1st Anniversary Issue
M AY 2 0 1 7
THE MAGAZINE
MOUNTAIN MOVERS
Maximus Wright • Kenya Parks • Felix Anderson
Page 8
Mississippi Legends Ball Review Pages 12-14
Celebrate the Nurturer Page 16
Personal Style Page 18
Mother’s Day Tributes Pages 20-26
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Publisher & Editor Joanne Bell CEO Joanne Bell Contributing Writers Salmeilia Stewart Dr. Timothy Quinn JaMya Bell Nate Coleman Petite LaToya Michelle Myricks Roikenshia Craig Cover Design by Latasha Willis Layout Design Latasha Willis Cover Photo and Inside Cover Story Photo John Greer Photography Cover Background Credit Jeri Koegel/Flickr Facebook: Woman to Woman with Joanne the Magazine Website: www.JoanneSBell.com
Joanne’s Desk BY JOANNE BELL, FOUNDER
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s we embark upon our third annual Empowerment Conference with Woman to Woman with Joanne, I am just amazed. I look at all the obstacles that tried to stand in the way of the conference, the magazine and life itself, but I smile knowing that God has not brought us this far to leave us now. This is only the beginning of what He has in store, and I stand in awe of how much He loves us and wants to richly bless us. I am forever grateful to you, the readers of our magazine, for getting us to where we are today, internationally known with readers all over the world. It wasn’t easy, but we made it and there is so much more to come. Wow! This has definitely been a wild ride. Our magazine started May 6, 2016 and here we are a year later! I am so amazed at the things we have accomplished in one year, and I look forward to much more. I want to share as many stories as possible of the beautiful and wonderful women here in Mississippi. Our stories need to be told, and it is our right to tell them the way we want them told. Let’s move forward proudly and hold our heads up high! We are beautiful! We are strong! We are Mississippi! Love ya much!
Joanne
In This Issue
Cover Story - Maximus Wright, Kenya Parks & Felix Anderson ................................ 8-10 Spring Forward ........................................................................................................................ 11
Contact us at woman2woman.joanne@ yahoo.com 601-398-6733
Mississippi Legends Ball Review ........................................................................................ 12-14
P.O. Box 2031 Ridgeland, MS 39158
3 Reasons Why Your Personal Style Is Important .......................................................... 18
All rights reserved. No portion of Woman to Woman with Joanne may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. The management of Woman to Woman with Joanne is not responsible for opinions expressed by its writers. Woman to Woman with Joanne maintains the unrestricted right to edit or refuse all submitted material. All advertisements are subject to approval by the publisher. The production of Woman to Woman is funded by advertising and sponsorship.
Overcomers ............................................................................................................................... 28
Celebrate the Nurturer ............................................................................................................ 16 Mya's Corner .............................................................................................................................. 17
Mother's Day Tributes ..................................................................................................... 20-26
Recipe: Blackened Catfish with Cajun Butter Sauce ........................................................ 30 Replenish to Empty, Empty to Replenish ........................................................................ 34 Our Sponsors ............................................................................................................................. 35
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My Mountain of Self Rejection BY MAXIMUS WRIGHT
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aximus Wright is a Soulpreneur, filmmaker and author. Formally trained by Mamie Brown's baby boy Les Brown, Maximus Wright has spent the last 20 years fusing traditional ministry and entrepreneurship. Soulpreneurship was birthed to free the mind, will and emotions (souls) of God's people to help them fulfill their life's purpose and make a living doing so. In 2014, Maximus Wright founded Phoenix Rising Entertainment, a fully operational production company focused on telling the stories that need to be told. Currently, Maximus is finishing his first featured film, “Soul Damage,” staring Tony Grant and Palmer Williams from Tyler Perry's "Love Thy Neighbor," and it also features Shirley Murdock and Clyde Jones. Maximus has also just released his first book with the same title in which the movie is based. Maximus is also one of the speakers at our third annual Empowerment Conference 2017. With the topic of the conference being “What If the Mountain Doesn’t Move,” we asked Maximus to speak to us about a mountain that has been in his life and to tell us a little about how he has
overcome that mountain. Read what he had to say: To be rich and famous was never a desire of mine. I just wanted to be rich. I didn’t want to stand out. But standing out is something that has happened all my life. It is hard to fathom that I would stand out being a mere 5´8˝, but it was something I would learn very early on to hate. I never fit in as a child, and being an only child for almost eight years made me quite acquainted with loneliness. Loneliness and silence to a child can be as cruel as solitary confinement, and its touch never completely leaves your soul, but it was in the loneliness and silence that my creativity was birthed, the greatest reason I would ever stand out. I am from a small town, where I grew up chopping cotton and the most that you should hope for was to get a good paying job, buy a house and raise a family. My uncles were big burly men who were skilled with their hands. The only reason I reference them is that in that agricultural system, they were genetically perfect… and I was not. My imperfections caused me to see the striking differences to the men I wanted most to be like in a system I was born in but was not born for. A feeling of being inadequate becomes second nature because “Why can’t you change the oil, you’re almost 14. I was overhauling engines at 10.” My tools were my imagination, and they were unfit for replacing hoses and changing spark plugs. My matriculation into manhood somehow seemed less. My love for words and poetry further alienated me and brought even more unwanted attention. It wasn’t long before I associated education and creativity with isolation and ridicule. So, I suppressed all things creative and learned how to dumb down so I wouldn’t make others uncomfortable. “Don’t answer everything.” “Girls don’t
like nerds.” “Blend in. People will like you better,” were all the things a child told himself so he could have friends. But my friends were sharing a friendship with an imposter. I was born to stand out, but I didn’t know how to reconcile this and keep my friends at that same time. This became the fight of my life. There are consequences for standing out and there are consequences for never fully being yourself. I constantly looked for validation to numb the touch of this old friend’s constant reminder to never stand out because people may become jealous and dislike you. All of my attempts to keep people in my life failed miserably, and my loneliness and isolation were never far away. It took years of failure after failure after failure for me to realize the life I was trying to live was not designed for me and just because I was born in a system didn’t mean I had to die there. I tried as hard as I could to be an average guy, even to the point of hiding my name, but nothing prospered and I was still alone. However, it was in that aloneness that God spoke and Maximus finally stepped into the light, and the mountain of self-rejection became the journey of self-discovery.
His book, Soul Damage, can be purchased on Amazon, Kindle or from his website, www.Pho3nixrisingentertainment.com.
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The Mountains in My Life BY KENYA PARKS
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enya Parks is the founder of Kenya's Korner, a ministry created to minister to the soul, mind and body of ladies across the globe. Kenya is a speaker, author, mentor, and a service coach but most importantly, she is a mother first. This young lady is allowing her mess to become her message to minister to women around the world. Kenya Parks is a voice of healing for her generation. Her undeniable leadership style meshed with the practical principles of how to overcome adversity has made her a sought-after leader and speaker. After years of living with hatred and bitterness and failed relationships she released her bottled-up energy on the pages of journals. It was during this journey that she realized her healing placed on the pages of her personal journal was the answer to those facing abuse. In her book, Coming Back to Me, Kenya reflects on how this abuse affected her relationships, jobs, family and communion with everyday people.
We asked Kenya to speak with us about her mountains, and this is what she had to say: I am so glad I don't look like what I have been through. Sometimes it feels like I'm living with good intentions, praying with all my heart, aiming for God's best, but the mountains in my life kept getting higher and higher. In my mind, this was surely a sign that God wasn't with me. I entered relationships with men before learning to love myself. I became a mother not knowing how to unselfishly love someone else. I became friends with women I despised. I became angry and bitter because my brokenness I was trying to hide. After being sexually assaulted at the tender age of only eight years old, I felt like I had nothing left to live for. I grew up not understanding the true essence of who I really was. The mountains in my life started then, and it took me years to learn how to move mountains in my life I thought couldn't be moved. I couldn't go around the mountains in my life no matter how hard I tried. I couldn't climb the mountain because it was just too dangerous. Throughout most of my life, I realized that I was just living life. My life had no purpose and I wasn't striving for anything throughout my journey in life. My life simply lacked purpose. One night, a friend invited me to a revival service and there were hundreds of people there. It was as though God was only speaking to me. It was in that moment my life would never be the same again. I began to understand my purpose when I began obeying God’s Word instead of doing what I wanted. I began to understand the purpose for all the pain I had experienced or would continue to experience in my life. The mountains in my life began to get smaller when I began to activate the faith
that was on the inside of me. When I began to believe that I served a God that is bigger than any mountain that I could be faced with. God has called me to a greater walk with Him and I am walking within His authority wholeheartedly. I am no longer just surviving - I am thriving elegantly! Somewhere along the way, I lost myself, but today I am coming back to woman God created me to be.
You can find Kenya’s book at www.kenyascorner.org. PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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Celebrate Your Scars The “I’m Hurt But I’m Healing” Mindset BY FELIX M. ANDERSON
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cars serve as a reminder of what not to do, where not to go and who not to call. Healing and how you heal is a very touchy subject as there is no cookie cutter way to grieve. The purpose of this chapter is to encourage you not to allow what hurt you to hinder you from moving forward. Healing is indeed a process and although many say that time heals, I have found that time helps but it doesn’t guarantee healing. One of the first steps to healing is acknowledging your feelings because pain does not discriminate. You must give yourself permission to feel so that you can truly heal. I’ve always been a firm believer that it’s important to surround yourself with strong friends when you are having weak moments as you embrace your healing. When my mom was murdered as a victim of domestic violence, my perspective on life changed forever. It made me become more legacy focused and aware of how I treat people and how I spend my time. I’m sharing this because someone reading this need to know that no matter what has happened to you or in your past, you cannot let the memory of what happened stop you from moving forward. Never Become Too Busy to Feel The day my mom was murdered began as a normal day to me. The day was beautiful in the sense that I had the opportunity to speak with her that morning prior to her death about her upcoming trip. The second week in September was always an exciting time for me as my mom always made the annual trip from Michigan to visit family for the Southern Heritage Classic football game in Memphis, Tennessee. That all changed the next day when I received the news that she had been murdered by her ex-husband a few hours after we spoke. My initial response was shock and it caused a sense of numbness for me. It was my walk with God and faith in God that served as the source of my strength during the initial moments. Although I had quoted Philippians 4:7 which says “And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” many times, that moment was the first time I totally understood it. It was during these moments that I realized what was in me was greater than what was going on around me. During the days and weeks after
her death, my primary focus was handling all estate affairs and business related to her homegoing service. The process was longer than normal as my family had to wait on the autopsy and murder investigation to be complete. We then had to coordinate transporting my mother’s body from Michigan to Mississippi after it was released to a funeral home hours away from the city in which she was murdered. After flying her body to Mississippi, my family then had to make arrangements with a local funeral home to coordinate the homegoing services. In all the planning and handling business, the one thing that I was too busy to do was take some time and feel. I never slowed down enough to process my emotions and give myself time to feel the pain so that I could heal properly. You may be able to numb your pain, but you can’t avoid it because it will soon resurface. Do Not Take It Personally My mom’s homegoing service was just the first layer of pain that I had to get over. With family member’s emotions on high and edge, things that were never said came out as displaced anger. The lesson learned during this second phase of healing for me was understanding that you cannot take anything personally when pain is involved. Many times people hurt you not because they purpose to, you just happened to be the only and closest thing for them to lash out and project their anger unto. These things cannot be taken personally. When you take the pain caused by others personally, you make it about you when it is not about you which can cause it to become detrimental to your personal relationships. This is why it is important that you find a healthy outlet to lean on. You may have to lean on your faith, your friends and your family. Writing, praying, journaling and counseling helps with ensuring that the feelings of rejection, disappointment and betrayal that caused you pain do not turn into bitterness. The key in this process is to acknowledge that you are indeed hurt but you are healing. Forgiveness Is a Process Each day you have to make a decision to forgive. You have to choose to think good thoughts and to think the best at all times. Forgiveness is a decision you must make and something that you must practice everyday. It will not always be easy but when love is
the goal, it will be worthwhile. While there are many types of love, when you are purposed in your heart to forgive, you must strive for the Agape kind of love at all times. Months after my mom’s murder I had to put this into practice. While the wound of her passing was still fresh, I would find myself reliving it all over again as I endured a 15-hour drive along icy roads and four-inch snow from Mississippi to Michigan for the sentencing of her murderer. The same man that ask me if he could have my mom’s hand in marriage was the same man that used those very hands to take her life. I had this replaying in my mind the entire journey up until the day of the sentencing. Standing only feet away from my mom’s murderer, every negative emotion within me was visible and the thoughts of hurting the person that hurt me and my family was all that was on my mind. As these thoughts raced through my mind, I faintly heard the voice of the judge in the background as he asked if the family had anything to say to the accused. The eyes of every armed guard were on me as my entire disposition expressed the anger that was in my heart. As I approached the stand to speak, a calm yet gentle peace came over me as I could hear God say to me crystal clear, “When you choose not to forgive people here on earth, you forfeit your reservations in heaven.” As my mouth opened, the hate filled words that I had planned to say to my mom’s murderer were changed to “I do not respect you, but I forgive you.” Saying those words were hard because it did not reflect how I really felt. Even though I obeyed God, my flesh still wanted to respond. My flesh, my mind and my spirit were all at war with each other. Not only did God speak to me during that brief moment, but I had a conversation with myself as I tried to remove the death stare from my face. I found myself saying over and over again, “Who in hell is worth you going to hell over?” as I slowly walked back to my seat. What helped me overcome this pain was my faith and obedience to God in the middle of my storm. The pain is still real and recovering from it is a daily task. This one thing I know to be true and that is, on the other side of your pain is purpose and on the other side of your pain is healing. Give yourself time for both to manifest properly and don’t rush the process. God will always give you an opportunity to right (continued on page 11)
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SpringForward BY SALMEILIA JE' STEWART
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his season brings forth one of my favorite times of the year. Yeah, of course it's the season in which lies my birthday, but spring is a time for new beginnings. This is the season that symbolizes growth and change. It's a season of an expectant amount of both sunshine and rain. However, the storms that do come are never meant to destroy you, but only to make you better. I strongly believe that this is the season that God wants His children to experience Him in a new way like never before. I believe the Creator wants us to totally surrender and commit ourselves wholeheartedly to His Word and to His purpose. As I begin to reflect over my life, I can see countless times where I made so many wrong decisions simply because I was operating out of fear, pride and ignorance. I simply didn't trust God’s plan for my life. Sad thing is I found myself not only trying to manipulate God's plan but I was looking for Him to clean up the mess I made. If we are truly honest, how different would our lives be if we were a little more patient, less controlling and more obedient? For most, I'm sure we could have escaped experiencing some pain and heartbreak. Nevertheless, those experiences help build character and give birth to so much wisdom. At this present moment in my life, I thank God for being so merciful, loving, kind and generous. It's never too late to start over. The Bible says, “You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted
by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24). God knew how easy it would be to revert back to your old ways and temptations. However, through the power of Lord and Savior, we can begin to create new habits that will bring us closer to fulfill the plan God has over our lives. We must always remember to stay on the course despite our discomfort, fear or lack of understanding. I believe that if we continue to stay in God’s Word, through Jesus we are able to overcome anything that so easily holds us back. It is God's will for His people to walk in total victory, peace, and above all things, love. As believers, we can spring forward to the will of God by allowing ourselves to be spirit led instead of being led by our flesh. As I stated before, I can count numerous times when I made decisions out of my flesh. My plan made sense; it was convenient and familiar. My plan consisted of me gaining so much while sacrificing so little. My plan made me look like the complete hero. As I viewed God's plan through my tiny brain, all I could see was fear, embarrassment and how long it would take. However, the truth is my plans only gave birth to more fear and embarrassment, and I found myself making the same mistakes over and over again. This only delayed the process. Every time I truly obeyed the voice of the Lord, even though there was a horror story going on in my
head, I always gave birth to another level of love, patience, confidence and peace. The Bible says, “For those who are led by the Spirit of God, are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by Him we cry Abba, Father” (Romans 8:14-15). We are no longer children of the world, but we are children of the Most High. We no longer have to be held captive by fear or old belief systems. We can begin to embrace the love of God and experience freedom. We can begin to take on new challenges and experience greater victories because we are being led by our Father. We are connected to something far greater than what this world has to offer and therefore through Jesus we can truly do all things. When our Father asks us to do something, we can walk confidently in His love. Where there was once a time that the storms of life would rattle our faith, we can abide in peace that God will see us through. We no longer have to see ourselves through the eyes of man, which can easily ignite fear, but we can allow God's love to spring us forward. May we all be encouraged during this season of new beginnings. May we gain a better understanding of ourselves through God's Word. With each step we take, may we continue to trust our Father through moments of doubt and uncertainty. May we all spring forward into a season of favor, progress, purpose and love. PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
your wrongs and sometimes cause you to cross paths of those you may have wronged or those that may have wronged you. Forgiveness is a serious matter and being able to walk in instant forgiveness is a measure of your maturity. Understand that forgiveness is a process, especially when you’ve been hurt really bad. Just because you forgive them today does not mean you have to do lunch with them tomorrow. Forgiveness is mandatory but reconciliation isn’t. The most important thing to remember is that we must give ourselves time to heal to the place where we learn how to eventually walk in instant forgiveness. Forgiveness takes practice and practice takes time. Unforgiveness Causes More Hurt If we have been deeply hurt by ѕоmеоnе in thе раѕt, wе еаrnеѕtlу dеѕirе to flee that раin аnd be ѕеt free frоm thе wоundѕ. A thоught you should bear in mind iѕ that bу consciously or unconsciously hаrbоuring аngеr, bittеrnеѕѕ аnd unforgiveness towards
that реrѕоn, wе unwittinglу participate in keeping thоѕе wоundѕ frеѕh аnd unable to hеаl. Thаt is оnе rеаѕоn why Jеѕuѕ spoke so оftеn оf the imроrtаnсе of fоrgiving thоѕе whо hаvе wrоngеd uѕ. Bу not fоrgiving them, we hurt оurѕеlvеѕ еvеn further. If you don’t forgive them, soon or later you’re going to start to resemble the people who hurt you. Forgiveness isn’t for them, it’s for you. Forgive Others Forgiveness does not make them right, it makes you free. The mоѕt liberating Biblical truth thаt hеlрѕ us to forgive thоѕе who have trеаtеd uѕ unjuѕtlу iѕ tо rесоgniѕе thе dерthѕ to which God hаѕ fоrgivеn uѕ. Forgiveness is oftentimes an act of faith. Don’t wait on a feeling to forgive people because you may never feel like forgiving them. Deal with your feelings later, but forgive them now so that you can move on from that situation. Forgive them and forgive yourself.
FORGIVENESS LETTER To every person that mistreated me and abused my love, I forgive you. To every person that caused me pain and made me doubt how great I was born to be, I forgive you. To every person that lied to me, I forgive you. To every person that rejected me and told me NO, I want to say thank you for expelling yourself out of my life when I was too blind to see that you weren’t part of my purpose. Thank you for helping me not waste my time on you and with you. I FORGIVE YOU!
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Woman to Woman with Joanne presents the
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Mississippi Legends Ball
Honoring Women in Mississippi Who Fought for Our Civil Rights This event was even more beautiful than I could have imagined. It was such a joy to Honor Chief Vickie Marie McNeill, Mrs. Orbra Harrington-Porter, Mrs. Frankye Adams-Johnson and Mrs. Dolores Lynch-Williams. This night was filled with song, laughter and tears of joy and I am so proud to have been a part of this. Congratulations, ladies! You deserved this and so much more! The evening started with the Negro National Anthem, Lift Every Voice and Sing, and was followed by a tribute to Mrs. Fannie Lou Hamer by Ms. Salmeilia Stewart, who did an amazing Job. Next was the portrayal of Chief Vickie Marie McNeil by Mrs. Tammye Anderson-Brown, who brought Mrs. McNeill to tears as she told her story. Following was Miss Mya Bell, who portrayed Mrs. Orbra Harrington-Porter with her story of integrating Hardy Junior High School with the same feelings of Mrs. Orbra when performing. Next was Ms. April Bigham portraying Mrs. Dolores Lynch-Williams, reminding her of parts of her story that she had never told even her children about. Of course, this was an emotional time. Following her was the awesome Charence Higgins portraying Mrs. Frankye Adams-Johnson, the Black Panther! She was powerful in her deliverance of Mrs. Johnson and it was simply beautiful. Last was a tribute to my beautiful mom, Helen Ruth Sandifer, by the lovely Ashley Everette. She did a marvelous job and our hearts were filled with joy. The connections that have been made with these women alone is what Woman to Woman with Joanne is all about, connecting women who under any other circumstances would never cross paths. Let's inspire and encourage each other beyond any circumstance we may face! Love ya much!
Joanne
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ALL PHOTOS BY RODNEY MCGEE PHOTOGRAPHY
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16 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • May 2017
Celebrate the Nurturer BY DR. TIMOTHY QUINN
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other’s Day is a day to celebrate the nurturer. I remember watching my mother work two jobs, and fulfill her motherly duties. This was extremely difficult as a single parent. She had to literally “bring home the bacon, and cook it.” My father was in the picture, but due to his responsibilities with his new family in another city, his abilities to help were limited for me and my younger brother. My mother was one who did not allow a situation to define her reality. She gave this concept to my brother and me, which turned out to be her greatest gift to help us gain the success that we have today. I remember her coming home from her second job as a grocery store cashier asking us to show our homework as she walked into the house. When the homework was not completed, she would stay up with us until it was complete, even though she had to wake up early the next morning to go to her first job as a bank teller. My mother sacrificed her life to make sure her boys had all they needed. My mother used to prepare healthy meals at home, and made sure that we got a physical every year. I remember her telling us that it was important that her boys were healthy. When I got older, getting a yearly physical was mandatory due to a requirement to participate in sports. As a family physician, I can now really appreciate
why we were forced to get these physicals every year. Many children who don’t get physicals have undiagnosed problems that interfere with their ability to perform well in school. Many of these problems can be diagnosed during a routine physical exam, and due to the early detection, they can be successfully treated. These children can have their success in school uninterrupted. An example includes a child who came to my clinic with complaints of a rash. I convinced the father to allow us to perform a physical exam. He was initially against the idea, but when we explained that it would not take a lot of time, he agreed. It was determined that the child had compromised vision, and we referred the child for an evaluation for corrective lenses. The mom brought the child to the clinic six months later, and thanked me and my staff for helping her son. The mother told of how the child’s grades improved, and expressed an even greater gratitude due to the child’s behavior improving. It was revealed that the child could not clearly see the words on the board, and in his books. The mom was so excited to announce that her child went from being considered to repeat the year to now having the strong possibility of matriculating to the next year as one of the top performers of his class. My mom always made sure that my brother and I had health insurance. An example of a
scenario that helps me to appreciate this was a child that I saw last year in my clinic. The child did not have health insurance. We saw the child and prescribed antibiotics for an upper respiratory tract infection. One week later, I got a call from the emergency room to inform me that my patient was admitted for pneumonia. The nurse informed me that the patient did not get the antibiotics that I had prescribed due to the mom reporting an inability to pay for them at the pharmacy. The nurse told of how the patient qualified for Medicaid, which the hospital social worker would be able to help the mother process while in the hospital. There are unfortunately too many scenarios as these last two examples. This Mother’s Day, let’s celebrate our mothers. This Mother’s Day includes a challenge to all the mothers reading this article to give our children the gift of their yearly physical if it has not been done. I want to also challenge all of our mothers to make sure that they do everything in their power to ensure that their children have active health insurance if they have not already done so. Mothers ensuring that their children’s health is not compromised is one of the most valuable gifts a mother can give.
For more information, visit our website: www.askdrquinn.com PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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MYA'S CORNER:
Happy Mother's Day! BY JAMYA BELL
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Hello, everyone! Wow, I can’t believe it is spring! Yaaaay! I get to celebrate my sister’s birthday and go out of town and see family. But enough about what I get to do, I am here to talk about my amazing sister and my outstanding mom. First off, my sister turned 22 on March 15th. I can’t believe it! She is the best sister ever! She has special needs but she is just as normal as the rest of us and let me tell you, just because she has special needs doesn’t mean anything. Whatever she says she wants to do, she does it. She doesn’t let anything stop her. She has done cheer, basketball, soccer, bowling, track and more! Also, in every one of these sports she either has a medal or a trophy and I am so proud of her. The best thing about her is that she won’t let anyone tell her that she can’t do anything. I love you, big sister. You’re probably wondering where she got that personality from. It was my amazing, outstanding, excellent and beautiful beloved mother. I could go on and on. My sister would have never been able to do any of those things if it wasn’t for my mom. When my sister said she wanted to do those things, my mom said, “Okay, let’s do it,” because she believed in her and I did, too. It just brings me to tears knowing how hard my mom works for us and cares about us. I wouldn’t want to trade my mom for the world. I wouldn’t be right here right now if it wasn’t for my mom. My brother would have never gotten a scholarship to college if it wasn’t for my mom. I just want to say thank you, Mom, for everything. I love you so much! I’m glad we all struggled together and went through what we went through, because Jesus struggled and look at Him now. He put us back on our feet and keeps pushing us forward. I just want everyone to know that you can do anything, no matter what you’re dealing with. Don’t let anything or anyone stop you from doing what you want to do.
JaMya Elisabeth Bell (Mya, for short) is a native of Crystal Springs, Mississippi, and currently lives in Gluckstadt, Mississippi. She loves to sing, act, cook and draw, and her favorite sports are basketball and track. In addition to stage performances, she has appeared on the TV show “Nashville” and the film “Soul Damage.” She is the daughter of Woman to Woman with Joanne’s founder and CEO, Joanne Bell. PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
3 Reasons Why
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Your Personal Style is Important
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re you keeping up with your resolutions? Did one of those resolutions involve you stepping out of your shell? About this time, people have forgotten the promises they have made for themselves. However, I am standing firm by mine. Towards the end of last year, I was introduced to Kiyada Upshaw’s Personal Style E-book. It is short, sweet, and straight to the point. No history lesson required. This e-book not only got me thinking about my personal style, but it pushed me to immediately start incorporating it. For some, personal style may not be a big idea and to others, you may not know where to start. If you haven’t guessed by now, my resolution or promise to myself was to keep developing and showing off my style. Like many, it is something I never thought about or I was even aware of. Growing up in the Mississippi Delta, I didn’t have an opportunity to really experience fashion. Fashion didn’t become a part of my life until I started my first professional job over 10 years ago. Therefore, I want to give you some reasons why you need to start thinking about it: 1. It’s an Expression of Who You Are There’s so many ways to show your personality and true self without say-
ing a word with the clothes that you wear. Have you heard the saying, “If you don’t tell your story, then no one else will”? Well, today I think it’s about time for you to start telling your own story. What do you want people to see when they look at you? Do you want them to see a person of confidence, strong, brave, meek, plain or vibrant? Clothes, hairstyles, jewelry and makeup can tell a lot about who you are. All of these or some can become part of your personal style. 2. You Never Know Who Is Watching Before you start going off and saying “I don’t care who’s watching,” keep in mind those dreams and aspirations that you’ve kept in your heart. You never know who God may place in your path at the grocery store or nail salon. That promotion you’ve been waiting for could very well come from the way you dress. “Dress for the job you want,” or better yet, like the business owner that you are aspiring to be.
Even if your style is sweat pants, dress it up a little bit. One of my Instagram readers, @pinkandgabulous, stated, “I’m one of those who dresses up to go to the store. Not in heels or anything, but definitely like I’m going somewhere. They say if you stay ready, you ain’t gotta get ready.” I couldn't agree more. 3. "When You Look Good, You Feel Good" Yep, the oldie is pretty simple! Did you know the way you dress and the colors you wear could have an effect on your mood for the day? I feel at my best when I’m in a blazer, a skirt or a dress - with heels of course. It’s just something about those things that I do that makes me feel more confident, and walk with a little more swag. That dress that hugs your curves in all the right places, that heel that gives your butt that extra lift, and not to mention that jumpsuit that makes you feel like you can take over the world. Whatever it may be that gives you that boost, go for it! Own your personal style. Until next time, xoxo Petite Latoya, Fashion and Empowerment Blogger iampetitelatoya.com PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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20 • WOMAN TO WOMAN WITH JOANNE: THE MAGAZINE • May 2017
In Memoriam:
Helen Ruth Sandifer
Since August of last year (2016), I have been experiencing my series of firsts without you - your birthday on October 31st, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s. But the hardest one was on my birthday when I didn’t get my birthday call from you. It just wasn’t a complete birthday. I couldn’t figure out why I felt so sad, but it was because I didn’t get my call. I wish I could hear your voice once more. I miss you so much. I know you are better now and life will go on - I just wish we could still share it with you here. As life moves on, my next first without you will be Mother’s Day. I don’t dread it - I look forward to celebrating all of the wonderful memories you left behind. All the laughs and trying to kick that little short leg up. You were awesome and I wish I had told you that more often. I love you, Mom, and I miss you. Rest well.
I am your second-born son and I miss you so much. I will always love you and I wish you were here, but I know you are watching over us.
Sam
Thank you for being my mountain top and my valley in the time of need, my sane head when needed and I love you. Keep watching over us.
Eunice
Joanne
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Ineva May Pittman
Woman to Woman with Joanne: The Magazine had the pleasure of sitting down with Mrs. Ineva May Pittman, and it was a true privilege to be able to do so. Mrs. Ineva May Pittman was born in Jayess, Mississippi. Her mom raised five children, three girls and two boys, after her father passed away when she was 10 years old. Mrs. Pittman attended Elliot Elementary and Shady Grove Elementary School in Jackson, Mississippi and graduated from Lanier High School. In 1956, she attended Christ Missionary & Industrial College and received a Bachelor of Science degree in elementary education. She also received a Master of Science degree in education and supervision from Jackson State University in 1973. She also attended the University of Alabama, Southern University, Belhaven College and Mississippi Baptist Seminary. Mrs. Pittman was responsible for helping people register to vote during the Civil Rights Movement. She was a member of a women’s group called Medgar Wiley Evers’ Ladies Auxiliary. They provided food and housing for the civil rights workers. They also provided clothes for the children who were integrating the school systems. Under the leadership of Jane Schutt, she was able to travel to New York and sit in on one of the United Nations meetings while under the leadership of U Thant. There were people from all nations there speaking in their native languages. This was an experience she will never forget. Mrs. Pittman is proud to say that she patronizes black owned businesses and she doesn’t shop outside of Jackson, Mississippi unless she is visiting out of town. She supports Chokwe Lumumba for mayor of the City of Jackson, and some of her
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favorite restaurants are Fred’s Soul Food, Mama’s Eats and Sweets, and Bully’s Restaurant. Mrs. Pittman taught elementary school in the Jackson Public School System for more than 30 years at Isable Elementary School. She is a member of New Hope Baptist Church, the National Council of Negro Women, the Jackson State University National Alumni Association, the State Democratic Executive Committee for eight years and the Garden Club Council. Some of her recognitions are: Jackson Advocate Woman of the Year (2012), Honorary Hinds County Deputy, under the leadership of Tyrone Lewis (2014), City Usher Ministry Dedicated Service Award (1989), Black Women of Political Action (1989), Jackson Association of Educators (1987), Jackson Public Schools Distinguished Service Award (1986), National Council of Negro Women Dedicated Service Award (1984), Jackson Section NCNW Finer Womanhood Award (1978), Jackson Branch NAACP John H. Dixon Outstanding Community Service Award (1977, 1978) and Personality of the South Publication. Most recently, in March of 2017, Poindexter Park in Jackson, Mississippi was renamed after her the become Ineva May-Pittman Park. Mrs. Pittman has one son, Albert Pittman, and one grandson.
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IMAGE COURTESY OF CITY OF JACKSON
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Arnetta Oscar We count it an honor to celebrate the pillar of our family. She is our rock, queen, life of the party, a listening ear, fashionista and best friend. She has instilled within us the core values of respect, honor and family. Arnetta Oscar was born into a large family of six sisters and four brothers. She herself had a large family, four boys and five girls whom she raised alone, with help from the good Lord. At 89 years young, she is our own personal living legend. We can sit and talk with her on any given day and partake in real live history lessons. One of the stories we can count on her telling is how she use to make clothing for all her nine head of children as she loving refers to them. She also made clothing for people in the community, which she eventually turned into a business to provide for her family. She was very good at creating resources to make sure her children had what they needed. In doing so she instilled an entrepreneur mentality within all of us. One of the most important things that she treasures in life is her family. No family is greater in her eyes. She’s a survivor of many of life’s challenges, great and small. We are so blessed to have her in our lives as a shining example of perseverance, confidence, good work ethics, faith, beauty and class. Arnetta Oscar, we love you to life! Happy Mother’s Day! - Hosea Oscar and Family
h t g G i r r eenwood W e i z O . r D “Once a task has begun, never leave it until it is done. Be the labor great or small, do it well or not at all.” This is the one poem my mother made me learn as a child and it has singularly shaped my life. I remember watching her as a child work two and sometimes three jobs to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. She taught me a work ethic, and that ethic has been one of the greatest gifts she could have ever instilled in me. Growing up in Yazoo City during the ‘80s, the drug explosion presented the challenges of fast money, violence, and a dysfunctionalism that we had never seen before. Couple that with a young man transitioning through adolescence, and you have a recipe for disaster. This would be a nightmare to most, but not my mother. Ozie Wright-Greenwood is the strongest woman I have ever encountered. Her relentless commitment to keep our small tribe together is one of her greatest attributes and greatest accomplishments. All that I am and all that I ever will be is because this woman refused to give up! And for that, my sister Toni and I say, we love you and thank you, Momma! - Maximus Wright and Toni Young
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Cindy F. Long A Mother’s Love A mother is always there when you need her most She’s always there to love us and keep us warm and close She wipes our tears and makes sure everything is alright She read us bedtime stories and tucked us in at night She is nurturing, caring, and loving too She makes all your days turn bright from blue She is always there to give a hug and try to make us smile She treats us with respect and love she treats us like her child She surprises us with gifts of love She is more like an angel sent from above She gives us love and tender care It warms our hearts just to know you are there Her love is so special and she gives so free
Only a heart as warm as yours would give unselfishly Even though we may not praise all that you do We are very appreciative to have a mother like you For all the times you picked us up when we felt down And made sure our little faces hardly ever wore a frown You have guided us the best you can you taught us like no other And we're thankful we're the lucky ones who get to call you mother Mom, you are truly special in each and every way So we wanted to do something special to say "Happy Mother’s Day." We love you, RaShida and AJ
Dorothy R. Bronson “A Mother’s Love” By Kenneth Scott This is a true story about real people involved in a real situation in this real world. I pray that after you have read this testimony or hear it being read aloud, it will touch your heart and cause you to look back over your past life and see the goodness of God. My mother is the glue that holds our family together. She can be stern, she is graceful, she is kind and tenderhearted and loving. She loves JESUS for loving her. I wanted to share a part of her story to encourage someone else who may be facing the same thing that she has conquered: When she was 22 years old, she was raped and impregnated by her uncle. This was a very traumatic time in her life. Only by the grace of God was she able to grow past this trauma that had occurred. She had all types of thoughts racing through her mind: revenge, murder, abortion, even suicide. As she was telling me the story of the most difficult time in her life, I felt the pain, brokenness and loneliness that she experienced during her young life. I can only imagine the shame and disgrace she had to bear because of someone else’s wrong choices. She made the decision to FORGIVE the one who brought about so much pain, disappointment and adversity and she decided to keep the baby as well. How many of
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us would have been able to forgive and keep the unborn child. This situation made her pray and put her trust in JESUS. I have learned this one thing: If something in your life makes you pray, it cannot be all that bad. Just because the pregnancy may be undesirable and may not be what you want, give the child a hope and a future, most of all give the child some love. The children did not commit the act or deed. Don’t take your pain and frustration out on the child. Give that child to GOD - give him or her a fighting chance. She promised herself and GOD that she would give this unwanted unborn child something that her uncle who raped her could not and did not give her, and that my friend is LOVE. GOD is LOVE. Love covers a multitude of sin and faults. If we can forgive others GOD our heavenly father will forgive us. She is now 73 years old and I am that child that my mother did not throw away because of the way I was conceived. I am 49 years of age, a husband, father, grandfather and still a thankful son. The Lord saved me and sent me to my mother to save her. Because she was willing to give me a natural life, He gave her eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Dorothy R. Bronson is her name and she is very dear and precious to me.
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Edna Rae Davis Auntie Edna, my sunshine on a rainy day. In her life, she has endured many storms. She is a domestic violence survivor, and many years ago she was diagnosed with glaucoma and lost 80 percent of her vision. She has a heart of gold, and her smile will light up a large room. She is my voice of reason, a shoulder to cry on and she gives good hugs. My mom, her older sister, died in 1969 when I was only four years old, and I know God placed me in a position to shower Auntie Edna with the love and compassion that I missed out on with my own mom. Love you, Auntie Edna. You are the wind beneath my wings and I thank God for you. Happy Mother's Day. LaTonia Wilson-Brown
Elsa L. Hardy Elsa L. Hardy, 58, of Crystal Springs, Mississippi Submitted by Ramona A. Bridges Elsa, a God-fearing, selfless, strong woman; Whose love and compassion is always available. Her devotion is uninterrupted and her wisdom is treasured. God made a wonderful mother, a mother who never grows old; He made your smile of the sunshine, and molded your heart of pure gold. In your eyes He placed bright shining stars, and in your cheeks, roses. God made a wonderful mother, and gave that dear mother to us. Your love and loyalty, is a blueprint that will forever be etched in our hearts. We thank God for you each and every day. May His peace and blessings continue to follow you in each and every way. We love you... Ramona, Kizzie, Mydra, Corey and Kara
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Melba Peters Melba Peters...My mother...I just want to take the time to say how much I love and appreciate you. At a very young tender, innocent age, I showed up on the scene and shifted your entire life. I held up all your dreams and aspirations and caused you lot of pain, but you managed to embrace and accept that God used you to transport me here. You were my first teacher and the woman who guided me into becoming the woman of God that I am today. You have been a great example of how to wear many hats: how to run a household as a mother, wife, woman of God and how to maintain your sanity, while working in corporate America. You stood firm in many areas and did not ease up once. You knew how to measure out what I needed when I needed it. Words cannot express what an honor it is to not just be your daughter, but to be the first born! I love you, Mom, and I look forward to the day that we take multiple cruises kicking back enjoying life and life more abundantly. Darnisha Ramsey-James
Apostle Michelle King Spiritual Mother....Apostle Michelle King I bless God for you! Having a spiritual mother is so rewarding! I'm so blessed to have someone in my life who can hear my cries in the Spirit, and know when to embrace and when to refrain from embracing. Thanks for allowing God to use you to be my Moses to lead me out of the things I didn't even know I was entangled in. God has used you to pull out what He has placed inside of me and it hasn't been easy, but it sure has been worth the while. I love you, woman of God...see you at the top! Darnisha Ramsey-James
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Bobbie Fairley Shea Fairley by Al’Lashea Wallace Magnanimous. Obliging. Majestic. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised (Proverbs 31:26-30) Love, your children: Alfongelia, Altonyala, Algernon, and Albershaun
Susie B. Stewart There is nothing more powerful in this world than a mother's love. I thank God for allowing me to experience that love through my mother, Susie B. Stewart. I just want to thank God for blessing me with a funny, beautiful, and caring mother. Thank you for all the sacrifices you have made. I truly appreciate how you always find a way to be there when I need you the most in spite of your fussing. LOL! Thank you for your teachings, and thank you for teaching me how to dance in the rain and how to laugh when life tries to find a way to steal your smile. Thank you for teaching me how to care for and nurture those who need it the most. Proverbs 22:6 says, "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old, they will not turn from it." May God continue to bless you as you continue to be a blessing to others. Love, Salmeilia Stewart
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Overcomers W
hat does it take to be an overcomer? As children of God, it is our birthright to be overcomers. We don't have to hope to overcome; we don't have to fight to overcome... In the place of trying to get a victory, we fight from the place of victory! Still, God laid this topic on my heart to study and to find out what it really means to overcome. To overcome lends itself to the thought that there was some obstacle, some problem or some difficulty in the way - something in our lives that we need to beat, destroy, leave or master. Recently, I have had the Holy Spirit prompt me to look up the meaning of words. When words are commonly used, we just assume that we understand them, but the truth is we rarely know the complete meaning of a word...even a word as simple as overcoming. To ensure that we all will work from the same premise, the definition is as follows: to succeed in dealing with a problem, difficulty, or
BY MICHELLE MYRICKS defeating an opponent. In the Greek, it means I conquer, I am victorious and I prevail. My favorite definition of overcome is to overpower. When something in your life weighs you down, you have to know as a Christian that there is a greater power living inside of us to help us - to overpower the pressure that is attempting to bind us. Jesus said, “Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world.” That is a familiar scripture and very powerful. Yet, we have somehow allowed familiarity to turn it into a religious cliché. We as Christians should never minimize the power of God's Word. The Bible is a Living Word, and we should not store a Biblical truth like historical facts. Instead, we should allow them to come into our lives by meditating on them. Christians should get into God's presence so His presence can come in to us. John 1:1 reads, “In the beginning was the Word, the Word was with
God, the Word was God, and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.” The Word is still living and tangible, especially when you can trust God to bring it to pass in your own life. Be a conqueror. Be an overcomer. God wants us to shift our mindset about the His Word. Believe that you can have all the promises of God. Believe that the promises are part of a legal document between you and our Father. You see, Jesus stood in the courts of Heaven, and then died on the cross to pay our ransom. He traded His life for our life. Not just for our salvation, he expects you to give your life to Him...He gave his life for us. When we truly get this in our spirit...oh, what an awesome exchange the cross will truly be! Because of the Cross, we are instantly a part of a royal family, the family of God. Let's be overcomers - let the power of God overpower defeat, prevail and master anything that is defeating or blocking you.
PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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Blackened Catfish with Cajun Butter Sauce BY CHEF NATE COLEMAN
You'll need: 2 Mississippi farm-raised catfish filets 4 oz. unsalted butter 1 cup heavy cream 2 cups white rice 8 oz. raw spinach Blackening Seasoning 1 tbsp. paprika 1 tbsp. garlic powder 1 tbsp. onion powder 1 tbsp. ground thyme 1 tsp. black pepper 1 tsp. cayenne pepper 1 tsp. dried basil Place blackening seasoning ingredients in a bowl and mix thoroughly and set aside. Cook 2 cups of white rice in rice cooker or on stove top as directed, then set aside. In a non-stick skillet over medium heat melt 2 oz. of butter. Season 2 boneless, skinless catfish filets liberally with blackening seasoning then place in hot skillet and cook until done. Remove filets from the pan and reduce heat, and then add the spinach to the same pan and cook until the spinach is lightly wilted. To make the sauce, in a separate saucepan, melt 4 oz. of butter over low heat, and then add the heavy cream. Bring contents to a low simmer, stirring constantly. To this pot, add 2 tbsp. of the blackening seasoning and stir until fully incorporated. Set the sauce aside. To plate, place 2 heaping spoonfuls of the white rice in the center of the plate, top with catfish and place a bit of the lightly cooked spinach on top. Drizzle the catfish and the plate lightly with the Cajun butter sauce.
BACKGROUND PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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Replenish to Empty, Empty to Replenish: Our Cycle of Strength, Endurance & Happiness
BY ROIKENSHA CRAIG “When women take care of their health, they become their own best friend.” - Maya Angelou “It's not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself and to make your happiness a priority. It's necessary.” - Mandy Hale “She looks well to the ways of her household...” Proverbs 31:27 “...whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” Proverbs 11:25b
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he Bible reminds us in Proverbs 14:1 that “a wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands." As women, we are faced with many challenges, numerous responsibilities and multiple decisions that have a significant impact on the lives of our husband, children and overall, our home. It is important for us to embrace God's calling for us to be wise women in order to impact our homes abundantly, as a result of our choices. We must ask ourselves the tough questions: "What do I want for me?" "Do I want to build myself up?" or "Do I want to tear myself down?" As I stated earlier, many times our decisions have a significant impact on the lives of our home. So in theory, what we are really asking ourselves is, "Do I want to tear down my home?" or "Do I want to build my home?" It is crucial that we are wise and take the necessary time to build and embed strong threads of happiness, self-love, resilience and serenity within us. Loving one’s self is not selfish. Self-love is loving yourself enough to live a healthy and productive life in order to impact those around you positively, effectively and intentionally. “A foolish woman, however, tears down with her own hand whatever home life she has...Unfortunately, our words, neglect, laziness, anger, and lack of self-control can, day by and little by little, tear down and destroy a home and family” (George, 2017). Let us not be foolish to neglect our bodies, neglect our husband, neglect our children, neglect our beauty, neglect our emotional health and phys-
ical health. When we do this, we are tearing down our life, which will have a significant impact on our husband, children, career and ultimately, our home. So in theory, not only are we tearing our life down, but the life of our family and possibly the life of our career. In biology, the mitochondria are considered the powerhouse of a cell. “They are organelles that act like a digestive system which takes in nutrients, breaks them down, and creates energy rich molecules for the cell” (www.biology4kids. com). “Mitochondria are fascinating structures that create energy to run the cell” (www.nature.com). Likewise, I believe women are the powerhouse of our families. Therefore, in order to be “the powerhouse” of our families, it is crucial that we allow two particular seasons to be active in our lives. These seasons can be called a time of replenishing and a time of emptying. When we replenish, we build, we gird our loins, and we increase longevity and happiness. Proverbs 31:17 reminds us, “She girds her loins with strength, and strengthens her arms.” To gird means to prepare oneself for action and for something requiring strength or endurance. During our times of replenishing, we are essentially preparing ourselves for an action that definitely requires strength and endurance...the act of giving in our role as wife, mother, employer or employee. Replenishing should be scheduled as a priority and on a consistent schedule. On any given day, we as mothers, stepmothers, foster-mothers, wives, single moms, adopted moms, grandmothers and working moms, give of ourselves relentlessly. We provide the necessary energy to manage, to produce and to enhance the function of our family. How will you replenish after you have emptied out into your husband, your children, your career and ultimately, your home? Will you choose to be wise in order to build yourself? When we empty, we prune the unhealthy, we eliminate waste and/or residue we have consumed while giving ourselves to others, and we rid our-
selves of the negative factors that are unproductive and conducive of idleness. Waste is simply the little afterthoughts that go through our mind, continuously causing us to worry or fret over a decision we made. Waste is also the unintentional consequences, negative reactions from those we encounter and unfinished business. Negative factors can be habits, environments or people. Again, Proverbs 31:27 reminds us, “She looks well to the ways of her household and eats not the bread of idleness.” In other words, we rid ourselves of things that decrease or depress our physical, emotional, social and cognitive being. A time of emptying is mandatory! It allows us to refocus, reinvigorate and realign ourselves to God's will, and our personal or family vision and goals. Emptying allows us time to sit in the quiet and in the presence of the Almighty, to face our current reality and state of being. The emptying process enables us to experience a new replenishing instead of recycling our previous time of replenishing. This is a continuous cycle...replenish to empty and empty to replenish. This allows us to provide gifts of happiness, peace, stability and wisdom to ourselves, to our husbands, to our children, to our career and ultimately, our home. From the moment of conception, God ordained who we would be in this life. He ordained every child we were allowed to conceive and birth into this world. I am reminded of one of my favorite scriptures: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). His plans are to prosper us. This includes us making time to replenish ourselves so that we may thrive in order to be the mitochondria of our homes. It also includes emptying the old, so that we are not filled with toxic waste. Take time to sit down and map out your schedule for emptying and replenishing you...taking care of you. It. Is. A. Necessity. For. Our. Strength. Endurance. And. Happiness. Until next time, love yourself! PHOTO CREDIT: GRAPHICSTOCK
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