Yes! Weekly - May 3, 2017

BREATHE LOUNGE

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YARN

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GEARS&GUITARS FEST MAY 26-29

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MAY

F r 5 MINGO FISHTRAP Sa 6 Su 7 Fr 12 Fr 12

w/Brian Dunne

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Mingo Fishtrap

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MAY 3-9, 2017 VOLUME 13, NUMBER 18

7:30p

SPRINTER METALFEST 7p LIVE/DEAD ‘69 7p PULSE: Electronic Dance Party GREENSKY BLUEGRASS

5500 Adams Farm Lane Suite 204 Greensboro, NC 27407 Office 336-316-1231 Fax 336-316-1930

9p

w/Joshua Davis This Show is @ THE RITZ RALEIGH Sa 13 MOTHERS FINEST w/Doby 7p Mo 15 REAL ESTATE w/Frankie Cosmos

Mothers Finest

Publisher CHARLES A. WOMACK III publisher@yesweekly.com

Sat May 13

We 17 MAYDAY PARADE

EDITORIAL Editor JEFF SYKES jeff@yesweekly.com

w/Knuckle Puck / Milestones 7p

Fr 19 METAL MIKE’S 50th BASH 8p Sa 20 BETTER OFF DEAD(Grateful Dead)

DARK DAYS OF SORROW

w/Moon Water (WP tribute) Th 25 FRANZ FERDINAND w/Omni 7p

Sa 27 CAPLETON Sa 3 Su 4 Fr 9 Fr 16

8p

JUNE

DELTA RAE @ CATS CRADLE AFTON MUSIC SHOWCASE MARCO BENEVENTO 8p TURNPIKE TROUBADOURS 7:30

Harrison Reid’s farm was a place of laughter, lively conversation and natural beauty. Located near the Moravian community of Friedland in Winston-Salem, the farm was a popular destination for Moravian Mon May 15 Sunday school outings and picnics.

Real Estate

w/Frenchie’s Blues Destroyers

Fr 23 OLD 97’s Fr 30 RED NOT CHILI PEPPERS JULY

8

Thu May 25

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19

Sa 1 LUCERO w/Banditos 8p F r 7 THE BREAKFAST CLUB

w/The Harmony House Singers

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Franz Ferdinand

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Greensky @The Bluegrass Ritz Adv. Tickets @Lincolntheatre.com & Schoolkids Records All Shows All Ages

MAY 3-9, 2017

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Marketing BRAD MCCAULEY brad@yesweekly.com TRAVIS WAGEMAN travis@yesweekly.com

Sat May 27

Fri May 12

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AUSTIN KINDLEY artdirector@yesweekly.com

Advertising Manager KATHARINE OSBORNE

8P

Su 30 HELLYEAH w/Kyng / Cane Hill 8p 8 - 2 MICHELLE BRANCH 9 - 2 NEVERMIND w/Joe Hero

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Sa 22 INTERSTELLAR BOYS Fr 28 BERES HAMMOND

Contributors KRISTI MAIER JOHN ADAMIAN MARK BURGER RICH LEWIS STEVE MITCHELL BILLY INGRAM ALLISON STALBERG IAN MCDOWELL DEONNA KELLI SAYED MIA OSBORN

A five-dollar investment gets you a year-long membership and access to an inviting bar/lounge that begs you to inquire and just chill, or you know….

BREATHE. 10 For a kid growing up in Winston Salem, they were intoxicating not only in their LANGUAGE but in the liminal worlds they pried open, worlds with a rich nuance and texture.

11 The UNCSA School of FILMMAKING’S spring semester is drawing to a close, and that means a fresh selection of student films has been completed.

12 “When I started working on the first YARN record it was just kind of an ex-

Capleton HellYeah Sun July 30

CLAUDIA BURNETT claudia@yesweekly.com

periment, doing an acoustic record,” says Christiana. “I didn’t purposely write songs to sound country. I was veering toward that and wanted it to be like American Beauty.”

19 White, whose solo exhibit of abstract paintings will open at Greensboro’s CVA GALLERY on May 5, has wrestled to bring form to her emotions for most of her life.

20 On May 6, the “fantastic four” stores will team up with Geeksboro Coffee and Beverage Company and the delightfully outrageous women of ... GRAWL Brawl V: We Could Be Heroes, an over-the-top throwdown proving that geeks can be female, muscular and civic-minded.

KAREN SCOTT karen@yesweekly.com Promotion NATALIE GARCIA

DISTRIBUTION JANICE GANTT We at YES! Weekly realize that the interest of our readers goes well beyond the boundaries of the Piedmont Triad. Therefore we are dedicated to informing and entertaining with thought-provoking, debate-spurring, in-depth investigative news stories and features of local, national and international scope, and opinion grounded in reason, as well as providing the most comprehensive entertainment and arts coverage in the Triad.

YES! Weekly welcomes submissions of all kinds. Efforts will be made to return those with a self-addressed stamped envelope; however YES! Weekly assumes no responsibility for unsolicited submissions. YES! Weekly is published every Wednesday by Womack Newspapers, Inc. No portion may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.

First copy is free, all additional copies are $1.00. Copyright 2017 Womack Newspapers, Inc.

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HE ALTH AND STYLE I N S T I T U T E

LOOK GOOD FEEL GREAT SPEND LESS Buy a Full Size

Keratin Shampoo & Conditioner, Receive your choice of a FREE Keratin Treatment or Signature Spa Facial!

Some restrictions apply. May not be combined with other offers.

Expires 5/31/17. While supplies last.

1114 EASTCHESTER DR., HIGH POINT

336-885-3452

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Hours: Tues - Fri 9 a.m. - 8:30 p.m. / Sat 9 a.m. - 4:30 p.m Walk-ins Welcome! Appointments Preferred All work done by supervised future salon professionals.

May 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

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DRINK & FOOD SPECIALS ON

Cinco De Mayo 2 L O C AT I O N S 241 S Marshall Street Winston Salem, NC 336-725-1888

545 Trade Street Winston Salem, NC 336-955-1288

Sun & Mon 11am - 9:30pm | Tue-Thu 11am - 10pm | Fri & Sat 11am - 11pm

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Kid-friendly activities for Cinco de Mayo Dust off your sombrero; it’s time to celebrate Cinco de Mayo! This annual celebration of all things Mexican commemorates an important battle that was won against the French army on May 5, 1862.

Today, the occasion is recognized throughout the United States and is a chance for all to enjoy the finer points of Mexican culture, including the food, music and art of Mexicano people. Here are a few ways to get your kids involved in this

fun and festive event.

MAKE AND BREAK A PIÑATA

Use papier-mâché, a balloon and some paint to create your own piñata. Once it’s dried, fill it with small wrapped candies and treats that your kids can gather.

They’ll take turns using a bat or stick to break open the piñata hanging from a tree and then collect the goodies when they tumble to the ground.

WHAT OUR CLIENTS SAY!

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Plus, winning several Triad’s Best awards always helps!”

Ricardo Aguirre General Manager of Mexico Restaurant West Market St. May 3-9, 2017

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CINCO DE MAY AYO AY YO — SPECIALS —

SAN LUIS

1503 W GATE CITY BLVD, GREENSBORO / 336-851-2158

SAN LUIS II

4207 GATE CITY BLVD GREENSBORO / 336-617-5508

SAN LUIS III

$3.50 12oz MARGARITAS $8.99 60oz PITCHERS (ANY DRAFT) $29.99 120oz TOWER (ANY DRAFT) $1.50 12oz DOMESTIC BOTTLES 99¢ 16oz BUD/BUD LIGHT ALUMINUMS $1.99 12oz MEXICAN BOTTLES $1.50 12oz (ANY DRAFT) $3.99 32oz (ANY DRAFT) $6.99 32oz CORONARITA $2.50 ALL WINE

144 WESTCHESTER DR HIGH POINT / 336-882-2155

Kids can add ingredients to the blender (under close supervision) and then add fun garnishes to their cups like straws, umbrellas and fresh fruit.

• Mexican wedding cookies. Little helpers can mix the batter, roll the dough into balls and dip the cookies in sugar.

DIY EATS AND TREATS

Most kids love being involved in creating their own meals. Good Cinco de Mayo-themed choices for little helping hands include: • Guacamole. Kids of all ages can mash and mix ingredients.

• Tacos. Supply the ingredients and let youngsters build their own.

• Strawberry margarita mocktails.

CASA VALLARTA

3915 BATTLEGROUND AVE GREENSBORO / 336-282-7070

CRAFTY DECOR

When it comes to decorating your home for the occasion, think all things red, white and green. Kids can make chain garlands in these colors or use them to fill in a pre-drawn Mexican flag. DIY maracas are fun for little ones, and older kids who are adept at using scissors can create papel picado streamers with tissue paper.

FRIDAY, MAY 5TH 5:00 p.m.

NO BORDERS OR WALLS HERE! First 50 Customers Receive A FREE SOMBREO! FIESTA HOURS 5-7 p.m. - Music by Stephen Henson 9-12 p.m. - Music by Southern Eyes

Cinco De Mayo celebration

FRI.MAY.5

3870 BETHANIA STATION RD, W-S, NC WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/CBTAVERN (336) 815-1664

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8PM-11PM with PHASE Band

MEXICAN BEER TAP TAKEOVER $2.50 PINTS • $5 MARGARITAS *SPECIAL MEXICAN MENU WILL BE SERVED MON-THU 3 p.m. - 12 a.m. / FRI & SAT 11 a.m. - 12 a.m.

NOW SERVING BRUNCH FRIDAY-SUNDAY 11 a.m. - 2 p.m. , $1 Mimosa Harper Hill Commons Shopping Center / 4926 Country Club Rd. / Winston-Salem, NC (phone) 336-529-6230 / (web) www.macandnellisws.com

May 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

5

EVENTS YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS | BY AUSTIN KINDLEY

be there

LIGHTNIN’ WELLS FRIDAY

TIP T.I. HARRIS HUSTLE GANG TOUR WEDNESDAY WED 3

THUR - SUN THUR 4 - SUN

FRI 5

FRI 5

SUN 7

TIP T.I. HARRIS HUSTLE GANG TOUR

SHAKORI HILLS GRASSROOTS FESTIVAL

FIDDLE & BOW SOCIETY: LIGHTNIN’ WELLS

CINCO DE MAYO AT MAC & NELLI’S

WHAT: Grammy-award winning rapper, actor and Grand Hustle Records founder Tip T.I. Harris is set to introduce his new line-up of artists signed to his label during the 29-city U.S. Hustle Gang Tour. The Hustle Gang artists set for the tour include Grand Hustles VP Trae Tha Truth, RaRA, Yung Brooke, Tokyo, Jetz and London Jae. WHEN: 8 p.m.

WHERE: Arizona Pete’s.

2900 Patterson Street, Greensboro.

MORE: $45 tickets.

WHAT: The Shakori Hills GrassRoots Festival of Music & Dance will hold its 15th annual spring festival from Thursday, May 4 to Sunday, May 7. The festival will feature more than 40 bands and performers on two big outdoor stages, a large Dance Tent, and an intimate Cabaret Tent.

WHEN: All day Thur, Fri, Sat, & Sun. WHERE: Shakori Hills.

1439 Henderson Tanyard Road, Pittsboro.

MORE: $27 - $124 tickets.

Kids 12 and under get in free.

WHAT: If acoustic country blues is your bag, nobody represents the genre better than North Carolina’s own Mike Lightnin’ Wells. Wells started playing guitar and harmonica at an early age and was drawn to traditional blues and folk music. He performed publicly for the first time in the early 70s in the Chapel Hill area and has since performed across the country and Europe.

WHEN: 8 p.m.

WHERE: Muddy Creek Music Hall.

5455 Bethania Road, Winston-Salem.

MORE: $13-$15 admission.

WHAT: No borders or walls here! First 50 customers receive a free sombrero. Music will be preformed by Stephen Henson from 5-7 followed by Southern Eyes from 9-12.

We’ll be hosting a Mexican beer tap takeover as well as serving a special Mexican menu.

Viva Mexico!

WHEN: 5 p.m.

WHERE: Mac & Nelli’s.

4926 Country Club Road, Winston-Salem.

MORE: Free entry.

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MADE 4 MARKET: SPRING ARTS, CRAFT, AND POTTERY SHOW WHAT: You are invited to MADE 4 Market Spring Arts, Crafts, & Pottery Show that features more than 90 local local artist. Check out beautifully handcrafted jewelry, pottery, fiber art, fine art, wood, artisan foods gifts and so much more!

WHEN: 11 a.m.

WHERE: Greensboro Farmers Curb Market.

501 Yanceyville Street, Greensboro.

MORE: Free entry.

L.95 IA C E P S H C N U L 1 L 1 L $ O MAKI R8.95 & 3 FOR 2 FOR $ BETNINTOGBAOTXE$S7.50 STAR

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LUNCH: MON-FRI 11:30 AM - 2:30 PM • DINNER: SAT 5-10:30 PM

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[LOCAL TALENT]

HOLDEN CESSION AND ALYZZA MAY-TRNSCND BEAUTY

BY ALLISON STALBERG

Together Holden Cession and Alyzza May have created TRNSCND Beauty, a health/beauty line that supports transgender and gender nonconforming organizing.

The creation of the business happened organically when May decided to make a salve for Cession.

“I had rosemary in my house and I thought ‘Oh, rosemary is a hair growth stimulant,’” said May. “’Let me create a salve for Holden as they are growing out their luscious beard.’ I looked up the recipe and made that salve.

“That was it. Then we ended up as the co-planners of the North Carolina Trans Pride and in that, we were like ‘Let’s make a bunch more stuff.’”

Today May and Cession make oils, lip balms, body butters, bath bombs and more out of their own homes. Using recipes from the Internet, they have experimented and created products of their own based on scents and effects.

“There has definitely been witchy learning,” said May. May and Cession have appreciated how much their community have boosted

TRNSCND Beauty’s products.

“One of our friends the other day shouted out about the rosemary salve that we have,” said Cession. “He was talking about how good it was for his beard. He was like, ‘Yeah, I’m a beard ambassador.’”

TRNSCND Beauty currently sells their products through Instagram, events and the Glenwood Farmer’s Market.

“Part of the intention behind this is a portion of all the proceeds will go to benefit transgender and nonconforming organizing within the state,” said May. “Simultaneously, I’d say half of our client base is trans and gender nonconforming people. There are a lot of people in the process of transitioning.”

May and Cession are thinking of going on a vending circuit for the summer. They hope to expand both the products they sell and eventually involve more people in the project.

Want to learn more? You can go to TRNSCND Beauty’s Instagram account at www.instagram.com/trnscnd_beauty/ or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ trnscnd. !

!

WANT TO BE FEATURED AS A LOCAL TALENT? E-mail a photo and a short bio to editor@yesweekly.com

GEARS & GUITARS MUSIC FESTIVAL May 26–29 COLLECTIVE SOUL

COREY SMITH

TONIC THE BLUE STONES

May 26, gates open at 6 p.m.

May 27, gates open at 5 p.m.

Photo: Joseph Guay

MUSCADINE BLOODLINE ERIC DODD

FREE MEMORIAL DAY CONCERTS Food Trucks, Family Activities, and Walk & Roll

BARENAKED LADIES

MIPSO

EDWIN MCCAIN SUSTO

THE PLAIDS Photo: Sasha Israel

May 28, gates open at 6 p.m.

CLAY HOWARD AND THE SILVER ALERTS HANK, PATTIE & THE CURRENT

May 29, 1 – 7 p.m.

All Performances are at Bailey Park · Rain or Shine · Food and Beverages Available for Purchase

GearsandGuitars(9.9x5print)YesWeekly.indd WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

Tickets at gearsandguitarsfest.com or Ticketmaster 1

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12:08 PM MAY 3-9, 2017 4/11/17 YES! WEEKLY

triad foodies

EAT IT!

A reason to just Breathe

BY KRISTI MAIER | @triadfoodies

O

ne would think that a speakeasy just couldn’t fly in that little in-between town of Kernersville. Affectionately known as K-Vegas, with the exception of traffic, it’s anything but Vegas. It has charm, with coffee shops, convenient stores, and a burgeoning and welcoming downtown. But no bars and certainly no speakeasy, which is what Breathe Cocktail Lounge claims to be. A five-dollar investment gets you a year-long membership and access to an inviting bar/lounge that begs you to inquire and just chill, or you know….breathe.

Our monthly Chef’s Table found us here.

We wanted to do something a little bit different in April. And we wanted more folks to get to know owner Christine Federico and her business. So a sold-out dinner guest list arrived with high hopes and hungry bellies and we settled in.

Breathe Cocktail Lounge opened last November after a decade of dreaming

8 YES! WEEKLY

and planning by Christine and Federico.

They already owned the successful boutique, Eclection, serving a tiny menu of small plates, wine and coffee. Local artists and makers sell their new and repurposed goods and it’s all eye candy and wonderful implements for your home

or self. Over the years, the couple have gathered vintage items and even turned others’ trash into treasure to create the upstairs storage area into something so much more. “We just had this space and it was like a big closet,” Christine Federico told us. “Every time I passed something on the road, I’d grab it and just put it in storage. Other people brought their stuff here too. And we tossed around a bunch of ideas about how to put the space to use.

We decided that what Kernersville really needed is a really good bar.”

The concept was decided and shortly thereafter they hired super popular mixologist John Vavryshko IV as a bar manager and it elevated the bar program at Breathe to a new level for the neighborhood and rivals any craft cocktail bar in the area.

Now, the space is a vintage meets industrial space with lots of cool lighting and comfy seating. It really is beautiful inside.

Christine has been cooking her whole life and created a menu that began in the cafe area of Eclection and evolved into a tasty and intriguing selection of modestly priced small plates upstairs at Breathe. We enjoyed five courses, with an Asian flare.

First Course Fresh Spring Roll This was a fresh spring roll filled with fresh shrimp that you’d find in an Asian restaurant. It was light and had that satisfying combination of sweet shrimp with crunchy veggie, herbs and rice paper noodles with a side of peanut sauce and a plum sauce. It was a delicate introduction of what was to come.

MAY 3-9, 2017

Second Course Tuna Tartare with Asian Slaw This tuna tartare was bright pink and so fresh with a wonderful flavor of sesame oil throughout. The little rice cracker that was laid in-between the tuna and the bed of seaweed paper offered an unexpected crunch.

Third Course Thai Chicken Meatballs These little chicken meatballs have been on the Eclection menu downstairs and a Federico household favorite.

They’ve since become a neighborhood favorite. The meatballs were an obvious choice to transition to Breathe’s menu as well as our Chef’s Table menu. They’re meaty, of course, with a sweet and tangy sauce with a slight kick. These meatballs are always on Breathe’s menu.

WWW.YESWEEKLY.COMW

Matthew Troy, Music Director

presents

Fourth Course Citrus Chili Pork Belly Christine nailed this pork belly. She told me it had cooked all day. But what made the pork belly even more satisfying was the incredible crunch on the skin. A little bit of that pork skin with the tender meat wrapped up in a mouthful of ramen made the perfect bite.

Fifth Course Mochi Dessert Cocktail Mixologist Vavryshko created our dessert that featured a number of spirits for a Mochi flavored cocktail with rum, saki red bean paste and a little bit of orange blossom water. Vavryshko then floated a bit of heavy cream on top. He served it with a side of the traditional dessert mochi, which is a rice cake made of mochigome, a short-grain japonica glutinous rice. The lounge didn’t make the mochi, rather we were encouraged to try a taste of the cocktail, followed with a bite of mochi as a comparison. The mochi was sweet with an interesting texture. The cocktail was far superior and the thickened cream was a fun touch.

The traditional menu at Breathe Cocktail Lounge varies. There’s a pimento cheese appetizer, charcuterie, those delightful meatballs, and if you have trouble deciding, you can pick three for a special price. Breathe also has wine dinners with special themes and is always coming up with new ways to share what they’re cooking up. The cocktail menu is ever evolving too, as Vavryshko loves to create new flavors. However, can we please suggest the Bread & Butter? Yes, like the pickles. Vavryshko makes a shrub that brings all the flavors of that sweet and WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

& The Red Violin

Matthew Troy, conductor

Thursday, June 1, 2017 at 7:30 PM Stevens Center of the UNC School of the Arts

savory pickle to a party in a coupe glass.

We highly recommend.

An annual VIP membership to Breathe is $5. The lounge is open WednesdayThursday 5pm-12am, Friday-Saturday 5pm-2am. Eclection is open downstairs Monday-Thursday 10am-8pm and FridaySaturday until 10pm. Eclection does have a small selection of bites to eat in its cafe, including cheese, olives, wine and coffee.

Visit eclectionnc.com for more information. You can learn more about Christine Federico, John Vavryshko IV and Breathe Cocktail Lounge on my podcast, “At The Table With Triadfoodies” on the Triad Podcast Network, downloadable on your computer or mobile device.

Our next Chef’s Table is Tuesday, May 23 at Sedgefield Country Club, where Chef James Patterson will surprise us with multiple courses. For tickets visit Triadfoodies on Facebook. !

SEE THIS EPIC FILM ACCOMPANIED

BY A LIVE SYMPHONY!

Featuring Bryan Emmon Hall, violin

Purchase your tickets at

www.piedmontwindsymphony.com/tickets

MAY 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

9

visions

SEE IT!

Undiscovered Landscapes

I

BY STEVE MITCHELL

grew up with Joan Didion, you could say. I am saying. I don’t know her, I never met her, but she came along at a time in my life when she was completely necessary and her writing changed me, has continued to change me, in the way we can be changed by someone’s work which is at the same time completely alien and totally familiar.

In the late ‘70’s when I stumbled upon Slouching Toward Bethlehem, women writers were still an anomaly, or seemed that way to me. They were there, of course, producing amazing work, but they weren’t talked about in the same manner as the Macho Male Heroes of Literature: Hemingway, Mishima, and Mailer. Discovering women writers, at that time (not so long ago), was like stumbling upon another country, a completely new culture.

Didion led me to Janet Malcolm and Renata Adler. They were the Holy Triumvirate of Non-Fiction for me. They were cool, observant, demanding. Their writing was

luminous and precise. And they were so goddam smart.

For a kid growing up in Winston Salem, they were intoxicating not only in their language but in the liminal worlds they pried open, worlds with a rich nuance and texture. In their hands, the most mundane exchange could be a revelation.

Now and then, they could puncture the facade of the adult world in ways I’d never read before, with a kind of courageous and measured despair.

I still remember the chill that bloomed between my shoulder blades and passed through my body on the last page of Play It as It Lays; I’d never had a physical reaction to a book before.

“In New Orleans in June the air is heavy with sex and death, not violent death but death by decay, overripeness, rotting, death by drowning, suffocation,

Scuppernong Books WFDD/Scuppernong Quarterly Bookclub by

Saturday, May 13, 2pm 304 South Elm Street Greensboro NC 27401 | 336.763.1919 scuppernongbooks.com | scuppernongbooks@gmail.com

10 YES! WEEKLY

MAY 3-9, 2017

fever of unknown etiology…the atmosphere absorbs its own light, never reflects light but sucks it in until random objects glow with a morbid luminescence.”

South and West: From a Notebook (Alfred A. Knopf, 126 pgs., $21.00) is not the best Didion. It’s compiled from notebooks she kept during her travels through the South and West in 1970. Not unusually for Didion, this trip doesn’t appear to have a purpose, it’s more of a gradual ramble.

Didion grew up in California and she approaches the South as a foreign country, full of idiom and ritual she knows she can never understand. It’s 1970 and the things she sees and describes could appear as caricatures to someone who didn’t grow up in the South at that time. Children playing in the dust making necklaces from pop-top tabs, women wearing polyester dresses with high coiffed hair, restaurants with no name (Why would you need a name?

Everyone knows what it is!) only a sign announcing Air Conditioning, a man standing on a street corner with a shotgun.

I remember that South: or rather, I’d forgotten it until Didion reminded me. Rusting cars at the edges of the trees in the backs of everyone’s yard, dusty dirt roads ending at a ramshackle store, endless billboards graphically hawking Salvation. The sense that the earth would reclaim everything in endless tangles of sumac, kudzu, and wet rot unless it was constantly hacked, mown, or burned.

And, among the people, a lethargic sense of rootedness approaching immobility and a kind of fierce insularity that insured I perfectly understood Shirley Jackson’s The Lottery the first time I read it at age fourteen.

“You-all ought to come visit with us,” a third woman said.

They were all young women, the oldest among them perhaps thirty.

“We’ll never get up there,” the first woman said.

“I never been anyplace I wanted to go.”

No one ever arrives anywhere in a Didion story; they always simply find themselves at a place and, more often than not, find themselves wishing they were somewhere else.

South and West is an aggressively casual book after Didion’s last two, The Year of Magical Thinking and Blue Nights, detailing as they did the death of her husband and her daughter, respectively. You won’t find the breathtaking acuteness of observation or the near surgical dissection of her emotional states here, but you will have the opportunity to travel beside her and consider the world from her cool, bemused perspective. Perhaps, you’ll remember something about the South you’ve forgotten and that something might be comforting or terrifying.

“It occurred to me almost constantly in the South that had I lived there I would have become an eccentric and full of anger, and I wondered what form the anger would have taken.

Would I have taken up causes, or would I have simply knifed somebody?”

There is nothing to say that growing up in the South is decidedly better or worse than anywhere else. We all struggle through our teenage years and early twenties at the brink of many, concurrent disasters. We feel fragile, exposed, unformed, but we would never admit such a thing. We find our ways to survive. Or, should I say, I found my way.

I did not, in the end, knife someone. Joan Didion is one of the reasons why.

One day she will die. I’ll find myself looking forward to the book she’ll write about her death. She has, it seems, shared every other instant of her life with me. Some dark absence will open in the pit of my stomach when I realize she’ll never write that book. That ache will stay with me for a long time. !

STEVE MITCHELL is co-owner of Scuppernong Books.

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Student selections screened at UNCSA

Mark Burger

Contributing columnist

The UNCSA School of Filmmaking’s spring semester is drawing to a close, and that means a fresh selection of student films has been completed.

Now, you’re invited to see the filmmakers of tomorrow at work today – as third-year student films will be screened Thursday and fourth-year

student films Friday.

The fourth-year student film line-up includes Blitz (directed by Chad Knuth), a sports-related drama about a high-school student pondering an athletic scholarship; Cypress Tree (directed by Emery McGaha), an intense drama about suspicions that arise between a mother and her rebellious son; The Eyes of a Dragon (directed by Michael Kauffmann), in which a middle-aged woman escapes a broken marriage with a mysterious cabbie; The Harem of Henry Javier (directed by Jared Sprouse), in which an imaginative teenager is torn between a harem of women in his fantasies and an edgy new female student in school; Low Miles (directed by Joe Hoenig), a character study about a grief-stricken mother recalling bittersweet

EYES OF A DRAGON

101 West Fifth Street WSNC 27101 336.723.3700 Tickets Sold on ETIX & Local 27101

memories of her daughter; Pica (directed

by Alex Thomas), a period piece set in the 1950s wherein a pregnant housewife hosts a baby shower while dealing with a compulsive disorder; Polo Rainbow (directed by Zach Doerfer), a college comedy about three buddies looking for fun; Straggler (directed by Sean Rooney), in which a veteran “ghostbuster” matches wits with a spirit who doesn’t realize he’s dead; Supernova (directed by Gavin Lankford and Alek Kosinski), a sci-fi adventure about a young boy’s determination to retrieve his favorite video, replete with 3-D model effects; Tethered (directed by Beth Fletcher), a whimsical adventure in which a young inventor creates a device that can change the weather; and Shades (directed by Dri Damasceno), a drama

about a random encounter between a beautiful drifter and a cynical gas-station attendant.

Many of these films were shot in Winston-Salem and the surrounding Piedmont Triad region, so don’t be surprised if you glimpse familiar local landmarks in them – and perhaps some familiar faces, too! !

WANNA

go?

The UNCSA School of Filmmaking will screen its third-year student films 7 pm Thursday and its fourth-year student films 4 pm and 8 pm Friday in the ACE Exhibition Complex, located on the UNCSA campus, 1533 S. Main St., Winston-Salem.

Admission is free. For more information about this and other UNCSA events, call 336.721.1945 or visit the official website: http://uncsa.edu/.

6/11 Doors at 7:00 PM Show at 8:00 PM Advance $22 Door $27

A/perture Cinemas takes a stand with May screenings Winston-Salem’s premiere art-house destination, a/perture cinemas, is participating in The Seventh Arts Stand, a nationwide series of films being presented by cinemas and community centers around the nation as an act of cinematic solidarity against Islamophobia. The Network of Arab Alternative Screens (NAAS) has teamed up with US cinemas to present stories of friends and filmmakers abroad, to expand the circle of knowledge and learning with cinemagoers.

The first screening, scheduled for May 9, is Rokhsareh Ghaem Maghami’s awardwinning documentary feature Sonita (in English, Persian and Dari with English subtitles), which explores the life of Sonita Alizadeh, a refugee from Afghanistan who defies the odds – and traditions – in her quest to become a hop-hop star.

A panel discussion will follow the screening moderated by Joshua Canzona, a PhD candidate in religious studies from Georgetown University and an adjunct instructor at the Wake Forest University WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

School of Divinity, featuring Darlene May, teaching professor in Arabic at Wake Forest University; Dr. Hamdy Radwan and Aladin Ebraheem from the Annoor Islamic Center in Clemmons; and Dr. Truman Dunn, retired Moravian minister and board member of Interfaith WinstonSalem.

The second screening, scheduled for May 10, is Zach Ingrasci and Chris Temple’s documentary feature Salam Neighbor (in English and Arabic with English subtitles), in which the two filmmakers journeyed overseas to live among the 80,000 refugees in the Za’atari refugee camp in Jordan, near the Syrian border, in an effort to convey to audiences the ongoing severity of this humanitarian crisis by profiling individuals who have been uprooted from their homes and are struggling to rebuild their lives.

Joshua Canzona will again moderate a post-screening panel discussion that again features Dr. Hamdy Radwan, as well as A.Z. Obiedat, associate profes-

sor of Arabic at Wake Forest University; Jerry McLeese, the founder and board member of Interfaith Winston-Salem and co-founder of Compassionate WinstonSalem; and Kel Billings, a community volunteer who has five years’ experience assisting refugees, most recently in Jordan and Lesvos.

Both screenings will be preceded by the 2012 Oscar-nominated short film Karama Has No Walls (in Arabic with English subtitles), which examines the 2011 political uprising in Yemen. !

WANNA

6/30-7/2 Show at 5:00 PM Tickets $40-$90

go?

The Seventh Art Stand’s presentation of Sonita will be screened 6 pm May 9, and Salam Neighbor 6 pm May 10 at a/perture cinemas, 311 W. Fourth St., Winston-Salem. Tickets are $12.50 (each screening). For advance tickets or more information, call 336.722.8148 or visit the official website: aperturecinema.com. The official Seventh Art Stand website is https://www.seventhartstand. com/.

6/30 Show at 8:00 PM MAY 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

11

tunes

HEAR IT!

Yarn’s roots country connects New York and North Carolina

BY JOHN ADAMIAN| @johnradamian

P

lace looms large in American music. Being from California or New York can set expectations about how a band or artist might sound. But the South in general, and areas like Texas or New Orleans or the Mississippi Delta have their own outsize meaning and musical sway.

Yarn is an Americana/roots/country act originally from New York City, but half of the band has relocated to North Carolina as of a few years back. And the quartet spends so much time on the road that the whole idea of home gets kind of wobbly.

That rambling and rootless uncertainty becomes part of the story. This year marks the group’s tenth as a band, so they’re getting the quality of seasoned road warriors. On the band’s most recent record, This Is The Year, from 2016, singer/songwriter/frontman Blake Christiana writes about always staying in motion and about a longing to connect with a style and feeling associated with specific parts of the American South.

I spoke to Christiana last week as the band was driving somewhere in the Great Lakes Region, having recently made the long haul from Montana to Chicago. Yarn play the Blind Tiger in Greensboro on Friday, May 5.

The Americana/alt-country boom has been underway for around 20 years or so, depending on how you calculate its spark. But the road to country music is a pretty natural one for any classic rock fan.

Christiana grew up in upstate New York, and he had an ear for Neil Young and the Grateful Dead, where pedal steel, tight vocal harmonies and mandolin are all right at home.

“When I started working on the first Yarn record it was just kind of an experiment, doing an acoustic record,” says Christiana. “I didn’t purposely write songs to sound country. I was veering toward that and wanted it to be like American Beauty.”

Fast forward 10 years and Christiana is right at home in the zone, and right at home in North Carolina, having been living in Raleigh for a few years. The Tar Heel connection might be best articulated on “Carolina Heart,” the first song on the recent record. “Oh, Carolina, won’t you rescue my heart,” sings Christiana. “I’m begging for a new start.”

Rebirth and fresh chances are a theme on the new record. “This is the year we’re all gonna come out winners, we’re gonna raise a glass to a new beginning,” Christiana sings on the title track.

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There’s optimism there, but there’s also the suggestion that one doesn’t ask for a do-over unless something went a bit wrong on the last go-round. And if the future is something with lots of possibility, sometimes the recent past has some sorry screw-ups that just need to be put behind us with the a help of a festive evening and a general willingness to have a good time.

“That theme bleeds in and out of a lot of what I write,” says Christiana. “Life is a series of hurdles, and sometimes you’ve got to knock one down and learn from it.”

A little high-octane R&R in the moment is often the only thing that will allow you to focus in the future. “When you just can’t win,” Christiana sings on “Easy Road,” “... Take the easy road, let the world go round/Fire it up and burn it down. … Tomorrow’s another day, but tonight, I’m checking out.”

A lot of band names are just a name, but one gets the sense that Yarn is a name that reflects something about the group’s sensibilities. It’s homespun, it’s maybe a little scratchy, it can keep you warm, it’s another name for a story, it gets knitted together to make something that can be both humble and complex. It can get tangled.

A couple of the songs on This Is The Year are as much about tipping the Stetson to country artists and sensibilities of the past. “Sweet Dolly” is a sort of love letter to the pin-up charms of Dolly Parton, who, in her “rhinestone suit,” was “every man’s cowgirl dream.” And a song like “Long Way To Texas” pays homage to the Lone Star

State’s gigantic musical footprint, referencing Waylon referencing Bob Wills and alluding to Willie Nelson while sounding like a good-time ramble that does Doug Sahm proud.

“Those guys were doing what they wanted to do,” says Christiana. “They were the outlaws. They were cool as shit.”

Along the way Christiana gets to pay a compliment to the culinary delights of western Louisiana, with a funny line about boudin sausage.

The demands of the stage make it so that Yarn can operate in a couple of different modes -- as a rowdy rock band with honky-tonk sensibilities, and as slow and sad country-tinged troubadours. Yarn will play at the Roosterwalk Festival in Martinsville, Virginia at the end of the month.

Christiana says the band will perform one set of original material and one of Rolling Stones covers. “It’ll be Yarn Gets Stoned,” he says.

Some bands might be wary of turning the constant motion of road life into subject matter for songs, but Christiana sees the reality of the touring musician as rich creative fodder.

“It’s a constant flow. Every experience creates a new opportunity to write a song,” he says. “It’s to be embraced.” !

WANNA

go?

Yarn plays the Blind Tiger, 1819 Spring Garden St., Greensboro, 9 p.m., $10 - $14, with the Will Overman Band, theblindtiger.com

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Submissions should be sent to artdirector@yesweekly.com by Friday at 5 p.m., prior to the week’s publication.

Visit yesweekly.com and click on calendar to list your event online. home grown muSic Scene | compiled by Austin Kindley

ASHEBORO

FOUR SAINTS BREWING

218 South Fayetteville St. | 336.610.3722 foursaintsbrewing.com May 5: Wolfie Calhoun May 12: Josh Marlowe May 13: Delta Son May 17: Irish/Celtic Music Session May 19: Shiloh Hill May 20: Reed Turchi Jun 2: Wolfie Calhoun Jun 3: Ziggy Pockets Jun 7: Irish/Celtic Music Session

May 13: Exit 180 May 20: Southern Eyes Jun 3: Shmack Daniels Jun 10: Lasater Union Jun 17: DJ Baldee

dAnBuRy

GREEN HERON ALE HOUSE 1110 Flinchum Rd | 336.593.4733 greenheronclub.com May 6: The Danbury Songwriters

gREEnSBORO

ARIZONA PETE’S

clEmmOnS

RIvER RIDGE TAPHOUSE 1480 River Ridge Dr | 336.712.1883 riverridgetaphouse.com May 4: Mike Lewis May 5: Nine Lives May 10: Karaoke w/ DJ Tyler May 12: Pop Guns!

May 19: Exit 180 May 24: Karaoke w/ DJ Tyler May 26: Landon Wall May 30: Karaoke w/ DJ Tyler Jun 2: Honkey Tonk Outlaw Jun 16: Morgan Keene Band Jun 23: Big Daddy Mojo Jun 30: Brothers Pearl

vILLAGE SQUARE TAP HOUSE

6000 Meadowbrook Mall Ct | 336.448.5330 May 6: Big Daddy Mojo

2900 Patterson St #A | 336.632.9889 arizonapetes.com May 3: T.I. - The Hustle Gang Tour with Young Dro, Translee, Rara, Shauntrell Pender, & more.

May 5: 1-2-3 Friday May 12: 1-2-3 Friday May 14: Animals As Leaders May 20: Suffocation Jun 4: P-Lo Jun 15: Reel Big Fish

ARTISTIKA NIGHT CLUB

523 S Elm St | 336.271.2686 artistikanightclub.com May 5: DJ Dan the Player May 6: DJ Paco and DJ Dan the Player

BIG PURPLE

812 Olive St. | 336.302.3728 May 6: Hannah Thomas May 13: Colleen Raney Trio

May 25: Dave Cecil Band Jun 23: Lacy Green

THE BLIND TIGER

1819 Spring Garden St | 336.272.9888 theblindtiger.com May 3: Reading Day Party with the Wright Avenue May 4: G Herbo aka Lil Herbo May 5: Yarn with Will Overman Band May 6: Greerfest II May 9: Reggae with The Elovaters May 12: Brandy Clark & Charlie Worsham May 13: Robert Randolph & The Family Band May 17: Fat Catz & Disco Risque May 20: Create ft. Buku w/ Devious, Scales B2B Malfunctron, violinix, Firekeys May 23: Alteras & varsity May 24: Electric Soul Pandemic & Duk Tan May 25: PNB Rock May 26: The Billy Folks CD Release Show May 27: Get Rude Reunion show with ASRG & Resist Jun 1: Of Tyrants & Footage Of A Yeti, Guatama, Sidelines, Hollow Eyes Jun 2: Hail The Sun, Caspize, Eidola, Limbs, Hopesick Jun 3: Maxo Kream Jun 4: Jahman Brahman & Elusive Groove Jun 6: Beach Casino & North11 Jun 9: A Boogie wit da Hoodie Jun 10: Create. Ft. Megalodon, Midnight T w/ Crowell, & more

Jun 15: Perpetual Groove with Brocolli Samurai Jun 16: Miss May I - Upon A Burning Body, Kublai Khan, Currents, Peacekeepers Jun 19: Fit For An Autopsy, Tombs, Moon Tooth, Daedalvs

BUCKHEAD SALOON

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CHURCHILL’S ON ELM

213 S Elm St | 336.275.6367 churchillscigarlounge.com May 13: Sahara Reggae Band May 20: Jack Long Old School Jam Jun 2: DJ Precise Jun 10: Sahara Reggae Band Jun 17: Jack Long Old School Jam

THE CORNER BAR

1700 Spring Garden St | 336.272.5559 corner-bar.com May 4: Live Thursdays May 11: Live Thursdays

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coMMon groundS 11602 S Elm Ave | 336.698.3888 May 26: Andrew Kasab

conE dEnIM

117 S Elm St | 336.378.9646 cdecgreensboro.com May 6: Trial By Fire: Tribute To Journey May 12: chase rice May 19: nF Jun 2: Biz Markie Jun 16: John Mulaney Jun 18: J cole Jun 22: Thunder from down under Jun 24: Blackbear Jul 13: Tom Segura Jul 14: Kehlani

ThE grEEn BEAn

341 S. Elm St | 336.691.9990 thegreenbeancoffeehouse.blogspot.com

grEEnE STrEET cluB 113 N Greene St | 336.273.4111 May 5: cinco de Mayo May 6: Phrozen Ivy May 12: The last Stand

hAM’S gATE cITY

3017 Gate City Blvd | 336.851.4800 hamsrestaurants.com

hAM’S nEw gArdEn

1635 New Garden Rd | 336.288.4544 hamsrestaurants.com

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SoMEwhErE ElSE TAvErn

5713 W Friendly Ave | 336.292.5464 facebook.com/thesomewhereelsetavern May 12: 8 vacant graves, Bleedseason May 19: The culturalist May 20: Mirada, headfirst For halos, reason|define, Fall river Massacre May 27: Sixth Sense, Education in reverse, Antenora, discoveries, days To Break, deep hollow Jun 3: The norm Jun 10: Mirada, Breathing Serenity, visions of Beauty Jun 17: The culturalist, Key of Betrayal, lunacy rain

BluE BourBon JAcK’S

1310 N Main St | 336.882.2583 reverbnation.com/venue/bluebourbonjacks Jun 9: Southern Eyes Jun 23: Southbound 49 Sep 23: Southern Eyes oct 6: Jukebox revolver

clAddAgh rESTAurAnT & PuB

130 E Parris Ave | 336.841.0521 thecladdaghrestaurantandpub.com

hAM’S PAllAdIuM 5840 Samet Dr | 336.887.2434 hamsrestaurants.com

lIBErTY BrEwErY

914 Mall Loop Rd | 336.882.4677 hghosp.com

jamestown

ThE dEcK

118 E Main St | 336.207.1999 thedeckatrivertwist.com May 5: Big daddy Mojo May 6: Brothers Pearl

SPEAKEASY TAvErn

1706 Battleground Ave | 336.378.0006 May 5: rube May 12: Julian Sizemore May 19: Southern Fiction May 26: Pay rock & david Mclaughin

ThE IdIoT Box coMEdY cluB

2134 Lawndale Dr | 336.274.2699 www.idiotboxers.com Jun 23: Sean Patton

world oF BEEr

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A N INTIM ATE E V ENING OF SONGS & STOR IES WITH

high point

AFTEr hourS TAvErn

1614 N Main St | 336.883.4113 afterhourstavern.net May 27: louder, Kwik Fixx, dog daze Jun 10: Mightier Than Me

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May 12: Jill Goodson Band May 13: Soul Central May 19: Norlina May 26: Jukebox Revolver May 27: Jaxon Jill

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FooThillS BREWiNG

638 W 4th St | 336.777.3348 foothillsbrewing.com May 3: Bluegrass Sweethearts May 6: Sol Flo May 7: Sunday Jazz May 10: The Eversole Brothers May 13: lizzy Ross May 14: Sunday Jazz May 17: Greg Wilson and the Second Wind May 20: The pop Guns May 21: Sunday Jazz May 24: The Ruckus May 28: Sunday Jazz Jun 4: Sunday Jazz

ThE GaRaGE

110 W 7th St | 336.777.1127 the-garage.ws May 5: Bless These Sounds under The City, Melt May 6: The Tills May 17: dark prophet Tongueless Monk, Crown larks, Knives of Spain May 18: Stellar Circuits, lemon Sky May 20: Cuzco, Jet Black alley Cat May 25: Sofia Talvik May 26: 1970’s Film Stock “Birds” album release party w/ The Bronzed Chorus, Transport 77 May 27: Taylor Bays and The laser Rays, drat The luck, pinche Gringo

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206 Harvey St | 336.760.0362 thehickorytavern.com May 4: Mike Bustin acoustic May 11: Mike Bustin acoustic

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JohNNY & JuNE’S SalooN

207 N Green St | 336.631.3143 2ngtavern.com 408 West 4th St | 336.331.3431 facebook.com/bulls-tavern May 4: J Timber & Joel henry May 3-9, 2017

May 9: Jim moody & Friends May 16: Jim Moody & Friends

2105 Peters Creek Pkwy | 336.724.0546 johnnynjunes.com

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May 5: Red Dirt Revival May 6: Eyecon May 17: Wayland Jun 24: The Lacs, Crucifix, and Southern Eyes Jun 27: Otherwise, Righteous Vendetta, Through Fire, A Light Divided

LAughing gAS COMEDY CLub

2105 Peters Creek Pkwy laughingas.net May 4: Donnell Rawlings May 5: Donnell Rawlings May 6: Donnell Rawlings May 12: Jason benci May 13: Jason benci May 19: becky Robinson May 20: becky Robinson Jun 10: Smokey Suarez

MAC & nELLi’S

4926 Country Club Rd | 336.529.6230 macandnellisws.com May 3: Karaoke w/ DJ Chris Mar 4: Darrell hoots May 5: Fiesta Musica - Cinco De Mayo - Stephen henson, Southern Eyes May 8: Mike bustin May 10: Karaoke w/ DJ Chris May 11: Chad & Dom May 12: Stephen henson, Later Jon & David May 13: Double Down May 14: Johnny The One Man band

MiLLEnniuM CEnTER

101 West 5th Street | 336.723.3700 MCenterevents.com Jun 11: Shovels and Rope Jun 30: heavy Rebel Weekender

MiLnER’S

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MuDDY CREEK CAFE

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Collins May 26: Sam Foster May 27: usual Suspects May 28: Rob Price Jun 1: Open Mic w/ Country Dan Collins Jun 2: Russell Lapinski Jun 3: Ryan newcomb Jun 4: Phillip Craft Jun 9: Chief’s Choice Jun 10: not Ready band Jun 24: usual Suspects

MuDDY CREEK MuSiC hALL

5455 Bethania Rd | 336.923.8623 May 6: Time Sawyer May 7: Tellico w/ Lori Jo bridges May 13: urban Soil May 14: Dan River girls - CD Release May 18: Front Country May 19: Christy Snow May 20: Kevin Maines and The Volts May 21: Curley, hyde, & O’Meachair May 26: Chelsea Sorrell with Taylor Vaden May 27: Suzy McCalley, Abigail Dowd, Clay howard May 28: Across the blue Ridge w/ Paul brown ft. The Onlies Jun 3: Aaron burdett CD Release Show Jun 4: billy Strings with Presley baker Jun 7: braiden Sunshine from The Voice Jun 9: RKiii Jun 15: Justin Cody Fox Jun 17: banna Jun 18: Mean Mary Jun 21: Jon Stickley Trio Jun 23: Riverbend Reunion Jun 24: Amanda Cook and Kennesaw Ridge Jun 27: Marbin Jun 30: Christiane & The Strays

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QuALiTY inn

2008 S. Hawthorne Rd | 336-765-6670

ThE QuiET PinT

1420 W 1st St | 336.893.6881 thequietpint.com

TEE TiME SPORTS & SPiRiTS

3040 Healy Dr | 336.760.4010 May 13: big Daddy Mojo Jun 3: honky Tonk Outlaws Jul 15: Jaxon Jill Aug 19: Fuhnetik union

May 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

17

[CONCERTS] Compiled by Alex Eldridge May 4: 21 Savage May 7: Tech N9ne May 14: Sylvan Esso w/ Lucy Dacus May 18: Rüfüs Du Sol May 20: Zoso - Tribute to Led Zeppelin May 21: Sabaton May 23: Franz Ferdinand May 27: Real Friends Jun 2: Delta Rae Jun 2: City and Colour Jun 3: Biz Markie Jun 9: Banks Jun 10: Kaleo

CARY

BOOTH AMPHITHEATRE 8003 Regency Pkwy | 919.462.2025 www.boothamphitheatre.com Jun 7: Paul Simon

CHARLOTTE

BOJANGLES COLISEUM

2700 E Independence Blvd | 704.372.3600 www.bojanglescoliseum.com May 3: Outcry May 14: Charlie Wilson & Johnny Gill

PNC MUSIC PAVILION

707 Pavilion Blvd | 704.549.1292 www.livenation.com May 13: Chris Stapleton May 14: Future Jun 3: Train Jun 8: Chance the Rapper Jun 9: Iron Maiden Jun 15: Muse w/ Thirty Seconds to Mars

CMCU AMPHITHEATRE former Uptown Amphitheatre 820 Hamilton St | 704.549.5555 www.livenation.com May 5: Travis Scott May 6: Bastille May 12: Weezer Jun 6: Paul Simon Jun 13: Dirty Heads & Soja

TWC ARENA

THE FILLMORE

1000 NC Music Factory Blvd | 704.916.8970 www.fillmorecharlottenc.com May 3: Dawes

DURHAM

CAROLINA THEATRE

309 W Morgan St | 919.560.3030 www.carolinatheatre.org May 5: Loretta Lynn May 23: George Thorogood and The Destroyers

DPAC

123 Vivian St | 919.680.2787 www.dpacnc.com May 11: Pixies May 17: The Tenors

GREENSBORO

CAROLINA THEATRE 310 S Greene St | 336.333.2605 www.carolinatheatre.com May 5: Titus Gant Quartet May 25: NC Brass Band Jun 6: Joe Jackson Jun 8: Rhiannon Giddens

GREENSBORO COLISEUM

333 E Trade St | 704.688.9000 www.timewarnercablearena.com May 17: The Weeknd

1921 W Gate City Blvd | 336.373.7400 www.greensborocoliseum.com May 20: Eric Church

Jun 7: Chance the Rapper Jun 12: Journey

RALEIGH

CCU MUSIC PARK AT WALNUT CREEK

3801 Rock Quarry Rd | 919.831.6400 www.livenation.com May 12: Chris Stapleton May 13: Future May 17: Kings of Leon May 20: Brad Paisley Jun 4: Train

RED HAT AMPHITHEATER 500 S McDowell St | 919.996.8800 www.redhatamphitheater.com May 6: Ben Folds May 12: Bastille May 14: The XX Jun 6: Glass Animals Jun 14: Dirty Heads & Soja

PNC ARENA

1400 Edwards Mill Rd | 919.861.2300 www.thepncarena.com May 24: The Chainsmokers

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18 YES! WEEKLY

MAY 3-9, 2017

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spotlight

Extractions: Sallie White’s solo exhibition comes to CVA Gallery

“

“When you look closely at my work, you’ll see the ghosts of a lot of different kinds of materials, even if they’re not fully realized,” she said.

Extractions takes its name from this process of adding and subtracting different mediums to canvas until White reveals the core of the emotion or event she wants to capture.

“Sometimes a painting that feels really honest to me might be beautiful, or it might be chaotic,” said White. “They look very different, but I know I’m there when I feel like I’ve gotten to the truth of each painting. That’s what I’m trying to extract; something that feels like the truth.”

White’s work will be on display at the CVA Gallery on 200 N. Davie St. May 5-19.

More of White’s work can be viewed by appointment at her studio in the Sternberger Artists Center at 712 Summit Ave. For more information about her current projects, visit www.salliewhite.com.

BY MIA OSBORN

I begin most paintings with a sense of unknowing, so my process is something like a wrestling match,” said Sallie White. “I don’t have a formula and I never take the easy way out. I want to know that the end result is something that was worth the fight.”

White, whose solo exhibit of abstract paintings will open at Greensboro’s CVA Gallery on May 5, has wrestled to bring form to her emotions for most of her life.

“When I approach a painting, I don’t really have a vision in my head of what I want to paint. It’s based on a particular energy I feel or a mood I’m in, a conversation I just had, or something I’m trying to process,” she said.

Making art has been a constant for White since childhood, even when a fixed address was not.

“I grew up kind of all over the world,” explained White, whose father served in the military. “When he retired – I guess I was in 8th grade – we moved to Savannah. But I’ve been in Greensboro now for 25 years.”

White studied art at the University of Georgia. After graduation, painting for its own sake took a back seat as she learned to apply her talents to a career. Or rather, several careers, including teaching art at the South Carolina School for the Deaf and Blind and designing art programs for nonprofit groups.

“It doesn’t matter what I’m doing; I will find a way to build art into it,” she said.

In 2007, White founded WhiteHouse & Co., an interior design and consulting business where she brings her artistic vision to styling interiors for clients as well as home staging for real estate. But the need to make art for its own sake never left her.

After decades of working in art related fields, White has been able to turn most of her energy to painting once again.

“Painting is my first love,” said White.

“It’s so nice to be concentrating on it, to have the luxury of time to do that. I keep one foot in the design world; when I’m not on a project, I’m in my studio, painting. It’s a good mix.”

White’s studio is located in the Sternberg Artists Center in Greensboro, but she is represented by Mason Fine Art in Atlanta.

Her work can be found in galleries there as well as around North Carolina. Extractions will be White’s first solo show at the CVA Gallery. She earned the opportunity from last year’s Juried Exhibition at the CVA. The WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

MIA OSBORN is a Greensboro-based freelance writer who hails from Birmingham, Alabama. annual event is open to all CVA members, but only one is chosen for a solo exhibition.

White was delighted at the chance to have the CVA Gallery to herself, though the sheer size of the space presented a challenge.

“I’ve had a year to sort of process the idea and work towards building a body of work that’s cohesive and will fill up the exhibition space,” she said. “It’s a big stage and it can carry big paintings. It’s a lofty goal, but it’s been fun to work towards.”

Extractions will feature 36-38 pieces of White’s distinctive abstract art. Each piece was created just for this show, with one exception. White’s painting entitled “after it all,” was the entry that won her the 2016 Juried Exhibition. It will be on display at Extractions both because it opened the door for her solo show, and because of its personal significance.

“I painted it in the weeks following the death of my best friend of 25 years. It was one of the saddest times of my life,” said White. “That painting flowed out of me quickly, effortlessly, and it put me on the road to healing. When I look at it now I don’t see the sadness, I just see love.”

Like all of White’s work, “after it all” is heavily layered with water based paints that have been built up and removed in sections. An underlay of drawn lines is barely visible beneath the paint, like something half unburied. !

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Arm-wrestling heroines muscle up for charity

BY IAN MCDOWELL Free Comic Book Day (or as some call it, “Geek Christmas”) is a big deal here.

When the City Council nicknamed their hometown “Comic Book City” in 2012, Greensboro had two comic shops, but that number’s since doubled. On May 6, the “fantastic four” stores will team up with Geeksboro Coffee and Beverage Company and the delightfully outrageous women of the Greensboro Arm Wrestling League for GRAWL Brawl V: We Could Be Heroes, an over-the-top throwdown proving that geeks can be female, muscular and civicminded.

“It’s an homage to our favorite comic book, fantasy and sci-fi heroes and villains,” says Amanda Lehmert Killian, the gala’s organizer and stage manager, who got involved with GRAWL after Geeksboro’s Rachel Scott first floated the idea.

“As always, we’re partnering with a local nonprofit, which will benefit from the ticket sales and donations made that night.

This time it’s the I Am A Queen Foundation that mentors young women in our community. Proceeds will benefit their annual teen girl empowerment conference

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MAY 3-9, 2017

PHOTOS BY BECKY VANDERVEEN

Arie Hell aka Shannon Reeves (Left) and Lois Pain aka Meagan Hooker. (Right) this summer. We’re so excited to help. Like us, they operate on a shoe-string, but they do so much good for our community.”

Amanda says GRAWLers are atypical philanthropists. “We’re young profession-

als -- teachers, librarians, government employees, middle and working-class moms.

We can’t afford a $200-a-seat fundraiser.

But we can give our time and creativity to come up with silly characters, design great costumes and put on one heck of a show at the affordable price of $6 per ticket.

Together, we can make an impressive impact. Since GRAWL started in 2016, we have raised more than $11,000 for local nonprofits. I am super proud of that.”

I also talked to two of the formidable women who will be competing at 8 p.m. on Saturday, May 6. Shannon Reeves, a 28-year-old who’s lived most of her life in Greensboro, will be wrestling as the “slaymaid” Arie Hell. “I was able to join GRAWL from the beginning, since I’ve known Rachel and Joe Scott from Geeksboro for years. I went to college for acting and writing, so the theatrics of GRAWL appealed to me. My characters are drawn from my favorite fandoms, Harry Potter (Sleazy Weasley) and Disney (Arie Hell).

My favorite Disney Princess growing up was Ariel, probably because she was also a redhead. One of the best parts of being a GRAWL gal is having new friends who share my interests. I can’t describe how cool and empowering it is to have a group of women who are huge geeks like me.

They really get me!”

The Slaymaid predicts that what her opponent is going to get from her is PAIN. “Arie Hell is sick of swimming and ready to stand on that GRAWL stage! She’ll be going up against UrslamYa the Sea Witch in the first round and her message to the Witch is ‘you can take my voice and my dad but you can’t take my attitude!’ She’s

one feisty little mermaid!”

The other arm-wrestler I talked to also promised to bring the pain. Lois Pain, that is. Lois’s alter-ego Meagan Hooker is a photojournalist for WGHP. “I’m 31 and have been living in Greensboro since 2004. I’ve known Rachel Scott for years, and when I heard about GRAWL I was immediately down to wrestle. This seemed like a great way to connect to other women in the community. Lois Pain is the personal hero I created for myself. She is a journalist like me, but she uses her superpowers to transform into her pop-art identity to fight evil. She is super strong and fights for truth and justice. Also, I loved crafting my makeup look for Lois, although the dots do take a while.”

Meagan is proud to be flexing her Biceps of Righteousness for I Am A Queen. “This is an area that has become near and dear to me in my work the past few years. I know they are doing great things with the youth and it’s encouraging because there is a big need for it here. I believe it’s really important for young women to see people like them succeeding. It’s empowering.”

She admits she was nervous the first time she arm-wrestled. “I’m so glad I had my husband and my son as my entourage there to calm and support me. I really do get my super strength and ability to do what I do from them and I think my character reflects that sentiment. Where would Lois be without Superman? I know this is about female empowerment, but the men in our lives are feminists too.”

The Greensboro Arm Wrestling League (GRAWL), in partnership with Geeksboro Coffee and Beverage Company and Acme Comics, Comic Dimension, Parts Unknown: the Comic Book Store, and Ssalefish Comics, will host GRAWL Brawl IV: We Can Be Heroes on May 6th in the Regency Ballroom of the Elm Street Center at 232 S. Elm Street in Greensboro.

Other wrestler personas will include Rosie “Captain America” Rogers, a certain Warrior Princess and the mean green She-Hulk. DJ84 will be spinning beats throughout the show and guest judges will be local filmmaker Jaysen Buterin, renowned illustrator Dan Dos Santos and the Mayor of Comic Book City USA, Jax Carignan. Admission is $6. Audience members are encouraged to donate more money throughout the event by contributing to their favorite wrestlers. Doors open at 7 pm. Arm wrestling begins at 8 pm. Tickets can be purchased online at www.geeksboro.com/grawlfcbd or at the door. Free parking is available until 9 p.m. at the parking deck at 211 S. Greene St. !

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May 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

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MAY 1884 DARK DAYS OF SORROW

Collection of the Wachovia Historical Society; photograph courtesy of Old Salem Museums & Gardens.

“Reid’s Farm,” c. 1895.

BY JENNIFER BEAN BOWER “oh Lord forgive this poor sinner” – Henry Swaim, May 1884 Harrison Reid’s farm was a place of laughter, lively conversation and natural beauty. Located near the Moravian community of Friedland in Winston-Salem, the farm was a popular destination for Moravian Sunday school outings and picnics. The Right Reverend Edward Rondthaler documented this fact in his remembrance for the year 1883, when he remarked “On June 28th the Home Sunday School greatly enjoyed their picnic at Mr. Reed’s [sic] farm,—the extensive yard and spring of which have frequently been granted for this purpose by the generous owner.”

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MAY 3-9, 2017

Nearly one year later, joy turned to sorrow when the farm became the site of “one of the most brutal and fiendish murders ever witnessed.”

On Monday, May 5, 1884, the family of Harrison Reid awoke and began their day as usual.

Ernestina cooked the morning meal for her family, and likely a few of the field hands, while the children prepared for a busy day on the farm. Harrison readied his rifle, as he planned to hunt down a hawk that had been killing his chickens.

“TERRIBLE MURDER” At the completion of breakfast, everyone except Ernestina left the house.

The children and field hands headed to the cornfield to plant seed and Harrison began his search for the hawk. He felt certain the pesky bird could be found in a tall patch of pines opposite the cornfield, so he headed in that direction. Once there, Harrison heard a faint sound in the distance. He thought nothing of it until the noise became louder and more intense.

He soon realized the shrieks were those of his wife and ran as fast as he could to help her. Upon nearing the house, Harrison caught sight of Ernestina. She was drenched in blood and stumbling toward the cornfield.

Harrison cried out to his wife and reached her just as she collapsed. In tears, he implored her to speak the name of the

person who had harmed her. Ernestina gazed into her husband’s eyes and in a faint whisper replied, “Henry Swaim, Henry Swaim, Henry Swaim.”

A few seconds later, Ernestina fell unconscious. Harrison carried her limp body into the house, where she died minutes later. Although distraught, he maintained his composure and summoned everyone from the field. Ernestina’s children, as well as the farmhands, were overcome by grief and sorrow.

Harrison sent two of his workers to retrieve the sheriff and it wasn’t long before the whole town knew of Ernestina’s murder. Within hours, the farm was overrun with people who had come to offer both sympathy and service. Sheriff

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Collection of the Wachovia Historical Society; photograph courtesy of Old Salem Museums & Gardens.

Augustus Fogle, c. 1890

Augustus Fogle was quick on the scene and organized parties of men to seek out and apprehend the assailant.

Coroner William Barrow was also onsite, as were six men he had duly sworn and impaneled to assist with the postmortem examination. After an extensive study of the corpse and testimony from Harrison Reid and others, Coroner Barrow and his jury of men reported: The deceased [Ernestina] Reed [sic], came to her death by a stab in the throat one and ½ inches long and 3 inches deep, severing the carotid artery [a second examination revealed that the carotid artery had not been severed] and sundry blows on the head, inflicting various wounds, to wit: 5 on the left side of the head near the top, 3 on the right side of her head, one of the back of her head, and one on her foreWWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

head, said wounds varying in length from 3 to less than 1 inch, all going to the bone, and two crushing the skull bone. From the evidence before us, we are satisfied said wounds were inflicted by a butcher knife, stone hammer, and an old axe, in the hands of Henry Swaim.

Sheriff Fogle’s men picked up their guns and began patrolling the county for Swaim who was described as a twentyone or twenty-two-year-old white man.

A few began their search at the Reid home where bloody fingerprints had been discovered on the back gate. They then followed tracks from the gate to a nearby creek where more blood was found. Their next stop was Swaim’s house, but no one was there. Swaim and his wife—a woman of “bad character”—lived on Harrison Reid’s farm. Both were employed by

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Collection of the Wachovia Historical Society; photograph courtesy of Old Salem Museums & Gardens.

John Cameron Buxton, c. 1915.

to keep watch outside. Afterwards, he addressed the crowd with words of justice and due course and encouraged everyone to return home. Much to the sheriff ’s relief, his words were heeded and the crowd began to disperse.

Sometime later, however, a large group of men—who were armed and in disguise—arrived at the jail and demanded entrance. Once again, Sheriff Fogle tried to talk them down, but it was to no avail.

Mayor John C. Buxton and Chief of Police W. G. Bahnson had been summoned to the jail and they too beseeched the men to disperse. Mayor Buxton assured them that law and order would prevail, but the mob booed his words. “Henry Swaim is wanted,” they shouted, “and we intend to have him.”

Then, all at once, the mob—who was described as an “orderly and in the main respectful” group of men—rushed the door of the jail. Once inside, the men beat the lock off the cell, slammed the door open, and commanded Swaim to come out. With no possible way to escape, Swaim slowly stepped forth and was grabbed, tied, and marched outside. As the mayor and lawmakers were well outnumbered—estimates ranged from 50 to 250 men—there was nothing they could do to stop the atrocity.

“THE MURDERER LYNCHED” The men marched Swaim through the streets of Winston and Salem and to the top of a hill that was located on “the Waughtown road.” At the top of the hill stood a large tree and it was there the mob stopped. Swaim was then permitted to speak, as several questions were put forth for him to answer. An eyewitness account of the inquiry, which was printed in the May 8, 1884, edition of the Union Republican, read:

Harrison and in fact, Swaim’s wife was in the field planting corn at the time of the attack. Her role in the crime, if any, is unknown.

The remaining men searched various areas in Winston and Salem, but they too came up empty. Later, and purely by chance, a few of Fogle’s men saw Swaim working in a cornfield on the outskirts of town. When Swaim saw the men approaching, he began to run; but when they leveled their weapons in his direction, he froze.

24 YES! WEEKLY

MAY 3-9, 2017

Swaim was handed over to Sheriff Fogle and escorted to the Forsyth County Jail.

Men and women followed the procession and shouted words of disgust at the young man. They had heard the gruesome details of Ernestina’s death and were eager to see Swaim punished. The hostility of the crowd was so strong that Sheriff Fogle was sure he would soon face a raging lynch mob. When they arrived at the jail, the sheriff placed Swaim in a cell and appointed a guard to stand duty.

He then organized a special police force

Did you kill Mrs. Reed [sic]?

He answered yes.

Why did you do it?

I don’t know; I wanted money.

Had you any help?

No. Where was you from 5 o’clock that morning until you committed the murder?

Behind Mrs. Reed’s [sic] barn.

What was you there for?

I wanted to see when they all left the house.

Where did you first strike Mrs. Reed [sic]?

In the house with the stone-hammer.

How many times did you strike Mrs. Reed [sic]?

I don’t know.

Did you hit her with the axe?

No, the axe flew off and I struck with the handle. I cut her after she fell and ran

down in the direction of the branch where I washed my hands.

After Swaim confessed his deplorable deed, he pleaded “won’t somebody pray for me?” One man stepped forward and then Swaim also prayed. According to the May 15 edition of the Western Sentinel, his prayer “ran something like this: ‘Oh Lord take me from this world once more!

Oh Lord save this poor sinner’s soul once more! I know I am guilty, and oh Lord forgive this poor sinner his sins.’”

Swaim then spoke a few words that he wanted delivered to his wife and mother.

“Tell them I wish them well,” he said, “and that I want them to be good.” He requested that his banjo and shotgun be left to his brother Charles, and said to give his boots to a neighbor he had stolen from.

Afterward, a rope was positioned tightly around Swaim’s neck. His hands and feet were tied and a handkerchief placed over his eyes. Two men lifted his body upward, as another fashioned the rope around a tree limb. Swaim and the rope were let go and it was then that the act became abhorrent to all who were involved. Henry Swaim did not drop, break his neck, and die. Instead, he dangled as his feet played touch and go with the earth. A couple of men tried to bring the hanging to an end by lifting up Swaim’s legs, but still he choked.

At one point, the young man’s body dropped to the ground “in a heap” at which point someone in the crowd exclaimed “My God men, we must not allow this!”

Once more Swaim was hoisted, as the mob hastily departed. It is said that one of the men, likely in an effort to end Swaim’s suffering, “withdrew several yards away and fired the contents of their arms in the direction of the hanging body.”

The body of Henry Swaim remained hanging for many hours after the grisly deed and crowds of people were reported to have viewed it. One such person was William Clinard, whose crayon portrait of the lynching was “one of the attractions to be seen upon the walls of a wayside grocery at Union Cross, on the road to High Point.” Eventually, the body was removed, examined, and buried, at the county’s expense.

Although public sentiment toward lynching was mixed, most everyone in Winston and Salem agreed that the city and county officials had done all in their power to prevent the terrible occurrence.

“The only comfort attending this unlawful transaction,” said the Right Reverend Edward Rondthaler in The Memorabilia of Fifty Years 1877-1927, “was that the particulars of the crime were correctly ascertained.” His words likely reflected the opinion of many.

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“A most estimable, kind and neighborly lady” The “brutal murder” of Ernestina Reid shocked “the people of Forsyth County.”

As reported by the Union Republican, she “was a most estimable, kind and neighborly lady of some 54 years of age. Her house was a favored resort for pic-nic [sic] parties…and there is scarcely a child in the twin-cities who does not have a pleasant recollection of this kind lady.”

Ernestina’s obituary, which appeared in the May 8 edition of the People’s Press, reiterated those thoughts. It read: Mrs. Ernestina E. Reed [sic], who was murdered on Monday, May 5th, 1884, was the daughter of David and Sarah Blum. She was born May 27th, 1830 and was 54 years old less 22 days. On December 25th, 1853, she was married to Harrison Reed [sic].

Their union was blessed with six children, three of whom preceded her to eternity.

As a daughter, sister, wife, and mother, she was kind affectionate and faithful.

The crowds of neighbors and friends, who assembled at the home of the deceased, and at Friedland Moravian church, where she was buried attest the highest esteem in which she was held. By special request, the funeral services were

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conducted by Dr. Rondthaler and Elder Wm. Turner. “God moves in a mysterious way,” etc., was sung, and Psalm 17:15, was the text used.

The bereaved family desire to return thanks to their neighbors and friends, for help and sympathy rendered in these dark days of their sorrow.

Three years after the murder, Harrison Reid followed his wife in death. The cause of his passing is unknown, but one has to wonder if the affliction of grief carried him to an early grave. It is also not known if the Reid children continued to live on the farm after their parents’ death. However, a photograph taken around 1895 documents an outing so lively that the viewer can hear the boisterous voices of the children and sense the pleasure of the day. The photograph, which is inscribed “Reid’s Farm,” gives evidence that the children, or other relatives, maintained the property and continued Ernestina and Harrison’s tradition of providing a place of beauty and merriment to all who entered their gates. !

In memory of Ernestina Eva Reid (1830-1884)

Grave of Ernestina Reid.

Photograph by Larry T. Bower, Jr.

MAY 3-9, 2017 YES! WEEKLY

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AGE: 24 HOMETOWN: Advance, NC BARTENDING: 1 Year Q: How did you become a bartender?

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MAY 3-9, 2017

Q:What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen while bartending?

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sThis week the cosmic agenda has calmed, so I have decided to write about the significant activity in this overall month. It will help you plan better than the shorter range week-to-week forecasts. In the next column I will return to the usual format for each sign.

A big piece of cosmic news is that Mercury is stationary direct on May 3, 2017.

The truth of the matter is that the period lasts an additional 2.5 weeks after the stationary date because the process of returning to normal speed requires additional time. Mercury’s retrograde purpose symbolizes the need to slow down, think and rethink everything, before proceeding with plans. It is ideal for those who meditate and who are working on self-study.

It is not favorable for moving forward with new plans because we will inevitably find something in error as we proceed.

The next 2.5 weeks of acceleration offer us the opportunity to regroup and make needed adjustments. The real finale of this Mercury retrograde occurs on May 20, 2017. It will become increasingly easy to arrive at conclusions and make decisions once the initial retrograding point has been crossed. If it were graphed, it would resemble the breakout point on a given stock at the NYSE. Many planets in the cosmos are conflicting with the others. That is the hallmark of this decade. War in the solar system represents opposition and intransigence on earth. We begin a two week period now that favors moving forward and finding solutions to issues.

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It isn’t exactly “peace on earth”, but this period may ease some tensions and open the door to communications among those who are in conflict. This is true in the big picture as well as for individuals.

Saturn is moving into a favorable position with Uranus. The exact date is May 19, 2017. The energy began early this year, but with all the noise in the solar system, its meaning has been blurred beyond consciousness. Saturn rules the old, the traditional and the status quo.

Uranus points at the new, the updated, the fresh idea or technology. When they meet in a favorable aspect, it is a good time to integrate the new and the old into an improved system. The aspect favors ordered, disciplined and gradual change rather than overthrow or rebellion. This is the month the two systems may find a workable blend.

I frequently need to choose a date for personal clients that favors whatever they are wanting to do. It just makes things work more smoothly. This has been nearly impossible to find since winter. However, I’ve recognized four specific dates in May that would be good for almost anything: buying and selling, medical treatments, putting a house or car on the market, to name only a few.

The dates are May 9 and 10 and again on May 17 and 18, 2017. Mark them on your calendar for the month! !

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[THE ADVICE GODDESS] love • sex • dating • marriage • questions

JIHAD ME AT HELLO

I’m a man in my mid-30s, and I’m dating a woman I really love. We match each other on so many levels, and I thought we Amy Alkon had a really great thing. But, recently, she seems to want Advice more than I can give.

Goddess Specifically, she’s prodding me to say “I love you” repeatedly throughout the day, and she blows up at me for not doing it enough. Though I do love her, the required affirmations feel hollow. But I am trying. Yesterday she called, and I told her, “I’ve been thinking about you all day.” She got super angry and said, “Then you should have called to tell me that!” WTH?! Where’s the line between being present for someone and being phony just to quell their unfounded insecurity? — Besieged Understandably, if your relationship is patterned on a movie, you’d like it to be “Love Actually,” not “Judgment at Nuremberg.”

Sure, things are looking bleak at the moment. In fact, the best thing about your relationship right now probably seems like the right to a speedy trial.

However, you may be able to change that — get back to the “really great thing” you two had — by understanding the possible evolutionary roots to your girlfriend’s morphing into LOVEMEEEE!zilla.

It turns out that perceiving things accurately isn’t always in our best interest.

In fact, evolutionary psychologist Martie Haselton explains that we seem to have evolved to make protective errors in judgment — either underperceiving or overperceiving depending on which error would be the “least costly” to our mating and survival interests.

For example, Haselton explains that men are prone to err on the side of overestimating women’s interest in them.

Evolutionarily, it’s costlier for a man to miss an opportunity to pass on his genes than, say, to get jeered by his buddies after he hits on some model. Man: “Yerrr pritty!” Model: “Um, you’re missing most of your teeth.”

Women, however, err on the side of underestimating a man’s willingness to stick around. This helps keep them from getting duped by cads posing as wannabe dads. And, as Haselton points out, a woman’s expressions of “commitment skepticism” may come with a fringe benefit — “more frequent displays of commitment” (like flowers, prezzies, mooshywooshy talk) from a man “who truly (is) committed.”

Unfortunately, your girlfriend’s expressing her “commitment skepticism” in exactly the wrong way — by trying to berate you into being more loving.

Practically speaking, this is like running alongside somebody and asking them to explain the tax code while they’re being chased by a mob with flaming pitchforks.

Because our brain’s “fight or flight” circuitry is also calibrated to protectively overreact, a verbal attack kicks off the same physiological responses as

answers [CROSSWORD] crossword on page 21

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[WEEKLY SUDOKU] sudoku on page 21

a physical one. Adrenaline surges. Your heart beats faster. And blood flow gets shunted away from systems not needed to fight back or bolt — like digestion and higher reasoning. This makes sense, because you don’t need algebra to keep a tiger from getting close enough for you to notice his need for Crest Whitestrips.

Only — oops — higher reasoning is exactly what you need when it’s only your girlfriend chasing after you for a little more loveydoveyspeak.

Of course, you understand that your girlfriend is a lady looking for your love, not a tiger looking to turn you into a late lunch. However, once that fight-or-flight train leaves the station, it keeps building momentum. (You can’t just treat your surging adrenaline like a bratty thirdgrader and tell it to go sit down.)

So, though the problem between you might seem to start with your girlfriend, consider what psychologist Brooke C. Feeney calls “the dependency paradox.”

Feeney’s research suggests that continually responding to your romantic partner’s bids for comforting (like expressions of neediness) with actual comforting seems to alleviate their need for so much of it.

This isn’t to say you should make like a meth-jacked parrot and start squawking “Awwk! I love you!” until — thunk! — you beak-plant on the newspapers lining your cage. Instead, start by asking your girlfriend why she feels a need for this daily stream of “affirmations.” (Some women get wiggy when, weekend brunch after weekend brunch, there’s never a diamond ring under their waffles.)

Next, explain the science, including Feeney’s finding. Then, pledge to be more expressive in general (holding her, telling her you love her), but explain that you feel insincere punctuating every text and conversation with robo I-love-yous.

As for her part, point out that if, instead of going off on you, she’d express her fears, it would put you in a position to reassure her. Ultimately, if you’re yelling “I love you!...I love you!” it should be because she’s running to catch a plane, not because you just can’t take another weekend chained to the radiator. !

GOT A problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405, or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol. com (www.advicegoddess.com) © 2017 Amy Alkon Distributed by Creators.Com.

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