A
THE ANUSA ELECTIONS: A GUIDE FOR THE CONFUSED
The_tickets)
STOOD UP
LEFT ACTION
Stood Up is a ticket of strong, progressive and effective women seeking to improve women’s representation at a national student level. Women make up a majority of the undergraduate population, yet frequently occupy less than half of student decision-making roles. When it comes to ticket pre-selection, women are often stood up by the major tickets resulting’ in poor results at the ballot box. Issues such as safety on campus, access to education and HECS increases all have particular effects for women and we believe it is important to have equitable numbers of women bringing these concerns to NUS. The size of ANU can also mean that issues that ANU students care about aren’t raised. We are passionate ANU students and we intend to relay the concerns of ANU students to NUS. Vote for equity, diversity and fairness for national representation in 2012. Vote Stood Up!
Left Action believes that the ANU Students’ Association should promote and lead student activism. This means challenging the government, Labor or Coalition, on the issues such as the pathetic level and availability of income support for students, the racist treatment of refugees and the ban on lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex marriage rights, as well being prepared to take a stand against the university’s cuts to resources like the current proposed amalgamation of the Art and Music School Libraries. Students do not exist in a bubble separate from the rest of society. We experience the dictatorships that operate in workplaces. Most of us will end up being whitecollar workers. We are affected by the widespread sexism and racism in Australia, which not only oppress women, Muslims and Aborigines, amongst others, but also divide working people in the face of the power of employers and governments.
WOMEN’S OFFICER Renee Jones (Independent)
I would like to increase the visibility and accessibility of the collective and the women’s officer by running fortnightly stalls in Union Court and increasing the office hours for the Officer. I would like to build upon the relationship between the collectives and have more intercollective social events, like collective sport comps, film nights, cook offs and clothes swaps. I want to establish the collective within the Canberra Women’s community and start working with other women’s groups to help achieve our outcomes. I also want to run a kick ass NOWSA, with amazing speakers and workshops. I would like to start a tradition of an Annual Women’s Collective Trivia Night and I seriously believe that feminist karaoke nights should be a thing.
Raveena Toor (Activate!) As the Women’s Officer, I will take full direction from the collective. However, I would like to raise the Collective’s profile, run inclusive Collective meetings, advocate for the “Talk About It” survey, focus on women’s health issues, and ensure information sharing regarding relevant women’s services. I’m also looking forward to a successful NOWSA (women students) conference, which is being hosted by the ANU in 2012!
GOLDEN TICKET
ACTIVATE
The Golden Ticket is independent, which means no student is affiliated with any political party, this means that our decisions are not influenced by external factions. We have been hard at work creating policies that will make your life as a student better, these include supporting a National Concession Card and creating an easy to understand Taxation and Youth Allowance guide explaining the reforms. The ticket also hopes to produce guides for the rental market and living cheaply. Seeing as though the world is supposed to end in 2012 we figure ANUSA needs the most action-packed social policy possible. We are keen to implement a universal lunch hour, work closer with clubs and societies and to make out events more inclusive. The Golden Ticket is the most experienced, dedicated ticket, and our completely independent status is vital to achieving a dynamic, strong Student’s Association that fights for all students
Activate! is a progressive and experienced team committed to creating an active and inclusive campus, and representing the interests of ANU students on the SRC, in the ANU community and through the National Union of Students (NUS) in 2012. With a Student Services and Amenities Fee (SSAF) anticipated to be charged from first semester 2012 onwards, ANU students need an experienced team who will activate the ANU Students’ Association and the University administration, and work to create a better campus life. Activate! are the team that will work hard to make a real difference in the lives of students inside and outside the classroom, from advocating for a national transport concession card to increasing financial support for clubs and societies and collectives and pushing for increased funding for the counselling centre in order to reduce the current three-week waiting times Check out their policies online at: http://activateanusa.wordpress.com.
The_candidates)
STIMULATE We want to perk up your ANUSA this year and promise not to simply approach strangers in Union Court for a coffee date. As we will be asking students ‘have you been stimulated yet?” we feel the well-dressed lads and ladies of Australia’s top University deserve to know what we are on about! Stimulate is serious about student issues because we love our Uni and love everyone one of you, almost a little too much (coffee?) We believe in a better Youth Allowance system, national concession cards, affordable housing and we want both international and domestic students’ rights to constantly be improving. Stimulate wants to take ANUSA to a climax this year! We also look forward to bringing about world peace. Whilst these seem lofty goals we feel that if we fail and have only kept the Social Alternative microphones out of our association we’ve still done you a service!
DIVINE GIRAFFE OF PANCAKE This year we will overcome procrastination and our inability to harness the awesome powers of google calandar through a series of red paint splatters made with a ceiling fan and depressed History essays found on the third floor of the second hexagon of Coombs. This will ensure our likely victory in becoming your surrealist leaders for 2012, on the proviso that you utilise either your hands or feet to make scratches on a voting ballot which purge the contents of your soul but coincidentally looks like a number one next to a candidate affiliated with our party. MissionStatement: Join the luminescent children of the great Space Otter 5, and frolic with us through fields of flaming ideality. Our demands: - Canonisation of H.R. Puff ‘n’ Stuff - A harmonica in every lecture theatre - Melting every clock in ANU - Redesigning the ANUSA offices to the blueprints of M.C. Escher.
PRESIDENT
Callum Brindley (Left Action) {NB. The three candidates on Left Action provided joint answers to our questions ) I admire...the people in Egypt who made and are still making a revolution against the local police state and its close relations with US imperialism and apartheid Israel, and the tyranny of Egyptian bosses If I were Ian Young, I’d...end the ANU’s subservience to government and big business. How do you like your sausages? Sausage sizzles are often a substitute for enthusing students to act collectively in their own interests. What will you bring to the executive? Extensive experience as a political activist and a commitment to bringing about change from below, by encouraging students to take action together, rather than relying on chummy relations with the authorities.
Paddy Hutchinson (Divine Giraffe) My mother always said,,,If you find yourself cornered by the Pope, the only way to put him down for good is to drive a contraceptive through his heart while reading from Darwin’s Origin of Species. You must then twist his lid off and fill his skull with ham. Only then will the world be safe.
TREASURER
Thomas Antioch (Divine Giraffe) What’s the best movie of all time? March of the Penguins and its sequel – April of the Penguins Who is the politician you most admire? Genghis Khan, for his pioneering Carbon Tax Policy
Dallas Proctor (Golden Ticket)
If you were Ian Young, what is one thing you’d change about the ANU? I’d increase the university’s focus on undergraduate education - especially considering concerns that undergraduate degrees are being devalued because of a shift in resources to postgraduate courses.
Ruby Fitzmaurice (Stimulate) If you were Ian Young, what is one thing you’d change about the ANU? Have enough space in student accommodation.
Michael Petterson (Stimulate) What will you bring to the executive? My sense of frugality and love for karaoke nights! Seriously for a moment however, I have a passion for the inclusion of all students regardless of grouping. Along with this, my experiences in student activism on a local and national level have taught me the importance of setting tangible goals that can be achieved by a student’s association.
Fleur Hawes (Golden Ticket) What will you bring to the exec? While some may dread the thought of a President who comes from Far North Queensland, I feel my similarities to Bob Katter are exactly what ANUSA needs. I will bring to the Executive fierce passion, experience and a strong desire to both work with and make ANUSA relevant to all undergrads.I have already represented students on a number of University committees and understand what makes ANU tick. From personal experiences, as a current Fac Rep on ANUSA and a Senior Resident at UniLodge, I know the varying issues which students face on a daily basis.
SOCIAL OFFICER William Qu (Stimulate)
What will you bring to the executive? I will bring the sound and the power of the regular students on board with increased social responsibility, which I will create with spending more time with students to find out how we can help them.
Phoebe Malcolm (Golden Ticket) What will you bring to the executive? Experience running O-Week and Bush Week events and parties, a commitment to building a better more inclusive ANU community and a fabulous fancy dress wardrobe.
GENERAL SECRETARY Tara Mulholland (Golden Ticket) What will you bring to the Executive? Hopefully I’ll bring outstanding secretarial skills, lots of enthusiasm and a ton of people to ANUSA meetings (fingers crossed for quorum!).
VICE PRESIDENT
Alice McAvoy (Golden Ticket)
If I were Ian Young I would change... The cost of accommodation. A huge proportion of the ANU student population live on campus. College prices are rising at an unnecessarily steep 8% next year, and more than half of the students living on campus will be living at Unilodge, which is yet to prioritise its students’ welfare appropriately.
Avril Baker (Stimulate) What will you bring to the executive? Experience and passion for student representation. The politician I most admire is Malcolm Turnbull!
ENVIRONMENT
Sean Munro (Golden Ticket) I want to build an Environment Collective that runs so smoothly that I am redundant.
Saad Nasir (Stimulate)
Kira Scaife (Divine Giraffe) Best Movie: Care Bears, for its accurate and informative portrayal of the structure of the universe.
Michael Hiscox (Stimulate) If I were Ian Young, I’d...increase the diversity and depth of courses that ANU offers. ANU is the best university in Australia and our courses should reflect that.
EDUCATION OFFICER
Tom Barrington-Smith (Golden Ticket) I will bring a fresh perspective to the executive based on a strong knowledge of current affairs combined with a passion for creative solutions. I have dealt with university bureaucracy through my work with various clubs and societies and am aware of many of the regular pitfalls that often slow down even the most well thought out actions.
Anton Cu Unjieng (Left Action) See presidential statement
INTERNATIONAL Raymond Tan (Golden Ticket) Who is the politician you most admire? Abraham Lincoln
Mark Ka Foo Tee (Independent) Jing Li (Stimulate)
WHY WE HATE JULIA JOY BURCH LAW SCHOOL GRAFFITI LOUIE THE FLY INSIDE: CORRUPTION TORRES COSTA RICA TASUKE CAMPAIGN FUNDING PEOPLE WATCHING OLYMPICS
26 SEP 2011
Vol.63 VOLUME 63, NOno. 12 9
11 AUGUST 2011
The Australian National University Newspaper Since 1948
SEPTEMBER 11 TEN YEARS ON (p.12)
WORONI TALKS TO ASTON SHUFFLE ( P.17)
www.woroni.com.au
The day Canberra lost its innocence A survivor’s chilling account of what really happened on our 9/16 NAKUL LEGHA WRITER
It was 2AM on a cool Canberra night. I remember thinking, “it must be dark outside”. I peered out from my window and my suspicions were confirmed – indeed, it was dark. And yet, the darkness felt unfamiliar. Little did I know that with a quick chemical blast here and an exclusion zone there, this sweet country town would change forever. A loud rumbling, a quick flash and a thunderous roar. I gingerly stood up and flushed the toilet. Rising at 2AM tends to be traumatic for the bowel. As the water submissively swirled into the abyss, I heard a tremendous explosion in the distance. The windows rattled, the ground shook and I could see bright flames rising from the adjacent industrial suburb of Mitchell. It was similar to the sound of grenade blasts which can occasionally be heard from the nearby ADFA firing range. But surely ADFA boys were too busy adjusting hidden cameras in toilets to be conducting military exercises. No, this was big, something altogether different - I had been waiting for this day. I immediately jumped on Twitter. Ever since I can remember I have wanted to live tweet a major news event, peppered with factual inaccuracies and grand overstatements which could be used by established media agencies in place of wellresearched, verifiable content. But my internet connection was down. What I feared to be the total shut down of all essential infrastructure
OPINION
Fees not up, yet Contrary to last week’s frontpage headline, a decision on tariffs is not yet final. LEAH GINNIVAN ANUSA PRESIDENT
The Dark Mark appears over the skies of Canberra
eventuated to be my cat, Wally, gnawing at the Ethernet cable. He always had a thing for slender, blue cords. The numbing shock wore off when I heard the phone vibrate with the driving bassline to Beyonce’s ode to female empowerment, “Run the World (Girls)”. As many Canberrans, I’d received an emergency SMS from the ACT Emergency Services Agency advising of an “insadent” and admonishing that “resadents” in nearby suburbs remain indoors. The sender’s number was 0444 444 444, and as any self-respecting superstitious East Asian grandmother will tell you, 4 is a homonym for death. My tetraphobia combined with the
Once more with feeling: election time RICHARD KEYS NEWS SUBEDITOR
The constitutional debacle that brought about the postponement of ANUSA elections has potentially had a significant impact on their outcome and the composition of ANUSA next year. The Left Action ticket has
failure of our emergency services personnel to meet basic standards of spelling marked my breaking point. I’d watched Jodie Foster’s heroics in Panic Room enough to know shit gets real very quickly in these situations. All roads leading from my house were blocked meaning I couldn’t jump this joint. I had to bunker down. Luckily, I had a pantry stocked with a few spatchcocks, some roasted chestnuts, coconuts and cous cous. That I didn’t have the foresight to gather more emergency rations was embarrassing but I could probably put together a succulent roast spatchcock with chestnut stuffing. Of course, it’s not something I would ever serve at a
dinner party, but frankly, when it’s a life or death situation you stop thinking about such trivial matters. Getting a mattress into one’s bathroom is difficult at the best of times but near impossible when you’re wearing a hazmat suit and a military issue gas mask. After some persistence, and with the bathtub filled with fresh water (the water supply is always the first to be infected), the door and windows sealed (not all chemicals are visible you know) and Wally purring comfortably in the toilet bowl, I resigned myself to a restless slumber. I couldn’t help think of the unlucky ones. Spare a thought CONTINUED PAGE 6
“DO YOU KNOW THIS IS VANDALISM?”
reshuffled, with former candidate for president, Ridah Hassan, stepping aside for the more experienced candidate, Callum Brindley. In addition to this reshuffle, previous favorite for President, Fleur Hawes of the Golden Ticket, CONTINUED PAGE 7
Yasmin Masri documents the seamy underbelly of the Law School, and its amazing grafitti. Page 18.
Woroni reported in the last edition that tariffs – the fees that students pay to live at Bruce, Fenner, Ursies, B&G and Toad – are set to increase by 7-8% in 2012. While the University is definitely looking to raise tariffs, a final decision is still a way off. Last year, ANUSA and PARSA representatives lobbied successfully for a freeze on tariffs. The point of this freeze, agreed to by the previous Vice-Chancellor, was to allow time to conduct a review of Hall fees and costs. It’s now unclear whether this review ever happened, as in a tragicomic twist, no one – not the staff, nor the representative bodies – seems to have actually seen the results. Now, the University wants to hike fees for students. Currently, ANUSA, PARSA and the presidents of some residents’ committees are working to prevent the University from raising fees without conducting the promised review. So far, we have had two meetings with the University on this issue. In the first meeting, the proposal was sent around to participants the night before the morning meeting, and contained no budgetary information that we could use to understand the proposed raise. In the second meeting, students were told that a review had been conducted in November 2010. The review was allegedly conducted CONTINUED PAGE 10
NEWS
CONFIRM ~ or ~ DENY
WORONI A Publication of ANU Student Media
Editors Elouise Fowler Sophie Turnbull Angus Minns Simon Thompson Scott Bolton Tom Westland Uma Patel Cameron Knott
UniLodge Open Day A story about eighteenth-century Russian minister Grigory Potemkin tells of how he artfully deceived the Empress Catherine II during her visit to Crimea in 1787. The banks of the Dniepier River, along which the empress would sail, were bare and uninhabited, and hardly likely to impress the sovereign. So Potemkin ordered the construction of village façades along the banks of the river to fool Catherine into thinking that her newly acquired territory was a thriving metropolis. The tale is no doubt apocryphal, but Potemkin’s spirit is alive and well at this university, where it is rumoured that certain members of UniLodge management got a little busy just before Open Day this August. Woroni understands that the night before hundreds of visitors descended upon campus, whiteboards at UniLodge were mysteriously filled with notices about events that no one had heard of previously. Just as mysterious, the day after, the whiteboards had been scrubbed back to their former state of pristine whiteness. When it comes to Open Days, a little subterfuge is to be expected. Union Court is never that busy, academics are never that friendly, and if you really believe the food at Burgmann is always that fragrant, then we have a decorated bridge over Sullivans Creek you might be interested in purchasing. But our advice to a certain member of the UniLodge heirarchy would be this: next time, if you’re going to invent fictitious events to impress visitors, it might be best to at least go through the motions of organising them.
New solar panels for ANU EDWARD BYRNE WRITER
In conjuction with the Department of Sustainability, Environment, Water, Populations and Communities, ANU has recently installed an array of 60 solar panels on the roof of the Student Concessions Building. In addition to improving the décor of the Concessions Building, this addition to ANU’s energy infrastructure will contribute around 21,000 kilowatt hours of clean, green energy to ANU grid per annum. This contribution equates approximately to the energy used over the course of the year by five households. The panels will allow ANU to reduce its average yearly emissions by around 19 tonnes and represents a move towards creating an environmentally conscious and
sustainable campus. Not only will this see a cut in emissions, the university and ANUSA are also saving money. Current ANUSA President Leah Ginnivan, indicated that “thousands of dollars” in savings would flow from the installation of the array. This project resulted from the collaboration between ANU’s Education Precincts of the Future program and the Federal Government’s Green Precincts Fund. At the unveiling ceremony, Senator Don Farrell, the Parliamentary Secretary for Sustainability and Urban Water, indicated that the program served a dual purpose: providing for a more sustainable environment whilst contributing to community education and awareness of environmental issues. Beyond the new solar array, the Education Precincts of the Future program has a number
of new ideas in the pipeline to improve sustainability on campus, including plans for improved water conservation. The proposals include the conversion of Willows Oval from grass to synthetic turf, and a more efficient system for collecting storm water. Senator Farrell indicated that these measures alone would be likely to save ANU 15 million litres of drinking water a year. There is likely to also be a greater focus on the use of carbon neutral transport on campus. Senator Farrell presented an optimistic view about the likelihood of future projects of this sort. The Federal Government, which contributed over $1 million toward the solar array is apparently eager to support sustainable projects both at ANU and more widely. ANU should be able to move toward more sustainable programs in the near future.
Subeditors Marie Ngiam (News) Richard Keys (News) Izzy Roper (Opinion) Rachel Davies (Opinion) Lisa Visentin (Features) Gareth Robinson (Features) Jess Millen (Culture) Liv Clarke (Culture) Will Walton (Sport) Farzaneh Edraki (At-Large) Cam Wilson (Web) Tom Garwood (Web) Zid Mancenido (Outreach) Most Eligible Bachelor Angus Minns Letters To The Editor Love us or loath us, we’d love to hear from you! The best letter published wins a kilo of coffee from our friends at Lonsdale St. Roasters. Send in letters to woroni@anu.com.au Submissions We welcome submissions for all sections of the paper. Send them in to woroni@anu.edu.au or come to our office and have a chat. Online Check out all the content from the paper + special web only content at www.woroni.com.au Woroni Editorial
THE NEWS EXPLAINED with Max Phillis The East African famine Sadly this may be the first you have heard about the famine in East Africa, certainly it hasn’t received the publicity of that in the 1980s “Band-Aid” era. People in Somalia, Kenya, Ethiopia and Uganda are suffering the effects of their worst drought in 60 years, causing food prices to double in many areas. The UN’s Food Security Unit has warned that 750,000 people are likely to die in the next 4 months
without adequate food aid, while 10.7 million people are in need of humanitarian assistance. The international response has been hampered by several factors. First, large parts of Somalia are controlled by the Al-Qaeda affiliated Al-Shabaab militia. This disqualifies the area from American aid, however security concerns and theft of aid by the militia means existing funds do not reach people anyway. Second, the flood of refugees to neighbouring countries has created even more urgent problems. Close to one million Somalis now live
in Ethiopian and Kenyan refugee camps, the Dadaab camp in Kenya hosts 440,000 refugees despite a capacity of only 90,000. This concentration of need reduces the amount of aid that reaches the more remote areas, resulting in a constant flow of new people to the camps. Third, this concentration of people has facilitated an outbreak of diseases such as measles and cholera. Due to malnourishment rates exceeding 30% amongst children, mortality associated with the disease has increased from an already high base. This situation is unlikely to be quickly resolved.
@Woroni Al-Shabaab still refuses foreign aid, fearing it will be undermined in the process. Furthermore, even if perfect agricultural conditions were guaranteed from now on it would be several months before crops reach maturity. The fate of many East Africans is now in the hands of the UN food programmes. Even so, there is no guarantee of survival.
Deadline Submissions for Edition 13 must be in before 5PM Monday 3rd of October
Printed by mpd - printing the news everyday. Unit E1, 46-62 Maddox Street Alexandria NSW 2015 2011 Woroni Branding by Chandler Specialist Design: info@chandlersds.com
4
NEWS
THE MONTH
Woroni’s guide to the world at large
NEWS QUIZ
Slave-archy in the UK An underground slavery ring has been discovered in Bedfordshire, England. More than twenty men were held in what’s been described as “filthy, cramped conditions” in a caravan park just north of London. Many of the men were homeless or unemployed, and were reportedly recruited from soup kitchens and forced into manual labour.
Take it off!
Arab Spring
1,200 Israelis and tourists alike have stripped off in the name of art and conservation. US photographer Spencer Tunick organised the mass nude photo shoot in the Dead Sea, with a view to raising the Dead Sea’s profile as part of a campaign to have it recognised as one of the world’s seven natural wonders. Scientists warn that the Sea could dry up by 2050, unless urgent action is taken.
Unrest and political upheaval continue in the Middle East, as the fortnight saw fresh protests in the Yemeni capital. Meanwhile in Egypt, the state’s election commission has set the date for the upcoming elections to the lower house of Parliament: November 21.
1 According to a recent poll by The Age, what percentage of Australians think Australia should opt out of the UN Refugee Convention? 2
Who called German Chancellor Angela Merkel an “unfuckable lardass”? 3 What is the name of the terrier on the ABC’s At Home with Julia?
Police in Santa Cruz, California have adopted a rather unconventional crime-fighting technique. With the aid of a mathematical algorithm that predicts when and where certain crimes will be committed, police officers arrive on the crime scene before the criminals themselves. So far, five people have been arrested under the “predictive policing” program.
Google this Google’s Street View has again served as the target for practical jokers. Images of Long Gully and Maiden Gully in Victoria are now framed in a giant green outline of a penis, thanks to the efforts of a few graffiti artists who drew the outline on one of Google’s camera lenses. This isn’t the first instance of Street View penis-related prankery. Earlier this year, six penises were engraved on a New Zealand school ground. Google is yet to remove the images.
Gordon Ramsay’s dwarf porn double dies in badger den The title says it all, really.
And the winner is... Miss Angola was crowned first place in the 2011 Miss Universe competition, with Ukraine and Brazil awarded second and third runner up respectively. It’s the first time Angola has taken out the top prize. A disappointed Miss France was quick to malign her competitor in French magazine Premier: “She was often in jeans and not wearing makeup. We were all surprised by her win. . . I don’t know, something is missing in her temperament.” Ouch.
What’s in alabel?
5 Workers of which airline took part in a nationwide strike this month?
Out of the wild
New graphic images are to be introduced on cigarette packets in Australia. Under world-first packaging laws, the warnings will be larger in size, and will replace tobacco industry logos or any related brand imagery. Health Minister Nicola Roxon hopes the nofrills, confrontational packaging will remove some of the “glamour” associated with smoking.
A seventeen year old has been discovered by police in Berlin, claiming to have lived in the woods for the past five years. The boy, whose identity is unknown, claims to have moved to the woods with his father shortly after his mother died.
www.woroni.com.au
ANSWERS 1. 60. 2. Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi. 3. Bill Shorten. 4. Alan Jones. 5. Qantas.
Predictive policing
4 Which controversial radio celebrity will play President Roosevelt in the Sydney and Brisbane productions of Annie?
5
NEWS
VC removes USyd Union Board Directors ALAN HUI WRITER
In mid-August, two board directors of the University of Sydney Union (USU) were removed by the University’s ViceChancellor, Dr Michael Spence, using powers rarely exercised in the Union’s constitution. The removal of Vice President Alistair Stephenson and Treasurer Ben Tang followed a confidential, University Senate authorised investigation into their conduct during and after the 2010 USU board elections. The removal is a rare use of powers afforded
to the Vice-Chancellor and the University Senate in the Union’s constitution. Under section 21 of the constitution the ViceChancellor may, following the completion of an investigation, “direct the carrying out of a fresh election of all or any office bearers under the supervision of the University and/or an independent firm of accountants or lawyers or other appropriately qualified expert”. Vice-Chancellor Spence’s use of the removal power sparked debate about the powers afforded to the University Senate. It also triggered a controversial article in
ANU Women’s Collective hosts Joy Burch KATE McMURTRIE WRITER
On Wednesday September 7th, Joy Burch MLA and Minister for Women at the ACT Legislative Assembly joined the ANU Womens Collective to chat about issues pertinent to young women in Canberra and provided an opportunity for students to ask the Minister questions. One of the first topics of conversation was the differences in the political life of a female politician compared to their male counterparts. The ABC satire, At Home with Julia, which depicts the life of Prime Minister Julia Gillard, ACT Chief Minister Katy Gallagher’s recent comments on the intensity of Question Time and the Street Theatre’s production, MP, which
will show later in October, all seem to indicate that the current political landscape in Australia is generating intense debate. There was also an extensive discussion with the Minister about ANUSA’s efforts to promote safety on campus through a working group. This was highlighted by the National University of Students’ “Talk About It” Survey that questioned 1500 women at various universities about their perceptions of safety on campus. The working group has been reviewing ANU policies on campus safety, setting up a comprehensive website for student use and running a public awareness campaign that will launch early next year. The Womens Collective would like to thank the Minister for attending. the meeting.
Honi Soit, the student newspaper published by the University’s Student Representative Council. The article on the board director removals was printed side-by-side with a venomous article by editors Andy Fraser and Julian Lanarch which began with a character assault on the Vice-Chancellor: “It has been a difficult week for the Vice-Chancellor. With three articles publishing USyd mishaps in the SMH alone, it must be getting hot in that rich mahogany smelling quad office.” Taking exception to Fraser’s version of events leading up to the removals, and no doubt
The day Canberra lost its innocence CONTINUED FROM FRONT PAGE for the madames, mistresses and phallic wonder vendors of Mitchell who were truly suffering. Overnight the patrons of these establishments would surely have received more bang than they could have imagined for their buck. But in the sobering wake of a toxic blast, the libido is always the first to disappear. Once the post-apocalyptic sunlight filtered into the bathroom, bleary eyed and hesitant, I ventured outside. Across the horizon, plumes of thick black toxic smoke meandered endlessly, like a career in the public service. The air felt heavy, as if the town had been burdened with a ghostly horror, but it was probably just the toxic polychlorinated biphenyl. All roads were deserted, an eerie sight in a bustling cosmopolitan city like Canberra.
Win for medical students: SLE gone MARIE NGIAM NEWS SUBEDITOR
The Senate recently passed the Higher Education Support Amendment (Demand Driven Funding System and Other Measures) Bill 2011, which will implement a demand-driven funding system. Public universities will be able to decide how many places they will offer and in which disciplines, based on student demand and the needs of employers. The only exception to the demand-driven funding system is for postgraduate courses and courses in the study of medicine. The Australian Medical Students’ Association (AMSA) has welcomed the passing of the Bill. The President of the AMSA stated that “exempting medical
school places from demanddriven funding acknowledges the need to ensure quality training in appropriate clinical settings, which is already threatened by a dramatic increase in medical student numbers over the past decade.” The Bill also abolishes the Student Learning Entitlement (SLE) system, which benefits medical students in Australia. Under the SLE, higher education students are limited by the number of years they study while still being awarded a Commonwealth supported place. This will no longer be the case in 2012 and medical students will not be required to seek other sources of funding on the basis that they have insufficient SLE to study.
unimpressed by the vitriol of the accompanying article, the ViceChancellor wrote a letter to the Honi’s editors presenting an allegedly more accurate summary. The letter was not published, leading the Vice-Chancellor to publish his letter in the university’s e-newsletter. The board positions vacated by Stephenson and Tang have now been filled by Nai Brooks and Shane Treeves while the board executive position of Vice President has been filled by Zachary Thompson with Rhys Pogonoski as the new Honorary Treasurer.
On street corners, my neighbours huddled over bonfires in empty oil drums. There was a genuinely dazed expression on their wrought faces. They say disasters have the ability to unite. And as more of my neighbours emerged from their shelters, we were unified by our shared grief. Unified by the sheer relief of escaping a cruel fate. But above all, unified by a desire to be a talking head on the local news, whispering “I never thought it would happen to me”. As we sat rehearsing our lines for that hot reporter on WIN television, I knew something had changed. Like the time the love of my life in Year 5, Christina Richardson, pretended to whisper ‘I love you’ across the room to me and then later told everyone she’d actually said ‘colourful’, Canberra had lost its innocence.
Clarification of “Fees Up at Halls” Woroni would like to clarify that the discussion regarding tariff increases in ANU-run halls of residence as reported in last edition’s article “Fees Up at Halls”, is still ongoing. UAS has recommended for up to an 8% rise in tarriff increases in 2012. However, ANUSA together with Hall RAs are lobbying strongly against the proposal to increase tariffs. The final decision on whether hall tariffs will increase in 2012 will only be published in 3-4 weeks time. Woroni regrets the omission.
6
Phantom EU President visits ANU GARETH ROBINSON FEATURES SUBEDITOR
ANU regularly plays host to distinguished visitors but few as influential yet little known as current President of the European Commission, José Manuel Barroso. During his recent visit to Australia, President Barroso spoke to a small group of diplomats, journalists and academics at an event hosted by the Centre for European Studies on Tuesday 6th September. In a speech on the changing nature of EU-Australian relations, President Barroso outlined a new framework treaty aimed at increasing cooperation on trade, education and the distribution of aid in the Asia-Pacific region. However, it was the EU Commissioner’s comments on the government’s Carbon Tax legislation that gained the most attention, stating that Australia stands to gain jobs from opening up “new markets”. The remarks came a day after President Barroso held discussions with Prime Minister Julia Gillard on the potential connecting of a future Australian emissions trading scheme with that of the EU. During his speech President Barroso also alluded to suggestions of an Asia-Pacific regional organisation raised in the past by Kevin Rudd, claiming that while the EU did not serve as “direct model” it remained, “something of a catalyst and reference point for those working towards closer relationships in the region.” The visit of the former Portuguese Prime Minister and Vice President of the European People’s Party to Australia may have been a brief escape from the mounting economic woes of the EU. However, he was unable to avoid questions on the crisis. Reinforcing his belief that the Euro remained strong, he noted that the only way to overcome the debt troubles was to increase integration. President Barroso concluded his speech by acknowledging that Australia was “as far away as you can get” from Europe, perhaps a factor in the thirty-year gap since the previous visit by an EU Commissioner.
NEWS Elections this week CONTINUED FROM FRONT PAGE now faces a serious challenge from the Labor Right aligned Stimulate ticket. Stimulate, which is now running Michael Pettersson for the position of President, is fielding a near complete executive for the elections and it appears that the only executive position they have chosen not to field a candidate for is an education officer. In addition, two tickets which had been contesting the earlier, abandoned election process will not be competing this time around. Both So Queer It Hurts and the joke ticket Barry Drive have not registered to run in this week’s elections. Elections take place this week for the Students’ Association, as well as for delegates to the National Union of Students (NUS). Elections had been scheduled to take place last term. However, problems were identified with the ANUSA Constitution which led to a postponement. Six tickets will be contesting the elections, with four candidates vying for the role of president. Representatives for all faculties were elected unopposed, with Golden Ticket being the only ticket to field candidates. In addition, Activate’s Brett Jones and Isobel Morphy-Walsh were elected as Queer* office and Indigenous Officer respectively, while Golden Ticket’s Christopher Karas will be the new Disabilites Officer.
7
Parliament to decide on student services fee VICTOR WHITE ANUSA TREASURER
If the rather despairingly mundane tale of Craig Thomson ever goes away, Tony Abbott is exiled in Siberia and the Labor government decides to actually govern we should hopefully see the introduction of the Student Services Amenities Fee (SSAF). The legislation is currently before the Senate after being passed by the House of Representatives last November. The SSAF will replace the current system of Voluntary Student Unionism that abolished the previous system of Compulsory Student Unionism. ANUSA welcomes the reintroduction of the SSAF which will increase student advocacy and funding across campuses nationwide. Under the currently proposed legislation a fee would be set by each university, up to a maximum of 254 dollars a year for full time students and 127 dollars for part time students. The proposed act would include the creation of a new component of HELP so that students are able to defer the cost of the SSAF in the same way as HECS. On the 19th of this month, the minister for Tertiary Education,
Senator Chris Evans, introduced new guidelines for the spending and consultative requirements of the SSAF. The new guidelines, which will have to be approved by the House, state that at least part of the SSAF must be spent on student welfare and legal advocacy programs. A welcome addition to the new guidelines is that Higher Education Providers are forced to consult with democratically elected students about how to distribute the SSAF. Also, at least 30% of the funds must be distributed to democratically elected students. ANUSA, with the help of PARSA and ANU Student Media, has written a proposal to the ViceChancellor for the introduction of a student-led committee to allocate 100% of the funds received under the proposed SSAF. This would be distributed amongst democratically elected student organisations that are beneficial for students. ANUSA is confident that the University will agree to allow all of the funds to be student directed. Disclosure: ANU Student Media, which publishes Woroni, would likely receive increased revenue with the introduction of the Student Services and Amenities Fee.
ANUSA to investigate CSSA CAMERON KNOTT EDITOR
ANUSA is investigating the Chinese Students and Scholars’ Association (CSSA). Woroni understands the investigation will focus on the current CSSA President William Qu and the financial transparency of the CSSA.
Move aside, Campus Quacks, Campus Croc and Campus Ducks. This is the year of...
Mr Qu is currently running for ANUSA Social Officer on the Stimulate ticket. If elected, Mr Qu would have joint control over the ANUSA Grants & Affiliations Committee (GAC) he has been accused of misleading. GAC has requested CSSA submit its bank and balance stataments, and action will be taken if necessary.
We all know the only reason people get involved with student politics is so they can have lots of weird, politically meaningful sex with one another. Recognising this, Campus Fucks makes the following promise. No overly fictionalised accounts of boring, boring factional squabbles. No long, self-indulgent analyses. Just lots of HARDCORE SEXUAL GOSSIP! Who’s screwing whom; who isn’t getting any, and who is getting some but really shouldn’t!
CAMPUS FUCKS www.woroni.com.au
CAMPUS FUCKS: WHICH POSITION WILL YOU TAKE?
OPINION
8
No one wins (or, why we hate Gillard) JOSH DABELSTEIN WRITER
Watching America unravel has until recently been a behind-glass spectacle. Talking head A says X will fix problem 1. Talking head B says Y will fix problem 1. Eventually, one forces the other to uncompromisingly cave in to a half-assed, cobbled-together policy which serves a fraction of the purpose that either party really intended. In the US, right-wing ideological heavies have blunted the wills and negotiating stamina of those they’ve leant on to the point that what it is to be “left” or “right” is being redefined by a new, further to the right “center”. This is why so many diet-Coke centre-right policies are being churned out under a Democratic government. The left wanes. Under Obama’s MediCare, a growing segment of the population over 65 still lives without adequate healthcare. And now, the Boehner Plan (the life-raft being flung up shiteconomy-creek, and the only policy the Republicans would agree to) will see the debt ceiling raised, social security and welfare spending cut, and no tax cut alterations.
Next year the Republicans will slam these “failed” policies; policies that could have worked if not for the effect Republican ideological obstinacy had on their conception. When workable ideas and policies are shut down by cinderblock-swinging demagogues who, rather than speaking and acting with the interests of their country at heart, merely dance between the flickering spotlights of that next election, of course no real change can be expected. Now consider how Tony Abbott conducts himself. The recent political and media responses to the Carbon Tax and the onshore/offshore processing question all exemplify the effect that growing ideological extremities are having in Australia. The Opposition and the media have gone to town on Gillard’s Carbon Tax, preying upon the “she lied to us” sentiment. Tony Abbott has called upon the Prime Minister to apologise to the Australian people for lying and take her carbon tax policy to a federal election. The polls reflect this sentiment of untrustworthiness that has been pushed as part of the rhetoric against Labor’s carbon tax. Australians all over are going
so far as to spell it, “Ju-Liar”. News headlines read: “How much longer can it go on?” You may say that a little of the American ham-fisted rhetoric rubbing off on us isn’t the end of the world. But don’t forget that it was this year that Gabrielle Giffords was shot in the head after appearing on a map of the US, marked by crosshairs, on Sarah Palin’s hit list. She is learning to speak and write again. Meanwhile, Alan Jones has suggested that Gillard and Bob Brown should be drowned in a chaff bag. I’m not saying that the Australian political scene is going to get violent, and I’m not pretending to know exactly what a chaff bag is. But this kind of rhetoric is poisonous and another casualty of the symbiotic relationship between politics and the media. The truth of the matter is that Julia Gillard said there would be no carbon tax in a political context sadly forced to pander to the extremist “climate change skepticism” from people like Tony Abbott, and one of the three Independents to decide our election: Bob Katter. But when it looked like we might actually be able to put all this
political pussy-footing to one side and regulate our carbon footprint, the Opposition, performing Tony’s trademark tactic, opposed. Even better, it turns out Tony Abbott isn’t against a Carbon Tax at all: he’s just calling Gillard out for her “lie”. Under the News section on Tony Abbott’s website, the headline “A Realist’s Approach To Climate Change”, posted on Monday, 27 July 2009, reads: If Australia is greatly to reduce its carbon emissions, the price of carbon intensive products should rise. … A new tax would be the intelligent skeptic’s way to deal with minimising emissions because it would be much easier than a property right to reduce or to abolish should the justification for it change. The incessant ear-bleeding rhetoric that the Carbon Tax will hit hardwerkingstrayanfamleez hard, or that it will be bad for our economy, or that it won’t adjust carbon output at all, are all just bullshit scare slogans propped up and paid for by the industries that a carbon tax would affect. As with Obama’s imperiled Medicare, and the decision to raise the debt ceiling in the US,
ideological differences and petty partisan point-scoring tend to stamp on the fuses of negotiation and reasonable compromise. The issue has never been whether taxing carbon would be a good idea or not, but rather that Gillard backflipped on the issue, giving the shamelessly opportunistic Abbott the perfect platform to prostitute himself to the Australian people whilst squandering the potential for positive environmental progress. Faster than we realise, the political spectacles overseas are being brought closer to home. Under this kind of political pressure, instead of appropriately overseeing a mining tax, we ousted a prime minister, and are being forced to watch the Labor Party increasingly accommodate right-wing standards. Reason, restraint, and adequate critique are marginalised by the suffocating media-frenzy surrounding the broth and bubbles of the two major parties’ circular doggy-paddling; who can neither agree on a method of dealing with climate change, nor listen to the growing number of Australians calling for onshore refugee processing to be considered.
OPINION
9
It’s not just corruption RIMA MURYANTINA WRITER
“It’s just corruption. Why should we exaggerate?” said my fellow Indonesian friend when we discussed one of the many cases of political corruption in Indonesia. At first, I was shocked to hear this statement. especially since this friend is an exemplary student. I believe that this friend has never stolen, plagiarised, or participated in political corruption or any other forms of serious crime. But he did tolerate corruption, and disliked the fact that the media exposed corruption in Indonesia – as he thought that it was not a serious crime. This leads me to ask several questions: Why do so many Indonesians tolerate corruption? And why do so many Indonesians get involved in corruption? Is corruption a new subculture in Indonesia and other developed countries; a corrupt subculture similar to those I have read about in a variety of political essays? Is there anything embedded within Indonesian culture that allows people to take money which is not rightfully theirs? What do people in other parts of the world think about corruption? I came to a question I thought I would never dare ask: “Is corruption good or bad?” I’m completely aware of the fact that Indonesian people, especially the Javanese value social harmony’and conflict avoidance greatly. So I understand that every time the Indonesian-Javanese people deal with social problems, they will avoid tense conflict at all costs.
Most of the time, they even choose to forgive people’s mistakes for the sake of preserving social harmony. Those who don’t want to forgive for the sake of a peaceful community are considered selfish. But how forgivable is corruption? This is not the first time I have heard people making similar statements like the one my friend made: “It’s just corruption.” One of the members of the leading political parties in Indonesia recently commented on the corruption attributed to his particular party. “We just corrupt some billions of Rupiah. The other party have corrupted trillions of Rupiah,” he told the press. This statement made people furious, but no one seriously investigated the case of corruption. It seems like people could easily commit corruption, publicly admit their crime, and walk free the same day. The word “just” can be used liberally before a statement of the amount of the money involved in the corruption, as if it were insignificant. In fact, billions of Rupiah could feed a community, or pay a student’s tuition fee at the Australian National University. I know many people might disagree with me. Nor am I saying that my perspective is better than those who tolerate corruption. But from my point of view, I still think cases of political corruption are serious crimes, especially if you live in a country where many people need money more than you do. Unless you consider yourself alone in this world, I think it’s unwise to take money that is not rightfully your own, regardless of the amount. What you regard as “just a few” might mean “so much” for other people. So, for me, it is not “just” corruption. It is corruption. It’s never “just.”
DEBATE IN A MINUTE “Should we remove all limitations on campaign funding during elections?”
For First and foremost is the argument of practicality. Limitations on spending and campaign donations are inevitably hard to enforce, particularly at a student level. Spending caps don’t take into account in-kind donations or items ‘already owned’ by candidates. The system is easy to rig and simply results in disadvantaging candidates willing to play by the rules. Argument two: put simply, more money enables a candidate to get their message out to more people. They can buy more advertisements, which results in more people having an understanding of their policy platforms. Therefore, placing limitations on the amount of spending a candidate can have inevitably limits the amount of people they can communicate with. This is not just bad for the candidate. In terms of political engagement, the more policies the public is aware of the better informed their vote will be. Finally the ‘it-doesn’t-even-work’ argument. This cap doesn’t achieve one of its primary aims, which is to stop the influence of interest groups or at a student level, political parties, on policies. These groups are still highly involved in providing what limited funding is allowed. Further, they often also provide non-monetary support that cannot be monitored or prevented through a cap.
www.woroni.com.au
YASMIN MASRI RICHARD KEYS
Against Abolishing spending limits for ANUSA elections would not deal with the key issues about which students, and therefore ANUSA, should be concerned. These are the quality, clarity and diversity of representation. Firstly, financed tickets are less likely to represent students. This is because it essentially shifts the accountability from students to the benefactor. If a partisan ticket were to secure a benefactor they would be more likely to deliver outcomes that the benefactor wants to ensure their source of funding for the next campaign. Secondly, speech is free. Limiting the amount tickets can spend does not limit freedom of speech so much as it limits the freedom to spend ludicrous amounts on student elections. This only means that now in order to sell their message, student politicians have to actually sell their message, rather than buy off voters with obscene amounts of barbeques and lollies. Thirdly, regulating spending is the best way of ensuring a variety of voices and tickets are represented. If your ideal version of student politics is a couple of tickets of hacks backed by politically aligned benefactors representing partisan views first and students second then by all means allow tickets to spend all they can.
NEWS
To the Editor,
I am writing in respo nse to an article publi shed on the Woroni ba August edition of the ck page of the 25th of paper. I found the article, “You Can’t Review That”, by Jamie Free insensitive to myself as stone, was extremely a Christian. Now, the purpose of this email is not to ran t and rave about an ins more to understand th ensitive article, but e context the author is working under. As I have not read ma ny Woroni editions (I am a new member of I am unsure as to wheth staff at the University) er or not this is one of , a series or a one off. Therefore my query centres around the lac k of respect for one’s have an opinion of Ch belief. It is one thing ristianity, it is another to to show disdain and dis book of a section of respect for the Holy the University. In an institution where we like to know if the au value equality, I would thor will be doing a series of book review other religions - with s on all ‘holy books’ the same nonchalance of and disregard for what audience? is sacred to his target If this is part of a comp rehensive series of un educated book review less important, howeve s, then this email is no r it does not call for ac tion. If, however, the attempt at ‘cutting ed rev iew is a stand alone ge’, then an apology to the readers is the least th e author can offer. The disdain and insen sitivity aside, a non-C hr ist ian colleague has reacte disgust and could not d with even more make it past the first sentence. so, do not dis “confrontation by anot miss this as a merely a her sensitive Christia n”. I look forward to a res ponse. Kind Regards, Timothy P.S. Whether it falls on deaf ears or is met wi th scepticism or laugh prayers. s, the author
The constitutional debacle that brought about the postponement of ANUSA elections has potentially had a significant impact on their outcome and the composition of ANUSA next year. The Left Action ticket has reshuffled, with former candidate for president, Ridah Hassan, stepping aside for the more experienced candidate, Callum Brindley. In addition to this reshuffle, previous favorite for President, Fleur Hawes of the Golden Ticket, now faces a serious challenge from
er Options s, Explore H ll a C re tu a When N , ilet situation Dear Editors sé on the to o p ex r u yo judgements some interest rrespondent’s co r u st yo I read with d n u sented, I mu d while I fo d stylishly pre an g in on campus, an at in at. ately discrim yses somewh apt, appropri nd your anal te fault of ex u yo at ask th when, by no o d to an em ntl orcelain ample, is a ge tion for decorating the p What, for ex ic dil is healthy evelops a pre the open air in h as sl A his own, he d n? t places. is no porcelai ndent is silent on the bes where there o esp ing eyes? yet your corr ion from pry ct te ro p e and natural, at ten and equ ? Please enligh s provide ad es sh ra e k vo Which tree pro s are liable to Which shrub elucidate. ture’s Son Mother Na
s r e st
a ight o R rtn e St
o l F a e d s h t n o f L o L
r e t et
is in my
the Labor Right aligned Stimulate ticket. Stimulate, which is now running Michael Petersson for the position of President, is fielding a near complete executive for the elections and it appears that the only executive position they have chosen not to field a candidate for is an education officer.
10
OPINION
11
AN EYE ON ACCOMODATION Fees not up, yet
Continued from front page
without the involvement of Heads of Hall or students. How a review of residential services could be conducted without involvement of these groups, the key stakeholders in any fee hike, escapes me. Why the review has sat in a confidential file for almost a year, without being produced to the key groups that lobbied for its creation, is a further mystery. I personally am deeply sceptical as to its existence. Although we requested a copy and have asked for it since that meeting, it has not materialised. A further review (this one probably real) is underway at the moment to fully assess the projected costs of the major works that are needed on the residences to bring them up to scratch. One thing is clear - the ANU has not seriously looked at what share of this immense expenditure can feasibly be borne by students, but is instead preemptively asking students to fork out $400-800 a year extra to cover costs not yet quantified. The lack of transparency in the process is scandalous, and hiking fees for students without reviewing costs is damaging to hall life, as well as being counterproductive to the ANU’s aim to have more students enjoying the residential experience. The halls are old buildings, getting more than a little decrepit
round the edges. The University estimates several million dollars are needed to refurbish and rebuild parts of the halls. If the University does not fund at least most of this, fees will keep going up significantly – the 8% rise is really just the beginning. Making this even worse is that until recently, halls were not required to save money for capital works, so none really did. The crumbling infrastructure is the direct result of University mismanagement of their assets ¬– not, emphatically not – the fault of today’s students. Why should today’s cohort pay for the poor planning of the past, while not benefitting from the rebuilds that will happen in the next few years? By refusing to conduct reviews, the University can’t or won’t answer that. Equity Access and equity considerations appear to have played no part in the ANU’s proposal to hike fees on students. ANU’s lowercost uncatered halls have allowed generations of students to support themselves through university if their parents don’t. As an accommodation provider, ANU is aware of the strain students are under financially but seems to believe this is irrelevant when setting its prices. For students on the maximum rate of Youth
Allowance/rent assistance who are working ten hours a week, tariffs eat up close to 80% of total income in catered halls and around 44% in non-catered. That’s before the new hike is factored in. We are currently the worst university in Australia in attracting students from diverse/low income backgrounds. It does not help anyone to have the cheapest accommodation edging up to $180 a week. Splashing bursaries and scholarships around does not address the central issue of creating a welcoming community for a range of students, not just rich ones. If fees continue to rise as the University plans, look out for the continued gentrification of Daley Road while smart, less rich students continue to avoid ANU in droves. Yes, Melbourne and Sydney have more expensive colleges, but we should not compare ourselves to them. The ANU markets itself as a residential campus particularly through initiatives such as the first-year guarantee. Most ANU students do not want sandstone buildings, hazing rituals and boys’ clubs, we want affordable accommodation that helps engage us in learning and meeting other students. ANU’s residences are at their best when they foster a sense of egalitarianism and inclusion.
www.woroni.com.au
Inefficiency At Bruce, cleaners vacuum your room weekly. At Ursies there is a sheet-washing service. These are luxury services that, in my view, students can live without if it means cheaper rent. Currently, ANU-run residences have no incentives to run things more cheaply, as tariffs are centrally set. And do students value three hot meals a day more than several hundred extra dollars at the end of the year to purchase textbooks the following February? This is the discussion that needs to happen. In my opinion, students should be asked every year about what they most value about their residential experience and where savings could be made. During my time living at college I certainly would have preferred to keep a few dozen extra bucks a week and be served less deep fried egg bread/warmed reconstituted egg powder, and more salad and toast. Savings in staff costs is not the bulk of the budget shortfall but it should be part of the conversation. Again, the ANU is not considering this in any systematic way not is it including residents in these discussions.
But this means our on-campus accommodation will increasingly become the preserve of students whose parents can afford to pay. The reality is that living on campus is an essential part of the ANU experience for interstate students. A few scholarships are welcome but are no substitute for making residences more inclusive for a broader range of students in general. If the residential experience is important at ANU, the University should, at the very least, see if it can put its money where its proverbial mouth is. Funding many millions of dollars’ worth of buildings in the ANU exchange, yet claiming it would be wrong to “cross-subsidise” the residential experience is disingenuous. Long term planning is needed to ensure that the halls’ viability and success at adding value to the student experience. Frustratingly, this seems to be entirely missing from the ANU’s current approach. If this concerns you, and it should, I encourage you to contact the University and your Head of Hall, and talk to your residents’ association. ANUSA will keep lobbying but we need your help.
The residential experience The University appears to be cynically calculating that even if it drastically hikes its fees, it will still be able to fill its rooms.
ANUSA is conducting a review of accommodation for ANU students. Check it out on the ANU Students’ Association on facebook or get in touch with Leah at sa.president@ anu.edu.au
FEATURE ANDALEEB KAVYA KUMARESAN AKHAND WRITER
This year marks the 10th anniversary of the September 11 attacks, when Al-Qaeda terrorists hijacked four passenger jets, two of which crashed into New York City’s World Trade Centre and a third ploughed into the Pentagon, where the United States’ Defence Department is housed. On that tragic day, nearly 3000 people died, including 11 Australians. Most students now studying at ANU would be have been very young when the attacks occurred in September 2001. But the poignancy of the event for many of us would have been no less significant because of our youth. I was 12 years old when the attack occurred and I
distinctly remember when the TV switched to live coverage of the planes crashing into the towers. Just as earlier generations could recall exactly what they were doing when they received news of Gough Whitlam’s dismissal or John F. Kennedy’s assassination, so too can most of our generation recall with great clarity what they were doing on that momentous day. With the elapse of a decade since that devastating day, how much has the world changed? Overall, are we safer now than we were a decade ago? That has to be a vital consideration if we want to evaluate 9/11’s impact. But it’s a hard judgment to make. Certainly, terrorism has skyrocketed as an intelligence and law-enforcement priority; many plots have been foiled by intelligence agencies and police departments, and terrorist plans deterred by tight security measures. Airport security is now more rigorous than ever,
with friskings, armed air marshals and baggage screenings. But the world is still a dangerous place. The year after 9/11, 202 people, including 91 Australians, were killed in nightclub bombings. In 2005, suicide bombers attacked a double-decker bus and three underground trains in London, killing 52. Only this year, there were three coordinated bomb explosions in Mumbai that killed 26. That doesn’t mean that counterintelligence efforts aren’t working. We tend to only hear about the intelligence failures. We rarely, if ever, hear about a thwarted terrorist plot. But it shows that the fight against Islamic terror continues. Many would say that American credibility actually took a beating after Bush launched his Global War On Terror. The great American statesman Benjamin Franklin once said “they who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety”. Yet American
actions, like extraordinary rendition of suspects and the continued use of Guantanamo Bay, seem to fly in the face of this philosophy. If they are trying to protect American ideals, isn’t it vital to maintain those ideals when fighting the enemy? Certainly there are many civil libertarians in America who think the government, in their zeal for the War on Terror, is flouting the very ideals they are supposed to be protecting. Finally, and perhaps among the most important things, it is necessary to evaluate whether 9/11 remains a polarising issue in relations between Muslims and the West. A Pew Research Center study released at the end of August suggests that about the same percentage of American Muslims today as in 2007 find life has become more difficult since 9/11. On the other hand, there is no indication of increased alienation or anger among Muslim Americans. Maybe though, it’s the proposed plan to build a mosque
12
and cultural center near New York City’s Ground Zero that best highlights the polarity that still exists. While Obama endorsed “the right to build a place of worship and a community center on private property in lower Manhattan”, nearly 70% of Americans in a CNN-Opinion Research Corporation poll said they opposed a Ground Zero mosque. They’re probably not all xenophobes or Islamophobes, but more likely, it shows that even 10 years on, emotions can still run very strong. Even though a decade is a long time, in the timescale of history it is relatively short. For the present, we can only make tentative evaluations as to 9/11’s impact on our society. Whether the Muslim world working with the West can manage to defeat Islamic fundamentalism and whether Iraq and Afghanistan can emerge as successful nation-states may be things that only our grandchildren will know.
SEPTEMBER 11 REFLECTING ON A DECADE
FEATURE
13
Asperger’s Sydrome: Coping at University PAUL JORDAN WRITER
Perhaps some of you have heard of Asperger’s Syndrome, or AS for short. If you have, you might know that it can make university study difficult. Can you imagine growing up without intuitively knowing how to start a conversation with someone else your age, or more generally, how to interact with other people, and preferring to be around adults rather than your peers because your peers bully you? Then, imagine a 17 or 18 year old (who isn’t a member of MENSA) starting uni, and being expected to be a fully-functioning adult, with all that entails. He or she would have a hard time. After being diagnosed in 2009 at age 25, I decided to start a support group for other students who have Asperger’s Syndrome. It has three main objectives: friendship and support for students with Asperger’s Syndrome; discussion and resolution of any study related problems; and the creation of awareness and understanding of Asperger’s Syndrome among the University community.
Genius Albert Einstien was thought to have had Asperger’s Syndrome. Asperger’s was not a recognised condition until 1944 and only became a clinical diagnosis in the mid ‘90s.
Firstly, friendship and support for those who have Asperger’s Syndrome. Most of you who learned social skills intuitively as small children would, I believe, take the ability to make friends for granted. Just imagine being an undergraduate who feels, in terms of social skills, that they should be back in Year 9 or Year 10. This is why in part I started the group,
because this is exactly how I felt as an undergraduate from 2002 to 2006. The support group will provide the opportunity for students with Asperger’s Syndrome to socialise with people with whom they have something in common. People with Asperger’s Syndrome also generally take longer to complete tasks, this includes university study. The Disability
Services Centre facilitates offers support for these students because, ultimately the goal is for them (especially undergraduates) to get the necessary marks in order for them to achieve their desired goals. Secondly, the group facilitates the discussion and resolution of any problems. This involves any of the current or prospective
members discussing any issues they may have and referring them to me or to Rebecca Ryan, the Manager of the Disability Services Centre, for resolution. Thirdly, in terms of creating awareness and understanding at the University, there will be occasional workshops at the Counselling Centre and the Dean of Students, Professor Penelope Oakes, will raise the issue of delivery of support for students who have Asperger’s Syndrome with the University’s Disability Sub-Committee, which she chairs. It is imperative that lecturers know something about how to manage students with AS, especially in terms of their interaction with other students in the class and their submitting high-quality assignments on time. Membership of the group is open to both coursework and research students who have been diagnosed with AS and those who believe they have it, as well as any allies (friends and relatives) of students with AS if they are interested. The group already meets on a monthly basis. If you would like further information, please call Paul Jordan, on 0401 841 783 or email me at paulj3434@gmail.com
Artists, photographers & cartoonists... ...Woroni wants you. Woroni is looking for artwork from talented students to feature in our paper. If you have material you’d like us to use, send us an email at woroni@anu.edu.au
www.woroni.com.au
FEATURE
14
ANU’s creators of knowledge VC Students talk to ANU’s best and brightest VCUG2001 Creating Knowledge (CK) is a prestigious Vice Chancellor’s Course for talented, inquiring first years who want to know what makes universities tick. With some of the ANU’s best lecturers to inspire and stimulate, CK students get to do interesting assignments as they explore how different disciplines and cultures construct knowledge. The first assignment this year involved interviewing ANU researchers and writing articles based on the interviews. However, the articles attracted more than a mark, with the best three selected for publication in Woroni. Check out the following articles from CK’s best and brightest. And, as you read them, remember this: If you are a CK student next year, you could be reading your own work in Woroni in 2012. For more info, contact the awesome CK Convenor, Mary Kilcline Cody on mary.kilcline.cody@anu.edu.au or check out the website at http://vc-courses.anu.edu.au/creating-knowledge
Taking a hardline on software with Dr Michael Norrish CAMERON BESTWICK VC STUDENT
It shouldn’t come as a surprise to you that aeroplanes are heavily reliant on computer software. So are many other items that we literally trust with our lives, such as medical facilities and the braking systems in cars. These machines all rely on software to perform their life-or-death functions. Now consider the software on your computer, think of the number of times that software has failed you. Would you trust your computer software with your life? If the answer is no, then why trust the software in anything, especially the software in that essential computer we use more than anything else: the mobile phone? How do you verify the software in mobile phones? Well as usual, ANU has the solution. Dr Michael Norrish is one of the researchers that successfully verified mobile phone operating systems. Having earned his Ph.D. from Cambridge University, he carefully explains the process of verifying mobile phone operating systems. Imagine you wanted to test whether software crashes at inappropriate moments. In most disciplines, you would run the software as many times as possible and track the number of errors.
You would then reduce the errors by adjusting and trialling again. Unfortunately, with aeroplanes and medical equipment, trial and error isn’t an option. You have to test all the possibilities.
“How do you verify the software in mobile phones?” Instead, Dr Norrish uses mathematical theorem proving to verify the software.
Phones have two operating systems that allow other software to access the hardware. One of these is for calls and the other is for everything else. With one mobile phone operating system consisting of 10,000 lines of code and the software on top of that consisting of 1 million lines of code, testing all the possibilities would take a lifetime, so logic is the only way to verify the software. Dr Norrish and his colleagues have to prioritise which software to verify - so how do you do that? Well, think back to your laptop. When one piece of software crashes the other software starts crashing too. So if the operating
system for phone calls crashes, the billing, network and satellite software might crash also, making it an instant priority. So is helping industry solve a commercial dilemma worthy ANU research? Is it a contribution to human knowledge, for the benefit of the nation? Absolutely! Being somewhat modest, Dr Norrish claims that the project was more of an accomplishment than the creation of new knowledge. But by succeeding, the techniques they used to reduce mobile phone software errors were proven correct. Now proven, other academics will build on their techniques and apply them in other areas of software verification, thereby embedding the new knowledge in the process. When asked about the contribution of his research to “the stock of human knowledge” he framed his answer in a considered way: that the project took years and thousands of man hours to complete. Three of his team members received their Ph.D. for the project. Norrish remarks almost as an afterthought that the project developed these three colleagues to a state of readiness. They are now capable of pursuing new knowledge and they will succeed. An interesting concept and certainly one you wouldn’t expect from anyone other than an academic of mathematic theorem proving. By preparing other young
minds for the difficulties of research one can make a greater contribution to human knowledge. It takes humility. It doesn’t carry prestige. But in the end, that “stock of human knowledge” is greater. This unorthodox means of growing the stock of knowledge by growing the number of knowledge creators as well as researching is reserved for those with a true passion for the pursuit of new knowledge.
Dr Michael Norrish, Research School of Computer Science
FEATURE
15
Korean popular culture with Dr Roald Maliangkay ALEXANDRA GILL VC STUDENT
Blue plastic cats, six languages, traditional folksongs and Swarovski crystals; such an assortment spells-out an expertise in Korean culture and a search to understand the nature of humanity. How? Well one man here at the ANU seems to know… Roald Maliangkay’s background in Korean cultural heritage forms the foundation of his expertise and research. However, it is the quintessential “so what?” question that inspires his investigations and so called “story building” in Korean popular culture. Despite not following a particular plan, he feels that his background in traditional folksongs has been “quite useful” in developing his current research and interests. Dr Maliangkay’s continued sourcing from his background in Korean history is inherent in the layout of his office. Here he spends an estimated 60% of
Dr Roald Maliangkay, senior lecturer with the School of Culture, History & Language
his time researching, including weekends. On one wall stands an extensive library of textbooks, journals and language dictionaries, no doubt many written by Dr Maliangkay himself, containing a wealth of knowledge and expertise in Korean history and cultural policy. On the opposite wall, almost in contention with the Korean literature, is an overwhelming array of colours and
ornaments from Korean popular culture. Despite the differences between these two areas of expertise, Dr Maliangkay manages to reconcile past and present by using his historical knowledge as a base from which to investigate those “so what?” questions. He describes such knowledge as a shore, saying that “it’s really hard to swim in open water… and I like to kind of swim away from
the shore, if you will, just so that I have something to go back to. So I always expand on what I have done.” Such is the nature of his research; one inspired by his interests and spurred on by his surroundings. Dr Maliangkay believes that researching at the ANU provides a fresh perspective into the study of Korean culture, generating creative responses that differ from his Korean counterparts. Some of his published work, including ‘Dirt, Noise and Naughtiness’ and ‘Classifying Performances: The Art of Korean Film Narrators’, emphasise his unique perspective and research process as they focus on original alternate sources, thus providing new insight into Korean pop culture. Dr Maliangkay is fortunate to often begin his research with something he considers “interesting or cool”, and then build a story based on his own quirks and passions. It seems hard to go wrong when such is the nature of your research, however the struggle in differentiating work from play
is something he considers to be “the tricky things about pop culture”. With an office filled with stimulating ornaments and pictures it is easy to see why Dr Maliangkay is so passionate about his work. However, sometimes he claims that writing about pop culture “really takes the fun out of it.” In reflecting on his research it is easy to see how the line can blur between work and play and note that this is not an issue one encounters when coming from a discipline such as science. It seems that this struggle is set to remain in his work as he moves onto future projects researching ownership and the nature of people in society. Inspired by visits to Chinese family homes, Dr Maliangkay hopes to understand something “intrinsic about humans” through his work with collections in popular culture, namely Chinese Swarovski collectors. One can only wait in anticipation to see whether such collections will in fact speak to the nature of humanity.
Why politics? with Professor Ian McAllister MUHAMMAD TAUFIQ BIN SURAIDI VC STUDENT
In an interview with Distinguished Professor of Political Science, Ian MacAllister, I attempted to make sense of political science and its importance in society. Professor MacAllister is an authority in Political Science. He has held the Directorship of ANU’s Research School of Social Science; Chairmanship positions in the University of New South Wales, University of Manchester and the Comparative Study of Electoral Systems project; as well as an editor of Australian Journal of Political Science since 2004. “Political Science is the master science because politics is the one thing that affects everything in a person’s life. ... [I]t is quite fascinating to travel and talk to people, find out what they think about things and about their country.” According to Professor MacAllister, politics attempts to answer the fundamental question of “who gets what, when and
how?” In this field, the answer lies in the sentiments of the general public, thus it is a discipline with a ‘mainstream’ orientation. Political science seeks to understand the political attitude of the public such as their views on governments, foreign affairs, their lives and society in general. The field then attempts to understand how social factors like political institutions, the internet, the media, influence political attitude. Professor MacAllister believes that there is no value system that can judge between political systems. “It is not about which system is better. It is about what you want.” How society organises itself through the political institutions they build is mainly a reflection of their political attitude as they try to answer “who gets what, when and how.” Hence, understanding what influences their political attitude and its consequences is very important because it will give us a clearer understanding of why society is organised in a certain way. With such knowledge, we will be able to better assess the way we do things and whether
Ian McAllister, Distinguished Professor of Political Science
it needs to be changed or reexamined with time. These I believe are the motivations behind Professor MacAllister’s research and his interest in the field generally. Furthermore, Professor MacAllister believes that “everything must be evidence driven.” Political science is a discipline that seeks to understand the current reality before attempting to theorise about causes and effects.
www.woroni.com.au
Tools of evidence gathering such as opinion polls are used to gather data on the public as evidenced in a lot of his research. He believes that if a sufficient amount of questions are being asked, the researcher can learn a lot about the respondents and the public’s political attitude. For example, people often overlook things that are at face value or make general assumptions about society without acknowledging empirical proof. Economists, especially
capitalist proponents, approach data assuming that the people they are looking at are rational, selfinterested and optimizing. Political scientists, on the other hand, create knowledge by looking at things objectively at face value without any underlying assumptions. From there, explanations are attempted but it nonetheless remains openended as subsequent data either confirms or modifies their hypothesis. From all this, political science has cemented itself as a fundamental discipline because it seeks to establish and understand the realities of public opinion. It does not try to eschew this reality in the prism of any assumptions. Hence, in an age when public discontent towards politics and its institutions is prevalent, nothing is more important than to invite the academics and decision makers to attempt to understand the underlying reasons for such sentiments by looking at the realities objectively without bias and, in due course, provide remedies to this ailment and make the world a better place.
CULTURE
POETRY
You Don’t Make Friends With Salad by MIRA MELALUCA-VENUGOPAL
I of society am fixated at a very blunt point, We are what we eat and tomorrow I will be you; I will devour you and chew through your body, like, as if, it lacked soul and that purpose was pleasing me too A puppy lust playing with its toy in the moonlight, glistening and wet, it cries and it sings Fill me with meaning famous phantom, oh dark knight please make me a few of your favourite things? Ain’t no mountain higher nor river wiser than desire, flooding greener crops with drops of blood and cream, full but fine figured, your other side’s playing with its dinner desserted and satisfied, society and I scream.
Leaf, Tree, Dream by STUART OWEN I stopped, glimpse caught upon a leaf, It fell from its branch with a flutter and leap And told me, ‘life is naught but sleep’. Amongst the petrichor it stirred. Roots below and sun above - to look upon the entire tree, How it thrust from nowhere, steadily. And the branches sway; ‘life is naught but dream’. Whispering the wind as they slept. Then later, drifting through the town Three bare-thread men, slouched with caps on the ground. Their cardboard read, ‘life is not sound’.
The Curtain by STUART OWEN Streets of heat in the night are crowded, Their buildings open only to the dark. Their flashing lustres, blighted brightly, off the mirrors white, in black. Playing to the shadows show; indifferent performance houses Denizen inside each heart. And it makes me wonder Where the character goes when the curtain falls. Where did they prepare their mask? Did someone drive them to it in the way they shared the past? Could the one responsible step downstage, to take their final bow? Look upon the soul, and know what it is to move it. Create the perfect part, finally open clammy hands clutching stiff with fright. Hold your sail in the wind, and stand alongside it like a mast. Trust your past, embrace tomorrows day with passing night. The strongest question posed by old least likely, “Who am I?” Growls around infliction, and sadly soft subsides, The part you expect you never saw But felt down somewhere deep inside. Your senses tingled, for it to tangle, and never find escape; It meant the sorrow of a weathered willow, and it’s many wilting vines. It meant to live while bearing through the might of one decay. The play was never meant to be a comedy divine. For still there are those, pitched in the framework who stand there as the door, Fearful of your heart of hearts, wanting you to stay outside, Fearful of their hearts of hearts, Still begging you close enough to taste their wine. To spit the rest back in the cup, only one small taste will do, And tell the guy who’s next in line to fix his tie and come on through. There has got to be more, there has got to be more. Where do you go when the curtain falls?
And still, they are the closest yet.
Interested in helping set up an ANU Radio Station?
Shoot us an email at woroni@anu.edu.au to find out more...
16
CULTURE
17
Every day I’m shufflin’ Woroni chats to Aston Shuffle’s Vance Musgrove about music, moving and Mikah. UMA PATEL EDITOR
So you’re originally from Canberra, did you grow up here or did you move here over time? I’m Canberra born and bred, I move to Sydney at the start of this year, so pretty much the whole way until then. I could tell you how many years that is but I might embarrass myself. Did you go to university here? I did actually, I went to ANU it’s quite cool to be interviewed by the whole Woroni experience. I was there for 6 years, I did science and law. I got signed to Ministry of Sound half way through my final year and I was kind of freaking out because I had 6 months left to finish and I was kind of freaking out because I didn’t want to not finish it
now but every one was very supportive. So things didn’t really kick off until after that. So you were doing both uni and music? For a while there, yes. Things hadn’t kicked off too much but I was producing stuff of my own and a friend of mine who is now my housemate, we used to put parties on in Canberra. Were you into the ANU scene or were you more into the wider Canberra based scene? The whole dance scene within ANU itself wasn’t particularly well pronounced at that point in time. I suppose I just gravitated towards my little group of friends and we kind of did our own thing at places like Toast where you can kind of get away with it, as opposed to ANU maybe we were just anxious about getting enough people through the door as opposed to what we wanted to do musically I guess. What made you decide to not practice law or science and follow through on your music career instead? I knew fairly early on in my
degree that I didn’t want to be a lawyer but I suppose there’s the usual pressures of not wanting to quit something that you’ve started and there’s a certain perception that a law degree is a valuable thing to have regardless of whether or not you end up working in law as a profession. I am certainly not suggesting I did the wrong thing. In the music business having a law degree really helped in terms of understanding. There’s always going to be a lawyer that you can take your contract to have them look at it but it’s a different thing when you can read it and understand what it is on your own terms. How do you think the Canberra scene compares to Sydney now that you’ve seen both? Sydney is obviously a bigger town, the thing that Sydney has that Canberra doesn’t necessarily have is venues but even then, Sydney at the moment in terms of the club scene, there’s a lul happening a the moment. Canberra was firing in the 20032008 period when I was at uni and everything was bubbling away and there seems to be a lot
more venues then there is now. Canberra back then probably was more exciting on a scene level than Sydney is right now. Do you miss Canberra? Absolutely, I really do miss Canberra. I miss the city itself. So what made you decide to leave? By observation alone, the friends of mine that grew up in Canberra [like myself] – born and bred are the ones that needed to leave… So there was always a part of me that wanted to [move to] the big cities. Speaking of friends, how did you and Mikah [the other half of Aston Shuffle] meet? Basically back when record stores used to exist. On a Thursday or a Friday, that’s when the new records would come in, so every DJ in town would descend on Land Speed and Sanity, so everyone would go around those stores and meet up and say “what party are you putting on”. So from the bass guys to the
hip hop guys to the trance guys, everyone would end up talking to each other just because you were in the same shop looking for records. Mikah used to work at Sanity for a bit and then when that closed down he ended up working at Land Speed, so he was like “the record guy” and there’s no better friend to have than the guy behind the counter of the store when the new records come in because he can give you the stuff before anyone else. The audience that follow an electronic crowd are very different from, for example, an Opera audience. Is the electronic crowd more ideal? I don’t actually know whether or not that actually appeals anymore. One of the things that attracted be to dance music back in the day was that it was super, super underground. There was this element of “what is the music and where do you buy it from?”. It was a very mysterious thing so you had to follow the trail of breadcrumbs to the record store, and then make friends with them to get access to the parties and venues. It wasn’t like it was given up to you on a platter. Wheras these days on facebook, the concept of getting a flier doesn’t axist anymore because you sit passively while everybody broadcasts event invites to you and you can pick and choose what you want to go to. Facebook is the language of everyone’s social life these days so there is no element of discovering something that you can’t discover anymore because everything is on a level playing field. The thing that defines the last couple of years is that indie kids are no longer necessarily into Indi bands because everyone is kind of into everything. You remix a lot of songs, have you ever met someone that you’ve remixed and had them hate it or have you every had the vice versa where someone’s remixed you and you’ve hated it? It definitely happens, when its someone remixing us that we’re not into, we try and be diplomatic about it and give constructive criticism. We’ve certainly had cases where people have hated the remix but it still comes out anyway because they understand that its just the Australia remix. Apparently Dizzy Rascal hated the remix that we did of “Dance With Me”.
www.woroni.com.au
CULTURE
18
IF THESE DESKS COULD TALK Photos by Yasmin Masri
Ever sat at the desks in the upstairs law library? Forty years of anxieties, frustrations, fears and delights of law students are inscribed on their surfaces and weave an untold story of the ups and downs of study, exams and life of generations of ANU law students. The ANU LSS has commissioned photographer and art student Yasmin Masri to document the graffiti on the desks for an exhibition as part of our focus on mental health and law school culture. The opening will be at 12pm on Wednesday Week 9, so come along and grab a glass of wine, free lunch and see the stress of law school displayed in a totally different light. Alice Crawford President of the Law Students’ Society
CULTURE
19
Pura Vida CAROLINE DOYLE WRITER
In Costa Rica, everything is pura vida (poor-ah vee-dah). Pura vida is a local saying that translates to ‘pure life.’ You use pura vida to greet someone, pura vida to say goodbye, pura vida to thank someone, you say pura vida to the immigration department, pura vida to the taxi driver, pura vida to Oscar Arias- el presidente de Costa Rica. When I moved to Costa Rica last year to spend eighteen months working in San Jose, I had a feeling my adventure would be pura vida. My task was to set up a local tourism office for a Canadian adventure travel company. Sounded simple enough - find an office space, set up the business name, the internet and phone connection, and get some business cards together with the company address. I thought I would be able to get all this done in a week and spend the rest of the time lazing around in a hammock on a deserted beach, sipping cocktails. I was wrong. Oh so wrong. I did not know how pura vida my adventure would be…. Costa Ricans do not believe in street names and numbers. They think it is easier to understand and remember de la esquina norteeste del antiguo aide, 100 metros norte, 25 metros este, 25 metros oeste, la casa con la puerta verde con 4 palitos (this translates to: from the northeast corner of the old building, 100m north, 25m east, 25m west, to the house with the green door with four sticks). This was the official address of the office. Trying to explain this address to the CEO of the company was ‘pura vida.’ This becomes increasingly problematic because the addresses
in San Jose refer to landmarks that don’t actually exist anymore – like this address: 100 metros norte de la coca-cola (100m north of the Coca-Cola). In the 1950’s there was apparently a Coca-Cola factory in San Jose – yet it closed down in the 1960’s. But people still refer to it as ‘la Coca-Cola.’ The best one I was told was ‘500 metros norte de donde fue el arbol’ – 500m north from where the tree was…. How am I meant to know where the tree was (or when the tree was there…)?! Solo pura vida, pura vida. Pura vida, to the postal system in Costa Rica. Mail in Coasta Rica still has to be hand sorted so, once your package has made it all the way from Canada or Australia to the Costa Rican post office, getting your hands on it is pura vida. Not only do you have to fill out lots of forms and speak to numerous señoras on the telephone about what is in your package and why you want your package, but you also have to pay lots and lots of money in impuestos (taxes) and then wait around to see if they will let you actually have the package. These pura vida games with the Costa Rican postal service will make you laugh, cry, dance, angry, happy and disappointed. It’s like your own telenovela (soap opera), set in the San Jose post office, complete with suspense, laughter and love. The happy ending only comes when the señora actually hands over your package after months of waiting. In spite of all this, or perhaps despite all this, everything I had to do seemed to work itself out. The super friendly Costa Ricans helped me with the addresses and explained where the bakery was located in 1950; the post office handed over my goods, and the señora from the post office over for afternoon tea and tamales.
“Costa Ricans do not believe in street names and numbers”
www.woroni.com.au
CULTURE
20
~ WHAT’S ON ~ FREE
ART
Collective Passions: The Art of Festival Posters Music and film festival posters have become an integral part of Australia’s cultural scene. This exhibition showcases festival posters in the NFSA’s rich and extensive poster collection. 15 August 2011 - 28 February 2012 Foyer Galleries, National Film and Sound Archives.
MUSIC Swing Jazz: In the Mood The brassy, all American celebration of swing jazz is finally touring Australia for the very first time. In the Mood recreates the 1940s live on stage through sizzling choreography, sensational scats and romantic harmonies, sassy costumes and a hypnotic thirteen-piece Big Band, belting out an authentic score of over fifty unforgettable hits from Glenn Miller, Benny Goodman, Tommy Dorsey, Duke Ellington, Frank Sinatra and many more. Canberra Theatre Centre.
Fred Williams: Infinite Horizons Fred Williams is one of Australia’s greatest painters. He created a highly original and distinctive way of seeing the Australian landscape and was passionate about the painting process itself. This is the first major retrospective of Williams’ work in over 25 years. 12 August - 6 November National Gallery of Australia.
THEATRE
OUTDOORS
Arts Revue 2011 Arts students take the mickey out of their peers and teachers in this rollickingly funny production. Friday 30 Sept, 7.30pm Saturday 1 Oct, 2pm & 7.30pm Sunday 2 Oct, 2pm & 7.30pm The Courtyard Studio, Canberra Theatre Tickets: Adults $20, Students $15.
Floriade 2011: A Feast for the Senses Let this year’s program stimulate your senses with dozens of exciting demonstrations, activities, displays and events. Admire the endless possibilities of floral design and see the stunning display of creativity and colour when fashion and flowers come together. 17 Sept - 16 Oct, 9am-5pm Monday to Friday, 9am-5.30pm weekends Commonwealth Park
CULTURE
21
A leap into the unknown JASMINE ZHENG WRITER
In a recent New York Times Op-Ed article, the writer wrote about how the pros of random selection, with particular reference to roommates, outweigh the cons. The writer mentioned the different studies that showed that much education takes place not through formal classroom syllabus, but rather in peer-to-peer learning that occurs in colleges. For example, economist Bruce Sacerdote found in a 2000 study that randomly assigned roommates at Darthmouth in the United States affected each other’s GPAs. On the other hand, David R. Harris, a sociologist at Cornell, found in a 2002 study, that white students who were assigned a roommate of a different race ended up more open-minded about race. Looking back at the moments of randomness and spontaneity in my life, I have to agree with the writer. Unfortunately, with the inventions of the Internet and digital technologies, it has become tempting to resort to Google Search, instead of leaving things to randomness and spontaneity. Having everything in order and control is often valued over randomness. I know of friends who would not watch movies that they haven’t read reviews of or with less than three stars ratings or go to a random new restaurant that has opened up in town. When I first started out as a postgraduate student in ANU last year, I recall forming an alliance with two PhD friends I had just befriended, putting their names down as preferred flat mates on the college accommodation forms online. I was also looking for off campus accommodation with friends. In hindsight, it might have been a blessing that I ended up in a studio on campus. Living in a studio forced me out of my comfort zone, to meet new wonderful friends I would otherwise not have really bothered
knowing if I was living with friends. It was also through randomness that I ended up with a girl from Tanzania as my off campus flat mate during my first year undergraduate days in Brisbane. I learned to appreciate the African culture and food, picked up bits and pieces of the Swahili language, and even hosted her in Singapore. She turned out to be the best flat mate I ever had, and would never have met if I did not leave things up to randomness. Of course, there are other times where random selections meant that I ended up with the worst flat mate ever in my life. Yet, I survived with hilarious tales of my ex-flat mate, the police, ambulance and the hospital to tell. Certainly, there are other areas in life where certainty is valued over randomness, such as when it comes to seeing a doctor or a dentist. You would want a good professional one. A few months ago, I needed a dentist and decided to leave things up to randomness. Typically, I would have typed “good dentists in Canberra” on Google Search, be amazed by the answers I would be getting and choose one from the shortlist of dentists I have gathered. Yet, I chose to visit the dentist that is five minutes away from my office. My dentist turns out to be the best dentist I ever had in my life so far. Out of curiosity, I did a Google search on my dentist’s name the other day. One would never have guessed that the only thing that came up on Google search is that my dentist was actually a nominated bachelor for Canberra’s Bachelor of the Year. If I had done this earlier, I would probably never have turned up for my dental appointment. So, the next time when you have some free time with no one else free, consider catching a random movie. You could be pleasantly surprised. After all, when we lose randomness, we lose that bit of serendipity in life, which makes it more interesting.
A Pom down under AMY CLAIRE THOMPSON WRITER
I am sitting in my literature tute, and I am utterly lost. It’s not that I’m bad at literature – I’d probably not be here if I was bad at literature – and it’s not that I’ve not done the reading. I have. In fact, I really enjoyed the novel that we’re studying this week, but I’m still lost. It feels a little bit like I’m drowning. I know that I’m probably imagining it, but it feels like people are staring at me, and wondering why I’m not making suggestions. After all, there are only so many times you can pull the “I’m new!” or “I’m foreign!” cards before they start to become old news, and people start to accept you... which, usually, would be a good thing. This time, though, the “I’m foreign!” excuse would actually be legitimate. I am studying
www.woroni.com.au
Australian literature, and the class’ discussion is focussing on things that I have absolutely no idea about. I didn’t notice them when I read the book because they’ve just never crossed my path before. But, apparently the concept of “the tracker” was more than just a passing character. Apparently, he was a cultural symbol, and worthy of discussion. I feel a bit stupid for not knowing this. I’m not alone, though. Other exchange students I know also have the “drowning feeling”, in other classes. We’re on exchange, and so obviously we’re here to learn about Australia, and obviously none of us are in our first year. Theoretically, we should know what we’re talking about. The thing is, we’re struggling with things domestic students presumably take for granted. We’re struggling because we weren’t brought up here, and because we don’t have the innate knowledge that comes with
growing up somewhere. We don’t know, for example, about traditions and stereotypes, and where the differences lie. We don’t automatically see things with a “post-colonial” perspective. Growing up in Britain, I knew very little about our former Empire until university. It’s almost as if it’s been brushed under the carpet, forgotten about. I know that I’ll get there. I know that I won’t feel like I’m drowning forever. I have ten and a half months left to find my feet properly, and when I get home, I intend to be cultured. Properly cultured. When I get back to studying boring old British literature, and all of this is utterly useless to me again, I will know it. It won’t matter academically, but I’d like to think that it will make me a more rounded person. Or, that’s what the Study Abroad lecture told me, last semester.
CULTURE
22
Bon voyeurage ROSE BOLLARD WRITER
Since moving to Canberra five years ago, I have been deprived of one of my greatest loves - public transport. I was oblivious to my passion until recently when I spent some time in Sydney and Melbourne where public transport was the cheapest and most convenient method of transport. While the environmental and convenience factors have long been the most heralded attributes of public transport, I realised its greatest and most unique feature is the people-watching environment it provides. Some might say people-watching is a creepy activity for the easily amused, I say that it is the activity of keen observers with an interest in people. Public transport is the kingdom of people watching and often unappreciated. People, particularly the most
extroverted and quirky, seem uninhibited by sharing with the rest of the bus, their conversations, complaints and shouts. At its best, you’ll witness a phone breakup, at its less interesting you’ll have someone like my Mum ring their daughter to make the “I’m just on the bus” phone call. There is always a key bus character for any given bus route. I distinctly remember at high school, our key bus character was a woman in a floor-length skirt with a single button holding it together and revealing her floral underwear. She would sit behind people, sneeze into their hair and then glare at them once they turned around. Non-regular buses users were easily identified, as they were delighted at being able to nab the last seat in front of her. Some may suggest that one should not become so excited about people-watching on public transport because it can be enjoyed anywhere – at a pub, the supermarket or Union Court.
These are, of course, key peoplewatching venues. However on public transport you are not purely surrounded by your own demographic, particularly if your bus passes through different kinds of suburbs. There are, of course, some venues which unite almost all Canberrans: a doctor’s waiting room, Medicare and the RTA. In the first scenario, everyone is diseased which is not great for people-watching. In the second and third situations, everyone is fed up with waiting in a queue. This is why public transport provides the best, although of course not the perfect, people watching venue. My stumpy legs, dodgy bike and occasional car have removed any necessity for me to take public transport in Canberra. While I’m unlikely to switch to a more inconvenient transport method, I am now well aware, that when I must call upon public transport, I will appreciate it for much more than the primary service it provides. Just don’t stare.
DO YOU LOVE TO READ? ARE YOU FUNCTIONALLY LITERATE?
Woroni Book Club Come along to the second meeting of the Woroni Book Club! When? Wednesday 28th September Where? Wig and Pen We’ll be talking about The Man With Two Left Feet, by P.G. Wodehouse. More info? Email us at woroni@anu.edu.au.
CULTURE
23
Dead at last
Surprise! REVIEW: TASUKE 122 Alinga Street, City
SIMON THOMPSON EDITOR
It’s no secret that the Japanese aren’t renowned for their desserts. The French have mousses, parfaits and brulees, the Italians tiramisu and the Thais tapioca. So, it came as no surprise when we asked for dessert menus at Tasuke, the waiter blushed a little. More on that later. But to begin with, this has to be the most heavily regulated restaurant I’ve ever been to. The rules are stamped in multicolour, on laminated A4, repeated several times for emphasis. Minimum spends are enforced; don’t even think about only having one dish between two; and you can forget about taking a photo. Hang on, who are the Japanese to say that we can’t take photos? There’s something very clean, literally Zen about Japanese food. Tasuke was slightly reverent: despite being full, it was deathly quiet and peaceful. You’d think several conversations over the communal tables would generate
some competing decibels, but not so. Tasuke is more of a feast for the eyes than the ears. The walls are littered with the aforementioned rules, but also a plethora of photos of the dishes covering the front window. Someone even busted out the Derwents and hand drew an illustrated specials board. It’s, um… unique. We start with a couple of Asahi beers, nicely priced at $6, and left things in the hands of our very competent waiter. He insisted we begin with a seaweed salad. Candy green strips of the stuff are served cold with a dressing of soy and sesame oil. The balance of sesame is perfect, and the result is an intriguing dish. Impressive start, though the portion could have been more generous. Second are octopus balls. Croquettes of flour and potato starch containing a small segment of grilled octopus are rolled and then fried. They’re about half the size of a golf ball, and you get about half a dozen of them. The firm octopus flesh is an interesting partner to the soft dumpling – they’re delicious. A head of grilled octopus with ginger, sesame and spring onions is truly exceptional. It’s one of my favourite dishes in Canberra – the large clumps of ginger add heat and the chargrill flavour is deeply engrained in the flesh. I
could have eaten several. Lightly fried silken tofu in broth is similarly good – the crisp surface of the tofu is lightly blistered from the frying; the inside is wondrously light. The broth is exceedingly salty, the spring onions adding a welcome touch of sweetness. Good gear. Which makes the combination egg noodles with beef, prawns and mixed vegetables so puzzling. It’s something you’d see at a cheap Chinese restaurant: bland, heavy and uninspiring. But it was dessert where the surprise of the night surfaced. After practically sending up a flare to get our plates cleared, all I was after was some home-made ice cream, which they had. But it was at the waiter’s suggestion of an off-menu sundae when curiosity got the better of my mate. A black sesame ice cream sundae appeared a few minutes later in all its American-diner glory: a retro sundae glass hit the table: ice cream adorned with pressurised cream, canned peaches and, get this, a bed of Coco Pops cereal. Huh? But again, you don’t go Japanese for dessert. At least the quality of the food at Tasuke, in general, gives you an excuse to skip it.
www.woroni.com.au
Mortein kills off Louie the Fly ZID MANCENIDO OUTREACH SUBEDITOR
After fifty-four years, Louie the Fly has finally been exterminated by “more smart, more safe” Mortein. The grubby mosquito with the purple hat and five’o’clock shadow has been the face of the bug spray since 1957, making him the star of Australia’s longest continuous-running ad campaign. Mortein cited their changing focus towards highlighting the “high-tech nature of Mortein’s products” as the primary reason for not reviving him for the next campaign. Reckitt Beckinser marketing director Chris Tedesco conceded that he no longer represents the brand’s broader range, saying: “It was a hard decision, but Mortein has decided to kill off Louie the Fly once and for all. Mortein has advanced throughout the years and we believe it’s time our face did as well. Mortein now kills cockroaches, spiders, mosquitoes, ants, silverfish, and many more
pests… Louie can no longer showcase the advancements of the complete Mortein range.” (Cheers, advertising companies, for thinking we’re all so stupid to believe that Mortein can only kill mosquitos because of Louie. What about all his friends that are always really dumb and either fly into the fire or who run away with him? If anything, the ads have only taught me that only really hot housewives can use Mortein. sprays..) Actor Ross Higgins, 81, the voice of Louie for the past fifty years was mournful at the announcement: “Nothing ever lasts forever. It is a sad farewell to an iconic and loveable character. I guess Louie finally ran out of lives but he can be proud of a very good innings.” Louie the Fly was created by award-winning novelist Bryce Courtney, while still a copywriter for McCann Erickson. Courtney thought up the original mascot and jingle in the back of a taxi (whose driver’s name was Louie) on his way to the pitch to Mortein executives.
SPORT
24
Success, thy name is arrogance MURRAY ROBERTSON WRITER
With the London Olympics looming next year, countries worldwide will begin their exhaustive search to find their best athletes and, whilst sport is usually viewed singularly as a physical contest, the increasing importance of sports psychologists says otherwise. The mental aspect of sport, having lived so long in the shadows of physical performance, has slowly become one of the most important ingredients in the recipe for victory. The Olympics are the ultimate stage where mental strength becomes a factor, purely because the weight of four years hangs over each competitor, each one knowing that one mistake, one slip up, will mean four years of wasted effort. The landscape of sporting history is littered with failure: failure linked not to athletes capabilities, but rather to their mental ineptitude. The South African cricket team’s 1999 World Cup mix up, Ian Thorpe false-starting in the 2004 Olympic Trials, a mistake rectified by Craig Stevens selfless gesture, Greg Norman’s 1996 Master’s meltdown, Ron Clarke inability to win Olympic Gold, the list is endless and humiliating. The latest showcase of mental failure has been the All Blacks and their
disturbing lack of success at the World Cup. New Zealand are usually expected to beat every Rugby Union team in the world, yet when it comes down to sudden death, winner-takes-all finals, they have been found wanting. Seeing as they are coming into this World Cup with years of failure in their minds, do not be surprised to see them stumble again, with their
mental burdens being too much to overcome. One country that cannot be overlooked in this analysis of mental strength is the sporting culture of the USA. Regardless of the view that this author holds of Americans, which is one of unlimited arrogance, they have been the worlds dominant sporting power and it starts with, I hate to
say it: arrogance. The American’s have bred into their society an unwavering belief that they are better then anyone else, and it is this beautifully brutal combination that allows Kanye West to say that if they rewrote the Bible he would be in it, or Kobe Byrant to say that “I dont want to be the next Michael Jordan, I only want to be Kobe Bryant”.
Arrogance is the cornerstone of mental strength. It is that belief in yourself, that belief in your team that can be the difference between winning and losing. If you are of the opinion that some athletes are modest, then you are naïve; every professional athlete that wants to be a champion has an unwavering, unbreakable belief in themselves, which can sometimes be construed as arrogant. I am not saying that the key to winning is to be arrogant, but the key to winning is to back yourself, to believe in yourself. On the last day of the 1996 Masters, Greg Norman, even though he was 6 shots ahead, lost belief in himself and consequently lost, in what will go down in history as one of the worlds worst chokes. If we look at Roger Federer, the greatest tennis player the world has seen, we will also find an incredibly arrogant individual, which he hides behind thinly veiled humility. Thus, the trait of arrogance, whilst producing some absolute d***heads, will just as likely produce some champions, and in some cases, you’ll get both, just ask Kobe Bryant/ Lebron James/ Lance Armstrong (jokes).
WORONI PRESENTS
The Great Election Debate 4.30PM Monday 26th September ANU Bar
In case of rain, check the Facebook page (“Woroni’s ANUSA Election Debate”) for updated venue details. You can also submit questions for candidates via the event page.
SPORT
25
The Woroni Sports Guide with Long John Silver
What
When
Where
Why
Australia vs. Russia
1st October, 13:30
Somewhere on Fox Sports
Feel-good viewing!
Wales vs. Fiji
2nd October, 16:00
Also on Fox Sports
Entertainment value
Quarter Finals!
8th/9th October, 16:00 & 18:30
Hazard a guess?
Because I said so
GRAND FINAL
2nd October, 17:00
Channel 9, or ANZ Stadium
The sultry tones of Ray Warren’s commentary.
GRAND FINAL
1st October, I assume at 14:00?
Channel Ten, or the MCG
Apparently it’s quite popular in Melbourne.
Newcastle vs. Melbourne Heart Melbourne Victory vs. Sydney Brisbane vs. Central Coast
16:30 8th October 18:30 19:45
Fox Sports 1/2/3
Gold Coast vs. Wellington Perth vs. Adelaide
9th October 16:00 16:30
Because people somewhere like watching soccer... football
Team of the Fortnight WILL WALTON
7. Lleyton Hewitt. The evertenacious-if-perhaps-a-littleagricultural Hewitt has lambasted claims that his retirement is nigh, claiming that he intends to play on indefinitely. Good for that dude. When asked why, Hewitt took a sip of water, adjusted his Cochlear implant, and asked if the question could be repeated slowly.
SPORTS SUBEDITOR
1. Sports fans around Australia. What a scrumptious buffet of sporting delicacies to delight even the most discerning of degenerates over spring: AFL finals, NRL finals, the Rugby World Cup, opening rounds of the NFL and A-League, test cricket, major league baseball, college football, and competitive table tennis… consequently this writer now requires a fresh pair of shorts. 2. Eliota Fuimaono-Sapolu. Apparently Samoan centre Sapolu was quite peeved with the scheduling of matches at the World Cup, after Samoa were only allowed a 3-day turnaround to face a 7-day rested Welsh team. That’s all well and good. According to his Twitter page it was unjust and unfair. Still well and good. He also suggested it was “like the Holocaust, like Apartheid”. Not so well and good.
3. Fernando Torres. OK, so Torres hasn’t had the dandiest time since transferring to Chelsea in January… for a cool $AUD 76 million. Perhaps you’d expect a little more than two goals thus far for that kind of pay-cheque. What you might not expect is the unfathomable, unthinkable, unimaginable (guess who found their thesaurus) open-goal miss he conjured against Man U. My 3-year-old niece would have had a hard time missing that goal… whilst atop a lion, facing backwards, translating Nietzsche and listening to a Dora the Explorer audiobook.
4. Darren Lockyer’s Mother. A worried Mrs Lockyer (Sharon to those who know her) looks to be the largest obstacle, figuratively of course, in the path of Locky playing against Manly despite a fractured cheekbone held together by 3 titanium plates. Apparently some of the lads in the opposition might be “disrespectful and maim him”. Bombshell. This is, naturally, contrary to the usually incontrovertibly high level of respect and gamesmanship in the NRL.
www.woroni.com.au
5. The A-League. Apparently the A-League starts up again soon. Ain’t that swell. I’d watch it, but unfortunately Australian soccer triggers my narcolepsy. Ah well. 6. The Irish Rugby Team. The Woeful Wallies, as the ever-witty New Zealand press anointed them, suffered a shock loss to O’Driscoll and his band of brigands at Eden Park. Thankfully this columnist has just enough Irish heritage to jump the sinking Australian ship. It seems only fitting, therefore, to tell all doting Aussie fans to sùgh ort. If you were wondering: that’s Gaelic for suck it.
8. Christiano Ronaldo. Real Madrid’s Portuguese star has come up with a theory Conan-Doyle would be proud of, concerning why match referees sometimes give him the short straw. From the horse’s mouth: “I think it’s because I’m rich, handsome and a great player. They envy me”. That’s cute. It’s kind of like Bob Katter saying people don’t like him because he still has a mostlyfull head of hair. You feel there might be more to it…
BACK PAGE YOU CAN’T REVIEW THAT! with JAMIE FREESTONE
with Farzaneh Edraki
26
CONGRATULATIONS
WORONI PRESENTS
THE BACK PAGE INVITATIONAL
Send answers to any of these to woroni@anu.edu.au; the answer we judge to be the best will receive a bag of coffee. All answers will be published online at www.woroni.com.au
Congratulations to last week’s winners, Ellie Heffernan, who dubbed the UC “Australia’s Super Tafe”, and Andaleeb Akhand, who suggested this as the title of Dick Cheney’s new memoir: How I Managed Five Draft Deferments and Still Wound Up As Secretary of State.
CAPTION IT
University University is a follow-up to High School, which was an angst-ridden compilation album with a mix of nihilistic punk songs, naive love ballads and a lot of weird spoken word crap about finding one’s identity. University is a much better effort and the album opens with “O-Week”, a tune about making mistakes and the freaks you macked on with, which pops up again and again as a clever leitmotif throughout the album. Track two continues the fun with “Sense of Possibilities”, which, although short, does provide a nice lead-in to “Readjusting Future Plans”; that song is all about dropping courses, changing degrees, disappointing your parents and realising that you won’t ever effect any meaningful change in the world. “Youth Allowance” is a pretty effective blues number all about that level of student poverty that means you’re richer than most humans who have ever lived, but are still depressed because you can’t afford to buy a Mimco bag or drink anything other than goon. The experimental track “Drug Use” is intense but overall you probably regret listening to it, while track seven (“Class”) and eight (“Study”) are in that dead part of the album you normally skip. The single from the album is the feelgood pop hit, “Party”, which will have you dancing, but you’ll be right back down again when it transitions into the next track, “Hangover” and you’ll go even lower with “Loss of Self-Esteem Upon Remembering How You Debased Yourself Last Night”, which is a 12 minute dirge you think is never going to end. The worst song, however, is the nausea inducing noise track called “Student Politics”, which consisted mainly of whiny, irrelevant vocals but which the singers clearly thought were important: they’re not. One of the most effective tracks is a trance effort called “Feelings of Superiority Over Uneducated People and an Ever Growing Sense of Elitism” which you only really appreciate once the album is over, but is perhaps the most satisfying part of this work. The album closes with “Graduation” an over-sentimental power ballad you wish would wrap up earlier. There is a hidden track tacked on the end called “Qualifications” but it doesn’t really seem to be relevant to the rest of the album. Better than going straight into FullTime Employment (a turgid double-album).
SLOGANEERING
CANBERRADIATION
Our southerly sister city, Queanbeyan, often gets a bad rap. Come up with a slogan worthy of a Getaway! tourism ad.
Imagine that radiation from the chemical explosion in Mitchell had given Canberrans a superpower. What would that superpower be, and why?
ANTI-CUTE OVERLOAD Dear Woroni,
taunted with tomatoes too tough for their hillbilly gums. Well, enough is enough.
OK, idiots. I know you humans think I’m cute. Adorable, even. Loveable. You’ve seen “Nyan Cat”. You’ve seen “Kittens on a Slide” (you know the one: unnaturally tiny fluffballs mewing incessantly as they go down play equipment). You’re the kind of numbnut responsible for the unfathomable popularity of “Otters Holding Hands”. It’s because of you that cats worldwide wear decorative bonnets, and turtles are
It’s time you dipshits realised a little something we in the Animal Kingdom like to call: reality. Don’t be fooled by these debonair whiskers and endearing, Puss-In-Boots gaze: I’m a straight-up beast. I mean, check out this tissue box I’ve so bad-assedly crafted into protective armour. As soon as I figure out how to extricate my paws from it, I’ll be ready for anything. COME AT ME. Did you know cats are related to lions? Yes, dickwad, that’s right: I’m the King of the Jungle. So next time you come across one of us, and offer up a patronising “Oh! How sweet!” or “Can you haz cheezburger?” – you would do well to remember a few famous felines from history. In no particular order: Felix, Pink Panther, Simba, Mr. Mistoffelees. I’m no pussy; I’m your furry nightmare. Sincerely, Mittens
WORONI BOOKSHELF ANTI-CUTE OVERLOAD
10
TOP TEN Things You Won’t Overhear During the 2011 ANUSA Elections 10. Why, yes! I would like a flyer! How considerate. 9. Union Court is so empty lately. Where is everyone? I’m practically whizzing from God’s to MCC without a care in the world. 8. I completely understand the difference between NUS and ANUSA. 7. On that note, aren’t acronyms great? I’m totally keeping up with them all: SORF, CASS, and so on. 6. This is so much more entertaining than O-Week. 5. This is so much more entertaining than Bush Week. 4. That ticket’s name doesn’t sound at all like a brand of dishwashing liquid. 3. Ergh. Not another free BBQ! This is the worst part of the whole week. 2. I’ve never felt more stimulated and/ or motivated. 1. I haven’t had the urge to nipple cripple a candidate at least once during the entire election period.
A
General_representatives_) GOLDEN TICKET Ben McMullin
STIMULATE Caitlin Delbridge
Most admirable politician: “has to be Pericles. People bandy around phrases like original gangster quite a lot but this guy definitely takes the cake.”
“If I was Ian Young I would address the issue of student accommodation by implementing means of having more student accommodation that meets basic student needs.”
Harry Wall
Ruby Fitzmaurice
“I like my sausages Saucy, Juicy and Glossy.”
Amanda ‘AJ’ Neilson
“My mother always told me…It’s not you I don’t trust, it’s those around you”
“My mother always told me to always look at the big picture, never trust people who don’t laugh and not to facebook after a bottle of wine.”
Tom Nock
Nic McMaster
If I were Ian Young, I would invest more into teachers to ensure that ANU attracts the very best students.
“I aim to create stronger ties between ANUSA and the residential halls and colleges of ANU.”
Kai Kamada-Laws
“I aim to work closely with ANUSA to ensure that there are healthy food options that are sustainable and affordable.”
Nick Barry
“My mother always told me... if you eat your vegetables, you’ll grow up big and tall. At 6ft 10’, I think I ate enough.”
Johnson Guan
“I want to continue my work with the iDiscount team to ensure that every student has an equal opportunity to have a student discount card for free.”
Samantha Teong
“I am committed about ensuring that courses at the ANU are taught in an efficient and interesting manner.
Lilly Ward
What would you do as a gen rep? “If I am elected as a gen rep I will remain committed to advocating for better mental health services at ANU and awareness of mental health issues on campus. “
Aizaz Syed
“I feel that I’m an approachable person who cares greatly about the views, feelings and opinions of others and will work hard to represent them in the position of Gen rep.”
Simone Proctor
“I am passionate about social opportunities and increasing student welfare to ensure that all students have access to the services that they need. “
Alex Clark
“If I were a gen rep, I would do my best to ensure that ANUSA effectively used and promoted student resources, and work more closely with halls and colleges.”
Charmaine Yong
“My momma always told me that life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get… until you open that box of chocolates?”
ACTIVATE! Ryan Turner
“My Dad would never accept a sausage unless it was almost burnt right through, and neither will I.”
Sung Yang
Boreas Hu
A good suasage is good, tasty and many people would like to have it. However, it would be great if there can have many other BBQ meals.
Arisha Arif
If I were Ian Young I’d try to secure more courses that aren’t offered at other Australian universities (such as “Lady Gaga and the Sociology of Fame” as offered at the University of South Carolina). I would also look to introduce new degrees such as Philosophy, Politics and Economics (PPE).
My mother always told me: to treat others as you’d like to be treated.
Ryan Turner
I represented ANU at NUS National Conference in 2010 and I won’t be afraid to speak up on your behalf when it counts.
Raveena Toor
NUS is an inspiring environment to be in, and something I would love the opportunity to contribute to.
Brett Jones
Caitlin Delbridge
My mother always told me to “relax more and get more sleep” because I’m constantly on the go.
Ruby Fitzmaurice
What’s the best movie of all time? Donne Darko
Michael Hiscox
If you were Ian Young, what is one thing you’d change about the ANU? Increase the diversity and depth of courses that ANU offers. ANU is the best university in Australia and our courses should reflect that.
Michael Pettersson
My mother always told me…I was her favourite child; needless to say, I’m a better person because of it.
STOOD UP! Louisa Osborne
Marissa Zhang
Ben Koval
Anna Mallard
Who is the politician you most admire? The French political scientist, Rousseau, who has enlightened me with the idea that democracy is not only about gaining individual power, but also the responsibility associated with every little bit of power obtained.
LEFT ACTION Ridah Hassan is running as a Gen Rep. See the ticket statement and question answers under “President”. ACTIVATE (cont) Andreas Sherbourne
I’ll advocate for more computer labs on campus, longer library opening hours, and more non-commercial spaces like the Brian Kenyon student space. These are changes I would make if I were the Vice-Chancellor.
Calvin Ling
I’m running as a general representative with Activate! in order to create a more inclusive community that brings domestic and international students together.
Tasnim Hossain
My mother always told me: To stand up for myself, because she couldn’t keep standing up for me forever.
Alex Bell-Rowe
The University and ANUSA need to build a more inclusive community with more activities on campus, from regular parties to public lectures and politics in the Pub.
Emily Bissaker
What would you change at ANU: Canberra’s housing crisis undermines the ability of ANU students to focus on their studies and actively engage in everything University has to offer.
Ben Gill
I like my sausages well cooked by students, for students.
Lucy Caldwell
Aidan Lloyd
My mother always told me: “Stop slouching and get on with it”
ACTIVATE
ANU cannot expect to maintain and attract students if it does not meet the most basic of needs and that is affordable, good quality student housing.
I like my sausages smothered in onion!
I’m committed to a better social scene on campus and supporting clubs and societies with the training and What would you change at ANU: The breadth resources they need to make 2012 the biggest (and and depth of courses offered at ANU is wildest) year we’ve seen at ANU yet! narrowing, while tutorials and lectures are unengaging. Students need greater degree flexibility and a broader range of courses to choose from
Sascha Silberstein
We want to see the NUS become the centre of student activism in Australia. Unaligned to the political parties in parliaments, we are prepared to stand up for student rights in the face of a Labor or Coalition government on issues such as declining per student funding for education, the attacks on the independence of students’ associations and SRCs, and the homophobic federal ban on LGBTI marriage rights.
ACTIVATE Tom Knock
NUS needs to facilitate better networking and information sharing between campuses and collectives, and deliver results for students.
Michael Pettersson
Tim Lamusse
Sausage: well done, like the policies Activate! are running on
LEFT ACTION Ridah Hassan, Callum Brindley and Anton Cu Unjieng. They provided the following joint statement:
Activate! has bold plans to advocate for major improvements in student welfare and services and NUS provides a forum through which to raise the concerns of ANU students, particularly queer* students, at a national level..
With the Student Services and Amenities Fee coming in next year, I want to ensure that the Dan Payten revenue raised is spent effectively and benefits My mother always told me: “You can do better” those students who need it most.
Ben Koval
Nus_delegates_)
STOOD UP! Georgia Marjoribanks
My mother always told me: that Mr Whippy only played music when it had run out of ice-cream.
I’m keen to represent ANU students at the NUS National Conference because our views need to be heard on the national level.
Isobel Morphy-Walsh
Having represented indigenous students as ANUSA’s Indigenous Officer in 2011, I have the experience and courage to advocate for much-needed changes to NUS campaigns and policies.
Jared Mitchell (Independent)
I’m keen to further NUS’ campaign for a national student concession card, and work hard with the National Welfare Officer towards the abolition of youth wages, which prejudice the interests of young people.
Emily Bissaker (Independent)
I’m committed to working to ensure that all students have a voice on issues that directly affect them, particularly student accommodation, transport and parking.
NUS’ ‘Talk about it: Women’s Safety Survey’ highlighted that safety on campus is an issue at universities across the country. At ANU, we need to create a safer campus, particularly in the night time, by investing in better security and better lighting
Georgia Marjoribanks I’m not a member of a faction, nor a member of a political party, but I am passionate about higher education policy, student welfare, and equity
Emma Erisken At last year’s national conference, not a single bow tie wearing woman was spotted -- that’s a change that I can believe in.
Alice Crawford I want to represent students’ views on a range of issues, from youth allowance to the quality of education and issues facing women on campus.