THE MAGAZINE October 2019 Issue 25
BREAST CANCER AWARENESS
BREAST CANCER Prevention, Risk, & Navigation
PINK FRIDAY PARTY REVIEW
HELEN RUSSELL
BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR
SWEETEST DAY
Third Saturday in October
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE’S
5th Annual Empowerment Conference Review
more inside…
Together, we have the strength.
Education
MCADV provides training sessions, special events and resource materials to all sectors of the community, including law enforcement, professional, civic groups, and services providers.
Public Awareness
MCADV conducts ongoing statewide media campaigns aimed at specific target audiences including action-oriented communications to victims and the public as well as building public awareness about domestic violence in various entities within the community at-large.
Technical Assistance
MCADV provides training, support, resources, and capacity building to member shelter programs and coordinates efforts between programs and other community service agencies to enhance the strategies and programs for victim service provision as well as provide referrals to domestic violence shelter programs and other available services.
Resource Distribution
MCADV maintains information on domestic violence resources and services including stalking, teen dating violence, domestic violence and the faith community, victims’ rights, and elder abuse.
Legal Services
MCADV conducts the coordination of legal services to victims of interpersonal violence associated with the shelter programs, such as family law matters and other non-tort legal services in civil court matters.
2
1-800-898-3234 SUPPORT@MCADV.ORG MCADV.ORG
MARSHA HOLLINS ADAMS | Owner/Agent
“Strategic Life Planning With A Personal Touch.” JACKSON: 1700 University Blvd., Suite 7, Jackson, MS 39209 • 769.251.5212 SATELLITE OFFICE: 821 Summit Street, McComb, MS 39648 • 601.324.3185
Health and Medical Ins. Plans, Medicare Advantage & More
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
3
4
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Willie Jones President & CEO
DEPENDABLE SOURCE CORP. OF MS
Where Driver Needs Are A Priority Dependable Source Corp. of MS is a provider of driver workforce solutions to the transportation Industry. We provide experienced, professional and DOT certified commercial drivers to maufacturers, distributors and motor carriers throughout the South. Launched in 1995, Dependable Source Corp. of Mississippi is a respected leader in the transportation industry and is considered one of the best in the commercial trucking field.
REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE SOMEONE YOU COULD COUNT ON?
INDUSTRIAL/WAREHOUSE STAFFING
GOOD PEOPLE - Where you need them, when you need them. Whatever the need, let DEPENDABLE SOURCE be YOUR SOURCE FOR ALL OF YOUR INDUSTRIAL/WAREHOUSE STAFFING NEEDS. • Assemblers • Warehouse Personnel • Shipping/Receiving • Packaging,Stocking • Logistics Personnel/General Labor
www.dependablesourcecorp.com
WOMAN TO |WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE Call us today on 601-355-3889 Email: admin@dependablesourcecorp.com
5
Joanne’s Desk
CEO, Publisher & Editor Joanne Bell Wright
Contributing Writers
Salmeilia Stewart Dr. LaFarra Young
Layout Design
Mohammad Alauddin
Cover Photographer Mya Bell
Website
womantowomanwithjoanne.com
Subscribe
bit.ly/joannebellmag
Contact us
601-398-6733 woman2woman.joanne@yahoo.com 622 Duling Avenue Jackson MS 39216
Contributing writers
BY JOANNE BELL WRIGHT, FOUNDER
F
or the month of October, we focus on Breast Cancer Awareness and Domestic Violence Awareness. Even though this month is set aside for these causes and issues, both are happening on a daily basis and require or prayers and attention. As we all know, domestic abuse is not only physical, but emotional, verbal and mental. It’s even spiritual, and my prayer is that God will give any victim the wisdom, courage, and grace to know when to get out of a bad situation.
This month has so many other things that we should be aware of and I pray that we are just aware in life period. Be aware of others around you that may need your smile today, they may need your “Good Morning” or a sincere “how are you” where you actually stop to listen to their response. A quote that I think applies to us all is, “In a world where you can be anything you want to be, BE KIND.” Love ya much! Joanne
As we focus on Breast Cancer Awareness, I pray that every woman affected by this disease is comforted in knowing that they are not alone and that reaching out for help is a great thing to do. Surround yourself with women who understand what you are going through and can walk with you through your journey.
Love ya much!
Joanne
In This Issue Salmeilia Stewart
Dr. LaFarra Young
All rights reserved. No portion of Woman to Woman with Joanne may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. The management of Woman to Woman with Joanne is not responsible for opinions expressed by its writers. Woman to Woman with Joanne maintains the unrestricted right to edit or refuse all submitted material. All advertisements are subject to approval by the publisher. The production of Woman to Woman is funded by advertising and sponsorship.
6
Breast Cancer – Navigating Successfully .................................................................. 8 Mya Bell’s Abstract Photos ........................................................................................ 12 Evaluate Your Life Day ............................................................................................... 14 Make A Difference Day ............................................................................................... 19 Helen Russell – Breast Cancer Survivor .................................................................... 20 National Candy Corn Day ........................................................................................... 24 Sweetest Day.............................................................................................................. 27 Shavonne Osborne – Domestic Violence Survivor ..................................................... 28 Breast Cancer Survivor Story ..................................................................................... 30 WTWWJ 5th Annual Empowerment Conference Review ............................................ 34 Pink Friday Party With A Purpose Review pics........................................................... 36
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
7
Breast Cancer PREVENTION, RISK, & NAVIGATION
LaFarra Young, MD
risks up to 45%. A family history of ovarian cancer as well as prostate cancer may also increase the risk of breast cancer for women and men. If you’re at higher risk of breast cancer, you may need to be screened earlier and more often. It is just dangerous to be unaware of your risk for breast cancer.
G
ood health is an invaluable asset, and knowledge of maintaining health so that we can provide for ourselves and our families is one of the best investments we can make. As women, we have so many responsibilities that we know come with the territory. We must also protect ourselves against unforeseen surprises that may cause disability or worse, compromising our ability to perform duties that are expected of us. Knowledge about our risk of some of the most common diseases that target us can allow us to live without the burden of cancer and other potentially preventable illnesses. Not only is breast cancer preventable in some cases, but it is also survivable in many cases if we are able to detect it early. To honor those who have been faced with breast cancer, often in the fight of their lives, we celebrate October as breast cancer awareness month. One in 8 women in the United States will develop breast cancer in her lifetime. Though rare, males and children can also get breast cancer. Breast cancer is the most common cause of death in United States women and the 2nd most common cause of cancer behind lung cancer. African American women and women of color have a higher mortality or death rate, 42% according to the American Cancer Society, than Caucasian women. In some states like Louisiana and Mississippi, the death rate is 60% higher than Caucasian women. This health disparity is often due to a more advanced disease at presentation, comorbidities like obesity, lack of insurance and/
8
or concern over health care costs. Annual mammography screening of women with no symptoms has decreased the number of women who die from breast cancer; however, African American women still are more likely to be diagnosed with breast cancer prior to age 40 and to also have more aggressive forms of cancer due to triple negative breast cancers. Like race, other nonmodifiable factors that cannot be changed increase our risk of breast cancer. There is an average lifetime risk of 15% breast cancer in women with no symptoms, no history of invasive breast cancer, no history of cancer precursors such as ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) or lobular carcinoma in situ (LCIS), no history of atypia, no family history in a first degree relative, no hereditary syndrome like Cowden syndrome, and no previous radiation (for lymphoma, etc). A family history of breast cancer raises lifetime risk of breast cancer to 20-25%, and the presence of certain genetic mutations in genes such as BRCA1, BRCA2, TP53, and other gene mutations may raise breast cancer
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Many of us know at least one face of this devastating disease. I have known quite a few women with breast cancer, but the story of one of the younger ladies I have known with the disease is so inspiring to me. Many of these ladies, by chance or circumstance, manifest the qualities of modern-day warriors. She was in her late twenties when she was diagnosed. We sold Mary Kay together, and I often teased Ms. T.Y. about how much candy she ate. She loved sweets and said this was something she did that she had control over. Jovial as always, she seemed like she could always muster a beautiful smile. Her daughter has one just like her. We even walked in the breast cancer awareness walk together that year, and she had dyed her short hair vibrant pink because she was a survivor. I learned of her succumbing to this appropriately-so dreaded illness on Facebook one day and began to reflect on those she left behind and how she seemed to enjoy life even when she realized it was slipping away. I had only known her a few months before she passed but will never forget how she inspired me to live each day with gratitude. If she could smile in spite of her circumstances, I definitely had no excuse. Though I knew her for a short time, she will forever be in my heart and is a reminder that
cancer sometimes knows no age or personality. If you find a lump in your breast or have a change in the appearance or texture of your skin overlying your breast, definitely alert your doctor and have questions ready for them to answer. Many lumps are not seen but are instead felt, while others are first identified on screening such as mammography. Monthly self breast exams are no longer recommended by the American Cancer Society (ACS), but it is recommended that you become familiar with the feel and appearance of your breast so that changes are investigated to expose cancer. A clinical breast exam may be performed by a physician but hasn’t been shown to significantly increase detection of breast cancers in averagerisk asymptomatic women according to the American Cancer Society (ACS). Various preventative task forces vary slightly in the age to begin screening by mammography. The American Cancer Society (ACS) recommends screening by mammography at 40. Screening with mammography has reduced the risk of death from breast cancer by at least 20%, with early detection allowing for more conservative treatment like breastsparing surgeries or avoidance of chemotherapy. How does one navigate the medical system to achieve the best possible chance at survival from this devastating disease? Patient navigation programs such as the one offered by the ACS may simplify issues such as finding rides to treatment centers, insurance navigation, and explaining the treatment process to those seeking advice. Having familiarity with the risk factors and having questions prepared about your nonmodifiable and modifiable risk factors are critical. Factors like those above cannot be changed, but there are those that we can change. Modifiable factors like a healthy diet consisting of a good balance of vegetables and fruits, getting adequate sleep (an average of 7 hours a night), having
adequate physical activity, having a history of oral contraceptive use or hormone replacement therapy use play a tremendous role in counteracting nonmodifiable risk factors. Doctors will usually ask these questions at a physical; if they don’t, you bring them up. Don’t wait until your next physical even if they are about to walk out the door when you remember. If you find a lump call them to schedule an appointment immediately. You should always know the answer to the following questions: • Menstruation age: Were you younger than 11(menarche) when periods began? • Menopause age: Were you older than 55 when periods stopped? • Oral contraceptives: Have you used them and about how long? • Family history of breast cancer or other related: ovarian, melanoma, prostate cancer • Abnormal genes linked to breast cancer: Do you or family members have the (BRCA1, BRCA2) gene? • Results of past breast biopsies, even benign: Have you had a previous breast biopsy? • Personal history of radiation to face and/or chest before age 30: Did you have this therapy? • Breast density: Do you have heavy dense or less dense fatty breast tissue? • Weight: Are you overweight or obese? • Level of physical activity: Do you get 30 minutes of moderate activity 5 days a week? • Use of postmenopausal HRT: Have you had this type of therapy? • Alcohol consumption: Do you drink 3 or more drinks per week? • Processed food and trans fats you eat: Do you regularly eat vegetables and monitor how many processed foods you eat? Do you eat excess added sugars? • Smoking history: Have you ever smoked? • Full term pregnancy or breastfed: Have you been pregnant up to 37 weeks and/or breastfed one year or more?
Insurance coverage for breast mammography is required by the Affordable care act with no out-ofpocket expenses for new health plans and those offered through the state health insurance exchanges. The American Cancer Society (ACS) has resources for free or low-cost screening mammograms. The ACS recommends using U.S. Preventative Task Forces (USPTF) criteria for coverage (now, age 40 and over) at no cost. The addition of a MRI to mammography is often recommended for women with a lifetime risk higher than 20-25% beginning at the age of 30. The lack of details for coverage on a policy doesn’t mean that it’s not covered. You don’t know if you don’t ask. Treatment generally depends on the stage of the disease when it is diagnosed by a pathologist, usually following a procedure known as a biopsy. Treatments depend on size of the cancer and spread of the cancer to lymph nodes (in addition to the location of the lymph nodes the breast cancer spreads to). Some people are able to avoid chemotherapy and radiation, while others need both. The prognosis of breast cancer following treatment and pathologic examination could range from almost 99% survival at 5 years for stage 1 disease localized to the breast to 22% of those diagnosed at stage 4 after the cancer has spread beyond local lymph nodes. Each person; however, is an individual with unique circumstances and is not a number. There are those who will do better, and there are those who will do worse than expected. Even if you don’t think you have one or more risk factors for breast cancer, please become familiar with them. With so many identified modifiable risk factors that can be used to decrease breast cancer risk, a diagnosis of cancer should no longer be thought of like a death sentence like it once used to be. Just a little knowledge can be so powerful, and the life you save may be your own or someone really special to you.
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
9
10
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
11
Mya Bell's Abstract Photos Mya Bell
is a 16-year-old Mississippi School of The Arts student with a focus in Vocal, Theater and Photography. She is the daughter of Joanne Bell Wright.
12
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
13
Evaluate Your Life Day Date When Celebrated: Always October 19th Evaluate Your Life Day is a bit scary. It sounds just a little bit too serious for my liking. And, what if I evaluate my life, and find out that I don't like it? Well, for starters, you can then make positive changes.
Evaluate Your Life Day
gives us the opportunity to pause and reflect upon our life, where it's been, and where it's going. C'mon, be honest with yourself. Are things going well? What is bothering you? What do you need, or want, to change? How's your appearance? Are you gaining too much weight? With a self-evaluation, you can then make big changes to improve the quality of your life, as necessary. Or, if things are going well, just tinker with small adjustments. We believe that Evaluate Your
Life Day is the beginning of a happier and healthier you! Source: Holidayinsights.com
14
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
15
16
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
THERE IS NOTHING MORE PRECIOUS THAN A NEW BORN CHILD. Most parents and grandparents miss the opportunity to leave a legacy for their children and grandchildren. You can achieve this by putting $50 a month into a Child Asset Builder (CAB) for 20 years which will provide for your child, a permanent life insurance policy, tax free retirement income, funds for a college education and more. Call Jim for an illustration.
Griffith Financial Services Jim Griffith, CEO
907 Morningside Street, Suite D3 Jackson, MS 39202 800.361.6542 (O) 888.317.2615 (F) 510.691.1946 (M)
Text GFS1 to 36260 for mobile app WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
17
BERNARD’S HEALTHY PRODUCTS HempWorx.com/leebernard
Leebernard.jewelpads.com Leebernard.myorganogold.com
18
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Make a Difference Day Date When Celebrated: The fourth Saturday in October Initiated in 1990, this is a national day is for devoted to helping others by doing volunteer work in the community. The activity can be almost anything. On this day, millions of Americans participate in community improvement projects. It takes the form of cleanup, fixup, painting, and repair in poorer neighborhoods, parks and municipal facilities. It doesn't matter what project you take on. It doesn't matter whether you help a non-profit organization, the community, your town, nursing home, a church, a food kitchen, or any other group in need. What matters is that you participate. Make a commitment to help others for just one day. Make a difference on
Make a Difference Day! Did You Know? Each year on Make a Difference Day, ex-President Jimmie Carter gets out his hammer and saw, and helps to build or rebuild housing in underprivileged areas. There is not a better example of people helping others than this! Source: Holidayinsights.com
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
19
Helen Russell H
Breast Cancer Survivor
elen Russell, has been a Pharmacist at Women’s Hospital in Flowood, Mississippi for over 30 years. She has been married for 35 years and has 2 children. She was born in a hospital in Clarksdale, Mississippi and lived in Webb, Mississippi until elementary school when she and her family moved to Greenwood, Mississippi.
Helen was raised to live by the Golden Rule which is, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Her father was a school principal so she spent a lot of time at the school and was able to interact with everyone. Mississippi is home for her and it has been a great experience living here. When Helen’s son Andrew was 5 years old, he was diagnosed with cancer, but he handled it like a champion. He was treated with chemotherapy, radiation and a bone marrow transplant. He won his battle and he now works at Blair E. Batson Children’s Hospital in Jackson, Mississippi. She calls him her miracle.
Surviving Breast cancer Helen has always been proactive by getting her mammogram every year in December and she also does a self-breast exam every month. She has always had dense breast tissue so sometimes they would have to repeat the mammogram and perform an ultrasound, which was the case in December of 2017. After those tests were done, they wanted to perform a biopsy because they spotted something abnormal. “We waited 3 days after the biopsy and the results showed that I had stage 1 breast cancer, we were thankful that it was caught early.” She didn’t have any family history and couldn’t believe this
20
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
“The best guard against breast cancer is to do your self breast exam and get your yearly exams if you are of age, or if you have a family history. Be responsible with your breast health. Do monthly checks no matter how old you are. And if you ever feel anything, you have to go get it checked.” was happening to her. But she stated, “More people than not, don’t have a family history, that’s why it is so important to be responsible with your breast health.” “I was sent to Dr. Ley, a surgical Oncologist. I just wanted it over with, so I chose a double mastectomy. At the time, I didn’t know if I wanted reconstruction or not, I just wanted the cancer gone, so they sent me to a plastic surgeon.” “The “C” word just makes you think all kinds of thoughts and everything seems to be spinning out of control, so when I went to the surgeon, I really couldn’t hear anything he was saying. Once I was able to wrap my mind around everything, I called back and asked the doctor if I could speak with someone that he had performed surgery on, just to weigh the different
options. That’s when I met Peggi Rafferty. They gave me her name and its funny how God works because we hit it off. She was just a few weeks ahead of me in her journey and she really guided me through the entire process.” “I had surgery with reconstruction and I also had to have 7 weeks of radiation. Now, I just go for checkups every six months. After surgery and I was able to get out, Peggi and I met for lunch and have been friends ever since. Then we added two more friends, and then a couple more friends, and now we have a Groupme group called the Breast Friends Forever.” “There are forty-five of us now, and we text back and forth. We pray for one another and we talk about all the things we may be experiencing,
because we know someone in the group has already experienced it and we can walk each other through. We encourage each other. We set our doctor’s appointments on the same day so we don’t have to go alone. It helps pass the time and keeps you calm when you have a buddy system. I highly recommend a support group. I gives you peace of mind that if she did it, I can do it too.” Helen’s support system was amazing and very instrumental in helping her get through her cancer fight. Her work family at Woman’s Hospital was very supportive and her family and extended family was great as well. Her son Andrew was her biggest supporter and her hero. Watching him fight and defeat cancer at such a young age helped her have the courage to fight and win her own fight.
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
21
She would advise any woman who has been diagnosed and about to start going to a lot of doctors' visits; it's always good to take someone with you. When you hear the word cancer, it can make you feel like a deer in the headlights. Take someone who can listen and take notes because you may forget or misunderstand what the doctor said. If that doesn't work, call the doctor back and ask questions. Do your own research for yourself. Educate yourself with all the options. Everyone is different and you have to make your own decision. Take your time, this is a
22
life altering decision. Talk to other women as well. “Don’t be afraid to reach out for support. That doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you’re smart enough to know that you need somebody to help you. You don’t have to go through it alone. It helps to talk about it. Get in a group with people like you, who are going thro gh what you're going through. Sometimes your family may not know what to say, or they don’t want to say the wrong thing, but their presence and support means the most, just to know they are thinking about you.
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Sometimes we just need a hug or a reminder of something normal in our lives.” “The best guard against breast cancer is to do your self breast exam and get your yearly exams if you are of age, or if you have a family history. Be responsible with your breast health. Do monthly checks no matter how old you are. And if you ever feel anything, you have to go get it checked.” “Always allow your faith to be bigger than your fear. Some days will be harder than others, but you can do it.”
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
23
National Candy Corn Day Date When Celebrated: Always October 30th National Candy Corn Day is today. Enjoy a handful of this sweet Fall treat. And, what perfect timing. National Candy Corn Day comes just a day before Halloween. That means you can eat plenty of it, before you go out Trick or Treating. Candy corn is enjoyed all year long. Place it in a candy dish any time of the year, and watch it disappear by the handful. By far, the vast majority of candy corn is consumed during the Fall months, with both Halloween and Thanksgiving being the biggest times to eat it.
24
Candy Corn Trivia: • Candy corn was originally called "Chicken Feed". Aren't you glad they changed the name!? • Candy corn was invented in the 1880s by George Renninger, and first manufactured by the Wunderle Candy Company in Philadelphia, Pa. • The Goelitz Candy company was the first to manufacture mass quantities around the turn of the century. • The original way to make candy corn, was to pour each color separately into molds, a very long, time consuming process.
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
• Today, the Jelly Belly factory has a machine that produces 1200 kernels per second! • Candy corn consists primarily of corn syrup, honey, and sugar. There's lots of carbs(sugar), but it's fat free!? • 19 pieces of candy corn has 38 grams of sugar. • worldwide, over 35 million pound, or 9 billion pieces, are consumed annually. Have a happy National Candy Corn Day. Source: Holidayinsights.com
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
25
26
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Sweetest Day
Date When Celebrated: Third Saturday in October Now here is a day dedicated just for your sweetie. It exists as an opportunity for you to recognize that sweet and special someone. It doesn’t matter who that person is, or what their relation to you. They just have to be "sweet" in order to get a little recognition. Herbert Birch Kingston, a Cleveland, Ohio philanthropist
and candy company employee started Sweetest Day. He wanted to bring happiness to orphans, shut-ins and underprivileged. His intent was to show these people that they were not forgotten. In 1922, he started this holiday by giving candy and small gifts. He often used movie stars to distribute the gifts.
The popularity of this holiday quickly spread. Today, it is celebrated with loved ones and friends. However, we encourage you to follow the intent of the original holiday, and find ways to give candy and small gifts to those in need. Source: Holidayinsights.com
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
27
SHAVONNE OSBORNE
Surviving Domestic Abuse
S
havonne Osborne was born and raised in Biloxi, Mississippi but now resides in Atlanta, Georgia. She is a single mother of 4 and she is an IT Manager for an insurance company.
“My story of domestic violence began at childhood. I was the baby of my mother’s 3 children and my mom was a single parent who worked hard to make sure we were ok. My mom was a victim of domestic violence and she was in several violent relationships, so I grew up seeing violence. When you grow up seeing domestic violence you become a product of it, it creeps in and becomes a part of your DNA. So, the evidence of it trickled down to my brother. As small children, he became very angry and started abusing me and my sister. He would fight us and beat us daily. This was not just sibling rivalry; he would beat us senseless. My brother tried to kill me several times as a child. My mom thought it was customary sibling rivalry but she didn’t realize the extent of what he was doing. She wouldn’t find this out until much later in life that it was more to it than she thought. From there, it trickled down to my sister, because she ended up getting into an abusive relationship. So, all I
28
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
saw throughout my childhood was violence and abuse, and women being physically abused. As a result, I made a conscious decision that when I got to the age of dating, I would never allow a man to put his hands on me. Because I experienced all of that, it made me become this person that would endure a lot from people because in my heart, I just wanted to see people being loved and happy. I felt like I was neglected and didn’t receive the type of love I should have received as a child, so I wanted to be for others what I needed as a child. What I mean by that is being a survivor of domestic violence has equipped me with an emphatic heart. I have a heart for God’s people and I try to show love towards people. I hate to see anyone in pain or hurting and needing love. I do all I can to put a smile on their faces. It was finally revealed that he was angry that my mom had a girl and he told my mom he wanted a little brother. His words to my mom when she brought me home was, “Take that dog back where you got her from.” My mom tried to explain to him that she couldn’t control whether she had a boy or girl, he couldn’t understand it. It felt like me against the world and I didn’t understand and even though this wasn’t a boyfriend or husband, I still suffered domestic violence at the hands of my brother.
it was a lot to endure but I did and I thank God that He kept me.
meeting was perfectly put together by God’s glory.”
I was in the marriage for 19 years and I stayed as long as I did because I wanted my children to be with their mother and father. But it became too toxic and I had to let go. When I finally gained the courage to leave, my baby boy told me that I waited too long and stayed too long.
Shavonne is very devoted to Butterflies because she comes home to Mississippi from Atlanta for each major event. “There is a certain way the organization has to be run, so when Mrs. Eva needs me, I am there. Just because my personal life took me out of Mississippi, it doesn’t stop me from handling my responsibilities. I have to be there to make sure things carry on accordingly.”
I took my job and a role as a mother very seriously. I made sure my kids were covered. I am a very active mother and I teach my children to be proactive, loving, supportive and giving people. You never know what’s going on behind closed doors, so you can’t judge people.” Shavonne became a part of Butterflies By Grace Defined By Faith 7 years ago. She was referred by her Zumba instructor to create a website for Mrs. Eva Jones and she has been with her ever since. “What I remember about that meeting the most is when I first met Mrs. Eva, the first words out of her mouth were, “Hi Beautiful!” She was so bubbly, and I knew she was sincere and that was exactly what I needed at the time. I knew I would be a part of what she was doing. I believe in divine intervention and our
Shavonne’s advice to any young lady who is a victim of domestic violence on any level is to never give up on yourself. Always be true to who you are, nobody can take away your truth unless you allow it. Violence comes in different levels so don’t compare your story to anyone else's. A lot of women may be being controlled sexually, mentally, financially; it’s the same violence, just showing up in a different area. Mental abuse is most times worse than physical because It will strip you of your dignity and character and you begin to not even recognize yourself. Always know your truth and don’t let anyone take it from you.
Even though it wasn’t my husband that I suffered physical abuse from, my ex-husband played a role as well, and this is where it is very pivotal when it comes to talking to victims of domestic violence because there are different levels to it. My ex-husband knew my secret and he used that against me. His contribution was financially, emotionally, and mentally, because he had to have control. His abuse came in those forms. I was limited in the contact I could have with my family, I couldn’t go to the grocery store because he was afraid I would be looked at by other men,
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
29
Breast Cancer Awareness By Salmeilia Stewart
A
s we celebrate breast cancer awareness month, I can’t help but think about all the women whose lives were forever changed. I’ve had the opportunity to listen to women who are breast cancer survivors, those who are still in the fight, and others who unfortunately, the Lord called home. I think about all the times I would notice the bumper sticker of the pink ribbon on the back of a car or the pink t-shirts that say "Fight Against Breast Cancer." I never thought the day would come when the person I loved the most was diagnosed with breast cancer. My mother would always get her annual mammogram. She has
30
always been a person who would go to the doctor anytime she suspected anything wrong. In 2018, my mother felt a small lump in her left breast and decided to go to the doctor. After the testing, the nurse called my mom with her lab results,
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
and it stated that further testing should be done on her right breast and not her left breast. After further examination, it determined that they spotted a lump on her right breast, but it was non-cancerous. My mother couldn't receive the good news. She knew that she went to the doctor because she felt something in her left breast, not her right breast. My aunt that lives in Southaven, MS advised my mother to get a second opinion from her doctor. After the ultrasound they spotted a lump in her left breast cancer, but they wanted to do further testing. My mother called me in March of 2018 and told me that after much testing, she might have breast
cancer. She asked if I would go to the doctor with her to get the final results. Around that time, I was already going through a lot of stress between work and other activities. When I thought I couldn't take anything else, here comes this. I remember praying to God, "Please don't allow my mom to have breast cancer." I didn't know if my mother could handle this, knowing that she has suffered from anxiety most of her life. Selfishly, I didn't think I could either. Of course, who wants to see their mother suffer like that? I just prayed to God, and I believed He would answer. I drove home to Leland, MS to pick my mother up so we could then drive to Southaven, MS. I noticed my mother was very calm the entire time while I was somewhere between fear and faith. When we arrived at the doctor's office, it seems as though it took forever. My mother, the entire time, was laughing and joking with my uncle. Meanwhile, the prayer warrior was panicking. Well, the nurse came in, and the moment we all had been waiting for was finally here. We went to the backroom, and my mother was still as calm as ever. The doctor came into the room and sat down. He gave my mother her test results which determined that she had stage 2 breast cancer. My mother just smiled and nodded. I was trying to be strong but was screaming on the inside. The doctor told my mom that a second opinion was the best decision she could have made. He assured her that the cancer was small enough to be treated. He advised her not to worry because he was sending her to one of the best doctors in the area. He knew that we were not from the area so he made it to where my mom could see her oncologist the very next day. We visited West Cancer Center in Southaven, MS the next day. From the initial visit, my mother
received the best of care. The staff was amicable, and they thoroughly explained everything. My mother's doctor was the best. She was very caring and nurturing. She told my mother that they were going to do everything they could to beat this. We were informed that my mother had a very aggressive form of cancer, and the plan was to treat it aggressively. It was after the initial visit I had accepted that God was in control. God doesn't always answer our prayers as we want. Just because God didn't miraculously and instantaneously heal my mother doesn't mean the healing didn't come. She was going to have to walk out her healing one day at a time. I knew God was in control because my mother listened to a small voice that told her to go to the doctor. God worked through my aunt as he advised her to get a second opinion. The doctor and nurses were all willing to passionately help my mother fight cancer. My mother's health insurance was good, but my mother also had a cancer policy. The funny thing is a couple of months before she was diagnosed, she had let her cancer policy lapse and the insurance company called and asked her if she wanted to renew her policy. God was already at work. I decided that I would join my mother in the fight. When she started chemo, all of her hair fell out. I decided to cut my hair off too, to let her know she was not alone. On my days off, I would have to drive from Jackson to Leland, MS, and then from Leland, MS to Southaven, MS. Even though I would be exhausted, I enjoyed those drives. I would watch and listen to my mother talk about her faith. It allowed me to spend quality time with her wherein other times I would have been too consumed with work. My uncle Willie and my aunt Carrie are the real MVP's. They opened their home to us so we wouldn't have to turn around and go
back. They were beyond hospitable. My uncle would always keep my mother laughing, and my mother assured me that she would be ok because she took her medicine, meaning she would read the Bible in the morning and at night. I watched my mother walk out of her faith. The only complaint she would have would be mild nausea, and later she developed neuropathy in her hands. In September 2019, my mother was officially cancer-free. After six months of treatment, my mother had won the battle against cancer. All I could think about was this was the same woman that had been on anxiety medicine most of her life, the woman that we would have to guard against any bad news because of anxiety attacks, and I witnessed her handle this situation like a warrior. I was immensely encouraged as she walked out her healing. The entire time, I watched God give her so much peace, love, encouragement, and faith alongside her healing. She didn't have to pay one dime for any medical bills. Hallelujah, to God be the Glory. Today, she is a part of a fantastic cancer support group where she offers encouragement to other women who are in the fight. She is also amongst other survivors, where they have an opportunity to share their faith. Even though my mother is a survivor, there is always the threat of it returning. Every day she has the choice to walk in faith or fear. The good news is my mother just had her checkup, and she is still cancer-free. My mother always takes her medicine every morning and every night, which is the Word of God. God is a healer, He is a provider, and He is right there cheering us on to victory. So, whoever you are, wherever you are, no matter what the obstacle or challenge is, keep trusting God during the process.
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
31
Virgie Hicks 662-392-5560
Heavenly Treasures for $5 www.heavenlytreasuresfor5@gmail.com www.heavenlytreasuresfor5.com https://heavenly-treasures-for-5.square.site
32
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Mary Kay Independent Sales Director Shirley Lockett 601-291-5779 marykay.com/slockett6 499 S Pear Orchard Ridgeland Ms 39157 Free glam facials every Sunday 6pm POOLHOUSE
The smart way to remodel your bath
RECEIVE A
FREE GIFT UP TO
400
$
*
value with same day purchase
I teach skincare & enrich the lives of others.
• No demolition
OR
• Installed in as little as one day
NO INTEREST
• Hotel quality, high gloss acrylic bathtub and wall
FOR
24 MONTHS
**
• Easy to clean, virtually maintenance free • Millions of Satisfied Customers • Lifetime warranty †For as long as you own your home.
Call for your FREE in-home consultation
601-301-9104
6520 COLE ROAD SUITE B, RIDGELAND, MS 39157
B AT H F I T T E R . C O M
* Special offer good on the purchase of a bathtub or shower, wall and faucet kit. One offer per customer. May not be combined with any other offer. Offer must be presented at the time of estimate. Discount applies to same day purchases only. Previous orders and estimates excluded. Offer valid only at the above location. ** Subject to credit approval. Minimum monthly payments required. † Subject to certain limitations.
387068489_BFU309_3.9375x5.1875in_V3.indd 1
8/20/19 8:24 AM
2-5TH, 2020 EARLY BIRD DISCOUNT ENDS 11/30/19
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
33
Woman To Woman With Joanne’s
5th Annual Empowerment Conference Review
34
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
35
Pink Friday Party Review
36
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
37
Mississippi Coalition
Against Domestic Violence Review
38
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019
Woman To Woman With Joanne’s Let’s Talk Sessions provide a safe environment for women to come and share whatever is on their heart - burdens, struggles, joys. We invite women to share openly without fear of being judged, talked about, or broadcast all over social media.
Upcoming Events for
2019
Let’s Talk Sessions are held at the Mantle once a month.
August
August 31st - 5th Annual Empowerment Conference 9am - 1pm Mississippi Civil Rights Museum 222 North St. Jackson, MS
October October 17th Let’s Talk Session, 7pm - 8pm 622 Duling Ave Jackson, MS 39216
September
- Annual September 19th
Let’s Talk Session 7pm - 8pm 6pm - 9pm 622 Duling Ave Jackson, MS 39216 1oam - 2pm
November November 21st Let’s Talk Session, 7pm - 8pm 622 Duling Ave Jackson, MS 39216
December December 19th Let’s Talk Session, 7pm - 8pm 622 Duling Ave Jackson, MS 39216
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE
39
40
WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE : THE MAGAZINE • Issue 26, August 2019