed, called thought about was, “how can I stop feeling to be a minister and a leader in the church the way I did about my sister in Christ”? so it would not be a great witness if I would When I got home, I immediately cried out to grab this sister by the neck and choke the God for forgiveness and asked Him to help living daylights out of her! me love my sister the way He commands us to. Yes, sad to say, I had been saved for over Then, two scriptures came to my mind, I 20 years but, it was about to be a SMACK grabbed my bible and read, Matthew 5:44 DOWN right in the middle of the sanctuary. and Proverbs 25: 21-22. Proverbs 25:21-22 No one knew what was about to take place but me and the Holy Spirit. My dear sister Matthew 5:44 ..But I say unto you, Love still running her mouth, was not even aware your enemies, bless them that curse you, do of the dream I had, and how the scene we good to them that hate you, and pray for were in, ended the night before. them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; So now what? Should I just walk away like I’m scared and not defend myself, even if Proverbs 25:21-22...If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; And if he is it’s verbally? thirsty, give him water to drink; 22For you I felt like I was Nettie in Color Purple, “I’ve will heap burning coals on his head, And been taking mess off of people all my life, be the LORD will reward you. darn if I let a church folk walk all over me, OK! I’ll beat em down first” :) But THANK GOD, I The praying part was easy, because I prayed love pleasing the father more than my flesh. for this sister every time I thought about her, but the “DO GOOD” really God? That was I knew many were looking up to me for big and stretching it a bit. wisdom and counsel so physically, I As I continued reading it said, “you will heap restrained my self from retaliating and coals on their head, AND THE LORD WILL striking back like a snake. Now mentally, REWARD YOU! t was a bad shameful dream, about to become a reality. There I was, Sunday morning, stand in the church building before service, hands tingling as I was having a flashback of the dream I had the night before, was it Deja vu?
20
No.05 | FEB 2014
DEVOTIONAL CONTINUE
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through Now that’s what I needed and desired, whom we have gained access by faith into God’s favor, His reward. So I continued this grace in which we now stand. And we to worship and pray throughout the week for boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not God’s wisdom to be given to me. only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces During my personal time, He reminded me perseverance; perseverance, character; and about “Doing Good” It finally hit me, I was character, hope. And hope does not put to start buying gifts for my dear sister. Not us to shame, because God’s love has been knowing if she would take them or not, poured out into our hearts through the Holy I started purchasing little gifts weekly, from Spirit, who has been given to us. the Christian book store to give her every Sunday. If you need God’s peace, joy and love to be poured into your heart today, ask God to As the weeks went by, I started to notice forgive you for your sins and Jesus to something different about my self, I didn’t become the Lord of your life. Ask Him to fill feel any animosity, bitterness or you with His life, Love, peace and power that unforgiveness in my heart that I once felt you may freely love others as HE LOVES YOU! when I saw her. I was feeling joy, peace and freedom inside. God wants you to enjoy life, living free of the hurt and pain of this worlds cares, but the It seemed the more I gave out, the more only way you can truly do that is by God gave into me. Was this the reward He spending Quality time in his presence so He promised me, the reward for my obedience can pour His joy, peace and love into your to Him? heart through the Holy Spirit! All I know is I felt better than I’ve felt in a long time so I started doubling up on the gifts. After a month or so of blessing my sister, I was free and decided to stay free. I started purposing to walk in love and guard my heart. Even today, years later, I refuse to allow anyone but the Holy Spirit to control me or dictate my blessing of peace and joy. So, if you start getting a lot of gifts from me, guess what? I had a dream and I’m heaping coals upon your head, staying dead in Christ and living free. :) Romans 5:1-5
Matthew 11: 29-30 ”Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. ”For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Here is my blessing for you during this season as many are celebrating their love; Father, reveal yourself to those reading this message right now, May they encounter and be filled with you, the Love of my life, experiencing the amazing pleasure, of being loved by the greatest Lover in this whole world, YOU, JESUS The Christ, the Son of the Living God!
For God loved the world in this way: so much that he would give up his Son, The Only One, so that everyone who trusts in him shall not be
John 3:16
No.05 | FEB 2014
21
22
1 JOHN 3:3 See how very much our heavenly Father LOVES us, for he allows us to be called his children—think of it—and we really are! But since most people don’t know God, naturally they don’t understand that we are his children. 2 Yes, dear friends, we are already God’s children, right now, and we can’t even imagine what it is going to be like later on. But we do know this, that when he comes we will be like him, as a result of seeing him as he really is. 3 And everyone who really believes this will try to stay pure because Christ is pure.
Hello again my friends!
I
t’s February and love is in the air. Therefore, most of you probably figured that this issue of weShine would be on love. Now, whether it’s love from a significant other, the love we give and receive from our children, or just someone close to us, It just feels great to love and to be loved. I think about the love that I have for my sons and how with just the thought of those guys, sends warmth to my heart. I wonder, if this is how I feel towards my children, how great is the love that God has for each one of us as His creation, it has to be astounding? I have to say with all the self-help books I’ve read, talks I’ve given on love, and all the stories I’ve heard over the years, I still side with the Biblical definition of love as a solid foundation of truth. In 1st Corinthians Chapter 13, Love is said to be Patient and Kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it
keeps no record or wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails. Now, we are all human, and if you have failed in one of these areas towards those you love, it does not mean that you truly don’t love them, however when you catch yourself loving in any capacity less than the foundation of love, it’s at that moment where we can begin to access ourselves and work on being better. So let’s love better, harder, and with an open heart. Ok, in this issue we have some really cool and heartfelt stories on love. Author and Speaker, Steve Gamlin shares “Rising From the Ashes, On the Wings of Love!”, Writer and Speaker Elliot Eddie shares his story entitled, “God’s Amazing Love” and our sparkling ladies want to know, HIS NEEDS, “What makes a man FEEL appreciated and loved”? In closing, I’m going to leave you with something my mother have always taught me about love. That is, love others the way they want and/or need to be loved and not the way we want to love them.
With love, Terry Briggs, Co-Editor in Chief 23
weShine Warriors No.02| February 2014
Elliott
Eddie
God’s amazing
LOVE
Matthew 25:35-40
I
was hungry and you fed me, thirsty and you gave me a drink; I was a stranger and you received me in homes, naked and you clothed me; I was sick and you took care of me, in prison and you visited me.’ The righteous will then answer him, ‘When, Lord, did we ever see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you a drink? When did we ever see you a stranger and welcome you in our homes, or naked and clothe you? When did we ever see you sick or in prison, and visit you?’ The King will reply, ‘I tell you, whenever you did this for one of the least important of these followers of mine, you did it for me!
24
weShine Warriors No.02| February 2014
Elliott Eddie is an International Semi-Finalist in Toastmasters International Speech Contest 2013 and an award winning speaker. Rated as a top 27 speaker in the World by Toastmasters International, Elliott is an incredible storyteller and has developed a series of books and DVD videos to help others create more engaging stories with dynamic characters.
A
s I sit here looking out the window thinking of years past and some of the struggles that have been overcome, I am amazed. Although each New Year brings with it a new set of circumstances to overcome, God’s grace has made me the recipient of His amazing love. No matter what I may face, my God loves me and He will never leave me; even when it seems like He is nowhere around. About twenty years ago I visited Virginia from New York and fell in love with it; I felt like Virginia was the place I needed to be, so I moved. When I arrived, I had little money and little support. I did everything I knew to put myself in a position to win, but something always went wrong. Life is full of curve balls. Things went from bad to worse. I lost my job and my apartment, becoming homeless in the winter. I lived in a shelter, still attending church and believing God for a turnaround. It was a tough time. Questions plagued my mind, “why is this happening to me?” “Why isn’t God doing something to help me?” “I pay my tithes and give seeds like they told me, where is my harvest?”. I prayed and cried, fasted and sowed, but things were not getting better. However, there was one sister in my church with a heart of gold. Let’s call her Lady B. Somehow she convinced her husband to let me live with them. As a married man now thinking back, I wonder what I would say if my wife said to me, “Honey, there is a young (grown) man I know who is living in a shelter. I know he’s ruggedly handsome, but I would like him to come live with us- even though you are out of town for days at a time working.”
Actually that’s not true, I know exactly what I would be thinking. Well, this brother agreed with his wife and they opened their home to me. Twenty years later and we are friends and I love them both. They were there for me when I was in need, and asked nothing of me except to believe in Jesus (and dry the water out of the sink after I used it). I will never forget them. We often don’t realize the depths of God’s love while we are experiencing pain. Yes, life is hard but God does supply what we need when we need it. We just have a different idea of what we need at the time. I would have said I needed a house, but God gave me a home. Our Father put me around a man who displayed what a man does for his family and for his community. I saw the love of God flowing through people. But it wasn’t until years later when I looked back that I saw how God kept me, when at the time I was positive He was ignoring me. When I made bad decisions, He didn’t change them around; I had to live with the consequences, but God was still there comforting me through the pain and showing me a better way forward when it was over. So keep your chin up. Focus on the love God has shown you and share that love with others. Life is not full because we have a bevy of material things. Life is full when your heart is full of love for your fellow human being like God’s heart is full of love for you.
25
Pastor Bryan Briggs and his Wife Kelly, are senior pastors of one of the top youngest and fastest growing church in the United States. Vistit destinationwired.com for more info.
weShine Warriors No.02 | February 2014
To enjoy the complete message, VISIT: http://vimeo.com/85719153 NOTE FROM EDITOR: This is just a excerpt of the message that was taught Sunday, February 2, 2014 by Pastor Briggs, at Destination Church in Hopewell and Colonial Heights, Va. To try and captivate the powerful spirit that was in the service that morning would do it great unjustice if I would try and print the complete notes here, but because of the impact this simple yet thought provoking message made on over 1600 people that attended that morning, I just had to share it. This is part one of a four part series. ENJOY!
This is a New Series called, LOVE, SEX, and DATING Why? Because “I want you to have great relationships and believe in marriage”. Who is this messagefor- single, dating, divorced, married, living together. Who’s this NOT for – Recreational Daters or the player: but one day you will need this. Why care? Because, All of life is connected, you carry yourself with you wherever you go
What you are doing now RIGHT PERSON MYTH: will eventually be your past If I meet or marry the right & your past will show up in person everything will be ok! future. Do you know how married Why? I’ve never met a couple with marriage problems but problems in marriage. Individuals with problems get married, problems that started when they were single. Many, when get married think, when then say “I do” they hit a reset button. Truth: you bring your past into your marriage & it can destroy its future Problem: Too many buy into
the myth that is popular in music, movies, books. 26
people realized they met the right person?
Chemistry! “I can’t stop thinking about them, I can’t keep my eyes of them or things” They decided on the right person based on Chemistry and Chemistry pushed them romantically. Then decided, “You always test drive a car before buying it right?” So dated more, spent nights together, moved in together, maybe got married, then after a few months, the past problems started to tear away at that chemistry.
Truth:Too many build their relationships on chemistry instead of intimacy! Then to fix bad relationship, usually the woman has an idea how to fix it, have a baby! Single, want know why married people are laughing nervously? it’s their story We think our stories are unique “No one loves like we do” is not unique. Singles/Married–only way to avoid this is not to buy into the Right Person Myth! ONE THING TO KNOW: It’s not about meeting the right person it’s about becoming the right person ONE THING TO DO: “To become the right person you must become like Jesus”. To become like Jesus you must be close to Jesus.
weShine Warriors No.02| February 2014
ISBN-13: 9780800719388
EXCERPT: From His Needs, Her Needs by W. Harley, Jr.:
Because men try to meet needs most important to men and
women try to meet needs most important to women, a couple can easily become confused and fail to meet each other’s real needs. When the best efforts of man and woman are unappreciated and their own needs are not met, they often give up trying. If they had only directed their efforts in the right places, they would have been effective and appreciated. These are ten of the most important needs in marriage. All of these categories may not apply to your marriage, but they can help you begin a discussion with your spouse to identify the needs you should learn to meet. On the line next to each need, place a number from 1 to 5 in the order of importance for you.
A man’s five most important needs in marriage tend to be: _____ Admiration (Respect). She understands and appreciates him more than anyone else. She reminds him of his value and achievements and helps him maintain self-confidence. She is proud of him, not out of duty, but from a profound respect for the man she chose to marry. _____ Domestic Support. She creates a home that offers him a refuge from the stresses of life. She manages household responsibilities in a way that encourages him to spend time at home enjoying his family. ____ Physical attractiveness. She keeps herself physically fit. She wears her hair, makeup and clothes in a way that is attractive and tasteful. He is attracted to her in private and proud of her in public. _____ Recreational companionship. She develops an interest in the recreational activities he enjoys most and tries to become proficient at them. If she finds she cannot enjoy them, she encourages him to consider other activities they can enjoy together. She becomes his favorite recreational companion, and he associates her with his most enjoyable moments of relaxation. ____ Sexual fulfillment. His wife meets this need by becoming a terrific sexual partner. She studies her own sexual response to recognize and understand what brings out the best in her; then she shares this information with him, and together they learn to have a sexual relationship that both find repeatedly satisfying and enjoyable. Willard F. Harley, Jr., is a nationally acclaimed clinical psychologist, a marriage counselor, and the bestselling author of numerous books, including Five Steps to Romantic Love, Love Busters, and His Needs, Her Needs for Parents. His popular website, www.marriagebuilders.com, offers practical solutions to almost any marital problem.
27
weShine Warriors No.02| February 2014
Rising From the Ashes, On the Wings of Love!
I
f excessive failure makes victory taste sweeter, I must have doubled the dose, because I now enjoy a most delicious life. In 2003, however, it was a bitter buffet. I had just abandoned a successful radio career, struggled through a divorce, and discovered I was $65,000 in debt. Crash and burn: a perfectly executed cannonball into the fire. My beautiful tail feathers went up in smoke. I crawled home to family, marinated in misery, and struggled to emerge from the embers. For comfort, I poured my thoughts into a daily journal, and slowly started to work toward healing. By January 2007, I was back on my feet with a successful speaking career, but my heart truly missed being in love. I learned about Vision Boards through Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret, so I cobbled together a collage of goals, hopes, and dreams. I included pictures of couples walking hand in hand on a beach, enjoying a sunset at the railing of a ship, and so forth. As Winter turned to Spring, a feeling crept in: What if I already knew her? During the first week of June, I picked up my journal and wrote, “I am ready to fall in love.” On June 16th, an e-mail arrived that looked like spam. I reached for the delete key but then decided to take a chance. It was from a woman named Tina, one of my best friends in high school. Aside from a brief “hello” at a restaurant 15 years prior, we had not been in touch for more than 2 decades. She now lived in Florida, 1300 miles away. She told me
28
she’d been perusing the Classmates.com website and my name caught her eye. The next e-mail included her phone number, which I worked up the courage to call several days later. She laughed and said, “It’s about time you called!” Over the next few days, we filled each other in on the past 21 years and I recalled the crush I’d had on her back then. Several weeks later, I had a job as a wedding DJ. Once there, I sent Tina an email to say I’d arrived safely. We traded many emails that day. Eventually, as she relaxed in a bubble bath with a glass of wine, she asked if she could be honest with me. Then she shared her most important message yet. “Here is how I felt about you in high school, when I saw your name on-line, when you answered my first e-mail, when you finally called me, and how I feel right now: Love . . . love . . . love . . . love.” Before I could reply, the event manager beckoned from across the room. “Time to cut the cake!” The next 7 minutes seemed like an eternity. Finally, I was able to share my feelings by return message. The feeling we had in common was love. When I first created that vision board, I never expected a second chance to express the feelings I was too shy to share with Tina in high school. Several days later, she called with wonderful news: “I’m coming back to New England to visit my grandmother in August. We’ll get to be together for a couple days!”
weShine Warriors No.02| February 2014
Steve Gamlin Speaker/Author Provider of Motivational Firewood www.SteveGamlin.com
I had speaking and DJ events booked for that weekend, but I knew that the free moments we’d have would be magic. I had spent all summer falling in love with my eyes closed and my heart wide open, and I was going to appreciate any time I could spend with her! I offered to pick her up at the airport and she accepted. Despite my best efforts, I arrived a few minutes late, sprinting into the terminal just as she entered. My heart leapt as my eyes found hers, still sparkling blue. It was a magical weekend. On Saturday, we knew my work would keep me out of town for 14 hours. She asked if I would return to her that evening in my tuxedo. I shook my head slowly. It was almost a 4-hour drive, each way. “After such a long day of driving and working, there’s no way. Sorry, honey.” But then, of course, I did. How could I not? After arriving at her hotel, I asked if she wanted to dance. “Why?” she asked. “Because I never asked you back in high school.” What followed still ranks as the most romantic hour of my life. We danced to a playlist of songs I had chosen that touched my heart—and now hers. Driving back to the airport on Monday, I felt my heart breaking into pieces. Being so in love, and so new, it didn’t seem fair. “I miss your smile already,” was my text message to her from the
parking lot. “I wish we could be together aways,” she immediately replied. Sometimes the universe takes a little longer to engage than we wish to endure. In the ensuing months, however, Tina was offered a job transfer back to New England, about a 2-hour drive from my home. We spent most weekends together, and after subsequent job promotions and opportunities over the next 6 years, we are in the same city together at last. Today, Tina travels often for work, but I always know I am just days away from holding the hand of the woman I dreamed of with my Vision Board. And after nearly 7 years together, the story of our romantic reunion is the one I enjoy re-living most on the stage. The best part: Tina and I have held hands on a beach, and we have stood at the railing of a ship at sunset. We treasure every day that we get to spend building our dream life: soul mates reconnected, born of a wish handed out to the universe, flying high on feathers that shimmer in the sunlight, far above the flames of failure. The phoenix brought me somewhere very special. Life has never tasted so sweet. We must know what we seek, make ourselves ready, and recognize the opportunities, always!
29
30