Woroni: Edition 11, 2012

BEATING OFF HOSTEL WANKERS

THE BIBLE READER IN UNION COURT

BLUR REVISITED

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WORONI The Australian National University Newspaper Since 1948

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NO.11 VOL 64

SEP 05

He’s not a Liberal, he’s a very naughty boy BEN HENSCHKE

The ANU has removed an undergraduate intern from the office of a Liberal senator after it was revealed the student ran as a Labor candidate in this year’s Queensland state election.

Tasmanian Senator Stephen Parry (pictured below) notified the University when a Coalition staffer recognised the intern, Aaron Santelises of Griffith University, during a Liberal Party briefing. The ANU dismissed Mr Santelises from his placement as soon as his past became known.

Senator Parry told The Canberra Times that he assumed the ANU checked the backgrounds of each student taking part in its semester-long Australian National Internships Program (ANIP), which places interns in Parliament, government departments and non-government organisations.

Mr Santelises has said he did not divulge his history because he was afraid it would preclude him from the program. The application form on the ANIP website does not require students to declare any political affiliations.

This is the first time that a student has been removed from a placement for failing to state his or her political background.

A spokesperson for the ANU told The Common Thread.”

Canberra Times that it would reassess the The Front Row Ticket and A Naked ANU- application process to ensure the probSA were able to steal away nine positions, lem does not reoccur. Mr Santelises’s including seven general representatives (four place in ANIP is currently under review. from Front Row Ticket and three from A Naked ANUSA) and two faculty representatives (one from each ticket for College of Arts and Social Sciences and College of Asia and the Pacific). The mixed pool of general representatives may pose some hurdles to Common Thread pushing through their policy agenda.

As the only major ticket running candidates for the National Union of Students, Front Row Ticket saw two members elected as delegates. All Collective officers, who were Article continues on page 2

Students Catch Pink Eye

as Common Thread Ties Up ANUSA Elections

NAKUL LEGHA CAM WILSON

The Common Thread ticket has dominated the most contested yet least attended Australian National University Students’ Association (ANUSA) election in recent years, winning 23 of the 32 positions they contested. Independent candidates and six separate tickets offered up a total of 117 candidates with A Naked ANUSA, Common Thread and The Front Row Ticket contesting all executive, faculty and general representative positions.

Candidates for the pink T-shirt-toting Common Thread ticket, led by Aleks Sladojevic, were successful by considerable margins in most contested positions. The white- (or

rather, pink-) wash of executive positions was particularly notable, with all candidates being assured of their victory through commanding first preference votes alone.

“After months of planning, meeting new people, and developing our policy platforms, we couldn’t have been more stoked with the election outcome,” President-elect Ms Sladojevic told Woroni.

Fellow candidate for President, Galvin Chia of A Naked ANUSA, was more circumspect: “[It] might be prudent to specify the nature of the Common Thread “victory”. Five out of six Collective officers are independent, seven other representative positions went to Front Row and Naked, and none of the National Union of Students delegates are from

COMPOSITION OF 2013 ANUSA NAKED ANUSA

Show us your ANUSA!

FRONT ROW SUSTAINABILITY COMMON THREAD

STRONG WOMEN INDEPENDENT

GENDER PERCENTAGE OF 2013 ANUSA

AVERAGE NUMBER OF FACEBOOK FRIENDS OF PEOPLE WHO RAN FOR EXECUTIVE POSITIONS

848 : 728 GOT ELECTED

46.5% MALE

UNLELECTED

53.5% FEMALE

A VIRGIN HACK’S EXPERIENCE [5] THE HYPOCRISY OF PUSSY RIOT [6] REVIEWED: MOONRISE KINGDOM [20] LANCE [23]

NEWS//2

ANU Spring Debating

Students Catch Pink Eye

VINCENT CHIANG

Article continued from page 1

predominantly independents, were elected unopposed.

Asked what the difference was between Common Thread and other tickets, Ms Sladojevic said: “Policy was one of our strong points. We started brainstorming and researching quite early on. Having the time to flesh out some of the key issues meant we came out with well-defined ideas that students could vote on.”

There were accusations of “policy plagiarism” at Woroni’s ANUSA Election Debate, with Front Row Ticket and Common Thread exchanging barbs about notably similar policy platforms on issues such as financials accountability, free breakfasts and faculty camps.

In a concerning trend for advocates of more student engagement with ANUSA, only 1515 votes were cast out of an undergraduate student body of approximately 10,400. It is yet another low turnout in a downward drift which has seen 1697 votes cast in 2011, 1125 in 2010 (a year which did not have any major competing tickets), 2013 in 2009 and 1857 in 2008.

In addition, donkeys made a valiant showing, with the positions of President and VicePresident receiving 123 and 155 informal votes respectively.

It is understood that the cost of running a paper election is approximately $15,000.

Concerns have been raised about the viability of this outlay given that only 14.5 per cent of the student body participated in the elections. Electronic voting has been proposed as a method of increasing student participation although the present ANUSA executive has not indicated there will be a change to the present system.

Mr Chia told Woroni: “The results show there is a growing consciousness amongst the student body that prospective candidates must rely on much more than the traditional election tactics of flyering, postering, saturating Union Court and striking alliances with political parties.”

He believed Common Thread had created expectations which now needed to be met: “I expect next year’s executive to deliver and be accountable to all of their 73-page policy document, transparently handle the fallout from the “misappropriation” fiasco…and increase general student participation in student issues.”

Ms Sladojevic said that in the lead-up to assuming office, her team would prioritise mental health and wellbeing initiatives, increasing the size of faculty camps and the development of an ANUSA smartphone app.

The newly elected ANUSA executive will commence their term from 1 December 2012.

The ANU Spring Debating tournament was held between the 31st of August and the 2nd of April. Considered one of the most notable events on the annual debating calender, the tournament played host to almost 150 debaters from across Australia.

Across the weekend, debaters argued over motions such as “This House would storm the embassy of Ecuador” and, with many impressive discussions flaring from debaters who had previously competed to great success at the World Universities Debating Championships.

For ANU itself, the tournament proved a significant success, with ANU debaters Richard Keys, Thomas Goldie, Emily Stirzaker and Laura Birchall all breaking in teams of

two to the tournament’s finals series. Experienced ANU adjudicators Jacqui Yates and Michaela Flanigan were also asked to act as judges for the tournament’s grand final.

Ultimately, the tournament was won by the University of Sydney debaters Paul Karp and Michael Rees, who prevailed in affirming the motion “This House celebrates the decline of a distinctive Gay culture” with arguments concerning the optimistic potential for biological factors no longer defining individual identity. At the tournament’s denouement, it was also announced that both Laura Birchall and Thomas Goldie had ranked as the top ten speakers of the tournament, placing the two above several speakers who had previously competed in the Australasian Intervarsity Debating Championships.

Full election results are on page 8

BRIEFLY WITH SHAN-VERNE LIEW Fairfax axe

Mental Health

As part of job cuts throughout Fairfax Media, editorial staff at The Canberra Times have been asked to nominate themselves for voluntary redundancy. The request has been oversubscribed, and the newspaper’s entire night sub-editorial desk of 11 journalists has applied to leave, according to City News.

Cartoonist Ian Sharpe will also be leaving.

The recently released ACT Chief Health Officer’s Report found that 9.8% of ACT adult residents had reported symptoms of high to very high psychological distress between 2009-2010, up from 9.0% in 2007-2008. Anxiety and depression were responsible for 60% of all reported cases.

Mosque Approved, Bigots Lose

Some Action on ACT Transport?

In a recent notice, the ACT Planning and Land Authority approved plans for the construction of a mosque in Gungahlin. “The proposed development will contribute to social sustainability and inclusion,” stated the notice. Submissions claiming that the mosque would affect social harmony were dismissed. “Many were also unsubstantiated (largely drawn from internet sources), incapable of verification or matters of opinion.”

In the lead-up to territory elections, the ACT Government is expected to announce a final proposal for either a light rail system or a rapid bus lane corridor between Civic and Gungahlin. Other election promises, from various candidates, have included WiFi on Action buses, a Sydneyto-Canberra bullet train, articulated 14.5m buses with capacity for up to 107 passengers, and an expanded public transport network. [sarcastic/skeptical comment here]

Correction

The article “Poor State of the Union” by In “Union Politburo Fails on AccountabilJohn Casey from Edition 10 was wrongly at- ity”, published in Edition 10, we erroneously tributed to Stuart Ferrie. We sincerely apolo- printed that a question was asked about why gise for this error in the editing process. a previous director was reappointed onto the Union Board. This was not the case.

EDITORIAL BOARD Liv Clark Farz Edraki Nakul Legha Yasmin Masri Gus McCubbing Dan Rose Lisa Visentin Cam Wilson

RU486 on the Register SHAN-VERNE LIEW The Therapeutic Goods Administration (TGA) has registered mifepristone, an abortion drug, for wider use in Australia.

Previously, only a handful of doctors in Australia were authorised to import the drug for prescription, and major pharmaceutical companies had been reluctant to import the drug for distribution to Australia because of cost pressures.

MS Health, which is a pharmaceutical subsidiary, will now be importing and regulating distribution of mifepristone. Doctors who complete a training course will may now directly prescribe the drug for collection from local pharmacies Mifepristone, which is also known as RU486, is used for terminating pregnancies up to 49 days after gestation.

Tight regulation of the drug has previously hindered the ability of women to undergo an abortion, due to financial and geographic barriers, said ANUSA Women’s Officer Re-

SUB EDITORS Ben Henschke Shan-Verne Liew Alex O’Sullivan Gareth Robinson Vincent Chiang Jess Millen Josh Chu-Tan

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nee Jones.

“It’s an incredibly safe procedure. Choice over reproductive rights is a human right, and it has long been a human right,” she said.

Previously, only 187 doctors in Australia, mostly located in cities, had been registered to seek approval for prescribing mifepristone.

“There was no equity of access for women in rural and remote areas,” NSW Family Planning director Dr Deborah Bateson wrote in The Sydney Morning Herald.

“This decision means true access for women,” said Ms Jones. Many cannot easily afford to travel to cities and visit private health clinics, she added.

Opponents of mifepristone have associated the drug with serious health risks from sepsis and a lower success rate relative to other abortion methods.

The pharmacists in Canberra contacted by Woroni said they were unsure when mifepristone would be supplied in pharmacies.

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NEWS// 3

State meets Church as pollies court Christians BEN HENSCHKE

Chief Minister Katy Gallagher and Opposition Leader Zed Seselja rebuffed calls for tighter regulation of Canberra’s pornography industry and split over the definition of marriage as they chased the Christian vote at the ANU on 30th August.

Addressing an Australian Christian Lobby forum at the School of Music’s Llewellyn Hall, the Labor and Liberal leaders fielded questions encompassing gay marriage, the sex trade, pornography, support for church organisations and the teaching of religion in schools.

Asked whether they were proud that Canberra-produced pornography is reaching Indigenous communities, the leaders agreed that the problem would not be solved by an outright ban on the ACT industry.

“It’s probably a bit more complex,” Ms Gallagher said. When challenged that the sex trade declined in Scandinavian countries after it was banned, the Labor leader ruled out prohibiting prostitution.

“Some of the sex workers have been pushed underground,” she said. “I would not like to see anything that pushed that trade back underground.”

“It’s not an easy one,” agreed Mr Seselja. He did not commit to a church leader’s call for the ACT Government to send a delegation to investigate the issue in Scandinavia, but said

that the program would be “worthy of examination.”

The leaders disagreed when questioned about their definition of marriage and the ideal composition of the family.

Speaking on the day that Tasmania’s Labor- and Green-led lower house passed laws allowing same-sex marriage, Mr Seselja affirmed the Liberal Party’s position that marriage is between a man and a woman. “We support the traditional definition of marriage,” which provides for the “special” status of marriage between a man and a woman, he said to applause from the crowd.

He also stated that children are best raised in households with a mother and father, although he admitted that this is not always possible. “The ideal place for a child to grow up is with a loving mother and father,” he said.

Ms Gallagher, herself a single parent, countered that, “The definition of families is very diverse.”

Clearly differentiating herself from Mr Seselja, she reiterated her party’s support for same-sex marriages and said she was “proud to lead a socially progressive government.”

“The Labor Party’s view is for same-sex couples to have the same rights as other citizens. We’ve done that in many other areas and we don’t see any reason not to do that in marriage equality,” she said.

Carr tackles regional Co-Ops To Tackle ACT’s Instability in ANU Address Full House HARRY WALL

A recent territory government report has recommended exploring cooperative models of housing as a solution to ACT’s student housing crisis.

The third recommendation advised “that the ACT Government explore developing student co-operative models, along the lines of the Sydney University model, with ANU or UC.” Titled Accommodation Needs for Tertiary Students in the ACT, the report was issued by the ACT Legislative Assembly Standing Committee on Education, Training and Youth Affairs.

Housing co-operatives are student-run housing associations in which members pay rent as well as communal money for food, events and general housekeeping supplies.

Students are also collectively responsible for housekeeping duties “The ACT is potentially an ideal place for an approach to alternative accommodation models for students”, stated the report.

“There is a need for innovation and novel solutions to satisfy demand for affordable student housing.”

Members of the Canberra Student Housing Co-op (CSHC) warmly welcomed the report.

“It’s great to see that our student-driven solution, which provides affordable, sustainable and awesome accommodation, is getting the recognition it deserves,” said CSHC director Tom Stayner.

The report comes at a time when there is growing pressure on the ACT Government to provide Canberra’s burgeoning student

population with affordable and appropriate accommodation.

The Housing Co-operative at Havelock House in Turner started housing six students in October last year, and now accommodates 22 ANU students. But adequate and affordably priced housing is still an issue for many in Canberra’s high-priced property market.

“I really enjoy cooperative living and I hope that the government can do something so that more students can live like this,” CSHC member Fergus Henderson said.

ANUSA has identified housing problems as a major concern for ANU students and has highlighted the importance of community in undergraduate accommodation.

“Students are significantly more satisfied with cooperative housing than they are with commercially run student accommodation,” ANUSA president Dallas Proctor said.

Mr Proctor said co-operative living creates a sense of community that helps students maintain a healthy balance between study and social activity. He added that the low price of rent at the Co-operative would be advantageous for students from disadvantaged backgrounds.

Co-operative living began in Australia in 1982 when a group of Sydney University students converted a dilapidated glass-making factory into a spacious communal house in Newtown, Sydney.

The model was emulated by the CSHC. With the committee’s recent report, it appears that co-operative living will become an increasingly popular form of housing in the future.

BEN HENSCHKE

Foreign Minister Bob Carr has used a speech at the ANU to outline a path to a peaceful resolution of the international standoff in the South China Sea. Delivering the annual ST Lee Lecture on Asia and the Pacific, Senator Carr reflected on Asia’s rapid economic growth in the last half-century, pointing to vast increases in health indicators and the number of females attending secondary and tertiary education.

However, he warned that the benefits of this economic growth are “too great to be put at risk” by clashes in the South China Sea. China, Taiwan, the Philippines, Vietnam, Malaysia and Brunei make overlapping territorial and maritime claims in the resourcerich area. Australia takes no position on the claims but seeks to avoid conflict in the region, through which 60% of Australia’s maritime trade passes.

“Australia does not take sides on the territorial disputes,” he said, “but we call on countries to pursue their territorial claims and accompanying maritime rights in accordance with international law, including the United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea.” Senator Carr recommended the Antarctic Treaty System and Joint Development Zones as models for cooperation in the disputed area.

Under the Antarctic Treaty, “countries have for more than 50 years put aside their differences over sovereignty and cooperated to promote peace and science,” he said. Cambodia, Malaysia, Thailand and Vietnam have agreed on Joint Development Zones, which allow for shared development of seabed re-

sources.

“Thinking creatively and constructively and examining models like these provides a path that deserves to be explored,” he said.

In response to a question regarding Australia’s position on Tibet, Senator Carr praised Australia and China’s bilateral human rights dialogue, in which the two countries have discussed Tibet as well as Indigenous health and welfare in Australia.

The Australian Ambassador sought to visit Tibet this March to investigate a spate of selfimmolations by Buddhist monks, but China denied her request.

“Our view is that our Ambassador ought to be able to go to Tibet,” he said. Australia recognises Chinese sovereignty over Tibet but has often raised concerns over the treatment of Tibetans.

Senator Carr’s position on Tibet came under scrutiny when he became Foreign Minister in March. Last June, in a now-deleted post on his blog, Thoughtlines, he advised the Prime Minister not to meet the Dalai Lama, who he called a “cunning monk” with a “mischievous agenda in pursuit of theocratic power.”

Senator Carr also addressed the challenges Australia faces as it tackles gender equality in the Pacific.

Australia is working with the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation to increase access to family planning, but in countries such as the Solomon Islands, high malaria rates are preventing girls from attending school and women from working.

“The indicators are pretty sad there,” he said.

COMMENT// 4

Akin the Symptom, not the Disease

TWO MINUTES WITH ROSS MCQUINN Describe the Ross McQuinn Brand’s sound: If Avicii met ABBA and they had a baby.

And then, meanwhile, Europe and Kiss met and had a baby. And by some miracle, those two babies met and fucked - this would the shit that they birthed.

What are your musical influences?

Aside from our musical ancestry, our influences are Snoop Lion and Metta World Peace - his new single is dope.

What was the craziest gig you’ve had?

The craziest gig we have had has to be the Let Snoop Dogg into Australia Live Aid concert. We jammed with Seal, Delta and Keith Urban, turns out it was a trial for the voice.

DONG HYUN SUH

Republican Representative Todd Akin’s belief that women have the magical ability to repel a rapist’s sperm from their uterus has been the subject of widespread criticism, public debate and political furore in the United States. The now infamous remark – that “legitimate rape” rarely results in pregnancy Describe a day in the life of Ross McQuinn?

– was made in a television interview aired on 12:30 Breakfast of 12 Weet Bix August 19 as part of his answer to a question 1pm Lunch asking whether women who become preg2pm -8pm Watch Community nant as a result of rape should be allowed to 8pm - 8-15 Band Practice (we don’t need have abortions. much) Shocking? Yes. Surprising? Hardly.

8-15 dinner, Usually KFC ‘cos my body is a Akin has now said that he misspoke when temple he suggested that women have an inbuilt 9pm-3am Community mechanism to prevent pregnancy in cases of “legitimate rape”, thereby making abortion What’s in store for O-Week 2013? for victims of rape redundant, and made his O-week will be a max wicked sick week, insinuation that there exists a type of not-sowith heaps of maximum extreme stunts. Our serious rape, invoking the ‘lying slut’ trope. show will mostly have stunts I have done Even when viewed in isolation, these remarks since forever. Once I did a boom gnarly are deeply disturbing and indicative of a gapstunt trick and a girl got pregnant just by ing deficit of scientific literacy (“the female watching my extremeness to the maxxxx. body has ways to try to shut down that whole thing”), compassion and tact.

What’s your best pickup venue?

Fenner, in fact I can’t remember the last time I picked up outside of Fenner.

Tell us about your training in traditional Eastern Medicine?

I don’t have a lot of practical eastern medical training per se, however the time I ate a fetus and didn’t get sick was pretty cool.

Remember then that these words are not the words of a fringe-type extremist, but an elected member of Congress and the chosen Republican nominee for the Missouri Senate seat. Akin is not alone in his views; he is very much a part of the mainstream Republican establishment. He has not said anything divergent from the Republican groupthink.

It being election season, Romney and the Republican power players have gone through the motions of disapproval, by publicly condemning Akin and calling for him to withdraw from his Senate race. Akin has steadfastly refused to do so, but he did agree to stay away from the Republican National Convention. But really, it was not so much what he said, but rather how he said it. Other Republicans just prefer to speak through their legislative efforts.

Indeed, it’s not hard not to be cynical about the motivations of the Republican Party in their denunciations when their official platform since 2004 has been a complete and unequivocal ban on abortions, even for victims of rape. Romney’s running mate Paul Ryan and Todd Akin were co-sponsors of the No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act, which

originally tried to alter the definition of rape to “forcible rape”.

Akin’s remarks have taken on far greater, and probably longer-lasting, significance than the offensive ramblings of a single Republican Congressman. The “legitimate rape” comment has become politically toxic for the Republicans, evidenced in their mad scramble to distance themselves from it, the intense media coverage and scrutiny and the swift backlash from critics in the media and political left. While Romney and Co. may try to characterise Akin as an outlier and his views as out of step with the rest of the Party’s, Akin is symbolic of deeper issues within the Republican Party. He is yet another canary in the coalmine for the extremism which has taken root among the Republicans.

It’s clear that the dignity of their Party rather than the dignity of women is the foremost concern for Republicans in light of this story. Too bad then that Akin’s remarks have opened a can of worms for the Republicans and shone a spotlight on their discourse about rape, abortion and women, putting in doubt their ability to uphold either.

Tommie Smith as they gave the Black Power salute.

To us university students in the twenty-first century this may not seem like a big deal. But to some what Norman did was not in support of equal civil rights, but in support of a violent and possibly unjustified movement. For them, no Australian should be seen to support such people.

In the AOC’s view, Norman had clearly breached the Olympic Charter, which bans demonstrations of racial propaganda from Olympic venues. He had been warned by the Chef de Mission Julius Patching to be careful with his public statements yet had persisted with wearing the badge.

Although he was allowed to run at the 1970 Commonwealth Games, Norman was overlooked by the AOC for the 1972 Munich Olympics despite running the qualifying times for the 200m and 100m a total of 13 times. He quit athletics shortly after.

However, the biggest injustice by the AOC came in 2000. It refused to allow Norman

to walk in the parade of former Olympians at the Opening Ceremony of the Sydney Olympics. The group of athletes was cheered on by thousands as they took their lap of honour around the stadium. But not Peter Norman. In the end, Norman was actually invited to the event by the American team, who saw him as a hero.

While the motion to give a formal apology to the family of Peter Norman last week is a big step forward in rewriting the history of Australian sport, the organisation that caused him the most pain is still yet to right its wrong. The AOC needs to admit that while they may have viewed Norman’s act as a breach of Olympic code at the time, it was indeed a morally right act for which he deserves recognition. In its staunch denial of shunning Peter Norman, the AOC continues to deny him the status he deserves: legend of the athletics track who bravely stood up for what he believed in – equal rights for every human being.

Sorry Still the Hardest Word for AOC ROHANA PRINCE

Peter Norman should be regarded as a sporting legend in this country. He should be up with the likes of Donald Bradman, Kieran Perkins and Cathy Freeman. He should be on coins, in school textbooks and spoken about on Australia Day. But he’s not.

The Australian Olympic Committee (AOC) has removed Peter Norman from Australian history books and will continue to do so with its refusal to support the Parliamentary apology moved by Member for Fraser Andrew Leigh earlier last week.

Why? Well that’s something members of the Norman family and indeed a great many others are still wondering.

At the 1968 Mexico Olympics, Peter Norman came second in the 200m final, running a time that still stands as the Australian record. He stood on the podium, wearing a badge supporting equal civil rights, beside African-American athletes John Carlos and

HACK SEASON 2012

A Virgin Hack’s Insight

HACK SEASON 2012

We were all tired, sunburnt, soaking wet and sick of the sound of our own voices, but somehow it felt genuinely worth it.

As the clock hit 4.30 and the polls closed, there was a bittersweet sense in the air.

A mixture of anticipation and exhaustion amongst all the candidates and campaigners, this year’s ANU Students’ Association (ANUSA) election was def-

eral occasions throughout, Hack Week was my first foray as a candidate into student politics. Though it seems to many to be a glorified popularity contest, you only need think of the amount of money these organisations control. Every student contributes to the over one million dollars of operating income ANUSA has in the bank and through this money, every student in the country contributes to the National Union of Students. Further, the amount of representation ANUSA makes to the university on our behalf would make it easy for any student to realise why representatives often have to drop courses along the way.

However, all things considered, there is definitely an element of ridiculousness to these elections. This became evident when a probity officer came storming up Union Court, beer in hand, after one candidate complained of another pushing him. It was disturbingly reminiscent of a father lashing out at a couple of five-year-old kids. Furthermore, the odd obsession with ensuring no-one crosses the thick, yellow chalk line continued the primary school flashbacks, not to mention the smirking faces whenever you walked a voter across the line.

And that’s not even considering the upfront persona that every campaigner must adopt. One might think O-Week would have prepared you in being somewhat forward in approaching strangers. However, this is not the case. Nothing could prepare you for the chirpy forwardness and aggressive interruption of other candidates to ensure your side is

heard. Though my conscience may have been loudly dissenting, the flood of campaigners upon innocent students was as fear inducing as the seagull scene from Finding Nemo. Regardless, the look of sheer dread in their eyes was not enough to dissuade.

There was an element of sophistication in the bickering however. Tempers flew over budget scrutiny and there were several arguments over the intricacies of policy implementation. However, this intellectualisation failed to appeal to the voters. Depressingly, the only erudite debate to be had was between the actual campaigners themselves.

Although there were a few glimmers of hope with the odd voter endeavouring to be properly informed, it slowly became clear that all that was needed were colourful shirts to capture potential voters.

All things considered, however, there was not a single insincere candidate in the field.

Though a superficial argument was put to voters as they passed through Union Court, there was a genuine sense that every person was doing it in a belief that they could do something for students and the Students’ Association. That should at least provide some form of comfort to the minority of students, the mere 1,350 of you, who actually voted in this year’s election.

So next year when you’re passing through Union Court, don’t just vote for the team with the brightest colours and the best looking Facebook photos. Take the time and consider, even for a minute, which of the tickets you want to vote for. Though they may seem like schoolchildren bickering and bantering in the pouring rain, I’ll personally vouch for the goodwill of the students standing out there working for your vote. After all, with my newfound title of “hack”, I’ll probably be one of them.

HACK SEASON 2012

Arts Students OverRepesented in ANUSA DANIEL FILAN

RILEY BOUGHTON

initely a rollercoaster of a week.

Despite being labelled a hack on s e v -

HACK SEASON 2012

COMMENT//5

While perusing the latest Hack Week edition of Woroni, one of the statements of a candidate for the position of Arts Faculty Representative caught my eye: “That the arts student body is wide-spread and under represented is . . . well-known”. This is so blatantly false as to be hilarious. According to ANU’s 2011 Annual Report, 29% of equivalent full-time student loads are performed under the College of Arts and Social Sciences (CASS). Despite arts students only comprising about one third of the student populace, two thirds of the outgoing ANU Students’ Association (ANUSA) executive study at least one arts degree. Similarly, about two thirds of the various tickets’ candidates for executive positions are enrolled in at least one degree administered

by CASS. If you wish to find a member of a cohort that actually is widespread and under-represented, look no further than your nearest science or engineering student. Approximately one third of equivalent full-time study loads are performed under the Science or Engineering faculties, slightly more than do Arts. Out of the 20 candidates for the 2013 ANUSA executive, only one is studying a science degree, and none engineering. Emblematic of the ridiculous lack of involvement of science students in ANUSA was this year’s ballot paper, which described a representative for the “College of Physical Sciences”. No such college exists – it is in fact the College of Physical and Mathematical Sciences (CPMS), as any visit to the ANU website could confirm. This is the sort of obvious mistake that, while harmless, could only be made in the absence of any student of physics or maths.

How did this situation occur? Ticket formation at ANU is done in such a way that the only people who end up on tickets are those in the social groups of the student politicos. These end up being mostly arts and law students, barring one finance/actuarial student to be treasurer, and a few others to

fill up the faculty representative candidacies.

Science and engineering students will never be invited to a ticket except as a token fac rep, and may not even be aware that ANUSA elections are looming until we are accosted by candidates during the week of the elections.

They look at the situation and realise that ANU’s political class does not intersect with their own. Given this chasm between their own world and that of student politics, these students inevitably become apathetic and fail to vote. In this way, the problem self-perpetuates. Science and engineering students don’t vote, so when forming tickets, winning the votes of arts students - the people who actually choose who governs ANUSA - is prioritised. This is done by filling tickets with arts students, who will hopefully get votes from their arts student friends. Consequently, science and engineering students neither feature on tickets nor know any candidates, and so their disconnect with student politics only deepens.

This issue – which also significantly affects international students and those who do not live on campus – causes more problems than inhibiting the affected students’ abilities to kick off a career in politics. It leads to an ANUSA dominated by a narrow demographic, and a lack of diverse perspectives on the varied challenges that it has to face. It also means that ANUSA is necessarily less responsive to the concerns of these students, as tickets do not need to seriously consider the needs of students who don’t vote when drafting their policies – another vicious cycle driving disengagement.

The next question is this: how can we make ANUSA more representative of the full diversity of students? Alas, the nature of vicious cycles is that they are not simple to escape from. Tickets may try to reach out to the affected groups, but in the face of a swathe of the student population who believe that student politics has nothing to offer them, I fear that government of the domestic campusdwelling arts students, by the domestic campus-dwelling arts students, for the domestic campus-dwelling arts students, shall not perish from the ANU.

Science and engineering students don’t vote, so when forming tickets, winning the votes of arts students - the people who actually choose who governs ANUSA is prioritised.

Illustrations // Hannah Winter-Dewhirst

COMMENT// 6

Voltaire’s Nightmare: Pussy Riot and the Hypocrisy of Free Speech

While we’re willing to back Pussy Riot’s antics, Lev Bronshtein argues we should be aware that free speech swings both ways

“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it” is a political maxim oft called upon in robust democratic debate. Yet the furore over the jailing of three Pussy Riot members demonstrates the selectivity in how the West and its Russian liberal allies promote free speech. Support for free speech nowadays largely depends on sufficient numbers of people agreeing with a political message, rather than actually allowing open discourse.

Chancellor Merkel, heading a country with its own draconian speech laws, argued the sentence “calls into question Russia’s commitment to protect... fundamental rights and freedoms”. Amnesty International, which ironically claims to promote respect for the religious traditions Pussy Riot trampled on, declared them “prisoners of conscience”. David Cameron, the US State Department and Madonna formed just part of a wider chorus condemning the jailing.

People claiming to fighting for liberal values immediately magnetise our support for almost all their actions, despite their sometimes questionable antics used for publicity.

In reverse, non-violent campaigns for social assimilation, reductions in immigration or other taboo issues can lead to a prison sentence. Before we claim the moral highground and condemn Russia, we need to reflect on the curtailment of free speech in liberal-minded societies.

The entire world reacted strongly last year when US evangelical Terry Jones publicly burnt the Koran. But in Kiev last week, a topless Pussy Riot sympathiserʼs destruction of a Cross commemorating victims of Stalinism drew scarce condemnation at all. It’s hate for conservative Christians to burn the Koran, but we’re nonplussed to see young feminists desecrating religious memorials for genocide victims. Why? Geert Wilders, the popular Dutch farrightist, found himself prosecuted for comparing the Koran to Mein Kampf. A hardly fantastical stance given the language of the Bible and Koran, his plight illustrates how legal problems abound for those challenging politically correctness. While many still consider his assertion hate speech, the West deems Pussy Riot singing an altar-side prayer

parody, “Holy, holy shit of God”, peaceful freedom of expression.

Prosecutions for racist verbal abuse, especially in Britain, give a more everyday insight into uneven free speech restrictions. A black woman is now under investigation for an anti-Caucasian tirade; typically the trend is drunken white women filmed abusing Subcontinental and African Tube passengers. One offender, Jacqueline Woodhouse, copped 21 weeks in jail. London knife crime incidents, by contrast, can attract suspended sentences. Joining them are recent cases of Olympics spectators arrested for disparaging athletes or their families. If a former cradle of liberalism wants to regularly imprison people for offensive language, however tasteless, we cannot defend a band for comparably abusing a religionʼs freedom to worship in peace.

Common justifications for Pussy Riotʼs right to freedom of expression are untenable and self-serving at best. This is because a defence of their stunt also necessitates similar defences for countless non-liberals and non-feminists pursued under comparable Western laws. After all, the band members

The Tory Trojan Horse LUKE MANSILLO

Worries afoot for undergraduate domestic students surrounding the lack of any official higher education policy that a potential Abbott government may implement. News Ltd reported recently that the Coalition would inflict a 25% increase on HECS fees and would also cap universities places. This was quickly denied, and was followed by a statement explaining that the Coalition is undergoing “policy development.”

This is something rather surprising to me.

Not the response, not the report, but haven’t 72 MPs and 34 Senators had five years in Opposition to come up with an alternative policy or to endorse to the government’s education policy? And if they were thinking about changing their policy shouldn’t they have been consulting with interested parties such as the National Union of Students?

Presuming the News Ltd reports were fabricated, what have the 106 Coalition members on the Hill been up to? For five years it they seemed to have forgotten about publicly articulating a platform. Unless it is a part of their strategy to avoid policy analysis in political conversation until the November 2013 election.

I suspect the Opposition’s strategy is similar to the LNP’s election strategy for the last Queensland election and Howard’s Work Choices strategy. In the case of Howard: don’t mention the idea of industrial relation reforms until three weeks after the election and the government controls both chambers. As for Newman: Firstly, claim in February that there would be 20,000 additional public sector jobs created.Secondly, once elected in March hold a Peter Costello audit of the budget to find out how bad things are.

Thirdlyclaim the budget deficit is uncontrollable making Queensland “the Spain of Aus-

tralia”.Finally, cut government services and over 20,000 jobs under the auspice of a fiscal emergency. Last week the Courier Mail reported the LNP found $35 billion in their budget tucked under the lounge; halving Costello’s audit figures.

The News Ltd report most likely has some credence. Christopher Pyne mentioned in his denials that the Coalition wanted to bring back full-fee options for domestic students. To find out what the Coalition’s current policy is, I called Pyne’s office, only to be redirected to Brett Mason’s office who were unable to state or confirm any policy for the LNP at present.

This is a worrying prospect higher education. Abbott already refers to himself as the presumptive future Prime Minister; yet his party cannot tell anyone what is will do regarding higher education. Given the recent history of federal and state Liberal government policy disclosure and implementation

intruded into the most sacred part of Christ the Saviour Cathedral. Their words may have been intended to target Patriarch Kirill, a Putin supporter, but they deliberately profaned a liturgy holy to 125 million Russian Orthodox Christians. Moreover, if their ideology had been Stalinism, no Westerner would have blinked over their jailing, let alone rallied against it. Western society cares because they are feminist and anti-Putin, not because of any inalienable right to freedom of expression.

Should society feel compelled to impose prison terms on controversial figures while it backs Pussy Riot, it should not pretend to be furthering free speech. It is instead butchering the term, endorsing narrows conceptions of acceptability in public discourse. Nonetheless, the argument here is not for uninhibited freedom of expression. Calls to violence and clear forms of defamation mark the end of a right to say what one wishes.

To invoke free speech, we actually have to consistently affirm our belief in it. Our ideologically selective interpretations are only making Voltaire shudder in his grave.

practises concern is warranted.

To quote Donald Rumsfeld: “There are known knowns; there are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns; ... things ... we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns – there are things we do not know, we don’t know.”

We know the Libs do not have a public policy.

We do not know what that policy will be if and when Abbott is Prime Minister.

We know the Libs are planning something and one unhappy faction is leaking to News Ltd the products of policy development.

We know the UK increasing university fees has resulted in a 8.7% drop in enrolments, mostly from minorities and those from lower socio-economic backgrounds.

An unknown unknown is that we do not know if Australia will embrace Abbott’s mystique at the polls when we know nothing about his policies.

COMMENT//7

Simplicity is so Mainstream ARVIND KUHLA

‘Fair and Equal’ Internships Mean Internships for All Gareth Robinson responds to calls for journalism internships to be restricted to J-School graduates only

In a recent article for ABC’s The Drum opinion site, UTS journalism academic Jenna Price wrote about how students seeking journalism internships should be limited to those who have had an “education which makes you vocationally ready.” Price was responding to an article in the University of Melbourne’s student newspaper Farrago by Sasha Burden, who interned at the Herald Sun and found the experience so horrific she is now seriously questioning a career in journalism.

Price’s argument is that Burden’s broad communications degree left her ill-prepared.

Price may be right, but why does being prepared for the newsroom culture depend so heavily on having a vocational journalism degree? According to Price, students should be academically prepared for internships in the media through mentorship and classroom-based learning of workplace culture.

However, such an understanding can equally be developed outside academia through student-led practical programs.

University-funded student media is the best way of acquainting yourself with the ins and outs of the media industry by getting involved in the processes of sourcing content, writing, editing and publishing. Admittedly, funding and time constraints limit the scale of most student media outlets but no more so than being stuck in a classroom learning about the managerial structure of News Limited.

The problem is that, given the insular nature of the media industry, journalism academics look down on this type of extracurricular experience with scepticism. As a section editor of this fine publication, I am

continually frustrated by the barriers we run into when considering applying for internships with major news outlets or submitting material for competitions such as the Walkley Student Journalism Award. None of us is studying a journalism degree but many have an overwhelming interest in a potential fu-

Rock… [is] inseparably linked with political struggles, from the civil rights movement in sixties America, through Rock Against Racism in seventies Britain to Live 8 in more recent years. ture in the media industry.

Given the extraordinary diversity and scope of the modern-day media it seems illogical that many media internships are only open to communications students. For instance, if a student studying a science degree who has been involved in student media, writing articles for a small scientific news site and on their own blog, tries to apply for a position at The Sydney Morning Herald, chances are they will be turned away. This makes even less sense considering the vacuum of expert journalists on science issues.

By limiting internships to only journalism students the media industry squanders the

potential for innovation and diversity that has made it so attractive to an array of public figures, from Winston Churchill to Malcolm Turnbull. In fact, even many of Australia’s leading journalists (Mark Colvin, Bernard Keane and Annabel Crabb, to name just a few) do not have formal journalism qualifications. Of course, as media budgets get tighter, in-company journalism training becomes less of an imperative, making applicants with journalism degrees more highly desired.

However, this does not excuse discriminating against people who, while not having a communications degree, possess vast arrays of experience in the media and specialist knowledge in a particular field.

In many ways, what Price is advocating is for only students who have a very clear picture of what they want to do vocationally to apply for internships in journalism. This is counter-intuitive to the learning process. It doesn’t matter how many classroom briefings or mentoring sessions you have, nothing can fully prepare you for the workforce other than interning in it. If students have a keen interest and a determination to make a career in journalism then an internship will enrich their professional development whether they are communication students or not. On the other hand, if they dislike the experience then they can take their lives in another direction.

Chances are, if they have studied something other than communications, they will have a much easier time finding an alternative job.

You can follow Gareth on Twitter @gar_rob.

“How could movements of deterritorialization and processes of reterritorialization not be relative, always connected, caught up in one another?” asks a popular philosophical text of 1987. What does this mean? Perhaps deterritorialization refers to taking apart territories, and reterritorialization is putting them back together. Or is it just nonsense? I certainly cannot tell.

In my time reading the work of other students, I now know that students believe the best defence is an overdeveloped vocabulary.

I see words marked as deceased in the Oxford English Dictionary liberally sprinkled across pages, huge numbers of subordinate clauses that would make Edward Gibbon pause, and syntax that is beyond poetic. Why do students write in such a complicated way?

Perhaps it is the readings they are assigned.

Readings, especially those in arts courses, often contain language that is impenetrable to the average first year (see example above).

Students are conditioned to copy this ‘academic’ style in their own writing. We are told “don’t use colloquial language”, “don’t use spoken styles” and perhaps paradoxically “don’t use contractions”. Why should a text that is seeking to explain some aspect of existence (which is what all the work we do has in common) try so deliberately to obscure its message?

There is hope, however. A prominent semanticist at ANU has spent most of her career advocating simple language. She claims that academic language is “bird-speak”, indistinguishable from the sound of chirping birds, and asks us all to try and express our ideas in simple language. This is not as easy as it may seem, mostly because people don’t always know what they are talking about to begin with. The student who writes “the text reveals a range of multiplicities through its idiosyncratic discursive techniques” might actually have to say, in words of one or two syllables, what they mean when they say “multiplicity” or “discursive techniques”.

However, these words may have already lost their meaning to become Don Watson’s “weasel words” - words that through overuse in inappropriate senses have become shells, losing their signifying power.

So for your next essay, try some simple language. Try writing at least one sentence without a subordinate clause. We deal in difficult concepts at university – it makes sense to talk about them in a simple way.

COMMENT// 8

HACK SEASON 2012

IN THE LAB

ANUSA Election Results

The final election results are below:

ELEANOR CAMPBELL

Men on Pills

Hormonal contraceptive pills for women have been on the market since the 1960s, but gentlemen might soon have the option to “go on the pill” thanks to the development of a birth control drug targeted at men.

Female contraceptive pills are big business. In 2009, the hormonal contraceptive industry was worth just over US$11 billion globally, and that value is expected to rise to US$15 billion by 2016. These pills typically manipulate female hormones, making impregnation less likely or convincing the body that the taker of the drug is already pregnant. In fact, the initial development of the female hormonal pill involved transplanting the ovaries of already-pregnant mice into their pregnancy-free sisters. Luckily, increased understanding of the chemical make-up of human bodies has rendered contraception by ovary-transplant unnecessary.

Until recently, pill-based contraception has been a female game, but new research into the Bromodomain testis-specific protein, or BRDT, has opened a door to the potential development of a male birth control pill that doesn’t rely on hormone manipulation.

A drug called JQ1 has been found to inhibit the normal function of BRDT, which is a key step in the production of active sperm. Trials in mice have yielded promising results. Male mice taking JQ1 had a notably lower sperm-count; their normal mating habits were not disturbed (which is a scientific way of saying they didn’t lose their libidos), but they remained effectively infertile while being given the drug.

One of the biggest concerns when developing any form of non-barrier contraception is reversibility. Trials with JQ1 have shown male mice who were taken off the drug return to normal levels of fertility, producing healthy offspring and fulfilling their dreams of mouse fatherhood.

There seem to be no negative side-effects of JQ1 except for a slight decrease in the size of JQ1 takers’ testes. Human trials are potentially not far off. Given that there have been no large, marketable developments in male contraceptive since the invention of the condom centuries ago, a human version of JQ1 is definitely an interesting avenue for exploration, from the perspectives of both science and gender studies.

Each edition, the best letter to the editor will win a $25 voucher to eat and drink at Two Before Ten Roasters!

Send letters to contact@woroni.com.au Keen Libertarianism Out of It The US Republican Party has many problems. Being “hardline libertarian”, as Thomas Goldie suggests (“Dark Side of American Politics”, No.10 Vol 64, August 20), is not one of them. I know this because I am a libertarian, and anyone who has read anything about libertarianism, ever, knows there’s been nothing libertarian about the GOP since Goldwater. I appreciate that Thomas’s article is about a phenomenon, the cause or justification for which is not extremely relevant to the point he’s trying to make, but being one of the people on this campus who is neither progressive nor conservative, I have to defend libertarianism.

US Republicans went into Iraq and Afghanistan. Libertarians don’t think the government can properly run the post office down the road, let alone a foreign country thousands of kilometres away. We believe that genuine free markets thrive on true competition, which doesn’t happen when you have bailouts. The Trouble Asset Relief Program (TARP), which many Republicans, including self-proclaimed Ayn Rand devotee Paul Ryan, voted for, is not libertarian.

Wanting to build a fence along the Mexican border? Not libertarian. The PATRIOT Act? Not libertarian.

Thomas is right that the Republicans are playing wedge politics. But it’s regular, oldfashioned, populist-conservative wedge politics. Libertarianism’s got nothing to do with it.

Trisha Jha

Letter of the week

Election Coverage Kudos Hi Woroni Editor(s), I’m the Managing Editor of the DU Clarion and I just wanted to commend you on your recent coverage of the ANUSA elections. It was awesome. Actually, it was super awesome.

I attended ANU a year ago and the Woroni has really grown since, congrats!

I also like your new website(I’m currently moving the DU Clarion to wordpress too, it should be up in a week or so).

Uni hasn’t started for us yet, but I hope I do as well as you guys!

Manthan Bhatt

Sir,

Once a Hack, Always a Hack

I write in regard to your recent online article, “Students See Pink As Common Thread Ties Up ANUSA Elections”, in which your “journalist” Cam Wilson (who, as far as I can make out, has some alleged editorial connection nowadays to this once-respected journal) mistakenly asserts that the 2010 elections for the ANU Students’ Association “did not have any major competing tickets”. By this, I assume he means to say that the ticket which eventually won almost all positions (Leah Ginnivan and Brody Warren’s mouldcoloured “Engage” ticket) had no electoral rivals. This is incorrect. Engage squared off against two other tickets: Hack! and Left Action. As convenor and Presidential candidate on the Hack! ticket, I would like to reject emphatically the completely unhistorical notion that we were not a “major competing ticket”.

The last of the great idealistic ANUSA tickets, Hack! ran on a values-based platform of devious factional chiselling, meretricious sloganeering and electoral fraud.

Since our sad defeat, I have watched tickets come and I have watched them go, each pretending to be slightly more independent than the last. What does this even mean?

Independent from what? This year, three tickets tried to claim the label for themselves. Rob Oakeshott is an “independent”, and everyone knows that he is just Juliar’s lackey in the takeover of our once great nation Australia by fluoridating World Government types, and anyway, judging by his current polling, Mr Oakeshott would lose the next election to the corpse of Idi Amin, so what’s the point of your precious independence, anyway? I myself never hid the fact that I was connected to (in no particular order) the the International Spartacist Tendency, the Scottish Independence Party, the al-Aqsa Martyrs’ Brigade, and the Australian Young Liberals. And why be ashamed of it? It is precisely this mélange of political networking, sexually-charged conferencing and shameless dishonesty that makes the National Union of Students such an effective and functional organisation.

An apology would be appreciated, and probably ignored.

Yours acrimoniously, Thomas Westland Presidential Candidate and Convenor,

Executive President– Aleks Sladojevic (Common Thread) Vice President – Tas Vaughan (Common Thread) General Secretary – Sophia Stanley (Common Thread) Social Officer – Liv Clark (Common Thread) Treasurer – Shan Verne Liew (Common Thread) Education Officer – Amy MacKinnon (Common Thread) Collective Officers (elected unopposed) Queer* Officer – Stuart Ferrie (independent) Environment Officer – Leila Alexandra (Students of Sustainability) Women’s Officer – Beth Ritchie (Independent) International Students’ Officer – Muhammad Taufiq bin Suraidi (Independent) Indigenous Officer – Brogan Goode (Independent) Disabilities Officer – Louise Stockton (Independent) Faculty Representatives College of Arts and Social Sciences – Casey White (The Front Row Ticket) and Ruohan Zhao (Common Thread) College of Asia and the Pacific – Nick Horton (A Naked ANUSA) and Ashleigh Ralph (Common Thread) College of Business and Economics – Charles Carroll (Common Thread) and Jennifer Darmody (Common Thread) College of Engineering and Computer Science – Sanjay Govindan (Common Thread) and Caroline Skinner (Common Thread) College of Law – Kelly Krisofferson (Common Thread) and Antonija Kurbalija (Common Thread) College of Physical Sciences / College of Medicine, Biology and Environment – Zaiga Thomann (Common Thread) and Ellen Rykers (Common Thread) General Representatives (in order of votes) Eric Chan (Common Thread) Vincci Lee (Common Thread) Jedda Elliot (Common Thread) Michael Harrison (Common Thread) Lucy McFarlane (Common Thread) Alexandra Davis (Front Row Ticket) Stacey Little (A Naked ANUSA) Jess Bolton (Common Thread) Mark Jehne (Common Thread) Karan Savara (Front Row Ticket) Milly Cooper (A Naked ANUSA) Mark Rowe (Front Row Ticket) Toby Moffatt (Front Row Ticket) Nick Horton (A Naked ANUSA) National Union of Students Tim Lamusse (The Front Row Ticket) Alice Wade (Strong Unions Need Women) Ben Duggan (Centre Unity) Matilda Gillis (The Front Row Ticket) Tom Nock (Independent)

9

in order to get me to Heaven. I realised how believe that God is powerful to save people. much of a sacrifice he’d made, and how loved So would you call what you do ‘preachWell, I grew up in Canberra. On the south I was. And all of a sudden it hit me that everying’?

Would that be an appropriate word to thing I look at was actually made by a person. side. My parents are both followers of Jesus. I describe it?

And I am loved by him!

I realised that I have have two brothers and a sister and they follow everything I need.

The person that controls Jesus as well.

Well, preaching is something I would use everything loves me. I am cared for. to describe any time where you’re speaking So from childhood you’ve had a very reliabout Jesus or speaking about his message Do you go to church at all? gious upbringing? or the word of God. So in one sense, yes. But It’s tricky language talking about church, when I’m reading the bible I just call it readI wouldn’t say religious in the sense of ritbecause the way it’s used in modern western ing. ual or following a certain moral way of livAnd do people ever react negatively to culture is different to the way it was used in ing, but religious in a sense of having a cerwhat you’re doing? It’s quite a contentious the first century.

Church was understood as tain kind of worldview. My Dad in particular topic so there are always going to be people knows the bible really well and upholds Jesus who disagree with you. Do they ever voice Christ. I grew up with Jesus being genuinely their disapproval? understood as the king of the world. I grew up with an understanding that Jesus was acPeople say just go back to a church, take it tually what life was about, and he was what off campus. A lot of people are just angry at really gave life meaning. But it’s funny that God. A lot of the time people will approach growing up I was still just really a fake. me with some intellectual stumbling block that they can’t accept. Then what they’ll do is When you say ‘religious’, are you referjust start talking about a loved one of theirs ring to the particular type of religion that who died, and they’re just upset about it. you identify with? Like Anglican or ProtesThey’re just angry. Behind it is a sense of can tant…?

I trust him? Can I trust God? It’s relieving. It’s refreshing when people are real like that.

Just a follower of Jesus. I believe that what we have in the Bible is sixty-six ancient manSo how do you cope with that? When peouscripts. It’s quite miraculous the way it is a community of people who were united with ple criticise something that you’re passionthis common following of Jesus, whereas toso consistent even though it’s written by all ate about, something that you’ve built your day a lot of the time church is just this activthese different people from all these different life around?

Is it difficult? ity that you do once a week.

So I have this times and languages. It just impresses upon incredible relationship with all these other me the bible’s absolute divinity. As a child I I find it really sad. I don’t feel any bitterness was taught from the bible, what it said about people following Jesus as well. It’s a relationor anger towards them because I was exactly ship that’s always there.

Jesus and about history and about God and the same. Most people don’t understand what humanity.

What do you do at the University. Almost Jesus is actually like. I just feel so sad that there’s an enmity in people towards someone And was there a particular moment when every Thursday I see you at Union Court. who is so lovely. But I expect people to opyou decided to follow Jesus, or was it a pose it. It’s like what Jesus said; they’ll hate I’ll just go up to people and ask them if gradual realisation from the days of your you because they hated me first. they’re interested in Jesus.

If they’re interchildhood? ested in having a conversation. Often there’s Tell us about your degree at the ANU. Do It wasn’t until I was about fourteen that I someone who’s interested in discussing what you feel that your studies complement your he’s about, or just understanding a bit more realised that Jesus is actually a real person. beliefs or more often contradict them? about the bible.

And he actually died. I think, in my memory, there was a point where I was just really It’s interesting, actually. Studying philosoAnother thing I do is just stand up and struck by the love of God. Someone had just phy, what I found so far is that it has really read out from the gospels, and who knows? explained to me about Jesus in a way that I’d vindicated everything I believe. One example There’s one promise in the book of Isaiah that heard many times before but just hadn’t unof that is the idea of faith. What I realise is that talks about the word of God being like dew derstood in that way. I broke down and was everyone believes something. Everyone has a from Heaven.

In the same way that the dew very overwhelmed. will fall down and cause plants to grow out worldview. Everyone has some sort of answer Until this point in your life Jesus had just of the ground, the words he sends out don’t to the questions of, ‘Where did I come from? return empty. There’s this sense that when- Why am I here? Where am I going? What is been an abstract idea? ever the word of God is heard, God is achiev- life all about?’ What I’m finding is that every Suddenly I no longer understood Jesus as a ing something. Ultimately I believe that this worldview has a leap of faith behind it. But utility. He was no longer just what God used world is owned by God and he deserves to be not everyone thinks about it. recognised. My words can’t do anything but I First off, tell us a bit about yourself.

I find it really sad. I don’t feel any bitterness or anger towards them because I was exactly the same. Most people don’t understand what Jesus is actually like.

Profile: Ben Irving Ever wondered about the guy who reads the Bible aloud in Union Court?

Ben Latham found out more about his faith, philosophy and coping with criticism.

Murder on the Orient Express

The mystery surrounding the murder of a British businessman has sparked concerns about the transparency of China’s justice system, says Brendan Forde.

One of the most sensational and scrutinised trials in recent years in China is over.

Gu Kailai, accomplished lawyer, wife of former Chongqing Party Secretary Bo Xilai, was found guilty of “intentional homicide” of British businessman Neil Heywood, receiving a suspended death sentence.

When Neil Heywood died in Chongqing on 14th November 2011 the world took little notice. An ambiguous figure with links (financial and otherwise) to Bo and Gu, Heywood had kept a low profile. An initial official investigation into his death found that Heywood had died from excessive consumption of alcohol. While the explanation for his death was far from convincing (friends report that he was not a heavy drinker) circumstances placed the death in a different context (friends had also reported that he had fallen out with Gu and had been “summoned” to Chongqing). Heywood’s family remained silent. His Chinese wife and two children stayed in Beijing; their security providing a strong disincentive to open questioning of the official explanation of Heywood’s death.

The case was not left there. On 26th March 2012, a few weeks after Bo had been dramatically removed from office, the British Government announced that it had officially asked China to reopen the investigation into Heywood’s death. This may have been in re-

sponse to rumours about Gu and Heywood.

By then Chinese microblogs were awash with rumours that Gu had murdered Heywood.

On 10th April, the same day that Bo was suspended from the Politburo, authorities announced that Gu and an aide, Zhang Xiaojun, were chief suspects in the case. Another foreigner with connections to Gu, Frenchman Patrick Devillers, was detained in Cambodia, later travelling to China on 18th July as a witness in the investigation.

Devillers had substantial business links to Gu. On 26th July it was announced that Gu and Zhang had been formally charged with the murder of Heywood. State media commentaries on the matter called the evidence against them “irrefutable”. On 9th August, the trial began in the Hefei City Intermediate People’s Court, Anhui Province. The location for the trial is interesting: Hefei is over 900 kilometres south of Beijing and the courtrooms are compact. In such an obscure location the significance of the trial was effectively downplayed with the size of the courts denying access to members of the foreign media. In the

end the trial was over in eight hours. No witnesses gave testimony (although this is not uncommon in the Chinese legal system) and Gu, apart from quibbling over a few details, accepted responsibility for the murder. The court heard that Heywood had threatened Gu’s son, so she got him drunk, then poured poison into his mouth.

By presenting the circumstances along these lines Gu is cast in almost sympathetic light by the authorities. She acted only to protect her son. On 20th August Gu was sentenced to death with a two year reprieve. This is effectively a suspended sentence, meaning she will likely spend a considerable amount of time in prison. Zhang received a nine year sentence for aiding the murder. Along with the prison sentence Gu was permanently stripped of her political rights, preventing her from joining a political party, voting or standing for election for the rest of her life. Ironically, Gu has received the same punishment as Mao Zedong’s widow Jiang Qing who was put on trial at the end of the Cultural Revolution. The entire process received coverage from the Chinese

Along with the prison sentence Gu was permanently stripped of her political rights, preventing her from joining a political party, voting or standing for election for the rest of her life.

media, but any direct association of Gu with Bo was assiduously avoided. His role as her husband was constantly reemphasised each time her name was mentioned. In mainland China married women typically do not adopt their husband’s surname. But Chinese media reports refer to her not as Gu, but as Bogu, combining her surname with Bo’s. While this is common in Hong Kong it is extremely rare on the mainland. Its use is one of the more puzzling aspects of the case. It is likely an attempt by the regime to subtly associate Bo with the murder conviction of his wife.

Ultimately, it is likely that Gu did indeed murder Heywood. The official story borders on the ridiculous. The full brief of evidence has not been released publicly; until it is, all we can do is speculate about details. Beyond the politics of the trial (and the lack of transparency in the Chinese justice system that it highlights) perhaps the most interesting feature to come out of the entire matter is the reaction of the Chinese people. Rumours have spread across the internet that Gu had been replaced by a body double, or that Neil Heywood never existed. On the whole, many have seen the trial with a great deal of cynicism. With the trial of his wife out of the way, we now await the fate of Bo Xilai.

The Forgotten Indian Soldiers of World War Two Our romantic view of World War Two should be tempered, and we ought to remember the human toll, argues Akshath Kale.

I had the privilege of visiting my country of origin during the mid-year break.

Until this year India was one of those far off reflections of a past that, in retrospect, seems somewhat embarrassing and even slightly humorous. Yet something told me that this trip was going to be a little more revelatory than I imagined. It then came with the news that my grandfather of 94 had passed away.

My mother and I had spent less than a week in New Delhi when we flew out to meet my father in Southern Maharashtra, my famh ily’s state of origin and my grandad’s final resting place. I wasn’t particularly close to my h grandfather. He visited off and on when I was in Delhi, but generally the stories about his experiences preceded the actual man.

He had been an officer in the army his en, tire career and had fought several wars. What s was most revealing though was his experie ence in the Second World War. We had all heard about it before, North Africa in 19411942 and then Burma in 1943 until the end in 1945. My grandfather enlisted in an army that had been unpopular with the Indian people for a century prior. He signed up for a war which didn’t (at the time) directly affect e the British Raj’s survival, against an enemy l he didn’t really know or hate. Yet he did so, along with 2.5 million other Indians.

India’s freedom struggle is well documented. Gandhi is a cliché that will be evoked in pieces of rhetoric and the power of non-vioe lence will be the topic of history and political science for years to come. Yet India fielded an all volunteer army that was sent to far flung corners of the world ranging from the Horn y of Africa to Singapore and Hong Kong. My Grandad was deployed to Egypt and took part in the Second Alamein Campaign, Churchill’s “end of the beginning”, in late 1942. Far from home these colonial soldiers fought the advancing Axis and contributed to the stem-

ming of Rommel and his Afrika Corps.

The Burma front of World War II is not as well-documented when compared to the Normandy Invasion or the Island Hopping campaigns in the Pacific. To this day General Slim’s XIV army is popularly known as the ‘Forgotten Army’ and the campaign is overall a forgotten tract of history. Yet men from the Commonwealth, America and Japan fought and died in conditions that cannot be fathomed in modern terms. Yellow fever, mosquitoes and constant rain, apart from bullets and artillery shells, were the day to day hazards of combat in Burma. Yet this is where the story abruptly stops. According to the history that I had learnt the Burma front was all but over by 1944. However, the Indian units (including my grandfather’s) went on to liberate Indochina and Malaya. My grandfather’s story ends less typically than this; he was pulled out of direct combat in 1944. This question lingered in the back of my mind for several days after we returned to Delhi. Then it struck me.

Combat stress or shellshock was an occurrence well noted in the wake of both World Wars, but remedies were hard to come by.

The stories of a valiant combatant fighting for something that was slowly slipping into history, is definitely romantic. But this war stress, not to mention general fatigue after 4 years of combat, must have cracked grandfather, like it did so many others. It certainly showed. Whatever I remember of my grandad was not the subject of typical warm and fuzzy stories. He was grim, bitter and angered very easily.

like all, possessed weaknesses and flaws. It must have been excruciating suffering from combat stress, particularly in a nation that didn’t have any warmth or respect for returning combatants. While Aussies, Kiwis, Americans and Englishmen returned home to parades and the antebellum, Indian soldiers were sometimes berated, beaten and abused by their fellow countrymen for serving “under the Raj’s colours”.

To this day India does not have a memorial to the 2.5 million who served overseas and the 87,000 who never made it home. For those who did it was usually a return to rural life, for others it was an opportunity to elevate oneself, for my grandfather the uniform remained on. Many of the Indian soldiers who served in World War II went on to serve in the Indian and Pakistani armies.

In an ironic and tragic twist of history former comrades in arms would have to face each other as adversaries as the First Kashmir War broke out in 1947. They say it is a mark of wisdom to acknowledge fear, and for all the clinical analyses that exist in today’s war history we tend to forget that it was men and women, with their fears and anxieties, that fought these wars. Perhaps that is how all recounts of war should end: not with a flurry of dispassion and objectivity but rather with It is challenging for one to come a simple reminder that all glories are but a to terms with one’s own weakseries of sparks and that legends are fleeting. ness. Perhaps at some visceral level, with all those stories and medals we forgot that my grandfather was essentially a human who,

Illustration // Dan Kim

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Rosie Goonan Fallen, 2012 cotton thread, found objects http://theragventure.blogspot.com.au/

LIFE & STYLE// 14

WORONI COMMUNITY NOTICEBOARD PERSIAN MOVIE NIGHT WHEN: 5pm, 5 September WHERE: Centre for Arab and Islamic Studies (CAIS) The ANU Persian Society is screening the 2009 internationally acclaimed AustralianIranian film ‘My Tehran for Sale’. Light refreshments will be served in the Centre for Arab and Islamic Studies (CAIS) Courtyard from 5pm. The film will begin at 5:30 in the CAIS lecture theatre and will run for 95 minutes. There will be English subtitles.

DOCUMENTARY: BIMBLEBOX WHEN: 5 – 7pm, 8 September WHERE: Haydon Allen Theatre, ANU Bimblebox draws attention to the issues surrounding the huge expansion of coal and coal seam gas mining in Eastern Australia.

This will be followed by a panel discussion, featuring: Sean Munro -Australian Student Environmental Network Shane Rattenbury ACT Greens MLA, Paola Cassoni - Co-owner Bimblebox Nature Refuge, Megan Evans Researcher, ANU, Rebecca Horridge - Climate Action Canberra.

GREAT GREEN DEBATE WHEN: Wed 3rd October, 7.30pm WHERE: Bruce Hall Should Coal Seam Gas play a larger role in Australia’s energy future? This year the Sustainability Learning Community’s Great Green Debate will be addressing this hotly contested issue. Come along to hear distinguished panelists argue their opinions on the economic opportunities and environmental risk of Coal Seam Gas in Australia.

CONTACT: slc@anu.edu.au

LIONS ORATORY COMPETITION WHEN: 6 – 8pm, 5 September WHERE: The Finkel Theatre, The John Curtin School of Medical Research, Garran Road Come along and watch ANU Students compete in the 18th Annual Lions Oratory Competition.

Each speaker has eight minutes to convince the judges and the audience that they deserve to win the ANU Lions Oratory trophy and prizes totalling $3,000 in cash, including the $400 People’s Choice Award.

Refreshments will be served after the event.

CONTACT: 6125 4144

Got something you want to tell people about? get your event on OUR noticeboard by sending a short spiel to contact@woroni.com.au

STUDY ANU G R A D U AT E L AW The key to successful career development is quality education.

We offer a range of programs: > ANU Juris Doctor (JD) > Graduate certificates in Australian Migration Law & Practice, and Environmental Law > Graduate diplomas, including Graduate Diploma in Legal Practice > Masters programs > Professional development courses > Research degrees (PhD, SJD, MPhil)

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Our specialist coursework study areas include Australian Migration Law; Environmental Law; Government & Commercial Law; International Law; International Security Law; and Law, Governance & Development.

You can also choose research degrees from a diverse range of legal areas.

LIFE & STYLE// 15

THE SEVEN SEAS

Eurotrip Tips KIERAN PENDER

By the time this issue of Woroni goes to print, I will have passed the half way mark on my seven month European adventure.

Instead of moaning about this fact (woe is me, only six months until university starts again...), I’ve put together some hard won travel tips from life on the road to help out anyone planning for a big trip this summer.

Less is More Sure, you want to see and do everything, but it really isn’t much fun spending every second day on the train. Two nights per city or town is probably a bare minimum, with three preferable unless the location only has one attraction. Possibly the best way to see a place properly, and really get a “feel” for any particular city, is to actually spend a week living there. Not only will you feel less like a tourist, but you will also not have to look worriedly at a map every five minutes.

Oh the horror! The hostels of darkness

You really don’t need that As obvious as it sounds, think very very hard about everything you want to bring. An LIZZIE ROWE extra kilogram here and there may not be The hostel hate list usually goes a little like noticeable while packing, but you will really this: feel it every time the hostel doesn’t have a lift 1. Snorers or you don’t have change for the bus. Unless 2.

‘Gap Yah’ 4am vomiters you’re going to the middle of nowhere (Tug3.

People who sleep with their eyes geranong doesn’t count), you will be able to open find just about anything in the strange foreign 4.

Possible murderers shops, so don’t pack for every eventuality.

Number four comes from recent films about disastrous European travels that Getting from A to B Catching the train/bus/boat from point have dominated the horror genre. While A to point B is usually simple enough, es- Hostel scenes of brutal torture, sex and pecially compared to Australia’s rather dis- gore undoubtedly churned the ol’ stommal public transport system. Nevertheless, ach, several weeks in Eastern European making sure everything lines up can be a hostels surprisingly never left me waking nightmare, especially given the numerous up to a scar on my abdomen and my ordifferent organisations and companies in- gans in a bucket of ice beside the bunk bed.

Well accustomed to questionable acvolved in these things. For example, given commodation all over the continent, it a fast train runs between Milan and Paris, shocks you and me both to discover that it seems logical that you could buy a ticket for the aforementioned train in Italy. Think again: the French and Italian train companies don’t get on well after a recent spat... As such, plan ahead and don’t make assumptions.]

Don’t worry, be flexible Things go wrong while travelling. The bus is late, the ice cream shop everyone raved about has closed, and your wallet goes missing. These things are all part and parcel of any trip, so to quote a Bobby McFerrin song, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”. Sometimes the best travel memories come from the things that weren’t planned, the serendipitous parts of the journey that just happen, often because Plan A didn’t work out.

Enjoy!

Finally, remember to have a good time.

Travel can be stressful, but worry too much and you will ruin the trip! University provides plenty of opportunities for stress, so just enjoy the journey and don’t fret the small stuff. It’s a holiday – have fun!

one night in Bath, England, left a spot on my hate list wide open and exceeded any horrors Hollywood could concoct.

Now, public masturbation is often, if not always, frowned upon. Hostels are known to house some unorthodox characters, but an amicable, bespectacled chap from Adelaide had not raised suspicions on his arrival to the bunk above. Staying in the cheapest room available is the scourge of the exchange student, so come midnight, fifteen of my newest bedfellows and I change awkwardly into pyjamas beneath the prison grade sheets, avoiding eye contact at all times.

The room goes dark. I begin to drift off to sleep. Swift, rhythmic movements rustle beneath linen. I assure myself that he is simply massaging a sore wrist. Ferociously.

A loud moan punctures the black silence.

I smother my face with a pillow but the triumphant grunts of the dorm room

masturbator penetrate my temporary escape. I peer through the darkness to the other fourteen beds, searching for comrades, but no other desperately uncomfortable gaze meets mine. A cough, to advertise that I am awake and very, very disturbed, does little to slow down his self-love.

Suddenly, footsteps move across the wooden floorboards and a dark figure slowly opens the door in an attempt to quickly exit. A small shorthaired girl steps out into the lit hallway, turning her head to face the guilty bunk bed. Catching the whites of my eyes she mouths a simple “ew” and vanishes.

She would be the only escapee that night.

His attempts to shake my hand goodbye the next morning were in vain. I turned my body to the wall and feigned a particularly aggressive sinus infection. After all, snorers may be hostel wankers, but they do not wank in hostels.

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LIFE & STYLE// 16

Dig Lit TOM WESTLAND

(Disclosure: this column has been sponsored by Hancock Prospecting. Miss Georgina Hope Rineheart takes responsibility for all election comment, and for the quality of the heptameter.)

It goes without saying – but let me say it again, because I say it so well, if I do say so myself, and I do – that the history of humanity is largely a history of mining.

From the Promethean hero at the wheel of a Komatsu 960E-1 ultra-class haul truck as it crosses the rugged Pilbara, to Palaeolithic man roaming the forbidding plains in search of phosphate for his hungry children, mining defines where we have come from as a species, and where we are going.

Acknowledging this, I would like to take a break from our usual stampede through the fields of the Western canon to explore the singular contribution of the mining industry to our literary heritage.

Perhaps our greatest mineralogical poet was William Shakespeare himself, who has been named “The Bard of Bauxite”, although this sobriquet has yet to replace more conventional circumlocutions like “the Bard of Avon” or “William Shakespeare”. The Bard’s seminal piece of theatre, King Lear, is the tragic tale of a king whose vast prospecting empire is to be divided amongst three ungrateful daughters.

Shattered by the callousness of his offspring, Lear casts himself out into the wilds of North-Western Australia, where he roams amongst the indifferent rocks and obtains an injunction against his youngest child, declaring in almost-rhyming couplets: “Because of your loud and intolerable ungratefulness/ Never shall you now see the spoils of my inheritance”, a sentiment which doesn’t exactly scan, but which strikes so deeply into the open-cut coal mine of Lear’s heart that he has it engraved onto a twenty-foot-high lump of iron ore. The play ends with Lear’s shocking death; his children left to invest their millions in questionable Internet start-ups.

John Keats is another poet whose interests were largely subterranean. “Ode to Ferric Oxide”, one of the less well-known odes, is a typical one. “O, for a draught of iron oxide! that hath been/Cool’d a long age in the heroically-and expensively-delved earth” cries the narrator, drunk on the sublime beauty of earthly treasures. But not even ferric oxide is enough to make him forget his one true love, a wealthy though sadly unmarried heiress: “Away, away, for I will fly to thee/Not charioted by the Treasurer and his rampant tax/ But on the viewless wings of fly-in fly-out charter planes”.

My time is up, but I hope you will join me in my new spin-off column “Mining and Its Incredible and Hitherto Unrecognised Contribution to Australian Cinematic History”, coming soon to your nearest Fairfax Media product.

Eclipse of the Sibling Order The moment your younger sibling becomes cooler than you GUS MCCUBBING

Whilst this phenomenon appeared before me as a sudden jerking occurrence, it was actually the result of a rapid development on her behalf, which mirrored my stagnation. There had been about a six month gap in between my seeing her, during which she has been enjoying her first year out of school.

The evolvement culminated in a night out in Melbourne whilst entertaining two friends from Sydney.

Sitting around the dinner table drinking cheap red wine out of mugs, my eighteen year old sister enters. Following the introductions I provide between my two friends, my sister offers but a brief smile and the obligatory ‘Nice to meet you’, before sighing, as though the whole process has been incredibly arduous. She then responds, “Well…I have to go now. Have fun tonight kids.”

‘Kids’ immediately puts me on the back foot. The subconscious need to impress her dances through my mind. This is a disaster, as the girl is two and half years younger than me. Even acknowledging the commonly held belief that the fairer sex matures earlier than mine, this doesn’t sit well with me.

Having been sufficiently lubricated by the red, I propose to venture out into the night. My face blanks momentarily as I cycle through a mental compendium of options.

Being a Tuesday night, the best I can muster is to trace my sister to the Toff on Swanston Street, where her friend Albert Salt, already under the auspices of Triple J Unearthed, is

playing a brief set.

On arrival, with my attempts at getting on some sort of list proving futile, the three of us are required to pay the ten dollar entry fee. This is mildly vexing as I know my sister got in for free. Gazing around the band room people are huddled over dimly lit tables—apparently the done thing at Toff gigs now. We follow suit, grabbing the last vacant table in the back right corner and soon can’t help but notice my sister and her boyfriend, who can only be described as caricature of the iconic Melbourne hipster. Sitting confidently at the front, they then rise and begin to dance shamelessly in isolation to the dreamy electro-pop of Albert Salt.

Following the conclusion of the gig, my sister approaches us to suggest we accompany her troupe to a house party in Camberwell.

Whilst I find their immense excitement that they’ve managed to a secure a parent-less house for the night adorably juvenile, we agree to join them.

Getting off the train we are told that as my sister has to go to pick up some alcohol first, a small Chinese boy called Toy will lead us to the house. She drives away and Toy immediately runs off into the night, leaving only his silhouette to be occasionally seen as he darts underneath the streetlights. Is this what Jack Kerouac meant by shambling after the ‘mad ones’ who ‘dance down the streets like dingledodies’? Probably not. But I still get the sense this may turn out to be another enjoyable phase of the night.

As the house has in fact been without adults for about a week, evidence of a youthful usur-

pation lies everywhere. Records and empty Camel pouches lay strewn across the floor, a deck has been set up blasting something called Unicorn Kid and a Super Nintendo is stationed in the front room, captivating several of the drugged up teenagers. They’re having new age fun with a vintage feel.

Having known most of the group for several years, they all do the rounds in approaching me to catch up. However unlike the last few times I’ve hung out with them, they are no longer so enamoured with me, beaming with awe at even the most mundane of tales from the land of university. They remain cordial, respectful and ostensibly interested but now perceive me as a mere mortal, only capable of holding their attention for about ten minutes.

As my sister checks up on me every now and then, I am humbled by the realisation that they—and my sister more importantly— are cooler than me for various reasons. It’s that they have mostly developed a better and more expansive musical taste than me, wear trendier clothes, have ventured far beyond me in the realm of drug experimentation and often simply look older than me. It’s that she has a significantly better grasp of the Melbourne nightlife and has surrounded herself with such vibrant characters. It’s that I can’t help but rise every morning frustrated about my grades and somewhat jaded by the social routine I’ve made for myself. It’s that on the other hand they appear to be more jovial, more excited about life than me and, like ravenous sponges, desirous to soak up as many new ideas and experiences as possible.

LIFE & STYLE// 17

JEAN MARTIN

There are a good many things to be feared about Facebook. The dubious privacy record, the invasiveness and targeted advertisement, the undisguised ambition to profile us – to these objections most of us can agree. The German parliament, for one, alleged that Facebook’s facial recognition system was “illegally compiling a vast photo database of users without their consent”. And yet, while all of this is disconcerting, I have one other concern.

Against Facebook I make this complaint: in documenting our lives in a novel way, Facebook has brought into question our right to forget.

Forgetfulness may, at first, seem an odd virtue. After all, our society is one that praises the meticulous knowledge of the librarian that stacks shelves upon musty shelves of data; the quality of impartiality and fastidiousness in the collection of truth. But let us imagine for a moment what a life without forgetfulness would really be like – or, rather, let

Our Right to Forget us refer to one who has already imagined it.

In Funes el Memorioso, Jorge Luis Borges narrates an encounter with a nineteen-yearold boy, Funes, who acquired a strange condition from a fall from his horse. As a result of his accident, Funes becomes “el memorioso”, meaning “one with a vast memory.”

However, Funes does not have a vast memory in the way of the eccentric historical figures that he cites from an old Latin tome: “Cyrus, king of the Persians, who could call every soldier in his armies by name” or “Mithridates Eupator, who administered justice in the twenty-two languages of his empire”.Rather, Funes quite literally forgets nothing to the extent that he can possess no general, “platonic” ideas at all. The narrator recalls that it was “not only difficult for him to understand that the generic term dog embraced so many unlike specimens of differing sizes and different forms; he was disturbed by the fact that a dog at three-four-

teen (seen in profile) should have the same name as the dog at three-fifteen (seen from the front).” In fact, Funes cannot even count or conceptualise numbers, but instead dwells in an “overly replete world” with “nothing but details, almost contiguous details.”

While this story may appear to be little more than a curiosity, I am persuaded there is something more to it, for it suggests nothing less than that forgetfulness is an essential component to our lives. Forgetfulness is the capacity to recreate ourselves as people without being inexorably anchored to the conditions of our past. It is the capacity by which we can generalise and think; it is the lie through which we can communicate with others.

And here is my particular concern with Facebook. In effect, Facebook has become one immense information gathering exercise – and one for which we willing perform the labour. Under terms and conditions which grant them the status of supreme arbiters

and proprietors, we toil to gather, organise and move vast mountains of data. On their behalf, we publish our thoughts; we compile our dispositions and desires; we distribute images and videos; we circulate our conversations and correspondence; we register our movement and location; we amass lists of our friends and associates; we cross-reference them in our photos and quotations In return, Facebook has devised numerous, sometimes deviant ways in order to coherently present all this information to us in order that none of us shall ever forget or relinquish who we were and what we did. For the internet is like Funes – it never forgets.

There is, no doubt, a sense in which Facebook has made us more connected. But I cannot help but think that there perhaps is also a sense in which this has been at the expense of that forgetfulness which makes life, language and community possible to begin with.

Finding Balance to Live the Good Life

Want to hear your song on Woroni Radio?

Request a song every Thursday: www.woroniradio.com.au 11am - 3pm Keep an eye out for podcasts www.woroni.com.au/pocasts ROHANA PRINCE

Women should go back to the kitchen.

There, I said it.

No, its ok, I’m not some kind of female misogynist. I didn’t really mean it. What I meant is that there might be some lessons from the “olden days” that we in the modern world could do well to learn from.

Back in those idealistic, “after-the-Depression but before-the-Second-World-War” days, Mr Jones went to work whilst Mrs Jones looked after the kids, cleaned the house and made sure dinner was on the table at exactly 5:30pm. There were some exceptions to the rule, granted, but generally everyone had their own little place in the world of suburbia.

Look at today’s suburbia and you’ll find a different story entirely. Women are expected to drop their babies off at a crèche at six months of age (to be collected shortly before starting preschool). The perfect mum will work a full time job, be able to cook like a more attractive Jamie Oliver, do the groceries, keep the house clean, get the kids to soccer, and retain the body of a twenty year old by doing their five cardio, three strength and two yoga sessions a week. Does any sane person have time for this? I think not.

Nevertheless, the media is filled with messages saying that in order to be suc-

cessful everyone should be able to do everything. Open any women’s magazine and you’ll find pages of advice on “How to Get Rid of Your Tummy”, “How to Resolve Disputes Over the Work Photocopier”, “Dinner for 6 with 17 Ingredients!” or “Turn Your Lounge room Into an Outdoor Jungle Retreat!”. The everyday woman should

At the Olympics we honour those who have dedicated their lives to such pursuits as following a black line up and down a pool. be able to do all these things, and do them well. Balance, I think, is what they call it.

In a cruel twist of fate, however, we reward those who live an unbalanced existence. At the Olympics we honour those who have dedicated their lives to such pursuits as following a black line up and down a pool.

The majority of our politicians clearly did nothing in their youth but captain debating teams or sit in the front row of their economics class. We like fat chefs who waddle

through their kitchens telling us to add yet another bottle of cream. The list goes on.

What does this irony add up to? Trouble in paradise, that’s what. We’re a confused society. Should you volunteer with a charity or take the new promotion being offered to you at work? Should you play first division soccer or leave time in the evenings to cook a half decent dinner? You should do all of these and more, or maybe just one of them and do it really well. Depends who you listen to.

Whether we like it or not, society is changing. We’ve got more obese kids than ever before. More and more people are diagnosed with mental illnesses such as anxiety and depression each year. Divorce rates are up. And our politicians can’t seem to find their way out of a paper bag, never mind a sinking boat full of refugees.

I’m not saying that the pressures of the modern world are the only causes of the domestic issues we have to deal with. What I am saying is that the next time you make a disapproving comment about your grandparents’ generation for keeping women from fulfilling their potential, have a think about the way they went about their lives.

No, they shouldn’t have kept women in the kitchen, but maybe they were right not to expect everyone to have super human abilities.

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REVIEWED// 18

The Darkness is Back

LISTEN // CD Hot Cakes The Darkness 2012

WILL ANDERSON

You may remember The Darkness as the band you rocketed to stardom in 2004 with “I Believe in a Thing Called Love” and their debut album Permission to Land.

Then the band became the ultimate rock n’ roll cliché; the real-life Spinal Tap. From Justin Hawkins’ drug use and subsequent rehab, spandex catsuits and guitar solos on a levitating white tiger, the band split up in acrimonious circumstances after their second album, One Way Ticket to Hell...And Back, which was about as overblown as any album could be.

To put it in the words of the band’s frontman, Justin Hawkins, “The fucking Darkness are back!”. This time, the new album, Hot Cakes, like Permission to Land, doesn’t take itself too seriously. It begins with “Every Inch Of You”, a song that appears to be a somewhat different direction for the band. However, it’s plainly obvious that it’s a Darkness record when Justin Hawkins screams “SUCK MY COOOOOCK!”.

It has the hallmarks which made Permission to Land such a successful album. It’s an album which is fully aware of its over-the-top nature.

”Livin’ Each Day Blind” is a classic power ballad, only with far better lyrics than most other songs of the same formula. “Keep Me Hangin’ On” lays on the Lynyrd Skynyrd/ ZZ Top guitar grooves, while ”With a Woman” has unmistakable pub-rock muscle.

The premise of the album is summed up in “Everbody Have a Good Time”, with the lyric, “Take off your thinking cap/and listen to your heart”.

But it’s a solid record, with a few surprises too. “Forbidden Love” starts as quiet, quirky pop before a monumental chorus, while the power-pop riff of “Concrete” brings back the heyday of 80’s hair metal. And if you’re looking for an answer to “I Believe in a Thing Called Love”, that’s here in the three-minute head-rush “Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us”.

Hot Cakes knows the appeal of big, dumb rock n’ roll. And big, dumb rock n’ roll is something The Darkness do very well. The album revels in the combination of self-aware, pompous indulgence and solid feel-good songs backed with heavy guitars. Throw a few power ballads in and you have yourself a record.

While it doesn’t quite reach the heights of Permission to Land, it’s still a solid album with an infectious feel-good vibe, and like the first album, it’s a breath of fresh air in a music industry full of mediocre, formulaic pop, whiny indie music and every festering turd backed by Simon Cowell.

Silversun Pickup Bronze LISTEN // CD Neck of the Woods Silversun Pickups 2012

ROBERT SELTH Several months ago, fans of 90s-style alternative guitar rock received a small treat in the form of the third studio record from Los Angeles’s Silversun Pickups. And make no mistake, the American 90s are very relevant to this band. Their central reference point is the Smashing Pumpkins: a big, shiny sound with a few noise effects for texture; equally big emotions; plenty of heft and heaviness in the guitars; and a glorious overload of drama, both musical and lyrical. Silversun Pickups’ palette is rather limited, but they’re good enough that this rarely feels like a problem.

Neck of the Woods is grand, tuneful, and compelling. It ticks every box that it needs to tick.

Theatricality is this album’s guiding principle, and the band are definitely good at it.

From the first thirty seconds of “Skin Graph,” it’s clear they are stretching out their sound and indulging their penchant for drama.

The six-minute song has a sweeping, selfconsciously epic effect that sets the tone for the rest of the album. Most of the tunes that follow work on tension-and-release arrangements augmented by a powerful and

prominent rhythm section. That gives them an attention-grabbing force and insistence.

The guitars, too, sound sharp and massive.

The adolescent-sounding voice of singer/ songwriter Brian Aubert adds a soft touch that makes the whole thing seem more nuanced, even though he rarely quite sounds like he’s deeply invested in what he’s singing about.

The lyrics are romantic, evocative, extreme, and vivid – a cocktail of yearning and fatalism.

There is a fair bit of dissonant noise shaded through most of the tracks for atmosphere, and this has drawn comparisons with the less mainstream-ready of Silversun Pickups’ influences. But really, they never use it as more than dressing. Sonic clarity is the order of the day.

Silversun Pickups make music that is generally open, accessible, and ready for the stadiums, but they still tip their hat to the underground and keep one eye on their indie credibility. With this album it hasn’t worked, to judge by the reaction from the hardline indie press, who have mostly run for the hills.

And it’s true that Neck of the Woods is noticeably more radio-friendly than the band’s previous work. But that’s fine – they know what they’re doing, they do it well, and the music is good. If this record loses them some of their original fan base, hopefully they will win enough of a broader one that it will only spur them on to greater things.

Ca n b er r a G i g G u i d e

Your ultimate guide to what’s hot and what’s happening on the Canberra music scene MARTIN PEREZ-MCVIE

Waterford

Jeru the Damaja will grace the stage of Transit Bar on September 17th direct from East New York, Brooklyn. One of the most important rappers from the golden era of hip hop of the early 90’s, Jeru’s hardcore style and commanding stage presence mean that this is a not-to-be-missed show for anyone who considers themselves a serious hip hop fan. Tickets can be purchased for a bit under $30 online at Moshtix or from Landspeed Records in Garema Place.

Local indie rockers Waterford are playing a show on Saturday the 8th to mark the departure of their drummer to do a PhD somewhere, so this will be the last chance to catch these guys for a little while.

The show’s at The Phoenix and is free.

Then on Sunday night The Phoenix welcomes back folk-punk rockers The Smith Street Band launching their new LP. Accompanying them on this tour are Restorations, all the way from the US, and local punks Outcome. The show’s $15 on the door and kicks off a bit after 7pm.

The Smith Street Band

Jeru the Damaja

That same night hellosQuare recordings will be curating the Bootleg Sessions at The Phoenix. Tasmanian noise punk band Naked are headlining, supported by new kids on the block Sex Noises and Kid of Harith. E A V E S, local 18 year old beat maker reminiscent of Four Tet or Flume, rounds out this very mixed bill.

The incomparable RnB-come-gangsta rap outfit Bone Thugs-n-Harmony return to Canberra on Friday the 21st.

This time they’re playing the UC refectory with Big Dave, Grantwho?, Kitty B and N2W. Tickets are $50 and can be bought through Ticketek and Moshtix.

Bone Thugs-n-Harmony

Blur Revisited

of the London Olympics was only the high point in a wave of revivalism that has been rising around them all year. Back in the 90s, Blur were the heroes of Britpop – a resurgence in classic British songwriting that swept through the country for a few short ROBERT SELTH but incredible years, led by the trinity of OaNow is a good time to be a Blur fan. The sis, Pulp, and Blur. Oasis were a great band band’s triumphant concert on the last night but a narrow one, never straying far from

LISTEN // CD Blur 21: The Box Blur 2012

REVIEWED// 19

their basic stomping rock template; and Pulp were wildly and diversely creative, but always a bit too weird to be fully embraced by the nation. Yet Blur were both a massive cultural phenomenon, quickly becoming standard-bearers for young, cool, resurgent Britain, and a rock band of extraordinary talent and originality. They’ve just released

you feel safe when you sleep.” That might be the most affecting line in all of Blur. Damon utters it on the heartbreaking “No Distance Left to Run,” one of the gems on what is (mostly) his break-up album. Sadly though, much of the record falls short of that mark.

Opening track “Tender” feels like a great song held down by a wooden performance, though its real glory can be heard on several concert versions. There are also a few too many jarring noise-rockers, which don’t sit well with the slower moments. One suspects that Damon Albarn, whose weakness has always been that he has much more cleverness than self-discipline, couldn’t quite bring himself to cut the running time by ten minutes and give this album’s underlying gentleness some breathing space.

That said, much of 13 is still sad and powerful music.

It’s definitely worth a listen.

Leisure (1991) Like their major contemporaries Radiohead and Nirvana, Blur give barely a hint of future greatness on their debut record. The young band are clearly in thrall to the shoegaze movement, and they stick very close to that already well-trodden path. But since they’re not yet writing good melodies, the result is not hazy bliss but droning tedium. Skip this one – there is so much better music lying ahead.

Modern Life is Rubbish (1993) A recent poll by Q found that this is UK listeners’ favourite Blur album by a very large margin. That’s fitting for a record about the squalour and romance of everyday life in a very distinctly English setting.

Modern Life is Rubbish gets a bit samey, with a long and cynical parade of character sketches and social satires that are all clever, but not always interesting. But overall it’s a bracing and surprising record with plenty of strong guitar pop tunes and a great deal of wit. Blur’s reputation as the heirs to the Kinks – via the Smiths – rests here.

Parklife (1994) This is the gold at the heart of the legend – the album that not only made Blur into superstars, but united a nation behind British music and British culture as a thing to be proud of once again. Parklife gathers strands from the last three decades of pop and weaves them into a modern yet timeless kaleidoscope that sounds classic after one whirlwind listen.

Damon Albarn has hit maturity as a songwriter, and he revels in it. “Girls and Boys” is Europop with attitude. “Tracy Jacks” and “Parklife” are funny, cool and muscular rock songs. “Far Out” is a tingly pop tune about astronomy. “Badhead,” “To the End” and “This is a Low” are models of swooning, gorgeous pathos. Every song surprises, and even today the whole record sounds bold, vibrant, and bursting with melody and ideas. It’s awesome.

a lavish box set containing all seven of their albums, plus extras; but if you’re new to the band, you probably won’t want to shell out the money for such a behemoth. So here’s the album-by-album rundown to help you build up your Blur collection a bit more modestly. Of course, if you’re already a fan, you can always have fun rediscovering them.

ing half-heartedly not to get tugged into the silly debate on whether they were better than Oasis, Blur do little more than stick to their holding pattern. That’s okay though, because it’s a wonderful pattern. The second half of the album drags, with the band’s now-trademark eclecticism becoming tiresome rather than exciting. But the first half is great, featuring the superb “Charmless Man” and the even better “The Universal,” which has deservedly become their standard concert closer.

The Great Escape (1995) To say that The Great Escape is basically Blur (1997) Parklife, Part II – only less good – is harsh, You’re the central band in a movement you but essentially correct. Basking in the limespearheaded, but you’re sick of that scene light at the height of Britpop mania, and tryand you want to break free. So of course,

you look across the Atlantic and you embrace the genre that most of your country has been resisting for most of this decade: noisy alternative guitar rock. The result: you create “Song 2” and it becomes your biggest ever single, mostly thanks to people who don’t realise you only wrote it to poke fun at Nirvana. But that doesn’t matter, because you also create an album that sits comfortably with the best of Sonic Youth and Pavement. It’s much less varied than your last two records, but who really cares when you can make an electric guitar sound so damn good?

13 (1999) “I hope you’re with someone who makes

Think Tank (2003) Depending on whom you ask, Think Tank is either a thrilling adventure in indie electro-pop, or a confused mess of undeveloped ideas with much more style than substance.

It’s easily the most divisive Blur album. This reviewer resides in the second camp, and feels obliged to point out that Damon Albarn had already given us an electro-pop adventure much better than this one anyway, when he made the first Gorillaz album two years previously. But Think Tank does contain some treasures, including the classic “Out of Time,” and the neglected closer “Battery in Your Leg”.

That last song is wrapped achingly around a descending twelve-note piano line that simply cries out with melancholy beauty.

It’s the perfect final bow from this band.

It’s becoming more and more common to hear Blur called the greatest band of the ‘90s. Given that their competition includes Radiohead and Pavement, that’s a tough call.

But it’s hard to think of another band who covered so much territory, delved into so many different styles, and did it all so consistently well. Blur may not have been the best ‘90s band, but they were perhaps the definitive one. And their music is brilliant. Quite simply, these albums have not grown old.

REVIEWED// 20 Judging a book by its play CASEY WHITE

The Book of Everything is a delightful play and a wise choice for Bruce Hall who presented it at the ANU Arts Centre Drama Lab. Set in 1951 Amsterdam, it relates the tales of a nine year-old named Thomas who sees things no one else can. He lives in a family of four and makes particular note of their unhappiness. His father repeatedly hits his mother and punishes Thomas by beating him with a wooden spoon. In the play, The Book of Everything is a diary in which Thomas records his thoughts.

Capturing an atmosphere reminiscent of a “child’s imagination” the set design opened up a world of possibilities as to how the story is going to unfold from the moment we entered the theatre. Playing Thomas, Alex Battye welcomed us into his world with such innocence that at times we questioned whether he really is a child trapped inside a twenty-three year-old’s body. Battye approached the role with a sense of care and precision that made listening to his story thoroughly enjoyable.

Tim Crundall played Thomas’ father in a role that bears a striking similarity to that of Reverend Shaw Moore in Footloose. He gave a solid portrayal of a man who is caught up in his need to look holy, but his iron fisted delivery, with its extended dramatic pauses, may have left the audience questioning whether a line or two had been forgotten.

In the supporting role of Thomas’ mother, Alex Fogg delivered a strongly emotive performance that added to our desire to see Thomas’ violent father stopped. Eliza Thompson plays Margot, Thomas’ sister, in a performance that presented an interesting and curious interpretation of a 1950s teen.

With six other cast members embodying a chorus of different characters, from Jesus, a witch, angels, aunties, and read out loud club members, they worked as well-placed support for the main action.

The storybook nature of the script gave strong rise and fall to our emotions and sometimes the space between being on the verge of tears and bent over in hysterical laughter was only a matter of seconds. The flow became disjointed in places as various scene changes became louder and clankier than the music that was used to cover them. It’s a problem that is hard to avoid in such a small space.

Bruce Hall have created a show that gave our own imaginations a refreshing renewal; a wonderful night in the realm of the mind.

BEN LATHAM

Quality Quirk

WATCH // FILM Moonrise Kingdom Wes Anderson 2012 SINEAD O’CONNELL

The exhausting three-year interim since Wes Anderson’s last film release finally ended on the Thursday 30th August.

Moonrise Kingdom had arrived. Though it’s safe to assume that most people in our generation are familiar with the Wes persuasion of film, I won’t reveal too much, just in case you haven’t seen it yet (what?).

What I will divulge, of course, is that the element of Anderson artworks made up of very accurate, aesthetic, poignant and hilarious detailing is very present in his latest offering. The details are so deliberately attractive it’s as though there is a hidden frame embracing every scene, suggesting each shot is just as delicate and significant as the next.

Written with friend and almost-cousin Roman Coppola, it comes as a given that the narrative is just as subtle as it is enlightening.

With the particulars of Moonrise Kingdom, that is, with a cast predominately made up of children, the dialogue is age sensitive. There is an age appropriateness that ensures each topic of discussion is spectacularly insight-

ful within the plot as well as the lens’ vision.

For example, Suzy (Kara Hayward) suffers from some kind of pre-adolescent existential crisis and speaks of it in such a way that her logic is obscured yet understandable. Regardless, like most Wes characters, she says most with her eyes.

With an impeccable cast (Bruce Willis, Frances McDormand, Tilda Swinton, Jason Schwartzman, Edward Norton and, of course, Bill Murray), the integrity of the film’s characterisation is upheld once again - in terms of speaking without actually saying anything.

Our “corduroyed auteur” cultivates the realm of Moonrise Kingdom around a love between two twelve year-olds in a New England town during the mid ‘60s.

As his seventh feature film, identifying Anderson’s intentions and the resemblance to his other films is no mean feat.

Included in Moonrise Kingdom are niche novels, peculiar record jackets, turquoise eye shadow and a corncob pipe, as well as outfits designed to parallel particular personality traits to a tee.

Similarly, as much as one hates the word “quirky” being thrown forth in the same sentence as Wes Anderson, it is nevertheless a necessity in deconstructing his path in cinematic history to enable recognition of the type of character content the audi-

ence is dealing with. Quirk: an accident, a coincident, a twist, an idiosyncrasy - it is this exact contradiction and precision that Wes employs in order to expose an element of the human condition that cannot, and should not, be expressed in any other way.

Anderson and Coppola are writers of unspoken truths, of the lives of dreamers and delinquents, of misfits and outcasts. Once or twice coined as creators of “dollhouse worlds” (whether or not that’s an insult is difficult to say), it is, on the contrary, obvious that Anderson and his team of exceptionally creative contemporaries build new worlds from the ground up that are much more realistic than many of the blockbusters that have ambushed our cinematic library this century.

With Anderson’s staple pans, close-ups and jump cuts, rest assured that it is all there again, with only one disappointment: that our highly anticipated feature did not maintain the traditional finale.

There is no folk tune holding the characters tall as they walk (or dance) off the screen in slow motion, redeemed from their romantic transgressions or rescued from their tortured souls. However, Moonrise Kingdom still ends with the romantic and redeemed, the characters tall(er) and their fictional souls comparatively intact.

Interview: Hunting Grounds

“It’s the idea of looking forward with a clear idea of what’s happened in the past. It’s us feeling like a new band. It’s a fresh start for us even though we’ve been together for so long.”

Just days before Hunting Grounds’ riotous return to the city of Canberra at Transit Bar on Saturday night, I am joined by the humble Michael Belsar, lead vocalist and guitarist of the rowdy six-piece, on tour and living it up in the sunshine. “We’re at a beach house in Byron Bay literally ten metres away from the beach! Brisbane and Gold Coast were insane. The crowds were mental!

We could hear them singing all the lyrics; it was an extremely flattering experience.”

For Hunting Grounds, the release of their debut album In Hindsight is a retrospective search for growth and identity amidst an industry of labels and typecasts. As Michael

relates, “We decided that we didn’t want to be pigeonholed into that heavy rock/punk genre. Our EPs were really cocky, heavy and aggressive. We just didn’t want to be that band anymore.” For Hunting Grounds, the keyword is honesty. After writing a majority of the album and even releasing the album’s first single “In Colour” early last year, “It just didn’t feel right. We pushed back the release date and rewrote the entire album. We wanted to play music that we would want to listen to. Finally we produced something that was really, really honest and really, really us.”

The band consists of six brilliantly talented musicians and songwriters. two guitars, a keyboard, drums, bass, and three vocalists on constant rotation. How on earth do they manage to put together all of that creative input? “It’s really easy! Someone will work out the base of a song and everyone just tweaks

a part of their own. Like I said, it all fits together so easily.” For Hunting Grounds, the creative process seems effortless. According to Michael, the fluent artistry evident in each of their seamless, beautifully crafted songs has stemmed from the band’s childhood friendships. “I think a newer band with so many songwriters would struggle, but we’ve known each other for so long that it just works somehow. We’ve been playing together since we were in Year Eight so there’s a lot of chemistry between the six of us.”

Like all chemistry, theirs is volatile and dynamic, sparked by the beaming lights of the Transit Bar stage: guitarist and bassist leaping off the stage, thrashing and moshing with the convulsing, energetic crowd; lead singer snatching a balloon off the roof to suck up the helium in long drags, giving his screams a wailing, high-pitched edge; the drum-kit dis-

mantled and hammered by every member of the band in an extended instrumental frenzy.

Some bands seem to purposefully avoid the tiny city of Canberra in their travels, but for Hunting Grounds, it’s an absolute treat.

“We always love coming to Canberra! Being from Ballarat ourselves, we love playing small cities. They have such a genuine vibe.

People just seem to be stoked to be seeing music.” And, if you happen to pass by an unruly group of young men crashed out on the streets of Civic in the wee hours of Sunday morning, do not be alarmed! For Hunting Grounds, it seems to come part and parcel with the whole Canberra experience. “After the first show we every played in Canberra we ended up sleeping in a strip club! It was possibly the wildest show and the wildest night ever. We had a phenomenal time.”

OUT & ABOUT// 21

CAMPUS Woroni will be scouting Union Court on Thursdays at 1pm

YASMIN MASRI NAKUL LEGHA

STYLE

SPORT// 22

Why We Do What We Do

CALLUM FRYER

In my last article I wrote about Anna Meares, mentioning her broken neck and then nine months later her silver medal in Athens. The AFL’s Leigh Adams has, in the last five games, dislocated his shoulder three times. In the cycling world, one of Australia’s most promising juniors, Will Walker, developed a heart condition that meant that his elevated heart rate reached 300bpm when exercising (the average maximum human heart rate is around 200bpm). He was forced to retire, but a decade later is back and racing, risking his life.

More shockingly, Robbie Williams, a Canberra based cyclist died last week on a ride.

The cause is currently unknown. However he did have a pre-existing a heart condition and it was reported that a friend who was on the ride said he thought Williams was dead before he hit the ground. Whilst Will Walker is still racing, Robbie Williams was twenty-seven and fit as an animal.

With so much risk, so much pain and

so many tragedies, all of this begs the question, why do we do what we do?

On the same day a South Australian cyclist Shamus Liptrot passed away in his sleep.

He died of injuries he’d had for over three or so years, which resulted from brain damage received in a crash. The doctors gave him a week, he lasted over three years.

It’s a tough sport and events like these are tragedies. We mourn the losses, which have shattered communities, families and friends but we can’t quit and we can’t race scared. These people died doing what they loved and if we race timidly we’re doing them an injustice. We race with heart and we race because it’s what we love, and we always race with these people in our minds.

In contrast, during the 1995 Tour de France, Fabio Casartelli hit a rock pillar at over sixty kilometres per hour and died.

During stage 18, three days after the accident, Lance Armstrong won what is most probably his most memorable victory. He attacked the peloton and then the group he was with so many times that it became evident he wasn’t going to give up. He crossed the line alone, with his arms pointing to the sky, winning the race for Casartelli, his teammate and friend. Whichever way we remember those who have passed, we do what we can, but we do what we love and we race with heat, no matter what.

So how can one have so much passion?

One of the most famous stories in cycling is of a British cyclist; Tom Simpson, riding the

Whichever way we remember those that have passed, we do what we can, but we do what we love and we race with heat, no matter what.

Tour de France during the days when drugs were legal. He was riding up Mont Ventoux, which is covered in white rock and reflects the sun, intensifying heat on a scorching day. Tom Simpson had so many amphetamines in his system that he couldn’t feel the pain he was in, which coupled with immense dehydration, forced him to collapse and pass out, choking on his own tongue. A mechanic who was in a follow car realised what was happening and jammed a screwdriver down his throat, pulling his tongue out and saving his life. Tom Simpson came round, looked at the mechanic and uttered his last words; “Put me back on my bike”. He rode then 100m before collapsing again, however this time he did not get up. He died before paramedics were anywhere near the scene.

The passion to want nothing but to keep going, no matter what, to have nothing in your life but to want to keep doing what you do, that’s why we compete. That’s why we do what we do.

New Boys Pave the Way in the EPL

JOSHUA CHU-TAN

The previous season of the English Premier League, had to be one of the most thrilling, if not THE most thrilling season of football that the world has ever witnessed. With Manchester City’s riveting title win still fresh in everyone’s mind, the new season could not come any sooner for all the eager soccer fans out there. Now, only two weeks in, it is certainly keeping on par with it’s predecessor.

Most fans will be looking to see how the big name signings fare and how long it’ll take them to settle in to the more physical style of the EPL. Eden Hazard is a big name debutant after joining Chelsea following a long period of speculation surrounding his future. One of the hottest new names in football in the preseason, it seemed as though every major club in the Premier League were linked to this Belgian playmaker. However, it was Chelsea who snatched him up in a deal worth around 30 million pounds.

So how has Hazard done so far? Well, he’s certainly doing well right now. Easily the most lively player in the Chelsea squad

over their first three games, Hazard has already bagged one goal and six assists for his new team in London. Looks like there won’t be a transition period for this guy.

How about Shinji Kagawa? Manchester United’s new Japanese playmaker. There was plenty of hype surrounding him when he arrived from Bundesliga champions, Borussia Dortmund, on whether he was bought just to increase shirt sales in Asia. Considering his performances in the Red Devils’s first two games however, I’m sure those critics have put a zip on it. Probably the best player on the pitch for Man United in both games, his vision and passing has been top class. He’s already found the net once, and I’m sure he will link well with Robin Van Persie and Wayne Rooney for what, on paper, seems like a frightening attack force for the team hailing from Trafford.

One of possibly the biggest signings this preseason so far was (as mentioned before) Robin Van Persie. Yes, he’s definitely not a “new boy” per se being the top goalscorer of the competition last year and helping Arsenal to finish a surprising third. However, his move

to Old Trafford was definitely a major talking point and a very fine acquisition for Fergie’s men. Like Kagawa and Hazard, fans were interested to see how he settled with his new teammates. He came on as a substitute in the first game and had an average performance.

He started the next game and sure enough, he scores within ten minutes in classic Van Persie fashion, or in other words...sheer brilliance. A sublime hook finish from just inside the box with a man marking him had the fans who used to cringe at the mention of his name stand on their feet in jubilation.

Apart from losing their talisman striker, Arsenal also brought in some attacking firepower of their own this offseason signing, Lucas Podolski from FC Koln, Santi Cazorla from Malaga and Olivier Giroud from Montpellier. However, these three have not really gelled on the pitch yet and Arsenal have failed to score in the first two games of the season.

Cazorla looks the sharpest out of the three.

Bargain of the season so far? Probably Michu of Swansea. Arriving to the Welsh outfit at only two million pounds from Rayo Val-

lecano in Spain, Michu was the top scoring midfielder in the previous La Liga season, and his form does not seem to be waning any time soon. Already slotting in three goals in his first two games, Swansea have dominated their opening fixtures. Two wins on the dot with new manager and footballing legend, Michael Laudrup, no goals conceded and eight goals scored. They are most certainly a team to watch this season.

There are many “new look” teams and certainly plenty of new faces in the league. How well will the new boys continue to do? How well with the newly promoted teams do? Who will be in contention for a European place?

For now, it is much too soon to tell. It will no doubt be hard to surpass the excitement (and anguish) that we saw in the previous year, but based on how events have unfolded in the first two rounds, we certainly have an invigorating season of football ahead of us.

You can follow Josh on Twitter: @joshchutan

SPORT// 23

NRL Finals: Crunch Time ZACK MACKEY

Armstrong Out CAM WILSON

Lance Armstrong is a selfish attention whore who would rather hurt others than tarnish his perfectly polished PR image.

Let me explain: Armstrong has recently announced that he is refusing to contest the doping charges levied against him by the United States AntiDoping Agency (USADA). In response, the USADA has stripped all his titles (including his seven consecutive Tour de France wins) and given him a lifetime ban from competitive racing.

By avoiding facing these charges, it has been said that Lance can retire an “innocent” man. By this same logic, a murderer who doesn’t turn up to his court case is also “innocent”. It’s curious that a man who is known for his perseverance suddenly wants to give up rather than defend his legacy.

I don’t care whether Armstrong has doped.

Let’s be honest, he probably has. It is extraordinary that Armstrong has consistently won a race against competition that is doped to the eyeballs. And by “extraordinary”, I mean “unusual unless he been shooting human growth hormone (HGH) in between his toes as well”. In five out of seven Tours that Armstrong has won, the cyclists who placed second have failed drug tests in the past.

But who cares? Despite speculation that the reason Armstrong is avoiding the USADA is because there has been compelling evidence of his doping found, let’s assume that he’s clean. Otherwise, he’s just another drug cheat (admittedly, in a sport of drug cheats) trying to beat the system like everyone else.

Even if he is drug-free, Armstrong is still a self-centered coward who is quitting the game now that he has nothing else to gain.

Armstrong’s sponsors have stuck with him

so far. Nike, Oakley, and many of his other sponsors have all publically stated their support for Lance. In fact, donations to his charity, humbly named the “Lance Armstrong Foundation”, have skyrocketed since the announcement.

The publicity he has attained is a doubleedged sword. Armstrong has built his reputation, and the reputation of his charity, around his “clean” image. It is the persona of an athlete who has overcome cancer, conquered a myriad of drug cheats, fought the odds and won. He is an inspiration to many, he has had amazing philanthropic contributions and he has profited out of this as well (with an estimated net worth of $125million).

However this all comes with a responsibility that Lance has shirked. There is a duty to all those who have bought into his image of transcendence through determination. Armstrong owes these people a hero, and he has now taken that away from them.

In maintaining this plea of innocence, Lance is taking others down with him. Latching onto anything around him, he has lashed out at the USADA, calling their charges an “unconstitutional witch hunt”.

In doing so, he demeans one of the organisations trying to clean up the sport and repair its poor reputation. Furthermore, Armstrong will now be remembered as yet another cyclist proven to be a cheat. If he is innocent, Armstrong, by refusing to attend the arbitration, has damned cycling to be a sport known for its chemical assistance rather than the thrills of racing, the excitement of competition and the pursuit of human physical excellence.

Ultimately, Lance Armstrong has done a lot of good in this world. The issue is whether he is erasing some of good for his own selfish reasons.

Lance Armstrong is a selfish attention whore who would rather hurt others than tarnish his perfectly polished PR image.

It’s that time of year again. The games are bigger, the crowds swell and the familiar crunch of two forwards of questionable intelligence hitting into each other resonates. Some teams already have their future decided, but the middle of the ladder is still being hotly contested. The past few weeks in the NRL have been massive, with the finals looming, media rights being purchased by Channel Nine and the Cronulla Sharks’ future guaranteed.

The first weekend in September heralds the final round of the NRL regular season.

The Canterbury Bulldogs have wrapped up the minor premiership whilst the Parramatta Eels have unfortunately languished in the depths of the table, collecting the wooden spoon for season 2012. However the remaining positions in the top eight are still up for grabs and a lot lies in the balance of the coming round’s results. Even for the “safe” teams at the top of ladder, a loss this coming weekend could be disastrous. The Bulldogs had a bad loss against Canberra last weekend and Melbourne only just managed to scrape against the Sharks with two late tries. The Storm must be aware of the consequences of losing towards the end of the season, having last year losing the final two rounds before crashing out of the finals, despite achieving the minor premiership.

A lot revolves around the Broncos and Panthers match on the 31st August. The Sharks, Raiders, Broncos, Tigers, Titans, Knights and Dragons all have a mathematical chance of making the eight. For the lower ranked teams though, they are relying on big margins in upsets to go their way, otherwise Mad Monday will be a lot earlier than many had hoped.

In other news, the ARL Commission is tipped to sell their media rights for $1.25 billion, needing only tofinalise agreements in New Zealand and for their mobile and online rights. This expected total will equal the AFL’s current agreement, and will place the game in

great stead financially. Recently, the broadcast rights were sold for $1.025 billion to the Channel 9/Fox Sports consortium, and the rest is expected to soon follow. Watch this space!

Fans of the Cronulla Sharks can now rest easy, after the club’s future was secured. The NSW government’s Planning Assessment Commission approved a $300 million development proposal adjacent to their home ground, Toyota Stadium, which will include shops and residential units. This has resulted in an immediate $10 million boost to the Sharks’ coffers, which saves the club from a debt that would have led to their Leagues Club closing and the sale of their playing field. In addition, it is estimated that rent from the development will provide the Sharks with $1 million a year. This is great news not only for fans of the Shire based club, but also the game as a whole, who would miss the club that has been playing since 1963.

Alas, with the end of the season nearing, it is also time to farewell some players from the NRL. We bid adieu to St George Illawarra’s Ben Hornby and Dean Young, Parramatta’s Nathan Hindmarsh and Luke Burt, Brisbane warhorse Petero Civoniceva, North Queensland’s Aaron Payne, Cronulla’s Colin Best and Warriors lock Michael Luck. Together they have played 2000 games in 105 seasons, scoring more than 430 tries, 3000 points. A special goodbye must be given to one-team-man Nathan Hindmarsh. ‘Hindy’ has been an absolute workhorse for the Eels ever since his debut in 1998 and still holds the record for the most first grade games for the club. Hindmarsh always gave his all, reflected in multiple representative honours. Farewell Hindy – it’s been a pleasure.

With finals footy on the horizon and teams still vying for a spot in the top eight, the excitement surrounding the final round of the regular season is building exponentially as the days count down. We are well and truly into the crunch time of the NRL.

The Back Page PERLUSTRATING ASSERVATIONS Examining commonly held beliefs with a blow torch and a bunker buster

“Socialism just hasn’t been done right yet.”

JAMIE FREESTONE MATHEW MCGANN

would remove convicted killers (the bad eggs) from society. This would correspond to a 0% threshold of government murders, literally infinitely less than the 19% rate of Socialism can be broadly defined as an government murders socialists give themapproach to politics and economics which selves for their revolution, surely a miscarfavours the production of goods for the riage of justice. good of society as a whole; it locates the ills Applying the threshold to a smaller scale, of society in the acquisitive goal of private if the father of a family of six has the bright property, the chaos of the free market and idea of a fairer, more socialist system of the harmful effects of the division of labour; pocketmoney for the children, the observit is still a significant part of left-wing poliing socialist must be OK with the summary tics, but found its most eloquent expression execution of one of the children during the in Marx and its practical culmination in the family meeting at breakfast.

Perhaps the stillborn communist revolutions of the 20th father could explain the recent death of century — supporters maintain it just hasn’t the child’s sibling as the been done right, necessity of “breaking yet and hasn’t had eggs to make omelettes”; a chance to fulfil its this would be more easily potential. explained if they were Socialism does eating omelettes at the sound like a more time. agreeable and In the spirit of egaliegalitarian economic tarianism, we should also system over the be fair among governprofit-driven capitalment types.

This would ist system. However, mean that democracy is based on historical owed many, many more data, the hatching murders in order to of a socialist state improve itself. Perhaps will involve much Barack Obama, leader of bloodshed. If somethe world’s most iconic one thinks socialism free-market democracy, is still worth one should have the power more try, then they to personally dole out are asserting that the murder to improve the benefit to the inhabitnation. Such a rampage ants of a new socialist could only damage his society is worth, if reputation in the eyes of not the cumulative those who already believe total of all deaths from past attempts at sohim to be a socialist — or those who believe cialist utopias (approx. 100 million people), states shouldn’t murder people. However, then at least the historical average amount of socialists’ super-moral stance allows them citizens you need to kill to get one going. the tolerance to look past the scramble of If we include the socialism-inspired experObama’s rampage and the resulting mouniments of the USSR, China, Vietnam, Korea, tain of dead countryman he stands atop Cambodia and the countries in the Eastern Bloc, then we find it’s normally about 19% of rather than abort their beliefs for a better the population that needs to die, in order to future. Ironically, this brings us to the highest death quota the Left accept: the paradigm benefit — in a generous estimate — 80% of case of abortion, with a ratio of one death for the survivors. The 19% fatality allowance is only two lives improved. a curious limit considering the typical antiQ.E.D violence stance of the Left.

To see the calculations for this article and Let’s consider another issue close to the to see what your threshold of slaughter would hearts of people on the left: capital punishbe, an interactive spreadsheet can be found at: ment. It has long been held that no one http://goo.gl/Mt848 should be killed by the state, not even if it

If someone thinks socialism is still worth one more try, then they are asserting that the benefit to the inhabitants of a new socialist society is worth, if not the cumulative total of all deaths from past attempts at socialist utopias , then at least the historical average amount of citizens you need to kill to get one going.

Agony Angus

Life, to me, is a series of false limits and my challenge as an athlete is to explore those limits on a bike.

LANCE ARMSTRONG, Recently stripped of his seven Tour de France titles due to doping allegations.

WORONI BOOKCLUB

Dear Overcome, You’re not completely bent – but you’re not Dear Agony Uncle, right either. Not that there’s anything wrong Some of you may remember Aunty Flo from Just the other day I was enjoying a little with being a poof. Fuck, I’d love to sink beers previous editions of The Back Page. Unfortudown-time on Spankwire, when something and watch the footy with Barnzo, and then nately, our beloved wise woman has decided rather queer occurred. I happened across enjoy a bit of slap and tickle with him durto hang up her pinafores. Luckily, she’s put some enthusiastic anal horseplay – one of life’s ing half time. Instead I’ve got bloody Stacy us in touch with another advice columnist. simple pleasures. At the climax of copulation, yelling at me to put on my good flannie so Introducing.. Agony Angus. Telling it like it I came to the realization that the relevant we can go see her parents. No more chick is, AA answers your relationship/ university/ arsehole belonged not to a lady but rather flicks, never have to hear about what Tamara life queries and quandaries. Write in with a gruff, Mediterranean gentlemen. Am I a said at work, leaving the toilet seat up – you your questions at contact@woroni.com.au friend of Dorothy? beauty! I’m more jealous than my mate Balls Signed, was when he had to work instead of coming Overcome to SummerNats with the boys!

AA