A-Desiflava June-July 2015

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H O N G KONG ’S F IRS T L I F ES TYL E M A G A Z I N E F O R S O U T H A S I A N S

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June-July

2015

HK! IN

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BEST REAL STORY WINNER

In the previous issue we had run a paranormal story writing contest. The idea was that readers should share any of their own and real paranormal experiences.

Jitendra Kotai from Tung Chung is our winner and below is his real life paranormal experience story : We were going on a family trip to Raigad to meet a few relatives and friends.

I woke up with a hypnic jerk as there was a sudden squeaking sound of the car brakes. My eyes were drooping as it had been a very tiring journey. I looked around to see that all my family members were asleep. The Only Person awake was my Uncle who was driving.

The Car had come to a sudden halt as a lady was walking on the highway casually and she came close to being hit by our car.

She came close to the window and knocked on the glass.

As i lowered the window pane and looked at her closely, she looked mentally unstable there were scars on her face as if someone had hit her brutally. Her bruised face looked really terrifying... She had bloodstains on her hands and clothes...

Her eyes were tired, as if she had not slept for ages. She had a cold gaze which made her look extremely spooky...

My Uncle decided to help her on humanitarian grounds .He got down from the car and walked towards her. He was concerned about her safety and well being and he asked “Are you Alright?”

She nodded her head furiously and annoyed by the innocent question, she pushed my uncle away. He fell on the ground jolted by the sudden insane reaction by the lady Suddenly she let out a loud shriek and looked at us with bloodshot eyes and burst into a manic laughter. i quickly closed the window pane which was half lowered and closed it slightly before she could put her hand in. She banged on the window panes and her screaming just would not stop.

This really traumatized me and my mind stopped functioning for a few seconds. In that moment I felt certain numbness where I felt I could not move an inch. My Heart was pounding furiously and the fear of what this lady could do further made me suffer a nervous breakdown of sorts.

She started powerfully banging the car as my uncle hurriedly got into the car then Uncle quickly applied the reverse gear on the car and tried to move out from a different lane. She started frantically running behind the car and pelting stones on the car.

The Car broke down and uncle kept trying to make futile attempts to start it again the Lady came near the car again.

This time my uncle got down and started scolding her.

This made her cry. She started crying like a maniac. Her cries were really scary.

And then she pointed her finger to my uncle and cursed him. She said in a very husky voice that he will die a very traumatic death and walked across the road and disappeared.

Well my uncle is still around and very healthy. Whoever she was, a Ghost or an Insane Woman. She left an impact. Whenever I imagine this scenario, it still gives me goosebumps

BIG THANKS TO YOU GUYS! Your comments, feedback, views and participation is of utmost importance to us. We appreciate your time taken in writing back to us.

Excuse my ignorance when I say I didn’t know about the Ravindra Patil case and when I read the article I was mighty shocked. Though when the accident had occurred I knew then it Salman Khan WOULD BE ABSOLVED and rightly so when the verdict is out now. Justice delayed is justice denied but even after the delay there’s no justice here. This article in hk does nothing to evoke anything against bollywood stars in India. I don’t know how many actually know about Patil. I personally feel u should send the article to people like Aamir Khan Etc who put him on a pedestal by having him as guest on Satyamev Jayate which is a much respected show. If Salman Khan is held as a star then all criminals too should be set free and invited as guests and this is what the younger generation should be like? Have such idols to follow?

I sincerely feel u should do something about letting AK know about this. They have their site where u can write to them.

Thanks, Sheetal (an Indian in hk)

Hi Sheetal, Thank you for sharing your comments and views after reading Salman Khan’s article published in our April 2015 Issue. No Justice Here is the right word you’ve used. India will never change and the system itself is corrupt right from its roots. In fact the govt. should take strict action and put eminent personalities behind bars for false doings to set examples for others. Salman is a very influential person (I believe) and will never be facing any imprisonment, this case will just go on and on and Salman will keep making crores and crores with his new releases. As per one of the bollywood news, Aamir Khan, was one of the first person to visit Salman’s house in Bandra to give sympathy to Salman Khan’s parents after the 5 years jail news came out. Every common man of India including the entire Bollywood fraternity and even the entire legal system, cops, his own family and everyone knows that its Salman who was drunk and driving, but still no one is willing to come forward, join together, fund this activity and make sure this guy is behind the bars. I strongly believe that things will never change in India unless a big change starts working its way up from the roots which are corrupt.

Keep in touch, as I’d like to have connects with like minded people who care for their country and people.

Regards, Gaurav Hey Gaurav, This is Krishvi ,.... I got you’re this month edition, and I would like to tell you that it’s irresistible..... The Salman Khan Reality check is an eye opener and you really need courage and guts to write this and put it up to public. I wanted you to know that we all love Adesiflava magazine and keep giving us this type of more informative matter to read.

Hey, I also heard about Aamchi Mumbai’s growing admiration.... Many congrats for that.

Thanks, God Bless and Good luck For all your future ventures!!

Krishvi,

A real life story submitted by Mr.Jitendra Kotai

Hi Krishvi, Thank you so much for your appreciation and liking for our magazine. In this issue we have added even gutsier article about some south Asian thugs who would cheat tourists in Hong Kong by claiming they are astrologers and fortune tellers. Beware of these swindlers who are mostly found in Tsim Sha Tsui area where you live.

Keep reading every issue of Adesiflava,

Jitendra has a Bachelors Degree in Financial Accounting from Mumbai, India He Works for a reputed logistics company in Hong Kong, He is a Cricket Enthusiast, a big movie buff and a Voracious reader. Creative Writing is his passion. He regularly writes short stories

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Best wishes Gaurav

www.adesiflava.com

Never give up on

Hong Kong!

Hello people...,

I’m a simple girl, my name is Alpana (name changed) and basically I wanted to share my changeover of life from the so called and actually felt Indianism to after marriage life in Hong Kong and the Hong Kongism culture!

In very simple words I can say the adaption period was not easy!! It took a couple of good five years for this life changing and transition period., and I must admit that I’m still learning and adjusting as I’m going along the marriage road to reach my final destination. I’m from India (Nasik), got arranged marriage in Hong Kong. As many of us get excited to live a life in a foreign country, and have fun was never in my mind, I was always against getting married and settling in abroad , I wanted to be in India and I was deeply an Indian as in from using natural stuff like Dant Manjan to Multani Mitti and Turmeric for Chandan etc.

I got married in Hong Kong, ah! And from here started a new life or better still a new shock, I guess I’m speaking the hearts of many girls who are from India, and married in Hong Kong. One thing is for sure every girl goes through this change over phase and deals in her own way to be a part of her new family. I must say some settle in a year or 2 years time while others take a good long time.

For me, it was not easy, I came from a big family, and after marriage had a very small family. The initial months were like a fairy tale period, with honeymoon and after honeymoon extravaganza, but the reality struck in after almost a year after marriage where life came to a standstill. I don’t know or may be was too innocent to understand how life in Hong Kong is super different or much faster than in India.... During the time I got married. Now as they say that India is speeding up., but still there are so many things in India... This will always be there no matter how much India changes, but will not be found in Hong Kong.

I started feeling super empty, hollow from inside as all the people in my house went for work from 9 am and returned later at 7ish. My entire day was spent at home, alone for a few months and later I got a helper to talk to when no one was home. I missed the love and joy that and the concern and care which I felt in India was somewhere missing in Hong Kong and I felt it really too much, My husband’s job was though, he had to work from 8am to 10pm, every day and on weekends he was posted in China, it was tough. My in-laws had their own fixed time and Schedule although my mother in law was always very supportive and with me emotionally during my hard times. I felt useless and depressed, I was always cursing my family in India as to why they got me fixed up here, I used to cry and feel low all the times., everything was different in Hong Kong... From eating habits to doing out to partying, everything was so different.

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Life seemed like hell at one point of time ... When no one’s was around me to talk and Felt rely miserable for some time.

It seemed like I was going through this terrible culture shock, which was killing me. It was this time ... When I realized what the importance of a family is and that you are nothing without it.

I went back after 1 and a half year of marriage I left for India., came back with all the warmth and happiness to start again, got a job, got busy felt good, made friends...,went out, starting enjoying and adapting Hong Kong and slowly developed love for this city of pomp and show.

Life seemed meaningful, work gave me scope to express myself and all this in-turn helped me to stabilize and settle completely in my married life, it seemed good , but along the way I faced ups and downs, as anyone would but for me , somehow things have always been extremes.... The ups have been higher ups and the downs have been deeper downs, but as all say you learn to swim only when you’re thrown into the deep sea.

Must I must say, and now I can say that Hong Kong as made me a new me, it is a city where everyone can find opportunities to do something unlike India.... I owe a lot to this city as it has made or take out the best in me and I hope will continue to, it is a place which teaches you that you are born alone and will die alone.... All around you have their own life and path to follow... So don’t get super attached to anyone, you will get hurt. I love Hong Kong and I want to thanks this beautiful city which has changed me so much so far and definitely till the end for good.

Love you H- Happy and happening city!!

O- Open to all!!

N- Nostalgic!!

G- Go getter!!

K- Killer attitude!!

O-Out of this world!!

N-New everyday!!

G- Greatly inspiring!!

A story shared by a reader who felt the need to express her feelings about living in Hong Kong and how it has changed her life. The name of the contributor is kept anonymous and is changed in the story based on the request made by the contributor.

Adesiflava magazine wants to thank you for taking out the time to express your feelings through the magazine. We are sure your story will be read by many Indian women who are still finding it difficult to cope up with the lifestyle in Hong Kong.

If anyone wishes to get in touch with the writer or wants to share their own story, please write back to us on adesiflava@gmail.com

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H

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Editors Note Entertain

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H ONG KONG ’S F I RST L I F E S T Y LE M A GA Z I N E FO R S O U T H A S I A N S

HIGH ALERT

June-July

2015

HK! IN

BEWARE OF THESE MEN ON THE FRONT COVER: Illustration with line drawing, trying to highlight some unidentified thugs in HK EDITOR: Pardeshi, Gaurav Ashok PUBLISHER: Neha G.Pathak DESIGN CONSULTANT: Sivasakthibalan CONTRIBUTORS: Faiz Qezilbash Tanya Singh Azake Rehman Poonam Mehta Bejan Daruwala Ashwani Arora Padmini Pandit Ivy Chan Sumati Prabhakaran ADESIFLAVA PRIVATE LIMITED: Suite D, 3rd Floor,Lyton Building, 36-38 Mody Road, Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon, Hong Kong T: +852-23631786 Email: info@adesiflava.com

FOR ADVERTISEMENTS PLEASE CONTACT: Gaurav Pardeshi T +852-95433660 Email: gaurav@adesiflava.com PRINTED BY: 01 Printing Limited Suite M, 3/F., Tower 3, 448 Kwun Tong Road, Kwun Tong Industrial Center, Kwun Tong, Kowloon, Hong Kong.

Tel.: (852) 2811-1183 COVER DESIGN: Studio3 Creations DISCLAIMER: No part of this magazine may be reproduced in any form without permission.

The publisher, layout designer, contributors, their employees and partners are not responsible for the results of any actions, errors or omissions taken on the basis of information contained in this publication and expressly disclaim all and any liability for any such action of any person. The views expressed in A-Desiflava are not necessarily those of the publisher, editor, layout designer or contributors. The publisher, layout designer and editor cannot be held responsible for differences of opinion or statements published in good faith. The mention of specific companies or products in articles or advertisements does not imply that they are endorsed or recommended by this magazine or its publisher in preference to others of a similar nature which are not mentioned or advertised.

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Hello! I am writing this note while caressing my new born baby boy. June, I just love you so much from the bottom of my heart. This month has now become the most auspicious and important month in my life as Neha and I got gifted with a baby boy. I think i’m being an extra caring and overpossessive father, which i need to stop before the magazine gets even more delayed with its release in the months to come.

Have you ever come across some Indian men in HK who claim to be astrologers or palmist’s? They are not known or commonly seen faces, but are some kind of thugs who will try to trap you thinking you are a tourist and will try to either hypnotise you or brainwash you in such a way that you will end up giving him everything that you have inside your wallet. Don’t be shocked, most of you know about it or have heard about it from friends. When i was new to HK, in year 2011, i was almost mugged by one such guy. Now even after 4 years i saw the same men operating near the TST Victoria Harbour area, trying to make fool out of some tourists. Its sad, really very sad i must say. My dear friend and talented writer Faiz has helped me in putting this entire thing down in the form of an article. Our idea with this article is to only alert you about something like this happening in your beautiful city of Hong Kong, and also to encourage you to please notify us or Police if you see any such foul play happening in any part of HK. Afterall, they are spoiling the name of our country. Read the cover story Swindlers or Sooth Sayers.

IN THE MOOD, has some lovely messages for Father’s Day given by some of the HK’s local kids who would still remain kids in the eyes of their loving and caring daddies.

IN THE MOOD, is doubled this time with the ongoing Ramadan Eid festival.

Azake Rehman our regular contributing photographer had the priviledge to do an Umrah trip in Saudi Arabia. He’s taken some beautiful photos during his entire trip. I thought nothing could be better than a photo story about Umrah trip which is the next biggest thing after touring the sacred Haj. To all my muslim friends in Hong Kong, On behalf of the entire team of Adesiflava magazine I would like to wish you all a very happy and prosperous Ramadan Eid Mubarak!

With the other stuff like Politics, Love & Relationships, Fashion, Aunty MVP and Astrology, i am sure you will be glued to this issue till you reach the last page.

Thanks to all for sending us your feedbacks, comments and views for my previous issue, i am very happy that you guys are responding to all the experimental and gutsy articles like the Salman Khan one in the previous issue. Please keep the emails coming in with your raves and rants.

Feel free to write back to me anytime from anywhere, I’m waiting for your pokes. Please write back to me on gaurav@adesiflava.com Enjoy reading every page and don’t forget to pass it on.

gaurav@adesiflava.com

www.adesiflava.com

Content 1

COVER STORY �������� 08

2

IN THE MOOD ���������� 12

3

IN THE MOOD ���������� 16

4

FEATURE ���������������� 22

5

HEALTH & WELLNESS ������������� 26

Unidentified South Asian Thugs of HK

Father’s Day Special

Eid Mubarak

Indian Women leave Jobs after Marriage

HIV Aids

6

BEAUTY & HEALTH �� 30

7

EK LOVE STORY ������ 34

8

Aunty MVP ������������� 36

9

ASTROLOGY ����������� 38

India Fashion Week Spring Summer Collection 2015

Padmini & Anksh

Love and Relationship

By Bejan Daruwala

10 DESI FACES

OF HK �������������������� 40

11 KIDS CONTEST ������� 42 www.adesiflava.com

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Cover Story

SWINDLERS SOOTHSAYERS? OR

“Good morning sir, is everything alright?

You seem stressed. Its financial trouble isn’t it?

You don’t have to worry, because I have a solution to your problems.

I can foresee that your luck is about to change for the better. The stars will start favouring you soon, and that will mean the end to all your worries.”

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www.adesiflava.com

Cover Story Do these lines sound familiar?

Have you ever been approached by a South Asian man, usually dressed in white and been told that he can fix your problems? Also did you give him any money?

If you did, there’s a good chance that you have been swindled my friend, because that is precisely what these men are, swindlers. And yes, there’s more than one, in fact there’s an entire group. From what I’ve heard they are extremely active in the Tsim Sha Tsui area, primarily near Victoria Harbour.

Here’s a little rundown of their modus operandiMr. A will identify a prospective victim and will inform Mr.B, who will then initiate a conversation with the victim. While all of this is going on a third individual will be on vigil and will immediately inform his comrades, in case there are cops in the vicinity.

They have a very organized network and watch out for each other. Also they are multilingual and try and target victims across various nationalities.

I’ll begin with an experience that I had at the Wanchai Convention Centre two years ago. I was approached by a middle-aged South Asian man, Indian in all probability, who after exchanging pleasantries started blabbering about how I could better my life, if I paid attention to what he was saying, and followed his instructions. He then claimed to have looked into my past and said that he could tell me things, which only individuals close to me were aware of. When I asked to him what these details were, he came up with some of the most ridiculous theories, and made me laugh out so loud that the exhibitors at the adjacent booth thought that I had gone of my rocker.

After this nonsensical fifteen minutes session, he insisted that I give him some money as a small remuneration for his services. I retorted back by saying that I had no time for such senseless information, and demanded that he leave immediately.

The second and more sinister incident was narrated by my friend Jeet Kotai. He was working If you are the adventurous sort and want to actually for an Indian businessman, a couple of years back, witness the above, try and visit Victoria Harbour when one morning they had a surprise visitor at between 9:30 am and 11:30am in the morning, and the office. A man dressed in white came and met start from the ferry pier end. It’ll be great to have with the company’s owner and spent about 30 some feedback from you, in case you encounter minutes with him in his cabin. these men.

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Cover Story

Note: - Please note that it is not our intention to hurt religious sentiments or target a particular nationality or community. As a magazine that deeply cares about its readers, our sole objective is to warn them against illegal and inappropriate practices and protect them. *Desi- a term used in India or Pakistan to describe someone who is indigenous or local

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Cover Story After they had finished their conversation, the owner summoned Jeet, who was handling the accounts and insisted that he give the gentleman in white a cheque of ten thousand Hong Kong dollars. Jeet complied with his boss’s request and did exactly that. However after the man in white left the office, Jeet’s boss who claimed that he was in some kind of a trance, realized that he had given a few thousand dollars that he was carrying in his wallet, to the man in white and also did not seem to have any recollection of asking Jeet to issue a cheque in his name. The cheque was immediately blocked; however the cash that was given could not be recovered. So what do you think happened? Did the man in white hypnotize Jeet’s boss and rob him of his money?

I know that this might sound absurd and farfetched, but wait till you read this. Gaurav Pardeshi, narrated an incident to me which was very reminiscent of what happened with Jeet’s boss.

He told me that one evening; a young Filipino man who was dining at Aamchi Mumbai came up to him and said something about be ing robbed by a South Asian man. Initially Gaurav could not comprehend what this man was trying to say, however after a little bit of effort he realized that the Filipino man had been stopped by a South Asian man, below the restaurant, just before he was entering the building. The Filipino man claimed that he could not remember anything after that, and when he checked his pockets before getting into the elevator, his wallet which had about HKD 1,000 in it, was gone.

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The following day, Gaurav brought this to the attention of a friend who is with Hong Kong Police Department. The friend concurred and told Gaurav that the police department had been receiving a lot of complaints from Mainland Chinese tourists, who had been fleeced by men befitting the description mentioned by the Filipino man, in the Victoria Harbour area.

There are several other incidents that have been narrated to me by friends and coworkers. Some of them involve hypnosis, while others are experiences similar to mine.

I did a bit of reading on hypnosis and will not bore you with the scientific details. However from what I could gauge, it is an art that can be mastered rather quickly, if taught well and practiced intensively.

We live in a world of fake godmen and deceiving babas, who target the weak and the gullible. Are these men an extension of that wretched brigade? My assessment of human character is usually not very accurate; however it did not take me more than two minutes to realize that the man at the convention center was an absolute fraud, and that the entire facade of him being able to solve my problems was a hoax.

So beware my friends and the next time you see a desi* man in white walking towards you and claiming to be your messiah, steer clear of him or else you will end up as just another number on his long list of victims.

Article written and researched by: Faiz Qezilbash

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IN THE MOOD

MyDaddy

Strongest I wish I could tell you Dad, how much you mean to me....

I have no words to say about how much I appreciate you... how much I admire you... how much I thank you for everything you’ve done.

I love you so much Dad...

Happy Father’s Day Love Kunal Amarnani

ADESIFLAVA WISHES ALL THE FATHERS A VERY HAPPY FATHER’S DAY ON THE 21ST OF JUNE 2015.

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IN THE MOOD

MESSAGEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FOR MR.VIJAY PRAKASH D MEHTA FROM HIS KIDS.

Message from Son Mickey Mehta for his father Mr.Vijay Prakash D Mehta Papa, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.

Thank you for being the kind Father that you are and I pray for your continued good health, Happy Fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day! Love Mash (Mickey Mehta) Message from Daughter Sudha for her father Mr.Vijay Prakash D Mehta To my dearest darling Papa From the time I was born you have brought me up like a princess.

I cherish my beautiful childhood as each and every memory I have growing up has been a happy one.

Thank you for giving us such a comfortable life and a loving home.

You have dedicated your life to your children. You are the best Dad in the world. Your kind heart and beautiful smile warms our heart every time I see you. God bless the beautiful person you are. You are a man of few words but your actions speaks volumes. God bless you abundantly my darling Papa with good health and happiness always.

Loves From your daughter Sudha www.adesiflava.com

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Message from Son Tony for his father Mr.Vijay Prakash D Mehta My Father, A man whose mere presence can make one feel secure and loved without having to exchange words. His humility which is unparalleled is an inspiration to those around him. To be loved unconditionally is a blessing and Dad does it best. Love You Dad and God Bless Always Your Son Tony

Message from daughter Seerat for her father Mr.Manjit Singh

Papa I love you, coz you take me to the swimming pool, You let me play on I-pad You buy me Ice-cream, I want more kinder Joy, My papa is the best in this world Love you Papa loads, Seerat.

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IN THE MOOD

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IN THE MOOD

Wishing you an Eid that brings with it the love and protection of Allah to stay...Always.

On this very special occasion of Eid, we decided to have a photo article exclusively done by our friend and Photographer Azake Rehman.

Azake had recently travelled to the pilgrimage Umrah with a small group of friends from Hong Kong. During his trip to Umrah he has captured some great shots for all of us to have a virtual visit to the Pilgrimage to Mecca in Saudi Arabia.

Here’s some info. about Umrah :

The Umrah (Arabic: ‫ةرمع‬‎) is a pilgrimage to Mecca, Saudi Arabia, performed by Muslims that can be undertaken at any time of the year, in contrast to the Hajj. In Arabic, Umrah means “to visit a populated place”. In the Sharia, Umrah means to perform Tawaf round the Kaaba and Sa’i between Al-Safa and Al-Marwah, after assuming Ihram (a sacred state), either from a Miqat like Zu ‘l-Hulafa, Juhfa, Qarnu ‘l-Manāzil, Yalamlam, Zāt-i-’Irq, Ibrahīm Mursīa, or a place in Hill. It is sometimes called the ‘minor pilgrimage’ or ‘lesser pilgrimage’, the Hajj being the ‘major’ pilgrimage and which is compulsory for every able-bodied Muslim who can afford it. The Umrah is not compulsory but highly recommended.

(About Umrah Contents courtesy: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Umrah) Photography by: Azake Rehma www.adesiflava.com

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POLITICS

SUSHMA SWARAJ

US PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA BEING INVITED AS THE CHIEF GUEST AT THE REPUBLIC DAY PARADE WAS ANNOUNCED

BY MODI HIMSELF!

MARGINALIZED!

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POLITICS Until recently, when the Congress was in power, Sushma Swaraj was the most appreciable face of the Bharatiya Janata Party in parliament. As the leader of the opposition in the Lok Sabha, the fiery Swaraj led fierce attacks against the ruling alliance. She cornered the UPA government on several occasions with her powerful oratory and uncompromising stand.

Given her profile and seniority, she was expected to be the party’s choice as the prime ministerial candidate.

But all changed as the Modi Juggernaut stormed in power, a year ago leaving the BJP old guards (read Advani Camp) with no other choice.

However, Sushma Swaraj, was made the external affairs minister. It is a different matter that is virtually invisible and is neither seen nor heard. Her interaction with the media is minimal. She is also not seen tweeting as frequently as she did earlier on. Reduced to reading out statements on Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s successful visits abroad, her presence is not much felt in the Parliament.

Perhaps it is quite evident that Modi is calling the shots, at least, as far as our foreign policy is concerned. He is often assisted in this task by the National Security Advisor, Ajit Doval. For instance, the news about US president Barack Obama being invited as the chief guest at the Republic Day parade was announced by Modi himself! One may recall that during the Vajpayee regime, such announcements were the prerogative of the then External Affairs minister Yashwant Sinha.

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POLITICS Modi’s official trips to various countries and the series of meetings he has held with numerous world leaders since he assumed office,has sent out a firm message that he, and he alone, is the face of Indian diplomacy. Speculation about Swaraj’s marginalization has been rife ever since she took over the external affairs ministry.

She did not accompany Modi when he visited Brazil and Japan and she was again missing on his trips to Australia, Fiji and Myanmar, though she did make it to the United States and Nepal.

There is growing talk in various circles that Swaraj has a peripheral role in key foreign policy issues, which are being handled by the prime minister’s office. In fact, this message has even travelled to foreign shores. A former diplomat of a neighboring country, commented that there were

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high hopes from Swaraj but they soon realized that “she is not in the loop” in her own government.

opposed Modi’s candidature as prime minister till the bitter end.

“Yet she was given one of the four top portfolios, which also makes her a member of the key cabinet committee on security,” said a BJP leader. But not many are convinced with this argument. “The fact is that she is paying the price for opposing Modi,” remarked a long-time BJP watcher. “She certainly does not have the same space in this government as Arun Jaitley, or as Jaswant Singh had in the Vajpayee government.”

Modi camp followers cite the examples of his predecessors who believed that foreign policy had always been handled by the prime minister’s office and that an external affairs minister is not always expected to travel with the prime minister on his foreign trips. Moreover, they point out that Swaraj has visited several countries like Singapore, Vietnam, Bangladesh and Nepal on her own and her discussion However having said all that it with leaders here have been still remains an amalgamation of highly successful. the available news from various resources citing that each one At the same time, BJP insiders of us has a right to’ construe’ or admit that Swaraj was lucky rather ‘misconstrue’ in our own to have got a portfolio of terms.. her choice even though she has always had an uneasy Article written by: relationship with Modi. Known Tanya Singh: a housewife with a for her proximity to veteran BJP passion for writing and a mother of two lovely daughters with a zeal and leader LK Advani, Swaraj had enthusiasm towards life

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Featured

WHY DO MOST

INDIAN WOMEN

QUIT WORK DS? AFTER KI

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In a discussion that went viral on the Web, PepsiCo’s India-born CEO Indra Nooyi, among the world’s most powerful women, acknowledged, “I don’t think women can have it all.”

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Featured Ms Nooyi admitted that she had died with “guilt” several times as she tried to bring up her two daughters as a working mom. Her remarks struck a deep chord with women all over the world, who are juggling career and home. A lot of Hong Kong women make the choice of quitting full-time work to bring up their kids, but the trend is most discernible within the Indian community. When even Bollywood actresses, who’ve achieved the rare super-stardom, leave it all for their children, it does makes you wonder why. Popular actresses like Kajol, Karisma Kapoor and Aishwarya Rai gave up films and projects to cater to their children. Madhuri Dixit and Sridevi, both the highest paid actresses of their time, opted for motherhood over stardom.

Raised according to a culture where social norms dictate that women prioritize family over everything else, Indian women join work in good numbers but very few make it to the top. Is it subconscious social rearing within our patriarchal culture, or “motherly guilt”? A little bit of both, I found, after talking to some of Indian-origin professionals in Hong Kong.

Hard work and ambition had enabled Manisha Sharma, a banker from Quarry Bay, to schmooze up in the dotcom boom. Nothing could stop her, until she had a child. “I had finally achieved what I had always wanted – a family. But after Vedika’s birth I found it harder and harder to be the mother I wanted to be and still be a thorough professional. The jigsaw puzzle I had built of my life was falling apart!

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I peered at the other women on the commute- with perfect makeup and hair, while I was a mess, and I didn’t know what Vedika was eating for any meal that week.

At that point, I decided to resign. That final Friday, when I handed over my laptop and phone, was one of the happiest days in my life. No more cobbling childcare, neverending deadlines, hurried meals…..I’ve spent the past six months focusing on my family and I realize that my daughter is a very happy child.

The rearing in an “all Indian” family adheres to a mom’s primary role of being the nurturer, despite exceptions where the woman of the home has had to be the bread-winner. It’s tough balancing that mother’s instinct with the killer instinct to win today’s rat race. Sneha Tolani, the hotshot HR executive from Mid Levels knows it all too well. Her joy knew no bounds the day Zubair was born. She hired a nanny, and turned a deaf ear to her in-laws’ warnings that the child was picking up bad habits and words. The bubble burst the day she heard her darling babble out slang. She instantly fired the nanny, e-mailed her resignation to her boss and became a hands-on momma to two-year-old Zubair.

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DOES SHE REGRET IT?

“Not a bit,” pat comes the reply. “If my son grows up to be a good human being, nothing can be more fulfilling. Leaving the workforce was not easy. I mourned my five years’ career. Days turned into weeks without an intelligent discussion. Boredom, and an intellectual vacuum set in. That’s when I decided to get some freelance work. Of course, I don’t get paid half of what I used to, but I am happy. I’m a part-timeworking-stay-at-home mom. To me, motherhood is a balance between maternal duties and intellectual satisfaction. After all, a happy mother raises a happy child!””

“I believe that women should have the choice. I don’t let anyone make me feel guilty, whether it’s for working through my difficult pregnancy, giving it all up before my promotion, running circles around my son... I stay at home for myself, it gives me immense satisfaction end of the day that I have done my best for my son,” concludes Sneha Tolani.

Zubair is shaping into a chirpy, disciplined boy, and Sneha is a content mom.

In many cases, it’s the unsaid clause that the wife will compromise, thanks to the Indian social conditioning. Yes, times are changing and such issues no more hinge on gender stereotypes. Today husbands and wives juggle the child’s responsibilities alongside professional ones. But we are yet to completely break away from the patriarchal scheme of things- family-building comes naturally to women and they have to voluntarily sacrifice their ambition for the family’s happiness.

“I knew well that if ever the need arose, it would be me, not my husband, who will have to quit. Fathers might enjoy a wonderful rapport with their kids, but mothers have a greater impact on the emotional learning process in their formative years,” feels Meghana Mathur, a former shipping professional in Tung Chung, who quit her 8-year-long career for the sake of her 3-year-old daughter.

A lot of women manage to break out of such social pressures, but still quit after motherhood. Their reasoning is different.

“I tried to be a super mom, a professional and a homemaker for four years, but I burnt out. It left me no me time,” shares Bhawana Daswani from Aberdeen. “It then dawned on me that there are mothers who opt to quit full-time work for their OWN sakes too! Not for their children, not for their husbands, not for anyone but themselves! I mean, my life changed! For one, I became INDEPENDENT! Yes, I was more dependant as a Working Mother- Dependant on my maid, Dependant on my parents, Dependent on anyone I could find to babysit my child while I got ‘more important’ work done. My mornings have become much easier, mealtimes are relaxed and tasty! The stress of the ever-disappearing maid has gone from my life, and my house has fewer temper tantrums!”

Article by:

Sumati Prabhakaran is a Creative Entrepreneur, an Artist, a Military Wife and Mother to two daughters. Writing is a passion which she pursues with zeal to mold into words her enriching experience as an urban Indian, a home-maker, a mother, travel addict and a contemporary woman. While working with a-desiflava, she had an opportunity to converse (through social networking sites like facebook and skype) with these HK based women who chose motherhood over their careers.

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Must Read

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AIDS is a transmissible disease caused by HIV and is deadly. To date HIV prevention program for the- ethnic minorities received limited attention. In view of this pressing need and supported by AIDS Trust Fund, the Nethersole school of Nuring, The Chinese University of Hong Kong conduct a “Fight against HIV among nonChinese Asians” project. The project aims to raise the awareness and knowledge of HIV/AIDS prevention, detection, and treatment with cultural and religion sensitive health contents, rectify the misconceptions of HIV/AIDS and educate them on how to live with HIV-infected people. Particularly for 5 ethic group (language of the group): Thai (Thai), Vietnamese (Vietnamese), Indian (Hindi), Nepalese (Nepalese), and Pakistani (Urdu).

Information about HIV/AISD, its transmission and prevention will be provide in this and the focusing two issues. More information can be found in the website.

Project Content: • Health educational talk and Roadshow related to AIDS • Health education in ethnic radio and newspaper • Free educational booklets (6 languages: English, Thai, Vietnamese, Hindi, Nepalese, and Urdu) • AIDS educational Website (6 languages): http://againsthiv.nur.cuhk.edu.hk/ • Free hotline with direct answer: 39439545 (Wed- Fri 5pm-9pm: Hindi, Nepali, Urdu) • Health check

(EVERY WED- FRI FROM 5PM-9PM: HINDI, NEPALI, URDU) Page - 26

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Health & Wellness

How can I protect myself from HIV infection?

The major routes of HIV transmission are sexual intercourse, sharing needles, syringes and other injection equipment and mother-child transmission. Precautions shall be taken to prevent HIV infection through these measures: Prevent HIV from sexual intercourse: • Use condoms correctly and consistently every time when you have sex of any kind. The use of water-based lubricants reduces the risk of condom tears.

• Do not have sex of any kind if condoms are not available.

• Know your HIV status and ask your partner to get tested before you have sex.

• Avoid direct contact with vaginal fluid, semen, and blood during sexual intercourse • Unprotected sex is safe only if both partners are HIV negative and monogamous (sexually active only with each other). Proper and consistent use of condoms is useful to prevent sexually-transmitted diseases among monogamous partners.

• Get treated if you or your partner have sexually transmitted disease.

Prevent HIV from needle sharing and needle injury: • Do not use drugs. If you do, do not inject. • Do not share tattoo and acupuncture needles.

• If you are injected drug user, always use clean needles and injection equipment. Do not share your used needles to others.

• HIV test is available in methadone treatment centres in Hong Kong.

• Dispose used needles and syringes in a rigid, puncture-resistant container such as a biscuit can. When two-third of the container is filled with used sharps, close the lid tightly, seal it with tapes, and label the container as sharps before disposing them with other household waste.

• If you are accidentally struck by another person’s used needle or other sharp, wash the exposed area with soap or alcohol-based handrub, and then seek medical attention immediately.

Prevent HIV from contacting body fluids: • Do not share toothbrush and razor blades.

• Do not expose injured skin. Apply dressing material on injured skin after proper cleansing.

• Wear appropriate personal protective equipment such as disposable gloves when in contact with body fluids.

Perform hand hygiene properly afterwards.

• Wash hands immediately and thoroughly after contact with blood or body fluids.

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Health & Wellness Prevent passing HIV to baby: Test for HIV status when you plan for a pregnancy or as soon as you find out you are pregnant.

Antiretroviral treatment during pregnancy, labor and delivery greatly reduces the risk of HIV transmission to infant.

Breastfeeding is strongly discouraged to mothers who are HIV positive.

Treatment is available to protect newborn babies from HIV infection.

If you are living with a HIV- infected person

• Practice all preventive measures stated in the previous section. Tell your family member, friend, and partner who are living with HIV to get ART if needed. The treatment will greatly improve their health and reduce the risk of passing the virus to others.

• HIV is not spread by day-to-day contact. Provide social support through keeping social contact with your HIVpositive family member, friend and partner.

• Provide emotional support, such as listening to and encouraging the person.

• Protect your significant others with HIV from other infections by practicing good hygiene and healthy lifestyle together.

• Learn how to give medicine and seek medical care in case of emergency.

• Sharing your frustrations with your friends and seek help from professional bodies if needed. A number of hotlines are available for HIV/AIDS information and HIV testing.

• If you suspect yourself getting infected, talk with a doctor immediately to see if post-exposure prophylaxis treatment is needed.

Proper use of male condom

• Use a new, good quality latex condom and check the expiry date before use.

• Put the condom on before the penis touches the vagina, mouth or anus.

• With care, hold the condom by the tip to squeeze out the air. This allows room for the semen.

• Put the condom on the end of the erect penis. Unroll it onto the erect penis all the way down to the hair.

• Ensure that adequate water-based lubricants are used during vaginal and anal sex. Oil-based lubricants should not be used.

• After ejaculation and before the penis gets soft, grip the rim of the condom and carefully withdraw.

• Gently pull the condom off the penis, making sure that semen doesn’t spill out. Wrap the condom in a tissue and throw it in the trash.

• Wrap the condom in a tissue and throw it in the trash.

Proper use of female condom

• Use a new, good-quality condom and check the expiry date every time before use.

• Identify the inner ring located at the closed end of the female condom. Use the thumb, the index finger and the middle finger to squeeze the lower part of the condom.

• Insert the inner ring into the vagina.

• Put a finger inside the female condom to push the inner ring further inside the vagina. The outer ring would be left outside of the vagina.

• After intercourse, twist the outer ring two to three rounds before pulling out the condom to avoid spillage of the semen.

Special thanks to our sponsor “The AIDS Trust Fund” Page - 28

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Beauty & Health

INDIA FASHION WEEK SPRING SUMMER COLLECTION 2015 The IFW SS ’15 concluded a couple of weeks back and I was really excited to attend it. I miss the frenzy, excitement and all the stress of deciding what to wear every morning. The thing about fashion week is that company matters a lot because you will up end spending quite a bit of time waiting between shows and of course taking selfies. Luckily for me I had Anshita & Shreya for company and these girls are an absolute blast.

Our personalities are quite similar and we always hit it off really well so they made fashion week all the more memorable.

Well, it might be a little late but I really wanted to showcase the highlights from Day 1 to 5 of IFW Spring Summer 2015. A few shows always stand out and I shall showcasing my top picks and trends from each day!

RAJPUTANA BY SAMANT CHAUHAN IN IFW SS 2015

The fashion week was kick started by Aneeth Arora’s Peru. The collection’s theme was floral which showed not just in the outfits but on the runway as well which was turned pretty much into a garden with saplings and flowers. It was aimed at the woman who would rather wear flowers in her hair than diamonds around her neck.

I loved the sheer tops with lace detailing and the bright flower embroidery. The hand crochet blouses and the beaded top were the highlights for me.

Designer duo Alpana-Neeraj’s collection at IFW 2015 was heavily influenced by the popular culture of “Kawaii” Lean structural details, sharp lines juxtaposed on softer curves and bows, large floral patches, waist sashes and tie-up elements all found their place. The attention grabbing headgear and bows on the dresses added an aura of fantasy and extravagance.

(ALPANA –NEERAJ’S COLLECTION IN IFW SS 2015)

The most awaited collection of the day was by the master of couture- Tarun Tahiliani.

The collection was inspired by the British-Indian artists Amrit and Rabindra Singh vivid paintings and the show was called The Singh Twins. He showcased a burst of color right from the skirts, dresses, saris to dhoti pants, harem pants, gilets and jackets. He mixed traditional motifs with his signatures silhouettes and borders with Persian motifs were used for skillful layering. The master certainly didn’t let us down and managed to wow us all.

(TARUN TAHILIANI’S COLLECTION IN IFW SS 2015)

On Day 2, a creative delight -Rajputana by Samant Chauhan. Known for his extensive handwork and detailing, the collection showcased sheer dresses, long skirts and hand weaved lehenga cholis with floral embroidery. The color palette was mostly white and pastels beautifully complimented with hues of blue, red and yellow embroidery. The show stopper was literally dressed as a bouquet and the sheer creativity bowled me over RAJPUTANA BY SAMANT CHAUHAN IN IFW SS 2015

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Beauty & Health Gauri & Nainika are known for their stylish, chic and wearable dresses.

Their Spring Summer Collection 2015 consisted of semi formals and the inspiration behind it was global warming. The pristine and whimsical collection consisted of maxi gowns, mermaid dresses and empire waist dresses. The inspiration was clearly visible in the prints and the clean tailored, silhouettes were impressive.

GAURI & NAINIKA’S COLLECTION IN IFW 2015

Malini Ramani certainly stole the show on day 2 of IFW SS 15. Her collection primarily consisted of hues of black, brown and gold. The play of sheer fabrics, sequins,plunging necklines and cuts was striking. The collection mostly consisted of kaftans, playsuits, and dresses MALINI RAMANI’S COLLECTION IN IFW 2015

Rajesh Pratap Singh’s Spring Summer Collection 2015 ‘Blue Blood’ was an ode to denims. While romancing with ikat, he innovates the fabric with stainless steel, khadi linen weaves and Jacquard stoles with selvedge details. The collection aimed at celebrating the purity as well as the versatility of his much beloved fabric- denim.

RAJESH PRATAP SINGH’S COLLECTION IN IFW 2015

My most awaited collection was ‘Patakha’ by Masaba Gupta. The models not only sashayed down the runway with patakhas in their hair but the collection saw many fireworks prints as well zodiac designs. Besides the quirky designs and laidback silhouettes what caught my eye were those jaw dropping accessories MASABA’ COLLECTION IN IFW SS 2015

On day 4, There is many shows and I had a tough time choosing my picks.

I chose Sahil Kocchar’s ‘Dhoop Chaun’ not only for his splendid collection of classic designs and embroidery but also for the fun and electrifying atmosphere that he created which had us all hooting in the end with models daning to ‘Yeh Jawani..’ with illuminated paper lamps. Talking about the collection, Savhil paid tribute to the beautiful craft of Mathura known as Sanjhi with beautiful 3D floral motifs and petal embroidery.

NIDA MAHMOOD’S COLLECTION IN IFW SS 2015

My most awaited collection was ‘Patakha’ by Masaba Gupta. The models not only sashayed down the runway with patakhas in their hair but the collection saw many fireworks prints as well zodiac designs. Besides the quirky designs and laidback silhouettes what caught my eye were those jaw dropping accessories MASABA’ COLLECTION IN IFW SS 2015

Courtesy : Heart Bows & Makeup Article by Ashwani TilakRaj Arora C/o Khushbu’s Collection-HK www.adesiflava.com

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Beauty & Health

LET’S MAKE THIS TOASTY, ROASTY, SWELTERING, SCORCHING’

SUMMER – SUPREMELY STYLISH! Bring on the colours, splash the florals, flaunt your chic shades in white, blue and red… it’s summer!

After a transition-wardrobe from cooler to warmer days that you wore last month it’s now time to gear up for the hottest month of the year. From colourful breezy dresses to Denim shorts… from summery skirts to hip hats, Amchi Mumbai’s fashion editor brings you a practical fashion guide to make you look cool and classy.

It’s brutal, it’s humid, it’s fashionable… welcome 2015 HK summer with this easy style guide for the hot hot month of June.

WHAT TO WEAR? KEEP IT BEAR! Time to invest in some floral, bright, summer dresses! They can be naughty short, decent knee covered or sultry ankle length. They could be in pretty pastels, candy coloured tie-dyes, sun-bursting bright prints or monotone neons. Make a pick as it suits your complexion, personal style and accessories.

Thanks to the big diversity of various styles available from the daring cut-outs and subtle peepholes the summer dresses can make you look smoking hot! You will be spoilt for choice–thank God we live in HK. Pair them up carefully with sandals or slip ons, flats or platforms and you are dressed to kill!

Want the chic look? Couple your casual summer dress with the skaters. Skater shoes are latest and greatest in the footwear trend.

They are comfy, they are sassy and they are the new ‘in thing’. Not to forget the mint booties… oh yes, they scream summer! The cool mint colour is a perfect reprise on a sunny day. The best thing about this colour – it is super adaptive. You can wear them with almost any colour and not worry about the whole “matching” hoopla.

WANNA LOOK WOW? MAXI SKIRTS ARE IN AND HOW! Maxi skirts are long, breezy and utterly feminine. They are perfect for this summer. Flaunt them with tanks or crops for a casual look and blazers or scarfs for a more formal stylish look.

NOT A DRESS PERSON? FLARES WILL GRAB THE STARES! This summer offers a fresh new look for the non-dress girlies.

The cropped baggies are in!!! Believe it or not… the fashion inventors have been working on making the baggie pants fashionable for the plain Jane. Hide your flab & look up-to-the-minute how cool would that be? This summer ditch those narrow bottoms for the flared hems and you are dressed to the nines.

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HOW TO TOP IT? CROP IT! Top it up with romantic lace tops or bold water colours. If you are brave & modish, the crop tops and bra tops are still holding their strong position this season. Off-theshoulder tops will be seen trending back -go get them girls!

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Beauty & Health BE WISE… ACCESSORIZE! No dress is complete without the accessories. Be it subtle, be it loud… the accessories can’t be ignored. Pair your tube dresses or off shoulders with chunky earrings and no necklace to enhance the look of the dress. Follow the general rule of wearing one piece of jewellery to create a head-turning impact. If you choose to wear necklace, take the earrings off and vice versa. Stack your fingers with delicate rings and wrist with bangles and bracelets. More is less with one-tone summer dress.

EYE-WEAR TRENDS:

PINKS OR PLUMS, YELLOWS AND BLUES… GET READY FOR THE COLOURFUL HUES. Anushka chooses a blue glass and

Think of summer & colours pop up instantly. round frame for a casual chic look No exception for sunnies. This roasting season is all about experimental, colourful frames & glasses. However if you are more for classics and less for the colours, white is still in rage.

Most fashion brands will have white frames in creative shapes for you to pick from.

From full round to deep ovals, flat squares to the fresh and new cat-eye frames there is a wide variety to complete your look.

It’s blue and round again for Amrita Arrora

Hairdos and don’ts for the summer of 2015

Short is hot

Bolder highlights, thick streaks are all you need to sizzle this summer.

What could be more practical than a short haircut for HK summers? Bollywood actresses too have been experimenting in this area. Sonakshi Sinha is looking chic and fab in her new short hair-do. Not to forget Jacqueline Fernandez who is totally rocking it in her cropped-hair look.

Go experimental with ponytails or buns and create your own uber cool hairstyle. Keep it ultra high for a neat, formal look.

Keep it super low for a casual, easy look. You may use the nude bows & bobby pins or bright, frilly, vibrant ones… as long as its complementing your dress you are doing it with style. It would be a fashion sin to not mention the slightly-careless or out-ofthe-bed look. It’s casual, it’s chic, and it is super summery.

Hide the sweat…Keep it wet.

If you are planning for an outing this summer, you really need to try the most-effortless and stylish jus-out-of-theshower look. It’s the most stylish way to hide the sweat in the hair, we know you will agree.

Nail trends: Nude hands and toes are the fashion foes It would be a crime to miss the sparkling, snazzy nail makeup.

The coolest manicure looks are trending to contrast this hot season.

Those little nails can create a whole new world of their own. Try incorporating the themes of travel or nature with palm tree nails or the sunrise nail look. Square off your long nails and heap them up with the summery 3D elements like flowers or butterflies for an edgy look.

Bless the street, Oh Fashion Goddess!

And lastly, look up high, take a deep breath of fashion, feel the turning heads and dropping jaws. Your summer look is unfinished without a dash of confidence and belief in your own style. Get inspired but do not copy, follow the trend but don’t miss to add your own glamour quotient

Stay in vogue, stay unique, stay stylish! www.adesiflava.com

How can we miss Anushka Sharma following the brand new trend of chopping the long tresses short.

About the author

Post graduate in Media and passionate in fashion, Padmini is a creative thinker, poetic writer and a successful media professional.

She specializes in creative content writing and has scripted for numerous Ads, Promos, Shows and Websites. From producing prime time shows for India’s leading radio Padmini Pandit station to managing the Sales and Marketing for Singapore’s most popular ethnic radio station, Padmini has played diverse roles in the Radio Industry.

She has interviewed the top most Bollywood stars on Radio & Television and hosted the red carpet interview for a Bollywood blockbuster film premier in Singapore. Known for her vivacious personality and immaculate fashion sense Padmini is a fun loving, people loving and an art loving person.

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Ek Love Story

in 2003

Aniksh & Padmini’s life: T

hose days were simple, smart-phones were not invented and having easy access to internet was a luxury. Orkut was trending and yahoo chat room was where youngsters hung out in spare times. Those were the days they fell in love, those were the days they survived a long distance relationship.

He was an engineering student. Quiet, studious, unsocial, always well-dressed and oh so handsome! He had only one close friend’s circle in his apartment with whom he literally grew up. Poonam was a quiet girl and she lived a floor above Aniksh. They both were great friends.

She was a commerce student. Loud, naughty, extremely social and outgoing. She was often seen at the college canteen and barely in classrooms. She had numerous friends & groups and she was loved by all. Poonam was her close friend. They went to the same tuition classes.

Poonam and Padmini would sit on the last bench of the class and that’s where they shared their thoughts and secrets. Poonam would always talk about Aniksh to Padmini. From his daily routine to his nature, from his parents to his friends, Padmini knew everything about Aniksh even before she met him and knew that he perfectly qualified as her dream boyfriend.

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“I still remember the day when I had first seen Padmini” recalls Aniksh. “It was a dull summer afternoon and I was trying to study for exams, saw this girl climbing up the stairs from a window of my room - beautiful, tall, simple, unwrapping herself from the silk yellow scarf that covered her face. I could not stop staring at her. My eyes followed her till she entered Poonam’s house and I sat there waiting for her to get out of the house so that I could catch another glimpse of her. When she left, I went running to Poonam. I talked to her about all unnecessary things till she mentioned about Padmini. Padmini … it was her! I knew at that very moment that I would marry her. I told so to my mom too…she thought I was joking.”

“When we met for the first time… I had chills in my spine and butterflies in my stomach. The wind was blowing and the stars were brighter that night” says Padmini before bursting into laughter. “Our first date was in Barista café on a rainy night. It was beautiful! But soon I had to move to Hyderabad for my first job and I thought this wouldn’t go too far. Being a commerce student I graduated in 3 years while Aniksh was still completing his final year of engineering. But Aniksh was persistent! We would speak on phone for hours. He came to Hyderabad twice to meet me. We watched movies and explored Hyderabad www.adesiflava.com www.adesiflava.com

together. We sat in the Birla temple for hours…not saying a word. Later Aniksh got a job in Mumbai and I shifted to Pune for further studies.

Ek Love Story

Aniksh says “Those were the best days! She would travel down to Mumbai on Friday evening after her college and we would live it up on the weekends in Mumbai. Then I would go to drop her to Pune on Sunday nights and take a late night bus back to Mumbai to reach directly to workplace on Monday morning” Padmini laughs to add “Oh we have done crazy things really!

We created false STD phone bills and posted them to our home to hide the number of calls we made to each other – those were the days of landline, you see. There were times when we acted like strangers on the same bus in presence of family members.

And then there were times when Aniksh would call my landline and say he was a professor from my college. All this before Aniksh moved to Singapore for work. 2 years of long distance relationship in times when there was no viber or whatsapp was not easy. Love survived it all. The thought of marrying each other shocked our families initially but with time and several meetings everybody was looking forward to getting associated with each other.”

Padmini and Aniksh got married on 23 feb 2010. It’s been 12 years of love, 5 years of marriage and a 2 year old toddler so far for this HK expat couple.

“It certainly helps to live abroad, specially the initial years of marriage. Coming from different backgrounds, living with big joint families in India can be overwhelming. But here in HK we have our own house rules. Rules that are practical and not traditional. Rules that are agreed upon by both of us and not by any specific culture or society. Marriage is a difficult institution and only love can make it beautiful.” says Padmini with conviction and content.

We have come quite far. I understand what she wants before she says. She understands what makes me unhappy before I mention it. We don’t give each other presents on the special days or celebrate Valentine’s day - it feels too unnatural to us.

We simply love each other. It’s more about the feelings and less about the things or words now. We are growing up in love :)

Article contributed by Padmini Pandit

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Love & Relationship

MRS. POONAM MEHTA

Share your love and relationship problems with her, she knows it all..

Aunty Poonam Mehta,

HK’s well-known Counsellor & our Columnist for Love & Relationships section.

— M. Ed. Guidance & Counseling, University of Newcastle Upon Tyne U K and Early Years Registered Educator in Hong Kong

If you wish to ask a question, please send it to adesiflava@gmail.com with subject line AUNTY MVP. We will maintain your identity anonymous on request.

Question 1: Hello Aunty, I’m a very regular reader of your section in the magazine. The first thing I do whenever I get a copy of Adesiflava is to flip the pages and get directly to the Aunty MVP section. The questions are quite interesting and your answers are also very logical. I’m a happy mom with 2 kids, I don’t wish to disclose my name so I’ll call myself Arpana (name changed). I live in Tung Chung and my husband is an IT professional with a leading international company.

I recently met this young guy living in the same building as mine.

He’s newly married and has recently come to Hong Kong with his beautiful wife. My husband and he have become close buddies due to their common passion for playing cricket and few other sports. I am getting quite attracted towards this guy and I think he also has feelings for me. I don’t wish to do anything wrong with my happy life and really love my husband and family, but somehow this attraction towards this guy is increasing day-byday and I need some help from you on how I can disconnect from this infatuation towards this guy. I can’t ask my husband to stop meeting this guy. Please suggest some way by which I can get out of this situation.

Answer 1 Dear Aparna, I am gratified to know you enjoy the column. Thank you. I am pleased you have taken the courage to get help. ‘Lust and aggression are often excluded from happy marriages’ Because of its unruly nature, lust is often perceived as a threat to the relationship’s stability. Thus, in order to keep marriages calm and predictable, many people channel their erotic passion into extramarital affairs.

Assess yourself, you are blessed with lovely children; wonderful husband who loves you furthermore, the family is financially stable.

What more do you wish to desire in your life? However, remember affairs carry a hefty price tag. Imagine how many lives will be ruined!

Cultivating both love and lustful desire towards your husband; and the need for stability, as well as that for adventure. This will help you to stay away from lustful thoughts for someone who is just an attraction nothing beyond.

In addition, you claim that your families have become close, how can you cheat on a young bride. If the man is showing interest in you perhaps he wants some attention from an older woman. Focus on your happy family and ignore him, he will get a message that you are a woman of integrity and very much happy in your marriage.

Sensual pleasures have the fleeting brilliance of a comet; a happy marriage has the tranquility of a lovely sunset.

Ann Landers

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Love & Relationship

Question 2: Hello Aunty, I need some serious help from you. I’m on the verge of losing my husband. I recently came to know from my best friend that she and my husband are having an affair from the past one year. My friend took the courage to confront to me as my husband has been failing to keep up to his promises made to her that my husband will leave me and my kids and will marry her.

I was very upset, devastated, and heartbroken and felt suicidal when I came to about this extra marital affair of my husband and best friend.

My friend has also shown me her whatsapp chats, videos, photos of her and my husband proving everything right as she claims.

My husband has accepted having relationship with her and they have also been physical many times. A lot of drama has happened recently and my 2 kids, who are not too young and can understand their mother’s dilemma, are also suffering. My husband has now agreed to completely stop meeting my friend and they both have accepted to end their relationship. I am not convinced at all, and I have a strong feeling that they both will still continue their extra marital affair after few days. I am making this claim based on their chats, videos and gifts exchanged with each other. Aunty I don’t want to break my family and also I can’t accept my husband having an affair with anyone. Please help me.

(Name of person and place is not disclosed on request) Answer 2 Dear Anonymous, I understand your trust in your husband has been shattered. You have seen pictures and read messages which must have stuck in your mind and haunting you. Since your husband has admitted to the affair and is sorry about what happened you can embark on the journey of healing and rebuilding the marriage. It is important that he acknowledges that he has wronged and that he repents of his actions and is ready to completely break off the relationship with this other woman.

The rebuilding relationship will require a focus on open communication, understanding, forgiveness and rebuilding trust.

Some of these aspects of the rebuilding process can take time and be difficult. It will require making a choice to forgive even if the feeling to forgive isn’t there. Renewing trust will take place one little step at a time.

A loving but tough confrontation not only will result in respecting yourself but will also cause your husband to respect you for how you are handling the situation. The confidence, inner strength and loving attitude that he will observe in you can reawaken the love and respect he once had for you thus making it more likely that it would put him on the path to return and no turning back.

Best wishes!

Question 3: Namaste Aunty, my name is Saluja from New Delhi, and I’ve recently moved to Hong Kong. I got a copy of Adesiflava magazine from the Kowloon Hindu Temple and I really enjoyed reading your section. I wanted to get some advice from you. My parents who live in New Delhi are in a very bad situation right now and their condition has been the same from the past 7 to 10 years now. My brother-in-law, Elder sister and her two kids have been living with my parents from the past many years now. My

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brother-in-law claims that he doesn’t earn much and his salary is only 20,000 rupees per month from the past 5 years, despite of working in a very reputed telecommunication company of India as a senior engineer.

My father has recently retired and to his misfortune he has not saved much as he has been spending lots and lots of money from the past many years on my elder sister, her kid’s education and basic necessities of home for the entire family which now includes my sister, her husband and kids. My father has to pay for every small thing which includes housing, electricity, my sister’s kid’s education, food and every small thing that you can’t imagine.

My parents have had many fights with my sister asking her to leave and make her husband understand the fact that he should look after his family and not my parents. My elder sister keeps saying the same old story that her husband doesn’t earn much, has been trying to look for a new and better job and her situation will improve and they will leave very soon to live an independent life. I have a strong feeling that my brother-in-law is lying about his salary, is saving his own money and has now become habituated and greedy. He wants to take every single penny of my parents and will never leave this free living zone for himself and his family.

My parents are also being emotionally blackmailed by my sister that she will commit suicide along with her kids if they pressurize her to leave from home. My parents are taking this guilt as they did an arrange marriage and found this guy for my sister. Aunty, can you give me some suggestion on how my parents can resolve this problem. In fact even I my personal life and family are getting stressed because of this situation. How should my parents resolve this problem?

Pratibha Sharma from Tsim Sha Tsui Answer 3.

Dear Pratibha, This appears to be a case of harassment, which can be reported.

First of all your parents need not live with this guilt that they are responsible for your sisters arranged marriage. Unless, she had wanted to marry someone she was in love then. Besides, she should be the one to fend for her old parents. It seems she and her husband are playing age long common practice of agitation in a very discreet manner.

However, Your sister’s threats are baseless, your parents should not carry any guilt for the daughter nor be intimidated by any suicidal threats.

Furthermore, They should sit down calmly and discuss the problem with the daughter if they are comfortable maybe offer a monthly financial support to her to rent out her own house.

Alternately they can warn her and her family to leave within a given time.

If the daughter still refuses to leave then they should lock her out and simultaneously file a police complaint and ask for police protection. There are laws in India for special protection of senior citizens.

Your parents must make a will and register it to protect the rights of the other children.

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Horoscope

ASTROLOGY BY BEJAN DARUWALLA FOR JUNE ARIES: A loads of goodies lands on your door: this is a great start to the period. There are freebies, gifts galore, romance, love, fame and fortune, renown, and creativity. This is great period to the start. What more do you want? Have fun.

LIBRA: There is money, love, home, family interactions, good friends and companions. The dice is in your favor and the cards auger well for you. This is a great period to be. There is love and intense bonding. Use your proverbial charm.

TAURUS: There are few roadblocks that hamper your movements but you will have to make do with what is at hand. There could be disappointments, snags, delays, a general slowdown, bickering, altercations and health issues. Look for compromises and slow down. Look at others’ points of views too.

SCORPIO: There could be some health issues; you may have to take the counsel of specialist. There are genuine spiritual and financial gains along with greater love and harmony. Ganesha blesses you. Do not be suspicious and revengeful.

SAGITTARIUS: The focus now is on renewed energy, vigor, enthusiasm and zest for life. There is money and honey, power, prestige, presence of mind, new openings and opportunities. Life is calling. Be ready for it. Lucky you!

GEMINI: The focus most definitely is on people.

There will be meets, collaborations, conferences, partnerships, journeys and communication. You will be networking in a frenzy and meeting people from all over. Group activity is best.

CAPRICORN: There is fun, entertainment, recreation, family bonding, food, fun and frolic. The joys of life are CANCER: This is a mixed bad, a period of strange spread out before you. Enjoy the repast. There is a contrasts. There is love, passion, romance, excitement, good chance of overindulgence. Let your heart win financial dealings, joint funds, loans and other fiscal over your mind. instruments. A lot is on your plate; you will have to find time for yourself. Ganesha watches over you.

AQUARIUS: There is rapid progress on all fronts, and many gains. Money, honey and the good life are yours LEO: The trend continues. Different concerns and to enjoy. This is party time; you let your hair down. pursuits take up your time. There is money in new There is new love and powerful bonding. Ganesha ventures and also spiritual and intellectual growth. smiles. Time to enjoy.

You are busy with wisdom, inspiration, your roots and ancestry, ceremonies, festivities and pilgrimages. PISCES: You are reaching out to everyone, making Watch your health. old contacts work for you, touching base, renewing relationships and powering your way to glory and VIRGO: Life moves in the direction you want it to. happiness. The focus is on the home and family, travel There are many changes taking place in your life now; and trips, weekends, a home – away – from – home there is professional success. You work and play and other goodies that add spice to life. hard and well. Ganesha ensures that you handle the roadblocks well.

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Horoscope

ASTROLOGY BY BEJAN DARUWALLA FOR JULY ARIES: Ganesha says there are many gains this fine month. Glamour, festivities, fun times, money, the realisation of hopes and wishes power you ahead. There is also socializing, entertaining and the enjoyment of true friendship. There could be love, romance, passion and great companionship.

children and creativity, hobbies, travel and journeys, ceremonies and celebrations. Ganesha sees to it that you are on top of the heap.

SCORPIO:- There may be health issues you need to deal with for both, yourself and your family. There could also be problems at work with colleagues and coTAURUS:- There is overall progress but it could workers. Ganesha asks you to firm up and meet the come with roadblocks. You work hard to get over the challenges head on. This will make you a better person. boulders; Ganesha gives you much needed strength.

There could be delays, expenses, travel, and health SAGITTARIUS:- You display hope, optimism, issues. You surmount it all. courage and determination to get where you want to. This is the week of love and hate and many new GEMINI:- This week could be a rollercoaster ride. bonds. New associations bring joy. You are enveloped You see many sides of life. Nothing comes easy, but by Ganeshaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grace. The year is ending well by all there is Ganeshaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grace and you zoom ahead. Health accounts. You look ahead with enthusiasm. gets better and there is more bonding at home. There are monetary gains.

CAPRICORN:- The focus is on inheritance and family issues. There will be money matters and health CANCER:-This is the time for acquisitions and problems that require thought and attention. You extravagance. There are many expenses. You may go will meet new people and make profitable contacts. overboard. Life is calling and you have to be ready for Beware of deceit. the dance. Ganesha watches over you as you indulge in luxury purchases.

AQUARIUS:- The highlight is travel, journeys, distant connections, pilgrimages, higher education, LEO:- You are filled with new ideas. You reach out to spirituality, tantra and mantra, research and new all. The main focus is on contacts, communications, skills. Vistas suddenly open up. Ganesha gives you contracts and gains. There are also fresh new an enjoyable time. techniques, skills and projects. You exhibit brilliance and manage to outshine your rivals.

PISCES:- There will be domestic issues and health problems to deal with. There will be rituals and VIRGO:- The highlight is on new work opportunities celebrations for the loving, the living and the dead. There and the domestic scene. Relatives, parents, in-laws is also prestige and power in this significant period. and guests drop by. The focus will shift to assets, CONTACT valuables and other domestic concerns. You look for BEJAN DARUWALLA money and honey, and possibly get both.

Phone: 00918141234275 LIBRA:- There are many irons in the fire. Good info@bejandaruwalla.com luck follows you like a hound. You are busy with www.bejandaruwalla.com

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SOUTH ASIAN FACES OF HK Page - 40

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OUR HEARTIEST CONGRATULATIONS TO

‘BE THE CHANGE’ CENTRE & AUNTY POONAM MEHTA FOR RECEIVING AN AWARD FROM SENIOR CITIZENS SAFETY HOME ASSOCIATION.

Aunty Poonam Mehta, 4th person from left.

HEARTIEST CONGRATULATIONS TO BUTTAR & ASSOCIATES AND MR.KULDEEP BUTTAR AND HIS TEAM FOR RECEIVING MOST VALUABLE SERVICES AWARDS IN 2015.

Mr. Buttar Romit Singh, Mr. Glenn Rogers, Mr. Buttar Kuldeep Singh and Mr. Randhawa Lal Singh receiving the Most Valuable Services Awards 2015 in Hong Kong, a prestigious award for recognizing the service provided by Buttar & Associates

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Ki ds Corner

Spot The 5 Differences In These Photos

There are 5 differences in the two photos shown above.

Please circle the 5 differences and send us a scanned copy, fax or a hard copy of this page to below address: A-Desiflava, 3D, 3rd Floor, Lyton Building, 36-38 Mody Road, Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon.

E-mail: info@adesiflava.com ; adesiflava@gmail.com Fax : +852-35911316 First 3 correct entries will each receive a Battlefield Hardline Gift Hampers by Electronic Arts. In each hamper bag, there will be one PS4 game copy, police badge and poster.

Winners of last issue, please claim your prizes directly from Aamchi Mumbai Restaurant. Tel:+852-35911315 Page - 42

WINNERS OF APRIL 2015 ISSUE Devansh Punjabi 7 Years Varun Jain 11 Years Mahak 12 Years www.adesiflava.com

Noodles Ki ds Corner

P R O N W V T S Q

N S W T Q R V O P

Q V T O S P R W N

R F E A T H

Don’t Look Yet! These Are the Sudoku Answers:

N – Noodles O – Orange P – Pepper Q – Quince R – Rice S – Squash – urkey – eggies – alnuts

W P R S N O Q T V

Quince

S T N W V Q P R O

Orange

Walnuts

V O Q R P T W N S

Squash

Squash

T Q S P R N O V W

Walnuts

Turkey

R N P V O W S Q T

Noodles

O W V Q T S N P R

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E H R T F A

A T F H E R

H E T R A F

F A H E R T

Rice

Veggies

T R A F H E

Solution

Father’s Day Sudoku

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North Point & Quarry Bay Tulsi Indian Restaurant Equals Opportunities Commission

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FREE CLASSIFIEDS AAMCHI MUMBAI RESTAURANT CLUB

is looking for experienced or fresh staff to work inside the bar of the Club.

FRESHERS AND PART-TIME STAFF IS ALSO WELCOME

AAMCHI MUMBAI RESTAURANT CLUB

in Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon is looking for full-time Indian chef to join on immediate basis. Salary will be as per market standards and additional bonuses and perks will be given. Interested candidates may send their CV to amc23631786@gmail.com or may call directly on 35911315 or 67446915

OFFICE/SHIPPING MANAGER REQUIREMENTS: • Proficient in I/E/ Shipping/PC Skills • Proficient in English & Cantonese • Proactive & Be able to work under pressure

RESPONSIBILITIES: Oversee daily orders/shipping/processes/administration Oversee & implement office processes & people management Pls. email full resume with current & expected salary to honey@inspire2aspire.org

E-COMMERCE ASSISTANT REQUIREMENTS: • Experience in e-commerce, web design, online marketing • MS Office, Chinese WP, HTML, Photoshop & Internet technology

RESPONSIBILITIES: • Manage corporate retail website, increase market share, sales revenue & profits • Implement effective online marketing campaigns/promotions • Manage product listings, market research, product description & pricing.

Pls. email full resume with current & expected salary to honey@ inspire2aspire.org If you wish to submit your free classified ads, please send email to adesiflava@gmail.com with subject line as 'Free Classified'

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Ki ds Corner

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HK$85 MON-FRIDAY SVC. CHARGE EXTRA

HK$120 WEEKENDS SVC. CHARGE EXTRA

TIMING: 12.00PM TO 3.00PM

STIR FRIED CHINESE GREENS

APPETIZERS:

LEMON GRASS CHICKEN

MULTI - Spring Rolls (Veg) KOREAN - Cheese Balls (Khamja Rolls) INDIAN - 7 Chicken Barra Kebab, Jaipuri Fish Finger

SOUPS: MULTI - Brokley Soup/Corn Soup KOREAN - Kimchi Soup (Shrimp / Pork)

MAINS: 1. THAI - Seasonal vegetables (An Assortment of garden fresh vegetables cooked in coconut base gravy, Thai Style) 2. KOREAN - Stir fried chinese greens (Quick stirs fried combination of Pokchoy, chinese cabbage and seasonal vegetables with fried garlic) 3. KOREAN - Steam/Fried Fish (Without garlic, haggis or black bean sauce) 4. KOREAN - Lemon Grass Chicken (Stir fried crispy lemon grass chicken supreme with chinese vegetables) 5. THAI - Green/red/yellow curry (veg or Non-veg as per chef’s choice) 6. INDIAN - Kachi mirchi ka korma (veg or non-veg as per chef’s choice) 7. INDIAN - Dal Basmati/Dal Banjara/Dal Amritsari 8. INDIAN - Khumbh Hara Pyaz Jaykedar (mushroom green onion curry) 9. INDIAN - Shahi Shabnam Curry (Mughlai style rich curry saunce)

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RICE:

Steam Rice Fried Rice Nesi Gorang (Veg)

BREADS: Mini Naan (Plain)

DESERTS:

(1 Desert) Korean Candy Indian Rice Pudding Shahi Tukda (Bread flavored with saffron milk) Moong Dal Halwa

KACHI MIRCHI KA KORMA

3 Floor, Lyton Building, 36-38 Mody Road, Tsim Sha Tsui Kowloon, Hong Kong

TEL: 852-3591-1315 THE ROWDY TASTE OF INDIA

www.aamchimumbaihk.com

www.adesiflava.com All items will be prepared as per chef's choice and will be served as buffet arrangement only.