Woroni: Edition 9, 2012

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BEING A GAY MAN IN INDONESIA

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BATMAN & THE SUPERHERO COMPLEX

99 SPONSORS BUT AN OLYMPICS AIN’T ONE

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WORONI The Australian National University Newspaper Since 1948

State of the Union Under Attack As Elections Begin two jobs simultaneously.”

NAKUL LEGHA Pressure is mounting on the ANU Union This combative electoral tactic comes as with current ANU Students’ Association broader concerns are raised about the UnPresident Dallas Proctor and Education Of- ion’s work. Woroni understands that Board ficer Tom Barrington-Smith launching with- members have failed to attend regular meetering public attacks on its competency and ings with Chancelry about the allocation of transparency in their bid for seats on the the Student Services Amenities Fees or atUnion Board. The Board manages ANU Bar tend meetings of the Grants and Affiliations and food outlets and facilities in the Union and Student Experience Committees. These Building and is holding elections this week meetings are attended by other student orfor three undergraduate seats and one post- ganisations including ANU Student Media graduate seat. (publisher of Woroni), ANUSA and the ANU Mr Proctor and Mr Barrington-Smith Sport & Recreation Association. have accused the Board of “hiding its acLast edition, Woroni revealed the Board tivities from students”, pointing to the 2011 took several months to advertise and replace Annual General a vacant seat folMeeting which lastlowing Joel Dened ten minutes and nerley’s resigna“consistent failure” The ANU Union manages most of the for-profit busi- tion in March to adequately publi- nesses on campus, including the Union Building (the as he undertook cise board meetings. brutalist building in Union Court with Subway and study abroad. Mr They also attacked the bar) with a turnover of $4.2m. The Union Board Dennerley’s plans the Union’s retail consists of 9 members – 6 undergrad, 1 post-grad, for exchange were and food operations, and 2 staff members – who manage the Union for known for months two-year terms (post-grads have one-year terms). calling the Union’s The Union Board is responsible for food outlets in in advance by the Functions business a the Refectory, events at ANU bar, the Newsagency Board. He is still “joke”. listed as a “Current and Union Building facilities.

Their actions have Board Member” been slammed by The ANU Students’ Association (ANUSA) is the on the Union webthe Chair of the Un- representative body for undergraduate students. site.

It is responsible for student advocacy in educaion Board, Michael Mr Hiscox retional matters, social events and essential legal and Hiscox, who told sponded: “The Woroni: “Dallas and welfare services. It comprises an executive, college Board has set up representatives, department officers and general Tom are using their representatives who all serve for a year. Elections a Constitutional positions in ANUSA Review Committake place in Week 5. for the purpose of tee, that includes electioneering and I ANUSA is responsible for Bush Week, Universal re pre s e nt at i v e s believe that is inap- Lunch Hour, Student Space, managing clubs and from ANUSA and societies and student advocacy campaigns. propriate.”

PARSA, to look at As Union Board terms begin in September this problem to ensure that students get the of this year, Mr Proctor and Mr Barrington- most out of there student representatives.”

Smith would serve simultaneously on both Appearing cognisant of the Union’s shortorganisations if elected. Mr Proctor argued comings, fellow Board member Sam Staplethis would “serve to bring the two organisa- ton added that forthcoming constitutional tions much closer together, which can only amendments would “include numerous acbenefit students.” countability and transparency measures such In response to concerns about adequately as more OGMs [and] more stringent obligafulfilling their ANUSA responsibilities he tions on Directors to fulfil their roles.” said: “The Union [position] is a two year term Further concerns have been raised about [so] we have no qualms about working that the highly politicised nature of Union eleclittle bit harder for the first 3 months to do CONTINUED ON PAGE 4

ABBOTT: COVETING THY OXEN

NO. 9 VOL 64

AUG07

WHAT IS THE UNION?

A bird in the hand is worth expulsion at Johns LISA VISENTIN

John XXIII College has added three more names to an ever-expanding list of expelled alumni, with three male residents excluded in connection with a room prank featuring a dead seagull. Woroni has learned that three residential contracts were immediately terminated after an extensive investigation conducted by College Administration identified three boys as the perpetrators of the roomand-gull violation.

Woroni understands that the prank unfolded spontaneously after the fateful discovery of an expired seagull on an early-morning journey home from Mooseheads during the mid-year break. While the cause of the bird’s death remains unknown, speculation abounds that it has something to do with the

fact that it was really fucking far from the sea.

Enlightened by the wisdom that only a sampling of the finest Moose brews can impart, the boys carried the carcass back to College before placing it in its final resting place in a friend’s room.

As some animals are want to do after they cease to exist, the stench of decomposing gull began wafting through the corridors.

Initially, mistaken for the aroma of the College’s Sunday night dinner, the bird was discovered by cleaners a short time later. Woroni has been informed that the prank was made possible by the fact that the room’s occupant had left his door unlocked before departing for the holidays. In addition to putrefying avian flesh, College Administration apparCONTINUED ON PAGE 2

18 CAMPUS STYLE 23 TED TALKS 11COME AT ME, BRO

NEWS//2

A bird in the hand is worth expulsion at Johns

Article continued from page 1

ently smelt bullshit on this point, with insiders telling Woroni that Administration toyed with the idea of fingerprinting master keys in a hilariously CSI-attempt to catch the culprits. Ultimately, the all-seeing omnipresent eye of the Administration brought an end to the investigations with CCTV footage exposing the boys’ identities.

Although unconfirmed, the boys are suspected members of the College’s renegade team of avant-garde interior designers, whose infamous bedroom blitz operations include last year’s controversial redecoration of several residents’ rooms with pig carcasses.

Operating under anonymity, the group’s endless pursuit of stylistic innovation has been largely unwelcomed by College Administration who have categorically rejected the introduction of decomposing animals as incompatible with the building’s Soviet-inspired aesthetic.

In a statement issued to Woroni, Steve Foley, Head of John XXIII College, confirmed the exclusions:

“There were a number of exclusions last semester because of property damage in residents’ rooms. The College takes a dim view of conduct that can’t be reconciled with those standards of conduct outlined in the Handbook and has acted in a timely, prompt and fair manner on each of the occasions that it has had to respond.”

Woroni understands that, since taking up the Johns’ helm at the beginning of 2012, the Foley Administration’s iron-fisted rule has been characterised by a strictly disciplinarian, zero-tolerance approach to dissidents and troublemakers which has seen five people expelled from Johns this year and the College’s beloved “Out the Back Day” repeatedly cancelled.

The Administration’s merciless handling of this gee-up fiasco has left some pondering whether this signals the end of Johns’ infamous and colourful history of room violations, and whether the College is now headed down the path of becoming Canberra’s most expensive daycare.

BRIEFLY WITH SHAN-VERNE LIEW Olympics: Performance and expectations While the Australian Olympic Commission (AOC) and USA Today used prior athlete performance to develop projection models, PricewaterhouseCoopers (PwC) and Total Medal Count Rank st 1 nd 2 3rd 4th 5th

AOC

USA Today

Russia (97) USA (94) China (93) UK (48) Germany (47)

China (85) Russia (83) USA (82) UK (67) Germany (61)

Country (Medal Count) Pricewaterhouse US News Coopers US (113) China (87) Russia (68) UK (54) AUS (42)

Transport Update

Liv Clark Farz Edraki Nakul Legha Yasmin Masri Gus McCubbing Lisa Visentin Cam Wilson

USA (103) China (94) Russia (67) UK (62) AUS (42)

Actual (as of 4 Aug) China US Korea France UK

ROMMEL VARGHESE

In Ohio, 46% of voters said Obama would better handle the economy, and 45% picked As many wait for the US election cycle, Romney. Pennsylvanians gave Obama higher President Obama and Mitt Romney are marks on the economy, where 48% named weighing strategies in the swing states. the President as better on the economy and It is too early to name a favourite from the 44% favoured Romney. polls, but the data will be crucial for DemoHow the economic data projects recovery crat and Republican strategists shaping in key battleground states will be interesting their respective campaigns for the next few in the coming few months. months.

The Obama administration will hope for The latest CBS News/New York Times and improvements to the unemployment rate, Quinnipiac University polls presented good while closely monitoring the crisis in Europe news for Obama, with a majority of voters and a possible slowdown in the Chinese backing him in three critical battleground economy. states. Obama led Romney by 51% to 45% in Romney’s team have attacked Obama’s Florida, 50%-44% in Ohio and 53%-42% in record on the economy, particularly in Pennsylvania. regards to employment opportunities and Kevin Liptak from CNN, and other influsupporting small businesses. The economy, ential pollsters, have noted that Florida and unemployment, taxes and how to manage Ohio are considered toss-ups in November’s the federal government’s $14 trillion debt general election. CNN believes Pennsylvania will be leading issues in 2012. will be more favourable to Obama.

Other issues, such as the healthcare debate “If today were November 6, Obama would and immigration, are also expected to feasweep the key swing states of Florida, Ohio ture heavily in this campaign. Foreign policy and Pennsylvania, and, if history is any is beginning to mark its presence, with Mitt guide, into a second term in the Oval Office,” Romney recently making trips to Britain, Peter Brown, who is assistant director of Poland and Israel. the Quinnipiac University Polling Institute, With US Secretary of State Hillary Clinwrote in a statement. ton scheduled to retire at the end of year, Both sides have also campaigned hard to Obama’s administration is playing an active win independents. Among identified inderole in dialogue with the ASEAN nations pendents, Obama edges Romney in Florida and China about the situation in the South 47%-46%, and Ohio 47%-44%.

China Sea. The President has a more robust lead Similar steps are being taken in relation to among independents in Pennsylvania, by Egypt and Syria.

58%-36%.

Over the next few months, Woroni will The economy will likely play an important focus more specifically on these issues and role in determining campaign strategies, but talk about the key decisions, including Mitt voters are split between Obama and RomRomney’s Vice President nomination and ney. In Florida, 47% said Romney would do how both sides are galvanising their cama better job handling economic issues, while paigns in the battleground states.

45% named Obama.

Mosque Update

Action’s new 14.5-meter rigid busses are expected to have a maximum capacity of 101 seating and standing passengers, up from a capacity of 67 passengers in the fleet’s old 12.5m rigid busses. However, the company’s new 14.5m busses, which are rated to carry 107 passengers, have attracted substantial cost criticisms.

EDITORIAL BOARD

US News relied on socioeconomic factors as predictors of Olympic performance. All four models projected Australia finishing with a medal count in the top 10.

US Election 2012: A Swing And A Miss

ACT Human Rights and Discrimination Commissioner Helen Watchirs has recommended that the ACT’s Discrimination Act be extended to better include provisions against religious discrimination. The Commissioner said that flyers distributed by the Concerned Citizens of Canberra, which opposes the construction of a mosque in Gungahlin, were “undoubtedly offensive” but unlikely to be in breach of the Act.

SUB EDITORS Shan-Verne Liew Gareth Robinson Alex O’Sullivan Vincent Chiang Jess Millen Josh Chu-Tan Ben Henschke Fergus Hunter Maggie Thompson

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NEWS// 3

ANU Welcomes Brazilians

Myanmar Reforms Progress Gradually JESSI AVALON

from those who had hoped for a more forthright defense of minority rights from the A recent massacre of Rohingya in Myanhuman rights icon. mar’s northwest has refocused international Yet, in less politically charged circumattention on inter-ethnic violence and mistances, Suu Kyi has made efforts to promote nority rights in Myanmar. the welfare of disenfranchised ethnic comIt has also called attention to the limitamunities. Her visit to the Mae La refugee tions of Daw Aung San Suu Kyi, who is now camp in June was accompanied by calls for being measured against the lofty ideals of the international community to continue her image. financial support for displaced people on the According to government figures, over 60 Thai Burma border. were left dead in violence between Buddhist With greater liberty to speak, Suu Kyi Rakhine and Muslim Rohingya. Numbering now faces the challenge of meeting the high 800,000, the Rohingya have lived in Myanexpectations of diverse communities with mar for generations, but have been denied divergent interests. Concurrently, Suu Kyi’s citizenship since 1982.

National League for Democracy party holds Bangladesh has called on the international only 42 of 664 parliamentary seats, which is community to do more to help resolve the an indication of their power to effect policy ongoing issue, claiming that it now must re- change. fuse asylum to Rohingya due to population In conflicts stemming back 60 years, and financial restraints. ceasefires and seemingly seismic shifts in Before Suu Kyi’s release from house arrest ethnic army-government relations may last year, questions remained regarding her be limited in changing conditions on the stance on ethnically based conflict and opground. pression. Refugees, who were displaced by Representatives of Shan human rights and brutal military action, expressed uncertainty news reporting groups stated that ongoing in their hopes that she would move to addistrust, disconnect between government dress their plight. agreements and military conduct, and a failWhen conflict reignited, Suu Kyi underure to resolve underlying issues were serious took highly publicized international travel, impediments to peace. her first venture from Myanmar in 24 years.

Even in the face of new and celebrated Suu Kyi’s minimal response was to encour- ceasefires, skirmishes, arrests and killings age Buddhists to “have sympathy for micontinue to be reported. norities” – a request that has been met with SWAN, a human rights organization, has anger from some in the Rakhine commurecommended that intermational pressure nity, who regard the Rohingya as unwanted on the Burmese government continue. Suu foreigners.

Kyi has encouraged continued international When asked whether the Rohingya should aid to Burmese refugees, with NGOs noting be granted Myanmar citizenship, Suu Kyi that circumstances have not changed so as answered, “I don’t know”. Some have interto allow asylum seekers to return to their preted her comment as an awareness of the homes. sensitive and divisive nature of the issue, and Though much has changed, it appears that the new demand on her to appease her local the government and military still dominate political capital. the marginalized of Burma.

The response has also sparked dismay

RUOHAN ZHAO Over 30 Brazilian exchange students have swapped Brazil’s warm sunshine for the bitter Canberra cold.

Brazil’s new Science Without Borders programme sends Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics (STEM) students overseas for a year to broaden and develop their skills.

The program started last year, but it has expanded into a global network that includes all of Australia’s Group of Eight universities.

Brazil plans to send over 75,000 students from around Brazil overseas in the next 4 years.

Successful program applicants have their university fees fully paid, and are given a A$1,100 monthly allowance.

“I don’t think I would be living at college if I didn’t receive this money,” said Matheus Portela, who is a mechatronics engineering student.

The experience has been a major culture shock. “In Brazil, I have 18 different calculus classes. There are only 50 people per class,” Matheus said.

He clocks on average 30 contact hours per week in Brazil, and said that he is readjusting to weekly tutorials and large classes.

ANU students have welcomed the influx of exchange students with open arms. ‘It’s nice having some South American flair at ANU. Everyone’s hoping they play soccer for us!” second year student Jess Hioe said.

The aspirations of the program are tied to

Brazil’s economic and social development.

“Brazil sends the students overseas to get the best possible training to help build the economy for the 21st century,” said Dr Tom Chodor, who recently completed his PhD on Latin American development.

Investment in human capital is central to Brazil’s economy. “It enables them to be competitive in the new market economy.

This ensures that when they join the workforce, they are not disadvantaged.”

“The Brazilians have always seen themselves as a future superpower and now it’s time is here,” Dr Chodor added. “Brazil came out of the Global Financial Crisis relatively unscathed and has experienced consistent economic growth. For the first time, more than half of Brazil’s population is middle class.”

The signs are all positive. Brazil is a G20 member and has considerable lobbying power in the World Trade Organisation and International Monetary Fund. Data shows that many are moving from countries such as Spain and Portugal to Brazil. Politically, Brazil is pushing for a permanent seat on the United Nations Security Council.

Whatever the future holds, the Brazilians are making most of their time at ANU. “I’m really enjoying it here and we’re planning trips around Australia in the holidays,” Matheus said.

Maybe they’ll have picked up an Aussie twang by the time they return to Brazil.

House Prices Fall but Rents Still Soar MARIE NGIAM

With property prices rising in most Australian states, ACT property values experienced the sharpest fall in the June quarter this year.

However, this is unlikely to alleviate rental fees.

According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS), average Australian capital city house prices increased by 0.5%, for the first time since the end of 2010.

In contrast, ACT properties experienced a drop of 1.3%. This trend was followed by Hobart and Melbourne, where house prices fell 0.4% in both cities Housing Industry Association ACT executive director Neil Evans, speaking to Canberra Times, said that a fall in house prices might be a positive indication that Canberra had the right number of houses for its population.

Many economic forecasters are less optimistic, and claim that the fall in housing prices reflects an emerging oversupply of housing, where Canberra’s building boom has outstripped population growth.

BIS Shrapnel predicts that falling house prices will accompany a decrease in household spending and fewer job vacancies.

The ACT has had above-average population growth at 2% compared to the national average of 1.4%, but will likely be affected by jobs cuts in the Australian Public Service, together with the weakening of the ACT’s construction trade.

However, the ABS found that apartment, unit and townhouse prices in Canberra experienced a significantly softer fall in the year to December 2011.

Sliding less than 1.8%, a ACT Real Estate Institute spokesperson told Canberra Times that apartment complexes are more appealing for Canberrans. ‘’There are a lot of professional couples, [and] single people who prefer the lifestyle of an apartment where they can just lock up if they go travelling or whatever it might be.”

Unfortunately, the fall in housing prices is unlikely to affect Canberra’s rental market.

Analysts are adamant that Australia’s housing market remains strong.

This means rental prices are likely to remain competitive. Vacancy rates have remained strong up to June this year. This does not come as good news to students residing in the capital, where rental prices are viewed as unaffordable at best, exorbitant at worst.

NEWS//4

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Article continued from page 1 tions. Unlike ANUSA elections where each ticket has a spending cap of $50 per contested position, there is no cap on electoral spending for Union elections. An ANUSA representative told Woroni: “It is problematic because tickets supported by political parties have greater access to funds meaning an uneven playing field”.

The ‘Grow Your Union’ ticket has faced accusations from some current Board members about its connections to the Liberal party and the ACT Young Liberals. The ticket, under which several Board members including Xinyu Ru and Sally Renouf have run in the past, told Woroni: “No 2012 candidate is a member or has ever had a significant connection to any political party or political group.”

Back To The Future’s candidates similarly distanced themselves from any political affiliation.

The ‘Fresh’ ticket is understood to be a revamp of Labor affiliated ‘Stimulate’ which has run in past Union elections. Sources told Woroni that the ‘Stimulate’ brand was dropped as a result of the “trouncing they received at the hands of Golden Ticket in the

What they promised and what we got Major union reform More private outlets Big social agenda Redeveloping Caterina’s Longer opening hours in the Union Online voting for Union elections $4 dollar lunches in the Union Environmental audit

BACK TO THE FUTURE ANU Union should be the hub of life on campus. The function capacity is wasted with poor value and options; a window into1980s kitsch. Renovating the top-floor is an urgent priority! Late bar opening, especially during gigs and well provide nighttime hot food as well as free sausages for all clubs and societies to use the Union BBQ. Nothing is impossible!!! Except for buying a decent Union coffee. We have qualified Baristas and a former Café manager, who know how easy it is to provide cheap, quality coffee.

Stores share the same kitchen but maintain separate shopfronts to provide the illusion of choice. New leases will genuinely increase choice, and ensure the Union is the benchmark for budget and quality. Currently, it is neither! Once stream-lined, the Union can re-price its retail operations and provide takeaway alcohol.

The Union should deliver exactly what students want. 10 years+ of factions running the Union has delivered little improvement to it’s business model. The AGM went for less than 10min because the Union is so obscure! “Back to the Future” is the only ticket with enough gigawatts to bring the Union out of the 80’s!

FRESH As anyone who our team has talked to on Union Court over the last week will know, Fresh are not short on policies. All of it, however, is brought together by one overarching aim- to make life on campus better for all students. Some of us like to socialise and party on campus. For you, we want to bring back the $10 jug, hold happy hour barbeques, stage more big social events, and give ANU bands more opportunities to playall at the ANU bar. For others, uni is primarily a place to study. For you, we offer a late night coffee cart for when your burning the midnight oil in the 24 hour computer labs, and more power outlets in the union building- so you can find one when you need one.

We all need money, and we all need to eat, so a Westpac ATM for Union Court and more food outlets are an absolute must.

Finally, in a year when ANU has been dogged by more than its fair share of ugly scandals, we will make the Union more accountable, instituting Union AGMs and time sheets for the Chair and Deputy Chair.

GROW Expand food and beverage options We are committed to introducing better food outlets such as Grill’d, Dobinsons and Burmese Curry. We believe in more choice, cheaper prices and later opening hours.

We want to offer a variety of social spaces for students on campus. We will reinvigorate ANU bar with $10 happy hour jugs and establish a wine bar at Café Peppercorn on Thursday-Sunday. Improve your facilities We believe ANU Bar needs a revamp – it should be the social heart of campus! We will provide more seating and a Foxtel Sports Package and engage more students to perform. We will improve outdoor seating and reinvigorate the top level of the Union Building. Rejuvenate the ANU Union Social CommitteeThe current setup is stagnant and underutilised. We will expand the committee to include the ANUSA Social Officer. Additionally, we will collaborate with colleges, clubs and societies to host better events within the Union bringing you more events like Oktoberfest and St. Patrick’s day.

Support clubs, societies and colleges We believe the Union’s profits should funnel back into students. We will reinstate financial support to clubs and societies and provide high quality and competitively priced venues for college, club and society events.

ANUSA elections last year”. When reached for comment, ‘Fresh’ conceded: “Some [Fresh] members have been involved in political clubs on campus.”

Elections for the Board, which uses a system of proportional representation, will most likely see one undergraduate candidate elected from each ticket. Two candidates from the 2011 Stimulate ticket will continue to serve on the board, as well as one Grow candidate. If this is the case, and any Fresh board members vote with Stimulate board members, the casting vote on the Board will come down to whichever ticket succeeds in having their postgraduate candidate elected.

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X X X X

The ANU Union will be holding its AGM this Wednesday at 6pm in the Karmel Room.

Polling for the Union Board elections takes place 10am-6pm Monday 6th August - Thursday 10th August.

TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLICIES TICKET POLI-

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CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES - CANDIDATE PROFILES CANDIDATE PROFILES

TOM BARRINGTON-SMITH

Super well connected in Canberra, with contacts right across the Canberra hospitality industry. Current ANUSA Education Officer and former Gen Rep - Tom knows the lay of the land. He’s confident representing student interests to the ANU, business, media and community organisations.

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JACK GRACIE

Jack is a second year Arts/Law student from Burgmann College. He recognises the ANU Union has the potential to be revitalised as the key meeting place for all students.

He also thinks the Union can be improved by having a range of healthy food options, such as Sumo Salad, available.

OLIVIA KELLY

I am studying the Juris Doctor. Having previously studied at USYD as well as the University of North Carolina, I have a vast range of university experience and ideas I can bring to the Union Board. I’m committed to offering a more inclusive and exciting student life at the ANU.

ANDREW WADE

Andrew is a PhD candidate studying physics. Andrew knows what it’s like to be studying late on campus on a cold night.

That is why he wants to see late night coffee spots on campus, and a coffee card that can be used at all Union outlets.

AIZAZ SYED

I am a third year Commerce/Law student and am the current Treasurer of Burgmann College. I love sports, meeting new people and making the most of university social events. I am passionate about making sure that the Union is listening to the student body and meeting their needs.

NEWS// 5

HACK SEASON 2012

NATT NIKOLIC

Natt offers fresh and innovative ideas to make ANU student life more exciting and accessible. A second year Arts/Law student, Natt has the skills to effectively communicate with people and advocate positive change Completely apolitical, Natt sees Union involvement as an opportunity to enhance students social and economic standing.

ARISHA ARIF

Arisha Arif is a second year Arts/Law student hailing from Canberra. Through her various roles in clubs and societies she has a lot of experience in event management and sponsorship. She also has well-established relationships with a wide variety of local organisations and businesses.

NINA MILLER

I am a third year Arts/Law student from John XXIII College I’m running for union because I believe the Union should improve current facilities and play a bigger part in student’s lives. I believe our ticket has the best policies to ensure that every student is getting the most out of the ANU Union.

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DALLAS PROCTOR

Current President of ANU Students’ Association. Dallas brings extensive management experience, and an array of relationships with senior ANU staff, the student body and community organisations. 4+ years experience in hospitality, including in 5 star hotels, functions and casual dining (including in supervisory/admin roles).

HARRY LAWLESS

Harry is a fresh-faced Sydney boy who loves studying at ANU. He is a first year Arts/Law student currently at Burgmann College. Harry knows that the Union can be the social hub of ANU if it has student prices. That is why he is campaigning to bring back $10 jug.

TOM BRAZIER

I am a fourth year Engineering/Science student. As the President of Griffin Hall and a Science Faculty Representative on ANUSA I am highly experienced at representing ANU students. I am passionate about strengthening ties between the Union and colleges, clubs and societies.

COMMENT// 6 IN THE LAB

Crowdsourcing Science ELEANOR CAMPBELL

Crowd-sourcing is becoming a powerful force. Enlisting hundreds of thousands of people to complete tiny sections of a larger task is so efficient, you might not even know you’re already participating. Every time you fill out a ‘reCAPTCHA’ box to verify that you’re not a spambot, you’re actually helping to digitise books for ever-expanding digital libraries. In just one day, 200 million ‘reCAPTCHA’ boxes are filled out, amounting to over 150,000 hours of work per day.

Whenever you’re asked to type the squiggly words ‘basilisk dissuade’ before you can download a document or tell someone on the internet that they’re wrong, you’re completing a fragment of a huge puzzle.

The awesome might of crowd-sourcing has found its way into the world of science in the form of a game called Foldit.

Foldit was developed in 2008 after David Baker, a protein research scientist at the University of Washington, realised that humans are, in fact, better at spotting complex and creative solutions to scientific problems than computers are.

A recurring problem in the world of protein engineering is identifying the best possible structure for protein molecules to fold into. In order to better understand the inner workings of organisms on a molecular level (and learn more about illnesses and their treatments) researchers need to be able to visualise the correct folding patterns of long and complex protein molecules. Sometimes computer modelling alone cannot determine the most efficient folding pattern of a protein.

Baker’s plan was simple; to develop a puzzle game that could be downloaded for free, feed current protein structure problems into the game, and watch as hundreds of thousands of players came up with unique and creative solutions. The Foldit game presents

ELEANOR CAMPBELL

players with a section of a protein molecule that computer modelling has been unable to arrange into the optimum orientation.

Players are given instructions to rotate and bend different parts of the protein section to match certain criteria, and then can submit their attempts. These attempts are collated and compared by protein researchers, and the best possible structures are further investigated.

This isn’t just a little puzzle game designed to help students procrastinate; real scientific results have been reached using Foldit players’ suggestions. Most recently, a computer model of an enzyme capable of aiding in a Diels Alder reaction (a common chemical step in the synthesis of various compounds) has been completed thanks to the input of Foldit players. Players who are particularly active or advanced have even been named

in published papers as contributors to the research. By approaching the protein-folding problem with an accessible and fun format, scientists have harnessed the power of hundreds of thousands of human minds to tackle big problems, one small step at a time.

If you’d like to join the effort to complete protein structures or just learn more about crowd-sourced research, visit www.fold.it

COMMENT//7

The Superhero Complex

Illustration // Daniel Kim

Why so much love for a man in a mask, asks Pico Pal It takes a finely tuned mind to detect a pattern emerging in recent cinema. Actually, it’s more like a barrage– a barrage of fit men in spandex: the superhero flick. Super saviours in the past decade have come in all shapes and sizes. There are those born of scientific endeavour like the Incredible Hulk, the Amazing Spiderman or Captain America, each made more formidable by their title.

Then there are the billionaire playboys born to rescue, like Ironman and Batman. Sometimes they band together and call themselves The Avengers. We even get behind the likes of Superman and Thor who are, let’s face it, aliens from outer space. In the wake of the highly anticipated Dark Knight Rises and the mass shooting by a guy calling himself the Joker, one question should be asked: what keeps us returning to see a superhero save the world from a dastardly villain, day after day?

There are easy answers which don’t really address the issue. Perhaps it’s escapism; or the joy of seeing the outsider overcome his social awkwardness (Spiderman, Captain America), or the moral burdens of having too much money (Ironman). But all movies

are a form of escapism– so why this particular form of escape? The basic formula for a superhero flick remains the same.

Hero with a flaw, villain with a plan, villain threatens hero and all hero holds dear, hero overcomes both flaw and villain to save the day.

There has to be a greater pull, something more subtle which seduces us. Does going through an economic downturn fuel us with a need for fantasy? But Toby Maguire’s Spiderman, Eric Bana’s Hulk, and Brandon Routh’s Superman predate that nasty recession business.

The answer rests somewhere in our zeitgeist – the word that’s fun to say and impossible to define. Perhaps as a society, we are a damsel in distress, in a state of constant

peril, waiting to be rescued; and the film superhero is the only one who answers the call.

Repeatedly. A sorry picture, certainly, but take a look around and breathe in the war, terrorism, famine and climate change. All are problems of such magnitude that it’s easier to abandon the cause before you begin to solve them. In all this gloom, the superhero appeal is obvious.

Give him two hours and the man in the mask always prevails. . Unfortunately, this doesn’t translate to life off screen. Yet, the more technology progresses, the more we expect instant solutions. Don’t know the song playing, when the bus is arriving, the Olympics schedule?

There’s an app for that. When this ease doesn’t transfer to political problems, we are left blinking and bewildered, disappointed and depressed. The superhero, on the other hand, does not disappoint. He unequivocally defeats the bad guy. More the point, the bad guy is unequivocally bad, and the hero irre-

Perhaps as a society we are a damsel in distress, in a state of constant peril waiting to be rescued; and the superhero is the only one who answers the call.

pressibly good. Back in the real world, wars are riddled with more than fifty shades of grey, and even heroes can’t be safely idolised.

Lincoln gave speeches supporting slavery; Gandhi outsourced violence to his followers; Obama failed his first term.

As it happens, the trajectory of the world’s love affair with Obama, goes a long way to explain the superhero complex. Although adulation for Obama is not limited to the US, it is safe to say Americans idolise presidential families in the way monarchies are adored by their subjects. Yet a lot of that idolatry has soured when– surprise– Obama hasn’t been able to single-handedly pass all the reform he promised. It’s a side effect of living in a democracy, not an autocracy. We have a tendency to throw all our hopes in the arm of one (super)man, one international convention, one law, one solution.

The only world where that tendency is realistic is where men fly and come in the colour green. That should tell you something about the reasonableness of such an expectation– and why so many of us will go to see the new Superman.

COMMENT// 8

COMMENT//9

Death of an Iconoclast

DONG HYUN SUH

It’s hard to succinctly describe Gore Vidal, who died on the 31st July aged 86, due to the sheer breadth and consistent quality of his works. He displayed an acid-tongued wit and intellectual clout in his prodigious output as a novelist, essayist, playwright, screenwriter, political activist, polemicist and perhaps most importantly as a self-promoting, iconoclastic public intellectual.

His output as a writer and public figure even outshine his fascinating biography, which can be perused by anyone with access to Wikipedia. He was Christopher Hitchens before there was a Christopher Hitchens. Indeed, the two were good friends, with Vidal even anointing Hitchens (who coincidentally died before Vidal in December 2011) as his successor and heir before they fell out. Vidal blazed a trail which Hitchens and his ilk are still following today. He was openly bisexual, and boasted that he had sex with over a thousand men and women in his memoirs.

It was his sexual openness which lead to one of his greatest literary and cultural achievements. His novel The City and the Pillar outraged conservative critics and the literary establishment when it was released in 1948 due to its subversive and pioneering depiction of unambiguous homosexuality. Vidal suffered professional repercussions for the novel but in the end history vindicated him.

The novel claimed its place as a work of historical cultural significance and he emerged as one of America’s foremost literary figures.

Vidal’s willingness to provoke and attack orthodoxy combined with his literary talent and caustic wit lead to some eloquent and powerful “fuck yous”. Vidal’s own fervent,

almost narcissistic, belief in his creative, intellectual and moral superiority gave him the impetus to attack figures such as Truman Capote, Ernest Hemingway and the Kennedys. However, the most famous target of his acerbic rage and poisoned-pen was the United States. He took a very dim view of its aggressive foreign policy agenda and its quasi-democratic two party system. He was a constant thorn in the side of the second Bush administration, lobbing literary grenades while advocating for the impeachment of its President for war crimes. Vidal also famously proclaimed that the United States was rotting away and would end up subservient to China.

Although he is acclaimed for his daring intellectual and creative exploits, Vidal had a definite crazy streak that could not be dismissed as a product of the ageing process.

His penchant for conspiracy stretched back to the Pearl Harbor attacks: he claimed President Roosevelt had advance knowledge and even hoped for an attack by the Japanese.

He later stirred up controversy by accusing the United States government of passively facilitating the 9/11 attacks despite knowing they would happen. Clearly his intellect was not infallible and his unshakable faith in his own intellectual fortitude was a weakness as much as a strength.

Even if Vidal, the enfant terrible of 20th century American literature and public political discourse, was shamelessly vain and by all accounts personally unpleasant, the world is a poorer place for having lost a man of both great talent and conviction as well as a potent public voice for political dissent.

Each edition, the best letter to the editor will win a kilo of roasted ground coffee from Two Before Ten. Send letters to contact@woroni.com.au In the latest issue of Woroni (No.8 Vol 64, July 23), Belle Joseph recounts for us, in a letter to the editor, a “Tale of Two Women’” in response to a previous letter written anonymously by a woman recounting her experience of abortion.

Ms. Joseph tells us “I don’t want to enter into an academic argument on her statements”. This is because Belle had decided to use the much more useful and colourful anti-choice tactic of doublespeak and emotional manipulation. Ms. Joseph sets up the stories of two women, who have both discovered they are pregnant. The first is surrounded by happy and supportive friends and family and thus goes on to have a blissful, baby filled existence. The second woman, meanwhile, only tells three people about her pregnancy, the boyfriend might not be around, and she is worried about balancing motherhood with her studies or work commitments. The second woman gets an abortion, and according to Ms. Joseph, “there is no justice, no compassion and certainly no real choice in this second scenario.”

Ms. Joseph first bemoans the failure of the second woman’s family and friends to support her and purports this as the one of the reasons why thousands of women in Australia every year choose to have an abortion. Ms. Joseph characterises a specific kind of support given often given by a friend or confidant in this situation – “you do whatever you feel is right” – as abandonment rather than respect for a friends agency over their own life. This is not the “true support and love” to show to your pregnant friend, according to Ms. Joseph.

Instead, apparently, we should be asking “How can I help you so you can go ahead and have your baby?” (in other words, “I can only offer my help if you adhere to my anti-choice agenda”) or, my personal favourite: “You might regret some things about your life after having a baby, but you will never regret not having an abortion.”

She finishes off her anti-choice tale with a rose-tinted vision of the choice to be a single mother, reflected through the experience of Australian celebrity Marcia Hines.

Perhaps if we all looked to the shining example of Marcia Hines and her extraordinarily supportive mother, as Ms Joseph

suggests, then maybe we can construct a society in which “…every woman will be able to welcome her baby into the world, secure in the knowledge that she isn’t alone”.

The thing that frustrates me most about Ms. Joseph’s anti-choice arguments (and those of others who follow a similar vein), is her attempt to oversimplify and overtly sentimentalise a woman’s decision to have an abortion. Ms. Joseph tells us the tale of two women, but what does she have to say about the third woman? The woman who has decided that, at 18, she is not ready to either carry or support a child? Or the fourth woman, who does not want to have children at all? Or the fifth woman, whose rapist did not use a condom, and her Catholic-run-yet-government-funded hospital did not provide her with emergency contraception when treating her?

Or the sixth woman, who, after falling pregnant, discovered that carrying the foetus to term would be severely detrimental to her basic health and well-being?

I don’t really wish for Belle Joseph to provide an answer for these women. Not just because her point of view forgets and obscures the women who do not fall into her falsely heteronormative, dichotomous, able-bodied, and two-dimensional categories. I ask for no answer from Belle Joseph on the choices made by other women because it is none of her business. Her opinion on a woman’s decision to exercise her right to bodily autonomy is not relevant or necessary to the first, second, third, fourth fifth, sixth, or any, woman. Ms. Joseph may dream of a world where every woman is pressured, (appropriately, of course!) by her family and friends to have a child. But I dream of a world where every child was brought into it as a choice.

Renee ‘Moretti’ Jones is the ANUSA Women’s Officer for 2012 and is usually keen to enter into an academic (or non academic) argument on reproductive rights. If Belle Joseph ever wanted to engage in such an argument whether it be from a philosophical, economical, statistical, human rights, political or even biblical standpoint she can email Renee at sa.womens@anu. edu.au

Want your work to be seen, read or head by thousands across campus?

Deadline for submissions is Friday 10th August!

Art, opinion, writing all welcome.

contact@woroni.com.au

COMMENT// 10 ON THE HILL

I Got 99 Sponsors But An Olympics Ain’t One

David Kinyua explains why the ‘spirit’ of the Games smells a little like napalm

As you sit at home enjoying your very biased Australian coverage of the Olympics from the free-to-air channels, perhaps you may be tempted to think that it’s Australia versus the World. But not to worry, after all it’s free to watch and we watch what we care about, right? As you sit back and enjoy the games, I thought I’d take a few lines to reflect on a few realities that you are surely not going to see on TV. Being an economist-in-training, it is natural JOSH DABELSTIEN to start with numbers. When London won On 30th July, Mal Brough, former Howard the bid in 2005, they estimated the cost to be Government minister (and apparent adviser $3.5 billion. However, due to low-balling the actual costing and overhyping the benefits, to James Ashby) won preselection for the that cost figure has now ballooned to about seat of Fisher. $18 billion. The sad thing is that 88-98% of Boring. Boring. BORING. this money will be paid directly by taxpayI know you don’t care who represents ers. So who does all this money benefit?

Fisher, you probably don’t really care about Moody’s, the rating agency, suggests that politics either. And why should you, when last week I wrote all about why your elected the benefits of the Olympics will be positive in net but far less than gross visitor numrepresentatives hate you…

But politics can be kind of sexy, at least on bers would suggest. Corporates are said to have the largest benefit from the event and the Sunshine Coast…

Moody’s also point to the huge disruption to And when politicians treat the offices they hold with contempt, it’s important that business that the games will cause.

Besides the obvious irony, I am sceptical of those who are going to be forced to choose between them come election time know the seeing McDonald’s and Coca Cola as major Olympics sponsors, but I won’t dwell on this. manner in which these public representaMore worrying is Dow Chemicals, also an tives conduct themselves in private.

Olympic partner. Dow Chemicals is infaThis week, after years of competition mously responsible for one of the world’s between Peter Slipper and Mal Brough for representation in the seat of Fisher, Brough has been pre-selected by the Coalition to represent them at the next election.

Peter Slipper, who has held the seat since 1993, stood down as Speaker of the House after sexual misconduct allegations (currently still being investigated) were made by his former staffer James Ashby.

Slipper withdrew himself as a member of the Liberal National Party (LNP) before assuming the non-partisan role of Speaker of the House, and the LNP has obviously not forgotten.

In a fashion markedly more resemblant of an episode of Dawnson’s Creek than what we ought to expect from our elected representatives, 33-year-old former staffer James Ashby sought counsel from numerous Coalition MPs in the weeks preceding Slipper’s downfall.

Ashby allegedly colluded with Christopher Pyne, Shadow Minister for Education, Appreticeships, and Training, and Mal Brough.

Is it a coincidence that Mal Brough, the same MP who has spent years trying to replace Slipper as the representative for Fisher, provided counsel to another man who too wants Slipper out of the Speaker’s chair? Or did they just meet on the bus home…

If Ashby had been the victim of sexual misconduct, it shouldn’t matter who it was who helped him to come forward. Unless of course if it came about that that encouragement was not from one friend to another, but perhaps was a down-low character assassination carried out by the Party’s senior rankers.

Brough and Pyne tread a fine line between slander-feeding and Ashby’s counsellors.

Does Ashby usually call Brough and Pyne when he has things he wants to get off his chest?

Private corruption in a very public office

worst-ever industrial catastrophes, the 1984 the Bhopal gas disaster. However, they still refuse to add to the $470 million that was paid out in 1989 as compensation. It is also

ity and pollution in Mongolia or even Utah is not at all reputable and there is also an organised protest against this at the games.

The great Alexander Cockburn once wrote, “these special rules and laws sit around the grass like snakes, and at the opportune moment they pop their heads out and bite the ankles of activists.” Olympic time means that the police need reinforcement and this is very much present in these games.

Without disparaging the need for security at the games, it is hard for the police to draw the line between security and militarisation. Is the largest security operation since World War II justified? When the Mayor was asked about the heavy military personnel his answer was, “I think most people in this country don’t have any objection at all to seeing venues being properly invigilated by common knowledge that Dow has since professional military armed services people.” bought Union Carbide which was responsi- A final observation is that florists have been ble for production of napalm that was used banned from displaying their flowers in the in the Vietnam War. Protesters have set up a Olympic symbolic circles since 2006. The “special Olympics” with children from ages 5 florists could pay a £20,000 fine if they were to 16 acting disabled. Now I promise you are caught doing this “illegal ambush marketnot to see that on your TV despite it being ing”. Ambushing who? something everyone should be made aware So when you next turn on the TV to enjoy of. some Aussie champ, think about of what is Also, it is never Australian enough without actually happening beyond those stadiums Rio Tinto in the mix somewhere. Rio Tinto and courts as the cameras zoom fast past has been contracted to make the Olympic East London. I hope you enjoy actively and medals for these games. Their mining activ- critically.

“these special rules and laws sit around the grass like snakes, and at the opportune moment they pop their heads out and bite the ankles of activists.”

Illustration // Hannah Winter-Dewhirst

COMMENT//11

Come At Me, Bro There’s a fine line between rough and tumble sibling rivalry and abuse, explains Meg Wootten

Last month I received the first text message I had ever gotten from my 23-year-old brother: “happy birthday meg have a good day.” Very brief, no punctuation, no smiley faces and certainly no xoxo. It was the best thing that has ever happened to me.

In other sibling relationships, such a message might have been typical or even expected, but the last nice thing my older brother had done for me was almost ten years earlier when I was nine: he let me sit next to him and watch silently as he played Grand Theft Auto on the Playstation. The next eight or nine years of my life were characterised by a consistent pattern of emotional and physical abuse. Hitting, kicking, verbal threats, having things thrown at me and being locked out of our house for hours were not uncommon occurrences. I remember as a child and teenager observing the sibling relationships of my friends with envy and sadness: while they teased each other and had arguments every so often, they also joked and played games. For me the concept of smiling around my brother was completely alien.

I came to recognise that the relationship between my brother and I was not healthy but abusive. While some degree of rivalry and conflict is normal and even beneficial in sibling relationships, it is when the balance between positive and negative interactions is upset that abuse can occur. Sibling abuse can

be described as a repeated and consistent pattern of negative behaviour towards one sibling by another with the intent to inflict harm and to attain a degree of power over the other sibling.

Due to chronic under-reporting of sibling abuse, gauging its prevalence in the community is difficult. However, several studies indicate that sibling abuse (whether psychological, physical and sexual) is the most common form of domestic abuse, occurring to some degree in as many as half of all sibling relationships. However, while child abuse, spousal abuse and elder abuse have become understood and recognised, sibling abuse lags behind significantly in awareness. This is very concerning because the long-term consequences are as serious and damaging as other forms of abuse: depression, anxiety, suicide, drug and alcohol problems, low self-esteem and problems in interpersonal relationships.

The lack of reporting, research and social awareness regarding sibling abuse seems to stem from the difficulty parents, schools, mental health professionals and the wider community have in separating normal sibling conflict from outright abuse. In our society parents, teachers, professionals and even children themselves have come to expect a certain amount of conflict between siblings, which increases the risk of abusive behaviour flying under the radar.

I did not open up about my experience of abuse until my late teens for fear of not being taken seriously, but by this time I was already in the depths of depression. The process of opening up about any form of abuse is difficult, and is made even more so when the subject is surrounded by a cloud of stigma and misunderstanding. Fortunately, once I did begin speaking about it, I was lucky enough to have access to access to somebody who listened, cared, and led me on the right to track to recovery.

While I am now living far away from my brother, I still feel the effects of the abuse.

I remember observing the sibling relationships of my friends with envy and sadness: while they teased each other and had arguments, they also joked and played games. For me the concept of smiling around my brother was completely alien.

For me, and probably for many other survivors of abuse, the task of reconciling the devastation of abuse with the fact that your abuser is member of your family is an incredibly difficult one - this is somebody who is supposed to love, cherish and take care of you. This abuse has made me reconsider what family means and what love is - it is a strange situation when you would never hug your brother but you would donate your organs to him in a heartbeat.

It is clear from the disparity between the incidence of sibling abuse and the amount of attention it receives that we need to start thinking about sibling relationships in a different way. I admit that I had reservations about attaching my name to this article for fear of judgement and stigma; but then the titles of papers I have read about sibling abuse, The Forgotten Abuse and The Last Taboo, came to mind. I know that one article in a student newspaper can’t ever effect the kind of widespread change that is needed, but I have shared my own experiences in the hope of raising awareness and stimulating conversation about sibling abuse. If there is anything I have learnt, it is the power of communication – and that one message can go a very long way.

The ANU offers a free and confidential counselling service to all current ANU students and staff: counselling.anu.edu.au

12

Homosexuality in Indonesia

Jason Clarke finds out about the hurdles facing young, gay Indonesians as they confront a culture of silence

It’s hard to imagine being born gay in Indonesia. Living in big cities like Jakarta and Yogyakarta would be unimaginably hard compared to Australia, let alone living in the little Christian town of Salatiga in Central Java (population approx. 100,000).

Life here is still very religiously and family orientated. Despite the grand shopping centre in the middle of town, the numerous banks with glittering signs out the front advertising home loans and high interest accounts, and dazzling karaoke bars, people are still very relaxed, running on ‘indotime’. The churches are big buildings, and the mosques can be heard from anywhere in the town five times a day for Namaz. People live with their parents until married (unless they’re rich enough to study in a different town) and under government policy, everyone has a stated religion. Compared to other parts of Indonesia everyone, regardless of denomination, gets along very well here, despite the religious conservatism. Muslims attend the Christian university and vice-versa, for example.

After some research on Facebook , it became apparent that, despite the enormous taboo, there is a secret community of gays in Salatiga. After managing to join this totally private group, of which the majority of profiles are used only for the purposes of the group (many people having a ‘public’ and a ‘gay’ profile), a couple of guys agreed to meet to have coffee and a chat. Talking with them was very eye-opening. One was originally from outside of Jakarta, and is now in Salatiga studying Nuclear Science. He is Catholic and

has several crucifixes and rosaries on the wall of his small studio apartment in the suburbs of Salatiga. The other was Muslim, but said he rarely goes to a mosque or prays and that his family were not overly religious. He’s a graduate in Japanese studies at the local Christian university, had studied in Japan and now worked in a local bank.

It became pretty evident early in the conversation that these guys led very different lives to gays in Australia.

Firstly, neither of their families knew – this didn’t come as much of a shock. Secondly none of their friends knew – this wasn’t much of a shock either. With this statement came the question, ”so how did you two meet ?.” They had met on the said Facebook group and become friends through it. The only other gays that either of them had ever met had been through this group (which has over 100 members). They both planned to marry women and have two children, which is the norm in Indonesia. However, what was most interesting and shocking was the story of the Catholic student.

When asked whether sex was a part of the community in Salatiga, the answer was yes.

The Muslim student explained that he had done it and some other gays in Salatiga do too.

But, he explained, his Catholic friend hadn’t.

His friend was going through a program at the local church, run by the priest and attended by around 6 other men, to ‘cure’ his homosexuality. Now this came as a shock. His story and the things he said were depressing ; he spoke about how if he didn’t ‘cure’ himself, he couldn’t be ‘normal’.

Apparently he never had sex due to the fact that if he did, he would ‘damage his soul’. Having sex was, according to the priest, the worst thing he could do on his road to recovery.

When it was implied that it wasn’t possible to change one’s sexuality, the student partially agreed, but followed up with, ”but oh well, I have to, I just have to.”

It is well known in the West that these programs can be incredibly detrimental to a person. They can cause suicides and deep psychological problems. Funnily enough, when

The Muslim student explained that sex was a part of the gay community in Salatiga. But his Catholic friend hadn’t. His friend was going through a program at the local church, run by the priest and attended by around 6 other men, to ‘cure’ his homosexuality.

this was brought up both students agreed, but the Catholic student had decided it was worth the risk. This is astoundingly ironic as he is in his second year of a Bachelor of Psychology at the university.

When the lives of these men is contrasted with those of gay men in Australia, the difference is obviously astounding. In Australia (for the most part) being gay isn’t viewed as a sickness (in Indonesian the word for gay/ straight is ‘orang sakit/sehat’ – literally ‘people who are sick/healthy’). There are open communities, support, sexual health assistance, anti-discrimination legislation and a large marriage equality campaign soon to achieve its goals. In Indonesia, the government doesn’t acknowledge the existence of homosexuality and brands it as a ‘Western fad’ (not to mention provinces where sharia law is imposed by local governments and it is illegal for locals to be gay). There is zero support and coming out to friends and family is impossible. There is no sexual health support (apart from some very small, privately funded NGOs in Jakarta and large cities), and the concept same-sex marriage doesn’t even mean anything to most Indonesians, it isn’t a thing .

If it weren’t for the Facebook group , these two men would have no form of support, little knowledge, likely not a single friend in a similar situation, and one can only imagine, no hope.

Thank God for progress and secularity in Australia.

13

Coveting Thy Neighbour’s Oxen

Brendan Forde thinks there are serious questions about Tony Abbott’s ability to achieve the goals of Australian foreign policy.

Alan Renouf, former Secretary of the Department of Foreign Affairs, once wrote that the success of Australian foreign policy rested on two great objectives: the preservation of national security (and through that, national sovereignty) and the advancement of the wellbeing of the Australian people. The achievement of these two objects, Renouf wrote, is the goal of Australian foreign policy.

Essentially any effective foreign policy will secure Australia’s interests while not alienating neighbours and partners. The successful execution of such a commonsense proposition relies on the ability and priorities of those making foreign policy.

Recent comments made by the Leader of the Opposition, Tony Abbott, raise important questions as to his ability to achieve the goals of Australian foreign policy. Abbott’s recent forays into foreign affairs raises concerns about the importance he places on the relationships with Australia’s most important regional partners; China and Indonesia.

Comments that have been made regarding important bilateral and multilateral issues involving Australia’s interests require clarification; Coalition policy seems certain to propel Australia into a prolonged dispute with Indonesia, while comments made regarding China appear to abandon the long held positions of successive Australian governments of both major political parties.

In his 2009 manifesto Battlelines Abbott barely mentioned the rise of China and the attendant changes for Australia’s foreign policy. When he did turn his attention to matters of foreign affairs Abbott’s contribution was shocking for its dismissive brevity: “Although China is likely to become even stronger in

the years ahead, this may not mean much change for Australia’s relationships and foreign policy priorities.” The statement is extraordinary; the rise of China has completely altered the regional balance. This has been an observed phenomenon for some time. To not acknowledge this is either careless or deliberate; either way it is a worrying portent.

While on a recent visit to Beijing Abbott made some statements about China. Apart from comments on Chinese investment in Australia (which revealed more about splits in Coalition policy than anything else), Abbott weighed into the current territorial dispute in the South China Sea. The dispute is a tense and complex one with China asserting claims over those of the competing ASEAN states of Vietnam, Malaysia and the Philippines. Australia has long held a policy of asserting a position of neutrality in territorial disputes.

This, along with a complimentary policy of supporting all efforts to resolve such disputes through international law, has enjoyed bipartisan support as it is deemed the only sensible and constructive course of action in such a situation.

Indeed, given that 60percent of Australia’s merchandise trade passes through that body

of water, it is not within Australia’s interests to further exacerbate the tensions by picking a side. But while in Beijing Abbott explicitly expressed support for the claims of the ASEAN member states when he declared that, “No big country is entitled to get its way with smaller countries, just because it can.” Although he followed that up with a commitment to the use of international law to resolve the dispute, the content of his comment was unmistakeable.

The big country is China, the little countries ASEAN members.

Whether Abbott’s comments reflect a shift in Coalition policy, or are simply his own musings is not clear. This is unfortunate. When it comes to relations with a nation such as China clarity of position is an important precondition for stability.

On Australia’s relationship with Indonesia Abbott’s rhetoric has had an unmistakably negative effect. Coalition policy on Indonesia seems to be centred on a single issue: asylum seekers. Looking to maximise the issue with his domestic constituency Abbott has promised to have asylum seeker boats towed back to Indonesia, a move emphatically opposed by the Indonesian government. In an attempt to allay their concerns Abbott has promised that within one week of his election as Prime Minister he will

In his 2009 manifesto Battlelines Abbott barely mentioned the rise of China and the attendant changes for Australia’s foreign policy. To not acknowledge this is either careless or deliberate; either way it is a worrying portent.

travel to Jakarta to explain his policy directly.

Despite such a gesture the Indonesian position is unmovable. Indonesian Foreign Minister Marty Natalegawa is reported to have conveyed a message that such a policy would be unacceptable to the Indonesian government. How Coalition policy would address this significant difference in not clear.

While Abbott has promised he will work to deepen relations with Indonesia, his embrace of domestic partisanship and his promise to turn back the boats is putting at risk Australia’s most important bilateral relationship. Abbott claims he seeks to strengthen relations with Indonesia; such aspirations are incompatible with the promises he has made to the Australian people.

Making foreign policy is not an exact process and requires great ingenuity and flexibility. But as Renouf wrote, the execution of foreign policy must be motivated by Australia’s interests and not domestic politics. By hinting at supporting particular claimants in the South China Sea dispute Abbott has jeopardised Australia’s relations with China, an act which may contribute to the heightening of tensions in that area.

An Abbott-led Coalition government, committed to turning back asylum seeker boats, is bound to have a difficult relationship with the Indonesian government. In this instance Abbott has allowed domestic politics to mitigate Australia’s national interest. Ultimately the Coalition’s approach to foreign affairs is messy, inconsistent and hypocritical.

Greater scrutiny must be applied to their policies in future, to test if they are truly fit to be given responsibility for our national interests.

COMMENT// 14

Of Memes and Trollface The commodification of memes has undermined an Internet culture which used to be subversive and boundary pushing, argues Daniel Rose

The Internet and Facebook are currently awash with image macros purporting to be memes. In this article I invite you to don a pair of rose-tinted glasses and take a journey through the history of the meme to reveal the extent to which current Internet culture has become boring and homogenised.

The term ‘meme’ originates in Richard Dawkins’ The Selfish Gene meaning a concept which spreads throughout culture. Just like a gene, a successful meme is able to spread throughout culture, while unsuccessful ones fade from existence.

An Internet meme is a similar concept, with the most successful being ones which users are more inclined to spread due to their shock value, humour, or other quality.

Some of the first Internet memes originated on USENET, and could be classified as a concept (e.g. Godwin’s Law), or what would now be called “copypasta” -̶ a length of text (e.g. hoaxes or stories).

With faster bandwidth came the opportunity to begin using images as memes, which saw the introduction of “All Your Base” and “O RLY” to the Internet lexicon, along with the accompanying images.

In the mid-2000s, websites such as 4chan and Encyclopaedia Dramatica, which both began to chronicle and gatekeepers of Internet culture. 4chan still exists due to its capac-

ity to monetise its traffic, while Encyclopaedia Dramatica died when it was revealed the website was losing $30k a year on bandwidth costs.

Another factor leading to the downfall of the frequently offensive yet extensive archive on Encyclopaedia Dramatica was the website and associated YouTube channel, Know Your Meme (KYM). KYM was able to democratise and monetise the business of chronicling Internet culture. Previously, Internet culture had its own special language and norms, requiring those new to it to “lurk” - to passively observe culture until they understood.

It is websites like KYM and 9GAG which I argue have undermined Internet culture by taking its sharp edges off, making it accessible to anyone with the Internet and channelling focus into memes which are instantly understandable

like image macros – images with text superimposed.

Early Internet culture was autonomous and subversive, pushing and quite often over-stepping the boundary of what is considered socially acceptable. What bound it together was a collective disdain for the mass and popular, while desperately clinging to its Byzantine norms.

KYM and 9GAG on the other hand, lowered the barrier for entry into the Internet world, and have cultivated a fanbase so large and diverse that the most popular memes are the ones which have broad appeal – the inoffensive, the politically neutral, and self-explanatory. These websites’ success can be attributed solely to their ability to commercialise the Internet’s collective intellectual property.

If I could point to one meme which blew open the world of Internet culture, it would be the horrendous “Advice Dog” series. The

Websites like Know Your Memes and 9GAG have undermined Internet culture by taking its sharp edges off, making it accessible to anyone with the Internet and channelling focus into uncreative memes…

To publish your own is now to piss in an ocean of piss.

meme is essentially an image macro, with the head of a dog set on a rainbow spiral background, featuring text giving “advice”. This meme spawned child memes of the same design like “Courage Wolf ” and “Socially Awkward Penguin”.

With this meme came websites dedicated to assisting users generate their own “X Animal” memes. Of course, such websites had existed in the past for demotivationals, and now they exist for any punter wanting to inset bold-stroked, Impact-font text on any photo.

What these recent developments mean is the goalposts for what makes an Internet meme shifted; from a popular idea transmitted across the Internet, to any image macro.

The digital revolution is well upon us, and as promised, we can all be publishers. It should be disputed if this is a good thing because the Internet is now awash with unfunny and uncreative “memes”. To publish your own, to borrow a phrase from 4chan, is now to piss in an ocean of piss.

This criticism comes from somebody who considers themselves a member of the Internet Old Guard, and the nostalgia for “how it was” still runs strong. Consuming Internet memes used to require a special commitment to the art, and one can’t help but lament the death of a very special and unique moment in history.

Art & Culture

15

Nancye Marrington Illustrations 2012 http://nancyemarrington.tumblr.com/

LIFE & STYLE// 16

WORONI COMMUNITY NOTICEBOARD VOLUNTEER FOR THE HEART FOUNDATION’S DOORKNOCK APPEAL WHERE: Register Online http://www. heartfoundation.org.au/doorknock or call the Doorknock team on 1800 55 22 55 (business hours).

They are recruiting volunteers for the 2012 Doorknock Appeal in ACT and need your help! If you can spare a few hours during September, then consider joining the Doorknock Appeal and assist with this year’s collection by visiting homes in your local area. Alternatively, you can email your details to (name, address and phone number) at doorknock@heartfoundation. org.au .

INNOVATIONACT BUSINESS INNOVATION PRIZES WHEN: Registration closes Sunday 19th August WHERE: Visit their website www.innovationact.org for information.

InnovationACT gives participants opportunity to develop innovative ideas into business plans and compete for a generous prize pool of $60,000. Registration closes on 19th August so come along to future events to find some like-minded people to form a team.

ANIME.AU.12 CONVENTION

ANU FILM GROUP DIVERSITY WEEK WHEN: August 6th – 11th WHERE: Coombs Theatre In celebration of diversity in film, ANU Film group are hosting a week-long screening of a selection of international films. The 8 screenings are open to everyone and completely free.

Contact info@anufg.org.au or phone: 6247 2425 for full program details and screening times.

WHEN: Saturday 11th August, 9am-5pm.

WHERE: Manning Clarke Centre Tickets: $15 p/p, $10 for children u16, $30 for family (2 adults and 2 children). Tickets are available online at http://anuas.org/animeau12/ The ANU Anime Society will be hosting Anime.AU.12; an anime, manga and gaming convention. A variety of events will be on offer, including a cosplay competition, games, art competitions, anime screenings, trivia quiz, auction, dance workshop, a talent quest and much more. Japanese anime will be shown in three screenings.

For more info contact ANU Anime President Sue Francis at 0407 891 995 or at anuanimesociety@gmail.com

ANU “VOICE” POETRY SLAM WHEN: Wednesday 22nd August, 6:00pm WHERE: Theatre 3 If you can recite, rap, sing, monologue, whisper, shout, freestyle, read then consider performing in ANU’s final Voice Poetry slam.

You get three minutes to perform on a topic of your choice, providing it’s your own original work. Alternatively, head along to watch others get creative.

Contact Simone (simone.stclair@anu.edu.au) or Will (will.small.20@gmail.com) for details.

Francis at 0407 891 995 or at anuanimesociety@gmail.com.

ANU UNDERGRAD RESEARCH JOURNAL CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS The ANU AURJ is an interdisciplinary journal which offers outstanding undergraduate students and recent honours graduates a unique opportunity to showcase their work to the wider academic community. Submissions are welcome from all fields of study, including theses extracts, reports from research projects (including group research projects), major essays as well as any self-directed research completed while studying at ANU. DEADLINE for papers is 20th August. For more info, contact: aurj@anu.edu.au.

Got something you want to tell people about? get your event on OUR noticeboard by sending a short spiel to contact@woroni.com.au

LIFE & STYLE// 17

Jinja Safari : The Interview BEN LATHAM

“At the moment we’re working on an album. It’s being worked on furiously and we’re all super excited about it. It’s absolutely massive for us. We’re right in the thick of it at the moment but I certainly don’t look that busy!”

Joe laughs, “Right now I’m on the roof at home in the sunshine.”

Joe ‘Citizen’ Stranger is the bass player of the impossibly charming, Sydney-based indie folk outfit known as Jinja Safari. The album in question is the band’s upcoming debut fulllength release, building on the popularity and sound of their two critically acclaimed EPs; Jinja Safari and Mermaids & Other Sirens.

“The sound is definitely moving, as it always should be. The music is still coming from the same place and the same people, but we’re a band full of five guys who… listen to a huge variety of music ourselves and there is a lot of that coming out in our new stuff. You don’t want to do the same thing for too long but I think that the fans of the old stuff will still be pleased!”

Most beautifully striking in Jinja Safari’s musical world are the lush, vibrant landscapes of sound, fused by an awe-inspiring web of instruments both familiar and foreign.

“Why the hell wouldn’t you want to muck around with loads of different instruments?

There’s so much out there. It’s something that once you delve into, it opens up a huge world of opportunity and creative inspiration.”

It is an ongoing exploration of instrumentation that has practically become the band’s trademark, and this can be heard none better than on their cover of R. Kelly’s “Ignition” for Triple J’s Like A Version, performed on sitar, harmonium, and numerous other instruments. “We were rattling through a lot of different songs and throwing around a lot of different ideas but nothing was standing out. And at the point of having that dead end feeling, with no more ideas, no more sugges-

PRU DAVIE

tions, being creatively naked so to speak, R. Kelly rose up out of the nothingness. This is a song about partying! We really wanted to do it justice and find another reason for people to lose their minds come the ‘freakin weekend’.”

The band themselves describe their music as “forest rock”, aptly depicting the freedom and adventure inherent to their songs, but all labels stamped upon them fall flat in comparison to the worldly experiences that form the basis of their inspiration. “Our musical influ-

And at the point of having that dead end feeling, with no more ideas, no more suggestions, being creatively naked so to speak, R. Kelly rose up out of the nothingness.

This is a song about partying! ences are just all over the place. Most of the influences don’t come from other musicians as they do from other areas of life. Travelling is probably the biggest creative influence you can have. Marcus and Pepa each did their own colossal trip overseas before punching out a lot of the songs. Marcus visited his grandmother in Uganda and Pepa trekked throughout India and they came back with a lot of inspiration. We also do a lot of our own travelling around Australia. We all came back together with a lot of fresh ideas.”

The most recent of the band’s escapades

includes a performance at The Great Escape festival in Brighton, UK, as much an indication of Jinja Safari’s rising success overseas as the band’s constant desire for travel and adventure. “We did our first trip as a band over to the UK and America in May. It was an experience of a lifetime. …. Half the time we didn’t know what we were doing there or why anyone should really be there listening to us.”

But throughout August, Jinja Safari will be back on more familiar shores, travelling around Australia on The Blind Date Tour with fellow indie rockers White Arrows (USA) and Opossom (NZ). “We’re hugely excited, as we should be, playing with those two bands. We’d never met any of these guys before planning to tour with them [and] when it came time to tour it seemed ridiculous to get two other bands of such great, great quality and incredible in their own way. To get both of them on the same tour seems ridiculous but we shot for it and it’s worked out. Most of us haven’t met, so the ‘blind date’ name of the tour is a bit of a play on that idea.”

But unlike most blind dates, for Stranger, it’s love even before first sight as he gushes over the mere thought of collaborating onstage with the likes of White Arrows and Opossom: “We’d love to! Since listening more and more to Opossum and some of the cool sounds he’s punching out, and then going to work on some of our new songs that are taking shape before the tour, I keep having little fantasies about asking Kody to step up with his synths and add in little bits here and there. …No plans as of yet but the incentive is definitely there.”

Jinja Safari and The Blind Date Tour will be stopping by Canberra on August 15th at our very own ANU Bar, thrilled as always at the idea of more adventures and newfound experiences. “Canberra’s the major city we’ve made our way over to the least amount of times so we’re extremely excited. It’s always a treat.”

Interhall Arts Wrap Up

In 2012, the competition for the Inter-Hall Arts Shield has been fierce. The year started with arguably the shield’s most exciting event: chess, hosted by a gracious Johns. From the beginning of the competition, it was clear that Fenner was unbeatable, and so to the victor went the spoils.

Every college was prepared to claw their way back into the race in the year’s second event, trivia. Griffin Hall both organised and won this event, with a spectacular effort from

all other colleges.

After a much-needed semester break, the beginning of term two saw the biggest, brightest and best event of the year. Henry Ladd, Monique Langley-Freeman and Kate Reardon are to thank for the phenomenal night at Bruce Hall, with extended courtesy to Bruce Hall for allowing us to stamp on their grounds for yet another year. In a close and entertaining race, Burgmann was the night’s winner.

Debating came next, organized by UniL-

odge, featuring a series of intellectual battles rivaling the war between Edison and Tesla.

With a heated grand final between B&G and Burgmann, Burgmann managed to get across the line.

It has been a hectic year of arts so far, but some of the best events are yet to come! In the next fortnight, look forward to some poetry slamming and inter-hall talent of every variety. Until then, you can’t have a fart without some art. See you at the arts events!

THE SEVEN SEAS

Tankin’ – Slovak Style KIERAN PENDER

As the giant steel behemoth roared down the hillside and plunged through a river, three thoughts rapidly entered my mind: The first was, “I wonder whether my insurance covers this.” Seconds later, “this is possibly the best 12 euros I have ever spent!”And finally, as the mechanical beast rose from the water and charged up the embankment, a simple – “WOOOOOOOOO”.

After a night in the Polish mountain resort town of Zakopane, and en route to Budapest, we stopped in the Slovakian countryside.

And staring back at us was the promised vehicle. A tank. A real, live, working tank.

It may have lacked guns, but this extra space meant twenty or so people could cram in and go for the ride of their lives, through rivers and up hills, narrowly avoiding trees and hurtling down terrifying descents – not the most environmentally friendly way to travel, but seriously amazing fun.

For approximately fifteen minutes, the brute trampled around the hills, covering everyone with mud in the process. More worrying than the dirt, however, was the driver’s continued shouts of “everyone OK?” as we ploughed along.

Were people ever not OK while being driven headlong in rivers, flying down small peaks and jumping over mounds of earth?

The tank “commander”, a local businessman called Jozef, used to haul wood in the region with a similar machine, before deciding to purchase the decommissioned army vehicle. One cannot help but think his new occupation is slightly more enjoyable.

Sadly, after fifteen intensely enjoyable minutes, the tank slid around a corner and the finish line was in sight. A final loop of the surrounding area provided a great photo opportunity for bystanders, but then the beast slowed and the engine ceased its mechanical snarls.

When I get home from Europe, my first tale won’t be of the Colosseum or the Eiffel Tower, of Spanish beaches or Scottish mountains.

No, it will most definitely be about my tank ride in the Slovakian countryside.

LIFE & STYLE// 18

A punch, some pink and a bit of poppy red for the months of winter is a faultless option.

Woroni commends anyone battling the dreary blacks and greys that otherwise dominate this season.

CAMPUS Tom Ford Ready-to-Wear Fall 2012

Armani PrivĂŠ Couture

Calvin Klein Ready-to-Wear Fall 2012

STYLE WINTER TRENDS

S

LIFE & STYLE// 19

Balmain Ready-to-Wear Fall 2012

Louis Vuitton Ready-to-Wear Fall 2012

Derek Lam Ready-to-Wear Fall 2012

From the hill tribes of Chaing Mai to the hipster tribes of inner-north Canberra, prints and patterns are costume de rigeur. Looser, drapey constructions add a new twist to a tried and tested look.

Tastelessly designed in Paint and slapped on inorganic cotton, these slogan touting, pamphlet spruiking monstrosities must be avoided at all costs. Avert eye contact and, for the love of god, don’t let your Grandmother catch you wearing one.

Woroni will be scouting Union Court on Thursdays, 12 - 2

YASMIN MASRI NAKUL LEGHA

REVIEWED// 20

Illy brings it back

Illy talks to Lisa Visentin about success, hiphop and its haters, and his latest album.

Playground’s Got Potential EAT // TAPAS BAR Playground Garema Place MARCEL DELANY

A uniform really only takes you so far. In the case of Playground’s waitresses (who are exclusively female; the men get to sit behind the bar and mix drinks), it’s red pants, the same shade of lipstick and a white top.

It looks good; sexy even. But wearing the costume is only one aspect of playing the part.

The service at Playground was unpractised, with some fairly simple pronunciation errors giving the general impression that the front of house had no idea what the kitchen was on about. Still, Playground is new, and that understanding will only improve. We hope.

The vibe is American and fun. The staff is decked out in the colours of the flag — the guys wear blue pants — and the stools are an attractive mismatch of bright tones.

Exposed brick and sharp floorboards add to the youthful feel of the place. It makes you hanker for a McFlurry. This place wants to march you back to childhood.

Pity, then, that eating the food is more like getting hit in the face by a bucket in the sandpit than being let loose to roam free in the tuckshop.

We started off with some pork crackling and onion rings — good beery food. These little snacks are a great idea and are consistent with the theme, but they were not quite right. The crackling was tooth-chippingly good, but there were a few bits that hadn’t quite turned, producing the occasional piece that was less crunch and more gluggy fat.

But with a bit of chilli salt on top, it was mainly delicious.

The onion rings, too, had great potential to entice me in to many more beers. But they were uneven; some were limpid with oil.

Paper towels would be invaluable as an extra condiment on the tables.

Next came a shared dish of paella with some wine. The paella was fine without being outstanding. The mussels were overcooked and slightly dry. The balance of flavours between the other seafood ingredients, however, was excellent.

Playground almost gets it right, but at times it can be downright sloppy. Something is wrong when the staff consistently can’t understand, let alone pronounce, fairly simple ingredients on the menu, when a winery that should be spelt Dal Zotto is instead rendered Dalz Otto, and when it takes 10 minutes to catch an eye for the bill at the end.

Playground has some good ideas. It just needs some adult supervision.

“It could change over night with the right plan, with little more than a mac book and a mic stand”.

Barely three years ago, Melbourne emcee Illy could only have dreamed that he would be penning rhymes about his whirlwind success, let alone delivering them to sold out shows across the nation. These days he stands alongside the trailblazers of modern Aussie hiphop, the likes of which include The Hilltop Hoods and Bliss n Eso, as one of the most popular hiphop acts in the country.

Already well-established on the local hiphop circuit, Illy first entered the public conscience as a fresh-faced 23 year old. His debut album Long Story Short crashed onto the national music scene in 2009, with his hit single “Pictures” repeatedly riding the nation’s airwaves as hip-hop lovers requested it into high rotation on Triple J. It became Illy’s discovery track, earning him a coveted spot on 2009’s Hottest 100 and scoring him a legion of fans.

Since then, Illy has lyricized his journey from struggling artist to headline act in his hugely successfully follow-up album, The Chase. Despite having scored an ARIA-nomination for an album that echoes the tireless pursuit of a dream in the face of doubters - wickedly sweet icing on the cake of poetic irony - Illy remains charmingly modest when asked if he feels like he’s finally made it: “A little bit. I’ve done quite well but there is still a fair bit left to do and I’ve still got a few goals left on the list yet.”

Bring it Back, Illy’s upcoming third album, represents one of the goals which will be crossed off the list when it is unleashed later this year. Packed full of collaborations with Aussie hiphop royalty, including Pez, Reason, Mantra and Trials, Illy describes it as “passion project”, one which taps into his fundamental hiphop roots. The album’s two

most stereotypically-Illy sounding tracks, the up-tempo and cheeky “Where ya been?” and “Heard it all”, have already been released as singles. But while Illy cautions that the rest of the album “is a little more aggressive and a little more traditional hiphop-sounding than you’d normally hear on an Illy record”, critics are already giving it their discerning nod of approval.

At just 26 years old, it’s tempting to conclude that Illy’s path to success is more “snowball than struggle”, but he stresses that his backstory is that of the quintessential undiscovered artist.

“I’ve done a lot of paying dues. I’ve been doing gigs since I was 17 and the first 150 shows, more even, I wasn’t getting paid, so I definitely wasn’t making a living off it.”

With the first few headlines shows bringing in little more than a “couple of hundreds of bucks, which got split up between myself and M-Phazes (his legendary producer)”, hiphop only began paying Illy’s bills about a year and a half ago.

“Man, it was a long time of not paying the rent through music before that, and now that I’m able to I really appreciate the position that I’m in”.

Where Illy’s pre-success story does deviate from the norm is in his pursuit of his side-project – a law degree. And just how does one go about balancing live shows and textbooks?

“Oh man, it was a struggle at times…there was one week where I had a Friday, Saturday, Sunday run [of shows] and I got a flight home at 2am on Monday morning and sat an exam at 9:30am. It was sheer stubbornness and will that got me through but don’t know if I could do that again”.

In an industry which attracts a lot of haters for its perceived cultivation of obnoxious egos and hyper-arrogance, as well as its de-

meaning representation of women, Illy’s take on the perennial “bitches and hoes” debate comes as a breath of fresh and reasoned air.

“Having a sexist or really misogynist view on women is pretty much ignorant. We’re from a country that doesn’t need that sort of bullshit, and that’s reflected in the way I talk about women…so to turn my back on that so that a few people can think I’m cool, well, I’m just not going to do that”.

With Aussie hiphop undergoing a transformation from an underground, niche genre of music to one which enjoys mainstream listenership, timing has certainly been on Illy’s side.

“There’s definitely some luck involved in it.

People my age got to benefit massively from the scene as it was at the start of the 2000s… so I was definitely of the right age and coming up at the exact right time to have a lot of outlets and a lot of people helping out”.

Serendipitous though the timing has been, there’s no denying Illy’s own contribution to the popularisation of hiphop in Australia.

Like all hiphop artists, he stakes his integrity on the quality of his lyrics and sincerity of his delivery, but it’s his showcase of song writing talent, from pop-infused crowdbouncers to more down-beat introspective tracks, that has produced sold-out shows and delivered a more eclectic audience to the sounds of Aussie hiphop.

Bring it Back sees Illy’s repertoire diversify once again and, with the shows on his upcoming tour already selling out, it seems the fans aren’t too stressed about where he’s been…they’re just pretty damn glad he’s back.

Catch Illy on his Bring It Back tour at Zierholz @ UC on 24th August. Tickets are $28.60 through Oztix.

For the full podcast of Lisa’s interview with Illy, head to www.woroni.com.au

REVIEWED// 21 CANBERRA GIG GUIDE

MARTIN PEREZ-MCVIE

The folks over at blankhet have organised a real treat of a show for the evening of Thursday the 9th of August, with LA’s Mono/ Poly playing a set at Hippo Bar. Signed to Flying Lotus’ illustrious imprint Brainfeeder, Mono/Poly plays an innovative brand of glitchy instrumental hip hop over fascinating astral soundscapes. Supporting are Canberra’s favourite experimentalists Spartak and the lush beats of Onetalk, alongside Ostinato, Rachel Haircut and others. This one’s sure to be a party, but tickets are very limited, so get in quick ($33 on Moshtix)!

Adelaide’s Space Bong return to Canberra on Saturday the 11th, with a show at the Pot Belly Bar in Belconnen. Space Bong play an uncompromising, ear shattering style of sludgy, stoner rock influenced doom metal.

Space Bong are supported by the blast beats and groovy breakdowns of one of Australia’s finest grindcore band’s, The Reverend Jesse Custer, and the fantastically named Fat Guy Wears Mystic Wolf Shirt, with Battle Pope and Canberra Cannons rounding out the bill. Bring $10 for the door and a set of ear plugs for your ears.

Yet another all-ages hardcore show at the Tuggeranong Youth Centre sees Kiwi metalcore band Antagonist AD play alongside the Bay Area’s Lionheart and Western Sydney’s Battle Studies is a reflection of a musician’s Shinto Katana as well as locals Frail and fall from grace, Mayer’s fifth studio album Reigner. Tickets are $23 on Moshtix, doors is a plea for forgiveness. It is a bruised and are at 5.30pm on Wednesday the 15th of battered, black and blue singer-songwriter August. finally taking a long, hard look in the mirror On Friday the 17th of August two elecand being dismayed and disappointed by the tronic artists from Melbourne will be man who is staring back. performing at Trinity Bar in Dickson. Chet What is most prominent throughout Faker’s music seems to transcend genre, the album is the artist’s maturation. After skipping between a modern take on soulmaking a seemingly bizarre move from Los ful 90’s R&B and downtempo electronica Angeles to outback Montanna, at thirty-four with pop hooks thrown into the mix – not years old John Mayer is finally acting his to mention he does a sweet cover of Blackage. A juvenile, rockstar persona has been street’s “No Diggity’” Thrupence will be in traded for the gentle, mellow sounds of folk support with his distinctive blend of ambient and country. Although a jarring change of and chillout tunes. pace from his previous albums, this newSaturday the 18th of August sees Toronto’s found genre, sparse and bare-boned, allows Burning Love grace Bar 32 with what his soul to be laid bare and his heart to be should be one of the better showcases of worn on a scuffed, ragged sleeve. The album underground music this year in Canberra. is cohesive, understated and brutally honest. Boasting an ex-member of hardcore punk Reminiscent of Neil Young and Bob Dylan, heavy-weights Cursed, their sound is probit would provide the perfect soundtrack to a ably best characterised as “stoner-punk”, road trip across the American mid-west. something vaguely reminiscent of a mix With the release of a new album usubetween The Bronx and Annihilation Time ally comes the hope of a worldwide tour, – wailing guitar solos over a driving rhythm but earlier this year Mayer succumbed to a section. Supported by Disavow and the Revrecurring throat infliction that cancelled any erend Jesse Custer, the show starts at 7 and planned performances of the album due to finishes at 9.30 on the dot, so make sure you “another surgery and a very long, chemical- make it early to avoid disappointment. ly-imposed silence”. This fan has his fingers After the Burning Love show you can firmly crossed for the speedy recovery of his stroll around to the other side of the Sydney idol although the future is not all bad; John Building to the Phoenix Pub where you can already has another album in the works, catch Melbourne’s Cat Cat headlining aneager to make the most of his extensive other free Canberra show. Rounding out the time off the road with yet more writing and bill is Melbourne’s dreamy indie pop darlings recording.

Pop Singles and local legend TV Colours.

My Love Affair with John Mayer Ben Latham writes an ode to the soaring heights and devastating lows of his relationship with John Ask me who I am and I’ll hand you a copy

of Room for Squares. Down to every last lyric in each of its thirteen songs, portraying candid introspections and beautifully quirky depictions of the world, John Mayer’s debut album from 2001 pegs me to a tee. It’s an obsession, a downright man-crush on the singer-songwriter that has left friends and family rolling their eyes in its gushing, schoolgirl-esque wake since I welcomed his music into my life with open arms in 2006.

But three years later came the release of Battle Studies. With Continuum preceding it – without a doubt my all-time favourite record – John’s fourth studio album had a lot to live up to. But although initially skeptical of his collaboration with Taylor Swift on “Half of my Heart”, and whole-heartedly disappointed after one play-through, it grew on me after over a month of arduous, repeated listening. And, even as each of its singles flopped and the album itself disappeared into obscurity, I could finally say that I liked it. It was no Continuum or Room for Squares, but I liked it.

When John began making the headlines for his most recent playboy escapades, appearing on the front cover of Woman’s Day instead of Rolling Stone, his career began to decline. The moment John was swallowed by his ever-growing ego, festered by his celebrity-status in the superficial sphere of tabloids and paparazzi, was the moment my fandom faltered.

In 2006, at the height of his powers, he was singing the Grammy award-winning “Waiting on the World to Change” and lighting up

the worldwide stage with the John Mayer Trio. In short, he was an acclaimed singersongwriter-cum-guitar-god-cum-generallyawesome-human-being.

In 2010 he was that douchebag dating Jennifer Aniston, clawing desperately for any attention, good or bad, from the paparazzi spotlight, with the world ashamed by his infamous interview with Playboy; “My dick is kind of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock.” (A former Grand Wizard of the Klu Klux Klan.)

Betrayed and distraught, I lost faith in my musical hero. Countless nights were spent mournfully gorging myself on mounds of ice cream between wrenching, tearful sobs as I lamented the loss of the one true man in my life. My gal pals beseeched me to move on; he just wasn’t worth the tears and the heartbreak.

But like a sign from heaven, and better than a hundred messages left on my answering machine begging to have me back, John Mayer announced an Australian tour.

Amidst a crowd of over 13,000 loyal fans crammed into the Sydney Entertainment Centre, the true-believers cheered and roared in spite of their idol’s bad press. But John might as well have been serenading yours truly from beneath an ivory balcony below a dreamy, romantic, star-studded sky.

Such did I take the only man I have ever truly loved back into my heart; forgiven but on strict probation.

Such was the state of my adoration at the time of the release of Born and Raised. If

REVIEWED// 22 WORONI RADIO SPOTLIGHT Meet the faces behind Woroni Radio or listen in 11am - 3pm every Thursday www.woroniradio.com.au NAME // Brad Harvey DEGREE // Bachelor of Genetics, 1st Year HOMETOWN // Canberra Why did you get involved in Woroni Radio? I’ve had an interest in radio for a while; I was involved in a community radio station in Tuggeranong during high school. When I asked Stephen Kenny and Mitch Kennedy if they’d like to be involved, too, they said yes. We started the show “The Lunchclub”.

Describe your show in 3 words or less.

“Boom, baby, yeah!”

What’s your source of inspiration for your show? We talk about stories in the news, but also about Mitch’s life. Some of our inspiration in the past has come from Men’s Health Magazine.

Want to get involved? Radio is always on the look-out for more presenters, techies, or music DJ’s!

Get in touch: contact@woroni.com.au

Photos // Ross Caldwell

From maturity to mischief WATCH // PLAY God of Carnage Directed by Dylan Van Den Berg and Gill Lugton Written by Yasmina Reza NUTS VINCENT CHIANG

Abounding in brilliant insanity, NUTS’ latest comic venture, God of Carnage, is the most chaotic piece of theatre to have hit the ANU Drama Lab in years, and, simultaneously, one of the most successful.

The play itself, by Yasmina Reza, plays upon a simple premise: what happens when all hell breaks loose amongst a group of seemingly mature adults? This time, two pairs of adults (parents) have come to discuss a fight which has occurred between their children. By the end of the evening, however, they are the ones acting as children themselves, crying, mocking, wrecking destruction across the stage.

In some ways, it is this element of the play – the discrepancy between adult appearance and childlike behaviour – which perhaps loses favour in a student production. We are at an age where immaturity, whilst frowned upon, is still very much expected, as any Thursday night in Civic might reveal; seeing twenty-something year olds break down is not as shocking as would seeing middleaged people do the same. With that said, I was pleasantly surprised to find this was not entirely the case with NUTS’ production, as the four leads all established themselves with a credible air of middle-age in the play’s early moments, the verisimilitude onstage being broken only when it needed to be.

More broadly speaking, the play’s performances in and of themselves were nothing short of spectacular. With only four actors on stage, the stage nevertheless felt bursting at the seams, the idiosyncrasies of the leads all bouncing off one other with power and energy. Emily Clark’s Annette in particular captured the spotlight with the first onstage vomit I have ever encountered, a most dis-

turbingly hilarious moment from the front row in particular. Kudos to the directors for that as well – I could see the little textures of the vomit in detail. Yummy.

Of course, there are other similarly powerful moments throughout the play, not the least in the vividness of the characters’ transformations. Hannah Wood’s Veronica evolves from pleasantly neurotic into outright insane; her partner, an initially mildmannered Michael played by Sean Flynn, begins to show his boisterous colours, him most of all showing the signs of childishness of the fight which has brought the cast here in the first place. Clark’s spotlight also extends far beyond her one crowning moment of chunder: she of all characters perhaps exhibits the most explicit change, as the diplomacy and mild manner of her “wealth manager” persona changes under the magic of alcohol.

Somewhat fittingly, it is actually the partner of Annette, Alan, who requires the least unravelling. Under Patrick Hutchinson’s command, the character is gleeful, a sociopath, seemingly the least concerned with the entire state of affairs, immersed instead in his mobile phone and the occurrences of the legal world. And yet, it is this jester-like figure who perhaps commands the most thematic significance of all, as he reveals his own ideological inclinations in a speech which is simultaneously the title drop; he seems the God of Carnage incarnate, provoking the play’s tension all the further as he goes to his phone one more time, Hutchinson’s trickster-like smile suggesting just the subtlest desire for even more chaos.

This is, again, a most wonderful piece of student theatre – an hour and a half of pure theatrical carnage in the intimacy of the Drama Lab. The energy is constant and by the end of the play, one feels as though the black comedy could continue on forever in sweet, uncontrollable ecstasy. Here is student theatre for the ages; here is a production that will linger in our memories, in all of its devilish excellence.

REVIEWED// 23 B&G Fly High WATCH // PLAY Anything Goes Directed by Toby Moffat B&G Play

LUKE MANSILLO

A foray into a dress rehearsal for the Burton and Garran Hall musical the other day to discover the musical is much like B&G food – homemade, substantial and the result of serious team work..

I arrived to the rehearsals to find the band in good form, the troupe of dancers running into tables and the producer tearing out her hair. B&G’s production of the 1934 musical Anything Goes was a bit chaotic one week out, but surely a hive of activity is definitively a good thing. Watching students scurry about under the pressure of the final week of rehearsals was an enjoyable experience, particularly with my knack for Schadenfreude.

The team appear to have all that matters to pull anything off with a degree of success: 1) not enough time and 2) a plan.

Under the leadership of producer Samara Constable and director Toby Moffatt, the production team have managed to cobble together a few achievements. The principle gem in the production”s crown is the band – a good sign for a musical. Consisting of more scientists than musicians, it spins out rousing tunes and ambience under the talented instruction of John Grant.

The signing voice of Alex Norris is truly an asset and an obvious show case for Anything Goes. Without her gifted voice, the musical could have been lacklustre. Unfortunately, other cast members are unable to lift themselves to the same standard, however for an amateur production their efforts are impressive. Ultimately, the production’s sound is damn good, which is what everyone wants in a musical.

In terms of dancing, the enthusiasm and Gus McCubbing checks out the hit comedy by Seth Macfarlane zeal of the performers is striking enough, offering a visually appealing affair, but we best The film is set in modern day Boston the genre or else, what is unfortunately more WATCH // MOVIE not expect the Royal Ballet. and revolves around the often troublesome likely, was simply utilising the little artistic Ted As this is an anniversary year of the Titanménage à trois that has developed between licence he retained whilst following the Directed by Seth MacFarlane John Bennet (Mark Wahlberg), girlfriend ic’s sinking, one summary of the plot could American rom-com precedent.

1hr 46min‎‎, Rated MA be “The Titanic without the Iceberg.“ B&G Lori Collins (Mila Kunis) and Ted (voiced Ultimately, the film’s forté is of course its has a shown great potential. Their adaptaby Seth MacFarlane). Having breathed life entourage of gags, which thankfully do not tion of the shenanigans of a stowaway in love into his teddy bear by making a desperate Much talked about despite coming out rely upon slapstick. Mark Wahlberg does with an engaged heiress on a voyage from childhood wish that it could talk, John’s life in tandem with the Dark Knight Rises, Seth turn out to be reasonably funny; Mila Kunis New York to London is a must-see for the Macfarlane’s feature film debut Ted provides is now split between his careerist girlfriend less so, but still convincing enough to garner ANU theatre community, perhaps not for its and his pot-smoking, furry best friend, Ted. some sort of sympathy from the audience for plenty of laughs without any surprises. somewhat predicable plot but certainly for What ensues is a struggle of influences and In what may be seen as a development in as she endures her tumultuous relationship its execution. his career, Seth MacFarlane, better known as an ultimatum where John must choose bewith the unreliable John. However the broad tween Lori or Ted and the varying lifestyles the voice of Peter Griffen and the creator of majority of the jokes derive from the bear, Anything Goes is showing from 8th August that accompany each one.

Family Guy, has now turned his attentions who, fully exploiting his detachment from through to the 11th with a matinee on the The film dishes up a predictable plot that to the big screen. In doing so, Macfarlane regular society (he is after all a talking teddy 11th. adheres to the protocol of contemporary refreshes a familiar rom-com plotline with bear), determinedly pursues a life of hedonAmerican rom-coms. What I refer to here the addition of the eponymous character, ism. Beyond being the centrepiece of the are scenes or devices of plot development an animated teddy-bear. Having never been film’s humour, the bear also provides novelty which have become so ingrained in the sub- and poses as the only thing that separates particularly inspired by Macfarlane’s previous work, which comprises of namely Family genre that they appear almost as checkpoints Ted from the coma-inducing likes of How Guy, American Dad and The Cleveland Show, through which the film must reluctantly to Lose a Guy in Ten Days or Crazy, Stupid pass. These include the apparently obligatory Love. On a different note, as the bear looks I walked into the film expecting very little. use of a public declaration of love to resurIn fact, I’ve found the aforementioned carvery natural sidled up next to Mark Wahltoons to be near painful experiences – mind- rect the broken relationship, as well as an berg, either ripping a bong or doing tequila epilogue scene which divulges the immedinumbing series based around main charshots with the famous actor, Tippet Studio is ate future of each significant character in acters who simply yell a lot or endure large to be highly commended for their role in the the film (a technique used in my knowledge computer animation wizardry behind Ted, amounts of pain, indicative of what I see as far back as in the 80s classic Fast Times as America’s inability to progress from the another strength of the film. at Ridgemont High). However, as Ted takes belief that slapstick humour is the epitome Whilst the film is quite clearly devoid of of the comedy. Despite this, with the film not a different enough approach to this hackany sort stimulating or challenging subneyed plotline, as can be seen by the total being an animated production, I managed stance, it will definitely make you laugh, anticlimax that is John’s singing to Lori at the which is after all its raison d’être. to dissociate Ted enough from Family Guy in order to give MacFarlane a clean slate and Norah Jones concert, one can only wonder whether MacFarlane was aiming to satirise experience the film more open-mindedly.

Ted Talks

REVIEWED// 24 Exceptional Trilogy Rises Into Legend WATCH // MOVIE The Dark Knight Rises Directed by Christopher Nolan ‎2hr 45min‎‎, Rated M‎ SINEAD O’CONNELL

From Kane’s unprecedented comic to Frank Miller’s renewal of the character in the 1980s, Mr. Nolan continues the legacy of Batman, cultivating the definitive finale to the old familiar romance between good vs. evil. It is a contemporary tale that explores terrorism, corruption, the surveillance state and organised crime lead by fascist vigilantes.

Our new orchestrator of chaos, Bane a.k.a.

“Gotham’s reckoning’” questions foundations of Truth, Justice and Freedom, bringing these abstractions to the highest judgment in his “new era of Western civilization”. Sentiments alluding to the notion of “American Exceptionalism” sound poignantly alongside Hans Zimmer’s composing prowess, yet still there is a void where there should be an avid belief in the exceptionalism supposedly championed by Gotham City.

However in The Dark Night Rises there is no real evidence to justify the salvation of a city countlessly deemed god-forsaken.

Why save “the great people of Gotham” and their “beautiful city”? Are we merely meant to accept the fact that Gotham is Manhattan (yes) and therefore force an alignment of our moral compass with the deliverance of the people of New York City? It’s certainly a more plausible campaign in lieu of the fact Gotham lost its ethics somewhere in the depths of a quasi-fanciful realm in Batman Begins, regained some in The Dark Night throughout the boat mêlée but then sadly lost in the apex when 12 million people are physically absent, and by choice silent, in the face of revolution and annihilation.

The multiple running plots of politics within the movie created a paradigm that echoed scenes from the French revolution

(with direct allusions to Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities), 9/11, the Holocaust and, of course, annexed countries of Africa. As such, there were contradictions that arrested an understanding of the anarchy on screen, leaving unnecessary gaps in the narrative.

For example, save a few, the police almost always play a role among the corrupt antagonists, resulting in the victimisation of both Batman and the wider citizenry. However, trap a few thousand police underground for three months and apparently they will emerge redeemed. Similarly, we see Dent martyred in the opening scene; in turn realising Batman has withdrawn to his cave, humble in his adherence to the belief that Gotham needs Dent to be its “hero with a face”. Towards the end though, when the delinquent city is most vulnerable, they applaud Batman without question, like a war hero. All of this serves only to compromise the film’s integrity.

In saying that, it is nevertheless a powerful film that delves deep into the psyche of any viewer with its provocative special effects.

In many ways, Nolan’s endeavour is a social experiment in itself. He challenges us with radical extremists, political rhetoric and absurd regimes in order to confront our assumptions of what it truly means to be with or without law and order. Furthermore, he brings into play the complexities of power and what constitutes it, captured compellingly when a physically domineering Bane places his palm on a man who symbolises old power and says in honesty, “Do you feel in control?”

A film riddled with meditations on the possible eras awaiting our own civilisation, The Dark Night Rises ends with what we love best: good indeed triumphing over evil. In a nihilistic wasteland void of reasoning, morality and hope, the figure of Batman transcends and ultimately redeems what is lost.

In our current climate, with instabilities and injustices around the world breeding conditions for terror and uncertainty, it is reassuring to see the good man rise as society’s victor, even if it’s all just a story.

He challenges us with radical extremists, political rhetoric and absurd regimes in order to confront our assumptions of what it truly means to be with or without law and order.

May It Never End READ // BOOK The Sense of Ending Julian Barnes 2011 ROBERT SELTH

One of the critics whose comments appear on the cover of last year’s Booker Prize winner, Julian Barnes’ The Sense of an Ending, tells readers that they not only must read this book, they must re-read it. And when you reach the end of this startling and unsettling book, you will quite definitely realise why.

This is a book in which the reality of events can be so thoroughly far removed from the way we witness or understand them that we are shocked, repeatedly, to discover that we must grasp what is happening in increasingly alien ways. The first part of the novel is a broad first-person account of one man’s youth, as he remembers it when he is a much older man. In the second half, the focus narrows dramatically, and we follow a small sequence of events in this man’s old age.

New truths about the events of many years before will come, gradually, to the surface.

The effect is tension on the order of a very, very good thriller, and it carries a severe emotional punch.

In the first part, our narrator Tony and his school friends are joined by a new boy, Adrian Finn, whose serious and unironic attitude to life sets him apart from the pretentious intellectualism of the others. Adrian is very thoughtful and earnest – he gives answers in history class that read like one of the more cringeworthy moments in The History Boys. When the boys go their separate ways to university, they stay in touch, and when Tony has a steady girlfriend he takes her to meet Adrian and the others. Surprising developments ensue. In part two, these will turn out to have been even more surprising than we believe at the time.

The states of mind and the feelings of these insecure, emotional young men are captured very accurately, excepting a few moment when the depictions slide into caricature.

(These are mostly in the high school years, when it feels as though Barnes is deliber-

ately pulling back some of the subtlety of his characterisations in order to give a sense of immaturity, and weakening his creations as a result.) Especially well done is the unpacking of Tony’s relationship with his girlfriend.

And all of this is framed within a consideration of the mercurial, mysterious natures of time and memory – hence the weight given to the history classes in high school. Barnes scatters the fifty pages or so of Tony’s youth with reminders on the subjectivity of this performance, the possible innaccuracy of what he shows, and the allowances we must make for his lack of understanding. “Again, I must stress that this is my reading now of what happened then. Or rather, my memory now of my reading then of what was happening at the time.” These allusions prepare us for the ways in which these themes will be addressed, much more closely, through the book’s real subject. That subject is only very gradually, and with the most thrilling skill, brought into the light.

Yet to say that The Sense of an Ending is about time and memory is to do it a disservice, to make it sound like the kind of laboured intellectual document that one is forced to study in an HSC English classroom. The Sense of an Ending is about human beings, and it is the better for it. More than this, its themes are subtler than the catch-all headings of “time” and “memory” might make you suppose. Like William Golding’s Sea Trilogy (the unsung final masterpiece from the man who wrote Lord of the Flies), this book is much more about the ways in which our actions have consequences far beyond what we may sometimes understand of them; about how tragically limited our perspective on the people around us can so often be; and about how shocking it is that there can be such stupendously, staggeringly wide gulfs between the way we conceive of ourselves and our actions, and the ways we and our actions are received and understood by others. All of which is a very wordy way of saying that this book will grip you and then it will shock you. Perhaps even devastate you. And that, after all, is what makes for a seriously good read.

interested in podcasting?

SPORT// 25 There’s Nothing In The Water We Can’t Fight (Except Gold) have also each won gold, the former in the 100m butterfly and the latter in the 200m freestyle.

Michael Phelps owned the pools in Beijing The Chinese swimmers have done winning eight gold medals. He set the same surprisingly well considering that they defigoals for London 2012 but with his fellow nitely weren’t swimming powerhouses in countryman and friendly rival Ryan Lochte the last few Olympics. Sixteen year old Chitraining hard and beating him in two races nese female swimmer Ye Shiwen completed at the world championships the bar was a stunning race in the women’s 400m indicertainly set high for these Olympics. vidual medley smashing the world record Phelps sure didn’t start the competition by more than a second. What made her well barely qualifying for the men’s 400m swim even more impressive is the fact that individual medley. In the final of the event in the final 50m of the race, she actually Phelps, surprisingly, didn’t even medal, with beat Ryan Lochte’s time in his gold medal Lochte absolutely obliterating the rest of the swim earlier. In the final 100 metres of the swimmers to win his first gold in London. race, Ye clocked a time of 58.68 where as In the men’s 4x100 Lochte swam a freestyle relay, USA time of 58.65. Of were favourites to win course with this with Ryan Lochte and startling time, the Michael Phelps swimChinese teenager ming in the team. was embroiled in However, the French controversy with had felt that they were many people claimrobbed last year when ing that she has they were surpassed by used performance the US in the last 50 enhancing drugs. meteres to finish secThis was inevitable ond. This time around with China’s shady though, a sense of deja past in the use of vu occurred when Ryan PEDs for their Lochte blew a lead in the swimmers in 1980’s final 50 metres and was an 90’s. What also beaten by milliseconds didn’t help was the

by French swimmer fact that five junior Yannick Agnel. Putting Chinese swimmers the French atop the gold were banned after using PED’s in 2009. podium with the US having to look up at Amid all the controversy, Ye Shiwen them in silver. again broke a record (Olympic record this Ryan Lochte being the favourite to postime) in the 200m individual medley on the sibly emulate the impossible gold medal tally fourth day. that Phelps had achieved in 2008 failed to Male swimmer Yang Sun has also fared medal in the 200m freestyle, with Frenchwell for the Chinese winning one of each man Yannick Agnel again finishing first. medal thus far.

On the fourth day of the competition The Australians, probably fielding their Phelps finally won his first gold of the games weakest swim team in a number of years in the men’s 4x200m relay. No only was have not been up to par in London. The this his first gold in London, but it was also women have won one gold medal in the his 19th medal of all time, making him the 4x100m freestyle relay, but that has been most decorated Olympian in the history of their only gold so far in swimming and the games. Phelps also almost became the in fact the whole Olympics. Alicia Coutts first person to win gold in the same event in has one silver and one bronze as well as three separate Olympics, the 200m butterfly. her relay gold. Bronte Barrat has a bronze, He came so close, leading until the last 25 Emily Seebohn has a silver and Christian metres where he lost by a whisker.

Sprenger has a silver being the only Aussie American duo, Matthew Grevers and Nick bloke to medal so far in the games.

Thoman, finished first and second respecOverall, an interesting start to the Olymtively in the Men’s 100m backstroke on the pic swimming, filled with tight races and fourth day. plenty of surprising results. However, there The US women have also been doing well are still many more races to come with in swimming with 17 year old Missy Frank- plenty of medals to be won. We can only lin winning her first gold in the 100m back- hope it continues to be as exciting as it has stroke. Dana Vollmer and Allison Schmitt been.

JOSHUA CHU-TAN

This was inevitable with China’s shady past in the use of PEDs for their swimmers in 1980s and 90s. What also didn’t help was the fact that five junior Chinese swimmers were banned after using PED’s in 2009.

The Dark Butterfly

MURRAY ROBERTSON

Nick D’Arcy can swim butterfly faster than all but a handful of people in the world. He was widely considered a medal chance at the London Olympics and has a rival in Michael Phelps, perhaps the greatest swimmer/athlete in the history of competition. Yet many Australians would make a strong argument that he doesn’t deserve to swim for Australia, not only in the Olympics but also in competition generally and they would probably be correct.

D’Arcy is going to attract unwanted public criticism and outcry for the rest of his career, and it is not for the fact that there is a misplaced apostrophe in his name but rather his cavalier attitude. D’Arcy king-hit fellow swimmer Simon Cowley the night of D’Arcy being named in the 2008 Beijing Olympic team. The subsequent four years have done nothing to adhere him to a public now baying for his blood.

The hit that D’Arcy put on Cowley forced the three-time Commonwealth games medallist to have plates and screws inserted into his face, along with reconstructive surgery.

D’Arcy may lack combat training, but a superbly conditioned swimmer at the height of his powers has the tools to do some damage.

Obliterating a fellow athletes face was rightly deemed to have brought the Swimming team and Australian sport into disrepute and the punishment was omission from the Olympic team. Rather then showing remorse and accepting the consequences of his actions, D’Arcy went on a counter-attack. He not only appealed that decision once but twice, not the actions of the contrite.

His penultimate move to villain occurred last year, where he filed for bankruptcy in a move that sadly lacked compassion.

Regardless of the truth to these claims, the facts are that D’Arcy appears to have shirked any responsibility caused by his assault and plans on moving on with his life. Simon Cowley on the other hand, must now face life with a reconfigured face and a pocket bereft of damages ordered to him by the court.

The pre-Olympic gun saga with fellow ‘chump’ Kenrick Monk, he of the skateboarding fame, paints a picture of a young man oblivious to any form of repercussions or consequences, unsurprising considering the lack of punishment that he has been graced with.

Watching D’Arcy bomb out in the semifinals of his one and only event, it finally appeared that his troubled past had caught up with him. A heavy silence followed the announcement of his name and his meek swim confirmed his banishment from these Olympics. His failure saves Australia the embarrassment of D’Arcy potentially being feted as a hero. He leaves the Olympics with nothing.

Sport can be an arena of redemption, a playing field where colour, race and beliefs don’t count for anything. Nick D’Arcy did not find redemption in the pool in London because sport is not a powerful enough medium in which to redeem him and if the greatest sporting event on earth cannot atone a man, then you have to wonder what will.

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SPORT// 26

The Eels Are Winning?

Rugby League Update

ZACH MACKEY

with so much promise, but couldn’t deliver in two years what Arthur has done in two The NRL has been shocked with the recent weeks – consecutive wins. The new coach form of the Parramatta Eels. A team that has had experience of coaching troubled Sportsbet was paying $1.45 to record the teams, in 1997 as captain-coach of the winmost losses for the season at the beginning less Bateman’s Bay Tigers, where the next of July have now beaten two of the bigyear he turned things around, leading the gest clubs in the past week. The Melbourne team to the finals. This was again achieved Storm and Brisbane Broncos have tumbled in the same role for the Cairns Brothers consecutively as the Eels charge onwards, Football team. leaving in their dust the Cronulla Sharks The final four games he is in charge of and Manly Sea Eagles – all top 8 teams. So the Eels won’t provide Arthur with the opthe question, delivered with more than a portunity for such a swift turnaround, but pinch of disbelief, has shot around the rugby based on the team’s current form, he does league community – ‘The Eels have won?! hold the key to a formula that in the not And beaten the Storm and Broncos?!’ too distant future will leave Arthur as hot The games against the Storm and Broncos property of the coaching world. has provided promise for what the Eels can Arthur has only been signed until the achieve, as did their second half perforend of the year, when current NSW Origin mance against Manly where they scored 24 Coach, Ricky Stuart will take over the unanswered points. Even so, in that parreigns in Paramatta. This development put ticular match, Manly still scored 40 points smiles on many Eels fans, and a glimmer of to win. This is an all too familiar problem hope has emerged. for Parramatta, as evidenced by the Broncos Even though the Eels have finally shown scoring two tries in the first five minutes their fans that they can play winning footof the second half. During a season where ball, and given them belief for next season, points from byes have made up almost a the season still lays in front of them. They third of competition points, the Eels still have only won five games so far and could look like battling. Fixtures ahead include be facing their first wooden spoon since tough sides, as well as teams like the Drag1972. With a few tough fixtures in store, the ons who are always able to put up a fight.

Eels could continue on the disastrous path Parramatta has not beaten any of their upits been following for the majority of the coming opponents in their past encounters season, and the fans might just have to wait this season, but recent form will hopefully for next year. After recently signing superindicate a change in the road. coach Stuart, and with the biggest flop of Interim coach, Brad Arthur, could be 2012, Chris Sandow, beginning to show he the key to Parramatta’s success. Beating the might be worth the $500 000 plus contract Broncos has been the caretaker’s second he is on, next year might just be the year for win since taking over from sacked Stephen the Parramatta Eels. Watch this space.

Kearney, the coach who arrived out West

Cadel, I Luff You

time trial and from there never looked like MURRAY ROBERTSON he was going to challenge a dominant Sky Integrity is a fickle beast because it can take years to gain and yet in a flurry of words Team with their side-burns wielding leader or a televised press conference, it can be lost Bradley Wiggins.

In what was actually a Tour lacking in forever. Which brings us to the integrityany major upsets, the ability of Team Sky destroying, hot pot of denial that is the Tour to control the proceedings throughout the de France. race, whilst certainly an impressive show of The 2012 instalment of Le Tour saw a number of riders say goodbye to their hardearned integrity and a handful firmly entrench themselves as bona-fide champions.

Firstly, we should start with the riders who weren’t lining up for the Prologue.

Alberto Contador was tied up serving his two-year doping sentence, which he has vehemently denied. While he still remains a two-time winner of the Tour, he will forever be remembered for the 2010 title which was stripped off him, a stain on a flawless career.

Frank Schleck of the Radioshack-Nissan team left the tour in disgrace after two positive drug tests, a sad end for a respected rider. His brother Andy, who was handed the 2010 Tour after Contador’s failings, now must surely be under suspicion.

However, that brings us to our own chiselled-faced, jockey-esque, high-voiced little aussie hero in Cadel Evans. With a number 1 on his back signifying his success in 2011, Cadel was one of a handful of riders who had the weaponry to win the 3-week race. However, he was hobbled from the start, losing a big chunk of time in the first

strength, robbed the race of its panache and an Australian victory.

Yet while Cadel failed to take home backto-back victories, he emerged with something far more important, his integrity, and in doing so, ushers in a new era of cycling.

The murky years of the late 1990s and 2000s have thrown up champions and seen them

come back to earth with positive drug tests and tattered reputations. From 1996, a string of doping scandals has repeatedly rocked the Tour, Bjarne Riis, Jan Ullrich, Marco Pantani, Alexandro Vinokourov, Floyd Landis, Ivan Basso, Michel Rasmussen, Contador, Jesoba Beloki and Schleck all top riders of the past 20 years, all have failed drug tests. Which quietly brings us to Lance Armstrong. Once again under an investigation and hemmed in by facts, however much it pains me to say this, it is looking doubtful that he is the beacon of purity that millions believe. Was he such a phenomenal athlete that he consistently beat his competitors buoyed by drugs? Or did he succumb to the same temptation that they did? The argument for the latter, sadly, grows.

What this means for cycling is that there is a gaping, 15-year hole in the history of the Tour De France, where every champion from 1996-2010 who has either failed or been associated with drugs, must be forgotten.

Cadel’s 2012 race may appear as a failure, and he would agree it was a failure, yet for the health of cycling it should be lauded. The guttural look of agony that was permanently etched on his face for the majority of the race proves that cycling’s grand champion is a clean one. Cadel now ushers in a new era of cycling, a figurehead for a tainted sport, however odd that head may look.

SPORT// 27

The British Empire Strikes Back CALLUM FRYER

ity, not to be carried alone though, for the first time in history, Australia has a profesA sequel movie to a box office hit, general- sional road cycling team; GreenEdge. The ly not too bad because it’s of the same ilk but stage was set, Australians were prepared, never quite lives up to the first. So was the SBS was geared up and the headlines were tour of 2012. The tour of 2011, for Austral- readied. The only problem was, it was a ians, was the first. flop. A horrible mix of old ideas, bad plot The first Australian winner of the world’s twists and frustrating glimmers of the fugreatest cycling race brought the Tour de ture not quite bright France and professional cycling to the more enough to light up immediate public eye. At a train station in the tour but just Melbourne not a week before the tour this enough to make peoyear there was a billboard advertising the ple feel like they saw Tour de France, saying ‘Yellow, the only true a spectacle worthy of colour for Australia’. Not five years ago my calling itself the Tour father lost Cadel Evans a bet with his wife. de France.

My father approached him at a function The raw facts; and, a little star struck, said to him “I’m the yellow jersey sorry to disturb you but I’m a great fan and changed hands once, I thoroughly enjoyed watching you this the winner, a Brityear, with the heart you raced, it was great ish rider, Bradley to watch.” Cadel turned to his Italian wife as Wiggins, never fell lower than second. The she laughed and handed her five dollars. He green jersey did likewise, ending up with then turned to my dad and said “sorry, I bet a Slovakian named Peter Sagan, one of the my wife that no one here would recognise future lights. The polka dot jersey was one me and she couldn’t believe it, you just lost of the only battles of interest, changing me five dollars.” Five years ago Cadel was hands a few times with it going down to the more famous in Italy than his home country, second last day and requiring a Hail Mary indeed his home city. Now everyone knows to pull it off. Thomas Voeckler, the fighthim. ing Frenchman, went on a day long attack So with that fame now comes responsibil- to salvage something out of a tour he may

have thought lost a few days earlier. The white jersey, for the best young rider also changed hands once. Ending with Tejay van Garderen, an American, a future.

Bradley Wiggins and Team Sky controlled the race as if he was Lance Armstrong and they were US Postal. Cadel Evans, the main challenger, faltered like he was Jan Ullrich. Thibaut Pinot, the youngster rider in the race, a Frenchman, rode, attacked and defended like the great Richard Virenque. Wiggins’ lieutenant, Chris Froome, rode strongly on the front of the bunch, but there was a hint of “I could drop you too” almost as if he were telling his team leader that things should be different, rather reminiscent of Floyd Landis’ last year under Lance Armstrong.

This was a year that we’d all seen before.

There was the typical drug scandal, Frank Schleck, finally returning a positive sample to a drug test and claiming poisoning of all things. How that’s supposed to get him off the hook we’ll never know. Under the cycling anti doping charter, it states that a

The stage was set, Australians were prepared, SBS was geared up and the headlines were readied. The only problem was, it was a flop.

rider is solely responsible for everything that goes in his body. Claiming poisoning doesn’t exonerate him, just illustrates that he’s either unimaginative, paranoid or with it enough to know that someone’s poisoning him, but not quite to know where, or to take it to the authorities before they took it to him. In true Tour fashion, there was the rise of a new champion, Thibaut Pinot, the 22 year old Frenchman who gave the French hope. He lit up mountains and proved that the French can actually still ride bikes. The fading of a champion, as much as I hate to write about it, also happened. Cadel Evans will not win the Tour again. When he won he was the oldest winner since the Second World War. To do it again this year would have been hard, however with his old rivals, his new rivals, his age, and the almost guaranteed mountainous parcours next year, a repeat of that feat will be nigh on impossible. Sadly Australia’s shooting star has faded.

However next year, like with every good idea, Batman, Superman, Kung Fu Panda, we will be watching, and boy do we have reasons. Next year is the 100th running of the greatest annual sporting event on the earth.

With the new possible French heroes, in the 100th edition, you can bet all stops will be pulled out, a spectacle will appear, we will watch and it will be fantastic.

DIGESTED READINGS

Bezukhov gets himself very mixed up in Masonic affairs, frees his serfs, marries a beautiful woman who is sleeping with her own brother, gets himself mixed up in a duel despite the fact that he seems never to have fired a gun in his life, and at this point, I regret to say, we aren’t even halfway through the novel.

The long and the short of it – by which I mean the long of it – is that Bezukhov goes off to fight against Napoleon, tries to assassinate him, gets caught, goes on a gruelling march, realises the futility of life, is rescued, and marries his best friend’s wife, Natasha.

And if you thought that would be the end TOM WESTLAND Examining commonly held of it, then I have some rather distressing Before we get started today, I’d like to beliefs with a blow torch and a news to impart: there are Epilogues. Plural. acknowledge the thunderous reception bunker buster (As you may have realised, we’ve only really that greeted my previous essay on Melville’s done War so far; several thousand pages Moby Dick. My secretary has been simply in and we still haven’t even broached the inundated with correspondence and adversubject of Peace.) tising material, and it may be several weeks In these epilogues, Tolstoy declares that before I am able to respond personally to the History is entirely meaningless, and come tens of readers who wrote to me for clarifica- to think of it, so is his novel, and so really tion or to offer me a discount rate on my gas he’s sorry for making you sit through the connection. entire performance, but by now, the bookarrival of cosmic rays, as some theoretical Today I would like to move on to another store where you purchased the novel has physicists like to do. But leaving such a decikey work in the Western canon: Leo Tolstoy’s probably gone into receivership, and you’re sion to the minute fluctuations in the cosmic War and Peace. left to find space, somewhere, for this epic background radiation comes at a cost. Even Our story begins with Anna Pavlovna monument to the power of human insomthese fluctuations are tied to a cause; one will Schera telling Prince Vasili Kuragin that nia. be weighing the decision to employ someone there’s bound to be a war with Napoleon. based on fluctuations that occurred to the And several weeks later, as you emerge grim space–time continuum at the very moment and bleary-eyed from your reading room, of the Big Bang. Making an employment you begin to understand that old Anna Pavdecision based on the whim of the finger lovna Schera isn’t half as stupid as she looks. of God is to discriminate towards religions We soon meet our hero, Pierre Bezukhov, with such an idea of God, in a tenuous who is fat and clumsy and who probably echo of the doctrine of predestination: the doesn’t brush his teeth as much as his dentist hallmark of the German theologian Martin would like. Bezukhov is the son of a very Luther, progenitor of the very same proteswealthy man, but alas, not the son of a very tant work ethic which drove the efficiency of wealthy man’s wife. As a consequence, nothe Final Solution. body except Leo Tolstoy takes him very seriFinally all that is left is to simply accept ously, until he suddenly and unexpectedly that the world is intrinsically deterministic ends up inheriting his father’s vast estate, at and that your decision was predetermined, which point everyone takes him very seribased on the initial conditions of the uniously, except for Leo Tolstoy, who promptly verse — but this would be blatant discrimiinsists on turning his hero into a Freemason. nation on the basis of the initial conditions of what cosmologists call a “goldilocks universe”, in another overt act of favouring blonde-haired, blue-eyed, Aryanist notions of goodness and an egregious example of discrimination against universes which didn’t have the chance to support life or sustain matter for more than a few nanoseconds. After all, do not the inhabitants of these disadvantaged universes need the most protection from such Nazi-ish decision making?

Ultimately your attempt to avoid politically incorrect discrimination in the workplace will result in you inadvertently enacting, at the most fundamental ontological level, the monstrous, Ariosophic ideologies of Heinrich Himmler.

Q.E.D.

The Back Page PERLUSTRATING ASSERVATIONS

“You should avoid discrimination when hiring people” JAMIE FREESTTONE MATHEW MCGANN There is an assumed opinion that one should not discriminate against people based on their gender, race or beliefs when hiring new people for a job. The idea being that one’s biological, ethnic and intellectual characteristics should not dictate one’s future, be it in their personal or professional lives.

This asseverance seems difficult to refute, as discrimination has obvious associations with glass ceilings, eugenics and religious intolerance. But is it actually possible to avoid discrimination?

Because preconceptions, biases and the dominant cultural discourses are bound to cloud your own judgement, the first step in avoiding discrimination would be to remove your personal feelings from the decision making process. The easiest way to do this would be to employ some independent third party to make the appointment. You would require a disinterested, machine-like, humourless person who is willing to just follow your orders of impartiality without ever consulting their own conscience. Unfortunately such uber-efficient people are always prone to fly off into the worst kind of discrimination, cf. Germany c.1945.

You could try and remove people from the hiring process altogether and defer to a rule, by hiring on a “first in, best dressed” policy.

Unfortunately, this would only discriminate in favour of punctual, and therefore German, people, which would inadvertently favour the Aryan race, in an act of racial discrimination, oddly redolent of the Nazis themselves.

The next option would be to use random numbers, by utilising the timings of the

WORONI BOOKSHELF

WHAT I THINK WHEN I SEE A TUMBLR ABOUT CANBERRA.