YES! Weekly - January 19, 2022

Giada’s Trattoria

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JANUARY 19-25, 2022 VOLUME 18, NUMBER 3

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5500 Adams Farm Lane Suite 204 Greensboro, NC 27407 Office 336-316-1231 Fax 336-316-1930 Publisher CHARLES A. WOMACK III publisher@yesweekly.com

High Point will soon have plenty of options when it comes to eating out as part of plans to revitalize its downtown. STOCK + GRAIN ASSEMBLY is a 12,000-squarefoot vendor hall comprised of nine independently-owned food concepts and two bars: a centrally-located bar with a focus on craft cocktails and draft beer, and a patio bar that features seasonal drinks and outdoor activations.

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In downtown Kernersville, a historic brick factory building has been repurposed to house multiple shops and offices. It’s a retro-classic look, well suited for a restaurant. GIADA’S TRATTORIA is the casual Italian resident. As you follow the walkway to the front entry, notice the stack of wood on the right. This fires a huge wood oventhe real thing, readily visible from interior seating. A long community table flanks the bar area. Booths and chairs, unclothed, occupy several adjacent rooms.

6 When filmmaker PETER BOGDANOVICH died January 6 at age of 82, none of the obituaries or tributes mentioned that, from 2000-’05, he was a faculty member at the School of Filmmaking at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts (UNCSA). The reason was simple: He never mentioned it. Not once.

7 THE TENDER AGE is yet another coming-of-age parable, this one adapted by Oscar winner William Monahan from executive producer J.R. Moehringer’s best-selling 2005 memoir. Coming as it does this time of year, it could also be aptly described as

“Oscar bait.” As befits an actor-turned-director, George Clooney (doubling as producer) allows his actors to carry the narrative...

11 On Friday afternoon, it was announced that Guilford County Schools Superintendent DR. SHARON L. CONTRERAS would be leaving at the end of the 2021-2022 school year to lead The Innovation Project (TIP), a nonprofit collaborative working group of state school districts superintendents and their teams, as its next Chief Executive Officer.

She credited GCS staff members with her success and said she looks forward to working at TIP.

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A dream and a box of dog food.

That is what motivated John Woodlock, a dog lover and animal activist, to put the pamphlets down and pick up food for PETS IN NEED.

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Open mics across the Triad offer a gateway to up-and-coming artists looking to make good on resolutions to hit the stage.

Whether it’s comedy, songwriting, spoken word to talking dummies, there’s a Triad outlet with an OPEN MIC where artists can show up, sign up, and get on out there.

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DISTRIBUTION JANICE GANTT ANDREW WOMACK We at YES! Weekly realize that the interest of our readers goes well beyond the boundaries of the Piedmont Triad. Therefore we are dedicated to informing and entertaining with thought-provoking, debate-spurring, in-depth investigative news stories and features of local, national and international scope, and opinion grounded in reason, as well as providing the most comprehensive entertainment and arts coverage in the Triad. YES! Weekly welcomes submissions of all kinds. Efforts will be made to return those with a self-addressed stamped envelope; however YES! Weekly assumes no responsibility for unsolicited submissions. YES! Weekly is published every Wednesday by Womack Newspapers, Inc. No portion may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher. First copy is free, all additional copies are $1.00. Copyright 2022 Womack Newspapers, Inc.

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[SPOTLIGHT]

PROPOSED ORDINANCE COULD SILENCE KERNERSVILLE NIGHTLIFE

BY IAN MCDOWELL

A stricter noise ordinance proposed at the January 11 meeting of the Kernersville Board of Alderman could prevent some venues from hosting music in the evening.

Section 10-85 of last week’s draft by town manager Curtis Swisher and town attorney Edward Powell states: “If a commercial business has an outdoor entertainment area or has an opening to the outside and there is a residentially zoned property line within 300 feet of the area from which the noise originates, then the noise produced by the said entertainment must stop no later than 8:00 p.m. every day.”

As worded, “noise” is not restricted to sounds produced by “entertainment,” but the resulting discussion centered on live music.

Swisher pointed out that it would not affect every venue in town, or even every venue within 300 feet of a dwelling, but only those within that distance from an area zoned Residential. But the popular Brewer’s Kettle, at 308 E. Mountain St., would be impacted by the proposed regulation, due to its proximity to several properties on the 100 block of Broad Street.

“The town is as at fault as anybody else,” said Alderman John Barrow.

“They’ve gone down the street down there and rezoned from both ends, and left these four pieces of property right in the middle that are zoned residential.”

“Obviously, you know the main thing I’m concerned with,” said Andy Kennedy, owner of Brewer’s Kettle.

Kennedy stressed the need for more research into and measuring of decibel levels and expressed strong disagreement with “cutting me off at eight o’clock because I have a music venue, rather than allowing me a chance to follow set limits and take measures.”

Only one of the evening’s 16 public speakers supported cutting off downtown music at 8 p.m. This was John Owensby, publisher and managing editor of the Kernersville News, who owns four residential properties on the 100 block of Broad Street, around the corner from Brewer’s Kettle.

“I’m here to speak for those who can’t speak for themselves,” said Owensby. “I have one property, residents have been there for 16 years, and there’s a twoyear-old child that resides there. It’s the loudness of the music that’s keeping the baby awake.”

Those arguing against the 8 p.m. cutoff included downtown business owners Tammy Coulter, Shannon Duke, Jim Eglinger, and Tyler White.

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Owensby talked about is true, but it’s gobehind your newspaper.”

“I think the 8 p.m. noise ordinance is going to be a lot noisier right there on Broad “The noise does persist deep into the ing to kill the life that’s come to KernersStreet than it is in one of the subdivisions night,” replied Owensby. “These people ville,” said White. outside of town. It’s just that simple. It’s moved into these homes with the exMultiple downtown residents also spoke going to be nosier. We’re gonna work it pectation of living in a residential area. against the cut-off. Lucas White said that, out, but everybody’s gonna need some Nobody on this panel would tolerate this for him and his grandparents, the town tolerance, and they’re going to need to level of noise in their own bedrooms.” had become a place of healing after living be reasonable, and nobody’s going to get Apple said that the duty of the Board through three riots in DC. everything they want.” was not simply a matter of coming down “I’d hate to see 8 p.m. become the time All members of the board agreed more on one side or another of this issue. “Each when none of us can go out and really data was needed about decibel levels, and every one has the right to expect us spend time with each other.” with some discussion about whether it to protect their right to do what it is that “I happen to live within about 300 was a conflict of interest to use Kennedy’s they are doing to contribute to the quality feet from outdoor venues and bars,” said sound engineer or whether the city should of life in this town. You deserve to do what Robert Every, who lives on the 100 block pay for one of its own. Ultimately, it was you are doing, but in a way that coexists of Broad Street. “I can tell you that, with decided to do both. with those that have different interests my doors closed, I can’t hear any music. To “I make a motion to continue this and preferences.” take art away from these venues during consideration of the statute and to do this Apple expounded on these thoughts the pandemic is taking a lot from the city sound engineer the way that [Town Manfor approximately 15 minutes, provokand from the people here.” ager] Curtis [Swisher] was talking about ing expressions of discomfort from some Ricky Huffman said he’d lived in the doing it,” said Barrow. members of the public and at least one town for his entire life, and “never had Mayor Pro Tem Apple seconded, and the fellow alderman. entertainment in Kernersville up until the Board voted unanimously to do so.

“I’m committed to making this work,” last few years; a lot of my friends moved “It’s a work in progress,” said Mayor said Barrow. “The music culture that y’all to Winston, Raleigh, or Boone, because Dawn Morgan. When Barrow said, “we have developed up here in Kernersville is there was nothing to do in Kernersville but don’t want this dragging into July,” an important thing. We should get behind shop.”

Swisher replied that he did not envision it and do all that we can do to make it Downtown resident Angela McAfee disthe process lasting past February. ! happen. The expectation of privacy Mr. agreed with those who claimed that music from Brewer’s Kettle wasn’t disturbingly loud, but said she didn’t believe a cut-off time was the answer. “I really ask that you would look at the decibel level.”

Town Manager Swisher explained that, due to the addition of Section 10-88, Enforcement & Penalties, the Board could not legally vote on the issue until their next meeting.

“We don’t want the zoning office going out to enforce noises violations. So, we would want those to be a Class 3 Misdemeanor. But the new state law decrees that no ordinance specifying a criminal February penalty may be enacted at the meeting at 18 An Evening with The Machine which it is first introduced.”

Staffordcomments & John Ford Coley 19 Darin & Brook Aldridge After allJimpublic were made, 05, 2022 why 8 24 Hedy! The Life & Inventions AldermanSATURDAY, BarrowFEBRUARY asked Swisher of Hedy Lamarr Open 6:30pm // Show Starts @ 7:30pm p.m. was Doors chosen as@the cut-off . Swisher 26 Jon Reep There’s a warm these stars replied that was the wind timeblowing suggested by around as John Ford Coley and Jim Stafford take the stage.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 04, 2022 those who complained about downtown March Audiences will be entertained with hits like I’d Really noise during the school year “when you’re 07 Voctave Like to See You Tonight, and Love is the Answer by 25 Jump, Jive & Wail trying to get kids in bed.”

Ford Coley along with Spiders and Snakes, My Girl Bill with The Jive Aces “Eight o’clock doesn’t work for me, and and many more classics by Stafford.

26 Sons of Mystro I don’t think it works for any of the people who came here tonight,” said Barrow, who april requested that Kennedy take the podium 23 In The Light of Led Zeppelin again. “Andy, you’re willing to work with 29 Ballet Folklorico de Los Angeles the town, right?” Kennedy replied that he May was willing to bring in an engineer at his 15 Raleigh Ringers own expense to accurately record decibel levels at his business.

Acts and dates subject to change. For up to date Mayor Pro Tem Bill Apple asked Ownews, visit our website.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 05, 2022 ensby to speak some more about “folks who live back in the residential section visit: HighPointTheatre.com for more information | For tickets call: 336-887-3001

2021-22 Season

Garrison Keillor and the hopefull Gospel Quartet

Jim Stafford & John Ford coley

JANUARY 19-25, 2022

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chow

Calamari

Lasagne

Chow down with Batchelor at Giada’s Trattoria

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BY JOHN BATCHELOR

n downtown Kernersville, a historic brick factory building has been repurposed to house multiple shops and offices. It’s a retroclassic look, well suited for a restaurant.

Giada’s Trattoria is the casual Italian resident.

As you follow the walkway to the front entry, notice the stack of wood on the right. This fires a huge wood oven- the real thing, readily visible from interior seating.

A long community table flanks the bar area. Booths and chairs, unclothed, occupy several adjacent rooms.

Service personnel are friendly and prompt. Perhaps a bit too prompt, sometimes, as courses that should have been

Fucco Shrimp YES! WEEKLY

JANUARY 19-25, 2022

separate came out almost at the same time. You might consider ordering apps before entrees, rather than simultaneously, or just ask for the pacing you want.

The food here is worth a linger.

A couple of starters are downright spectacular. Fucco Shrimp (jumbos) are fried crisp, enhanced with a sweetish buffalo sauce, placed under a triangle of fried angel hair pasta. The pasta is crunchy, kind of nutty tasting. The shrimp would rank among the best for this style treatment. It’s a visual knockout, with flavor to match.

Italian Nachos may seem like an oxymoron. But the idea works. Homemade potato chips- meritorious in their own right- are interspersed with creamed spinach, crumbled Italian sausage, fresh

tomatoes, pepperoncini peppers, and mozzarella cheese. This is heavy in flavor, and it’s a monster portion. My wife and I paced ourselves and spread the leftovers over two more nights. I’d do it again, anytime. One misgiving- this was saltier than we would have preferred. I will ask for no salt added when I order it again.

I would have raved over the fried Calamari if I had not had the previous two starters. Instead, I’ll just say that this kitchen’s rendition is one of the best I’ve had in the Triad. Lightly breaded and flash-fried to golden brown, the mix of sliced tentacles are served with house marinara and Thai red-pepper chili sauce.

Each treatment is a positive enhancement.

Pizzas are named after a group of Sina-

tra friends known as the Rat Pack. The Peter Lawford combines freshly cooked chicken and celery, along with mozzarella and Gorgonzola cheeses, then adds ranch dressing and buffalo sauce. The ranch dressing makes the overall flavor mellow, while the buffalo sauce adds bite.

Crust, for me, is an essential element for good pizza. Baked in that large stone oven, Giada’s crusts definitely pass the taste and texture tests.

Entrees come with soup or salad.

Tomato-Basil soup conveys the essence of clean, pure tomato flavor undergirded by the herb. Chicken Noodle is rather mild, with small chunks of fresh meat. Salads are generously portioned. The House is primarily iceberg, augmented by slivers of carrot and red cabbage, plus Roma to-

Scampi

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Peter Lawford Pizza mato and cucumber. Spinach adds croutons and red onion, plus Roma tomato and bacon to the main ingredient. Caesar is crisp and lightly dressed, sprinkled with shredded Parmesan cheese.

Lasagna layers pasta, meat sauce, ricotta, Parmesan, Romano, and mozzarella cheeses, baked in the stone oven.

Another winner, another generous serving, spread in our case over two nights. With salad included in the price (and it’s often on Wednesday night special for $10), it’s also a screaming bargain. This travels well, so it’s ideal for takeout.

Saltimbocca is available with chicken or veal. Sautéed diced Prosciutto, spinach, and fresh mushrooms are tossed in mozzarella-Marsala cream sauce, presented over cheese stuffed ravioli. It’s a lush treatment that in my order served the chicken extremely well.

Seafood Scampi is unusual, in that it

Scallop Risotto includes sliced scallops in addition to the traditional shrimp. These are tossed in bowtie pasta with Roma tomatoes and spinach in a lemon-butter sauce. Sea Scallop Risotto joins seared sea scallops with lump crab meat, plus asparagus, peas, and pancetta in a white balsamic reduction over homemade creamy risotto.

Both these made me want to come back for some of the other seafoods.

We were full before finishing any meal, so we skipped desserts. Maybe on another evening.

Most of the time, most personnel were masked. Most recently, one was not.

When I inquired, she returned with mask on. Accommodating a customer is never a bad idea.

Jennifer Cartner has worked at Giada’s since the restaurant opened; she became manager about two years ago. Martin Carrillo has been chef “from day one.”

1/2 Price Wines on Wednesdays with Live Music! $6 Appetizers & Martinis on Thursdays Greensboro 5831 W Gate City blvd • (336) 852-8890 • www.giovannisnc.com Hours Mon – THu 5PM-10PM • Fri & saT 5PM – 11PM • sun 5PM-10PM WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

I really like this place! !

JOHN BATCHELOR has been writing about eating and drinking since 1981. Over a thousand of his articles have been published. He is also author of two travel/ cookbooks: Chefs of the Coast: Restaurants and Recipes from the North Carolina Coast, and Chefs of the Mountains: Restaurants and Recipes from Western North Carolina.

Contact him at john.e.batchelor@gmail.com or see his blog, johnbatchelordiningandtravel.blogspot.com.

WANNA

go?

Giada’s Trattoria, 210 N Main St Ste 292, Kernersville, N.C. 27284, 336-497-5316, giadastrattoria.com Hours: 4-9 p.m. Monday-Thursday, 4-10 p.m. Friday, noon-10 p.m. Saturday Appetizers: $9-$13; Salads: $9-$16; Soups: $4-$5; Pizza: $9-$17; Entrees: $14-$30; Desserts: $6.99 Most recent visit: January 12

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Learning the lesson of Peter Bogdanovich

W

hen filmmaker Peter Bogdanovich died January 6 at age of 82, none of the obituaries or tributes mentioned that, from 2000-’05, he was a faculty memMark Burger ber at the School of Filmmaking at the Contributor University of North Carolina School of the Arts (UNCSA).

The reason was simple: He never mentioned it. Not once.

They did mention his films, some of which — The Last Picture Show (1971), What’s Up, Doc? (1972), and Paper Moon (1973) — were critical or box-office hits, some both. They also mentioned the misses — Daisy Miller (1974), At Long Last Love (1975), and Nickelodeon (1976) — to say nothing of the hubris that came with success. (He said as much to me on more than one occasion.)

That he never made mention of his tenure at UNCSA, which is undoubtedly one of the best schools of its kind in the country, did not sit well with me. Teaching at UNCSA was hardly a career comedown, although I suspected he might have felt that way. It should be said that the School of Filmmaking rolled out the red carpet for him, granting him time off to work on other projects. He even received a Master of Cinema award from the RiverRun

International Film Festival — certainly a deserved accolade.

He penned numerous volumes on “Old Hollywood” (Orson Welles, John Ford, Howard Hawks, countless others) and was the personification of “New Hollywood,” which flourished all too briefly in the 1970s. The same could be said of his directorial career. According to long-time Los Angeles Times film critic Kevin Thomas — who knew Bogdanovich and socialized with him and ex-wife Polly Platt in the 1960s — “He made some terrible personal decisions that hurt his career.”

The rest of his career was an attempt to recapture past glories. There were some good films, Mask (1985) and Noises Off (1992) among them, and he was justly lauded as a historian and raconteur. He even resumed his acting career, most significantly as Dr. Elliot Kupferberg in HBO’s groundbreaking The Sopranos.

From time to time, I’d have dinner with Bogdanovich here in Winston-Salem. I drove, I bought, he talked. As an admirer of his work, it was something of a thrill for me. But I’m not sure if it was for him. We each did our impressions of former Paramount head Robert Evans. His was better, but he knew Evans better.

Some expressed astonishment that I would ask him about his relationship with Dorothy Stratten, the 1980 Playboy Playmate of the Year, whom he wooed on the set of They All Laughed (1981), and who was murdered by her estranged husband Paul Snider, who then turned the gun on himself. Bob Fosse’s final film, Star

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80 (1983), dramatized this tragic story.

As I saw it, I’m a reporter, I drove, I bought dinner, and he’d written a book — The Killing of the Unicorn — about Stratten. If he didn’t want to answer, he didn’t have to. But, as I found, Bogdanovich’s favorite subject was Bogdanovich.

Mind you, I do not regret spending time — or my money — with Bogdanovich. I did respect his work, my personal favorite films of his being his debut feature Targets (1968) and his 1979 adaptation of Paul Theroux’s Saint Jack, which features arguably Ben Gazzara’s best screen turn in the title role.

But, as time went on, I could sense a malaise in him. I think he tired of teaching and was anxious to somehow get his directing career back on track. To this end, he enlisted no less than Wes Anderson and Matthew Weiner as executive producers of what would turn out to be his final narrative feature, She’s Funny Like That (2014). Yet, even with a star-studded cast headed by Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston, the film was barely released theatrically, and although reviews tried to be kind, there’s a reason for that: It’s not very funny. It’s a film that feels out of touch. (I think I know why.)

How, you may wonder, do Quentin Tarantino and The Smurfs fit into the UNCSA equation? That’s a story for another time, but it’s an accurate one. At one point, Bogdanovich was teaching an entire semester on The Last Picture Show. I think it’s a fine film, but if I had to take an entire semester where the topic was one film, I seriously doubt I’d ever want to see that film again.

(Thomas summed up the notion of spending an entire semester studying The

Last Picture Show as “stupefying.”)

If that weren’t enough, for a time Bogdanovich had another faculty member grade his papers for him. How do I know?

The other faculty member, since deceased, told me, and I had no reason to doubt him, then or now. Another former faculty member, an admitted devotee of Bogdanovich’s work, called him “a fraud as a teacher.”

After he left UNCSA, I tried to stay in touch with Bogdanovich. I e-mailed him a few times, usually about his latest book or film appearance, but he never replied.

I guess he felt that there wasn’t anything I could do for him. I thought I’d given him more than fair coverage over the years.

Evidently, he felt differently. C’est la vie.

In recent years, the interviews he gave tended to be bitter, portraying himself as a put-upon, misunderstood, overlooked filmmaker. Thomas and I found these interviews depressing yet somehow in keeping with his character. (By the way, Thomas was among those who recommended that Paramount acquire Targets for release, but Bogdanovich never acknowledged that, either.)

Peter Bogdanovich. He hit the top. He hit the bottom. And now he’s gone. His whole life was Hollywood, and it can just as accurately be said that his whole life was a Hollywood lesson. Like his hero Orson Welles, whose career mirrored Bogdanovich’s in several ways (most of them unfortunate), he never could regain his standing or status in the Hollywood community, and I could detect frustration that subsequent generations of filmmakers had managed to play the Hollywood game much more successfully (Steven Spielberg, anyone?).

Never let it be said he didn’t have admirers who weren’t even born when his most noteworthy films came out. “To me, he excelled at painting the portrait of the sad and desperate with humanity, humility, and, yes, comedy,” said actor/screenwriter Matt Holly, who counts Mask a personal favorite. “Some of his movies were great, some were not, but they were always a Bogdanovich picture — success or flop. It’s a rare artist who is thought of as: ‘Although I never met him, I know him well.’”

Well, I met him, but I’m not sure I really knew him. But Holly’s right: Those films will live on, and they bear the unmistakable stamp of Peter Bogdanovich. !

See MARK BURGER’s reviews of current movies on Burgervideo.com. © 2022, Mark Burger.

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flicks

The Tender Bar: Home is where the heart is — and the beers are on ice

The Tender Age is yet another comingof-age parable, this one adapted by Oscar winner William Monahan from executive producer J.R. Moehringer’s best-selling 2005 Mark Burger memoir. Coming as it does this time of Contributor year, it could also be aptly described as “Oscar bait.”

As befits an actorturned-director, George Clooney (doubling as producer) allows his actors to carry the narrative, and they do so in an engaging fashion, particularly Daniel Rainieri, a newcomer who delivers a wonderful performance as the young J.R., who returns to Long Island in the early 1970s with his single mother (Lily Rabe) to live with her parents (Christopher Lloyd and the late Sondra James).

J.R.’s father, a New York disc jockey known simply as “The Voice” (Max Martini), is an abusive alcoholic who, luckily for J.R., is an absentee father much of the time. For guidance and mentoring, J.R. turns to his Uncle Charlie (Ben Affleck), a font of homespun, hardscrabble wisdom who tends bar at The Dickens, a local watering hole populated by loquacious and lovable regulars.

With a big assist from cinematographer Marin Ruhe, Clooney neatly nails down the distinctive blue-collar milieu of the ‘70s and ‘80s, augmented by top tunes of the day, and the friendly cast goes a long way toward making The Tender Bar as enjoyable as it is. Even when the film becomes more episodic in the latter stages, such good will has been established that it’s almost impossible to resist, even at its most sentimental.

Tye Sheridan plays the older J.R., and although he’s a bit mature to be playing a teenager, he’s such a talented actor that one can easily suspend disbelief. Besides, it’s hardly a new concept that someone WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

older than a teenager would still be cast as one (i.e. Tobey Maguire in the SpiderMan films and basically the entire cast of the 1973 classic American Graffiti).

If anyone, aside from Rainieri, walks away with the film, it’s Affleck, who has weathered his fair share — and then some — of tabloid torment for the better part of the last quarter-century, but has consistently proven himself a first-rate actor, to say nothing of a first-rate filmmaker. Uncle Charlie is a marvelously well-realized character. Less book-smart than street smart, there’s the distinct impression that he never could quite break away from the comfort zone of the neighborhood and is completely cognizant that J.R. should not make the same mistake.

Himself a fine filmmaker in addition to being a fine actor, Clooney’s 2002 directorial debut Confessions of a Dangerous Mind was an auspicious bow, and his 2005 follow-up, Good Night, and Good Luck, was an unqualified triumph. Even the overwhelmingly formulaic Leatherheads (2008) — which was filmed in Winston-Salem, incidentally — had its moments.

(Trivia buffs will note that Clooney and Affleck previously collaborated on the 2012 Oscar-winning Best Picture Argo and that both have played Batman on the big screen, although neither in particularly good vehicles.)

Rabe, Lloyd, Martini, Briana Middleton (as J.R.’s collegiate love interest), Max Casella (as a chum of Charlie’s), and Ron Livingston (who narrates the film as the adult J.R.) also offer solid contributions on the acting front, further confirming Clooney’s faith in his cast.

Even if it’s not as deep and meaningful as it aspires to be, The Tender Bar isn’t shallow and taken on its own well-meaning and well-acted terms, it serves up an appealing, nostalgic, wistful, and even whimsical slice of life — with a twist.

-The Tender Bar is available on Amazon Prime. !

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See MARK BURGER’s reviews of current movies on Burgervideo.com. © 2022, Mark Burger.

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feature

Stocked and Growing: Local food hall is gaining traction

H

igh Point will soon have plenty of options when it comes to eating out as part of plans to revitalize its downtown. Stock + Grain Assembly Chanel Davis is a 12,000-squarefoot vendor hall comprised of nine Editor independentlyowned food concepts and two bars: a centrally-located bar with a focus on craft cocktails and draft beer, and a patio bar that features seasonal drinks and outdoor activations.

Ericka Edwards, Marketplace Manager for Stock + Grain Assembly along with Shannon Donovan, said that the idea is for residents to have a common ground “regardless of dietary preferences.”

Edwards and her colleague will handle the daily management and operations of the food hall, along with marketing, community and corporate events, and event sales. The Triad native has a background in event and hospitality management and has held previous positions with Sterling Events Group, WinMock at Kinderton, and the Winston Cup Museum Special Event Center.

It will occupy the first floor of The Outfields building, located at 275 North Elm St., allowing for foot traffic from Truist Point and Festival Plaza. The $210 million Outfields revitalization project, funded by a public-private partnership model that includes the City of High Point, Forward High Point, and High Point University sharing the cost of construction, design, and investment, was approved in March 2016 by city council as part of the city’s downtown catalyst project. The goal was to produce jobs, expand dining and shopping while adding residential housing to the area, and ensure that downtown could be a gathering space for residents.

So far, there are plans for a new hotel, office community, and multi-family housing to name a few.

Edwards that everyone she’s spoken with is excited about the opportunities the new venue will bring. She said it has been fun to see the enthusiasm and support grown behind the project.

“Our goal is to be a big part of the growth that’s happening in High Point and a meeting ground for a downtown scene. This will be a place to go downtown WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

Ericka Edwards and enjoy cocktails, something to eat and maybe go over and watch the baseball game. So, people are very excited, and they kind of recognize that this is something the community of High Point has wanted and needed for quite a while.

Everyone that we’ve spoken with has been very excited about it and also very supportive.”

Developed by CANAdev, a Baltimorebased, full-service commercial real estate firm specializing in retail placemaking, Stock + Grain is gearing up for its grand opening celebration in Spring 2022 after delaying its opening in 2020, due to construction and COVID. “We do plan to hold an event that will really get the community excited and as a way to say thank you to the community for their support and involvement,” Edwards said. “The delay kind of helped sell the excitement. This feels like an exciting new era and we are starting to see things really come together. It really feels like it’s coming to fruition.”

The venue is designed with modern furniture and bright pops of color with the help of Davis Furniture and seating for more than 200 people. Outside, patio seating is offered that can seat more than 100 with a bar that looks toward the Rockers Stadium.

While food artisans will be the highlight of the food hall, there will also be room for retail tenants, although that aspect has yet to be finalized.

Chef Roddy Tate, Jr is the owner and operator of the Greensboro-based Go Yaki food truck “There’s currently room for growth but right now we are focused on the restaurants and the bar spaces,” Edwards elaborated.

That focus is not without reason. As of right now, Stock + Grain Assembly only has five restaurants committed, leaving four open spaces. Edwards is not worried and said that it’s about finding the right “chef” for the space.

“We have a couple of spaces that we have a pretty heavy interest in and really good traction on and then we have a couple of spaces that we are still looking for restaurant partners with. So there are still leasing opportunities but we are feeling really good about the way things are filling up and also just the variety that’s there,” she said. “We have a really great variety of products, great skilled chefs. We’re excited to see what else is in

the pipeline and how those other spaces fill up.”

Greensboro-based Chef Roddy Tate, Jr. of Go Yaki, has secured his spot at the food hall and will be offering his version of Afro-Japanese cuisine. Tate said that the partnership would allow his small business an opportunity to “gain further exposure.”

“The High Point area is growing and this will help us enhance our business into that market. This opportunity will give this area a chance to have the Afro-Jap experience,” he said. “Our customers are excited that we officially have a physical location for them to visit!”

For Edwards, it’s about getting to know the vendors, and how she can help them better their business.

“The most exciting piece for me is getting to know our vendors and underPAGE 10] JANUARY 19-25, 2022

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standing their stories, why they’re doing what they’re doing, and then helping to be a part of their growth. That’s a really important part, and a different part, of the community we focus on. Just local restaurant partners, their vision and how that plays into the community of Stock + Grain and the greater community of downtown High Point.”

So far, the following food artisans have been confirmed: Biscuits Brisket & Beer: Serving classic

smoked meats and Texas-style BBQ, Biscuits Brisket & Beer is the first restaurant from owner Chris Ryker, founder of NC Beer Pride. The menu will feature brisket, sausage, and smoked turkey breast, as well as biscuits with a variety of toppings.

Their “Wild Card Wednesday” menu will offer whole chicken wings, burnt ends, and beef ribs. Diners can expect to choose from five beers on tap to wash it down.

Pop’s Mini Doughnut Shop: Specializing in “made-to-order doughnuts in artistic flavors,” Pop’s Mini’s is a homegrown business from husband-and-wife A young man enjoys food from the Go Yaki food truck

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JANUARY 19-25, 2022

team Christopher and Margaret Headen.

Established in Atlanta three years ago, the black-owned business is now a favorite at High Point farmers’ markets and events. www.popsminidoughnuts.com Yumi Sushi: Specializing in Japanese cuisine & Taiwanese boba tea, Yumi Sushi is the first restaurant from industry veterans Jessica and Hsiao Shan Chen.

The husband-and-wife team are excited to bring together the culinary discoveries from their travels and their 20 years of combined experience in the best of Greensboro’s Asian restaurant industry to serve up sushi, customizable poke bowls, Japanese sakes, and more.

Damn Good Dogs: With a focus on gourmet grilled hot dogs and smash burgers, former police officer Jaquay Williams launched Damn Good Dogs as a mobile food cart in 2020. Williams said his mission is to connect the community with good food. Highlights of the menu include the Bacon Dog, Carolina Dog, New Yorker Dog, Philly Dog, Buffalo Blue Dog, as well as homemade chili and cheese dogs. The Damn Good Burger comes with classic toppings and condiments in addition to their Damn Good Sauce; and the Damn Good Fries are topped with warm cheese sauce, sweet onions, ketchup, and Damn Good Sauce. A 100% plant-based spicy Italian vegan sausage is also available.

Go Yaki: A passion for culinary arts inspired Roddy Tate, Jr. to start the Greensboro-based food truck, Go Yaki. A play on the Japanese word teppanyaki (a

dish of grilled meat and fried vegetables), Go Yaki simply means, “Go Grilled.” A mixture of two cultures and cuisines, Go Yaki has quickly become a community favorite, Afro-Jap experience. Among Go Yaki’s signature products are their Yaki Bowls, Boss Rolls (shrimp stir fry inside an egg roll), and Yaki Wangs — fried chicken wings glazed in homemade Mami white sauce and teriyaki sauce. Vegan and vegetarian options are also available.

Edwards said that having been around the Triad for quite some time now, and having seen the growth in Winston-Salem and Greensboro, you can see the High Point wanting to spread its wings also.

“You see the potential there, and you see people getting behind it. I think High Point has a great opportunity in its growth potential. I think the vision is there, and people are enthusiastic about it,” she said.

“We will be hosting a lot of community programming and events throughout the week. I think that we will be right on track with the surrounding areas in revitalizing the downtown scene.”

Local and regional food artisans and restaurateurs who are interested in learning more should email, leasing@stockandgrainhp.com. For more information or to book Stock and Grain Food Hall, visit stockandgrainhp.com. !

CHANEL DAVIS is the current editor of YES! Weekly and graduated from N.C. A&T S.U. in 2011 with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications. She’s worked at daily and weekly newspapers in the Triad region.

WWW.YESWEEKLY.COMW

“Second Dream Job”: GCS Superintendent takes CEO position at The Innovation Project On Friday afternoon, it was announced that Guilford County Schools Superintendent Dr. Sharon L. Contreras would be leaving at the end of the 20212022 school year to lead The InnovaChanel Davis tion Project (TIP), a nonprofit collaborative working group of Editor state school districts superintendents and their teams, as its next Chief Executive Officer. She credited GCS staff members with her success and said she looks forward to working at TIP. “Nothing I’ve been given credit for as a leader could’ve been accomplished without them. I’ve simply provided vision, and our equity warriors used all of their time, skill, and talent to eradicate the many enduring challenges and inequities too many of our students face. Inequities exacerbated by the pandemic. I am grateful now to step into the role of CEO at TIP. TIP is an organization with an extraordinary legacy and significant human, social and political capital. At TIP, we invited adults and children to think, act and work in new ways to achieve outside gains and student outcomes and eradicate racial achievement gaps that ultimately hold us all back from realizing our individual and collective potential,” she said. “I can not believe that I am blessed with the opportunity to have a second dream job. I thank all of GCS’s community partners who have been so generous with their support over these five and a half years… There are simply too many people and organizations to name individually. Most of all, I thank the parents for entrusting your children to us and supporting us through this pandemic. To the students, I say what I always say — I love you, I believe in you, and I will never, ever give up on a single one of you. You are why we do this work. Keep making me proud.”

TIP, co-founded by Gerry Hancock and Ann McColl, was created in 2015 to “provide a space for forward-thinking superintendents to address complex challenges in public education through innovation and collaboration.” The organization currently services 17 district members and a number of state employees, contractors, and others involved in or with expertise in educational leadership, policy, and program development.

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Sharon L. Contreras

Deena Hayes Greene

Winston McGregor

“We are excited that Dr. Contreras will be lending her experience and expertise to The Innovation Project,” said Dr. Kim Morrison, Chair of TIP’s Board of Directors and Superintendent of Mt. Airy City Schools.

“She is a well-known leader throughout the country and has led efforts in innovation and equity in her amazing career. The Innovation Project is a national leader in innovation, and Dr. Contreras will continue to champion work for children through this great superintendent-led organization.”

Contreras began her career as a high school English teacher before becoming a principal, and later a district leader, in Rockford, Illinois. She served as a chief academic officer in school districts in Georgia and Rhode Island.

She made history as the first woman of color to lead New York’s Syracuse City School District from 2011-2016 as its superintendent and later became the first woman, person of Latina heritage, and the first superintendent with a disability to lead Guilford County Schools in 2016.

Contreras earned a doctorate in educational leadership and policy analysis, and a master’s in educational administration from the University of Wisconsin at Madison; a master’s in English literature and English education and a bachelor’s in English literature from the State University of New York at Binghamton.

When asked what she’d miss the most when she left, she said it would be the children but admitted that she’s most proud of the community partnerships that have been made over the past almost six years.

“I love being around the students. I love being in the schools. I think the work that I’m most proud of is the work that the board of education has done with the board of county commissioners to get the first bond passed and seeing the schematic designs for the first few schools,” Contre-

ras said. “I’m already proud because I am confident that this community believes in the schools, the children, they support educators, that they are going to support this $1.7 Billion bond referendum so that our students have great places to learn and our teachers have great places to teach.

So I’m proud of the work we did with the facilities.”

According to the release, Guilford County Schools has increased academic achievement in all tested subject areas at all levels and for all demographic groups (2019), and successfully narrowed black-white and Hispanic-white achievement gaps. The district has dramatically increased student participation in tuition-free dual enrollment programs, achieved a graduation rate of 91.5%, and set a district record with seniors earning more than $193 million in college scholarships and grants.

“It has been an incredible privilege to work alongside Dr. Contreras for the last five and half years. A superintendent of her caliber, her commitment, her dedication, her passion for children, her courageous and bold leadership will be incredibly, incredibly difficult to replace. We value the work that she has done in this district under unprecedented circumstances. Yet still moved us forward,” said Deena Hayes Greene, chairwoman of GCS Board of Education. “We know that she will continue to work on behalf of public education. Of children. Of those who have been the most marginalized and left behind in addition to caring for and improving the educational environment for all students. We know that she will continue to do this work.”

At this time, the board does not have a time frame for a search process or Contreras replacement considering the sudden announcement.

“We’re just now having this discussion, and I think the full board needs to have the

opportunity to at least absorb this information and then have some conversation about a process,” Hayes-Greene said.

Winston McGregor, At-Large Board of Education member and president of the Guilford Education Alliance, said that she’s grateful for the transition period that the board is being given and that it is up to the community to help make its superintendent successful.

“I’m grateful that Dr. Contreras has given us this length of a ramp to adjust in transition and to think and act really clearly so that we can continue the work that’s happening. I would just add that when Dr. Contreras came almost six years ago, I was not on the board of ed, but I was at the Guilford Education Alliance, and at the time I said her success depends as much on us as a community as it does her and I believe that about all superintendents,” McGregor said.

“I have seen where this community business, philanthropic leaders, parents, faith leaders, students, principals — have poured into our kids over the last five and a half, six years. I think we own the responsibility as a community to continue this work.

Dr. Contreras has extraordinary vision but I think what’s most extraordinary about her is she actually is able to translate that vision into action and to call us and show us how to take very concrete steps to move things forward and she has taught us that. That we can move forward on things that almost seem daunting or too big to accomplish. We need to continue that work and to own that responsibility.”

Contreras will continue to lead GCS through the end of the academic year and will start with TIP in August 2022. !

CHANEL DAVIS is the current editor of YES! Weekly and graduated from N.C. A&T S.U. in 2011 with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications. She’s worked at daily and weekly newspapers in the Triad region.

JANUARY 19-25, 2022

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Fuzzy Friends pet food pantry goes mobile A dream and a box of dog food.

That is what motivated John Woodlock, a dog lover and animal activist, to put the pamphlets down and pick up food for pets in need.

“In June 2016, I Naima Said collaborated with St. Anne’s Episcopal Church to donate Contributor goods and food to pet owners who were in need. I worked with them up until the pandemic, feeding about 2,000 animals in 2019,” Woodlock said, founder of Fuzzy Friends. “When the pandemic slowed everything down, I knew it was the perfect time to focus on starting my own nonprofit. I had been contemplating it for a while and felt the push to proceed.”

After going out on a limb, Woodlock couldn’t believe it when he qualified for the nonprofit in 2021.

“I was blessed to announce I had launched Fuzzy Friends pet food pantry in August of 2021,” Woodlock shared. “An organization takes time, effort, and help.

I was lucky enough to have been able to recruit about 100 volunteers who took time out of their day to give out food and deliver goods to those who were struggling to take care of their pets or didn’t have the capability to come out and grab their necessities. I wanted to give a big thank you to three of our most active volunteers; The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Ms. Nicole Ealey, and Mr. Tony Friendly.”

Fuzzy Friends sets up in certain locations for each pantry drive, some of their most known locations being Pet Supply Plus and Reynolds Park recreation center.

“We are appointment only, so we see about 15 people each pantry day,” Woodlock said. “We used to have four pantry days, which aimed for the first and third Thursday of every month, and a weekend, but due to COVID and our now limited volunteers, we are only able to host one pantry in the winter and two in the spring/ summertime.”

Woodlock had a lot on his plate with the grand opening of his new pantry, so YES! WEEKLY

JANUARY 19-25, 2022

Kanika Brown, President of Fuzzy Friends food pantry

he decided to call upon a community activist he met at Morningside/ Reynolds Park Rd. Neighborhood Association to welcome to the team.

“The first conversation I had with John, we instantly hit it off. I could feel his passion for our fuzzy friends and knew with two strong leaders we would be invincible.

John offered me the President position and I took it. It has been about 6 months now,” said Kanika Brown, President of Fuzzy Friends. “My job is to help raise money and awareness for the organization while connecting with those who have special abilities or are unable to attend the pantry for a disclosed reason.”

Fuzzy Friends has an upcoming pantry drive on January 20 from 6 to 7 p.m. with items donated by three main donors — Pet Supply Plus, Animal Hospital Clemmons, and Discers for Whiskers.

“We are supplied with cat food, dog food, both wet and dry, miscellaneous items such as leashes, balls, and sometimes we receive bird food, but it is dependent on our needs and options given to us by our generous donors,” Brown said. “Our pet owners are able to come back to us every 30 days if needed.”

Before COVID, Fuzzy Friends had a criterion for receiving food. Those qualifications included residents that were Veterans, low-income individuals, special needs, and retired citizens. Since COVID, the organization has opened its doors to all pet owners.

“Everyone is struggling right now, and animals shouldn’t be punished for that.

Individuals are losing their jobs and having to give up their animals, the same animals that have become family in many homes,” Brown said. “Animals love us, take care of us, they are our therapy, what would we do without them? Our fuzzy friends are misrepresented, while they still have feelings and emotions just like us. We are paving a way for more animal rights. We must be their voice since they can’t talk for themselves. We must do it ourselves.”

Besides donating goods to pet owners, Fuzzy Friends highlights the importance of pet awareness and information, leading to more successful and healthy lives for their pets.

“Pets need to socialize and exercise.

It’s important for their health. It is also important to note the options of spaying and neutering to prevent unwanted litters, behavioral problems, and some health issues that may occur,” Lockwood explained.

Lockwood and Brown acted on this notion by hosting their first social event.

“Last summer, we partnered with the Marines since they are the only branch that honors service dogs and hosted our first event at Grace Court Park in downtown Winston,” Brown shared. “This was a way to connect with our pet owners and lovers in our community, spread awareness, and let pets socialize and stretch their legs.

The Marines were our guest speakers and brought some of their service dogs for others to interact with.”

The social event was family-friendly, open to all ages, with animal coloring books, a pet dress-up contest, and nail painting stations for pups. About 150 people attended the event and left a substantial amount of donations and optimism for future social events.

“We are proud of our success thus far and strive to finally open up at our own established location. That is our local goal,” Brown shared. “To expand nationally and internationally is the ultimate goal, and one I can see us achieving in due time.”

Brown, who recently announced her intent to run for District 71 State Representative, held a pet tea and coffee event, advocating that she stands not just for the community but the pets that stand by their stand. !

NAIMA SAID is a 22-year-old UNCG theatre graduate and host of Heeere’sNeeNee Horror Movie Podcast.

WANNA

help?

For more information about Fuzzy Friends, upcoming events, or to donate, visit their Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/fuzzyfriendpetfoodpantry. To contact the nonprofit directly, you can call 336-692-6207 or email fuzzy.friends. pet.food.pantry@gmail.com.

Donations can be mailed to Fuzzy Friends, P.O. Box 12703, Winston-Salem, NC 27117.

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tunes

HEAR IT!

O

Open mic offerings across the Triad

pen mics across the Triad offer a gateway to upand-coming artists looking to make good on resolutions to hit the stage.

Whether it’s Katei Cranford comedy, songwriting, spoken word to talkContributor ing dummies, there’s a Triad outlet with an open mic where artists can show up, sign up, and get on out there.

“Open mics are extremely valuable to the arts community,” said Bryan Toney, who hosts a musician’s open mic on Sunday evenings at Oden Brewing in Greensboro.

“They provide an opportunity for emerging artists to get more comfortable playing in front of an audience and more established artists to try out new material.”

Signups start at 5:30 p.m., each Sunday.

“When the weather is good, the open mic is held on their outdoor stage,” he explained.

“When it’s not, there’s a cool space inside for performance with a PA, microphones, guitar, and piano always available for performers.”

Each artist performs at least three songs, and while covers are allowed, Toney noted the performers end up playing mostly originals. “We’ve had everything from first-timers who have never performed anywhere to a rock band composed of local high school students to well-known local singer-songwriters. The audience is always attentive and very supportive, making it a great place for people new to performing.”

Comedians rule Forsyth County with comedy open-mics on Mondays (at Monstercade in Winston-Salem) and Wednesdays (at the Brewer’s Kettle in Kernersville).

Home to three weekly open mics, the Brewer’s Kettle offers free all-age openings for their Bluegrass jam (started by Mason Via—before he moved to Nashville and joined Old Crow Medicine show) on Mondays; and Backbeat Blue Jam (presented by the Piedmont Blues Preservation Society) on Thursdays.

In Greensboro, the Idiot Box Comedy Club welcomes jokesters to their Thursday night stand-up open mic. “It often sells out, and is incredibly supportive and a lot of fun,” said owner, comedian Jennie Stencel. “These mics are used to help cultivate talent in NC and we book talent from the open mics for our regular shows.”

Tickets are available in advance, and those who plan to perform should alert the host upon their arrival. Stencel suggests checking their website for other specialty open mics and workshops. “We do run other mics every week,” she noted, “but Thursday is the one EVERYONE comes to.”

While specialty open mics provide performative structure, others offer more open-ended possibilities. The B-Side Open Mic, presented by the Collective GSO (with hosts Virginia Holmes and Jha’mai) runs every Wednesday at Culture Lounge on Spring Garden Street. Operating as a sort of event-hybrid, the B-Side pulls creatives from across mediums and genres—incorporating visual art, along with scheduled performances, featured artists, a suggested “grown and classy” dress code, and music by DJ Mac DaVille.

COURTESY OF BT

Wild Roots Rising at Oden WWW.YESWEEKLY.COM

Around the corner, Gage Winslow takes a more casual approach every Thursday, at Common Grounds on Elam Avenue. “We welcome all talent including music, spoken word, and comedy,” he said, recalling one evening with a ventriloquist. “Every performer gets two songs, or eight minutes,” he explained, noting their new stage.

“Anything goes, bring it on.”

It’s the laissez-faire method employed by Matty “Mr. Open Mic” Sheets, who Winslow considers a major influence.

Upholding a single rule: ”No hate speech.

Be cool to everyone” Sheets has operated the longest-running open mic in the area, spending almost every Tuesday night for nearly 20 years, hosting thousands of artists across a handful of Greensboro venues.

He’s at the Green Bean these days, still on Tuesdays, although a little earlier in the evenings. “It’s the best thing I’ve ever done,” Sheets said. And one for which regulars, like Colin Cutler, are grateful.

“The first place that I saw rappers and spoken word poets live, and rubbing shoulders with comedians and punks and folkies, was at Matty’s open mic,” Cutler said, “it gave me an appreciation for all different styles of art. There are lots of good open mics in Greensboro. But, Matty’s is the best in my opinion.”

Turning toward the practice in general, “Open mics are a great opportunity to not only incubate creators and an audience but also for them to meet and network,” Cutler added. “It’s like church for artists.”

Toney agreed. “Each open mic has a unique vibe that appeals to different performers and listeners. Some are more focused on original music, some have more jam potential, and some are in venues that are more family-oriented. They’re all great at making the Triad such a cool place that supports live music.”

As for monthly endeavors, Out Loud Productions, an organization “determined to provide the local humble talent of Greensboro limitless opportunity to create Out Loud!” hosts the “Thinking Out Loud” open mic, at the Artist Bloc in Greensboro, with the next session running February 11.

For songwriters, Jack Gorham hosts a song circle on the first Tuesday of every month at Centennial Station in High Point, with the next coming up on Feb. 1. Meanwhile, guitar-slingers might feel at home at the Honky Tonky Open Jam, hosted by Mark Dillon at Four Saints Brewing in Asheboro on certain Sunday afternoons.

Of the many ways new performers can wet their feet, open mics make for a

welcoming and approachable first step.

So, as we roll into the middle of the first month, the time is nigh to make good on those resolutions and get on out there.

Good luck! !

KATEI CRANFORD is a Triad music nerd who enjoys spotlighting artists and events.

Best Nightlife in the Triad

Saturday 7pm This Week @ Breathe Wednesday 8pm Karaoke Wednesday with Mike Lawson Friday 9:30pm Dance Party with DJ Mike Lawsom Saturday 7pm Cocktails & Comedy Night with Ampston Hews ft.

Bryan Burgess

221 N Main St, Kernersville • Upstairs Wed & Thurs: 5-12 Fri & Sat: 5pm-2am JANUARY 19-25, 2022

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last call

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[THE ADVICE GODDESS] love • sex • dating • marriage • questions

DOWNWARD DOGHOUSE

There’s a woman in my yoga class I’d like to ask out. Though she’s friendly to me, I worry that this could lead to awkwardness in class if she rejects me or if we date but Amy Alkon things go poorly.

I have a two-year Advice relationship with this Goddess class — much longer than my fantasy relationship with her.

What should I do? Grow a spine and go for it regardless of the eventual consequences — or fish in a different pond? —Stuck Spines are not to be grown promiscuously.

In other words, there’s no one-sizefits-all answer to your question. Unlike 7-Elevens — pretty much the same in Boise as they are in Bumpass, Vermont — people vary wildly. Individuals have individual levels of “risk tolerance” (or what risk intelligence specialist Dylan Evans calls “risk

appetite”): their ability to bear potential losses, should their initiative go toiletward.

Take the question “Should you risk $5,000 on a seemingly profitable investment?” Well, that depends on who “you” are — emotionally and, in this case, financially. Because your risk tolerance will vary in different situations, answering that takes more questions — situation-specific questions. For example: Do you shrug off losses...or flog yourself bloody like the weird albino monk in “The Da Vinci Code”?

Financially, would losing the 5K be a bummer or an enduring nightly bummer when the inability to pay your rent leads to your taking up residence in a walk-in ATM? Apply this method to your dilemma, “Can I afford to ask out the hot lady from hot yoga?” Tempting as it is to overdramatize — rewrite what would likely be a somewhat uncomfortable situation into an epic disaster movie — drill down to the actual worst-case scenarios. For example, would getting a “Thanks, but I’m not ready to date” from the lady really trigger the giant zombie jellyfish apocalypse — or the rather mundane urge to temporarily relocate your mat to the other side of the room?

Consider that awkwardness between people — some big uncomfortable something hanging in the air — usually stems from somebody acting all weirded out.

There’s a remedy for this should asking her out go badly: preplanning to keep your cool — to act like the guy you were before you hit on her. In practice, how hard might that be? You’re probably inviting her to join you for “a coffee” after class — which few of us immediately recognize as code for “a midmorning orgy in my sex dungeon.”

SAVE THE INUNDATE

On dating apps, guys who message me always end up losing interest. My friend thinks my repeatedly replying before the guy writes back is the problem. I’ll reply to a guy’s first message and, while awaiting his response, have more to say and add messages (usually no more than four). I’m an enthusiastic person. What’s the problem with showing that honestly? —Authentic Woman Most of us bring an important understanding to our workplace: The fact that we have a feeling is not reason to let it give

us marching orders. That’s why, when our idiot boss makes us stay late to complete a “super important assignment” (busywork no one will ever look at), we say, “Sure thing!” — and only picture ourselves attaching battery cables to his nipples at a CIA black site.

Admittedly, anger is an obvious target for emotional restraint. But enthusiasm, while praised on elementary school report cards, should not be flung around like birdseed. Chances are your storm of messages — a monologue in the space for a conversation — sends the wrong messages about you, such as: “desperate” and “has the social skills of a 5-year-old.”

Unfortunately, avoiding the impulse to act on our emotions is hard work. Psychologists Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky explain that emotions are “fast”: popping up immediately — automatically — and motivating us to act. Rational thought, however, is “slow” (and, frankly, lazy). We have to yank it out of bed and feed it a bunch of mental energy to make it do its job — for example, explore whether our emotions’ directives might have ruinous consequences. This feels, shall we say, unfun — and also depressing when all

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we can do is damage control after some off-leash emotion has blown up our life.

Consider that the “job” in online dating is not getting someone to like you but seeing whether you like them enough to take it beyond the small screen. As an experiment, you might put your impulse to reply on a strict diet: One message from a guy.

One reply from you. Period. As a perhaps helpful model, try to come off like a rare vintage of fine wine — that is, hard to get — as opposed to red wine spilled across a white shag carpet (impossible to get rid of...save for a willingness to broaden one’s stain removal methods to include arson). !

GOT A PROBLEM? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave., #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405, or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com). Follow her on Twitter @amyalkon. Order her latest “science-help” book, Unf*ckology: A Field Guide to Living with Guts and Confidence. ©2022 Amy Alkon. Distributed by Creators.Com.

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