Whitman Pioneer - Fall 2010 Issue 3 by Whitman College Wire

IN THIS ISSUE

Sheehan Gallery

HIV Testing

Whitman Triathlon

An inside look at “Spectra, Stream, Strata”, the gallery’s first exhibit of the year. page 4

Welty Student Health Center will offer a new HIV and hepatitis testing program that provides quicker results. page 2

Students, faculty and community members prepare for the swim team’s annual fall event. page 7

WHITMAN COLLEGE Walla Walla, WA Volume CXXVII Issue 3 whitmanpioneer.com S , 

Eggers, Zeitouns discuss experiences, book by KARAH KEMMERLY Staff Reporter

Dave Eggers, Abdulrahman and Kathy Zeitoun and Jocelyn Hendrickson, assistant professor of religion, convened in front of a packed Cordiner Hall on Tuesday, Sept. 28, to discuss “Zeitoun,” the class of 2014 summer reading selection written by Eggers. Both Whitman College students and the Walla Walla community came together to hear about Eggers’s writing process and the Zeitouns’ experiences. Kate Kight, a student academic adviser in Lyman House, introduced Eggers and the Zeitouns with high praise. In her introduction, she spoke of their “intangible and indestructible family bond” and their story of “constant boundless hope.” She also spoke of the book’s many honors and awards, and claimed that it showed “the power of a simple canoe.” Eggers claimed that what initially struck him most about the Zeitouns’ story was the image of a solitary man paddling around a deserted New Orleans looking to help people in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Hendrickson followed up where the book left off, asking the Zeitouns about their kids and Kathy’s post-traumatic stress disorder. She also asked them ques-

AXTELL Dave Eggers, Kathy and Abdulrahman Zeitoun and professor Hendrickson laugh at a joke during their discussion of Eggers’ most recent book, “Zeitoun.” Tuesday night’s discussion included questions from Hendrickson and members of the audience.

tions about their faith and why Zeitoun continued to pray so diligently while imprisoned at Camp Greyhound. Abdulrahman described prayer as a direct connection to God. “When you connect with Him, you are

Fourth sorority closer to reality Gamma Phi Beta, Alpha Gamma Delta and Alpha Phi to visit campus as Panhellenic looks to relieve overcrowding by HADLEY JOLEY Staff Reporter

“It’s really difficult to coordinate events with 108 women,” said Heather Smith, president of the Whitman College Panhellenic Council. The ideal membership is 65, according to Associate Dean of Students Barbara Maxwell. To remedy this situation, the Panhellenic Council put together an extension committee to recruit a fourth sorority onto campus. The committee has narrowed the field down to three sororities: Gamma Phi Beta, Alpha Gamma Delta and Alpha Phi. Of the three, Alpha Phi has a history on campus, but not in the past few decades. In October, all three potential new sororities will come to campus and make a presentation; the final selection will be based on that campus visit. Gamma Phi Beta comes on Oct. 5, Alpha Gamma Delta on Oct. 7 and Alpha Phi on Oct. 14. All presentations will be held in Olin 130 at 4:00 p.m and are open to the Whitman community. However, the selection process is not a guaranteed success. At least one of the three sororities has to agree to come to campus; the Panhellenic Council has to like at least one enough to bring them here; and Whitman College has to approve the fourth sorority, which includes

having the faculty vote to recognize the new sorority. Lizzy Schiller, vice president of recruitment, hopes that those challenges can be overcome to create more manageable chapters. “Due to the fact that DG and Kappa are both above their chapters’ actual limits, providing a fourth could really be beneficial to bringing chapter numbers down to a more manageable number for all chapters, and possibly provide a more equal balance of girls within the four,” she said. The large sizes have been noticed by other people in the sororities as well. “The fourth sorority would bring the numbers down, so each year during recruitment instead of taking 28 or 30 new members we’d only take 20,” said sophomore Delta Gamma Tate Head. “So it’s not necessarily to make Whitman more of a Greek school, it’s just to make it so that the sororities that are here don’t have as many members.” Smith echoed that assessment, saying that the fourth sorority would lead to all sororities limiting their recruitment numbers to about 20 per year. According to Maxwell, recruitment remained fairly consistent this year. About 100 women signed up and slightly over 80 women pledged. Each sorority SORORITY, page 3

under His protection,” he said. Though these are undeniably powerful aspects of “Zeitoun” and the presentation, many Whitman students attended because they were most interested in simply seeing the Zeitouns in person.

Sophomore Ryann Savino, a transfer student who, like first-years and other transfer students read “Zeitoun,” enjoyed seeing the Zeitouns outside of their role as characters and instead as regular people. EGGERS, page 3

COMMENTARY

‘Zeitoun’ talk falls short

“Readers say this is the first Muslim American family they know,” author Dave Eggers revealed Tuesday, Sept. 28, during his lecture. As AbALLISON dulrahman and BOLGIANO Kathy Zeitoun Columnist laughed, joked and reflected during their conversation with Eggers and Assistant Professor of Religion Jocelyn Hendrickson, the Whitman College community certainly came closer to knowing the central subjects of this year’s summer reading, “Zeitoun.” While Whitman deserves praise for its book selection and for bringing to campus the nationally-acclaimed Eggers and those featured in his novel, the college has failed to take full advantage of all that this rich text offers. Tuesday’s conversation between the author, the Zeitouns and Professor Henrickson only exacerbated my feeling that Whitman has not provided sufficient opportunity to discuss “Zeitoun.” ZEITOUN, page 6

Club athletes seek more equality by TYLER HULBERT Staff Reporter

Every day, at least 200 Whitman College students take to the field, court, pool or slopes to train and compete in the sports that they love. Some choose to do so as part of a varsity program, while others select another route and join a club sport. According to Athletics Director Dean Snider, approximately 75 percent of the Whitman student body is involved in athletics in some form through varsity, club and intramural (IM) sports. While a significant portion of this group strictly participates in IM sports, there are still well over 400 athletes on varsity or club teams. Student athletes in both of these groups are expected to devote a large portion of their time to their sport. Between regular practices, morning practices, weight lifting and conditioning, varsity athletes can easily spend over 15 hours training for their sport, not including the travel time required to compete in conferences where almost all of the opponents are at least a four-hour drive away. Club athletes are also often expected to make a similar time commitment. David Schmitz, history professor and coach of the men’s lacrosse team, expects a high level of commitment from his players. “We run it like a varsity program,” Schmitz said. Junior Stephen Stradley, who plays on the ultimate Frisbee team, echoed this CLUB, page 7

ROSENBERG Club cyclist Chelsea Momany ‘11 expresses frustration over the privileged treatment varsity athletes, such as cross country runner Kristen Ballinger ‘11, receive.

Class of 2014 sees increase Barish to in international students lecture about relativity by JOE VOLPERT Staff Reporter

HONG

Campus art culture A&E writer Nate Lessler examines the history of and inspiration behind prominent campus sculptures. page 4

When Lyla Wadia came to Whitman College from India this year, she felt surrounded by a larger group of other international students. Her feeling was justified. The class of 2014 has an especially high number of international students in comparison to last year. These students are also from countries that were previously unrepresented at Whitman. This fall there are 16 international first-year students and two others who are doing exchange programs; this figure accounts for 4 percent of this year’s first-year class. Last year there were only eight international first-year students. “Last year’s class was quite small,” said Kris Barry, the international student and scholar adviser. The class of 2014 includes firstyears from Lesotho, Lithuania, Mentenegro and Venezuela--countries that Whitman has previously not rep-

resented. “The result this year is primarily because of improved yield on the students we admitted; more of the students enrolled than we had expected,” said Tony Cabasco, the dean of admissions and financial aid. Whitman’s number of international students, however, is comparable to other small colleges. “Our numbers are about the middle. Some liberal arts colleges have upwards to 10 to 15 percent of their students who are international students. Many others have none or 1 to 2 percent,” said Cabasco. Cabasco additionally noted that enlarging the number of international students demands new financial strategies. “Increasing the number of international student numbers would require additional scholarship funds,” said Cabasco. There are many challenging INTERNATIONAL , page 3

by KARAH KEMMERLY Staff Reporter

Dr. Barry Barish, a leading member in the field of physics, is coming to Whitman College on Thursday, Sept. 30 to give a lecture on general relativity. Members of the department of physics believe that the presentation, entitled “Einstein’s Legacy and Our Best Description of the Universe,” will benefit both science and non-science majors alike. Barish is the Linde Professor of Physics, emeritus at the California Institute of Technology. He is also director of the Global Design Effort for the International Linear Collider, a important project in the field of particle physics. The lecture will be the starting event at the 12th annual meeting of the American Physical Society, a group of over 150 students and faculty from research labs and colleges throughout the Northwestern United States and Canada. BARISH, page 2

NEWS

September 16, 2010S

Community service programs to restart next week by MOLLY JOHANSON Staff Reporter

Sophomore Kenna Little knew from the start that she wanted to get involved in community service on campus. “It helps break the Whitman bubble and realizes the needs of the community, which you don’t see a lot on campus,” said Little. “I started volunteering with Adopt-A-Grandparent and have slowly been joining more and more programs.” The programs offered are the Mentor Program, Adopt-A-Grandparent, the Story Time Project, Youth-Adventure-Program and two community service trips, one in August and one over spring break. Aside from the service trips, all programs are starting up for the year on Monday, Oct. 4. Though the total number of students volunteering in programs through the Student Engagement has yet to be determined, it is above last year’s 467 students, or 31 percent of the student body. Every one of the five programs has increased enrollment this year. It’s no surprise that students feel such ownership for what they do because, except for the Story Time Project, all of these programs were created by Whitman students. Not only were these programs started by students, but they’re also are run by students. Each program employs at least one student intern. A major part of the intern’s job for each program is matching volunteers with different community partners, kids and elders. Both the Mentor Program and the

Story Time Project consider similar variables: transportation, gender, age group preference, language preference and what time volunteers are available. For the Adopt-A-Grandparent program, other factors are considered such as whether or not the student volunteer would like a grandparent with mental or physical disabilities, or whether they would like an active or stationary grandparent. Enrollment is up slightly to about 75 volunteers. This year, the Story Time Project has 90 participants, up about 20 from last year. For senior Claire Oatey, Story Time Project intern, the project brings together many of her pas-

sions. As a sociology and education major, she is excited to help with a program that promotes literacy and reading comprehension. “It’s essential to life,” Oatey said. “Reading to kids is the highlight of my week!” For the project, a pair of volunteers reads at a library, elementary, middle, or pre-school in the area for a half hour per week. “I was always surprised at how focused the four to five

year-old kids were the whole time,” said sophomore Morgan Caverhill. The program also stresses that it is a group-oriented program, rather than simply a tutoring program. Though the volunteers read to groups of mixed gender, the program still seeks more male volunteers. According to the Center on Education Policy, boys scored lower than girls on reading test scores in every state. Oatey feels that this is a problem that often flies under the radar. “Having male readers gives boys good examples that other boys are excited about r e a d i n g ,” said Oatey. T h e M e n tor Program, too, had a problem with male enrollment. Last year the ratio of male to female volunteers was about one to four. This year it is more balanced, in part because of their work recruiting in fraternities. The total n u m ber of mentors jumped from 130

to 175 people, making it Whitman’s biggest volunteer program. This, in turn, made matching mentors with mentees time consuming. “We’re both math majors, so we like the process,” said senior Andrew Matschiner, one of the Mentor Program interns about him and his cointern senior Rachel Sicheneder. One of the most important functions of the Mentor Program is to be a consistent and reliable part of a young person’s life. “Mentoring is such an effective way to make a difference,” said Matschiner. “You get to be a stable and reliable presence that sometimes parents aren’t. It’s better than a food drive, it’s a regular investment.” For senior Matt Manley, intern and founder of the Adopt-A-Grandparent program, community outreach is essential. “[The program] facilitates relationships with elders that students frequently lack during their college years,” Manley said, “and introduces Whitties to some really great people in their community. I think the creation of the program is a great example of Whitman and the Community Service Office supporting new ideas and student interests with regards to volunteering.” The increased involvement shows how community service is an integral part of Whitman culture. “As a Whitman College student, I’ve had a lot of opportunities in my life,” said sophomore Robby Seager. “However, not everyone’s so fortunate, so it’s my duty to give back to all the communities that have helped me, and then some.”

SLOANE

Health Center to provide new BARISH: Physics students HIV, hepatitis testing program look forward to lecture by SHELLY LE Staff Reporter

Do you know your HIV and hepatitis status? If you’ve ever been sexually active, tried intravenous drugs or have other risk factors for exposure, you may want to consider getting screened for human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) and Hepatitis C. Currently, the Welty Health Center provides blood testing for students under a state grant; however, a new and less invasive test is being introduced. Starting on Wednesday, Oct. 6, saliva swab testing for HIV and Hepatitis C will be available to students every first Wednesday of the month. The health center will be partnering with Blue Mountain Heart to Heart, a nonprofit organization that provides support to persons living with HIV/AIDS, to provide these free HIV and hepatitis screening tests. These screenings will be available from 4 p.m. to 5 p.m. on a first-come first-serve basis; results are confidential. Because the new saliva swab test is faster than the blood test, results can now be provided on the same day of visit; previous tests took a couple of weeks. If the test returns positive for HIV or hepatitis, the student will be provided with counseling support and resources for treatment. Junior Sofia Infante, president of the Student Health Advisory Committee (SHAC), hopes the new method will encourage more students to get tested. “This is the first year we’ve done this, so I don’t know what the outcome will be, but Whitman students are pretty open,” she said. “[This is] less invasive, and takes only ten minutes.”

The service gives students the opportunity to ask questions to a provider that works primarily with patients with HIV and hepatitis. Infante hopes that by introducing this new way of screening for HIV and hepatitis at Whitman, it will become the norm on campus to be tested and to be aware of the risks of these diseases. Some Whitman students, however, have concerns that the new testing will not influence the number of students who come to get tested. First-year Zoë Erb said that because the new screening will only occur once a month, it may prove inconvenient for students. “If the time is inconvenient, they might not make the time,” she said. Erb feels that screening should occur at least once a week. “If you think you’ve contracted one of

these diseases, a month is way too long to get tested.” According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, half of all new HIV infections occur among people under the age of 25. A similar study shows that one in 500 college students is HIVpositive. Claudia Ness, director of the Welty Health Center, has concerns about the prevalence of HIV. “We are certainly not without the concern of HIV, in this day and age,” she said. Erb feels the same. “I think it’s of the utmost importance to get tested,” she said. “While everyone should take universal precautions when dealing with blood or bodily fluids, you could protect others and prevent the spread of other diseases.”

KLAG A sign outside the Welty Student Health Center advertises the more convenient HIV and hepatitis testing.

the Pioneer

 page 1 The conference itself is not an open event, but the lecture is open to the public. It will consist of both Barish’s presentation and an audience question and answer period. Dr. Mark Beck, professor of physics at Whitman, summarized the main focus of Barish’s presentation. “The lecture will help you learn a little about general relativity and how physicists understand the universe—its structure, space and time, and gravity on a fundamental level,” he said. Barish will also discuss some of the research on gravity he did as the director of the Laser Interferometer GravitationalWave Observatory (L.I.G.O.), a laboratory operated by the California Institute of Technology and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology that centers around gravitational wave research. Beck briefly explained that L.I.G.O. focuses on observing gravity waves. Though the existence of these waves is an important prediction within the field of general relativity, no one has actually seen them. He also feels that Whitman students have a specific reason to take interest in L.I.G.O.’s work. “This is particularly applicable to the Whitman community because the L.I.G.O. research is in Hanford. It’s only about an hour away,” he said. Several Whitman students are looking forward to the lecture. Junior Matthew Logan, a physics major and math minor, has an interest in the general field of physics and already has background knowledge on the subject. “Physics has always been an interest for me. It has everything I like about math. It’s doing math and drawing pictures,” he said.

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“And I’m currently doing research focusing on gravity. It’s part of one of the most interesting and least understood fields in physics.” Logan pointed out that understanding gravity is important in order to understand the universe. “We study four different fundamental forces in physics. Of these forces, gravity is most prominent in shaping the universe. The others act on a small scale, not a broad cosmological one.” Junior Alexe Helmke, a physics and astronomy major, is interested to hear Barish discuss Einstein’s influence. “This summer I worked at the Oregon Museum of Science and Industry. The featured exhibit was on Einstein, so I do have some background information,” she said. Both Logan and Helmke believe that all students will find something interesting about the lecture. He believes that the lecture will expand on topics that students may have heard about before but never fully comprehended. “Anyone interested in space, the stars or the universe would benefit from the lecture,” said Logan. “People have heard about bending space-time. It’s an intriguing concept. And it might sound ridiculous, but it’s happening. This lecture is about investigating phenomena like that.” Helmke agrees. “I’m really interested in general relativity,” she said. “It’s mind-bending in the best possible way. It makes you think in a different way than you’ve ever had to. And regardless of whether or not you’re interested in physics, it’s still worth going. This is about the world around you) and how the universe works. It’s interesting to know why all of this happens like it does. The lecture is beneficial for anyone.”

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The Whitman College Pioneer is a weekly student-run newspaper published under the auspices of the Associated Students of Whitman College. The purpose of The Pioneer is to provide pertinent, timely news and commentary for Whitman students, alumni, faculty, staff and parents, as well as the Walla Walla community. The Pioneer is dedicated to expanding open discussion on campus about the issues with which students are most concerned. We provide coverage of Whitman-related news as well as featured local and regional events, and strive to maintain a standard of utmost fairness, quality, and journalistic integrity while promoting freedom of the press. In addition, the Pioneer strives to be a learning tool for students who are interested in journalism. The Pioneer welcomes all feedback and publishes weekly Letters to the Editor in print and online.

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NEWS

0September 16, 2010

SORORITY: Challenges present in first-year recruiting ď?Śď?˛ď?Żď? page 1 was limited to giving out 28 bids. However, that still surpasses the ideal number of new recruits. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the rock and the hard place right now, because we really do try to give as many people as are interested in the Greek system an opportunity to be a part of one of the fraternities or sororities, which is why we have memberships over 100 in two of our sororities,â&#x20AC;? said Maxwell. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also a point when you reach a certain size and you begin to ask yourself â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Is this person getting the same quality of membership [as] if our group only had 65 or 70 people?â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? The three potential sororities were chosen by looking for groups with both a strong national presence and numerous local alumni in order to give the new sorority the greatest chance of success. Though the national sororities have different procedures in place to start a new sorority, they all have a few steps in common. The new sorority would recruit at a different time than the three established sororities for the first year, which would be in 2011 if the process is successful. However, members would not move into section until a year later. Alice section in Prentiss Hall, which used to house the Delta Delta Delta sorority, would become the new sorority section a year later. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great leadership opportunity for upperclassmen who wanted to get involved in the Greek system but just havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. I really think that a lot of girls will be interested,â&#x20AC;? said Smith. However, a new sorority somewhat

lacks what Head says brought her into the Greek system in the first placeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; a group of current members that she bonded with during recruitment, as well as the friendships she formed with the other women who rushed. Head, however, believes that this aspect can be overcome. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I know that a big part of the reason I chose DG was because of the people already a part of it, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also all the people youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re joining with too, so if there

Staff Reporter

When junior Robert Crenshaw found out he had been awarded the Presidentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Volunteer Service Award for his work in Atlanta this summer, he had a little freak out. Okay, maybe a big freak out. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I started screaming when I realized the gravity of getting something with President Obamaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s signature on it,â&#x20AC;? said Crenshaw in an e-mail. Crenshaw, who is currently studying abroad, volunteered for AmeriCorps for six weeks this summer working as a media studies counselor for at-risk youth. He signed up for the Gulf South Youth Action Corps, which functions as a servicelearning academic camp. This job allowed him a great deal of freedom in designing curricula for the kids. Lina Menard, assistant director of the student engagement center, does not know of any other Whitman students who have

Having a fourth sorority could actually encourage more women to go through recruitment,â&#x20AC;? said Schiller. Maxwell, who has assisted with bringing a new sorority to Washington State University, says that the success of the possible new sorority depends on support from the current Greek system. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When a new fraternity or sorority comes on campus, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s really a requirement for the Greek system to recruit on behalf of that organization,â&#x20AC;? she said.

Alpha Phi

Founded: 1872 First chapter: Syracuse University, Syracuse, N.Y. Campuses: 151 Members: 200,000

Mission Statement: Alpha Phi is a sisterhood of outstanding women supporting one another in lifelong achievement.

Alpha Gamma Delta

Founded: 1904 First chapter: Syracuse University Campuses: 184 Members: 155,000 Mission Statement: Alpha Gamma Delta is an international fraternity for women that exists to provide opportunities for personal development through the spirit of sisterhood. We support lifelong learning as a means to gain understanding and wisdom. We promote the value of fraternal membership and commitment to higher education. We help prepare members to contribute to the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work. We advocate lifetime involvement in Alpha Gamma Delta.

Gamma Phi Beta

Founded: 1874 Founding chapter: Syracuse University Chapters: 171 Members: At least 170,000 Mission Statement: To foster a nurturing environment that provides women the opportunity to achieve their potential through a lifelong commitment to intellectual growth, individual worth and service to humanity.

Student wins volunteering award by WILL WITWER

was a really good group of people who were thinking of joining that sorority, I think that would be great,â&#x20AC;? she said. Another possible problem with a new sorority, according to Schiller, is that it might upset the numerical balance between sororities. However, she does not believe this is likely. â&#x20AC;&#x153;With a fourth sorority at Whitman, this means less girls dispersed between the four sororities, but I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s anything to be too worried about.

won this award. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re very excited that Robert has won this prestigious award,â&#x20AC;? said Menard. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Like so many other Whitman students, he cares a lot for those around him and takes opportunities to mentor and be mentored.â&#x20AC;? Crenshaw sought out this combination of teaching and service mainly because he wants to one day be a teacher. He was impressed with the work the campers created, including a mural, podcasts and film projects. Crenshaw said he did not participate in the program with any kind of award in mind. Instead, the award was proof of the meaning of the camp experience in itself. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I guess the award symbolizes something precious and valuable to me more than anything else,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It symbolizes that being community-focused and wanting to build a better world one kind deed at a time still means something in this world, and that just makes me happy.â&#x20AC;?

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INTERNATIONAL: Administration offers more support to first-years ď?Śď?˛ď?Żď? page 1 aspects of coming to Whitman for international students, and Whitman attempts to smooth that process. â&#x20AC;&#x153;International students face many challenges from applying for a visa, travel arrangements, culture shock, adjusting to the US and American society, homesickness, different foods and adjusting to a new educational system,â&#x20AC;? said Cabasco. Due to the number of international students in recent years, Whitman created a Buddy Program for incoming

international students, now in its third year. This program matches rising sophomores with international students for one semester so that thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a network beyond institutional departments. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think it is a nice idea and great opportunity to meet upperclassmen and make more friends on campus with people with whom you would not normally be in contact,â&#x20AC;? said Ivana Vukovic, a firstyear from Montenegro. The Academic Resource Center offers tutoring for students who speak English as a second language as part of the

Greenhouse program. This resource is in its fourth semester. Barry also organizes a three-day international student orientation prior to the beginning of school each year. This orientation includes a chance for the international students to bond with each other and meet their student academic advisers prior to new student orientation. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I thought the camp was good because we got to know a couple of people before starting college, which was nice because those are still good friends of mine,â&#x20AC;? said Wadia.

EGGERS: Students see Zeitouns beyond the book ď?Śď?˛ď?Żď? page 1 â&#x20AC;&#x153;They are just humble people who have done really amazing things,â&#x20AC;? she said. She also enjoyed comparing the book portrayal of Kathy and Abdulrahman Zeitoun with what she observed during the lecture. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was nice to see that the book was true to how they are,â&#x20AC;? she said. Andrew Johnson â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;09, the Resident Director of Lyman House, believes that seeing the Zeitouns in person can add to oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s understanding of the book. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Having the Zeitouns here gives us an opportunity to look at the text differently--not just as a work to analyze,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Academic analysis is wonderful, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also important to realize that the Zeitouns are not just characters. It adds a layer of depth to the book and makes our challenge as young scholars much greater. We have to be honest to these people while we analyze.â&#x20AC;? Students said the conversational format was beneficial in depicting the reality of the Zeitounsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; story. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was more relaxed,â&#x20AC;? said Savino.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;In this setting, the conversation could go where it wanted. And it was nice to see the dynamic between Kathy and Abdulrahman and Eggers. They seemed to be genuinely good friends.â&#x20AC;? In this relaxed setting, the audience was also able to see the Zeitounsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; personalities. Despite the fact they had arrived in Walla Walla only an hour before the discussion due to flight delays, both Kathy and Abdulrahman seemed quite comfortable throughout the presentation. They even joked with each other and with Eggers. Kathy said that when Eggers first came to interview them, she and Abdulrahman were not exactly sure who he was but didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think to look him up. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Google him until the third year of interviews,â&#x20AC;? Kathy said as the audience laughed. First-year Jenni Doering was especially glad that the audience could interact with the author and with the Zeitouns. â&#x20AC;&#x153;What Eggers wrote was important to him, but his importance is different than what we as readers found imporADVERTISEMENT

tant. By asking questions, the audience could address what they found most important,â&#x20AC;? she said. The final question of the discussion was particularly powerful. A student asked Eggers whether or not he believed it was true that this generation-the generation of Whitman College students--lacks empathy. Eggers said that there is nothing less accurate. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This generation is well-informed, globally-thinking and activist-minded,â&#x20AC;? he said. This is important because the goal of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Zeitoun,â&#x20AC;? he said, is to make it so that the readers might empathize with people different than themselves. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Having â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Zeitounâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; chosen as the selected book for an incoming class is the ultimate validation that I have accomplished something,â&#x20AC;? he said. Sophomore Erin Carnahan believes that Eggersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s words are a call to action. â&#x20AC;&#x153;What he said about our generation is a compliment and also a challenge. We need to make it a goal of ours to be well-informed, globally-thinking, and activist-minded.â&#x20AC;?

A&E

The Pioneer ISSUE 3 SEP 30, 2010 Page 4

quarterlife struggles to find niche at Whitman by MCCAULAY SINGERMILNES Staff Reporter

FENNELL Meitzler’s works cover the walls of the Sheehan Gallery. Gallery Director Dawn Forbes used Meitzler’s personal journals and documents, given to her shortly before his death, to arrange the exhibit according to his personal and aesthetic preferences.

Journals shape art exhibit by NANYONJO MUKUNGU Staff Reporter

Pacific Northwest artist Neil Meitzler was helping Sheehan Gallery Director Dawn Forbes prepare the first exhibition of the year, “Spectra, Stream, Strata,” which showcased his work, when he died of pancreatic cancer. Shortly before his death in 2009, Forbes acquired many of his journals depicting his travels and schooling at the Northwest School in Seattle, Wash. during the late 1950s. From his struggles with Seventh Day Adventism to the inspiration he took from Asian art and poetry, his journals allowed Forbes a glimpse into his mind. “His journal was filled with words of all kinds of different artists and philosophers,”said Forbes, director of the Sheehan Gallery. A private person, Meitzler often did not explain his work or title his pieces, even to those to whom he felt closest. Only after receiving his personal documents was

Forbes was able to deeply understand his work and their significance. “[Meitzler wanted people] to form their own relationship with the work and come away with their own story,” said Forbes. Meitzler’s works often evoke the recurring theme of rebirth that he experienced in his life. Through his usage of blues and other natural colors, his worked has been closely linked to the discovery of the mythic and poetic within nature. Later on in his life, experiences of loss are noted through his dramatic red color palette and the depictions of destroyed landscapes. “[He utilized art] to pull himself out of a very deep place of darkness,” said Forbes. Meitzler also struggled with his relationship to his Seventh Day Adventist background. He felt moved by Christian iconography, but struggled with his sexuality and its perceptions in relation to his family and the world around him. This struggle also impacts much of his

artwork. Senior politics major Mara ChangNorthway interpreted Meitzler’s work through her particular adademic leanings. “It’s not afraid to address political issues and the politics of human interaction with nature,” said Chang-Northway. The inclusion of Meitzler further reflects Sheehan Gallery’s belief in the power of the evolving artist as conveyed in his or her work. “What I love about the variety that was chosen for the show [is that] it shows that artists go through so many movements and different styles to get to their own identity and each one of those reflects him in a different way,” said Exhibitions and Collections Manager Kynde Kiefel. Through such collections, the Sheehan Gallery works to deconstruct the myth of the exclusivity of art. The last days to see Meitzler’s “Spectra, Stream, Strata” exhibit are Sept. 30 and Oct. 1.

‘Close Encounters’ offers powerful performances

Because students have become so accustomed to the 20 plus sculptures on Whitman’s campus, it’s easy to take the artwork for granted. Yet, these sculptures are some of the very features that make Whitman College unique. Few colleges have as large of a range of sculptures on campus. “As public art, [Whitman campus’] sculpture enriches the campus landscape for visitors, members of the Walla Walla community and those of us who have the privilege of living and working here,” said President George Bridges. “By creating opportunities for inspiration and adding aesthetic value to our campus grounds, its presence significantly enhances how we can connect emotionally and psychologically with Whitman’s outdoor spaces.” Below, The Pioneer provides some historical context to a select number of sculptures on campus. “Carnival”: This colorful piece is actually a headless, abstract version of the classic of Venus De Milo. Jim Dine, a nationally-renowned pop artist, created “Carnival” in 1997. Dine used a chainsaw to create the sculpture from the trunk of a tree, and then cast the tree in bronze at the Walla Walla Foundry. The foundry itself is owned and operated by Whitman alum Mark Anderson ‘78.

movie. It’s not for everyone. Very little happens for a long time. Characters tend to stew in their own confusion rather Steven Spielberg loves aliens. He loves than generate a plot. There are plenty of sappy, magical aliens like E.T. and the tense, empty scenes that trade dialogue hulking, faceless tripods of “War of the for beautiful special effects. Tension Worlds.” He directed the little monsters builds and builds, and the climax lasts for of “Gremlins” and was executive produc- nearly an hour. er on “Men in Black.” If you can sit through The same year that the nail-biting, however, George Lucas came the movie is incredout with “Star Wars,” ibly rewarding. Over the Spielberg produced course of more than two what is perhaps his hours, the film switches most powerful (and slowly from global thrillwithout a doubt his er to a beautiful, abstract prettiest) alien film— exploration of music and “Close Encounters of color. It’s much more the Third Kind.” “2001: A Space Odyssey” Richard Dreyfuss (Stanley Kubrick) than plays a manic, goofy it is “Signs” (M. Night electrician named Shyamalan). Roy. A strange, beauFor much of the film, tiful night of floating Steven Spielberg’s John William’s beautilights leaves him sun“Close Encounters” ful score is silent if not burnt on half his face barely present. Instead, and seized with the image of a mountain the music of the movie comes in fits and that he sculpts obsessively out of mud, starts. Record players go haywire. Musical shaving cream and potatoes. His family, toys turn themselves on. A strange drifter his job and his neighbors slowly drop whistles a lonely tune. As the movie proout of the picture. He’s joined by a hang- gresses, the score swells to prominence, dog single mom obsessed with the same and the musical elements of the plot bemountain. The world they’ve shut out come more pronounced. If you like slow changes dramatically. films from the 70s, space or laser light “Close Encounters” is a slow, placid shows, this movie is worth renting. by SEAN MCNULTY Staff Reporter

HONG

Campus sculpture collection features alumni, community artists’ works Staff Reporter

Under the direction of new editor-inchief senior Naomi Gibbs, quarterlife, one of Whitman College’s literary magazine, is seeking to extend its reach both inside and outside the Whitman community in an attempt to better capture the creative pulse of the contemporary college generation. Though quarterlife has been a presence at Whitman for the past five years, it still is attempting to find a solid niche on campus. “quarterlife is still a pretty young publication, and we are always seeking to evolve but also really cement what quarterlife is and establish a permanent identity for it within the Whitman community,” said Gibbs. With this objective in mind, the staff desires to invite student participation through new mediums and more provocative themes. “Traditionally the themes have been quippy phrases that are provocative in their double meaning, but we’re thinking of doing a visual theme or perhaps a musical theme later on in the year to reach out to people in a different way,” said Gibbs. The first theme of four issues of quarterlife is “Catch and Release.” “I hope the theme ‘Catch and Release’ really draws out good writing and good artwork from the community,” said Gibbs. In addition, staffers are looking to broaden the styles of writing that have been previously featured in quarterlife, while still maintaining its integrity as an influential and thought-provoking literary magazine. “One thing that people in the past had against quarterlife was that they put a lot of the writers that had a specific type of writing style in it. I would really like to see us break away from that,” said selections member senior Ari Frink. Junior Paris White added to this sentiment with her view that the magazine

still has room for growth. “I feel like literary magazines on campus are more important for the space they create than anything else,” said White. “I just wish more people read what fills that space. This is probably just my cynicism, but quarterlife seems to exist more for its writers than its readers at this point.” However, quarterlife does not want to sacrifice the quality of the work for the sake of variety. “I think it’s best to do one thing and do it well,” Frink said. Breaking from earlier conventions, the forthcoming issue will feature individualized title pieces for each page. The authors of the selected works will be able to choose from a sample of three art pieces drawn by staff illustrators to accompany their contribution and represent it in a visual format. The tensions of finding a niche at Whitman has also been a result of its likening to Whitman’s annual art and literary magazine blue moon. Despite inevitable comparisons, staffers are eager to define the differences between the two. “In my experience with submissions for blue moon and submissions for quarterlife, I see quarterlife as a space for Whitman’s authors to experiment with things in a less high stakes format and to have the ability to try some new things,” said Frink. Regardless of perceived differences or similarities, quarterlife serves a unique function as a much appreciated creative outlet. “I think it’s really important not just to promote the creative writing and artwork that is being done by the student population but to try and put the spirit of creativity out there and celebrate what’s being done outside of class,” said Gibbs. Submissions for the next issue of quarterlife are due no later than midnight on Friday, Oct. 1. Send submissions electronically to quarterlife@ whitman.edu.

MOVIE REVIEW

From left to right: Micajah Bienvenu’s ‘86 “Pirouette”; Deborah Butterfield’s “Styx”; and former art professor Keiko Harra’s “Topophilia Gates”.

by NATE LESSLER

“What I’ve come to realize through [an environmental aesthetics course] is that it’s more of a tool being used to help us think about beauty,” said sophomore Kenn Kochi, who is currently taking a course that discusses Dine’s piece. “So as a sculpture, do I find it beautiful? I don’t know, but it does help me think about beauty as a whole.” “Styx”: Located at the edge of Ankeny Field, “Styx” is one of the most well-known sculptures on campus. The piece was crafted by Deborah Butterfield, an American artist known in particular for her sculptures of horses. “The first time I heard [Styx] was made of metal, I didn’t believe it,” said junior Scott Cassidy. “Even when you are inches away it looks like wood.” Even upon close inspection, the sculpture still appears to be made out of wood. Only when one actually touches (or climbs on) “Styx” does it become obvious that the materials are metallic. To create the sculpture, Butterfield collected driftwood from both the Columbia and Snake River. The driftwood sculpture was transformed into bronze at the Walla Walla Foundry. “Topophilia Gates”: “Topophila Gates” stands in the creek running in front of Prentiss Hall. The sculpture consists of three gateways made out of metal and colorful glass with water running through them. Keiko Harra, an art professor at Whitman from 19852006, created the piece in 1999. Seeing

as Topophilia means “love for a place,” the name of the gates is suited for its environment as a place of reflection. According to Herra, the inspiration for the piece came from a specific temple on top of a mountain in Japan that has multiple gates leading to a shrine. “Three Stories”: Artist Squire Broel found the inspiration for “Three Stories” from the vibrant fish markets of Hong Kong. Broel originally created the design for a competition. After the piece was not selected, Anderson suggested that Broel craft it anyway. With the assistance of two Whitman student interns, Broel rendered the sculpture out of clay at the Walla Walla Foundry. “Three Stories” was first displayed in an art exhibition at the Sheehan Gallery in Olin Hall, and then purchased by the college and added to the campus in 1997. A major theme which Broel believes is evoked by the sculpture is balance. “The fish--a symbol of prosperity--is missing its flowing fins and is marked with deep and jutting scars, “ he said of the piece. “The golden lemon is so inviting, but its taste is sharp and bitter. The bowl--a fragile vessel--is precariously balanced and reveals its true contents. We have to continually ask ourselves if we are seeking a life of balance. Hopefully, we are all living intentionally and continually developing a greater understanding of our place in our local communities as well as the

broader world.” “Soaring Stones #4”: As one of the most recent additions to the series of sculptures on campus, “Soaring Stones #4” was installed outside of Cordiner Hall in 2007. “Soaring Stones #4” consists of a row of six boulders from the Cascade Mountains, each boulder mounted upon a shiny steel pillar. The sculpture was originally created in 1990 by John T. Young, and was located along a sidewalk in downtown Portland, Ore. However, the sculpture was removed in 2006 in order to make way for public transportation. “Pirouette”: Micajah Bienvenu ‘86 was commissioned by the college to create this stainless steel sculpture inspired by a series of other spiral sculp-

tures he had then recently created. Bienvenu used a three-dimensional design software to design the piece. Acquired by Whitman in 2004, “Pirouette” now stands near the Hall of Music. “It seemed appropriate outside the music hall,” said Bienvenu. “It’s a sort of musical, uplifting and inspirational piece.” Another of Bienvenu’s sculptures, “Triumphant Arc,” stands in front of Harper Joy Theatre. “It’s a great collection,” said Bienvenu of the college’s sculpture exhibition. “I hope it grows more and more. I think it’s something that should be celebrated . . . Sculptures can make people stop, think, talk and become icons for places.”

A&E

September 30, 2010

THRIFTY WHITTIES

Easy Fix-it: Darn that hole! by OLIVIA JONES Columnist

It happens to everyone. Every day someone you care about finds a hole in a wellbeloved item of clothing. The initial shock is too much for many of them, despair sets in and they lose hope of ever wearing that shirt again. Or, they continue wearing and washing the garment until the hole is so big that their mother tosses it in the rag pile when they are home for break. It does not have to happen this way; in fact, it is surprisingly easy to save that beloved shirt, skirt or pair of pants. If the garment is made from a knit fabric, a thrifty Whittie can repair any hole under the size of a quarter easily with a needle and thread. If the garment is woven, or your favorite pair of jeans, tune in for the next issue of Thrifty Whitties, which will cover patching. Darning is difficult to understand without a visual, so I recommend for the beginner to look at a picture of a darned garment on Google to understand the basic idea. To begin, find a color thread that will match the garment you want to repair. By the time you have finished darning, a lot of thread will be concentrated in one small spot, so it is important to make sure the color of the thread is well-matched to the color of the garment. Some people like to decorate with a contrasting color, but be prepared for your stitch work to be a lot easier to inspect if you choose to do so. If you have the option, I prefer to work with a cotton-covered polyester thread, often labeled “dual duty.” This type of

ROLLE thread is usually the most easily manipulated, and it runs the smoothest through a sewing machine. If you are a meticulous person, it might behoove you to wax the thread before you start. That will make the thread stay neat-

er as you work with it. How to do this is to drag the thread tautly across a candle or ball of wax. If you have exerted enough pressure, the thread should leave a thin straight line in the wax. Then lay the waxed string on a paper towel and run a hot iron quickly over the length of it. This step is optional. The first step of darning is to sew around the perimeter of the hole. Stay approximately a quarter of an inch away from the hole; simply stitch around it using a back or plain stitch. Once this is complete, sew loose parallel stitches across the hole from perimeter stitch to perimeter stitch. Try to keep each stitch as parallel to the previous as you can. It is very important not to pull the stitches taut or you will pucker the garment at the darned area. If you have any experience weaving, the next step will be easy for you. Start at one end of the patch and run parallel stitches in the opposite direction, perpendicular to the previous stitches. Again make sure to start and end on the perimeter stitch. This time, however, you have to weave the thread between the threads running perpendicular. Over one, under the next and repeat until you are finished. When you have covered the entire area of the perimeter stitch, you can tie off the thread. Your first attempt may not look perfect, but as soon as you understand the concept, it is easier to finesse. Make sure to read next week for an explanation on patching.

Northwest Navy band tour comes to town by NICK MICHAL Staff Reporter

Chief musician Patrick Hawes, impeccably adorned in dress uniform, threw his right hand forcefully down and with it, Cordiner Hall was brought to a fleeting silence before the eruption of a thunderous applause. Hawes nodded, gave a brief thank you, and then returned to his seat to do it all over again. This past Wednesday, Sept. 22, the Northwest Navy Band Cascade performed hits both new and old, and as a result, brought the spirit of big band music to Whitman College. The band started with a stirring version of the Duke Ellington hit, “Take the A-Train.” They followed with a selection of more contemporary hits, including Stevie Wonder’s “Isn’t She Lovely.” After this, things started really picking up. Stephanie Brainard, who sang the national anthem to open the concert, took up vocals and performed a string of Johnny Mercer hits, including “I Thought About You” and “Satin Doll.” She did an exquisite job, hearkening back to the styles of the great big band vocalists Peggy Lee and Billie Holiday. The audience, mostly comprised of community members but dotted with Whitman students, was warmly receptive of Brainard, but had little time to rest before the next song, “Bread and Watrous”, which references the great jazz trombonist Bill Watrous. Rich

Hanks, the trombone player in Cascade, channeled Watrous as he performed an impeccable solo, his face turning red while he played. Another impressive solo came from the drummer during “Sing Sing Sing”, a selection of which was included in a big band medley. The track, usually helmed by the unequaled Gene Krupa, was performed with style and panache--his hands flashing around the drum kit like a force field of energy. He soloed for a good five minutes, including a particularly stirring passage where the rest of the band left the stage, further accentuating his frenetic performance. “I was blown away by it,” said junior Eric Werner. “That guy’s got chops.” The most surprising thing, however, wasn’t the music. It was that the band came here free of charge. “They don’t charge anything,” said David Glenn, professor of music and organizer of the event. “It’s taxpayer dollars that pays for it.” This highlighted the idea that the band is really a service to communities in the United States, which was echoed in Hawes’s assertion that they play around 400 shows a year. Glenn differentiated this event from other shows, however, in that big band stylings are rarely represented at Whitman. “Usually, it’s impossible to get a big band . . . They cost way too much money,” added Glenn. “It was very effective, and well played.”

BOOK REVIEW

Petrushevskaya’s ‘Scary Fairy Tales’ disturb, thrill by ELLIE GOLD Book Reviewer

Ludmilla Petrushevskaya was born in 1938 in Moscow. Her fiction was banned in Soviet Russia, despite her studied avoidance of overtly political themes. The bleakness of Petrushevskaya’s depictions of life in Soviet Russia, translators Keith Gessen and Anna Summers suggest in their introduction, was too depressing for the way the country imagined its own culture. She was published as a playwright, but remained a controversial writer, banned until the disintegration of the USSR. Since then, Petrushevskaya has become “Russia’s best-known living writer” and has won numerous awards in the past twenty years, “unrivaled in the scope and diversity of her talent.”

“There Once Lived a Woman Who Tried to Kill Her Neighbor’s Baby”, by Ludmilla Petrushevskaya, 206 pages

“There Once Lived a Woman Who Tried to Kill Her Neighbor’s Baby”, the most recent major translation of Petrushevskaya’s short fiction into English since “Immortal Love” in 1995, is a collection of stories that are at once bleak, horrifying and wistful. Gessen and Summers selected what the book’s subtitle calls “Scary Fairy Tales”, Petrushevskaya’s short fiction which depict mystical and fantastic themes. The stories are divided into four parts: “Songs of the Eastern Slavs”, “Allegories”, “Requiems” and “Fairy Tales”. Each of these contains sets of stories gathered around a nebulous theme. Gessen and Summers describe them as “dark, surreal vignettes,” “apocalyptic stories”, “human relationships under duress” and “real fairy tales”, respectively. Overall, the stories fit together more thematically than the sections do, but it is true that the stories in, say, “Allegories” involve human relationships as a more obvious theme than the other stories that are grouped together. Very few of Petrushevskaya’s characters have names, giving these stories even more of a fairy-tale effect than they already have. They are “the father”, “the mother”, “the grandfather” or “the girl.” Like fairy tales, these stories involve more action than emotional response; the characters are depicted doing things, reacting without thought,

yet that doesn’t mean they are unsympathetic. Some of the stories—“The Shadow Life”, “The Miracle” and “The Black Coat”, for example— are heartbreaking. Ho w e v e r,

SHOW OF THE WEEK

contributed by

CANEPA read these stories sparingly. Too many and they become almost predictable; the unease of a surreal story depends as much on the reader’s confusion as it does on the characters’. If this collection has a failure, that is it. Individually, however, these stories

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than it sounds. In fact, “trite” is not a word that can be applied to Petrushevskaya’s stories; even the ones with nearly saccharine endings (or middles) have a core of disquiet. That disquiet keeps this collection new and unique. Each short story— some of them are no more than three pages—is disturbing, raw and absolutely thrilling.

KWCW 90.5

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are remarkably beautiful; horrifying, yes, but also melancholy. They are bleak, but in many of them there is a core of hope that keeps the story going. In “The Father,” a man searches for his child and finds a family; in “The

Shadow Life”, a girl is saved from her rapists by a woman who looks like her dead mother; in “There’s Someone in the House”, a woman plagued by a poltergeist destroys her own house in a preemptive attack, and rediscovers her own will to live. Trust me, it’s less trite

KWCW

“Tom and Dave In The Morning”, hosted by brothers junior Sam and first-year Toby Alden, is a “highly condensed hour of music from [their] respective fringe obsession genres, audio clips from video games, ambient sound effects, electronic noodling and beyond.” Every sound on the show is carefully stitched together on either the state of the art-audio editing program Ableton Live (for Toby’s half) or the “laughably craptastic comeswith-the-laptop Kidz-Kan-MakeTunez-quality” audio editing program GarageBand (Sam’s half). The brothers crack jokes in between songs. “If we were characters on ‘Friends’ Toby would be Jason Fox and I would be Seth Cohen,” said Sam Alden. “Tom and Dave In The Morning” airs every Thursday Night at 11 p.m. on KWCW 90.5 FM. It can also be streamed online through www.kwcw. net.

Opinion

The Pioneer ISSUE 3 SEP 30, 2010 Page 6

Speech reflects insecurities

DING LI Columnist

When Haley asked what I considered to be the most annoying American behavior, I hesitated for a while, weighing whether it would offend her should I say that the constant “like” and the repetitive “you know” really confuses and irri-

tates me. The first time I noticed people overusing such filler words was during the allresidents meeting. I was counting, not how many pages of reading I had left to finish, nor how many nickels I had piled up in my purse, but how many times the speaker used the phrase “you know.” I did not already know anything she was saying. Although I concentrated all my attention on her explanation, I was constantly distracted by the “you know.” Every time I heard a “you know” in that doubtful tone, I struggled to think about what I was supposed to know. The next time I met the girl, I asked whether she could recognize herself saying the repetitive “you know” phrase. “No, it’s kinda natural to say, you know?” she answered. Apparently I didn’t know. She also remarked that she does not notice others’ references to “you know” when in conversation. I observe this because I am a foreigner and it simply doesn’t make any sense to me to add “you know” together with a questioning tone after it. It’s true that it does not matter, like, you know, that these phrases only cause me confusion if everyone else can understand them well. But stop and think—what’s behind all these “likes” and “you knows”? America is famous for its casual culture with its “like” rather than “is”; it’s “you know?” rather than a firm ending; and it’s “or whatever” rather than a solid statement. My housemate comforted me when I told him that I couldn’t speak up in class for fear of making mistakes. “Don’t be afraid with Americans because they are casual, and they don’t really care what you are saying,” he told me jokingly.

Thanks, casualness, for helping us to speak up, but we won’t let you obscure our ideas. It’s annoying to attach “you know?” to the end of a speech with a shrug, a leaning head and two hands open. It sounds like you’re saying, “I am not a hundred percent sure about what I just said,” or, “I am just telling you the general truth, you know? It’s not something that deserves arguing,” or, “You know, I don’t really give a damn about what I said. Oh, I am just inviting you to join in my talk.” You don’t realize how much information you are giving about your mind. In one of my classes we were discussing President George W. Bush’s aggressive preemptive national security strategy against terrorism after the 9/11 attacks, while I was again awkwardly stalking others’ “likes” and “you knows.” “It was like, you know, the war in the Middle East, it’s like, crazy…” one of the students said. Is the war against Iraq, in fact, crazy or, as the student said, “like, crazy?” Bush asserted in his West Point speech in 2002 that “some worry that it is somehow undiplomatic or impolite to speak the language of right and wrong. I disagree.” He urged citizens to take a strong and resolute attitude in diplomacy. How could he be so resolute even though the decision of starting a preemptive war was so wrong while we cannot even explain our ideas with a firm tone? Are we afraid of triggering disputes over what we just said and putting ourselves on the spot, as what happened to President Bush in terms of his Iraq War? Taylor Mali, an American slam poet, observed in his poem “Like, you know…” that America’s “like”, “you know”, “whatever” phase will lead us nowhere. He entreated at the end of the poem, “To speak with conviction. To say what you believe in a manner that bespeaks the determination with which you believe it.” Eventually, I told Haley about all the “like” and “you know” speaking behaviors. I was so embarrassed to find myself using “like” so much as my brain quickly tried to search suitable words for the explanation. It’s challenging to get rid of the habit, I know, and I am struggling with this, but it’s worth a try as long as you can make yourself clearly understood and honest to your own opinion.

ALDEN

Zeitoun: Whitman should institute classes to further explore summer reading texts  page 1 Although the faculty panel and discussion of “Zeitoun” in residential sections deepened my understanding of this fantastic book, they left so much untouched within this provocative text. The book is beyond worthy of discussion in Encounters classes. As the summer reading assignment for all first-year students, it is illogical that the text is not discussed in a class devoted to creating shared knowledge amongst students. Conversations about “Zeitoun” would incorporate dozens of academic disciplines. As an English Literature nerd, I would love to further examine the journalistic style and narrative pace of the book. The social scientist in me begs to know if Zeitoun’s arrest was caused by unique, isolated factors or if the views of the arresting officers encapsulate a larger social phenomenon. Thinking politically, I am curious if Hurricane Katrina acted as a catalyst

Gadgets thrive on competition; older technology not automatically obsolete There’s much talk of killing in many commentaries about gadgets these days. Every new smartphone is looked at as a potential iPhone killer. BLAIR With all this talk FRANK of death, it would Columnist seem that the iPad has a set of cross hairs on its aluminum shell. All this killing is problematic though as it almost never happens as predicted. Talking about killing seems simple and snappy. After all, it’s dramatic and violent. But when I go buy a gadget, I don’t care about what’s killing what. What I want is a product that gives me all the features that I’m looking for. Where it sits in the market could matter less to me, so long as I have something that works the way I want it to. Personally I love my iPhone. It does everything I want it to do the way I want it to be done. However, that

doesn’t mean that it’s necessarily right for you. I know people who are equally married to their Droid, Palm Pre or Blackberry. That’s okay, too—there’s room for more than one product in a given sector. New laptops from Dell don’t make other laptops obsolete. The fact that a new Android phone comes out (which seems to happen every month or so) doesn’t mean that the iPhone’s days are numbered. It just means that there’s more competition in the realm of smartphones. In tech journalism, calling something a killer is just a cop-out, a sort of intellectually vacant shorthand that allows for easy, unintelligent analysis. Why not judge a product on its merits? Samsung announced the Galaxy Tab, which is important not because its name sounds like a brand of interstellar hipster cola, but because it’s an “iPad-killer,” as CNET’s Marguerite Reardon noted on her “Signal Strength” blog. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that the Galaxy Tab will not single-handedly cause Apple to pull

the iPad from stores. Odds are that another product won’t be able to do it either. However, that doesn’t stop technology journalists from wasting their breaths talking about whether or not the Galaxy Tab can kill the iPad. Who cares? The story that we should be caring about is not whether or not the Galaxy Tab will be able to unseat the iPad from a position of market dominance. Instead, what’s important is a given product’s merits. Of course it makes sense to compare a new product to a market leader in order to find similarities and differences. But a great product should be able to stand on its own, not in competition with something else. Here’s the bottom line: worrying about whether or not a new product will be able to kill another product is a waste of everyone’s time. There’s room for more than one product in a given market, and competition is good. Succumbing to the idea that somehow every product must perfectly replace every other product that came before it is dumb.

POLI T IC AL C ARTOON

DOUGLAS

for reform in the Louisiana justice system. Zeitoun’s tale makes this a work suitable for critical class discourse. Finding a book that is so readable or applicable to modern life is a tremendous feat. “Zeitoun” spotlights a myriad of social and political issues. It asks readers to examine their perceptions of Muslim Americans. It exposes the unregulated justice system created in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. It highlights the misallocation of resources in a time of crisis. It tells the uniquely human story of man who rides out the storm with tremendous courage. Within each of these exist many nuances and complexities. That is precisely why “Zeitoun” must become a part of the Encounters curriculum. Encounters seeks to explore great works ancient and modern. “Zeitoun” presents the unique opportunity not just to deliberate on a great piece of writing, but to spur conversations about issues influencing modern society. The relevancy and sweep of the

work with regard to modern life seems unparalleled when compared to other Encounters texts. Judging by the crowd at Egger’s appearance, “Zeitoun” interests many in the community beyond first-year students. Furthermore, a one credit evening seminar on the book and the injustices it exposes would let all who enjoyed the book find deeper meaning in its pages. Thus far Whitman has passed up a great opportunity for learning, but luckily it is not too late to change that. With Zeitoun’s story fresh in the minds and hearts of the Whitman community, now is the perfect time for Encounters classes to devote further examination of “Zeitoun.” The most powerful aspect about discussing “Zeitoun” is that it leads to an examination of some of the most challenging issues facing society today. “Zeitoun” is powerful tool waiting to be used. I challenge Whitman to use it to build understanding and intellectual vitality.

LET T ER TO T HE EDI TOR Dear Editor, In regards to Zach Duffy’s article on implementing a mandatory volunteer policy I present to you the following picture . . . Shovels dig into the freshly ground dirt outside a Habitat for Humanity house as a troop of Whitman volunteers smile in the early morning sunrise. Gary, the volunteer manager, laughs along with the students as he shows them how to hammer up drywall and work a band saw. I don’t know about most Whitman students, but this is one of the pictures that comes to my mind when I think about the volunteering community at Whitman. As Zach Duffy so aptly pointed out, in his article published in last week’s issue, the Center for Community Service coordinates many well-run programs and even leads service trips before school and during breaks. The students that volunteer are ambitious, busy and sometimes tired, but they always make time for helping out their community. Why then should we force the entire Whitman campus to participate in an activity that they always had access to but failed to appreciate? Why should non-committed volunteers be forced to participate in programs in which they don’t have time for and don’t want to do? Why should the communities of Walla Walla be saturated by Whitman students only seeking to fulfill yet another prerequisite for graduation? The idea of Whitman implementing mandatory volunteer hours is one I find degrading to all current volunteers, and frankly, as a matter of principle, it disgusts me. A volunteer, as defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, is “a person who provides a service willingly and without pay.” If Whitman forced students to volunteer, not only would they not be willing, but the price of their “free service” would then be considered their diploma, their thesis, or their bachelor’s degree. Volunteering then ceases to be “volunteering” in the strict sense of the word and becomes something else entirely, “mandatory work hours” perhaps. Mr. Duffy criticized Whitman for viewing volunteering as a “purely selfless act,” but isn’t that what it should be? Volunteering at Whitman is a way for students to get out in the community and see what the world outside of campus is really like.

It is a way for them to meet new people and expand on their ideas outside of the classroom and their dorm rooms, but it is also something they should choose to do for themselves. Without that choice, it becomes yet another freshman complaint. Like Core (now known as Encounters) a volunteering requirement would only promote freshman bonding under the guise of group grumbling about getting up early to work on a house or rake a lawn. Contrary to last week’s article, mandatory volunteer hours will not magically change the intrinsic nature of all Whitties, forcing us to become model citizens. Furthermore, what would Whitman’s implementation of a volunteering incentive really say about the college’s philosophy? That in order to do something nice and be a good citizen, there has to be a reward involved? That we are not trying to give people the tools in which to make their own decisions but rather forcing them to do what “The Man” knows will be best for them? I thought the whole point of a liberal arts education was to allow people to formulate their own ideas. The fact is real life, outside Ankeny and Jewett won’t give you an incentive to volunteer. Your incentive to volunteer is yourself and your own need to connect with people different than you. A Whitman volunteer incentive will only result in future moral laxity of the campus population. If someone in your life is always telling you what to do and why you should do it, you will eventually fail to see the point in it yourself. Volunteering is special and good for self morale precisely because people are freely choosing to do it. Without that aspect, the point behind volunteering is gone and therefore so is the notion that an incentive for service will ever produce the benefits to which Mr. Duffy refers. If Whitman wants to prepare its students for life and leadership, the last thing it should be doing is spoon-feeding them morality in the form of yet another graduation requirement. In real life, no one requires you to go out and get involved; you have to figure it out by yourself. Why should Whitman be any different? Yours Sincerely, Rachel Sicheneder, ‘11

Sports

The Pioneer ISSUE 3 SEP 30, 2010 Page 7

Whitman welcomes new head trainer Eckel by TYLER HURLBURT Staff Reporter

BOWMAN Head trainer John Eckel examines a student athlete in the Sherwood Training Room.

CLUB: Athletes frustrated with unequal treatment  page 1 belief. “Including weight lifting, [the team practices for] probably 12 to 16 hours per week,” he said. One of the biggest differences between varsity and club sports is that the latter are largely student-run. “Club sports are a function of student interest where a student says, ‘I love this sport and want to be a part of this sport and I want to participate in it,’’ Snider said. The other main area in which the two levels of athletics differ is the size of the respective budgets and amount of funds that the athletes are expected to provide for themselves. Paying for full-time faculty coaches takes up a large portion of a varsity team’s budget, while club sports either do not have a coach or use volunteer coaches, like Schmitz. For the many club sports that lack a coach, team leaders are relied upon to fulfill coaching duties. But club athletes are expected to make some sacrifices when it comes to travel expenses to stay within their set budget. The men’s lacrosse team drives themselves to away games and tournaments. The ultimate Frisbee team buys all their own food while traveling for matches. The women’s lacrosse team will often stay at players’ houses when traveling to Seattle and Portland. The biggest qualm for many club athletes is that they do not have access to the athletic training room. Varsity athletes have access to the training room for prevention and rehab of athletic injuries; club teams do not receive this kind of treat-

ment. The ultimate Frisbee team, however, is currently trying to work out a solution to this discrepancy with the training room. Head Athletic Trainer John Eckel sees that something should be done regarding injury prevention and rehab for club athletes, but realizes that the training room currently does not have the room or staff available. “We just don’t have the staff. We’re pretty overextended as it is with the varsity athletes,” Eckel said. “But I agree that something needs to be done.” Sophomore Abbye Neel, member of the women’s lacrosse team, believes that the athletic department treats club sports as second-class athletics compared to the varsity programs. “I feel like they just kind of just throw us to the side,” Neel said. “They don’t pay a whole lot of attention to us.” However, the athletic department insists that they are very committed to all student athletes. “We have never—and we keep looking—found another school in our peer group that even comes close to the resources—funding and facilities—that we put into club sports,” Snider said. Scott Shields, current cross-country head coach, former women’s soccer head coach and varsity and club athlete in his time at Whitman, feels that both varsity and club sports are essential for the college and that, although the two are different entities, they boil down to the same thing. “I know people like to compare them and say this or that, but it shouldn’t be that way,” Shields said. “We should respect each other for what we do and celebrate [being athletes].”

At the beginning of this year Whitman College welcomed John Eckel, new head trainer, to the Athletic Training Center. Eckel, who previously worked as the head trainer at New York University for 22 years, comes most recently from working at two high schools in Hawaii. Eckel replaces Brooke Kennedy who held the position for the past year on an interim basis. Kennedy took over after former head athletic trainer Juli Dunn vacated her position to undertake a new career as director of the Academic Resource Center after the 2009 school year. On any given day Eckel is occupied with around 75 varsity athletes walking through his doors looking for help with injury prevention and rehabilitation. He also often works during home sporting events, helping both the Missionaries and any visiting athletes. Eckel has been very impressed with the school so far. In particular, he enjoys the one year-old training room itself, which is located in the newly renovated Sherwood Athletic Center. “For this size of school I don’t think you’re going to find a better facility,” Eckel said. He is also very thankful for an athletic department that is closely connected and accommodating, which forms a contrast to the department he worked with at NYU. “Everybody seems to get along here

which is different than New York,” he said. “There is more attitude in New York than there is here.” Even though he has been at Whitman for little over a month, he has already made an impact on how the training room is run. Sophomore volleyball player Hannah Holloran has noticed an increase in the structure and order of the facility. “It is a lot more professional than last year,” Holloran said. The professionalism noted by Holloran is one aspect of the job in which Eckel takes pride. “This is a health care facility and it should be run as such. You want to have a professional atmosphere,” he said. Beyond this awareness of and increase in professionalism, there are no major changes that Eckel sees himself implementing in the coming year. So far, the consensus amongst varsity athletes is that Eckel is very competent in what he does. Both Holloran and sophomore basketball player Drew Raher further this point with their belief that Eckel genuinely cares about the athletes. “He is a lot more involved,” Raher said. “He really cares about the individual, not just about efficiency,” Holloran said. One particular change from which Raher personally benefits is Eckel’s choice of training room music. “He likes country music, which I enjoy, but the rest of the team doesn’t,” he added.

Fall triathlon approaches by LIBBY ARNOSTI Staff Reporter

Watch out for runners and bikers darting through the streets of Walla Walla early Saturday morning, Oct. 2. Participants from all athletic backgrounds will be rising to the challenge of the annual fall triathlon, organized by the Whitman College swim team. The event, which has been a swim team tradition for over 20 years, is “part fund-raiser, part community event,” said Jennifer Blomme, the head swim coach at Whitman. “It brings folks together from various parts of campus, from Walla Walla and even from out of town,” she said. Participants range from college students to faculty members to entire families. The sprint triathlon includes a 500yard swim, 10-mile bike and 3.2-mile run. The course is flat and well-marked, and snakes through the streets of Walla Walla. Volunteer members of the swim team dot the course, ready to shout encouraging words when the bikers and runners whiz by. “[This event is] one of the most completable triathlons you can do,” said senior swim captain and veteran triathlete, Lauren Flynn. The straightforward course and fun, low-pressure framework provide a great environment for first-timers like sophomore transfer student Steven Klutho to give it a go. “I’ve never done a triathlon before, so I’m excited,” said Klutho, a former swim-

mer and cross-country runner. “I’ve heard that it’s fun, so I don’t want to miss out.” Neither does sophomore Ryan Nesbit, who competed in his first Whitman triathlon in spring 2010. “I thought, I love triathlons, I love Whitman—this has got to be cool,” he said. “I just had a ball.” Nesbit has been training in eager anticipation for the triathlon by sw imming , biking or running e ver y day.

SCOREBOARD Volleyball George Fox University 9/24 L, 3-1 Women’s soccer Pacific Lutheran 9/25 W, 3-2 Puget Sound 9/26 L, 1-0 Men’s soccer Pacific Lutheran 9/25 L, 3-0 Puget Sound 9/26 W, 3-0 Women’s tennis ITA Pacific Northwest Championship 9/27 Otto, Roberg win doubles title Men’s tennis ITA Pacific Northwest Championship 9/27 La Cava wins singles title Holton-Burke, La Cava win doubles title Men’s golf Linfield Men’s Golf Invitational 9/24 1 Linfield +12 2 Pacific +14 3 Warner Pacific +16 3 Whitman +16 5 Corban +17 6 Northwest Christian +33 7 Concordia-Portland +34 8 George Fox +45

UPCOMING EVENTS Volleyball 10/1 Linfield (Away) 10/2 Pacific (Away) 10/6 Lewis-Clark State (Away) Cross country 10/2 Charles Bowles Invitational (Willamette) Women’s soccer 10/2 Willamette (Away) 10/3 Linfield (Away) Men’s soccer 10/2 Willamette (Away) 10/3 Linfield (Away) Golf 10/3-10/4 North Idaho Golf Invi tational

Not only does competing as a team take pressure off individual athletes, but it also increases the size of the finish line cheering section, where spectators, participants and swim team organizers gather around to cheer on all of the athletes as they finish. Waiting at the finish line for them are handdesigned T-shirts, food and raffle prizes. - Lauren Flynn ‘11 In the past, athletes have walked away with gift certificates to the Colville Street E. JOHNSON Patisserie, free pizza “Why not try your hardest and see vouchers, Allegro Cyclery merchanwhat you can do?” he said. dise and even bottles of local wine. Some participants choose to gather a “[The triathlon is] just a great way to couple of friends to each do just one leg of spend a Saturday morning,” Blomme the race instead of completing the entire said. triathlon alone. Jed Schwendiman, associRegistration for the triathlon will conate to the president, “had a blast” last year tinue in Reid on Thursday, Sept. 31 and as the swimmer for a team comprised of Friday, Oct. 1 from 12-1 p.m., as well as the president’s office staff members. on the day of the race.

“It’s one of the most completable triathlons you can do.”

Monday – Martini Mondays $2 off featured Martinis

Tuesday – Happy Hour All Day Wednesday – Whiskey Wednesdays $3 McNaughton’s & $1 off all other whiskey

Thursday – College Day 64 ounces of Coors Light for $6.40 (Valid with current student id)

Friday – Lunch Special $3 wells & Coors Light Draft (11:30 – 1:30)

JACOBSON

Victory at ITA Pacific Northwest tournament

Alyssa Roberg ‘13 (above) lost a tough semifinal match on Monday, Sept. 27 against Willamette University’s top-seeded Natalia Agarycheva 2-6, 6-4, 7-6 (7-4), but teamed up with partner Elise Otto ‘11 beating Linfield’s Abby Olbrich and Sarah Click 6-3, 7-6 (7-4) to claim the doubles title.

Saturday – Breakfast All Day Breakfast Pita & Bloody Mary $9

Sunday – ½ off Featured Bottles of Wine 35 S Colville St  Walla Walla, WA

The Pioneer ISSUE 3 SEP 30, 2010 Page 8

Backpage

0,1,1,2,3, 5,8,13,21, jokes!

Clap-o-lantern Instruction Manual Here on the Backpage we know how you Whitties love energy efficiency and personal convenience, so we thought we would share a new product that we think you will just ADORE: the Clap-o-lantern. This is the instruction manual included with the one we just bought for the Pio office: Thank you for purchasing a Clap-o-lantern! The Clap-olantern is designed not only to be efficient for you by allowing you a no fuss way to turn on your light without those silly light switches, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also designed to be energy efficient. To avoid all those unnecessary and energy wasting times you unintentionally turned on or off your Clapper light, the Clap-o-lantern has devised a plan to fix that problem. SET-UP Please follow the instructions to ensure the efficiency of the product. (1) Plug in your Clap-o-lantern. (2) Clap once. (3) Clap a second time, third and fourth time, except with your hands high above your head. (4) The Clap-o-lantern will be engaged after this fourth clap, readying itself to turn on.

LOOS-DIALLO

PROMPT OPTIONS To ensure that those werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t four accidental claps, the Clap-o-lantern will respond with a prompt. Depending on the model you purchased, the prompt will vary. We feel that the variation in prompt allows the Clap-o-lantern to fit your personality: For the Cha-Cha Slide Model: Please follow the commands exactly. This time weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re gonna get funky [funky] Everybody clap your hands [everybody in the room must clap their hands] Clap clap clap clap your hands Clap clap clap clap your hands Alright we gonna do the basic steps To the left Take it back now yâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;all [everybody must take it back] One hop this time Right foot letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stomp Left foot letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stomp Cha-cha real smooth For the Fibonacci Model: Please list the Fibonacci sequence, your Clap-o-lantern will not turn on unless the sequence is correct. For the Othello Model: Please recite a 500-word response to the Othello prompt given by your Clap-o-lantern. For the Jay Leno Model: Please perform for your Clap-olantern a passable imitation of Jay Leno. For the Hot Dog Model: Please compete in a hot dog eating contest. For the Mom Model: Please call your mom and talk to her for 15 minutes; the Mom Model has a built-in timer! For the Imagination Clap-o-lantern: Please play dress up. For the Green Clap-o-lantern: Please replace all your light bulbs with energy efficient ones. After following the instructions for your model of Clapo-lantern, sit back, relax and enjoy the hassle-free glowing light of energy efficiency!

Big Sister Advice From Space Dear Josephine, Welcome to college! Mom and dad told me that Whitman is goJOH XFMM GPS ZPV TP GBS * SFBMMZ XJTI * DPVME DPNF WJTJU ZPV BOE TFF ZPVS EPSN BOE ZPVS OFX GSJFOET * NJTT ZPV TP NVDI 4QBDF JT HSFBU CVU JU T MPOFMZ * SFNFNCFS IPX * GFMU XIFO * TUBSUFE BU 4QBDF $PMMFHF BOE CPZ XBT JU UFSSJGZJOH /PU KVTU CFDBVTF PG all the new people and hard classes, but also because there is the constant fear of being struck by a meteorite or accidentally floating away from the space station when you are making some repairs to the outside and you mistakenly unhook yourself from the safety cord and float away, lost forever in space. Anyway, as your CJH TJTUFS * GFFM MJLF * TIPVME HJWF ZPV some advice! Of course, things were B MJUUMF EJÄ&#x152;FSFOU GPS NF IFSF BU 4QBDF $PMMFHF #VU * UIJOL UIBU NZ BEWJDF JT pretty â&#x20AC;&#x153;universalâ&#x20AC;? to anyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s college years. 'JSTU PÄ&#x152; CPZT /PU POMZ BSF UIFTF the best years of your life, they are your fittest years as well. After five years in space, your body is not the same shape. AT ALL. With this in mind, you should try to â&#x20AC;&#x153;blast off â&#x20AC;? with as many boys as you can while you still look like a woman. You need to establish your reputation! You need to get your name out there as one of the girls who is always down to fuck!!! )PX EP ZPV EP UIJT #F NJOEGVM PG UIF XBZ ZPV ESFTT *G ZPV XBOU UP CF B slut, you have to dress like a slut. This can be hard with the spacesuit, but

there are ways. Try wearing a denim mini skirt over your suit! Or a thong! This gets your message across while still keeping safety in mind. Man, by senior year my space suit was totally USBOTGPSNFE * HBWF JU B CFMMZCVUUPO QJFSDJOH "/% BO BOLMF UBUUPP Also, set big goals for yourself! "T UIFZ TBZ BU 4QBDF $PMMFHF BJN for the moon and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll land among the stars!!! What this means is that if there is an opportunity for you to give UIF DBQUBJO PG UIF 4QBDFCBMM 5FBN B handjob, go for it! Trust me, he will definitely spread the word about you, and with any luck youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll get your hands on the whole teamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;rocketsâ&#x20AC;?! Are you following me, Josephine? Also, you know that thing that people say about how when you go to the bathroom in space, your poop floats BXBZ #FDBVTF PG OP HSBWJUZ 5)*4 *4 " 3&"- 5)*/( 500 8BUDI PVU for those turds, Josephine. Once they have floated, they are almost impossible to catch. And this is not the type of thing you want to have associated with your reputation. Remember XIBU * TBJE BCPVU ZPVS SFQVUBUJPO +PTFQIJOF *U JT UIF NPTU JNQPSUBOU HJÄ&#x2122; that college can give you!!! 0LBZ * UIJOL UIBU T QSFUUZ NVDI BMM PG UIF JNQPSUBOU TUVÄ&#x152; * MM TFF ZPV JO Ä&#x2022;WF ZFBST (PE * MM CF UIFO 8BJU * guess that doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t take into consideration the speed we are going. Maybe * MM POMZ CF 6HIII * N HFUUJOH TP old! Love you,

Patricia

A Summary of Charges Brought Against Traitor Joe

WeeKLY c Re ePis De "The Bone-akh"

Join Wishbone as he frolics through the Garden of Eden and is confronted by that scary, SCARY snake!

OPINION

I Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Think You Appreciate Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Ask, Our Fallout Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Tell: Shelter Enough More like Hey gang! Why the MPOH GBDFT * EJEO U spend six months building this fallout shelter so you two could mope around in it! Câ&#x20AC;&#x2122;mon, think positive! Jimmy, you still like baseball, JON RICHARDS SJHIU 8FMM * CFU ZPV Dad didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t realize that with 99 percent of Americans dead from radiation poisoning, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re probably one of the top ten baseball players in the nation! * CFU ZPV OFWFS UIPVHIU ZPV E TFF UIBU EBZ come so soon, eh, champ? Haha! Jimmy? Aw câ&#x20AC;&#x2122;mon, gang, lighten up! Geez Louise, JU T MJLF * N UBLJOH B UPVS UISPVHI UIF GSPXO factoryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gift shop! Hey, Rebecca, at least you wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to hear me give the talk BOZUJNF TPPO )BIB /P TJSFF * EPO U UIJOL youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be seeing many boys other than me and Jimmy here in the foreseeable future! :FQ #PZ ZPV UXP BSF BDUJOH MJLF B DPVQMF PG bad crab apples from the crab apple barrel! 4IFFTI )FZ IPOFZ IPX BCPVU ZPV )PX ZB EPJO )FZ OPX UIBU * EPO U IBWF UP HP UP work, maybe you and me can spend a little time together, huh? Maybe get a little frisky CFIJOE UIF FNQUZ DBO QJMF /P /PU UPOJHIU * HVFTT )BIB +FTVT LJET XJMM ZPV KVTU NFMlow out? Câ&#x20AC;&#x2122;mon, at least try and have some fun! Look at all the fun stuff weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got down here! Why donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you sort the food cans into colors? Or make bracelets out of the empty cans? Haha! Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fun, right? Alright, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s JUÂ&#x2030;HP TJU JO UIF DPSOFS * N OPU CMJOE +JNNZ * DBO TFF UIBU +VTU HFU VQ BOE HP UP UIF other corner then! Christ. You people are LJMMJOH NF )BIB :PV LOPX XIBU * EPO U OFFE UP TJU JO PO DSBOLZ DMBTTÂ&#x2030;* MM KVTU HP HFU B OJDF DPPM ESJOL PG XBUFS /PX XIFSF EJE * QVU UIBU EBSO DPPMFS * LOPX * CSPVHIU JU EPXO IFSF -FU T TFF * UPPL JU PVU PG UIF house, brought it out to the shelter, set it by the tree . . . oh, shit. Oh fuck. Fuckfuckfuck. 'VDLJOH 4)*5 '6$, 0III GVDL 0III CPZ #PZ PI CPZ )BIB )FZ HBOH HBUIFS roundâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;family meeting!

canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t askâ&#x20AC;Ś wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;tâ&#x20AC;Ś. beep.

#001 #001 #&&1 #001 4PSSZ * KVTU IBE UP reboot there for a second . . . Huh. #001 i%PO U Ask Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Tellâ&#x20AC;? A Stoned Robot is a total travesty. Robots are supposed to be the IFBSUMFTT POFT 4PNFUJNFT * UIJOL UIBU NBZCF * N BDUVBMMZ B IVNBO BOE ZPV iIVNBOTw BSF UIF SFBM SPCPUT * NFBO itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like, can you ever â&#x20AC;&#x153;askâ&#x20AC;? someone XIP UIFZ SFBMMZ BSF * UPPL B QIJMPTophy class one time, at robot school, BOE * N QSFUUZ TVSF XF UBMLFE BCPVU TPNFUIJOH MJLF UIJT * N TP IVOHSZ %P XF IBWF BOZ SPCP TOBDLT #001 #001 #&&1 #&&1 "OZXBZ JU T MJLF * XBT TBZJOH * N KVTU B SPCPU BOE * EPO U IBWF GFFMJOHT PS BOZUIJOH CVU * DBO TUJMM GFFM ZPV LOPX -JLF * LOPX XIBU GFFMJOHT BSF * LOPX ZPV BMM UIJOL weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just a bunch of cold-hearted automatons bent on world domination or whatever, but the key to understanding us is knowing that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just MJLF ZPV * NFBO XF SF NBEF PG NFUBM and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re probably going to take over the world someday, but that doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t mean that we canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t . . . like . . . love PS XIBUFWFS 4P i%PO U "TL %PO U 5FMMw shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even be happening in the GJSTU QMBDF *G XF IBE i%PO U "TL %PO U Tellâ&#x20AC;? in the 60s, robots still wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be in the military. You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t ask someone JG UIFZ SF B SPCPU ZPV LOPX *U T KVTU something you know, deep down in ZPVS SPCP CPOFT #&&1 #&&1 #001 #001 * N TPSSZ * WF HPU UP HP QBTT PVU * N XBZ UPP IJHI SJHIU OPX

craigslist personals " GFX NPOUIT BÄ&#x2122;FS JUT SFNPWBM PG UIF i&SPUJD 4FSWJDFTw TFDtion, Craigslist has decided to also remove â&#x20AC;&#x153;Casual Encounters.â&#x20AC;? Many thought that this would be the end of blatant sexual propPTJUJPOT PO UIF TJUF CVU UIF #BDLQBHF IBT GPVOE B GFX QPTUT JO other sections of Craigslist worthy of an eyebrow-raise. portland craigslist > multnomah co > community > pets Happy puppy looking for a home! wiggle~~ )FMMP XPPG * BN B HSFBU %BOF MPPLJOH GPS B HSFBU EBNF UP live with!! friendly and love heavy petting!! hoping to find nice home before friday!! always up for some action at home or in the park!! hope you like licking!! i do!!! call for details (503) 555-2354 i have work from 9am to 5pm so don't call me then please any time else is fine

portland craigslist > multnomah co > community > musicians Looking for band â&#x20AC;&#x153;membersâ&#x20AC;?

-PPLJOH 'PS #BOE .FNCFST 'PS Ä&#x2021;SFF 1JFDF &OTFNCMF BMSFBEZ IBWF PXO Ä&#x2DC;VUF OFFE UXP NPSF .645 #3*/( 08/ '-65&

rsvp if okay with more than one flute in mouth at a time practice makes perfect guys!!!!!! 1PTUJOH*% portland craigslist > personals > missed connections jamba juice hottie <333

looking for some â&#x20AC;&#x153;wild gurlsâ&#x20AC;? to come to party hard at a hard QBSUZ STWQ JG JOUFSFTUFE /0 6((04 1-&"4& DBMM GPS EFFUT (503)-555-3242

jamba juice. dark hair. had hat that said jamba juice on it. asked if you worked here. you said no. bought jamba juice. went home. drank juice. thought about you while i drunk juice. started to touch myself. got phone call. stopped touching myself to answer phone. finished phone call and started to touch myself again. got on computer and looked at jamba KVJDF XFCTJUF UP TFF JG * DPVME Ä&#x2022;OE OBNF TFBSDIFE GPS iIPU HJSMw on facebook. still touching self. couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t find you. went onto craigslist. wrote ad. finished juice. finished touching self (same time).

t -PDBUJPO NZ QBOUT

send pics? y/n

1PTUJOH*%

1PTUJOH*% portland craigslist >> event calendar 4/18: Raging party

t "WPDBEPT XBZ UPP FYQFOTJWF t #BUISPPN LFZ QFSNBOFOUMZ VOBWBJMBCMF t #BE BEWJDF JO UIF Ä&#x2022;STU EFHSFF SFHBSEJOH UIF TPVOE B HPPE DBOUBloupe makes when you flick it. t 4BMFT JOGPSNBUJPO TPME UP 4PWJFU 6OJPO --â&#x20AC;&#x153;Mike Davis bought two grapefruits and a box of pasta.â&#x20AC;? --â&#x20AC;&#x153;Andrea Haddon always gets the whole-wheat bread.â&#x20AC;? t *OUFSOBUJPOBM DSJNF SJOH GPSNFE XJUI PUIFS PQFSBUJWFT JODMVEJOH but not limited to, Traitor Jose, Traitor Giotto and Traitor Ming. t 4UPSF CFMM VTFE UP EJTTFNJOBUF JMMJDJU JOGPSNBUJPO BNPOH PQFSBtives. t $BNFSBT QMBDFE JO TFMFDU QSPEVDUT BOE QBDLBHJOH JO PSEFS UP acquire information about citizens. t 4UPSF TFDVSJUZ GPPUBHF SFMFBTFE UP ,(# t /4" DPNQVUFS TZTUFN IBDLFE DPEF CSFBLJOH EBUB VTFE JO BOUJ American conspiracy. Traitor Joe in Court - Courtroom Sketch by Jonathan Taylor Thomas

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