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P E R F E C T LY M I X E D , P E R F E C T LY M ATC H E D ISSUE 1.0 PJs Wine & a Little ‘Me’ Time
A TAD MONROE
pg 34
Preserving your Legacy ...
SCRAPBOOKING
THERAPY pg 20
jen king
MOMMYPRENEUR
SPACE CADETS COLLECTION COLLECTION pg 14
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P E R F E C T LY M I X E D , P E R F E C T LY M ATC H E D
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G D , AP E RZ F E C I T LNY M E ATC H E D P E R F E C T LMY MA I X E
FROM THE PUBLISHERS It is an honor and pleasure to bring you the very first issue of Momology Magazine. We are excited to facilitate this community of women from every stage of life connected by one of the most challenging, and rewarding vocations there is – motherhood. It is definitely not always easy, or fun for that matter. Some of us became moms when we were young, some “got a late start.” Some of us are battling this world as a single mom, and others have been married for decades. Some of us are brand new moms, while there’s groups of us that are entering the stage of life with adult children, their spouses, and their children. The beauty of being a mom is the title never fades or leaves, even as the role matures and shifts through the stages of our lives. With each issue our desire is to bring you joy, laughter, contemplative thought, memories, and new ideas. It’s our sincerest hope that you find something that speaks to you on every page. We also strive to highlight local businesses that are owned by our fellow sisters in motherhood and neighbors as well as those that we feel truly offer something of value to the mom community.
TRACI HUHN PUBLISHER
The days can be long, the years short, the ride a rollercoaster most are afraid to try, but we are all in this together. So instead of envying one another, or comparing our differences as notches in a belt, let’s lift one another up and celebrate what makes each and every one of us unique. So grab a glass of wine, lock yourself in your closet if you have to, and enjoy Momology Magazine, Issue 1.0. Warmest Welcome,
Traci Huhn & Amanda Hensley
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AMANDA HENSLEY ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER
THE TEAM TRACI HUHN
PUBLISHER & CREATIVE DIRECTOR
amandA HENSLEY
Associate Publisher & Advertising Director
JOHN LEWIS
Editor in Chief
teri darby
STAFF WRITER/designer
CONTRIBUTING writers: Diane berry stephen hayes amanda hensley traci huhn amy lightfoot Kate mccullough brandi mcdaniel
FROM THE EDITOR Hello Moms. I hope your day is going well. I’m a little surprised to see you having time to read the Editor’s Letter, of all things. But, since you’re here, I will do my best not to disappoint. You may feel like you’re sitting on the rim of a vast ocean, uncertain about what you will find between these pages and how you will respond. What is a momology, anyway? Our goal is you will find a place where you can shrug off all the other mantles you wear day in and day out and find rest, nurture, fellowship, and a refuel- all as a mom. In this issue you may find a new appreciation for comic books, get excited about the adventures of a moose, and/or find solace in the quiet moments you create in life, among other things. I lend my editing eye to all you moms, my own first and foremost. You are the backbone of our society, the glue that holds it all together, and the sole reason many of us stand as tall as we do. I salute you. Momology is all about you. I will not distract you anymore here with pleasantries and editorial chatter. You are here to read about being a mom, among other things, and I will not tarry any further. So go ahead. Thank you for stopping by and thank you for reading. Until next time,
PHOTOGRAPHERS:
CACHE BEAN PHOTOGRAPHY TRACI HUHN AMANDA HENSLEY
published by:
allymac concepts
&
PUBLISHING MARKETING
John Lewis Editor-In-Chief
CONNECT WITH US /MomologyMagazine
Find us online: MomologyMagazine.com
/MomologyMag
Contact us: info@momologymagazine.com
Momology Magazine is a bimonthly publication of Allymac Concepts. Momology Magazine is not responsible for any omissions or misrepresentations submitted to the magazine. Advertisers represented in this publication and their agencies assume all liability for the content of advertisements and photos. Opinions, advertisements, and articles expressed do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the publisher or Allymac Concepts’ employees. Be advised many writers featured in this publication are not necessarily professionals but moms writing from personal experience and should be read as such. Reproduction or transmittal of any part of this publication is prohibited without express permission in writing from the publisher.
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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TABLE OF 14
Featured24 Stories 40
COVER STORY: WORK MY SWORD IS BIGGER
How going against the grain has worked for entrepreneurial mommy Jen King.
ABOUT MOMOLOGY MAGAZINE
FEATURE: SHOP PJs, WINE & A LITTLE ME TIME
A behind the scenes interview with A Tad Monroe and why moms are going crazy for their Tuesday night trunk shows.
FEATURE: PLAY SCRAPBOOKING THERAPY
Create beautiful memories to be cherished for generations with colorful scrapbook creations.
We define a Mom simply as “one’s mother.” Defining her any other way would be an injustice to all she is as one of the most complex creatures known to man. Everyone alive has had a Mom and we are here to celebrate her, cry with her, help her, encourage her, love her and study her, so that we can all be better Moms. At Momology Magazine, we know that it takes a special woman to be a Mom, and we want to celebrate and learn from the many “tricks of the trade.” We are here to lift up women from all walks of life, uniting in what we all have in common – those little, and eventually grown, voices that call us Mom. We believe that we are all “Perfectly Mixed, Perfectly Matched” and invite you to embrace your mommy place in life, realizing that as long as you are doing your very best, you are the perfect match for your children. STORY IDEAS Do you know someone who has an interesting or inspiring mom story? Sure you do! Just like all kids are different, all moms are unique in their experiences, perspectives and talents. We want to learn and grow from these different walks in the daily life of a mom and invite you to send your story starters to stories@momologymagazine.com. 6
CONTENTS Also in this Issue ... PROTECT Teaching Internet Safety..............18
8 FAITH On the Habit of Silence .................... 8 The Astronauts ................................. 10 WORK Independent Distributor Opps ... 12 Beyond Spring Cleaning................16 LOVE Love as a Verb .................................. 18
EAT Knife Techniques for Produce......27 HEAL Why They Won’t Sleep...................30 Healing of Essential Oils................36
18 PLAY Area Easter Celebrations.................9 It’s a (Dance) Mom’s Life ................ 26 TEACH A Certain Age ................................... 28 Meet Beauregard Le’Moose.........32
SHOP The Modest Mommy......................42 Mom Power Tools............................44 RELAX Chocolate and Wine......................46
ADVERTISERS
The Greater Houston, Texas area has over 6 million people with 50% being represented by the female population. Our readership will be extended beyond this area by means of digital publication as well as an accompanying website and social platforms. Using the phrase “Perfectly Mixed, Perfectly Matched” we seek to encourage moms to embrace their mommy place in life and realize that as long as they are doing the very best they can, they are the perfect mommy for the children that call them MOM.
BUYING POWER OF WOMEN Studies have indicated that the buying power of women in the United States is continuing to increase, with women accounting for over 85% of all consumer purchases and seventy-five percent of women identifying themselves as the primary shoppers for their household (askingsmarterquestions.com, 2014.)
REQUEST A MEDIA KIT For a media kit, visit momologymagazine.com or contact Amanda Hensley at (936) 494-9962 or amanda@allymacconcepts.com
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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ON THE HABIT OF SILENCE
The most Important Meeting on Your Daily Agenda By john lewis
B
usyness. That Great American Pastime we all indulge in faithfully. Always going, always doing, always planning, always checking, watching, working, texting, tweeting, calling- always busy. Then we eat, sleep, and do it all again- another day. No offense to any nosey dads out there reading this article, but I would suggest it is even worse for a mom. Being a dad myself I can only write about what I observe, but I have seen enough to know that being a mom, whether working or not, is some of the hardest work on the planet. You are always on the go, the master multi-tasker, the juggler of everyone’s things and schedules, the planner, organizer, and comforter extraordinaire, among other things. Not to mention labor, birth, nursing, and all those long days and nights that only mom will do. You’re exhausted. And yet you want to be closer to God. You want to hear His voice, know His will. You want to grow in faith and relationship with our Creator and Lord Jesus. You want to be an example to your children and God’s compliment to your husband. To really know Him.
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faith You want to, but how? How, when from moments before your eyelids even flutter awake to moments after they flutter shut again you are bombarded with the sounds of the Great War for your attention? A baby cries, a child whines, your girlfriend calls to complain, your mom wants to chat, episodes of your favorite shows beckon, your phone is blowing up with emails and texts and phone calls, your husband wants to have lunch, the PTO wants your help, your bills are screaming to be paid, it’s your kids naptime, it’s time to check the mail, do the laundry, clean, straighten, and organize. It’s time to ... Do I hear a baby crying?! And on top of all of that you have all of the advertising vying for your pocketbook. Billboards and e-ads, popups and spam mail. Buy this, try that, subscribe and save, ON SALE NOW. Embody the sultry essence of true womanhood in three easy steps! Join this club, switch to our service, buy more to save more, and do it now! Where do you find God in the midst of all of that? Well, here’s the deal. I don’t have 5 easy steps to knowing God more, one specific verse or quote that will unlock the big secret, or a holy handkerchief you can sleep with under your pillow each night. I wish I did, but I have found in life there are no formulas, passwords, or easy secrets for the things that matter most. Life is, after all, quite a bit messier than that. So, you bring your mess and I’ll bring mine and let’s try to figure this
thing out, taking comfort in the messiness of the cross. The challenge, as I see it, is that God generally speaks to us in the quietness. His voice is often the soft, steady one underneath the noise of life. Take a moment and read 1 Kings 19:11-13. God is often in the gentle breeze, speaking in the silence of our hearts. I challenge you (and me) to develop a habit in practicing frequent silence. Instead of bringing a list of petitions to the Lord or filling the silence with lots of words, even praise, just seek Him. Be with Him. Listen. Let your heart remain silent and ask Him to teach you to listen to His Spirit. Everybody’s situation is different, but here are a few good ideas on how to find silence in the busyness. Continued on Page 23
Have an Egg-celent Easter Y’all! 30th Eggstravaganza
April 12 - all day @ Eldridge Park 2511 Eldridge Rd. Sugarland, TX 77478 For more information visit www.sugarlandtx.gov
Toddler Tuesday Egg Hunt
April 8 9AM @ Discovery Green 1500 McKinney Houston, TX 77010 For more information visit www.discoverygreen.com
Easter Event Calendar Easter Egg Hunt
@ Blessington Farms 510 Chisolm Trail Simonton, TX 77476 For dates and times email info@blessingtonfarms.com
Pasadena’s Easter Eggstravaganza
April 12 8AM-11AM @ Strawberry Park 1104 Parkside Pasadena, TX 77502 For more information visit www.ci.pasadenatx.us
Mondays with Mommy
April 7 10AM-11AM @ Texas Children’s Hospital W. 23501 Cinco Ranch Blvd. Katy, TX 77494 For more information visit www.lacenterra.com
Breakfast with the Easter Bunny
April 13 8AM-10AM @ The Houston Zoo 6200 Hermann Park Drive Houston, TX 77030 For more information visit www.houstonzoo.org
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
9th Egg Hunt & Vendor Market April 12 10AM-4PM @ 7 Acre Wood 4401 N. Frazier Conroe, TX 77303 For more information visit www.7acrewood.org
Easter Bunny “Egg”sperience
April 6 12PM-3PM @ K2 Academy of Kids Sports 12603 Louetta Rd., #114 Cypress, TX 77429 Pre-register online at www.k2academy.com
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faith
THE ASTRONAUTS
Exploring a New World Together By BRANDI MCDANIEL
W
hen our oldest son was barely four years old we received a diagnosis of Autism. Reeling, as though the ground would come out from under me, I stood there listening as the doctor said things like “He’ll never get married. Never form real friendships. Never ride a bike or drive a car.” I couldn’t believe it. It was as though they were talking to someone else. How could these “nevers” apply to my child? Our precious boy. A ball of energy and a smile full of sunshine. Surely, she made some sort of mistake. I mean, I knew SOMETHING was going on, that’s why we were at the doctor’s in the first place, but this diagnosis sounded like a doomsday report! Over the course of a two hour evaluation she had just sentenced my son to a lifetime of loneliness and total dependence with just a few words.
teachers, coaches, church leaders, etc., all in an effort to have him included. Rarely was he sidelined or excluded and never when I could help it. OUR NEW WORLD (VIEW) As the years have passed, I have seen this little boy with a whole list of “nevers” succeed in school (with the help of an aide), ride a bike, and make friends. For my part, God has taught me patience, tolerance, and has even taught me to extend grace beyond what I even thought possible. My son’s autism has not been a curse, but a challenge that God has used to remake us. The world that the doctor was so sure was shut to my sweet boy hasn’t been shut after all, but rather my son and I are like two explorers discovering a brand new world together. A pair of astronauts, indeed! •
MY WORLD WAS CAVING IN Still swimming in the thin air, I gathered my wits (and my two year old and four month old) and prepared to leave. Choking back tears of hurt, frustration, and just plain fear, I managed to squeak out the words “You can no more know what the future holds for my oldest child than you do for either of my younger two children. Who can say if any of my children will marry or drive a car? I can’t see the future and neither can you. Only God knows those things. Thank you for your time.” Tearfully, I carried the baby, shuffled the toddler, and held on to the hand of my sweet, beaming autistic son who was blissfully ignorant of the life sentence he had just received. On the car ride home I could see my wide-eyed boy gazing out the window. I was numb. All of my hopes for him, my dreams for my firstborn, were crushed. My mind became flooded with my own list of “He’ll nevers”. He’ll never be an astronaut I thought. He might want to be but he won’t get to be. Who will let him? What if he wants to be an astronaut? No one with a diagnosis of autism gets to be an astronaut. Suddenly, the world that had once been so wide open with possibility for my child was now closing in and fast. It About the Author: was as though I had lost the child I had and this stranger was in his place. Brandi McDaniel is founder of The SisI cried a river of tears. terhood Challenge Ministry, a ministry OR WAS IT? But God is good and He has a way of reminding us that His ways are not our ways. Over the next several years we did everything we could to “normalize” life for our children. We started our oldest in school in a program for preschool children with disabilities that was focused on helping him to acquire “normal” speech skills. We got very serious about talking him through every tantrum and every meltdown (which were many). I got used to the sleeplessness nights (autistic kids are often not good sleepers) and I became an expert at gracefully fielding stranger’s callous questions, most typically: “What’s wrong with him?” I befriended 10
serving Jesus Christ and encouraging women to embrace their full role in God’s Kingdom as Ambassadors for Christ, since 2011. Follow The Sisterhood Challenge on Facebook for daily encouragement.
I AM BRANDI & I AM MOMOLOGY
THE SISTERHOOD CHALLENGE We are a place of ENCOURAGEMENT and LOVE seeking to restore VALUE to women and to EQUIP them to EMBRACE their roles as AMBASSADORS FOR CHRIST. “She opens her mouth with wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” P ROVE RBS 31:26
If you would like to be a part of this online community of sisters in Christ, we challenge you to join us! /TheSisterhoodChallengeMinistry
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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Flexible Oportunities ...
work
ANN DAVIS Independent Sales Director (434) 996-6035
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n 2003 Ann Davis began her Mary Kay business in Virginia sprinkled around the obligations of her nursing career and raising her 2 teenagers. She debuted as a Director in 2007 and has earned 2 Career Cars, National Court of Sales 6 times and 41 quarters as Star Consultant. Ann makes sure every woman she meets has a chance for a positive Mary Kay experience and relied heavily on her business to introduce herself to Texas in 2010. As a director, Ann teaches other consultants the tenets of a healthy Mary Kay business: time management, money management, and customer service. Find out more at: marykay.com/anndavis
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Ann Davis
Independent Mary Kay Sales Director www.marykay.com/anndavis (434) 996-6035 Nicole Wilson nicolewilson.myplexusopportunity.com
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ROBIN BACHMAN Independent Distributor (832) 704-1439
Independent Product Consultant
(936) 837-9128
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ROBIN BACHMAN (832) 704-1439 robin.bachman.myitworks.com
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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WORK
MY SWORD IS BIGGER THAN YOURS Space Cadets Collection Collection
I AM JEN & I AM MOMOLOGY
By AMANDA HENSLEY
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For Jennifer King, owner of Space Cadets Collection Collection, seeing someone smile or making someone’s day better has always been her main business objective. When she decided to open not just her first, but second retail comic book store, it was no different. You could say it’s just the “mom” in her. Being the oldest of her siblings, she’s always had a mothering instinct, which easily translates to serving her customers. Being an entrepreneur wasn’t always on the top of the list for Jennifer. After studying Criminal Justice at Southern Nazarene University, Jennifer attended the police academy with plans to join the FBI. “I originally wanted to work in the medical field, but ended up loving sociology and the study of people’s behaviors in crowds. This led to a desire to understand criminal behavior and then to my degree,” says Jennifer. “I honestly would love to have pursued a doctorate in that area of study, but not as much as I want to do what I’m doing now.” Jennifer commented that she enjoyed her time in the police training, but when she found out she had hypotension, she was forced to retire from the academy and go a different direction. “I’m not a cop, but if I can grab your thumb, I can make you do anything I ask,” Jennifer playfully pointed out. A wife of 21 years and mother of two boys, for Jennifer, fondly known as Jen, opening a comic book store was an easy decision after giving up the police academy. “I started working when I was 16 and never really stopped, except when my kids were tiny, and even then I ran my eBay business from home,” said Jen. “Collectibles, toys and comics have always been things that I have been passionate about and having a business focused on them made sense to me.” That, combined with a knack for retail, is what made Space Cadets Collection Collection come to life. The comic book and collectibles community is a close-knit one in spite of, or perhaps, because of the many stereotypes made popular by the media. Jen takes note that one of her greatest challenges has been to overcome these stereotypes. “Comic book stores are often portrayed as places where socially awkward teenage males hang out,” says Jen, “but the diversity is quite vast. We have customers that are male and female of all ages, social statuses, races and beliefs that frequent our store. I have an opportunity to get to know my customers in their real state.” Jen strives to create a warm
and inviting atmosphere every day that her store is open; for her customers to feel at home and completely accepted. That’s one of the reasons why she has a ‘no profanity’ rule in place when you walk through her doors. “You can always tell when a new customer comes in. They’ll use a swear word and I ask them not to or they’ll be asked to leave,” says Jen. “They usually grumble a little bit, but then my regulars just say ‘Awe, that’s just Mrs. Jen!’ and they quickly get over it.” I guess you could say that’s the innate cop in her. “I want an environment where parents feel peace about letting their kids come.” Jen attributes her store’s success to supportive customers, who have become a part of the Space Cadets family, and also to keeping her faith in God at the center of everything. . “God has blessed me in so many ways,” says Jen. “We’ve just expanded our store in the midst of a recession successfully, I have a wonderful family, and I’ve been given opportunities recently for my work to appear in some major motion pictures.” One of the most difficult things for every business owner and Mom to master is work-life balance. For Jen the only other venture that has been rewarding is being a Mom. “It’s everything to me,” says Jen. “I find my motivation in my family as well as the people I meet every day. I don’t take a salary so it’s never been about the money. Have I made someone smile today? That’s a good day then.” To combat the world screaming loudly around her, Jen makes intentional time to spend with both of her boys, ages 14 and 10, individually. She offers some wise motherly advice. “They have to be able to see that they are more important to you than the job. It’s easy for them to make the mistake that it is the contrary. If you are always having your discussions with them while also working on the computer, texting and reading work notes, they are smart enough to know that you’re not really engaged with them. As my son put it, “Mom, you aren’t really here, are you?” Heart breaking stuff. Be present with your kids when they are around. Step. Away. From. Your. Cell. Phone. Do your work when they are asleep or in school. The same applies to your husband. He is your center. Make him feel like that every day.” Jen laments that one of the hardest things is not having time for PTO meetings, Mommy lunch invites and school event planning committee meetings. She had to come to peace with the fact that the only moms at her sons’ schools who know her are their best friends’ moms. At the end of the day, she is thankful that the things her family loves are what bring her the most joy, and feels she lives an amazingly satisfying life. Being the Mom can be a challenge as well. “At work I am the boss, the superstar, THAT Jen, the Commander, the person that brings joy to so many people,”
Jen says. “At home I’m the lady that makes you clean your plate.” Straight from the mouth of her husband, Mike, Jen is described as “fun, friendly and driven.” During our short photo shoot her playful personality came out in a big way. While posing in her store, I commented that she looked ready for battle, with a fierce “runway” face. Jen immediately laughed and said, “I have a giant sword too!” After returning with a foam sword at least six feet in length, she promptly struck a pose and proclaimed, “My sword is bigger than yours!” with a hearty chuckle. I think if you were to spend just a few minutes with Jen, you’d walk away with a new friend. That’s what makes it so easy to understand why her store is not just successful, but an important bedrock to the community. For Jen, it takes a big sword and strong armor to stand by what’s important on a daily basis, devoting her time to her family first and foremost. If you ask her, she’ll tell you - it’s a role worth fighting for. Besides offering a wide variety of comics, toys and collectibles, Jen and her staff have space for birthday parties, different leagues and competitions throughout the month, as well as a variety of extracurricular classes for all ages. For more information and exact dates and times of her classes, visit spacecadetscollection.com. •
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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WORK
BEYOND
I
t is very difficult to even think about organizing if every room in your house is in disarray. When you are in this situation, the hardest part of organizing is just getting started.
SPRING
PRIORITIZE»
Getting and Staying Organized
ORGANIZE AS YOU GO»
CLEANING
By Diane Berry
My advice is to list your priorities – where to start – clearing the area of your home that would be of the most benefit for you and your family now. Include on your list all of the areas that need to be decluttered and in order of priority. Once you have decided where, then you are ready to start. Just take it one room at a time and deal with all of the clutter in that area only.
Let’s say you start in the family room. Remove everything that does not belong there, stacking related items together that belong in the same area – for example paperwork that belongs in the office, children’s toys that should be returned to their room/toy box, dishes/glassware that should be in the kitchen. This will make it easier when deciding what to do with what’s left. Once everything is sorted in piles, discard obvious trash – old papers, magazines, etc. and then start putting away the piles of like items you are keeping. Have a box or bin on hand for items that you will donate to a charitable organization. You do have choices for everything in that room – keep, discard, donate, consign, give to family or friend.
ANALYZE YOUR SPACE»
After you have put everything where it belongs, clean the room and look at your furniture and the arrangement. Placement of your furniture is key to having enough space. Try moving the furniture around to offer a better “traffic” flow through the room or to
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WORK EDITOR’S NOTE: Have you ever opened your eyes on that first day of Summer Break only to realize you still hadn’t found time to do any Spring Cleaning? If that’s you, don’t sweat it. You’ve come to the right place. Imagine reducing your clutter and not having a big need for annual heavy duty cleaning! Work these tips and techniques into your daily routine and I know you will be amazed at the results. create more space. Perhaps you do not need everything in that room – it could be repurposed for another room or used to create more storage in the garage. Or, it may be time for it to go.
ENJOY!»
Now, sit down and enjoy your newly decluttered room. If you follow this plan throughout your entire house, you will be amazed and pleased with how fresh and peaceful your home has become. Staying organized can be challenging especially if you have small children. Most children love to help, and making a game of putting toys away can be fun while teaching them this little task. With you and your family staying on track daily to put things back where they belong, you will have the organized home you want and deserve, and this definitely will simplify your life beyond what you may have imagined. Now, on to the next room on your list. •
Diane Berry, Professional Organizer db consulting
“If you want to be clutter free, call me.” •I organize homes and offices, small and large. •I can help you downsize, arrange your furniture, shop for accessories, and even stage your home for sale. •Do you have a pending move? I can help organize the packing. •I even have a “clutter control” service to help keep up with mail, papers and other recurring clutter.
PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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LOVE
LOVE AS A VERB a series on Surviving the Chaos Together By TERI DARBy
T
he discovery phase of a brandnew relationship and the overwhelming excitement of being “in love” motivates positive behavior and selflessness toward one another. As time goes on, the “new love” feeling begins to fade and the romance that brought you together is not enough to sustain the relationship through the trials of marriage and raising a family together. After 27 years of marriage I have learned that loving my partner is a choice that I must actively demonstrate to him on a daily basis. True love that will stand the test of time and survive the chaotic nature of raising children, becomes a verb, a valiant effort that we make daily in order to let our partner know what they truly mean to us. It is only then, that the warm and fuzzy feelings of romance and intimacy still manage to filter through the chaos and charm one another throughout the course of the marriage. To demonstrate love as a verb, I would like to share with you, 10 principles that I wish I had known to adopt in the beginning of my marriage so that my spouse absolutely knew he mattered..
Continued on Page 20
LOVE
LOVE THE FEELING is a fruit of
LOVE THE VERB
~Stephen R. Covey
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insure your love, protect your legacy
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Scan this code with your smartphone to be directed to our website. axa-equitable.com/insureyourlove Life insurance contains exclusions, limitations and terms for keeping it in force. Please contact a financial professional for costs and complete details. The named individual(s) offer securities through AXA Advisors, LLC (member SIPC) and as an agents of AXA Network, LLC and its insurance agency subsidiaries offer the annuity and life insurance products of AXA Equitable Life Insurance Company (NY, NY) and those of other carriers. AXA Advisors, AXA Network, and AXA Equitable are affiliated companies. AXA Network, LLC does business in California as AXA Network Insurance Agency of California, LLC and, in Utah, as AXA Network Insurance Agency of Utah, LLC.
GE-83173 (2/13) (Exp. 2/15)
G30108
LOVE Love as a Verb .. Continued from page 18
1 TEAMWORK
You would think that leading a family together as a team should be a no-brainer. We learn teamwork through sports, music, in the classroom and even on the job. Yet realizing that a marriage also requires teamwork does not seem to come naturally for us. What does it mean to be a team in marriage? There are simple things, like providing an “extra set of hands”. Looking back, I appreciate that my husband always offered to take the kids to practice while I cooked dinner, even when he was exhausted from a long day at the office. Yet being a team player in a marriage means so much more. It means being prepared for those situations when the kids come to you with what they want when your spouse has already said no. Or supporting your partner in front of the kids, but addressing your differing opinion later in private. If you teach your kids that you are in it together, there is less room for manipulation. To maintain a unified front, develop a game plan early on so you are prepared for common parenting situations that may arise. Finding a common ground in advance not only shows your children you are a team but also demonstrates love through respect for one another. Which brings me to the next topic - respect.
2 RESPECT
It is easy to deny respect that you think your partner has not earned. Though it took time, I learned that respecting my husband made him feel loved and inspired him to earn even more. It is especially important to demonstrate respect towards one another in front of the kids. When discussing differing opinions, try to hold your conversation in private as children learn how to treat people by how their parents treat people. Both unintentional and deliberate negative body signals and behavior will later be mimicked by our children, manifesting themselves in inappropriate ways. Oftentimes, children are not mature enough to understand what they are copying. Ironically, we tend to treat total strangers better than we do our spouses. Another way to show respect is by learning and adapting to your partners communication style.
3 COMMUNICATION
“A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” ~Ruth Bell Graham
4 FORGIVENESS
The forgiveness and grace shown to me by my husband through the years has made me a better person. I would have been broken hearted if he had allowed my poor choices to come between us. The lack of perfection in our roles as partners and parents is inevitable. We all make mistakes, but holding onto bad decisions of the past is poison that can surface at any time. Nobody likes to be reminded of how they don’t measure up. Instead, forgiving your partner will show them love of the highest degree. I can truly say that one of the reasons I love David so much is that I love who I have become because of him.
5 DIFFERENCES
Sometimes it is hard to respect and “Respect is what we owe; love, what we give.” embrace that you have differences. ~Philip James Bailey
At the end of the day, when you finally reunite after a long day apart, it is easy to throw communication to the wayside. But making an effort to make your spouse just as much a part of your day as your coworkers is super important. Set aside a few minutes each night to talk. Share challenges and successes with one another - whether you need a solution to a problem you are having with your boss or she needs your support after dealing with two toddlers and a whiny nine year old all day. Effective communication does not necessarily come effortlessly. Not only does communication require your time, but you must also always try to assume positive intent. I remember during the early years of our marriage that I would ask my mate why he was doing something a certain way. I wanted to understand or was just plain curious. Not knowing the reason I was asking, my husband heard, “You big dummy. Why on earth would you do it THAT way?” One simple word had a negative connotation to him, but instead of talking to me about it, he shut down. It hurt his feelings, something I never intended. Instead of trying to find out why it upset him, I just assumed that he didn’t want to bother explaining it to me. Yes, very silly, I know. If my husband had assumed positive intent, he may not have thought I was criticizing what he was doing. Eventually we figured that one out, but not before years of miscommunication. During disagreements, discuss the problem rather than laying
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blame, name calling and defiling your partner’s character. A cooling period when angry before discussing the problem can help you avoid saying something you don’t mean that could scar your lover’s heart.
There are different ideas about roles, raising children, and even decorating the house. You were raised by different people who have their own ways of doing things. Maybe your mother always held babies when they cried and his mother thought that would spoil them too much. Expecting your partner to always do it your way is unrealistic and can feel demeaning. Also, allowing your mate to show you their way validates that you value their opinion. However, being able to choose not to do it that way remains an option as an individual. Celebrating your differences will attract you to one another. After all, it is those differences that attracted you to each other in the first place, and makes the relationships much more interesting.
Love as a Verb ... Continued on page 22
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“Sometimes it’s the little things that count most.” ~Alexandra Adornetto
LOVE
9 RESPONSIBILITIES
Love as a Verb ... Continued from page 18
6 TIME
Making time for each other can be next to impossible with his job, your job, and the kids’ needs. Date nights are important, but stolen moments with one another remind you of the reasons you chose to spend your life together. Your partner also needs time to themselves, to be themselves. Whether your thing is reading a book, going for a run, or grabbing a pedicure, time for yourself rejuvenates you to meet everyday challenges. Remember that your spouse needs this too. He may prefer watching football with his buddies, playing his guitar, or maybe writing is his thing. Sometimes we just need alone time to do ... absolutely nothing. Regardless, what a loving, unselfish act it is to help each other have a break regularly.
7 THOUGHTFULNESS
Continue to let your spouse consume your thoughts - or at least some of them. Do something loving regularly for your partner. One thing my honey did for me is make the coffee every day before taking his shower. Likewise, I would get up at 5 am to make his breakfast and lunch. This morning ritual, which took very little time, helped us feel cherished by one another in the daily whirlwind where everything else we did was for the kids. Thoughtfulness translates to being considerate. Even something as simple as pouring an extra glass of tea for your spouse when getting some for yourself can let your love know that you are thinking of them. I have always appreciated that my husband brought me coffee, opened doors for me, and yes, even cleaned up the kids vomit so I wouldn’t have to!
8 BEDTIME
Believe me; I know this one is especially difficult while raising a family. Nonetheless, try to go to bed together as often as possible and avoid talking about tough issues in bed. The bed should be a sacred place for you both to unwind and rest. If one is a night owl, sacrifice the time to spend with your partner when they turn in for the night. You would be surprised at how meaningful that can be. David and I have gone back and forth with this one. When we first married, he was the night owl. Then we had a child who would not sleep at night and I became the night owl. We both know how it feels to go to bed alone, feeling undesirable. Nip this one in the bud by sacrificing the time so neither one of you feels that way.
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It helps to agree on ground rules for sharing the many responsibilities of having a family. I love how my daughter and her husband share night time responsibilities. Who does what is not necessarily written in stone, but there is a mutual agreement that the workload is shared. While one is cooking, the other is caring for their small children. They share in baths and bedtime chores as well. If one is sick or just plain tired on occasion, the other tries to make an extra effort to get through the routine so that they can enjoy their time together after the kids are tucked into bed.
10 TOUCH
Research proves that human touch releases hormones that help us cope and be healthier. Lovingly touch your partner daily. By this I don’t necessarily mean sex. Hold hands. Hug. Offer a much needed neck massage. My sister-in-law complained to me once that she was envious because my husband always had his hands on me and she was right. If he wasn’t holding hands with me, he had his arm around me or was playing with my hair. I loved it! It is okay for your children to see such demonstration of affection. They need to know that their mommy and daddy love each other and have a good example of healthy, loving touch. I feel very blessed that I married a man who knew that love is a verb and allowed me to also learn this over time. Although we have had tough times that no parent should have to endure and learned hard lessons along the way, we have spent the last 27 years loving each other through it all. There is no doubt in either one of our minds that we are loved, respected and cherished. This is not a place we came to overnight. Rather, it took deliberate, hard work and each of us believing … Our marriage is worth it! •
FAITH TAG TEAM On the weekends take turns with your husband or find a close friend or relative to watch your kids. If with your husband, one of you watch the kids while the other goes on a walk alone with the Lord. Then swap places. As you walk focus your attention on God’s Creation. Listen to the sounds of the birds, notice the animals around you. If you can find a bench to sit down for a few minutes, sit and rest. Turn your heart’s focus to being silent before God. Draw near to Him. Let Him speak to you. TURN IT OFF Choose one day a week to keep your cell phone turned completely off. Focus your heart on the Lord though you may be doing other things. Don’t turn the TV or radio on. Just let there be silence as you go about your day. Listen for His voice. REPLACE SOMETHING Observe how you spend your time over a couple of days. Notice the time you spend checking Facebook, email, texting, Pinterest, or just browsing around on the Internet. Carve out a portion of that time to practice silence. Give yourself to God. Give your thoughts to God. Close the eyes of your heart and rest in Him.
On the Habit of Silence ... Continued from page 9 START YOUR DAY Wake up 15 to 30 min before you normally do, preferably when at least the kids are still sleeping. Find a peaceful, quiet place to practice silence (see above) in the same place every day. I know to some of you this may sound like a very unpleasant thing to do. I understand how precious sleep can be, but remember how much more valuable having a closer relationship with God will be and just try it. You’ll be amazed how quickly your body will adapt. DRIVE YOUR CAR Most of us, the moment we turn the key in the car the radio fills the silence with music. Once a day when you have the car to yourself, leave the radio off and seek the Lord. Don’t let your “To-do List” or other worries flood back in to your thoughts. Just listen. Focus your heart on Him. Rest in His presence.
These are just a few suggestions, but don’t stop here! Be creative. Find some ways to practice silence that work for you. The important thing is to make practicing silence a habit. Though the Great War will most definitely rage on you can have peace and rest in Him. Doesn’t that sound so good? I leave you with the words of the Psalmist: Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! Psalm 46:10 •
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SCRAPBOOKING THERAPY Preserving your Legacy for Future Generations By Kate McCullough
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aby’s first steps, birthday parties, sibling arrivals, vacations, first days of school‌ being a busy parent means that you are not only in charge of being present for these experiences, but are also responsible for documenting them for all to look back on in the future. Scrapbooking, a beautifully creative way to preserve these memories, can also provide therapeutic benefits for moms that are always on the go.
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I AM KATE & Scrapbooking is a long-time hobby enriched with sentimental value and creativity. With technology at our fingertips via cameras and smartphones, and social media encouraging one and all to share their day to day lives in the form of photographs, we are able to capture the most wonderful (although sometimes not the most ideal!) moments of our lives. My scrapbooking hobby began 8 years ago when I received a Winnie the Pooh scrapbooking kit at my first baby shower. Along with the internet, this kit opened up a world of possibilities for creating a keepsake of the life of my child in lieu of the traditional baby book recording of milestones. Over the years, my scrapbooking hobby has evolved as I have progressed in technique and have been introduced to new products. I have been fortunate enough to be magazine published here in both Australia and the U.S. and have been featured on a number of design teams. But what I love most about the hobby is unwinding at the end of a hard day or week, knowing my babies are sleeping soundly and shuffling some papers, photos and embellishments to record special moments of our life. Scrapbooking is an easy hobby to take on as it can be as simple or complicated as you would like to make it. These days there is the opportunity to choose from Smash books, SN@P albums, Project Life albums, and if you are like me, 12x12 inch albums. Digital scrapbooking is also quite popular – you don’t have the ‘mess’ of hybrid scrapbooking, just log on to your computer and create! However, the therapy of getting messy is what draws me to this hobby. It is perfect for my daughters to join in as well, creating their own pages of memories. We can add memorabilia and souvenirs from vacations, or school awards and accolades to their albums. So how do I find everything I need to get started? I search the web! I don’t have time between school runs, after school sports, family catch ups, grocery shopping and all the cooking and cleaning to be heading out to stores to find THE.PERFECT.PAPER for my pages!
BASIC TOOLS TO GET YOU STARTED • • • • •
Acid and lignin free adhesive Trimmer/scissors/metal ruler and craft knife Pen Cardstock/patterned papers/embellishments And photos!
CONSIDER A KIT
Kits are a great starting point. With this option, you receive enough products to create a couple of pages with the opportunity to experience different mediums at the same time - all coordinated for you. There are some great kit clubs online, and some have subscription options so each month you get a new kit delivered straight to your door. Easy!
I AM MOMOLOGY JOURNALING
Journaling is important on your pages. Record those special moments reflected by photos you are scrapbooking. Dates, places, and the feelings of those in the photo or by those present when the photo was taken are great things to remember when looking back upon the memories you are recording.
EMBELLISH!
You can embellish or decorate your pages anyway you like. I really enjoy splashing a bit of bright paint around and also love to stamp on my creations. Adhesive-ready embellishments make it easy to stick to to your page quickly and fuss-free. There are some beautiful products available, some of my favourite are from Flourish with a Bling, who have a range of beautiful pearls, rhinestones, puffy shapes and even fabric flowers to add that extra special touch to your creations. Remember to have fun. This will reflect in your work and will create a beautiful legacy that will live on long after you are gone. Future generations will enjoy reliving your experiences through the photographs and words you have documented. •
HELPFUL LINKS Flourish with a Bling: flourishwithabling.com.au Project Life: beckyhiggins.com/products/
Smash:
eksuccessbrands.com/kandcompany/
Sn@p:
simplestories.typepad.com
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IT’S A (DANCE) MOM’S LIFE What Really Goes on Behind the Scenes? By amy lightfoot
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ver noticed how when you are a kid, though having little or no control of anything, you feel like the world is yours to command? Yet, when you become a parent, the one presumably “in control”, you find yourself defined more and more by the activities and exploits of your kids. Funny, isn’t it? Well, my daughter, among many other things, is a dancer. What does that make me? That’s right – I am a Dance Mom. Ashlyn started dance with a combo class of tap and ballet at age three and I was happy with her progress as a dancer at this level. Students are taught the basics of dance and how to listen and follow instructions in a creative learning environment. Then, we stumbled upon competitive dance class. At the age of 5 ½, Ashlynn was introduced to a dance camp at a competitive studio and we have not looked back. That first year of competitive dance was a whirlwind of late nights, title winning, trophies, tiaras, and happy moments. Ashlynn decided to take on her first-ever solo and she won two national solo champion titles as well as 5 regular solo champion titles. I was a proud Dance Mom! In the competitive dance world, this was very impressive for a 5 year old. That was all that it took, the competitive dance bug bit us and bit us HARD. As we embark on our second year of competitive dance with the “Dance Moms” show on Lifetime increasingly popular, I have become the local expert and am questioned frequently. Does the actual world of competitive dance compare to what is seen on this popular reality television show? Well yes … but mostly, no.
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One of the questions I am asked most is “Do the moms fight and argue?” Do we all secretly hate one another, like the show? No we don’t. I am fortunate enough to be a part of a great group of moms who truly want nothing but the best for their kids and mine. These moms and kids are my second family; they know more about my personal life than many of my best friends do. (Talk about your life being changed through your kids’ activities!) I spend 3 plus hours every night of the week (Ashlynn has class Monday-Thursday) and most of my weekends (during competition season) with them. Do they get on my nerves sometime? Sure they do, just like a real family. Do we argue occasionally? Yep, we sure do. Do we argue enough to make a reality T.V. show? No we don’t. Sorry to disappoint.
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I AM AMY &
I AM MOMOLOGY
Being a dance mom is hard, similar to what you see on T.V., (minus the fame and glamour). You have to wear many hats. I am a hairdresser, makeup artist, soothsayer, coach, seamstress, baggage handler, financier, taxi driver, entertainer, and mom. And we all know the many hats a mom wears. It’s a tough job! And I have the same concerns or worries that run through every other parent’s head, no matter what activity your child is involved in. Did I pick the right place? Does my child do too much? Is she/he talented enough? Did I buy the best equipment? Am I pushing them too hard? And yet after all the worry, somehow, they, and we, always seem to grow through it all regardless. At the end of the day, our ultimate goal as parents is to raise successful adults who can function in society. Not on a reality TV show, but in the real world. Not where everyone gets a trophy, minimal work is recognized, and all you have to do is show up. The real world where there are winners and losers. Where hard work and persistence pay off. Where laziness and apathy do not. Among the many qualities and skills competitive dance teaches my child, the most important is that she is not a winner all the time. She is in a different age bracket this year competing against tougher competition because it’s a larger age range. I love that she is not winning all the time and that she has to work extra hard this year. Don’t get me wrong, I love seeing her smile when she wins, but I love when she displays good sportsmanship and congratulates the girls or boys who did win even though she didn’t. To me that is winning every time, and why I love being a Dance Mom! •
You know your daughter is in dance when...
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A CERTAIN AGE By Robyn Whitaker
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Robyn had always dreamed of being a mother. She and her husband were blessed with three beautiful daughters. Although mothers teach their children, Robyn feels she learned much about herself from these little girls. Now independent adult women, she is learning once again. This time how to navigate being a woman who will also always be their mother - And sometimes gets to be their friend.
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or years, I longed to be older. Something in my young life just seemed to be missing that a certain age would magically grant. I wasn’t really wishing my life away, just contemplating how time would empower me. And now….well, I am older. No, it is not my birthday. No, I am not pining for years gone by. And no, I am not tracing the lines on my face and wishing for less “character”. I’m simply taking a look at my journey. Where I have been, where I am now and where I hope to be – reminiscing, evaluating and dreaming. Yes, Robyn is allowing her heart the “D” word! My life has been a journey full of profound changes. Its script packed with deep sorrow, great joy, and everything in between. It continues to unfold. Some call this time of my life “Act Two” – middle age. And like every fine narrative, the creative tension builds. “Act One just sets the scene, who our heroine is, where she came from, the forces that shaped her. Act Two is teeming with twists and turns as the pivotal moment of choice comes into view. Act Two reveals the dramatic center of her authentic plot. What will happen next? How will the heroine cope? How will she change?” (Sarah Breathnach) I thought I knew who I was 20 years ago. I guess that is where, “If I only knew then what I know today,” comes into play. Yet, this age, this middle age, this Act Two, simply cannot be entered without decades of life under your belt. Without Act One, I would not be the woman I am today. It has set the scene and serves as a compass for the journey ahead and for the woman I am still becoming; a journey that hopefully finds me more authentic, wise and courageous. What will happen next? How will I cope with the twists and turns, the choices and drama? More importantly, how will it change me? Honestly, I don’t have the answers….yet. But, I can almost guarantee that I will not be hanging out back stage! It sounds risky and filled with so much life. Yes, I am a woman of a certain age….and loving it! •
I AM ROBYN & I AM MOMOLOGY.
COMING IN 2014
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For More Information Contact Robyn at
InhaleMinistries@gmail.com
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PROTECTING YOUR FAMILY IN THE CYBERANARCHY By John Lewis
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magine a country known for having no rules, no accountability, and no form of law enforcement. Would you visit? Let’s say, for one reason or another, you had to. Chances are, you would educate yourself on the known dangers and then take any and all precautions before you left. Fair enough? Well, today the name of this country is the World Wide Web. “It’s like the Wild West, the Internet. There are no rules.” – comedian Steven Wright, in an interview with A.V. Club. The internet is a tremendous tool for research, social interaction, and fun. Countless studies and articles have been written on how pervasively and quickly it has transformed our lives. Whether for the good or ill is a topic for another day, but in this article we’re going to take a look at internet security. I was privileged to sit down for a few moments with the knowledgeable Gary Valmain, owner and operator of ComputerWurx in Conroe, TX. For the past 15 years, Gary has been assisting people with various types of computer problems and brings a unique perspective to the discussion. Based on his experience the worst security threat facing internet users today is some of the newer viruses coming out now. “People writing viruses are not kids anymore, they’re professionals. There is organized crime behind it.” From the unemployed scientists in Eastern Europe to governments unfriendly to the western culture, the development of new viruses and spyware involves professionals who are interested in one thing: gaining access to your personal information. They’re after your checking, savings, and investment accounts. They’re after your debit and credit cards. Lastly, some spyware is coming from commercial interests tracking your personal habits for marketing reasons.
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In the midst of it all we have our children online at younger and younger ages, simply unaware of the monstrosity of people in the world and the capabilities they have to inflict harm through the internet. Gary very strongly recommends having an internet filter and setting up a user account specifically for the kids so that it restricts internet access to specific sites. “Computer usage for kids has to be controlled,” he said, “the younger they are the more controlled it needs to be.” AVG offers AVG Family Safety (formerly Bsecure) as an excellent option for this purpose. The key to this is education. Technology advances at neck-breaking speeds as malware becomes more sophisticated by the day, and the stakes higher. Busy as we all are, this is one arena we cannot afford to remain apathetic in. We ourselves must learn and then teach our children how to more safely navigate this cyberworld of anarchy.
PROTECT To get started protecting your family online take these tips from Gary: 1. Install a good antivirus and keep it current. 2. Install a good anti-spyware and keep it current. 3. Have your antivirus and anti-spyware configured properly. 4. When choosing your antivirus and anti-spyware look at several reviews based on performance, not popularity. 5. Stay away from products that market themselves heavily via tv, radio, magazines, and online. Most of the good ones (ESET being an exception) do not. 6. Remember, a lot of spyware promotes itself as anti-spyware or an antivirus.
Don’t click on it. 7. Stay away from registry cleaners and memory managers. 8. Keep Microsoft Windows updates current.
Gary recommends Avast! as a good free option for an antivirus and ESET as a good paid option, but suggests there are many other great options out there. For antispyware he uses Malwarebytes, Superantispyware, and Spybot, among others. With ComputerWurx, Gary’s objective is to assist people with any and all computer related problems. “If you have computer problems of any kind, I can help, “he says, “but my top three by demand are: 1) Virus/spyware 2) Networking issues 3) New equipment setup and installation.” The virus and spyware problems are so bad that they currently make up the bulk of his business. He provides his services on site or by remote access. Gary can also keep your system working properly in several ways. He will assist you in getting a good antivirus and spyware installed, take the time to configure
it properly, and consult with you on how to use and how not to use email. He can set up your home or business network. He can also connect remotely to your computer once a month to visually inspect your computer for unwanted software, viruses/spyware, or just anything unnecessary. According to Gary, even harmless spyware, if left on your computer “is like a crack in your armor other spyware and viruses will exploit.” In other words, be proactive. If you live anywhere from the Spring/ Tomball area all the way through Huntsville, TX and need assistance with computer problems of any kind, give Gary a call at (281) 367-8765. Whether experiencing computer issues currently, uncertain if you are adequately protected, or if you would like assistance with the best options for educating and protecting your kids, Gary has a solution for you. My ComputerWurx. Does yours?•
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BEAUREGARD LE’MOOSE KEEPS GETTING LOOSE Judy Phillips and Brenda Nichols By AMANDA HENSLEY For years Judy Phillips, wife and mother, has devoted her time to serving children as an elementary school teacher and counselor in Huntsville, Texas. As part of her duties she often supervises students as they work. One day, to pass the time, she found herself creating simple rhymes in her head. The words “A Moose is Loose” popped into her mind and she scrawled a simple verse about a moose being loose in her hometown. His name was Beauregard, as “I needed a name to rhyme the ending phrase ‘in my backyard.’ True Story,” says Judy. Later that same afternoon she shared it with her good friend, Brenda Nichols, Women’s Basketball Head Coach at Sam Houston State University, whose children happened to attend Judy’s school. She took her words and brought them to life with her colorful illustrations. Thus began the travels and adventures of Beauregard Le’Moose. “Brenda and I have a total of four Beauregard books finished with one in print at this time; Beauregard Le’Moose is Loose is New Orleans,” says Judy. “Beauregard Le’Moose~A Jaunt in New York City is scheduled to be released in 2014, as we understand it. The locations Beauregard can visit are limitless!” All four books in this series were written in 2008, with the first not going to print until 2010. “Publishing definitely takes patience!” said Judy. “It will have taken six years for the second one to be published.” They’ve worked with Smooth Sailing Press from the beginning, which came under new ownership in 2013, bought by Cris McGinnis. Judy says, “Cris is forward thinking and marketing minded. She knows how to move the company to new levels, and we are elated about that.” The Beuregard Le’Moose book series isn’t the first that the talented Brenda Nichols has illustrated. She’s received a silver award for illustrations completed for Wooly Willie’s Christmas Gift, by Wendie Ruffner. Phillips and Nichols have also developed a chapter book series about a little girl named Miss Priss who sheds light on the world of ten year old girls and what they are thinking and accomplishing. “She is a gal who likes to try new things and develop all kinds
of skills,” says Judy. “The first book in that series is due to be in print by the end of 2014. To date, the most exciting accolades these ladies have proudly accepted is the Silver Mom’s Choice Award for their Beauregard Le’Moose series. “The validation this award provides for continued work on the series is inspiring,” says Judy. “We also love to visit with folks at signings and other author events to introduce our beloved Beauregard to them.” The future of Beauregard is sound for this talented team. They continue to work on new developments and designs and hope to build a broader market for the books, which are currently available through Smooth Sailing Press at Amazon and Barnes & Noble. They both continue employment as an elementary school counselor and basketball coach, but would love to one day be able to write and illustrate books full time. For now, they feel truly blessed to be living the dream.
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Take two highly accomplished married women, both with children and Judy with two young grandchildren, and the efforts made to simplify life prove crucial. “Simplify? Hmmm. That’s a very important concept in today’s high tech, no holds barred high expectations world we now live in,” says Judy. “For me, to simplify means to be quiet in moments. Enjoy some stillness. Allowing myself to soak in some nature, or to simply read a book for pleasure puts things into perspective for me.” Judy feels that, especially for younger ladies who are juggling work, family and other obligations, taking time for self is important. Brenda says, “I simplify my life by ‘living in the now’ and enjoying each moment as it comes.”
Whether you’re a single, young, older, working, stay-at-home, or hopeful Mom, that’s sound advice coming from two women who’ve managed to juggle it all while realizing their dreams. At the end of each day their families are still a priority and their hobby turned exciting new venture is bringing smiles to children’s faces all across America. The only question is where will Beauregard Le’Moose get loose next? •
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EAT
let’s talk veg
Asparagus Hold one asparagus by each end and gently bend until it snaps. Line the rest up and cut where the one snapped for an easy guide to removing the tough ends.
Avocado After slicing the avocado in half lenghtwise around the seed, carefully remove the seed with edge of knife. The skin easily peels away from the avocado, leaving you with an intact half that can be sliced or cubed. Slicing or dicing while the avocado is still in the skin and trying to scoop out with a spoon leaves a lot of wasted fruit left behind. *Always use caution when handling sharp knives. Never attempt any techniques you do not feel comfortable with. *Recipe for Fresh Salsa adapted from Jamie Oliver.
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Onion
EAT FRESH SALSA
1 pint cherry tomatoes, diced 1 bunch cilantro, chopped 1 serrano chile, diced 2 T red onion, diced 1 clove of garlic, minced Juice of 1 lime Salt & Pepper to taste 3T Extra Virgin Olive Oil
TIP: When cutting tomatoes,
Combine all ingrediants and stir well.
the use of a freshly sharpened knife or a serrated knife is best.
TIP: Extra Virgin Olive Oil is always best in raw preparations such as the Fresh Salsa. It’s fruity quality and richness will give your salsa some sass! Cut lengthwise and always leave “hairy root end” while cutting to keep onion intact.
Garlic
Make 2-3 horizontal slices through 2/3 of the onion.
Use a hand held grater for a quick mince.
Slice from top to bottom almost all the way to the “hairy root end” across onion. Now you’re ready for a fine dice.
Chiles Cut chile lengthwise. Remove seeds with end of a spoon. Slice lengthwise and cut from one end to other for a fine dice.
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HEAL
SIMPLE HEALING through Essential Oils BY STEPHEN HAYES
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ealing through the use of essential oils may seem like a relatively new concept to many, but the reality is that these oils are some of the oldest and most powerful therapeutic agents known to man. Essential oil use in healing, therapy and religious practice spans centuries, with documents dating back to 1500 B.C. recording the use of herbal prescriptions and oils during the time of the Ancient Egyptians. More recent research into the extensive medicinal benefits of essential oils, during the early to middle 20th century, has led to a selective level of acceptance by conventional medical doctors of many oils that have shown to heal and treat a number of diseases and injuries. Essential oils are easy to incorporate into your daily life but you must do your research as not all oils are created equally. The basis of doTERRA essential oils is Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade (CPTG), which is the industries’ highest quality standard. doTERRA is the only essential oil company that has earned this branding due to the extensive tests that are performed on every batch of oil to ensure purity and consistent quality. The tremendous healing power and extensive benefits of doTERRA CPTG essential oils make them beneficial for a variety of things. The recipe below combines Lavendar, Melaleuca and fractionated Coconut Oil to create homemade baby wipes that are safe and effective for your child’s delicate skin.
2 KEY INGREDIENTS: LAVENDER & TEA TREE OIL
Lavender is known as the “Swiss Army Knife” of essential oils because of its versatility. It calms dry, sensitive skin and is recommended for most rashes, which is what makes Lavender Oil a key ingredient in Homemade Baby Wipes. Other common uses are allergy relief, anti-anxiety, relief from bites and stings, postpartum depression and sunburn. Melaleuca (also known as Tea Tree oil) is used to treat rashes, bacterial infections and yeast infections, which makes this essential oil an important component in the wipes. Studies show that commercial wipes are made with ingredients that can irritate a baby’s delicate skin. This is why we recommend simplifying the gamut of products your family comes in contact with daily by replacing them with CPTG Essential Oils.
HOMEMADE WIPES
1 roll of premium paper towels or cloth wipes of your choice 2 cups of warm water 2 tablespoons doTERRA fractionated coconut oil 3 drops of doTERRA lavender 3 drops of doTERRA melalueca Airtight storage container Cut paper towel roll in half with a serrated knife. Use half the roll now and half the roll later. (you may need to cut in thirds or quarters depending on your container size) Place towels in storage container. Combine water and oils and add the oils and water mixture, turning towels until liquid is absorbed. Remove the cardboard roll and pull the wipes from the center.
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BUDGET-FRIENDLY
You may think that making this transition is something that you cannot possibly fit into your budget. However, the cost difference between making your own wipes and store bought wipes is less than $0.05 per wipe depending on the size and brand of paper towels and whether or not you use cloth wipes, but the benefits of the oils within the wipes – the calming of Lavender and the healing of Melaleuca – far outweigh the difference. Since you’re only using a few drops of each oil per batch of wipes, each oil lasts a while and has many more uses other than baby wipes. If you think of the doctor’s bills you will omit by replacing harmful products with ones packed with the healing benefits of these oils, you will realize you cannot afford to NOT make the change. For more information about the healing beneifts of doTERRA Essential Oils, contact Stephen and Elizabeth Hayes at jeremiah.3017@yahoo.com and remember that “Being healthy is simple.” •
This super easy, do-it-yourself, homemade baby wipe solution not only smells great, but is gentle and healing for baby’s skin and also safe to use for cloth diapers and wipes!
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WE ALL CRAVE COMFORT BY AMANDA HENSLEY
B
inkie, Lovie, Pacifier, Blankey, Fluffy Rabbit or Teddy... whatever it may be, or whatever you may call it, we all, more than likely, had a comfort item at one point in our lives. I was a pacifier baby. I still fondly remember throwing my pacifier to the sea gulls soaring above us as a toddler when we were on the boat home from an island in the Gulf of Mexico we used to visit in the summers. I suppose I thought that Mommy seagull needed my “machine”, as I used to call it, for her babies more than I needed it. My oldest daughter is in love with her lovie. Wherever we go, whatever we’re doing, we must never forget “Lie-Lie”. She holds it by the edge, dragging everywhere and through everything, plays peek-a-boo in the car with it, and pats it like a fondly held baby periodically. The tricky part is prying it away to be washed on occasion. So, what is it about comfort items? According to the Anxiety Disorders Association of America, anxiety in children is a deep rooted fear of something. For infants and toddlers who are just learning to explore and experience this GIANT world around them, those fears, as irrational as they may seem, are very real. That comfort item, especially something that’s small and can be carried around, is their one constant.
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As Moms and Dads, we have to go to work, have other appointments, use the restroom (on occasion), go to sleep, etc. Point being, there’s eventual separation several times a day from our infants and toddlers. The way they experience assurance and security in our love for them and our relationship as parent to child is by physical touch; hugging and telling them how much you love them. When we’re separated for any reason, it can cause anxiety. Without getting all “science and research” on you, I’ll submit to you this one question-a food for thought, if you will. Is a comfort item a bad idea? The beauty of parenting is it’s your decision to make. The irony of reality is every child is different. Go forth and be comforted! •
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More A Tad Monroe fashion on Pg 43!
A TAD MONROE PJs, Wine & a Little Bit of ‘Me’ Time By Traci Huhn
H
igh fashion combined with affordability can seem like an oxymoron, especially when you are a mom. Is it possible? As a woman enters motherhood, she soon realizes that over the course of the next couple of decades, her body will take on extra curves and ‘fluff’ and her spending will take a sharp turn away from self and settle on the precious individuals that call her ‘Mom’. As she struggles to adjust to her new body and budget, trendy boutiques fade into her distant past and she begins to wonder if she will ever feel stylish again. 40
I AM DENISE & E
I AM MOMOLOGY
nter A Tad Monroe, a relatively new, fashion-forward, online boutique that has quickly captivated an audience of over 4,000 fans. Every Tuesday at 8:00pm (CST), women all over the world log onto Facebook in anticipation of A Tad Monroe’s Tuesday night ‘trunk’ shows. The luxury of shopping from home, in your pajamas with a glass of your favorite wine in hand, after the kids are tucked into bed, makes this weekly online sale an event moms don’t want to miss. A Tad Monroe was first started in 2012 by two entrepreneurial moms, Denise Ramsden and Lauren Maddox, with the average mom in mind. Named after their two youngest (at the time), A Tad Monroe kicked off with affordable and trendy jewelry and accessories, and has now added clothing, handbags, scarves and other fashionable items, taking on the form of a full-blown online boutique. Moms love finding steals on pieces that they often see on their friends or coworkers and only wish they had time and money to purchase for themselves. And let’s face it – all women love a bargain! The Tuesday night ‘trunk shows’ are not only convenient and fun, but they also make you feel like you are shopping as a part of an amazing community. Here’s how it works: Each Tuesday night the show is announced. The featured items will appear on their Facebook page, one by one, with limited quantities. If you would like to purchase the item, you simply write ‘sold’ under the item of choice and the items go to the ‘winners’ on a first-come first-serve basis. You receive an invoice via PayPal and once payment is received, your goodies are quickly shipped to your doorstep, free of charge in the United States. “I love A Tad Monroe!,” said Lisa, a loyal customer., “When my sister first told me about it, I didn’t think it would be my thing. Shopping on Facebook? If only I knew how much I would love Tuesdays at 8 o’clock! There are so many things I love about A Tad Monroe. Most importantly, I think it is great for a busy mom! I can’t remember the last time I shopped in a store, by myself, in peace! A Tad Monroe gives me the opportunity to shop for something pretty to update my wardrobe without the hassle of a car seat, stroller, and small little hands exploring!” While the convenience definitely draws women in to shop with A Tad Monroe, it is the quality of the products and service received that keeps them coming back each Tuesday night for new trends and styles. Tera, another raving customer, loves the shopping experience so much that she tells all of her friends about it. “I receive so many compliments literally every time I wear a piece from A Tad Monroe – whether it be a necklace, earrings, a shirt, or my personal favorites – watches and scarves” she said. “Everyone wants to know where I get my unique accessories… A Tad Monroe, of course!” Although the business was originally started by two friends, Ramsden has since bought out Maddox and now operates the business solo. The increase in workload may have been a challenge for Ramsden, but you would never know it by the exceptional service that she provides to her customers. “I try to offer the same kind of service I would want to receive,” she said. “For instance, knowing that not all boutique clothing fits the same, I try to be very honest about the way things fit up front. I’m very open about my own size and descriptive in how
Thank you Caché Bean Photography for this lovely family photo!
a piece will fit. I even try them on and post pictures so customers can see for themselves. If a piece is marked as a medium, but fits more like a small, this is something they should know prior to making a purchase. However, if a customer would like to try something on before making a decision, I try to accommodate that as well.” While Denise strives for top-notch customer service, she also works hard to maintain a work-life balance for her family. “When the kids get home from school, I shut it down and give them my undivided attention,” she said. “As far as they are concerned, it doesn’t affect my time with them, because I won’t let it. However, running a business from home is not easy. Other than when the kids are home and awake, I’m always working. I may shut it down when they get off the bus, but as soon as they are in bed, it’s right back to it. In addition to running the Tuesday night sales, there is a lot of research that goes into staying on top of the latest trends as well as into finding out what my customers love.”
JOIN OUR TRUNK SHOWS!
Need something new for Spring? Not sure how to flatter your new mommy curves? Or maybe you want something special to wear on that date night you finally managed to schedule? Put A Tad Monroe trunk sales on your calendar! For more info, FIND, LIKE and SHARE us at Facebook.com/ATadMonroe. •
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SHOP By AMANDA HENSLEY
“I want you to know there are many, many things I appreciate about you even if I’m not always good at letting you know…I appreciate the way you respect yourself and our relationship by the way you dress and carry yourself, and I never have to worry.”
THE MODEST MOMMY Let’s Start With the Basics
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“I want you to know there are many, many things I appreciate about you even if I’m not always good at letting you know…I appreciate the way you respect yourself and our relationship by the way you dress and carry yourself, and I never have to worry.” My husband wrote these words to me on my birthday just last month. How sweet to hear that he notices and appreciates my choice to dress modestly. Whether we understand it or not, choices we make in wardrobe and public appearance are the best way to communicate both to our husbands and our young daughters the respect we have for ourselves, our bodies and our marriages. At the end of the day the fact is we wield a tremendous amount of power in how we present ourselves as women. The question is: how will we use it? As a woman it is easy to thrive off of the attention we receive from others, as many of us often respond to the Love Language Words of Affirmation. But when those words disrespect our bodies and instead bring us shame or treat us like property, then we need to change how we are using this power. It speaks to our deepest, most innocent desires, that we want to be valued for what we carry in our minds and our hearts, and not what our body looks like or how much of it we are showing. How we choose to dress can command the attention of a room and still allow you to feel like a beautiful woman. As with most matters in life there are extremes along the spectrum even of proper dress. One side believes wom-
teach en should wear turtleneck sweaters, (and if they have built in gloves that cover every inch of skin all the better), with floor length skirts, tights, boots, a shroud and not a single ounce of makeup. The other extreme feels the more makeup and loud jewelry the better, with skirts so short your grandmother would blush at what peeks out when you move, see through shirts with different patterned bras (you can see them through said shirt after all), and anything else that would attract attention not only from the opposite sex, but the world around them too. I find the best way to remain modest yet still have fun is to remain somewhere in the middle, leaning slightly toward either side as the situation fits. Being a long-time fan of the TLC show “What Not to Wear” I picked up several tips that I often find myself considering when I go shopping. In keeping with this issue’s theme of “Simplify” let’s talk about the top 5 items every woman needs in her closet.
1. A GOOD BRA!
That’s right ladies, you heard me correctly. A good bra. I was never gifted in this particular area even through high school. Somewhere in college I suddenly “grew” to a whopping B cup. I was always able to get by on inexpensive bras found at local big box stores. It wasn’t until after I became pregnant with my daughter that I all of a sudden had the “Dear God, what are these?!” experience. You can always go to a specialty or other bra store to be measured, or simply invoke the assistance of your husband or close girlfriend. It is extremely important to be fitted correctly. This ensures the girls are up at attention rather than down in the ditches, which does wonders for your figure, the way clothes fit and your back.
2. TANK TOPS IN SEVERAL COLORS
Layering is very popular and can turn an outfit from boring to beautiful. Most tanks can be found for less than $10, and often times are on a table with several other colors. I have my favorite brand that I always keep an eye out for when new colors or patterns come out. I have a long torso, so I make sure to look for the long fitting tanks, because these often help add a little length to some shorter fitting shirts, covering my tummy and often a few inches over the tops of my jeans, so I never have to worry about revealing a plumber’s crack when I bend over. Plus they’re super comfortable.
3. BLUE JEANS
I like to keep one pair that’s an extra dark wash and one pair that are a little lighter. I usually prefer dark jeans anyway, so mine do not get very light on the wash scale. Dark jeans can be dressed up very easily. One of my favorites are dark wash jeans, white tank, black blazer, red jewelry and red heels. I can throw my hair up in a messy bun, but still look put together. Best part like item 2, it is
comfortable! Jeans can often be worn a couple of times before needing to be washed, provided you didn’t fall in a mud puddle or something, which simplifies laundry days.
4. AT LEAST TWO PAIRS OF DRESS PANTS
I usually try to stick with a black pair and a khaki pair. Reason being that colored pants, even sometimes something as simple as navy blue, can be difficult to pair with tops and accessories. With black pants, they go with almost any color shirt, black belt and black or coordinating shoes. Khakis can be worn with black, brown, navy, white, etc. You never know when you need to appear somewhere in business attire, so best be prepared.
5. A COMFORTABLE PAIR OF FLATS
Whether you are a career mom or stay at home mom, for the occasions that you need to wear dress shoes a comfortable pair of flats is always your safest bet. Yes, those 4 inch pumps are cute, but if you are attending a function where you will be on your feet all day and you are not used to donning such attires, your feet will hate you come 4 o’clock. Be kind to them, because they carry you your whole life! So whether you are a woman who could shop until she drops, or one who dreads the thought of stepping foot into a mall, just keep in mind before you buy “What else could I wear this with/to?” Those occasional splurges on specialty items are ok, because they make us feel beautiful, but stocking your closets and drawers with staples will not only last longer and make more outfits, but they never go out of style either. •
“Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control…” 1 Timothy 2:9
I AM AMANDA &I AM MOMOLOGY PERFECTLY MIXED, PERFECTLY MATCHED
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WORK SMARTER.. not harder. Simpler solutions for life’s day-to-day regimen. Here are some of our top picks of gadgets and gear to add to your mom toolkit. 1. Origami Stroller with Phone Charger Generators in its rear wheels charge stroller while you walk and can even charge your cell phone. $849.99 ... 4moms.com 2. Hamilton Beach Single Serving Blender The single-serving travel cup is great for blending portable smoothies, shakes and frozen drinks fast. The ultimate in convenience, you can blend and sip from the same cup. $19.99 ... hamiltonbeach.com 3. Trellie Trellie is an ultra-simple, handbag accessory that notifies you of an incoming (or missed) call through bright flashing LED lights. $49.99 ... trellie.com
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4. Washable Keyboard by Logitech From a light dusting to a soak, this washable keyboard with drainage holes is easy to clean and easy to dry. $39.99 ... logitech.com 5. Miipc With MiiPC, you can protect your kids without compromise. Control what, how much and even when your kids are accessing the web, games, video or apps no matter where you are. $149.99 ... miiPC.com
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relax
My alarm didn’t go off, so I didn’t get to shower. Again.
The cat slept on my work clothes & now they’re covered in hair. I didn’t realize the milk had soured until I took a sip.
Both kids are screaming at me.
My car didn’t start, so I was late to work.
I left my lunch at home & only have $3 until payday. The doctor had devastating news.
Why does he always poop in the bathtub?! Do all Moms only get 4 hours of sleep a night?
(I don’t understand why bill collectors want to be paid so bad.)
Houston traffic. Yay. We’ve watched The Little Engine That Could 4 times today! Can I afford to retire this year as planned?
I used to fix my hair & wear makeup more...
Let it all fade away with .
CHOCOLATE & WINE
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seriously y’all...
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relax
Chocolate stimulates the release of endorphins that generate feelings of pleasure and promotes a sense of well being. One of the ingredients in chocolate is tryptophan, an essential amino acid needed by the brain to produce serotonin. Serotonin is a mood-modulating neurotransmitter-the brain’s “happy chemical.” (medicalwellnessassociation.com) Wine does have a calming influence. Dinner being accompanied by a drink that aids in stress relief can help the mental transition between work and relaxation. Red wine also has more heart-healthy benefits than other types of alcohol by cotaining more antioxidants and helping to increase high-density lipoprotein cholesterol; HDL-the “good” cholesterol. (mayoclinic.org)
Allymac Concepts and Momology Magazine is not advocating the abuse of alcoholic beverages This material is general in nature. It is made available on the understanding that Allymac Concepts and Momology Magazine is not thereby engaged in rendering professional advice. Before relying on the material in any important matter, users should carefully evaluate its accuracy, currency, completeness and relevance for their purposes, and should obtain any appropriate professional advice relevant to their particular circumstances. Consuming alcohol while pregnant, with certain medications, or with a known alcohol abuse problem is never suggested.
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