Woman's Essence Magazine February 2013

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Publisher Adryana Nicoleta

editors Allyson Deese Deanna Proach Angela McClain

Contributing writers Diana Vanbrabant Caitlyn - FIDM Chad Tackett Aaron

Contributing Websites www.2013-valentinesday.com www.cupcakeninja.net

Design

Grafx Passion www.grafxpasion.wordpress.com grafxpasion@gmail.com

photography In The Moment Portraiture www.nthemoment.com www.gettyimages.com

Follow WEmag on Twitter! www.twitter.com/WomansEssence Find us on facebook! www.facebook.com/womans.essence

Woman’s Essence Magazine womans.essence.magazine@gmail.com issuu.com/womans-essence-magazine/docs

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CONTENTS February 2013

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Business & Career

How to speak in public : The 5 Golden Rules

12 Fashion Trends Outfits for Valentine’s Day

16 Cover Story -Special Happy Valentine’s Day - Valentines Ideas & Gifts

26 Health & Fitness How to choose a health club

28 Love & Relationships 46 Relationships: Valentine’s Day 2013 Ideas - What to do for Valentines Day

32 Food & Drinks

Special Recipe - Chocolate hearts Sandwich Cookies

34 Partners & Sponsors

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Cover S to r y

Cover Story

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happy Valentines Day

Valentines Ideas & Gifts

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Business & Career

How to Speak in Public The 5 Golden Rules

by Diana Vanbrabant

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For many people, speaking in public is up at the top of their list of worst fears. This is nothing unusual – even very experienced speakers still feel nervous or anxious at times. When we know we have to make a presentation, our first thoughts may be “Will I be nervous? What will I sound like? What will they think of me?” First of all, remember it’s not bad to be nervous – the adrenalin can keep you on your toes and make sure you give the best of yourself. The importance of making a successful presentation is not to do with whether you are going to win an Oscar for your glowing public performance. The aim is to achieve the goal you have set yourself. Think about why you are making the presentation – it’s not just to test your presentation skills! 8

What is your goal? What do you want the outcome of your presentation to be? The time and energy you put into your presentation are an investment – and before you start investing you must know what you want your return to be! Funnily enough whenever I ask at the start of my presentation skills courses “what is your goal?” most of my students will say “just to get it over and done with as quickly as possible!” or “talk as quickly as I can and finish my presentation so people stop staring at me!” This is understandable, but it’s not the kind of goal I like to hear.


So what is a good goal? Here are a few: • Making sure my prospects know exactly what services we can provide • Communicating clearly what I can do for my clients • Presenting in a logical way why they should choose me and not my competitor • Presenting the upcoming restructuring in a comprehensive and reassuring way to my employees • Selling a new business idea to my colleagues It all starts with your preparation; you can break your preparation questions down to three simple steps: • Where am I now? • Where do I want to be? • How can my presentation help me to get there? To get what you want, give them what they want

When you are clear about what you want to achieve with your presentation, the next step is to figure out how this particular audience can move you towards your goal. For this you have to know who is in your audience, where they come from, their background, and why they are here today listening to you. In other words: What’s in it for your audience? What is their motivation? Think about who will be listening to you, why they are listening – what information they want to hear from you and in what form they want to hear it. What will my roIe be? Helen had recently begun leading a new project, and was working with a new team. At the first team meeting Helen gave a presentation to her team members explaining what the new project was all about. She explained what would be achieved, and how it would fit in with the overall strategy and goals of the company. She went on to explain the role of each of the team members, and finished with the details of the timeline they would set in order to complete the project by the required date. Helen’s team members were enthusiastic, and Helen was pleased with her presentation. She had achieved her goal of motivating the members of her team to get the project going. Team motivation was her role.

Helen didn’t focus enough on what she wanted to get out of the presentation with the directors. The directors were a completely different audience from the team members; and what was in it for them was completely different. Helen thought that she should give them accurate details and a full picture of the project. She told them who would be doing what task, and how the timeline was planned to meet the deadline. She presented in a very clear and confident way, and kept to the time allocated to her. But this was not what the directors wanted to hear. Helen didn’t tell them about the benefits the company would gain by allocating more money to the project. She didn’t tell them what was in it for them. She didn’t prepare this particular role very well. Know your audience

So, one of the key success points is to know your audience. Do your homework! Find out who they are, where they come from, why they are here and what they are looking for. Make yourself a simple checklist: • Find out as much as you can about the group in advance • Learn your audience’s names and use them if possible • Anticipate potential problems and your responses to them • Practise responses to tough questions • Remember that if there is a mix of cultures you need to use your intercultural sensitivities • Understand the motivation of your audience. People will only listen to you if there is something in it for them! And when you know who they are and why they are there: Give them what they want

The following week, Helen’s boss came to her to tell her that the company directors were reallocating some of the company budget, and he wanted to try to get some extra budget allocated to their project. He asked Helen to attend a meeting of the directors so that she could make a presentation to them explaining the details of the project. “Good” thought Helen, “I’ve just made a very successful presentation about the project. I’ll use that to present to the directors”. The presentation seemed to go well, and Helen felt confident because she had been through it before. The directors were interested, asked questions, and seemed encouraging to Helen. But afterwards, Helen and her boss were disappointed; they didn’t get the extra budget they were hoping for. Where did Helen do wrong? What should she have done differently? 9


Here are some of the questions you can ask yourself before you start: • What is the most important information for my audience? • Prioritise your information according to their priorities – making sure that you also include everything you need for your own goals • How will I communicate my message so it is understood by everybody in the room? Put yourself in their place as they listen to what you are saying. What stories/facts are interesting for the attendees?

Keep your presentation lively by including new information or facts – maybe something you have just read in the newspaper. Knowledge on a subject which is not new to you can be new to your audience – and perhaps you possess experience which your public does not have

My top five tips for a good presentation:

And once you have started your presentation, remember to gauge the atmosphere in the room, keep your focus on the audience, and use plenty of eye contact. Give them what they want and you are halfway to getting what you want! Throughout the many years I have conducted presentation skills training programmes, I have seen people evolve from being very nervous at the start to being confident and actually enjoying themselves in the end. This convinces me that it’s possible to learn to be a good presenter and that practice and motivation are key elements in this learning curve. Next time we will find out more about structure and language during your presentation.

1. Understand that nerves are normal and most of us have them. Use your adrenaline to channel your energy in the right way. The right amount of positive adrenaline will give you the right amount of energy to look and sound convincing. 2. Know what you want to achieve at the end of your presentation. Be very clear in your mind what your goal is! 3. Be prepared so you can give your audience what they want; what’s in it for them to listen to you? The predominant thought of every human being is WIIFM. 4. Know your role! The clearer you are about the role, the clearer your audience will be. 5. Know your audience. An excellent presenter will always make sure it’s “all about his audience” and not “all about him”.

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Fashion Trends

Outfits for Valentine’s Day by Caitlyn - FIDM

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alentine’s Day: You like it, or you don’t. We always like to take V a positive approach to the holiday. Valentine’s isn’t just about

having a significant other, it’s a time to celebrate all of the love in your life – friends, family, and pets included!

However, another big reason why we love Valentine’s Day is that it gives us another excuse to dress up. And contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to wear a frilly, baby pink dress to look festive on V-Day. (Though, if you want to, more power to you!) To help get you started, we have created four looks for different Valentine’s Day events.

Brunch with Friends If you and your girlfriends are headed out for a long, lazy brunch on V-Day, choose a dainty, feminine dress with colorful touches. Glam up the look beyond your normal brunch-wear with pretty earrings and pointy-toe flats

Cooking at Home Just because you and your significant other have decided to stay home and cook does not mean you should wear your normal around-the-house sweats. A cute metallic skirt, sexy T-strap pumps, and a bold necklace will dress up a colorful long-sleeve tee (that won’t be ruined by a marinara sauce spill!). 13


Traditional Formal Dinner If you’re taking the traditional route of candlelit dinner with that special someone, opt for a nice dress. This one looks very expensive without the spendy pricetag. Dainty jewelry, statement shoes, and a clutch are all key accessories.

Valentine’s Party Whether you and your girlfriends are planning a girl’s party or you’re headed out to a singles event, a flirty lace dress with a high-low hemline is a perfect choice. And what better time than V-Day to wear your most obnoxious (read: darling) bow belt and pumps?

What are you wearing this Valentine’s Day?

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Cover Story

Happy Valentines Day Valentines Ideas & Gifts

Photography by In The Moment Portraiture 16


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www.2013-valentinesday.com

Valentines Day - History and Facts Valentines Day is celebrated on February 14th every year. We all plan to enjoy the day with our friends, family members, or with the special one of our life. There are plenty of idea how this can be spent and we plan all different to get the best of the day. Some of us plan for a party, some of us take our special 18

friends for a long drive or some arrange for a candle light dinner at night. The occasion can be celebrated in different ways as per personal discretion; however, we pay our respect and show our love and sincere concern for our valentines with our plans and arrangements.


This day is celebrated all over the world with a merry and boisterous mood that celebrates the spirit of the day. The spirit of Valentine’s Day is of love, trust, and friendship. We pamper and spend some good moments with our valentines who are part of our hearts. As the day is related to love and commitment to love, the planning of the day is often found associated to love and celebration of lovely relationship etc. There is no hard and fast rule about celebration of this day; however, we treat the day as special day and a tribute to love, respect, and commitment to loyalty and friendship. According to history, Saint Valentine was an ancient saint who was detained for executing outlawed marriages of soldiers and for curing distressed Christians dwelling in Roman Empire. Some other stories also reports that, once the jailor’s daughter came to visit Saint Valentine while he was in the jail. After seeing that beautiful girl, Valentine felt his love for her jailor’s daughter and he sent his first “Valentine” massage to her. Before he died, he wrote a letter in the name of the jailor’s daughter and signed as “From your Valentine” and that introduced the custom of calling the lover as Valentine, which is still maintained all over the world. Valentine’s Day is mostly celebrated between teenagers however; adults are not spared from the frenzy of this lover day. Trivia of Valentines Day -- Pope Gelasius declared 14th February as Valentine’s Day and he announced the day on the end of 5th century. -- Several surveys have claimed that the sale of Contraceptives Condoms & are any-time higher on Valentine’s Day and that makes clear that lovers are not exchange flowers and vows. -- It is believed that a Valentine’s Day- kiss brings great luck throughout the year. -- It has been observed that our Teacher’s receive maximum numbers of Valentine’s Day cards and greetings on Valentine’s Day although after age 13 the gifts are mostly shared with special friends. -- Roses are mostly given on Valentine’s Day, for example, Red Roses stand for Love, Yellow Roses are meant for honoring Friendship, Pink Roses calls Sweetheart, etc. Besides, Red Carnations are

emblem of admiration and white rose are considered a token for Pure Love. -- The world’s biggest Valentine’s Day chocolate was cooked in Switzerland on 14th February 2011. That special chocolate was 18.35 m long and it was made with total 1500 red-white chocolates.

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Celebrate love on this valentines day with the best Valentines Pictures, Valentine Messages, Valentines Ideas, Valentines Quotes, Valentine’s Day Gifts, Cards and Unique Valentine Gifts Ideas.

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How To Propose Your Girlfriend on Valentines Day Valentine’s Day is not only for spending some Based on the mood, you can choose to cozy moments with your beloved. Lovers, who propose in a serene place or in a crowhave been dating each other for quite some time, ded place. can use this occasion to propose.

Will you be my Valentine ?

Some people use home or riverside to propose to their loved ones. If you prefer privacy and serenity, chose a park that is not crowded or use the balcony of your house when you are enjoying the company over a cup of coffee. However, if you want to propose at other places, a restaurant would fit the bill. You can instruct waiters to serve you champagne or wine. It is a classic technique to place the ring at the bottom of a glass before it is served! You can also propose to your loved one when you dine at home on the special day.

Alternatively, you can place the ring for your beloved inside a candy box. Imagine the kind of surprise she will get when opening the box. For adding to the surprise factor, you can place the ring or proposal card at the bottom of the box. You can spring the surprise to your beloved at the most unexpected moment for the effect! Of course, you need to think of his or her likings before you propose. You can be a little more romantic in your approach and propose her while you watch a romantic movie with the person.

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How To Surprise Your Boyfriend On Valentine’s Day While everyone wants to spend this special day in close company of his or her beloved, you can use Valentine’s Day to throw a nice surprise to your beloved. However, before you plan the surprise element, it is important that you know things that he or she likes and dislikes. If your partner is fond of Mils and Boons series, it would be a great idea to send him a special love letter or proposal in a bottle. You can also select a nice love poem.

You can also choose to send a gift basket to your beloved on the morning of this special day. Imagine the surprise he or she will get when the gift basket is delivered right in the morning. You can send flowers chocolates and any other gift that you know he or she will like. Perfume and aromatic gifts can also be sent. You also take your beloved on Valentine’s Day to a surprise outing trip. It would be to a serene place in lap of nature in outskirts of town.

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Candlelight dinners or treat at restaurant are passé but an unexpected treat can please your partner for sure. While this may not exactly be surprising, you can propose to your love done on this day. It could be done at riverside or in a restaurant. You have to do it at an unexpected moment that can catch him or her off guard! You can propose her with a ring as well.


Gifts to surprise your valentine: Valentine Gift Ideas Gifts are integral part of celebration, so is of Valentine’s Day gift. Here lovers and friends exchange gift to commemorate the memory of the day and to cherish the lovely association forever via the memento. Therefore before planning Valentine Day gift ideas, we must remember the spirit of the day, its sweet flavor, and the fragrance of honesty and loyalty associated with the day. There is no custom pan for Valentine Gifts; however, we have mentioned a few simple but innovative gift ideas for him and her.

Valentine Gifts For Him

Valentine Gifts For Her

Gift him a sweater it will make him remembered of your love and ardent passion. You can gift him a perfume it will be a grand gift as he will always remember the fragrances associated with your presence. Gift him a bracelet with heart sign: whenever he will wear it in his hand he will cherish your relationship. You can gift him a membership card of his favorite sports club: he will readily understand that you love to share his world.

Gift her lovely scarf and request her wear it whenever she will feel cold. She will feel the warmth of your love. Gift you fiancĂŠ a simple but good quality diamond-ring and claim that your love and trust for her is stronger than diamond. She will remember the compliment till last breathe of her life. Take her to your home and get her introduced with your parents and family members; let her understand that you have accepted here as one close to your heart and life.

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LovepickedIsfrom. Facebook . . fans Love is EVERYTHING! Ayo Sasha Boo

Love is giving your all and never looking back Alesha Escobar

An intense feeling of deep affection Chidi Roscoe II

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Love is a feeling you have for someone even at their worst Yolanda Scott

Unspeakable bliss. Julie GraphicDesigner Holloway

Being beyond happy that you’re a parent! Madeline Franklin

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Health & Fitness

How to Choose

a Health Club by Chad Tackett

When shopping for health clubs consider the following: • Location

For your fitness program to be a success, exerci-sing has to be convenient or it won’t become a realistic lifestyle change. The closer and easier it is to get to (and park your car), the better. Of course, you don’t want to join a health club that doesn’t suit you just because it’s close to your home or office, but if you’re joining a health club that isn’t convenient to get to, you’re a lot more likely to find an excuse to stop going.

• Try Before You Buy

Sales staff are very good at selling the many benefits of their health club, but you need to spend some time trying the equipment and “feeling” the atmosphere. Ask for a day pass or trial mem-

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bership--health clubs have nothing to loose and everything to gain by this. Be sure to try out the club at the time that you would normally workout--you’ll get a better feel for how crowded it is. Notice if there is much of a wait for equipment, how helpful the staff is, and if the equipment is well maintained. You may even ask a few members what they like about the club.

• Make Sure They Have What You Want

Make a list of the things that are important to you, such as personal training, childcare, aerobics classes, etc., and make sure the health club has what you need. If classes help to motivate you and the health club doesn’t offer the classes you need, sticking with your exercise program won’t be realistic. Try the class and make sure it is en-


joyable, challenging and educational. Just the same, if you have children, make sure the health club has childcare or it will be tough to make it to the club.

• Member Profile

Find out what the members are like; see if the atmosphere is comfortable. If you’re a beginner, some clubs may be intimidating. Select a club where you feel comfortable and welcome.

• Staff

Make sure there is always someone available to answer your questions, to show you a new exercise, or how to use a piece of equipment. Are they friendly, helpful and knowledgeable?

• Costs and Contracts

Find out exactly what the membership fee includes; personal training, classes, pool, towel service, lockers, childcare, etc. Are there extra costs for additional services? This should play a big part in your decision to join a certain health club. Some health clubs have a one-time initiation fee and require purchasing a minimum of three months up front. Depending on your budget, you may want to find a club that allows you to go on a month-to-month basis. In addition, find out if the health club debits the funds directly out of your Visa or checking account. This can make it easier to pay membership fees but make sure that it’s easy to cancel if you decide you don’t like the club. Be sure you read the contract before you sign so you’re not “locked” into paying even if you move out of town or change health clubs. Also, have a clear idea of what you can afford to pay and stick to your budget no matter what sales incentives are offered. And don’t be afraid to bargain. If they’re asking $49 a month and all you can afford is $39, offer $39 (if they’ve met previous criteria) and let them know you’re prepared to join then and there. Health clubs vary greatly, not only in services and equipment available but also in pricing structure. Many join a health club with great intentions and then windup unhappy and dissatisfied. Starting a health and fitness program is hard enough--don’t make it more difficult by joining a health club that doesn’t meet your needs. www.healthdiscovery.net

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Love & Relationships

Valentine’s Day 2013 Ideas - What to do for Valentines Day

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t’s that time of the year again and if you are looking for things to do for Valentine’s Day 2013, you have come to the right place as I will try to come up with as many ideas on what to do for Valentine’s Day this year. But let’s face it: Valentine’s Day is becoming more of a commercial holiday because we get to spend money on gifts and dates with our special someone. Still, it doesn’t hurt to show our special someone how much the world means to him/ her as it’s the biggest occasion where couples around you are reminded to do something special for their loved ones, and you don’t have to spend a lot to make him/ her happy. Source: www.becomegorgeous.com

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Here's the top Valentine's Day ideas this year 2013: 1. Buy him/her a gift Like duh, isn’t this a staple for Valentine’s Day? =) Well, it’s actually easier said than done as a lot of people simply have no idea what gift to give their loved ones. So if you have this kind of dilemma, check out my squidoo page about Valentine’s Day Gifts for Him 2013 and the more general Valentine’s Day 2013 Gifts. If you really want a unique gift, take a look at gift certificate offers for different kinds of activities you could do on February 14, like going on a spa, hot air balloon rides, sailing, and more.

2. Go on a Romantic Vacation I realize that this may be difficult to accomplish if either of you have work on this day because Valentine’s Day is unfortunately not a public holiday. But who says you must celebrate your love on the 14th? Again, you don’t have to spend a lot on this one. In fact, you can take advantage of a lot of deals that businesses offer this season.

www.squidoo.com

3. Look for Valentine’s Day Deals Sometimes, it is the businesses that offer deals that can actually give you an idea what to do on Valentine’s Day. Check out my squidoo page on Valentine’s Day deals 2013 which I will try to update as often as I can. There will be deals announced such as special fares, discounts on gift items and other freebies from online shopping sites.

4. Have Some Flowers Delivered This is pretty much self explanatory and we all know that flowers are one of the best sellers on February 14th (Isn’t it the best time to be a florist? =) ). Because it’s become a common thing to send flowers, you should have no problems looking for reliable flower delivery services. You can also try same day flower delivery services and pick the flowers under “love” theme. 5. Watch a Concert, Sports, Theater and other Events What better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day than to enjoy watching an event you both love? For those who are still on a “dating” stage, this is also a great way to get to know him or her well.

6. Plan a romantic dinner date Now this is something easier to accomplish than a vacation! You want to pick a restaurant that has a romantic ambiance, great service and a delicious cuisine for a perfect gastronomic experience. For a more romantic feel, you may want to book one of those romantic dinner cruises online. 31


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Food & Drinks

Chocolate Heart Sandwich Cookies

Recipe by Aaron www.cupcakeninja.net

I thought about making a traditional linzer cookie for Valentine’s Day, and then I thought a chocolate heart linzer cookie might be interesting. Somehow I started thinking about sandwich cookies and came up with this hybrid cookie. I knew I wanted to make the cookie filling pink and I wanted to leave some cookies with the plain filling showing through the top, but I also wanted to try using sprinkles as decoration in-

Ingredients for chocolate dough: 1 cup butter, room temperature 2 cups white sugar 3 eggs 3 teaspoons vanilla extract 3 cups all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking powder 1 teaspoon cinnamon 10 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

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side the cut-out portion. I bought a Valentine’s Day themed sprinkle canister so I could have a couple different sprinkle options for the cookies since I wasn’t sure what would compliment the chocolate cookie best. Turns out they all looked good! I strongly suggest you make this cookie in two days instead of one, unless you have a whole day you can devote to your cookies. Bake and decorate the tops of your cookies with chocolate drizzle the first day and complete them the next.

Method 1. Cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy, then add eggs one at a time. Add the vanilla. 2. Combine flour, cinnamon, cocoa powder and baking powder in separate bowl then add a little at a time to the batter. 3. Chill for 2 hours. I like to separte the dough into a couple different packets wrapped in waxed paper. This helps it chill faster and it is easier to handle later.

4. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. 5. Roll dough about 1/4″ I suggest placing the top part of your sandwich

cookie next to it’s bottom on the cookie sheet so you end up with the right amount of each at the end.


When your cookies are done cooling its time to get ready to decorate the tops of your sandwich cookies! I like to use disposable plastic pastry bags to melt chocolate. It’s much easier and less messy. Fill one pastry bag each of pink and white chocolate pennies. Melt the bags in 30 second intervals in your microwave. Be careful how wide you cut the tips of your bags, you can always make them wider, but not smaller. Now you’re ready to decorate! You can make up your own designs or just drizzle away! While the chocolate on your cookies is hardening, prepare your sandwich cookie filling: thick and cut with cookie cutters. Place on parchment paper lined cookie sheets. Bake for 10-12 minutes.

Ingredients for chocolate dough: 1 cup butter, room temperature 2 cups white sugar 3 eggs 3 teaspoons vanilla extract 3 cups all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking powder 1 teaspoon cinnamon 10 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

Put some of your filling in a pastry bag and line up the cookie bottoms. Pipe a line of filling around the outside edge of the cookie, leaving a 1/8″ margin. Fill in the rest of the cookie and smooth with a butter knife. Place one of your finished cookie tops on the filling and press down slightly to seal the cookie. Choose the colored sugar or sprinkle mixture of your choice and gently pat it into the cut-out opening. Tap off the extra sugar or sprinkles onto a plate. You can re-use them on another cookie. Repeat with other cookies until you are done! You can personalize your cookies with your valentine’s name or use the cookies as place settings for your Valentine’s Day dinner party.

Some other options:

1. Dip 1/2 of the top portion of your cookie in milk chocolate and add sprinkles. 2. Instead of a vanilla sandwich cookie filling make chocolate by adding some cocoa powder to the recipe. 3. Before baking your cookies sprinkle granulated sugar on top and skip the chocolate drizzle. 4. Separate your filling into a couple different bowls and make each a different color instead of using the sprinkles or sugar. These cookies can be changed seasonally by using different cookie cutters. For example, for Easter you could use a large egg cutter and cut out a small chick shape.

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