Whitman Pioneer Spring 2012 Issue 7

Page 1

E WH TH

The

CUT TIME

R

ecently faculty decisions have motivated a desire amongst students to become more involved in Whitman’s hiring process. The dance department is no exception. The decision not to renew Instructor of Modern Dance Vicki Lloid’s contract has provoked surprise and concern from Whitman students involved in the dance department. The department is currently entering a transition period; current Ballet Instructor Idalee Hutson-Fish will be retiring after this school year, and the administration has hired Peter De Grasse to take her place. The search for a tenure-track position in dance will soon begin, as part of the plan to create a dance major and minor at Whitman. In light of depar t ment changes, Provost and Dean of Faculty Timothy Kaufman-Osborn will be sending a letter out to students enrolled in dance classes to detail the courses being offered next year. Beginning and intermediate courses will continue as before, but advanced ballet and advance modern will be combined into one advanced course. Each of these courses will remain a one-credit activity course. The department will also offer a four-credit course with a more academic focus called “Dance Performance and Composition”. “This is a time of change in the college’s program in Dance. We are grateful for the long service of Vicki Lloid and Idalee Hutson-Fish, and we are excited to have Peter de Grasse come to Whitman next year and to be able to offer academic credit in Dance for 2012-13. The following academic year, 2013-14, promises even more growth for the program,” KaufmanOsborn said in an email. Lloid heard of the decision not to rehire her on Wednesday, Feb. 15 when she had gone to a meeting with Provost and Dean of Faculty Timothy Kaufman-Osborn about an entirely different subject. She was not expecting the news. The administration declined to comment on the reason she wasn’t hired back. When Lloid told students in her modern dance classes about the hiring decision, many were surprised. Junior Hensley Fradkin was especially taken aback. “Vicki and I have developed a friendship. When she told us she was fired, I was devastated. I couldn’t believe it,” she said. First-year Mcebo Maziya was especially surprised that Lloid’s dismissal occurred after so many years of service to the school. “Everyone was in shock. She’s an asset to the college and a skilled choreographer. She has single-handedly created the modern dance program at Whitman,” he said. Fradkin and several other students have written a letter addressed to Kaufman-Osborn, President George Bridges and Division Two Chair Rebecca Hanrahan. They have also set up a meeting with Kaufman-Osborn for this Friday, March 9 to express their concerns. “I want to be careful about what we’ve said because we’re not attacking the administration. We just want to understand [their decision] better,” Fradkin said. Students are particularly concerned with the manner in which this decision was made.

Sophomore Geneva Bahrke wished that students were more involved. “I feel that the lack of involving students and [current] faculty in the creation of a dance major is disrespectful and it hurts the development of the department,” said Bahrke. Senior Emily Hanscam compared hearing about Lloid’s dismissal to finding out the Varsity Ski team was going be cut her during her first year. “The department is undergoing a transformation without student input, and the process is done i n a sudden and quiet way,” she said. Kaufman-Osborn emphasized that the department’s changes will lead to more academic course offerings in dance. “As we build on this first step in future years, the Dance program will attract not only students who wish to perform, but also students who are interested in dance as a subject of academic inquiry,” he said. Though they feel that adding a more academic focus could strengthen the department, both Lloid and her students are skeptical of the possibility of creating a dance department with only one instructor. “[It] means that there is more specialization and less opportunity for students to experiment in areas they haven’t had a chance to look into,” Lloid said. “For instance, students at Whitman have the opportunity to perform in a dance show, which can teach them a lot about themselves. I don’t know if where they’re headed is going to make the arts less accessible to students. It seems like that’s what they’re doing, that they want to make the arts more an academic pursuit and less a living art pursuit.” Fradkin feels that dancers could have difficulty expanding their dance vocabulary. “It would be great to draw a different group of people to Whitman, but my question is: How do we have a diversity of classes with just one style?” Ultimately, Fradkin and several other students hope the administration consider give Lloid the opportunity to work with De Grasse during this transitional period for the program. “I’m excited for the new program, but concerned that the sudden firing of Vicki shows a break from what’s currently happening, which is a good program,” said sophomore Kari Paustian. Senior Chapman Strong also feels that the new program should incorporate elements of the old program. “I think establishing a dance major is a great thing and it could bring diversity with new people, but that doesn’t mean we should eliminate the program we have already. They should build off of each other,” he said. Patrick Henry, a retired faculty member, said that keeping Lloid on staff during the transitional phase would benefit the program’s future growth. “Peter De Grasse will be an excellent addition to our dance program, but Vicki should be retained at her halftime level to work with Peter, show him the ropes and take the program to the next level,” he said in an email. In their letter they wrote to the administration, students

18 9 6

ISSUE 7 | March 8, 2012 | Whitman news since 1896

Adjunct music instructors work long hours for low pay, uncertain benefits by RACHEL ALEXANDER Senior Reporter

L

aura Curtis has been teaching piano at Whitman since 1997. She holds a master’s degree in music, instructs around 35 students per semester and is often

also e m phasize L l o i d ’s cross-disciplinary style as an example of the liberal arts values Whitman strives to have. They feel that these values are an important contribution to the department. It reads: “Rather than direct her classes towards the most experienced students, Vicki creates classes that bring together students of various dance backgrounds and levels of technical skill, while still challenging both types of students effectively, a perfect application of the principles of a liberal arts college which aims to foster a wide range of personal growth.” Tess Gallagher, a poet who has worked with Lloid in many different performances, also cites Lloid’s approach to dance as truly collaborative. “The students got to meet poets, musicians and artists in Vicki’s sweeping control of multiple mediums. They learned how these various elements could be BERFIELD

News Editor

EX AMICITIA VERITAS

INSTRUCTORS WITH NON TENURE-TRACK POSITIONS WORK AT WHITMAN WITH NO JOB SECURITY; DANCE, MUSIC DEPARTMENTS FACE REPERCUSSIONS

Sudden dismissal of dance instructor causes concern by KARAH KEMMERLY

AN ONEER PI

PIONEER

M IT

woven into movement and overlapping voices and appearances. Their enthusiasm was so refreshing. Everyone seemed caught up in the dream of what was being given,” she said in an email. Maziya and many other dance students hope that their voices will be heard. “It’s concerning that we’re the last to know while it affects us students most.”

busy from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. with lessons, rehearsals, practicing and accompanying. For this, Curtis can expect to earn a little more than $20,000 per year from Whitman. Curtis is one of Whitman’s music teaching assistants: instructors who are hired on a per-semester or per-year contract basis to teach private lessons. Currently, students pay $300 per semester per credit of instruction, with one credit equal to a half-hour private lesson per week over the course of the semester. Music assistants receive $264 per credit they teach. The remainder of the fee covers employer related payroll costs such as social security, Medicare and worker’s compensation. An instructor with teaching 40 half-hour lessons is considered to be employed full-time by the college, and would earn a salary of $21,120 before taxes. Susan Pickett, chair of the music department, explained that although an instructor working full time would only have students 20 hours a week, many instructors have other time commitments as part of their job. Group lessons, unpaid accompanying and preparation for recitals all take up substantial portions of time for many faculty members. “That is, by custom, part of the job of teaching music,” she said. “These group recitals and classes are an extra part of the work.” These extra pieces of work can add up. Music assistant Robyn Newton said that during the first two weeks of the semester, she often works from 8:30 a.m. to 8:30 p.m. because she has to find music and recordings for all of her students. On top of these hours, Newton has worked other jobs during the 13 years she’s taught at Whitman. She used to work from 7:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. as an optician, then come to Whitman and teach voice from noon until 6 p.m. “Most adjuncts have two jobs,” she said. “It’s not something that you can really make a living doing. The only reason you would do it is because you love it so much.” Provost and Dean of Faculty Tim Kaufman-Osborn explained that Whitman’s fee rates are designed to be competitive with similar colleges. “We really try to rely on what similar institutions are offering,” he said.

Walla Walla University currently offers music instructors $350 per semester, and all but one other Panel of 14 school currently offers more than Whitman’s $300. Pickett said that largely because of this, Whitman is planning to ra ise music fees to $350 starting in the fall 2012 semester. Of this, instructors will receive $310 per credit taught. Kaufman-Osborn said that setting music fees is complicated, because charging too much might keep students from being able to take lessons. However, he acknowledged that paying faculty and staff a fair wage is important to the college. “Leaving aside all of the complications of teachers of musical instruments . . . if Whitman is not paying a living wage to someone, then I think in principle that’s a problem,” he said. Not all music assistants work full time for Whitman. Many instructors teach less common instruments, such as oboe and French horn, and have only a handful of students. Some only work for Whitman for a few semesters. But regardless of how

less the same contract. “The exact same policy applies to someone who’s worked [at W h i t m a n] for 12 y e a r s , ” said Curtis. Kaufman-Osborne said that paying instructors more based on their experience would further complicate the fee system. He acknowledged that the current flat fee system could be seen as unfair to some instructors who have been at the college for years. “It’s a legitimate question,” he said. As part of their agreement, music assistants teaching at least 30 credits are eligible for benefits on a prorated basis with 40 lessons being 100 percent full-time. At 40 lessons, Whitman would pay 100 percent of the employee’s health insurance premium. The number of credits an instructor is teaching is calculated based on enrollment on the tenth day of the semester. Any instructor who is below the 30-credit minimum on this day would lose health insurance coverage for the semester. Curtis lost her insurance coverage once,

NOTABLE

NUMBERS

$300 $264 $21,120 30 75 44

Current student music fee per credit (one half-hour lesson).

Amount of this fee an instructor receives.

Amount that an assistant music instructor working full time (40 credits per semester) currently earns in a year, before taxes.

Number of credits an assistant instructor must teach to be eligible for health insurance.

Percentage of full-time hours an assistant music instructor must teach to be eligible for health insurance.

Percentage of full-time hours an adjunct professor in a different department must teach to be eligible for health insurance.

$350

Music fee starting fall 2012. many students they have, their level of education or the number of years they’ve worked for Whitman, all assistants sign more or

a few years into her career at Whitman when she dipped below 30 credits for one semester.

see MUSIC, page 2


NEWS

Mar

08 2012

PAGE

2

Kurt Othberg presents addressess Walla Walla’s Sustainability Committee with his questions about the glass recycling program. The committee will deliberate on the issue in April. Photo by Bernstein

Walla Walla to shatter glass recycling by EMILY LIN-JONES Staff Reporter

S

hould Walla Walla do away with glass recycling? This was the question presented to attendees of a Sustainability Committee meeting on Tues., March 6 at the Walla Walla City Hall. The committee accepted public comment regarding the current glass recycling program and resolving to bring concerns and ideas from the community before the City Council to assist in their upcoming decision for the program. “The sustainability committee vetted [the program] over the course of about six months last year and determined that the current program really is not sustainable by any definition of the word: economically, environmentally, or [from a] social equity standpoint,” said Sustainability Coordinator Melissa Warner. The city of Walla Walla removed glass from its curbside collection program in 2008, instead placing several drop-off points for glass products around town. Since then, the city has collected almost 1000 tons of glass from

these depots, all of which has been brought to the Sudbury Landfill to be crushed and used as stabilizer for asphalt roads. In past years, the city sent the glass on to a bottle manufacturer in Portland, but rising gas costs and low market value for glass have made this economically infeasible. “The glass market is low and very stagnant. It has been for probably the last 20 to 25 years. There’s not really been any kind of incentive for the glass manufacturing industry to purchase that material, particularly from jurisdictions like [Walla Walla] who have a collection [they] need to get rid of,” said Warner. Walla Walla is not the only community in Washington struggling with an excess of empty bottles; Spokane, with a population nearly eight times that of Walla Walla, has also been stockpiling its glass over the past few years. In the nearby city of Yakima, glass is ignored by the local recycling system and ends up in the dump with other garbage. In Walla Walla, the inconvenience of having to transport glass to collection spots

Senator Murray’s Eastern Washington Director visits Walla Walla community by PATRICIA VANDERBILT Editor-in-Chief

A

group of around 20 Walla Walla Democrats gathered in the First Congregational Church tonight, March 6, to meet with John Culton, the Eastern Washington Director for U.S. Senator Patty Murray. The meeting was moderated by Walla Walla city council member Barbara Clark. Culton traveled to Walla Walla to hear the concerns of Walla Walla community members on behalf of Senator Murray. He is one of six regional directors in Washington State, and serves 12 counties in Eastern Washington. Many at the meeting expressed dissatisfaction with government spending, particularly in regards to the Department of Defense budget. Senator Murray serves on the Senate Budget Committee as well as the Defense Subcommittee within the Appropriations Committee. “I got a real sense of frustration with how much we’re spending with defense. . . in regards

to how much we’re spending on social services,” Culton said. “That is the crux of what I think this conversation was about.” Several present also discussed their frustration with United States funding of Israel and concerns over escalating tensions between the United States and Iran. The prominence of corporate lobbying in politics was also a major concern. Culton said that he would relay the topics of discussion to Senator Murray’s policy advisers, and added that he was happy to see a community of Democrats in Walla Walla. He has tentatively scheduled a return to Walla Walla Thursday, March 22, as part of an ongoing effort to connect with Murray’s constituents in Eastern Washington. Culton was also interested in the possibility of a roundtable between Senator Murray and Walla Walla community members. “That this has been productive for you, I think that’s the biggest thing,” Culton said about the meeting.

discourages many businesses and community residents from participating in the system. “If I had to guess, the majority of glass in this community is already going into the landfill,” said Sustainability Committee member Sandra Cannon. Some local business owners agreed that Walla Walla city policy has given them little incentive to go to the effort of recycling glass. “The problem that we’ve had over the years is that [glass recycling] has been inconsistent. It’s allowable at times, and then they shut it down . . . It’s so inconsistent we just kind of dropped it,” said Jim Moyer, owner of Fort Walla Walla Cellars. Ron Williams of Waterbrook Winery felt similarly. “The great tragedy is that Walla Walla does not [collect] glass. . . We occasionally try to take a truckload to the recycle [depot]. Even in that case they’re not recycling, they’re reusing,” he said. Williams noted that while wineries currently have no financial incentive to recycle their glass, the moral incentive still exists. “I think more wineries in Walla Walla would really get behind [recycling] just because of the demographic. Many of us come from places where recycling is incredibly normal, so

it’s weird to come someplace where you can’t recycle,” he said. At the Sustainability Committee’s meeting, residents came to present their own ideas about the program. Among the proposed solutions were downtown glass art installations and campaigning for a statewide “bottle bill” which would require a refundable deposit on all plastic or glass bottles. City Council member Barbara Clark said she was encouraged by the strong community presence at the meeting, and hoped to receive more public feedback in the future. “From my own perspective, the usefulness of having people [at the meeting] is that there are always a few members of the council who think, why should we bother with recycling at all?” she said. “It is useful for the council to see that a lot of members of the public really want to see recycling happen and would like the city to at least keep looking into possibilities for recycling.” Walla Walla resident Kurt Othburg said he makes use of the current glass recycling system and hopes to see it continued in some form. “We’re dedicated glass recyclers. We’ve liked this program since they started it four years ago . . . I think it’s a good idea [to recycle glass], especially because [Walla Walla] is the wine capi-

Music instructors’ health insurance not guaranteed from MUSIC, page 1

“I couldn’t even keep my policy intact and pay for it myself. There was no option,” she said. “It bothered me that there was absolutely nothing [Whitman was] able to do to help me out, even though I had taught there full time since ‘97, knowing that I was not leaving, that I wanted to continue to teach, that I wanted to have full time work.” Not wanting to lose coverage again, she opted to enroll on her husband’s insurance. However, he will turn 65 in five years, which will change his insurance to Medicare and will not cover Curtis. She said that at that point, she will probably have to go back to the Whitman plan. Pickett said that in an ideal world, she would like to see Whitman offer music instructors the option of prorated insurance premiums so that part-time instructors would have some contribution by Whitman toward health and

dental insurance, even if they fall below 30 credits in one semester. However, she knows that Whitman is unlikely to change this policy. “It would be a very expensive proposition,” she said. Curtis believes that Whitman could find the money to pay music assistants or cover their benefits. It’s a reflection of priorities,” she said. Pickett noted that the role that music assistants play in college life is often overlooked. “I think all of us at Whitman. . . students and administration alike, need to fully appreciate with almost every public event, the music department is called on to provide music,” she said. “Our contract teaching staff represent a major force in the quality of those performances.” Senior Carissa Wagner, a music major, said that private lessons help students get involved with music on campus. “The way that most peo-

PRODUCTION

WRITING

BUSINESS

Editor-in-Chief Patricia Vanderbilt

Production Manager Ted Hendershot

NEWS

Business Manager Hailun Zhou

Managing Editor Cara Lowry

Production Associates Katie Berfield, Sean McNulty Madison Munn, Molly Olmsted, Cara Patten, Allison Work

PIONEER

EDITORIAL

News Editors Karah Kemmerly Shelly Le A&E Editor Caitlin Hardee Sports Editor Libby Arnosti Feature Editors Alyssa Fairbanks Kelsey Kennedy

Copy Editors Aleida Fernandez Marisa Ikert

FEATURE

Web Editor Sara Rasmussen

ILLUSTRATION

SPORTS

Opinion Editor Alex Brott Humor Editor Cari Cortez

PHOTOGRAPHY

Illustration Editor Binta Loos-Diallo

A&E

Circulation Associate Emily Coba

WEB TEAM

Alex Bailey, Ariel Carter-Rodriguez, Kelly Douglas, Ruth Hwang Emily Johnson, Julie Peterson, Erika Zinser

Photography Editor Ethan Parrish

Rachel Alexander, Allison Bolgiano, Amy Hasson, Molly Johanson, Emily Lin-Jones, Julia Stone Clara Bartlett, Nathan Fisher, Alex Hagen, Mallory Martin, Ellie Newell

Chief Copy Editor Jean Marie Dreyer

cade beck, Caitlin Bergman, Faith Bernstein, Allie Felt, Halley McCormick, Chaoyu Li, Nicholas Farrell

tal of the state. Can you imagine wine in plastic bottles?” he said. Other residents have a personal stake in the recycling program. “When I was in college I helped canvas to get a bottle bill on the ballot, but outside money from bottle manufacturers outspent the public and got it defeated. I’d like to see [the city] recycle more. I want to leave our kids a better planet, rather than lots of overfilled landfills,” said resident Beth Powers, also present at the meeting. Whitman students also had ideas for the future of glass processing in Walla Walla. “It would be cool if Whitman offered jobs related to cleaning out bottles [for reuse]. If you could get students volunteering their time that would make things a lot easier,” said sophomore Jenny Gonyer, who lives at the Outhouse and recycles weekly. At present, however, no practical solutions seem imminent and the glass reuse program is still in jeopardy. “Nothing’s really on the immediate horizon to find a different, better solution,” said Warner. The council will deliberate on the issue in April and implement their decision in May. In the meantime, they will continue to accept comments on its website through March 20.

Samuel Adler, Susanna Bowers, Molly Emmett, Talia Rudee, Kinsey White

Webmaster Kirk Crosland

Web Content Editor Josh Goodman

Peter Clark, Sarah Debs, Kyle Howe, Pamela London, Sylvie Luiten, Matt Tesmond

ADVERTISING

OPINION

Advertising Associate Will Martin, Woodrow Jacobson

Sam Chapman, Blair Frank, Sandra Matsevilo, Nathan Ord, Kyle Seasly, Julia Stone

BACKPAGE

Elena Aragon, Tabor Martinsen, Theo Pratt, Dana Thompson, Bridget Tescher

Advertising Manager Hannah Bauer

For information about advertising in The Pioneer or to purchase a subscription please contact business@ whitmanpioneer.com.

ple get involved with the department outside of music majors is performance,” she said. Junior Madelyn Peterson is one of the many non-music majors who have benefited from having music assistants available. “Music has always been a really big part of my identity,” she said. “When you’re working with your teacher, you’re really listening to the nuances of the piece you’re working on. That’s when music really comes alive to me.” Peterson believes that the contribution these teachers make is often undervalued. “I think music teachers at Whitman work really hard. They care about the work they do,” she said. Newton said that although she often works long hours, she appreciates being able to teach college students. “We get paid very little for doing a lot of work,” she said. “It’s a good thing we love what we do.”

EDITORIAL POLICY

The Whitman College Pioneer is a weekly student-run newspaper published under the auspices of the Associated Students of Whitman College. The purpose of The Pioneer is to provide pertinent, timely news and commentary for Whitman students, alumni, faculty, staff and parents, as well as the Walla Walla community. The Pioneer is dedicated to expanding open discussion on campus about the issues with which students are most concerned. We provide coverage of Whitman-related news as well as featured local and regional events, and strive to maintain a standard of utmost fairness, quality, and journalistic integrity while promoting freedom of the press. In addition, The Pioneer strives to be a learning tool for students who are interested in journalism. The Pioneer welcomes all feedback and publishes weekly Letters to the Editor in print and online.

SUBMISSION POLICY

Letters to Editor may be submitted to The Pioneer via email at editors@ whtimanpioneer.com or sent to The Pioneer, 345 Boyer Ave., Walla Walla, WA, 99362. All submissions must be received by 4 p.m. on Saturday prior to the week that they are intended to appear. All submissions must be attributed and may be edited for concision and fluency.

CODE OF ETHICS

The code of ethics serves as The Pioneer’s established guidelines for the practice of responsible journalism on campus, within reasonable interpretation of the editorial board. These guidelines are subject to constant review and amendment; responsibility for amending the code of ethics is assigned to the Editor-in-Chief in conjunction with the editorial board. The code of ethics is reviewed at least once per semester. To access the complete code of ethics for The Pioneer, visit whitmanpioneer.com/about.

The


NEWS

Mar

08 2012 NUMBERS

IN THE NEWS by SHELLY LE

Number of people in Franklin County, Ohio who turned up to vote in the Republican Primaries in 2008.

2,712

Number of people in Franklin County, Ohio who turned up to vote in the Republican Primaries last Tuesday.

56

Percentage of all Republican delegates presidential candidate Mitt Romney has allocated after the 2012 Super Tuesday Republican primaries.

59

Percentage of all Republican delegates former presidential candidate John McCain claimed after the 2008 Super Tuesday Republican primaries.

$12,122,704

Money spent on President Barack Obama’s presidential re-election campaign, including spending since 2008.

$55,986,173

Money spent on Mitt Romney’s presidential campaign.

$5,224,376

Money spent on presidential candidate Rick Santorum’s campaign.

$824,305.46 Amount raised from July 1, 2011 to December 31, 2011 by Stephen Colbert’s SuperPAC Americans for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow. SOURCES: FRANKLIN COUNTY BOARD OF ELECTIONS, NATIONAL PUBLIC RADIO, THE NEW YORK TIMES.

3

Club seeks to improve job prospects

News Editor

6,776

PAGE

by AMY HASSON

F

Staff Reporter

inding a job post-graduation can be more difficult than finding an open table at the library during finals week. With the right connections and an entrepreneurial approach however, Whitman students might be able to create their own jobs and turn their passions into a career. First-year students Amy Shearer and Tim Reed aren’t wasting any time. This semester they created the Whitman Entrepreneurs group to begin building the skills and relationships needed to turn their ideas into reality. Unsurprisingly, both Shearer and Reed are entrepreneurially minded. During a gap year, Reed spent six months in South Africa attending the African Leadership Academy, a two-year school that enrolls African students from all over the continent with the hopes of teaching them entrepreneurship and leadership skills. At the Academy Reed started a photography business and felt invigorated by the entrepreneurial environment. “Entrepreneurial people are amazing people to be around; they are a different breed to some extent. They are willing to take risks and go for it, which I personally really like,” said Reed. Shearer’s entrepreneurial visions are quite different in nature. Ever since childhood, she has loved designing greeting cards. She hopes to turn this passion into a business by starting her own greeting card line. Shearer and Reed were inspired to start the Whitman Entrepreneurship group after realizing how many other Whitman students were similarly interested in developing their entrepreneurial skills. “Whitties are ideal entrepreneurs. They have such a broad range of skills in so many different areas, and they are really passionate about the things that they do,” Reed said. “So, it really just becomes a matter of really getting that going in a cohe-

First-years Draco Liu and Sarah Cronk listen to Director of Academic Resources Juli Dunn discuss entrepreneurship. Photo by Farrell

sive and conductive manner.” Noah Leavitt, assistant dean for student engagement and faculty adviser for Whitman Entrepreneurs, insists that no matter what any student wants to do when they get out of college, they have to be thinking like entrepreneurs. “There are going to be fewer and fewer positions out there that are established and set up that you can find and get yourself into,” Leavitt said. “It is going to be more and more the case that [jobs] are going to need to be developed, created, innovated and built.” Leavitt stresses that Whitman, despite not offering a formal business or accounting major, prepares students for entrepreneurship through its liberal arts education, encouraging students to approach problems analytically and creatively. The Student Engagement Center, along with the college, seeks ways to further support students interested in entrepreneurship. “Whatever Amy and Tim ask of us we’ll probably try to help make happen,” said Leavitt. “There isn’t a lot of focused attention [on entrepre-

neurship], and I think this student group will help change that.” While Shearer and Reed have many ideas for future plans for the group, their primary goal is to support group members’ entrepreneurial ambitions and interests. “The cool thing about this group is that we really want to cater it to the students’ interests that are involved. So the students are really helping us form the direction of the group,” said Shearer. One of the group members, sophomore Kristen Whittington, is toying with the idea of starting a bakery or leading workshops centered around healthy cooking. Whittington joined the group in order to learn more about entrepreneurship and make connections with local, successful entrepreneurs. “A lot of the networking is a big thing for me,” Whittington said. Whittington also looks forward to talking to people who have started their own businesses and succeeded. “They are kind of like little cheerleaders,” said Whittington. With the help of the Student Engagement Center, the

BodyKind promotes positive body image by ALLISON BOLGIANO Staff Reporter

U

nder the leadership of three female students and a counselor, a recently formed campus group aims to promote positive body-image and self-love through openness, support and education. Sophomores Katie Tertocha and Michaela Lambert, junior Heather Domonoske, and counselor Tracee Anderson formed BodyKind this semester to begin countering negative body image with positivity and support. Body image issues silently pervade the Whitman community, according to Anderson. BodyKind hopes to end the silence surrounding body image by encouraging open dialogue. “For the last 20 years I’ve worked at Whitman, issues around eating, body image and self-worth have always been a really important part of students’ lives and a really unsettling part of most students’ lives I’ve had contact with,” said Anderson. The idea for a body image group came from Anderson, fellow counselor Sharon Kaufman-Osborn and Associate Dean of Students Barbara Maxwell, who all had spoken with many students about body image and eating disorders. “We all got our heads together and decided, ‘let’s try to get something going’ and there was a lot of excitement and interest from the student body,” said Anderson. Early this semester Tertocha, Lambert and Domonoske developed the framework for BodyKind. The group will include three committees working toward its goals of openness, support and education.

ILLUSTRATION BY BAILEY

The three committees are passive programming, active programming and training. The passive programming will use t-shirts, posters and sticky notes to spread messages of self-love around campus. Active programming is expected to include documentaries, art exhibits or student panels and the education committee will conduct Green Dot type trainings to promote a continuing climate of positive body image. With this internal club orADVERTISEMENT

ganization, BodyKind hopes to bring attention to the impact of culture and language on how students feel about their bodies. “Our campus is so focused on being active and being healthy that we tend to integrate a lot of negative body talk that I think really brings down the positive body culture that we should be striving for,” said Lambert. Domonoske chose to get involved after realizing the importance of getting support for

body-image issues in high school. As a resident assistant in Jewett Hall, she became even more aware of the impact of self-image and eating on students’ lives. “Living in a freshman dorm, there is a lot of public eating, public bathrooms and public mirrors, so you hear a lot more comments than you would living with one sibling or two siblings,” said Domonoske. Domonoske, for example, frequently heard commentary about food choices. “I have a lot of friends that will make comments here that they eat healthier at Whitman than they do at home just because there’s the salad bar, and everyone else is eating salad. So there is this, ‘Oh I should eat salad, and I should eat healthy,’” said Domonoske. The group hopes to become a resource that supports students while creating a cultural shift that makes dialogue about body image issues safe and open. “We’re not going to stop people from dealing with the issues but hopefully just make them more comfortable in dealing with them,” said Tertocha. Currently, BodyKind is trying to get more students involved in the group and in the broader project of creating a culture of healthy body-image. “If someone feels like it’s important to care about themselves, then they should join the group,” said Tertocha.

ASWC MINUTES 3/4

group already has a list of local entrepreneurs who are excited to meet with the group. Last week the group met with Director of Academic Resources Juli Dunn, one of the owners of The Sweet Putt. Local entrepreneurs that the group might meet with in the future include the owners of Graze Restaurant, the Director of Walla Walla’s recently reopened Small Business Development Center and a Whitman alumna who started her own winery. Shearer and Reed say that the Whitman Entrepreneurship group is not just for students interested in starting a business. Students with any level of interest in entrepreneurship or who have a desire to turn something they are passionate about into a business or non-profit organization are encouraged to join the group. “Entrepreneurship is about being really passionate about something and pursuing that full-heartedly,” Shearer said. “Entrepreneurship can be so many different things.” Whitman Entrepreneurs meets every Friday at noon in the Jewett Hall Main Lounge.

Author of ‘Fast Food Nation’ to speak at graduation by PATRICIA VANDERBILT Editor-in-Chief

E

ric Schlosser, author of “Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the American Meal,” will deliver the commencement speech for the class of 2012. Schlosser is also the author of “Reefer Madness: Sex, Drugs and Cheap Labor in the American Black Market,” a 2003 book on the history and trade of marijuana, labor conditions of migrant workers and the pornography industry. Schlosser’s investigative journalism has appeared in many national publications including The Atlantic Monthly. He received a National Magazine Award in 1995 for his magazine article, “Reefer Madness,” and is currently working on a book, “Command and Control,” about the state of nuclear threats. “It’s an honor to be giving the Commencement speech at Whitman this year,” said Schlosser in a Whitman College press release. “During my previous visits to the campus, I found the students really impressive and their commitment to sustainability encouraging. I think Whitman is a real gem.”

CONFIRMATION OF KAITY CURRY AS KWCW DIRECTOR VOTE PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3 REQUEST OF $1610 FROM TRAVEL & STUDENT DEVELOPMENT FUND FOR SPRING BREAK CLIMBING TRIP IN RED ROCKS, NV BY CLIMBING CLUB REQUEST PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

REQUEST OF $850 FROM TRAVEL & STUDENT DEVELOPMENT FUND TO SCREEN THE SHORT FILM “BAD DOG” BY ZACHARY ELLENBOGEN AND WILL WITWER REQUEST PASSED: Y: 15 N:0 A: 4

REQUEST OF $920 FROM TRAVEL & STUDENT DEVELOPMENT FUND FOR NATIONAL COUNCIL ON EDUCATION FOR THE CERAMIC ARTS IN SEATTLE, WASH. BY MEGAN OOST AND WILL NEWMAN-WISE REQUEST PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

CONFIRMATION OF BO ERICKSON AND CHELSEA KERN AS BLUE MOON EDITORS VOTE PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

REQUEST OF $1584 FROM CONTINGENCY FUND FOR RADIO CONVERTER ($1,584) BY KWCW REQUEST PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

CONFIRMATION OF HANNE JENSEN AS QUARTERLIFE EDITOR VOTE PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

CAMPUS CLIMATE CHANGE RESOLUTION VOTE PASSED: Y: 16 N:0 A: 3

We

ADVERTISEMENT

opened a drive thru only sandwich shop on 9th Street in our catering building. We think you might like it. You should try it sometime. We serve breakfast paninis and lunch.

It’s like fast food without the crap in it.

a drive thru for food

Text your order to the drive thru 509-540-1261 Monday-Friday 7a-3:30p


A&E

Mar

08 2012

PAGE

4

‘Hello Failure’ presents graceful, life-affirming portrait of courage by ALEX HAGEN Staff Reporter

“H

ello Failure,” a comedy written and directed by Visiting Assistant Professor of Theatre Kristen Kosmas, was performed from Thurs., Mar. 1 through Sun., Mar. 4 at Harper Joy Theatre. The show, described as a “sprawling, associative, neo-realistic comedy of beauty,” centers on the story of seven submariners’ wives and the different ways in which they cope with the lack of their absent husbands. While failure and the fear of failing are themes that loom large in the play, it also features ideas of a more optimistic nature. “I think the play, in both form and content, is ultimately about generosity, kindness, forgiveness and optimism,” said Kosmas. “It is also about commonality, what we have in common with other people even when we might feel alone or impossibly unique.”

Kosmas also commented on her process in writing the play, which was first performed in New York in 2007. “What’s interesting about failure is the effort that precedes it, the repeated attempt to do something and have it work out,” she said. “I discovered there are all these little acts of heroism, or attempts at heroism, taking place every day, in normal life, and that discovery moved me.” The play presented a challenge for the actors due to its emphasis on language rather than story. “The shape of words and the flow of the dialogue take precedent over an actor’s internal work,” said sophomore Sam Halgren. “When this idea of working with language clicked, I felt wonderful.” “We paid such careful attention to the script—punctuation, line breaks, particular wording—that it felt like an English class sometimes, which I loved,” said junior Henry Nolan. The experience of perform-

ing in the show proved rewarding. “At the end of this show, after having experienced everything along with all the other characters, I always feel uplifted, like everything will be okay,” said senior Caitlin Goldie. Audiences responded positively to the play, expressing their appreciation of its compelling and complex themes. “As I watched the play, I kept thinking how confused I would be if I just read the script, but I felt like watching the performance allowed me to experience a lot of what was going on, even if I didn’t consciously understand it,” said firstyear Mary Christensen. “I almost wish I could watch it a second time!” “The simplicity was very appealing and allowed the audience to focus on the actors and what they were saying,” said first-year Sabra Jaffe. Overall, “Hello Failure” proved to be a thought-provoking and satisfying experience for cast, crew and audiences alike.

The cast of “Hello Failure” (above) brings Visiting Assistant Professor of Theatre Kristen Kosmas’ play to life on the Alexander Stage of Harper Joy Theatre. The play explored themes of kindness and commonality in the face of failure. Photos by Felt

Tattoos colorful topic on campus

PIO PICKS Each Thursday, The Pioneer highlights several events happening on campus or in Walla Walla during the weekend. Here are this week’s picks:

Sophomores Bridget Tescher (left) and Taia Handlin (right) display their body art. The students discussed the personal reasons behind their choices to get tattoos. Photo by Felt

by CLARA BARTLETT Staff Reporter

W

alking through the campus of a liberal arts college, especially colleges located in the Pacific Northwest, you wouldn’t be surprised to see a few tattoos, nose piercings or alternative hair colors and styles. While unusual personal expression and body modifications may seem normalized in a college setting, it’s easy to forget that tattoos were once taboo in mainstream society, confined to fringe elements like sailors and street gangs. Nowadays, teen idols casually flaunt their latest ink in exotic languages, and everyone from Angelina Jolie to the British Prime Minister’s wife, Samantha Cameron, has been known to go under the needle. Is the tattoo truly a thing of the past? The Pioneer investigated Whitties’ true feelings on tattoo culture.

Sophomore Taia Handlin explained her motivations in getting her tattoo—a tree with roots placed between her shoulder blades. “I’ve always liked body art; I’ve always sort of imagined getting a tattoo, and I sort of like the way tattoos look on people’s bodies, especially in movement. And well, this is a more cliché answer, but I get really bored with my appearance,” said Handlin. Sophomore Bridget Tescher also chose to get a tattoo of a rooster and an agate geode between her shoulder blades. “I am really into art and artistic expression, and so for me, a tattoo is just another medium to work with,” said Tescher. “I like that clichéd line, ‘Your body is a temple,’ because if my body is a temple, why not decorate it?” The question remains— are tattoos really a shocking statement anymore? “I’m from Portland, so I feel like

faux-hawks and tattoos are a dime-adozen,” said Handlin. “I don’t really get that much negative judgment. I mean, people react definitely—I feel like with any extreme body alteration people definitely want to know why.” One cause of divergent opinions on tattoos may be generational. In an online survey, 19 percent of Whitties responded that they had or intended to imminently acquire a tattoo, but 66 percent thought that having a visible tattoo would be a problem for their future career plans, with multiple respondents adding that they would conceal a tattoo in an interview with a potential employer. Faviola Alejandre, a first-year student considering a tattoo, expressed her worries in this area. “For me, one of the fears is that it gives the wrong image in job interviews. Like, I would never get anything too extreme. But one of the things I do like about tattoos is that it’s

a form of expression,” said Alejandre. “I definitely think it’s more common for people to get tattoos now as opposed to our parent or grandparents’ generation,” said Tescher. However, generational divides are not universal. “My grandmother saw [my tattoo] on Facebook, and her reaction was, ‘That’s really cute!’” said Handlin. In discussing tattoos, students’ opinions ranged widely, based on the type of tattoo, its location and its message, which lasts for life, barring laser removal. “[It] can’t have cursive, script, any of that stuff. No stars, no hearts, no names, no faces, nothing in the middle chunk of your body and I don’t like wrist tattoos,” said first-year Perry Anderson. “If one of my friends was like, ‘Hey, I’m thinking about getting my grandpa’s name in script on my boob,’ I’d say ‘No, don’t do it.’”

ILLUSTRATION BY HWANG

by NATHAN FISHER Staff Reporter

F

riday night I felt the call of Uncle Sam and saw “Act of Valor.” Even though the movie had ONLY one thing going for it—the action. Man, was the execution flawless. The plot, or rather lack of plot, really does not matter in this movie . . . at all. As we have seen this year, the Navy SEAL team is the go-team gang to save the world. “Act of Valor” aspires to mix fact with fiction as real active-duty SEALs try to act

and, unfortunately, the actors speak. The acting is just plain terrible and this fact is painfully obvious from the get-go. When these testosterone-loaded macho studs try to emote as the plot briefly throws families and relationships into the mix, the movie dies. In the end, the lack of acting and the abysmal plot line doom “Act of Valor.” However, in all fairness, you don’t go to a movie titled “Act of Valor” expecting to see complex relationships and tight dialogue; you go to see things blow up and true American heroes defend the US of A! I enjoyed watching the film—if only I had another 50 pounds of muscle, I too could join the SEAL team and be one of the manly men in the movie. Not going to happen, so I’ll be content with watching these men shoot first, ask questions later and defend our home. Hoorah!

‘Some Nights’ brimming with anthemic Fun. by MALLORY MARTIN Staff Reporter

F

un. is the name of the band, and their latest album Some Nights is just that. After the breakup of his band The Format, lead singer Nate Ruess went on to create Fun. in 2008. Tues., Feb. 21 marked the release of their second LP, which was unfortunately leaked in advance. Despite this, the album has done considerably well, with its anthemic single “We Are Young” featured on Glee and hitting number one on the iTunes song charts. Ruess leads the band on vocals with ex-member of Steel Train, Jack Antonoff on guitar and trumpet. The trio is rounded out with musical renaissance man and Anathallo veter-

KWCW SHOW OF THE WEEK

GRAPHIC BY ALDEN

an, Andrew Dost on vocals, piano, guitar, bass, keyboards, synthesizers, trumpet, drums, percussion and even the flugelhorn and glockenspiel. Fun.’s strongest trait is its ability to lyrically explore sad or dark topics and pair them with upbeat and even joyful music. It’s an odd combination—the mix of instruments, voice alterations, lyrics, melodies and background noises in this album are entirely unpredictable and unexpected—but it all feels right. Perhaps the best, certainly most well-known songs on the album are title track, “Some Nights” and hit single, “We Are Young.” These feature a sort of pride in youthful stupidity and craziness with which most college students will connect. Flip on these songs

‘DJ Chandon’ Chandini Gaur brings you the newest hits in up-and-coming hip-hop and R&B. With occasional guest cohosts, DJ Chandon is part talk show, part musical exploration. Start your weekend right and tune in! Fridays, 5 p.m. - 6 p.m. On the dial at 90.5 FM Walla Walla and streaming live at www.kwcw.net. For requests, call (509) 527-5283.

when you just feel like dancing. The undervalued gem of the album would have to be “Out on the Town,” a bonus track. The lyrics are great, if a little dark, and the words are fun to sing along with. It’s also super catchy, so be prepared to have it stuck in your head. The band does a good job of giving their album some variation by throwing in more than just the anthemic rock songs they do best. Songs like “Carry on” and “Why Am I The One” offer a soft and balladic approach that give the emotions of Some Nights a little rounding out. Not all the songs are perfect. Some are pretty cut-and-paste and a little repetitive, like “All Alright” or “It Gets Better.” Other numbers give the impression that the band may have had a little too much fun (pun intended) with the recording equipment. “Stars,” for example, starts out as a sweet, playful piece, but ends as a weird super-synthesized mess. This is not the norm, however. The rockers generally manage to tastefully play around with auto-tuned sounds without descending into Owl City territory. Even the worst songs on this album will have you tapping your toes and smiling through your sadness.

Thursday, Mar. 8, 7 p.m. Olin 130.

Fridays at Four Whitman College Fridays at Four Recital Series presents jazz pianist senior Billy Harbour, first-years Dylan Martin and Jason Morrison, Assistant Professor of Music Doug Scarborough and local musician Gary Hemenway.

Friday, Mar. 9, 4 p.m. - 5 p.m. Chism Recital Hall.

Seattle Concert Calendar Headed to Seattle for break? Catch some live music! A couple concert recommendations: The Pretty Reckless (grunge pop) Saturday, Mar. 17, 8 p.m. El Corazon. 109 Eastlake Ave. E., Seattle.

Navy SEALs valiantly struggle to act out a fictional plot. In short, a CIA operative gets kidnapped, and the rescue team uncovers a plot to try to smuggle terrorists into the United States to set off suicide bombs in major cities. The only people who can save the day are, you guessed it, the United States Navy SEALs. This big budget recruitment movie roams the globe as the SEAL team jumps out of planes, swims onto moving submarines, shoots big guns to its heart’s content and kills the bad guys. The movie attempts to mesh the real-life, active-duty NAVY SEALs and their amazing combat tactics with a big-budget Hollywood movie. The action could not be better—bullets flying all over the place, and a well-aimed rocket launcher never fails to blow a truck sky-high. All-in-all, the action and military technology are AWESOME! But this is not “The Artist,”

Perspectives on Landscapes and Agriculture Campus Sustainability presents the latest in the cross-disciplinary “Perspectives on Landscapes and Agriculture” lecture series. Associate Professor of Anthropology Jason Pribilsky discusses “Landscapes of Remittances in the Ecuadorian Andes,” followed by a presentation from Assistant Professor of Geology Nicholas Bader, “The Agroecosystem: Landscape as Machine.”

Kaiser Chiefs (indie rock)

Friday, Mar. 23, 7 p.m. Showbox at the Market. 1426 1st Ave., Seattle.

STYLE SPOTLIGHT Every week, The Pioneer searches out Whitties who bring an extra splash of fashion consciousness and sartorial daring to campus. This week’s Style Spotlight: junior biology major Tom Vogt. Style Soundbites “I have a lot of different interests,— bike racing, being outdoors—and I don’t have a lot of money on the side for investing in fashion, so I tend to trawl a lot of vintage stores at home in Portland. So many of my most interesting pieces tend to have once been someone else’s. The jacket, I know that it’s Italian, but otherwise I’m not really sure. I feel like as tweed jackets go, this one is unique because it has these nice suede elbow patches. It’s really comfortable; it’s a great piece for fall and spring especially. The vest is another vintage store find in Portland. I think that vests are kind of an underused piece of menswear, because they can be very slimming and they really accentuate an athletic build, which is something that a lot of Whitman guys have, because we tend to be a pretty active campus.” “The tie was a gift from my brother; he’s a graphic designer, and so when he gives Christmas gifts, he usually likes to design packaging for them, as though they’re from some fictional company. I think that the skin-

Tom Vogt ‘13 (above) shares the stories behind his vintage clothing items and his tips on beard fashion. Photo by Beck

ny tie can sometimes scream ‘hipster,’ which isn’t always the look I’m going for, but I think the combination of the skinny tie with the more rustic tweed jacket is a nice look.” “The shoes are local; I bought these a few weeks ago from Door Number Two, the vintage store next to the Colville Street Patisserie downtown. I was really attracted to this kind of rich terra cotta color that they have . . . loafers are super convenient, you don’t have to tie anything up in the morning. I think that the combination of the reds in the leather work as well with a pair of blue jeans as they would with a grey or a blue suit. I love this belt—this is probably circa 1940s L.L. Bean. The bag is from a Seattle company called Filson; they’ve been making outdoor and workwear since the 1890s—always made in Seattle—which I really appreciate. It’s interesting that brands like Filson or Pendleton are undergoing kind of a renaissance in menswear—things that are seen to have heritage to them, or authenticity, are very popular right now.” “I think if there’s one key to pulling off a beard, it’s that you have to avoid looking like you’ve just forgotten to shave. The key to that is what most people call manscaping, or grooming. I think if you keep your beard trimmed to an even length and maybe trim some stray hairs, it lets people know you’re doing the beard intentionally and you’re not just getting lax in your personal grooming. But I find [beards] to be way more convenient . . . it’s like having a blanket on your face.”


SPORTS

Mar

08 2012

PAGE

5

Men’s baseball fights long losing record by SYLVIE LUITEN Staff Reporter

D

espite a challenging game schedule, with games against some of the toughest competition in the nation, the Whitman baseball team is working hard to break out of a deep rut of consecutive losses. Coming off a 2011 season with a final NWC record of 4-16, the team has already been showing some grit against tough opponents this spring. Their NWC record is currently 2-1 after a couple of wins against the University of Puget Sound last weekend; their overall record is 2-13. “It seems like we’re having another typical Whitman year, but it’s anything but. Last year, we were playing the same teams and not even competing. This year we just ended a four-game series with one of the best teams in the nation, and, to be honest, should have won at least two of the games,” said junior Chris Andrews, who transferred to Whitman in order to play baseball after a year at Santa Clara University. After seeing such progress already this year, the

Eli Mathieu ‘15 [left] and Jimmy Madden ‘14 [right] congratulate Kyle Moyes ‘14 [center] for scoring two home runs during a doubleheader against the Puget Sound Loggers last Saturday, March 3. The teams came away with one win each. Photo by McCormick

team remains highly optimistic. “We’ve got them right where we want them, we’ve finally solidified a lineup, and people are starting to figure out their roles,” said sophomore infielder and captain Cam Young. Though in his third year coaching at Whitman, this is the first that coach Jared Holowaty has had a full team of his own recruited players. “We’re all rising players. We’re so young; everyone’s up and coming,” said Coach Holowaty. The team is motivated to change the trend that Whitman baseball has fallen into. “As a young team we’re definitely trying to shatter the preconceived notions that everyone has about Whitman baseball. When archives assistants write that we shouldn’t get funding I think that fuels us,” said sophomore pitcher Tristan Gavin. The team has set high goals for themselves, and sees them as realistic. “We’ve got the guys— we’re a scrappy bunch—but we definitely have the ability to win. It’s all a matter of execution,” said Andrews.

Women’s golf takes decisive first swings in spring season by PETER CLARK Staff Reporter

A Whitman cyclists line up for a quick photo before heading out for a ride. The team hopes to draw in new talent to maintain the success of the club. Photo by McCormick

Whitman cyclists seek new riders hitman’s cycling team returns this year through the hills of Walla Walla. Although the team competes and trains throughout the year, their true season begins this spring break. Traditionally one of Whitman’s best performing teams nationally, the cycling team is currently focused on rebuilding as it copes with the loss of several excellent riders over the past two years. However, if there is one thing that is constant, it is the Whittie cyclists’ commitment to fun and excellence. The team is working to get back to the national championship caliber that made them the 2010 Team Overall National Champions. For the men and women, the goal is clear. “My main aim is to get more riders on the team,” said team president David Hancock. Unfortunately for the women, finding first-years to build around has been difficult. “There are no new freshmen girls, which is a bummer. Whitman has always been known for our strong women’s team so that [lack of freshmen] is disappointing,” said team vice president Molly Blust. It appears the reason for the lack of new riders may be a simple ironic by-product of the team’s success. “I have noticed that there is a really big intimidation wall between the racing team and people who just want to come on rides” said Hancock. The team, however, is extremely welcoming and focused on fun. “The greatest part about the

cycling team is you don’t have to be amazing to have fun. It’s more about the community,” said sophomore cyclist Cameron Penner-Ash. The training serves as a time for athletes to improve their riding, but is also an important tool for bringing in and training new members. “A lot of us had never raced before the team. I got my bike, and I didn’t really know what to do, but I went on a ride and really liked it. All of the upperclassmen are really nice and really good teachers,” said Blust. “As far as training schedule, it’s very informal. Since cycling is an endurance sport, you want it to peak at conference or nationals,” said Hancock. Much like in swimming, the team must plan its day-to-day practice while keeping an eye on the bigger picture. There is one scheduled ride a week on Fridays, but after that, it is up to the riders to build their own training schedule. As Hancock explains, this open schedule is an integral part of the team. “One of the realities is that everyone is on their own training schedule. So the open schedule serves a dual purpose: it allows people to be intense and train hard while also encouraging less serious riders to come out.” The cycling team will be spinning their wheels this weekend at a race in Corvallis, Ore. On the weekend of Mar. 31, the team will host The Whitman Omnium, broken into three stages: a Saturday morning road race, an afternoon team time trial and a Sunday morning criterium.

SCOREBOARD

UPCOMING

GOLF

GOLF

by MATT TESMOND Staff Reporter

W

Men’s Whitman Three-Way 2nd March 3 Women’s Whitman Three-Way 1st March 3

TENNIS

Women’s Vs. Pacific W; 9-0 March 2

BASEBALL

Men’s vs. Puget Sound W; 7-1 March 3 Vs. Puget Sound L; 8-6 March 3

Women’s PLU Invitational March 10, 11 AWAY

TENNIS

Men’s v. Spokane Falls CC March 7, 4:30 p.m. AWAY v. George Fox March 10 AWAY v. Pacific March 10 AWAY v. Linfield March 11 AWAY v. Lewis & Clark March 11 AWAY Women’s v. Lewis & Clark March 9, 4 p.m. HOME v. George Fox March 10, 11 a.m. HOME

BASEBALL

v. Pacific Lutheran March 11 AWAY

fter bursting onto the Northwest Conference golf scene last spring, the Whitman Women’s Golf Team is looking to improve on a successful start to the season. Following a secondplace finish in the NWC last year, the Missionaries have continued their exceptional play by capturing second place in the Fall Classic earlier this year. According to Coach Skip Molitor, the success in the fall should pay dividends as the season goes on. “Success breeds success. It’s nice to have performances which you can look back on and gain confidence from,” said Molitor. This past weekend, the team earned another confidence boost when they traveled to Wildhorse Country Club and battled through

adverse weather conditions to earn a victory over NAIA powers; College of Idaho and Lewis and Clark State. In addition, the team is coming into the spring with months of training already boosting them ahead of the field. While some teams went into hibernation over the winter, the Missionaries took to the gym and participated in player-led workouts. Sophomore phenom Katie Zajicek, ranked tenth nationally in DIII golf, says the benefits of the workouts go past just getting into shape. “Team workouts got us together and reminded us that we are a part of a team,” said Zajicek. With individual sports like golf, it becomes easy for players to only focus on their individual score and forget about the team. Team workouts reinforce the emphasis on group success, and remind players that their in-

dividual scores accumulate to a more important group score. Junior golfer Tate Head was a part of the growing pains the program went through in its earlier years, and couldn’t be happier with the current team camaraderie their group is thriving on. “It’s been a lot of fun watching the team grow. My freshman year, we didn’t even have enough players to field a full team,” said Head. Nowadays, the Lady Missionaries have their eyes on the Conference crown. With a team comprised of mostly underclassmen accompanied by two stellar juniors, the sky is the limit for this young team. Look for the Missionaries to continue their rise as they travel to Lakewood, March 1011 for the PLU Invitational, and then Southern California, March 22-23 for the Spring Fling Invitational hosted by Augustana.

WHITMAN FEBRUARY SPORTS HIGHLIGHTS February NWC Athletes of the Week: Alyssa Roberg ’13 of women’s tennis; Courtney Lawless ’15 of women’s tennis (recognized twice); Peter Valentine ’15 of baseball; Conor Holton-Burke ’12 of men’s tennis; Andrew LaCava ’14 of men’s tennis; David Michaels ’12 of men’s basketball (his fourth this year). Highlights: Men’s tennis is currently eighth in NCAA Division III national rankings. David Michaels ’12 was named the NWC Men’s Basketball Player of the Year. Jenele Peterson ’12 of women’s basketball was named to the NWC First Team.

Club sports: Spring home games ULTIMATE FRISBEE Men’s and Women’s v. Onionfest March 31, April 1 v. Men’s DI Big Sky Conference Championships April 21, April 22

RUGBY

Men’s v. North Idaho College April 14 v. Alumni April 28 Women’s v. Spokane Marmots April 14 v. Eastern Washington U April 21

LACROSSE

Men’s v. College of Idaho March 10 v. University of Puget Sound March 25 v. Pacific Lutheran University April 14 Women’s v. University of Washington March 31

CYCLING

Men’s and Women’s Whitman Omnium March 31-April 1 Tour of Walla Walla April 21-22

Survey: Whitties’ favorite spring sports by SARAH DEBS Staff Reporter

Spring is in the air and Whitman students are eager to break out their sporting gear, gather friends and head to the playing fields. The Pioneer surveyed Whitties about their favorite springtime activities. Here are a few of the most popular activities and how students can get involved on campus: Rugby Nationally, there are 854 college clubs, 343 female and 511 male, registered with USA Rugby. Whitman has both female and male club teams. Whitman men’s rugby team, the Reapers, is one of the best among the small liberal arts colleges in the Pacific Northwest. Practices are held Monday and Wednesday 4:005:30 p.m. on Harper Joy Field. The team encourages everyone, regardless of experience, to come play. The women’s team, the Motherruckers, plays against Pacific Northwest college teams and women’s clubs. The team practices year -round and is always looking for new players to join the rough and tumble. Interested players should join the team on Harper Joy Field for a fun practice Tuesday and Friday from 4:00-5:30 p.m. on Harper Joy Field.

GRAPHIC BY OLMSTED

Ultimate Whitman’s Ultimate Frisbee team plays in USA Ultimate sanctioned tournaments, and both the men and women competed in the 2011 Division I Pacific Northwest Conference Championship. Both teams are very competitive; the Sweets men are the highest ranked team from an NCAA Division III. Practices are held Monday and Wednesday at 4:20 p.m. and Sat. at

10:00 a.m. on the softball field. Lacrosse Men’s lacrosse is part of the Pacific Northwest section of Men’s Collegiate Lacrosse Association, which is a national organization of non-varsity college lacrosse programs. Currently, there are 213 collegiate men’s teams nationally who play through this organization. Practices are held five days a week on Ankeny Field from 4:00-6:00 p.m. As part of the Northwest Women’s Lacrosse League, women’s lacrosse competes against 15 other private colleges and public universities all over the Pacific Northwest. Last season, they placed third in league. Since they are already mid-season, interested new players can look forward to informal scrimmages in the fall. Practices are held five days a week on Ankeny Field from 4:00-6:00 p.m.


Mar

08 2012

FEATURE

PAGE

6

Recognizing Reusers

RESOURCEFUL WHITTIES MESH CREATIVITY, GREEN ETHICS

Physics-astronomy major Alexe Helmke ’12 reappropriates used wine bottles to create candle holders in a creative effort to reuse, recycle materials instead of simply throwing them away. Photos by beck

Shared approach to reuse unites Outhouse by MOLLY EMMETT Staff Reporter

T

he culture of Whitman College has a reputation for environmental awareness and being “eco-friendly.” While this may not apply to the entire student body, there are certain individuals who are dedicated to reducing, reusing and recycling. The residents of the Environmental Studies Interest House (referred to as “The Outhouse”) are passionate about reusing within their house and extend this commitment to the campus at large. All nine of the Outhouse residents engage in reuse projects together, and many of these opportunities appear while the house does their weekly campus recycling rounds. For example,

they often find posters or calendars that they use to decorate their walls, and even tissue paper that some, like sophomore Jenny Gonyer, use to wrap presents. “Doing recycling gives us the opportunity to reuse before we recycle,” said sophomore Andrew Patel. Besides the reusable items the residents find in recycling, they have also found ways of reusing their own household materials. Sophomore Jenni Doering’s family reuses plastic storage bags, so when the house began receiving several of these bags at each house dinner, Doering took it upon herself to wash them out and make them available for the residents to reuse. The environmentalists at the Outhouse have even found ways to reuse perishable

items like tea bags. Several of the residents use a bag two or three times before throwing it away, which conserves money and resources. As an added bonus, it even enhances flavor. “People don’t realize that some teas, especially white and oolong, actually get more flavor after the third use,” said sophomore Cathryn Klusmeier. To extend reuse beyond smaller items, sophomore Molly Simonson started a campuswide “freebox” that sits on the Outhouse porch. Borrowing the idea from the successful box in her Colorado hometown, Simonson set out the cardboard box so that students can pass along possessions they no longer want, such as clothes, books and appliances, to other students who can continue to

Students at Whitman pursue creative reuse projects around campus, find inspiration in artistic sensibility, R environmental awareness

use them. She instituted the project at Whitman because she believes the campus is generally in favor of things that increase environmental responsibility, but people often need to be given the opportunity to act.

“Being around people who have similar ideals or goals as you do is always really helpful” Ali Murray ’14

“It’s easy to get environmental zealots on board . . . but we’re putting these things in place so that the people who normally wouldn’t engage in this kind of reuse can and do,” said Simonson.

MEGAN OOST SEES ARTISTIC POTENTIAL IN FOUND OBJECT SCULPTURE

KAITLIN CLOUD SUCCESSFULLY AVOIDS CONSUMERISM IN NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION

by TALIA RUDEE

by TALIA RUDEE

Staff Reporter

eusing at Whitman is not purely based on the “green” ethics that seems to circulate around the student body. Megan Oost, a senior art major, uses found objects to create her sculpture masterpieces. “I looked at an old reclining lawn chair’s seat that mimicked the gestures I was using in clay,” said Oost, describing her first realization that found objects may fit into her artwork well. For Oost, used objects are a unique and influential source of inspiration for her work. The choice of reusing things was a way to enhance herself as an artist, but unexpected values came from this type of art as well. “It was mostly an aesthetic choice that I made this jump, but I like the ethics of it too,” said Oost. Oost finds much of her inspiration at Stubblefield, a salvage and recycling yard in Walla Walla. “It’s kind of depressing every time I go to Stubblefield and there is just so much stuff, and I just can’t bear to buy something new and use it,” said Oost. With a boost from her newfound environmental ethics, Oost still focuses on the aesthetic values she found originally in the liberating art of using found objects. This jump from using purely clay to reusing materials provides a more interesting artistic viewpoint and gives character to a piece. For instance, Oost visited a gallery in New York where an artist used a side panel of an RV that left the dirt on the side of the material. What some may call a flaw, Oost points out is “surprisingly meaningful.” “There’s a lot of untapped content there too, because [the objects] have their own kind of connotations and references that can be emotive in ways that things that you make yourself can’t.”

Another all-campus reuse initiative that the Outhouse is involved in is the Mug Share group. Patel is one of a number of Whitman students working to make reusable “for-here” mugs available at the Reid Espresso bar. This effort would hopefully reduce paper cup waste generated by those who get coffee and then stay at Reid to drink it. Evidenced by the plethora of projects happening at the Outhouse, it is a hub of reuse on campus. Many of the residents are partial environmental studies majors, and the shared mindset helps them to learn from one another and continue their efforts. “Being around people who have similar ideals or goals as you do is always really, really helpful,” said sophomore Resident Assistant Ali Murray.

ALEXE HELMKE REPURPOSES WINE BOTTLES IN HOME DECOR PROJECT by MOLLY EMMETT

Staff Reporter

A

t Whitman, there is a general “green” vibe from the student body, prompting many students to reuse and recycle due to personal ethical reasons. In February 2011, senior Kaitlin Cloud truly embodied the reusing culture with her decision to make a resolution to refrain from buying any new clothes for one year. “Buying new clothes was more about ego than anything else, and so recognizing that, I think, really helped me to put it aside and think that this was an adventure,” said Cloud. Cloud did admit that wearing old clothes for an entire year was difficult, especially when she was home in the big city of Seattle, as she was still “seduced” by the shopping and urban nature of the city. But remembering why she made the resolution and that it was a unique and challenging goal for herself helped her persevere and make it to the end. It is now a little over a year later, March 2012, and Cloud has completed her resolution and “adventure” successfully. “Even though I’m done, I’m still very committed to buying secondhand,” said Cloud. With her resolution originating as a goal to learn to be personally fulfilled without buying clothes, Cloud still kept her ethical goals in mind, which has influenced her life after the resolution. “Buying secondhand eliminates the resource pressures that I’m putting on the rest of the world, as far as transportation of goods and the ethics of where your clothes are made and supporting the giant textile industry.”

Staff Reporter

S

enior physics-astronomy major Alexe Helmke does not describe herself as crafty, but when it comes to reusing, she gets creative. Her favorite project for which she reuses materials is her wine bottle candle holders. “I’ve always thought that wine bottles look very elegant and beautiful on their own. I also am kind of a candle freak. So, at some point, I thought, ‘Why not put the two together?’” said Helmke. Using wine bottles that she cleans and saves and cheap taper candles that she purchases from stores like Wal-Mart, Helmke creates her inexpensive decorations. First, she must melt the bottom of the candle with a match so that it will form to the neck of the bottle. Then she places the candle in the top of the bottle and lights it. “After that, it’s pretty simple. You mostly just let the candle do its thing and melt,” Helmke said. As the candle melts, the wax drips down onto the bottle and creates a patterned result which she enjoys. Besides wine bottles, Helmke also uses colorful jars and other household containers from time to time. These work best for tea candles or votives, and add to her eclectic candle assortment. Regarding her reasons for reusing, Helmke does not necessarily credit the Whitman atmosphere, though she does recognize that many other students reuse materials. Rather, she is motivated by personal ethics. “I guess I try to reuse things just because it makes sense. Why buy something new when something you have will do the job, you know?” she said.


OPINION

Mar

PECULIAR PRIMARY

08 2012

PAGE

7

ILLUSTRATION BY CARTER-RODRIGUEZ

Pioneer columnists explore the perplexing nature of the 2012 Republican primaries, discussing everything from the candidates and their supporters to the process as a whole SAM CHAPMAN First-year

O

f all the detestable presidential candidates still in the race today, I reserve my worst ire for Ron Paul. True, some of the other candidates are far more despicable than he—notably Rick Santorum, who believes that women should stay in the home and not the workforce, and claims that the separation of church and state makes him want to “throw up”—but Paul still takes the cake. My special hatred for Paul does not come from any fear he might win the nomination: that honor will go to Mitt Romney. My hatred for Paul is not even entirely his fault, though I’m certain that his campaign is thrilled at the circumstances that are bringing it about. I abhor Ron Paul because so many people are wrong about him, although for the right reasons. I’m referring to the peculiar following that the Texas representative has among young liberals. The fact that certain Whitman students and hippies from my hometown of Austin alike have raised Paul up as a messiah has baffled me ever since he stepped onto the national stage. Near my home, a sign on a fence bears the words “Ron Paul Revolution” with the “evol” in “revolution” formed by the word “love” spelled backwards. Many of you may have seen these signs, and some of you may have wondered who insists on repainting the godfather of the Tea Party as some kind of underground rock ‘n’ roll freedom fighter.

I understand the appeal of Paul. His foreign policy represents peace at a time when we can’t seem to stop blundering into wars. He wants to legalize marijuana, an obvious choice when rationally considered. More broadly, however, he represents change: true freedom from the endless grind of choosing between a Democrat who will screw up and a Republican who will screw us over. This is false freedom. It’s true we need this change, but Ron Paul cannot and should not be a viable third option. He wants to abolish the Federal Reserve, handing control of the economy over to large private banks, which would then control credit, smaller banks and even printed currency according to their business needs. His much-vaunted foreign policy amounts to little more than total isolationism. He has stated that he believes global warming to be a hoax. Ron Paul is, in fact, the opposite of a liberal. It can be argued endlessly whether he is a conservative or a libertarian, but he is definitely far from a liberal. To be fair, I’ll let the man speak for himself: “The proper role for government . . . is to provide national defense, a court system for civil disputes, a criminal justice system for acts of force and fraud, and little else.”—Ron Paul, Feb. 5, 2007 (from his congressional website) People whose speeches skew eerily close to the admonitions of Adam Smith—that government is for nothing but roads, an army and lighthouses—tend not to be popular on college campuses. Paul, however, has subverted this by presenting himself as a rebellious option, a man outside the system. This is why I despise him more than the others: because he has perverted the noble concept of rebellion and revolution in order to trick the opposite constituency into viewing him through rose-colored glasses. Rick Santorum may be a misogynist , but at least people react to him as badly as he deserves.

Letter to the Editor As one who cares about punctuation, syntax, and clarity, I was disappointed to see The Pioneer alter my direct quote to remove a cherished comma. In the recent article on Ultimate frisbee, I had stated that Ultimate often has the fallacious perception of being “laid back, frivolous, or hippy-ish.” Yet in the printed article, the punctuation after the word frivolous—what is known as the serial, Harvard, or Oxford comma—was omitted. Though I understand that The Pioneer follows the journalism standards of the AP Stylebook I would like you to consider the benefits of the Oxford comma, namely its ability to reduce ambiguity, match the cadence of spoken word, and please your readers.

The Oxford comma provides imperative clarity in the viral online post, “We invited the strippers, JFK, and Stalin.” Without it, an unfortunate scenario becomes apparent: “We invited the strippers, JFK and Stalin.” Hence, I would like all readers to recognize that while The Pioneer may not be able to use the Oxford comma in their journalism, it is a linguistic tool that prevents misinterpretation, adds fluidity, and saves us from regrettable party decisions. (I have used the Oxford comma six times in this letter; it would be a disgrace to have it published without them. Your move, Pio.) Natalie Jamerson Class of 2013

Have an opinion to share? The Pio is soliciting guest columns! Send yours to editors@whitmanpioneer.com

First-year

A

bout a week ago, my dad sent me an article encouraging Democrats in Michigan (my home state) to vote for Rick Santorum in the Republican primary. Since Michigan has an “open primary,” anyone can vote in the primary, even those not registered as Republicans. My father, a lifelong Democrat, joked that I should take the call seriously and vote absentee for Rick Santorum. The goal behind this movement would be to 1) embarrass Mitt Romney with a defeat in his “home state” and 2) force Romney, current leader of the Republican contenders for president, to spend more money in other states because he would have to continue defending against Santorum, his only rival at this point in the election. Although I love a good joke, especially when it involves Republicans, the idea begged the question of what kind of attitude electoral politics should adopt at this day and age considering the increasingly cutthroat tone politics has been taking of late. This kind of voting is completely fair: Santorum even made announcements encouraging Democrats to vote for him, hailing the return of “Reagan Democrats,” who are frustrated with Obama’s policies but not with the Democratic party as a whole. In previous Republican primaries in Michigan, Democratic ballots have made up somewhere between six to 10 percent of the vote. On the one hand, it is always fun-

ny to see Republicans, the party with a little more money than Democrats, tear each other apart, and throw money around like drunk parents at a high school graduation party. On the other, is it a healthy political system in which we need to cast our votes insincerely, using them strategically rather than to voice true support for a candidate? A vote is the best path to citizen participation in a democracy. It’s the ultimate statement of authority, and everyone, thanks to Earl Warren, has an equal say regarding what happens in an election. To cast our votes insincerely, however, is to state that our democracy is not working correctly, requiring cheating to get the result we desire. This is not to say that open primaries are a bad idea. Many of my friends who are not registered Republicans posted proud statuses on Facebook about whom they voted for in the Republican primary. These friends were sincere in their votes, and the open primary worked in their favor. Since none of them are registered Republicans, none of them would have been able to express their voice had the primary not been open to all voters. Democracy is all about expressing your voice through your vote. Although it is a somewhat silly notion that our ultimate expression of freedom involves checking or punching a piece of paper, it is awesome that we have that ability. When people vote insincerely or for ulterior motives, it stains our whole democratic process as insincere. As much as I would love for Mitt Romney to outspend himself before he meets Obama in the field of battle, it isn’t necessary for Democrats to vote insincerely. Voting is the last form where the citizen has complete control, more than campaign contributions, more than the media and more than ad campaigns since Citizens United. If we don’t take it seriously, we risk losing the last wholesome part of democracy.

KONY 2012 preys on Whitman idealism by CHARLIE WEEMS Guest Columnist, Senior

N

onprofit Invisible Children kicked off its KONY 2012 campaign with an impressive social media blitz. Within a matter of hours the 30-minute video advocating the capture of Joseph Kony, Ugandan commander of the Lord’s Resistance Army, had reached nearly 4.5 million views. At Whitman, students formed a Facebook group entitled “KONY 2012 Whitman College” that had recruited 350 members by the end of the day. The group plans on hosting an event called “Cover the Night” on April 20 to build awareness about the atrocities Joseph Kony has committed. I admire the sentiments expressed by all of those who joined the KONY 2012 campaign with a willingness to help. But let me be perfectly clear: Supporting justice for Joseph Kony through Invisible Children, Inc. is a terrible way to ameliorate the situation in Uganda. Invisible Children itself was given two out of four stars for ac-

Voices from the Community DANIEL SWAIN

EMILY HANSCAM

Junior

Senior

“I wish the professors and students had higher expectations for the student body. I feel like there are a lot of opportunities on campus for collaboration with professors and other students that could be taken better advantage of.”

KYLE SEASLY

“The transitions with the dance department to create the dance major could be smoother . . . We need a tenured person for the department to have a major but it seems unrealistic that any one person could manage that.”

countability and transparency by the watchdog website Charity Navigator, spends only 31 percent of its budget on charity programs and pays its founders roughly $90,000 each per year. These salaries are not inclusive of travel, filmmaking and promotional costs that comprise the majority of Invisible Children’s annual budget. Invisible Children is not so much a charity as a media company that advocates for U.S. intervention in Uganda. That is the far deeper problem with the KONY 2012 campaign. Invisible Children is lobbying for direct military action to prosecute one individual. The United States African Command and the Ugandan military attempted this in 2008, ultimately failing to capture Kony, breaking off peace talks and causing a backlash resulting in the deaths of over 1,000 individuals. Invisible Children supports the Ugandan military, which has been accused by Human Rights Watch of committing wrongful murder, rape and invasion of other sovereign states. Finally, remember that Invisible Children advocates for the use

of military force against the child soldiers protecting Kony. If Invisible Children succeeds in lobbying Congress for increased military engagement to capture him, the resulting violence would be atrocious. Organizations like Invisible Children prey on the idealism of students throughout the country. Documentary tours, book deals and social media are part of an act to raise money on the college lecture and film circuit. Fourteen of my friends have shared links pointing to various KONY 2012 paraphernalia that will raise money for Invisible Children’s lobbying efforts. I understand the romantic appeal of crusading for social justice in faraway places, but I find the support of a manhunt in central Africa a completely unacceptable course of action. Joseph Kony has killed thousands of individuals over the past two decades. Malaria continues to kill 1.2 million individuals every year. I encourage Whitman students to look for sustainable development practices to advocate for rather than supporting violent military crusades.

What do you see as the most pressing problem facing Whitman? Poll by Bernstein

RICH JACKS Counselor

ROBBIE SEAGER Sophomore

“The most common problem that students bring to us in the counseling office is problems of relationships. It’s probably not unique to Whitman, but it is the biggest problem—followed by depression, anxiety, tension and pressure.”

“Tuition continues to increase annually while Whitman is spending millions of dollars renovating buildings, despite student debt and unemployment sustaining record highs.”


BACKPAGE

Mar

08 2012

PAGE

8

TRUE LIFE

I’M THE EASTER BUNNY Unlike Santa, the Easter Bunny’s off-season is not filled with feverish preparations for next year. He’s got to keep himself busy, staying in shape for all that hop-hop-hoppin’. The Pioneer did a little research, and this was his schedule last year:

MAY OCTOBER The cool-down month. Dressed up as Peter CotLots of Easy Mac and “30 tontail for Halloween: blue Rock.” t-shirt, no pants. JUNE NOVEMBER Signed up for a calligraphy Redecorated the warren— class at the community sort of a cubist-rococo feel. college. Never went on account of lack of opposable DECEMBER thumbs. Got a job as a mall Santa. Too awkward to bring up JULY at the Christmas party at Went to 4th of July party. the Clauses’ . . . Uncle Sam kept asking if he lays the eggs he delivJANUARY ers. Brings up bad child- Attempted to change name hood memories. to E. Sterbun Ni. Sounded classier. AUGUST Went horseback riding FEBRUARY with Sasquatch. Felt weird Started thinking about about it. getting back in shape . . . hired personal trainer. SEPTEMBER Pulled a muscle working MARCH out. Treadmill not made Got a haircut. It looked for bunny stride. awful. This would happen just before Easter.

ILLUSTRATION BY ZINSER

MITT ROMNEY’S 12TH COMMANDMENT “Thou shalt do anything to win, literally.” The race for the Republican nomination has become a shitshow. While it seems as though Mitt Romney, former Massachusetts Governor, has a solid lead because he has won most of the primaries, Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum are still fighting. One of Santorum’s campaign managers recently told reporters, “We are pretty

sure we’re not going to win, but it’s still fun to screw with Romney.” Sadly for Romney, he has not caught onto this. He just came out with a new campaign slogan, based off of Ronald Reagan’s 11th Commandment (which Romney has totally ignored), “Thou shalt not speak ill of any fellow Republican.” Romney’s 12th Command-

ment: “Thou shalt do anything to win, literally.” So far he has stuck to it pretty well. He’s related himself to the lower middle class by having friends who are NASCAR owners, shown that he’s not really a rich jerk by releasing one year of tax returns where he pays less taxes than those who make $50,000 a year and making a $10,000 bet

on TV, advocated for drug testing welfare recipients, backtracked on resurfaced views on national healthcare mandates, and by “not [being] concerned about the very poor [because] we have a safety net there.” He’s become such a relatable guy to the diverse population of the United States—how will he not win?

Cartoon by Emily Johnson

ANSWERS FROM LAST WEEK: “SPLIT LEVEL”, “DARK CIRCLES UNDER THE EYES” AND “I UNDERSTAND.”

Dear Whitman ResLife, You do not know me, and I doubt you ever will. I know you try to get to know every student at Whitman, but you will still never get to know me; because, I am not a student, much as I wish I was. Even though I can use a semicolon with precision and skill, I will never walk the fabled halls of Prentiss, Anderson or even the Pit, which sounds like a place in Hell. Even though my best friend in all the world, Sarah Thisisnotarealpersonwhogoesheredontbotherlookingheruponpeoplesearch, is a freshman this year at your most fine of institutions, I was not allowed to attend. It is not a matter of my intelligence or skill, but rather one of diversity. According to you, I am too diverse for Whitman, seeing as I am not human. I am a dog, Sarah’s dog, and some specist fascist in charge of these things won’t let me live with her. Whitman may hate dogs, and think them inferior, but for some reason they love fish. It doesn’t matter that a fish cannot love people or interact in any meaningful way with anything outside of its tank. In order to put an end to this gross injustice, I am appealing to the very top of the ladder. Let all animals, no matter how many legs they use for locomotion, live in the dorms. Turn away the cats if you must, I wouldn’t blame you. But let those who love Frisbee, cuddling and rectifying the fact that humans have too little moisture on their faces attend Whitman College. Thank you.

Sincerely, Scruffles “Fetchmaster” Jones

ADVERTISEMENT


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.