"Hidden Among the Leaves"

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“Hidden among ! leav"“ Sho # $o%" and b%ef not" on ! nature of being. E&ays of 'i%tual significance and insight. -T. Saw
Copyright © Bjorn Saw 2022

Ghost hunt.

My friend said it best, that this moment as it is, is it. He said it not as a reductive reasoning, submitting to the undeniable truth that there is no other time than now, but he said it in an emphatic tone with a sense of freedom that gave away his inner experience. It jolted me inside as it was a deep recognition of something so natural, so normal, that most of us miss it every day. Even the most sincere spiritual aspirants pass it over in a glance. Too subtle, too fine to register on our radar we instead insist to pursue a ghost that will never be caught. Now I do not advocate giving up seeking after Truth Absolute at all, to simply resign yourself to the present moment with all its inner and outer turmoil, but I do ask for more diligence and discrimination in the review of our present moment, of our present state of mind. If there is a solution to be found it is right here, in our own headspace right now and not simply as a takeoff point but as a final destination of which all other questions will be subject to. This, mind you, is not an ‘advaita shuffle’ where all your questions are rendered null and void in favour of an empty no-mind space a la Zen, but more explicitly becomes a fertile ground upon which all things can be seen as they are and the appropriate action needed become clear. Argumentation and even the urge to engage in debate over these matters will come to naught. The futility of trying to solve with the mind an issue that is right before you, will become evident and you’ll withdraw as not to betray the beauty your present being contain. A zen priest put it nicely, after having had to listen to a visitors rant about this and that, he said; “please do not walk around with your dirty shoes inside my brain”. Philosophy and the pursuit of freedom must always remain within the framework of our present conscious position. When we pass over this salient point we miss the very subtle seed in ourselves that knows freedom. My friend had expressed this inner knowing and it sparked the recognition in my heart instantly. So utterly hidden no one seemed to notice. The mind will never touch this space, yet it is hidden within mind itself. No wonder you can’t see it, you’re looking out from it. That’s why the sage fell silent upon hearing your pleas, drawing you back inside yourself. Or he’d hit you with his stick if he’s of that disposition. Silence here is not the solution but simply the means to stop a churning mind. So let not silence be a cover up for ignorance but go deeper. Penetrate and break open the innermost space you contain and find a freedom unassailable. Once awakened you’ll never go wrong again as it has its own ears and eyes. Whenever you see or hear truth your heart will jump in delight.

In the beginning.

I thought; the word ‘God’ must mean and point to that which contain all other things. If the word ‘God’ denotes that which encompasses all things and by which all things come into being (being created), then no other word can challenge it for supremacy. I mean, the word ‘God’ (or its equivalent in any other language) then is pointing to a supreme truth that within it would contain all other words.

I was looking for the biggest possible word that would describe our existence in its fullest. I was in my early teens and I pondered these things in my free time. I wanted to make sense out of my experience and enjoyed questioning things almost as laying a puzzle, sorting things out in order to understand the larger picture. There are many superlatives describing our space/time continuum and life as we know it. But the word ‘Universe’ capture them all; a large word that contain within itself everything we know and can imagine. In my mind the only word that could contain the universe was ‘God’. So now if all words point to the meaning they represent so must the word ‘God’ I thought. Unless, there is no God? Yes I was a sceptic back then but I couldn’t outright dismiss the notion of God or that which the word represented; an absolute truth that would by its very nature contain all there is simply by its own definition. So the question arose, if it is true then what? I couldn’t easily ignore thousands of years of history, hundreds of cultures, manifold religions and countless personal testimonies of the validity of ‘God’. I needed to find out. Using only the word to guide me in my investigation I proceeded.

If God contained all things and nothing could exist outside of God, then I must by default exist within God. And if I exist within God, no part of me could be exempt, neither body nor mind. Every single cell of my being must be 100% God, it follows reason. And if every little thing of me is God, even I must be God, since nothing, absolutely nothing, inside or outside could be anything but God. So went my inquiry. I was quite pleased with myself. But it did bring clarity in the sense that which I was looking for was not to be found outside of myself. I had always wanted to know the truth ever since I can remember and now I knew it lay within. This was doubtless and as I came of age my assertiveness would upset some Christian friends of mine. Still, I was just starting out. Beginners confidence I’d call it.

A different perspective.

With spiritual insight comes a new vision. We come to see things anew from a different point of view. This perspective is the complete opposite of the usual normal outlook most of us have. It’s not that our eyes nor its objects have changed but it is wherefrom we look that have changed. The identity with which we used to frame our picture from is gone. The source of vision is no longer you. You have disappeared and there’s only seeing. Usually everybody attaches seeing and its properties to themselves. They personalise seeing and overlay it with their own conclusions and likes and dislikes. But once we have had a penetrating spiritual insight we loose the agent that is watching. The ‘I’ disappears and your vision becomes unclouded by your personal identity. We suddenly see clearly. We ‘wake’ up to the true nature of who we are. It’s as if you’ve blown a hole wide open in the back of your head and there’s only empty space when you turn your gaze around and look within. I describe my own experience as my vision comes from far behind my head, as far as the universe is deep, and goes through my eyes out into the world. This perspective is a wide open experience of sight. It’s no longer framed by anything and my physical eyes are no longer reference points. I can see from any part of my body, I can see from my heart or my head, I can close my eyes and still see. Vision is nondirectional unless I direct it in one way or other. I can see ‘out’ into this world or I can see ‘in’ into my true Being that lies just behind my eyes yet encompasses the whole universe. So when I look into this world I do so from outside of it. This whole universe I find, is within me. Yet when I play with directions in and out cancel each other out and there’s only no point of reference and I’m left with wide open empty space. Why is this helpful and important? Because it changes the way you view things. You no longer assess things according to how you feel or think. Since there’s no obstruction from an agent you can see objectively. Seeing things clearly you don’t personalise your experience. Zen calls it simply ‘seeing things as they are’. Now if we don’t see eye to eye we are bound to clash with opposing viewpoints. These are not two differing opinions but two altogether different ways of seeing. One is relative and one is absolute. One is personal and one is universal. The spiritual view is the greater and can accommodate the worldly view yet the personal worldly view can’t accommodate the larger perspective. That’s why there has to be a shift, from the limited to the infinite. And that’s why it always will be a challenge to the personal sense of self. But this is what any spiritual aspirant and seeker are looking for. A complete transformation of their outlook. A radical shift in perspective. A change of heart.

An Enlightened Heart.

Bodhicitta - the awakened heart of compassion and care. When you realise you’re not alone; you are in fact, the other. Not only are you every other person but you exist in all forms of nature, in all of the elements and in all living species. Not as a part, but as a whole. When you wake up to this nondifferentiation you’ll see no separation and you’ll realise that everyone and everything is already there; awake and free just as they are. That’s what the Buddha meant when saying: “However many beings there are in whatever realms of being might exist … in the realm of complete nirvana I shall liberate them all. And though I thus liberate countless beings, not a single being is liberated”.

Because once liberated oneself you realise that all are inherently free already and therefore you will treat all beings accordingly. Then by your very behaviour you will make no distinction between bound and unbound and that will serve as the point of release for those still struggling to be free. Your example will stand as the guarantor for all who doubt. All the Buddhas, enlightened beings, Saints and sages of the past, all guarantee your own inherent liberation from misguided views; ignorance, hatred and desire. The delusion of your mind is freed by the awakening of your heart. The spell of the illusion of separation is broken by the bodhicitta - the awakened heart. That means your awakening is everyone’s awakening. You can’t set yourself apart. So seeing billions of other people all equally sharing your inner freedom, you’ll find recourse in their transparency and learn all there is to learn about our human nature; of our frailties and of our strengths. This change can be easily accessed by shifting your identity into the other; see yourself as the other person completely and without compromise. You can do this with as many people as you like and you can do it with animals and nature alike. To look out through other peoples eyes you’ll see what they see and hear what they hear. Nothing is hidden, all is revealed. Everything become transparent and self evident; in oneself and in the other and we come to partake in the human drama as one human being and so we complete each other. The thousand armed bodhisattva can be seen as this manifestation of the whole of humanity, serving every possible need for mankind. Kannon’s arms and eyes do reflect the unlimited ways and infinite potential of a liberated one, of the awakened One.

Why Christ Matters.

Even before birth, still in the womb, like now, we can hear of the promise inherent, just as the Magi did, riding in from the east, having foreseen this massive event. They followed their prophesies and their hearts instincts. Even today, in the East, people anticipate holy men and women to be born. Saviours and Avatars, realised beings from birth, catching a glimpse of whom is enough to catapult you into ecstasy and bliss. This is no joke. This happens still today. Even hearing about such an event can be enough to create faith in you. It’s not superstition nor phantasy but yes quite rare. To relive such an occasion can bring about similar reactions simply because the inherent truth is timeless and does not expire simply because of time’s passing. So the birth of Christ is as poignant today as it ever was. Just as we can allow for a recognition that the Big Bang itself, the very spark and birth of our universe can be experienced within our own heart and soul today by following the science. Sounds far out, yes it is but it’s still true and possible. And like science, Faith needs proof for its existence. That’s why the Magi went on a journey to see him with their own eyes. But also to give thanks and honour as they held no doubt over what they would find. Merry Christmas All and happy journeying.

Always look at the Heart.

It’s never personal. The beauty with the Truth is that there is never a moment without it. The Dharma is always present as the complete experience. Even the most intimate personal relationship is never seen in isolation, it always exists within the greater experience of Truth. Why is this so great? Because of this we can always clear up difficulties, we can always see a way forward. One of the reasons a Sage would be quiet and the Saint fall silent would be because we’re not able to see the Truth that is literally staring us in the face. We can understand their dilemma as we know they’d love to share their knowledge. Somehow people have gotten the idea that the Sages are silent because Truth can’t be expressed or spoken, which is a ludicrous idea. Of course it can be spoken and expressed, in everything we say and do. If it couldn’t it would be pretty useless. We can relate to their silence though, as we all have at one time or another, come home after discovering something new and being excited to share it with our loved ones, just to have it fall on deaf ears. They simply can’t see what you see. Maybe they are not

interested enough? Nevertheless they can’t grasp what you’re trying to convey. I know for myself, returning from Asia with a newfound love for Truth and with a passion to share it. Why some would ask? Partly because it’s too good not to, but mainly because it is so rare and it is what is needed to realise Life in the fullest. It is what is needed to live an awakened life especially if you’re supposed to share this life with another. When the initial excitement is met with indifference and blank stares one become hesitant to share it indiscriminately. So the Sages sit silent, waiting patiently for you to pick up the courage to ask them about it. They’ve been disillusioned before so don’t waste their time. Be sincere. Look and listen. The Truth will do set you free.

Maha Purusha

I asked Swami Brahmananda in his small room in the Shivananda Ashram in Rishikesh, about the Purusha; the one single Being that is seen as the template for human beings according to Hindu scriptures. Whom I had seen earlier strewn across the sky with arms and legs just like us. He leaned forward and asked, “Did you see him?” as to make sure he had heard me right. -Yes I had seen Him, and I saw us, people, as pieces of scattered broken glass all reflecting Him alone. He, the only person, spanned the universe with his body, mysteriously quiet like in transition from one world to another. I have no memory of how and when I had this vision, but it was as clear and profound as the scriptures make out. I believe I was standing watching the cloudless night-sky high up in the Himalayas, the stars out in their millions when his body filled the galaxy, slowly drifting across the firmament. What is its significance? To see that God himself have form, a body like ours (or rather we have a body like his) once again reiterates the illusion of separation we may entertain. We are but countless manifestations of the one and only Person, which highlights the differentiation and uniqueness of each and every one of us seen in his image. It is the perfect antidote to ego. Because in his reflection we can’t kid ourselves anymore. No one is more or less special than the other, equal in his eyes, we all play a part. It goes without saying but you can imagine the awe and wonder that comes from revelations like these. Supernatural in essence they confirm your Faith, build your understanding and completely eradicates all fear. We are in safe hands.

Restaurant Narayana.

It was my go to place in Kathmandu. It wasn’t because the food was better than anywhere else, I was just hooked by the name of the restaurant, a very long billboard spelt out his name in red above the entrance. I don’t know why but it had this attraction to me. At the time I didn’t understand who or what Narayana was or meant, but later learned it was one of the many names of God. It turned out to be the most transcendental personal name of them all; the cosmic form of Vishnu. Vishnu is always the one that comes to save humanity in one form or another here on Earth. He is the manifest representation of God on earth in times of need. Yet Narayan spanned the universe with his body, the identified godhead of the unidentified Maha Purusha; Brahman in Person. There are so many aspects that the Hindu pantheon depicts in the multitude of gods it contain, that reverberate with meaning and essence. Not mere tales and imagery but real life encounters with cosmic forces that will leave us in awe and in trepidation. Narayana though, always left me feeling elated. There was a charm about him that has always stayed with me. Never to far away, his name keeps reappearing from time to time, filling in gaps in understanding as my heart learns more. Restaurant Narayana serve up many dishes on its menu, not only rice and lentils.

Contrition of the heart.

"In Japan, the feeling of shame is regarded as a certain kind of sensitivity and, therefore, a virtue. How can we not feel shame if we ignore our divine nature and our true purpose in life? This is the origin of all shame. Real understanding of Aikido will only come about through daily purification (misogi) and through constantly striving for the creation of a better world.” -Morihei Ueshiba.

Shame, or remorse, as I see it, is the cold you feel when you leave the fire. In the wilderness, by a campfire we warm up, sitting as close as possible. When we turn away we feel the cold night-air closing in, cooling our body down. So for me, the Misogi, our daily practice, our purification is the return to the heat, to the furnace. This changes the dynamics. Instead of remaining in a sin-implied bad conscience of wrongdoing and lingering shame we turn toward our hearts fire and forge and melt in the hearth of love and truth.

Real forgiveness of the heart is not an aftereffect but a reckoning of oneself; when we see the other as we see ourselves we live and let live. Moment to moment. It does not need to take time to turn back to the hearth of the fireplace. It’s a remembrance and acknowledgment within and with it comes all the love in the world. Sometimes we are overwhelmed with grief, of sorrow coming out of nowhere. It’s good to remind ourselves it’s not just our grief but a suffering felt by all people. It’s as if we can become aware of the pain humanity has suffered through the ages and that it is a part of our own pain. We can feel the weight of it and yet we can bear it, not only for ourselves but for everyone else as well. This is the passion Christ suffered for us, not only on the cross but throughout his life:

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” Ego.

The word Ego is thrown around a lot these days. If we use the word in a spiritual context we need to understand that it refers to a very specific quality with a very direct and personal connotation. Unless you yourself have felt the pressure exerted by Truth upon your very own existence you can’t really with confidence speak about the Ego in the spiritual sense. And ultimately if you have not experienced and felt the surrender of your self to the Truth you won’t be able to fully understand what Ego means or constitutes. You can’t be haphazard about it, it’s real and profound, not a small thing at all. So unless you yourself have ventured down that road you shouldn’t really express an opinion because at best it’s only your biased viewpoint with no grounding in your own experience. At worst, it is self-righteous superficiality, thinking you already know everything about it. When we speak about Ego we should do so with humility because we recognise the formidable foe it is in its shape shifting skill of turning everything into its own advantage. The Buddha called it the “conceit of I”. ‘Mu’, or ‘nothingness’ is the Zen way of expressing absence of self. This absence doesn’t give you carte blanche to do what you want. Instead it instills in you a desire not to taint your expression with Ego. This is what purification is all about, learning how Ego works and interferes in order not to be captured by it. Ultimately it comes down to surrender. No half measures will be adequate to subdue its ability to reassure itself. Though the Self is confident we can’t afford being complacent and take things for granted. It easy enough to point a finger but how about ourselves?

Field of dreams.

We generally tend to downplay our own experience and forget that it contains the whole universe; its past, present and future. It is a mountain indeed. Examine your conscious experience. Outside of your own experience nothing exists. Life appears within your conscious experience outside of which you can’t know anything. Consciousness contains all there is; all that you know and all that you don’t know. This is what makes it so miraculous, that you yourself contain and know all things EVEN everything you don’t know. This unknown is the field of not yet manifest infinite potential. You can know it in the same sense a sculptor knows what is contained in the uncut block of marble. Any shape he can imagine and not imagine. This is your experience, the field of your dreams and of your reality. Multiply this experience with all living things and we have a multiverse, all mirroring each other’s lives. Like scattered broken glass reflecting the same ultimate source of a conscious being. How is your experience not big enough? Examine it. It is a mountain. Milk it of information just as the Devas and Asuras used the snake as an elastic gripping rope to wind, twist and churn Mount Meru around its vertical central axis column to extract the immortal elixir from the sea of consciousness; ie. the essence of who we are. You can apply this metaphor in two distinct ways. One is to develop and train your physical body, the other is to develop insight and wisdom through introspection and meditation. Together they address the health of the body and mind of the individual. Now loosen the bonds between the individual and other, see and set yourself in a larger infinite context. See non-difference. Spirit extends beyond individual body and mind, beyond the known. This is really the only way we can come to partake in the whole. So when O Sensei say “I am the universe” we can understand his sentiment and even relate. Yet we are beyond even that and that is what makes it conclusive. Don’t let anyone intimidate you. A true person will only build you up. A true person will only share what is his. A true person lives in your experience and nowhere else.

Todays speculation.

The Buddha and Jesus did not speculate, nor did the Hindu sages. Our Saints did not peddle in ideas and opinions, but offered real life skills true and tested. Heroes for one reason only they proclaimed the Truth. Every time you slander them you miss the point. Jesus said, “He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters. Therefore I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven. Whoever speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, either in this age or in the one to come.” Why is this? Because the accuser is himself blocking off access to the spirit of truth by denying it, and it will last as long as he sticks to his judgement. Speculative knowledge sits on the sidelines and offers nothing but opinions and critique. Safely sitting on the banks of the river throwing pebbles as to catch its attention. Smart remarks only skids once or twice and then disappears.

Guru Power

What is the difference between well meaning scientists that engage in dialogue and their spiritual counterparts, the gurus? Science that strive for truths through research and experience has established our world view; our past, present and future. It is an incredible achievement. Gurus, past and present, have always advocated a different perspective. They speak of an inner universe not measurable by the scientific method nor reached by discursive thought. Worlds apart yet we speak of one experience; our inner and outer apprehension of Life itself. Experts in their respective fields do well to remain in their chosen domain. When they try to cross over using their own set of tools it never works. All the good intentions in the world will not compensate for their lack of understanding. Best advice is to use the methods applicable to each respective field of knowledge. We never ask the mechanic to bring his toolbox into the kitchen to make us a cake. So what does the guru have to offer us? Inner Truth? A reliable map of our interior world? An alternative universe and a science of our soul? Just as we rely on science to come up with the answers in regards to the cosmos (macro and micro) we need to trust the experts in pointing to the truth within. The Guru has this power, to open your eyes to the unknown. He or she will be able to open a window in your soul to the deathless realm of the spirit, to make you

aware of the eternity behind time. In this transmission the guru uses no facts nor prior knowledge to access your hidden consciousness. Through his own transparency and clarity, by remaining in his or her own space, you’ll receive a taste of this inner experience. It will resonate in yourself, and as any scientist will tell you; everything is interconnected. He or she will bypass your mind and see directly to your heart. When the mind sees the heart all knowledge will flow from a new perspective. You will have found a new source, a new set of tools, to disclose your own inner universe and you’ll discover we all share the same substratum; the field of our Spirit. The blank canvas upon which the story of the world is written. Now you’ll see why the language used is different from that used in the scientific world. The Guru is pointing to the heart of the matter. And though you only break the surface to your soul once, the infinite depth to your spirit will make it a lasting endeavour. There’s no contradiction in accepting both world views. We just apply different standards to each; one inner and one outer. The gurus power is like a plumb line, drawing you down into the depths of your soul as a deep sea diver leaves the surface for the deep.

A Baptist’s Soul.

My paternal grandma and grandpa were Baptists. Grandma used to tell us the story when she as a little girl was caught up in the revival sweeping southern Sweden in the beginning of the twentieth century. Her mother who didn’t want her to go to their Sunday meetings hid her shoes from her (herself belonging to our state Lutheran Church). So grandma ran barefoot to take part. This would become her lifelong Faith and also where she later met my grandpa. Like with so many of the Christian revival movements, it was and remain a rejuvenation of the Spirit, a protest against the establishment of a stale religion over the living word. It always is a stirring of the soul to wake up to the Holy Spirit. This emphasis of soul awakening can take many shapes including speaking in tongues. This is not always unintelligible soundings voiced from deep faith but can at times be inspired messages spoken with purpose. My grandma would tell us of one such event that happened during the war. My grandparents had been active in the missionary work the Baptist Church were doing in Africa and had traveled to Colonial French Congo by ship in 1925-27. At the time World War Two broke out and travel ceased to be possible and communication stopped, a son of a village chief from Bania was on an extended visit to Sweden. During a Baptist prayer meeting one man in the Swedish congregation began to speak in his African native

tongue unbeknownst to himself. It turned out to be a message that the son’s father had been taken sick and had died back home. A word of conciliation and affirmation of God’s living presence. This takes me back to my original take on the Afro American southern Baptists gospel music, that is rooted in their slave past. Soul choir singing at its best. Connecting with our roots, often out of suffering, not only as a race but also as a humanity. Deep connection allows for Spirit to come through in communion. Voiced it connects us to our past, to our history as humans. Jesus sets the example, and is the blueprint for Christians, for the suffering, the passion, we as a people can identify with. True passion allows for love and spirit to flow through our veins. This is like listening to voices of the past breaking through to today. The Spirit resonates through time and connects us with the past. It is the eternal sound of soul awakened Truth.

Three Generations.

I used to see things as snapshots of reality. As an instant picture of the here and now, a series of moments of fixed reality. And though it’s beautiful enough, nature never seemed to be moving much. Besides wind, water and fire, most things are pretty still. Generally growth is a slow process so not always eye catching at first glance. So my world did seem pretty onedimensional. You look out the window the next morning and everything is pretty much the same, not much has changed. I’m a gardener and I do appreciate the changing seasons and the growth and death in nature immensely, but I always saw it as ‘now’. Now was always now, and even though things would change slowly through the year, now was always kind of stuck and fixed in time. Once there was an exception to this order, a friend of mine had some dried magic mushrooms and we decided to brew tea from them. We went to the park to enjoy their effect. At first nothing, we sat down in the grass and waited. Summertime in Stockholm, it can be lovely. We enjoyed the sun. Then I saw the grass grow. The colours were vibrant and alive, the trees in the distance seemed to be on fire. But it was just them growing from the roots to its topmost branches. I saw the leaves and flowers grow as they were caressed by the air that hugged them close. The ground beneath me was now sensitive to me as I felt the grass grow between my fingers. Suddenly everything had come alive, like an animal waking up. It was becoming a little overwhelming so we decided to walk home to the safety of his apartment. Now I understood Van Gogh and I could see his paintings depict these moving landscapes. Extraordinary life moving as one piece of

cloth, all things growing in the presence of ever new time. Nothing was static, nothing was unhanging. The sky, the earth, the sun and the moon, nothing was fixed. An inferno in pastel colours. Quite wonderful. We entered his building and the colours on the wall leaped out, was emotional, orange blasted me, red fired, blue soothed like a deep sea, physically engulfing me. Returning to normal, the norm if you wish, yet when my heart is open I see three dimensional space in three dimensional time; past present and future. Three generations of growth in the same experience. Time as we know it has changed. For a tree, time is different. It lives its life fully aware of its constant change. It’s not slow to the tree. You can see it if you look closely. Time itself moves extremely fast. Most of us have no idea, let alone experience it on a daily basis. And depending on our situation we all experience time differently. Can you then experience time as a tree would? Yes you can. Why? Because just as we can empathise with another so can we feel the experience of time beyond our normal perception. Many have had the experience of time slowing down in an emergency, and some have had the experience of accelerating velocity in trauma. Time is surely not just subjective, but as space science makes out, relative. As I stand on the Earth, all its past is contained in the now. It’s actually present in the earth right now. Just as you can see the little girl in your grown up daughter. So when I walk the fields, or the forest floor, I hear the past since it began, and its so beautiful. Therefore the universe is not old. It is present since the beginning. Like three generations in one.

Three-Dimensional Time.

Our understanding of, and access to infinity sometimes only refers to the future. But what if it refers to all past as well? Like doors to the before and after. Doors that can open, and doors that can remain open so that you can experience the past present and future in the here and now, always! Like floating upon the surface (of now) of the ocean with water clear enough to see all the way to the bottom (the past) and with a wide open sky above us (future). Three dimensions of time as generations are layered as mnemonic plates, prisms, each holding the complete spectrum of our senses, the sound and feel of its environment within the grasp of our memory. Imagine all the knowledge of the past, all of it contained in your own experience. Non of it outside of your own event. If we are to believe the Sages and Saints telling us about the One Self, the one single being that is ourselves, then we all contain the accumulated storage of all that has come before. We sit on top of a mountain of knowledge being inevitably passed down to us simply by being born anew. Only when you break through the glass ceiling and glass floor, will the here and now satisfy you. The present moment is nothing without its past and future. There’s no getting away from being here and now, but you can open wide the doors of perception to all that came before, and to all that will be. Then and only then will you not feel the loss of what was before, nor fear the future of what shall come. Then your present situation is perfect as it is, individually and collectively. You then become the narrative, you then will be the change you want to see all around you. You then, will treat everyone as yourself, with one, two or with many. Alone or together, nothing is amiss. And this is the presence of being that is surely needed among us. Then we will discover all those small and great deeds that are done by people to people all the time. We will now discover a world of wonderful beings simply because we have stopped judging and stopped filtering. We now only see brothers and sisters, all hereditary heirs of our accumulated past. If you can do this, there is no need to go anywhere, you are fulfilling your purpose of being a human being and you will feel the sound of time ever present.

Master Race.

We often speak about obvious or latent racism. But we forget to address the culture out of which it arises. There are many ways people use to make themselves feel superior to others. Power is the most visible. Men throughout the ages have ruled through physical strength alone. Subduing anyone and anything by sheer might. Men have become blind to this condition, their need to see themselves as better than, stronger than the next one. Survival of the fittest, top of the food chain, and some will always want to be top dog. Some nations have strived more and have grown accustomed to rule over others. This culture of superiority confer unquestioned assumptions on its citizens which filters into everything they do. As a race they can do no wrong. This becomes clear once you travel around the world and encounter different civilisations and cultures. The ruling races and ethnicities share many of the same traits, like self confidence, self pride, self righteousness and even arrogance to some extent. They also share in the belief that they are always in the right, they know better and there is a hint at being condescending and patronising towards their (former or present) subjects. This sense of thinking they know better is not exclusively their own. We all share in this superiority phenomena, individually and collectively, even smaller and more downtrodden nations or races use it to gain a sense of authority. The Ego will use it to legitimise and justify itself. But with might comes the power to subjugate others. All superpowers are included in this abuse of rule. Dynasties and empires use war to conquer and to control, and the victors write the history left for us to read. It’s the story of man’s ego on a massive scale. Replicated collectively in self proclaimed master races. Now, with whom and with what do you identify with? Gender? Race? Culture? Era? Can you see the mass flow of evolution through the eyes of your particular bias? And can you be free from it?

The shirt off your back..

If you’re not ready to give up everything, even the shirt off your back, you’ll never be able to see through your own mind. The Spirit world is neither mental nor unseen. It’s sticks and stones practical. You can’t think about it without following it up with action. Action makes it real. It demonstrates your grasp of understanding the Spirit-realm. Giving up attachments to your things will free up your mind. You’ll be free. Only by literally surrendering your possessions can you set yourself free. Holding on to your belongings means you can’t surrender your thoughts and ideas about who you think you are. You’re not yet ready to die. Having nothing, knowing nothing, being nobody, constitutes the liberated state. The mind is so strong that unless you sell all of its possessions, it won’t give up. When your best friend asks you for your most precious item, give it to him. Don’t cling to it. Better while you’re alive than when you’re dead. The Ego will argue this—oh no, no need to give up anything, it’s all in your head. The Ego thinks itself free, but is lost within its own perimeters. To break the minds hold over you, you need to relinquish your belief in its supreme authority. You can’t rely on it for authenticity. You are not what you think. Once you begin to suspect that your own mind hold you prisoner, you’ll think of a way out, you plan for extradition, to escape its grasp. One way to confront your mind is to begin to give everything up, to surrender without conditions everything you thought you believed. This will freak the mind out. You’re directly challenging the authority of everything you believe and trust in. It can be scary. But if you have the courage to go in to the unknown you’ll not be daunted. You’re handing your life over into what is true. The Truth will guide you, and set you free. Leaving everything behind is real, not thought out. Breaking out of confinement can be traumatic, but like in any prison break it can take many forms. If it can’t explode, it can implode. If you can’t wring it out, you can reverse it and wring it in. Under pressure it either escapes out or breaks down within. Either way, there’s an escape. Don’t be afraid of a meltdown, it necessitates a change, a transformation. Into the new. But you can’t take anything with you. Just as with the migrative natives of the Amazonian rainforest. A return, to the pristine.

In regards to the ‘work’.

Spiritual work is a common term these days. Some say Shadow work, to highlight the lesser known, hidden or unconscious traits, habits and ingrained patterns—conditioned behaviour, we all display. We’re all formed by the circumstances and preconditions we are born into, and that we continue to live through. Shaped daily by what we face and by what we choose to engage with. In one sense, it is the beautiful array of infinite possibilities and the blend of a limitless creativity that make up this extraordinary diverse planet. Our own make-up is so unique and one-off, that on close inspection we can find no other quite like you. We tend to generalise to categorise human species into groups, or races—our ethnic origins, into gender specific, onto cultural and generational variants, yet a common norm run through us all. Although individually different, we all share in the same raw material that constitutes a person—mind, body and heart. We experience the same emotions, think the same thoughts, decide to go left or right. We’re all born, live, and die, under the same sun. Your and my rucksack are packed with all that came before us, influencing and affecting us on a daily basis. To see and learn from it, is the greatest thrill as it expands our horizons. It gives context and links us to our human past. It gives us insight into the human dilemma and answers our existential questions of why we are the way we are—It helps us understand what we are, and why. This, is a never ending journey, because while we discover our past, we are in the process of evolving, into the new, and the future is being shaped and sculpted by the events going on today. Finding and remaining centred in our identity is of utmost importance, and knowing and seeing the other as oneself, will eradicate all sense of separation. Then, how can this spiritual work go amiss? How can that ever divide us as humans? Of course you are like that, and of course I am like this. Mind you, this is no excuse of mine.

Purpose.

In whatever you do, there is purpose. Maybe similar to my naive belief in keeping every piece of left-overs, for one day, they will have their use. So my shed fills up with cut-offs, odd ends, and seemingly useless stuff, but one day, I figure, just one day, they will be that missing piece needed. Life is rich, and I figure everything has its place, even though we don’t always necessarily know exactly where? But I trust with a little patience, all will become clear. So it is with human relations, and so with the choices we make, there’s purpose with the design. Whether we are conscious and aware of this, once we look a bit closer, purpose and meaning usually reveal itself. Many times we never see purpose in time. It just passes us by, doesn’t it? Can time itself have purpose? When I lie awake at night, I ponder, or rather, I enjoy, times passing. Like drifting on a night sky, quietly before twilight, ambushing the expected sun, but with no ill intent. Like I’m lying in wait to surprise dawn once she awakes. The morning sky has this purpose, to welcome the sun. The birds get it, they’re up, being the first to catch a glimpse from the tree tops, of that rising fiery disc. That’s why I can’t discard a thing. It all fits in.

If Nature can do this, why can’t we? In time, love will overcome man’s hatred, and we will return with purpose to restore what has been lost.

A line in the sand.

Sometimes we must leave the past behind. This doesn’t delete your history, but it gives you a chance to move forward. These are often difficult decisions but they do enable a new start, and perhaps in the long run, a chance to reconnect, and return to, one’s past. Now in a more independent frame of mind, with room to appreciate the good with the bad.

Leaving ones past behind, is fundamentally a spiritual prerogative. Whether one does it from a conscious decision to pursue one’s own liberation, or simply to break free from past confines, doesn’t really matter. The process is very similar. One feel the need, or the necessity, to break with the past. The emotional ties are often very strong and it challenges the person to the core. It’s a psychological dilemma but plays out in real time, with real relationships at stake. It helps to see it in a context of personal development—that it’s not necessarily because of one’s specific situation and circumstance, but more of an impersonal imperative coming from the soul longing for liberation. It’s part of becoming free as a human being, of growing up and realising one’s own identity.

Sometimes we have to demarcate it by drawing a clear line under it. To make a clear decision to mark the point of no return. Yet we all know, that a line drawn in the sand, will, over time, fade. A line drawn in the air won’t last past the brush stroke, and a line drawn in time, becomes but a memory. This means there’s nothing binding, time can heal the past. A breakage was needed, but once done, there’s nothing stopping you to revisit the old. Now from a completely new perspective, free from fear, with nothing to prove or to defend.

The spiritual process takes a hard look at the Ego, and seen from that point of view, it becomes an existential quest. Liberating and fulfilling in the end. Full of love and forgiveness when we shed all blame, as we pass through the narrow gate.

In the spiritual realm though, nothing is done in half measures, so the matrix of time can turn back on itself, completely erasing its own past, leaving us dumbfounded as yesterday had never happened. These revelations totally squashes one’s personal reasons for wanting to break with the past, and lay bare the spiritual drama the ego faces when confronted with oneself. It’s pretty mind-blowing.

Ālayavijñāna

The Store-house Consciousness, alaya-vijnana, represents the normal flow of the stream of consciousness uninterrupted by the appearance of reflective (ego) self-awareness.

It may seem pertaining to your self alone, as your personal experience, but we need to see it as a universal ground of Being itself, that only gains its individuation once it is being reflected, filtered, and perceived through any format; be that a human, animal, vegetation or mineral—in fact, we can see its function in any particularised object, no matter how small, including cells and atoms.

In itself it has no division—it is one unified sense of being. Mind, body and emotions are ‘filled’ with consciousness, and as such reflect perfectly their specific domain and distinct difference. All particulars owe their own defined form and function to the infilling of the Ālayavijñāna. We become who we are, exactly as we are, by the in fi lling of the Spirit—ie. the Universal Consciousness. It fulfils our function to its maximum, just as it fulfils each individual thing and highlights the autonomy inherent in all form. Even the five senses, mind-matter, emotions and hard-to-detect things, gain their sovereign independence. All things, all life-forms, without fail is backed up by, supported by, and sustained by, the Ālayavijñāna. It demarcates our uniqueness. Yet it also, by doing so, reveals its universal nature in its essence:

“Listen, Shariputra, form is emptiness, and emptiness is form. Form is not other than emptiness, emptiness is not other than form. The same is true with feelings, perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness.”

For our benefit, then, this empowers creation, because now it is completely and utter bursting at the seams, filled to the brim, with this consciousness, which is emptiness personified through this human vehicle.

Since we are this non-separate root consciousness, we can attune to each and every particular thing and ‘feel’ their existence from their perspective. The form shapes their experience and give rise to their function. Thus we can experience their individual perfected being. So when we see a friend (or foe), we can literally see and feel their perfection even if they can’t.

The Heart Seat.

The place of a unified perception lies in the heart region, in the chest. It’s the entry port-of-call before it is subcategorised into the five senses and mind. On a rare occasion you may become aware of the single gate entrance point. Instead of always referring to each one of the sensory perceptions at their associated physical organs—ie. sight to eyes, sound to ears, smell to nose, taste to tongue, touch to skin, and thoughts and emotions to mind, we now see that we can perceive experience from one single window, as it were. A doorway through which everything passes into you. One entry portal for all experience. Why is this special? —Because it frees you up from always localising and separating experience, making you more aware of the uniform nature of life, having it impact fully, directly, on your system. It removes the filters and layers to direct experience and gets you in touch with the rawness and beautiful reality of life, like dipping your whole body in a full baptismal immersion. It floods your senses without overloading them. Instead they begin to work better, now unhindered by you compartmentalising them into separate units. Your thoughts suddenly take on an emotional quality, sensory input bleeds into each other—just as colours on a palette mixes and matches on the canvas.

Present Time

We have reduced time from eternity down to eons, to millennia, centuries and decades, to years, months, days, to minutes and to seconds. Our present now shows up on our wristwatch’s arm in less than a millimetres movement. We count down to celebrate the exact moment it hits now. We measure everything in time—how fast we run, how old we are, when work begins and end, when we go to bed, etc etc. Western civilisation have broken up time in pieces, into smaller and smaller units. Without a watch on their wrists, tribal humans orientate within a much larger timeframe. They don’t measure time in units, nor do they separate their individual lives from each other, but live with their communal past as being part of their extended present moment—the now. Their present conscious awareness includes all the past; all of their tribal history as well as all of their ancestors. Their actual time is stretched over infinite aeons, where the future is included as well. This is so grounded and evident by living in sync with, and in harmony with, nature. The forest floor is simply the present, containing all of its past in its soil. Time is like a transparent film, where man and nature is its lens. We need to free up our understanding of time, especially of the now, to create room for it to contain much more than what we usually allow. We need

to stretch time to include much more than simply a momentary window in passing. We can learn to extend our now to include all of our past, and open our timeframe towards the future. Our present moment will then take on a depth that wasn’t there before, a richness and fullness that will blow your mind.

‘Be here now’, the famous Zen idiom, must be reevaluated to fit with a much bigger reality than what we Westerners as well as Easterners had it to mean; a mere fractal understanding of times presence.

The chosen people. God chose to reveal himself to Abraham and promised: “Indeed I will greatly bless you, and I will greatly multiply your seed as the stars of the heavens and as the sand on the seashore; and your offspring shall possess the gate of their enemies.”

So the bloodline of Israel and of Ishmael stem from Gods promises, giving them a clear ancestral linage, legacy and common origin. Abraham received this promise because he was ready to sacrifice his son—his dearest, most valuable possession. This sets a precedence of what pleases the Lord—self sacrifice and submission, obedience and follow-through. Now his people, his seed, are blessed by its bloodline, as a collective and not as individuals per se, just as tribal folklore set out their own unique native origin stories. Though wrapped in the mists of myth, it recounts a common past, a single origin for a people—a collective, not an individual, that is inherited down the generations of the tribe.

Though bloodlines are important to validate who’s included, exceptions abound, and many can be accepted into the fold. What is important to note is that these origin stories, though upheld by family and tribal ties, blood itself is not what constitutes legitimacy, but it’s the link, promise or word from God/Spirit that gives it credence. Blood by itself means nothing without the inference of Spirit.

The Japanese race trace their origin and ancestry back to Amaterasu—the Sun Goddess, and so legitimise their common foundation in Heaven.

As an individual in a collective one’s salvation is in one way already guaranteed. It’s not a given but you’re pretty much a favoured son or daughter, and will be given preferential treatment if you just stay the line. Late joiners, converts, and persons included through marriage, are accepted to boost numbers and to secure offspring. To guarantee the long term survival of the tribe, often the usage of slaves, the stealing of women, and the merging of smaller units into a larger one, would be common practice when in need.

Individual and Collective Salvation.

The priests, the shamans, the elders, would be the ones responsible to carry the story forward, to stay in touch with their ancestral Spirit, and to transfer their story and meaning to the next generation.

Of course, warring tribes or budding nations would assert their rights by claiming divine descent and so their distant past ancestors were embellished with kami-like features and powers. Nothing impresses more than a Godgiven divine right to rule.

But whether you used your spiritual heritage as a pretext to conquer, or as the social glue to keep the family and tribe intact over the ages, it was a survival game—strength in numbers. Individuals had no chance to prosper alone, nor did it mean much unless it would benefit the greater whole. Unless you could pay it forward, God had no use of you. Individual salvation carried no meaning within the tribe. That’s partly why the emphases lies in producing offspring for the community at large—through your seed shall you prosper. This is your religious duty—to make babies. Spirit churned out in the flesh, in numbers.

Only in a well-ordered society, within established cultural norms, can an individual be allowed to go off-pist, to follow his or her own personal guidance, to break with convention, and seek redemption outside of the tribes domain, outside of the collective. Because it’s only within the framework of a larger whole that the individual can be recognised. In a chaotic world, pre social structures, the individual would struggle simply to stay alive. But with the social landscape in place, he’d have room to explore —very much thanks to the social order of the day. A little bit like a lost son, allowed to stray, and eventually brought back into the fold—either as a remorseful, grateful returnee, or as a promised renewer or redeemer of ways long forgotten or neglected. A saviour, a prophet, or an enlightened one, to bring the ‘people’ back on track, back to their ancestral roots in Heaven. To reestablish the bond with our spiritual father, to once again gain a direct contact with divine spirit. And to once again take up that red thread that goes back in history to the very beginning of the world out of which we all stem. So in this sense, any individual pursuit is only, in the long run, for the benefit of the whole.

Beyond the bloodlines of the tribe and beyond the identities of a nation, religious communities rely on Faith and adherence to spirit for their transmission and inclusion in the ranks. Many have developed out of ancient belief forms, updated and modernised forms of already established cults and practices. And once again, the glue that keeps it all together is the common connection to a divine past, hopefully remained alive in the present, and cultivated to be preserved for the future. So it does warrant a thought if you are pursuing an individual path of selfdiscovery, personal growth, and spiritual enlightenment, that it fits and is contained within a larger whole. Because, after all, we are just returning to what we originally was meant to be anyway—a cognisant, integral piece of the puzzle of Life. One among many.

Who do you think you are?

Some believe they must be in a certain state to display freedom. It’s vital and important to understand the circumstances and context around anyones manifestation of their liberated soul, heart and mind. A good and revealing example is to highlight the lives of some realised masters—the Advaita teachers of India—that often lived a secular life with a wife and extended family. Not all Sages and Seers are celibate or ordained. This usually means they have to wear many hats: Guru, mentor, father, husband, brother, grandfather, and whatever other professional or non-professional hat he or she wears. Very much like you and me. We have many relationships to attend and we must adjust accordingly. In Satsang, the Guru is king, but with his wife, he’s her husband. He can’t Lord over her even if he wants to. He must adjust, like we all do, all the time. But, and this is the important bit, he doesn’t need to compromise his freedom for doing so. Only if you believe that one expression—and one expression alone—will constitute spiritual freedom, then you’ll have a conundrum on your hands. The beauty of spiritual liberation lies in the extraordinary pliability of its function. The clarity and bliss inherent is never lost whilst transitioning between roles of duty and family—or between impersonal and personal, between absolute and relative. The key to understanding is seeing how the partial is always contained within the whole, and that the whole is never lost and never far from sight. Superimposing restrictive limitations on your own mind is bound to give you a headache, and make you insecure in your own ability to ‘hold’ your own liberation. Spiritual liberation is not a state of mind —it’s a way of being. In this, we can communicate with no sense of separation nor with any need to intellectualise. Personalise as much as you want, but return at will, to a greater perspective (greater here means larger, not better). Include or separate as circumstance dictate, and know what freedom implies—that each situation have its own perfect means. Then, you are free, to be, who you are.

What takes precedence?

The larger view, the bigger heart, and the greater truth. That is not to say we dismiss the small nor neglect the details, but we include and descend into the particulars from a larger encompassing perspective, from an objective absolute view—a truthful view, neither biased nor fragmented. In this holistic frame of mind, relative distinctions are easily appropriated and understood within the larger context. One’s own varied sense of self conforms to the situation at hand—you are what you need to be at any given time. Now what rules these shifts is not the smaller sense of self—the self centred ego, but rather, the larger sense of being—the one you know yourself to be, before time and space, prior to your identity to name and form—your true Self. When I was in Rishikesh, northern India, Swami Krishnananda (in the Shivananda Ashram) said to us to be identified with Krishna and not with Arjuna when we read the Bhagavad Gita. Read it, and understand it, from the point of view of God, not of man. Live and understand life from the point of view of Truth, and not from a self-centred, fragmented and divided consciousness. This little shift changes everything. Instead of looking from below to what is above, we look from above and see everything below. So strive to gain the correct view, in order not to confuse yourself. It’s quite an ask so we can’t take it for granted. Biased towards Truth.

We can’t sit on the fence! We have to make an absolute decision. You have to make up your mind—either to identify with a partial representation of who you think you are, ie. your ego, or to strive to understand who you are in the deepest sense possible. Once you come upon the living Truth of who you are, you must then claim this to be your only home—your only point of origin. This will take some time, as you need to acquaint yourself with its new environment and gain some experience. Keep ‘returning’ till you realise there’s no more returning needed—you’ve learned to live with a pair of new set of eyes that will not betray you. Your self-imposed limitations fall off like discarded garments. Even your favourite straitjacket won’t fit you anymore. Now you no longer can side with your old self, you’ve made the crossing over and there’s no return. Tough—live with it! That means you can’t entertain doubt anymore. It’s a wonderful certainty—a living natural way of being—that is open and inquisitive without fear. This is the freedom of the self—that knows no other, and yet knows everyone.

Spiritual Ego.

Samsara—the wheel of life and death, the wheel of suffering—the realm in which we all exist. Spiritual pride is a major feature for spiritual aspirants. The spiritual world is not ego-free, nor is the Aikido world, I think we all can hold up our hands to admit to. And there is some truth to the premises that because Aikido doesn’t have the levelling ego-crusher of competitive matches, we often get away with thinking we’re much hotter than reality like to point out. And to add an unknown quantity of spirit into the mix can very well completely blow our own estimation out of the range of human conception, placing ourself among demons and ghosts that haunt our true conscience, if any trace of it remains? “You’ve been a pain in the ass” were the truthful parting words from my guru, as we embraced lovingly. “So have you”, I thought courageously in response. Now if there ever was a true ass-essment, this was it! I got it handed it to me. Somewhat similar to Dan’s assessment of my sword ability —“you don’t know sword!” But, I protested, I know a little bit! “You don’t know sword!” —But I’ve trained… “No, you don’t know sword!” Arghh.. I held up my hand, pinching my index finger and thumb together—I know this little.. “Listen, you don’t know sword!” Ok ok ok ok I get it, I don’t know sword. Let’s step outside—was playing on my mind. But the point made here is a crucial one—how much investment does our ego have in being someone, having something and knowing something? My teachers take that away from me. Actually they just humble me, so I can take something new in, listen with fresh ears, see with new eyes. Don’t be surprised to see big egos strutting their stuff, often without any authority to level them. Scriptures are full of stories where ego is the paramount obstacle to spiritual liberation, pride being often the last thing to go. Now it’s also very interesting and poignant to note, that deep seated pride doesn’t surface until being challenged to the core. Even the Buddha, after his enlightenment, faced Mara—the evil one, in the guise of pride. Meaning, for us normal folks, in our everyday experience, pride, is often never exhibited excessively. But it will come to the forefront when under spiritual pressure. This is how we can understand why the egos defence mechanisms rear up when challenged. So enter.. the double edge sword.

Truth on exhibit.

Once you wake up you’ll see Truth everywhere. You’ll see it in people even though themselves are not aware of it. You see it in a blade of grass, in the wind moving and in your thoughts stirring. You’ll see it in the arts and in the way people move—the way they gesture and laugh. You become aware of the underlying nature running through all things. It’s all displayed. Truth is the ghost that animates you, to whom you owe your life. Artefacts come alive with meaning, their hidden secrets revealed, unknown even to their creators. Truth is being passed down, like a gem sewn into a garment. Through generations it survives unblemished only to be discovered again and again. Now I see the Truth in you and why can’t you see it?

Holy Ghost.

At last, it becomes clear, why they used ghost in the translation. Spirit doesn’t convey the immanence nor the presence as much as ghost does. But it’s not a spooky ghost—it’s a life affirming one, one that sustains and gives you breath without which you would not be. Yet again we see how translations matters. When the message is not understood they choose words they can comprehend, thereby clouding the original meaning. Spiritual literature and scripture are full of difficult passages, hard to grasp, yet the phrases used are often literal to their description of the experience, ie. perfectly fitting the underlying metaphors. Rather then, not change the original wording but wrestle with the difficulty of understanding and wrestle with the angel of Truth within yourself. It may be a super human effort but if that is what it takes, bring it on.

“Hidden among the leaves”

There’s a secret not many know about. It is something that does not reveal itself. It remains hidden. It does not manifest in power. Nor does it manifest as Ch'i or Ki. It’s not a mere thought or delusive imagination. It’s neither full nor empty. You can’t call it nothing since it is who we are. People flounder because they try to grasp at straws. In the end there’s nothing to hold onto. This mystery is hidden in plain sight, but not as a system of movement or as a secret talent. It can’t be seen. It does not stand out. It’s hidden among many. What is the answer to this old riddle then? What is hidden among the leaves? What can hide among the leaves not to get detected? It is not nothing, so what is it then?

The answer should clear up all confusion in regards to who you think you are, and to who you think I am. It will set things straight once and for all. This is the secret all the Buddhas carried around thinking it would be too difficult for people to grasp. So they waited patiently for people to be ready to listen before they spoke. Infinite patience must be accredited them. So why would an old Samurai manual have this title—‘Hagakure’? Their fascination with the acceptance of death gives a hint, pointing to a possible answer hidden among the leaves. Where do you look? And for what? Maybe the dramatic scenes of dying by the sword, dropping to your knees on the forest floor, your last thoughts goes to the leaves you feel touching your face on the ground? Maybe you realise what’s hidden there?

Informed Life.

People get by. The river of time sweeps them along. Acceptance is a good thing yet it leaves me wanting. While learning as you go can’t be faulted, slowly letting go into life, the transubstantiation if you so wish, makes all things consecrated. This seepage of the sacred into our daily life informs our understanding over time. There is a fast track approach however, maybe meant for those that had an early taste of it, now haunted by its memory as if being a reminder. This vague memory calls them to look for it, just as it did the Buddha two thousand years ago. He had an awakening as an infant under the rose-apple tree, that informed him throughout his youth, that made him question his life and the reasons behind it. This longing to get back to

something he once knew was irrefutable. He left home to seek it, and so must we do. In Ch’an China they called this approach the ‘sudden’ school, and though the goal was the same as the gradual path, it emphasised the direct seeing here and now as opposed to the prolonged maturation process over time. Ideally both aspects serve as two sides to the same coin. Neither can be neglected.

The Power of Now?

This is a little misleading because there is no power in now. See it for yourself right now, there is nothing out of the ordinary. If we believe there is power in the now we will always put a quality judgment on the present moment—sometimes you will deduct that you feel it and at other times you’ll say you don’t. If you ascribe power to a certain state of mind or depth of knowledge you’ll flounder forever. Why? Because you identify with a certain experience to be more ‘now’ than any other time. Yes you can have an experience of power, of infinite wisdom and love, but that won’t change your present moment. The real power of now is that there is no power of now. This is more profound as you will find the mystery of life and death right here and now without having to change a thing. The ‘power’ of now is no power! It is being without power—without anything, empty, bare and naked—it has no power. But we rather be powerful don’t we? But who wants power if not the ego? That should make you question the reasoning, make you sit up and take note, raise an eyebrow and smell a rat. The now is not a Samadhi experience nor is it free from thoughts and feelings. Now is the most ordinary thing you know. Every day the same. When you wake up at night, there it is! The Now. A moments hesitation and you’re so far off I can’t see you. We don’t need trust nor faith, as it is as self evident as a look in the mirror. Since we have nothing but the present moment we better look deeply into it. We can coast forever, trudge along, pursue a life worth living, and still come out not knowing what the present moment holds. But the clue is in the now, not in the power.

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