Bridal Guide - The Bristol Press - 01-27-2013

Sunday, January 27, 2013 | 1

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What not to serve at your wedding reception Page 4 Top wedding songs for 2013 Page 5 Southington bridal show inspires ideas Page 6 Entertaining tips for the newlywed couple Page 8 Managing an interfaith wedding Page 10 Smart packing for a smooth honeymoon Page 11

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Seating your wedding guests METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

Weddings are filled with many emotions: happiness; excitement ; and anticipation to name a few.

With all of the positive emotions a wedding may drum up, in the mix there may be a few negative ones, including feelings of being overwhelmed at all the details that need to be completed on a deadline.

One aspect of wedding planning that tends to send people into panic is wedding reception seating arrangements. The thought of having 200 friends and family members together under one roof — and then attempting to seat them next to an acceptable group of people — can cause some couples to hyperventilate.

Every family has its ups and downs, and there are certain people who get along well and a few who clash. Ensuring that a wedding is memorable for all the right reasons (and not for the brawl at table 3) is why seating arrangements are so important. Many couples can use a little advice when seating guests, while others would love another person to handle the seating arrangements for them.

Here are some guidelines for setting up reception seating arrangements. ∎ Place yourselves, as well as the bridal party, at a separate table that is in a prime location in the room. Be sure to allow the spouses or dates of bridal party

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Floral terms every bride and groom should know for their wedding planning METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

Seating your wedding guests can be a breeze with a little advance planning and consideration.

members at the same table so couples remain together. ∎ Some couples choose to seat both sets of parents at one table together — the parents’ table.

Grandparents may also be seated at this table, depending on the number of people each table can accommodate. ∎ If children under the age of 7 are invited, they should be seated with their parents. Children between ages 7 and 14 can be seated at a separate kids’ table. ∎ Be mindful of guests with disabilities or mobility issues. Seat them close to the door, bathrooms or food station. ∎ Instead of separating the bride and the groom’s family to separate sides, intermingle the

tables to promote conversation. ∎ Consider arranging guests by common interests at each table, seating business associates or parents’ friends together. ∎ Take into consideration people who have relationship rifts and try to seat them separately.

But don’t stress about this too much because it won’t be possible to accommodate everyone. You’ll have to hope that at your wedding a certain level of decorum will preside. ∎ It’s not unheard of to let guests seat themselves. This takes the pressure of finding a seat for everyone and enables you to think about the other tasks at hand.

This can take place at a buffet wedding or a smaller affair.

Before discussing table settings for their weddings, many couples find it helpful to brush up on some floral terminology before visiting florists.

First consider the kind of flowers you want at your wedding. Whatever your preference, the added ambiance of a few well-placed blooms or a stylish bouquet can really add to the overall atmosphere of your big day. Knowing the right floral terms can make you appear more knowledgeable and prepared if you understand what will be discussed and are able to choose what you want. With today’s trends as diverse as a wildflower bouquet, you’re guaranteed to find something that will fit in with your wedding’s theme, no matter how traditional or cutting-edge you want it to be.

Here are some florist terms that can be advantageous to know. ∎ Biedermeier: A nosegay arranged tightly with concentric circles of differently colored flowers. The flowers are wired into a holder with only one type of flower in each ring.

∎ Bouquet: A dense bunch of blooms that are kept together in a bouquet holder, wired or tied with ribbon. ∎ Crescent: One full flower and a flowering stem wired together to form a slender handle that is held in one hand. ∎ Garden: A centerpiece featuring wildflowers. ∎ Nosegay: Small, round bouquets composed of densely packed round flowers and fill. ∎ Oasis: Specialized foam that is used in bouquet holders and centerpieces to retain water and keep blooms fresh. ∎ Pomander: A flower-covered ball that is suspended from a ribbon. It is often carried by child attendants. ∎ Posies: Smaller than nosegays but similar in design. ∎ Presentation: A bunch of long-stemmed flowers cradled in the bride’s arms. It’s sometimes known as a pageant bouquet. ∎ Topiary: Flowers trimmed into geometric shapes. ∎ Tossing: A smaller copy of the bride’s bouquet to use in the bouquet toss. ∎ Tussy mussy: A small, metallic holder to carry a posy.

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Couples should take note on what not to serve METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

Couples often fret over what to serve their guests at the reception, and rightfully so.

Reception costs can comprise a majority of the wedding-day budget.

When spending $100 or more per guest, you want to ensure you’re getting what you paid for and that guests enjoy what they’re eating.

Filet mignon may be a good choice, but steak tartare is prob-

ably best avoided. Find out which foods to avoid serving your wedding guests. ∎ Exotic cuisine: You may be a risk taker when it comes to cuisine, but others may not share your zeal for exotic foods.

Now is not the time to introduce guests to the wild and wacky. If you’ve seen an exotic dish on the Food Network or the Travel Channel, give it a try another time. ∎ Anything on fire: Why

risk an accident for a spectacle?

Baked alaska, cherries jubilee, apples flambe ... these are foods that might provide a show, but the cost of that show may not be worth it in the end. ∎ Raw food: Clams on the halfshell or sushi-grade tuna may seem like good ideas, but keep in mind that it is hard to ensure quality when feeding 200 people at the same time. Foods that require special refrigeration or immediate service for

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freshness are best left for other occasions. Don’t risk food poisoning on a room full of people unless you want your wedding to be remembered for stomach cramps. ∎ A long, s i t - d ow n meal: Two or three courses is fine, but if guests have to sit through a never-ending parade of courses, that limits their ability to mingle and have a good time. ∎ Anything too elaborate: The faster servers can get food out to guests the better. If they have to sit there piping mashed potato roses on dishes or assemble intricate canapes, the delay might not be worth the presentation. And remember, the more bells and whistles, the higher the price tag. ∎ Fast food: This is your wedding, and you want the food to fit with the scale of the day. A formal wedding generally includes a formal meal.

Although it may be alright to include some fast food inspired dishes at the cocktail buffet, steer clear of burgers and fries for the main meal.

∎ Themed food: Don’t dye that baked potato purple because you want the wedding to be a plum-colored affair.

Also, it’s best to avoid themed food, unless it is part of a cultural wedding or can be pulled off with class. It’s much easier to pass off crepes and croissants for a Parisian wedding than giant turkey legs and tankards of ale for a Renaissancethemed one. ∎ No food at all: Whether your wedding is small or grand in scale, guests will expect some sort of food. Be sure to have some butler-passed hors d’oeuvres or some well-placed pickings for guests to grab while mingling.

After all, they will need something to provide the energy to mingle and dance, and food can help buffer the effects of too many cocktails.

Now is not the time to introduce guests to the wild and wacky.

If you’ve seen an exotic dish on the Food Network or the Travel Channel, give it a try another time.

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Sensible tips for trying on wedding dresses

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Many brides-to-be look forward to the day when they visit a bridal salon and are able to try on gowns for the first time.

There are certain tips that can make the day go much more smoothly and potentially reduce the amount of time it may take to find the perfect gown. ∎ Wear a supportive, well constructed strapless bra or corset in your correct size. If you will be wearing a petticoat, also have the right size available. ∎ Go without face makeup when trying on gowns so they remain clean. ∎ Try to wear your hair similar to the style you have in mind for your wedding. ∎ Note that the size of the wedding gown you will wear is typically one to two sizes larger than your day-to-day clothes.

Proper measurements can be matched to designers’ size charts. ∎ It’s best to limit the number of people with whom you shop to 1 or 2 trusted friends or family members. An entourage can be confusing. ∎ It’s always better to order a slightly larger gown and leave room for alterations if you are between sizes.

TOP WEDDING SONGS IN 2013: 1. “Marry Me” — Train 2. “Come Away With Me” — Nora Jones 3. “Make You Feel My Love” — Adele 4. “You And Me” — Dave Matthews 5. “All My Life” — K-Ci & Jojo 6. “The Way You Look Tonight” — Frank Sinatra 7. “Then” — Brad Paisley (Ladies You Remember “The Notebook”) 8. “Just A Kiss” — Lady Antebellum 9. “I Do” — Colbie Caillat 10. “Marry You” — Bruno Mars

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Aqua Turf packed for 23rd annual Bridal Show

program.

Their wedding is planned for SOUTHINGTON — From August. the bouquet wrap to the barrette, “We tried on hundreds of dressthe bride wears in her hair, every- es; this is the girl that never wanted thing and anything that goes into to even wear a dress when she was planning a wedding was on display little,” her mom said Sunday as at the 23rd Annual the two browsed Bridal Show held at through the show, the Aqua Turf Club more out of curiSunday earlier this osity, because their month. planning is basiVendors were cally complete. local and from all The same across the state, as was the case for were the brides-toJenn Gugliotti of be, their fiances and Wolcott, walkfamilies, who waning around with NICOLE ANGLIS dered around the one of her “best Bride-to-be large banquet hall bridesmaids” tasting cake samDanielle Zercie. ples and gathering Gugliotti’s dress information. actually happened to be on display Mothers and daughters were at one of the vendor booths, and common, like Southington resi- it’s just about the only part of dents Nicole Anglis, 26, and her her ceremony that she’s keeping mom, Susan Cyr. a secret.

Anglis (soon-to-be Edmond) “Most of my planning is done met Gus, her husband-to-be already because I’m OCD,” she sunglasses.” Although most of the and a Berlin resident, while they said, laughing. “My dress is very crowd was made up of plannerboth attended Southington High sparkly because I’m a sparkly per- types — which is why they might School’s Vocational Agriculture son; I told people they’ll need See SOUTHINGTON, Page 7

By ERICA SCHMITT STAFF WRITER

‘Most of my planning is done already because I’m OCD.’

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Top, Debbie Campochiaro, left, of Plainville-based floral salon Always Bloomin’, helps bride-to-be Sally Cubeta of Portland.

On bottom, the catwalk at the Aqua Turf Country Club in Plantsville showcasing some wedding fashions for the guys during the 23rd annual Bridal Show recently.

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Sunday, January 27, 2013 | 7

Southington show presents brides new ideas, information Continued from Page 6

attend such an expo for a one-day affair — there was a place for spontaneity at Sunday’s show.

A Vegas-esque wedding chapel was available, complete with an on-call Justice of the Peace for the couples who just couldn’t wait anymore.

Local vendors included Plainville-based dress boutique A Beautiful Bride and florist Always Bloomin’, which presented a live human display, glimmering in silver and striking poses to attract passers-by.

The store’s technical manager and photographer, Danielle Anderson, of New Britain, was the one in the costume.

“She does everything for the shop,” explained Artistic Director Theresa Sakowicz.

“We work individually with each bride and we’re willing to work with any budget,” she added.

About 80 percent of the store’s sales are wedding-related.

The most popular wedding flowers right now? Anemones, succulent and lamb’s ear.

Bristol resident and Wedding Photographer Diane Amend sat in a booth across from the live display, sharing her work and talking to families.

“It’s more fun than it is work,” she said.

In another room was Southington’s own Cork & Brew, whose claim to fame is being the only place in Connecticut where people can come to design their own beer, wine and soda. Make it, bottle and label it, then take it home, actually. Or serve it as a table favor at your wedding reception, even as gifts for the wedding party.

These types of brewing boutiques are common in Canada, but not so much in the United States.

“A lot of people do it for the holidays, anniversaries and weddings,” Annalisa Russell-Smith | Staff said Owner Kristin Michalski, Debbie Campochiaro, left, of Plainville-based floral salon Always Bloomin’, helps bride-to-be Sally Cubeta of Portwho made a trip up north to see land, with choices at the 23rd annual Bridal Show at the Aqua Turf Country Club in Southington recently. how such a business was run before she opened her own down here.

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Creating a delicious and unforgettable party together METROCREATIVWE GRAPHICS

Part of the fun of getting married and establishing a home together is sharing your new life — and showing off all your exciting wedding presents — with friends and family. Hosting parties and get-togethers is part of a typical rite of passage for newlyweds, and like any new venture, can lead to some anxiety. Janice Rassin, National Bridal Director at Meyer Corporation, U.S., the largest cookware company in America, offers numerous creative ways for newlyweds to entertain with confidence and ease.

Ease into your entertaining groove with brunch Inviting guests over for a weekend brunch is a smart way to begin honing your entertaining skills. The food is comforting and familiar, and most of the set-up, such as brewing coffee, squeezing fresh orange juice and baking muffins, can be done in advance. Pull out your new cookware to prepare a simple and irresistible menu of scrambled

eggs with fresh chives and lox, or classic blueberry pancakes. A high performance nonstick skillet or griddle from Anolon, a leading gourmet cookware brand at bridal registries, is essential to ensure your eggs and flapjacks, which are both prone to sticking, will release effortlessly every time. If you’d rather serve dishes that can be made ahead of time, consider a savory egg strata with layers of grated cheese, potatoes and sliced ham, or a scrumptious oven-baked version of praline French toast. Either Southernstyle recipe can be prepared and served in Paula Deen’s Southern Gathering au gratins or casseroles. Crafted from durable oven to table stoneware with a unique embossed pattern, the new, nostalgically designed and versatile collection is oven-, microwave-, freezer- and dishwasher-safe.

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You can set the game rules and theme for your friendly contest with your guests’ input in advance, and share the task of bringing key ingredients and kitchen equipment that will be needed to cook together for a spirited evening of food fun. Your theme could be as simple as who can make the best meatloaf, or who can beat the clock preparing the best-tasting chicken pasta dish in under 30 minutes.

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Unsweetened cocoa is a chef ’s secret weapon to adding complexity and depth to hearty stews and chili, and dessert options for chocolate are practically endless.

Keep the chocolate concept sizzling at the table by serving dishes in handsomely crafted Circulon Symmetry in Chocolate pots and pans. True to its name, this new collection of gourmet nonstick cookware features a rich, chocolate hued exterior. Besides looking smart in the kitchen or on the table, Circulon Symmetry is oven safe to 400 degrees Fahrenheit, dishwasher-safe, and compatible with all cooktops.

Creating an inviting ambiance for a dinner or cocktail party can be as easy as focusing on a favorite color and letting this be your guide and inspiration. You can integrate color into your invite, develop a signature color drink, use one kind of flower for centerpieces, and serve foods from vessels that play up the color theme as well.

If red is your passion, start by welcoming guests with a tray of pomegranate martinis and finish the evening with cherry or cranberry tarts for dessert. Bring your food straight from the oven to the table using stylish cookware, such Take the party outdoors as Circulon Contempo Red, a new collection of dishwasher-safe gourmet nonstick pots and pans In climates and seasons that are with a vibrant red exterior. conducive to spending time outChoose a Favorite Ingredient side, invite your guests to dine al as Your Party Theme Inspiration: fresco on your deck, patio or garAnother fun way to plan a See TIPS, Page 9

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Tips for newlyweds on entertaining with ease and flair

Continued from Page 8

den. Guests enjoy the informality of being outdoors, and the fresh air stimulates both conversation and appetites.

Highlight the “outdoorsy” venue of your soiree by setting a table inspired by nature. Choose natural fibers for linens and placemats, and pluck fresh garden herbs, such as rosemary and basil to create simple, botanical centerpieces.

For your dinnerware, a playful and affordable option that’s perfect for an outdoor party is Little Hoot — a new tabletop collection from Rachael RayTM. The new porcelain collection features an adorable owl motif nestled on a tree’s multi-hued leaves.

Little Hoot comes in large sets for complete place settings, as well as smaller sets of dinner plates, salad plates and other items.

Embrace the potluck Potluck-style parties, whereby guests bring a prepared dish to share, is very much back in vogue — and a boon to time-strapped

and budget-conscious hosts.

You can modify a traditional potluck dinner by taking the lead in recommending dishes that will create a cohesive menu of complementary recipes.

For a dash more creativity, consider giving your potluck a special theme, such as dishes from a favorite vacation locale (perhaps even where you went for your honeymoon), or favorite dishes from a beloved cuisine, such as Italian or Asian.

You’ll want your own recipes for the potluck to be generously sized for entertaining, and prepared in attractive pots that can be brought straight from the range or oven to the table.

Anolon gourmet cookware offers two beautifully designed options that are potluck-ready: new Anolon Nouvelle Copper Stainless Steel 4-Quart Covered Chef Casserole, and the Anolon Advanced Bronze 5.25-Quart Covered Sauteuse Pan. Both of these hard-working and durable pots quickly and evenly distribute heat to prevent hot spots, and feature short side

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Casual flair to honor traditions Annual celebrations, such as Passover and Easter, reunite families at the table with timehonored traditions that are passed down from generation to generation.

Honoring your heritage and cherished traditions does not mean you need to break out the fine silver, crystal and china.

It’s easier than ever to create an elegant holiday table using casual, dishwasher- and microwave oven-safe tabletop made from durable porcelain and stoneware.

Paula Deen, the “Grand Dame” of Southern hospitality, is a master at saluting tradition without formality at the table.

Paula’s flair for entertaining is evident in her new Paula Deen Tabletop crafted in durable porcelain and stoneware. Perfect for spring or fall holiday gatherings, Tatnall Street is a porcelain dinnerware collection offered Above, dutch ovens, non-stick griddles and copper-bottomed Anolon gourin complementary Bluebell and met cookware helps any budding chef to get a head start in the kitchen.

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Managing the intricacies woven within an interfaith wedding METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

Faith plays an important role in many people’s lives, perhaps even more so when it comes time to celebrate a wedding. However, couples who do not share the same faith may have to make some compromises.

Although romantic feelings may transcend faith, heritage and other factors that make people so different, individuals who are quite religious often find that there are some challenges to getting married to someone outside their own faith.

Depending on the faith, some religions will not honor a wedding that does not conform to their strict guidelines for a wedding within the faith.

Oftentimes, this means that both participants need to have been raised according to the faith, including meeting certain religious milestones throughout their lives.

For example, Catholics must have been baptised, received communion and been confirmed under the auspices of the Catholic church before being allowed to marry. They must

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present official certificates of these sacraments in order to receive a religious Catholic wedding.

Those of the Jewish faith may believe in a “bashert,” a belief that everyone has a soul mate. According to the Talmud, 40 days before a male child is conceived a voice from heaven announces whose daughter he is going to marry.

In Yiddish, this perfect match is called “bashert,” a word meaning fate or destiny. The bashert is typically one who is also Jewish.

To handle the intricacies of an interfaith marriage, it is wise to speak to clergy in your respective religions to see what will be required of you as a couple. There could be workarounds, depending

on what the couple decide.

Some couples feel it is in their best interest if either one of them converts to the other’s religion so that the ceremony is easier. Others choose to hold two distinct religious ceremonies if the officiants are lenient in their rules to allow it to happen.

In other cases, couples feel it is better to have a nondenominational wedding to avoid any obstacles. Even though this ceremony will not be sanctioned by either church, the couple can still choose to include prayers and customs specific to their faiths in the ceremony.

Many couples decide that their mutual love and happiness is reason enough for an interfaith wedding, even if that means sacrificing acceptance by their clergy and church.

Interfaith couples should begin wedding planning early to discover what will be expected of them to have the wedding they desire.

Some religions will not honor a wedding that does not conform to their strict guidelines for a wedding within the faith.

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Couples of the Jewish faith often spend their wedding ceremony underneath a “chuppah.”

This is a canopy or covering made from a cloth or sheet stretched over four poles.

The chuppah may be freestanding, or it may be held aloft by members of the wed-

ding party.

According to tradition, the chuppah symbolizes the home the couple will build together.

Although a chuppah isn’t a required component of the ceremony and couples will be recognized as married without it, in more cases than not, a chuppah is an integral part of the ceremony.

Where did ‘honeymoon’ come from?

METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

It has become tradition for married couples to jet off on a post-wedding vacation.

This honeymoon is a way for the bride and groom to enjoy quiet time together and start off their married life together on an intimate level.

Although the word “honeymoon” has happy connotations today, the original meanings of the word may not be so blissful.

There are varying accounts of the evolution of the word “honeymoon,” but many believe it to be a Norse tradition deriving from the word “hjunottsmanathr.”

Northern European history describes women being abducted from their families

and forced into marriage with a man from a neighboring village.

This husband would take his new bride into hiding and stay there for a while until it was certain the bride’s family had given up the hunt and retreated.

It was also tradition for Scandinavian couples to drink a sweet, honey-infused wine known as mead for a month after getting married.

This may be where the “honey,” for the sweet drink, and the “moon,” for the one-month period of time, originated.

Others say “honeymoon” refers to a sarcastic quip that a marriage starts out sweet as honey, but then wanes much as the moon will each cycle.

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Chuppah: a Jewish wedding tradition

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Take time to pack wisely for a smooth honeymoon METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

Smart packing is an essential preparation for a stress-free honeymoon.

Nevertheless, anyone can become a packing pro with a few guidelines. ∎ If you don’t already have a suitcase, choose a design with a hard case. This way it won’t expand while packing, and there’s no chance it will ever exceed the size limits. ∎ Roll clothes because it will limit wrinkling. ∎ Use a layering technique to

fit a multitude of items and protect against displacement during transit. ∎ Fill the bottom of the suitcase with the heavier items: shoes, jeans, jackets, and any gear or tech items. ∎ Next, layer dresses and slacks so they lay lengthwise on top of the first layer of items. It’s okay if the ends extend over the edge of the suitcase.

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∎ Shirts and sweaters — if applicable — can be rolled and then layered next. Use any overhanging slacks and dresses to fold over the shirts and keep them in place. ∎ Lightweight items, like lingerie and undergarments, can be placed on top. Also, include toiletries that are sealed in leakproof bags. ∎ Be sure to know air-

line requirements in advance.

While some restrictions have been lifted, the Traffic Safety Administration and the airlines themselves may have rules regarding how much liquid or sharp items you can bring along. ∎ Keep important documents, such as tickets, reservation numbers and emergency contacts, with you in a travel bag. Any prescriptions you need should be carried as well. ∎ Place an emergency outfit in your carry-on in the event your luggage is lost or temporarily detained. ∎ Consider packing lightly and buying some necessities at your destination. ∎ Sometimes it is less expensive to ship items instead of paying airline baggage fees.

Investigate these options, especially on the return trip. ∎ Take advantage of laundry service on honeymoons so you won’t return with a bag full of dirty items that need laundering right away.

Also, doing laundry on your trip limits the number of things you need to pack because you can wash and rewear. ∎ Make the most of the honeymoon by packing early. Come your travel day, you can simply hop in the car and look forward to the vacation ahead.

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When basking in the afterglow of a momentous wedding, most couples would rather think about scores of other things than packing for their honeymoons.

But with ever-changing restrictions on what and how much a person can bring along on airlines and other modes of travel, packing is something that eventually must be done.

According to the Honeymoon Study 2010 by The Wedding Report, a Wedding Statistics and Market Research organization, 81 percent of newly married couples take a honeymoon.

The top honeymoon destination for those in North America is the Caribbean, where the average couple will spend $3,500 on their honeymoon.

Although 15 percent choose to cruise to their destinations, the remaining likely drive or fly.

Despite how the couple plans to travel to their honeymoon destination, packing becomes an essential part of the honeymoon planning.

Some people are good at packing and can execute the task rather easily.

Others are left with a bulging suitcase that won’t pass muster at security clearance or meet size and weight guidelines imposed by airlines.

12 | Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Herald Press

WEDDINGS

Advantages to consider in having a wedding video METROCREATIVE GRAPHICS

In a financial climate where most people are pinching pennies, it comes as no surprise that many engaged couples seek ways to cut costs with regard to their weddings. Some couples are undecided whether certain components of their wedding are necessary.

The decision to hire a videographer is one such area couples fret over. After all, with a photographer snapping hundreds of pictures, having a video may seem like an unnecessary luxury.

However, people often find that having a wedding video to cherish long after the day has passed is well worth the price.

There are several advantages to hiring a professional videographer to capture the day. A professionally produced wedding video is not the same as Uncle Fred carrying around his archaic camcorder and catching a few embarrassing dance moves during the reception. A professional video will showcase all moments of the wedding from perspectives not easily captured by photography. In addition to showcasing the images of the wedding, the video will also share the sounds and emotions of

the day. Here are some things to think about. ∎ Choose a videographer who will work in conjunction with the wedding mood and parameters. You probably don’t want a videographer who uses bright lights that can be distracting. Nor do you want a videographer who pushes the camera in guests’ faces for a less-than-candid interview.

Today’s professionals are inconspicuous and simply record the events as they unfold. ∎ The videographer often works in tandem with the photographer. Some photographers have a videographer on staff. But it is fine to bring in your own if you like the quality of the photographer’s photos but not the videographer’s work. ∎ A videographer will capture the things you may have missed during the busy day. He or she can serve as the eyes and ears for the things you’re not seeing and hearing. ∎ Although ours is an increasingly digital world where people capture photos and videos on their smartphones and other devices on a regular basis, a wedding video can serve as a family memento.

What other time, apart from the

holidays, do you have all of your friends and loved ones together in one place? ∎ Although no one wants to think of a friend or relative passing away while planning their wedding, the fact remains that after a few years some of the people who attended your wedding may no longer be around. Having a wedding video may be the only last moving image and sound of a special person who is no longer in your life. ∎ Sound is a portion of the wedding that photos simply cannot capture. To relive the music and the words of the day, a videographer is a necessity. Professionals who use wireless microphones will produce a video with the best sound quality. ∎ You can work with a good videographer so it’s not simply a video with close-up shots of your face or unflattering perspectives. Talk about your preferences and even fears about being filmed (some people just don’t like watching themselves on TV), and the videographer can no doubt find solutions that will accommodate your needs. ∎ There are many things that you will not see at the wedding

A video can help preserve the tender moments of your wedding day for generations to come.

but may have liked to, such as the first gasps of wonder upon guests walking into the reception room, or the tears on the face of an aunt who was sitting too far back in the church pews. This is where a wedding video can prove invaluable.

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Although brides and grooms may be cutting co

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Sunday, January 27, 2013 | 13

WEDDINGS

The Herald Press

Knowing the secrets to a long, happy and healthy marriage Some might say a long celebrity marriage is one that endures the duration of the newly betrothed’s trip down the aisle.

We’ve seen Britney Spears dissolve a marriage after 55 hours and Kim Kardashian call it quits after 72 days.

It seems even money can’t buy matrimonial happiness.

But some couples have been together for 50, 60 years and say they’re still as much in love as they were the day they spoke their “I dos.” What do they know that others do not?

According to clinical psychologist and relationship guru Dr. Phil McGraw, “We all need to be flexible and to compromise in marriage, but you’ve got to be true to your core traits and characteristics, what I call your authentic self.”

Some couples enter a relationship projecting a persona they believe the other person wants — one that really isn’t what they’re all about.

This could be a woman trying to fill the role of her husband’s nurturing mom or a guy playing the protector to his wife.

In reality, marriage is more of a partnership, and truth and trust are often at the basis of good marriages.

There are many other “secrets” that marriage experts will offer to couples seeking the magic formula.

Whether you’re pondering marriage or have already tied the knot, consider the following advice to make a marriage endure for the long haul. ∎ There’s no such thing as the perfect marriage. Some couples create an image of what they think marriage is supposed to be, and that image that often goes “poof ” once reality sets in. Even soulmates are bound to frustrate or irritate one another from time to time. ∎ Couples should express their frustrations. Bottling up frustra-

tions can eat at a person and eventually destroy a marriage.

Talking about the things that are bothering you with your partner opens up a discussion and can help you work through things. ∎ Divorce should not be seen as a viable option. Couples who want to bail on the marriage at every turn could be directing their energy toward divorce as the only solution instead of discovering ways to remove the cause of strife.

Divorce can sometimes be the easy way out when you think about the work that goes into keeping a marriage working.

Experts say that there are a few issues, like adultery, abuse and drug/alcohol addiction, that may be reasonable catalysts for divorce if personal safety and sanity is being compromised. ∎ Make time for romance.

It’s easily said but not so easily done. Too often married couples forget what it was like to date when all of their attention was spent on each other instead of the house, kids, work, etc.

Today there seems to be even more distractions, from e-mails to texts to pressure and obligations at the office. Happy couples find the time to spend quality time with their spouses — even if that’s only 10 minutes of alone time a day. ∎ Put “we” first. Many people operate on a “me” mentality.

When you’re part of a couple, give more to your spouse than you take. If he or she is doing the same, you’re working collectively for the benefit of the marriage instead of yourselves. ∎ Respect each other. Often couples having troubles realize they treat strangers better than they treat each other. Would use the insults or unflattering terms that you sometimes throw at your spouse with a complete stranger?

Probably not.

Good marriages are based on a foundation of respect and love. It’s easy to lose feelings of love if the respect is gone.

In reality, marriage is more of a partnership, and truth and trust are often at the basis of good marriages.

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14 | Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Herald Press

WEDDINGS

Remember the comforts of home for overnight guests Families are spread out across the country, making travel common When your parents or grandparents got married, there was a good chance that their closest relatives and friends lived nearby — in the neighborhood.

Attending the wedding was easy, and everyone headed home afterward.

This scenario is not too common nowadays. Many families have spread out across the country, or even the world, making travel a significant component of modern weddings.

As a result, couples must take accommodations into consideration when planning their nuptials.

Couples cannot expect relatives to travel to their wedding, party into the wee hours of the morning and then be responsible for finding a place to stay.

It is common courtesy for hotel rooms to be made available to out-of-town guests.

Although most couples reserve a block of rooms for guests, a

bride and groom really looking to go above and beyond will choose to cover the cost of these rooms as a gift.

To ensure there will be available rooms for guests, it is important to contact an area hotel (or hotels) well in advance of your wedding.

To start, find out if the reception site you will be using has an agreement or relationship with an area hotel. In some cases, nearby businesses will offer a courtesy discount to facilitate foot traffic.

A wedding consultant should know about packages that may include discounts on lodging.

If there is no package deal, start cold-calling hotels. If you have a discount program or frequency rewards card with a particular hotel chain, start with them first.

Most hotels require a minium of 10 rooms be reserved to secure a “block.”

There’s a good chance the greater the number of rooms reserved, the more competitive

the nightly rate will be. Find out about cancellation policies or when guests need to make a reservation in order to secure the discounted rate.

You can include information about hotel reservations right in your wedding invitation, including a code or number to mention to get the wedding discount.

If you’re tech-savvy, you may have a link to the hotel’s booking Web site or information on your wedding Web page.

Either way, be sure there is ample time for guests to make a decision concerning their hotel reservations.

As an added courtesy to guests, you can arrange shuttle bus service between the reception site and the hotel.

This way guests who may have imbibed too much during the party do not need to worry about transportation to the hotel.

However, they will have to make arrangements to retrieve their cars the following day.

Fresh clean linens are a welcome comfort when far from home.

It may pay to have your wed- more they will feel pampered and ding on a Sunday so guests are believe the decision to travel for entitled to the free breakfast many your wedding was the right one. hotels offer to business customers during the week.

Otherwise, find out if there will be a meal available to guests the following day and offer to pay for it.

The more pleasantries you can provide to your guests, the

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Sunday, January 27, 2013 | 15

WEDDINGS

The Herald Press

WEDDING DIRECTORY 2013 A P PA R E L Irene’s Lingerie

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BANQUETS & C AT E R I N G Aria by Villa Rosa

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Manor Inn Restaurant

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Milldale (Southington) CT 06467 860-628-9877 manorinnrestaurant.com

Testa’s Banquet Facilities 26 South Center St. Southington, CT 860-628-8509

C AT E R I N G Angelo’s Market & Catering

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Cafe Buono

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La Bella Vista

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The Gallery

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Mahan’s Lakeview & Fine Catering

Maneeley’s

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222 Main St. Portland, CT 860-342-5361 www.theweddingdressllc.com

BRIDAL ONE-STOP SHOPPING Bristol Commons & The Annex

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CAKES A N D FAVO R S Bolo Bakery

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Harvest Bakery

84 Farmington Ave. Bristol, CT 860-589-8000 www.theharvestbakery.com

DANCE LESSONS US Dance Club

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DENTISTRY Southington Dentistry

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F LO R A L D E S I G N Hubbard Florist 133 North St., Bristol 860-583-4184 www.hubbardsflorist.com

Marzi Florist

33 Fern St., New Britain, CT 860-229-1331 www.marziflorist.com

F O R M A LW E A R Oscar’s Formalwear

1650 West Street Southington, CT 06489 860-628-5566

HAIR & BEAUTY Sassu Cuts

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MAKE-UP Beauty by Garuti Russell Garuti

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JEWELRY DBK Jewelers

41 East St., Plainville, CT 06062 860-747-3374

Shannon’s Diamonds and Fine Jewelry, Inc. 74 Farmington Avenue Bristol, CT 06010 860-582-8858

PHOTOGRAPHY Premiere Portrait

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RECEPTION & BANQUET Indian Hill Country Club

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Krystal Gardens

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The Grand Oak Villa

550 Sylvan Lake Rd. Oakville, CT 860-945-0548 www.thegrandoakvilla.com

The Lily Lake Inn

66 Central Ave. Wolcott, CT 06717 203-879-7000 www.lilylakeinn.com

R E N TA L S Connecticut Rental Center

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T RAV E L Scully Travel

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Wollenberg’s/ TLC Limousine

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16 | Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Herald Press

WEDDINGS

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