Woroni Edition 10 2015

INTERNATIONAL VOL. 67

Issue #10

LEAD STORY: PAGE 3.

The Pledge: ANU Says No to Violence Against Women - Lizzie Storor PAGE 4.

Saving Myannmar Through Food - Jason Liu PAGE 6.

ANU Alumna Launches Campaign Against Domestic Violence - Miguel Galsim

PAGE 12.

Bleach

- Nishant Pathy

PAGE 17.

Vietnamese Culinary Delights: Not Just “Pho” - Jenny Bui PAGE 25.

Woroni Radio Presents: Not Quite Disco - Finn Pëdersén

WORONI SEMESTER 2 - WEEK 5, 2015 - WORONI.COM.AU - FACEBOOK, TWITTER & THE APP STORES

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WORONI No.10 Vol.67

CONTENTS No. 10 3.

The Pledge: ANU Says No to Violence Against Women - Lizzie Storor

9.

Science Circus Africa Project - Ria Pflaum

Four Hour Exams Too Long - Anna Kaufmann 4.

Saving Myannmar Through Food - Jason Liu

10.

ANU Alumna Launches Campaign Against Domestic Violence - Miguel Galsim Femenism

7.

8.

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- Kathy Wu

Reimagining Union Court - Ria Pflaum UN Women Specialist Speaks at ANU - Miguel Galsim Take it Off! Stripping Back Societal and Legal Perceptions of Consent - Anna Macdonald

The Raunchy Side of Afghanistan - Vishesh Agarwal Domestic Violence Agaisnt Women in Australia - Liam Fitzpatrick

#Stand4Freedom - Sarah Edwards 6.

Gender and Development at Parliament House - Miguel Galsim

11.

12.

13.

International Liftout Cover - Photography by Nic Bills Bleach - Nishanth Pathy Observations from Athens - John Goldie

14.

International Love - Paroksh Prasad

15.

A Home Away From Home - Jamie Chong & Benjamin-Henry Bek Zhan Hao

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

A Trip to the Heart of Africa - Caitlin Magee & Matthew Teh

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Vietnamese Culinary Delights: Not Just “Pho” - Jenny Bui The Future of Democracy in Malaysia - Andaleeb Akhand Colliding for Answers: The Future of Particle Physics - Maxwell Jones From Canberra to Tokyo: Trading Books for the Lab - Betty Xiong

The Devil’s Advocate - Naureen Fatima Hossain A Poem - Liam Swales

Are We Sharing Music or Appropriating It? - Gabriele Naktinyte Do I Sound Gay? - Jessica Masters Real News, Fake News, No News: What’s the Difference?

- Pramilaa Shivankkumar

25.

26.

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Ink Remix - Louise Keast Stepping Up: The Australian Ceramics Triennale - Abbey Jamieson

22.

23.

27.

28.

Woroni Radio Presents: Not Quite Disco - Finn Pëdersén

Gig Review: Death Cab For Cutie at ANU Bar - Rachel Holland Gig Review: 30/70, Erah, Low Flung and Zander Gecko at La De Da - Jared Espot What Australia’s Ashes Defeat Has Really Taught Us About...Life - Easy Listing Yes, Another Adam Goodes Article - Kunal Vankadara

Physiotherapy: A Public Service Announcement - Zeno of Elea New Research Reveals Fire Drills as Cause of Brain Cancer - Ivana Smojver

A C K N O W L E D G M E N T S ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF COUNTRY

BOARD OF EDITORS

S TA F F

SUB-EDITORIAL TEAM

Woroni is published on the land of the Ngunnawal people.

Editor-in-Chief - Jacob Ingram Deputy Editor-in-Chief Giordi Borzuola

Administrative Assistant Simone Proctor

Science - Maxwell Jones Comment - Vishesh Agarwal Features - Vincent Chiang Satire & World - Ivana Somjver Arts & Reviews - Louise Keast Arts & Reviews - Jessica Masters Life & Style - Paroksh Prasad Sports - Zach Mackey International - Virginia Harding Radio - Kate Lawrence Radio - Caitlin Magee Radio - Finn Pedersen Radio - Sam Skinner Design - Joanne Leong IT - Manab Chetia Photography - Nic Bills Videography - Julia Faragher News Correspondent - Anna Kaufmann News Correspondent - Miguel Galsim News Correspondent - Ria Pflaum

‘Woroni’ translates to ‘mouthpiece’ in the Ngunnawal language.

Advertising inquiries and submissions can made at: advertising@woroni.com. au Phone: (02) 6125 9574 Shop 15, Lena Karmel Building 26 Barry Drive, Acton 2601

Managing Editor - Mitchell Scott

Proofreader - Siobhonn Shannon Book keeper - Brendan Ofner

Creative Director - Rashna Farrukh News Editor - Waheed Jayhoon Contributions Editor Benedicte O’Leary Rutherford Multimedia Editor Maddalena Easterbrook Radio Editor - Isaac Dugdale

Woroni is printed by Capital Fine Print.

Woroni would like to apologise to Sophie Jones. The article “PARSA President Promises Change” was mis-attributed to Anna Kaufmann in our last edition.

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Week 5, Semester 2, 2015.

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THE PLEDGE: ANU SAYS NO TO VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN CAMPUS NEWS Week three of this semester was dedicated to encouraging members of the ANU community to take “The Pledge” and stand against violence and harassment of women. Led by the ANUSA Women’s Department, informational banners were distributed around Union Court and at residential colleges, and the evening of August 7 saw a screening of The Mask I live In. The prevalence of violence and harassment against women in contemporary Australian society has traditionally been removed from public consciousness. The past few years, however, has seen the issue landing far more media attention than previous decades.

Helen Brereton, from the Women’s

LIZZIE STOROR Domestic Violence Court Advocacy Service in NSW, contended that the issue was a prevalent one. Campaigns targeting domestic violence have been launched nationwide by government agencies and at universities, including the ANU, to bring attention to what Brereton described as an “epidemic”.

Farha presented an overview of UN Women’s work to address violence against women around the world. UN Women’s mandate to work in both developing and developed countries distinguishes it from many other UN subsidiaries, given that humanitarian work is typical exclusive to developing countries. However, the frequency of domestic violence against women occurs at similar rates across the world, irrespective of nations’ position on the Human Development Index (HDI).

On Tuesday 4th August, the Gender Institute presented a lecture on UN Women’s efforts to combat violence against women. The talk, while not part of the official “Pledge Week” schedule, was nonetheless timely in its occurrence. Tania Farha was the guest speaker, who, prior to her appointment as a policy specialist at the Ending Violence against Women Section, worked with the Victorian Police Force to implement reform programs against domestic violence.

One in three women over the age of 15 experience violence during their lifetime, a rate which has increased since 1995.

When quizzed on the rising rates, Farha highlighted the gap between the creation of programs to address

the issue and the ineffectiveness of attempts to implement them. To address these gaps in implementation, Farha stressed the need for an increased knowledge base, accountability and accessibility to services for victims of violence.

On a much smaller scale at the ANU, a similar approach is being taken. ANUSA Women’s Officer Loren Ovens said that “The Pledge Week” engendered “a dialogue that shapes our culture in a positive way and empowers members of our community to speak out against any form of violence on campus”. As Ovens stressed; “Everyone has a role to play in making our campus safe and being an ethical bystander.”

FOUR HOUR EXAMS TOO LONG CAMPUS NEWS

ANNA KAUFMANN

The Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic), Professor Marnie Hughes-Warrington, said she was “disappointed” to hear that some students are being subjected to exams as long as four hours at the ANUSA-run Ed Talk: Stress and Assessment held late last month.

another 4% have to handle three exams back to back, and that this is never a desirable situation. She also said that an audit conducted last year at the ANU found that the number of exam-based assessment has increased but the number of courses offered has not.

speak up and go talk to the dean,” the Professor said.

This was not the only issue raised at the discussion focussing on the intersection of assessments and stress, with students also noting the existence of many exams within a short exam period timeframe, and heavily weighted assessments, as particularly significant stressors.

As a result of this, Professor Hughes-Warrington said that they had made it clear to teachers that while two exams for a course is okay, exceeding that isn’t. However, she said the situation was a difficult one as every discipline at the ANU does things slightly differently, and that “it’s difficult when you have a discipline that wants assessment authentic to the discipline”.

Hughes-Warrington also offered to ask the registrar to monitor lengths of exams, and raised that there is now improved communication between colleges to not schedule exams and assessments at the same time and that the special consideration has been centralised.

However, unlike previous Ed Talks held on issues such as fee deregulation, safety and on-campus harassment, which have been problem-solving focussed sessions, there was little to come out of the Ed Talk on stress and assessment.

Rather, it acted more as a promotion of university services already in existence due to the small sample size of students that attended the event.

Professor Hughes-Warrington said that 10% of students have to deal with back to back exams, and

“The other side is that there are people who aren’t completely honest with us, but 99 percent of people are honest and we need to be empathetic.”

A number of stories were also shared by students regarding examples of people who had managed to slip through the cracks of ANU’s special assessment policies regarding illness and unexpected circumstances.

In response, Professor HughesWarrington highlighted the role of the Dean of Students and the ability of students to appeal against decisions they feel are unfair.

However, discussion became more progressive in nature when ANUSA President Ben Gills put forward the question of whether exambased assessment remained the best evaluation of course knowledge, or whether it was time to focus on other mediums. Professor Hughes-Warrington said that such a discussion was worth exploring, but that ultimately it comes down to the degree, the skills that need to be tested, and what the best ways to examine those skills are.

“I’m really pleased when students

However, the Professor did show

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great favour towards the growing use of differential assessment, where students are allowed to choose the form of their own assessment, whether it be an essay, take-home, or traditional examination. She stated that she was “a big fan” of the type of assessment as it “acknowledges people have different strengths and give students options”, and that she would like to see more courses organise their assessment that way.

Overall, the discussion led to the idea that stress is just something that students have to deal with, especially given that the ANU has a lot of high achievers in one place, making it a breeding ground for stress and anxiety. Students instead need to look at stress management, and utilise the Counselling Centre when needed.

Carolyn Farrar, Head of the Counselling Centre, highlighted that students go to the Centre for a wide range of completely routine reasons, and that things don’t have to get really bad before you look for support.

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S AV I N G M Y A N N M A R THROUGH FOOD CAMPUS NEWS The ANU Myanmar Students’ Association (ANUMSA) held their “Saving Myanmar from Flood” event in Union Court on Monday 10th August.

Since June of this year, Myanmar (previously known as Burma) has been subject to widespread, monsoonal flooding which has caused significant destruction across the country. The damage was further exacerbated by Cyclone Komen, which cut a swathe through the country last week.

Up to one million people have been affected by the floods, with over 100 being killed according to the Myanmar government.

Chit Win, president of the Myanmar Students’ Association (MSA) and a PhD candidate with a significant background in Myanmar affairs, told Woroni reporters that up to 50% of

JASON LIU

Myanmar was now flooded.

Mr Win’s background includes being a Deputy Director from the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in Nay Pyi Taw and oversaw Myanmar – Thailand boundary affairs before coming to Australia.

from 9am to 1pm outside the Brian Kenyon Student Space (BKSS), where volunteers from the MSA handed out flyers providing information on the floods. Free food was provided to students as they passed by.

The second objective was to raise awareness of the floods both within and outside the ANU campus, given its limited exposure in international media.

The third objective was to send all proceeds raised to Myanmar.

“The MSA feels that we should do something to help those in need,” he said.

He added that many students in the MSA have been affected by the flooding, either personally or otherwise. Some students expressed that family members had been forced to flee their homes, while others, like some of Mr Win’s fellow PhD colleagues researching Myanmar, found that certain areas they had recently visited were completely wiped out by the floods.

“We’re trying to promote public awareness and also the raising of funds online by distributing chicken coconut noodle soup, one of our Myanmar favourite dishes, and rice cake free of charge to the students. All the cooking and ingredients are provided by ANUMSA, and the GAC also contributed to the funding.”

Though an emotional subject, Mr Win showed cheerful spirit while being interviewed.

A donation box was set up amongst the free food.

Mr Win stated that there were three main objectives behind the fundraiser event. The first was to provide intellectual input in regards to disaster management.

“You can feel the emotions [from the disaster],” he said.

The fundraiser event was held

When questioned on the turnout to the event, Mr Win pointed out that it was lunch time and free food was being provided.

“This is the place for distributing free food,” he laughed, “so we tried to choose the place quite strategically.”

Further details about ANUMSA’s campaign and donations can be found at http://www.gofundme.com/ anumsa

#STAND4FREEDOM CAMPUS NEWS

SARAH EDWARDS

In Union Court on Tuesday 4th August, you may have seen a group raising awareness of modern day slavery through the #Stand4Freedom initiative.

that the aim of the event was to “raise awareness of modern day slavery”, but she emphasised that the idea was “not just [to] make people sad”.

The event was organised on behalf of the International Justice Mission (IJM), and was focussed on encouraging people to “pass on the conversation” about slavery in the modern age.

The take-home message, she said, was that although slavery is still a current issue, there are people doing something to combat it, and there are ways in which we can all participate.

A small group of people were available from 9am until 5pm for discussions about the continuing issue of slavery, and to suggest ways in which interested students might get involved in combatting it. Participants were encouraged to photograph themselves alongside one of the placards, and to post the result to social media with the hashtag #Stand4Freedom.

Djoeandy said she wanted to address the “disconnect between the issue and the consciousness” of it by encouraging students to learn more, and “inspire them to be a part of the fight to end modern-day slavery”. This was the first event organised for IJM at the ANU, but the organisers are hoping to establish a society within the university by the end of the year for interested students.

IJM is a US-based mission with a

Organiser Rachel Djoeandy said

focus on “protecting the poor from violent oppression”.

When asked about modern day slavery, Djoeandy said: “This is a very real issue with an estimated 36 million slaves in the world today, and a quarter of forced labour victims being children.”

Roughly 14 million slaves are found in India, more than any other country in the world. Although most slaves are in situations of forced labour, approximately 22% of all victims of slavery are in the field of sex slavery.

In the modern era, slavery is often referred to as “bonded labour” or “debt bondage,” and is often initiated when a family or individual can not repay a debt, and are as such forced into slavery by way of repayment. There is also a prevalent issue of forced migrant

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labour around the world, which occurs when underprivileged people are enticed into migration by the promise of employment, only to be forced into labour under threat of harm to either themselves or their families.

Participants in #Stand4Freedom were encouraged to “think about [their] purchases”, as a way to make a difference to modern-day slavery. Djoeandy flagged fashion in particular as an area in which it’s possible to find affordable Australian alternatives which have reduced the risk of modern-day slavery and recommended online “Ethical Fashion Guides” to find out more. Other fields that have been found to have a high rate of slavery involved in production include cars, chocolate, computers and mobile phones.

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2016 ALUMNI AWARDS Do you know an inspirational graduate or student who has made an outstanding contribution to their community in Australia or internationally? Nominate them for the University’s Alumni Awards. > > > > > > >

Alumnus of the Year Alumnus of the Year – Philanthropy Alumnus of the Year – Innovation and Entrepreneurship Alumnus of the Year – Research or Academia International Alumnus of the Year Young Alumnus of the Year Student of the Year

Nominations close 31 October 2015

MO_AR&P15377

alumniawards.anu.edu.au

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WORONI No.10 Vol.67

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ANU ALUMNA

LAUNCHES CAMPAIGN AGAINST

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE MIGUEL GALSIM

CAMPUS NEWS A campaign entitled “This is Not a ‘Wife Beater’” (NAWB) was launched on the night of Tuesday 11th August at the ACT Legislative Assembly, with a key organisational role played by ANU alumna Alisa Draskovic. The campaign aims to challenge everyday behaviours and beliefs that condone intimate partner and family violence.

The campaign, which re-labels singlets usually referred to as “wife beaters” to “respecters”, aims to encourage a more productive discourse on domestic violence by subverting the meanings embedded in such a commonly-recognised clothing name. Photos of Canberra personalities and businesspeople wearing “respecter” singlets were exhibited.

Opening speeches were presented by Genevieve Jacobs from 666 ABC Canberra, who said that “change begins with all of us”, and introduced Aboriginal elder Aunty Janet Phillips to give an official welcome to country and moving personal account of her own experiences with partner violence. Andrew Leigh MP

followed, stating: “No one should have to go through fear and suffering in their own home.” ACT Women’s Minister Yvette Berry and prominent CEO Kylie Travers spoke, relating personal experiences of domestic violence and sexual assault, and called for attitudinal change regarding the tolerance of partner violence.

wide launch, as the initial NAWB event was held on campus while she served as Deputy Women’s Officer for the ANU Women’s Department in 2013.

A former Arts/Law student experienced in both extensive community work and as a delegate for Australia to the Commission on the Status of Women at the UN in New York, Draskovic wanted to launch NAWB on a “bigger scale”.

Draskovic, who also spoke, told Woroni that she chose the symbol of the “wife beater” because of its common usage in everyday parlance.

She acknowledged that her commitments to grassroots work and high-level policy making were almost like “two separate worlds” and wanted to utilise her “commitment to grassroots advocacy and [her] community, and [her] passion for addressing domestic violence in the community”.

“I see it as a conversation starter. It’s an accessible way to talk about domestic violence, and it’s supposed to open up people’s thinking in relation to this issue,” she said.

“The ‘wife beater’ is just one element, and it opens up a bigger conversation about how we talk about intimate partner and family violence, what kind of attitudes and myths that we hold on to.”

“For me it’s a long-term commitment.

This year is to give people a taste and to raise awareness of the campaign, and to continue to talk about the relationship between language and the existence of violence in the community... I hope every year we do bring people together and

She acknowledged that the event was just the “beginning” in terms of a Canberra-

continue talking about [the issue],” she said.

When asked about bridging the gap between words and action on domestic violence, Draskovic said that conversations “don’t take place in a vacuum. We can’t jokingly refer to violence against women and at the same time believe it’s not okay”.

She said that “One in three women since the age of 15 has experienced assault, and one in six will experience physical or sexual assault from a current or former partner. This is incredibly serious and we can’t draw a clear line between what we say and what we do. There is a relationship.”

Ultimately, Draskovic was pleased with the event and grateful to take part. “I’m incredibly grateful to the Canberra community for supporting this. I didn’t do this by myself; by no means... it really is a whole community effort.”

FEMENISM CAMPUS NEWS On Wednesday 12th August, the ANU Circle for Gender Equity held a panel discussion on the role of men in promoting gender equality. The event showcased diverse perspectives from the female and male panellists. These included Julia Diprose, ANU graduate and Communications and Media Coordinator for UN Women Australia; Dr Patrick Kilby, lecturer at the ANU School of Archaeology and Anthropology; and Tasman Bain, a White Ribbon Ambassador and social scientist at the University of Queensland (UQ).

With a mostly female audience, the event gave an optimistic yet challenging view of men’s involvement on the issue of gender inequality. The audience were informed of

KATHY WU have been initiated by women from the third world or developing countries.

some shocking facts regarding the status of women: one in three, or 35%, of women around the world will experience violence at some stage during her life, regardless of age, social class, or race.

Bain, who conversed through Skype, suggested ways in which men could engage in the discussion, including critiquing discrimination, working in solidarity, and challenging stereotypical gender roles. Directly supporting organisations that advocate for equality, and exposure to popular culture content produced by women were also amongst the ways he described. Most importantly, Bain said, they must “listen, listen and listen”.

“I believe this figure is unacceptable. I believe this figure is devastating,” Diprose commented.

The panelists expressed their alarm that this already high figure was most likely understated, with Dr. Kilby stating: “Some bloke said to me it can’t be that high - my answer is that it can’t be that low!” He then gave background information about obstacles to the feminist movements both through history and across the world, ending with the fact that many movements

All in all, the main thought taken from the panel was that little things do matter.

The panellists agreed that communication

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was the key to involving men in gender equality, as well as advancing its process.

Ultimately, it is not enough for men to just respect women, they should “speak with, and not for women”, Diprose said.

The ANU Circle for Gender Equity will be hosting another seminar on women in the academic areas of science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM) in two weeks’ time, followed by a similar discussion focusing on equal opportunities, and why men should care, on Wednesday 26th August.

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Week 5, Semester 2, 2015.

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REIMAGINING

UNION CAMPUS NEWS On Wednesday 5th August, the ANU Sustainability Learning Community (SLC) held their annual Great Green Debate, with this year’s topic exploring a vision of sustainability in the redevelopment of Union Court.

The event’s panelists brought a varied background of affiliation to both the ANU and the subject of sustainability.

This included ANUSA President Ben Gill; ANU Executive Director of Administration and Planning, Chris Grange; as well as an ANU historian; a visiting fellow; and a member of the ANU Environment Collective. The debate was moderated by Professor Peter Kanowski, a forester of the ANU Fenner School of Environment and Forestry.

In terms of the actual redevelopment, Grange revealed quite a studentcentric prioritization plan: making libraries the focus of the precinct, with a vision to turn Chifley into Union Court’s centrepiece, and new student accommodation a close second. Approximately 1500 students were turned away from on-campus accommodation last year, which he claimed indicated the necessity of new student accommodation measures.

COURT RIA PFLAUM

A plan for a re-designed Union Court would also attempt to centralize all student services, which are currently scattered around 11 different locations, into the one area. In terms of providing adequate student care, he expressed that as part of the current plan, a comprehensive health centre would take a higher priority to retail services.

the whole campus,” he said.

Speaking on the proper context of sustainability and how it fed into education, Ben Gill not only spoke on behalf of the students as President of ANUSA, but also as a student studying science and engineering.

“ANU is one of the leaders in Australia in solar research – why isn’t solar energy embedded into the structures around campus?” Gill asked.

As the director in charge of the redevelopment project, Grange stated that whilst the ANU campus has some “really good aspects”, opportunities still exist to tackle problematic issues of sustainability. Grange mentioned the Manning Clark Centre (MCC), the primary lecture theatre hub on campus, as an example; it is just one of many buildings within the Union Court vicinity that lacks the function to adapt its energy consumption based on the actual amount being used.

Panelists Prof Libby Robin, and Bart Meehan, a historian and a Fenner School Visiting Fellow, respectively, both reflected on the history of the Union Court from its inception to the present day. Meehan spoke of the “uninspiring concrete” of Union Court when it was first upgraded from a library car park, and that, “for a long time, no one came.” The last set of renovations to the Union Court area occurred in 1973 - more than 40 years ago.

However, Grange expressed that the plans were not just looking at individual buildings, but instead how “all different elements could work together in an environmental way.”

Miriam Adams-Schinminger, ANU Environment Collective member and honours student at the Fenner School, raised concerns about what would happen without proper public discussion and input on the matter.

“We want to look at the wider campus and come up with a sustainable design for the precinct - one which can serve

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She expressed concern that the Union Court precinct could become a “glorified shopping mall”, accessible and enjoyable only if you spend money.

Ben Gill, speaking to Woroni after the panel, said that as a representative to the students, although he was satisfied with the consultation process as a whole, feedback on progress was few and far between. However, he did acknowledge that although he, on ANUSA’s behalf, was fighting for students, ANU has more than just a few voices: “One person cannot represent all students – from students with disabilities to international students, everything is going to be impactful in different ways.”

Currently, the ANU campus’ carbon footprint is the worst in Australia per square metre, and despite achievements like a reduction in Chifley Library’s energy usage by 20% in the last few years, oncampus sustainability is still an issue.

However, in this regard, all panelists were convinced that Union Court redevelopment presented an exciting opportunity in tackling this issue.

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U N WO M E N S P E C I A L I S T SPEAK S AT ANU CAMPUS NEWS Tania Farha, a policy specialist with UN Women, spoke to a large audience at the Sir Roland Wilson Building on Tuesday 4th August about global efforts to end violence against women and girls.

The talk was hosted by the ANU Gender Institute in partnership the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade (DFAT), whose chief gender specialist Sally Moyle introduced Farha to an audience of professionals, academics, and students alike.

The New York-based Farha, extensively experienced in her career with UN Women, the Victorian police and the Department of Defence, among others, began by illustrating the UN’s institutional architecture for combating global violence against women. She said that this problem, “based in unequal power relationships between men and women”, continues to persist

MIGUEL GALSIM because its root causes remain unaddressed. She also blamed a “lack of political will to implement international agreements” on ending gender discrimination.

but 24th in gender equality by the World Economic Forum in 2014.

“Community responses are really critical,” she said, and “everyone has a role to play” in diminishing violence against women in Australia, even if it just means ceasing to make sexist jokes.

She also noted UN Women’s shortfall in information and data collection, and expressed the organisation’s desire to develop a “knowledge base” on violence against women internationally. Similarly, she also said service usage needed to be improved; “even in developed countries, the use of services was low” with only 14% of women afflicted by violence reporting to police and 19% reporting to other services in European countries.

Speaking to Woroni, Farha said: “Without a public dialogue on violence against women, we don’t fundamentally understand what’s at the heart of the issue, basically the unequal power relationships between men and women.”

“I think that for many years, violence against women was considered a private issue. I think it’s really important to get the issue in the public space so that people can understand it’s a social problem,” she said.

Furthermore, she spoke on Australia’s problems with gendered violence, with Australia being second on the Human Development Index (HDI) which measures life expectancy, education, and income,

“We as a whole society need to work

to address the issue of violence against women, both to respond effectively and to prevent it from happening at all.”

On the future of her career, she said: “I see myself coming back to Australia and working in the domestic context... It’s really effective to work locally as well, to be able to see projects being operationalised personally.”

Overall, Farha enjoyed speaking at the ANU, and was impressed by the student body’s interest and its informed questions.

“It was great to see so many students interested in this issue. I think we need to get more young people involved in the debate, and I think we need to bring more people into the discussion, especially young people who communicate in a different way.”

TA KE I T OFF!

STRIPPING BAC K SO C IETAL AN D L EGAL PE RC EPTIONS O F CON S E N T CAMPUS NEWS The “Take It Off! Stripping Back Societal and Legal Perceptions of Consent” panel occurred on Wednesday 12th August, as part of ANUSA’s Sex and Consent Week 2015. Its aim was to examine and discuss the social and legal structures around the idea of consent.

The panelists brought a wide range of experience and knowledge in the various aspects of the field, This included Margaret Jones, Deputy Director of the ACT Director of Public Prosecutions; Detective Sergeant David Crowe, who leads the Child Abuse section of the Sexual Assault and Child Abuse Team of the ACT Police; Nina Funnel, a journalist, author and advocate for gender equality; and Penny Pestano, the Acting Clinical Services Manager at the Canberra Rape Crisis Centre.

ANU student Ellie Greenwood moderated the discussion.

ANNA MACDONALD consent entirely for the victim, however it may also lead to an acquittal of the accused. Ultimately it becomes a question of fact for the jury. Alcohol’s role in sexual assault may also be as a tool for grooming or drink spiking, as discussed by both Ms Pestano and Ms Farnell.

Discussion covered a broad variety of topics related to sexual assault and issues of consent, from questions surrounding the procedure of reporting a sexual assault, as well as legal reformation and victim blaming. A strong message that came through in the panelists’ discussion was that sexual assault is a serious crime, is a human rights violation, and is a deeply traumatic experience for those that have survived through it.

The panel however, failed to directly address what consent meant when both parties were equally intoxicated, with a distinct emphasis from the panelists that it is difficult to discern where the line is drawn between good consent and intoxicated consent.

Ms Farnell expressed that a dialogue about what “ethical consent” includes needs to established.

Ms Pestano agreed, stating that “[consent] comes down to communication”.

The panel opened conversation about barriers to reporting sexual assault. Barriers may include knowing, living and/or studying with the offender, a sense of loyalty to their college, a fear that no one would believe the accusation, and wider societal barriers to simply

The question of intoxication and consent highlighted the complexity that surrounds these issues. Ms Jones pointed out that from a legal perspective, intoxication can negate

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reporting a sexual assault. Ms Funnel emphasised that “[these] barriers cannot be underestimated”.

There has been no survey conducted

by Australian universities into sexual assault on campus, although the ANU did lead an attempt to conduct one with the Group of Eight (Go8) institutions, which failed to gain traction. The National Union of Students (NUS) also conducted a survey in 2011, but the discussion panel showed that much more needed to be done across the board in order to effectively engage with these issues.

Canberra Rape Crisis Centre Crisis Line: (02) 6247 2525 Phone: (02) 6247 8071 Fax: (02) 6247 2536 Email: crcc@rapecrisis.org.au www.crcc.org.au

Week 5, Semester 2, 2015.

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GENDER AND DEVELOPMENT AT PARLIAMENT HOUSE NEWS On the evening of Monday 10th August, the United Nations Association of Australia (UNAA), with ANU students amongst its ranks, hosted a discussion on gender equality in post-2015 development policy at Parliament House between prominent diplomats.

Speaking at the event were the Pakistani High Commissioner, HE Naela Chohan; Ambassador of the EU, HE Sam Fabrizi; and Deputy Secretary of the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade (DFAT), Ewen McDonald. The event was chaired by the Hon. Sharman Stone, Chair of the United Nations Parliamentary Group. In attendance were diplomats, parliamentarians, students and interested members of the public.

Fabrizi spoke on the importance of gender issues to the EU’s development agenda, stating that “gender equality and women’s empowerment is important for sustainable development” and was central to EU foreign policy. He expressed desire to raise spending on gender equality projects to

MIGUEL GALSIM between 0.15% and 0.20% of the EU’s gross domestic income. He said that “gender equality remains one of the greatest barriers to development in any country, rich or poor”.

mentioned that $50 million was earmarked for gender projects this financial year and $320 million over ten years would be dedicated to women’s development in the Pacific.

Chohan followed, echoing Fabrizi’s statements, saying: “Gender equality is not only an end in itself but an essential means for achieving sustainable growth.” Elucidating Pakistan’s official policy on gender equality, she reiterated her country’s commitment to international law on gender discrimination at national and provincial levels. She underlined attempts to empower women through government and civil society, especially given “the growing feminisation of poverty globally”.

Diplomats and UN professionals, including the British High Commissioner, joined in the conversation. The speakers discussed impediments to achieving global gender equality, and the obstacles of funding and data collection on abuses were emphasised. The discussion then moved to the difficulty of empowering women in conflict zones, and the question of practical steps forward.

Afterwards, Chohan told Woroni that she felt that Pakistan’s position on women’s empowerment was similar to other countries in the global South.

McDonald, giving DFAT’s perspective, affirmed the importance of the UN’s sustainable development goals, and highlighted the need for women in peacemaking and statebuilding projects. He felt that ending violence against women was an economic imperative and necessary to increase women’s participation in public life. He

“These thoughts resonate all over the developing countries. The challenges are the same; intensity may be different in different levels.

But our position is the position that most developing countries have, so it’s a strong one.”

She thought that “it was very important” to speak about gender equality in developing countries, “because those in the developed countries have a different prism to see the world through. They don’t see the sufferings that are on-theground realities. So when you talk in platforms like this, you are reaching out and creating awareness of what you’re dealing with, and I try to do that”.

Speaking about the event more broadly, she concluded: “It was a good exchange of views. But we need to continue with [the dialogue].”

When asked if students had been consulted about the change, ANUSA said that “to [their] knowledge, there was no specific consultation process held outside of the University committees on which ANUSA executives sit.”

PARSA, the ANU Postgraduate and Research Student Association, could not be reached for comment regarding this change.

SCIENCE CIRCUS AFRICA PROJECT CAMPUS NEWS The ANU National Centre of the Public Awareness of Science (NCPWA), along with Questacon, has this year launched the Science Circus Africa Project, reaching 41,000 children in Africa as part of an 11-week tour showcasing inspiring science.

Dr Graham Walker, Science Circus Africa Project Officer, said the project was “a brainchild of colleagues from the NCPWA and friends at Questacon – both organisations who have been active in Africa with science in the past”.

The project is an expansion of the Shell Questacon Science Circus (SQSC), run jointly by the ANU and Questacon – where students studying a Master of Science Communication Outreach bring

RIA PFLAUM interactive science shows to regional communities and schools across Australia.

communication across Mauritius, South Africa, Botswana, Zambia and Malawi.

ANU PhD student Matthew Dunn, a graduate of the SQSC, explained that: “The Science Circus gets students involved with some really spectacular science.”

In discussing the difficulties in transferring the Circus model from regional Australian communities to those they visited on the African tour, Dr Walker stated that there were two types – logistical and scientific.

“One of my favourite things about it is that it’s really focused on the rural and regional areas that often don’t have access to as much in terms of science experiences,” he said.

“Logistical issues included everything from coordinating ferry crossings to explaining to border guards why we had so much weird equipment with us…”

Dr. Walker and his team, in taking the Circus to Africa, transformed simple, everyday objects such as magnets and bicarbonate soda into fascinating experiments. These were designed to engage local communities in homegrown science

“The science challenges were more interesting than difficult – we made a lot of effort to make the science relevant to everyday life in Africa.”

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Emphasising long term benefits, Dr Walker and his team followed the Australian model of putting the focus on building up skills for presenters in the countries they visited. This included training a group of locals and donating equipment to them, “So they can keep up with the Circus after we’d left,” Dr Walker stated.

With a hope to keep the Circus growing, Dr Walker expressed that the big barrier was funding, however there were ‘’promising local partners” in Zimbabwe and Tanzania.

“Planting that seed that then grows into homegrown travelling science education, done by Africa by Africans, is the biggest benefit that we – and now they – could bring.”

W

WORONI No.10 Vol.67

//COMMENT

T H E R AU N C H Y S I D E

OF AFGHANISTAN VISHESH AGARWAL

COMMENT Slide your hand inside my sleeve, Stroke a red and ripening pomegranite of Kandahar.

The poem above is an example of what is known as a “Landay”, an anonymous folk couplet, sung by the most poor and illiterate Pashtun women in Afghanistan.

Ironically, the specific Landay above refers to the city of Kandahar, the birthplace of the Taliban. Under the surface of the repressive Taliban regime that banned the Landay from 1996 to 2001, and now in its aftermath, these pieces of rebel verse continue to simmer and reveal a sad yet beautiful side of the

ravaged Afghan society.

assignment covering the life story of Rahila Muska, a Pashtun woman who wrote Landays for a literary group called Mirhan Baheer.

Unlucky you who didn’t come last night, I took the bed’s hard wood post for a man.

You sold me to an old man, father.

May God destroy your home, I was your daughter

The Landay is not bereft of formal properties. Every Landay has twentytwo syllables: nine in the first line, thirteen in the second and finishes with the sound “ma” or “na”. They do not always rhyme and are sung along with the music of hand-made drums. Eliza Griswold, a journalist for The New York Times Magazine, and her photographer Seamus Murphy began collecting and translating these poems while on an

The Landays are not all fun and games.

They cover themes ranging from love and sex, to grief, poverty, child marriage, prostitution and Western culture. They critique in their subtle and sometimes not so subtle manner the ways of the world and cast light on the horrific

conditions that people manage not only to survive but also to create. Why is the Landay relevant? In times of increasing cultural xenophobia and communal identification in Australia and the world, a poem provides a small avenue to understand another side of a culture and society that is being manipulated to suit political needs. Most of all they are a channel to empathize with and humanize the lives of others.

I dream I am the president.

When I awake, I am the beggar of the world.

D O ME STIC VIOLENCE AGAI N ST

WO M E N IN AUSTRALIA COMMENT Your Mother. Your sister. Your daughter.

Statistics show that they have a one in three chance of falling victim to domestic violence. The data becomes darker and more pervasive when we find that seven in ten murdered women are targets of domestic violence. But that’s just another statistic, another number, on another issue to darken our doorsteps. These figures are thrown at us by the media: to shock, to spark the desired response.

As such, domestic violence appears to be the anomaly, an issue that has cut through the white noise and spurred us to action.

Yet for whatever reason, nothing seems to come from it. Am I not looking hard enough?

Am I a part of the problem? I couldn’t tell you.

Last week I sought to change that, attending an ANU Public Lecture where Tania Farha, who works for UN Women ‒ remember the Emma Watson speech? ‒ as a policy specialist in the Ending Violence Against Women Section, spoke.

She was marvellous, a great speaker and an accomplished woman. The theatre was packed, with 50 or so people in attendance.

Yet only four were men. She spoke at length about the massive, tragic gaps between the

LIAM FITZPATRICK UN declarations ‒ and boy were there a few ‒ and their implementation. Yet only four men were there to hear it. She applauded the establishment of UN Women for elevating the status of all females by making them a feature of any UN decision. Syria, Ebola, you name it: how women will be affected is now at the forefront. Yet only four men were there to hear it.

We have to grow up. I would never commit such a heinous act of violence, but until that day I’d done nothing more than allow mostly male politicians pay lip service to the issue.

The 2015 Budget allocated $16.7 million for an awareness campaign to end Violence Against Women. The Royal Commission into Union Corruption? $80 million.

Australians killed because of Islamic extremism in 2015? None. Australians killed because of Domestic Violence? One every week. This was acknowledged at the lecture; that a lot of us aren’t taking the steps to stand in solidarity with our wives, girlfriends and sisters to end Violence Against Women. Is it because it’s not second nature for men to understand relational power imbalances?

Have our chests been pumped and ears been closed by centuries of privilege?

Was there a men’s rights conference I wasn’t invited to? A football game I was supposed to fake enjoyment at? Where were the other men? I was only at the lecture because a girlfriend of mine wanted company. For whatever reason, I’d always viewed domestic violence as someone else’s issue. But since when was culpable deniability an excuse for not fighting the gravest expression of terrorism in Australian homes?

I have a confession. I’ll admit, initially, I felt defensive. I loathed Tania for portraying me as one of those “men” who beat their spouses.

I was pissed off that my gender was being portrayed as attackers, aggressive and bad fathers. I felt as if I was a part of the problem.

It’s no wonder that godforsaken 1/3 campaign and #notallmen hashtag went viral.

We must do more.

Because it’s women who are doing the leg work on the issue. Women who are advocating for reform. Women who are running the crisis shelters. And women who are overwhelmingly targeted by domestic abuse. It shouldn’t have to be that way. We clearly must do more. For every woman who reports the violence, another is frightened to

But that’s men sticking up for men. It’s petty.

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call out, trapped in her home, scared that the limited services will make it worse.

It’s not good enoguh.

We’ve heard the stats, learnt to condemn these men and know the lines to dish out.

We know never to hit a woman and most of us never will. But it can’t stop there. If we become informed and stand next to Australia’s women in their fight against this senseless brutality then politicians will get the message, more substantive policy will follow, and more women will come forward with the knowledge that their cries will be heard.

This is not a women’s issue, this is an Australian epidemic. We can stop another woman from becoming a statistic. We can end Domestic Violence. We owe it to our sisters, our mothers, our girlfriends and women everywhere to do more.

I know I will.

INTERNATIONAL

BLEACH NISHANTH PATHY

Racial privilege is a strange beast.

Other privileges are fairly obvious: you’re tall, you’re male, you went to a “good school”. They tie into something tangible that advantages you over others. Race, however, is different. Race is more than the colour of your skin – it’s your accent, your languages, your culture and the relationship between yourself and your nation. Hence, being someone who is a monolingual Anglophone with an Australian accent, when I’m discussing my own privileges, a weird thing happens. I give the standard list – I’m tall, I’m male, I’m from a good school – but bizarrely, another privilege slips in at the end: I’m white.

In case you couldn’t tell from the name, I’m not white. I’m half South Australian, half South Indian. I was raised in a regional town in Victoria, where everybody else was white. For much of my childhood, I lived exclusively with my white mother. I only speak English, as does everyone in my immediate family, including my Tamil father. The only “Indian” characteristic that I have is a marginally higher spice tolerance than your average white Australian, and that nobody can pronounce my name the first time.

Hence, you can see why I sometimes get confused. Other than the literal colour of my skin, I have nothing that makes me a person of colour. I am culturally Anglo-Saxon.

So how is it that an entire half of my heritage was whitewashed away? When my father’s family came to Australia from Tamil Nadu, it was back in the days of the white Australia policy.

The children were all forbidden from speaking Tamil (up to that point, they were bilingual) – henceforth, they would only speak English. They felt the need to grasp at the racial privileges of being white, and that couldn’t happen with a Tamil culture or a Tamil language. I hear bizarre stories of my uncles and father being given comic books and told to read them in order to “experience Australian culture”.

The family took the “assimilate or die” approach to cultural integration. It ended up being both – they assimilated, but their culture died.

And so, in our generation of the Pathy

There are lots of reasons to adopt positive family, there’s scarce little Indian left in cRacial privilege is a strange beast. Other us. The languages learnt by myself and privileges are fairly obvious: you’re my cousins are Chinese and French, and tall, you’re male, you went to a “good when we returned to India, it felt far school”. They tie into something tangible more foreign than any other country to that advantages you over others. Race, which I’veisbeen beforeRace or since.

When however, different. is more than my grandparents pass away, there the colour of your skin – it’s your accent, will nobody leftyour who culture speaks Tamil. yourbelanguages, and the When my father’s generation relationship between yourselfpass and your away, will being be onlysomeone three or four nation.there Hence, who is in a huge, Indian family who have anyan a monolingual Anglophone with real connection to India.

In all but skin Australian accent, when I’m discussing colour, will be aa white with my ownwe privileges, weird family thing happens. bizarrely I give the non-white standard listnames.

– I’m tall, I’m male,

I’m from a good school – but bizarrely, Fortunately, Australia changed. another privilege slips has in at the end:Not I’m all families that emigrated when we did white. disregarded as much tell of their In case you couldn’t fromheritage, the name, and most that come to Australia now I’m not white.

I’m half South Australian, would refuse to do so. raised Some small part half South Indian.

I was in a regional of the in multiculturalist message that else town Victoria, where everybody diff cultures are valuable has sunk I waserent white.

For much of my childhood, through to newlywith immigrated families. lived exclusively my white mother.

But now that’sEnglish, changing, for the I only speak as and doesnot everyone better. in my immediate family, including my Tamil father. The only “Indian” When groupsthat like IReclaim characteristic have isAustralia a marginally higher tolerance your– average say thatspice Muslims havethan a choice be white Australian, and that nobody Muslim, or be Australian – they send can myassimilate name the or first time. apronounce message of die.

When Hence, you Andrew can see why sometimes Alan Jones, Bolt Iand their get confused.

Other than thezombifi literal ed colour of hordes of intellectually my skin, Idenounce have nothing thatGoodes’ makes me a followers Adam person I am Anglowar cryof as colour. culturally offculturally ensive, they Saxon. send a message of assimilate or die.

So how it real thatconsequences. an entire halfThe of my And that ishas heritage was whitewashed away?

When whitewashed part of your culture never my father’s family came to Australia leaves – it just hangs around as an from Tamil Nadu, it disjunct was backbetween in the days absent scar, the your of the white Australia policy.

The children skin colour, your Indian name and the were all forbiddenAnglo-Saxon from speaking Tamil comprehensively nature of (up to that point, they were bilingual) your culture.

– henceforth, they would Australia had almost rid itselfonly of itsspeak English.

They felt the need to grasp at the “assimilate or die” mentality. Cultural racial privileges of being white, and that differences from Eastern and Southern couldn’tare happen with aand Tamil culture or Europe celebrated, Indian a Tamilislanguage.

I hear bizarre stories culture now so accepted that going of my uncles and father being volunteering to “experience the realgiven comic threatens books andto told to read them in India” overtake South-East order to “experience Australian culture”.

Asia as the most popular volunteering The family took the “assimilate or die” voyage. But that doesn’t diminish the approach to cultural integration. It ended real threat of bemoaning Indigenous up being both – they assimilated, but their Australian, Arab, Pakistani and other culture died. cultures. Extremists don’t respond to And so, in our generation of the Pathy whitewashing - by definition, terrorists family, there’s scarce little Indian left in would rather die than assimilate. us. The languages learnt by myself and The only people hurt by a culture of my cousins are Chinese and French, and whitewashing are those who came to when we returned to India, it felt far Australia seeking an accepting, tolerant more foreign than any other country to society, and been instead found the When which I’ve before orthat since. only way to be accepted was to bleach my grandparents pass away, there will be nobody left who speaks Tamil. When my father’s generation pass away, there will be only three or four in a huge, Indian family who have any real connection to India. In all but skin colour, we will be a white family with bizarrely non-white

themselves “clean” of their heritage, and sever their ties to their past.

Whitewashing only happens when nonwhite Australians feel like their cultures set them apart, and when they feel like their traditions are so fundamentally irreconcilable from their new life that they have to choose between their country and their very heritage. But we can make sure that they never feel like this. It’s our responsibility to make sure that non-white Australians know that their traditions and cultures are perfectly at home here – it’s things like the groundswell of support behind Goodes that achieve this. And if we can quell these “assimilate or die” voices in our community before they grow again to become the majority, then we won’t have to watch another generation see their pasts be whitewashed away.

OBSERVATIONS FROM ATHENS To a casual eye, Athens does not look like a city in strife. If you take the metro to the centre of the city and hop off at Syntagma Square you’ll find it full of beaming street vendors, children hollering to one another in the fountains, and the drone of skateboards taking advantage of civic architecture. Head down flashy Ermou Street towards the tourist Mecca that is the Acropolis and its clear that business is still booming. There are no sloganed banners, no midnight vigils, no angry anarchists. There’s nothing to indicate Greece’s economy is tottering beyond the pale and that its people are suffering. But of course, the tourism industry doubtless conceals a great deal of the pain.

Outside the tourist zone, once you penetrate the rambling whitewashed Lego blocks that comprise the vast majority of the city, there is a slightly different story. Coffee shops and restaurants are perhaps a little quiet of an evening. Graffiti is ubiquitous; shop owners seem unwilling or unable to remove it, but these angry, slapstick colors don’t really feel out of place in the urban wilderness. Athens isn’t a pretty place, but it’s not unwelcoming.

There are, however a few pertinent signs of a bankrupt government.

There’s a technical university right next to the National Archaeology Museum that’s been shut down: it has a heavy chain on the gate, long grass growing through the concrete and a head that’s fallen off a statue lying in the courtyard.

The National gardens around Syntagma are unkempt, and there are plenty of shuttered shop fronts.

JOHN GOLDIE

The first real sign of human hardship, however, is the idleness of the Athenians floating around the public spaces. Anyone who has travelled to a developing country will notice that people seem to sit around a lot, all day.

They smoke, chat with their friends, stare at tourists, and appear to go about their lives simply by inhabiting a human shaped space in the cosmos.

They’re not lazy ‒ they’re unemployed, and have no recourse for occupation.

There’s a lot of sitting around going on in Athens. As you’d expect, the sitting intensifies the further you are from the Acropolis.

Many of the Athenians who are on their feet are mendicants. In my experience, they fall into two categories. First,

there are those who initially act with a show of confidence, deploying some practiced hook to draw passers by in. Monastriki is filled with African guys giving fist bumps to every passer by yelling “Hakuna Matata’ before trying to weave a tale and a colorful bracelet around your wrist – the routine is identical in Paris and Rome.

Occasionally however, you’ll come across something very different, and it is much more upsetting: someone who is visibly ashamed of what they are doing. It seems to be the mark of someone who has become destitute comparatively recently and has had to become a beggar out of absolute necessity. You come to expect this on the Athens metro, at just about any time of day.

The metro is also the place to find pious gentlemen handing out religious pamphlets. Athens has a surfeit of tiny Orthodox churches. Many of these structures sit a metre or more below the surrounding street level, which has risen steadily since most of them were constructed in Byzantine antiquity.

Inside every one of these musty time capsules you will find Athenians praying, lighting candles, kissing frescoed images of Christ and the Virgin, or just fiddling with Komoboloi (prayer beads) on the steps outside.

It’s not just the older generation: there are young families with children, and even teenagers, skateboard in hand, frequenting the churches. The Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit are doubtless of even greater importance to the faithful in difficult times.

I spoke to more than a few Athenians about their national finances and the thrust of the conversation was always the same: we are proud of our country and our people will endure, but “the government” sucks, a lot. Despite the fact that Greece has been in the dumps for at least five years now, Athenians seem to feel that this is a temporary state of affairs. There is no sense of incipient revolution, no fear that civil society will collapse. Greece was once the friction point dividing Iron Curtain and the Marshall Plan. Perhaps it is a lesson of the post-Cold War world that economic crisis no longer invites the serious threat of revolution, but rather moderation and reform. Athens remains a brilliant city to visit, rich in history, great food, and a launching post for adventures into the mountains or the Cyclades. Euro-crisis be damned, it’s plodding along fine.

I N T E R N AT I O N A L

LOVE PAROKSH PRASAD

Love has never been “easy”. I think that we can all agree that relationships require a great deal of effort and attention. The countless messages, date nights followed by Netflix and chills, shared secrets and special moments all count toward a healthy, fulfilling relationship. Equally, there are so many obstacles to rise above – some more easy to overcome than others.

One integral aspect to a conventional “good” relationship is proximity. Being physically close to your lover enables you to make those spontaneous car trips, stare into one another’s eyes passionately, and so on, including the ability to make carnal love. Whether you live in the same city, the same college, or even when you live together, it is commonplace for your geographical closeness to be taken for granted. Consider, for a moment, those lovers from whom propinquity is a daily prayer and perhaps a distant reality?

I am going to tell you the story of two of my friends, Raymond and Malinda.

Their story is not quite comedic and neither tragic. It’s just the story of two people who realised that they shared something more than friendship but found themselves separated by seas.

Malinda lives in Sydney. She was born there and has lived her entire life there.

Raymond used to live in India, where he was born and raised.

Now, as much as relationships and Facebook should be kept as separate as religion and the state, Malinda was introduced to Raymond over the social media platform by a mutual friend. It isn’t necessarily abnormal for people to add friends of friends from overseas and it definitely wasn’t for these two. They got talking and their companionship soon fostered passion. Six months after having added one another, Raymond started labelling them a couple.

They may have been tens of thousands of kilometres away but they acknowledged that they had developed feelings for one another. Malinda had previously been in a long-distance relationship and had sworn to never repeat it but when Raymond came around, she was willing to take a risk, stating that she had nothing to lose but everything to gain.

you are going; more so when you are so far apart. Malinda admits that there were many “It’s too hard!” and “Is this worth it?”moments but any hesitation was soon dissipated by Raymond’s constant trust in their future. Without a moment’s thought, Malinda confirms that Raymond was the rock of their relationship.

When asked why she kept so much faith in a long distance relationship, Malinda confessed that for her, long distance was an easier option. She was only 18 when she and Raymond started courting, and her parents were very strict. If someone local had asked her out, to her it seemed that there would be more obstacles to overcome.

In 2013, Raymond visited Australia for the first time on a month long holiday.

Malinda’s reception of him at the airport was the first time the couple had met face to face. One would ordinarily think that such a meeting would be somewhat awkward but for these two, everything fell into place. Their time and emotional effort had paid off.

A lengthy 3 years passed as the two cyber-courted one another. Their long conversations were supported by Viber and WhatsApp, while face-to-face interaction was limited to Skype. (Thank God for technology!) During this time, there were many hardships that arose between the pair:

Malinda acknowledges that their future would have been bust if not for Raymond. There was no way Malinda was moving to India. However, she made sure that when he moved to Sydney, he was doing so for himself, just as much as he was for her. Their love was mutual and therefore their decisions too.

This juncture is where problems many problems could arise but the couple laid strong foundations here for a prosperous future.

Approval: To contribute to an already difficult relationship, Malinda’s status was unbeknown to her parents. Hence, Skype chats were few and far between and held discreetly.

Romance: Not once were Malinda and Raymond able to hug during their initial three year courtship. Not once could they lock lips and share in their common passion. But this was never a problem for them. They held a strong belief that circumstances would be sorted out.

Unable to tuck one another to sleep each night, they would call each other with a simple good night message – their practice for maintaining romantic relevance in each of their lives.

Perseverance: It’s always important to take stock of a relationship and consider where you are at and where

Upon his return to India, Raymond applied to return to Australia for study.

He came back last year and now studies in Sydney, spending all of his free hours with Malinda – making up for lost time.

Moral of the story? Don’t let distance restrict your ability to find and be with the person of your dreams. If you’re an optimist like Malinda, Raymond and myself, then you’ll trust in the idea that nothing can come between two lovers. As long as the essence of your relationship is founded upon strong mutual feelings and faith, circumstances are open to manipulation. So go on and put yourself out there. Don’t be afraid. Take that step, drive, or flight. It’ll be worth it.

A HOME AWAY FROM HOME JAMIE CHONG & BENJAMIN-HENRY BEK ZHAN HAO When a person is an international student it means that they are not only separated from their family, but also that they are placed in a whole new environment. The challenges faced by the international community never end – from language barriers, to feeling left out, and sometimes even having to endure forms of racism. The ANU has a diverse international community, and yet, we are a group often neglected when it comes to having our needs met.

Homesickness is just the beginning of every single international student’s struggle to create a home away from home. The limited array of familiar food and groceries available causes one to miss the taste of home. The lack of cultural and religious events results in missing the atmosphere of the festivities at home. The different language being spoken here would also cause the missing of vernacular comforts of home. All these little things add up and can become overwhelming to the international student, especially when others do not place themselves in our shoes.

I am from Singapore, where multiculturalism is a part of our daily lives since Singapore comprises four main ethnicities: the Chinese, the Malays, the Indians, and the Eurasians.

Due to this racial diversity, we celebrate cultural and religious festivals all year round, and Singaporeans of different races converge as one to join in these festivities. Eid al-Fitr was celebrated on 17th July in Australia, and it was a religious festival that marked the end of the Ramadan fasting month for Muslims. A Muslim friend of mine mentioned, in June, that she missed home and that she would not be going back during the Winter break to celebrate Eid with her family.

Although our religious backgrounds differ, a group of friends and I decided to bring the experience of Eid onto campus (notwithstanding the religious diversity). We also felt that this would allow others to learn more about the religious festival that is so dear to so

many people. After a pile of paperwork and struggles to fit the event onto the ANUSA Bush Week calendar, the Eid alFitr Festival 2015 was successfully held on 26th July 2015.

Sponsored by SEEF, ANUSA, and PARSA, the Eid 2k15 Team managed to draw in a crowd that did not only consist of ANU students, but also Muslims from all around Canberra.

This was despite the overcast weather prevalent throughout the day. The event was far more than a success, attracting nearly three hundred attendees as we gathered together for a day of food, fun, and laughter. Collaborating with MSO, SSA, ISA, PSA as well as OZ1001 where food logistics were concerned, we also provided traditional sweets, free henna drawings, as well as Arabic calligraphy.

The event was well received, and it was definitely a step forward for the international community at the ANU. The success definitely encouraged the Eid 2k15 Team to organise more cultural and/or religious events in the near future, in order to bring the international community a step closer to home, no matter how far each individual may be.

Living on campus, I am actively engaged in the OZ1001 Student Integration Program which is a UniLodge program sponsored by CSP, SEEF and PARSA. Given that more than 60% of residents at UniLodge are international students, this means the residence accommodates most of the ANU’s international student population. With its main goal of trying to ease students’ transition into Canberra, organising events that will bring together the locals and internationals will help these international students get to know Canberra and the Australian way of life.

Additionally, in order to make them feel like they are a part of the community, monthly birthday celebrations also ensure that they know that there are people who care for them despite them being away from home.

Being an international student at the ANU definitely has its perks. Getting to introduce your culture to other international students as well as locals allows for the ANU community to gain a wider knowledge on the different cultures that are present, but not yet known to them. The ANU is also supportive of these events as they promote cultural diversity, and at the same time give students the opportunity to organise events and become leaders within their own communities. Bringing different cultures to the ANU not only narrows the gap of being away from home, it also helps to open the minds of the community towards a more multicultural and accepting campus.

A TRIP TO THE HEART OF AFRICA CAITLIN MAGEE & MATTHEW TEH

The most exciting part of being a student at the ANU is being able to leave ANU. Later this year, myself and 9 other students will embark on a long journey to the heart of Africa, to rural Malawi as part of a program called Global Undergraduate Leadership Program (GULP). GULP is a one of a kind project focusing on the cultural and developmental aspect of leadership, where ten ANU students will join ten other University of Minnesota (UoM) students in Malawi to work with Determined to Develop, a charity focused on education, women’s empowerment and the health of the people of Malawi.

What initially attracted me to GULP was its broad community involvement; it was a chance to foster and nurture relationships in our local community through fundraising but also to help internationally. Since GULP is a newly introduced program, only in its second year, there is still a lot of flexibility with this growing project. I find this absolutely fantastic because it is allowing students like myself to identify a project, define what we want to achieve and work out how we are going to achieve it. It also encourages us to embrace our strengths and it allows all GULP cohorts the ability to adapt to a method of leadership and philanthropy that fits them best.

I first found out about GULP at the end of last year through looking through the ANU website. Next minute, I found out I was selected and was anxiously waiting to meet my 9 counterparts at our weekend retreat at Kioloa. At Kioloa, we met ex-GULPers Chris Ronan, Simon Mulvaney and the UoM GULP coordinator Aaron Asmundson.

From Chris and Simon we learned that we would be getting gastro at least twice, but also we would be in a ride of a lifetime being able to make lifelong friendships with our American counterparts as well as through our ANU peers. Aaron taught us about the leadership strengths and the cultural acceptance spectrum. I found that these tests really helped with my understanding of who I am, what sort of traits I have that can really improve a leadership experience and where I need to let go and let someone else take charge. I felt that being able to understand these skills would help me with all aspects of life, not just GULP. But where is the program headed? And what exactly is the purpose behind the ANU students going into rural

Malawi? The GULP program is in its nascent beginnings. The aim behind any meaningful aid provided by us is the commitment to a long-term project in tandem with Determined to Develop, which addresses the concerns of the community in a way that is sustainable and meaningful for them. GULP is guided by learning, collaboration and opportunity. It’s something that not only delivers for Malawians, but for us back at the ANU. The central project that the GULP program will focus on this year is a three-day conference to be held in Maji Zuwa that targets the youth of Malawi.

Around 120 students are expected to attend. The GULP students from the ANU and the UoM will be collaborating to organise this conference and deliver it in a way that is relatable to the Malawian students. We seek to inspire and engage these students such that their capability to improve their own community is not restricted by mental barriers. The importance of things like education and gender equality will be brought to light; Malawian youth will be able to address these issues in their own leadership capacity in the future.

With this also comes the development of our own leadership skills. GULP thrusts us into an alien environment where our leadership skills and our capacity to engage, lead and inspire will be tested not only in the conference, but with our work with our counterparts from the UoM. Central to this is our ability to empathise with people from a completely separate culture and our cultural understanding and communication will no doubt be tested.

We hope for the GULP program to be something which is at the forefront of the ANU’s engagement with the global community in a way not explored through any of the ANU’s channels: in a bilateral manner which makes a “dent which matters” to the social issues of rural Africa, teaching ANU students critical leadership skills essential to the globalised world we live in. It will involve a long-term relationship working with the people of Maji Zuwa, corresponding with them over an extended period of time to ensure that meaningful development is being made.

Though participants in the program come and go each year, the work contributed by likeminded students will maintain this relationship such that the people of Maji Zuwa will be able to alleviate their community out of poverty in years to come.

Whenever I ask my Australian friends about their favourite Vietnamese dish, the most common choice is Pho. However we have a wide arrange of traditional foods in Vietnam. Thus I would like to take you to a culinary journey to discover genuine Northern Viet dishes!

VIETNAMESE CULINARY DELIGHTS: NOT JUST “PHO” JENNY BUI 1

FERMENTED SHRIMP PASTE WITH FRIED TOFU AND RICE VERMICELLI (Bún đậu mắm tôm)

This picture might make you scream, “What is that brown sauce with chili?

Fermented shrimp paste?!”, but I would tell you to calm down. The answer is yes, but hold on ‒ if you smell it alone, you will be freaked out because most of foreigners cannot stand the unique scent of this paste. You say you have accepted the smell of fish sauce? That is a good start, however shrimp paste has an even more overwhelming smell.

Many admit that it smells really foul.

But once you get used to with it and become “local Viet”, you will love this seemingly pleasant roasted shrimp aroma more than anything.

Besides the paste, this dish is also composed of deep fried tofu. The tofu is cooked on medium high heat to the extent that the skin turns golden brown, while the insides are kept moist without being greasy. When you dip the tofu into the shrimp paste, you can taste the crispy skin mixed with the savory sauce.

Next to the tofu are boiled pork slice, cucumber, herbal Viet balm and vermicelli. You can eat them separately or combine any of them together to create a tasty mixture.

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HANOI COMBO NOODLE SOUP / HANOI CHICKEN VERMICELLI (Bún thang Hà Nội)

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CHARGRILLED PORK PATTIES WITH HERBS (Bún chả Hà Nội)

“Bun cha” is just another type of noodle soup with grilled pork belly or groundgrilled pork. The soup contains rice noodles, fresh herbs and broth served with carrot and pickled radish. The broth itself is made from fish sauce (A staple of Vietnamese cuisine), vinegar and sugar, which are combined to create a sweet and sour taste.

This is the most unique and special dish as you can only find it in Ha Noi, capital of Vietnam. In Lauren Shockey’s Four Kitchens (2011), Shockey wrote: “After pho, bun cha is one of Hanoi’s most famous dishes and is a delicious summertime lunch or light dinner. In Hanoi, you’ll know you’re at a bun cha stand by the smoke wafting from the charcoal grills.”

Unlike usual “pho”, Bun thang is a finical traditional dish of Hanoi. There are only three main ingredients in the soup, but the rest takes lots of time and effort to prepare. The soup broth is made from boiled chicken and ginger, dried shrimps and mushroom, topped with shrimp floss. You would need to fry the eggs carefully into very thin slides and wait until they cool down before cutting them into long strips.

As for the meat, you would also need to cut the boil chicken into thin strips, add some green onion and laksa leaves. Finally just add the rest of the ingredients to a large bowl and serve.

THE FUTURE OF DEMOCRACY

IN

For many Malaysians, the domestic political scene has often been associated with cronyism, nepotism and moneybased politics. In the past several months however, events have been so sordid that even the most cynical political commentators have expressed their shock.

In February this year, Malaysia’s highest court decided to uphold the sodomy conviction of opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim, causing uproar in Malaysian society against charges that are widely held to be politically motivated. Anwar, who served as Deputy Prime Minister to then Prime Minister Mahatir Mohamed in the mid-1990s, fell out of favour and has since been hounded by seemingly interminable legal problems.

Anwar quickly emerged to become the leader of Malaysia’s opposition coalition, Pakatan Rakyat (PR), a grouping that brought together his own People’s Justice Party (PKR), Democratic Action Party (DAP) and Pan-Malaysian Islamic Party (PAS). However, gerrymandering which led to a distortion of district sizes benefiting Barisan Nasional (BN), allowed the incumbent Prime Minister Najib Razak to retain his grip on power.

It seemed however, that it was only Anwar’s leadership that was able to keep a lid on the fundamental differences within the PR coalition. On 16 June 2015, DAP Secretary-General Lim in a statement to the media announced that Pakatan Rakyat ceased to exist. Lim said it was PAS President Abdul Hadi Awang’s unilateral decision to push for hudud, or Islamic law, and PAS’ decision to sever ties with the DAP, that led to PR’s collapse.

If this wasn’t enough bad news, on 2nd July, The Wall Street Journal (WSJ) reported that Malaysian investors had traced nearly $700 million of deposits into what investigators believed were Mr Najib’s personal bank accounts

MAL AYSIA ANDALEEB AKHAND

after the movement of cash among agencies, banks and companies linked to 1Malaysia Development Berhard (1MDB).

1MDB is a strategic state fund set up when Prime Minister Najib Razak came into office to turn Kuala Lumpur into a financial hub. However, 1MDB, whose advisory board is chaired by Mr Najib, has been saddled with debts of AUD17.1 billion and has drawn flak for its lack of transparency. Even before the WSJ’s shocking revelations, 1MDB was the subject of separate investigations by the central bank, auditor general, police and the parliament’s Public Accounts Committee.

Prime Minister Najib naturally denied taking any money, and the Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC) said that the money was from a “donor contribution”. The MACC didn’t say however, who the donor was, nor the purpose of the contribution.

For most Malaysians, and many observers overseas, this smacks of a cover-up on a staggering scale.

Muhyiddin Yassin, who was Deputy Prime Minister when the 1MDB saga engulfed Prime Minister Najib, had been the most prominent government voice in criticising the government’s handling of the 1MDB’s massive debt and repeatedly called for Mr Najib to explain the alleged funds transfer.

On July 28, Muhyiddin Yassin was sacked, along with the attorney general Abdul Gani Patail. Before his removal from office attorney general Abdul Gani Patail was one of four officials leading the 1MDB investigation, alongside individuals from the anti-graft commission, Malaysian police and the Malaysian central bank.

In justifying the cabinet purge, Mr Najib said: “I can accept differences in opinion and criticisms as part of the decision-

making process, but these differences in opinion should not be made in an open forum that can affect public perception of the government and the country.” For Mr Najib’s critics, the sackings were little more than an attempt to insulate himself from prosecution.

Media outlets also found themselves muzzled over their coverage of the 1MDB scandal. The Sarawak Report, a whistleblowing website, had reported extensively on a series of bribery and financial mismanagement allegations linked to Najib and 1MDB. Based in London, the website found itself blocked in Malaysia.

With Najib seemingly having escaped the consequences of his actions, Malaysia’s leading opposition figure in prison and the Pakatan Rakyat coalition dead in the water, most would despair over the state of affairs of Malaysian politics today. Yet when the prospects are bleakest, Malaysians can still display an extraordinary determination to believe their country can do better. The Coalition for Clean and Fair Elections (known in Malay as Bersih 2.0) has joined forces with 90 other NGOs to stage a “Bersih 4.0 Rally” for two days from August 29 to 30. To take place in Malaysia and across the world wherever the Malaysian diaspora has a presence, the rally will call for the resignation of Prime Minister Najib.

It will probably not achieve its stated objective.

Najib’s party UMNO (United Malays National Organisation) ultimately controls the very institutions that would be expected to hold him to account, including the AttorneyGeneral’s Chambers, the police, the MACC and the courts. Yet speaking out against atrocities has its own intrinsic value. As Albert Einstein once said, “If I were to remain silent, I’d be guilty of complicity.”

COLLIDING FOR ANSWERS: THE F U T U R E O F PA R T I C L E P H Y S I C S SCIENCE The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) symbolises an international collaboration to understand our universe at the most fundamental of levels. It’s been five years since the first beam injection and three years since the first observations of the Higgs Boson were made. With the standard model of particle physics now complete, do we still have a need for the LHC and instruments of its kind?

To answer this question we must consider two streams of thought: expanding our knowledge within the current understanding of particle physics and pursuing particle physics beyond the standard model.

Just last month, researchers at CERN made an outstanding announcement:

MAXWELL JONES the detection of a pentaquark to a ninesigma level – which is a stupendously certain result. For those unfamiliar with particle physics, a quark is a class of elementary particle that comes in six “flavours”. These are up, down, charm, strange, top and bottom.

the protons and neutrons from which we’re all made, is constituted.”

A pentaquark is, as the name suggests, a collection of five quarks (in particular two up, one down, a charm and an anticharm). The precise binding of these quarks is still unknown, though a few theories do exist, that CERN researchers plan to investigate. Guy Wilkinson, an LHC spokesperson, said following with regard to the discovery: “The pentaquark is not just any new particle.

Studying its properties may allow us to understand better how ordinary matter,

As I mentioned earlier, the standard model is not the be all and end all – not by any means. We still do not have a theory that unifies gravity with the other forces. We don’t understand dark matter or dark energy, despite them occupying 96% of the mass-energy content of the known universe, and we are yet to comprehensively investigate ideas such as supersymmetry and string theory.

This is only to name a few.

Discoveries of this kind prove that there is still so much we are yet to uncover, within the framework of particle physics we already comprehend.

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Illustration by Joanne Leong

With the recent upgrade of collision energies from 8 TeV to 13 TeV, researchers at CERN hope to use the LHC to answer these questions. However, these astronomically high energies still might not be high enough to provide the answers we need. In response to this, CERN is currently undertaking an exploratory study into the construction of a next generation circular collider that could reach collision energies of 100 TeV! Understanding the universe at the most fundamental of levels is one of the most important scientific endeavours. Until we are certain of everything – if that time ever arrives – then we will always have a need for instruments such as the LHC.

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F RO M C ANBERRA T O T OKYO: TRADING BOOKS FOR THE LAB SCIENCE In early June I embarked on a twomonth long research internship program in The University of Tokyo, Japan. The U.S. biotechnology company Amgen sponsored me and nineteen other keen-bean science students from around the world to attend.

We were each assigned to a lab, with a research focus on biomedicine.

Working under Professor Horacio Cabral in the Department of Bioengineering, I investigated targeted drug delivery systems. In particular, I examined how varying the size of nanomedicines could allow for delivery of anticancer drugs to tumours in pregnant mice,

BETTY XIONG whilst avoiding accumulation in the placenta and foetus. It sounds like a mouthful (scientists tend to have a knack for using technical jargon to alienate readers), but essentially the aim of the study was to determine whether we could develop safe chemotherapeutic treatments for pregnant patients.

would be following a lab manual in my courses, I became the scientific connoisseur in the lab. Where I would be learning by attending lectures and tutorials, in Japan, I was learning through journal articles and communication with fellow colleagues. It was phenomenal to be able to use the knowledge I gained from the ANU in an applied research setting. I felt like a true researcher working in the lab, instead of an ordinary undergraduate student.

Having the opportunity to work in a lab for the first time, and in a foreign country, was an experience. It was vastly different from attending lectures and laboratory practicals, where everything is regimented and set out for you. I suppose you could say that I discovered what “real” research was like. Where I

It was a steep learning curve, not only in terms of the science, but also in coming to grips with the cultural differences. Fun fact: before entering a laboratory, you must take off your

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shoes and put on special lab slippers, to avoid outside contamination.

Despite this, the opportunity to attend seminars, conduct independent research and present it in oral and poster presentations was remarkable.

I’m writing this as I sit in my room, procrastinating over the three weeks of lectures and university content that I am behind in, but I have no regrets. I’ve come out of the internship with expanded laboratory skills, a new cultural perspective and memories and friendships that I’ll remember forever.

Week 5, Semester 2, 2015.

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INK REMIX ARTS & REVIEWS A stunning exhibition of contemporary art from mainland China, Taiwan and Hong Kong is currently on display at Canberra Museum and Gallery (CMAG). Curated

by Sophie McIntyre, Ink Remix presents 35 works from fourteen contemporary Asian artists whose creative pursuits achieve a balance between the continuation of ancient eastern artistic traditions and as commentary on the modern world.

Ink Remix incorporates sculptural mediums, multimedia and photographic experimentation, however the focus on specific aspects of ink art reflects the importance of ink painting in East Asian culture.

It is the combination of an inked brush

LOUISE KEAST and paper that He Xiangyu, the youngest artist represented in this exhibition, subverts. When you first look at Xiangyu’s two Antique Circular Fans (2009 – 2010) on display, they appear as traditional shanshui (landscape) paintings on silk in the style of the Song dynasty (960 – 1279 China). However these delicate fans are the product of an ambitious project instigated by Xiangyu in 2008, where he worked with factory labourers for a year to boil down 127 tonnes of Coca-Cola. Once the soft drink was reduced down, Xiangyu painted with the resulting sludgy ink. This substance continued to be boiled down until crystalline coal-like lumps were created. These Cola-Dregs were installed in White Space, Beijing, in 2010 and were

an analysis of foreign industrialization in China. By utilising the popular branded soft drink in unrecognisable forms, Xiangyu cleverly remarks on the meaninglessness of consumer culture.

Other works I really enjoyed at Ink Remix were Peng Hung-Chih’s excerpts from The Taoist Protective Talisman (from Canine Monk Series), 2006 (a five channel video depicting a dog licking written phrases from classic Chinese religious and philosophical texts onto a wall) as well as Charwei Tsai’s Tofu Mantra, 2005 (a time-lapse video which displays the artist meditatively and repetitively writing calligraphic characters onto a block of tofu which over an extended period of time

decays into a disgusting shrunken lump swarmed by insects).

Ink Remix is on display at CMAG until Sunday 18 October, tours the Bendigo Art Gallery, University of NSW Galleries Sydney and the Museum of Brisbane.

STEPPING UP:

THE AUSTRALIAN CERAMICS TRIENNALE ARTS & REVIEWS It feels like a wonderful blur now, everything sliding smoothly from one event into the next. Stepping Up, the Australian Ceramics Triennale was a varied, exciting and energising conference.

From the 31 accompanying exhibitions around Canberra to live performances, there was something for everyone.

Perhaps this was one of the main highlights: showing the varied nature of clay and creative practice, that in itself it is diverse and far-reaching.

The conference brought together 400 individuals from around Australia and the world who share a common interest in the ceramic art form. As a current ceramic student at the ANU School of Art, I found the exposure to new ideas from international artists invaluable. Kelly Austin, a Masters student in Ceramics, had this to say about her experience: “If I had to choose one key experience... it would

ABBEY JAMIESON have to have been the lecture by Jacques Kaufmann titled Material Consciousness.”

Kaufmann was asking makers to step up and give more meaning to our actions. He gave the example of tableware and the idea of the exchange, suggesting that emotion should be included in all considered objects. When we make a plate, it will become a meaningful, interesting object with quality if embedded with poetic value. He said it is the “quality of the maker’s attention that will be perceived by the user”. The idea of quality was a key topic for the conference and related not only to making better work, but making work that would last longer, aesthetically and philosophically – work that has emotional durability.

technology, other fields of thought and other disciplines within their university.

By incorporating ceramics within modern technology such as 3D printing, artists and designers are evolving part of a historical practice. She encouraged us to embrace technology as another tool in our toolbox.

Kevin Murray gave a presentation titled “Australian ceramics in the Asian century – turning competition into partnership”.

Along with other artists he mentioned the work of Juree Kim, a ceramic artist who exhibits raw small-scale clay buildings in trays of shallow water. Throughout the exhibition, as the water soaks into the clay, the building slowly loses its form. Her work illustrates the demolition process of the old overtaking the new. It could also be read as a comment on climate change and our impact upon the Earth.

Kate Dunn, an artist, designer and lecturer at UNSW Art and Design gave a lecture about her interdisciplinary ideas. She encourages her students to work with

Reflecting on the conference, the one thing that has stayed with me is the notion that

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clay preserves memory. When clay is fired it undergoes an irreversible physical change. It is important for us as makers and as consumers to be mindful of our footprint on the Earth. If we invest in a plate infused with meaning we might fix it if it breaks rather than instantly replacing it and throwing the waste to landfill. We all have a responsibility to our Earth, and each other, to think deeper. We need to be active participants and audience members in the art world, always thinking and searching for more.

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LIAM SWALES

A Real life campus Seems dead when lights are down To those who do not bother To look around with A nightly stroll Beneath the cold And wander where my feet might go The buildings are quite harmless The big and sleepy slabs Like prey they must Be worth the fight But I am small and They are large And plus it’s dark at night.

One always knows the time has ticked Too much to bear your stay, Where I came here The air was still The leaves and smiles were full Tinted yellow, union court And summer weather sport.

Uni Ave where shade was sought Fessors thought And something else, You wouldn’t dare To say goodbye to Madame George.

You were too busy Crying while summertime turned Slowly into autumn.

The rosy withered From the face as parching scratched the lines of stress.

Feet were bare As walked the grounds The stars.

Above.

Maybe feet were froze enough I couldn’t feel the pain.

Yet halls are warm They give you time To melt.

NAUREEN FATIMA HOSSAIN

TRY TRY TRY TRY

//ARTS & REVIEWS

For those weak souls and hearts so faint, Will you be able to stomach that I am not the saint That I was meant to be?

I would not expect anyone to understand that I could not live While the threads still hung so loosely, and could give Away the stain that I could not clean from my given wings.

I am a devil’s advocate out of fear.

He promised me safety under my own conditions That I could breathe, walk and talk, in spite of this smear.

A smear – so hardly there, yet still there that would remind me Of the crime I’ve committed, of the strain I’ve endured with my relations.

Yet He could not do without the exception To the fools that are clueless of my role on that fateful day.

Why, you Beast. You brought upon another advocate of yours: The very man who I sought to shame in every way.

A POEM

Now here I rot: ready to face the fiery depths of Hell.

Should I regret, as I hear the knell My sins?

Is that what you want, “friend”?

For here I approach the end And I lose the luxuries that I sinned for Only to be left with the ridicule and no more.

Yet there you stand on the other side With His sneer plastered on your face.

You come across to the world as a saint, much like I did Yet I can see the darkness in your eyes The self-satisfaction of gaining revenge for my lies For every life I’ve ruined, yours included.

You will deny this until the end of time, But you and I have a shared darkness.

Whether I have more or you have less, It matters not when it comes down to the facts: You and I are the devil’s advocates.

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POET POET POET POET

TRY TRY ARE WE SHARING MUSIC,OR TRY APPROPRIATING IT? TRY Illustration by Joanne Leong

ARTS & REVIEWS

As the music industry and pop culture become increasingly globalised, how is it possible to know what’s original and what’s cultural appropriation?

With every new generation comes new waves of thought and style influenced by what’s seen, heard and experienced. As each generation has grown into popularity, influencing consumption and the ideals of an age, they have shaken off the norms of the past, redefining tastes and creating a unique voice for the people growing up and interpreting the world in a new way.

But do we too easily adopt something because we think it’s cool, without considering where it came from?

Embracing aspects of cultures different to our own, whilst disregarding their purpose and history is fiendish cultural appropriation, which trivialises sacred characteristics of heritage for another social group’s entertainment and fashion. This

GABRIELE NAKTINYTE

exhibits blatant disrespect and lack of understanding of people we call different. So how do we know if we’re unjustly culturally appropriating?

art needs to be shared, as it brings people together through common feeling and transient connection.

As soon as you draw lines between ethnicities and socio-economic backgrounds and dictate who can and who can’t produce music, or use or take part in culture, is when issues of race and difference boil over.

Hunger Games actress and highly publicised “cool” teenager, Amandla Stenberg, released a video earlier this year calling out current popular music stars for cultural appropriation. Yet the genres of Hip-Hop and R&B, although heavily rooted in African-American history, resonate with people across the world and of all different cultural and ethnic backgrounds. Therefore, when Katy Perry references Aretha Franklin in a video, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s appropriating her image to seem cool, but rather she, like millions across the world, was touched by what the artist produced and connected emotionally with her message and style. Artists like Iggy Azalea and Macklemore shouldn’t be shunned or accused of spreading white supremacy because music and

Regarding the argument that if you adopt a culture you need to adopt their issues, I think there shouldn’t be a bridge separating people from participating to start with.

For example, situations of racial discrimination in the U.S., such as the death of Trayvon Martin, or the riots in Baltimore, shouldn’t only be heard to members of a specific culture. They are crimes against humanity, and all of humanity should be outraged and speak out, not only those who associate themselves with Black culture.

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Although I’m a white girl in Australia, I truly love artists like Aretha Franklin and Otis Redding, and I’ll bop along when I hear Kendrick Lamar or Alicia Keys on the radio. This isn’t because I think they’re cool, and not so I can assume their struggles without knowing anything about them. It’s because music is a universal language and I can hear beyond the words of what they produce and feel what they’re feeling, based on a fundamental human connection that surpasses cultural boundaries.

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DO I SOUND GAY? ARTS & REVIEWS “You still sound like a lady talking... but a handsome lady. A bearded lady.”

New Acton’s Palace Electric Cinema hosted the Stronger than Fiction film festival, a celebration of documentary film, from 30 July to 9 August. Canberra was only the second Australian audience to see David Thorpe’s documentary ‘Do I Sound Gay?’ after it premiered at the Toronto Film Festival Last Year.

Thorpe, who stars in and directs the film, grew up in the 1980s in America’s “Bible belt”: Columbia, South Carolina. Back then, he explains, homosexuality was considered evil and the cause of a new plague called AIDS. How did one know if a person was gay? “Just listen to their voice,” Thorpe says.

He was bullied as a child for being gay but “cleaned up his act” because he knew it was “taboo” to resemble queer celebrities.

An interview with Dan Savage, a gay activist, elucidates this action: “A lot of us are self conscious about sounding gay because we were persecuted for that when we were young, and a lot of gay men carry that into adulthood. Many gay adolescents are very right to be worried about how they sound because it draws in violence.”

Thorpe’s interview with George Takei hits it on the head when Takei says: “It is insecurity within yourself that makes you conscious of how you sound.” This is Thorpe’s problem. Right at the beginning

JESSICA MASTERS of the documentary he tells us that his boyfriend has just left him, and this has prompted his self-doubt. He doesn’t understand why his voice changed from masculine to effeminate, despite friends explaining that it happened around the time Thorpe came out.

I wonder if the documentary tried to pull together a happy ending to appear as more of a complete package or symbol of hope. There are the obligatory statements of confidence but they jar with the rest of the film. Tim Gunn says: “If people hear my voice and identify me as gay today I will say thank you,” and one of Thorpe’s friends tells him: “Your voice is who you are. It’s from your body and personality and it’s you and we love that.” Final statements like these don’t sit right because they contrast with the film’s exploration of the assumption that the gay voice is bad or unattractive.

The idea that his ‘new voice’ was associated with his ‘new gay identity’ is not enough, so Thorpe goes to extensive voice lessons to find out more about his voice. The documentary spends a huge portion of its time on these voice lessons, which reveal the importance that Thorpe personally puts on them. But I feel that the lessons are a bit of a Band-Aid measure.

What is the point of trying to change your voice if you don’t really understand why you are trying to change it, or the social issues that surround your motivations?

For me, some of the most interesting parts of the film are where he dissects the voices of Disney villains, using examples such as Captain Hook from Peter Pan, Jafar from Aladdin, and Scar from The Lion King.

Put together in a clip show, it is obvious that the voices of the Disney villains all have gay or as Thorpe calls it “proto-gay” qualities, and he concludes that kids grow up with the idea that the gay voice is associated with evil and villainy.

I think I was expecting the documentary to get a bit more into the psychology of Thorpe’s issues than it actually did. For starters, it never questioned the accepted tropes of gay life: feminine sounding men were pansies and manly sounding men were hot lumberjacks, end of story.

Thorpe has a revelation when he achieves a deeper sounding voice through voice coaching - he says he “wants to go gayer and march down the street shouting rah rah rah!”. Very little is given to inform us of the reasoning behind Thorpe’s apparent change of heart, when he has spent the entire documentary trying to sound different from who he is.

The most intelligent parts of the documentary come from snippets of an interview with Dan Savage. When Thorpe explains code-switching, which is the act of switching between different modes of language and speaking - something which he says most gay men use when they “find themselves in situations when maybe we aren’t secure about being gay”, Savage

says that this switching can become a type of internalised homophobia, as gay men learn that how they sound is not accepted by society. However, the film does not fully explain how identity and voice are culturally constructed; except to credit the voices of rich men in movies and growing up in predominantly female families as an answer for creating “female microvariations” in the gay voice.

The documentary has a really interesting premise but I felt it failed its agenda. To be fair, it was facing some significant challenges: analysis of the gay personality involves social and historical opposition, as well as inherent differences of opinion.

I wonder if Thorpe did not delve deeper into the issues surrounding the gay voice (such as its beginnings in gender misogyny) because it was a personal journey and he was not able to challenge himself and his self-perception. The catalyst for his investigation was his boyfriend leaving him and his anxiety that he would be forever alone because he had a “gay voice”. A random group of men on a beach that Thorpe interviews explains his dilemma best: “You’re attracted to men and masculinity and you don’t want a woman in bed.” There is the option to get into gender politics but Thorpe doesn’t take it very far, which leaves a lot of socially constructed ideas that he proposes not properly explained. Overall, this documentary was interesting, but it could have been so much better and at the end I was left feeling disappointed.

REAL NEWS, FAKE NEWS, NO NEWS:

WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE? ARTS & REVIEWS Jon Stewart recently bid farewell to The Daily Show after sixteen years of relentlessly castigating the hypocrisy embedded within American politics, culture and the media. Not even the impending 2016 presidential election and the arrival of Donald Trump into the Republican primary race could keep Stewart from leaving and heading home to be with his children. He will be sorely missed. For many of us The Daily Show was the only news we watched. Despite technically being a “fake news” show, it was, for a long time, the only cable news program actually holding Congress, the White House and Big Money to account.

Since the announcement of his departure, the news media have been lamenting and reminiscing about Stewart’s patriotism, his heroism, and everything he’s done from his critical reporting of the 2000 election and the GFC to Obamacare and his skewering of politicians brave enough to make a guest appearance. The show undoubtedly is nothing less than an institution in broadcast media with two Peabody Awards to its name. However, it was obvious watching his final shows that Stewart wasn’t feeling it.

PRAMILAA SHIVAKKUMAR over again? And laughing about it? We’ve become so desensitized to the news. I personally always just end up switching it off and going to bed.

In his newest and final segment “The Daily Show: Destroyer of Worlds” Stewart eviscerated himself. He began by bringing up headlines from news and pop culture media throughout the years and lauding his power to eviscerate, annihilate, crush and demolish his targets. But what of his greatest takedowns: his demolition and destruction and evisceration of, for example, the banks, the terrorists and of course Fox News. The biting satire didn’t cut through. Fox News is influential as ever. Terrorist groups are rising in strength.

You get the picture. Throughout Stewart’s last few weeks you get the feeling you’re watching a man defeated. The fight in him is gone. He states, aghast: “The world is demonstrably worse than when I started.”

You can see the weariness on his face.

“This is a joke? Right?”

Looking at the camera for the last time, Jon began by saying “Bullshit is everywhere…”. It was as if he were a dying father taking his last opportunity to counsel his child on the woes of the world.

Jon Stewart genuinely cares. He cares that corporations and governments bullshit their way into screwing our lives. He cares about us and if it weren’t for his children he would probably continue to devote the rest of his life to calling “Bullshit” for when everyone else just cbf. He pleads in the end, “If you smell something, say something”. A tacit reminder that all of the foot stomping and horrified facial expressions mean nothing if no one takes any action. Stewart is funny but laughing while the world burns to the ground is not that much better than being ignorant of the fact.

Dennis Leary, who appears on the show in its final week, tells Stewart he’s doing the smart thing by retiring at the top of his game. But considering the declining ratings over the past three years it is clear that Jon is not the only one not feeling it.

What is the point of tuning into the news and hearing the same stories over and

At the same time Salman Rushdie insists, “it is clear that redescribing a world is the necessary first step towards changing it”.

The Daily Show is engaged in a war over

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the nature of reality in the same way the American writer Richard Wright was at war with the reality imposed by white Americans. Rushdie and Wright write fiction, but the principle is just as relevant if not more so in the context of the news media.

Journalism is not objective, normative, or all knowing. Without The Daily Show there would be no one to displace Fox News’ reality. Thus, the arrival on to the scene of Stephen Colbert (The Colbert Report [unfortunately ended]) and recently, the likes of John Oliver (Last Week Tonight) and Larry Wilmore (with The Nightly Show) ‒ has meant that, after a very long time with the Daily Show as the only beacon of sanity in a lunatic asylum full of Bill O’Reillys and Glen Becks, there is now a rounder team continuing to carry the baton for sound political analysis and diversity of opinion in the face of Fox’s “fair and balanced” truth.

The only problem though is that conservatives still only watch Fox News and liberals still only watch John Oliver.

How we deal with that, I don’t know.

W

Week 5, Semester 2, 2015.

//ARTS & REVIEWS

WORONI RADIO PRESENTS

NOT QUITE DISCO F I N N Born in Melbourne and brought up by a cello player and a Kenyan born British immigrant who was pathetically infatuated with the corny tunes of ABBA and Blondie, my life has always been festooned with music. I grew up on a concoction of classic rock, classical and country that (somehow) blossomed into a love for disco and house.Fast forward a few years through events like Strictly Vinyl at The Exchange, Sadar Bahar at Section 8 combined with the violin and guitar I studied at school and you’ll have an idea of the musical lens I am peering through.

I didn’t join Woroni with much of an idea of what I wanted to

P Ë D E R S É N

achieve with my music. I just sat down with Isaac Dugdale (the wonderful editor of Woroni Radio) and said I wanted to do something combining my love for geography and disco music. That night I ran through my collection of Carmen Candido, Yo-Yo Ma and Itzhak Perlman and arrived at the song that would become the springboard into the endless pool of world music. The song was MerryGo-Round by Japanese artist Tatsuro Yamashita. The song itself lead me to other Japanese artists like Minako Yoshida, Haruomi Hosono and Toshiki Kadomatsu and thus what would become the playlist for the first show ‘Not Quite Disco in Japan’ was formed.

Although the music plays a huge role I think the general community around unknown and forgotten songs also composes a large part of the story. While the ACT may not yet have an audience quite like Melbourne groups like the Persian Rug Store, Soul Crane, Boxcutter are all the seeds of an independent music scene that can help to make Canberra to be another home that embraces little heard music.

I’m not exactly sure where this is going for me, but I’m excited that we can try and create something here – World music is a deep and arcane vault one from which I hope you can join me in delving into.

You can hear the show on Wednesdays from 8-9pm and catch me at Bonnie Brae Music Festival Zfrom the 20th-22nd of November.

W

WORONI No.10 Vol.67

GIG

R E V I E W: G I G

DEATH C AB FOR CUTIE

AT

//ARTS & REVIEWS

ANU

ARTS & REVIEWS Hailing from Seattle, Washington, and fresh from their stint at Splendour in the Grass, Death Cab for Cutie played to a sell-out crowd on Thursday 30th of July.

Unbeknownst to the line outside, the band themselves had warmed up to murmurs of “man, these roadies are really talented”.

Hyping the crowd even more were the slick moves of Say Hi who accompanied Death Cab from Seattle seemingly in order to mesh a laptop dance party with a lightheartened Q&A. And when the lights went down, there was nothing but Death Cab. Playing a 25 track set spanning their back catalogue, there was something for everyone to enjoy. Despite the 600+ audience packed like sardines, each song felt as though it became more intimate and personal than the last. This infamous group managed to make each person in the crowd feel like it was a private show. Passenger Seat was the highlight of this almost one-onone experience, seeing lead vocalist/ guitarist Ben Gibbard and pianist Zac Rae croon to a near-silent audience, who were mesmerized by every melancholy note.

R E V I E W:

3 0 / 7 0 , E R A H , L OW F LU NG A N D Z A N D E R G E C KO A T L A D E DA

BAR

ARTS & REVIEWS

RACHEL HOLLAND On the flipside was the high energy of the rock songs which had made the band famous. Hearing the band as a 5-piece, since the addition of Zac and Dave Depper as touring members, emphasized their Seattle-rock origins. Songs such as Doors Unlocked and Open and The Sound of Settling gave the audience a mere taste of each member’s individual talents, as well as their cohesiveness as a group. Having each classic song stripped down and then rebuilt from the drums provided a truly immersive musical experience. Quoting my concert-going-partner: “I’ve never seen a group more born to play music together than them.”

If you’re getting bored with the bars that Civic has to offer, then it is time to check out La De Da in Belconnen. On Thursday 7th August, the friendly staff of La De Da presented an evening for appreciators of live music to experience smooth beats and chilled vibes. The bar is becoming a cultural hub for Canberra with its upcoming Gig guide, craft drinks and murals. The art adorning the walls is a major feature of the bar and worth checking out.

Local band ERAH grooved the audience through their electro-soul beats. Made up of ANU School of Music Students, ERAH is an upcoming act in Canberra with two of their singles being featured on Triple J Unearthed. ERAH performed a mix of originals and covers including a slow soul version of Adele’s Rolling in the Deep. Their final song, Thirsty, was popular as the vocals of Kirrah Amosa soared through the crowd and worked beautifully with the rest of the band.

The headline of the night was 30/70, an eclectic group direct from Monash in Melbourne. The 5-piece band took

When asked by Dave how I found their performance, all I could tell him was that it had been religious. It wouldn’t be possible to quite capture every facet of what made the concert so special, but I can be confident in telling you that I will never experience anything quite like it again.

JARED ESPOSIT the audience on a musical journey by combining elements of hip-hop, rap, electro, jazz and blues. This mix allowed for a variety of music and resulted in everyone getting out of their seats and groovin. The keyboard player’s improvisations blended marvellously with the walking bass, rhythmic drums and female vocals.

The Gig also featured ambient beats from local solo act Low Flung whose instrumental music captures dreamscapes. If you are interested check out Low Flung’s bandcamp profile.

Zander Gecko’s late night vibes also featured. This electronic dance group moved their audience with their hit mix single Somebody which can be found on Triple J Unearthed.

WHAT AUSTRALIA’S ASHES DEFEAT HAS REALLY TAUGHT US ABOUT…

LIFE

EASY LISTING (WORONI RADIO)

HUMOUR & SATIRE

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“Stop dating and start batting”: During Shane Warne’s time as teenager dominating state cricket he was told to “Stop dating and start batting”. Warne’s coaches were frustrated with his over the top social life and he was required to make cricket his priority. While socialising is important, what we can take from this is sometimes it’s more important to knuckle down and “start batting”. To focus on what really matters will get you far and you’ll spend longer doing it.

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“It can be difficult to swing a cricket bat with one hand”: This advice also

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follows another piece of advice, “Two hands for beginners”.

“Don’t have too tight a grip”: In both life and sport, it is very important to sit back and relax. Too often during the Ashes the Australian’s failed to relax and then crumbled under the pressure. Having too tight a grip in life can cause you to lose focus, gain stress, and even incur awkward injuries.

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“It’s always funny when someone gets hit in the balls”: It was classic when it happened in the first test to Captain Cook and in any situations it always brings a laugh.

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Handle the ball with care”: In test cricket the ball has to last all 90 overs and can provide you with all sorts of swing. Whatever your “balls” are in life, if protected they can help provide the swing which you might require.

“A successful partnership can really improve batting”: Cricket can seem like a very lonely sport. So often it seemed like Michael Clarke felt like his was on his own when he was batting in the face of a very young Root. Always remember that your partner is there to help and plenty of communication is

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important. When you are on your own in life it is always valuable to appreciate this. However it can be very unsatisfying when you are batting well and your partner gets out early.

Other valuable lessons: “Try using your weaker hand when batting”, “It’s easier to bat for longer when you have the home ground advantage”, and “Wives and girlfriends have the potential to interrupt a great batting session”.

Forget those wankers that let us down in the Ashes! Good luck and bat well!

YES, ANOTHER ADAM GOODES ARTICLE SPORTS Rarely has there been such an on field issue that divides the nation as much as this one - placing a lens on the racial undertones of Australian society. This issue has transcended the football field to such a degree that the national discourse involves three state premiers, Hollywood stars, billionaire businessmen and the Prime Minister himself.

Why you ask?

The significantly audible boos of Adam Goodes not only seem out of the ordinary, but capture the underlying national misunderstanding of what constitutes a racist act. For too many years, there has been a skewed misunderstanding of racism as an intent rather than something experienced. Which (to use a very extreme example) is why a protester at an antiIslam demonstration calling for the end of Islam will get agitated for being called a racist.

This association of racism with intent has resulted in a plethora of arguments and excuses from spectators and critics alike, offering justifications for their actions.

To the spectators who claim that he “stages” for free kicks. While this may be true in rare occasions, it does not justify the consistent booing of a player for every single possession in every game for a year. Comparatively, serial offenders in “dirty tactics” such as Steve Johnson or Hayden Ballyntyne would typically only be booed for the remainder of game a fter a “staged” free kick.

According to conservative commentator Andrew Bolt, the source of this persistent

KUNAL VANKADARA booing originates when Goodes singled out, “humiliating”, a 13 year old girl in the middle of a game due to racial taunts. An argument which forgets to mention that it was impossible for Goodes to have known the age of the offender before turning and pointing, instead reacting to being referred to as a “Monkey”.

together on Saturday night.

While imperfections in the treatment and discourse surrounding minorities still exist, and will likely exist in the near future, the discussion of these issues has and will continue to move Australian society in the right direction.

Another justification for the jeering comes from Steve Price, who has accused him of “parading his indigenous culture” during the round dedicated to celebrating the contribution of indigenous players in the AFL. This justification not only sounds ludicrous, but feeds into Waleed Aly’s analysis that “ Australia (as a whole) remains a very tolerant society until its minorities become vocal’’.

Despite it all, the explanation of the intent of booing should be irrelevant, due to the fact that Goodes has come out multiple times and publicly declared that he sees the booing as racially motivated and offensive. Therefore in the face of this evidence the continuation of the booing can only be seen as being racially motivated.

The past weekend’s round of football has made it abundantly clear that the racists remain an extremely small and waning minority. Support for Goodes has come from not only from public figures, but all 18 teams and opposition fans making Goodes feel “very loved”.

Highlights of the overwhelming support include on field aboriginal celebrations, a 1-minute standing ovation, the adoption of indigenous jerseys by teams and culminating in Sydney and Geelong running through a single united banner

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Illustrations by Henry Dwyer

ORONI COMPLAINTS? CALL DIRECTLY AND REGISTER YOUR COMPLAINT HERE: (02) 6125 2444

PHYSIOTHERAPY: A

PUBLIC

I was in for a surprise, however. My relationship with my physio was not what I was expecting. Far from my visions of sedulous massages and that kind of backslappy homoeroticism that I associate with pro-sports, I was instead subjected to the kind of ritualised torture that normally happens

ANNOUNCEMENT

ZENO OF ELEA

HUMOUR & SATIRE Earlier this year, I hurt myself at the gymn1.

I quite like telling this story, because it gives people the impression that I’m some kind of real, productive, gymn-frequenting member of society. However, probably because this impression is an outright lie, I managed to rupture a disc right at the tail end of my spine.

This injury caused me to pay a visit to a physio for the first time in my life, which is also a fact that I’m unreasonably proud of. In my head, the only people who are able to talk about “my physio” are people right up the pointy end of athletic achievement and human physical grace, who dwell in a kind of semi-mythical pro-sports Valhalla, rubbing shoulders with Cadel Evans and Usain Bolt while they drink brightly-coloured Gatorade™ and talk about “bringing their A-game” and “taking it one match at a time”. And this was basically how I envisaged myself, while I was dragging my preternaturally pale and slightly wheezing body in to see the physio. A tragically wounded sports hero, cut down in his prime.

SERVICE

It was interestingggg!” I blubbered through the haze of pain. For some reason he still didn’t believe me.

in far-off CIA black sites. Indeed, when I walked into the room, I was asked a series of questions: what’s your name, what’s your age, have you had good day, what seems to be the problem, etc. However, I must have not have answered these questions believably, however, because “my physio” soon began his program of enhanced interrogation techniques.

After his skilled demonstration of human torture origami, he told me he was going to try needling the area where the disc rupture was. “Is that like acupuncture?”

I asked, hopefully. Acupuncture couldn’t be too bad, I thought, it’s just one of those mildly unpleasant things my hippie friends swear are good for you, like armpit hair and veganism. This was the wrong thing to ask.

“Like acupuncture, except evidence-based” he growled menacingly, and proceeded to pull a box of enormous-looking syringes from a dusty cupboard. I decided that now was not the time to mention that the box read, in large letters on the side, “ACUPUNCTURE NEEDLES,” but I did mentally note that, where medical equipment normally says “STERILE,” this box had “EXTREMELY CLEAN.” This was not terribly reassuring.

And so to begin with, I found myself being folded up into a kind of elaborate human pretzel, and, after my arms had been manipulated into a complex Möbius strip behind my lower back and my legs had been plaited into an ornate decorative braid that finished somewhere above my head, “my physio” very expertly placed his rather sharp elbow into a very delicate part of my musculo-skeletal make-up that I had never previously known existed, and pushed as hard as he could. Through the complexly unpleasant pain that followed, I began to admire his forethought in tying up all of my available limbs, just before I began to very dearly need to kick him. I also began to wonder which 16th century Spanish Jesuit he had learnt such effective inquisitorial techniques from. “I have had a good day!”

I wept, hoping he would accept that I was telling the truth, “I had class in the morning!

What happened next will pass without comment, and we will take up the story again with me lying face-down on a table with a dense assortment of pins buried deep in my buttocks. At this point in the story, “my physio” also announced he was going to leave me there “for five minutes or so”

and to “relax” while he went and got coffee, and went out the door. Now was the time to make good my escape! I sprang into action, and very delicately moved the big toe on my left foot in a vaguely door-wards direction – and then very quickly abandoned any idea of flight when this caused an agonisingly un-fun wave of weird deep-buttock spasming. Any hope of escape being therefore dashed, my only option was to just lay awkwardly there like a skewered mullet.

So please. Next time you’re thinking of visiting the physio, whether it’s for your joints, your back, or like me, simply because of their pro-sporting cachet, I would like you to picture me, lying there stiffly on an unfamiliar table, alone, lonely, uncertain; my bum bristling with quills like a particularly ugly echidna, weeping softly to myself as I attempt to find an answer to the question “How are you?” that my tormentor would believe. Think of me. And reconsider.

[1] Gymn is the Ancient Greek shortening of gymnasium

NEW RESEARCH REVEALS FIRE DRILLS

AS

C AU S E

HUMOUR & SATIRE “And in the streets, the children screamed The lovers cried and the poets dreamed, But not a word was spoken The church bells all were broken.”[1] But the fire alarms weren’t. Plus there were a lot of noisy college kids running around in a rather mishap fashion. A plausible crime scene of shaving cream and scrabbling limbs clawed out their cosy beds by the relentless yelping of the fire alarm.

A recent study at the ANU has discovered a reasonably strong correlation between fire alarms and a decline in student wellbeing. In a one-of-a-kind experiment, researchers interviewed college residents mid-evacuation, asking them to rate their happiness factor on a scale of “peachy keen” to “I hate my fucking life”. The results were truly astonishing.

OF

BRAIN

CANCER

IVANA SMOJVER The study revealed that despite fire drills being a mandatory procedure for ANU colleges, there was ample evidence to indicate that planned evacuations could trigger Acute Drill Disorder, or what is otherwise known as ADD for short. “It’s fuarkin’ cold, mate,” reported one student in the Johns trial, while another turned his face to the sky and wailed “Canberra, you cold-hearted bitch!”

the only treatment is to simply wait and drink lots of water, because that is society’s cure for everything these days.

The researchers of the Fire Mobility League (FML) study also emphasised that students may increase their risk of developing ADD by sleeping in a unitard, or running out of the shower with shaving cream still on their leg(s) which appeared to the trend at Burton and Garran Hall this semester. At UniLodge, a number of residents flaunted their Victoria Secret and Nike undergarments resulting in numerous students complaining of frostbite in some unexpected places due to cheap labour involved in manufacture.

Symptoms of ADD may present as mild hyperactivity, inability to (get back to) sleep, intense delusions of bacon and coffee, irritability, excessive whinging and in rare cases, productivity due to increase in hours spent in wakeful consciousness[2].

Symptoms usually appear at the first sound of the bell, and may last up to a week after exposure. Students should be warned that prevention is of utmost importance as once symptoms develop,

The scientists behind this groundbreaking research are yet to find a complete treatment but anticipate the answer may be lie somewhere in the

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cutting edge science behind the creation of vegemite chocolate and caffeine pills in a glucose base! In the meantime, anecdotal evidence provided by several college representatives suggests that students affected by ADD may stare at firemen as a form of temporary symptomatic relief[3].

If you have been affected by ADD, don’t go to lectures, eat a big breakfast and please contact a youth advisor for a good ol’ yak about the necessity of fire drills.

[1] McLean, Don. “American Pie.” American Pie, 1971.

[2] Wakeful consciousness is here intended to mean automatism at best.

[3] Cf Fireman Study for further discussion of fireman as excellent distractions.