February 2012 Bridal Edition

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ABASH VALLE

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FEBRUARY 2012 $1.00 PLUS TAX

LIFE IN ADAMS, JAY & WELLS COUNTY

ANNUAL BRIDAL GUIDE REAL WEDDING STORIES FROM LOCAL COUPLES!

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CAPTURE THE MOMENT GET THE MOST OUT OF YOUR WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY

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Publication

Editor................................... Amy M. Orr Contributors........Sharyl M. Calhoun Cody Neuenschwander

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

Advertising...............Raelene Hirschy

Vol. 4, No. 2, February 2012 © Wabash Valley Living, 2012. Published monthly. Printed in USA by EP Graphics, Inc.

FEBRUARY 2012 We are SO excited to bring you our THIRD annual bridal issue! This is always such a fun issue to put together—the wedding stories are happy and heart-warming!

This month, we’re sharing real-life wedding stories from three local couples. We think you’ll enjoy reading about Dusty & Chelsea Guggenbiller, of Portland, Michael & Erica Bennett, of Geneva, and Carson & Ashley Sprunger, of Berne.

Unfortunately, there just isn’t room in this issue to include ALL the details from these weddings. But, we have posted additional photos and details from each special day on our website—http://wabashvalleyliving.com.

For all the brides-to-be reading this issue, we’ve also included a helpful article on engagement and wedding photography. Our featured expert offers advice on choosing the right photographer and getting the right angles to accurately capture your special moments.

And, finally, for the grooms-to-be, our new student intern has included an article about your role in the wedding planning. He’s gotten advice from three young men who have recently said “I do” to help you prepare for your wedding day.

If you find this issue helpful as you plan your wedding, please tell us! You can post on our Facebook page or send an email to: amyorr@wabashvalleyliving.com Thank you for continuing to support our publication and area businesses through your purchase of Wabash Valley Living!

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ONTENTS FEBRUARY 2012

IN THIS ISSUE: 4

SCHOOL NEWS Monthly Column

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FEBRUARY FEATURE ARTICLE Capture the Moment

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BRIDAL BONUS FEATURE Wedding Vendor Section

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WORD SEARCH CHALLENGE Monthly Contest

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FEBRUARY FEATURE ARTICLE Marital Bliss Begins

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FEBRUARY FEATURE ARTICLE Groom to Groom

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BRIDAL BONUS FEATURE Wedding Vendor Section

28

FIND FRIEDRICH Monthly Contest

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BRIDAL BONUS FEATURE Wedding Vendor Section

ON THE COVER

COVER PHOTO: Ashley Sprunger, Courtesy of

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School Notes An Educational Journey to Adulthood Students at the high school level are journeying through adolescence to adulthood. Many changes are going on in their bodies and minds; thus the teenage years can be very challenging.

Students who follow The 5 Be’s have proven to be successful at school. SAHS wants all students to be successful and understand that these five keys are crucial for success in school and life.

At SAHS (South Adams High School), we do our very best to help students navigate through these transitions while keeping them focused on the job at hand, which is to get each student an education and a high school diploma. We work hard to prepare SA students for their next phase in life, whether that is college or a career.

We are excited about what is currently happening at South Adams High School!

We have just completed one of our best years ever, in terms of test scores and graduation rate.

Our staff and guidance department do a wonderful job guiding our students through this process. Our goal is for each student to become a “responsible and productive citizen” in life. We know that a solid education is vital for this to happen.

An area that we consistently focus on at SAHS is training on The 5 Be’s for being successful. These are: 1. “Be Here!”

2. “Be On Time!”

3. “Behave!”

We have more opportunities for students to receive college credit for courses than ever before through dual credit, vocational, and AP courses. Not only can excellence be observed in academics but also in our music, sports, Dots in Blue Water Project, FFA, and vocational programs.

We continue to fine-tune our strategies, implement programs, and work diligently to help make SAHS the best that it can be.

And, we desire to continually partner with families and the community to persist in this excellent endeavor.

Thank you for participating with us as we all work towards promoting excellence on the journey!

4. “Be Prepared!” (Do your homework.)

5. “Be Involved!” (Join a sport, music group, or club.)

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Trent Lehman,

SA High School Principal

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RCAPTURE THE MOMENT Engagement & Wedding Photos

by Sharyl M. Calhoun

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bride should plan to leave any last minute details of her wedding in the hands of a carefully-chosen few. As she glides down the aisle, she is blissfully unaware of the artfully-arranged flowers, the flickering candelabra, or all the guests, craning their necks to catch a glimpse of her.

She scarcely notices the little flower girl strewing petals in her path. Her eyes are eagerly searching for the admiring gaze of her groom, and he breaks into an answering smile. Without an experienced photographer to preserve the occasion, the bride and

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groom would miss so much of their own wedding.

Amy Sprunger, owner of Amy’s Photography, knows how it feels to be a love-struck bride on her wedding day.

“My husband (Toby) and I have been married for eleven years. We attended different schools, but I developed a huge crush on him after attending a bridal shower at his mother’s house. I saw his photo on the wall and knew he was the guy for me. He never knew that I existed until fifteen years later, when my brother (Tom Frye) and sister-in-

law (Lisa) said they had a guy they wanted to introduce me to.

cathedral or smallest church I still get goose bumps. It is a magical moment.”

“Little did they know that I already knew who he was—and little did I know that my secret crush from high school would actually be my forever love. I didn’t tell Toby about the crush until we had dated a few months.

We met and married in less than a year. I wouldn’t have done it any other way.

“I have always enjoyed my jobs, very much,” she adds, “but no job has held a candle to the love and passion that I have for photography.”

“I can’t recall the exact time I became interested in photography because, as long as I can remember, it is what I wanted to do. When I was a child I always had a camera in my hand. My first class in photography was through 4-H, when I was in elementary school. My great-grandfather was a photographer. Although I never knew him, I think that my photography skills were inherited from him.”

Amy graduated from Jay County High School and attended college in Huntington, Indiana.

“I have worn a few hats over the course of my life. My very first job was waitressing when I was 16. The people skills that I learned have been a valuable tool, to this day. During college I pursued radio broadcasting. I worked in that field in Fort Wayne for 11 years. I was also a booking agent for Cherie Adams, a Christian singer in Nashville, formerly of Avalon.”

By 2000, Amy had lost her enthusiasm for broadcasting. She decided to turn a lifelong hobby with cameras into a full-fledged photography business.

“I shot my first wedding in 2000, right before Toby and I were married,” recalls Amy. “From that day on, I was hooked on weddings. I still feel the same way, 225 weddings later. They bring me so much joy and I love shooting every detail of them. I get goose-bumps every time a bride comes down the aisle. Whether it is in the biggest

Amy’s picture-taking business grew into a successful entity, and in 2009 she filed papers to become an LLC (“limited liability” corporation). Amy says that, being more artistically-minded, she relies on her accountant to keep her updated with the necessary paperwork associated with being a business owner.

“I couldn’t think of anything cute or creative to call my business, so it is simply Amy’s Photography, LLC. My husband was my biggest encourager in the process. He has been there from day one of the business.

Making the government happy is a vital part of being a business owner,” she explains.

Her camera is one accessory that Amy rarely leaves behind. Although she has not had professional training in photography, she attends seminars “to keep fresh on the latest trends,” admitting these are often related to business, rather than “the fun side” of photography.

“I think it goes back to having inherited some skills and, also, from having a genuine passion for photography. Something that is VERY important to me is creating beautiful images with my camera. I measure the light at every location with a light meter and set my camera according to those numbers.

I believe photography is created with a camera, not on a computer.

“After each photo session, I upload the images to my computer. I look at each and every image. If needed, I will make minimal adjustments to the files. I like my images to look natural. There are certain times when I will add an affect to an image— but only if I feel it would enhance the image and not distract from it.

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“I love capturing a vision inside my camera and seeing people smile when they view the end result. I’ve had people tell me that I made them look like a ‘super model.’ My intention isn’t to photograph America’s Next Top Model, but I love it when I can strike confidence in people—they see how beautiful they truly are.

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“I can always find the beauty in a person when I look through my lens. There are a lot of people who feel unlovely on the outside.

They come to their session feeling nervous or awkward. But those are the same people who leave with a spring in their step and a new found confidence.”

Amy says that weddings and engagements are her specialty. However, sessions with high school seniors are always “so much fun,” she says. “Of course I adore the little people that I photograph too. I always try to do something new and different. I create new sets to make the sessions fun, colorful and memorable.”

“The most frustrating aspect of my job is when people have expectations that I can’t meet. The best example I can give is when I’m called to do photos of an extended family that includes several small children. I know that they are envisioning a Hallmark card, but it isn’t reality. The reality is that there will be children crying or not paying attention, and an adult who could care less about the photo and doesn’t want to be there.

The person who has hired me is expecting a beautiful photo. I promise to do my best, but I can’t force a child to stop fussing or a grumpy participant to smile.”

Tips for Engagement Photos Amy gives a complimentary engagement session to anyone who books a wedding with her. This photo session allows her the opportunity to become acquainted with the couple before the wedding.

“It also helps me know how they interact with one another. Some couples are super kissy and love being affectionate in front of the camera. Others do not go for the public display of affection. These are things that are good to know.”

Tips for Wedding Photos A recent trend emerging for wedding ceremonies is one that Amy discourages. In order to allow guests to see the faces of the bride and groom throughout the ceremony, the pastor officiates from the floor.

“As a wedding photographer, my style is to stay as far back as possible so that I am not a distraction. I use my zoom lens to get those nice close shots. When the pastor stands with his backside to the audience, the close-up ceremony photos end up being of his backside.”

“The feedback that I have heard from wedding couples who have had this scenario at their weddings is that they were more nervous by seeing their guests from the stage. If your pastor suggests this, please consider asking him for traditional staging for the ceremony. I would much rather have the back of your wedding dress in photos, than the back of the pastor’s suit.”

Amy also recommends that the bride and groom be allowed a few private moments together, prior to the wedding ceremony.

And this may be an ideal time for taking photographs of the wedding party. While some insist it is bad luck for the groom to catch a glimpse of his bride before the wedding, Amy cites good reasons for breaking from tradition.

“I love shooting in all seasons. Winter is a gorgeous time for engagement photos. I love cute winter coats, scarves and boots for photos. I recommend clothing that isn’t too tight, because it isn’t flattering on most figures. Also, couples should save their tennis shoes for the gym and wear something dressier on their feet for photos.

It just looks better!”

Amy has used a variety of settings and locations for engagement pictures. But she cautions, just because a yard has lovely landscaping or a pond seems to be a romantic backdrop, does not mean they are ideal settings for photographs.

“When shooting in new locations,” she explains, “I always look for optimal natural light. When there isn’t enough light or there is too much light, I always look for a new spot.”

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“Seeing one another has a way of relaxing the bride and groom before the ceremony. It also allows for a much faster photo session.

Although the day is about the couple, it is also nice to consider your guests and the amount of wait time they have after the ceremony.

“Generally the receiving line takes about 40 minutes. Adding another 40-45 minutes of post-wedding photos causes a long wait for guests.

“When having a ‘first look’ at each other before the wedding, I always create a special scenario, so that it is just the bride and groom who share that moment.

“In reality those few minutes alone are often the only actual ‘alone time’ the couple gets all day. It truly is a special moment for the couple, and doesn’t take away any of the magic of the walk down the aisle.”

Choosing a Photographer When asking someone to take pictures of your wedding, you are entrusting them with memories that should attest to your love, for the generations to come. Sadly, inexperienced photographers often make mistakes that rob newlyweds of those irretrievable moments.

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Amy offers these suggestions for choosing a photographer:

1. Consider the quality of work.

Ask to see the finished product. I have several albums and books that I share with my couples during their wedding consultation so that they have a vision of what their album will look like.

2. Consider the personality.

Your wedding photographer will be with you more than any other wedding vendor. Make sure your personality meshes with the photographer.

3. Ask about backup equipment.

In the event of equipment failure, the photographer needs to be prepared.

4. Avoid regrets.

Over the years I have heard many people say their biggest regret was that they let a friend or family member take their wedding photos.

Just because someone has a nice camera doesn’t mean they know how to take excellent wedding photographs.

You would never hire a caterer based on the fact that they have a nice stove.

“After a recent wedding, the mother of the bride told me that I fit right in with their day and that, while they always knew I was there, I wasn’t in anyone’s way and did a great job for them. This was a huge compliment.

“As a business owner, I feel it is important to ‘pay it forward’ for all the blessings my family and I have been given. One of my former grooms was the recipient of a heart surgery from the Larry King Cardiac Foundation, and I had the honor of photographing the fundraiser event in Fort Wayne.

“In addition, I am honored to be the photographer for the Northeast Indiana Easter Seals annual Dancing with the Arc Stars in Fort Wayne. This event features many of the Arc clients in a ballroom dancing competition.

“It is simply a joy to be part of the event.”

Trash the Dress “‘Trash the Dress’ is a concept that has become more popular over the last few years. The bride puts her wedding dress on after the wedding and indulges in a photo shoot that she would never have the chance to do on her wedding day.

“Last year I did a really fun trash the dress session with Michael and Lindsay Yoder on their first anniversary. The three of us headed to downtown Fort Wayne for their ‘Trash the Dress’ shoot, which included the couple getting into a fountain at Freimann Square, followed by eating their wedding cake and smashing it into each other’s face.

“It is a very fun session to do and one that I see becoming more popular this year.”

Amy and Toby have two children: Izzy, a second grader, and Cooper, a preschooler.

The Sprunger family resides in Berne.

Amy’s Photography, LLC

260-525-8285

www.amysphotography.typepad.com

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ARITAL BLISS BEGINS

Three Real-Life Wedding Stories

by Amy M. Orr Dusty & Chelsea

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helsea Gugenbiller, of Portland, says she and Dusty met in 2006 through mutual friends. They were friends for about a year before the relationship turned romantic. The pair dated for two-anda-half years before he proposed.

“We were at my parents’ house, and Dusty asked me to go for a walk, as we often did,” Chelsea recalls. “We walked for awhile before I said we should head back because it was getting dark.

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“As I was looking at the moon, I didn’t realize that he had let go of my hand, and when I turned around, he was down on one knee.

He asked me to marry him.”

and they carried white hydrangeas. The men wore black tuxes with matching blue vests and ties. Dusty wore a black tux, black vest and white tie.

Because Chelsea was in graduate school, the couple picked a summer date for their wedding—August 6, 2011. “Choosing a wedding date was easy,” she says.

Chelsea’s bouquet included blue Delphiniums, white hydrangeas and Asiatic lilies. Her all-white gown was accented by horizon blue shoes, tiara and earrings.

“The wedding planning was the best part!

My mom, stepmom, mother-in-law, and the bridesmaids helped a lot with the planning, along with Dusty.”

“My dad and stepmom had a company make bobble heads that looked exactly like Dusty and me,” Chelsea adds. “We set them out by our guest book, and we had many people comment on them.”

The bride-to-be and her intended settled on First Church of the Nazarene in Portland for their ceremony location. Chelsea explains, “This is not where we normally attend, but it is beautiful inside and very big—we were planning a larger ceremony.”

Dusty and Chelsea decided on eight bridesmaids and eight groomsmen, two ushers, two flower girls, and a ring bearer.

The wedding party included the bride and groom’s siblings and closest friends.

Chelsea found her wedding gown in Fort Wayne. “At my first appointment, I tried on five dresses,” she recalls. “We went to another shop, where I tried on one dress and fell in love. That was the one I got!”

When looking at bridesmaids’ dresses, Chelsea says there were three gowns that caught her eye. “All of us girls went up there on a Sunday, and they got to try the dresses on and help me pick out the one they liked and felt most comfortable in.

“A friend-of-a-friend made our invitations, programs, and signs. We e-mailed back and forth for about seven months. She incorporated our colors perfectly, and everything was beautiful.”

Chelsea wanted an elegant ceremony. The bridesmaids’ dresses were horizon blue,

Following the ceremony, Dusty and Chelsea held a reception at the Fort Recovery American Legion. Tables were decorated with the same colors and flowers from the ceremony.

“The reception was so much fun,” Chelsea says. “I don’t think Dusty or I left the dance floor with our family and friends. There was so much laughing.

“My advice for other ladies would be to not stress about the little things. Once it is over, it’s gone, and you just have the memories.

Have fun with it!”

Wedding Vendors:

Rings Bridal Gown Dresses Tuxes Catering Cake Photography Flowers

- Shane Company, Indianapolis; Kay

Jewelers, Muncie; Silvertowne, Winchester Wendy’s Bridal, Fort Wayne

- David’s Bridal, Fort Wayne

- Mr. Shoppe, Coldwater - Alice Post

- Elsie Timmerman - Amy Sprunger Photography, Berne

- Floral Reflections, Saint Henry

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Michael & Erica

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rica Bennett, a Wells County native, says she and Michael had known each other “pretty much our whole lives.”

They played together as young children but lost touch during grade school.

“We reconnected shen my brother-in-law and I threw my sister a surprise birthday party, and Michael came to it,” Erica explains.

The pair began dating during Erica’s senior year in high school and got engaged nearly two-and-a-half years later.

“The day that he picked up my ring, he was so excited to pop the question that he couldn’t wait,” says Erica. The pair took a ride through the woods on a four-wheeler.

When they stopped, Michael found some excuse to turn Erica’s attention to the fourwheeler.

She continues, “When I turned around, he was down on one knee with the most perfect ring ever. I screamed and said, ‘O my gosh, are you serious?’

“He laughed and said the ring wasn’t a fake.

I gave him a huge hug and said, ‘Yes!’” Erica wanted a wedding in autumn or winter, and Michael wanted to get married in the

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summer. The compromise was a springtime wedding—April 2, 2011.

Erica and her mother planned the wedding, and the bride recalls, “It was so much fun hanging out with her and doing everything together. We definitely got a lot closer.”

Erica chose Murray Missionary Church for the ceremony location. “Our church is too small,” she explains, “so we searched, and this church was just beautiful. We didn’t really even have to decorate.

“Our invitations were exactly what I wanted.

We had one of our engagement pictures on them in color with a black and white border.”

Erica says she and her mom stopped at a bridal shop for something else when she spotted her gown. “My mom could tell that I liked it, so she asked if I wanted to try it on.

I fell in love with it.”

Michael and Erica each had seven attendants. The ladies wore black dresses with lace overlay and pool blue ribbons and bows at the waist.

The groomsmen wore black tuxes and pool blue vests. Michael and the ring bearer wore black tuxes with white vests to match the bride’s gown.

Erica says, “My bouquet was mostly white, and it was beautiful. I chose to use mainly lilies because they are my favorite flower.”

One of Erica’s favorite memories was when she and Michael first saw each other on the day of the wedding. “I will never forget the

moment,” she says. “I still get butterflies in my stomach when I think about it.”

The reception was held at The Hayloft in Hoagland. “It worked out really well,” Erica reports. “They catered our meal and made our cake, which was beautiful and delicious.”

Erica concludes, “I wouldn’t do anything differently. It is definitely a night I know neither of us will ever forget.”

She advises other brides-to-be, “Have fun!

Don’t get too stressed out that you don’t enjoy yourself. It is one day that is truly about you, so enjoy it!”

Wedding Vendors:

Rings Bridal Gown Dresses Tuxes Invitations Catering Cake Photography Flowers

- Rogers & Hollands, Fort Wayne; Wal-Mart David’s Bridal, Fort Wayne

- David’s Bridal, Fort Wayne

- Men’s Wearhouse, Fort Wayne - Express Printing, Bluffton

,

- The Hayloft, Hoagland

- Amy Sprunger Photography, Berne

- Gebhart’s Floral Barn, Warren

Carson & Ashley

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shley and Carson Sprunger, of Berne, met while attending Bluffton University. Carson, a junior, spotted Ashley moving in at the start of her freshman year. He introduced himself to her online.

Eventually, they went to a movie together and “really it it off.” Ashley and Carson dated for about a year-and-a-half before he proposed.

When Carson met with Ashley’s parents, he intended to wait a couple more weeks before

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popping the question. But, after securing their blessing, he couldn’t wait any longer.

says Ashley, “so many of our choices were based on prices of the vendors.

Ashley recounts, “He had to drive home to get the ring and wouldn’t answer any of my phone calls all day. I was concerned but finally got a call from Carson that evening.

“We had invited 250 guests, and about 200 of them came to the wedding.”

“He asked if I could go to where we first met.

I went to the dorm and found a rose and a note.”

Carson sent Ashley on a scavenger hunt all around a path on campus where they had taken their first walk together. At the end of the hunt, Carson was waiting for Ashley inside the music building on campus.

Ashley had no idea what was coming until Carson got down on one knee, and she was so shocked she did not know what to say. When she finally said yes, they started the two-and-a-half year wait until Ashley graduated, and they could finally get married on June 11, 2011.

Ashley’s mother and future mother-in-law helped plan the wedding. Since the couple would be married in Berne, and Ashley wasn’t familiar with the area, Carson’s mom was able to offer more assistance.

According to the couple, the final wedding plans had a lot to do with costs. “We were trying to have a simple, yet elegant wedding,”

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Ths Sprungers decided to keep things simple and both chose a single attendant.

Ashley’s matron of honor was her sister, Emily, while Carson’s best man was his brother, Carter. “We wanted to have the ones beside us who had been and will be closest to us for the rest of our lives.

“Carson designed our invitations, and they were printed at EP Graphics in Berne.

We ordered champagne-colored metallic pearlescent cardstock online.”

Shopping in Fort Wayne, Ashley chose an ivory strapless gown with a champagnecolored sash across the bodice The matron of honor ordered a dress online.

“It was a deep purple strapless gown with a sash across it—much like my gown,” Ashley recalls.

The couple decided on suits for the men because the price was very similar to the cost of renting tuxes, but they could keep the suits. The menswear was also selected in Fort Wayne.

“We didn’t have a theme,” says Ashley. “Our colors were a deep purple and champagne.

“The ceremony was mostly traditional. We had Brad Byerly, of Bluffton, Indiana, play the piano, and Rob Kowalczyk, of Berne, was the vocalist.

“Carson’s parents sang a duet during the ceremony, as well. “ “We decided to hold our reception at First Mennonite Church in Berne—the same church where we had the ceremony. “They had just built a Family Life Center, and ours was the first reception held in it.”

Much of the food was prepared and served

by Sara Meyer and Barb Lehman, also from First Mennonite Church. However, Ashley’s parents prepared barbequed pork sandwiches and homemade ice cream for the reception.

Ashley and Carson ordered a three-tiered cake and two sheet cakes. The cakes had a champagne ribbon around each of the layers, again reflecting the style of the bride’s gown.

Ashley wisely advises other brides-to-be, “Don’t worry about all of the small details.

“It’ll all work out eventually—and, you may not even remember those details in a few months, anyway!

Wedding Vendors:

Rings Bridal Gown Dress Tuxes Invitations Cake Photography Flowers

- Richard’s Jewelry, Berne David’s Bridal, Fort Wayne

- TheLimited.com

- JC Penney, Fort Wayne - EP Graphics, Berne; PaperandMore.com

- Flo Golden, Portland - Amy Sprunger Photography, Berne

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RGROOM TO GROOM

Your Role in the Planning

by Cody Neuenschwander

Y

ou can ask just about any married person what the biggest day in their life was, and you’ll probably receive the same answer—their wedding day. Like it or not, weddings are a big deal.

Then again, why wouldn’t they be?

Weddings do, after all, symbolize the joining of two lives forever. And yet, weddings are typically viewed mostly as the bride’s big day.

After all, those dresses and coordinating colors aren’t typically considered to be a

22

guy’s forte. In fact, it can even prove to be downright intimidating.

So, if you happen to be a fellow, and if it just so happens to be that you’re tying the knot sometime soon, here is some advice to get you to, and through, your big day.

Bluffton natives Adam Neuenschwander, Paul Aschliman, and Joel Fiechter said “I do” to their respective brides at some point during the past year. These young men offer a few suggestions gathered from their wedding experiences so that you might be better prepared for your own.

The first question a groom might ask himself is, “Just what am I expected to do?” That’s a good question. What exactly is a groom expected to do during the planning process?

What a Girl Wants

Joel’s answer is similar, “I personally thought that I would not be overly-involved.”

But, what did he end up doing? “We did most of the planning together,” says Joel. “I helped with guest lists, invitations, menus, and wherever else they needed me.”

When asked what he thought the groom’s responsibility in the planning department would be, Adam says, “I thought the groom would stay out of it.”

A few grooms expect, or even hope to be included in the planning. “Actually, I was a lot less involved than I thought I would be,” admits Paul. “I had a list of five things to do, and she had half a page.”

This groom probably sums it up best when he says, “I learned girls have had these planned for a long time.”

Choose Wisely

In this instance, the expectation of the groom proved correct—the bride didn’t expect or desire much input from the groom during the planning. “Is this always the case?” you may wonder.

As a groom, one of the most important jobs you’re entrusted with is choosing your groomsmen. These guys should include your closest family and friends. How should you go about selecting your groomsmen?

It doesn’t hurt to involve some of the bride’s family. “I think it’s important, if possible, to include the bride’s family, because you marry the family, as well,” says Joel. “It’s important to have good relations with her family.”

Of course, the most important choice you have to make when choosing your groomsmen is selecting a best man. The best man should be your closest friend— “someone who would do anything for you,” as Paul puts it.

It sounds like a daunting task, so just how do you pick the best man to be your best man? “Don’t put too much thought into it,” says Adam, “go with your gut.”

Adam

Most would say a brother makes a perfect best man. But what if you don’t have a brother? “If it isn’t your brother, then it should be someone like a brother,” Paul offers.

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Mind Over Matter Okay, so you’ve selected your groomsmen and an awesome best man. But, no matter who’s backing you up, a wedding is still going to be intimidating. There are all those people watching you. You could trip. You could mess up your vows. All sorts of things could go wrong.

Probably the most important role a groom could play is a supportive one. “I found that throughout our engagement and on our wedding day, notes and cards encouraging her really helped,” says Joel.

“Listen and be supportive,” adds Adam.

Sometimes simple gestures like that can go a long way.”

What could you possibly do to keep your mind off all these things? Joel recalls, “I had to keep reminding myself that at the end of the day, I was still going to marry my best friend. It didn’t matter if I messed something up or jumbled my words.

“We were still going to get married. That took a lot of the pressure off, but nothing you do will completely get rid of it.”

Keep in mind, too, that it never hurts to just try to have a good time. “Have fun and laugh,” Paul recommends. “Get your mind of the pressure.” After all, laughter is the best medicine.

It’s an easy thing to get lost in your own fears and concerns. But don’t forget, too, that you’re only one part of the equation.

You might be nervous, but so is the bride.

“Pray for her…a lot,” says Paul. And while you’re at it, let her know that you’re thinking of her feelings.

24

Paul

Everybody’s different. It’s okay if you and your bride have differing opinions. “Just because your [personal] expectations aren’t met, that doesn’t mean it won’t be as good as you thought it would be,” Adam informs us.

The Last Word Any final, personal pieces of advice from these grooms? “Take yourself out of the equation and let God handle it,” says Adam.

“Seek God first and He’ll provide,” Paul reminds us.

“Just enjoy your day,” advises Joel.

Joel As with any other part of life, a smart groom will try to learn from the mistakes of others.

With that in mind, Paul warns, “Set your alarm clocks.” Very sound advice, indeed!

“Don’t get stressed out and forget what it’s all about.” Joel throws in, “It’s just one day out of the rest of your life, and you won’t remember a lot of the details, anyway.”

If your wedding day is going to be one of the most important days of your life, then you owe it to yourself to be prepared. Take your cues from grooms who’ve gone down the aisle before you.

Hopefully, the advice these three grooms have shared will help.

So, good luck, and enjoy your big day!

Congratulations!

Moments by Pam Photography www.momentsbypamphotography.com

25

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