Maternity & Infant August/September 2015

maternity & infant

AUGUST/SEPTEMBER 2015 €3.75/£3.30 AUGUST SEPTEMBER 2015 ISSUE 52

CAR SPECIAL Choosing a family car & the best car seats

WE’VE GOT THE WHOLE FAMILY COVERED!

MODERN FAMILIES Can children

thrive in same-sex relationships?

90 NEW SEASON BUYS

SCHOOL DAYS EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW TO START SCHOOL IN STYLE

www.maternityandinfant.ie

9 772009 193014

08

CAREE R CHANGE Blogging your way to a new job

PLUS ASK THE EXPERT * ANNABEL KARMEL * BEAUTY SECRETS MI Aug_Sept 2015_Cover.indd 1

27/07/2015 11:13

Design: Bjørn Refsum/Hilde Angelfoss, Design development in cooperation with K8 Industridesign AS, Product development in cooperation with Bård Eker Industrial Design AS.

The ultimate Connection stroller.

Stokke® Xplory® STYLE AWARDS 2014

WINNER Best buggy design

stokke.com

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1 AUGUST/SEPTEMBER 2015

Contents On the Cover 40

Win!

61

STARTING SCHOOL How do you prepare your little one for “big” school?

And what do you do if things don’t entirely go

A FAMILY BREAK IN

BRIDGE HOUSE HOTEL, TULLAMORE, CO OFFALY! PAGE 77

to plan? We look at all you need to know about starting school, including a guide to buying uniforms and packing a lunchbox.

46

32

PRODUCT GUIDE: CAR SEATS Continuing our new series of practical guides to some of the biggest purchases you’ll make as prospective parents, we take a look at car seats and choose our favourite buys.

50

FAMILY CARS Expanding family = bigger

Style

car? Read on for our guide to choosing the right

32

family car for you and your

MATERNITY From comfy officewear

little ones.

with a bump to stealing Katherine Jenkins’ pregnancy style, we have

36

your maternity fashion covered.

36

BABY & CHILD Pre-school picks, school accessories and autumn favourites – your guide to

maternity & infant

62

dressing your little ones in

MODERN FAMILIES

style!

The traditional family unit is AUGUST/SEPTEMBER 2015 €3.75/£3.30 AUGUST SEPTEMBER 2015 ISSUE 52

CAR SPECIAL Choosing a family car & the best car seats

WE’VE GOT THE WHOLE FAMILY COVERED!

MODERN FAMILIES Can children

thrive in same-sex relationships?

90 NEW SEASON BUYS

SCHOOL DAYS EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW TO START SCHOOL IN STYLE

www.maternityandinfant.ie

9 772009 193014

08

CAREE R CHANGE Blogging your way to a new job

PLUS ASK THE EXPERT * ANNABEL KARMEL * BEAUTY SECRETS

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Contents.indd 1

70

undergoing huge changes

Want your make-up to last

at present, but what are the implications for children?

BEAUTY IN A FLASH

74

all day? Or a quick face you

BLOGGING

Psychologist Dr Nicola

Clever career move or

Davies looks at the results

interesting hobby? Why

of some recent studies on

blogging might just blag

modern families.

you the job of your dreams.

can put on in minutes?

We’ve got the answers.

73

YOU How to wear this season’s hottest skirt.

27/07/2015 14:17

2 AUGUST/SEPTEMBER 2015

Contents

70 Opinion 28

MUMMY MY WAY One reader tells us why she thinks motherhood shouldn’t spell the end of her career ambitions.

53

THE BREAST ADVICE Cliodna Gilroy on why

Experts

breastfeeding isn’t the only

76

65

88

way to bond with your

80

ASK THE FERTILITY EXPERT

baby.

81

ASK THE OBSTETRICIAN

DAD’S DIARY

82

ASK THE DIETITIAN

Nick Wilkinson tells us how

83

ASK THE PHYSIO

her daughter is handling

84

ASK THE SLEEPING EXPERT

big occasions. Rather well,

85

ASK THE GP

it seems…

86

DIRECTORY OF USEFUL CONTACTS

BLOG WE LOG What made us laugh or cry in blogland this month

Regulars

Features 22

BURNING TOPIC: RELIGION & SCHOOLS

6

M&I ONLINE

9

WHAT’S ON Our brand-new guide

20

Ireland’s primary schools are still overwhelmingly linked

to the essential dates for your diary this August/

with religion. Our question

September

this issue is: would you

44

54

11

NEWS

baptise your child just to get

All the latest news, reviews

him/her into school? Should

and products

we have more non-religious 56 options?

MUSIC AND THERAPY We take a look at music

AWARDS 2015

YOUR PREGNANCY PERSONALITY

therapy and how it can

The latest news from the

Can pregnancy change your

help you and your baby in

2015 Boots maternity &

actual personality? And can

pregnancy and beyond.

infant Awards! Have you

you recognise yourself in one 58 of our common pregnant

CHILDHOOD PHASES

voted yet?

guises? Read on!

but those phases seem to

TWIN-TO-TWIN ADVANCES

go on forever! Here’s how

Find out how a team of

to deal with the common

What is the right age to

talented Irish surgeons is

but awkward phases

start toilet training your

BRIDGE HOUSE HOTEL!

spearheading a procedure

tiny tots go through,

toddler? This is your

This fabulous prize is the

that is saving babies

from refusing to eat to

no-nonsense guide to

perfect treat for all the

diagnosed with twin-to-twin

wanting to do everything

handling this big life

family!

transfusion syndrome.

themselves!

change.

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Contents.indd 2

26

“Oh, it’s just a phase…” –

65 61

BOOTS MATERNITY & INFANT

ANNABEL KARMEL Recipes to liven up a

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW

lunchbox

ABOUT… TOILET TRAINING 77

78

WIN A FAMILY BREAK IN THE

STORE DIRECTORY

27/07/2015 15:52

BT Baby Monitors Your total baby sleep solution

BT Video Baby Monitor 7500 Lightshow

Soothing projected lightshow Pan, tilt and zoom video

BT Digital Baby Monitor 300

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19 Lullabies White noise generator Womb sounds Talk back to your baby Nightlight

BT Digital Video Baby Monitor 1000

27/07/2015 24/07/2015 10:24 21/07/2015 11:36 17:08

4 EDITOR’S LETTER

Welcome Our August/September issue is traditionally our Starting School/Back to School issue, but this year I have to admit to having a bit of a vested interest in our school editorial – my eldest child, four-year-old Danny, is starting “big school” this September. Our summer has been a whirlwind of uniform buying, teacher meeting, crèche graduating and potential new friend making. We’re now at the stage when I have to hide the new schoolbooks (is every one’s child excited about the prospect of homework or just mine?) and threaten to bring his new wheelie schoolbag back to the shop (he’s already driven it over his little sister’s toes three times). September will never come, according to Danny.

However, for those of us preparing to send our little ones to school, September will come all too soon, and I’m sure I’m not the only mother out there who is feeling rather emotional about the transition. To this end, we chatted to psychologist Alison Bough about weathering the change successfully – she

THE TEAM

has tips on p40 for both children and parents!

Plus, we round up all the latest and greatest uniform items and look at how to create packed lunches that will be eaten.

Still on the school theme, those of you with babies and younger children will be interested in our Burning Topic feature this issue – would you baptize your children in order to get a place in school? See our survey results on p22. Plus we have all the latest maternity and children’s fashion for the new season ahead, and a special on family cars and children’s car seats – essential reading if your family is growing rapidly!

Finally, we have the latest news from the 2015 maternity & infant Awards on p26 – have you voted for your favourite product yet?

Enjoy the issue and don’t forget to keep in touch via Facebook and Twitter.

Penny Gray

Editor: Penny Gray Editorial Assistant: Rachel Murray Intern: Jane Quinn Editorial Manager: Mary Connaughton Creative Director: Jane Matthews Design: Jennifer Reid Photography & Illustrations: Getty Images, Thinkstock Production Manager: Mary Connaughton Sales Director: Paul Clemenson Email editorialdesk@ashville.com or write to maternity & infant, Ashville Media, Old Stone Building, Blackhall Green, Dublin 7; Tel: (01) 432 2200; Web: www.maternityandinfant.ie All rights reserved. Every care has been taken to ensure that the information contained in this magazine is accurate. The publishers cannot, however, accept responsibility for errors or omissions. Reproduction by any means in whole or in part without the permission of the publisher is prohibited. © Ashville Media Group 2014. All discounts, promotions and competitions contained in this magazine are run independently of maternity & infant. The promoter/advertiser is responsible for honouring the prize.

ISSN 2009 1931

Find us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter

Editor

MY PICKS THIS ISSUE 21

36

37

INDOOR ACTIVITIES

COSY KNIT

LUNCH ACCESSORY

The summer of 2015 will not go down in memory as one of the better ones – and it’s not over yet! Which is why I’ve prepared for the rainy days by investing in some activity books – worth every penny! Wipe-Clean

My two year old, Ellie, is starting Junior Montessori in September, and needs some smart but warm new items to take her into winter. This knit dress from Next, from €21, can be worn with a long-sleeve vest underneath

Whatever happened to good ol’ Tubberware? But maybe a fancy lunchbag like this Spider-Man offering from Easons, €12.99, will make ham sandwiches look all the more appealing! Danny seems to think so!

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Now with Pebble Plus The first i-Size compliant infant carrier

New

New 2wayFamily The best safety for children; i-Size (R129) certified and rear facing travel up to the age of 4

Pebble Plus

2wayPearl

Rearward facing

Rearward facing

Birth to approx.

Approx. 6 months

12 months

to 4 years Forward facing 15 months to

The 2wayFamily offers a complete i-Size solution from birth to 4 years and consists of the 2wayFix Base, new Pebble Plus infant carrier and 2wayPearl toddler seat. The new Maxi-Cosi Pebble Plus is the first infant carrier complying with i-Size (R129). It comes with a new high tech impact-absorbing material in the top side wings, resulting in enhanced side protection and improved safety performance. It includes a new baby-hugg inlay for a better fit and comfort for a newborn. Find out more at www.maxi-cosi.co.uk/2wayFamily

approx. 4 years

2wayFix Base

The 2wayFamily complies to the i-Size (R129) regulation and therefore is the safest choice. i-Size car seats fit most IsoFix cars. Find out more on

Birth to approx.

www.maxi-cosi.co.uk/i-size

4 years

2wayPearl awards

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6 ONLINE

E ,T

AND APPROVE D ED BY ST

THIS WEEKEND

P

Go to maternityandinfant.ie/lifestyle/out-about for a weekly update on family events nationwide.

Make the most of the summer holidays before peace and tranquillity returns in the form of the school day.

We cannot wait for order to be restored!

A

VO TE

S NT RE

D

maternityandinfant.ie Vote for your favourite product today font is helvetica Neue 95 Black, 54pt WWW.MATERNITYANDINFANT.IE

#bootsmiawards2015

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Tweet us

18/06/2015 16:02

Tweet us a pic of these wobblers appearing in every Boots store around the country and you could win a hamper packed to the brim with luxury baby goodies from Boots.

Get snapping, it’s that simple... twitter.com/maternityinfant

HEATH CENTRE

CONNECT

CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF US? WRITE OR EMAIL MATERNITY & INFANT, OLD STONE BUILDING, BLACKHALL GREEN, DUBLIN 7.

EDITORIALDESK@ASHVILLE.COM FACEBOOK.COM/MATERNITYANDINFANT TWITTER.COM/MATERNITYINANT

maternity & infant’s health centre has lots of advice on everything from colic, nappy rash and cradle cap to what to expect from your Public Health Nurse and how to get an appointment with a specialist health professional. www. maternityandinfant.ie/baby/healthcentre

WHAT’S TRENDING? #THELIESWETELLKIDS “I’ll come play in a little bit...”#TheLiesWeTellKids @BrutallyHonest4 “We’ll come back later and buy it.” #TheLiesWeTellKids @bitchim danny

EXPERT ADVICE

Over the next month we’ll have expert blog posts from Dr Koso-Thomas, who will be sharing her top tips on sleep as part of Colief’s online health clinics.

Caroline Brown from mummystummy. com will have all you need to know on preparing for birth, and Dublin’s favourite well-being hub, The Elbow Room, will be posting about everything from meditation, restorative yoga and avoiding back pain in pregnancy.

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VOTE TODAY

maternityandinfant.ie/ products/vote font is helvetica Neue 95 Black, 54pt

Vote today for your family’s number one products in this year’s Boots maternity & infant Awards and be in with a chance of winning €1,000 worth of products! Don’t forget to give your local crèche a vote while you’re there too!

“Honey, when you’re an adult you’ll understand!” Absolute lie.

Us adults still don’t understand. #TheLiesWeTellKids @HellOnHeelsGirl “I don’t have any games on my phone.” #TheLiesWeTellKids @gregpizarrojr “Someday you’ll grow up and no one can tell you what to do anymore.” #TheLiesWeTellKids @AJBulldis “I saw that because I have eyes in the back of my head.” #TheLiesWeTellKids @whoawhut

27/07/2015 15:31

The product most recommended by pharmacists for scars and stretch marks.

Retail pharmacist study, 2013

UK’s No.1 selling scar & stretch mark product.

“The one thing my pregnant friends and I discussed at length was stretch marks once you’ve got them, they’re there for good! I used Bio-Oil throughout, morning, noon and night... in fact, I haven’t stopped using it since Liam’s birth. Now that I’m pregnant with twins, I’m going to be using it more than ever!

What’s also nice is that it’s not oily. You’ve no idea how many friends and family I’ve told about Bio-Oil!”

IRI, 2015

Tracy with Liam

Bio-Oil® helps reduce the possibility of pregnancy stretch marks forming by increasing the skin’s elasticity. It should be applied twice daily from the first trimester. For comprehensive product information, and details of clinical trials, please visit bio-oil.com. Bio-Oil is available at pharmacies and selected retailers at the recommended selling price of €10.99 (60ml). Individual results will vary.

Distributed in the UK and the Republic of Ireland by Godrej Consumer Products (UK) Ltd.

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27/07/2015 25/06/2015 11:37 10:44

Home is the place where memories are made.

There are 5,000 people homeless in Ireland. One in seven people accessing homeless services is a child. By remembering Focus Ireland in your Will, you can provide more people with a place to call home, a place to create their own happy memories.

We understand that when making your Will, you’ll want to care for those closest to you first, but once you have, any contribution to Focus Ireland can make such a big difference. Please contact Pauline Costello in Focus Ireland, in complete confidence, on 01 881 5900. Thank you.

1850 204 205 www.focusireland.ie

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27/07/2015 27/05/2015 17:06 10:43

9 WHAT’S ON

Family Event Guide Enjoy the last of the summer holidays with these exciting family-friendly events taking place across the country this August and into September too!

FESTIVAL SEASON

1

ELECTRIC PICNIC, STRADBALLY HALL, CO LAOIS One of the biggest and best festivals returns from 4-6 September, and Soul Kids will be taking up residence once again in the Walled Gardens of Stradbally Hall. Soul Kids is a unique children’s area, and a celebration of nature, creativity and all things magical.

Remember, children aged 12 years and under must be pre-registered prior to the event. For more DON’T information go to www.

MISS! electricpicnic.ie/information/ family-info

2

KILKENNY ARTS FESTIVAL, KILKENNY

On 7-16 August, Kilkenny’s historic churches, castle, courtyards, townhouses and gardens offer a magical setting for unique collaborations and intimate encounters between audiences and artists.

The Festival has a good family programme this year, including the now popular light installation in the grounds of Kilkenny Castle, craft workshops and family theatre. For more information go to www. kilkennyarts.ie/programme/category/families

THE MOSCOW STATE CIRCUS, RDS, DUBLIN This year’s performance is based on the Russian folklore story of Cvetik-Semicvetik, or “the flower with seven colours”, by Benjamin Losin, where each of the petals represent a wish.

Runs 4-13 September; for more information go to www. moscowstatecircus.com.

DISCOVER IRELAND DUBLIN HORSE SHOW, RDS, DUBLIN Whether you want to see exciting horse classes, view international show jumping or you are just looking for a fun day out with family or friends, the Discover Ireland Dublin Horse Show, on 5-9 August, has something for everyone. For more information go to www.dublinhorseshow.com

r day tour, the journey begins

Literally! Consisting of a four-hou

story. or DUBLIN The Story Bus is a trip into the hanted places near Dublin, Cork THE STORY BUS, CORK, GALWAY AND the Fairy Story and discover an enc ally into telling. After that, you will step liter w.thestorybus.com. on the bus with interactive story re. For more information go to ww entu adv the of part as ” sion “mis a ll Galway where you will have to fulfi

THE SOUND OF MUSIC, BORD GÁIS ENERGY THEATRE, GRAND CANAL SQUARE, DUBLIN A brand-new production of the timeless musical classic comes to the Bord Gáis Energy Theatre from 17-29 August. Children under three are not permitted in the theatre; however, this would be a fantastic night out with older children. Tickets from €20. For more information go to www. bordgaisenergytheatre.ie.

COLOUR!, THE ARK, DUBLIN

COMING UP!

Step into The Ark this summer and experience a world full of Colour! You and your family will be guided through an interactive exhibition that explores creating and using colour in all its forms. You will produce your own colourful artwork with a professional artist. Runs until 23rd August. See www.ark.ie for more details.

DON’T MISS!

OTHER EVENTS WORTH CHECKING OUT INCLUDE Killybegs Festival: 7th-9th August, www.killybegs.wix.com/killybegs; Marlay Park Bat Walk: 28th August www.events.dlrcoco.ie/event/biodiversity-events and Waterford Harvest Food Festival: 11th-13th September http://www.waterfordharvestfestival.ie/

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27/07/2015 09:11

CASUAL SPORTS

Jog S Only et €21.9 5

acket Bomber J 95 Only €21.

Gillet Only €17.95

Inspired by a mix of college sports and bright street style with a fun attitude. Quirky characters and bold slogans add a cool edge to the season’s essentials. A bright colour palette of classic Red and white brought up to date with a dash of electric blue.

This collection is available in all stores and online at www.mothercare.ie now.

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9

11

M&I

ESSENTIALS: 9 THINGS

FOODS YOUR TODDLER SHOULD EAT EGGS Eggs are a great quick meal, as they are full of protein. Eggs also contain vitamin D, which helps the body absorb calcium.

PORRIDGE Oats provide kids with a steady stream of energy. Porridge with fruit is a great breakfast for all the family.

3

FULL-FAT MILK Growing kids need the protein and calcium in milk to help build their brains and keep their bones and teeth strong and healthy.

LEAN RED MEAT Young children who aren’t vegetarian should have iron-rich lean red meat twice a week. Serve with something containing vitamin C for absorption.

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VEGETABLES Your child won’t eat vegetables?

You’re not alone. The secret is to keep trying and offering different sorts. If all else fails, try a “hidden” vegetable tomato sauce.

BEANS Even regular (low-sugar) baked beans are good as they contain protein, fibre, iron and calcium. Or try adding other types of beans to sauces, stews and casseroles.

9

4

TOMATOES Tomatoes are full of lycopene, which protects against cancer. Cooking releases the lycopene and pairing with olive oil helps absorption.

FISH Fish contains heart-healthy omega-3 fats, which are great for brain development. Oily fish like salmon should be eaten once a week.

7

2

FRUIT Encourage your child to eat a rainbow of fruit, including bananas, oranges, strawberries and blueberries. Avoid fruit juices and instead give the whole fruit for fibre.

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Alicia silverstone wilfully ignores our list by raising her son, Bear, vegan

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27/07/2015 15:53

12 ESSENTIALS: PREGNANCY & NEW MUM

6

Strategies for Hiding your Pregnancy

TEA FOR TWO

Many women like to wait until 12 weeks before announcing their big news – but how do you hide your pregnancy for three whole months?

Try these strategies from women who have been there and done that.

1

Dilemma: you’re too tired to keep up with the running club “I’m a keen runner and I train

twice a week with a local women’s club. When I was pregnant with my first baby, I had really bad morning sickness for the entire first trimester, and my running pace suffered as a result. So I faked a small injury (a pulled muscle usually did the trick) and got my exercise fix through more gentle classes at the time of day that the morning sickness eased off. Then, when I was feeling better at about 14 weeks, I was able to tell everyone my news and keep running, albeit at a slower pace.”

Amy, mum to Henry, 2.

2

Dilemma: you’re heading to the pub

“I was dreading going to the pub, but determined that I wasn’t just going to avoid it for three months! Claiming antibiotics or driving works sometimes, but if you are a pub regular, eventually someone’s going to twig. So I worked out a drink that looked alcoholic but wasn’t – soda water and lime. No one guessed that I conveniently left the vodka out.”

Louise, mum of two

3

Dilemma: none of my clothes fit!

“I was one of those unfortunates who looked pregnant almost from the get-go – but I didn’t

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want to tell everyone until we had reached the 12-week mark. So I spent an hour going through my wardrobe and working out what would disguise my tummy best. The trick is to find things in your style and to avoid anything too tent-like (a definite giveaway!). Out went the tight tops and instead I pulled anything empire-line or loose to the front. I also invested in bellybands quite early on, and got an extra couple of weeks out of my regular jeans by looping a hair bobbin around the button. Finally, a trip to Penneys for some cheap loose tops, and I had everyone fooled.”

Jenny, mum to Elsa, 6 months

4

Dilemma: I’ve been invited to a party!

“Quite early on in my pregnancy, a friend had a huge party in her house and we all brought our own drink. I knew questions would be asked if I wasn’t drinking, so I got an empty screwtop wine bottle and filled it up with an alcohol-free version. No one noticed that it was open already and I kept it with me for the evening. Go for a red alcohol-free wine and you won’t run the risk of a helpful host wanting to put it into the fridge.”

Suzanne, mum to Jake, 1

5

Dilemma: I keep throwing up in work! “Morning sickness

is no joke, but when you’re in work

and trying to disguise what’s wrong with you, it can be an utter nightmare. I took a couple of days off when it started, tried to understand exactly what helped and what didn’t, and then when I went back to work, I had a whole ‘toolbox’ of remedies. In my case, it was crackers and sugar-free gum. I also factored in extra time if I had a meeting or appointment, as panicking over not knowing where the toilet was, or not having time to gather myself before a meeting made things ten times worse.”

June, mum of two

6

Dilemma: I have a full calendar of doctors’ appointments.

“I had a late miscarriage at 16 weeks, so when I was pregnant again, I was backwards and forward to the GP and the maternity hospital from very early on to check that things were progressing normally. I really didn’t want to tell anyone because of what happened last time, but the amount of doctor visits would be a complete giveaway. So I made a list of excuses to nip out of the office – dentist (I made this one cover two appointments – fillings and a follow-up!), waiting for a delivery and having to fix a flat tyre were three that I used.”

Jennifer, mum of twins

Once the preserve of the lady who lunches, afternoon tea has become quite the phenomenon in Ireland for all sorts of occasions.

Afternoon teas are also perfect for baby showers, and now in Dunboyne Castle in Co Meath, you can combine afternoon tea with a gorgeous spa break – and yes, it’s suitable for the pregnant lady too.

Celebrating Seoid Spa’s use of Aromatherapy Associates essential oil-based products, Dunboyne Castle’s themed Aromathera-tea complements the luscious aromas of these gorgeous treatments. Along with the selection of delicate finger sandwiches, and fresh baked scones with cream and preserves, the Aromathera-tea includes a delectable orange flower meringue pie, and a gorgeous lavender & poppy seed cake with ginger & white chocolate icing, served with a pot of tea or coffee or a selection of herbal teas.

Aromathera-tea costs €30 for two people, or you can choose a package that includes afternoon tea, unlimited use of the excellent thermal suite at Seoid Spa and a choice of three treatments: back massage with lavender, ginger, black pepper and rosemary; a luxurious facial with chamomile, rose and orange flower; or a stimulating juniper berry and pink grapefruit foot massage with spearmint gel. The Aromatheratea package costs €65 per person.

Or, make a night of it from €155 per person midweek including overnight stay, breakfast, dinner and the Aromathera-tea package.

Perfect for any sophisticated baby shower. Log on to www. dunboynecastlehotel.com for more details and to book.

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14 ESSENTIALS: BABY

HOW TO STIMULATE YOUR BABY’S SENSES Mums and occupational therapists Lynsey Sharp and Kathryn Horgan have developed a programme, Nurturing Newbies, to help parents develop their baby’s senses. Here they outline some simple ways you can help your baby’s senses develop As occupational therapists with over 15 years’ experience working with children, Lynsey Sharp and Kathryn Horgan commonly received referrals for children who experience difficulties with movement and sensory processing, which is impacting on their daily life. This led them to develop Nurturing Newbies, a course to educate parents and take a proactive preventative approach, rather than a reactive approach once problems have emerged.

“Our sensory system begins to develop in utero and it is the foundation for all other learning,” says Lynsey. “If there is a problem with one of the sensory systems it will impact on how we learn, develop and engage with our environment.

When a new baby moves, they begin to learn about themselves and their environment. For example, by bringing their hands and feet to their mouths they learn where their body begins and ends, that their hands and feet are attached to them and these experiences help to develop their body awareness and spatial awareness (proprioceptive sensory system). Through practice, this once jerky, uncontrolled movement will become more controlled and precise, preparing them for more challenging tasks such as bringing their spoon to their mouth.”

However, Lynsey maintains that it’s easy to use everyday opportunities to provide stimulation through movement and a sensory-rich environment. Try these easy tactics:

✹ A baby’s first playground is the floor. Allow them to lie on their backs and kick their legs. Use your hands, a rolled up towel or a soft toy for them to kick off and gain more feedback through their feet. Look at your baby, smile and give encouragement and see their delight at your responses to their movement.

Take their nappies and socks off and allow for more freedom of movement and also the increased sensation to their tactile sensory system. ✹ The physical contact and touch you share with your baby affects bonding and attachment. Touch, massage and cuddle your baby to create a positive bond and establish self esteem. Babies also use touch (the tactile system) to seek for food (rooting and suck reflex), for comfort and

reassurance and also to help discriminate between sensations such as hot/cold, hard/soft and pain/pleasure. Provide exposure to varying sensations they experience, for example, provide skin-to-skin contact, name the sensations they are feeling (“this blanket is soft and fluffy”), allow them to feel the grass or sand between their fingers and toes. ✹ Encourage and provide opportunities for tummy time. By lying your baby on their tummy they will gain more feedback through the front of their bodies, helping to build a ‘map’ of their front and back of their bodies and increase body awareness, which is essential for skills such as dressing. They will also begin to develop their extensor muscles and learn to hold their head up against gravity. Use a small toy or

a mirror to help motivate them to stay in this position. Initially they may not tolerate this position for long, so start with very short periods and build up. ✹ Recite nursery rhymes with your baby to bring in actions and movement in time to the music and rhythm. For example, whilst your baby is lying on their back, hold their legs and encourage a marching movement in time to the Grande Old Duke of York. The reciprocal movements of their legs will help to develop coordination.

The movement with music and rhythm can also have a positive effect on speech development. ✹ Take your baby for a walk in the buggy in the fresh air. By making use of the bumps on the path, weaving the buggy from side to side, changing the speed from fast to slow, you will provide stimulation to their balance system. Bring their awareness to other sensory experiences around them, such as; “ Can you feel the cold breeze on your face? Can you hear the birds sing?” By naming them and drawing awareness to them you are beginning to lay down the neural pathways.

Nurturing Newbies is a fun and educational programme from ICanKidz for parents and their babies from birth to 12 months. For more information or to book a place, contact info@icankidz. com or visit the website www.icankidz. com

SIMPLE SOLUTION

Many a mum’s heart has sank when they’ve been handed some essential medicine for their baby and they have to face the thricedaily battle of actually getting it into their baby’s system. So we have to hand it to Detinox and their clever new Medicine Dispenser, €10.11. Designed by a doctor, this clever little device allows your baby to passively suck the medicine through the orthodontic silicone teat. Or if you want to be sure it’s in the right place, you can deliver the full content of the medicine chamber simply and quickly using the unique plunger. Suitable from 3 months, the device (which features an orthodontic silicone teat and is BPA- and latex-free) can be washed and re-used again and again. Simple and clever, that’s how we like our baby inventions!

MI Aug_Sept 2015_News_Use This One.indd 14

27/07/2015 16:47

• r e n • W in font is helvetica Neue 95 Black, 54pt

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Recognise the healthcare professionals who have helped you and your family in the Boots maternity & infant People Awards

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27/07/2015 14:23

16 ESSENTIALS: HEALTH

FOLIC ACID: ARE YOU TAKING IT?

GOING GREEN

New research indicates that three out of four Irish women were not taking folic acid supplements before they were pregnant – which may explain our high rate of Neural Tube Defects like Spina Bifida. Here’s why we ALL should be taking folic acid supplements, pregnant or not.

Ireland has a particularly high incidence of Spina Bifida and other Neural Tube Defects (NTDs), yet a simple folic acid supplement can help reduce the risks significantly – so why aren’t Irish women taking the advice? Speaking at a new campaign by safeFood to highlight the issue, Prof Michael Turner, UCD Professor of Obstetrics and Gynaecology at the Coombe Hospital, said: “We know from recently published Irish research that three out of four women who attend for antenatal care have not taken folic acid supplements before they become pregnant. Taking folic acid daily as a supplement could potentially prevent two thirds of NTDs every year – on average, that’s approximately 50 fewer babies affected every year.” To help clear up any misconceptions about folic acid and NTDs, safeFood answers our FAQs.

When should I take it?

All women of child-bearing age should be taking a supplement containing folic acid. To help reduce the risk of NTDs, it’s important to take a folic acid supplement for three months before you get pregnant and for the first three months of your pregnancy. As up to half of all pregnancies are unplanned, it’s safer to take folic acid even if you’re not planning a baby. In the first few weeks of pregnancy, when you mightn’t even realise you’re pregnant, your baby’s brain and spine are developing, which is when they need the folic acid.

What is folic acid?

Folic Acid is a water-soluble vitamin that helps our tissues to grow and the cells in our bodies work. It has many functions, including helping

MI Aug_Sept 2015_News_Use This One.indd 16

1

Dark Leafy Greens Full of vitamins, minerals and fibre, leafy greens like kale and spinach are thought to protect against many cancers and promote heart health.

to form red blood cells and helping to break down, use and create new proteins. It is also essential for the production of DNA, which carries our genetic information.

How much should I take?

All adults need 200 micrograms per day for normal body maintenance and we can get this from eating a healthy, balanced diet. Women need an extra 400 micrograms of folic acid in early pregnancy and because it’s impossible to get this extra amount from a healthy balanced diet, we should be taking it in supplement form. If you want to take a multivitamin containing folic acid, make sure that it contains 400mcg of folic acid and that the supplement is suitable for pregnancy.

What is an NTD? NTDs, or neural tube defects, happen when part of the unborn baby’s brain or spine doesn’t develop properly. Spina bifida is the most common NTD and

means “split spine”. The spinal cord and surrounding bones (vertebrae) do not develop correctly and a gap or split occurs in the spine. The spinal cord may also be damaged. A whopping 70 per cent of NTD cases can be prevented by taking a daily folic acid supplement.

In some cases, there are other reasons why NTDs occur.

2

Asparagus As well as being loaded with nutrients, asparagus contains contains asparagine, which serves as a natural diuretic, helping heart-related diseases like high blood pressure.

Do I have to take it every day?

Folic acid is water-soluble, and any left over leaves the body in your urine. So if you do not take folic acid for even a few weeks, the amount in your blood can become very low.

Can I get enough from my food?

You can get a basic level of folic acid from your food, but it’s impossible to get it in the quantities needed to help reduce the risk of NTDs – which is why all women of child-bearing age should be taking a supplement to make sure they’re covered at all times.

3

Avocado Avocado is a rich source of monounsaturated fat, which is good for lowering cholesterol. These fats are also great for your skin and joints, protecting against arthritis.

27/07/2015 10:04

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27/07/2015 06/03/2015 11:43 10:16

18 ESSENTIALS: KIDS

HOW CAN I STOP MY CHILD FROM SWEARING? Just dropped the f-bomb in front of your toddler after years of being careful?

You can be sure that he/she has heard it and will be repeating it ad infinitum!

Here’s how to nip it in the bud…

You’re got to hand it to small kids.

They take everything in, and know instinctively when to ask the most awkward questions and what parts of your adult conversation they should relay to complete strangers to cause the maximum amount of embarrassment. They also know instinctively when you’ve slipped up and said a swear word. Even if you don’t draw attention to it by slapping your hand over your mouth, they know straightaway that they’re going to get great attention by swearing in public.

So how do you put things right?

Read on for our tried-and-tested strategies.

ARTY PICKS Keep your budding artists busy in the changeable autumn weather with these crafty ideas

Put a sheet on the ground, open it up and let them go crazy. Mister Maker Bumper Craft Box, €29.99, ELC @ mothercare.ie

Keep calm A toddler will repeat swear words in order to get a reaction from you.

By losing your temper or shouting, you are feeding his appetite for attention. If this is the first time, simply ignoring what your child has said might help. If your child keeps using the word, you might need to address it. Keep calm but be firm – “I don’t like that word in this house”.

Be consistent Think about how you want to punish repeated swearing. For small children, taking away a nonfood treat like a story or a cartoon can help. Or if this is an ongoing issue, then a star chart for swearfree days with a reward at the end is a good idea. For older children, having to put 10c of their pocket money into a “swear jar” will stamp out swearing in days. Whatever you choose, be consistent and apply the punishment to every member of the family – including yourself.

Be strict with visitors Sometimes children are introduced to “colourful” language by their friends. Unfortunately you can’t

MI Aug_Sept 2015_News_Use This One.indd 18

control what happens when your child is at school or at a friend’s house, but you can stop swearing when it’s in your house or your car.

Simply tell your child and his friend that you don’t allow that word/ language in your house/car and that he’ll have to go home if he keeps swearing. Uf you find your child is swearing consistently after seeing certain friends, you may have to keep him home for a bit as a punishment.

Teach alternatives This is one for you as well.

Sometimes an expletive is needed, but you can learn (and teach) nicer alternatives. For instance, “sugar” instead of “sh*t”, or “flip” instead of “f**k”. If these are too similar (you may find the odd f-bomb coming out instead), make up something

completely different with your child, eg “holy beans” or “shut the front door”.

Turn your fingers into colourful creatures, flowers and characters with the nomess inkpads. Then add faces and features with rubber stamps. Finger Printing Art Set, €11.50, designist

Look for signs of trouble It’s only natural as your child grows and starts interacting with more children that they might pick up some naughty habits. Most children go through a phase of swearing or talking inappropriately, but if this is suddenly escalating, there may be something wrong. Sit down and ask your child if he is sad or angry about something. Talk to his pre-school teacher or minder about his behaviour in class. Could he be fighting with a friend? If the swearing is accompanied by aggression or inappropriate sexual behaviour, you may want to seek professional help.

A large project that might take days to complete (glorious peace!), this clever choice requires colouring and building. Chad Valley 2 in 1 Colour-In Castle, €7.99, Argos

27/07/2015 10:04

Another little helping hand for mums • 69% of pregnant women and new mums experience light bladder weakness* • Absorb faster than ordinary liners • Lock in moisture and control odour with FeelFresh Technology™

™ ! ts n e m o m s p o for those Ooo

*Source: lights by TENA Myriad Survey 2014

236205_1C_SCA_MI.indd 1 MI Aug_Sept 2015_Ad Template.indd 29

22/05/2015 17:17 16:54 27/07/2015

20 ESSENTIALS: TOYS Chad Valley PlaySmart Reading, Writing and Spelling, €14.49, Argos

Cash register, €34.99, ELC @ Mothercare Inflatable Globe, €3, Tiger

Leap Frog Leap-Band, €29.49, Argos Thomas & Friends Memory Game, €5.99, Smyths

Balance Boat, €18.50, designist

LEARNING FUN Hot Dots Let’s Learn Maths, €31, Littlewoods Ireland

Got a child starting the pre-school year? Quench their thirst for learning with these fab fun learning toys perfect for four year olds.

Chad Valley Interactive Magnetic Easel, €29.49, Argos

Thames & Cosmos Stepping into Science kit, €33.50, Debenhams

Plus Plus building blocks, €26.95, Mira Mira

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27/07/2015 10:05

21 ESSENTIALS: BOOKS

TELLING TALES Reviewed by Anne Whelton and Linda Crosbie For great children’s book reviews, competitions, recommendations and interviews with some of your favourite authors and illustrators,

PICK OF THE PILE

visit Gobblefunked.com

Grandad’s Island

By Benji Davies (Simon and Schuster), €9.99 Losing a grandparent can be extremely hard for little ones to understand. When a grandparent is no longer there, children have lots of questions. Grandad’s Island is written so beautifully and poignantly that it gives comfort in times of sorrow. It’s a hug in a book just when it’s needed. Written and illustrated by Benji Davies (The Storm Whale), this book offers support to both parents and children on a topic that can be hard to explain. We like … the comforting story in a time of grief. They’ll love … the detailed illustrations that give an insight in the life Grandad lived.

CLASSICS FOR ALL AGES

+ 4Wipe-Clean years Pirate

+ 3Double yearsTrouble

By Kirsteen Robson (Usborne Publishing), €7.90 Children need to learn to walk before they can run and hold a pen before they can write. Thanks to this latest Wipe-Clean book, your little one can practice pen control and learn to write with lots of pirate-themed activities and adventure games. With a special wipe-clean pen, kids can practice writing with join-the-dots, spot the differences and mazes. Come September, they’ll be ready to hit the ground running in junior infants. We like … practice makes perfect and the wipe-clean pen allows all the practice they need.

They’ll love … the great pirate adventures and learning a new skill in a playful way.

By Atinuke and Lauren Tobia (Walker Books), €17.99 The much-loved Hibiscus family are back - with two bundles in tow! Anna is now a big sister to twin baby boys but she’s not all that sure she likes it. No one seems to have any time for her anymore. Yes, jealousy has crept into the Hibiscus household.

Thankfully, It doesn’t take long for everyone to notice Anna once more and for her to feel proud of her big sister status.

If you’re expecting, this book introduces the concept of being a big brother or sister in a loving way. We like … the fun family dynamic of the Hibiscus clan.

They’ll love … learning that baby brothers and sisters aren’t all that bad.

Activities

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+ 3We’re years Going On A

Bear Hunt Colouring Book

By Michael Rosen (author), Helen Oxenbury (illustrator), (Walker Books), €7.90 Some 25 years on, We’re Going On A Bear Hunt is a staple and much-loved part of most bedtime routines and now children can create their own version of this beloved tale with this special colouring book. With colour by numbers and join the dots, kids can get creative with this new take on the classic book. We like … that kids will be encouraged to use their creativity (and they’ll be happily busy for a while during the school holidays!)

They’ll love … colouring in a story that they know and love!

+ 3Daddy’s yearsSandwich

By Pip Jones (author), Laura Hughes (illustrator), (Faber Children’s Books), €10.50 We ADORE this picture book! A little girl wants to do something nice for her daddy so she decides to make him a sandwich with all of his favourite things.

By the time lunch is ready, the only thing missing is the kitchen sink! Playful, silly and sure to get some giggles from pre-schoolers, this book is great for open storytelling – asking questions and pointing out details in the pictures.

We like …that the illustrations make it very easy to get creative with storytelling. They’ll love … the little girl’s fun approach to doing something nice for her daddy.

27/07/2015 10:05

22 THE BURNING ISSUE

OUR SURVEY We surveyed 100 maternity & infant readers to get their opinions on religion having preference in State-funded schools.

Q

Do you agree with publicly funded schools discriminating on religious grounds?

14 % 86 % YES

Q

NO

Q

Do you think State-funded schools should be secular rather than religious/denominational?

67

% YES

Is there an Educate Together primary school in your local catchment area?

52 % 41 % YES

NO

80%

have children who attended a school run by a religious body

52

%

disagreed with the statement ‘most State-funded schools discriminate against children who are not baptised’

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Catholic School.indd 22

58%

said you would not consider baptising your child in order to secure a place in your local school

80%

felt there should be an Educate Together available to their child in their local area

27/07/2015 10:58

23 THE BURNING ISSUE

SHOULD

RELIGION AND EDUCATION BE ENTWINED?

In an ongoing ad campaign, the Humanist Association of Ireland claims that “most national schools discriminate against children who are not baptised.”

Do Irish parents agree with this strong message?

RACHEL MURRAY investigates further.

E

nrolling your newborn in a primary school is probably the last thing on your mind as you make your way home from the maternity hospital, but the reality is, many primary schools are heavily over-subscribed, and the sooner you get your child’s name down, often the better chance you have of getting a place in your chosen school.

There are four types of schooling available in Ireland: religious-run, private, multi-denominational and Gaelscoileanna. Under the constitution every child also has the right to be home-schooled but not all of us are wealthy enough or brave enough! About 98 per cent of national schools are publicly funded; however, 96 per cent of these are controlled by religious bodies, 93 per cent of which are Roman Catholic.

Under the school admissions policy, schools can run on a “baptised first” basis, which often leaves the increasing number of people in Ireland who are not Catholic or identify as having no religion in a serious predicament if or when they have children.

Proposed new rules in schools admissions policy announced by Jan O’Sullivan, Minister for Education, does not tackle the issue of denominational schools being able to give preference to a child who has been baptised.

The draft legislation governing what schools may, or may not, include in their enrolment policies and practices is intended to introduce greater equity and transparency to the process, and covers a range of issues such as what applications a school may prioritise in cases where there is more demand than it has places. However, it does not interfere with the exemption that allows denominational schools give preference to children of their faith in order to “protect its religious ethos.”

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Catholic School.indd 23

Over the summer, the Humanist Association of Ireland ran a campaign calling for an end to what it says is discrimination in Statefunded schools against children who are not baptised. The advertising campaign ran in train stations, bus shelters and other prominent locations around the country.

Philip Byers from the Humanist Association of Ireland explains further: “The campaign started initially after we were contacted by a lot of parents who were very distressed because they couldn’t get their children into national school. These parents were finding themselves at a roadblock and in cases where there is a waiting list there was no opportunity for their child to get a place because the school has a “Catholic first” policy in place.

“Parents were extremely distressed about this, given that there were limited places generally in Ireland, and they were faced with the same answer: ‘well, why don’t you get put your child into an Educate Together school?’ But as there are only 74 Educate Together schools in Ireland not everyone has access to one in their area.

“We took this on because we felt that it is a very unequal behaviour. The State is paying for these schools yet it’s religious groups running them. Taxpayers’ money is funding the schools but not everyone can get equal access to education.”

The demand for multi-denominational schools both at primary and secondary level remains high, and multi-denominational schools group Educate Together says that the pressure for places in its schools in Dublin this year is “extraordinary”. CEO Paul Rowe says almost all of its 40 schools in the greater Dublin area have more than four times the amount of children applying compared to the number of places available.

27/07/2015 15:34

24 THE BURNING ISSUE

COMMENTS We surveyed 100 maternity & infant readers to get their opinions on religion having preference in Statefunded schools. Here are some of their comments: “We have only one local rural country school and each year 15-20 per cent of the class do not take communion or confirmation. No issue is made of this.”

Susan Mahon “We have put our son’s name down for a number of schools in our area, all of which are Catholic. We are hoping he gets into one of them but considering we won’t be producing a baptismal cert it could be difficult. Even at that, I’d prefer if he didn’t have to go to a school where the Catholic religion is forced on him.” Ruth Ryan “We baptised our children because it was a requirement to attend the local school.

At the time, that was the only school in the town, but an Educate Together and a Gaelscoil have both recently opened. If both schools had been open at the time I had my first child, they would not have been baptised.“ Toni O’Rourke “Although religious, thankfully our school doesn’t exclude kids because of religion.”

Lorraine Tomkins

Educate Together schools are State-funded schools and operate under exactly the same rules and regulations as all national schools. “I think the biggest difference for a parent is that there is no faith formation in the school day,” explains Deirdre O’Donoghue, Educate Together’s Governance Specialist. “We want children of all faiths, all creeds and all beliefs to have equal access to schools. Children are taught about all religious beliefs but they are not stated by teachers as fact or truth.”

Educate Together’s enrolment policy is equality based. It is done on a first come, first served basis. Once a child’s name is down for an Educate Together parents are given their number on the list. This means everyone can see where they are on the list and it is easier to judge whether a child has a chance of getting a place based on the number of places of available.

However, with only 74 Educate Together schools currently in Ireland, lots of parents find themselves in areas where there is only a denominational school but without a baptismal certificate, their child will may not be accepted – what can these parents do?

“It just doesn’t seem fair that people paying equal taxes do not have equal access to education for their children,” says Deirdre.

“I accept that there are Catholic schools but I think there either needs to be more Educate Together schools or the admissions policies in

Catholic schools needs to change. Our bottom line would be if you would like to send your child to an Educate Together school the choice should be there for you.”

There are five new Educate Together schools opening this year, four primary and one second level. Parents can also log on to Educate Together’s website (www.educatetogether.ie) and sign an expression of interest form for an Educate Together in their community. “We need to be able to show there is a demand for Educate Together schools because the Department of Education builds schools based on demand,” says Deirdre. “Once the school is built they invite the various patrons to fill in an application to become patrons of the new school. With the support of parents we can prove the demand is there.”

Some argue the need for change is overwhelming. Ireland’s attitude towards religion has changed dramatically in the last decade.

Devout religious families are quickly becoming a thing of the past so it would seem timely to question the place of religion in our schools.

However, the fact remains that the majority of Ireland’s population are Roman Catholic, practising or not, so at least on paper, it is a small minority who are affected by this issue.

However, in a State that commits itself to the concept of parental preference, is not unfair to give control of our children’s education to religious bodies?

OVER TO YOU Mum-of-one Mary Connaughton explains why she feels religion no longer has a place in the classroom.

“My kids go to a Catholic school and my daughter just made her first Holy Communion. There was three girls in her class who were not making their Communion, but the school, class and teacher still made the year special for them. What I don’t agree with is paying for religion classes in Educate Together schools outside of school time. That is not fair on parents; religion should be an option but included during school hours.”

Gemma O’Toole “I wasn’t living in the catchment area because we were in the process of looking for a place to rent, so if I didn’t have my child baptised she would have been in the last category to get in. I still wasn’t sure whether I wanted to get her baptised but that sort of made the final decision.” Yaz O’Connor

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Catholic School.indd 24

“Enrolling your child in primary school in Ireland is a bit of a minefield, with parents having to apply shortly after their child is born. Despite being State funded, 96 per cent of Irish primary schools are under the patronage of religious denominations, 93 per cent of which are under the patronage of the Catholic Church. This makes the enrolment process even more challenging for those of us who feel strongly that religion has no place in the classroom. The current situation is neither reflective of Irish society or the world we live in and I believe it does not serve our children well in developing a complex and nuanced understanding of the world. I believe that inculcating children with religious beliefs prevents their ability to become independent, critical thinkers. When enrolling my son for school, the options in my areas included an Educate Together or my local Catholic national school. I enrolled him for the Educate Together school but was informed that his name was so far down the list that he was unlikely to be offered a place. So, we had little option but to enrol our son in the local Catholic national school, which is very close to our home. The school informed us that to secure his place we needed to submit his baptismal certificate. Within a week of us responding that he had not been baptised we received a letter telling us he would not be offered a place at the school. When I queried this I was told that it was simply down to the fact that all of the places had been allocated to children who had siblings in the school – this I knew to be total fallacy as a number of neighbours who had children with no siblings at the school accepted that same week.

The only difference between them and my son is that he is not baptised. To people who believe that this is a non issue I’d like to ask them how they would feel if they were excluded from taking up employment in 96 per cent of organisations in Ireland because of their gender. We rail against societies where apartheid and social injustices exist, we legislate against racial and sexual discrimination yet we are prepared to tolerate overt discrimination on religious grounds in our publicly funded education system. Go figure.”

27/07/2015 10:59

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There is hardly anything as delicate as a baby’s skin. That is why the NUK Freestyle soother has less points of contact: a small surface area with large ventilation holes make it easy on the skin around the mouth. The NUK Teat, with its natural shape that is right for the jaw, also ensures that your child not only calms down, but can develop healthily all-round. So that you too can rest easy. More information at nuk.com

NUK. Understanding Life.

Available in pharmacies nationwide. www.nuk.com

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Ad Template.indd 29

27/07/2015 17:38

26 M&I AWARDS

People Awards

K

now someone who inspires? Motivates? Keeps you smiling? We want you to nominate them for a People Award and give them the recognition they deserve! Do you know a Miracle Baby of the Year who survived against all the odds, a Paediatrician who calmed your nerves when your child was sick, or a nurse who reassured you in those first few days as a parent? Then we want to hear from you! The Boots maternity & infant Awards has 15 People Award categories covering all of the people who make a happy, supported and most importantly, healthy family. Nominate today an inspirational person in your life who always goes above and beyond for everyone. font is helvetica Neue 95 Black, 54pt

Chantel Watts 2013 Midwife of the Year

We have 15 People Awards categories and nominating couldn’t be easier via www.maternityandinfant.ie n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n

Sudocrem Miracle Baby of the Year BT Child Hero of the Year eumom Business Parent of the Year NUK Mum of the Year Dad of the Year Irish Daily Mail Grandparent of the Year Super Sibling of the Year Nurse of the Year Paediatrician of the Year Obstetrician of the Year Mothercare Midwife of the Year Public Health Nurse of the Year Pharmacist of the Year Young Achiever of the Year Outstanding Achievement Award

www.maternityandinfant.ie

100% Magenta

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Awards.indd 26

Shane, Lexie and Niamh Lynch 2014 Miracle Baby of the Year

100% Cyan 95% Magenta

27/07/2015 15:43

27 M&I AWARDS

Finalists Announced font is helvetica Neue 95 Black, 54pt

The parents of Ireland have been voting for their favourite products and the finalists in the Boots maternity & infant Awards have been announced! Over the coming weeks, these products will be put through their paces by parents at home and at our Academy Testing day. But it doesn’t end there. We still want parents to vote for their favourite finalists.

Voting for the 2015 Boots maternity & infant Awards opens on July 28th.

Bernie Long 2014 Public Health Nurse of the Year

AJ Doyle 2014 Dad of the Year

The Boots maternity & infant Awards aim to provide you, the parent, with all of the information you need to choose the right products for your little one from birth. Parents tell other parents what products are great and what just aren’t up to scratch. There is nothing like a personal recommendation from another parent and that’s what we are offering.

#bootsmiawards2015 #bootspeopleawards

APPROVE DB D & Y

• VOTED ,

TE

n • W in

er •

NTS • RE PA

S TE

RTÉ Today Show Quaid Cleland 2014 Young Achiever of the Year

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Awards.indd 27

Donna Magee 2012 Business Parent of the Year

We are delighted to announce that we have hooked up with the Today show on RTÉ to showcase the Boots maternity&infant Awards. Watch out for us on the couch with Maura and Daithí in September. We will be showcasing previous People Award winners, our Academy testing day, the Awards ceremony and 2015 Product and People Award winners.

27/07/2015 15:44

28 MUMMY MY WAY

“HAVING KIDS

SHOULD NOT MEAN

YOU CEASE TO BECOME THE PERSON YOU WERE, IT SHOULDN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP

THE HOPES, DREAMS AND ASPIRATIONS YOU ONCE HAD.”

Laura Breslin is mum to two boys, aged three and three months, and blogs at themammafairy.blogspot.ie. Here she discusses why she’s determined to keep her career ambitions alive while juggling motherhood.

I

am a wife, mother, accountant, writer, sister, daughter and granddaughter. I am all of these things but not defined by any one of them. People are often shocked when I say I enjoy my job and they are even more shocked when I say I work by choice and not out of necessity.

I am the daughter of parents who both worked and worked damn hard when I was growing up. Did it make me any less of a person? Certainly not. Did I think my parents loved me any less than those with parents who one or both stayed at home? Certainly not. What having working parents did for us three kids was instil an incredibly hard work ethic in us, they made us believe we can achieve anything we set our minds and hearts to.

My mother is my inspiration. She was ahead of her time. She was a career woman at the time when woman were forced to give up work when they got married. She was in the first group not to have to do this and she took full advantage of it. Not only did she forge her own career, she was the rock behind my father’s professional career and the rock behind the careers of her three kids, who all now hold professional positions.

I have been an accountant for over ten years, having first studied Business and Economics at Trinity College Dublin. In those 10 years I also became a wife to an amazing man and a mother to two beautiful boys who are my life.

When I first set out on my journey of being an accountant, I set myself a number of goals, some of which I achieved and sometimes exceeded, while others have taken a back seat until my children are a little older. But they are still there and I firmly believe I can still achieve them, albeit in a longer timeframe. Having kids should not mean you cease to become the person you were, it shouldn’t mean you have to give up the hopes, dreams and aspirations you once had.

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Yes, they will most likely take longer to achieve as you focus on your kids in the early years, and they may even need a little tailoring, but you are still you and if it means so much, you will find a way to get there.

I remember chatting to the secretary in my job on the night of her retirement. At the time I was just pregnant with my second child.

She said to me that kids grow up so quickly and develop their own life filled with hopes and dreams, so I shouldn’t give up my dreams. Even if I had to add 10 or even 20 years to the timeframe that’s ok, but don’t give up on what was important to me, be that personal or professional. Those words have stuck in my head.

Being a working mother is hard, there is no doubt about it. You have to be super organised all the time, you need to make every second you spend with your children count. The housework is always left until the kids go to bed in the evening. There is also the guilt. It does cross my mind at times: am I doing my children a great disservice by working, should I be at home with them full time?

I know I am extremely fortunate. My mother minds my children; she is a firm believer that I shouldn’t give up my dreams and aspirations, which is why she goes above and beyond to support me and my siblings. I wish I could put into words how much she does for me, not only in terms of minding my boys but also in terms of encouragement to follow my hopes and dreams. Perhaps one day I’ll be a fraction of the woman she is. But I know one thing: I’ll keep my career aspirations and goals alive. If it takes me 10 years or 20 years it actually doesn’t matter I know I’ll get there. In the meantime I will enjoy every second I spend with my boys.

I’m not saying any of this is the right way, but rightly or wrongly, it’s my way.

27/07/2015 10:59

29 TREND

MATERNITY

Style

Mamalicious

This issue we take on dressing for the office while pregnant. Whether you’ve got important meetings, a strict dress code or still find yourself on the go with bump in tow, we’ve got the outfit for you. We’ve also tackled the hottest colour this season, orange, which is perfect for giving your maternity style a colour pop.

Our Steal Her Style star is first-time mum Katherine Jenkins. Katherine’s style has always been glamorous and that certainly hasn’t changed now that she is pregnant. Happy bump shopping!

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27/07/2015 15:28

KIDS ARE ALWAYS GROWING... but with Adjust-AHem trousers (hems that you can unpick, alter and press), and the magic of Adjustable Waist they won’t need a new uniform every time they have a growth spurt.

30 ADVERTISING FEATURE

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L W O E H AR C S R EV From shirts that repel dirt to trousers that get longer, M&S is top of the class for stylish, comfortable and durable schoolwear.

MARKS & SPENCER IS

TOP of THE CLASS

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his year’s M&S Back to School Collection boasts three new innovations to make uniforms even easier to wear and easier to care for. Because kids get

wet, trousers, skirts, shorts, blazers and coats feature Triple Action Stormwear, which is water repellent, stain repellent and makes washing a breeze. Say goodbye to rough and scratchy jumpers and sweatshirts thanks to Staysoft, a durable softener that keeps clothes soft no matter how many times they’re washed. Keep kids in their clothes for longer with Adjust-A-Cuff. M&S has added an extra 3cm to blazer sleeves and you can adjust the length without a needle and thread.

27/07/2015 11:03

31 ADVERTISING FEATURE

WELL DONE

ALL KIDS ARE DIFFERENT ... ... so M&S doesn’t take the ‘one size fits all approach’. Ensure your child’s school uniform fits just right with our Plus Fit (a generous extra 6cm through the chest, waist and hips) and Slim Fit ranges (cut 4cm smaller through the chest, waist and hips). You can also choose from Longer Length (skirts and trousers that are 4cm longer) and Shorter Length (skirts and trousers that are 4cm shorter) options to match their proportions perfectly.

1 M&S Girls’ Traditional Pinafore, from €13.50 2 M&S Girls’ Coated Leather Shoes, from €33 3 M&S Ultimate Non-Iron Short-Sleeve Shirt, from €11 (2 pack) 4 M&S Ultimate Non-Iron Short-Sleeve Shirt, from €12 (2 pack)

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AS WELL AS BEING PRACTICAL, uniforms need to be comfortable. Skinkind clothing has flat seams, soft trims and no latex, making it perfect for sensitive skin while selected shoes have Insolia andAirflex for added comfort.

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5 M&S Merino Wool Jumpers, from €17.50 6 M&S Flat-Front Trousers, from €15

Top-quality fabrics keep their uniform looking good whatever they put it through. Features include Sealed Hems on all boys’ and selected girls’ trousers to ensure the hems will stay up for longer, Engineered Seams on ultimate non-iron shirts to give a smoother appearance and Heat Sealed Buttons on blazers to save time spent on sewing.

EASY PEASY Choose Ultimate Non-Iron shirts for crisp, crinkle free shirts, fresh from the tumble drier.

To make life easier, trousers have Supercrease technology which offers a permanent central crease even after washing while Permanent Pleats on skirts and pinafores ensure the pleats stay crisp and defined wash after wash.

Leave the iron in the cupboard thanks to Crease Resistant Technology.

5

M&S DoubleBreasted Pinafore, from €13.50

From the first day of term to the end-of-year photo, Staynew ensures their uniforms remain bright and bobble free, while Colour Stay prevents clothes from fading in the wash. Scuff Resistant technology makes sure their shoes stand up to playground rough and tumble so they look good for longer.

M&S Unisex Sweatshirt, from €8

M&S Quilted Coat, from €33

The M&S Back to School Collection is available in stores nationwide and is also available on www.marksandspencer.ie

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27/07/2015 11:03

32 TREND

Trimester Trends

If only the dress code in work didn’t apply to pregnant women! Unfortunately, while it’s tempting to throw on a comfy trackie at times, you might have to make a bit of an effort in a professional office setting. Make your life a little easier on workday mornings with these stylish buys.

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1 Combined shopper bag, €35.95, Zara 2 Maternity tights, €9.99, H&M 3 Sophia dress, €129, Seraphine 4 L’Oréal Blake’s lipstick in pure red, €11.99, stockists nationwide 5 No7 dramatic lift mascara, €17.50, Boots 6 Slingbacks, €24.95, H&M

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1 Metallic multi-row collar chain, €18, Topshop 2 Maternity oversized chambray shirt, €42.40, Topshop 3 Luxury A-line Riley maternity skirt, €40.99, Seraphine 4 Lexi maternity top, €95, Isabella Oliver 5 Rimmel London BB Cream, €8.99, Boots 6 Darah bag, €95, Dune 7 Black block heel pointed shoes, €40, River Island

1 Maternity drape front blouse, €45, Topshop 2 Fleur jacket, €83, Monsoon 3 Maternity bright blue jeggings, €12, New Look 4 Benefit Fake Up concealer, €37.45, Debenhams 5 Foldable umbrella, €12.95, Zara 6 DyrbergKern Inas rose gold earrings, €55, Kilkenny Shop 7 Shoes with metal heel and toe cap, €25.95, Zara

27/07/2015 09:46

33 TREND

Orange

IS THE NEW BLACK Summer’s almost gone and it’s time to start thinking about your autumn wardrobe. The darker evenings are no excuse for looking drab - swap black for orange and you’ll be right on trend this season.

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Elsa maternity poncho, €136, Isabella Oliver

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1 Gold tone filigree pendant necklace, €6, River Island 2 Neville maternity shift dress, €179, Isabella Oliver 3 Orange asymmetric peplum jacket, €80, River Island 4 Leopard print belt, €6.99, H&M 5 Maternity neon orange vest, €7.99, New Look 6 Gold earrings, €4.99, H&M 7 Suede fringe shoulder bag, €86, Topshop 8 Leather boots, €69.99, H&M 9 Orange ankle strap block heels, €11.50, New Look 10 Rose gold tone bracelet watch, €37, River Island 11 Per una speziale leopard coat, €224, Marks & Spencer 12 Star maternity top, €63, ASOS 13 Le Specs, €61, Sunglasses Shop

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27/07/2015 16:46

34 Gold tone twist pendant necklace, €10, River Island

TREND Silver tone sparkly gem stud earrings, €6, River Island

STEAL HER

STYLE

Black metal trim asymmetric clutch bag, €20, River Island

The always stunning Katherine Jenkins announced she was expecting her first child in May with this tweet: ‘Couldn’t be more excited to meet our little girl! #MummyToBe #DaddyToBe #ArtProject #Collaboration #Family @andrewlevitas.’

Katherine’s effortless sense of style has remained the same throughout her 10-year career, and now that she’s pregnant, nothing has changed. Pictured here looking radiant and protective of her burgeoning bump, Katherine is clearly in business mode but keeps her look understated.

It has been reported that Katherine planned to leave the music industry when she gives birth to her daughter this autumn, but she was quick to clear this up: “I never said I was giving up on music. I said in an interview that if am lucky enough to have children, then I’d like to take some time off to enjoy that. With all the travelling and the touring, I don’t think I’d be a very good mum.”

Crepe jacket, €29.99, H&M

Asymmetric top, €39.95, Zara

GETTY IMAGES

Clarisa heels, €105, Dune

Ray Ban sunglasses, €169, Vision Express Zadie stretch maternity skinny jeans, €115, Isabella Oliver

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27/07/2015 09:45

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27/07/2015 27/07/2015 17:40 10:54

36 TREND

1 2 1

Pre-School

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PIECES

3

Little one starting pre-school this September? In the absence of a uniform, invest in comfy and durable clothes that are great for both playtime and learning.

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Main image: Zip-through hooded fleece (18mths-8yrs), €14.95; graphic tee (18mths-8yrs), €6.95; denim-look jogger (18mths-8yrs), €15.95, all Mothercare 1 Mantaray boy’s red striped space dye t-shirts (3pk) (12mths-6yrs), from €12.60, Debenhams 2 Robot t-shirt (12mths-14yrs), €7.15, Marks & Spencer 3 Petit Bateau skating denim dungarees (12-36mths), €55, Brown Thomas 4 Mid-cut high tops (3-8yrs), €25.95, Zara 5 Billy Bandit blue t-shirt (2-14yrs), €24.50, Arnotts 6 Navy jogger (2-7yrs), €7, Penneys 7 Cool kids sweatshirt (18mths-10yrs), €14.99, H&M 8 Little monster printed hat (6mths-4yrs), €7.95, Zara 9 Nitlox M knit dress (1-4yrs), €24.95, name it 10 Chop-out hi tops (3mths-6yrs), from €23, Next 11 name it girls knitted jumper with ribbon detail (9mths-4yrs), €13, House of Fraser 12 Printed snood, €3, Penneys 13 Billie Blush navy jeans (2-14yrs), €31, Arnotts 14 Top with sequined embroidery (18mths-10yrs), €6.99, H&M 15 Stripe jumper dress (3mths-6yrs), from €21, Next

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27/07/2015 09:37

37 TREND

SCHOOL BAG Essentials

Get started with your school prep early with these cute school bag essentials for your little ones.

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1 Girls’ junior pencil case backpack, €14.99, Easons 2 Monster Mash Up mini backpack, €22, Paperchase 3 Marvel Avengers stationery pack, €15, Littlewoods 4 Frozen barrel pencil case, €2.50, Penneys 5 Just In Case bear lunch bag, €20, Paperchase 6 Kids’ drinking bottle, €2.99, Lidl 7 Pirate colouring pencils, €7, designist 8 Marvel Avengers Assemble pencil case set, €12.99, Smyths 9 Coloured pens, €2, Tiger 10 Ultimate Spider-Man 3D EVA face lunch bag, €12.99, Easons 11 Bow hairband, 2.99, Zara 12 Mickey pencil case, €3.50, Penneys

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27/07/2015 09:40

38 TREND

SEASON

changes

2

Prepare for shorter evenings and chillier days with these cute, comfortable and warm pieces for your baby.

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Boys: 1 Low-rise jeans (3mths-3yrs), €19.95, Zara 2 bluezoo Babies red monkey applique top (0-24 mths), from €5.25, Debenhams 3 Gilet (0-4yrs), €26, Mamas & Papas 4 Emilie et Rose Fletcher three-piece knitted set (3-12mths), €65, Brown Thomas 5 Polarn O. Pyret baby quilted denim all-in-one (1-9mths), €21, House of Fraser 6 Frugi navy babygrow (024mths), €15, Arnotts 7 Denim shirt with roll-up sleeves (3mths-3yrs), €13.95, Mothercare Girls: 1 Knitted stripe cat dress & tights (3mths-3yrs), €21.95, Mothercare 2 Shiny tulle skirt (9mths-3yrs), €7.95, Zara 3 Ditsy print denim dress (3mths-6yrs), from €21, Next 4 J by Jasper Conran Designer pink horse sleepsuit (0-24mths), from €14.70, Debenhams 5 Textured coat (0-4yrs), €36, Mamas & Papas 6 Sprint jogleg (9-36mths), €5, Penneys 7 Stars and stripes t-shirt (3mths-3yrs), €9.95, Zara 8 Bunny pocket hi tops (3mths-6yrs), from €19, Next

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n • Win

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er•

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with his children has its rewards too.

40 STARTING SCHOOL SPECIAL

CHANGING

TIMES

The evenings are getting a tiny bit shorter and the leaves are beginning to fall… Which means it’s nearly back to school time. Gulp. If you’re a parent of a child starting “big” school, September might be even more emotional for you.

Psychologist ALISON BOUGH looks at how to weather the change – both you and your child!

A

s September draws ever closer thousands of children prepare to start primary school and a number of potential concerns await both them and their nervous parents.

Nowadays, particularly since the introduction of the government’s Early Childhood Care & Education Scheme, the large majority of children attend preschool so they will have already experienced a range of transitions before starting primary school.

However, it should not be assumed that where this has happened a child will necessarily find a move to ‘big school’ any easier.

In each setting children encounter different people with different values; meaning that young children come to school not only with different experiences, but with different expectations too. The start of school is a significant life change for parents as well

as their children – the very thought of their baby beginning the long school career can be emotional for many parents.

Choosing a school For many Irish parents, choosing a school has become an increasingly complex issue.

Because of the much wider choices now available in many towns and cities, parents today may choose to send their child to a school for a variety of different reasons such as its academic record or other criteria such as the school’s ability to allow each child his or her uniqueness, previously established friendships, religion, because there is no choice geographically and that it is their nearest school, or simply because of a school’s good reputation. Either way, it is beneficial for parents to start thinking about these issues earlier rather than lat-

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er, as this helps to avoid the problem that many parents find themselves in, whereby they have to make quick decisions because they had not thought through the issues early enough. As such, parents should try to structure their thoughts about what their own priorities are before visiting schools, but also to use ‘gut feeling’ when choosing a school for their child or children.

Preparation It is really important that children are socialised in a variety of different ways before starting primary school. Playdates, playgroups, and preschools all help young children in developing friendships, which is important in helping children to learn to accept others, adjust their own perspective, follow others’ initiatives and create their own. Developing knowledge about people

27/07/2015 10:19

41 STARTING SCHOOL SPECIAL tal picture of what might happen during the day. Parents should talk about ‘big’ school frequently as the time approaches and, ideally, children should get the opportunity to meet their teacher and see what big school is all about before they start. A lot of the Junior Infants environment is based around learning the routines associated with school such as going to the toilet, washing hands and lining up. Although many parents feel that these procedures will already be familiar from the pre-school setting, repetition at home is still helpful for young children.

The first day For most four and five year olds that first day of school is an equal mix of anxiety and tension between wanting to enter the new stage and staying in the safety of the known. Parents are expected to help children to find their coat pegs, put PE bags and lunch boxes in the appropriate places, get their little people settled in their seats, say goodbyes and then leave.

Whilst this is an undoubtedly difficult moment, parents can be safe in the knowledge that teachers will endeavour to give the children a gentle start to their first day. New routines and experiences such as assembly, ‘little break ‘and ‘big break’ will be introduced and explained by the teacher beforehand in order to make children feel secure. Teachers have a number of systems in place for helping children to get to know one another and develop friendships.

These often include a combination of giving

overriding concern being their child’s happiness.

Although the large majority of children transition into primary school without any difficulties it is important that parents and teachers are able to recognise and identify the signs of anxiety in children, which can manifest in a number of ways: ✹ difficulty talking or eating; ✹ not co-operating or interacting with others, resulting in lack of friendships; ✹ difficulty understanding, attending and concentrating; ✹ blank or worried expression most of the time; ✹ repetitive, rhythmic or self-destructive habits; ✹ never volunteers or contributes in class; ✹ little work done, sits or stands for long periods doing nothing; ✹ consistent problems separating from parents on arrival; ✹ tummy upsets or sleep disturbance.

The start of school has the potential for establishing sound parental expectations for the partnership between home and school.

Very often, parents are used to a close partnership within their children’s pre-school settings but cannot expect the same level of casual contact when their children start primary school. Schools will, more than likely, see partnership as giving access to the teacher before and after school to talk

“Parents should talk about ‘big’ school frequently as the time approaches and, ideally, children should get the opportunity to meet their teacher and see what big school is all about before they start.” and learning social flexibility will help them to cope. Children also need to visit places, see different environments and meet different people to give them a wide variety of experiences; making change and transitions a normal part of life.

Buying the uniform and other equipment such as the schoolbag and lunchbox, is another important element of preparation – a rite of passage – leading to the start of school and should be highlighted as a fun and exciting activity for the child. Rehearsing getting ready for school by trying on their uniform, getting up early or walking to the school are other positive strategies to familiarise children with what will be expected of them.

Parents play a crucial role in preparing their child for school, not just with outward signs such as buying lunch boxes and pencil cases but in giving their child a men-

children an older ‘buddy’ to look after them, introducing the children either during ‘circle time’ or in assembly, giving them badges or grouping them to work together. In many schools an open door policy at the beginning and end of school is seen as a means for sharing problems, whilst diaries and parents’ evenings are viewed as a means of communication about progress.

Troubleshooting During their transition into primary school young children will be faced with a wide range of potentially stressful demands such as learning school rules, coping with teacher expectations and developing relationships with new adults and other children. Parents, meanwhile, commonly voice concerns about lunchtimes, discipline, bullying and about their child’s ability to cope with work and school; their

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through problems, having a reading record diary, holding parents’ evenings, having a Parent Teacher/Friends of the School Association and parents helping in the classroom when requested. If there are any concerns present about a child not settling or coping well with the school transition parents and teachers should seek opportunities to communicate fully about the issues at hand and develop a partnership in the early stages of school in order to understand each other’s worlds.

MORE INFORMATION

Alison Bough www.alisonbough. ie is a psychologist, clinical director of themindfulnesscentre.ie in Naas, Co Kildare, and mum to three small people. You can find her in the Twittersphere @AlisonBough

27/07/2015 10:19

42 STARTING SCHOOL SPECIAL

HEALTHY LUNCHBOXES Most schools now operate a healthy eating policy – make sure you read their guidelines carefully. Here are some extra tips from safeFood to help keep lunchboxes interesting, tasty and fun. ✹ Include a wide variety of foods – starchy foods, protein, dairy, and fruit and vegetables ✹ Try to offer different foods every day – no one wants to be eating a ham sandwich five days a week! ✹ Vary the types of bread eg pitta bread, bagels, wholemeal rolls – keep a stock in the freezer ✹ Cook extra rice/pasta in the evening – these can make interesting salads ✹ Theme your lunchbox on a different country, eg Italian – try a pasta salad, Mexican – filled flour tortillas ✹ Home-made soup (in a Thermos flask) is great for cold days, while salads are light and refreshing for warmer weather. Both are packed with essential vitamins and minerals.

Check your school’s policy on flasks, however. ✹ Fluids are important for children – up to six cups of fluid should be encouraged daily.

Milk and water are the best options. Straws and brightly coloured drinks bottles can make rehydrating more interesting!

LOOKING

SHARP For most kids, starting school means investing in a school uniform.

What exactly do you need, and how can you save money?

Want to take your nosh up a notch? Turn to p65 for Annabel Karmel’s interesting lunchbox recipes

SMART PICKS

Navy pinafore 2pk, €7.99, Aldi

Boys’ blue short-sleeved shirts 2pk, €18, Debenhams

Main: Blouses from €10; cardigans from €8.50; pinafores from €10; shorts from €11.50; and skirts from €8.50, all Next

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Slim leg trousers, from 17.50, M&S

Skater skirt, from €12, M&S

F&F 3pk supersoft tights in red, from €6.50, Tesco

Girls coated leather heart shoes, from €27, M&S

27/07/2015 10:17

43 STARTING SCHOOL SPECIAL

T

here is a common theme in the media at this time of the year – back-to-school costs, particularly school uniforms. The majority of schools in Ireland have some sort of school uniform, whether it’s a crested sweatshirt or the full shebang, and according to Department of Education survey of parents in 2014, the indication is that most parents like having a school uniform. However, there is some debate about the cost of uniforms, particularly in schools that force parents to buy from certain suppliers and offer no flexibility when it comes to crested items (eg no opportunity to purchase generic items and an iron-on crest). Whether or not the survey will result in change is unknown, but there are signs that schools are aware of the burden of back-to-school costs on parents and some seem keen to come up with solutions. In the meantime, here are some tips on budgeting when it comes to uniforms: ✹ If you can, talk to parents of older children in the school to get tips and tricks.

There may be a cheaper supplier of a particular skirt, or a chainstore that has a perfect dupe of a school sweatshirt. If your child’s uniform list is particularly long, more experienced parents might be able to tell you if certain things are not really needed, eg a school rain jacket. The Parents’ Association (if there is one) is generally a good source of information if you don’t know any other parents yourself. ✹ Some schools operate a second-hand uniform service. Although these are generally at the end of the school year, some

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✹

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✹

schools may have a supply of secondhand uniform items left over. Alternatively the parents’ association may be able to put you in contact with parents of children going into a higher class who might have left-over items going spare.

Be organised, but don’t buy too much!

Remember that children can grow rapidly at this age, and what fitted them in August mightn’t fit them in December!

Buy the minimum you’re comfortable with, and enquire that you can get more items during the year if you need them.

Also, don’t buy too early – it’s tempting to get them when you see them, and while we wouldn’t recommend leaving it to the last minute in case shop supplies run low, be mindful that kids can grow in the space of weeks. (what is it about summer?!)

Go generic when you can. The likes of Dunnes, Aldi, M&S, Tesco and more offer really great-quality uniform items at a good price, and most carry items in their stores throughout the year. If not, you may be able to order online or order into the store so always enquire if this is possible when you are buying at first.

Involve your children in buying the school items. You might have bad memories of school uniforms as a teenager, but to a four/five year old, the thought of school, uniforms and even homework is almost unbearably exciting. Let them help by choosing a bag, pencil case and lunchbox.

Let them try it on – and try not to cry!

They’re at the start of a new adventure, enjoy the excitement with them.

Boys’ grey trousers, €1.99, Aldi

Grey tank top, from €7, Next

White lace blouse, from €7, Next

Checkboard lunchbag, €19, M&S

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F&F unisex sweatshirt in blue, from €3.75, Tesco

WIN AGIFT€100CARD!M&S

Send your kids back to school in style with the M&S range of schoolwear. Kids grow, play and get dirty so school uniforms need to be able to withstand the rigours of the school year. From stain resistant trousers to non-iron shirts, M&S is top of the class for stylish, comfortable and durable school uniforms, which boast smart innovations to withstand all the work and play of the classroom along with the rough and tumble of the playground.

To be in with a chance to win a €100 M&S gift card simply answer the following question:

WHAT DOES M&S STAND FOR? a) Marks and Spencer b) Make and Spend c) Mister and Sister Send your answer with your contact details to competitions@maternityandinfant.ie and M&S in the subject line. Competition closes 20th September. Usual terms and conditions apply (see p77 for full terms and conditions)

Red v-neck jumper, from €10, Next

Pleated skirt in navy, from €4.50, Tesco

Boys’ scuff-resistant shoes, €6.99, Aldi

27/07/2015 10:18

44 PREGNANCY

Pregnancy WHAT’S YOUR

PERSONALITY? Pregnancy is an amazing journey for most women, but some of us can experience exaggerated personality traits that are unrecognisable to our pre-pregnancy selves. SIMONE KENNY GLENNON looks at some common pregnancy alter egos and offer some tips on how to rein in the maternity madness.

W

omen go through some major transformations during pregnancy – not just physically but mentally too. A new human is being formed so it’s unsurprising really that we experience such huge changes. Yet it’s still fascinating, scary and disconcerting to witness your very own transition from the ‘you’ you once knew to a new ‘pregnancy you’. Some elements of pregnancy you’ll welcome – like maybe the physical transformation of bigger boobs, or a new ‘kick-ass’ personality trait. However, other aspects can leave you virtually unrecognisable – to yourself and those around you.

Hormones have a huge impact during pregnancy, not just in preparing our body and mind for this imminent little miracle’s growth and arrival, but also on our personality and outlook too. Yet there seems to be scant scientific evidence as to why women experience new, and sometimes extreme, traits during the nine months of pregnancy.

Nonetheless, anecdotal evidence does exist, and suggests many mums-to-be develop characteristics that weren’t apparent before they conceived, and often disappear following the birth. One of the most commonly recognised pregnancy traits is ‘baby brain’ and, despite previous scientific studies failing to prove cognitive decline during pregnancy (which may be due to tests being conducted in a laboratory instead of real-world settings), a new Australian study is researching cognitive changes, specifically impulse control and self-regulation, to determine if self-regulation is weakened during pregnancy.

Led by Deakin University psychology lecturer Dr Melissa Hayden, the study involves 80 women undergoing two-hour cognitive neuroscience tests where their responses to food and non-food stimuli will be assessed by monitoring eye movements and the brain’s electrical activity. So we await the results of yet another pregnancy brain study with bated breath!

In the meantime, we highlight some common pregnancy personality types you might recognise.

The good news? You should revert back to your normal self after baby arrives.

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45 PREGNANCY

Forgetful Fionnuala

Moany Maria

No Patience Paula

As mentioned, this is one pregnancy personality alter ego that almost every pregnant woman will develop. ‘Baby brain’ can cause you to not only forget the most unlikely of things (like your own name) but also carry out the silliest of tasks (putting your phone in the fridge – it’s been done, trust me). To be fair, your brain is being overloaded with so many different thoughts and worries about your baby and your changing physical appearance that it’s no wonder we become forgetful and, dare I say it, a bit doolally.

Okay, so there are a few justifiable pregnancy moans, like nausea, insomnia and heartburn. The problem is when this moany disposition spreads to other aspects of your pregnancy and life, making you sound like Little Miss Miserable in the process. If you notice you’ve taken a whiney turn for the worst try to remind yourself of all the positive aspects of your pregnancy, and life generally. It’s possible to change your mindset once you recognise it.

Ah, my personal nemesis. I found patience to be in very short supply during my second pregnancy, for just about everything: queues, public transport, rambling conversations...

This is where focusing on your breathing can be useful (though I never had the patience for this myself). Otherwise, try to avoid situations or people who you’re likely to lose patience with, especially if you’re feeling in any way tired. No patience + exhaustion = bad outcome.

Tactless Tina

Short-Fuse Sally

Control-Freak Ciara

Everyone puts their foot in their mouth occasionally but during the nine months of pregnancy, this can become more commonplace. I’m not sure how or why, but saying the wrong thing, at the wrong time, in the wrong place was a frequent and uncomfortable occurrence for me. Luckily my friends and family are much more tolerant than me and, so far, haven’t disowned me. It’s not easy to engage your brain before your mouth in pregnancy but the more you do the more friends you’ll have after the birth.

Hormones have a lot to answer for here. Even the most laidback ladies can lose the plot in seconds over the most innocuous of crimes: your partner eating the last slice of bread, your colleague breathing, rain. Sudden rage can be scary for all those involved, including you. It’s like having frequent but spontaneous bouts of PMS without any warning or menstrual cycle. Try to laugh at yourself and use humour to diffuse any tense situations.

Hopefully the unfortunate recipients will be understanding and see the funny side of any short-fuse outbursts.

Perhaps because our body (and to some extent, our mind) is seemingly being taken over by a little person, this can compel us to exert more control in other aspects of our life. I’ll admit to some controlling tendencies pre-pregnancy but it did reach ridiculous levels mid-pregnancy. I just couldn’t understand why people didn’t do things my way, which was clearly the only way to do it right. I’ve had ‘Let It Go’ sang/shouted at me more than once over the past few months.

My advice? Choose your battles. If you feel really strongly about something important then stand your ground. If not, don’t sweat the small stuff.

Organised-Obsessed Orla

Low Tolerance Lily

If organisation is already your forté then you may be in a spot of trouble here, as your need to have everything in order pre-baby will shift into overdrive. Yes, there is a lot to be organised during pregnancy in lieu of your new bundle’s arrival, but be mindful of overorganising. I wanted the whole house cleared out and re-organised room-by-room before baby arrived, and tried my damnedest to achieve it. In hindsight I realise I was working through all the nervous energy of the unknown, because no matter how much you try to prepare for your new baby, you will never be fully prepared, and you just have to accept it. Easier said than done though.

This can take the most tolerant amongst us by surprise, not to mention our shell-shocked loved ones. Where once you were happy to let certain things slide (lateness, messiness, stupidness) you now just cannot tolerate them. Maybe letting rip is occasionally justifiable but if it frequently manifests into sharp or offensive words then you really must try to choose your words carefully, or even hold your tongue altogether. Honestly, what seems like a huge pet peeve right now probably won’t bother you a jot once baby arrives.

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Clumsy Caitriona A lot of drinks will be spilled and crockery broken. You may also find yourself covered in bruises from bumping into things as a result of poorer than usual spatial awareness. Unfortunately in my case, the clumsy collateral damage extended to my toddler son who received frequent trampled toes/eye pokes. It’s probably best to put away the fine china and crystal and steer clear of defenseless young children where possible for the next nine months.

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46 PRACTICALS

Product Guide to:

CAR SEATS

A car seat is one of the most important purchases for your new baby – here we look at what you need to know in terms of safety and ease of use, and reveal our top picks on the market today.

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47 PRACTICALS

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here are many baby items you can put on the long finger and see how you fare out before you fork out, but if you drive a car, a car seat should be one of your very first purchases. Quite simply, you need a car seat to bring the baby home from hospital, so this is one thing you need well in advance of your due date.

There are, of course, safety issues with car seats.

According to the AA Motoring Trust, a child properly restrained in a child car seat can reduce injuries by 90-95 per cent for rear-facing seats and 60 per cent for forward-facing seats. To make sure your child is properly protected, there are a number of things to look out for. Firstly, child car seats must be in accordance with EU or United Nations-EconomicCommissionforEurope(UNECE) standards. They must also be weight- and age-approriate. Finally, and most importantly, they must be fitted properly. ISOFIX settings in modern cars has made this task easier, but when you are buying your seat, no matter where you get it or what you choose, make sure you are given a full demonstration on how to secure it in your car, remove it and replace it. You should also practice before your baby is born. According to Mothercare, it’s estimated that up to 80 per cent of child seats are incorrectly fitted, so we cannot emphasise enough how important it is that you know how to fit and move your seat.

Here we look at some of the frequently asked questions regarding child seats and find out the latest safety information.

Do I really need a car seat?

Yes. According to the Road Safety Authority (RSA), new EU child safety protection laws are now in force, making it compulsory for all children to travel in the correct child seat, booster seat or booster cushion. Children under three years of age must not travel in a car or goods vehicle (other than a taxi) unless restrained in the correct child seat. Children aged three years or over who are under 150cms in height and weighing less than 36 kilograms (generally children up to the age of 11 or 12) must use the correct child seat, booster seat or booster cushion when travelling in cars or goods vehicles. Safety belts must be worn if they are fitted.

What do I need for a baby?

Babies up to 13kg must be restrained in a rearward-facing baby seat, as these seats provide great protection for the baby’s head, neck and

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spine. Some come with newborn inserts to provide even greater protection for your very new baby. Your baby can stay in this seat until 12-15 months, or until they exceed 13kg in weight (or their head is higher than the top of the seat). Keep your baby in this seat for as long as possible. The new EU i-Size (R129) standard recommends that babies should stay rear-facing until at least 15 months.

Is rear-facing really that much safer?

In a word, yes. Studies have shown that ensuring that a child is properly restrained in a rear-facing seat can reduce injuries by 9095 per cent – this is far better than the figure of 60 per cent for forward-facing seats.

However, the seat must be used properly.

Also, NEVER use a rear-facing seat on a front seat unless the airbag has been disabled.

Airbags are designed to protect adults, but can seriously injure or even kill a child.

What is ISOFIX? Isofix stands for International Standards Organisation Fix, and is a new standard in cars that makes fitting a child seat quick, easy and safe. Without ISOFIX, the seat is held in place by the car’s adult seatbelt, which can be tricky if you don’t know what you are doing. Car safety experts in Mothercare explain further: “The ISOFIX system uses latches on the back of the car seat, which attach to fixed anchorage points in the car, effectively creating a rigid link between the two. A much simpler and safer way of installing car seats, it helps ensure they offer the best possible protection in the event of an collision.” The universal system (three anchorage points) is used for forward-facing seats, while the semiuniversal system (two anchorage points with supportive leg – this is car-specific, so consult your manual) is used for rear-facing baby and child seats.

What about the harness?

A five-point harness is used until your child weighs 18kg or 40lbs (around the age of four). Don’t be tempted to move your child before this, as a five-point harness offers much better fit and protection than an adult seatbelt. When you fit the seat, check that

the harness is firm; as a general rule, you should only be able to get two fingers between the straps and your child’s body.

Can I save money by buying secondhand?

We’re all for saving money, but a secondhand car seat is not a good idea. You can’t tell if the car seat has been in an accident (and therefore its safety may be compromised), and its seatbelts may be worn or frayed, so might not be as effective or as tight as they once were.

When should I move my baby up into a child seat?

Keep your baby rear-facing for as long as possible. There is now a bigger selection of rearfacing child seats on the market, if you want to postpone moving your child to forward-facing until about the age of four. These are the official guidelines from the RSA: • Rear-facing baby seat – up to 13kg (29lbs) (approx. 12-15 months) • Forward-facing child seat (with five-point harness) - 9-18kgs (20-40lbs) (approx. 9 months to four years) • Booster seat with sides - 15-25kgs (3355lbs) (approx. 4-6 years) • Booster cushion - 22-36kgs (48-79lbs) (approx. 6-11/12 years)

What are combination seats?

Many baby carriers are portable, so you can transport a sleeping baby from the car to the house without disturbing them – or you can attach onto your travel system’s chassis for a shopping trip. But if you’d rather a fixed seat, a combination car seat (also called Group 0+/1) will take your baby from birth to about four years of age. They are fixed in the car and are used, initially, as a rear-facing baby seat, then turned to the front when your child can sit unaided.

Where can I get more advice?

For safety, the RSA’s website (www.rsa.ie) is a treasure trove of information. When buying, go to a store that has inhouse experts on car seats, preferably experts who can look at your car, advise you on the best model for you and your needs, and fit the seat if needed. Baby stores like Mothercare can advise you, or specialist motoring shops like Halfords offer fitting and free advice.

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48 PRACTICALS

Car Seats: OUR TOP PICKS Don’t know what seat is the best? Or when to move your child? Here are some of our favourite seats on the market today.

Portable baby seat

Adaptors

Combination seat

PEBBLE PLUS INFANT CARRIER, €199, MAXI-COSI A carrier like the Pebble Plus allows you to carry your baby from home to car without disturbing her sleep.

The Pebble Plus is the first infant carrier to meet the EU i-Size (R129) regulation, which tightens up safety for young children making rearwardfacing seats mandatory up to 15 months.

BUGABOO CAMELEON CAR SEAT ADAPTORS, €45 It’s a good idea to plan your travel system and car seat purchases together, as you may be able to buy adaptors and use your infant carrier on the chassis on your travel system. Some stores offer combo deals, comprising a travel system, car seat and adaptors.

GROUP 0, 1, 2 CAR SEAT, €100, BABY ELEGANCE If you’d rather have a fixed car seat, then a combination seat might be the answer. This model from Baby Elegance is used rear-facing until your baby is 10kg, then can be used as a forward-facing seat until your child is about 25kg (about six years of age).

Isofix base

Front-facing

High-back booster

BESAFE IZI GO ISOFIX BASE, €159, TONY KEALYS Several brands offer bases with their infant carriers, which make inserting and removing the seat a breeze. The base is held in by Isofix fittings or by the seat belt, and the carrier is easily clicked in and out using a simple button system.

BRITAX ADVANSAFIX, €299.99, MOTHERCARE If you’re keen to move your child to forward facing, but want a seat that will last, then look for one that spans Group 1-2-3. This will work for your child until they reach the age of 12; plus this Britax model allows you to use the safer five-point harness until 25kg.

GROUP 1-2 ISOFIX CAR SEAT, €140, BABY ELEGANCE Once your child has reached 1518kg in weight (around the age of four), you can switch to a seat that uses the regular car seat. Look for a booster seat with well-padded sides to offer good side-impact protection for your child.

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Rear-facing 2-WAY PEARL, €249, MAXI-COSI Rear-facing is overwhelmingly safer than forward-facing, when it comes to infant child seats. It’s mandatory for babies to be rearfacing, but a growing number of Group 1 seats allow your child to travel rear-facing up to 18kg (age four). The 2-Way Pearl is easy to install and use, and can be rearfacing with the Maxi Cosi 2WayFix base (€225).

Booster cushion GRACO 2-3 BOOSTER SEAT, €26.49, ARGOS Only move to a booster cushion when your child is above 22kg (about the age of six) - remember that a booster seat is always superior. The adult seat belt goes around the child and the seat, so make sure that the seat belt is correctly adjusted.

27/07/2015 09:02

maxi-cosi

Families

Discover the axissfix Maximum safety for your children Maximum ease of use for Parents The Maxi-Cosi AxissFix is a clever car seat that combines state-of the-art i-Size safety with improved head and neck protection and a unique 360° swivelling system.

Rearward facing

axissfix

Approx. 4 months to 2 years

Experience the ease of use and outstanding safety with AxissFix, which offers up to 2 years* of rearward-facing travel and can be used forward-facing from 15 months up to the age of 4**.

Forward facing

15 months to approx. 4 years

Find out more at

www.maxi-cosi.co.uk/axissfix *87cm (approx. 2 years old) **105cm (approx. 4 years old)

i-Size safety

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50 FAMILY LIFE

FAMILY MOTORING

Thinking of investing in a car to fit your growing family? Make sure you know what you’re buying with our guide to choosing a family car.

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igh. Remember when choosing a new car involved pretty colours, soft tops and “important” accessories like cup holders and sunglass compartments?

Just like the rest of your life, your attitude towards cars changes completely once you start considering a family.

“BK (before kids), I had a gorgeous cream convertible Mini,” says Jayne, mum to Jessica (3) and Hugh (18 months). “I kept it until my second pregnancy but then realised that it just wasn’t practical anymore. It was a sad day when I waved goodbye to my beloved Mini. Now my focus is on space, safety and ‘wipe-clean’.

Boring but practical! That said, I’m fantasizing about a tiny convertible for just me when the kids have grown up!”

Your priorities when it comes to choosing a car simply have to change once you have little ones to consider. Safety is one aspect, but another is space. That bulky travel system is pretty useless if you have a tiny boot, for instance.

And what if you need to fit three childseats in the back seat? Read on for our checklist of the

things you need to consider when choosing a family car.

Number of passengers This is probably the best place to start. How many children do you have? Are you planning on having more in the near future? And do you have any pets? Many cars cannot fit three childseats in the back, so this is an important consideration if you’re planning on having more than two. Some middle seats in the back only have a belt over the lap – if this is a concern for you, look for a car with a full three-point belt in the middle. In addition, avoid cars with “bucket” shaped seats or a back seat with a hump in the middle, as these may make fitting a child seat troublesome. If you have a dog, make sure the car can hold both a child and the dog, preferably with a solid barrier between the dog and the passengers.

Childseats On the subject of childseats, check the attachments. Does the car have ISOFIX? Will you

have to use the seatbelts in the car? Or do you have an infant carrier base that you want to fit into the car? Will this compromise the remaining space in the car? For more on ISOFIX, turn to p47. If your children are young, you might also want to avoid three-door models, so you can get small kids or an infant carrier out easily and quickly.

Safety concerns

Renault Scénic

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Check how many airbags there are, and if it’s a secondhand car, make sure they’re in working order. Remember that you must disable the passenger airbag if you are planning on putting a rear-facing infant carrier in the front seat, so check that you can easily enable and disable the airbag. Other features that can be invaluable if you have a young family include an interior locking system, remote locking and an interior trunk release button.

In terms of overall safety, when researching your car choice, it’s well worth referring to the Euro NCAP, or European New Car Assessment Programme, which gives a single star rating that takes into account the scores achieved by the vehicle in the areas of adult protection, child protection, pedestrian protection and

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51 FAMILY LIFE

BUYING SECONDHAND A new car will be covered by a guarantee and warranty, but when buying secondhand, it’s important to do some background checks before purchasing.

The Competition and Consumer Protection Commission’s website, www.consumerhelp. ie has a comprehensive list of checks when buying a car.

BMW 2 Series Gran Tourer

“safety assist” (features like seatbelt reminders and speed limiters). These ratings can be found on www.euroncap.com

Using the car Next, you need to consider how the car will be used. If you are doing short trips in and around a town or city, you might be looking for something that’s easy to park and maneuvour. Or if you are planning lots of long family trips, you might appreciate features like a good sound or video system and air conditioning. Think, too, about where you will park the car and the sort of terrain you will be driving on (you might want a four-wheel heavier car if you are living in a rural area). Finally – and we can’t emphasis this enough – check the car’s storage compartment. Can you fit the buggy into the car? Will you be able to do the week’s shopping and fit that in as well as the buggy?

You’d be surprised how many boots are not big enough for some popular travel systems.

Consider the pros and cons You may be fixated on the actual cost of the car, but another consideration is the ongoing costs, such as tax, insurance, petrol and main-

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tenance. Some things, such as tax and insurance, can be figured out with a simple phone call or by logging on to www.motortax.ie. For things like reliability, talk to other car users, or Google for information. An unreliable car may be cheap to buy but it could end up a financial drain further down the line.

TOP PICKS ✹ Winner of the 2014 maternity & infant Award for Best Family Car, the Renault Scénic (LEFT) wins our vote for its spacious boot and wide backseat, which can fit two Isofix childseats and a booster seat. Trust us, these are difficult to find unless you go for a full-on seven seater… ✹ The BMW 2 Series Gran Tourer (ABOVE) is set to be a firm favourite among families for its flexible interior: a sliding second row of seats with adjustable backrest, a third row of seats that fold into the floor, and provision for up to five universal child seats. ✹ Other family-friendly models worth checking out include the Volvo V40, Nissan Qashqai, Ford Focus, Hyundai Santa Fe and Opel Zafira.

Look at the outside first: ✹ Visible signs of damage – dents, scrapes and panels or doors not matching up evenly. ✹ Broken or cracked lights and marks on bumpers. If light clusters are not the same make, they may have been damaged and replaced after a crash. ✹ Other signs of damage, wear and tear such as rust under the sills or wheel arches. ✹ Tyres that are different makes or unevenly worn. This could mean they may have been replaced following damage. ✹ Are there signs of leaks on the ground where the car has been standing for a time?

There could be a simple explanation for this but you should always ask. ✹ Check the spare wheel and full wheel replacement kit. If the car has alloys, make sure you get a “key” to release and secure.

Then, check the oil: ✹ Look for the oil dipstick and oil filler cap.

The oil should be up near the max level on the dipstick, not very low and not over filled (both are as equally damaging). ✹ If there’s no oil, don’t buy the car. ✹ If the oil is as black as coal it indicates the car hasn’t been serviced in a while. If it’s golden it normally indicates clear oil (most diesel oils will be darker). If the oil on the dipstick is creamy or coffee colour, this normally indicates that the oil is mixing with the water and the head gasket is gone.

Then, check the inside of the car: ✹ Check how many airbags the car has and ask if they work. Ask if the car has other safety features such as a three-point centre seat belt in the back, ISOFIX, ABS etc. ✹ Check and take a note of the reading displayed on the odometer. The average annual mileage of petrol cars is about 17,000 kilometres. Diesel cars could have an average of about 24,000 kilometres (15,000 miles). Ask the seller to confirm in writing the correct mileage reading. ✹ Check the wear and tear on the seat covers, pedal rubbers, gear knob or steering wheel to see if it is consistent with the displayed odometer reading.

For more, log on to www.consumerhelp.ie

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53 THE BREAST ADVICE

HOW TO

BOND WITH BABY Bonding goes a long way beyond the method you use to feed your child. CLIODNA GILROY, NUK Ireland breastfeeding advisor and mum-of-two, tells us more.

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was at a product launch with a number of sports journalists a couple of weeks ago. There was a lot of talk about filing copy and meeting deadlines. I mentioned that I write a column for maternity & infant on breastfeeding (and how understanding the editor is when it comes to me meeting deadlines). The first question asked was “Do you write about how breastfeeding means a father can’t bond with his baby?” to which I responded “No, because that’s ridiculous”. He went on to tell me how his wife didn’t breastfeed as it would have been unfair on him and he would not have been able to bond with his child had she made that choice.

There were many arguments I could have had with this man but mostly I wanted to clock him over the head and send my sympathy to his wife for having such an unsupportive lump of a husband. In reality, I walked away and ranted to anyone who would listen about the idiot I had met that day. But, the more I thought about what he had said to me, the more I felt that he had poorly expressed a good point.

When you’re expecting your first baby you do weigh up the pros and cons of breastfeeding. It does create a wonderful bond with your child but does it mean your partner will be left out? Granted only a mother can breastfeed, but while bonding is a good reason to breastfeed, it doesn’t prevent anyone else from bonding with your child. I often get asked ‘will my partner feel left out if I’m breastfeeding?’ It’s funny how nobody feels like they’re missing out if they don’t get to change all the nappies.

Firstly, breastfeeding is a free and on-demand form

of nourishing your child; it is a lovely way to bond with your baby but is by no means the only way. Secondly, we all know plenty of mothers who bottle feed and I wouldn’t in a million years doubt the bond they have with their children. It takes just as much love and a lot more care and organisation to get up in the middle of the night and sterilise bottles, count scoops of formula and wait for the water to be the correct temperature.

So how do those who are not breastfeeding a baby develop a bond? My first answer is always: take care of all the other baby’s needs. A child in a dirty nappy will find so much joy in the comfort of a clean nappy. Bath times are great fun and Daddy can take charge in this too.

Many women choose to express a bottle and give Daddy the chance to feed the bedtime bottle to their little one.

It’s also worth remembering that your baby is a tiny little person and week by week their personality starts to shine through. I would have said that I have a great bond with my children and felt that with 18 months of breastfeeding each of them that I would be the centre of their universe. Not so. From four months, my son showed a preference for my mother. Let me clarify that my mother is not the type of Grandma that comes vying for the attention of her grandchildren with sweets and presents.

She likes crosswords, Countdown and quiet, and this suits my little boy just fine. The bond that they have has taken us all, including my mother, by surprise.

So if someone questions how people other than you are supposed to develop a bond with your breastfed baby, let them know the next nappy change is on them!

“Breastfeeding is a free and on-demand form of nourishing your child; it is a lovely way to bond with your baby but is by no means the only way.”

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54 MULTIPLES

TWINS:

HOW IRELAND’S SURGEONS ARE SAVING LIVES A team of talented Irish surgeons is performing a cutting-edge procedure that is saving babies diagnosed in utero with twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome.

DR JOANNA GRIFFIN finds out more.

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55 MULTIPLES

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wins occur in 1.5 per cent of all pregnancies in Ireland. Twin pregnancies come with increased risks but most result in delivery of two healthy babies. Fetal medicine has greatly improved in Ireland in recent times, and a recent Irish study – the ESPRiT study – showed excellent outcomes in twin pregnancies. Nevertheless, all multiple pregnancies are classified as high risk and some associated complications need medical attention and monitoring. These can often only be picked up at antenatal appointments, stressing once again the importance of attending each scheduled visit.

Twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome (TTTS) is one such complication in multiple pregnancies. If left untreated, 90-100 per cent of such cases result in death of one or both babies.

In 2006, the Irish National Fetal Laser Programme was established under the direction of Professor Fergal Malone at The Rotunda Hospital, together with Prof Fionnuala McAuliffe and Dr Stephen Carroll at the National Maternity Hospital. Its aim is to treat TTTS using new laser technology. Examination of the first 100 such cases performed in Ireland demonstrate that specialist obstetricians in Ireland remain at the cutting edge of global developments in fetal surgery and are achieving outcomes for Irish mothers and babies that are similar to those available in the world’s leading medical centres.

and remove the abnormal blood vessel communications between the twins. This effectively separates the circulations of both twins from each other, allowing the heart failure to improve in one baby, while the growth-restricted baby will also improve.

What is twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome?

Treatment outcomes in Ireland

TTTS is a life-threatening complication of identical twin pregnancies, in which there are abnormal blood vessels in a shared placenta. Approximately 20 per cent of twins will share a single placenta (called monochorionic twins), and most identical twins share one. This shared placenta can be problematic because shared connections exist between the two circulations.

Blood can be transferred disproportionately from one twin (the “donor”) to the other (the “recipient”). The transfusion causes the donor twin to have decreased blood volume, slowing the donor’s development and growth. The blood volume of the recipient twin is increased, which can strain the fetus’s heart and eventually lead to heart failure. There is no way to prevent TTTS and it is not caused by anything the parents did or did not do. However, with close monitoring of a twin pregnancy it can be detected and treated.

How is TTTS treated?

The optimal treatment for patients with severe twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome involves placing a tiny camera called a fetosocope through the mother’s abdomen and into the womb, where a tiny laser fibre is used to find

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The Irish National Fetal Treatment Programme The Irish National Fetal Treatment Programmewas established to ensure that patients in Ireland with complicated twin pregnancies could avail of the most highly advanced treatments without having to leave the country.

“Prior to this programme, patients with complicated twin pregnancies faced the onerous situation of having to fly to the United Kingdom or further afield while suffering from severe symptoms associated with twin pregnancy,” explains Professor Malone. “Flying to another country while pregnant with a complicated twin pregnancy is risky for the mother’s health and that of her unborn babies.

To be able to provide the most advanced fetal surgical procedures here in Ireland is safer, more convenient and more economical for our patients and the Irish healthcare system.”

The programme comprises of a single fetal surgical team from The Rotunda and The National Maternity Hospitals and acts as a national referral centre for all 19 obstetric units in Ireland.

To date, the team has carried out laser surgery on over 100 cases of TTTS and have recently published in the European Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology and Reproductive Biology, reporting on their survival rates and also on the neurodevelopment outcomes of the babies. In Ireland, using laser as treatment for TTTS, both babies survive in 47 per cent of cases, and at least one baby survived in 75 per cent of cases. The survival rate for twins is comparative to that achieved internationally, and 86 per cent of babies have normal brain development. “Our results demonstrate that three quarters of babies with this life-threatening complication survive and grow into healthy children,” says Professor Malone.

Advice for women pregnant with twins or more Identifying the number of placentas in a twin pregnancy is critically important. Professor Malone recommends that all pregnant women

FIRST PERSON “I had my scan in the afternoon and was in surgery by 6pm that evening.”

MICHELLE AND EAMONN’S TWIN BOYS HAD THE LIFESAVING PROCEDURE DONE THREE YEARS AGO AT THE ROTUNDA HOSPITAL. Michelle and Eamonn Corrigan from Swords, Co Dublin, discovered they were expecting twins during an early scan at seven weeks in her second pregnancy. Everything was going well until their 20 week scan at The Rotunda Hospital in April 2012 when TTTS was diagnosed. “I had my scan in the afternoon and was in surgery by 6pm that evening,” says Michelle. Both babies survived the surgery, but nevertheless Michelle and her babies were closely monitored for the rest of her pregnancy. Two boys, Eric and Sean, were delivered at almost 32 weeks, and after spending five and six weeks respectively in the neonatal intensive care unit at the Rotunda Hospital were discharged home. They are now healthy boys and celebrated their third birthday in July. Michelle says she trusted the fetal medicine team and had a very positive experience at the Rotunda. “I was 100 per cent confident in the team and felt like I was the only patient in the hospital,” she says.

should have an ultrasound examination before 12 weeks’ gestation to confirm twins, and to confirm whether or not both babies share one placenta or have two different placentas. “For mothers with twins that share a placenta it is essential that they have ultrasound examinations at least every two weeks from 16 weeks’ gestation onwards, so that the features of TTTS can be discovered in time to allow lifesaving fetal surgery,” he adds.

FOR ADDITIONAL INFORMATION AND SUPPORT, CONTACT Twin to Twin Transfusion Ireland www.tttsireland. com Twin to Twin Transfusion Foundation www. tttsfoundation.org

“In Ireland, using laser as treatment for TTTS, both babies survive in 47 per cent of cases, and at least one baby survived in 75 per cent of cases.”

27/07/2015 09:47

56 PREGNANCY & NEW BABY

Motherhood HARMONY Can music therapy have a positive effect on the relationship between mothers and their babies – even before they are born?

ANNEMARIE NÍ CHURREÁIN looks at the growth of music therapy resources in Ireland and how it can benefit Irish mothers.

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27/07/2015 09:23

57 PREGNANCY & NEW BABY

P

regnancy and early motherhood is, for most women, a positive journey.

For others, it is a challenging time.

According to Nurture, a charity offering childbirth and pregnancy support, 10,000 mothers in Ireland battle with antenatal depression every year, 90 per cent of mothers will face the “baby blues”, and 1-2 out of every 10 mothers will receive a diagnosis of post-natal depression. With a growing trend away from medication towards physiological and psychological treatments, music therapy has been proven to help women manage some of the issues arising from these experiences, including stress, anxiety and worry.

Music in every form has a therapeutic potential, but music therapy is the intentional use of music-based interventions, by a trained therapist, to help adults and/children achieve change in their lives. In Ireland, music therapists qualify at the University of Limerick and register with the Irish Association of Creative Arts Therapists (IACAT – which are currently lobbying for statutory recognition of the profession under law). In the practice, many music therapists draw upon influences of psychology, psychotherapy and psychodynamic theory.

Unlike a teacher, the goal of a music therapist is always clinical. His/her ultimate task is to create a safe and non-judgmental space for the client, and to support each individual onto a path of deeper self-awareness and care.

Music therapy & pregnancy “Where there are complications or anxieties during pregnancy, music therapy can be beneficial to help establish a supportive relationship and to work musically to provide comfort and support,” says Professor Jane Edwards, Director of the MA in Music Therapy at the Irish World Academy of Music and Dance, University of Limerick. As a means of relating, music therapy has the potential to elaborate the emotional bond of the mother towards her unborn baby, with the mother having the opportunity to explore any of her feelings and/or conflict in relation to motherhood. Singing in particular is recommended for the ‘bump’, and experts recommend that mums do this as well outside the therapy room (but remember that headphones should never be put on the ‘bump’ as they may amplify sounds in damaging ways).

Around 20 weeks in utero, hearing develops and the first rhythm the baby hears is the maternal heartbeat. Increasingly, research confirms that simple sing-song vocalisations have the same structure as the music that is composed and performed by professionals. The baby loves lullaby songs and will respond positively. By the time the child is born he/she can even recognise the mother’s voice.

“As a music therapist myself, I sang, played and listened to music during each day of my pregnancy,” explains new mother Lucia Mc-

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Ginnis. “Singing in particular helped me cope with difficult hormones. When adopting music therapy techniques, I could literally feel the baby inside me becoming still and comfortable. Ever since my son was born he has responded strongly to music, stopping to gaze quietly when I start playing.”

Resources for growing children All the evidence suggests that playing music to the womb in later pregnancy means children are more responsive to music after birth. Newborns may be soothed by musical sounds, and premature babies exposed to music could have an increased ability to tolerate noise. These children may also have reduced heart rates and sleep more deeply than other children.

As these kids grow older, parents may wish to explore some of the excellent apps recommended by music therapists, including one called Bloom. Part instrument, part composition and part artwork, Bloom’s controls allow

and have a challenging relationship with their own interior world.”

In these therapy sessions, Browne uses music therapy to calm, soothe and encourage the bond between mother and child. Many of the techniques she uses are mindful and draw upon attachment theory. “I often help mothers become aware of their breathing, for example. Using a rainstick, I can measure the mother’s breathing pace and, using the instrument in a demonstrative way, encourage her to find ways of controlling and regulating her breath.”

Similarly, she uses clear rainsticks and coloured balls with toddlers, encouraging them to turn it over, and take a deep breath as all the balls fall from top to bottom. This is a practical way of showing them how to extend their breath, relax, and reconnect to themselves. For kids, she also uses familiar songs to “meet them in their world”. Some of the songs reference body parts, ie Head, Shoul-

“Music therapy has the potential to elaborate the emotional bond of the mother towards her unborn baby, with the mother having the opportunity to explore any of her feelings and/or conflict in relation to motherhood.” anyone to generate patterns and unique melodies by simply tapping the screen.

An Irish charity that regularly brings music therapy benefits into the community is the Blue Box Learning Centre, which serves Limerick and the local surrounds. Founded in 1997, Blue Box programmes provides a safe space for children during difficult times by offering music therapy to kids of all ages including those with physical, learning, social or emotional difficulties. Working mainly in schools, the group also runs a preschool initiative called LEANBH, catering for adults (including pregnant women) and children.

This initiative seeks to enrich the parent and child bond by playing musical games that foster healthy social and interaction models.

“Overall there is less stigma today about accessing therapy,” says music therapist Maeve Browne, who previously worked with LEANBH and is now self-employed in the Cork area.

“But sometimes mothers do feel judged or blamed for the difficulties they or their children are facing. It’s my job to create a supportive environment, where these women can explore their feelings around motherhood and child bonding”.

ders, Knees and Toes, to connect to the child to the mother in a bodily way, encouraging togetherness, the touching of fingers and hands, and sharing turns. “A mother can be in a vulnerable place with mental health issues and exhaustion, and my role is to attune her again to the emotional needs of her child.”

In Ireland today, there are over 70 music therapists registered with IACAT. These therapists work in a variety of settings, including hospitals, prisons, schools and community venues. Many music therapists work in private practice and take private referrals.

Session costs vary (depending on the skills, training and location) of the therapist, with the typical music therapy session lasting for about one hour. A full music therapy programme may last weeks or months depending on the need and progress of the client.

“Take a leap of faith,” suggests Browne.

“Music therapy is experiential, and when delivered by a trained therapist, it is totally safe.

It’s a non-intrusive and client-led therapy with a strong international evidence-base and the potential to empower pregnant women, mothers and children at all stages.”

If would like to learn more about Music Individual sessions In her practice, Browne regularly sees mothers Therapy interventions, further reading can be with young children who are experiencing stress found from The Irish Association of Creative or anxiety and she believes that these negative Arts Therapists at www.iacat.ite. Self-referfeelings can become transferred to the children. rals can also be made direct to Lucia McGin“When this happens, a child’s coping mecha- nis of North West Music Therapy at www. nisms can become dulled. Lots of children I see nwmusictherapy.com/ or Maeve Browne at have difficulty relating to their own emotions www.music4children.ie

27/07/2015 09:23

58 DEVELOPMENT

GETTING THROUGH THAT

Phase UNFAZED

Ah toddlers. One day they’ll eat anything, the next day they’ve taken against everything.

Or they start asking “why?’ all. the. time. DAWN GEDDES dusts off her war wounds and offers some sage advice on getting through those toddler phases with the minimum of fuss and bother.

A

few months ago my five-year-old daughter asked me to explain the meaning of love. This is an easy one, I thought, before explaining it as “that lovely warm feeling you get when you’re with someone you really like.” “Oh!” she said, nodding along as if she understood perfectly, before delivering a killer line “Mummy, I don’t think I love you.”

Ouch!

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Phases.indd 58

I tried to explain it in a different way, telling her that all mummies love their children and all children love their mums, but she wouldn’t budge. That one conversation turned into weeks of my lovely, but determined, little one telling anyone who’d listen that she didn’t love them. It’s just a phase, everyone told me! Don’t worry, it’ll pass!

Childhood phases can come out of nowhere and take us completely by surprise. One day

your child is a great eater, the next they’re refusing to eat anything that resembles a vegetable. One day your toddler will wear anything you put them in, the next it’s a tutu and wellies or nothing. These situations are stressful for parents, but when we handle them badly it only leads to our children becoming frustrated and prone to dramatic outbursts and spectacular meltdowns.

By staying calm and collected, you’ll help

27/07/2015 09:36

59 DEVELOPMENT

THE FOUR PHASES

1

The fussy eating phase

Last week your child loved broccoli, this week it’s “yuck”! Fussy eating is incredibly common in children, but it’s incredibly frustrating for parents.

Most of the time this phase will pass by, but we’ve all heard horror stories of children who survived on a diet of macaroni cheese alone! Try to provide your child with a varied diet every day, even if they do refuse to eat it. By regularly offering them vegetables and other nutritional goodies, they will have plenty of opportunities to try healthy foods and will see them as a normal part of mealtime. Making their meals and snacks into an animal shapes or faces can also encourage fussy eaters – it’s amazing what you can do with a little bit of imagination and some cookie cutters! Most importantly, make sure that you lead by example and eat a healthy balanced diet too. Real Mum advice “When I make spaghetti bolognese for my kids, I sneak in the peppers and onions by liquidising them. My kids are never any the wiser.” Johanna MacKinnon, mum of four

2

3

4

“One day your toddler will wear anything you put them in, the next it’s a tutu and wellies or nothing.”

The curiosity phase

You’ll know you’ve hit the curiosity phase when every sentence starts with “why”. While you want to encourage your child’s learning, having to explain everything from how electricity works to how babies are made can get quite wearing after a while. Add in a newfound fascination with their body parts and this phase has parents cringing everywhere! Curiosity is a big part of being growing up and a very natural stage of childhood. While it is tempting to discourage our children from asking awkward questions, it’s really important not to. How else are your children supposed to learn if they can’t ask you? If the constant questions are getting tiring, make a list together and set some time aside to tackle them one by one. This is especially helpful for their more embarrassing questions that tend to pop up at the most inconvenient times. Becoming fascinated with their bodies is also very common and it is best to just ignore it if you can. It’s crucial that you don’t make them ashamed of their body; it does belong to them after all and it’s only natural for them to be curious about it. Real Mum advice “When my children are asking hounding me with questions that are tricky to answer, I always say ‘well, what do you think?’ It gets them every time!” Kerry Fleming, mum of two

The independent stage

your child get through these phases quickly and as painlessly as possible. Try not to stress or overanalyse, it really won’t help – take it from someone who knows. After two weeks of worrying about my own daughter’s declaration of unlove, I decided to relax and stop fixating on it. Just days later she stopped mentioning it and by the following week she’d returned to her normal and very loving self. Phew!

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Phases.indd 59

“Mummy I do it!” is the catchphrase of defiant toddlers everywhere. Whether they’re demanding to make their own snack or are snatching the colouring-in pen from you to draw their own pussycat, there is no arguing with a child in the independent stage. Wanting to dress themselves and choose their own clothes is also a big part of this stage, leading to your child sporting all sorts of interesting combinations. This phase is all about control. You’ve been making all the decisions up until now and they’ve now decided to put their little foot down. Try not to say no all the time, but instead think of compromises.

If they want to help you make a meal, encourage them to carry out small tasks such as putting the vegetables into a bowl or setting out their plate.

When it comes to choosing clothes, give them a choice of two outfits instead of total freedom and don’t make them wear something that they really don’t like. Try to respect their choices whenever you can. Real Mum advice “One of the little girls I looked after when I was a nanny insisted on wearing a woolly hat with ear flaps all the time, even during blistering hot summers in London.

She even slept in it! Now my own child insists on wearing shorts every day. Maybe he’ll grow out of it, but at the end of the day if he’s happy, I’m happy. You’ve got to pick your battles.” Lynn Walsh, former nanny and mum of two

The “I’m scared” phase

Childhood fears can seem totally irrational to us parents. Whether your child is going through a phase of being scared of creepy crawlies, loud noises or the dark, these fears can make a real impact on your day-to-day life. Although children usually grow out of this phase, some fears can be carried right through to adulthood so it’s important to help them to tackle any issues. Encourage your child to speak about their fears and pinpoint exactly what they are scared of.

If they’re scared of the noise of the Hoover, is it the fact that it startles them or do they associate it with something else? Getting their worries out in the open can sometimes be enough to make them go away. Sorgenfresser Worry Eaters are great for helping children to tackle their fears. Help your child to draw a picture of their worry on a piece of paper and then feed it to the cuddly toy monster through his zip mouth, banishing it forever.

Real Mum advice “My daughter used to be terrified of spiders. I started naming them and talking about how Peter had just popped in for a visit. I know it sounds crazy, but it really helped. I don’t think she’ll ever be able to pick one up, but she doesn’t scream the place down anymore.” Claire O’Neill, mum of three.

27/07/2015 09:36

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27/07/2015 23/03/2015 17:32 12:31

61 HEALTH

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT…

TOILET TRAINING

Toilet training is a big step for your little one, and it can often take a while for them to master. The secret is timing, patience and lots of love.

Q

At what age should I begin toilet training my child? Each child is

different and there is no set age or rule of thumb as to when to begin toilet training.

However, usually parents begin introducing the potty to their children when they are in the ‘toddler’ age bracket, so anytime from age two onwards. Toddlers may even express interest themselves in using the potty, so it’s really all about striking a balance between your toddler’s interest, awareness and age.

Q

How will I know my child is ready? Your toddler may express an interest, but more often than not it’s usually a case of trying it out with them and seeing how they respond. Try getting them to sit on the potty to get used to it while you explain how it works. If your child is able to express to you in either facial reaction or words when they need to go, is telling you they don’t like the feel of wet nappies, and is staying dry for two hours or more during the day, then they could be ready. If they respond well to the potty and seem to understand the idea when you explain it, then try going ahead with the toilet training. If they seem uninterested or unsure of what to do, hold off and try introducing it again in a month.

Q

How do I start? If you think your little one is

ready to start potty training, make a plan for yourself.

Make sure that you have a few days off in a row.

Giving yourself a window of time where you are not going to be over occupied with other tasks at the same time will help place focus on the toilet training, and allow you to be repetitive with the routine over a few straight days in a row. This will achieve better and quicker results, as well as keep the learning process fresh in your toddler’s mind.

Q

3

45

What are the best toilet training tactics? To begin,

start off by getting your toddler acquainted with the potty. Maybe buy them a potty in their favourite colour, explain what it is and let them ask questions about it. Be enthusiastic, and every time your toddler uses the potty or follows the technique you have created, react in a positive and enthusiastic way. Teach them a routine - remove the pull-ups, go potty, wash hands - and have some fun with it by making your routine into a song or a rhyme. A reward system is also a great tool for positive reinforcement. By rewarding your little one with a small treat every time they try or by creating a ‘potty chart’ will enforce positive association with using the potty, making it more fun and easier for them to want to try.

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Q

When do I switch from nappies to pull-ups and underwear? Again, try not to feel pressured to make the switch if your child is taking longer than anticipated to master the potty, as no child learns within the same time frame or even in the same way. Whether you use pull-ups or not really depends on you and your child. Some parents like to go straight to underpants as the child might be more aware if they wet underwear. Others find pull-ups a godsend. Nap and night-time training can take a little longer, and pull-ups can be invaluable for this. Many children don’t master staying dry at night until they are four or five, so be patients and don’t rush your child. In the meantime, use pull-ups and a mattress cover.

27/07/2015 08:48

62 FAMILY LIFE

Modern FAMILY

The recent referendum on same-sex marriage brought up plenty of debate on family life and the “new normal”. Consultant psychologist DR NICOLA DAVIES looks at the latest studies to see how children fare in a non-traditional family unit.

I

n May, Ireland legalised same-sex marriage via a national referendum, the first to do so by popular vote. We joined the ranks of several other nations, which include Argentina, Belgium, Canada, South Africa, UK, and Uruguay. On June 26th, the United States became the 21st country to legalise same-sex marriage as the result of a US Supreme Court decision that ruled that the denial of marriage licenses and recognition to same-sex couples violated the Due Process and

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Modern Families.indd 62

Equal Protection clauses of the 14th Amendment of the United States Constitution.

The reality of non-traditional families is becoming more commonplace and is often referred to as the ‘new normal.’ In 2013, there were 13,000 samesex couples raising children in the UK. According to the peer support group, LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) Helpline, there are no official figures as yet on the number of LGBTheaded families in Ireland; however, many LGBT persons are already parents and an increasing

number of others are planning to start a family.

Non-traditional households don’t only include families with lesbian mothers and gay fathers, but also those with parents who have sought assistance with having children in the form of embryo, sperm or egg donation, in vitro fertilisation (IVF), and surrogacy. Indeed, The Institut Marques, a leading Spanish fertility centre, report that since 2011, increasing numbers of single Irish women have been flying to Barcelona to receive fertility treatment.

27/07/2015 09:14

63 FAMILY LIFE

COMMON ISSUES The passing of the same-sex marriage law is evidence that Ireland has gained greater awareness, tolerance and acceptance for families who aren’t traditionally structured. Despite this exercise in liberal thinking, however, there is still strong opposition against these new family forms, with many issues raised.

ISSUE: Stigma still exists The stigma regarding children in non-traditional family units still exists. Dolce & Gabbana triggered controversy when they referred to children born through IVF as “synthetic babies.” Ray Kinsella, spokesperson for Mothers and Fathers Matter in Ireland, also expressed concern that the legalisation of same-sex unions could impact the bond between children and their biological parents. A 2008 study

by Fairtlough on young people with gay or lesbian parents in the UK, US or New Zealand reported that half experienced homophobic comments or abuse from schoolmates and other parents. However, a 2008 UK study by Ian Rivers indicated that although children of gay or lesbian parents experience victimisation from peers, the same was also true for children of opposite-sex parents.

Experiences of discrimination, stigmatisation, ostracism or rejection can have tremendous psychological and behavioural impacts on young people. A 2009 study by Richman and Leary reported that a person who is ostracised responds either by seeking acceptance, growing angry, or becoming socially withdrawn. People discriminated against in relation to gender, race or sexuality tend to withdraw. However, the study also found that children can overcome issues caused by rejection as long as they have supportive and alternative relationships with friends and family members.

ISSUE: Children look for their missing biological parent The US Family Research Council cited a 2001 study by Yale Child Study Center psychiatrist Kyle Pruett, which reported that children born with the assistance of IVF, “often ask their single or lesbian mothers about their fathers.” However, children of heterosexual parents who went through divorce or adoption also reported having experienced the same longing for the missing biological parent, indicating that this issue isn’t unique to homosexual families.

ISSUE: All children need both a father and a mother In most families, the presence of a father is known to reduce antisocial and delinquent behaviour among boys and sexual promiscuity among girls. An early study by David Popenoe in 1999 suggested that a strong marriage

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Modern Families.indd 63

between mother and father provides a daughter with the confidence to resist early sexual engagements. On the other hand, the nurture of mothers is considered a necessity in raising an infant. One school of thought contends that the prevalence of non-traditional families will increase the number of children who don’t have either a mother or a father, but the impact of this varies from family to family.

ISSUE: Children raised by homosexual parents said to be at a disadvantage A 2012 US study by Mark Regnerus found that the intact biological family (IBF), which the study defined as ‘pro-family,’ was still best for raising children and that children raised in families with lesbian mothers (LM) or gay fathers (GF) grow up at a disadvantage. According to the study, 69 per cent of LM kids and 57 per cent of GF kids were likely to receive welfare when they were older, while the same was

cognitive development, and substance abuse.

This study also maintained that socioeconomic circumstances and family stability were the main factors that affected child wellbeing, not the gender or sexual preference of the parents.

A UK study by Susan Golombok compared 41 gay father families, 40 lesbian mother families, and 49 heterosexual families, all composed of two parents and an adopted child. According to Golombok, “Parental sexual orientation is unrelated to children’s socio-emotional or gender development… The quality of parentchild relationships, the quality of parents’ relationships with each other, and the quality of the wider social environment were found to be more predictive of children’s adjustment than the gender, genetic relatedness or sexual orientation of the parents.”

A 2014 study conducted by the RAND Corporation, on European single parents and their employment, found that 20.4 per cent of

“Despite the stigma against same-sex fathers, mothers and parents who are single by choice, many studies report that psychological and developmental problems among children from non-traditional families are no more common than those among children from traditional families.” true for only 17 per cent of children from IBFs. The results also showed that LM and GF kids tended to have lower educational attainment and were more likely to experience depression.

Critics say, however, that Regnurus studied homosexual families who had gone through a recent unstable event such as divorce. Therefore, the negative outcome that their children experienced couldn’t be directly attributed to the gender or sexual orientation of the parents.

The study didn’t compare stable homosexualheaded families with stable traditionally parented families.

UK households were headed by single parents.

It noted that previous studies have suggested a negative impact of single parenthood on the educational attainment and employment opportunities of children, and single mothers were disadvantaged when it came to securing full-time employment to support their families. However, this study included people who became single parents through divorce, separation or death of a spouse, and not by choice. Single women who have sought the assistance of IVF, sperm donors, egg donors and surrogacy stress that they became parents by choice.

ISSUE: Gender and sexual orientation of parents have no significant effect on children’s wellbeing.

Conclusion

Despite opinions that express concern about same-sex parent families, a growing number of reliable studies continue to show that the family’s quality of relationships and socioeconomic status are more influential in a child’s psychological development than the number, gender, sexual orientation or biological relatedness of their parents, or their conception.

A 2014 study by Wendy Manning on American children who lived in same-sex parent households reported that they fared just as well as children with heterosexual parents in measures of academic performance, psychological health, early sexual activity, social and

More countries are allowing the marital union between two people of the same gender and affording them the same rights as traditional couples. Furthermore, the number of same-sex couples and single people seeking the help of adoption agencies or fertility clinics is increasing. Despite some stigma remaining, many studies report that psychological and developmental problems among children from non-traditional families are no more common than those among children from traditional families. The wellbeing of children has more to do with the family’s economic standing and stability – two factors that can also be problematic for most traditional families.

27/07/2015 09:14

The must-have family Cooking app Filled with delicious recipes for the whole family to enjoy and a fun interactive cookery course for children, Annabel’s app is the ultimate kitchen staple.

Download from the app store www.annabelkarmel.com

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27/07/2015 14/07/2015 11:45 16:11

65 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

LUNCHBOX

HEROS

Think outside the box with these delicious lunch recipes from Annabel Karmel.

Forget soggy ham sandwiches and instead liven up kids’ lunchboxes with super salads, wraps and muffins to keep tums full until teatime.

See Over ➽

HONEY CHICKEN WRAPS

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27/07/2015 08:52

66 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

➽

From page 65

Honey Chicken Wraps Preparation: 10 minutes (plus marinating

time) Cooking: 10 minutes Makes: 4 wraps

✹ 2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, sliced into strips ✹ 1 tbsp oil ✹ 1 tbsp each soy sauce, lemon juice and honey ✹ 4 tortilla wraps ✹ a little light mayonnaise ✹ 2 tomatoes, deseeded and sliced ✹ ¼ cucumber, sliced into thin batons ✹ Iceberg lettuce, shredded ✹ 50g Cheddar cheese, grated

Put the chicken into a bowl. Pour over the soy sauce, lemon juice and honey and leave to marinate for as long as possible. Remove the chicken from the marinade using a slotted spoon. Heat the oil in a frying pan and fry the chicken for 5 minutes until golden and cooked through. Warm the wraps for 1 minute in the microwave and set aside on a plate.

Spread the mayonnaise along one end of a wrap, top with tomatoes, cucumber and lettuce, then spoon over the chicken and sprinkle with the cheese. Roll up around the filling, tucking in the sides so the wrap is sealed at both ends. Cut the wrap in half diagonally. Repeat with the remaining ingredients. These wraps are delicious hot, but can also be allowed cool and refrigerated for a lunchbox.

PINEAPPLE RICE SALAD

BOW-TIE PASTA SALAD WITH TURKEY

Pineapple Rice Salad

Bow-Tie Pasta Salad with Turkey

Preparation: 5 minutes Cooking: 15 minutes Makes: 2 portions

Preparation: 5 minutes Cooking: 12 minutes Makes: 4 portions

✹ 110g/4oz cooked chicken or ham, shredded ✹ 2 spring onions, thinly sliced ✹ 2 rings tinned pineapple, drained and cut into cubes ✹ ½ small red pepper, diced ✹ 2 tbsp drained tinned sweetcorn ✹ 55g rice ✹ 1 tsp rice wine vinegar ✹ 2 tsp sunflower oil ✹ ½ tsp honey

✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹

Cook the rice according to packet instructions and allow to cool. Mix together the vinegar, oil and honey and season with salt and pepper.

Stir this dressing into the rice with the chicken, spring onion, pineapple, pepper and sweetcorn. Refrigerate until needed.

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150g bow-tie pasta 60g broccoli florets 50g frozen peas 50g tinned sweetcorn 100g cooked turkey, chicken or ham, diced ✹ 50g Emmenthal, diced DRESSING ✹ 3 tbsp olive oil ✹ 1 ½ tbsp white wine vinegar ✹ 1 ½ tsp caster sugar or honey ✹ 1 tsp soy sauce

Cook the pasta in boiling salted water according to the packet instructions.

Add the broccoli and peas and cook for 4 minutes. Before the end of the cooking time, drain and refresh in cold water. Mix the pasta and vegetables with the sweetcorn, turkey and cheese.

Mix the dressing together and pour over the pasta. Season to taste.

27/07/2015 08:52

67 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

CARROT, APPLE AND SULTANA MUFFINS

Carrot, Apple and Sultana Muffins Preparation: 10 minutes Cooking: 22 minutes Makes: 12 muffins

✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹

175g self-raising flour 1 tsp ground ginger 1 tsp ground cinnamon 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 100g light brown sugar 2 eggs 3 tbsp golden syrup 150ml sunflower oil 150g carrots, peeled and grated 50g apple, peeled, cored and grated 75g sultanas

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Preheat the oven to 200°C/400°F/Gas 6. Line a muffin tin with 12 paper cases. Sift the flour, spices and bicarbonate of soda into a bowl, then add the sugar. In a separate bowl, combine the eggs, syrup and oil, then pour them into the bowl with the dry ingredients. Whisk until smooth. Stir in the carrot, apple and sultanas.

Spoon the mixture into the muffin cases. Bake for 20–22 minutes, until the muffins are well risen and golden brown. Allow the muffins to cool in the tin for about 10 minutes, then transfer to a wire rack to cool.

Keep little ones busy this summer with Annabel’s BRAND NEW Family Cooking app. As well as lots of simple, tasty recipes, it includes a special Kids Rule the Kitchen cooking course designed to feed young imaginations whilst teaching essential cooking skills. Available via the App Store.

27/07/2015 08:52

WATCH THEM GROW!

The Source of Home & Garden Inspiration

Ireland’s Largest 5 Star Garden Centre Gaybrook, Mullingar, Co. Westmeath Tel: 044 9342088 www.omearasgardencentre.com MI Aug_Sept 2015_Ad Template.indd XXXXXX_1C_O'Mearas_M&I.indd 1 29 tbc-fc-OMeara-ot-m&i.indd 1

27/07/2015 17:33 23/03/2015 14:50 03/02/2012 16:32:11

69 LIFE AFTER BABY

Childcare Reform A recent study has shown once again that childcare in Ireland is more expensive than the majority of EU countries. Tell us something we didn’t know. A blueprint document published by the government at the end of July looks to radically overhaul the sector, proposing such measures as extending paid parental leave from six months to a year; adding an extra pre-school year; and capping the cost of childcare at €4.50 an hour (lower for those on low incomes). The snag? The proposed changes are costly and would take several years to implement.

However, we are liking the sound of these changes, and we’re hoping that this isn’t just pre-election empty promises. And so we’re putting forward for consideration the results of another study: every euro invested in good care and education in the early years can deliver up to seven times its investment in terms of improved outcomes for children. So even if it’s going to take years and a serious financial commitment to deliver, now is the time to put the foundation in place for good-quality, subsidised childcare and early years education. We have waited long enough for it.

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27/07/2015 09:17

70 BEAUTY & STYLE

A

t 9am our make-up looks flawless and pristine, and our carefully chosen products have filled our heads with false hopes of all-day wear. However, somehow, by lunch, it seems to have withered, along with our confidence in our make-up’s abilities. Time is of the essence when you’re a busy mum and also have a million other jobs to juggle, so how then can we rely on our make-up to act as the long-lasting hero we need to serve us all day? The secret is in your technique.

FACE CLEANSE: The first and most important rule for attaining long-lasting make-up is cleaning your canvas. Start by cleansing your face so that the products you apply to it will not sit on any unseen dirt or oil on the skin, which can result in make-up sliding off before you’ve even left the house!

Try Clarins Gentle Foaming Cleanser, €25, to cleanse and clear the skin.

This non-drying, milky cleanser removes excess oil without drying out the skin, creating the perfect fresh-faced base for your next step.

MOISTURISE: Next, apply a non-oil moisturiser. Oil-free moisturisers aid all-day lasting make-up as they don’t oils that can result in your foundation sliding off. NARS Aquacel Luminous Oil-Free Moisturiser, €53, is great

for moisturising the skin without leaving an oily residue, allowing your foundation to set quicker.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR MAKE-UP LAST

all DAY

Whether you’re running after the kids or at work sorting through a mountain of paperwork, time is of the essence, and make-up retouching is something we just don’t have the time for. Need an all-day lasting answer to your make-up prayers? Look no further.

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Beauty All Day.indd 70

PRIME: A primer is your next step and is essential when wanting to achieve that stay-all-day make-up look. Laura Mercier Foundation Primer, €41, primes your skin for foundation application, minimizing imperfections and demands your make-up stay put, helping it to last all day long. Catrice Prime and Fine, €4.99, is also a great base primer to prevent any potential slide!

FOUNDATION: The trick to foundation application is to not overdo it. Too much can create a cakey look, which is not what you want! Keep the foundation light and trust what’s going on beneath it (your moisturiser and primer) to do their job in creating a hold for your foundation. We love Bobbi Brown Longwear Lasting Foundation, €40, for long-lasting cover.

27/07/2015 08:56

71 BEAUTY & STYLE

[TIP] Put your concealer on before your foundation. This is a small trick that makes a big difference. L’Oréal Lumi Magique Highlighter Pen, €12.85, will help contour and illuminate your face on the areas that need highlighting, and by applying it first you will use less foundation around it, as you will see the places already covered, so it’s also a money-saving tip!

[TIP]

Looser and wider spanning bristles on your powder brush will help prevent a cakey effect, having more room to spread the powder unlike constricted tighter bristles on tighter brushes.

EYES Eyeshadow lovers, say hello to your new best friend: primer. It’s not only important to prime your skin to hold your foundation, but also to prime your eyes to keep hold of your eyeshadow. Powder eyeshadows are better for all day wear than cream, as cream can slide due to its oily texture. Use Urban Decay’s Eyeshadow Primer Lotion, €23, for long-lasting eyeshadow. When it comes to lining the eyes, gel or liquid eyeliners see for longer lasting results than pencil, which can easily rub off.

Try Rimmel’s ScandalEyes Thick and Thin Eyeliner pen, €6.99, and Inglot’s Gel Liner, €15, for a longer lasting all-day liner and ScandalEyes Xxtreme Mascara, €6.49, for volume

and dramatic length.

BLUSH Powder can sometimes create a cakey effect on the skin, especially after being worn for a few hours, so when it comes to blushes, cream or liquids are slightly more reliable.

You can spread them more easily with your fingertips and you can see the colour building up as you apply, preventing overuse. Try Giorgio Armani Blush Fabric Second Skin Blush, €36, which is beautiful on the skin. We also love No 7’s Pop & Glow cream blush, €12.95, which screws up like a lipstick

for a super easy application.

POWDER Choosing a powder will depend on personal preference and what works best with your skin, but loose powder tends to work better for a longer-lasting effect than pressed, as the powder is looser and less likely to become cakey.

Try the Clinique Blended Face Powder and Brush, €30.

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Beauty All Day.indd 71

BROWS

LIPS Lipsticks and liners can fade quite easily. If you lean your hand against your face or eat even a morsel of food, they seem to disappear, but Rimmel’s new Provocalips 16 Hr Kiss Proof Lip Colour, €8.99, does exactly what it says on the tin and lasts the whole day long, giving you lasting colour and no need for touch-ups! Line the lips for a fuller lip effect with Charlotte Tilsbury Lip Cheat Iconic Nude Lipliner, €22. Nude is also a great way of cheating a bigger lip effect.

The trick for getting brows to set is using a wax to shape and a setting powder to set the eyebrow into place for a long-lasting effect. Benefit Browzing, €31, comes with a wax for shaping and powder for setting, as well as a tweezers and small hard angle and blending brush.

FINISHING TOUCH For guaranteed all day wear, lightly spray some of Urban Decay’s Setting Spray, €29, over your face to hold your makeup in place until you’re ready to take it off.

FIVE MINUTE FACE Only have five minutes to get ready? Mission accepted Try this four-step make-up routine to have you looking fabulously flawless in under five minutes.

1

PRIMER/CONCEALER/ FOUNDATION: Max Factor 3in1 Foundation, €14.99, is a primer, concealer and foundation in one, giving you sebum control, coverage and highlight all in one formula, the perfect option when you’re stuck for time.

EYES: Thicken your lashes in just one coat with the Lancôme Hypnôse Mascara, €27.50, with added pigments that will make your lashes look six times more voluminous!

BROWS: Brows shape the face and are an important step in your makeup routine. If you’re stuck for time then the Benefit Speed Brow, €17, will give you the perfect brow in half the time.

LIPS & CHEEKS: Combine your lip and cheek routine by tainting your lips and cheeks with one product with Benefit’s Benetint Cheek & Lip Stain, €34.50. With a gorgeous rose-tint, this kissproof and waterproof tint will provide you with a beautifully subtle blush and lip stain to last all day.

2 3 4

27/07/2015 08:57

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23/03/2015 13:07 27/07/2015 17:35

73 TREND

Leather envelope clutch, €49.95, ZARA

Sleeveless rollneck top, €40, Topshop

Light pink high-neck t-shirt, €37, River Island

Olga Berg navy bag, €49, Fabucci

Bottom panel skirt with piping, €69, Cos

Daniel Wellington classic Sheffield watch, €159, Campbell Jewellers

Red skirt, €14.99, H&M

M&I

MUM

RUPA Ghillie sandals, €71, Topshop

Leather high-heel shoes with perforated detail, €69.95, Zara

STYLE Structured hemlines are no more this coming autumn/winter season. Both flouncy and fun, the dropped hemline can be worn in the office and for evenings out.

Pale blue lightweight wool mohair polo neck, €125, Cos

Black high-neck rib top, €10, Penneys

Valentino travel wallet, €740, Brown Thomas

Skirt, €107, Betty Barclay Juno James sterling silver cuff bracelet, €70, The Design House

Earrings, €7.99, H&M Knitted chequer skater skirt, €12, Penneys

Mineral grey felted wool backpack €190, Cos

MI Aug_Sept 2015_MumStyle.indd 73

Black leather heeled Chelsea ankle boots, €75, River Island

KAISER ankle tie shoes, €80, Topshop

27/07/2015 09:20

74 MUMS & WORK

BLOGGING:

A CAREER CHOICE? Getting your writing into the public eye is easier than ever thanks to the explosion of blogs on the internet – but can a blog make you money? Or lead to a new lucrative career in writing? maternity & infant meets successful bloggerturned-writer Andrea Mara from OfficeMum.ie to find out more.

O

nce upon a time if you wanted to become a writer, you tried to get a job on a magazine or a paper and worked your way up. Or you started writing at home and pitched your work to publishers and editors. A successful writing career was seen as something fairly elusive in Ireland, especially if you didn’t have contacts in the publishing industry, with a good deal of luck needed to progress. All that has changed significantly in the last decade. The Internet has opened up a whole new world for wannabe writers, and blogs have proven a good way to showcase work or even start a career.

Early blogs like The Huffington Post, Daily Beast, Mashable and Gawker made their founders millions, while bloggers like Perez Hilton are now household names. Ireland has been slower to get on the blogger wagon, but success stories like beaut.ie has shown that it is possible for a blog to grow and to launch successful careers.

One of our favourite bloggers, Andrea Mara, whose blog Officemum.ie won the Glenisk Parenting Blog of the Year 2015, has just made the leap into freelance writing after getting recognition for her writing skills, and explains how her blog grew from somewhere she could let off a bit of steam into launching a viable career.

“I started blogging a little over two years ago,” she says. “I had gone back to work after my third maternity leave and was looking for a way to connect with other working mothers – to chat about the typical challenges we all face, like balancing work and family, finding good childcare, scraping the glass ceiling, and dealing with the guilt.

MI Aug+_Se[pt 2015_Mumpreneur.indd 74

“Originally I just wanted to let off a bit of steam – to write specifically about working mother topics, to connect with other mums, to have a voice of sorts, and to vent. I had no longterm ambitions, and the great thing about blogging is that you don’t need to have long-term ambitions. Particularly if you start anonymously as I did, you can try it out without committing to anything more than a first post.

“After a few weeks, I broadened into writing about general parenting topics or anything at all that came into my head, and became utterly addicted to blogging. It was a form of therapy after a long day at work – but always a hobby, never a chore. I was asked then to do some writing for other publications, and earlier this year, I took redundancy from my job in funds and moved fully into freelance writing. So while my blog is still first and foremost a hobby – a space that is completely mine to say whatever I want – it’s a platform for freelance writing now too.”

Success story While Ireland has a long way to go in comparison with the States, where blogs and sites can make money almost from the off, a degree of success is possible. “Like most Irish people, I have a healthy aversion to saying anything that could be construed as getting above my station, but I’m very happy with how the blog is going,” says Andrea. “I’ve been the lucky and grateful recipient of two awards – Best Parenting Blog at the Image Blog Awards last year and Best Overall Parenting Blog in the Glenisk Irish Parenting Blog Awards earlier this year.

“And readership is still going in the right di-

rection – a rule of thumb for bloggers is not to compare with other blogs (if you happen to know their reader statistics) but rather to look at your own current page-view figures compared with previous months. If your readers are increasing, you’re doing something right.”

Success is also possible on a practical level.

“Brands are realising the benefits of working with bloggers here in Ireland, so there are more and more opportunities for reviewing products,” explains Andrea. “The difficulty is, knowing when to say no. For me a significant benefit is exposure – as I moved towards freelance writing, blogging was a great way increase my profile and get more writing opportunities.

“If you put time and effort in (lots of time and lots of effort…) you can build up readership and profile, and in time, this brings op-

27/07/2015 09:52

75 MUMS & WORK

FIRST PERSON

Andrea’s top tips for a successful blog

portunities. It might be in the form of product reviews, sponsored posts or advertising options, or it could open a door to something else, such as freelance or fiction writing, or TV and radio opportunities.”

Making a start Interested in giving blogging ago? The great thing about blogging is that once you’ve decided what you want to write about, you can start almost immediately. You don’t even need to be a computer whizz, as Andrea explains.

“There’s no need for any great levels of savvyness at all. Most of us are already using computers at work and know how to use social media. If you can type, you can start a blog.”

Broke too? Don’t let that stop you. “You don’t need to spend money,” says Andrea.

“There are plenty of great-looking free themes

MI Aug+_Se[pt 2015_Mumpreneur.indd 75

available on Wordpress and Blogger. A clean, white background usually works best – too much clutter can be distracting for the reader.

You can customise as little or as much as you like (depending on the theme) – adding social media buttons, badges, a bio, a photo of yourself. After that, it’s down to the blog posts – images you use, and of course, the words you write.”

So, put up a few blog posts, publicise via social media outlets like Facebook and Twitter and keep adding to it regularly. Welcome to the blogosphere!

CHECK OUT Want to read more parenting bloggers? Check out the winners of the Irish Parenting Blog Awards 2015 at www.irishparentingbloggers.com

Choose your subject matter and blog name wisely – don’t pigeonhole yourself to one topic (with a corresponding name) in case you want to broaden your horizons later. A blog called “MyPregnancyDiary.ie” might be relevant now but not so much in nine months’ time (just as “OfficeMum.ie” becomes a little less accurate after switching to freelance work from home!)

Put some thought into choosing your platform – the two most popular are Wordpress and Blogger. Both have pros and cons, but once you start, switching from one to the other can be a pain, so explore both before you set up your blog and hit publish on your first post.

When writing blog posts, use images to break up text. Taking your own photos is a good idea – it avoids the risk of using images that are not free for general use, and makes the blog post more personal. Also be sure to check spelling, and if you have a grammar question, Google it.

Attention spans are getting shorter, so no need to write too much. About 600 to 800 words is good; less could be even better, depending on the topic. And longer is fine too – with blogging, there really are no rules – it’s your space, and that’s the beauty of it.

Network with other bloggers. When you start out, especially if you’re anonymous, it can be difficult to know how to reach readers. It feels like talking into the ether. But connecting with bloggers is a great way to find readers – you read theirs, and they’ll read yours. I’m part of an amazing online group called the Irish Parenting Bloggers – it’s a fantastic support network for blogging, as well as for general parenting questions, Get into social networking. Facebook and Twitter are great media for sharing posts and building readership, and bloggers also use Pinterest, Instagram, and Google+. Engage with other users rather than just sharing your posts – it works better that way and makes it more enjoyable too It’s a cliché, but write from the heart. Write what you really think (within reason!) rather than what you think people want to read. The best blogs and the most popular posts are those with an unmistakable ring of truth.

Read Andrea’s blog at officemum.ie

27/07/2015 09:52

76 DAD’S DIARY

BRIDESMAIDZILLA NICK WILKINSON’s little daughter has been asked to be a flower girl – and is determined to be the star of the show…

O

ver the summer, my daughter was kept awake at night, excitement building over two events that she knew would change her life forever – being a flower girl at my brother’s wedding and starting junior infants. Her older brother only had one thing on his mind – whether I would sneak him into Jurassic World. While he was thinking of ways to look older, she spent weeks gazing at two very different outfits. One was her new school uniform. The other, her ‘wedding dress’.

My son shivered with dread the first time he saw her in uniform. Not even the velociraptors in that movie I categorically deny bringing him to were as scary as the thought of sharing his school bus with her.

But when she put on the bridesmaid’s dress, we all knew that we weren’t dealing with a common or garden bridezilla. We were facing the Indominus Rex herself. It began with the job description.

She was not a flower girl, she was a bridesmaid.

Not even my brother was allowed to mind his own suit before the wedding. He saw it once when he tried it on, then it was whisked away for safe-keeping. Our daughter was awe-struck when she tried on her frock. But things got ugly when the bride tried to bring it home again. She quickly realised that the dress was more likely to be damaged if she tried to prise it away. We agreed that it would be kept safe at home with us.

My wife put it in her wardrobe among her own clothes.

We woke the next morning to find the dress missing. I found it in our daughter’s bed. She was wearing it. To keep it really safe.

Over the next two weeks, we managed to keep the dress relatively clean – considering the number of times it had to be tried on to make sure it went with the shoes, the flowers and the chain for holding my mum’s glasses that was sacrificed to make a necklace to go with the whole ensemble.

On the night of the rehearsal, our flower girl took

instruction well, but I should have seen the warning signs when she stood at the altar, turned around and gave a theatrical bow to the empty pews. You can guess what happened as my brother and his new wife were pronounced man and wife. Their flower girl stood in front of the happy couple and outdid her usual bow with a bow/curtsey move that raised the roof. It happened again after the speeches, after his first dance and when they cut the cake. In fact, the groom had to pay more attention to his niece than to his new wife.

But what doting uncle could have resisted? I gave up trying to shoo her out of photos and enjoyed what I hope is the first of many nights dancing rock ‘n’ roll until midnight with my daughter. I should make the most of this stage before she finds me too mortifying to stand next to, let alone dance with.

The next day, I found several kids playing in the garden, gorging on leftover meringues and wedding cake icing. Centre stage, a little voice was trying to harangue them into order. It was my daughter, back in her dress, conducting another wedding – between her and a terrified cousin.

“Stop crying and say, I do. Then kiss me!”

The little boy wept louder.

She wore that dress every day for at least a week.

Climbing trees, painting, bike riding – it never came off. With the bride and groom due to return from their honeymoon, I was ordered to get it cleaned. But creatures like Indominus Rex have a sixth sense. The dress disappeared and has not been found. At least with it gone, our daughter had returned to her sweet self. Until I found her laying out her school uniform, a distinctive glint in her eye.

“I can’t wait to start big school,” she said.

My son gave me a stricken look and started to tremble.

Were those a T-Rex footsteps we could hear, or the sound of our hearts beating with fear?

“Their flower girl stood in front of the happy couple and outdid her usual bow with a bow/curtsey move that raised the roof.”

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Dads's Diary.indd 76

27/07/2015 09:09

77 COMPETITION

WIN!

A MEMORABLE FAMILY BREAK AT THE

Congratulations to Valerie Vaughan from Wicklow, winner of last issue’s competition!

BRIDGE HOUSE HOTEL

TULLAMORE, CO. OFFALY

A

FUN

stay at the Bridge House Hotel in Tullamore combines the best of all worlds, with plenty to keep both mum, dad and the little ones entertained!

The Bridge House Hotel is a fabulous fourstar hotel that feels like a resort, with so much to experience under one roof! The Hotel is home to the traditional Michelin Guide-recommended Charleville Restaurant, the busy and buzzing Bridge House Bar, an award-winning Carvery, and the relaxed Library Bar. You can also enjoy a taste of Mama Italia’s homemade cooking at Balcone Italiano Restaurant, or something casual at the Coffee Shop. Indulge in a little relaxation at the excellent Bridge House Spa or explore all the hidden gems that the local surroundings have to offer.

The Bridge House Hotel has also taken the stress away from parents wondering how they’re going to keep the little ones occupied with their ‘Busy Bees’ kids camps running from Monday to Friday from 9am-2pm during school holidays and the upcoming October midterm break. Filled with lots of fun games and sports activities suiting all ages, with activities including fitness hour in the leisure club, splash hour in the pool, arts & crafts, movie hour, cooking optional day trips and much more!

The Bridge House Hotel also provides the perfect base for exploring the local area and nearby attractions including Lough Boora, Birr Castle, IMC Cinema, Tullamore Pet Farm, Jumpin’ Jacks Play Zone and Annaharvey.

To celebrate the fantastic range of fun-filled family packages at the Bridge House Hotel they are offering one lucky maternity & infant reader a chance to win a two-night stay including a freshly prepared breakfast each morning and one evening meal on the night of your choice for two adults and two children.

If you’re not lucky enough to win on this occasion, check out the fantastic family offers available at the Bridge House Hotel by visiting www.bridgehouse.com or call +353 57 9325600.

FOR ALL

the family!

HOW TO WIN To be in the draw for this amazing prize, simply answer the following question correctly:

What is the name of the Michelin Guide-recommended restaurant at the Bridge House Hotel?

Email your answer and contact details to competitions@maternityandinfant.ie, with BRIDGE HOUSE in the subject line.

Or send a postcard with your answer and contact details, marked BRIDGE HOUSE, to maternity & infant, Ashville Media Group, Old Stone Building, Blackhall Green, Dublin 7.

Terms and Conditions: Prize includes 2BB1D for 2 adults and 2 children and is valid for 12 months. Prize is subject to availability and non-transferable. Closing date for all entries is 20th September 2015. Prize is non-transferable. Competition is not open to employees of Ashville Media Group or Bridge House Hotel & Spa. No cash or gift card will be awarded in lieu of stated prize. If any of the items offered are unavailable or out of stock, a suitable alternative will be provided. Winner will be selected at random from a draw and will be contacted by phone. Competition entrants must be resident in the island of Ireland. One entry per person.

Competition is also subject to all usual terms and conditions.

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Competition.indd 77

Bridge House Hotel, Tullamore, Co.Offaly T: +353 57 9325600 E: info@brideghouse.com W: www.bridgehouse.com

27/07/2015 11:31

78 SHOPPING

Name it

STORE DIRECTORY

A

Accessorize Stores nationwide; www.accessorize.com Alex and Ani Stockists nationwide; www.alexandani.com Arnotts Henry Street, Dublin 1; www. arnotts.ie ASOS www.asos.com

B

Boots Stores nationwide; www.boots.ie Brown Thomas www.brownthomas. com

C D

Cos Stores nationwide; www.cosstores.com

Debenhams Stores nationwide; www. debenhams.ie Dune Stores nationwide; www.dunelondon.com

MI Aug-Sept 2015_Store Directory.indd 78

E F

Easons Stores nationwide; www.easons.com

L

Fabucci Footwear www. fabucci.ie Frugi www. frugi.com

LEGO Stockists nationwide; www.lego. com Littlewoods Ireland www.littlewoods.ie L’Oréal Stockists nationwide; www. loreal.com

H

M

Harvey Nichols 16 Sandyford Road, Dublin 16; www.harveynichols. com H&M Stores nationwide; www.hm.com House of Fraser Dundrum Town Centre, www.houseoffraser.co.uk

I K

Isabella Oliver www.isabellaoliver.co.uk

Kilkenny Shop Stores nationwide; www.kilkennyshop.com

Mamalicious Selected stores nationwide; www.mama-licious.com Mamas & Papas www. mamasandpapas.com Marks & Spencer Stores nationwide; www.marksandspencer.ie Monsoon Stores nationwide; www.monsoon.co.uk Mothercare Stores nationwide; www.mothercare.ie

nameit.com New Look Stores nationwide; www.newlook. com Next Stores nationwide; www.nextdirectory.ie

P R

Penneys Stores nationwide; www.primark.co.uk

River Island Stores nationwide; www.riverisland.com

S

Seraphine www. seraphine.com Smyths www.toys.ie Sunglasses Shop Stores nationwide; www. sunglasses.ie

T

Topshop Stores nationwide; www.topshop.com

V

Vivien Walsh S93 Monkstown Rd, Monkstown, Dublin; tel (01) 2145444; www.vivienwalsh. com

Z

Zara Stores nationwide; www.zara.com/ie

N

Name it Stores nationwide; www.

27/07/2015 15:29

79 ASK THE EXPERTS

MEET THE

EXPERTS We have a wide range of experts on hand to answer your questions on everything from pregnancy and birth to sleeping, feeding, fitness and general wellbeing.

If you have a question that needs answered, get in touch!

GP

Dr Julius Parker

Embryologist

Dr Declan Keane

Physiotherapist

Dr Parker is a general practitioner with HSF Health Plan’s free 24-hour GP advice line and answers healthrelated questions for young families.

For more information on HSF Health Plan, visit www.hsf.ie or Lo Call 1890 473 473.

Dr Keane is a senior clinical embryologist with 20 years’ experience. He is director of ReproMed fertility clinics in Kilkenny and Dublin, with a third clinic opening in Limerick this year.

For more information, call Declan on (01) 685 6755 or visit www.repromed.ie.

Jenny is a chartered physiotherapist and partner at Total Physio in Sandyford, Co Dublin, and sees many women during and after pregnancy., treating issues like pelvic girdle pain.

She is also mum to Jamie and Holly.

For more information visit www.totalphysio.ie.

Sleep Consultant

Obstetrician

Dietitian

Lucy Wolfe,

CGSC, MAPSC Lucy is a paediatric sleep consultant and mum of four. She runs a private sleep consulting practice where she provides knowledge, expertise and valuable support to families across the country.

Visit www.sleepmatters.ie.

Jenny Branigan

Dr Sam Coulter-Smith

Ruth Charles

Dr Coulter-Smith is a consultant in obstetrics and gynaecology, master of the Rotunda Hospital and a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynaecology at the Royal College of Surgeons. Visit www.rotunda.ie

Ruth is a dietitian with the Early Feeding Clinic, which offers advice on becoming pregnant, nutrition during pregnancy and feeding your baby.

For more information, visit www.earlyfeedingclinic.ie.

Ask the experts... If you have a question regarding any aspect of your pregnancy, new baby or toddler, please get in touch.

Email us at editorialdesk@ashville.com or write to us at maternity & infant, Ashville Media Group, Old Stone Building, Blackhall Green, Dublin 7.

MI Aug_Spet 2015_Ask the experts.indd 79

27/07/2015 10:07

80 ASK THE FERTILITY EXPERT

Q

Q

Time-lapse imaging

Post IVF

My clinic has offered me time-lapse imaging to supplement my IVF cycle.

What exactly is this?

I am about to start my fourth and what I believe will be my last IVF cycle.

If this doesn’t work, what options have I left?

Current standard laboratory practice for grading embryos requires the embryos to be removed from the incubator and assessed using a microscope. This allows a “snapshot” of the embryo development at a particular time point. These assessments are only performed a couple of times during an IVF cycle to prevent any extra stress on the embryo. This can prevent embryologists from seeing the whole developmental picture of that embryo. Time-lapse imaging is a new technology that offers a potential solution to this issue. By placing a camera inside an incubator, the laboratory is able to take multiple pictures of developing embryos, and therefore monitor their growth. These systems do not impact on the embryos and provide additional information on embryo development to laboratory staff. This can assist the final embryo selection, ensuring that those embryos with the highest potential of creating a pregnancy are transferred to you.

It is always psychologically very difficult for a woman to “close-out” her IVF journey. I do not know your specific medical history but there may be a case here to consider egg donation (or sperm donation if your partner also has fertility issues). We recommend meeting with an experienced psychologist who can help you get to grips with the different aspects of using donor gametes to achieve a pregnancy. If it is an option you wish to pursue, egg donation can be a very successful treatment with success rates generally up to approximately 70 per cent. A donor egg treatment cycle generally involves taking fewer medications and having fewer scans and blood tests than a conventional IVF cycle. It also means that you do not have to undergo a procedure as invasive as the egg retrieval, just the embryo transfer, which is comparable to having a smear test. The donors tend to donate for altruistic reasons and are chosen anonymously for you based on you and your partner’s physical characteristics. Most clinics have a large base of donors from which to choose, so there is a good chance of finding a good physical match. We vet all the clinics with whom we work to ensure that the donors are screened appropriately and treated ethically, and that all treatments are carried out to the standard that we expect of our own clinics.

Q

IUI treatment My partner and I have been having some fertility investigations and our consultant has recommended IUI treatment using his sperm, as the preparation of the sperm will give us a better chance of becoming pregnant. What does this involve for me?

IUI, or intrauterine insemination, is where a processed (washed) sample of sperm is injected directly into a woman’s uterus. For the female partner, there are a number of routes the IUI may take. The option most likely to be successful for you will be recommended by your consultant. Firstly, there is natural follicle tracking IUI. This is when your cycle will be tracked via ultrasound to see when a dominant follicle is produced naturally. When the follicle is at a size that is likely to contain a mature egg and ovulation may be imminent the IUI procedure will be scheduled by your clinic. You may be prescribed an oral medication called clomid (clomiphene). This is a medication that causes the pituitary gland to secrete the hormones necessary to stimulate ovulation. With IUI it may be recommended to take an injectable FSH (follicle stimulating hormone medication). If prescribed, FSH injections are administered by you at home and the cycle is monitored by ultrasound by your clinic. Don’t worry, your nurse at the clinic will teach you how to use the injections and make sure you are 100 per cent confident – they are there to support you through your cycle.

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QUICK GUIDE

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All about…

HOLISTIC HELP

2

What is…

ANOVULATION?

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If you are undergoing fertility treatment, make sure your lifestyle is healthy, to ensure your egg and your husband’s sperm is of the best quality.

Make sure you are eating a wellbalanced diet with plenty of fresh fish, fruit and veg; go for a walk together a few evenings a week for both the exercise and the time together; avoid stress and take time out to relax; and watch your alcohol intake – stick to just a glass of wine with dinner.

Anovulation is when the body does not ovulate during the menstrual cycle. It can be an isolated occurrence or a continuing problem.

It is due to either a hormone or chemical imbalance, or is a functionary problem with the ovaries themselves. There are a number of ovulation induction therapies that you can try. Talk to your fertility specialist about the best one for you.

Most clinics in Ireland are happy to use donor sperm in procedures.

The donor sperm is imported by the clinic on your behalf from donor banks abroad. New legislation due to come into effect requires the donor’s details to be added to a register in Ireland. Your chosen clinic will be able to guide you in choosing a donor best for you.

Question IS DONOR SPERM AVAILABLE IN IRELAND?

27/07/2015 10:07

81 ASK THE OBSTETRICIAN

Q

Q

Low amniotic fluid

Pregnant & size 20 I’ve just found out I’m pregnant and I’m thrilled, yet slightly shocked as it wasn’t planned. There’s only one thing worrying me – I’m a size 20 and I was planning to lose weight before trying for a baby. I’m terrified that my weight is going to affect the baby. Can I do anything about it now?

As a size 20 you are probably carrying a little bit of extra weight, which means that you are more prone to some complications. For example, you will be more prone to developing gestational diabetes. You might also be more prone to carrying a bigger baby, which would increase the chances of both instrumental delivery and caesarean section. There are certainly things that you can do even while pregnant to keep control of your weight. A sensible caloriecontrolled diet and moderate degree of exercise will both assist in getting your weight down to a more manageable level. Most hospitals have access to dietician services. It would be appropriate for you to contact your maternity services and ask for a referral to the dietician for assistance.

Q

Avoiding toxoplasmosis What is toxoplasmosis and how can I avoid it during pregnancy?

Toxoplasmosis is an infection that can be picked up by anyone, usually following contact with cat faeces or ingestion of inadequately cooked meat. Somewhere between 15 and 30 per cent of adults have antibodies to toxoplasmosis infection, indicating that they have already been in contact with it at some point during their life. Primary infection occurring during pregnancy is unusual and occurs somewhere between 1 in 500 and 1 in 1,000 pregnancies. Almost all of these infections are asymptomatic and not of consequence. In unusual cases, primary infection can have an adverse effect on the baby causing brain and eye problems for the fetus. Toxoplasmosis is something that is not screened for routinely in Ireland and the way to avoid the risk of infection is by ensuring that meat is well cooked and observe careful handwashing practices if you are a cat owner or in regular contact with cat litter.

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I’ve been told that my amniotic fluid is low. What does this mean and should I be worried? I’m 30 weeks’ pregnant.

If you have been informed by your doctor that the amniotic fluid level around the baby is reduced then you are most likely already having regular ultrasound scans. Amniotic fluid is the fluid that surrounds the baby within the womb. The level of amniotic fluid is an indirect measure of placental function; in other words, if the placenta is functioning well then there should be an adequate amount of fluid around the baby. If placental function is starting to deteriorate then the fluid around the baby may become reduced. This is something that your doctor will be monitoring through regular ultrasound scans, usually one to two weeks apart.

If the fluid volume continues to deteriorate you may be admitted to hospital for more intensive monitoring.

There is also the possibility that it will be decided that baby needs to be delivered slightly early, in which case you will most likely be given steroid injections to mature the baby’s lungs. It may be possible to induce labour, but it is more likely that you will end up with having delivery

by Caesarean section in this particular situation.

QUICK GUIDE

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All about…

LEG CRAMPS It is very common for women to get leg cramps during pregnancy, particularly at night. Cramps can be so severe that they cause continuing pain for a day or two afterwards. This can be confused with a blood clot in the calf muscle at the back of the leg.

If you are worried about this, you should consult your doctor to get reassurance.

2

What is…

CORD BLOOD BANKING? Sam says: Saving cord blood is a service that is commercially available in Ireland, but maternity hospitals do not provide it.

Although individual consultants may be involved in the collection of cord blood, it is not something that the hospitals believe is currently of any benefit to patients. There is the possibility that in the future saved cord blood may be of use but this does not appear to be the case right now.

3

Question WHAT IS A VBAC? A VBAC stands for Vaginal Birth After Caesarian. The chances of you being able to have a VBAC depend largely on the reasons for your C section.

If your first baby was born by section because he was too big or your pelvis was too small, then the chances of having a VBAC are reduced. Your best chance of a successful VBAC is if you go into labour spontaneously.

Your obstetrician will be able to advise you on whether a VBAC is possible or suitable for you.

27/07/2015 10:07

82 ASK THE DIETITIAN

Q

Q

Lunch for Junior Infant

After-school sports

My little boy is starting school in September and he’s very excited! He needs to bring a school lunch each day – how much food should I be giving him?

I have two children in primary school, both of whom do sport as part of their after-school activities three days a week. These are busy days for both of them, and I’m sure they need more food – but what can I give them that’s portable, quick and enough?

The short answer is that the longer a child spends in school or childcare the more food they need to bring and eat. School lunch should provide the nutritional equivalent of a child-sized meal but time can be a big limiting factor.

The actual time allocated to eating in school can be very different from what a child is used at home: 5-15 minutes is usual. Wrappers, lids and packaging that need adult help are best avoided, as are “spillable” food like yogurt drinks.

Give enough food that you know your child can easily manage to eat in 10-15 minutes and take it from there. Lunchbox foods need to be filling and sustaining with slow release of energy over the school day. This ensures that your child has the ability to be able to concentration, work and play like they should. Drinking plenty of water is really important. Not drinking enough can cause headaches and dehydration, which can affect concentration and energy levels.

Q

Yoghurts & cereal bars I’m always looking for new things for my child’s lunchbox. Are cereal bars and yoghurts good choices?

Did you know that it’s possible for a child to have eaten 5-6 teaspoons of added sugar before big break? A bowl of cereal, a glass of juice and a small yogurt can contain that much sugar. There are many foods that look the part and appear to be healthy choices, but when you check the ingredients in detail you find that sugar is often the second or third ingredient in the list. This can mean that the product contains a lot of added sugar. Cereal bars that contain just wholegrains, fruits and nuts are a better option than those that contain added sugar. The best choices of breakfast cereals are wholegrain ones, some with added vitamins, eg porridge and powdered oat cereal. Always check the ingredient section. When it comes to yoghurt, again, check for healthy ingredients like whole milk, yoghurt cultures and fruit. Try to steer clear of those that contain added sugar.

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School lunch should contain at least one portion of good quality protein – a small carton of full fat milk is a great choice. A matchbox size of block cheese (cheddar/edam/gouda etc) or cold meat (chicken/turkey/beef) are other options, but try not to over rely on processed cheese and ham that can contain too much added salt and preservatives. Hummus or Almond and Cashew spreads are packed full of protein and very tasty. For the starchy carbohydrate choices, choose from wholemeal pitta or unsalted crackers, best-of-both sliced pan, brown soda or wheaten bread, cold pasta or breadsticks. Mandarin easy peelers, grapes and banana are good fruit choices and easy to handle. For apples and pears, take out the core, quarter and wrap tightly in cling film to keep from turning brown. Carrot, cucumber and celery sticks are an alternative to fruit. Mix up the colours that you give them, as these foods contain the vitamins. For those doing afterschool sport give double the amount of protein and carbohydrate and include lots of water.

QUICK GUIDE

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In the early days of parenthood, it can be difficult to find the time to eat, never mind cook! Try these quick, nutritious snacks to keep your energy up: ✹ Boiled egg with wholegrain toast ✹ Beans on toast ✹ Cut-up carrot and cucumber with hummus ✹ Crackers with cheese ✹ Yoghurt with fruit ✹ Nuts and yoghurt ✹ Unsweetened cereal with low-fat milk

A toddler (after his first birthday) should only be drinking about 300ml of milk a day; more than this, and he won’t have the appetite for solid food. Give the milk in a beaker (with a lid at first) and make sure he is getting calcium from other sources too, like cheese and yoghurt. Unless otherwise directed, always give your toddler full-fat milk, as children this age need the higher fat content to help the body absorb vitamins A and D, and to gain weight.

Iron is vital for making haemoglobin, the red pigment that carries oxygen in blood, and myoglobin, which stores oxygen in muscles. A lack of iron can cause anemia, which can cause fatigue and weakness, and can affect brain development. Good sources of iron include fortified cereals, beans and lentils, meat (especially red meat), eggs and leafy green vegetables like spinach. Vitamin C helps absorption, so ensure your child’s diet includes berries and citrus fruit too.

Tip SNACKS FOR BREASTFEEDING

Question HOW MUCH MILK FOR A TODDLER?

All about…

IRON FOR CHILDREN

27/07/2015 10:08

83 ASK THE PHYSIOTHERAPIST

Q

Q

Aching back

Gentle antenatal fitness

My son is three weeks old and I also have a very active toddler. My back is aching. Can I do anything to help my back or will it just take time to recover?

I’m pregnant with my third baby and am not very fit. What exercises would you recommend if I haven’t been exercising prior to my pregnancy?

Yes, there is plenty that can be done in this early postnatal period to help you get back on your feet again. When feeding, place baby on a pillow so you don’t have to actively hold him to the breast. Be aware of your neck and shoulder muscles and try to actively relax them when you are feeding.

Watch your position changing their nappies – you can use a waist height table for your baby. It’s best to use the coffee table with a mobile toddler and kneel up against it to keep your spine straight. Avoid carrying your toddler on one hip, this throws your pelvis off balance and leads to increased stress on your already weakened spine. If you need to lift your toddler out of a tricky climbing situation, try to bend your knees and use your powerful thigh muscles (quads) to take his weight, not your back. Try to get your partner to do as much of the heavy work with your toddler as possible, as you are still recovering from the birth and are more at risk of an injury at this time. Be aware of your posture when standing and sitting. Stand tall as if you are being pulled to the ceiling by an invisible string. Try to tuck your tailbone down, which will take the pressure off your back and make you work your abdominal muscles.

Many women, once they realise they are pregnant, wonder what they can do to maintain previous levels of fitness and to strengthen their bodies in preparation for labour. Regardless of your pre-pregnancy levels, your fitness goals during pregnancy should be aimed at maintenance and not dramatic gains. Pregnancy Pilates is a great way to tone and maintain good postural and abdominal strength. It helps to strengthen your body to help you manage the new positions you’ll be in as a new mum, such as feeding, carrying the car seat, and lifting and pushing the buggy. Other benefits include teaching you helpful breathing techniques, working deep postural and abdominal muscles to support your bump and protect the pelvis and lower back, and strengthening your pelvic floor. Pilates is safe to do during an uncomplicated pregnancy, from 16 weeks onwards.

This allows time for feelings of fatigue and nausea to pass. It is not recommended to take up any new form of exercise in the all-important 1st trimester of pregnancy.

Pregnancy Pilates classes run weekly at Total Physio and are taught by Jenny. Email pilates@totalphysio for more information.

Q

Sciatica in pregnancy I am pregnant with my second baby, and my back is sore, with pains shooting into my right leg. Everyone is telling me that I have sciatica and that it will keep getting worse (I am 29 weeks pregnant now). Can you help?

You may be suffering from sciatica or pelvic girdle pain (PGP). Contrary to popular belief, you are not more prone to sciatica if you are pregnant.

Aches brought on by pregnancy tend to be in the pelvis and back, not around the sciatic nerve. Many women who think they have sciatica during pregnancy actually have pelvic girdle pain. The sciatic nerve comes from your lower back, travels down the back of your legs and then branches out to your feet. It allows you to feel sensations and move muscles in your legs. Inflammation or pressure from the back can make the sciatic nerve painful, resulting in sciatica. It is very important that you are assessed by your Chartered Physiotherapist as soon as possible, to determine if it is a sciatic nerve problem or PGP. You will need prompt treatment to minimise your symptoms as your pregnancy progresses.

THESE ANSWERS ARE NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR A PROPER ASSESSMENT

BY YOUR CHARTERED PHYSIOTHERAPIST. IT IS VITAL TO DEAL PROMPTLY WITH ANY ACHES AND PAINS AND THEY WILL ONLY GET WORSE AS YOUR BABY GETS BIGGER AND HEAVIER.

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QUICK GUIDE

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De Quervain’s syndrome, or “Mommy thumb,” is caused by the everyday act of repeatedly picking up your baby. ✹ Ice 4-5 times daily for 10 minutes ✹ Use pillows when feeding ✹ Wear a splint daily, especially when you are lifting the baby ✹ Ask your partner to lift the baby as much as possible ✹ Avoid thumbs cocked up into an “L” shape ✹ Try to scoop baby instead of lifting ✹ Avoid using your smart phone

Varicose veins are swollen veins that generally bulge near the surface of the skin in your legs or elsewhere. Many women first develop them in pregnancy or find they get worse. They usually improve after birth, but if they haven’t within four months, consult your GP. You can help prevent varicose veins by exercising daily, avoiding crossing your legs and not sitting or standing for long periods of time.

Dealing with…

THUMB PAIN

What are…

VARICOSE VEINS?

3

Question CAN I RUN WHEN PREGNANT? The basic rule is that you should MAINTAIN fitness in pregnancy, rather than looking to improve it. So if you were a keen runner before pregnancy, you can still run when pregnant.

Make sure you’re well hydrated when you exercise, and keep the intensity down. If you feel any twinges or signs of dizziness, stop immediately. Listen to your body at all times.

27/07/2015 10:08

84 ASK THE GP

Q

Q

Chest infection recovery

Helping eczema My seven year old has eczema and is always scratching.

What’s the best way of helping with this?

One of the bedrocks of looking after eczema is moisturising: a dry skin is an itchy skin. After bathing, apply it smoothly and gently, and give it 1520 minutes to soak in before bed. You can keep moisturiser in the fridge or a cool box, so it’s pleasant to use. Keeping cool is also important as heat makes the skin more itchy. Give your child loose clothing, avoiding wool, and make sure they have time to rest after running around or playing sports.

Children often get hot at night, so use cotton sheets and nightwear, a light duvet, and keep the room cool and air circulating by opening a window.

Soaps and bubble baths can make eczema much worse by stripping the skin of its protective oily layer. Use a cleansing product that also contains moisturiser, and keep the bath or shower cool. You can also buy bath oils designed to help eczema. You should also make sure fingernails are kept short. Many children are unaware that they are scratching, but you can help by encouraging your child to hold their arm, sit on their hands, or even try wearing gloves. Some children’s eczema is made worse by triggers, such as household pets, or some foods. If you can identify such a cause then it’s usually easy to avoid it, although you should talk to your GP to ensure your child is still getting a balanced diet.

Q Treating constipation My 11-year-old son suffers from ongoing constipation. We have tried various OTC preparations with limited success. What would you recommend?

Constipation is a common problem during childhood and bowel habits do vary; anything from three times a day to once every other day can be normal. Persistent constipation means your son may have to strain, gets tummy pain or has seen traces of blood on the toilet paper. Passing very large hard motions, which is often painful, or small hard pellets are also common. It is important to drink plenty; water should be the main drink, for example, between meals, but some fruit juice, such as apple, may have a mild laxative effect. Some cereals, such as Weetabix or Shredded Wheat, are high in fibre. Vegetables and wholemeal bread should be routinely part of family meals. Offer fresh or dried fruit and raisins as snacks. Encourage a regular toilet habit at home as many children with constipation don’t want to use school toilets. Most children with persistent constipation will need laxatives. The dose depends on the child’s age, severity of symptoms, and response to treatment. The key is to continue treatment for as long as is needed, gradually reducing the dose. Stopping abruptly may trigger another episode of constipation, which is disheartening for everyone. Talk to your GP for the best treatment for your son.

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My four-year-old son has just been prescribed a second course of antibiotics for a persistent chest infection. What can I do to ensure he makes a full recovery?

The overwhelming majority of previously healthy children make a full recovery from a chest infection. You should finish the full course of antibiotics. Don’t worry if his appetite takes a while to fully recover. Make sure he has plenty of rest; it might help to have a sleep in the day even if he doesn’t usually have one. Being unwell is no fun, whatever your age, so getting better is a good time for some extra tender loving care and a treat or two. One key risk factor for chest infections is passive exposure to smoke, so your home should be a no smoking zone. You can’t wrap your child up in a bubble and, especially at nursery or school they are going to pick up infections. This is also how we develop immunity for the future. I’d expect your son to make a complete recovery and only worry if his symptoms are persistent, or if he keeps getting repeated chest infections that are slow to settle. In this situation you would need to see your GP.

QUICK GUIDE

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2

Treating…

CONJUNCTIVITIS

What is…

TONSILLITIS?

Conjunctivitis can be either viral or bacterial; bacterial can be treated by antibiotic creams, but in both cases some home-care tips can help the condition and prevent it from spreading: ✹ Bathe the affected eye(s) several times a day using cotton wool soaked in cooled boiled water. ✹ Use disposable tissues ✹ Change your child’s pillowcase daily ✹ Make sure to use a separate towel and face cloth for your child.

Tonsillitis is an inflammation of the lymph nodes that hang down at the back of the throat. When a virus or bacteria is too strong for your tonsils to filter, it can cause them to swell.

Symptoms include: ✹ Difficulty swallowing ✹ Refusal to eat ✹ Pulling at ears ✹ Persistent sore throat ✹ Bad breath ✹ Fever and chills ✹ Enlarged glands in the neck and jaw See your doctor for a proper diagnosis as other conditions can have the same symptoms.

3

Dealing with…

BABY’S THRUSH Thrush, or a yeast infection, is very common in babies under the age of two months. Hormonal changes right after birth can trigger an overgrowth of yeast in your baby’s mouth. It resembles cottage cheese or milk curds on the sides, roof, and sometimes the tongue of a baby’s mouth; to identify it, gently rub the area with a gauzecovered finger and if it doesn’t go, it’s probably thrush. Usually thrush clears up by itself, but if your baby is particularly bothered by it, especially if it’s interfering with feeding, talk to your GP.

27/07/2015 10:08

85 ASK THE SLEEP CONSULTANT

Q

Q

No sleep routine

Early waking

My little girl is two this month. She had severe colic until she was eight months old, and still has difficulty sleeping. The earliest I can get her down at night is 10pm, with a daytime nap of 30 mins to 1 hour, max. If she falls asleep anytime before 9pm she is wide awake from 3am.

I have a 3.5 year old and a 2.5 year old, both boys, and they both sleep in the same bedroom. They go to bed about 7.30pm but the oldest one wakes anytime between 5am and 6am, comes into me and won’t go back to his bed. Sometimes he wakes up is brother! What can I do?

You can always begin to improve sleep despite a tough start with colic, so don’t lose heart! Your child is designed to sleep well, she just needs some adjustments to help make that happen. Having a late onset of sleep difficulty an often be caused by a late or irregular morning wake time, potential overuse of electronic media during the day, drinks close to bedtime and attempting bedtime when she is already overtired. To help undo the cycle I would suggest that make sure she is awake no later than 7.30am and maintain the day sleep aiming for the nap to happen close to or after 1pm, with lunch before this. Have dinner around 5pm and then begin to quiet things down.

Finish drinks and television by 6pm and prepare a bedtime routine from 6.30pm onwards. At the start it may still take her a long time to fall asleep, but gradually you should see the time reducing and getting closer to being in bed asleep sometime between 7-8pm, or thereabouts. It will take time and patience to correct this, but it is achievable and will be very beneficial for you and your child in the long run.

Waking before 6am may be considered early rising proper, waking after 6am sometimes is the natural wake time for many. Once you can rule out hunger (ensure that main meal of the day is in evening), cold, any light whatsoever along with any noise in the household, I would then turn attention to the timings and application of sleep. At 3.5 years old it is possible that he is no longer napping, and without a nap, a slightly earlier bedtime may be more appropriate. Consider mood and behaviour in the evening, if he is flagging around 5pm and hyper about 6pm then your bedtime may be too late-although it is counterintuitive an earlier bedtime can produce a later wake time.

Q

Waking when hungry I have a 17 month old who still has trouble sleeping through the night.

The problem is that she is not a good eater. She wakes part out of habit and partly out of hunger. We are now at the point that if I don’t give her milk she will get upset to the point of actually throwing up. It’s a vicious cycle as the milk in the night reduces her appetite for food in the day.

It can be a vicious cycle as you have described. Very often waking in the night for drinks is only the symptom and although hunger may well play a part, often it can be the timing and amount of day time sleep that is increasing the night-time activity. At this age, when a child is not routinely sleeping well at night, then it may be worth operating a two-nap day for a while (as in a nap before 10am for 45mins-1h and another 1h+ nap around three hours later). It may also be worth examining bedtime: if she goes down very easily at bedtime, she could be overtired. Close the gap between the final nap and bedtime to no more than four hours of wakefulness, and you can then be sure that her sleep is correctly balanced. Then you can address the night wakings. First ensure that her last feed happens at least 45 minutes before bedtime, that way you can be certain that the feed is not inducing a sleepy state and then making it hard for her to cycle through sleep without requiring more milk. Get consent from your GP that she no longer requires a night feed and you could then consider gradually reducing the amount in the night instead of diluting it, which will also give her body a chance to make up the extra calories during the day over 7-10 days of weaning.

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QUICK GUIDE

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Dealing with…

BEDWETTING Most experts consider bedwetting normal until the age of six.

Keeping dry at night is a developmental skill that your child will get in time, so the key is to be patient and avoid putting pressure on your child. While you are waiting for your child to master the skill, protect the mattress with a good cover, use cloth or disposable training pants, or encourage your child to get up as soon as they realise the bed is wet, to avoid irritation.

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Question WHEN SHOULD MY CHILD STOP NAPPING? Children stop needing a nap anytime between 2.5 and 3.5 years of age. Look out for these common signs that a nap is no longer needed: ✹ Refusing to stay in bed at naptime or not wanting to nap. ✹ Taking a long time to fall asleep ✹ Has good energy and mood throughout the day ✹ Sleeps well at night even without a nap ✹ Isn’t tired at usual bedtime after napping during the day

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What are the…

CONSEQUENCES OF POOR SLEEP? Sleep serves a huge function in keeping your child healthy. As well as supervising a variety of maintenance jobs, it helps brain and central nervous system maturation, and aids future cognition, temperament and psychomotor development. Lack of sleep in children can lead to irritability, frustration, moodiness and behavioural problems, as well as a decreased capacity for memory, attention, learning and reasoning.

27/07/2015 10:09

86 PROFESSIONAL HELP

Support & Advice Need some expert help and advice? Our directory of useful contacts will make sure you locate the right resource.

CHILDBIRTH, BREASTFEEDING & NEW MUM SUPPORT

Early Childhood Ireland,

One Family, Cherish House,

Hainault House, Belgard Square,

2 Lower Pembroke Street,

Tallaght, Dublin 24.

Dublin 2. Tel: 01 662 9212

Tel: (01) 405 7100

LoCall Info Line: 1890 662 212

HSE, Oak House, Millennium Park,

Email: info@earlychildhood.ie

Email: info@onefamily.ie

Naas, Co. Kildare. Tel: (045) 880400

Web: www.earlychildhood.ie

Web: www.onefamily.ie

DEPRESSION AND MENTAL HEALTH

OPEN – One Parent Exchange and Network, National Centre,

Cuidiú – Irish Childbirth Trust,

Aware 72 Lower Leeson Street,

Tel: (01) 814 8860

Irish Multiple Births Association,

Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Dublin 2. Tel: (01) 661 7211

Email: enquiries@oneparent.ie

LoCall Helpline: 1890 303 302

Web: www.oneparent.ie

Carmichael Centre, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Tel: (01) 872 4501

Email: info@aware.ie

Web: www.cuidiu-ict.ie

Web: www.aware.ie

LoCall: 1850 24 1850 Email: infoline1@hse.ie Web: www.hse.ie

Miscarriage Association of Ireland, Carmichael Centre, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Tel: (01) 873 5702 Email: info@miscarriage.ie Web: www.miscarriage.ie

MULTIPLE BIRTHS

7 Red Cow Lane, Smithfield, Dublin 7.

Treoir 14 Gandon House,

Tel: (01) 874 9056 Email: info@imba.ie Web: www.imba.ie

Aware conducts support group meetings across the country.

Manned by trained volunteers, their Depression Helpline is a listening service that operates Monday to Friday, 10am to 10pm. Aware also provide an email support service.

Please visit their website for more information.

Custom House Square, International Financial Services Centre, IFSC, Dublin 1.

Information and advice resource for unmarried parents

Barnardos, Christchurch Square, Dublin 8. Callsave: 1850 222 300

lalecheleagueireland.com

Post Natal Depression Ireland,

Tel: (01) 453 0355

Web: www.lalecheleagueireland.com

Administration Building, Cork University Hospital, Wilton, Co. Cork.

MISCARRIAGE AND CHILD LOSS SUPPORT

Home Birth Association of Ireland, Tel: 087 164 0847, (0906) 405267 Email: enquiries@ homebirth.ie Web: www.homebirth.ie La Leche League of Ireland, Please refer to your local telephone directory. Email: leader@

CHILDCARE SERVICES The Childcare Directory Ltd, 98 Foxrock Avenue, Foxrock, Dublin 18.

Tel: (01) 201 6000

Tel: (01) 670 0120 LoCall Info Line: 1890 252 084 Email: info@treoir.ie Web: www.treoir.ie

Support Line: (021) 492 2083

A Little Lifetime Foundation,

(Tuesdays & Thursdays, 10am to 2pm)

18 Orion Business Campus,

Email: support@pnd.ie

Rosemount Business Park,

Web: www.pnd.ie

Ballycoolin, Blanchardstown, Dublin 15.

Monthly support meetings are held on the last Tuesday of every month at Cork Maternity Hospital, Wilton, Cork.

Email: info@childcare.ie

Tel: (01) 882 9030 Email: info@alittlelifetime.ie Web: www.alittlelifetime.ie

Web: www.childcare.ie

LONE PARENTS

Childminding Ireland,

First Light- Irish Sudden Death Syndrome Association, Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street,

Tel: (01) 287 8466

Doras Buí – A Parents Alone Resource Centre B unratty Drive, Coolock, Dublin 17 Tel: (01) 848 4811

Email: info@childminding.ie

Email: info@dorasbui.ie

Web: www.childminding.ie

Web: www.dorasbui.ie

9 Bullford Business Campus, Kilcoole, Co. Wicklow.

MI Aug-Sept 2015_Contacts.indd 86

SUPPORT FOR CHILDREN AND PARENTS UNDER STRESS

Email: info@barnardos.ie Web: www.barnardos.ie Childline, 24-hour Freephone Helpline: 1800 666 666 Text: ‘TALK’ to 50101 (2pm-10pm daily) Web: www.childline.ie Parentline, Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Dublin 7. Tel: (01) 873 2711

Tel: (01) 873 3500

LoCall Helpline: 1850 391 391

LoCall: 1890 927 277

Email: support@firstlight.ie

Email: info@parentline.ie

Web: www.firstlight.ie

Web: www.parentline.ie

27/07/2015 11:30

87 PROFESSIONAL HELP

SUPPORT FOR FAMILIES WITH SPECIAL NEEDS Asthma Society of Ireland,

Enable Ireland, 32F Rosemount Park Drive, Rosemount Business Park, Ballycoolin Road, Dublin 11.

Irish Wheelchair Association,

daily) Tel: (01) 678 8858

Áras Chúchulainn, Blackheath Drive, Clontarf, Dublin 3.

Email: info@womensaid.ie

Tel: (01) 872 7155

Tel: (01) 818 6400

Email: communications@enableireland. ie Web: www.enableireland.ie

Email: admin.roc@iwa.ie

42-43 Amiens Street, Dublin 1.

Helpline: 1850 445 464 (10am-1pm, Monday-Friday)

Meningitis Research Foundation,

Advice and support for women and children experiencing domestic violence.

OTHER USEFUL INFORMATION AND ADVICE

Tel: (01) 817 8886

The Hope Project – Inclusion Ireland (Disability/Autism), St Joseph, Ballinabearna, Ballinhassig, Co. Cork.

Email: office@asthmasociety.ie

Tel: (021) 488 8503

Dublin 7. Helpline: 1800 413 344

Department of Justice and Equality,

Web: www.asthmasociety.ie

Email: hope.project@esatclear.ie

Tel: (01) 872 4120

94 St Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2.

Web: www.inclusionireland.ie

Web: www.nai.ie

Tel: (01) 602 8202

Neurological Alliance of Ireland, Coleraine House, Coleraine Street,

Lo-Call: 1890 221 227

Cleft Lip and Palate Association of Ireland, Tel: 087 131 9803

National Council for the Blind,

Email: info@justice.ie Web: www.justice.ie

Tel: (01) 860 1878

Whitworth Road, Drumcondra, Dublin 9. Tel: (01) 830 7033

Email: info@irishdeafsociety.ie

LoCall: 1850 92 3060

Maternity Benefit Section,

Web: www.irishdeafsociety.ie

Email: info@ncbi.ie

Department of Social Protection, McCarter’s Road, Ardarvan, Buncrana,

Email: info@cleft.ie

Irish Deaf Society, Deaf Village Ireland, Ratoath Road, Cabra, Dublin 7.

Web: www.cleft.ie Down Syndrome Ireland,

Web: www.ncbi.ie

Citylink Business Park, Old Naas Road, Dublin 12. T el: (01) 426 6500

Co. Donegal.

WOMEN’S NEEDS

LoCall: 1890 690 690

LoCall: 1890 374 374

The Irish Society for Autism, Unity Building, 16/17 Lower O’Connell Street, Dublin 1. Tel: (01) 874 4684

Email: info@downsyndrome.ie

Email: admin@autism.ie

Women’s Aid, 5 Wilton Place, Dublin 2.

Email: maternityben@welfare.ie

Web: www.downsyndrome.ie

Web: www.autism.ie

Helpline: 1800 341 900 (10am-10pm

Web: www.welfare.ie

Tel: (074) 916 4491

In Africa women do

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OF THE FARM WORK

OF THE HELP & SUPPORT

In Africa, the hand that rocks the cradle also tills the field. In addition to raising children, preparing food, carrying water and collecting firewood, African women do up to 80% of the farm work. But they get as little as 5% of the support in training, seeds, land and credit. You can change this. Add your name to the petition to demand increased support for African women farmers. Find out more at www.changeherlife.org

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MI Aug-Sept 2015_Contacts.indd 87

27/07/2015 11:30

88 BLOG WE LOG

NEW

BEGINNINGS

I’m SADHBH, mum to twin girls Lile and Sábha. My blog is called Where Wishes Come From, and documents celebrations and milestones in my family’s life – here I talk about a recent emotional day: Lile and Sábha’s last day of preschool.

T

oday was Lile and Sábha’s last day of preschool.

It seems like only yesterday we were celebrating their very first day. Then, we had a little party and smiled and laughed, even though I was in floods of tears for a lot of the day, after watching my babies take their first steps towards independence. That was almost two years ago. There were more tears today. Mine again, of course, as the reality hit that we would no longer be following the winding path, past the spiral maze, up to the little wooden cabin where they spent their mornings for so long.

And, as with everything there is to do with children, there were mixed emotions. We are all very sad to be leaving the gorgeous, protective bubble of love, respect and nurturing that was the Naíonra but we are excited too, to be moving on to the next stage. Lile and Sábha are more than ready to go to school and I know that the beginning they got with the Naíonra team will stand them in good stead for the rest of their lives.

I don’t think Lile and Sábha fully understand that it’s an ending. Or that it’s likely we’ll rarely see all of the people who are right now so dear to them very often again. Some we won’t see at all. They’ve left and come back so many times, you see. The twoweek breaks at Christmas or Easter are as long as forever to people who have only the most tenuous grasp of how time works. Going back after the two-month break of last summer was almost like beginning again for the first time. I know they’ll still be asking me every morning for the next few weeks

if it’s ‘a naíonra day today’... but there are no more naíonra days...

The team who looked after my girls so amazingly every day gave us a gift of a scrapbook keepsake for each of the girls.

It is filled with photographs, artwork, observations and snippets of conversations the girls had during their time with them. The books are big and heavy and must have taken hours and hours to compile. They made one for each of the children who were moving on to ‘big school’.

Looking at them makes me swoon with nostalgia.

Thinking about how much care was put into making them makes my heart get tight. Thinking about how these books are only a snapshot of the huge amount of love and care Tonya, Emma, Ger and Claire have shown my girls makes me weep.

I am so grateful to each and every staff member in the Naíonra but especially to those four. After Naíonra today a few of the parents and children gathered in the park. We gathered to prolong our connection to each other. To stave off the inevitable fracture of a routine we’ve all held dear.

To watch our carefree little ones play together for just a moment longer before they scatter to the wind, and to different schools and into unknown futures.

Come September, everything will be different.

There will be uniforms and school books, new friends to be made and new routines to establish.

It will be exciting and daunting in equal measure and ultimately it will be fine.

But, I know in my heart it’ll never match the precious days of preschool.

FOLLOW SADHBH’S PARENTING ADVENTURES ON

wherewishescomefrom.blogspot.ie If you’re a parenting blogger, we want to hear from you! Email us at editorialdesk@ashville.com

MI Aug_Sept 2015_Blog.indd 88

27/07/2015 09:04

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27/07/2015 14:24

Immunisation Immunisation Schedule Schedule for after 1st 1st July July 2015 2015 forchildren children born born on or after At At birth birth

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www.immunisation.ie www.immunisation.ie MI Aug_Sept 2015_Ad Template.indd 29 236199_1C_HSE_MI.indd 1

27/07/2015 28/05/2015 17:44 16:43