BEFORE YOU GO
RETAIL RANDOMS
E E L I B U J M U N TAT-I With just over a week until the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee, patriotic punters are spoiled for choice when it comes to commemorative tat, with products at every price point. Samsung’s Platinum Jubilee Fridge Freezer can be yours for only £999, for
example. You’d think it would’ve come in red, white and blue at that price. Amazing ly, the $75 Barbie Signature Queen Elizabeth II Platinum Jubilee Doll has already sold out, despite it looking
RUBBERNECKERS We received an email from Jane from China Tianjin Recare Co the other day. This, it must be said, was an unsolicited communication from the company, which has apparently been “specifically and reliably” manufac-
turing latex condoms for more than 25 years. Now, you wouldn’t think there was a great deal of new product development going on in the world of barrier contraception, but Jane was reaching out to tell us about Recare’s latest innovation: wine condoms. To clarify, that’s not
wine-flavoured condoms but condoms for wine.The patented johnnies, which the company says are both “funny and practical,” are deployed as one imagines over the necks of opened bottles and perform the same anti-oxidative function as a traditional wine stopper, albeit in a slightly more snigger-inducing fashion.
more like Helen Mirren than the real deal, while the £12.99 Lego minifigure impressively replicates our monarch’s trademark helmet hair. As does Aldi’s The Queen Kevin the Carrot, which sees the discounter’s much-put-upon vegetable don some lippy and a Chairman Maostyle outfit to grace shelves at £3.99. And if you’re planning a party, look no further than Amazon’s bunting – which showcases Her Majesty’s impressive hat collection. It should be right up your street. Be warned though, it just won’t be very far up your street, costing £12.99 for a miserly three metres.
WEDNESDAY 25TH MAY 2022/ ISSUE 106 / SLRMAG.CO.UK I 37
