CHATTER CHATTER CHATTER issuedecember
14
2014
editor, design - jacob sanders @jacobsandersar t
RR
contributors annie seo annieseo.com @fannieseo cover juliayellow.com julia yellow @_juliayellow p4-5 drew blomquist @quistago p6-10 anthropomorphicrud.tumblr.com john starr p11 kevin speidell p12-13
heyjohnstarr.com @johnstarrrr kevins-art.com @kevinspeidell
jacob sanders p14
jacobsandersart.com @jacobsandersart
writing director - jason melton @captainjmoses
Julia Yellow
EXT.- A CUL DE SAC IN A MIDWEST SUBDIVISION,
ED
AFTERNOON.
Gotta keep everything looking
JOAN and BILL, a married couple in their fifties, are raking
sharp. Plus, who am I kidding, I
leaves in their front yard. ED, their older neighbor in his
love to mow. Helps me relax.
seventies, sits on an idling ride-on lawn mower in the
JOAN
grassed center of the cul de sac. He is wearing very large,
Sure, sure. Hey, did we tell you
wrap-around sunglasses. They all chat.
we’re building a new all-season
JOAN Thanks for keeping that grass mowed, Ed!
porch on the back of our house? BILL Yep, remember when I told you about
JOAN stops to lean on her rake as she chats. BILL continues
some new improvements? We’re gonna
raking as he chats. He rakes with small, purposeful motions.
knock the back wall out of the den,
BILL Yeah, we’re still trying to keep up
6
with these darn leaves!
build an extension jutting out into the south end of the lawn.
ED
That’s great. Do some good bird watching in there.
house with an abundance of leaves on its front lawn. There is a sign posted
BILL
that reads: “FOR SALE. PRICE REDUCED!”
You bet!
JOAN (CONT’D)
ED
What is her problem, anyway?
And I’m sure you’ll give it a nice,
BILL
sharp paint job to match your
(sighs)
house. Just like you did a few
Meredith has... many problems Joan.
summers ago.
She’s doing her best.
JOAN
JOAN
Apple-orchard red with heather gray
Her best? Would it kill her to keep
trim!
her lawn in shape like the rest of BILL
us? She doesn’t even trim her
Well, I love to paint almost as
hedges!
much as you love to mow, Ed! ED
ED scorns as he looks over at MEREDITH’s
(chuckling)
house. He spits off the side of his mower.
Well, we all have our yard work vices, right?
ED Pathetic.
JOAN
JOAN
Sign me up for anything but
I don’t know how she expects to
shoveling snow!
sell that house if she can’t even
They all share a neighborly laugh. ED
keep her yard presentable. It’s an eyesore.
Well, that’s just swell you two are
BILL
making some home improvements.
She has good intentions, Joan. It’s
That’ll definitely boost up the
just that, she’s all alone. Doesn’t
property value for all of us on
have anybody to help her.
this court. JOAN Sure will. Well, almost all of us. JOAN glances over to the far end of the cul de sac. We see a modest, slightly dilapidated
JOAN Except for her handy neighbor, Bill! BILL I help her out with little chores
7
when I can, it’s the right thing to
DIANE, JOAN, and ED all gaze back at BILL with
do.
soured expressions. BILL meets their eyes,
continues raking.
JOAN She doesn’t even have a job! She’s
JOAN
got all the time in the world!
Well, she certainly showed you
DIANE, another middle-aged neighbor,
around, didn’t she?
approaches the center of
BILL
the cul de sac to join the conversation. She’s
I mean, for Christ’s sake Joan- of
holding a thermal mug of coffee, wearing curlers
course I’ve gotten to know that
in her bleach blonde hair.
house. I’ve been helping her with
DIANE
odd jobs for years now.
Who, Meredith? Yeah, I heard she
DIANE
got a good offer on that house two
She’s always claiming to be so
years ago when she first put it on
“busy,” like that’s her excuse for
the market. But she turned it down
not keeping up the appearance of
because she thought she deserved
her yard. Not doing her part like
more. Can you believe that? Who is
the rest of us.
she to be picky?
JOAN
JOAN
Busy doing what? All I’ve ever seen
Beggars can’t be choosers.
her do is root through our
DIANE
recycling bins collecting plastic
That’s right.
bottle caps.
ED
DIANE
Six-foot high weeds in the
She goes through your recycling
backyard. Rotting wood fences.
too? What the hell does she do with
Overgrown shrubs. Mess of
those?
dandelions in the grass all summer.
JOAN
Pathetic, just pathetic.
I don’t know, she really must have
ED spits again.
a couple screws loose.
BILL Well, structurally her house is ok.
BILL makes a very controlled, circular sweeping
motion with his rake. We briefly see that his leaf
The roof’s in good shape. Newer
8
his rake. We briefly see that his leaf pile has been
furnace. Perfectly fine electrical
formed into a strange spiral shape. He then
wiring...
pauses from raking.
BILL
JOAN
Well, if I may interrupt the
I thought you already got a good
chatter- you all should know that
offer two years ago?
Meredith could be facing
MEREDITH
foreclosure by year’s end if she
No. No I didn’t.
doesn’t get a buyer lined up.
MEREDITH walks away with her mail, most of
DIANE
Good! We could all use a better
which are bills from past due credit cards. ED spits again.
neighbor. Someone who knows some
CUT TO:
basic yard up-keep!
MEREDITH is suddenly heard several yards away.
INT.- MEREDITH’S HOUSE
She is getting
We pan slowly across the living room into the
her mail at the mailboxes in the center of the cul
kitchen. We see outdated furniture, carpeting and
de sac.
upholstery. The kitchen floor is visibly clean, but
She is in her early sixties but appears much
the tile is peeling. There are handles missing from
younger.
recently polished cabinets. Several bills are strewn
across the kitchen table. Next to the bills is her
phone, which is visibly set to speaker mode.
MEREDITH (yelling so they can hear her from across the way)
SPEAKERPHONE
Hi Diane, Bill, Joan.
You have one new message.
(beat.)
(A male voice begins.)
Ed.
Hi Meredith, this is Ted, your
DIANE and JOAN give half-hearted waves, putting
lawyer.
minimal
Look, we need to at least get an
effort into feigning friendly smiles. BILL smiles
offer on the house by the end of
warmly as
the month. Otherwise they’ll move
he rakes. ED just sits on his mower, staring at
right into scheduling a sheriff’s
MEREDITH with
sale-
a distant scorn. MEREDITH (CONT’D)
The voice mail becomes less audible as we
continue panning from the kitchen into the
Hey, if you all happen to know
basement stairwell. MEREDITH is heard off
anyone looking for a house, I just
camera, reacting to the voice mail as if it were
lowered the price. I could really
a conversation.
use a good offer.
9
MEREDITH I know Ted, I just need to stall a little longer. We continue to pan down the stairwell. It is bare,
save for a few cardboard boxes. We move into a
large laundry room. In the corner of the room we
see a wall decorated with an intricately patterned
mural of plastic bottle caps- from milk cartons,
soda liters, etc. There is a swirling, geometric precision to the pattern, with colorscorresponding and smaller caps arranged towards the center of the spiral. The mural must be composed of tens of thousands of caps. MEREDITH is kneeled before the mural, carefully placing a few more bottle caps towards its center. No adhesive is used, the caps just seems to magnetically lock into place as she holds them up to the wall. MEREDITH (CONT’D)
Just. A little. Longer.
MEREDITH places one last cap in the mural and her eyes widen. The mural suddenly becomes very animated, swirling rapidly on the wall like a colorful whirlpool. A beam of intensely bright white light emerges from its center. MEREDITH walks into the light.
FADE TO WHITE.
CUT TO:
EXT.- AN EMPTY BEACH, MID-DAY. We see BILL’s smiling face. He is barefoot, dressed in all white cotton. He reaches out and takes MEREDITH’s hand. She is also dressed in all white cotton. They embrace and kiss affectionately. MEREDITH Thank you for all your help.
10
FADE OUT.
John Starr
Jardley Jean-Louis
Kevin Speidell
Jacob Sanders