YLM April 2015 | #58

YLM

YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Green HOMES + FUNERALS

WIN! A MEAL FOR 2 AT THE OAKSMERE WEEKEND TICKETS TO PETER ANDRE

CLASSIC CARS

SPRING GARDENS

LOUISE GRIDLEY

HELP TO BUY EXPLAINED

MERRICK HILL INSURANCE

EVENTS DIARY

free ISSUE 58 APRIL 2015

loving life in Norfolk & Suffolk

YLM

WELCOME 9 STORIES GEIR MADLAND 10 “I was a dentist for twenty years.

My father was a dentist. He came over to Edinburgh to study, from Norway, hence the name.”

FOCUS HOME GREEN HOME What does eco/green building look like today?

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CARING FOR YOUR FUTURE 44 New premises for Merrick Hill Commercial Insurance

SPRING FORWARD 18 “Having pruned the roses back in March, it’s now time to give them a good feed; this will help to promote good strong growth and great flowers over the summer.”

LOOKING FOR A NEW HOME? 47 Help to buy might be an option

THE LOFTY LARCH History of and use for

A STAR Proof that apprenticeships do work

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WOMEN IN BUSINESS

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CLASSIC REASONING What’s on your list of top classics?

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IT’S O.K. TO BE NORMAL The pros and cons of the Renault Zoe

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BOOK CLUB

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COMPETITION TIME

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WHAT’S ON

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DIRECTORY

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RE-NEW, RE-USE 23 Just a little thought and imagination can save pounds on a home renovation WELCOME 24 The Oaksmere Introduce their new Executive Chef - Alan Dann HAVE YOUR CAKE & EAT IT Baked Easter treats

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GREEN AT LAST 29 Kim Greenacre gets us thinking about our eco legacy WAX WORKS 32 Where did this whole hair removal thing start and how long has it been around?

NEW IN AT DREAM ON A little peak at what’s new for Spring / Summer

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TRANSFORM YOUR LOOK The latest Dream On makeover

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CLASSIC REASONING p54

PAINTED FACES 39 “Replicating a moment in paint seems much more real and honest; it allows us a glimpse of the human spirit. “ — Suffolk Painter Louise Gridley LOVE LETTERS Sometimes it’s fun to be old school

CONTENTS

PROTECT YOUR EGG 48 Are your Cash ISAs suffering from record low interest rates?

PAINTED FACES p39

WOMEN IN BUSINESS p52

THE DINING ROOM 66 A short story by Geir Madland

GREEN AT LAST p29

“Alan took control of the kitchen of Lower Slaughter Manor in the Cotswolds gaining national acclaim...”

CONTENTS

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WELCOME

WE’RE MOVING TO THE COUNTRY! Circuit Media will be closing the Diss Office on 31st March It’s been fun being town mouse but we’ve been getting fat on all the cakes from the bakery! We’ve also realized that we miss our walks by the river and jumping up and down on the trampoline after the school run!

You will still be able to get in touch with us in the usual ways. If you really need to speak to us in person let’s meet up for a coffee somewhere nice.

ENQUIRIES T 01379 642 044 E info@ylm.co.uk

BY POST YLM 3 Hales Yard Diss Norfolk IP22 4AF THE YLM FAMILY

CONTRIBUTORS Geir Madland Kim Greenacre Bridget McIntyre Lanassir Lawes Joan Garnham Gabi Reid Gemma Harvey Geraldine Walters Leighten Ball Louise Priest Chris Lilly

April is a time of year that makes me think about many things, one of which is how I have a son who is now 14 years old and taller than me! I find it quite scary how fast time goes by and as I get older it seems to pass even quicker!

I am feeling really excited about moving from our Diss office and our future with YLM and Circuit Media. It’s looking very bright and we have lots of positive things up our sleeves for the coming months.

In the April issue of YLM we have lots of interesting articles for you to read, I have to confess to already having been and looked at all the new seasons clothes at Dream On. I love the colours for this season and I got excited to see all the new stock; it’s well worth a trip to go and have a look!

I have also really enjoyed the piece on green funerals by the lovely Kim Greenacre on page 29. It is really thought

provoking and I found it so interesting. Ben and I chatted about the article and our wishes and thoughts after reading it. It’s fascinating and I would imagine many people may have those same conversations.

The setting of GreenAcres is stunning and so peaceful. I love the ethos of woodland burials and we all need to think about a greener future. Talking about this subject can be hard for some people but I believe it’s a positive thing and can help when that difficult time comes.

Make sure you check out our amazing competitions; win two tickets to see Peter Andre and stay at the wonderful Potters on page 61 and, also, The Oaksmere have a competition on page 24 to win a meal for two. A good chance to try the new á la carte menu - yummy!

Have a happy and healthy April and I hope you enjoy the latest YLM.

SUBSCRIPTIONS Enquiries to info@ylm.co.uk using the word ‘Subscribe’

PHOTOGRAPHY & CREATIVE DIRECTION Wendy Aiken wendy@ylm.co.uk CREATIVE & EDITORAL Ben Aiken ben@ylm.co.uk CREATIVE Matt Bignell matt@ylm.co.uk ACCOUNTS Janet Fairweather janet@ylm.co.uk DISTRIBUTION Dayburst Couriers 07810 852 089 dayburst@diss.co.uk

COVER Wendy Aiken Photography

YLM is Published by Circuit Media (P&L) Ltd. Disclaimer: The views expressed by the contributors are not necessarily those of the publisher. Every effort is taken to ensure that the contents of the magazine are accurate but the publisher can not assume responsibility for errors or omissions. Whilst reasonable care is taken when accepting advertisements the publisher will not accept any resulting unsatisfactory transactions. They will, however, immediately investigate any written complaints. © Circuit Media (P&L) Ltd, 2015

MARCH COMPETITION WINNERS Brome Grange: D. Rant, Diss | Bury Theatre Royal: S. Foreman, Bury St Edmunds Wordsearch: J. Morris, Scole | Sudoku: D. Chenery, Harleston

get connected WWW.YLM.CO.UK t @YLMUK f @YLMUK

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WE’RE MOVING TO THE COUNTRY! Circuit Media will be closing the Diss Office on 31st March It’s been fun being a town mouse but we’ve been getting fat on all the cakes from the bakery! We’ve also realized that we miss our walks by the river and jumping up and down on the trampoline after the school run!

You will still be able to get in touch with us in the usual ways. If you really need to speak to us in person let’s meet up for a coffee somewhere nice.

01379 642 044 info@ylm.co.uk

YLM | YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

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started writing for ylm because Wendy and Ben asked me to. I’d completed a proofreading course and approached them to offer my services in that respect, having spotted the odd typo, pedant that I am.

We came to an arrangement whereby I would write occasional pieces on local characters and issues, and also help to

Geir

STORIES

married and starting a family.

Unfortunately when you stop dentisting, there’s no obvious alternative use for your talents.

I started retraining as a Primary School teacher. It was hard work, especially with the youngest children, and I had to accept that I wasn’t quite cut out for it. I’m now working in the local Secondary School as a Cover Supervisor. I mind the

GETTING TO KNOW YOU #02

JACK OF ALL TRADES…

Getting to know our second contributor: Geir Madland proofread. That was eighteen months ago. I’ve got to meet and write about some very interesting types, and I’ve even been paid once or twice!

I try to bring out the particular personality and passions of my subjects. Now Wendy has asked me to write about me. So, I’ll try to describe what makes me peculiar.

I’m often struck by how decided some people are about what they want from life, from an early age too. I am the opposite. As I approach my half century, I am still deciding. I was a dentist for twenty years.

My father was a dentist. He came over to Edinburgh to study, from Norway, hence the name.) He and my mother met at dental school though she didn’t stick with it. My sister’s a dentist too, and married to one.

I wasn’t very imaginative in my choice of career but it seemed like a good idea at the time. I enjoyed being a student and managed to string that out for a good many years but eventually it was time to do some proper work, especially as I was

class when the teacher can’t be there for whatever reason, which means I can be doing any subject any day of the week. I enjoy the variety – it’s a bit like being a Primary teacher but with older students – and of course there’s no planning or marking to do.

I act the part of the teacher at least. Acting is one of my interests. I’ve been in the Dove Players panto in Eye for the past few years and I really enjoy that.

Supposedly it’s a youth theatre group but I don’t let that stop me. I did tell myself initially that I was going along to support my two but I don’t think anyone really believes that anymore.

Simon, Jules and Charlotte are very encouraging. My wife got me onto an adult theatre workshop in Norwich for a Christmas present and I’ve just signed up for the second term.

I’ve also toured the whole of Thorndon with the Thorndon All Stars, doing my best to entertain the locals with my unique vocal abilities.

We did some covers of British rock through the decades

to celebrate Her Majesty’s Golden Jubilee. Bless her. We may even be getting the band back together this summer! I shall be tuning my ukulele in case. Though in case is probably where it should stay. And Wednesday night is Morris Dancing night with the redoubtable Hoxon Hundred. Hootenanny!

Further generous encouragement has come from Becky at the Bank in Eye. She and Chris and Jules and everyone there are smashing. They’ve brought something really special to the town, and Becky has been very kind about my painting, getting me to contribute to several exhibitions. I’ve tried my hand at still lifes and local landscapes.

I’ve even sold a few. I took the kids to see Timothy Spall in Mike Leigh’s Mr Turner before Christmas and came away with thoughts of being the next JMWT, splodging a bit of sun between the clouds. No sales there as yet - work in progress.

As for the writing, I haven’t made any progress with the great novel, just a few short sto-

“I took the kids to see Timothy Spall in Mike Leigh’s Mr Turner before Christmas and came away with thoughts of being the next JMWT.”

ries. Instead I’m doing a bit of freelance writing here and there and I’ve been getting some very good novels sent to me for proofreading by a publisher in the Highlands, whom I contacted via email a year ago. I’m thinking of visiting them sometime, maybe this summer.

All in all, I may not have bagged a second career just yet, but I’m enjoying the chase, and the variety, thanks to the support of my family and the friends I’ve made since moving to these choice parts.

So, that’s me. Peculiar enough for you? •

You can read a story story by Geir Madland entitled ‘The Dining Room’ on page 66

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FOCUS

HOME GREEN HOME

Does Green Design make a Desirable Dwelling?

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ome time ago an article in The Daily Telegraph reported on the ten best ecohouses in the UK. At the time the article went to print, the houses were at the cutting edge of eco-technology and all included ground source heat pumps or bio mass boilers, under floor heating, triple glazing on doors and windows, solar panels, layer upon layer

Words by Kim Greenacre

of insulation, building materials from recycled or renewable sources and had been envisaged by eco-savvy architects who had broken down the barriers of design. What they didn’t have, in my humble opinion, was desirability.

The ridiculously expensive price-tags aside, the simple fact for me was, they were ugly. All of the houses seemed to lack any of the attributes that I consider important in a building that I want to actu-

ally live in. As a collective they seemed to suggest that eco credentials could only be gleaned at the expense of a welcoming facade and homely appeal. If one had only looked at that particular article for inspiration on how an ecofriendly house should look then I think it would not be unreasonable to imagine that it may have had some folks, who were considering venturing down a more sustainable route, smartly re-tracing their

steps back towards a more traditional abode.

With that thought in mind I really wanted to know if there had been any significant changes in the approach to eco/green building, if the designs for new builds had softened somewhat and if the extensions or refurbishments that had been made to existing buildings over the last five years had paid more than a passing nod to conservation.

After very little research I >

FOCUS

realised that so much is changing within the construction industry and these changes apply not only to the national house-building companies that construct estates across the UK but also the smaller local builders and trades people, who are faced with trying to retain the quality of their workmanship, keep their prices competitive and work towards meeting the criteria of a changing world.

These changes are predominantly driven by the guide lines laid down by the government in the Code for Sustainable Homes. This code is the national standard for the design and construction of new homes that do not impact on the environment quite as significantly as what was acceptable a mere decade ago. The code aims to reduce carbon emissions and promote higher standards of sustainable design above the current minimum standards set out by building regulations.

Fortunately the information on the www.gov.uk website is very easy to read and offers some insight into why the buildings that win eco awards are not necessarily the most

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beautiful. The nine measures for sustainable design that the code is based on include: • • • •

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Energy/CO2 Water Materials Surface water runoff (flood- ing and flood prevention) Waste Pollution Health and well-being Management Ecology

Each new home is rated over these categories for sustainability performance by a 1 to 6 star system and overall performance is then gauged by the total score. It would make sense to assume that when an individual or large contractor is hoping to secure permission to build a new dwelling the chances of a successful application would be increased by incorporating as many of the measures mentioned in the code as possible. Adherence to the code is currently voluntary but the government does intend to make it mandatory in the future.

As I read through the guide lines I could see why each one of the measures was important

and by honouring them every time a new house was built there would be a less damage to the environment. There was no doubt that over time our national fossil fuel consumption would be significantly reduced, the use of raw materials managed in a sustainable way and renewable energy would become the rule rather than the exception. Part of the guide even focuses on the importance of lifestyle in an eco home. Low maintenance materials used in the building will mean that we will not be spending our valuable leisure time painting the fence or window frames and central vacuuming systems will certainly win favour by reducing the amount of hours dedicated to domestic chores each week but, all these positives aside, I have to report that the casestudy homes featured on the gov.uk website were not very easy on the eye.

When viewing the images I had to assume that the budget of the featured case-studies was but a fraction of the ten houses featured in the Telegraph all those years ago but sadly the lack of appeal was equable. I had hoped, after

being enthused by the plan and its objectives, that the end result would have looked a little less like Dr. Spock’s summer residence and a little more Norfolk circa 2015.

If the eco new builds remain aesthetically disappointing must we deduce that the stunningly beautiful structures, added to traditional Norfolk homes to extend and enhance living space, must be the antithesis of the green build ideal?

Apparently, this is not the case at all and even though many Norfolk homeowners, who consider extending, are not driven by a green ideal but do list fuel economy as a very important aspect of design specification and eventual construction. This keen eye on household running cost is fast becoming the decision driver when selecting heating options, insulation products and the u-values of glass used in the enviable expanses of bi— folding doors and roof glazing which allow the big Norfolk sky into these lucky homes.

Now that government grants have dried up decisions about solar panels are now based on the amount of time you have >

“Low maintenance materials used in the building will mean that we will not be spending our valuable leisure time painting the fence or window frames and central vacuuming systems will certainly win favour by reducing the amount of hours dedicated to domestic chores each week.”

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in which to make your money back – if you think you will be moving within five years will you recoup your investment?

Probably not, but if you are extending or renovating your home and fully intend to pass it to the generations below, the initial expense of the panels and installation will be outweighed by the long term financial gains of selling the unused power back to the grid.

So even though the original idea may not have been green the solution to saving money via reduced energy bills can usually be solved by green technology. Reclamation is another resource-saving initiative that is not usually based on environmental issues but on how the new part of the building will look. Many extensions are of course built onto very old houses and the choice

YLM | YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

of bricks and tiles is usually governed by what was used on the original building. A match with the original masonry can only be achieved by sourcing reclaimed bricks and this decision, initially driven by aesthetic appeal, is recycling at its very best. The same is of course true with the tiles and some reclaimed timbers, however the re-use of old timber for building is regulated.

Another important aspect of extending a building that is already standing shares similarities with the ethos of renewal; why start again and use even more of the earth’s fast dwindling natural materials and resources? Save what can be saved, clean it, repair it and re-love it – if this rings true for an old kitchen chair why not the materials to build the kitchen? Perhaps the au-

thenticity of the old materials form the beautiful heart of these additions or maybe the owners, already caring deeply about the building they live in, approach the project with more love? Whatever the reasoning behind these delicious hunks of old bricks, oak and glass which are attached to so many fine Norfolk homes, it seems to me that the outcome is preferable to square box with sempervivum for a roof.

Surely a partially green home, which is beautiful in its own right, situated in and amongst nature and, by being so, is a place where a family can thrive and grow, must factor highly on the health and wellbeing section of the Sustainable Building Code? •

“Save what can be saved, clean it, repair it and re-love it.”

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what’s happening in Gabriel’s Garden?

of breathtaking beauty and in a gentle breeze send showers of delicate petals like snowy confetti to lie in drifts on the ground. The common Hawthorn and Blackthorn of our native hedges transform the countryside. On the verges strong shoots of Cow Parsley emerge and the sweet scented wild Cowslips can be found on sunny banks. Within weeks one cannot imagine how it could have been bare for so long. I wonder though, are we in for a soak? Will it be the Ash before Oak or the Oak before Ash, in for a splash!

Easter is early this year and I’m creating natural arrangements using beautiful emerald moss to create rustic pots for fragrant flowering bulbs and delicate Primula. These moss pots are ideal to hide a jam jar in, full of exquisite spring blooms. Displays using lichen covered twigs, buds and blossom and lots of gorgeous spring flowers, all are perfect to have

SPRING FORWARD The lighter evenings mean more to do in the garden

Words by Gabi Gabriel’s Garden

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his April I’m creating rustic, natural arrangements and floral displays using found and foraged for materials and beautiful spring flowers.

Spring is well on the way in the garden and all around the

bare boughs and branches of winter are slowly coming back into life. How remarkable, marvellous and dependable our wonderful seasons are; the hedgerows and lanes are transformed. The first vibrant leaves unfurl in the most vivid of greens, tight buds of blossom appear in pinks and whites, open to form abundant clouds

“My obsession for dahlias just keeps growing.” as a decorative table centre, to simply enjoy or to give as a lovely gift.

In the garden the tulips I planted last year are putting on good strong growth, with a few early varieties already in flower; Jenny, an apricot orange variety, flushed with pink, looks lovely with the rare Ranunuclus-Pauline Violet.

The grey - green foliage plant Cerinthe complements them well and happily self seeds itself all over the garden. The Perennials that have lay dormant all winter create healthy mounds of fresh green leaves. I love the

feathery texture of Pyrethrum and already the first annuals are in flower in the poly tunnels; Ammi Majus, wild Stocks and Calendula Marigolds.

Having pruned the roses back in March, it’s now time to give them a good feed; this will help to promote good strong growth and great flowers over the summer. The Viburnam Tinus has finished flowering, and needs cutting back and re shaping, it has to be the best of the winter flowering shrubs. I have one that has been in flower since late November, it’s great for cutting, looks good as a filler in bouquets and is relatively hardy.

In the green house the Dahlias have put on good growth; I’ll start to take cuttings from the strongest shoots and if all goes well, they’ll be ready in time to take to sell at the Bungay Garden Market in May. My obsession for dahlias just keeps growing! I find them ir-

HOMES & GARDENS

“In the garden the tulips I planted last year are putting on good strong growth, with a few early varieties already in flower; Jenny, an apricot orange variety, flushed with pink, looks lovely with the rare Ranunuclus - Pauline Violet. The grey-green foliage plant Cerinthe complements them well and happily self seeds itself all over the garden.”

resistible and with well over 45 different varieties I cannot help myself but add to the collection. In the past I’ve been drawn to bold and brilliant colours but now I’m adding pastels to the mix with the delightful cream and peach Cafe au Lait, the soft pink Wizard of Oz and a peachy pink variety, aptly named Peaches. •

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED

As some of you may know Gabriel’s Garden has grown from a wonderful vision into an amazing reality and the garden and business is literally growing, it has been an incredible journey but in order to take the business to the next level I need some help!

Would you be interested or know someone who would be keen to help out with some jobs in the garden; planting, weeding, sowing seeds and potting on in the greenhouse. I would also like some help with basic administration and IT skills to help me be more organised!

The work in the garden can be quite physical and some experience would be required, I’m looking at flexible hours on a Monday or Tuesday.

If you could spare some time I would love to hear from you.

01379 677 793 hello@gabrielsgarden.co.uk www.gabrielsgarden.co.uk Gabi Reid 4 Common Road Gissing Diss IP22 5UR

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KEEP YER HEEL DOWN BOR Wotcha! Oim fair t’ middlin’ thanks fer askin’. Well, spring ha sprung so wotta we gonna do wiv our toime?

Loike me, yer probably scratching yer head and wondering where to start?

Me wee wifie were in the greenhouse yesterday sowin’ stuff, while I wus at the allotment sowin’ me parsnips.

I nearly gave up. There wus such a strong So’ westerly that although I wus tryin’ to sow ‘em in ‘stations’ they were blowin’ all over the place. I usually sow radishes in between the ‘stations’ to show where the rows are, but I’ll sow them under glass later.

It’s gonna be an interestin’ time at the allotment this year; next door is the Council garden - a wild flower garden they call it – though oive only known thistles grow there (yes, I knowevery weed is a wild flower (not Mares Tail!) - and this year they’re gonna have an archaeological dig. Don’t seem logical t’ me! Oive been diggin at me allotment 36yrs and I ain’t found s’ much as a Wagon-Wheel penny. Thinks. Wonder if them boffins and High School pupils could help me wiv my tunnel thru’ t’ the Bank!

Dew yew keep on troshin’ and here’s a question fer yer; why do gulls follow the plough but never the spade?

Because they’re afraid of getting clubbed! Git it?! Yer gotta laff!

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he larch (Larix) is a small genus of less than a dozen species of deciduous conifers.

We first hear of larch from Julius Caesar (80BC) when he laid siege to an alpine fort built of larch; he discovered that burning brush wood against the walls had no effect.

Larches are hardy and found at altitudes up to 2,500m in the northern hemisphere. They resist the cold as they are rich in resin preventing the living tissue freezing.

In 1885 the Duke of Dunkeld planted 11 Japanese larch (Larix kaempferi) next to the European Larch (L.decidua) The resultant cross seedlings proved to be more vigorous and of higher commercial value – the Dunkeld Larch.

The wood is hard, heavy, knot free, and decay resistant. Turpentine is distilled from the resin. The Dukes of Athol (the planting dukes) covered the Scottish hillsides with over 14 million. Primarily they were looking to make their fortunes selling the wood to boat builders, unfortunately about this time saw the birth of the iron ships. The main uses now are for yacht building, fence posts and garden furniture. The Forestry Commission use them to shelter plantations.

The caber, tossed in highland games, is made from larch and is approximately 19ft 6in long and weighs 175lbs. In natural medicine, a bark infusion has been used to treat urinary tract infections, bronchitis and coughs. It’s part of the Bach Flower remedies to achieve balance and harmony.

The larch typically grows to 40m and is long lived; the oldest is in Val Malenco, Italy

HOMES & GARDENS

THE LOFTY LARCH Mighty & Magical

“The larch typically grows to 40m and is long lived; the oldest is in Val Malenco, Italy at 980yrs.”

at 980yrs. The most northern forest is Dahurian Larch (L.gmelinii) which is thriving 200km beyond the timber line in Russia. The oldest forest was planted in 1738 in Lintula, Scandinavia and was made a world heritage site in 1991.

The Japanese Larch or money pine was used in bonsai, some of these miniature trees are now priceless, hence the name. The specially dwarfed trees symbolise mortality and the changes wrought by the seasons.

In alpine legend the Saeligen or ‘Blessed Ones’ live in larch and protect people and animals. In Siberian tradition, the soul of the Shaman is reared in the larch and larch groves are considered sacred.

Personally I think of them as one of the signs of spring when the purple female flowers (or roses) appear before the lime green needles. • Words by Joan Garnham Waveney Tree Specialists

Mark dayburst@diss.co.uk

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HOMES & GARDENS

RE-NEW, RE-USE

Giving new life to tired interiors

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ften the perception of getting an Interior designer in is that they will want to throw everything away and start again with a client’s home but

that is just not true.

During a first visit to a new client’s home I will always ask what items they would like to keep and often I will try to find a new place in another of the clients rooms for discarded items- It’s amazing how transformed a piece can look in different surroundings.

Reupholstering an old chair or sofa that is well made and comfortable is definitely a good option, these pictures shows a client’s garden room with a variety of sofas that they have ‘collected’ over the years, the corner sofa was passed on to one of the parents and one of the red sofas was recovered in a green tweed wool that we matched to a new smaller sofa. The garden room was calling out for a bigger rug so we reused the small rug in the lounge and it works perfectly!

Mirrors often date or feel wrong due the colour of the frame so we toned down the gold colour of an existing

“It’s amazing how transformed a piece can look in different surroundings.” one in the sitting room by dry brushing it with a metallic bronze. Another alternative would be to spray the frame if you are looking for a glossy lacquer look.

Just a little thought and imagination can save pounds on a home renovation! •

Words by Lanassir Lawes Swank Interiors

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A M E AL

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WELCOME The Oaksmere Introduce their New Executive Chef - Alan Dann Alan started his career at the world famous Waterside Inn where he worked with the Roux brothers for 3 ½ years before rugby and cooking took him to France! During his six years there Alan worked alongside some of the world’s finest chefs including: Michel Guerard, Pierre Gagnaire, Michel

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Lorrain and George Blanc, all of which hold 3 Michelin stars.

On his return to England in 1996 Alan took control of the kitchen of Lower Slaughter Manor in the Cotswolds gaining national acclaim and many awards including the coveted Michelin star. (Alan tells us that he first found out after walking into the kitchen the morning after returning from Australia! - what a great welcome home!) After four years Alan returned to France for a further 10 years, owning his own hotels and restaurants in the Alps, Lyon and Monaco.

He returned to England in 2009 and set up his restaurant consulting company and now, after his marriage last year,

Alan has decided to settle in Suffolk. Things have been pretty hectic but they have managed to get to Bury St. Edmunds and Norwich. The coast is next once the weather improves.

Alan is very excited about the chance to work with some of our great local suppliers and this is reflected in the new Á la carte menu featuring Norfolk samphire, Gressingham duck and Aspall cyder.

Now The Oaksmere not only boasts a great fine dining experience but new pub and prix fixe menus where the focus is on excellent local produce and great Sunday Roasts such as the roast loin of Blythburgh Pork with crackling.

Alan has also put a twist on traditional pub fair with freshly made pies, Scotch eggs with runny yolks, Adnams battered

haddock and duck and pork cassoulet. The prix fixe menu is available lunchtimes and dinner midweek at £19.50 for two courses and £24.50 for three. You can see a full list of menus at www.theoaksmere. com/restaurant.

With food like this available you might want to stick around and if that’s the case why not make a night of it (or two!) and book into one of our luxury bedrooms. After all, what goes well with great food and wine? - a great lie down! •

MENU

FOOD & DRINK

Á LA CARTE MENU

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- STARTERS Crab filled cucumber ribbons with chilli lime and coriander - £8.50 Pressed foie gras terrine with caramelised onion & apple, fig compote & white port jelly - £11.00 Hot House smoked salmon with saffron rouille & beetroot salad - £8.00 Herb crusted goats cheese panna cotta with tomato chutney & olive croute - £7.50 Rabbit ravioli with white bean cappuccino truffle oil & fresh chervil - £8.50 - MAINS Roasted breast & braised leg of local pigeon with sweet potato millefeuille & red port sauce - £18.50 Pan fried pavé of turbot with smoked pancetta sauce, Norfolk samphire & glazed salsify - £21.50

For more information, 01379 873940 info@theoaksmere.com www.theoaksmere.com f The Oaksmere t @Theoaksmere

For a chance to win a meal for 2 at The Oaksmeres’ superb restaurant, simply answer the question below.

Q Where did Alan get his first Michelin star?

Braised Blythburgh pork cheek & slow cooked pork filet mignon with Heritage carrots, broad beans Aspall cyder jus - £17.50 Seared scallops with peas, saffron potatoes & tempura sorrel - £19.95 Treacle and ale marinated ‘chateaubriand’ for two to share with Rosanna pink onion tart tatin, fondant potatoes, vegetables & red wine sauce - £26.00 per person Chick pea socca with grilled Provençale vegetables & spiced caponata - £13.95 SIDES Oaksmere salad, mash, chips (triple cooked chunky or skinny), seasonal greens, seasonal mixed vegetables, new potatoes, Chantenay carrots - £3.00 each

Enter via email to competitions@ylm.co.uk using the word ‘OAKWIN’ Please be aware that entries will be automatically to added to our mailing list. Use the word ‘OAKWIN-N’ if you do not wish to be contacted in the future.*

- DESSERTS Strawberry cheesecake with maple basil sauce & strawberry sorbet - £7.50 Hot pear souffle with pear compote & Eau de Vie (10 mins) - £8.50 Dark chocolate fondant with white chocolate saffron sauce (10 mins) - £8.50 Iced lemon parfait, lemon curd and meringue with mini doughnuts and confit fennel - £7.50 Assiette Gourmande (a selection of mini desserts) - £16.50 Selection of local cheeses with quince jelly & chutney - £8.50 Coffee & petit four - £4.95

Prices include 20% VAT A 10% service charge is added to parties of 6 or more Please make us aware of any food allergies

*T&C’s - You must include your name and telephone number. The winner will be picked at random out of a hat, the judge’s decision will be final. Drinks not included. This prize is non exchangeable. The vendor reserves the right to suspend, cancel or modify the terms of the competition at any time without notice. The Oaksmere will contact the winner by email. Closing Date 30/04/2015. Entries after this date will be accepted but not entered into the prize draw.

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have your cake & eat it!

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FOOD & DRINK

Creative Easter this Baking

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an you believe it is Easter already? It seems like we only just put the Christmas decorations away!

So it’s the time of all things egg, rabbit, chocolate and Spring-like as we say hello to “This lovely lamb cake is this new season and the very a Victoria sponge, held welcome bank holidays. What together with buttercream better way to spend some icing, some piping work and of the bonus free time than some fondant icing.” to get your apron on and try your hand at some baking?

Now I really enjoy making – carrot cake with a cream cakes, but don’t pretend to cheese frosting covered with be a ‘celebration cake’ maker coconut; so yummy. The – far too fiddly and there are basket cake was something of far more talented people an adventure – a triple layer than me out there who do a chocolate cake to give it more marvellous job. I just thought height, iced as usual, then I would try to turn my hand to ‘woven’ with a rather sticky a few simple ones. mixture of melted marshmalThere was no special lows and cocoa to create the equipment needed – just glossy basket. standard 7 or 8 inch sandwich So why not think past the tins – two of those and you Simnel cake and hot-cross can make any of the cakes buns? A bit of imagination pictured. can create wonders – it So the choice is yours – doesn’t even have to be a what could be simpler than cake – this pastel-layered chocolate sponge cake sandpavlova is a super treat for the wiched and covered with family or guests this Easter. • chocolate butter cream icing, studded all over with chocolate eggs? It looks stunning and tastes divine – perfect for the chocolate lover in your family. Or for the children this lovely lamb cake is a Victoria sponge, held together with buttercream icing, some piping work (anyone can do rosettes) and some fondant icing – next time I think I’d Words & food by Gemma Harvey flavour both the cake and Cherry Catering Company icing with lemon. The rabbit shaped cake was such fun

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ENVIRONMENTAL

GR EEN AT LAST

Planning for your Greener Future

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or many of us living a greener life is something we aspire to. We know that our planet is in danger. We know that something must be done and it must be done soon or our grandchildren will face potentially catastrophic consequences. Most of us are vaguely aware of the science behind this phenomenon: exhaust = holes in the sky. Holes in the sky = planet getting warmer. Planet getting warmer = climate changing (and not in a barbecue assured paradise but more likely “a nothing will germinate let alone grow” kind of heat that will only be marginally cooled by the acid rain that will fall from a purpleblack sky). Yet we still have to be cajoled into putting the soft plastic into the correct bin and harrumph every time a trip to the bottle bank is required.

YLM | YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Our intentions to live greener are often thwarted by the demands of our day; the school run, getting to work on time, getting back in time to collect the children and the weekly supermarket trip all usually require motorisation. The suck, squeeze, bang and blow of the four-stroke engine are mighty convenient. These conveniences we deem as essential rather than a privilege and our green aspirations are valet-parked whilst we dash around the planet as efficiently as possible.

Our laundry is washed and often dried electronically, our gardens are tamed mechanically and the housekeeping chores are magnificently assisted by the appliances provided by the likes of Dyson and Hoover.

The long-haul holiday is often the punctuation mark that separates and makes sense

Words by Kim Greenacre

of the rest of our year. We are “This ecologically sound computerised, pasteurised and alternative to conventional homogenised – our lives are alburial and cremation has most dictated to us by a society a lot to offer anyone who that demands much and judges appreciates the outstanding us if we do not perform as exbeauty of English woodland or pected. a native flower meadow.”

To make the changes that would significantly reduce our personal impact on the planet requires a commitment that sound ways to overcome the most of us are just not ready to obstacles that these questions make. Before we would even throw up, the inconvenience consider making such a massive factor and the thought that the change there are many quesrest of the world would pass me tions that we would demand by, prevent me, from commitanswers to: If I opt out and live ting and paying anything more a clean, green life then will I than lip-service to the key enviearn enough money? How will ronmental issues. My life is too I heat my home? Will I be able important to me. If this stateto grow enough food to feed ment is true, and I honestly fear my children? My elderly parents that it is, how am I ever going to live thirty miles away – how will appease that small but insistent I visit them if I don’t use fossil part of me that knows I am confuels? And, whilst there are eco- nected to this planet and that friendly answers to all of these I should be doing something, questions and environmentally anything, to protect it? >

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I suspect that there are many other people who, despite the discomfort it causes, have to admit that they would prefer not to alter their lives too drastically in an attempt to reduce their personal carbon footprint.

With this realisation perhaps we need to look at something that would have a positive impact on the environment and that we could all sign up to now – a green burial.

This ecologically sound alternative to conventional burial and cremation has a lot to offer and not only to an un-conscientious eco-warrior such as me but also to anyone who appreciates the outstanding beauty of English woodland or a native flower meadow.

GreenAcres Woodland Burials – Colney was established fifteen years ago and is one of five parks in the GreenAcres group.

The philosophy of the company is simple and reinforces the principle of life’s regular renewal. A green burial offers the opportunity to embrace and contribute to the cycle of life.

A return to source, an understanding that at the end of this mortal life. we can become part of the

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natural environment and our passing will not seem so final – in some small way we will continue to be.

All of the GreenAcres parks are also managed as havens for wildlife and the regeneration of native woodlands. Specialised management techniques have been developed to incorporate the burial process within a long-term plan to restore and extend native woodlands. Most of the burial plots are double depth, which means that, when required, a second person, usually a family member, or loved one, can be laid to rest in the same grave. This is not essential but for most the thought of our partner being with us should provide a little comfort. I have also discovered some interesting and, quite frankly for me, comforting information that I would never have even considered before researching this subject. If end of life planning has taken place (now firmly on my to do list) and a preference for cremation has been made by one of a partnership but the other stated a desire to be buried then both the body and the ashes can still be buried in the same grave at Colney. Likewise

if both are cremated – their remains can be interred into the same grave. For enduring and long-lived partnerships what could be nicer than to know that death will not separate you forever?

As a company, GreenAcres Woodland Burial Parks impress further with their outstanding commitment to the long-term protection of land and the wildlife under their care. A percentage of the purchase price for each interment is paid directly into a secure Trust Fund, which will finance the long-term maintenance of the parks and the on-going provision of its services. By the time the parks are full they will have been transformed into rejuvenated native woodland and protected under the conditions of the Trust. This provision highlights a direct contrast to the heavy financial burden of alternative provisions; GreenAcres Woodland Burial Parks will remain as permanent assets for the local community

and future generations.

The everyday running of the company is a living and breathing example of best eco practice. All of the buildings were designed to enhance the landscape they sit in and built using timbers and materials from renewable sources. The boiler that heats the buildings and water is bio-mass and runs on wood-chippings, the electricity is from a renewable energy source, all of the stationery is from FSC approved suppliers and even the tea and coffee are fair trade and organic. Their commitment is genuine and the environmental awards they have won are testimony to this but there is so much more that makes GreenAcres Woodland Burials – Colney, the perfect final resting place.

The woodland and meadow at Colney are quite simply beautiful; in early spring the snowdrops and pussy willow confirm hopes that winter is over. In May the bluebells come

ENVIRONMENTAL

“Specialised management techniques have been developed to incorporate the burial process within a long-term plan to restore and extend native woodlands.”

and throw a stunning azure carpet over half the woodland and in the autumn beech trees glow like bright lanterns. The graves are not laid out in rows, separated from the beauty as is traditional. No! The graves are part of the beauty; those that are laid to rest at Colney, circle the trees and their wooden memorials, let friends and strangers alike know who they were and how much they were loved.

The peace and tranquillity that greets you as soon as you drive through the gates of Colney seems to lay a warm blanket over the wood even on the coldest of days and the birdsong provides a hopeful accompaniment to the saddest of times.

The Woodland Hall sits amongst the trees and is often the place where people hold a service to say a final farewell to their friend or loved one. The hand-made stained glass door panels, the lectern carved from a tree that suggests the spread of family branches and the

spectacle of the forest which dominates the view through the floor to ceiling glass wall, adds another magical dimension to this very special burial ground.

The longer you stay at Colney the more you realise that this is very much a place for the living as well as the deceased. As much as I prefer not to think of my family coping with my demise I can visualise them here after I die and I know that an environment like this, where even my darling little dog would be allowed to visit, would offer far greater comfort than a municipal cemetery or crematorium garden. I think they would find some kind of peace here and I would rest easy knowing my last act, at least, was green.

•

For further information on GreenAcres Woodland Burials – Colney please visit www.greenacreswoodlandburials.co.uk/colney

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HEALTH

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Go Ahead and Strip Off

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refined and youths commonly removed their leg hair to show off their legs in their short tunics. Methods included burning their hairs off and using pine resin – a sticky substance that would have adhered to the hairs, similar to modern wax.

The fall of the empire led to a decline in hair removal in the outposts of the Empire, such as chilly Britain but it came into favour once more as the Crusaders brought in Eastern

a xing is the most popular of all salon treatments. From brows to bikinis and down to toes, this method of hair removal has been with us for the last millennia.

We hear daily how something as simple as a half leg wax can take a woman from dreading spring to welcoming those longer, warmer days. We “Modern women have the also know shaving our bikini confidence to make their own area, at any time of year, leaves choices as to whether to go fur us with razor burn and somefree or as nature intended.” times nasty ingrown hairs. But would we have reached for the hot wax naturally, where did this whole hair removal thing practices and hair free apstart and how long has it been preciation again. How fashion around?

First, it’s no modern fad. The alters our perception of beauty and sensuality is evident in art. ancient Egyptians removed all Ironically, the hair free body is their hair from their armpits to now seen as erotic, when the their pubic hair and, although Renaissance painters showed people had been removing all their nudes hairless because hair since the cavemen using it was the hair itself that was sharpened flints, the Egyptians deemed as sexy, indicating developed the format closwomanhood. The nude, nude est to modern waxing. The was respectable, as you can ‘day spa’ can be dated back see in any gallery. to the Roman Empire, where Modern women have the going to daily baths for steam confidence to make their own and massages, the men were choices as to whether to go fur free or as nature intended.

Their main concern is the expectation of a smooth, long-lasting result with as little discomfort as possible. Most have been introduced to depilation at a time when the strip wax products have been most prevalent. This is the type of Words by Geraldine Walters wax that is thinly applied with Btec HND/Cert Ed. a wooden spatula and then www.geraldinewalters.co.uk removed with a paper or linen

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strip. It’s quick to cover large areas, such as the legs and is an inexpensive product. But it’s not the best product when it comes to removal of underarm or pubic hair which is stronger and coarser. Nor is it the best for removal of male hair. And many more men than care to admit would like some of their body hair removed! Gone are the days of the gorilla-chested man. The current vogue is smooth. So the wax to look for is hot wax (also known as non-strip). It’s the traditional product for hair removal. It grips the hair in a shrink-wrap style, making removal kinder on the skin. It’s also the product of choice for eyebrow stylists and those who offer facial hair removal because it is less aggressive. But it needs good training and for a while was lost from the college syllabus.

For safety, check your therapist has an immaculate trolley and is wearing gloves. Spatulas

should only be dipped once and make sure you are given aftercare. Most insurance companies now require this to be written as well as oral. Keep your skin in good condition by exfoliating the day before you wax to remove dead skin cells, lift the hairs and enjoy a more comfortable waxing treatment.

If you’re in any doubt as to whether waxing is for you, or you’re trying a new brand, you can always ask for a patch test.

Then you can look forward to a long, hot soft and smooth summer. •

Family run business offers six luxurious 4 star holiday properties sleeping 2 to 15 Foresters, Augusta & Madge are all rated suitable for wheelchair users by Visit England, as well as being great for families Free leisure club membership, swim, jacuzzi, sauna & gym Superb quiet location. Blue flag beach, shops, family pubs, theatre and 18-hole golf course all within 200 metres Free WIFI, gardens and off road parking Free pick up from Sheringham train and bus stations

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FASHION

1

3

2

DARLING Top £35 & Pencil Skirt £45

BEAUTIFUL RINGS from £12.50

BELOVED Neon Print Top £29

NEW IN AT DREAM ON PENNYBLACK Summer Stripe £95

POMODORO Pretty Summer Dress £54

perfect for summer

SEE CONCEPT Glasses & Sunglasses from £27

CAPRI Top £69

Beautiful PEONY Scarves £18 EARTH SQUARED Butterfly Bag £30

APRIL 2015

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FASHION

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Ann discovered Dream On through a friend. She came along to her first Makeover Day in 2013 and loved the whole experience. In fact she loved it so much that she has just been along for her third visit.

Ann said “As someone who does not like shopping at all, its perfect for me. I find it fascinating as often the clothes suggested for me to try on are never the ones I would pick out for myself. When I am persuaded (sometimes reluctantly) to put them on I am always pleased with the new look me and the combinations that work for me and I would never have thought to put them together myself. I have always been really pleased with my purchases but never felt under any pressure to buy”.

The day offers a complete positive experience which includes hair styling, makeup, gelvarnish nails and clothes

styling. Ann said “This time my friend and I made sure we had somewhere nice to go out in the evening as we knew we would be looking good”. •

Ann

“I am always pleased with the new look me and the combinations that I would never have thought to put them together myself. I have always been really pleased with my purchases and never felt under any pressure to buy”.

We continue with our Dream On makeover stories

WATCH THE FILM HERE

Dream On was set up to help women be the best they can be. One of the services we offer is fashion and styling.

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If you would like to find out more about Makeover Days then please take a look on our website www.dream-on.co.uk, call our team on 01379 678483 or email info@dream-on.co.uk. We would love to hear from you.

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PAINTED FACES

ABOUT ME From a young age I have had a passion for recording the human form.

I thrive on being part of a lively community surrounded by eclectic characters. I find people, their stories and relationships fascinating, which is why I relish the challenge of capturing ones’ inner spirit as well as their physical embodiment.

I have over a decades’ experience teaching Art at Secondary School and tutoring life drawing within adult education. I have a wide contextual knowledge of art history and am able to reference this when finding creative solutions for my portraits.

I am formally trained; I graduated from Sheffield Hallam University with a First Class honours degree in Fine Art. I later followed this training with a PGCE Art teaching qualification from the University of Cambridge.

I currently live in Suffolk with my family. The studio in my garden is my sanctuary and I cherish every moment I am able to spend in there.

FEATURED ARTIST

Q&A with Suffolk Painter: Louise Gridley

Q&A When we were having a look at your work round the office, the words joyful and fun came up a lot... Is that something that comes naturally or is it a conscious thing?

Joy... hmm, that’s interesting!

That is the feeling I have when I am painting - immense joy.

Perhaps that comes through? I hope so! Yes, I guess a lot of my images are fun. I love humour and I like to make people smile.

There are so many fun moments in life that I wish I could pause.

Painting is a way of capturing those moments and bringing them back to life. Although the camera is first on the scene,

the photographic images lack the magic that a painting offers.

Replicating a moment in paint seems much more real and honest; it allows us a glimpse of the human spirit. Perhaps that’s why the images may be seen as joyful?

Whose work do you get inspired by?

There are so many artists that I am inspired by - and for different reasons. Whenever I see a new exhibition, there is always something I take away with me on some level. I recently saw Marlene Dumas at the Tate Modern which was such a treat as I admire her work greatly. In

fact, she has an amazing ability to capture the human spirit within her paintings. I love the work of Matisse who is an absolute genius at depicting the human form. Now his work you would definitely call joyful. I love his playful use of line, his vibrant use of colour and pattern and his bold use of shape with his silhouetted forms.

What first inspired you to pick up a brush?

I honestly can’t recall a ‘first time’ experience. Art has always been inside me. There was not one thing that set me off, it was just always ‘there’. From as young as I can remember, I spent>

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hours drawing and painting - it was always my passion. My mum (proudly, as mums do) tells me of the painting that won 1st prize in a competition. I was aged three, and she was amazed that I had painted a still life of a vase of flowers off my own back with no direction. She says she has the painting in the loft - I would love to see it some day!

Can we find you in any galleries in the region?

Not at present. I’m concentrating on building up a large body of work that I can exhibit.

So watch this space!

What are you working on at the moment?

I am currently working on images of childhood - both that of my own and my young daughters’. I have lots of pieces on the go at once! I get to a stage in my paintings where I am near completion but itching to move on to the next piece, so invariably I do! In many ways it’s great having several pieces of work on the go at one time as I can switch from one painting to another, depending on my mood. On the other hand, I end up with multiple pieces that all need finishing at the same time - I hate that stage!

What themes are you exploring or what direction are you going in this year?

I have been working alongside an amazing and dynamic group of OAPs in London called the ‘Geezers’. I have more work planned with them and their project ‘Where’s my Boozer Gone?’ which highlights the disappearance of local pubs. I also plan to do a series of pub portraits, which will celebrate the diverse characters that shape our communities. I will continue with my childhood images as the source material is rich, plentiful and universal.

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Can you briefly describe the process that goes into one of one of your pieces?

I work with acrylic paint but my approach to working on canvas and paper are very different. When working on canvas, it is more formulaic; I rough out a painting composition with a loose wash. I map out the main elements with my brush and will scrub out and reposition marks until I am happy with the arrangement. I then start to model tone, still with a wash. I will play with this until I have a reasonable likeness of the subject. I will then add colour, in layers of wash initially, followed by a thicker consistency of paint. When working on paper, I am a lot freer in my approach. I still start with wash, but go straight in with colour.

It is so fast drying that I can be more spontaneous! I love to play with the marks that are made during the process - it’s quite an

honest way of working. It’s great to leave behind evidence of the process - the layers, the brush marks, the drips that are made during the action of painting.

Sometimes I draw onto the surface of the paper with pastel also - especially if I want to reinforce a shape or contour.

If you could pick one person to paint a portrait for?

I should perhaps say someone really famous with an interesting face and an amazing story. The truth be told, I’d love to be able to paint a portrait of my dad.

He died when I was five. I have

tried to resurrect the memories I have of him in paint, but, like the memories, the images I paint are blurry. I feel that I am scratching at the surface of the paper trying to touch upon something more tangible but I have no means; there is nothing there.

an eraser! if I need to remove an area of paint, tidy an edge or indeed, soften an edge then I use this little stub! It is magic! I only have one like it and I heavily rely on it! I was only wondering today how much longer it might last, and what I might do without it! •

We often ask our featured artist to recommend a particular product or tool. What is it you cannot go without in the studio?

I have this stubby little brush - I say stubby, as it is literally a stub of the remains of a filbert paintbrush. It is no use whatsoever for painting, but I use it like

‘Art for all’ It is important to me that art can be accessible to everyone and appreciated by all sectors of society regardless of education, culture or class. Art should not exclusively be confined to the gallery environment, but instead be available for

FEATURED ARTIST

a wide and diverse audience to enjoy. I am soon to be launching a portrait painting service which will provide people with bespoke, creative, original quirky compositions.

I will offer a giclee print service in addition to the original, initial artwork whereby the image can be shared and enjoyed by multiple people. I will aim to work within the clients budget to find an affordable, creative outcome.

“I have tried to resurrect the memories I have of my dad in paint, but, like the memories, the images I paint are blurry. I feel that I am scratching at the surface of the paper trying to touch upon something more tangible but I have no means; there is nothing there.”

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ello there.

Now here’s a question. Are you a letter writer? For those under a certain age, a letter is a piece of paper or a notelet (do I have to explain what a notelet is? Ask an elderly aunt!) that someone writes on.

It is then placed in an envelope, a stamp is stuck on it and then put into a post box and sent to the recipient, yes, I am talking about ‘snail mail’!

I wonder sometimes what young people think those bright red boxes dotted around our towns, cities and villages are actually for (apart from casually leaning against whilst waiting for a mate!)

I know communicating via a computer or smart phone is so fast, consisting of typing rapidly on a key board or key pad and pushing a button, but you know, one gets to a certain age when one relishes receiving a letter (instead of a bill!) Its just having the time to write a proper letter (not to mention the stamp at the ready!)

Well this month I am looking for an address for Her Majesty the Queen. I know, yes, its Buckingham Palace, London (when she’s not at my favourite Royal residence, Sandringham, of course) I was lucky enough to be invited to represent BBC Radio Norfolk (along with the chose few, including our much loved and much missed Roy Waller) It was a great occasion (and the sandwiches weren’t bad either!)

Now then, where was I? Oh yes, writing to our beloved Monarch. Well the reason for writing is because of my parents. My dear “old folks” celebrate their Diamond Wedding Anniversary this month and my Mother would like the Queen to send her congratulations. Sixty

YLM | YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

LOVE LETTERS A tale of Stamps & Squash Balls

years of marriage is an astonishing achievement in my view.

I know how lucky I am to have both of my parents alive at my age (a little over 50, there, I’ve said it) My parents are both in their

eighties and despite a few medical conditions, they enjoy reasonably good health. The important thing is they have each other, and are looked after well in a care home not far from where I live.

COMMENT

“My Mother must have rather liked the look of the ‘old boy’ as she rather brazenly asked if he knew where she could buy a squash ball!”

It was a bit of a whirlwind romance by all accounts, back at the tail end of 1954. My parents were both working for a department store in Bournemouth.

Well one day, they found themselves in the store lift together.

My Mother must have rather liked the look of the ‘old boy’ as she rather brazenly asked if he knew where she could buy a squash ball! (not exactly Catherine Cookson, I grant you! but it did the trick!) My Father not only told her where she could buy such a ball, he asked if she would like a game sometime.

Well, how could she refuse?

The rest, as they say, is history.

Within six months they were married and even today my dear old Father has a twinkle in his eye (just for my Mother, you understand, although he seems to be quite a hit with the female care staff too!)

So there we have it; a milestone; sixty years of wedded bliss. You may ask, did I get the all important message of congratulations from Queen Elizabeth 11? Yes I did... but I had to go on the internet to get it! Happy Anniversary Ma and Pa. •

Words by Louise Priest Broadcast Journalist BBC Look East

MARCH 2015

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Merrick Hill Celebrate New Premises and a New Member of the Team

CARING FOR YOUR FUTURE

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CASE STUDY “I have been associated with Merrick Hill for over 30 years and throughout this time I have come to regard Gary and his team as friends rather than just another business contact. This is priceless when put to the test as was our recent example with the massive tidal surge that hit the East Coast and my business Lings of Lowestoft In December 2013, Gary was one of the first on the scene offering support, guidance, and practical advice on what we needed to do and was instrumental in making sure our action plan was maintained to get the full support through our insurers. I have always found the team at Merrick Hill to be the most professional company I have dealt with.”

— Paul Barkshire Lings Motor Group

YLM | YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

errick Hill insurance began broking in 1968 and are a well recognised, trusted and established company. Today they are part of Scrutton Bland Group, one of the largest independent providers of financial services in Norfolk, Suffolk and East Essex.

Being part of the group allows the company to pass on savings to their clients.

Merrick Hill take on accounts of a commercial nature, from commercial motor insurance to agricultural. The location of the company means that Merrick Hill naturallly have a number of clients on the agricultural side and can look after the whole concern from buildings and machinery to crops and livestock.

They are also the approved insurer for The British Free Range Egg Producers Association (BRFEPA) based on the provision of exclusive and tailored insurance agreements to all members.

It is this kind of personal and

tailored service that makes the company stand out.

We have been so used to seeing the Merrick Hill office in the centre of Diss that I’m sure some of you are wondering, where have they gone and why the change?... Gary explained, “our focus for the past few years has been business insurance and being accessible on the edge of town had become more important to us than being in the town centre.” But that’s not to suggest they don’t care about Diss. Had they considered leaving town? “No” was the emphatic answer. Being where they are matters, not just to them but also to their customers.

I had the pleasure of going to catch up with the Merrick Hill team in their new premises in Chancery House on Victoria Road (Now there is plenty of parking!) They describe the move as: “One small step for our clients and staff but a giant leap for our business.” And this really is the case; the move has allowed them to employ a new Account Executive, Howard Wright, and expand the business. Howard is excited about the opportunity to offer a “local, knowledge based service.” to new clients having made the move from Lowestoft.

VENTURE

PLAN Words by Wendy Aiken

“ It’s all about providing the best service that they can and building strong, long-lasting relationships.”

I ask if there is any right of passage for ‘newbie’s’ and there isn’t anything in particular planned apart from the usual ‘dress down Friday’ Upon entering the new office I received a warm welcome; they really are a great bunch of people. Many of the team have been at the company since the 90’s and it’s nice to know that you can deal with the same person every time you need to call for advice? - you can put a face to the name. I am told about how, when they go out to visit clients it’s all about providing the best service that they can and building strong, long-lasting relationships.

“People want us to work with them.” said Gary, “and we do that best by listening to them.”

Chatting with Gary made me realise what I already knew – talking matters. If you let them understand you, they’ll give you what you need.

The art of conversation is far from dead, well not at Merrick Hill at least! •

The Team (L to R): Gary Stannard – Director, Ed Nottingham – Director, Alison Wilby – Account Executive, Mark Wilby – Account Executive, Lisa Farrell – Account Handler, Howard Wright – Account Executive

Find Us Chancery House, Victoria Road, Diss

Email info@merrickhill.co.uk

Telephone 01379 643444

Visit our Website www.merrickhill.co.uk

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Q. I have read about the “Help to Buy” scheme and as a first time buyer, wonder if it might be suitable for me. How do I find out if I am eligible?

I A.

t has now been two years since the Government backed Help to Buy (HTB) scheme was introduced.

The scheme is aimed at assisting both first time buyers getting on to the property ladder, and individuals trapped in homes unsuited to their aspirations and needs.

About the Scheme The HTB scheme takes two forms. The first offers the opportunity to take an interest free loan for five years from the Government of up to 20% of the value of the property.

This part of the scheme is only available on new build properties. The second form sees the Government acting as a guarantor for some of a borrower’s debt under the mortgage guarantee scheme. Both forms of the scheme are available to all individuals who cannot afford the larger deposits required by lenders and allows buyers to have as little as a 5% deposit.

The scheme is purely taxpayer funded which allows it to be much more accessible, unlike other schemes which

“The major advantage of HTB is that you could be accepted for market leading mortgage rates at 25% deposit levels.”

£

LOOKING FOR A NEW HOME? £ Help to Buy Explained £

£

require significant developer contributions! Potential home owners can use the scheme to buy homes up to a maximum value of £600,000. The purchased property must be your main residence and you cannot own any other property. This therefore rules out the scheme being used on second homes and buy-to-let properties.

The Pros and Cons A major advantage for the HTB scheme in comparison to other schemes on the market is that better mortgage rates are available. On a 5% deposit alone, rates are likely to be high and tough to find, whereas with HTB you could be accepted

for market leading rates at 25% deposit levels.

The main restriction is that an independent valuer must assess the open market value of the property. This is then the minimum that the property can be sold for. If a lower offer is accepted, then the agent won’t release the charge they hold over the property. This is because the equity loan will rise in line with any increase in the value of your property. For example, if you purchase for £200,000 with an equity loan of £40,000 and you sell three years later for £210,000, the equity loan repayable will be £42,000.

The loan can, however, be

VENTURE

repaid in part or in full at any time or on the sale of the property. The minimum amount must be 10% of the current market value of the property.

This allows you to repay the loan at a time when you are more financially stable.

Although the loan is initially interest free, after five years it then becomes subject to a charge of 1.75%, a rate that will rise each year by the rate of inflation plus 1%, thus making early repayment more appealing.

It is important to note that properties may be advertised at four-fifths of the actual price under the scheme. Potential buyers should remember that they are paying the full purchase price for the property but obtaining a second loan to do so, which will start to accumulate interest after five years. Additionally, Stamp Duty is based on the full purchase price, not the discounted help to buy contribution price.

All in all the scheme provides a healthy option to those who perhaps already rent a property and have found it difficult to build up savings for the required deposit but are financially in a position to meet regular monthly mortgage repayments. •

Words by Anneka Daley Conveyancing Executive Steeles Law

Steeles Law is excited to announce that we will move to St Nicholas House, 3 St Nicholas Street, Diss in the spring.

Our offices are currently undergoing extensive refurbishment and a date for the move will be announced in the coming months.

We look forward to welcoming clients and business partners to our new, modern and accessible offices.

For more information Telephone 01379 652141 Visit our Website www.steeleslaw.co.uk

C VENTURE

hancellor George Osbourne surprised investors and savers in his March 2014 Budget, announcing the most far-reaching changes to the tax efficient ISA since its launch in 1999. The increase in annual allowance to £15,000 was a welcome, if overdue development and represented a sizeable increase in this taxsaving investment opportunity.

From April 6th this year, savers and investors will each be given a new annual ISA allowance of £15,240 which now applies to both cash and stocks and share holdings, and can be held in any combination of the two. This offers choice and flexibility in building an ISA portfolio that reflects differing and changing appetites to risk.

However, despite the increase in the amount of cash that can now be held in an ISA, cash deposits have offered dire returns over the last five years, meaning savers are facing the real danger of eroding their capital.

Barely half of the Cash ISAs on the market currently achieve a return that beats inflation* as the average Cash ISA is paying just 1.08%**, and this means that a basic rate tax payer depositing their full

“ A Stocks and Shares ISA can offer the potential for higher returns, although the full tax savings and investment benefits can only be achieved by investing for the medium to long term in assets offering the scope for attractive returns.”

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PROTECT YOUR EGG

wants to build an investment portfolio for retirement, to pay for school or university fees for children, to cover the cost of care for elderly relatives, or for other financial goals, the rule changes have added to the flexibility of ISAs and will further enhance their popularity among investors and savers.

The fundamental benefits of an ISA as a vehicle to create future wealth have received a significant boost from the changers, and has given a welcome opportunity for individuals to reconsider how they put aside money for a secure financial future. What hasn’t changed however, is that your allowance for the new tax year will be lost unless used, and this means taking action to ensure you don’t miss the opportunity. •

*Source: Bank of England, December 2014 ** Source: Moneyfacts, November 2014

Are your Cash ISAs suffering from record low interest rates?

allowance in cash would save tax of just £32.92, which is not what a saver may expect from the most tax advantaged home for their cash.

Depositing your ISA allowance in a savings account on which the returns fail to keep pace with inflation is a wasted opportunity. A Stocks and Shares ISA however, can offer the potential for higher returns, although the full

tax savings and investment benefits can only be achieved by investing for the medium to long term in assets offering the scope for attractive returns. It is important to seek financial advice to help you achieve tax efficient income and capital growth.

An ISA is one of the most tax efficient and potentially rewarding investments you can make. Whether an individual

*** The value of a Stocks and Shares ISA will be directly linked to the performance of the funds selected and may fall as well as rise. You may get back less than you invested. An investment in a Stocks and Shares ISA will not provide the same security of capital associated with a Cash ISA. The favourable tax treatment of ISAs may not be maintained in the future and is subject to changes in legislation.

Words by Samuel Duncan To receive a complimentary guide covering Wealth Management, Retirement Planning or Inheritance Tax Planning, contact Samuel Duncan of 6 St. Nicholas Street, Diss on 01379 641211 or email samuel.duncan@sjpp.co.uk

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YLM

hen I first considered apprenticeships, I was concerned that they were a form of cheap labour. Looking back I couldn’t have been further away from the truth.

Fortunately a persistent phone call from Callum at Learn Direct got me thinking differently. I don’t even know why I stayed on the call but I’m glad I did.

Leightens’ article last month was very hopeful about the future for young people and apprenticeships and I agree with his view.

Fast forward two years and our first apprenticeshice Esther is now a permanent member of the team. Helping to run some of our workshops with two NVQ qualifications, MBTI qualified and now training to be a coach, Esther also loves the style part of Dream On.

VENTURE

She has a role helping buy the clothes for our younger customers. (Amanda and I like to think of ourselves as trendy, but we do benefit from someone like Esther!) We’ve also trained her in colour and styling so that she can help on our makeover days.

So, as I’ve already mentioned, it started with a phone call from Callum. He arranged a meeting with Neil from Learn Direct where we explained what we do and how a role of an apprentice might work. As we talked, Neil was very clear what the experience and training we were planning would benefit.

We agreed a job advert and so the process of recruiting Esther began. The interview process was thorough, with a shortlist of three lovely girls. All three brought talents we could develop.

At Dream On, as we are a CIC (a social enterprise) and with our link to The Blossom Charity, we needed someone who could empathise with our aims. After tossing a coin (not true but as Esther is reading this it made me smile to write this!) we offered

the role to Esther Rose.

“The role has developed beyond We then decided which my expectations and I’m excited NVQ’s Esther would study for. about the future. At times it’s Nicky, a trainer from Learn a bit scary but I know I’ll be Direct, came in regularly to supported and encouraged.” discuss progress and to assess her performance. This is great, as on the job training is practical and tailored to Dream On. It’s become clear that Esther We have now decided to rehas the potential to help with cruit a new apprentice. It’s for a the courses and training we different role to Esther’s; helpoffer. So we had a chat and ing developing the transactional decided that Esther would have and selling side of our website. additional training that would So... my view of apprenticeprepare her to do this. At Dream ship has totally changed. FindOn, we offer the same coaching ing a place that offers good and development for our team training is important and can as we do to our clients. lead to a positive start to your “I love the way I’m consistcareer. ently learning new things.” said We asked Esther what she Esther. “The role has developed would say to anyone reading this beyond my expectations and article: “Apprenticeships work I’m excited about the future. At well, they did for me, I’ve gained times it’s a bit scary but I know qualifications, experience and a I’ll be supported and encourjob. If you’re thinking of an apaged.” prenticeship, look at the Dream Our aim was always that, as On website. If it looks like the Dream On grew, we could make kind of company you’d like to the role permanent and, in July be a part of, give me a ring at last year, we offered Esther a Dream On 01379 678483 or permanent role. Which fortuemail esther@dream-on.co.uk” nately she accepted.

•

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Apprenticeships Really Do Work

Words by Bridget McIntyre Dream On

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MARCH 2015

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WOMeN IN BUSINESS

Josie Allen Suffolk Surplus Nestled in the Suffolk countryside, near Stonham Aspal, Suffolk Surplus sells anything and everything from kitchenalia and collectables, to antiques, shabby chic furniture , items for the garden and even a super 1976 Volkswagen bay window camper van!

Come along and have a browse!

Corrinan Giles The Little Upholsterer The Little Upholsterer offers traditional upholstery services from the beautiful village of Peasenhall in East Suffolk. Corrina provides a range of services from small restoration work to larger projects using traditional techniques and materials. She has an open workshop and welcomes visitors to pop in and find out more about her work. Visit Corrina’s Facebook page to see her latest projects at The Little Upholsterer.

Charlotte Nicholls The Forge

They have supported the businesses on this page and would love you to do so too.

Open seven days a week, all year: April to Sept 10am to 5pm, October to March 10am to 4pm.

Nicki Porter Mrs. P Creative Nicki, aka Mrs P, is an experienced freelance graphic designer providing a range of services including branding , logos and promotional materials and communications for print and web, illustration and web site design.

Nicki enjoys working with clients on a one to one basis from project inception to final delivery.

For more information, 01379 678483 www.dream-on.co.uk

The Blossom Charity supports women in business through coaching and workshops in, for example, marketing yourself and your business, business budgeting and how to lead teams.

Whether you have just had a bracing stroll around the beautiful Thornham Walks or need a great place to meet up with friends or family, The Forge has a warm welcome. From delicious lunches with a nice glass of wine, to tea and cakes or light snacks.

SHOW YOUR COLOURS

#networking

DO YOU HAVE A GREAT BUSINESS THAT YOU NEED TO BE SEEN?... ...WE’LL HELP YOU DO IT Be part of a friendly and dynamic trusted business referral group

The accountant says; “It’s not all about the money!”

“For me being a part of this group is about getting to promote my business in front of 20 plus other like-minded business people and build some really important long term relationships. Yes the financial reward is good, but it’s so much more than that for me and my company.”

— Matthew Neale Haines Watts Chartered Accountants

Make a business shine “I joined the Diss group of business people in 2012 as my company was at a cross roads. A make or break situation.

Not only did 60% of my business come through the group in my first year that I joined, I work alone and so getting to meet up with other business owners every week is invaluable.

for more information 01379 642 044

wendyaiken@live.com

I am so glad I went for it!

— Roger Dukes Autobbession

YLM

CLASSIC

REASONING*

A

pril signals that the worst of the winter is behind us now and we can look forward to warm spring days and the promise of summer sun. Traditionally April is also the start of the classic car and motorcycle season - mothballed bikes and sleepy classics venture out for the first time following the winter hibernation. For me it’s an infinitely more interesting time than when the new vehicle registrations emerge in March and September - instead of spotting the new registrations on the road I’m looking out for the pottering Austin A35’s and listening for the distant howl of a motorcycle engine being given some stick.

So, classic cars - what would you drive this summer given the choice? I think it’s time for a game of fantasy classic car collection. The rules are simple: choose four cars you’d

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“Normal mode offers a balanced driving experience while you can also opt for an eco-friendly green set-up by pushing the switch one way or sport mode the other.”

Austin Healey 100/4 roadster

“You can charge the car at home overnight for pennies and there are an increasing amount of fast charging points at public car parks and workplaces now to help top up the batteries.”

*What would you drive this summer given the choice?

Citroen DS

MOTORING

“So often these days we see excessive styling concealing some fairly ordinary engineering. That is something you could never say of the Citroen DS”

like to have in your garage this summer. For me I’d like the list to be almost affordable and with a bit of variety - something for every mood and occasion. Here goes...

First, and in anticipation of sunny skies I’d choose an Austin Healey 100/4 roadster.

Now, this might be a little controversial, but to my eyes the big Healey is simply the best looking sports car from this island - bar none. Some will tell you that a Jaguar E Type should have that crown, but I disagree. The E Type is a fine looking car but the Healey is the more balanced design, and sitting so low to the ground with the windscreen raked position it just looks fast - exactly how a sports car should look.

Next up - Citroen DS. At its launch in 1955 the DS looked as if it had arrived from the future - a bold statement

How about something Italian? It is often said that everyone should own an Alfa at sometime in their lives, and for me the Alfa of the moment is the 1960’s boxy Giulia saloon. The car is perhaps best remembered as the chosen steed of the hapless Italian police chasing the Mini Coopers in The Italian Job. Good looking is something you might be stretched to say about the Giulia, but it does have one claim which appeals to me: despite its boxy looks it is actually more aerodynamic than

were famous for, but once again it’s the looks that do it for me. Styled by Pininfarina, it looks every bit as classy as the Ferraris and Maseratis of the period, but I like it simply because it doesn’t register on most people’s radar and therefore has a little exclusivity all of its own.

Ok, that’s mine, or should I say that’s mine today, because tomorrow it might be different - I’m thinking of a Renault 8 Gordini saloon or maybe Volvo 123 GT - decisions,decisions...

•

Alfa Romeo 1960’s Giulia saloon from Citroen that has become a design icon. But the beauty wasn’t just skin deep: never before had so many novel engineering approaches been brought together in one design. The legendary suspension was so good that Rolls-Royce adopted it for their Silver Shadow. So often these days we see excessive styling concealing some fairly ordinary engineering (what I would call ‘style over substance’), but that is something you could never say of the DS, and that is why it gets my vote.

the ‘faster’ looking coupe that is based on it! I like the idea of that, and coupled with its sporty engine & handling you have the potential to embarrass a few BMW drivers out there. Values are going up too, so get one whilst you can...

Lastly, how about a coupe?

I’m going Italian again this time and would choose a Lancia 2000 HF from the very early 1970’s. The 2000 HF was the final incarnation of the Lancia Flavia Coupe, carrying with it the unique engineering approach that Lancia

Words by Leighten Ball GM Autotech

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IT’S O.K. TO BE

NORMAL

When you’re a Renault Zoe

O

ne of the best comments that can be made about the Renault Zoe is that it is normal.

This could sound like it was being damned with faint praise, but since the concept behind the small Renault is far removed from most cars, that normality is quite an achievement.

The reason for this is that the Zoe is a purely electric car with no hint of an internal combustion engine in sight.

You get very little sign of that from the outside though.

The stylish design sits nicely with Renault’s current strong identity, with only the merest hint of blue about the exterior to give the game away.

The cabin runs along similar lines with a compact, digital, set of driver’s instruments and a navigation and entertainment system very similar to that found on the larger Clio.

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Likewise, there is a conventional handbrake, automatic gearstick, electric window switches, heating controls and cubby holes. There is also comfortable seating inside for four adults and the boot will deal with a week’s food shopping easily.

It is only when you start the car that the experience begins to get a little different.

Push the start button and nothing happens – or that’s what it seems. There is no thrum or clatter from beneath the bonnet to let you know everything is good to go, just a small change in the instrument’s graphics to signal the car’s readiness.

Put the engine into drive and pull away and, for those who haven’t driven an electric car, it will all seem slightly eerie. There is very little noise – just a faint whirring from up front – and you’re off.

There is also the potential for surprise since an electric motor has all of its torque available instantly.

Push the accelerator and 162

lb ft is pulling the car at quite a spritely pace, helped by the 88hp available in normal mode.

The performance, which sees the 0-62mph time completed in 13.5 seconds, is all the more impressive considering everything is set-up to maximise the batteries’ range.

I mentioned a normal horsepower figure because there is also an eco mode which dips the power a little to make even more of the batteries’ energy.

The instantaneous pull when you prod your right foot makes the Zoe feel faster than it is – which is often the sign of a good, small and lightweight car.

That is continued by the driving experience which is tailored, not unexpectedly, for urban driving.

Light steering and plenty of visibility make manoeuvres around town a doddle and the suspension is comfortable enough to deal with the rough surfaces so often found in car parks and the like.

The brakes are the one bit that

“Normal mode offers a balanced driving experience while you can also opt for an eco-friendly green set-up by pushing the switch one way or sport mode the other.”

“You can charge the car at home overnight for pennies and there are an increasing amount of fast charging points at public car parks and workplaces now to help top up the batteries.” will take some getting used to because they serve more than one purpose.

Obviously they slow you down, but the Zoe will also regenerate electricity under braking, making the bite sharper than one would expect.

This means a slight change in driving style is required, with the idea being that you lift off early, using the engine’s natural resistance to slow you down and top the batteries up, before using the brakes if you need to.

In fact, it becomes quite an enjoyable challenge, trying to improve upon the car’s predicted range by driving economically.

And here we come to the crux of the matter – the distance an

MOTORING

electric car can travel before refuelling.

Renault is quite up front about this which is refreshing and, although the quoted range is 130 miles, it says that you are more likely to actually do 100 miles in real world conditions and temperatures. You will find that in cold winter weather that will be slightly less still as the batteries don’t like chilly conditions.

Still, a good many journeys are less than even 40 miles one way, be it the school run, supermarket shop or popping round to see friends or family, so an extremely conservative 80

Ford Fiesta for around £10,000.

Frugal though a Fiesta is, it cannot compete with the Zoe in the fuel economy stakes though, especially as not only are there no petrol station bills, but there is also no road fund licence cost as the Renault emits zero emissions.

You would struggle to own a Zoe as your only car because the major benefit of a petrol or diesel is that there is an extensive refuelling network, taking only a minute or so to add hundreds of miles to your range, rather than hours to travel only another 100 miles.

mile round trip isn’t particularly limiting.

Try to keep the Zoe off motorways and dual carriageways, where the higher speeds and lack of regenerative braking drains the batteries quickly, and the Renault will perform dutifully and efficiently.

You can charge the car at home overnight for pennies and there are an increasing amount of fast charging points at public car parks and workplaces now to help top up the batteries.

It does cost quite a lot to start with at around £14,000 in a model where you lease the batteries. These get replaced when they drop below 75 per cent efficiency and you pay a set amount per month without the hassle or cost of replacing or disposing of them.

This price is after a government grant too, and to be honest, you can buy a similarly sized

However, if you own a larger and conventionally powered car for those times when you need to travel a longer distance with more of a load, a second car in the shape of the Zoe could make a lot of sense. It’s fun to drive, looks good, is incredibly cheap to run and behaves, well . . . normally.

In short, Renault has done an excellent job of making an allelectric car an attractive proposition to own and run. •

Words by Chris Lilly

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ENCHANTED FOREST: AN INKY QUEST AND COLOURING BOOK

by Johanna Basford £9.95

THE WELL

by Catherine Chanter £12.99

A stunningly beautiful book especially for grown ups to colour in. Johanna Basford’s earlier work ‘Secret Garden: An Inky Treasure Hunt and Colouring Book’ has been a real hit and ‘Enchanted Forest’ looks to follow in its footsteps with more gorgeous designs. This book is perfect for a nice calm evening in!

Reviews by Diss Publishing 01379 644612 www.disspublishing.co.uk

BOOK CLUB

While the rest of Britain is devastated by drought, rain continues to fall at The Well and Ruth is unable to explain why they are unaffected. Slowly tensions between her family and the outside world grow and Ruth’s paradise gradually turns into a nightmare as she struggles to know who to trust. An incredible dystopian thriller that’s impossible to put down from the first page to the unforgettable ending.

AUTHOR A DOWN TO EARTH GUIDE TO THE COSMOS

by Mark Thompson £8.99 Mark Thompson traces the origins of the Universe and provides a series of monthly sky guides to focus on the astronomical highlights during the year.

Fascinating and accessible ‘A Down to Earth Guide to the Cosmos’ is a must for anyone who wants to know more about the sky above.

Tickets £5 A 10% discount on tickets is available with the redemption of this page

Thompson currently stars on BBC Stargazing Live.

He is also a regular on Radio 5 Live.

Mark will be visiting Diss Publishing Bookshop for a special event on April 9th. The event starts at 7pm with a drink and nibbles. Tickets are £5 and redeemable against the price of the book. Purchase tickets early to avoid disappointment, Mark’s wealth of knowledge and enthusiasm make this an unmissable event for all astronomy fans in the family.

LOOK WHO’S BACK

by Timur Vermes £8.99

PUGLIA

by Tara Russell £24.95 Hailed as the new Tuscany, Puglia’s cuisine is described as Italy’s best-kept secret. This book reveals plenty of authentic recipes from both Puglia and the neighbouring Basilicata region, with each chapter exploring the highlights of a province from local food traditions to classic wines and speciality shops. With lots of unique mouthwatering recipes, this is an essential stop on a culinary tour of Italy.

Berlin 2011 and Adolf Hitler wakes up alive and well.

He quickly realises that things have changed – no Eva, no Nazi party and no war. In fact he barely recognises his own country that is filled with immigrants and run by a woman! He becomes a viral hit on You Tube and eventually gets his own TV show and people begin to listen – his aim: to sort Germany out. This book was a huge hit in Germany and enthralled readers with its treatment of a taboo subject. It is funny and scary but a tale for our current times.

Est. 1925

BOOKSHOP & CAFE, GIFTS & ARTS EASTER COMPETITION Write an Easter Poem, bring it to the shop and enter our Easter Egg draw

UPCOMING EVENTS April 9th 7pm - Mark Thompson, ‘Guide to the Cosmos’ evening event April 11th 10 – 12pm - James Campbell, ‘Boyface’ book series signing April 18th 10 – 12pm – Mary and Colin Nelson ‘Nostalgic Memories of Jason Partner’ signing

❤ YOUR LOCAL BOOKSHOP 58

Great new ranGe of smart-casual sprinG/summer wear

Accessories 路 FootweAr 路 FormAl Hire What more could you need?

01449 710001 Stonham Barns Retail Village, Stonham Aspal, IP14 6AT Open 7 days 10 - 4. Later by appointment Plenty of FREE parking

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WIN a Peter Andre break at Potters Resort Potters Resort on the Norfolk coast is hosting a One Night Special featuring an appearance from Peter Andre on Sunday 19th April 2015.

As well as being a much-loved presenter and reality TV star, the singer is best known for hit songs including ‘Mysterious Girl’ and ‘Flava’.

The break also includes comfortable accommodation, delicious five course dinner with selected wines, midnight dish, late night entertainment, breakfast the following morning, and use of the extensive sports and leisure facilities, including swimming pools and gym.

COMPETITION TIME

One lucky reader will win a one night break for two people on Sunday 19th April 2015.

To enter, simply answer the question below: Which of these is a Peter Andre song that has sold over a million copies in the UK? a) Body shaking b) Mysterious Girl c) King Enter via email to competitions@ylm.co.uk using the subject line ‘PETERWIN’ Please be aware that entries will be automatically added to our mailing list. Use the word ‘PETERWIN-N’ if you do not wish to be contacted in the future.Further T&Cs apply.*

+

SAV PE R

E £2

PE R

YLM has an exclusive reader offer when booking a Peter Andre One Night Special. Simply quote ‘YLM’ when booking to save £25 per person, making this inclusive break from just £109 per person.* *

S ON

5

Call Potters Resort’s Reservation Team on 0333 3207 438 to book

**T&C’s. Valid on new bookings only

and not to be used in conjunction with any other offer. Subject to promotional rate availability. Based on Bungalow accommodation, supplements apply.

For information on this or any other break at Potters Resort, please call the friendly Reservations Team on 0333 3207 438 or visit, www.pottersholidays.com

* T&C’s Competition entries must be received by Thursday 9th April 2015. You must include your name, address and telephone number. Entries after this date will be accepted but not entered into the prize draw. Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer. This prize is non exchangeable. The winner will be picked at random out of a hat, the judge’s decision will be final. The vendor reserves the right to suspend, cancel or modify the terms of the competition at any time without notice. Potters Resort will contact the winner by email.

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WHAT’S ON APRIL

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FRIDAY 3RD QUIZ NIGHT Join us at the farm for our great quiz night! With our quiz master, Rory Marriott. Paired with a delicious menu, a full bar and great prizes. 2 Course Meal £15 Jimmy’s Farm, Ipswich | 7:15pm | £15 | 01473 604206 / www.jimmysfarm.com

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GOOD FRIDAY SPECIAL - KARAOKE WITH MARK & LIAM Come along and sing your heart out!

Apollo Club, Harleston | 8pm - Midnight | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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EVENING INN & EASTER PARADE Local ale on tap, our ‘cocktail of the month’ & bacon butties. Children's Chick Hunt & Easter Bonnet parade with prizes, get working on those hats! Kids club available with Easter themed crafts & film.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 6.30pm – 11.30pm | Kids Club £5 Booking essential | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org. uk / admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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FRIDAY 3RD - MONDAY 6TH EASTER ADVENTURE QUEST You'll meet characters from the past with stories of times gone by - maybe a king, butler, Roman centurion or even a monk.

These honourable folk will be happy to help you on your quest as you explore Framlingham Castle and crack the clues. Rise to the challenge and win your chocolate reward.

Framlingham Castle, Suffolk | 11am-5pm | 01728 724922 /www.english-heritage.org.uk

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SUNDAY 5TH THE SILVER DOLLAR COUNTRY MUSIC CLUB, THE PARK HOTEL, DISS PRESENTS THE BUDGIE COLEMAN BAND The Park Hotel, Diss | Doors 7pm, Music 7.30pm - 10.30pm | Members £5, NonMembers £6 | John and Teresa Stannard 01603 433918

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MONDAY 6TH - EASTER MONDAY DUMPLIN COUNTRY, WRENINGHAM VILLAGE HALL, MILL LANE, WRENINGHAM PRESENTS JEFF GALLANT (SOLO).

Wreningham Village Hall | Doors 1pm, Music 1.30pm - 4.30pm | £5 | Licensed bar, tea, coffee and light refreshments | John and Teresa Stannard 01603 433918.

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MONDAY 6TH - SATURDAY 25TH ART: JONATHAN GIBBS WOOD ENGRAVINGS – LIFE IS BUT A DREAM An exhibition in Diss Corn Hall Gallery Evening viewing 8th April 6-7.45pm Diss Corn Hall | Box Office Hours | Free | 01379 652241 www.disscornhall. co.uk

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TUESDAY 7TH SCREEN ARTS: THE RISE AND FALL OF THE CITY OF MAHAGONNY Royal Opera House • Encore Screening Diss Corn Hall | 7:15pm | Tickets £15 / Under

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18s £12.50 | 01379 652241 www. disscornhall.co.uk CASH PRIZE BINGO All welcome - Just come along. Cash Prizes.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | Bar open from 6.30pm, eyes down at 7pm | £7 for 10 games | 01379 676660 / www. pennoyers.org.uk / admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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TUESDAY 7TH - SATURDAY 11TH THE SECRET ADVERSARY Agatha Christie's gripping thriller follows the daring and dizzying adventures of Tommy & Tuppence through 1920s London.

New Wolsey Theatre, Ipswich | 01473 295900 / www.wolseytheatre.co.uk

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WEDNESDAY 8TH FILM: MAPS TO THE STARS (18) This exposure of Hollywood is about as scathing as it can get. It’s ‘a tale of terminal Tinseltown wastrels with the twisted structure of a Greek tragedy.’

The Cut, Halesworth | £5 | 7:30pm| 01986 873285 / info@newcut.org/www. newcut.org

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FRIDAY 10TH CHARITY CLAIRVOYANT EVENING WITH 'ALEX LOVELOCK' All proceeds for St. Nicholas Hospice.

Apollo Rooms, Harleston | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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THEATRE:THE ELEPHANT MAN Quayside Dramatic Society Diss Corn Hall | 7:30pm | Tickets £10 / Concs £9 | 01379 652241 www. disscornhall.co.uk

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 10:30am - 3pm | Free Entry | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk PATTI RUSSO Best known as Meat Loaf's Girl Friday in the magnificent Paradise by the Dashboard Light, Patti Russo has performed alongside some of the world’s finest artists including Queen, Roger Daltrey, Jeff Beck, and Cher.

The Apex, Bury St Edmunds | 8pm | £20 | 01284 758000 / www.theapex.co.uk

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SUNDAY 12TH CLASSIC VEHICLE ROAD RUN The Halesworth to Snape Maltings Classic Vehicle Road Run will arrive at Snape Maltings at around 11.45am and will be with us until about 4.00pm.

Snape Maltings, Near Aldeburgh | 01728 688303 / www.snapemaltings.co.uk

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APOLLO COUNTRY MUSIC CLUB PRESENTS 'STEVE CHERELLE' Enjoy a great night of country music with this very popular & talented solo singer.

Bar, hot meals & raffle available.

Apollo Club, Harleston | 7.30pm - 10.45pm | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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MONDAY 13TH JOHNNY DOWD “Johnny Dowd is like some self-mutating virus of American music, restlessly bringing fresh twists to old forms, absorbing influences.” - The Independent (London) The Bank, Eye, Suffolk | Tickets £10, £8 | 7.15pm/8pm | 01379 873495 / www. thebankeye.org

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HITS FROM THE BLITZ Come and enjoy this unique feel-good 1940s show, as featured at Dame Vera Lynn’s Charity Gala Nights.

Theatre Royal Bury St Edmunds | Box Office 01284 769505 / www.theatreroyal.org / booking@theatreroyal.org

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SATURDAY 11TH THE POISONERS PACT Flour, Water, Arsenic... Set in the 1830s in the supposedly peaceful village of Burnham Market in North Norfolk. Catherine Frary & Frances Billings, the last women to be hanged in Norfolk & whose execution was the last public, double execution in England, found guilty of several murders by administering arsenic to their hapless victims.

The Cut, Halesworth | Std £10, Conc £9, Students £6 | 7:30pm| 01986 873285 / info@newcut.org/www.newcut.org

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JAZZ BREAKFAST Come and enjoy a leisurely weekend breakfast with the soothing sound of live Jazz in the background.

Jimmy’s Farm, Ipswich | 9.30am-11am | 01473 604206 / www.jimmysfarm.com

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SPRING CRAFT FAIR Local craft stalls including cards, sewing, jewellery and ceramics. Cafe open.

PENNOYER’S LUNCH CLUB To celebrate Easter we will be serving a 2-course full Roast Turkey lunch with all the trimmings.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 12:30 | £9.50 booking essential | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk

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TUESDAY 14TH 3D CROCHET WITH FELTING AT THE WORKHOUSE, HARLESTON Learn to crochet a 3D bowl & reveal a whole new way to work with wool when your bowl is felted! Light refreshments included.

The Workhouse, 5 Old Market Place, Harleston, Norfolk, IP20 9BE | £55.00 | 10am - 3pm | 01379 853668 / info@theworkhouse.co.uk / www.the-workhouse. co.uk

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TUESDAY 14TH - SATURDAY 18TH MACBETH Tara Arts brings Indian movement and live music to Shakespeare’s classic text, offering a powerful contemporary take on his darkest play.

Theatre Royal Bury St Edmunds | Box Office 01284 769505 / www.theatreroyal.org / booking@theatreroyal.org

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TUESDAY 14TH - SATURDAY 18TH THE GREAT GATSBY You are invited to the most glamorous party in town. In a sell-out run at Sad-

ler’s Wells, Northern Ballet’s The Great Gatsby is back by popular demand.

Theatre Royal, Norwich | 01603 63 00 00 / www.theatreroyalnorwich.co.uk / boxoffice@theatreroyalnorwich.co.uk

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THURSDAY 16TH NATIONAL THEATRE LIVE PRESENTS: THE HARD PROBLEM Hilary, a young psychology researcher at a brainscience institute, is nursing a private sorrow and a troubling question at work, where psychology and biology meet.

The Fisher Theatre, Bungay, Suffolk | 7pm | £12 | Box Office: 01986 897130 / www. fishertheatre.org

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FRIDAY 17TH EDITH CAVELL FACING THE SILENCE 1915, English nurse Edith Cavell has been captured by the Germans and condemned to death and is facing seventy days of silence before her execution. Yet out of the silence, Edith reconstructs her previous world of Edwardian certainties, family love, favourite people and songs.

The Cut, Halesworth | £10 | 7:30pm| 01986 873285 / info@newcut.org/www. newcut.org

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GERRY CROSS THE MERSEY An Evening with Gerry and the Pacemakers. Join us for this musical journey through the life and times of one of our greatest 60s icons – Gerry Marsden. Hear all Gerry’s greatest hits mixed with stories, jokes and anecdotes from his years at the top.

The Apex, Bury St Edmunds | 7.30pm | £19.50 | 01284 758000 / www.theapex. co.uk

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SATURDAY 18TH TONY'S CHARITY DANCE WITH 'KEVIN BARRY' A great night of music and dancing. Bar, hot meals and raffle available.

Apollo Rooms, Harleston | Tickets £5 from Tony | 7pm - Midnight | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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WATCH - NEW NORFOLK RESERVE, TAVERHAM MILL FISHERY Come and explore one of Norfolk’s newest nature reserves. Simon Wrigglesworth will lead us on a guided walk of Taverham Mill and reveal some exciting plans they have to help Norfolk’s wildlife.

Norfolk Wildlife Trust. Costessey Lane, Taverham, Norfolk, NR8 6TA | 10.30am12.30pm | Watch members: £4, nonmembers £6 (1 accompanying adult free) | 01603 625540

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THE PASADENA ROOF ORCHESTRA Since 1969 the Pasadena Roof Orchestra has been faithfully re-creating the glories of popular music from the 1920’s & 1930’s.

The fun-packed show features timeless classics from the great American song book New Wolsey Theatre, Ipswich | 01473 295900 / www.wolseytheatre.co.uk

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EVENTS

A SELECTION OF FORTHCOMING EVENTS IN OUR REGION

THE SATURDAY CLUB: SHOE KANGAROO AND THE BIG BAD BOOT By the Garlic Theatre Diss Corn Hall | 2pm | £5 / £3 (4+ yrs) | 01379 652241 www.disscornhall.co.uk

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SUNDAY 19TH THE SILVER DOLLAR COUNTRY MUSIC CLUB, THE PARK HOTEL, DISS PRESENTS DARREN BUSBY The Park Hotel, Diss | Doors 7pm, Music 7.30pm - 10.30pm | Members £5, NonMembers £6 | John and Teresa Stannard 01603 433918.

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TUESDAY 21ST APRIL ‘GET TWEETING’ - TWITTER COURSE FOR BEGINNERS. Heard about Twitter but don’t know how?

This practical workshop is run by social media specialist, Social Monkey who will get you “up and running” on this social media platform. Supported by Comic Relief.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 10am - 1pm | £10 per head / £7.50 Conc | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk / admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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WEDNESDAY 22ND NATIONAL THEATRE LIVE (ENCORE) PRESENTS: A VIEW FROM THE BRIDGE The great Arthur Miller confronts the American dream in this dark and passionate tale, starring Mark Strong.

The Fisher Theatre, Bungay, Suffolk | 7pm | £12 | Box Office: 01986 897130 / www. fishertheatre.org

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FRIDAY 24TH SCREEN ARTS: HAMLET Starring Maxine Peake at the Manchester Royal Exchange - Live Screening Diss Corn Hall | 2pm | Tickets £12 / Under 18s £10 | 01379 652241 www. disscornhall.co.uk

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BISTRO NIGHT Enjoy a delicious home-cooked meal – main course starting from £9.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | Bar opens at 6.45pm for 7.30pm | £9 booking essential | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk / admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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SATURDAY 25TH MUSIC: CLASSIC CLAPTON - 30TH ANNIVERSARY TOUR Diss Corn Hall | 7.30pm | Tickets £15 | 01379 652241 www.disscornhall. co.uk

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SADIE JEMMETT Extraordinary songs reflect a remarkable life - Behind the entrancing, eloquence of her lyrics and the subtle acoustic beauty of her music lies a restlessly seeking spirit and a rich but frequently dark experience.

The Bank, Eye, Suffolk | Tickets £6, £8 Adv | 7.15pm/8pm | 01379 873495 / www. thebankeye.org

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SUNDAY 26TH

COOKING WITH SPICES Mena Boughey, a local Indian cook with over 30 years home cooking experience will talk you through the very best fresh ingredients to use in curry creations.

Lavenham Village Hall, Lavenham, Church St, CO10 9QT | £25 | www.suffolkmarketevents.co.uk

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APOLLO COUNTRY MUSIC CLUB PRESENTS 'MUDDY BOOTS DUO' Another great night with a fantastic duo who will keep you on the dance floor all night long! Bar, hot meals & raffle available.

Apollo Rooms, Harleston | 7.30pm-10.45pm | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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MONDAY 27TH SHOPPING DAY IN AID OF CANCER RESEARCH UK Over 20 Stalls - Hot Footed ladies quality shoes & sandals, 3 collections of ladies clothes for all ages, jewellery, accessories, linens, gifts, plants and much more.

Lavenham Village Hall, Church Street, Lavenham, CO10 9QT | 10am - 3pm | £3 Entrance to Cancer Research UK (£2 after 1pm) | Tea/coffee & light lunches available.

DEAR LUPIN Father & son James Fox & Jack Fox star in this brand new stage adaptation of the best-selling Sunday Times Humour Book of the Year ‘Dear Lupin, Letters to a Wayward Son’ in which renowned journalist & author Roger Mortimer’s brilliantly hilarious & always generous letters to his unruly son Charlie are now vividly brought to life.

Theatre Royal, Norwich | 01603 63 00 00 / www.theatreroyalnorwich.co.uk / boxoffice@theatreroyalnorwich.co.uk

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WEDNESDAY 29TH DISS FLOWER CLUB - "SPRING FEVER" DEMONSTRATION BY ALAN SMITH Visitors welcome.

Roydon Village Hall | 7:30pm | £4 |

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THURSDAY 30TH SEX IN SUBURBIA Claire Sweeney stars in this new comedy about dating, men & finding Mr Right.

Theatre Royal Bury St Edmunds | Box Office 01284 769505 / www.theatreroyal.org / booking@theatreroyal.org

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market town of Beccles. Good locally produced food and local shops open.

Town Centre, Beccles, Suffolk NR34 9HA | Free entry | 8am-4.30pm | Kate Lee 01502 711174 / www.facebook.com/antiquesmarketbeccles

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SUNDAY 3RD MAY BUNGAY CLASSIC VEHICLE RALLY & COUNTRY FAYRE 2015 Bungay Area Lions Club is holding another fayre for Classic cars, motorcycles, tractors and both commercial and military vehicles. Other attractions will include food & craft stalls, licensed bar, trade stands, auto jumble, children's games, entertainers & workshops. Funds raised from the event will go to local Lions causes.

Earsham Hall, Bungay, NR35 2AN | 10am 5pm | £3 for adults - under 16s free | To show a vehicle: Michael Gardiner 07599 935113 Email: michaelegardiner@hotmail. com - registration form: www.lions105ea. com/lionsclubs/Bungay/downloads/ClassicCarForm_2015.pdf | For a stall: David Lewis 07599 935165 Email: dlewis@dlxml. com / Website: www.bungaylions.org.uk

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MONTHLY EVERY MONDAY

ODD BALLS KNITTING CLUB Just bring along your needles and ‘knit & natter’.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 1pm – 3pm | Free | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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MONDAYS & SATURDAYS PC HELP CLUB One-to-one PC help from keen and knowledgeable volunteers. All abilities welcome.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | Mondays 1.30pm – 5.30pm, Saturdays 9.30am – 12 noon | £4 for a one hour session | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers.org.uk admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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EVERY TUESDAY TUESDAY TIME TOGETHER Come along for a chat, fellowship, refreshments or quiet space.

St John’s Church, Harleston | 10.00am4.00pm | Free | 01379 851148

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JOHNNY CASH REVISITED A semi-biographical show illustrating the transition of Johnny Cash from being a young gospel singer from Dyess Arkansas, into the legendary recording artist known as The Man in Black.

The Fisher Theatre, Bungay, Suffolk | 7:30pm | £16, Conc £15 | Box Office: 01986 897130 / www.fishertheatre.org

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FIRST & THIRD TUESDAY DISS & DISTRICT CAMERA CLUB Grasmere Club, Denmark Street, Diss | 7:30pm-9:45pm | www.disscamera.org.uk

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FIRST TUESDAY WAVENEY BEREAVEMENT GROUP Number 7 - Prayer & Counselling Centre, 7-8 Mere Street, Diss | 2pm | 01379 658956

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NEXT MONTH SUNDAY 3RD MAY BECCLES ANTIQUES STREET MARKET 100 stalls selling a variety of antiques and collectables in the historical busy

THIRD TUESDAY BUSKERS NIGHT A relaxed evening with all types of music including modern, blues and folk. Bring along your instrument & speak to Dave

when you arrive. Bar with real ale & bacon butties.

Pennoyer Centre, Pulham St. Mary | 7pm | Free | 01379 676660 / www.pennoyers. org.uk / admin@pennoyers.org.uk

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FIRST THURSDAY DISS COMPUTER CLUB The Residents’ Meeting Room, Taylor Road | 7.00pm - 10.00pm | Bob Morgan 01379 650977 / disscomputerclub@gmail.com

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FIRST FRIDAY & THIRD SUNDAY AFRICAN DJEMBE DRUMMING LESSONS ‘Backspace’, Angel Cafe, Fair Green, Diss | Friday: 10 - 12pm & Sunday: 3 - 5pm | £12 per session | Jane 01379 641233

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THE WYKEN VINEYARD FARMERS MARKET The Wyken Farmers’ Market is about farmers, producers, bakers, makers, friends and family.

Wyken Road, Stanton, Bury St Edmunds | 9am - Noon | 01359 250262

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EVERY SATURDAY STRICTLY SATURDAYS Dump the shopping and come dancing at The Apex in the upstairs bar! Ballroom, Latin and Rock & Roll.

The Apex, Bury St. Edmunds | 2.30pm4.30pm | Free | 01284 758000 / enquiries@theapex.co.uk

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FIRST SATURDAY INDOOR FLEA MARKET Vintage, antique, collectables, etc.

Swan Hotel, Harleston | 9.00 - 1.00pm | Stalls £10 | 01379 855486

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EVERY SUNDAY STONHAM BARNS CAR BOOT SALE Stonham Barns, Pettaugh Road, Stonham Aspal | 8am for Sellers / 9am for Buyers | Simon Tilley 07817 539168

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SECOND & FOURTH SATURDAY BINGO FOR CASH PRIZES £6 for 6 games. All monies paid in is paid out in cash prizes!

Apollo Social Club, Harleston | £6 for 6 games | 8.00pm | 01379 854205 / www. apollo-club.co.uk

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SECOND & FOURTH SUNDAY COME DANCING If you love to dance this is a great night!

Professional DJ, fantastic dance floor & fully licensed bar.

Apollo Rooms, Harleston | 7pm-10pm | £5 | 01379 854205 / www.apollo-club.co.uk

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Disclaimer: Whilst every effort has been made to make this listing as accurate as possible, we recommend that you verify times and dates prior to attending any events.

Entries for May by 15th April via info@ylm.co.uk

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STORIES

The Dining Room

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Words by Geir Madland

he genteel clink of fine bone china, the soft hubbub of polite conversation, and a tinkling piano were not habitual features of Dean’s world.

Dean fair crashed into the dining room, swerving past the waitress’ trolley with two fingers in the air, indicating either numbers or disdain; still barking abrupt instructions into his mobile at a volume that probably rendered it an unnecessary appendage, he headed straight for the table in the far window without a sideways glance, and threw a heavy jacket over the back of one chair, while flopping weightily down on another.

Phone still wedged at his bristled cheek, he reached for the printed menu with his left hand, exposing a hefty gold Rolex, and smartly clicked the raised fingers of his right.

Not met with the instant apparition of the waitress, Dean finally deigned to grace the room with a look from behind his RayBans, his upper lip curling as his eyebrow rose and, catching the impassive eye of the waitress, beckoned her over with no more than an upward flick of his thrusting jaw.

As the waitress made her unhurried way across the Axminster, a brown shadow followed her, only to reveal itself, as they reached the table, to be the slightly stooping figure of a woman, clutching a large handbag as if to shield her blinking eyes from the light that bounced off Dean’s gilded chest, and hastily taking the seat opposite. Avoiding his shaded scowl beneath her

mousey fringe, she mumbled something apologetic, neither to him nor to the waitress but towards her tweed-skirted lap. Pearl shifted her modest bottom on the upholstery, and tucked away her brogues between the legs of the chair that seemed too big for her, like a nervous patient in the dentist’s waiting room. She finally raised her small chin to face her fellow diner, her fawnframed pupils wide as a deer’s facing a hunter.

They were as mismatched a couple as any the waitress had seen, and her thoughts were of scorn and sympathy, but she and the other lunchtime diners who feigned disinterest from behind their starched linen, were in for a surprise, as the previously restrained pianist now fingered a dramatic crescendo.

Casting aside the sunglasses, the man fixed his eyes on the woman’s. He rose to his full height and strode boldly around the table, his nostrils flaring as he lowered his black-curled head towards her. She looked up, shrinking back a little into the shelter of the chair, a trembling hand outstretched.

The music soared, the diners stared open-mouthed, and the waitress let her notepad fall to the floor, all unheeded as, tall and proud, he reached for the pocket of his jacket, like a matador switching his cape, and, bending a leather-bound knee to the floor, grasped her pale hand in his, flourishing a flawless diamond onto her dainty finger.

“Ooh, how lovely,” sighed the old girl at the next table, wiping an oily tear on her napkin. “Just like at the pictures.” •

&