Adonai Magazine (Husbands Open Up) by Adonai Magazine

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Husbands, Open Up have counseled many couples where the husband refused to open up and talk to his wife. Over the years, I've encountered a number of reasons why this kind of situation arises in a marriage. Some men have unhealed wounds in their past. These hurts cause them to be emotionally guarded and withdrawn. At other times, a wife with a sharp tongue keeps a husband from being vulnerable. He's afraid she'll

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True strength is displayed in the courage to open up. There's no bravery in hiding thoughts or feelings in fear.

use what he says as a weapon against him.

And some men are just naturally quiet. It's part of

their personality. When you combine this kind of man with a wife who really needs his conversation, that marriage is going to have its challenges. Regardless of the reason, one of the worst forms of abuse for a woman is silence from her husband. I've had wives in my oﬃce beg and plead for their husbands to talk…while the men just sat quietly, stone-faced, refusing to open up. I'll be direct: Husbands, you have to open up and talk honestly with your wife-regardless of what past hurt, present hesitation, or personality quirk is holding you back. COVER PHOTO

She needs this interaction and so do you. If she has harmed you in some way, forgive her. If she is less than careful with her words, tell her about it. Confront her if she struggles to speak kindly, but do not withdraw from her. For the sake of your own marriage and your own personal health, you need to find a way to work past what keeps you from communicating honestly with your wife. Men who internalize their problems and don't talk about them have a greater incidence of heart problems, alcoholism, and stress. A lack of honesty and openness about feelings and problems is the root of addictive behavior-addiction to alcohol, pornography, gambling, and a number of other serious issues. You call yourself the strong, silent type? You're wrong, because true strength is displayed in the courage to open up. There's no bravery in hiding thoughts or feelings in fear. If you are the type of person who is naturally silent, then make yourself open up and start communicating. Get in touch with your own feelings and begin to express them openly. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you learn to communicate and to give you the courage to change. He will answer your requests, because He is interested in you and your marriage. Proverbs 12:18 says, "Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Husbands and wives: don't be reckless with your words, but understand that healing begins when you can open up and communicate with your spouse.

PASTOR JOSEPH O. B. SARPONG Henry Ayensu

Franklin Kwaku Kyei Pas. Abraham Obadare Dr. Myles E. Munroe

Joyce Meyer Dr. Ralph F. Wilson Jimmy Evans Dr. William D. Watley Dr. Kelafo Collie M.D. Elsie Osae-Kwapong Rev. Nick Anane-Agyei Cre8ive House

Publisher

Editor-In-Chief

Columnist

Columnist Columnist Columnist Columnist Columnist Advertising Manager Spiritual Advisor Graphic Design

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The name Adonai is translated Lord in the Bible. Adon means, “steward administrator, master, or Lord.” The addition of ai to adon intensifies or elevates its meaning, changing it to mean “the ultimate Lord, the Supreme Lord, or Lord of all.” The vision of Adonai Magazine goes beyond denominational, traditional, ethnic and cultural barriers that are sometimes imposed and have interfered with the Lord’s vision for an international kingdom building.

Deadline for placing adverts in the next issue is the 20th day of the month

DisclaimerAdonai is published once a month by Cre8ive House Inc. No part of this publication is to be reproduced without the written permission of the publisher. The Magazine can not be held liable for any error in any advertisement and any liability is limited to the total cost of the advertisement in error. The publisher however reserves the right to refuse any advertisement deemed offensive or inappropriate.

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Franklin K. Kyei

Editor of the Adonai Magazine Send your letters and suggestions to the editor at editor@adonaimag.tv or call: 347 449 5892

Rejection In The House – Part 2 visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

The way and manner some of us go for our fallen brethren’s jugular sometimes make the devil look like a Sunday school teacher. We thus end up doing more damage to our own, than what their shortfalls do; making their recovery and restoration either delayed or near-impossible. We are quick to quote 1Corinthians 5, overlooking the fact that the issue came to a restorative conclusion in 2Corinthians 2:1-11. We wander all over the place crossing oceans and walking on thorns to save sinners in the byways and highways; only to dump the saved children of God at the least sign of failure, without any meaningful eﬀort or measures to help restore them into sound spiritual health, and fellowship. If God is going to count iniquity how many of us would stand (Psalm 130:3)? This is not a call to condone or excuse any waywardness in the Church of God. It is rather an attempt to expose the ignorance, irresponsibility, heartlessness, and hypocrisy that has contributed to the fall and loss of many wounded brothers and sisters. They could have been restored in a short period of time to their former states and levels of fruitfulness in the Lord, if we had sacrificed a little bit of our holierthan-Jesus attitudes. Discipline for the wayward, we must not shrink from; but love, compassion, and recovery measures, we must never also fail to oﬀer; because the parable of the lost sheep is as good and applicable to the weak and fallen child of God in the church, as it is to the sinner in the street (Luke 15:4). Scripture makes it plain that it is those who persist in sin (especially in false doctrines or heresy), and refuse to correct their ways that need to experience continuous sanctioning, after we have done all we could to help them overcome their weaknesses or waywardness (Titus 3:10; 2 Timothy 4:1-2). Even then, scripture says the intent should be to facilitate eventual restoration (2Thessalonians 3:14-15). Scripture nowhere rec6

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ommends prolonged sanctioning for those who demonstrate genuine and fruitful repentance. Such an approach gives an advantage to the devil to achieve his desire on the target; a development the church is expected to know better than permit (2 Corinth 2:11). In scripture the demonstration of genuine repentance before God has always been the end of divine anger and rejection. Even the worst King of Israel, Manasseh, was shown mercy by God and restored to the throne when he repented of his evil ways (2Chronicles 33:120. All that some of us know, however, is casting out, and casting away our weaker and fallen brethren with sanctions; leaving no room for restoration upon their repentance. It is no wonder David said, “let me fall into the hand of God for great are His mercies; but let me not fall into the hand of man (1Chronicles 21:13)”. We are quick to judge and condemn, but unwilling, slow, and even deficient, in providing the much needed forgiving and caring environment that facilitates restoration. When Jesus saw the crisis that was about to engulf Peter, He prayed for His recovery. He even went further to send Peter a special invitation on the resurrection morning, so that the repentant brother, whose spirit was battered, shamed, broken and humbled, would feel loved and welcome at the throne of mercy again (Luke 22:31-32). If the armies of the world would not abandon their own when they are wounded in battle, then the Church of God ought to do better; because our savior is a Lord who encourages the undeserving to come to the throne of grace, to receive mercy and grace in time of need. Thus, signaling to His followers that in judgment, we should remember mercy. God delights in discipline that is coupled with love and grace, to eﬀect restoration, for that is the story of Calvary; where Jesus looked beyond our faults and saw our needs.

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Dr. Myles Munroe

For Books or Teachings by Dr. Myles Munroe on CD, audio or video tapes, call or visit us at: Bahamas Faith Ministries International. The Diplomat Center, Carmichael Road. P.O.Box N-9583, Nassau, Bahamas Tel: (242) 341 – 6444. Fax: (242) 361 2260

“The Treasure Within” visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

When we think of treasure, we think of something

there. His responsibility, along with your cooperation,

that is rare. Treasure also implies that something is

is to see that the treasure comes out. Secondly, the

valuable. Treasure is usually something that is of such

treasure that you have does not belong to you. It came

value that it is worth looking for. The Scripture states,

from God (2 Cor 4:7).

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that

We do not know who the people around

this all-surpassing power is from God and not from

us truly are. We do not fully know anyone. We really

us” (2 Cor 4:7). God says that His treasure is within

do not know what treasure lies within a person.

the people around us. The people around us might

Treasure has to be sought in order to be

not be rare, but what they have within them is. That is

found. The treasure is inside you. Therefore, in order

why we should never make the people around us feel

to appreciate the real you, I first have to realize that

common because there is something within them

there are things about you that I do not know. Sec-

that makes them uncommon.

ondly, I have to take the time to sit down and dig

Treasure is also used to describe some-

deeply. You cannot find the treasure in a person by

thing that is hidden from normal view. This implies

casual encounters. You have to build deeper relation-

that when I meet you for the first time, I really do not

ships.

know your worth. I have heard stories from various

Consider the treasure hidden in God. If

sources about people who mistakenly threw away

you would have met God before He created every-

treasure because they did not know that item’s worth.

thing, you would have encountered everything be-

Unfortunately, we sometimes do that with humans.

cause everything that exists, first existed in God.

We throw people away without knowing their true

Therefore, when you met God, you would have en-

value. You never know what is hidden in a person.

countered everything and would not have known it.

Therefore, we always have to remember

How sad it would be to insult everything! That same

the principles from 2 Corinthians 4:7. The first being:

God has planted treasure in every human being. It

there is value hidden in something that does not look

does not matter what people look like. God has

too valuable. Scripture states, “…treasure in jars of

planted something in every human being that is His,

clay…” Clay is dirt. You may not look impressive, but

and He wants us to expose what He has placed within

inside of you is God’s personal treasure. He put it

us.

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Pas. Abraham Obadare

To contact Pastor Abraham Obadare, the pastor of CACWOSEM in Queens, N.Y., please call 718-6588981 for prayers and other needs. He has just released the 2nd edition of his book titled “Chosen But Naughty.” To obtain your copy, please visit www.eagernessofgod.org/store. You may also listen to him on this website for 24/7 gospel radio messages.

What I say in times of Need visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

sually during marriage counseling, one of the first set of questions I ask couples-to-be is the reason they are choosing each other as opposed to other persons. I always want to find out the major reason, apart from being just a male or female who is good looking and fits in, because one is of marriageable age. I ask this question in order to help them focus on that reason as a center base of their union. This center base will always help them in the future when difficulties arise. It will assist them to stay together in spite of all odds. So we can apply this to the scripture in Romans 8:35, where Apostle Paul said nothing would separate him from the love of Christ. I believe he was the right man to make such a statement. He went through so many ordeals, but stayed true to Christ, his love. The question I have for you now is, “can we also make this statement? Why was he able to make the statement? It is because he realized the love Christ has for him. That is why he said in Rom. 5:6-8 that it was Christ who first loves us. Realizing that God’s unconditional love was available for him, he also made up his mind not to allow any difficulty to drag him away from that love. David, in loneliness, said “My heart is smitten down, and withered like grass. I am even as a sparrow that sitteth alone on the housetop” —Psalm 102:4, 6. In Psalm 78:18 he said, “My lovers and friends hast Thou put away from me, and hid mine acquaintance out of my sight.” Further in Psalm 142:4, 5 he said, “I looked on my right hand, and saw there was no man that would know me. I had no place to flee unto, and no man cared for my soul. I cried unto Thee, O Lord, and said, Thou art my Hope. When my spirit was in heaviness, then Thou knewest my path.” All theses are indications of troubles that Christians

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experience in life, but the state of our hearts will determine what we resolve in our hearts during those difficult periods. David made a determination and concluded that, “Gracious is the Lord, and righteous, yea, our God is merciful. I was in misery, and He helped me.” Psalm 116:5, It is my prayer that you are strongly in love with Jesus enough for you to be able to sing, “Nearer my Lord to thee, nearer to thee …” even in your times of trouble. I pray that God will give you strength to keep loving Him, even when going through hard times. Job said he would keep trusting God even at the point death – Job 13:15 Jesus said, “thy will be done” – Mat 6:42 Ask God to help you have a very strong love for Him so that troubles will not separate you from Him. Those who came before us were victorious over the troubles of life. We shall also be victorious in Jesus name. Pressure separated Saul and he became rejected; Unfaithfulness separated Ananias and Saphira and they were killed. Please be not separated from the love of God. The person who separates is the one who ends up loosing. May the Lord give you victory over all troubles that could move you from Him. - Pastor Abraham Obadare, a minister of the gospel at Christ Apostolic Church of America, Inc. You are welcome to worship with us at 108-02 Sutphin Blvd., Jamaica, NY 11435. You may also keep with us on 24 hours internet radio at www.eagernessofgod.org. Website - www.wosem.org – for videos, live streaming and past messages / articles.

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We give thanks to God for what He is doing with our publication, Adonai Magazine. We also give thanks to God for you, our readers, for your enthusiastic patronage of the publication this far. Even though we knew the Lord was capable and willing to do what He put into our Spirits concerning the publication, we did not expect it to become such a wonderful sought-after Christian Magazine, with a distribution network that encompasses more than 10 states, with more than 30,000 copies every month. Part of what the Lord put in our hearts at the beginning of the ministry was a television network that would promote the work of God in its various dimensions. We did not realize the possibilities until lately, when the Lord provided the means for us to initiate the project. We have, by God’s grace, taken oﬀ smoothly under the name, ADONAI TV. We have so far had several informative pastoral interviews, which can be accessed by our readers after we oﬃcially launch our newly designed website, which is still under construction.

We would never have been able to come this far without the patronage and participation of our readers. That is why we are coming to you with this humble appeal for help and donations, to build and equip our studio; which is already on the drawing board. We are appealing to you for financial help, because as you can all attest to, our publication is given away free of charge. We make no profits out of it. We, even on several occasions, have had to make up the payments with our personal funds, because the advertising fees collected are not enough to cover the press, mailing, and distribution charges. We would, therefore, appreciate it if you would partner with us through your financial donations to make Adonai TV a reality. You can make donations online at Paypal: (donations@adonaimag.tv). You can make your check or money order donations payable to ADONAI and mail it to ADONAI MEDIA MINISTRY 3870 WHITE PLAINS ROAD. 2ND FLOOR BRONX, NY 10467 Waiting to hear from you.

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Joyce Meyer

For more on this topic, order Joyce’s four-CD series Knowing God. You can also contact us to receive our free magazine, Enjoying Everyday Life, by calling (800) 727-9673 or visiting www.joycemeyer.org. Ladies, join Joyce at her Love Life Women’s Conference September 15-17, 2011 in St. Louis, MO. For more information, go to www.joycemeyer.org/lovelife11.

Knowing God: Why Some People Get It and Some Don’t visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

love what Paul prays in Ephesians 1:17 (AMP): “[For I always pray to] the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, that He may grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation [of insight into mysteries and secrets] in the [deep and intimate] knowledge of Him.” Having a revelation of God and His work in your life is the only way to understand Him. That’s why it’s so important to pray for God to reveal Himself to people—it’s something only He can do. We cannot reveal God to others. We can witness and talk of His love and good works, but people can’t understand spiritual things unless their spirit is alive. I go through interviews all the time. Some of them are Christian, some are not. And people always want to know what the “phenomenon” is—why do people listen to my messages and come to our conferences? I used to try so hard to make them understand it. I wanted them to see that it’s really not me, or my books, or my preaching. Interview after interview I tried to make them get it that it’s God working through me. After years of these discussions and trying to convince people, I finally get it. I get that they don’t get it. Some people can’t understand what I mean, no matter how many ways I say it, and I understand why: They don’t understand because they haven’t had a revelation of God. Now this applies to so much more than interviews, and it’s helped me understand a better way to witness to other people. Everything spiritual has a practical side, and I think that’s one of the biggest things we’ve missed. We try to tell people cloud-floating spiritual things, but then we don’t bring it down to a practical level where they can do something with it in their everyday lives. God has shown me through the years that we need to know who God is and experience His love for us. He wants us to know that no matter what we do or say, He will always love us. But to understand this part of God, we have to have a revelation, not just information or head knowledge. Actually, head knowledge alone is usually what gets in the way of our faith and trust in God. And if information never turns into revelation, it won’t do you any good.

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Revelation goes beyond the mental, feeling or seeing realm and knows that God is. It’s so important to know God through revelation and not just head knowledge or with your feelings, because what we think and feel change easily and this can deceive us. When this happens, if we don’t feel warm and joyful, we think God has left us. When we encounter a trial or tribulation, we wonder if God loves us. If God delays an answer to our prayer, we wonder where He is and why He’s not working. John 14:17 (AMP) says, “The Spirit of Truth, Whom the world cannot receive (welcome, take to its heart), because it does not see Him or know and recognize Him. But you know and recognize Him, for He lives with you [constantly] and will be in you.” It’s impossible to know God except by revelation because He’s a Spirit and your mind cannot know Him. You can know about God with your mind, but what you know about Him spiritually is not something you can explain. You just know. God has given all of us a measure of revelation, but not everyone understands it. That’s what makes sharing the Gospel diﬃcult sometimes, but don’t ever get mad at someone because they don’t get it. To people who have never had a revelation of who God is, you might as well be speaking a foreign language. In the meantime, try to meet them where they are without compromising who you are in Christ. We need to be careful not to pressure people when we witness to them – or pressure ourselves to do it. It’s so important to be led by the Holy Spirit when we share the Gospel with people because He knows just what we need to say and what they are ready to hear. When God gives you an opportunity to share about Jesus, do it with a sweet, patient spirit, but the minute any tension rises, take a step back and get out of the situation. Instead, pray for those people to have “a spirit of wisdom and revelation” because when God shows them the truth, it will be clear to them what they need. Then they will finally get it, and I love to watch what happens when they do.

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SKIP HEITZIG

Skip Heitzig is the founder and senior pastor at Calvary of Albuquerque in New Mexico. His teachings are heard across the country and around the world on The Connection. For more information on Skip, visithttp://www.connectionradio.org. visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

Salad Bar Spirituality

henever people reject the authentic, they're open to anything and everything. Today's spirituality is generic. I call it a "salad bar" spirituality. The attitude is, "I'll have a small order of Christianity--I like that "judge not" part and the Golden Rule, but cut out all the rest--add a little Hinduism and some Buddhism, maybe some New-Age spices..." If you have that kind of mentality, a lot of people will arise to serve it up. But does everyone who claims to speak for God actually speak for God? No! In Matthew 7:15, we're warned to beware of false prophets. When you decide to go through the narrow gate, you'll find some hanging out by the gate who want to widen it. They don't agree that there's only one way to get to the Kingdom, through that narrow gate. Who are they? They're fake sheep. They look like sheep, but inwardly, Jesus said, they're wolves.

Even under the umbrella of Christianity, the lines of truth are getting fuzzier. Some years ago, the World Council of Churches sponsored a symposium of 25 theologians who came up with a document that included this statement: "We find ourselves recognizing a need to move beyond a theology which confines salvation to the explicit personal commitment to Jesus Christ." That is helping pave the way for the compromise of truth. You don't have to look for the wolves; they'll come 16

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to you. And they'll be beautifully disguised. They'll seem sincere and good, and they'll seem to love. But don't be swayed by someone's charm or education, or even by signs. Lift up the fleece and see the wolf underneath. Here are some good tests for finding the wolves: Their character: When the Holy Spirit comes into a person He starts changing that person, and it will be evident. Look for the fruit of the Spirit, found in Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, longsuďŹ&#x20AC;ering, etc. These will be lacking in those who are false. Their creed: That means what they say about God. The creed of false prophets is that there is no narrow gate, that there are many ways to God. They'll deny the essentials of the historic Christian church, and they'll attack the person and work of Christ. You should follow the example of the Bereans in Acts 17:11. The Bereans didn't accept even Paul's word, but they "searched the scriptures daily to find out whether these things were so." Doctrine matters! Their converts: Watch the eďŹ&#x20AC;ect of the teaching that is being disseminated in the lives of those who are receiving it. It's not always readily apparent, but it will eventually erode their spiritual walk. So stay in the Word, listen with discernment, don't be fooled by sheep costumes, and stay away from that spiritual salad bar! Scripture Of The Day: "If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit." - Galatians 5:25 (NKJV)

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Elsie Osae-Kwapong

Email Auntie Elsie at elsie@adonaimag.tv Tel: 347 449 5892 visit www.adonaimag.tv for more articles

Tips for Sunday School Teachers

Know how to lead a class successfully "study to show yourself approved.

Your attitude determines your atmosphere. Children will pick up on the attitude of the teacher. If the teacher is irritated or frustrated the children will follow that attitude and you will observe those attitudes beginning to surface in the children as well. I suggest that anyone who works with or teaches children periodically review their attitude.

Keep in mind that there will always be that one or two who will be a challenge to work with, and those are the ones that need your understanding and patience the most.

If you seem to be having a challenge keeping control of the whole group then you may want to look at what you are teaching and how you are presenting it. Most of the time if there is consistent bad behavior from the group as a whole it is because they are bored. When any subject is taught at its best, young children will be curious, interested, and motivated to learn. The scripture verifies this philosophy in Proverbs 15:2 (from the Living Bible). It reads, “A wise teacher makes learning a joy.” A wise teacher will always strive to do the following:

Listen and Observe

Did anyone ever tell you that God gave us two ears and one mouth because He wanted us to listen twice as much as we talk? I think there is much truth to that. When you take the time to stop, watch, and listen to the children you will learn how they perceive their world. You will discover what is important and interesting to them, and you will show them that you are interested in them. Through listening you can learn a lot 18

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about the children you teach. You will hear the words they use and what they like and don’t like. You will be able to find out what they understand or do not understand. It is more important to listen past the words to what they are feeling inside.

Find ways to relate to them

You will discover that spending time talking to or playing with them is enjoyable, and it provides a relaxed environment for them to openly communicate with you. It will provide an opportunity to build relationships. Spending time with and interacting with the children during “Free Time” before and after service will help you to develop a relationship of trust between them and you.

Show Respect

Show that you respect them by saying please and thank you when you communicate with them. Do your best to speak in a calm, patient tone even when you need to be firm in your communication. Teach good manners by setting the example. Focus on them and listen to them when they are sharing something with you. Make what is important to them… important to you.

Remember that actions speak louder than words. Statistics prove that 55% of what we

communicate comes from the way we look/act. (Body language, gestures, and facial expressions) The more you can communicate on the same level as the child the more effective you will be in keeping their attention. For example, when you first greet the smaller children as they arrive, kneel down to give a hug and say hello on an eye to eye level, this will leave a much bigger impact on them than simply yelling “Hi, welcome” from across the room, (as you hurry around to get your lesson ready).

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