Wildling Magazine - Volume 3 by Wildling Magazine

VOLUME 3

ÂŠ 2015 Wildling Magazine All rights reserved. No part of this magazine may be reproduced by any means without prior written consent from the publisher, except for brief portions quoted for the purpose of review, as permitted by copyright law. www.wildlingmagazine.com info@wildlingmagazine.com Instagram @wildlingmagazine Facebook facebook.com/wildlingmagazine Front Cover image by Jen Huang Back Cover image by Rebecca Lindon Inside Cover image by Joe Thompson Back Inside Cover image by Heather Whitten

CONTENTS VOLUME 3 December 2015

Contributors

Nurturing Kitchen

Editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Note

Green Smoothie

Shelling Peas

West Coast Road Trip

Tuscany, Rome & Pisa

Wrap Up

The Fairyland Trust

The Kingsize Cradle

Death And Dad

101 Life In A Day

The Lost Boys

113

Redcreek Handmade

Parenting With Presence

115

4 Years Of You

Yoga For Mindful Parents

121 Lanzarote

Dancey Pants Disco

129

Twinning Is Winning

Milk Snakes

137

Letter To My Daughter

Your Vibe Attracts Your Tribe

141 Stockists

123

CONTRIBUTORS Jen Huang www.jenhuangphoto.com Isabelle Hesselberg www.2brides.se The Fairyland Trust www.thefairylandtrust.org Anne-Marie Davies www.intolearning.co.uk Shannon MacLaggan www.shannonmaclaggan.com Emma Ross www.mamalina.co Michelle Housel www.danceypantsdisco.com Jesse Burke www.jesseburke.com Dori Varga www.tribedemama.com Jo Balfe www.nurturingkitchen.co.uk Joe & Patience www.joeandpatience.com Natalie Dybisz www.missaniela.tumblr.com Heather Whitten www.heatherwhittenphotography.com Katie Beaton www.redcreekhandmade.bigcartel.com Tim Dunk www.timdunk.com Theresa Furey www.theresafurey.com Holly Grace www.hollygraceactress.com Rebecca Lindon www.rebeccalindon.com

Image by Joe Thompson

EDITOR’S NOTE

Since launching Wildling Magazine I have shared many conversations with parents, particularly mothers, and many of the same themes have been repeated over and over again. Firstly a common thread of feeling overwhelmed with the unexpected emotion of parenthood. We are all prepared to feel tired but we don’t expect to never be able to watch the news again without experiencing harrowing dread, or crying in the bathroom because.our child’s feelings have been hurt in the playground. Secondly is the sudden thrust of creative energy that comes following birth and is intensified by long periods spent at home with a child. This often leads to the launch of a new business or creative project and we fully celebrate that here at Wildling. What is discussed less and usually with whispered tones is the loneliness, resentment and often, despression that follows the arrival of a child - it is referred to repeatedly throughout the articles in this volume. After hiding some of those feelings for a long time, I chose to confide in close friends and kindred spirits, only to discover that they have experienced them also and some still wrestle with them daily. In my own quest to face these ‘darker’ emotions I have come to accept that I must take better care of myself. As a mother, time alone often feels selfish but a few moments in the shower are not enough to secure inner calm. This is why Shannon MacLaggan’s article on conscious parenting and yoga resonates so much with me. To be kind and loving to our children, we must be kind and loving to ourselves. Stop criticising yourself and focusing on your mistakes. Instead, look in the mirror and know that you are loved and that you are doing the very best you can in this moment. You are enough.

Rebecca Lindon Editor-in-Chief

SHELLING PEAS PERSONAL ESSAY words and photography by Jen Huang

â&#x20AC;&#x153;There is nothing more fulfilling than the daily repetition of a simple routine, when it is with someone you can not bear to be without.â&#x20AC;? Unknown

As many people have said before me, there is no way to explain to anyone the mystery that is motherhood. As a first time mom, I could never have guessed what awaited me with the birth of my son. It was at once baffling and bewildering yet intense and joyful. As a photographer and business owner I am intensely passionate towards my work. I stay up late, I take on far too many projects and am very involved in the weddings and events that I cover. Along with my wedding work, I also teach workshops, shoot editorial and keep a tidy little garden behind my home. I never knew how much my life would change when a baby took up both nights and days. My son, whose nick name is Elbo, is a happy boy, but one who hates to sleep. Who knew nightly feedings would stretch into daytime fatigue. The number one thing that I changed upon becoming a mother was prioritising my time. I am a firm believer that family comes first - family is the core of my life and what drives my passion. At the same time, without my career there would be financial

hardships, so it took a while to balance work and life. I’m thankful to my son though, because I used to have a lot of trouble saying no, and now it’s impossible not to. I choose my projects very carefully which means that the projects I do work on become quite valuable. I’m finding that my work is actually getting better, and narrowing down my focus is allowing me to spend time doing the best work that I can. Elbo has also taught me to let go and take each day at a time. I’ve always been a pretty organised, fast-paced person. With a baby, I’ve learned to go with the flow. Sometimes it’s a good day and sometimes it’s not, but every day is important and the non-important tasks can always be rescheduled. It’s very freeing to have a baby remind you that you might not get to the car wash today, or tomorrow! Or that your kitchen doesn’t have to be spotless all the time. It can be messy, and cosy and loved whether it is pristine or covered in pea shells. Something like that might have bothered me in the past but it doesn’t anymore.

As a side note, I am a much better baby photographer now. I never considered things such as a nap schedule, having squeaky toys or snacks at a shoot, or even a back-up outfit! I try my best to shoot a few photographs of my son every month, and he is one of my most challenging subjects. Babies are fast movers and have minds of their own and taking photos is not their top priority. That being said, I’ve learned so much from my own son that I’ve found recent family and baby shoots to be a breeze. I’m much more prepared but at the same time, I’m much more open to letting babies and kids play in their own way and capturing them in a natural, authentic environment. My son has changed everything in my life, but he has definitely taught me to only hold on to what is most important. I cannot wait till I am teaching him more and more about the world, but I will always remember the lessons he has already taught me.

Linens by Not Perfect Linen and cutting boards by Make & Stow. Shoot inspired by the teachings and metodology of Ginny Au. Elbo wears Baby Gap.

TUSCANY, ROME & PISA TRAVEL ESSAY photography by Isabelle Hesselberg

THE FAIRYLAND TRUST LIFESTYLE ESSAY words by Abbie Panks and photography from The Fairyland Trust

An English study recently found young children in Cambridge were able to name more Pokemon characters than native animals, birds and wildflowers. Evidence also shows that children’s early experiences strongly affect their responses and attitudes to nature as adults, therefore we work with young children to give them positive early memories of nature with the hope that as they grow up, they continue to be engaged by nature. Conservation projects and nature reserves do an essential job but they rarely offer families an experience that can match time spent online, shopping, watching TV or a host of other modern past-times. Modern life is in competition with nature. It’s not so easy for parents to introduce their children to nature as it was for their parents or grandparents, or not as much as they’d like - The Fairyland Trust is here to help. Our events like The Fairy Fair and The Real Halloween, give families a great opportunity to discover nature that can compete with mainstream entertainments and the online world. Our workshops enable children to make something of their own to take home. Our unique stories draw on real natural history and authentic magical folklore of British plants and animals. Nature is good for you, we are part of it, we are living in and around it. It makes children and adults happier, calmer, healthier. Children with positive early experiences of nature are more likely to grow up wanting to care for it. For children who know the names and ways of plants and animals, nature is like a book of stories waiting to be read, just as a library is a treasure-trove of imagination. But for a child who can’t read, a library is simply a room of books, and for a child who doesn’t know nature, it’s simply ‘bugs’ and ‘green stuff’.

Think of a fairy tale and you are probably transported back into ‘nature’, and for a very good reason. Our oldest traditions, such as the ‘Holly and the Ivy’ at Christmas, our most loved myths and legends such as Robin Hood of the Greenwood, all come from a time before planes, trains and automobiles, before TV, ‘chemicals’ and plastic, from when our homes were mostly made of wood and nature was always much closer to hand. Almost all children, and many parents, are still intrigued by a good story from the world of magical folk, and much of our folklore is about the powers that our ancestors recognised in native wild plants and animals. This is why we blend nature and magic in everything we do.

Fairyland Trust events allow children to interact with nature in a magical way, for example, a child taking part in our workshops will have their imagination sparked by tales rich in folklore and natural history all whilst learning about British wildlife, nature, plant-animal interactions and the story of our landscape. Children enjoy making something special and natural, such as a Fairy Crown, Garden or a Magic Wand whilst engaging with nature and their surroundings. Our events also feature unique walkabout entertainers who interact with children and their families, live music and storytelling It is a unique combination of drama, science, arts and crafts and spectacle. By drawing on multiple senses, and using stories, this increases the power of an Our events help bring children to nature and experience which helps create positive memories, nature to children but we can’t be everywhere all so we use these principles in designing our events. the time. We want to help families enjoy nature in their own time, as their great-grandparents It is important that parents try to develop an could, when it was easy to find a flower-filled interest in the natural world at home and in meadow to picnic and play in. That is why we their immediate community,. Nature is 365 days are also raising funds to create new wildflower a year and there is always something to explore. meadows. A good start is to rediscover their own back Children who are engaged in a fun way are garden, local park or ground, talk about the much more likely to take on information and plants, insects, trees and birds they see together. our ultimate aim is to entertain and inspire the Making a fairy house or den is also a great activity next generation, making conservation fun so - using natural treasure to create a home fit for a that children grow up understanding and caring little person. Maybe make a bird feeder for their for wildlife, and knowing about our native trees outdoor space, plant some wildflowers, all of and plants. We often hear from parents that which help support the nature around them. their child has been able to identify a particular wildflower, tree or species as a direct result of one The trust operates a supporters scheme for £3 of our workshops and this is indeed the aim of a month which has various benefits including the trust. We also hear of more children enjoying a quarterly newsletter offering seasonal tips on outdoor play, such as making fairy houses or helping wildlife and fairies, what’s out in nature, dens, all of which enables them to appreciate and unique craft guides for things to make with their environment around them and foster their your children. Visit www.fairylandtrust.org. imagination.

DEATH AND DAD PERSONAL ESSAY words by Anne-Marie Davies

I’d always subscribed to the notion that the grief of losing a loved one would lessen as time went by. I guess I’d heard “time is a great healer” being bounded around too many times as a go to phrase when dealing with tragic loss.

almost acted as a right of passage for starting a family. As the reality of having children became apparent, I distinctly remember running through fake conversations in my head that I would have with my children, all of which would successfully help them join together life’s mysteries and When I lost my dad to cancer in 2012, I could worries and make them rounded and grounded, only hope that it would simply take time, and comforted and wise. that bravery, positivity and practical readjustment would see me through the unchartered waters of Yet here I was, faced with the types of question, losing this incredible man from my world. the answer to which all of my fake conversations should have well prepared me for and yet I felt As the months and subsequent years have passed, bereft of all wisdom, with no frame of reference it’s been a very different journey to any I could to work from. have imagined. As a daughter, I continue to experience moments of deep sadness, which in so My initial motivation was to reassure her that many ways intensifies as the years go by, and my death was not something that she needed to accumulation of experiences for which I am so worry about; it was far away, and when it did grateful throws into perspective just how much happen, well, it would be another adventure. he is missing - how much I am missing, not Unsurprisingly, this only served to prompt more being able to share these moments with him. As a specific questions: what happens when we die and parent, I’ve been navigating a sort of parallel grief do our eyes stay open? What does heaven look alongside my own. My children were aged 6 and like? Do we see other people in heaven? Can we 4 years when my dad died and it didn’t take long talk to them? Will I see Grandad and really, why before they began raising the types of questions does God let us die? that required answers I was scared to admit my uncertainty to. But that forced me to challenge I was brought up as a Roman Catholic and my most fundamental beliefs around life and genuinely loved being a part of the church as I death and how these could be shared with my grew up. I was a devout child and felt connected children in a way that honored the purity and to God. I never professed to understand much of beauty of their hearts and minds. what was happening within mass, but attendance at mass and being part of a faith school provided Within the first year of losing my dad, my me a certain nourishment and with that came a daughter began to express worries around dying. certainty that leading a good life would give me a I’m certain that many children will experience lot less to worry about in the after. this and whether it was for Ffion a direct result of losing her grandfather I don’t know, but it So hearing my daughter express such worries at was the first time since losing my dad that I had the same age that I was feeling so wonderfully to confront and somehow verbalize both the buoyant and hopeful of life ever after left me mechanics of and the spiritual and emotional feeling that in some way I may have failed her. Sat elements of death. by her bedside bereft of answers I asked myself why had I not taken her to church like my mum had I didn’t want to commit to having children until I taken me? Had I done so would she now have the genuinely felt I could answer all of life’s important very simple answers that comforted me as a child? questions, this was really important to me and But the answers that comforted me as a child were

not comforting me now, and I was grappling with trying to replicate for her the version of events that gave me faith as a 4 year old and the harsh reality of being 35 years old and realizing that I no longer knew what was true anymore.

was for him. It gave us the opportunity to have a good cry and a laugh, and I was able to thank Billy for his memories as many were new to me, experiences he shared with his grandad that I wasn’t even aware of.

In one such moment of strain, searching for answers to comfort a child pleading to know the truth I remembered once hearing that when a child asks a question, they are ready to know the answer. I asked myself what it was I did know. I knew that my dad had died, he was buried in the ground and over time his flesh would rot away and all that would be left was bone. His decaying body would feed the earth which would help to create life both through plants and insects and in this way, his energy would live on in the air, in the trees and in the animals he nourished.

Not too long ago, I picked Billy up from school and watched as two of his friends walked either side of him on the playground with their arms around his shoulders. He seemed visibly upset and as I approached him, his friends shared with me how he had been upset in class as they had been working on a topic that had brought back memories of Billy’s grandad. I listened as these two boys, both of which I had only ever seen shouting and rolling around, wrestling in the mud and teasing each other, suddenly telling me how they had made sure Billy was OK; sitting with him outside the classroom, giving him a hug and keeping an eye on him for the whole day. And here they were, bringing my boy to me across the playground, briefing me on what I needed to know. It was a wonderful feeling, to know that at 8 years old, my son had friends he could truly rely on to be there for him. I had the realisation that as a Mum, it’s not my job to know all the answers, and that childhood friendship can be part of the journey towards dealing with loss as much as anything.

I recall sharing this detail with her and how, as the words fell from my mouth I felt the enormity of responsibility, praying that the facts in their purest form would push aside any ambiguity and, if I’m truly honest, make the questioning stop. It wasn’t to be that easy and there were more nights she would pad in to our bedroom unsettled by thoughts of death, wrestling with why God would let anyone die. In the end, I told her: “Hon, I can’t tell you all you need to know about dying because I’ve not done it myself yet…” I stopped trying to find the answer that would reassure her and we My daughter and I haven’t moved on past the just snuggled up and held each other. nighttime hugs (who would want to?), but they tend to be more nighttime hugs without the I recall my son, a couple of years older than my questions. She may still have some, she may be daughter, around a year after my dad had died, joining the dots and finding her own answers, she becoming quite upset about missing his grandad. may be waiting until she can formulate them in to Billy had less questions around what happens in questions that make sense, or she may be waiting death and more sadness around how much he to ask someone else - her dad, my mum, my sister, missed him. Somehow this seemed easier to deal a friend in school. with, as bringing memories back to life offered an almost instant reconnection with all that was My son looks to the stars at night and decides amazing about dad. I remember Billy asking me if which one is Grandad. Sometimes we go out to it was OK to talk about grandad, he was worried the trampoline and lie in the dark and choose it may upset me. I was so grateful for his honesty the one that doesn’t sparkle too brightly, but is which gave me the opportunity to tell him how twinkling enough to let us know it’s there. I think talking about my dad was as good for me as it we have The Lion King to thank for that. 29

I’ve realised that as a mother, I don’t need to be the oracle on death, more the champion of life, the keeper of memories, ready and willing to share them because everything that was magical and unique about my dad, that which we miss terribly - his witty one liners, his love of the outdoors, his fascination with how everything ‘worked’ and how he took such pleasure in messing about with a piece of wood - this is my responsibility to keep alive. I never miss an opportunity to talk about my dad, what he would say and what he would do in a given situation. Although his physicality no longer exists and I can’t hold his hand, squeezing it to say how much I love him, and Billy and Ffion can’t nestle in to him on the couch for a story, his spirit, his essence, that which touched us all in different ways need never be diluted because the years pass by. And because of this my children will have wonderful memories, albeit coupled with their own personal quest to understand others and their own mortality. Whether they continue to look to me, the wider family, friends, books or other means for answers, will be their choosing. Death is never off limits as a topic of conversation, though it may offer no conclusions and create even more questions… As my dad would say: “It’s all part of life’s rich tapestry”.

Photographs on pages 27 and 31 by Rebecca Lindon.

THE LOST BOYS FASHION photography and styling by Rebecca Lindon, location is Happy Valley Norfolk

Fin wears top by Errandi Kids and trousers by kidscase. Frankie wears jumper by kidscase and trousers by Errandi Kids. Zeus wears jumpsuit by Nico Nico from Cissy Wears. Charlie wears jumper and scarf by Aymara.

Boots by Chapter 2 and mask by Curious Fair.

Frankie wears jumper and trouders by Le Petit Germain and feather crown by Curious Fair. Charlie wears green jumper by Fub.

Fin wears fedora by Feather Drum. Zeus wears tee and trousers by Feather Drum.

Zeus wears wool kimono by Feather Drum.

PARENTING WITH PRESENCE LIFESTYLE ESSAY words by Shannon MacLaggan and photography by Brittany Gillman Photography

Kindness arises most when I slow down. For the first few years in my parenting journey - and still on not so rare occasions - I struggled immensely with bringing presence and patience into the moments that truly mattered most with my little ones. When life stretched me further than I had ever been stretched before - sick kids, needy kids, messy house, isolation, exhaustion, depression - I would often and unwittingly transform into a person I barely recognised. Desperate, miserable, angry and resentful - the feelings would arise seemingly of their own accord and I would feel as though I was losing myself, even as my life as a Mama was becoming more meaningful and more full of love and possibility with each passing day. I was still feeling lost. This incredibly beautiful life path and journey into parenting seemed in some contrary way to be pulling me apart piece by piece, just as I was most feeling a pull to be put back together. The parallels between yoga and parenting are staggering and undeniable. Yoga is in many ways a beautiful and delicate art of dismantling. Yoga is allowing ourselves to come undone and then putting ourselves back together ~ in a more congruent and harmonious way. Sometimes we even get to choose what to take with us and what to leave behind. So Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve decided to take the principles and the lessons from my yoga practice into my parenting journey. When we allow ourselves to unravel and to fray at the edges, when we are willing to journey deep within ourselves and spend some quality time with even the parts weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d rather not acknowledge - the hurt, the anger, the frustration - then, it seems to me, we can make the most lasting and meaningful changes in our lives. I think the biggest lesson that yoga has taught me on this parenting journey is that kindness and compassion arise and flow when we slow down, quiet down and seek still on the inside. In my experience, true and lasting acceptance comes from taking the time to really see myself while being genuinely present in each and every moment. Offering myself authentic and heartfelt support and peace when I need it the most. If I can learn to offer compassion and kindness to myself, in spite of my struggles as a Mama, and maybe even because of my struggles as a Mama, then there is a beautiful possibility that I can have enough grace to offer as much if not more kindness and compassion to my children.

I am not who I once was. I have changed. I am more. Sometimes struggling, sometimes lost. And yet, always, loved, supported and celebrated. We are all growing.

Shannon MacLaggan is a yoga teacher, studio owner, life coach and mindful mama to three wild and free children, trying to live simply and with heartfelt intention on a farm in rural Ontario, Canada. You can find her at www.shannonmaclaggan.com where she helps women cultivate more peace, presence and relentless self love.

YOGA FOR MINDFUL PARENTS LIFESTYLE ESSAY words bt Shannon MacLaggan, photography by Rebecca Lindon and model Emma Ross

Restorative yoga helps us to understand, in a very embodied way, the true value of self-care. Especially as Mamas, the very best thing we can do for ourselves and for our families is to stop overextending, to stop over scheduling, to stop rushing and to start prioritising self nourishment and self care. Recharge and renew yourself by scheduling time to come home to your heart. Each posture can be held for 5 - 20 minutes. Gather all of the props that you have - bolster, pillows, blanket, blocks and eye pillow. The more supported that you feel in each pose, the more you can release and let go. Truly listen to your body in each posture, adjust accordingly, find that sweet spot that allows you to open naturally.

Take your time. No rush...

Photograph above by Brittany Gillman Photography.

Supported Bound Angle Pose Benefits: Increases blood circulation in the lower abdomen, improves digestion, stretches the inner thighs and calms the nervous system. Poses Contraindications: Knee injury / Low back pain This incredible posture allows us to feel open, free and fully supported. 1. Come to a seated position on your yoga mat with your legs straight out in front of you. 2. Bend your knees and bring the bottoms of your feet together. Gently let the knees soften open towards the floor and tucking your heels towards your pelvis. 3. Place a block or pillow underneath each thigh to fully support your legs and bring a bolster or blanket behind you, aligned with your spine so the end touches your sacrum and lay back on it. 4. Open your arms out to the sides with your palms facing up, releasing your shoulders away from your ears and snuggle your shoulder blades down your back. 5. Place an eye pillow or folded up hand towel over your eyes and allow the muscles around and behind your eyes to fully relax. 6. Take several long and deep and conscious breaths to begin to relax. 7. Give yourself some time to settle in and make any adjustments you need. Your setup should allow you to feel completely comfortable and supported, as if you are being held. 9. Stay here for up to 20 minutes.When its time to come out of the posture, support your outer thighs with your hands as you draw your legs together. Roll onto your right side and slowly sit up.

Supported Fish Pose - An incredibly vulnerable and shifting heart opening posture to get you fully feeling. Allow your heart to soften and open and stay present for each breath as it arrives. Pose Benefits:: Relieves respiratory ailments, mild backache, fatigue, anxiety and menstrual pain. Pose Contraindications: Serious low back pain / Serious neck pain 1. Come to a seated position with your legs straight out in front of you. 2. Bring a block aligned with your spine, in between your shoulder blades, be sure your buns are anchored into the mat. 3. Lay back on your block and lay your head down on another block, bolster or blanket. 4. Gently lay your arms beside you with your palms facing up, receiving towards the sky. 5. Feel your chest expand and collarbones lengthen out as you relax your shoulders down and feel a softening in your throat, jaw and mouth. 6. Adjust the posture so that it feels delicious and expansive and allow your breath to be long, smooth and deep. 7. Go to a place that is stable and secure, allowing your breath to anchor you in the present moment and set you free of any worries or anxieties that you may be holding onto. 8. Breathe fully and completely here for up to 10 minutes, experiencing everything that comes and meeting yourself exactly where you are. 9. To come out, slowly and gently slide one hand under your neck and press the head up so the chin is at the chest. Once the neck is safe and supported, slowly roll off your block to the side, remove your block and come back to laying. 10. Gently pull your knees into your chest and slowly and mindfully, begin rocking from side to side to release any residual tension or stress in your back. 47

Laying Spinal Twist - This posture is a wonderful way to decompress and rinse out any anxiety or stress you may be feeling from your day. It quickly gets you out of you rhead and into your body, allowing you to unwind and find yourself again. Pose Benefits: Stretches the back muscles and the glutes, helps to hydrate the spinal discs, lengthens, relaxes and realigns the spine, massages the abdominal organs, encourages blood flow to the digestive organs and increases health and function of entire digestive system. Pose Contraindications: Degenerative disc disease / Serious back injuries 1. Laying on your back, bend your right knee and tuck it into your chest. 2. Take your left hand to the outside of the right knee and gently bring that right knee all the way over to the left, placing it on a blanket or block. 3. Gently open your arms out to the sides and take your gaze over the right shoulder. Broaden through the chest and soften both shoulders towards the floor. 4. Lengthen out the crown of the head and keep your breath central. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t lose it. 5. Breathe awareness into the entire right side of the body ~ right hip, right side of the waist, right side of the ribcage and right shoulder. 6. Feel your body in space and get to know yourself better with each breath you take. Feel the breath, the blood, the energy. Feel it all. 7. Stay here for up to 10 minutes. 8. To release, take a big inhale to lengthen your spine and on your next exhale bring your right knee back into the chest. 9. Bring both knees into the chest and gently rock yourself back and forth. 10. Switch sides.

Legs Up The Wall Pose - My favourite restorative yoga pose. Every mama deserves to do this posture every single day. Pose Benefits: Incredibly calming for the nervous system, alleviates headaches and migraines, immense relief to the lower back, soothes menstrual cramps, boosts circulation, reduces edema in the legs and feet, relieves tired muscles in the legs and feet, relieves pain and pressure from varicose veins Pose Contraindications: Glaucoma / Hypertension / Herniated Disc 1. Come to place on the wall and bring a bolster or a large pillow. 2. Sit your buns next to the wall, and bracing yourself with your hands or forearms, gently (doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to be graceful) sweep your legs up the wall. 3. Lay yourself back on the floor or blanket, place your hands beside your ears and gently shimmy yourself towards the wall so that you legs are flush with the wall and your body is in a 90 degree position. If you have tighter hamstrings, your buns can be a bit further off the wall with your knees slightly bent. 4. From here, bend your knees and plant the bottoms of the feet into the wall. Press into the feet and lift your buns off the floor and slide a bolster under your hips, width wise. Adjust the bolster so that it is slightly away from the wall and supporting your low back and sacral area. 5. Bring the legs back up to straight and start to lengthen and create more depth with your breath. (If at any point you feel discomfort or pain in the lower back, simply lift your hips, remove the bolster and hangout in the posture with you buns on the floor.) 6. Feel the energy in your legs coming back to your heart where it belongs. Let the to do list go, let the timetable go, let the expectations go, let the rushing and blame and anxiety go and simply meet yourself in this moment. You are exactly where, who and what you need to be. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just you and your beating heart. Take up to 20 minutes here, whenever and wherever you can. 7. To come out, bend the knees, press the feet into the wall, lift your hips and slide the bolster out from under you. 8. Bring your buns back to the floor, tuck your knees into the chest for a little hug and then gently roll over the side and push yourself up to sitting.

Savasana - Corpse pose. Our chance to start fresh and put ourselves back together again. This posture represents a rebirth; leaving behind what no longer serves us and meeting the moment with a new, fresh perspective. Pose Benefits: Lowers Blood Pressure, deeply relaxes the body, reduces headaches, helps improve sleep, helps relieve mild depression, relaxes your entire central nervous system Pose Condraindications: Back injury of discomfort: bring a bolster of pillow under your knees / Pregnancy: lay with a bolster under your chest and head. 1. Come to laying on your back with your legs and arms slightly splayed out. 2. Gently tuck in your chin and tuck your tailbone to lengthen out through the spinal column. 3. Take a moment to squish your face around and then relax it completely. 4. Swallow a few times to relax the jaw, tongue and throat and let your eyes gently close. 5. Purposely bring all of your attention to your breath and feel as if you are breathing with the entire body, getting more and more relaxed and spacious with each breath you take. Notice the space. Notice the peace and possibility. Notice the clarity and contentment that comes from taking time to love and honour ourselves. 6. Savour and delight in every breath you take and feel an immense sensation of gratitude for this beautiful life. For the gifts and the giving. For the struggles too. Have gratitude for it all. 7. When you are ready, start to quietly wiggle your fingers and toes. Wiggle your wrists and ankles. Bring your arms up over your head and take a huge stretch and a glorious sigh. 8. Slowly roll over and up to seated when you are ready. Namaste Mama. 50

YOGA WITH TODDLERS LIFESTYLE ESSAY words bt Emma Ross

I was a yoga fanatic before I fell pregnant with Jack and was bent on continuing once I became a mother. As soon as Jack was a few months old, we started going to baby yoga. That got me back in my groove and once I had done my first downward dog, there was no going back, or rather standing up. I was hooked (again) and knew yoga had to be part of my life again, all the more so because I

was now a mother, and now it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just about keeping me in shape, it was about getting some time and space out and clearing my head. I soon started to notice that time was getting more and more strained and that I no longer had 40 minutes alone to do a class. And so it was, that I started self-practicing, with my toddler right alongside me.

At first it was tough but I started learning small things with each session. Here are some tips I picked up along the way for how to best self-practice with your toddler in tow:

1. Practice in the morning – you and your little one are likely to be on much better form. And if you leave it to the afternoon, you will probably find yourself putting it off. Come the evening, you’ll both be too tired to stand let alone want to pull your yoga mat out. 2. Establish a routine. Always practice in the same place and use a yoga mat. This is to signal to your little one that mummy will be practicing yoga now. 3. I knew that I didn’t want the TV or beeping plastic toys on, but a form of distraction would be essential. So as well as silent toys and books, I lay out a variety of snacks that Jack munches away on, such as raisins and apple pieces. 4. Play with the poses and try to involve your child in them as much as possible. A small kiss or tickle here and there can go a long way. Jack seems to be obsessed with my feet! That way they will see it as a bit of a game, and will start to find their own enjoyment, rather than look at your practice as boring or worse still, resent you for ignoring them. 5. Get them on board! I’ve just ordered Jack his first yoga mat – I want him to get used to having his own yoga space and of course I would love him to practice one day soon too. Whilst you’re never going to get the same out of a yoga class with your toddler beside you as you may in a quiet room, with no distractions, I assure you that you will feel energised, and exercised by the end of it. Most of all, it will be a different sort of practice; a beautiful, soul-lifting one where you connect with a little someone you love very much.

Read more from Emma at www.mamalina.co and check out her YouTube channel, www.youtube.com/mamalina. Search #toddleryogachallenge to find videos of Emma and Jack practicing yoga together.

DANCEY PANTS DISCO ARTISAN PROFILE words and photography by Michelle Housel

I went to college to study Illustration. For a few years after school I didn’t make much art, but soon after Odin was born I wanted to be the artist I always envisioned myself being. Mostly for me, but also for him too. I wanted him to see me following my dreams and hopefully he will grow up knowing that he can chase his dreams too. I started by making babywearing portaits which really took off. My Instagram audience was very small back then, but there were lots of mamas following my journey who were excited to see something like my portraits. I was so encouraged to keep moving with different projects that I loved and it has led me down a path that I am more than grateful for.

19, I made my first rag doll with an embroidered face and a felt hood like my dolls now. I made a few more dolls throughout my years there, all gifts for friends and family. The first doll that I made to list on my site and sell was only about a year ago.

I made my first rag doll when I was around 14 years old. I used a sock as the body and added legs, arms, and hair. I drew on her face and made her a little wardrobe. When I went away to college at

I can find inspiration in almost anything I think. A walk outside might be the most inspirational. I think my favorite way to get inspired is to start my morning early and away from my phone.

I hope to make a children’s book one day. I’ve been saying it for years but it’s true. I do feel like I’m slowly making my way there, but it is hard to even think about such a huge goal with things like student loans hanging over you! But I am working towards more positive productive thinking. It wasn’t always easy to be productive as a stay at home mom.

Making something yummy for breakfast and heading straight outside with Odin. Going for a walk with him is always bound to spark something as well, he tends to create the fairy-tale story or at least I see him that way. His imagination often spills over and fills mine up. The other day, we were taking a short foggy morning walk when it started to rain. He had two little mushrooms in his hands that he wanted to bring home and identify (I’m not kidding, he’s 3 and his excuse for bringing nature finds home is always so he can study them - very much inspired by an older friend who is quite the scientist). I tried to rush him along as the rain started to really pour down on us. He told me he would be nice and dry because he had his little mushroom umbrellas and then he held them up over his head, shouting “See?” I laughed and we walked at his pace the entire way back, but while we were walking I imagined that we had shrunk down to the size of the Forest Children from Elsa Beskow’s book and we were running through grass that felt like a forest, ducking under toadstools to hide from the bigger raindrops. So I think maybe he does

lots of things that lots of other children do, but I see it a little differently because my mind has always been a little trapped in this wild fairy paradise. Before Odin was born, I had been working in retail for years without making art. I wasn’t inspired and it seemed impossible to make money. Having to start paying those pesky student loans soon after graduating really made it hard to be positive about being an artist. After Odin was born, I desperately wanted to stay home with him (which his father Zak was beyond supportive about) but I felt that with my loans still coming in every month, I needed to earn money too. I felt it was unfair for Zak to have to pay my loans and it would then be impossible to save for our little homestead. So that’s the goal that I worked towards and am so giddy about it that I often worry it won’t last! It almost seems too good to be true. So, Odin really changed me completely. He inspired me to create and motivated me – so I could be with him at home and not have to send him to daycare.

The biggest challenge I think I have faced as a mother is a sense of loneliness. For a very long time after Odin was born, I would avoid my friends because I felt like my having a baby with me was a nuisance. I didn’t have other mama friends for over a year and I think it took a lot to pull out of that loneliness. I still feel lonely sometimes, but I think I’m able to snap myself out of it much quicker than before. It’s wonderful too that all of our friends love Odin and enjoy being around him and that he feels the same way about them. His entire first year we lived with four other friends, so it was six adults and little O, making him very easily attached to adults now. I think the biggest challenge now has more

to do with balancing work and parenting. Motherhood has taught me patience. I think lots of parents say that, but you don’t really realise how much patience you need until you have a little one jumping on you and asking you the same question a hundred times in a row. It has helped me in so many other parts of my life too. I’ve learned to slow down and to enjoy things that I had never noticed before. I’ve always seen a little big of magic in the world I think, but slowing down has allowed me to see full on fairy tales in the most mundane activities. I love watching Odin learn and grow and love that his growth has affected mine so visibly.

MILK SNAKES PERSONAL ESSAY words and photography by Jesse Burke

When I was a boy, I used to walk down to the pond at the end of my street and catch small, brown milk snakes. I would look under pieces of wood and rocks. They were everywhere. Bruceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pond was my favorite place to be and catching snakes was my favorite thing to do. I would often bring them home, sneaking them into my room, usually in a shoebox or jar. I would watch them slither and wonder what it would be like to be a snake, to live that life. I grew up in the suburbs, it was more urban than rural, and not the best of neighborhoods. The pond and surrounding woods was our second home, our refuge from the roughness. Those snakes were the first real connection I had to the natural world. They were intermediaries between the purity of the natural world and the harshness of reality. I can still smell the pungent odor they would nervously emit when we grabbed them. I can still feel the cold smoothness of their scales . Children are born with limitless wonder and an innate sense of discovery. Why are there clouds up there in the sky? What happens if I climb to the top of this tree? They are figuring out how the world works. As I grew older, I always retained the inquisitive nature of my youth. While in college I would venture out into the desert with my friends and explore the canyons and washes. This was the new version of my childhood pond. We would look for creatures and study them, we would swim in the streams and bask in the glory of the wilderness. We were figuring out how the world works. When my daughter, Clover, was born I felt that part of my new responsibility was

to imbue in her a deep and personal connection to the natural world. When she was old enough to endure a solid dayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s adventure we hit the road. We road-tripped around the United States looking for connection points and photographed our journeys. We were looking for undiscovered landscapes and unidentified species. We were dreaming of possibility, we were wondering limitlessly. We would drive for hours and talk about what we hoped to find or what we had seen. I would emphasize the need to look closely, to look up, and under, and to listen. I would stress the importance of engaging with the natural world. We would often hike into a location and just stop and listen. Listen to the songs of the native birds, to the whistle of the wind as it ripped through the pines, to the crash of the waves in the distance. We collected treasures and brought them back to our motels to study. One night I was coming out of the motel bathroom and she caught my eye as she peacefully lay sleeping in her bed. She looked so beautiful and exhausted. I felt compelled to just stop and watch. I sat in a shabby chair and watched as the stripes of her shirt moved up and down with every gentle breath, as her legs twitched and eyeballs rolled around. I wondered what she was dreaming of. Was she running through a field or swimming at the shore? Was she chasing bunnies? (Something we used to say the dog was doing when she would twitch in her sleep.) I just sat and watched. Before bed I took the camera out and photographed her as she slept, I could not forget this moment, it needed to be immortalized.

In the morning as soon as she awoke I asked her, as I always do, “Did you have any dreams?” She quickly said, “I was dreaming of salamanders. We were out in the woods and we were playing with them.” I just smiled and kissed her head. That day didn’t go as planned, we hadn’t made much headway and it was getting late. We decided to pull over at the next pullout and hike out into the forest. It was a last ditch effort. We found a trailhead, hiked up and down a few hills, bushwhacked through some leaves, and before long we stumbled upon a stream. I let Clover wander and explore as I sat back and looked for birds. After a few minutes I noticed that she was quiet and very busy down at the water’s edge. When I walked over to investigate I saw her squatting down collecting something in my safety orange hunting hat. I walked over to get a closer look. It was loads of salamanders. I was confused. Was I dreaming? The world felt surreal and magical in an instant. What are the chances we would drive off course, rush down the first trailhead we see, as the light was fading, and stumble upon the very situation she had dreamt of the night before? Since that day, I photograph her asleep every chance I get, in every dingy motel and every plush resort. As I do, I hold onto the idea that what I am trying to instill in her is taking hold. That she is feeling a deep sense of responsibility and love for nature and is connected to the natural world in a way that I’ll never understand. That she feels at home in the wild. Every time we spot a small snake in the woods she tries her best to catch it. Fearlessly darting into the brush. Instinctually, I cringe at the thought that it might turn and bite her, rendering her fearful and wounded. But then I flashback to Bruce’s pond and the milk snakes and the role they played in my life, and I let her dart. I let her figure out how the world works.

YOUR VIBE ATTRACTS YOUR TRIBE LIFESTYLE ESSAY words by Dori Varga and photography by Melissa Jean

Motherhood, quite surprisingly, is one of the easiest jobs I have experienced so far. My son Noah is such a mellow and easy going child that things couldn’t be any easier. His existence challenges me just enough to bring a little spice into my life. The lesson which came with pregnancy, and then motherhood, is to get rid of judgement that is left in my life, and just show pure love to all. Honoring life that flows through us and within us is something I made an important part of my life ever since carrying Noah under my heart. As I am just coming out of the first year of post partum, I am confidently saying that much has changed. I surround myself with the treasures of the earth. I never found comfort in routines, yet now I could not live without my morning ritual with Noah. I am originally an art manager with a deep interest in women fine artists, exhibition curating, and social media marketing. My passion revolving around women hasn’t changed, just the field I work within. Now I mainly focus on women who are mothers, and women who seek a loving, judgement free, spiritual community, or sisterhood. Even before my focus was more on the individual and the spiritual evolution of the artist than the actual work, so I can truly say that motherhood inspired me to find my calling.

Noah came into this world and brought so much wisdom with him. Deeply empowered by his birth, I started the TRIBE de MAMA Instagram account where we shared birth stories, inspiring images and spiritual wisdom from women all over the world, spreading the word of consciousness and oneness. Things quickly evolved and six months later we started the online magazine, and held women circles around the world. The content of the magazine is a resource for the woman who is ready to know more of the world within herself. We share articles about birth, shamanism, holistic health, astrology, and many more topics besides personal stories from motherhood and womanhood. The other big part of TRIBE de MAMA is its community building aspect. We organize gatherings, ceremonies, and workshops mainly in San Diego, but also in New Zealand, Australia, Israel, Hungary, UK, Dominican Republic and other cities within the USA.

We are a sisterhood where everyone who considers herself a woman is welcome. ‘Mama’ stands for woman and acts as a hint for the nurturing aspect living inside each of our feminine hearts on this planet. This means that you do not have to be a mother to belong to our community and be a ‘mama’. We believe that each of us is an aspect of the Goddess, and with that, we complete each I am inspired by many different things; a place, other. a tree, a conversation, a delicious meal, a piece of clothing, a song, a photograph. Being inspired The essence of our message is love, acceptance, and just depends on where I am in my spiritual equality. We all come from different backgrounds; growth, and how I am feeling in my skin. What I different families, cultures, religions, and so on, am continuously inspired by is women and their but our understanding of being a woman is journey. I adore listening to, or reading women universal. If you identify as a woman, you belong telling their life stories. Each step is so powerful. to this sisterhood. If you believe in equality, this is your tribe.

Our passion is clear and compassionate communication, celebrating diversity, and encouraging unity. We empower each other to be our most authentic selves, and to inspire each other to do so without judgment. â&#x20AC;&#x2039;Our aim is to spread the word of this mission, and reach each woman on this world. To let them know of this safe circle and to be the platform of empowerment, support and inspiration. Through our events, our goal is to create a safe village for women to come together and practice this philosophy. If I could give only one piece of advice to a woman it would be this: follow your heart. Look deep within your heart always when you seek help. You are the one who holds all the answers for yourself and your path. I have been following my heart, and deeply listening to my intuitions for years and I must say that it does not come with failures. Looking inside and facing my fears comes with a lot of work. While searching within myself, I also take time to listen and learn. I seek out and find those who hold great wisdom and have much more life experience than me. I listen to theirstories, I watch them doing their work. I admire and look up to them. I take their advice with honor and respect, then translate it into my own language, listening to what my heart tells me. I always remind myself to stay open to anything the world and the universe has to teach me. This can come from my beloved ones, through an e-mail landing in my inbox, from a plant, or whispered by the wind during a nice walk on the beach. Just always listening and learningâ&#x20AC;&#x2039;.

i m a g e : t a k e a p i c t u re l a d y. co m

Amy & Ivor

amyandivor.com

NURTURING KITCHEN ARTISAN PROFILE words and photography by Jo Balfe

Food and nature have been my biggest inspirations for as long as I can remember. I remember sitting on my mothers knee rolling pastry and shelling beans, and spending most of my childhood exploring the wonders of the outdoors and helping my father in our garden. Now that I have children of my own, they provide me with my biggest inspiration of all. From watching them observe nature’s wonder and having the privilege of feeding them every single day, I know I have reached my greatest purpose in life to nourish and sustain our growing family from the gifts of mother nature. The recipes I have created over the years are now made with one or both of my girls at my side or on my hip, and have been adapted to satisfy the likes and needs of our active and growing family. From a baby’s first solid foods, toddler-friendly family meals and hearty feasts to nourish and replenish physically active parents, all of the meals I make are simple, adaptable and packed full of plant based nutrition, inspired by the seasons and what is growing around us. Though all of these factors never mean that taste is compromised. Feeding all of our senses through delicious, colourful vibrant foods is what we love best. My passion for wholesome food and inspiration from mother nature is something I can always recall being with me. ‘Growing our own’ was something we grew up doing - my Dad taking care of our garden and harvesting fresh fruits and vegetables throughout the seasons. My mother became vegetarian when I was quite little and I immediately followed suit, feeling very early on that harming animals was not something I wanted to contribute to in my life. She would always make us home-cooked food, and although my methods have changed somewhat from the

dishes she would serve us, the essence remains the same - nurturing our family bond through real, wholesome food made with love. As a mother now myself, nurturing my family is something which comes naturally and I aim to infuse in everything we do. From tending our garden, foraging in the woods, adventuring in nature or the creating of plant based feasts, working with mother nature brings out the best parts of me and is where the magical memories are formed. Growing up we ate home cooked, often home grown mainly vegetarian food, including lots of cheese and eggs and some fish. It also included plenty of home made puddings which my mother and I would make together. She was always health conscious but sugar played a big part in our everyday meals, and I always had a sweet tooth. When I was in my late teens I developed chronic acne and hormonal problems, and was prescribed antibiotics and pills which caused all kinds of imbalance in my body. I began looking into alternative medicine at this time and especially diet; taking my self off my prescribed drugs and cutting out all sugar and dairy products from my diet. After some initial detox, my skin healed itself completely and I had energy that I had not experienced in a long time. My digestion improved, my eyes became brighter, my skin glowed and I became very inspired by the vegan lifestyle. Over the next few years I tried different diets, always experimenting with my health but it wasn’t until a few years ago that I became vegan for environmental and ethical reasons. Making this switch made me much more grounded in my diet, eating in a way which is kind to the earth as well as my body brings me so much peace and I feel so inspired by this lifestyle every day.

Eating a wholefoods, plant based diet feels so instinctive to me and makes me really happy! I love eating this way and I get excited by simple things like the first asparagus of the seasonal, eating bowls full of strawberries in summer, the vast varieties of winter squashes and getting creative with what nature gifts us. Knowing that our food choices cause little harm to the environment and are sustainable for our future generations makes me feel incredibly at peace with what we choose to eat. The feel-good factor of eating for the greater good brings about a vitality of its own. When I’m eating locally grown fruits and vegetables I feel good knowing that they haven’t had to travel half way around the world to my plate. When we eat in tune with the seasons, I feel a connection to nature and its cycles and that brings about a deep sense of gratitude. I thrive on eating an abundance of plant based foods, no restriction or guilt.

to me to give them everything they needed. It was a fast track to selfless living and I started worrying less about the ‘perfectness’ of what I was eating and more about the experience of eating as a family. Before having children I would often rush out of the door in the mornings with a smoothie without sitting down to share a homemade meal with my loved ones. Now we always make time to eat breakfast and supper together as a family, and I have to make sure everyone is satisfied from the baby to the active toddler, physical man and me, the mother who needs to have the energy to care for everyone’s needs. This means I now make meals which are simple but have lots of added extras so everyone can tailor it to suit their likes and needs. Breakfasts can be bulked up with lots of fresh fruits, seeds, smoothies and superfoods whilst suppers often consist of a one-pot meal with a fresh salad, bread, spreads and toppings. We always aim to make meal times a time of family bonding. I value the making of food so Becoming a mother changed me in ways I never much more too, teaching my children as I stir imagined. No longer was I responsible only for and bake, and my two year old loves to help in keeping myself nourished and healthy, but the tiny any way that she can. humans I’d birthed into the world who looked up

I definitely recommend focusing on simple changes if anyone is trying to make their diets healthier, rather than focusing on cutting things out. Adding delicious home made smoothies to your breakfast meal, trying out vegan ‘fast-foods’ such as falafels and pizza and making healthy sweet treats are all ways that you can eat healthy food without feeling deprived of what you love. Once you start adding in delicious foods the unhealthier stuff naturally becomes less appealing. However my top three tips would be: 1. To eat more greens by making a green smoothie every morning. My girls love them and you can pack a huge serving of leafy greens into one smoothie and it tastes like you’re drinking a sweet creamy smoothie if you add frozen bananas. 2. Start making your own ‘milk’ by blending nuts, seeds or oats with water and straining it to make delicious plant based milk. You can add maple syrup or dates to make it sweeter and it tastes so good on cereals, porridge or made into milkshakes. We love making sesame seed and oat milks at the moment. 3. Switch to healthier sugars by getting to know how to use dates and fruit in place of refined sugar in baking. Cutting out white sugar and replacing it is one of the best things you can do for your health, and using whole fruits which still have all of the fibre and minerals needed to process the natural sugar is the best way to add sweetness to cakes and desserts. It takes a bit of trial and error to know how to use them right, but once you get used to it your palette will change to appreciate the natural taste of sugar. Lastly it would be to make your food fun, don’t worry about doing everything perfectly and learn to love plant based meals and cooking with the seasons. Changing our meals like the seasons is something I particularly love, and eating in season not only tastes better, it makes meal planning more exciting and is better for the environment.

GREEN SMOOTHIE RECIPE words by Jo Balfe and photography by Benjamin Mathers

INGREDIENTS 1 large ripe (spotty) banana, peeled and frozen 1/2 avocado 1 cup coconut water / plant based milk / apple juice or water 1 handful leafy greens (spinach, kale, romaine, chard) 1 small bunch herby greens (mint leaves, parsley, lemon balm, nettle) 1 tbsp shelled hemp seeds (optional)

METHOD 1. Freeze the bananas for at least 4 hours before making (we always buy bananas when theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re really ripe, peel and freeze them to stock the freezer). 2. Add all ingredients to an upright blender and blend until smooth and creamy. 3. Pour into a tall glass or divide between glasses and enjoy.

* Can be spoon-fed to babies from around 7 months.

WEST COAST ROAD TRIP TRAVEL ESSAY words by Joe Thompson and photographyby Joe and Patience Thompson

What started out as a plan to fly to Arizona from our home in Washington to photograph a wedding and fly straight back home, turned into one of the most defining trips of our young family’s life. We decided to spend 3 weeks on the road with our kids Noah and Abbee who, at ages 4 and 6, aren’t exactly the type to sit still and be patient while driving for hours and hours across the

vast western United States. We hope that our experience during this trip, a trip where we somehow kept our kids occupied, excited and most importantly, movie free, encourages you to take the chance of going on a trip of your own that you didn’t think was possible. The following ideas are things that we used to keep Noah and Abbee involved and enhanced our time as a family while driving through Washington, Oregon, California, Nevada, Arizona and Mexico.

The first and most important part of our plan was to map things out but not in an adult kind of way. We decided to make a list of playgrounds and parks along our route to keep them excited about continuing on for the day. While it would have been easy for us to drive for 10-12 hours each day in order to make good time, we decided to try and keep each day of driving closer to 6 hours with stops at those parks and playgrounds close to 2 hours apart.

right after Abbee started first grade and she was going to miss important school time. An issue we were concerned about actually turned into a really awesome project for Abbee and one of the things that occupied both of our kids during some of the long stretches of driving. As a part of her homework, Abbeeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s teacher assigned her the project of keeping a journal of our trip. Following every stop we asked her what her favorite part of that specific place was so she could draw and write about it. We also wanted to make sure Noah was These stops were also great for us because we included as much as possible so we brought along were able to document something that will bring extra paper for him. back great memories of the trip for our kids. We decided to take photos at each and every stop no The best part of this trip was being able to spend matter how small the playground or how desolate time as a family with almost no distractions. As the park. These photos, along with some historical business owners this is something that has been landmarks, are what became the beginning of hard to find in our daily lives. This trip really gave our Playground Project. Due to this trip being us chance to spend quality time with our kids and planned around a wedding, the timing was out get to know them even better, while experiencing of our control. It ended up being planned for really amazing places together as a family.

WRAP UP FASHION photography by Rebecca Lindon

Orielly wears blouse by Poudre Organic and blanket by FloraFairweather.

Orielly and Boudie wear blankets, hats and scarves by FloraFairweather.

Blankets by Zilalila.

Grey blanket by Repose Ams and pyjamas by Cambridge Baby.

Eve wears pyjamas by Willa and the Bear. Blanket also by Willa & The Bear.

THE KING-SIZE CRADLE LIFESTYLE ESSAY words and photography by Natalie Dybisz

It’s 2am. I have awoken, my mind switching on suddenly like a page in a pop-up book. I look across to my 5-month old daughter asleep between us in our big bed, taking a few moments to admire her peaceful face just moments before she rummages, and a familiar grunt starts. I let down an arm of my top, scoop and position her to one side, her eyes still closed but just conscious enough to now let out a little cry that half-wakes her daddy to a stir. Hurrying to catch her latch I lay down and the milk flows, she is content again, all of us drifting back into sleep light enough to remain safely aware of each other, deep enough to refresh us. Her mouth will later fall off me until her stomach stirs her again, and the process repeats 2 or 3 times until morning, when we will awake and enjoy her morning grins, change her sodden nappy and start the day. I, feeling curiously as well rested as I ever was pre-baby, will be unsure exactly of how many times I was even awake.

and basically turn our lives upside down. The question is on everyone’s lips: ‘does he/she sleep through the night, is he/she good?’ implying that we have, or should have, one main desire: for baby to sleep long, independently as soon as possible, on a ‘bedtime routine’ to healthily wire them to the ways of our world.

But what if those expectations of babies are wrong? What if our conventions and customs are at odds with the makeup babies have come wired with since the Stone Age? Traditional cultures present today, from the Ganda of Uganda to the Maori of New Zealand; Walmadjeri Aborigines of Australia, Eskimos, the Balinese and parents throughout Africa and Asia all sleep with their babies. Co-sleeping is an ancient art, and once universal. It was only since the nineteenth century that the developed West began separating the child at night, and whilst the rest of the world carried on co-sleeping, our normalised reality of the cot and nursery became the one we know Can this image of a new parent’s night be real? now. It sounds like a fantasy. But this is what life is like for us as co-sleeping parents. In fact the I first discovered co-sleeping from books. In nights have so far proved the easiest and most the same way I learned one does not need a predictable time, leaving the daytime to provide hospital for normal birth, a bottle to feed, or most of our new-parent challenges. We feel like jars of purees to wean, I began to think the we have somehow cheated the usual fate, and cot was madness. It was Deborah Jackson’s wonder for how long it will be this easy. Are we ‘Three in a Bed’ that sealed the deal for how I just lucky, is our child a fluke? Or has co-sleeping planned to sleep when my child arrived, from itself carved this fate, sealed it with our relaxed the first page, where Jackson describes sleeping attitude to placing her on our adult mattress the with her new baby on the unforgettable night very night of her birth? That time-old image of of her birth, in an exciting rebellion against the new parents driven to the border of insanity by advice of the hospital midwife. Yet it was clear sleeplessness is so far driven into our culture, to me that her rebellion was backed by instinct, that most people cannot imagine anything not irresponsibility. I knew that when I held different. Surely we all know that babies cry too my own baby fresh in my arms; vulnerable, much, want feeding through the night when squirming for the breast, unable to regulate her they shouldn’t, won’t go to sleep, keep us awake, own temperature, my instinct would be to hold 97

her close all through the deep dark night. To me, there was no safer cradle than our bed, hugged to my heartbeat and the rhythm of my breath. After initially nightfeeding in the typical ‘cradle hold’ across my upheld arms, my midwife soon showed me the side-laying position, which became in literal terms a recovery position, then every night become a sleeping ‘dreamfeed’. Six months of dreamfeeding later, bedsharing has exceeded my expectations, and we have a child who many people remark is unusually calm and alert.

So of course I wonder, and want to shout from the rooftops, why don’t more of us co-sleep and have nights just as easy? Unfortunately our general cultural view is that co-sleeping is at best an indulgent bad habit, and at worst, a danger. Or at the most, an unintended consequence against our learned principles, something we ‘give in’ to when the baby becomes a toddler and climbs into the parent bed. For a small baby, we must talk of co-sleeping in terms of guidelines, doing it ‘safely’, in the same language for flying on a passenger jet or abseiling a mountain.

The bigger picture becomes apparent as soon as we put down our everyday cultural lens, and have a glimpse through another. Just as we might look to another culture with low cancer rates or teeth that never get cavities, we should look at the parental ‘diets’ of those who bedshare as the norm and do not know the same problems we do. “I am going to Japan tomorrow. There, they sleep with their babies and have never heard of cot death. How can I go to them and say, ‘Do not sleep with your babies.’ They will think I am crazy.” (Health researcher Michel Odent whispering to childcare author Deborah Jackson at a press conference on SIDS in 1991, where New Zealand researchers claimed that cosleeping could lead to cot death) The biggest lifestyle difference is the way we feed our babies, for we are not the same as Japan. For co-sleeping to be fundamentally safe, the mother should be breastfeeding, but we live in a dominantly bottle-feeding culture. According to the infant survey last done in 2010 by the NHS Information Centre, the cross-UK average of women exclusively breastfeeding at 6 weeks is only 19%. This implies that they are formulafeeding, which introduces a different set of factors. There is fascinating science in the synchronicity of breastfeeding mother and child sleeping in close proximity. Both do not enter the deepest stage of sleep, in harmony with a habit evolved over millennia (within the family bed the father, too, can find himself adapted to a lighter sleep). The co-sleeping baby takes in up to 3 times as much milk than if they sleep alone. Contrary to the expectation of our monophasic ideal (‘sleeping through’), a healthy thriving baby should wake regularly to feed, and it is at night when a young baby takes in half of all its milk. Far from being something to resent, it is something we do better to embrace. The mother’s body was prepared in

late pregnancy for night wakings. Mother and baby are two parts of a finely-tuned machine, connected beyond pregnancy through the mother’s milk, which even adapts its antibodies and water content from information received through the baby’s saliva. Co-sleeping greatly helps this relationship and benefits them both: breastmilk contains melatonin at night to help baby sleep, whilst round-the-clock feeding eases congestion in the mother’s milk ducts and helps suppress her periods. And, simply, they both sleep, they both feed, and they do so without the friction and tension of a forced, upright nightly state of awakeness to feed, exhausting in the long-term, especially in our busy modern working lives. ‘Breastsleeping’ is stunningly winwin. To take breastfeeding out of the co-sleeping picture, however, is to invite the unknown. A baby’s digestion, habits and cues are different with formula milk, inducing deeper and longer sleep. Still, having the baby close to the parents’ bed in a sidecar attached cot, would mean responding to the baby’s hunger when expressed by their first rousing, easier to console than if the cries are first heard at their loudest from another room. To ask why breastfeeding is in the minority is to raise other questions: about the medicalisation of birth, the education and support offered to breastfeeding, and our attitudes to the female body. To further answer why co-sleeping is uncommon is partly to recognise our cultural tendency to make parenting into a battleground, a war waged to ‘get our lives back’. There is also the mainstream media’s disinformation on cosleeping, which instills fear and further distances us from following our instincts. And, the nursery is so deeply entrenched into our ideology, that many people simply desire nighttime separation and choose that with free will.

Even if we accept co-sleeping is safe, a common view is that ‘letting’ a child into bed with us will disrupt the adults’ sex life, and rear a clingy child. Whilst co-sleepers will respond to the sex life issue in numerous ways, the issue of clinginess is ironic, as self-reliance is best learned from a position of security. Co-sleepers profess that meeting a child’s need for dependency early in life nurtures their independence, forging the trust to respond on their own cue and confidently choose their own time to separate from the family bed. Although bedsharing is not for everyone, there are other aspects of attachment parenting to help bond and develop that same sense of loving stability.

knees on colder nights) and pillows away from her head, usually protected by the barrier of my arm making a ‘C’ shape round her. They say to keep baby on mother’s side, but we have her in the middle too, as my partner has proven his awareness. I always like a night-long light, but filter it red to avoid disrupting sleep hormones. Himalayan salt lamps work well.

Suffice to say that the increasingly wriggling little limbs or occasionally waking up in a wet patch don’t deter my intrinsic belief in the overall ideology of our nocturnal lifestyle choice and the sense it makes. I hope those parents whose instinct is to co-sleep, can tune into and trust that instinct. A family snuggling up in their Some pointers? You shouldn’t bedshare after sleeping space is normal and beautiful, and an heavy drinking or if either parent smokes. opportunity for loving and mindful living. Always sleep on a firm mattress and never a sofa. Keep long hair tied up, and baby under their For further reading and enlightening baby own blanket, not swaddled. Your body heat anthropology beyond my own scope, I will mean baby can dress lighter. We continue recommend Deborah Jackson’s ‘Baby Wisdom’ to use a duvet, kept low (or just over baby’s and ‘Three in a Bed’.

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LIFE IN A DAY PHOTOGRAPHY ESSAY photography by Heather Whitten

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HANDMADE MINI-RAG DOLLS AND FURNITURE WWW.LITTLEFLEURIE.COM FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM @LITTLEFLEURIE

online kidswear and gifts shop for 1-7 year olds

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REDCREEK HANDMADE ARTISAN PROFILE words and photography by Katie Beaton

I have always worked in hospitality but have always done creative work on the side. I’ve always sewn - making quilts and household items, I started making clothing for my daughter June shortly after she was born. I launched Redcreek Handmade around 2 years ago. I currently create full time and it’s wonderful. I really wanted to create a gender neutral brand for parents. I love linen and I wanted to use it exclusively, in solids. I believe it’s a wonder fibre! It’s so cosy, warm, tough and breathable. It is also important to me to offer a product that is made sustainably, with which the materials are sourced carefully and with ethical practices in mind. I’ve worked hard to achieve these standards. I cut, sew, press and pack every piece that comes out of the studio. It means a lot to me to send a carefully constructed and inspected piece to my customers, they are the best! I want my pieces to last and be passed down and around. I think I’m making that happen. I’m inspired by nature, simple lines, color, layers, June. I draw inspiration from so many things. A new piece usually comes to me late at night. June is my number one inspiration, she’s the reason this all exists. When she was first born, I was finding it difficult to find simple clothing... and the rest is history. I’ve had the most success of my life since I had June. It’s quite amazing. The period in life when time is the most precious seems to keep some folks the most focused. No-one could have told me how hard motherhood could be. I think the whole job is challenging, especially being a first-time mom. There is just so much to do, so much to give, so much to love. It took me some time to get used to it, but it’s been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Motherhood has taught me to take your time, feel everything, love fully, enjoy your children. Time is fleeting. I’ve also learned that finding something you love to do is so important and rewarding.

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4 YEARS OF YOU PHOTOGRAPHY ESSAY photography by Tim Dunk

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LANZAROTE TRAVEL ESSAY words and photography by Theresa Furey

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With the Winter closing in fast, I find myself daydreaming more and more about our summer vacation. Immediately my thoughts go to the gorgeous family trip to Lanzarote. Lanzarote, the land of ochre, lava, sun, sea, sand and sweet wine. Where can you go wrong?

de los Verdes and Jameos del Agua. Cueva de los Verdes formation was from its former state as a lava tube. The cave lies within the protected Monumento Natural del Malpaís de La Corona. Jameos del Agua is also a magical place and is specifically named for its most famous inhabitants, the “jameitos” or the blind albino My family and I spent seven heavenly days there. crabs that live on the floor of the lake inside the We stayed predominately in Playa Blanco at the volcanic grotto. all inclusive Flamingo Resort. Playa Blanco is the ultimate spot for sun worshipers and a great For those who want more culture there is the place to scuba dive for those seeking some gorgeous ‘old capital’ of Teguise. Every Sunday adventure. During our stay we really wanted to they hold an open market with over 200 vendors take in more of the island than just the resort. It including local artists with unique carvings, was important for us to seek out some culture to paintings, drawings and crafts. Some of the keep us adults happy but also ensure whatever vendors travel from the other Canary Islands and we did was not going to leave the boys begging even a few from the west coast of Africa. There to get back to the hotel pool. were plenty of fabulous restaurants in town to eat or get a cafe, but to keep the kids happy and Our first venture out was to La Corona National balance out our cultural intake we spent some Park, specifically at the wondrous caves of Cueva time at the city centre ‘petting zoo’, taking donkey rides.

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On our last tour we headed out to Timanfaya National Park, to tour the the volcanoes on the path laid out by architect César Manrique. We witnessed not only the awesome size but their colours, flora, heat and activity. The volcano heat at the visitor centre does most of the cooking for its adjoined restaurant. As we witnessed this event I also couldn’t help but notice it was cooking us too! We only spent a brief time watching the food naturally BBQ before we moved on. The volcanoes have given a rich life to Lanzarote, despite what most think. The volcanic ash makes for rich soil and this soil is absolutely ideal for growing the beautiful sweet grapes that make the Moscatel wine the island is so well known for. It’s well worth your time to take a trip to a few bodegas and enjoy the finer tastes of Lanzarote.

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Other hot spots we visited on our trip were the Lanzaloe Farm to find out how aloe plants are grown and cultivated in aloe vera. We learned the plant is a member of the onion family, that there is a proper way to cut the plant to extract the useful aloe and which sections of the plant will leave you running for the toilet. I never knew that about aloe and I certainly was glad I haven’t found out the hard way. The boys were both taught how to plant a young aloe and we’re given those plants to take as a souvenir. Believe it or not we still have them growing and thriving in our home on the ledge of our kitchen window. They have come in very handy with all the cuts and scratches the boys get! Our whole experience was amazing and we talk about it quite frequently with such wonderful memories. It is definitely a family holiday we would not mind repeating and I can’t recommend it enough.

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TWINNING IS WINNING FASHION photography by Rebecca Lindon

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Katy and Annie from Happy Valley Norfolk wear tees by Nor_Folk.

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Rachel and Lili from The Firepit Camp wear tops by Kids On The Moon

Rebecca and Zeus wears jumpers by babaa knitwear.

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Ben and Frankie wear pyjamas by The Bright Company at Happy Valley Norfolk.

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LETTER TO MY DAUGHTER PERSONAL ESSAY words by Holly Grace

Dear Frankie, I was born creative. It’s in my blood. I was born to be expressive through my creativity. While some call it a gift, I’ve privately wrestled with it my whole life. I don’t feel things on an average scale. Not like the others. I feel things at 200%. It’s the best and the worst of things.

My feelings dragged me in and out of my therapist’s chair. With slumped shoulders, my head in my hands and between broken sobs I’ve cried “I feel too much...and I have no idea how to make it stop.” I’ve said it to a very select few (certain that I’m crazy), only to work out why my heart was made twelve sizes too big for my chest.

My earliest memory is when I was four years old crying to my mama because “I feel mama. I just During the nine months I carried you, I worried feel too much.” that I was turning you into me. I worried that I was teaching you how to feel things so strongly My feelings took me to drama school when I was that your world would stop spinning. I worried nineteen years old and what followed were the that one day you too would know what that hardest years of my life. I was stripped down and bathroom floor felt like under your clammy scratched out. I tore myself open in the pursuit hands and heavy heart. I didn’t want to pass this of excellence. My identity was wrapped up inside curse onto you. the ability to feel a character’s emotion so strongly that I became unrecognisable to the audience The moment you were born and placed on (and on some nights even myself ). When that my chest, your grandma and your dad started character was heartbroken, my heart broke too. inspecting you. They looked to see if you had When she was happy, I was skipping on the shine the same webbed toes as he, or the same curly of the stars above me. My ability to flick between mane as me. Yet in all the commotion and the emotions with lightening speed became the drug “oohing” and “ahhing,” I was searching for the I chased. I longed to feel...and yet I hated it. As I deepest part of me and trying to find any sign said; it was the best and the worst of things. that it also resided in you. When you looked up at me and held my gaze, it was then that I saw it. When I left university and started acting And I broke in two. professionally, suddenly I was being paid to do the very thing I’d been doing for as long as I You’re now four months old and whenever a sad could remember.. As I grew, my feelings pushed song comes on the radio, you cry. A silent weep me onto my bathroom floor in Brisbane; sobbing with tears streaming down your face. My darling my heart out with pieces of glass scattered on the girl, I often find you staring off into the distance tiles around me. and I wonder if you’ve been here on this earth before. You with your furrowed brow as your eyes My feelings threw me to London; running search mine for the answers. I’ve found that the through the concrete jungle with my dreams only thing that soothes you is the sound of my tucked away in my back pocket. Desperate to song. A song you listened to as you curled up make a living with my art. underneath my heartbeat. 137

I was crying these tears to your papa the other day. He held my hand, smiled and said “Darl, don’t you get it? You’re the one who showed me how to feel. I was a stone when I met you and you pried me open and loved me into speaking.” I realised that it is my ability to feel - as deeply as I do - that did that for him. When he shared with me his stories of heartbreak, I hurt for him. When we sat outside the ice cream shop and he told me the thing he’s most ashamed of, I cried for him and felt his shame. Then I wrapped it all up inside of me and locked it away. To feel his pain like that helped me understand my own. I hope with all I have that you’ll learn that the

world is a beautiful place, Frankie. It’s taken me a while to realise this, but I’m grateful you have the ability to feel so deeply. It is our very own beautiful secret. It will keep you in good stead. When you’re alone it WILL feel excruciating and if your heart breaks it WILL just about tear you in two, but through it all, or rather in spite of it all, you’ll feel alive. Maybe one day you’ll write your feelings out into songs, or pour them onto a stage. Or spill them out into the soil of your garden, or from the ink of your pen. The best part is, you can help others with the depth you were born with. Maybe you too will feel so deeply that you’ll be able to love someone into speaking.

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If the day comes when you cry to me saying “I just feel, mama. I feel too much,” I’ll take your hand and lead you out to the garden. We’ll sit amongst the flowers and I’ll teach you how to close your eyes and put your hands in the soil. Plant your feet in the ground. Place your hand on your big heart and feel it beat. Thank God for life and for every colour it brings: all of the grief and all of the joy. This morning when I entered your room, I peered over your crib and I stood in a position where you couldn’t see me. I watched you. In a matter of seconds you laughed, you cried and then your left hand found your right and you held onto it. As you lay there, holding your own hand, your gaze fixed onto the ceiling and you started singing. I looked on as you threw your whole body into your morning song. Your eyes were wide and your face shone with the flicker of a million emotions. I’ve never been prouder. I’m so so so blessed to walk this life with you and teach you how to harness your feelings and gallop along for the ride. It is a beautiful life, Frankie. Some days it’s the worst of things, but for the most part (the most glorious part) it’s the best. I love you. Forever.

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