February 2010

More than Words Germantown, TN 901.755.4388 morethanwords.com

2 Danes

Nashville, TN 615.352.6085 2danes.com

J Wm. Brasfield Jewelers Covington, TN 901.476.8387 jwmbrasfield@gmail.com

Master Jewelers Olive Branch, MS 662.890.3388

James Middleton Jewelers Memphis, TN 901.755.5075 jamesmiddletonjewelers.com

Rone Regency Jewelers Chattanooga, TN 423.894.1188 roneregencyjewelers.com

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COVER PHOTOGRAPHY BY MIKE BOATMAN

contents february 2010

COVER FEATURES

50 Artful Design

24 Tennessee Shopping Guide

IT’S ALL IN THE MIX

BEST BOUTIQUES IN TENNESSEE

Staying true to her design motto, ‘It’s the mix, not the match,” Germantown interior designer Teresa Davis has taken her own home to the next level with surprising design pairings and personal accents throughout. “I’m not a designer who goes out and buys a room,” she says. “I want rooms to show the people who live there.”

Buying local has never been more fun. We’ve compiled a guide to top shopping hot spots in the state, from an upscale Chattanooga shoe boutique to Nashville shops that cater to the stars.

46 Romantic Wedding Hotels WED IN LUXURY

60 Wedding Stories

Top hotels across Tennessee offer luxurious wedding guest lodging, expert event planners and breathtaking venues— everything you need for the wedding of your dreams.

JUST MARRIED

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Whether you choose indoor, outdoor, themed or traditional, there are countless ways to celebrate the big day. Get inspired with these five fabulous affairs.

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contents february 2010 20

82

30

72

SELF 20 VERY SPECIAL VALENTINE Please that special someone with these great gifts.

30 HERE COMES THE BRIDE Before taking the plunge, pamper yourself from head to toe with the best in bridal beauty. We’ve got everything you need to look stunning on the big day.

32 FEBRUARY FITNESS Get sweaty with your sweetie during this month’s couples’ workout, learn healthy habits with our quick tips and don’t forget to spend some quality time with yourself—yoga is a great way to get in touch with your body and your mind.

34 RESOLVING TO HAVE A HEALTHY HEART As medical strides help reduce the number of heart-related deaths, many Americans are breathing a sigh of relief when they should be focusing on prevention.

Here, learn about what you can do to stay healthy in 2010.

36 BRIDAL HOT SPOTS AND MARKETPLACE

TRAVEL 38 LIVING LARGE IN THE BIG EASY There’s no place quite like New Orleans. From the cuisine and seafood to history and culture, there’s plenty to explore in the Crescent City.

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44 ATOP THE MOUNTAIN

74 ALL ABOUT ENGAGEMENT RINGS

Escape to the mountains of Highlands, North Carolina this month. The Inn at Half-Mile Farm provides the perfect tranquil setting for a romantic getaway or special event.

Get the scoop on stones from those in the know. Chuck Cooper, of Van Atkins Jewelers, shares the basics on the “Four C’s” of diamonds and recent jewelry trends.

AT HOME WITH

FOOD

48 CHOCOLATE- COVERED TRADITION Dinstuhl’s Fine Candies in Memphis has been serving quality treats to Tennesseeans since 1902. With a foundation in tradition, this family run business is always expanding and experimenting with new decadent delicacies.

82 GOURMET EVOLUTION What began as a gourmet food store in Johnson City has now expanded to include a top-notch restaurant with a seasonal menu and a new twist on Southern favorites.

84 SHOWER YOUR BRIDE AROUND THE CLOCK

HOME & GARDEN 58 DIVING INTO DESIGN When a Cleveland family was in need of a major, yet quick and affordable, kitchen redesign, interior designer Kimberly Varner was up to the task.

Party around the clock with this twist on the classic bridal shower. Time flies when you’re having fun!

IN THIS ISSUE 12 PUBLISHER’S NOTE 76 by invitation—THE SOCIAL PAGES

WEDDING ADVICE

90 FINANCE

72 FLOWER FOCUS

92 BOOK REVIEW

Learn the basics of fantastic floral arrangements and trends with expert advice from Kellie Deckard, wedding coordinator for Memphis’ Holliday Flowers.

94 HAPPENINGS 97 SOURCES 98 ESSAY

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February 2010 • Vol. 8 No. 11 PUBLISHER/EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Margaret Monger - mmonger@athometn.com

EDITORIAL CREATIVE DIRECTOR Nikki Aviotti - naviotti@athometn.com MANAGING EDITOR Lindsey Phillips - lphillips@athometn.com SOCIETY EDITOR Lesley Colvett - lcolvett@athometn.com EDITORIAL CONTRIBUTORS Terri Glazer, Andrew Abernathy, C. Elise Dillingham, Jillen Fry, Merrell McGinness CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Mike Boatman COLOR MANAGEMENT Charles Reynolds - cr@colorretouching.com INTERNS Lauren McDermott and Katja Zurcher

ADVERTISING ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Virginia Davis - vdavis@athometn.com Hilary Frankel - hfrankel@athometn.com Amy Garland - agarland@athometn.com Bob Irwin - birwin@athometn.com Valerie Lindley - vlindley@athometn.com Rachel Twiford - rtwiford@athometn.com Scharlene White - swhite@athometn.com REGIONAL SALES Melissa Hosp - mhosp@athometn.com

BUSINESS DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS Trip Monger - tmonger@athometn.com ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT Ginger Goforth - ggoforth@athometn.com

HOW TO REACH US 671 N. Ericson Rd., Suite 200, Cordova, TN 38018 KNOXVILLE 865.686.5271, FAX 865.354.4886 MEMPHIS 901.684.4155, FAX 901.684.4156 NASHVILLE 615.469.1504, FAX 615.469.5991 TOLL FREE 877.684.4155, FAX 866.354.4886 WEBSITE athometn.com BEAUTY INQUIRIES beauty@athometn.com WEBSITE INQUIRIES web@athometn.com At Home Tennessee does not accept unsolicited manuscripts. To inquire about freelance opportunities, send a letter, resume and three writing samples to - Lindsey Phillips, Associate Editor, At Home Tennessee; 671 N. Ericson Rd., Suite 200, Cordova, TN 38018.

SUBSCRIPTION SERVICE Call 877.684.4155 or subscribe online at athometn.com.

Annual subscription rate: $19.95. Single copy price: $4.99.

At Home Tennessee is published 12 times a year. Postmaster: Send address changes to At Home Tennessee; 671 N. Ericson Rd., Suite 200, Cordova, TN 38018. We make every effort to correct factual mistakes or omissions in a timely and candid manner. Information can be forwarded to Lindsey Phillips; At Home Tennessee; 671 N. Ericson Rd., Suite 200, Cordova, TN 38018 or by e-mail to lphillips@athometn.com.

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publisher’s note

Love is in the Air Besides its frigid temperatures, February is known as the month of love. I found a few interesting Valentine’s Day facts the other day. Did you know the tradition of celebrating St. Valentine’s Day goes back to around A.D. 498 when Pope Gelasius declared February 14 a day to celebrate love in honor of St. Valentine? Americans began exchanging handmade valentines in the early 1700s and the oldest known valentine is on display at a British museum. I was not surprised to find that 85 percent of all valentine cards are purchased my women!

Romantic as it is, it is no wonder that February is full of engagements and weddings. This year in particular my husband and his siblings have the rare honor of witnessing their parents celebrate 50 years of marriage.

While planning the celebration, we decided to put together a video of their life together. It really is overwhelming to go through 50 years of photos and try of narrow it down to fit into a 20 minute video. That is 50 years of Christmases and family vacations. Pictures of babies being born, their first days of school, high school and college graduations and marriages of their own that eventually brought grandchildren into the photos. What’s more amazing is how the circle of life continues as they watch their six grandchildren grow and now range in age from a sophomore in college to a middle school student.

In this issue, we feature five wedding of couples across the state. Although they are just starting their journey together, the time will fly by much quicker than they think and I hope they are fortunate to celebrate their 50 wonderful years together one day. We wish them all the best as they begin their life together. Congratulations to Lindsey and Nikki, in our office, as they plan their weddings this year to fiances Andrew and Charlie. There is no doubt they will make beautiful brides and we wish nothing but happiness in their future. To my mother and father–in-law, Ralph and Peggy Monger, thanks for the inspiring 50 years you have celebrated together and we look forward to many more happy years to come.

Happy Valentine’s Day and congratulations to our new brides, our bridesto-be and everyone celebrating wedding anniversaries! Best wishes to you all.

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www.haljaffe.com

contributors’ page

Lesley Harris Colvett

is pleased to rejoin At Home Tennessee magazine. Her 10year career in magazines began promptly after graduating from the University of Missouri – Columbia School of Journalism as editor of RSVP magazine, where she covered countless parties in Memphis. She then joined At Home Tennessee as an account executive. After having two children, Lesley was back as editor of VIP Memphis magazine. Most recently, she was one of the founders of by invitation Kansas City, a social magazine in Kansas City. Lesley is proud to bring social pages to Tennessee!

Kristen Waddell is a senior associate at Howell Marketing Strategies, a boutique PR firm in Memphis. Kristen received her B.A. from the University of Arkansas with a double major in sociology and criminal justice. She is a member of the Public Relations Society of America, MPACT and ArtsMemphis’ Bravo program. She is a recent graduate of the Leadership Memphis Fast Track program and is a volunteer for Hands on Memphis.

Marty Marbry

is West Tennessee Regional Manager for the Tennessee Department of Tourist Development, a position she has held since 2005. She works with 21 counties developing tourism opportunities, creating and implementing strategic marketing plans and working with local, regional and national media to inform about the importance of tourism to the local and state economies. She also serves as the department liaison. Prior to joining the state, Marty spent nearly 10 years in retail-tourism as marketing/tourism director for Wolfchase Galleria.

Becky Fox is a certified personal trainer, nutrition consultant and owner of the Knoxville-based personal training and boot camp company, Fox Fitness. Becky enjoys helping individuals lose fat and tone their bodies through fun, efficient and challenging workouts. She has also written for various publications including the Knoxville News Sentinel. Becky is an Optimum Nutrition sponsored fitness model who can be seen on the covers of Power Systems and Magazine Blu. You can learn more about Becky by visiting her sites at foxfitness.com or womenathomeworkout.com.

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PHOTOS courtesy of dreamstime.com

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self

Very Special Valentine These great gifts are sure to please this Valentine’s Day.

Carleon Bangles available at James Middleton Jewelers Memphis, TN 901.755.5075 jamesmiddletonjewelers.com Emily Ray Necklace available at Merle Norman Cosmetics Ripley, TN 731.635.4168

Rock and Republic maternity jeans, available exclusively at Haute Mama Maternity Germantown, TN hautemamamaternity.com

1900s platinum estate ring available at Van Atkins Jewelers New Albany, MS 1.866.vanatkins vanatkins.com

Linneas’s Lights Soy Candles available exclusively at Menage Fine Stationary and Gifts Memphis, TN 901.683.6809 20 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

Lundstrom Dress available at Le Chic Boutique Covington, TN 901.475.1530

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Frankie and Julian’s

Le Chic Boutique

Mam’selle

JAMIE

At Home Tennessee’s Guide to

The Best Boutiques in Tennessee From great denim to plastic— yet undeniably stylish—shoes, boutiques across Tennessee have a lot to offer. Here, At Home Tennessee highlights some of the top shopping locales in the state, so grab your reusable shopping bag and prepare for an upscale experience.

Lola B.

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self touches. This contemporary store carries lines such as Rebecca Taylor, Nanette Lepore, Vince, Diane von Furstenburg, Citizens and Seven. 400 Main Street, Suite 130, Franklin, 615.791.6205, emmalineboutique.com

Frankie and Julian’s This

Gin-O Embellish Shoes Having sold Carlisle clothing for almost 15 years, store owner Terri Holley found it increasingly difficult to find the right shoes to coordinate with apparel. That difficulty inspired the opening of this shoe store, which specializes in brands and styles not otherwise offered in Chattanooga or nearby areas. Embellish Shoes carries lines such as Donald Pliner, Stuart Weitzman, Kate Spade, Tory Burch, Cordani, Cole Haan and Kors. The store’s atmosphere is described as classically elegant yet warm and comfortable with a contemporary flair. With great focus on customer service, Embellish Shoes provides for the mother and daughter, grandmother and granddaughter and everyone in between. 1110 Market Street, Chattanooga, 423.752.7463, embellishshoes.com

Emmaline’s Tucked away in the quaint town of Franklin is Emmaline’s, a stylish boutique that caters to a savvy group of women. Abby Palmer introduced Emmaline’s two years ago, designing her boutique with a fresh, modern feel featuring white walls, comfy wingback chairs and vintage trunks and accented with industrial 24 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

upscale boutique owned by Suzanne Bishop has been outfitting the fashionable of Chattanooga for five years.

Designed to feel like a giant walk-in closet, Frankie and Julian’s is a cozy and inviting store with a large variety of styles and sizes. Clients encompass all ages, and some of the lines the shop carries include 515 America, Coom, Lilla P, William Rast, Corey Lynn Calter and Poleci. 330 Frazier Avenue, Chattanooga, 423.266.6661

Gin-O Boutique Gin-O is located in Franklin’s historic downtown. Owner Ginger Wilder specializes in styles for both men and women with lines such as Genetic Denim, AG Denim, Flying Tomato and Ben Sherman, to name a few.

This boutique is sandwiched between two restaurants with entrances into the store from both. Customers can embrace reasonable price points, the character of downtown Franklin and a cup of coffee or glass of wine. 118 Fourth Avenue South, Franklin, 615.591.8451, ginoboutique.com.

H. Audrey Located in the distinguished Green Hills neighborhood in Nashville, Holly Williams (daughter of the famous Hank Williams, Jr. and granddaughter of Hank

Williams) opened H. Audrey, a boutique specialized in selling “classics with an edge,” in fall 2007. The store carries several prominent lines such as Rick Owens, Golden Goose, Elizabeth and James, Loeffler Randall, Hanni Y and Helmut Lang. With an interior design described as “rock ‘n roll meets French provincial,” the store attracts customers from all across the board, selling necklaces to Taylor Swift and jeans and cashmere turtlenecks to grandmothers. From teenage girls to mature women, H. Audrey is sure to provide a little something for everyone.

4027 Hillsboro Pike, Suite 703, Nashville, 615.760.5701, haudrey.com

JAMIE For more than 38 years, store owner Jamie Stream has offered one of the only specialty stores in Nashville that represents such a large number of designers. Providing for everyone’s wants and needs, JAMIE supplies its customers with clothing, shoes, accessories, cosmetics and even facial and spa treatments. Carrying lines such as MARNI, Lanvin, Vera Wang, Carolina Herrera, Oscar de La Renta, Milly and Tory Burch, the store’s general atmosphere is soft and cozy with a mix of contemporary art and antiques. JAMIE caters to all age groups with various price ranges for merchandise, while also providing a full array of services including personal shopping, alterations and home deliveries. 4317 Harding Road, Nashville, 615.292.4188, jamie-nashville.com

Le Chic Boutique Focused

self on providing the customer with apparel and accessories that create the look and image women want to convey in the workplace, in the community and on special occasions, store owner Debbie Gordon supplies many different options for shoppers from all walks of life. With its upscale eclectic and contemporary look, Le Chic Boutique attracts shoppers ranging from glass blowing artists to politicians. The store carries numerous lines like Brighton, Alexander J. Jansen, Joseph Ribkoff, Karen Kane and Nic & Zoe, offering a wide array of styles. In addition to its apparel and accessories, Le Chic Boutique also provides alterations, personal shoppers and wardrobe consulting services for its customers.

East Court Square, Covington, 901.475.1530, le-chic-boutique.com

Lola B. When owner Deena Sukenik opened this Knoxville boutique, she did it because she loved fashion and wanted to offer customers a comfortable, inviting shopping experience. Four and a half years later it’s obvious that she has accomplished her goal—the store, specializing in high quality women’s fashions, appeals to all ages with lines like Robert Rodriguez, Hale Bob, Diane von Furstenburg, Chip and Pepper and Rebecca Taylor.

Stop in this warm shop for a pair of Tory Burch shoes to accent the perfect piece of Red Engine denim. 6614 Kingston Pike, Knoxville, 865.909.9059 shoplolab.com

Mam’selle Dedicated to selling real clothes for real women, owner Debbie Swacker outfits her clients from head to toe, from foundations to outerwear, with February 2010 • athometn.com | 25

clothing, footwear, jewelry and other accessories. Swacker describes her store as a place where “regular” women love to help other “regular” women feel good about themselves by developing caring and trusting relationships with their clients. Carrying lines such as Marc by Marc Jacobs, BCBG Max Azria, Michael Stars, Diane von Furstenburg, Not Your Daughter’s Jeans and Hudson Jeans, Mam’selle offers a comfortably chic atmosphere that attracts a clientele spanning generations of fashion-conscious shoppers.

907 D Vann Drive, Jackson, 731.668.2420

Obligato

Oak Hall Oak Hall opened in downtown Memphis in 1859.

Throughout its 150-year history and five generations of leadership, the store has relocated twice and undergone a remodeling and expansion project that was completed in 2006. Now one of the oldest family-owned stores in Memphis, Oak Hall prides itself on bringing men and women’s apparel from around the world to the United States. Designers include Hugo Boss, St. John and Burberry among many others. Oak Hall offers personal shoppers and shopping by appointment, allowing you to enjoy shopping even while balancing a tight schedule. 6150 Poplar Ave, Suite 146, Memphis, 901.761.3580, oakhall.com

Obligato With cutting-edge fashions that provide a mix of comfy casual and fashion forward, store owners Julie Beeler and Margot Elstein offer a unique shopping experience. Located in East Hampton, New York, for more than 20 years and brought to Knoxville in 2005, Obligato carries lines such as Free People, Alice & Olivia, 26 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

Ella Moss, BCBG, Splendid and Saints & Angels. With its contemporary atmosphere, the boutique provides fashionable clothing for both mothers and daughters with personal shoppers to help their clientele along the way. 4626 Kingston Pike Southwest, Knoxville, 865.558.0822

Pappagallo This boutique has been a shopping tradition in Memphis for more than 25 years.

Purchased in 1988 by Dana Driver and Cheryl Walker, Pappagallo has evolved from a conservative name into a contemporary style. Featuring lines such as Johnny Was, Hale Bob, Debbie Segal, Baily 44 and David Kahn, the store welcomes its clientele with a staff they can trust in a homey atmosphere they have grown to love. 4615 Poplar Avenue, Memphis, 901.761.4430

Penny’s Closet in Murfreesboro embodies its slogan, “Where fashion is fun.” In business for more than 12 years, owner Penny Bolton creates a friendly environment that sets a standard of excellent customer service. Offering a variety

self of apparel, shoes and accessories, Penny’s Closet carries lines such as Brighton, Virgins, Saints and Angels, Crislu, JWLA, Salt of the Earth, Volatile and many more.

Georgetown Park, 16902 West Northfield Boulevard, Mufreesboro, 615.890.0415, pennyscloset.com

Seriously Fun Apparel is a quaint boutique in Germantown where customers find a casual, comfortable atmosphere featuring bamboo and overstuffed chairs and a warm, friendly greeting from owner Betty Hays. Betty not only finds lines exclusive to her store, she pays attention to her community in giving back to various charitable organizations. Betty also carries a line of footwear called Melissa Plastic Dreams shoes, exclusive to Seriously Fun in the Memphis area. Other lines available are Silk Culture, XCVI, Mycro-Pac, Sandy Duftler belts, Hudson jeans, Arianne and more.

7859 Farmington Boulevard, Germantown, 901.754.0018

Simply Panache Resting at the foot of the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in the historic Vance Building of Dandridge, Simply Panache offers its customers a shopping atmosphere similar to the environment that surrounds it. A combination of wood floors, high ceilings, custom raw steel displays, exposed brick and antique ductwork with glistening chandeliers characterizes the destination boutique.

Simply Panache carries desirable lines including Not Your Daughter’s Jeans, Brighton Jewelry and Charms, Weston Wear, Mechant and Alison Sheri. By constantly listening to its clientele and researching new lines, February 2010 • athometn.com | 27

the store easily attracts shoppers both young and old, varying from college students to retirees from the area. Simply Panache was recently named the number one women’s clothing store in The Newport Plain Talk’s 2009-2010 People’s Choice Awards. 1237 Gay Street, Dandridge, 865.397.0080 simplypanachefashions.com

Posh Kathy Hadley is the owner of Posh, boutiques that cater to both men and women. Kathy uses her interior design experience to give each location its own look and feel.

After buying in both New York and Atlanta, Kathy fills the store with unique lines such as Dolce Vita, Cooper by Courtney, MM Coutoure, JBrand, Frye, House of Harlow, Black Halo, William Rast and many more. 4027 Hillsboro Pike, Nashville, 615.269.6250; 1801 21st Avenue South, Nashville, 615.383.9840; 131 Franklin Street, Clarksville, 931.905.1500, poshonline.net

Southern Couture Brandee Loving is the owner of Southern Couture, a Memphis based specialty boutique that is known for having a great selection of cocktail and casual dresses. However, the shop also offers shoes, jewelry, pottery and various items from lines such as Tibi, 12th Street by Cynthia Vincent, Free People, Ella Moss, Splendid and many more. Brandee opened Southern Couture, formerly known as Wink, in 2007. The decor is welcoming with antique tables, vintage doors used for displays and a friendly greeting when you walk through the door. 6150 Poplar Avenue, Suite 131, Memphis, 901.682.1128.

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For the Guys Baer’s Den

Baer’s Den Owner Jeremy Baer introduced this cozy shop to Memphis three years ago. A cedar bar and copper countertops all contribute to the den-like atmosphere of this men’s clothing store. Baer’s Den carries lines such as True Religion, William Rast, Hugo Boss, Robert Graham and many more that reflect the top in men’s fashions. 400 Perkins Extended, Memphis, 901.684.6001, thebaersden.com Coachman Clothiers With a commitment to selling the finest Southern men’s clothing, shoes and accessories available, Coachman Clothiers offers exclusive brands only available in Knoxville. Some lines include Jack Victor, Masik Collegiate Fragrances, St. Croix, Southern Proper, Southwick and Royal Highnies. Located on the historic Franklin Square in west Knoxville, the store caters to both college students and professionals. Coachman Clothiers prides itself for its customer service and offers lifetime alterations for any garment purchased in the store. 9700 Kingston Pike, Knoxville, 865.690.5805, coachmanclothiers.com February 2010 • athometn.com | 29

self

Here Comes the Bride Hampton Sun Sunless Tanning Gel hamptonsuncare.com

Korres Face Primer korresusa.com

Clinique Long Last Soft Matte Lipstick in “golden brandy” clinique.com

Whether you’re a traditional bride or planning a destination wedding, there’s one thing we all have in common—brides want to look their best on the big day! This means two things: preparation beforehand and planning your look for your walk down the aisle. Start your regimen early for blemish-free skin.

Don’t want a fake bake? Try a sunless tanning gel for a warm glow. You don’t want your wedding look to be too bright or sultry—stick with simple, natural colors. Don’t forget to protect yourself from potential tears of joy by wearing a waterproof mascara. And one final word of advice—always do your plucking and waxing at least three days before the big day to avoid redness. TEXT Nikki Aviotti

Estee Lauder Sumptuous Waterproof Mascara in black esteelauder.com

Benefit’s Boo Boo Zap benefitcosmetics.com

OPI Polish in Catching the Garter opi.com 30 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

philosophy “Tying the Knot” Bride-to-Be Gift Set philosophy.com

self

February Fitness This month, get fit with your sweetie or go for a solo workout on the yoga mat. Add these exercises to our nutrition tips and you’re well on your way to a healthy 2010!

Working it out Together

Yoga and You

What a great time of year to start working out with your partner. Follow these exercises for a great workout with your sweetie. If you’re single, no worries, just grab a friend for the same great benefits! Each exercise can be performed 12 to 16 times. Start with one set and work your way up to three.

Be yourself

TEXT Becky Fox | PHOTOGRAPHY H.E. Images | MODELS Becky Fox, Buddy Arnold

You don’t have to be in good shape, thin or flexible to start practicing yoga, says David Morgan of New Moon Yoga in Knoxville.

Yoga not only tones and stretches the body, but also helps with weight loss, stress relief, endurance, immunity and balance.

Standing Medicine Ball Twist Works: Abs, Obliques Stand one to two feet from your partner facing opposite directions holding a four to eight pound medicine ball with feet hip-width apart. While keeping your abs contracted, body upright and knees slightly bent, twist to your right, and hand the ball off to your partner, who will be twisting to his left. Your partner will then twist to his right while you twist to your left to receive the ball. Continue in the same direction for a complete set and the switch so you are twisting the opposite direction.

Go to class Beginners should take classes to learn the basics of safety and alignment as well as develop an idea of how to get the most out of practice for their own bodies, David says. After that, practitioners can start doing online yoga or using DVDs and CDs. Traditionally, yoga was taught in a one-on-one environment with a “guru” (which literally means “dispeller of darkness”) and seeking this kind of practice is still beneficial. “Yoga is not one-size-fits-all, and a good teacher will show you how to get the most out of your practice based on your body type, strengths and weaknesses, personality and particular needs,” David says.

Discover your style

Lateral Raise

There are tons of yoga styles, but David says almost all forms of yoga in the U.S. are hatha, a type of yoga “concerned with purifying and strengthening the physical body to prepare for spiritual awakening.” It’s up to you to decide which style is right for your body. Specialized classes may be structured for weight loss, pregnancy, beginners and other specific needs.

Works: Shoulders Start by standing in front of your partner with feet hip-width apart and knees slightly bent.

Hold your arms at your side at a 90 degree angle. Have your partner manually resist on the elbows as you lift your arms up so they are parallel to the floor.

Repeat for a full set then switch spots.

Strip the stress Yoga practitioners enjoy a relaxation response instead of an adrenaline rush in part due to the long, slow breathing and internal focus that accompany the poses. “A student of mine lost 30 pounds in one year simply by attending a gentle yoga class weekly with no other lifestyle changes,” David says. “The stress reduction alone helped her lose the pounds. When you’re stressed you produce cortisol, which causes weight gain.”

Daily dose In all but the most vigorous forms, you can practice yoga every day, though different styles may require you rest on different days—for example, when practicing the Ashtanga style, you take Saturdays off as well as full moon and new moon days “when tradition states you are more accident prone,” David explains. Meditation and relaxation can be practiced at any time, however. The length of a yoga session also depends on you. Forty-five minutes to an hour is good for beginners while more experienced students can perform poses for as long as two hours.

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Single Leg Squat Works: Butt, Legs, Abs Stand facing your partner so you are about two feet apart. Grab each other’s wrists for support and lift opposite legs off the ground. Slowly lower into a single-legged squat. Return to start and complete all reps on one leg; switch legs.

Healthy Habits

self

Let this be the year that you reach your resolution to lose weight and keep it off for a happier, healthier you. If you haven’t already started, what better time to get healthy than February, American Heart Month? Here, Ty Bushart, area director of the Diet Center in Memphis, shares some of the best tips to help experience weight loss with lasting results.

Hydrate Drink at least 64 ounces of water daily. As you are losing weight, staying hydrated will help cleanse your system and flush the fat.

Don’t skip meals Breakfast is the most important meal, as it sets your metabolism for the journey of the day, resulting in successful weight loss!

Be accountable Resolve to lose weight with a friend, family member or co-worker and boost your results by up to 30 percent.

Hand hygiene “Clients that excuse themselves from the table and wash their hands immediately after their last bite while in restaurants tend not to return to their plate or the breadbasket for nibbles,” Bushart says.

Smart snacking Eat foods higher in fiber and keep easy grab-and-go, proteinpacked items on hand like cheese, eggs and fresh veggies.

Write it down Recording your daily food intake will help spotlight any areas for improvement and will also ensure adequate caloric levels are maintained while dieting.

Avoid empty calories Sodas, peppermints and bread with dinner can add up quickly and also spike blood sugar that will create cravings later.

Brushing after the last bite “One of the best tips our clients find is actually brushing their teeth after their last bite,” Bushart says. “Not only does this keep the dentist happy, but it helps to keep clients out of second helpings or dessert.”

To support the Heart Truth Campaign, Diet Center is donating 20 percent of enrollment fees to the American Heart Association in February.

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self

Resolving to Have a Healthy Heart With Tennessee having one of the highest rates of cardiovascular deaths in the country, it’s time for residents to take action.

Prevention is key, so get started today. TEXT Merrell McGinness | PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of dreamstime.com

I

f one of your New Year’s resolutions was to lose weight, exercise or stop smoking, then pat yourself on the back.

These are all steps in the right direction to preventing coronary artery disease– the most common cardiovascular killer for Americans. If, however, after six months you find that you’ve stuck to any of these resolutions, you’d be in the minority. Although we’ve known for decades how to lessen our risk for cardiovascular disease, a large part of the U.S. population chooses to ignore the advice.

“Unfortunately, regular aerobic activity for middle-aged people is uncommon,” says Dr. Howard Walpole, Jr., M.D., chief of Cardiac Sciences at Saint Thomas Health Services and president of the American Heart Association Board of Directors for Greater Nashville.

However, in the past decade the incidence of dying from coronary artery disease has dropped 40 percent– a phenomenal statistic for just 10 years. No other chronic disease such as cancer or lung disease has seen such a dramatic decrease, says Walpole. One possible reason for the plunge is the concentrated effort to streamline the process in emergency departments for treating patients with chest pains or other symptoms.

The national goal is 90 minutes from

34 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

the time the patient comes through the door to when a balloon angioplasty opens the narrowed or blocked artery – referred to as “door to balloon time.”

This number is improving across Tennessee, with many large hospitals achieving times as low as 60 minutes, says Walpole. Research shows that the chance of surviving a heart attack is 97 percent if treated within one to two hours of the onset of symptoms.

Still, before you breathe a sigh of relief, understand that while death rates are dropping, the burden of disease remains high according to Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association (AHA). So while outcomes are improving, the real goal should be preventing people from lying on the hospital gurney in the first place. And that is exactly where we fall short.

“While doctors and researchers understand the disease so much better and have vastly improved the methods for treatment, a large part of the population does not follow the prevention guidelines,” says Walpole.

According to the latest AHA statistics, approximately 33 percent of U.S. adults over the age of 20 have hypertension, 16 percent have high cholesterol and nearly eight percent have diabetes. What’s far more startling is that 66 percent of Americans are

overweight or obese, which leads to the development of these risk factors. And while there are a plethora of anti-smoking campaigns, 23 percent of men and 18 percent of women continue to light up. But if these nationwide statistics seem daunting, consider that Tennessee has one of the highest death rates from cardiovascular disease in the country, ranked 45 out of 52, including Puerto Rico and the District of Columbia.

So what can you do? The prevention guidelines from the AHA are probably not foreign concepts: follow a healthy diet that’s low in fat, salt and cholesterol; maintain a healthy body weight; lead an active lifestyle; abstain from tobacco use, especially smoking; and keep tabs on your blood pressure, cholesterol and blood sugar. If you’d like to know exactly where you stand on these metrics, AHA offers a free tool called “My Life Check” on its website (mylifecheck.heart.org). It allows you to sign in, make a resolution, then assess your current heart health. It also provides a personal heart score and a life plan that recommends where and how you can improve.

“Research has shown if a 50-year-old person follows all seven metrics, their likelihood for survival for another 40 years is high (not taking genetics into account),” says Walpole.

self

10 Ways to Improve Your Heart Health in 2010: 1. Turn off the TV A recent study in Circulation: A Journal of American Heart Association reported that those who watched more than four hours of television a day had an 80 percent increased risk for cardiovascular diseaserelated death as compared with people who watched less than two hours per day.

2. Eat at least four-and-a-half cups of fruit and vegetables per day.

3. Monitor your blood sugar Ideally, your fasting blood glucose should be less than 100 mg/ dL. 4. Aim for a minimum of twoand-a-half hours of moderate exercise per week 5. Monitor your cholesterol The ideal cholesterol for an adult is less than 200 mg/dL. 6. Kick the habit The AHA reported a 17 percent drop in heart attacks one year after communities passed smoking bans compared with those who had no bans.

7. Maintain a body mass index of less than 25.

8. Limit salt The Center for Disease Control recently reported that almost every adult in the United States will develop high blood pressure in their lifetime.

Limit your daily intake to 1,500 mg by eliminating as much processed food as possible, or choose the low-sodium option.

9. Eat two or more 3.5-ounce servings of fish per week (preferably oily fish such as salmon or mackerel) 10. Monitor your blood pressure Aim for a reading of less than 120/80 mm Hg. February 2010 • athometn.com | 35

Bridal Hot Spots

214 East Mountcastle, Suite J Johnson City, TN 37604 423.929.9007, gourmetandcompany.com

100 W. Bankhead St. New Albany, MS 1.866.vanatkins vanatkins.com

5131 Wheelis Drive Memphis, TN 38117 901.685.8266 studiolaruesalon.com

870.734.3244 lowsbridal.com 36 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

335 Main St. Franklin, TN 615.595.2323 theregistryfranklin.com

2104 Crestmore Rd. Nashville, TN 615.269.3071 colorathome.com

3670 Houston Levee Collierville, TN 901.850.0892 shopbellavita.com

901.682.3737 gouldsalons.com

February 2010 • athometn.com | 37

travel

Living Large in the Big Easy With a rich history and unique culinary style, New Orleans is packed with culture, entertainment and famous eateries. And with Mardi Gras just around the corner, what better time to visit the Crescent City?

TEXT Lauren McDermott and Katja Zurcher | PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of New Orleans CVB, Hotel Monteleone

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colorful past, culture and architectural style combine in New Orleans, making it the perfect escape from everyday life. Enjoy luxurious hotels, good food and great shopping and be sure to remember that there’s history around every corner in the Big Easy.

Where to Stay Hotel Monteleone A prime display of elegance and sophistication, the lavish Hotel Monteleone (hotelmonteleone.com) serves as the perfect departure point to all of downtown New Orleans, that is, if you can bring yourself to leave the hotel. Founded in 1886, the Monteleone is a member of the Historic Hotels of America and is also the home of two award-winning restaurants, the Hunt Room Grill and Le Café. The Carousel Bar, perhaps recognizable from the writings of Hemingway, was voted number one hotel bar by readers of Gambit Weekly. Offering a full day spa, business center, heated rooftop pool and state-ofthe-art fitness facility, the Hotel Monteleone is one of the premiere hotels of New Orleans. Make sure your entire family has the opportunity to be pampered, as the Monteleone is pet-friendly.

The Cornstalk Hotel If you are looking for a more intimate atmosphere of luxury, reserve a room at the Cornstalk Hotel (cornstalkhotel.

38 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

com). Once an early 1800s-era home, the Cornstalk Hotel is newly renovated and features antique furniture, fireplaces and vaulted ceilings. Other charms include a gated courtyard and a balcony patio. The hotel’s former guests include numerous movie stars, a U.S. president and Harriet Beecher Stowe, who allegedly was inspired to write Uncle Tom’s Cabin during her stay. Along with its rich history and plantation-home atmosphere, the Cornstalk Hotel is located in the hub of the French Quarter only one block from Bourbon Street and central to many famous restaurants, entertainment and shopping.

Royal Sonesta Located in the heart of the French Quarter, the Royal Sonesta (sonesta.com) hotel is walking distance from almost anywhere you want to go in New Orleans.

Special features include a babysitting service, an outdoor pool located in the hotel courtyard, spa services and a fitness center. What distinguishes the Royal Sonesta is an atmosphere of originality.

For example, the Sonesta Art Collection is one of the first corporate hotel programs committed to displaying original art by nationally and internationally acclaimed artists. The hotel displays more than 7,000 sculptures, paintings, original prints and tapestries throughout the building. The hotel restaurant, Begue’s, is one of the only Four Diamond restaurants in the city of New Orleans, offering Creole/French cuisine and a Sunday champagne brunch.

Along with superior dinning, the Royal Sonesta is home to Irvin Mayfield’s Jazz Playhouse. The jazz club features nightly performances, hosting artists such as Neal Caine and Johnaye Kendrick.

Where to Play Riverboat Cruises What better way to enjoy the Mississippi River and escape the heat of the day than floating down the river in a New Orleans riverboat? The New Orleans Steamboat Company (steamboatnatchez. com) offers daily cruises, giving you a truly unique view of the city. There are a variety of cruises such as the dinner and jazz cruise which includes a bar, buffet dinner and jazz band entertainment. The harbor cruise is a two-hour day cruise complete with live narration of historical facts and highlights of one of the world’s most active ports. Enjoy an optional Creole lunch with New Orleans classics such as jambalaya and French bread. The riverboats even host special event cruises, such as a dinner and dance Valentine’s Day excursion.

New Orleans Zoo and Aquarium The New Orleans Zoo, Audubon Nature Institute, (auduboninstitute.org) is among the nation’s top-rated facilities, consisting of nine museums and parks.

The zoo features educational programs such as Audubon’s Dinosaur Adventure and hands-on animal encounters. Be sure to visit the natural habitat exhibits like

February 2010 • athometn.com |39

travel the award-winning Louisiana Swamp and Jaguar Jungle. One of the zoo’s many parks, the Audubon Aquarium of the Americas is located adjacent to the French Quarter and is the perfect place to spend an afternoon with the family. Not only can visitors feed the stingrays, but they can also walk through an underwater tunnel to view the Caribbean reef. The Gulf of Mexico exhibit is the aquarium’s largest, at 17 feet deep and holding 400,000 gallons of salt water. The exhibit showcases stingrays, sharks, a school of blue runner, a sea turtle and other undersea life. After a long day of exploring, grab a bite to eat at one of the zoo’s eateries, such as the new Zoofari Café of the Cypress Knee Café.

Ghost Tours Haunted History Ghost Tours (hauntedhistorytours.com) are a thrilling must-do on any trip to New Orleans. The New Orleans Ghost Tour of the old French Quarter visits sites of documented hauntings and residences where frightening events took place. Wander the dark streets of the French Quarter with your guide and stay on the lookout for eerie New Orleans’ specters.

The Cemetery History tour is a daytime walking tour into the St. Louis Cemetery # 1, the oldest cemetery in the city. Historically accurate and educational, this tour merges the history of the French Quarter with that of the St. Louis Cemetery and New Orleans Voodoo Queen Marie Laveau. The New Orleans’ Vampire Tour leads you on a journey through the city’s dark history.

As you hear the tales of New Orleans’ famous vampires, you will visit sights and locations associated with the nightly visitors, including a noted vampire tavern.

French Market The New Orleans French Market (frenchmarket.org) has existed on the same site since 1791 and began as a Native American trading post. It is now America’s oldest public market and plays a leading role in the local economy. As far as shopping is concerned, the French Market has everything from its famous Community Flea Market to candy shops, boutiques and craft stores. If you work up an appetite with all of your shopping, this “gumbo” of culture and tradition sells many restaurants featuring authentic New Orleans cuisine. You can also visit the farmers market, which offers locally sourced fruits, vegetables and other related items. The market also features music and events such as weekend concerts, carnivals and Mardi Gras festivities.

The New Orleans School of Cooking Located in the heart of the French Quarter, The New Orleans School of Cooking (neworleansschoolofcooking.com) offers a true Southern cooking experience you won’t forget. The school’s Creole and Cajun chefs teach visitors how to make classic New Orleans recipes such as jambalaya, pralines and mouthwatering gumbo in a fun and vibrant environment. Open since 1980, The New Orleans School of Cooking has exposed visitors from all around the world to the renowned Louisiana food and flavors.

Classes are taught by local Creole and Cajun experts who offer a wide array of tips to perfect the art of New Orleans cuisine. Not only do visitors get to enjoy the food, but they are able to walk away knowing how to master the classic recipes and forever enjoy sharing them with both friends and family. Classes are held seven days a week in the renovated molasses warehouse and accommodate hands-on instruction, large groups and special events. Definitely an attraction you don’t want to miss!

travel Where to Eat Acme Oyster House For more than 90 years, the famous Acme Oyster House (acmeoyster.com) has provided its customers with the freshest seafood from Louisiana waters and a distinctive dining experience with local New Orleans charm. The menu offers a wide variety of classic Creole favorites, such as its world-famous raw oysters prepared in the matchless Louisiana style. The Acme Oyster House provides a fun environment with fabulous food that is sure to please every seafood lover. Located between Bourbon and Royal, Acme’s setting is the ideal location to enjoy some of the best food that New Orleans has to offer. Be sure to stop by and enjoy the cuisine that both the locals and visitors alike all rave about!

Mother’s Known for the “World’s Best Baked Ham,” Mother’s (mothersrestaurant.net) has been a New Orleans favorite since the 1930s. You’ll first notice the long line at Mother’s, full of people waiting for the famous po-boys (most notably the Ferdi Special and the DeBris po-boy), jambalaya and shrimp Creole. Each dish is made with the freshest ingredients providing the bold, delicious flavors that keep people coming back for more. Located on Poydras Street’s “Restaurant Row,” Mother’s attracts customers from near and far, feeding everyone from local fishermen to famous movie stars.

Court of Two Sisters For years, the Court of Two Sisters (courtoftwosisters.com) has been a New Orleans dining institution. Many aspects of the restaurant make it one of the most famous places to visit while

in the city. Located on the 600 block of Rue Royal in one of the most beautiful areas of New Orleans, the Court of Two Sisters was once home to several famous politicians, including Sieur Etienne de Perier, the royal governor of Louisiana between 1726 and 1733. Today, the restaurant is most notable for its jazz brunch buffet where live jazz music surrounds diners as they make their way through the enormous buffet filled with made-to-order omelets, fresh seafood, eggs Benedict, grits and sausage, fruit and pasta salads and an endless variety of desserts.

Arnaud’s With a food philosophy that “eating should be a pleasure, not a task to get over in a hurry,” founder Arnaud Cazenave took classic New Orleans dining to a new level at Arnaud’s New Orleans Restaurant (arnauds.com). With an exceptional menu of traditional a la carte items, such as their signature Shrimp Arnaud and Oysters Bienville, customers always leave the restaurant more than satisfied. Arnaud’s also offers several dining areas that fit every mood. You can choose to eat in the elegantly adorned dining room with mosaic floors and glass windows or opt for the lively atmosphere of Arnaud’s Jazz Bistro, where diners can enjoy the music while they eat. The restaurant just recently added the French 75 Bar where patrons can have a cocktail or after-dinner beverage from the extensive drink menu.

Outside of dining, Arnaud’s also has its famous Mardi Gras Museum above the restaurant with an assortment of Carnival court gowns, costumes and other artifacts made in France that provide tourists a peek into the Mardi Gras tradition.

Galatoire’s Open for more than 100 years, Galatoire’s (galatoires.com)

travel prides itself on serving authentic French Creole cuisine that has not changed since the start of the restaurant in 1905. Founder Jean Galatoire brought the family recipes and traditions he collected while living in France and introduced a truly exceptional menu for the restaurant. For generations, the continuously faultless service, ambience and cuisine have provided its customers with an unforgettable dining experience. Some of the most popular items on the menu include the Shrimp Remoulade and banana bread pudding that will surely have any diner asking for more. Galatoire’s has received numerous awards over the years including several from Wine Spectator magazine, honoring the restaurant as the most popular in New Orleans.

Café Du Monde As one of New Orleans’ most famous attractions, Café Du Monde (cafedumonde.com) is a place every person must visit. Known for its delectable French beignets and chicory flavored coffee, the café is a perfect spot to take a break while strolling the streets of the French Quarter.

The coffee shop was established in 1862 in the famous New Orleans French Market where it has served hundreds of customers day after day. Café Du Monde is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week except on Christmas and days when “the occasional hurricane passes too close to New Orleans.” Starting in the 1980s, the café opened up several additional locations in shopping malls in the surrounding New Orleans area.

Mr. B’s Bistro Specializing in regional Creole cuisine and a festive jazz brunch on Sundays, the comfortable atmosphere at Mr. B’s (mrbsbistro.com) is by far one of the most enjoyed dining experiences by tourists and locals alike. Noteworthy dishes include the barbecue shrimp doused with a Worcestershire butter sauce, the Gumbo Ya Ya, and jumbo lump crab cakes that continue to bring customers back for more.

The upscale casual restaurant centered in the heart of the French Quarter brings a unique facet to the New Orleans dining experience that you do not want to miss.

It has received numerous accolades for its tasty cuisine and matchless ambience from Gourmet Magazine, Food & Wine, and even praise from the famous Louisiana con-

noisseur, Chef Emeril Lagasse.

42 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

travel

Atop the Mountain This month, retreat to the Inn at Half-Mile Farm, located in the peaceful North Carolina mountain town of Highlands. It is, as co-owner Wendy Messer puts it, “love at first sight.” TEXT Nikki Aviotti | PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of Inn at Half Mile Farm and Paoletti’s

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estled in the Appalachian Mountains is the quaint North Carolina town of Highlands. After winding your way up a steep mountain road, you’ll find yourself amidst the most beautiful and peaceful of settings. Many of the residents spend only spring and summer here, but any time of year is great to visit Highlands.

Book a stay at the elegant Inn at Half-Mile Farm (innathalfmilefarm.com), where you can rest in one of the 15 rooms in the main house or rent a cabin. Set back off the main road, the inn overlooks a lake equipped with a dock and canoes. Scooter, the inn dog, is a welcoming hostess, along with owners Wendy and Barry Messer.

The farmhouse, built in 1870, is a mark of what was originally a 100-acre working farm before Beth and Jack Henry turned the property into an inn in 2001. The Messers took over the business six years ago. Previously, the couple owned and operated two beach 44| At Home Tennessee • February 2010

resorts in Longboat Key, Florida, after retiring from Chicago. “We loved the business but were ready for a climate change,” says Wendy.

“We spent a lot of time looking at different inns and resorts all over North Carolina before finding the Inn at Half Mile Farm. It was love at first sight.”

The guest rooms are rustic and romantic, many with fireplaces, large jetted tubs and private balconies. As Wendy describes it, the inn is the perfect blend of “kick back and relax and luxury.” The common area is reminiscent of a comfortable living room, with a large fireplace, cozy chairs and a couch, and it is where wine and hors d’oeuvres are served in the early evening. Guests are treated to delicious gourmet breakfasts in the dining room each morning.

For the ultimate relaxing experience, call Lisa at Tranquility Cove Massage (tranquilitycovemassage. com) and schedule an in-room treatment during your stay.

The Inn at Half-Mile Farm is not only a perfect place for a

quiet getaway, but is also a great wedding location. The inn hosts between 10 and 12 weddings of up to 175 guests each year during the months of May, June and September.

“The inn is a wonderful blend of romance and intimacy,” says Wendy. “We recognize what an important day this is for the bride and groom and work very hard to make it special and magical.” The ceremony generally takes place on the front lawn that overlooks the lake, and a tent is set up in front of the house for the reception. There is even a honeymoon suite for newlyweds.

In downtown Highlands there are tons of small shops lining Main Street. Stop in at one of the many stores for unique gifts and clothing. For a fantastic lunch, dine at Mountain Fresh Grocery (mountainfreshgrocery.com), a grocery store and deli combo, with delicious sandwiches and soups.

Or stop in at Bucks Coffee Cafe (828.526.0020) for a great selection of coffee and sandwiches. It is also

travel (left to right) The Inn at Half-Mile Farm in winter, Paoletti’s

a nice place to spend time with a book or sit by the window and people watch.

Visit Ristorante Paoletti (paolettis.com) for a dinner of fresh fish and homemade pasta.

(The lasagna con Melanzane, which is lasagna with eggplant and mozzarella, is a wonderful choice.) If you’re aching to try something more exotic, order the elk. Paoletti’s also has an impressive selection of wines—the restaurant won the Wine Spectator Best of Award of Excellence in 2009.

For a romantic dinner, eat at On the Verandah (ontheverandah.com), open since 1981. The restaurant uses in-season and locally grown ingredients, so the menu changes often. If available, make sure to start with a bowl of the French onion soup. During the warm months, the restaurant’s namesake veranda is great for dining and overlooks Lake Sequoyah. A special feature of On the Verandah is its wall of hot sauce, some of which were created by owner Alan Figel. His son Andrew is now executive chef at the restaurant, housed in a building that used to be a speakeasy.

No matter the season, Highlands is the perfect escape for anyone wanting a little rest and relaxation. The Inn at Half-Mile Farms is a romantic retreat with all the comforts of home but none of the responsibility. And even if you are trapped there in a snowstorm, the inn’s staff will take care of your every last need and treat you like a pampered guest, as well as a member of the family.

See Sources for Details

February 2010 • athometn.com | 45

travel

Wed in Luxury From breathtaking venues to expert staff, many of Tennessee’s top hotels offer ideal settings for the big day. Whether your bride is looking for an intimate outdoor ceremony, rooftop nuptials or a fairytale-style ballroom reception, these hotels have it all. TEXT Marty Marbry | PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of Blackberry Farms and Whitestone Country Inn

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he all-important question has been asked and it’s time to start planning a wedding. Lucky for you, Tennessee is full of luxury hotels that provide a variety of wedding services. Rely on your tastes and the expertise of some of the state’s finest hotels to ensure that your magical day is everything you’ve dreamed.

do” or for any of the activities leading up to the memorable occasion. The Madison also offers menu catering from the award-winning Grill 83. Overseeing approximately 35 wedding activities each year, the expert staff will dazzle you and your guests. This boutique luxury hotel is full of refined Southern charm, classic European elegance and is ideal for your distinctive wedding.

Peabody Hotel

Hermitage Hotel

For almost 140 years the “South’s Grand Hotel” has been helping MidSoutherners create memories. From first dates to the big day, the Peabody Memphis (peabodymemphis.com) offers couples a well-appointed dream setting. With ballrooms that look like an intricately decorated wedding cake to a rooftop that has the mighty Mississippi River as a backdrop, this Four-Diamond, Four-Star hotel will please the most discriminating bride. A catering staff that is only limited by your imagination will create a lavish event any bride would be proud to call her own. The hotel wedding and catering staff assists in the planning of more than 100 weddings of varying size and style each year.

Opulent décor and a timeless setting welcome you to the Hermitage Hotel (hermitagehotel.com) in Nashville. This luxurious hotel places an emphasis on the finer details of your special day. The Hermitage wedding professionals know that the magic doesn’t just happen but takes deliberate planning. Begin your celebrations with engagement parties, bridal teas or your rehearsal dinner at the recently renovated hotel. Impeccable details, a welcoming staff and timeless architecture all come together to create your dream wedding. Since 1910 the Hermitage Hotel, working with more than 80 brides a year, has been making brides smile.

Union Station Madison Hotel The Madison Hotel (madisonhotelmemphis.com), located in downtown Memphis, is the ideal location for your nuptials. The mezzanine space and rooftop terrace will transform to create unique venues for the day you say “I 46 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

Let your history together begin at one of Nashville’s most desirable historic wedding locations, Union Station (unionstationhotelnashville.com). Old World character and chic, modern-day luxury best describe this 100-year-old railway station. Brides and their guests

marvel at the 65-foot, barrel-vaulted lobby ceiling, featuring gold-leaf medallions and 100-year-old original Tiffany styled stained glass (a favorite location for bridal photos). This magnificent wedding venue helps to capture the essence of what a bride desires. Whether you choose to celebrate your day in the grand lobby or you are looking for a more intimate setting, the Union Station wedding planners are ready to set the stage for your happily ever after.

Gaylord Opryland Gaylord Opryland offers you everything in one place (or two or three.)

You can plan the most romantic day of your life to take place amid the lush greenery and ever-blooming flowers of the garden conservatories or create your storybook event aboard a magnificent riverboat as the sun sets over the Cumberland River. Or, if the other passion in your life is golf, plan an unforgettable event at Gaylord Springs Golf Links.

The wedding team at Gaylord Opryland will be by your side as you plan each detail of the big event. Creating many weddings each year, these professionals still get excited over each new bride. To make your planning process easier you can download their Interactive Wedding Guide at weddings@gaylordhotels.com.

Whitestone Country Inn Romantic is the best way to describe weddings at Whitestone Country Inn

travel (left to right) Blackberry Farms and Whitestone Country Inn

(whitestoneinn.com). The staff’s attention to detail is obvious the minute you walk through the door. They provide all the services needed to create a stress-free wedding. From minister to musicians, wedding director to florist, Whitestone offers a comprehensive package. The inn sits atop a hill with a majestic view of Watts Bar Lake, providing a beautiful setting for both indoor and outdoor weddings. The picturesque chapel seats 200 or you can select one of the gazebos located on the 360-acre country estate as the perfect location for your wedding day. Celebrating more than 100 weddings a year, Whitestone Country Inn takes care to add the special touches to each and every one. What bride doesn’t dream of arriving at her wedding in a horsedrawn carriage and dancing her first dance under a canopy of stars?

The Chattanoogan Luxury is the reason brides select the Chattanoogan Hotel (chattanooganhotel.com) for their wedding and reception. With several wedding packages to choose from, the Chattanoogan will make your day memorable. Scores of Tennessee brides have turned over the details of their event to the experienced and caring staff at the hotel. From elegant, whitegloved butler service and extravagant sitdown dinners to intimate hors d’oeuvre buffets, this facility promises to make your day unforgettable.

Blackberry Farm Located in the Smoky Mountain foothills, Blackberry Farm (blackberryfarm. com) offers a grand array of enchanting sites to fulfill every bride’s dream.

Situated on a pastoral 4,200-acre estate, this luxurious hotel will fill your wedding party with a peaceful calm. Bridal parties are encouraged to indulge in the ultimate pampering that is synonymous with Blackberry Farm. You and your guests will reconnect with nature as you explore this outdoor sanctuary overflowing with natural beauty. Your choices for that special day are countless. Plan the perfect party or reception in an extraordinary barn that was brought down from Pennsylvania and lovingly rebuilt on the property.

February 2010 • athometn.com | 47

at home with

Chocolate-Covered Tradition

Since 1902, Dinstuhl’s Fine Candies has been serving delicious delicacies to the people of Memphis and beyond. As the company expands, the family run business continues the tradition of offering quality candies and great service.

TEXT C. Elise Dillingham PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of Dinstuhl’s Fine Candies

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n a time when the neighborhood candy store has become a rare sight, Dinstuhl’s Fine Candies has remained a Memphis staple that holds a place in the hearts of many in the Mid-South. Dinstuhl’s, which began as an ice cream parlor and candy store, was opened in 1902 in downtown Memphis by Charles Martin Dinstuhl, Sr. During the 1960s, Gene Dinstuhl, a third generation Dinstuhl’s candy maker, expanded the company to the Laurelwood Shopping Center in east Memphis.

Today, Dinstuhl’s also has a location in Saddle Creek in Germantown and the candy is sold in various Tennessee and Mississippi locations.

“Chocolate pecan was one of the first candies made and we still use the original formula,” says Rebecca Dinstuhl, president of the

48 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

company. In fact, Rebecca says, the company rarely alters recipes with the exception of removing gelatin from the kitchen to adhere to kosher standards. “Our chocolate fudge is from the original recipe,” she says. “So many of them are tried-and-true and have been used for so many years that rarely do we really change that up.”

Rebecca, whose family was in the candy business in Alabama, became president of the company in 2004. “I married Gary Dinstuhl, who is the fourth generation [of Dinstuhl‘s],” she explains. “We were married for 18 years and then went our separate ways.

Gary married again and after his parents retired, he and his wife ran the company. Six years ago they sold the financial side.”

Rebecca was then hired to come back and run the company.

“Part of my motivation was our

son Andrew, who was working in the company and really has a passion for the business and wanted to see it continue,” says Rebecca.

“That was part of the motivation to come back and maintain the traditions and the quality of Dinstuhl’s so it would be around for generations to come.”

Rebecca has a staff of about 20 to 25 people to assist her in the 11,000-square-foot candy kitchen, where all confections are made and then sent to the surrounding locations.

“We’re always exploring new things,” Rebecca says. “We make over 250 kinds of candy so I’m trying to streamline a little bit.

The reason we make so many is because people all have their favorite and it’s hard to stop making something that people love so much.”

One of the newest items Din-

at home with stuhl’s offers is a 72 percent highcocoa chocolate. The company has also developed Heavenly Crunch, which Rebecca describes as somewhere between a candy and a snack mix. It includes pretzels, golden grahams, dried cranberries and nuts all tossed in white chocolate. Dinstuhl’s also offers chocolate-covered Oreos and chocolatecovered graham crackers. A newer item is the pogo stick, which is a pretzel rod dipped in caramel, then in chocolate.

“Sometimes we may see or hear of a combination candy and then we try and put our own unique spin on it, using our own quality ingredients,” Rebecca says. “We make everything from the beginning.”

Currently in the works is “chocodough,” which will be like a chocolate Play-Doh. For Valentine’s Day, Dinstuhl’s allows shoppers to customize gifts for that special someone. “Everybody has their own favorite,” Rebecca says. “We will pack your favorite into a heart shaped box and gift wrap it.”

The Laurelwood location has a chocolate maître d’ to help around the holiday, who assists customers with taking purchases to their cars and acts as a doorman.

Rebecca says she believes the reason the company has been so successful since its inception in 1902 is quality and tradition. “I get these wonderful letters from people and it brings tears to my eyes,” she says. “I think first of all the quality has been the number one thing. And I think it represents some wonderful memories and traditions of families in Memphis. That’s been a part of the staying power. We have people who say they remember when their grandmother brought them

into Dinstuhl‘s for the first time.”

Continuing with the Dinstuhl’s connection to Memphis, the company will be a major sponsor of “Chocolate, The Exhibition” at the Pink Palace Museum, which will be open until May 2. “It’s from an educational standpoint to teach children a little bit more about chocolate and its origin and also nutritious benefits,” Rebecca says.

“We’re doing the launch of the Chocodough in conjunction [with the exhibit].”

In 2006, Dinstuhl’s even had the opportunity to make candy for the Super Bowl. “They contacted us and asked us to make a truffle pop for the Super Bowl and we were excited about it,” Rebecca says. “We developed it just for that and have offered it since then.”

The truffle pop was so popular that the Kentucky Derby contacted Dinstuhl’s, as well as the NBA in Miami. “Miami ended up winning the national championship that year,” Rebecca says. “We say it’s the magic of the truffle pop.”

Dinstuhl notes one of her objectives in the upcoming year is to lay the groundwork for expansion. “Our goal is to grow the company, expanding beyond Memphis, into more of a regional company,” she says. “We’ve had a lot of requests to open Dinstuhl’s in other cities in the area, so that’s something we’re looking into as a possibility. We’re expanding our wholesale offering to wholesale gift shops, not only in Memphis but beyond.”

See Sources for Details

February 2010 • athometn.com | 49

A neutral palate of brown, black and metallic allows the eye to focus on the dramatic rose wallpaper around which this upstairs bedroom was designed. Mirrored furniture and bands of varying pink shades soften the room and unique accents like a birdcage filled with candles represent Teresa’s love of repurposed items.

It’s All in the Mix Germantown interior designer Teresa Davis knows that good home design requires more than great furnishings and color schemes—the best touches are those that illustrate the people who live there. In her own home, she has carefully selected pieces with histories of their own achieving a design that truly embodies the philosophy, “It’s the mix, not the match.”

TEXT Lindsey Phillips | PHOTOGRAPHY Mike Boatman

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he Germantown home of interior designer Teresa Davis is full of stories. But, it’s not the “casual European” look of the 5,000 square-foot structure— built shortly before the Davis family moved in six years ago—that allows Teresa to narrate her way through the rooms. Rather, the careful manner in which she has selected and arranged the furnishings, decor and other interior accents animates the designer. “I love pieces that have history,” says Teresa, who peruses flea markets and antique stores regularly for the next big find, be it a set of candy jars once displayed in an English drugstore or a one-of-a-kind rug. “I like spaces to be individual, not looking like the decorator just left.”

Selective Tone The home’s decor is a collection of antique, vintage and repurposed pieces melded together by an eclectic designer’s vision—it’s obvious that Teresa, who has a degree in art and design from the University of Kansas and has been an Allied member of ASID for 20 years, is an expert at thoughtfully marrying her architectural eye with artistic influences. Take the wrought-iron table in the hearth room, for example. To the untrained eye it is simply a table—an uncommon, lovely piece, obviously not picked up at your everyday furniture store—but still, a table. But let Teresa catch you looking at it and she will explain that the table is actually made out of a wrought-iron, Victorian widow’s peak, flipped upside down to take advantage of its shape. A pair of reupholstered vintage chairs sit next to a chest of drawers from the Paris Flea Market in the same room; Teresa points out that the flowing script on the fabric is an enlarged copy of actual handwriting from old French documents. In the foyer, French shutters frame the entrance to the living room. When Teresa realized that tiny vines still adhered to the wood, she couldn’t bear to alter the shutters and placed them as they were in the space. “My design philosophy involves the interplay of contrasts,” Teresa explains. “Refined and rustic, rough and smooth, modern and antique. It creates interest and depth—the unexpected use of a raw edge of silk, a lampshade flipped to utilize the shape more effectively or a surprising use of a piece of furniture all contribute to that unique style.”

Old English candy jars are placed among vintage cake stands, cherubs, hyacinths and delphiniums in the dining room for an elegant, garden-inspired atmosphere.

Midwest to Mid-South The Davises moved from Kansas to West Tennessee in 2002 to be closer to FedEx where Teresa’s late husband, a pilot, worked. For the two years before they found their home in Germantown’s Grove Park neighborhood, the family of five (and their two dogs) lived in a tiny three-bedroom apartment.

“My end tables were dog crates with slipcovers,” Teresa laughs.

“I had to be resourceful in such a small place.”

When the Davises finally moved into the five-bedroom, four-and-a-half bath home in 2003, Teresa immediately set to work personalizing the space. But when Ray, her husband of 25 years, was killed in a private plane crash on January 31, 2008, Teresa had to decide what she would do next. Her newly opened home store, Post 31, was the result. “A very good friend of mine said, ‘Don’t ask why the Lord took Ray away, but why he left you,’” Teresa recalls. “That advice helped me redirect my 52 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

To better utilize the shape of the lamp shades on the chandelier, Teresa flipped them upside down. A couch on one side of the table, instead of chairs, provides a more comfortable and inviting form of seating.

Fresh flowers add a pop of color to a mix of black and white plates arranged on the kitchen table.

This geographically themed room was inspired by two maps Teresa found on a road trip.

Teresa has a collection of about 20 vintage and antique trophy jars that she uses throughout the house as vases, planters and accent items.

Designed around the occupant’s love of hunting, Teresa incorporated antlers, rustic wood bed frames and a natural color scheme in this bedroom. Old movie seats were placed below the window.

Teresa’s use of mirrors continues throughout the home as well. “Mirrors make a space look big, large and bright,” she says. “They give another dimension.”

When Teresa found these French shutters they were still covered in small vines.

She left them as they were and framed the living room doorway

Comfortable cow hide chairs and a wood-burning fireplace make this the most popular room in the home during winter. A lantern acts as a display case with photographs of the Davis family.

feature life and refocus. I decided to open the store so I could move forward in a positive way.”

Adding to the significance of the 31st day of the month for Teresa, her youngest son Duke left for college at Middle Tennessee State University on August 31, 2009. He plans to follow in his father’s footsteps and has enrolled in the professional pilot program there.

Now an empty-nester, Teresa has refocused her sights more intensely on her interior design career, opening the doors of the store on November 11, 2009. Post 31 offers furnishings, gifts and interior design services all based on Teresa’s mantra: “It’s the mix, not the match.”

Diverse Details For her own home, Teresa chose a neutral palette accented with color while scored and stained floors provide “an artful foundation for mixing styles,” she explains. “The design is always evolving,” she says.

“I love to create layers from various textures, colors and shapes. I’m not a designer who goes out and buys a room.”

Her layering method is seen throughout the home in the antique Persian and Oushak rugs that sit on top of bound sisal pieces; in mirrors suspended from existing mirrors; and in architectural pieces that hang in front of windows, among plenty of other touches.

Chandeliers, candles, dimmers and lamps provide soft, never harsh, lighting. Teresa has also worked with the home’s expansive windows and natural light sources to play on the open, airy atmosphere they create. She often displays and plants fresh flowers, greenery (often clipped from her backyard— “It gives it a wild look, not so contrived.”) and grasses in containers like her collection of vintage and antique trophy jars.

Additionally, Teresa incorporates many design elements, such as chandeliers, into the upper one-third portion of rooms; a space she says is often overlooked.

In the hearth room she took advantage of the space by running two beams across the upper part of the room and topping them with a pair of bird figurines, a design accent that has garnered a unique reaction from the family’s two German shorthaired pointers, Rosie and Gunner. “They’re pointing my birds,” Teresa says. “We

took [the birds] down so I could show them, ‘look it’s not a real bird.’”

She designed many rooms in the home around a central element such as the breathtaking rose wallpaper in her daughter Mimi’s upstairs bedroom, offset by neutral browns, metallics and blacks and walls painted in bands of varying shades of pink. A geographically themed guest bedroom was designed around two maps of the Americas that Teresa found on a road trip and her oldest son Andy’s room is centered around his love of hunting. The living room, a favorite space in winter, features cowhide chairs and a wood-burning fireplace, creating a comfortable gathering area for the family.

The Aesthetics of Memories “My favorite rooms are not the well-decorated rooms, but the ones where memories are created,” Teresa says. “Make your home a statement of yourself and a place where you find comfort and refuge.”

She has certainly created refuge in her own home by incorporating personal details into every room. Perhaps the most noticeable are the numerous framed portraits and candid photographs Teresa has snapped of her three children through the years. But even old books, strategically scattered around the living room, carry a subtle significance—the title Flying for Uncle Sam, for example, pays homage to the family’s tradition of service in the U.S. Air Force, which began with Ray and continues with Andy and Duke. The upstairs bonus room is dedicated to this history, with Duke’s handmade remote control planes suspended from the ceiling and a hand-carved coat tree displaying Ray’s flying gear.

Teresa says the inspiration for her home’s design and those of her clients comes from many venues and experiences, from flea markets and shops to crosscountry road trips and walks outside. After all, there’s much more to a home than furniture and color schemes.

“A home is not only about the pieces you collect, but a personal expression of your style, family and memories,” she says. “I want rooms to show the people who live there.”

See Sources for Details

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French gray walls add an air of calm to the master bedroom and Teresa’s focus on neutrals and textures continue in the space as well. An antique desk sits beneath the window.

home and garden

Diving into Design Award-winning interior designer Kimberly Varner helped a Cleveland couple navigate the tricky waters of renovation with stunning results. She turned an aqua, outdated kitchen into a classic, calming space with no major construction at all. TEXT MERRELL MCGINNESS | PHOTO Courtesy of Kimberly Varner

W

hen interior designer Kimberly Varner, ASID, recalls the day Theresa and Stephen Crump contacted her to help with a redesign, one word comes to her mind: Help!

Their kitchen was drowning in a sea of aqua and they were finally ready to take the redecorating plunge. The Cleveland couple moved into their four-bedroom, three-bath house eight years ago with their daughters Emily, 9, and Sarah, 12. And while Theresa had always hated the checkerboard tile floor, bright white cabinets and multi-colored wallpaper border, she knew that changing one thing would have a domino effect. “It just felt overwhelming,” recalls Theresa. “I knew I needed a decorator but finding the time was tough. We’re busy 10 months out of the year.”

The couple was pining for a light and peaceful space that would flow with the rest of the house but still function as an organized hub of the household. Stephen, the chef of the family, was looking for better lighting and plenty of space for cooking. But the busy family of four didn’t want a lengthy renovation. They also needed the facelift to fit within their budget.

Varner felt up to the task.“There’s a stigma that interior designers have to be expensive,” says Varner. “But quality design help can be affordable.”

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After receiving the Crumps’ design SOS, Varner sprang into action. Work began about two weeks after the initial consultation. Luckily, the Crumps were happy with their basic layout, so major construction was not necessary. To stay within time and budget constraints, the cabinets were kept in place but painted soft white with a light-brown glaze for texture. Still, Varner had to “raise” them visually.

To do so, she contracted custom faux panels to be installed over the soffit, giving the illusion of height. Diagonally-placed tiles on the backsplash also helped open up the space, while under-cabinet lighting eliminated dark shadows.

In fact, layered lighting was a key element to creating the peaceful new glow in the kitchen. The fluorescent overhead lighting was replaced with hanging fixtures over the center island and kitchen table. All of the new fixtures featured dimmers, giving the Crumps flexibility when entertaining. To create even more height in the kitchen, floor-to-ceiling drapes replaced the existing valance and the ceiling was painted the same color as the walls. Varner also created a ledge bar with stools to add more seating options.

The neutral color palette was inspired by a recent masterbedroom redo. Accent colors of red and soft turquoise were selected to comple-

ment other areas of the house such as the dining and living rooms. The countertops were replaced with brown- and black-toned granite, and the center island was painted dark brown to ground the space. To tie the design elements together, oak floors in a rich cherry finish replaced the black-and-white tile. As a finishing touch, one of Emily’s flower paintings was framed and displayed.

Based in Cleveland, Varner has been helping clients realize the full potential of their spaces for nearly 20 years. After earning a bachelor’s degree in interior design from the University of Tennessee, Varner was employed by a design firm in Birmingham prior to returning to her hometown. Before striking out on her own, Varner worked with awardwinning design firm Anne Jones and Associates, taking on projects such as the Southern Living Summerhill Tour home and a tree house featured on PBS television. Ultimately, Varner says the secret to her success is listening to her clients. She describes her role in each project as “negotiator, teacher, counselor and mediator.”

“It was wonderful working with Kimberly,” says Theresa. “We already have plans to use her again this spring.”

home and garden

Design Decisions Choosing the right interior designer is the first step to a project’s success. Kimberly offers the following guidelines to get you headed in the right direction.

Make sure you connect Communication between designer and client is crucial to having a positive experience.

Being a good designer is more than talent; they should also be a good listener, patient and open-minded to your input, says Varner.

Ask to view past work Look for variety in the designer’s portfolio, which means he or she is willing to adapt to each client’s wants and needs.

Remember, designers are trying to enhance your personal style, not push their own style on you.

Get all the info Expect upfront discussions about cost and time. “I always try to be very open about what the client can expect in terms of time and money; then I keep them informed as the project moves forward,” says Varner.

Consider your options Most designers in the area are willing to work in a variety of ways, says Varner. If you feel you can handle the renovation yourself, perhaps a onehour consultation is all you need. If you prefer more guidance, designers can manage the entire project from ordering the furniture to hanging the pictures.

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ask the expert

Flower Focus Fabulous flowers are a huge part of the big day, but choosing a bloom that best suits the wedding style can seem overwhelming. At Home Tennessee sat down with Kellie Deckard, wedding coordinator for Memphis’ Holliday Flowers, for expert tips and a behind-the-scenes look into current trends. PHOTOS courtesy of dreamstime.com

AHT: What should a bride consider when choosing wedding flowers?

Kellie Deckard: Brides always want to have their venue and color palette in mind before considering flowers. There’s so much we have to work with to create a great look for their wedding. Of course season is important as well. If you keep these things in mind you’re headed in the right direction for a beautiful day!

AHT: Which flowers are best for Tennessee weddings in summer, spring, winter and fall?

KD: Of course hydrangeas are always beautiful, along with magnolias and garden variety roses in the summer. Spring weddings are great because there’s such a variety to choose from including great parrot tulips, muscari, hyacinth and all sorts of wonderful blooming branches! Winter brings fragrant winter greens and berries and fall leads to a great color palette of deep rich dahlias, mums and bittersweet.

AHT: How can a bride choose which flowers best suit her needs?

KD: Think about the style you like along with your color palette. If you start out by determining an overall look or style you are drawn to rather than particular flowers, we then can put together just the right combination of flowers to create your vision.

AHT: What are some popular wedding flower trends?

KD: We’ve been seeing a lot more of the pavé style— 72 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

a clustered, full, mounded look of flowers versus large and airy arrangements. Styles have become very textural as well, giving us the chance to work with more exotic flowers and foliages not traditionally used in weddings. It’s not just about pink roses anymore.

AHT: What are the most popular colors and types of flowers?

KD: There’s such a variety of colors and styles to choose from and everyone is so different! That’s what makes our job so fun. But if you will look at the trends you will see that green has taken over the traditional white. We’re calling it the new neutral.

Paired with corals and blush tones you have a great soft spring look, and added to browns, burnt oranges and deep fuscia you have a vibrant fall look!

AHT: What percentage of the wedding budget should generally be allotted for flowers?

KD: This seems to be the toughest question I have for people: “What is the budget you’d like to stay within?” People may not know it, but this is a very important one. We can work with any budget out there. The thing about it is, we have to have some idea if we’re talking simple and small versus large and over-the-top. I think some people are too afraid to give a budget with the idea in mind that we will either think it’s not enough or try to use up all they have. That’s not the case. The reason it’s so important is just for the simple fact that there are so many flowers out there to choose from, and with a some-

ask the expert what accurate budget range, we can choose from the appropriate flowers and styles to get the look brides are after, as well as stay within the budget. That would be the best-case scenario when brides get that quote back from the florist, I think!

AHT: Which flowers are the most affordable?

KD: When thinking about affordability, you do want to think about the season as well as size of the flowers. Just think, a hydrangea is the size of a grapefruit, where as a stephanotis is the size of a quarter. When you’re comparing these two you will see the same price on the price sheet, but what you get for your money is much, much different. Of course you need those accents of dainty flowers to make the look complete, but those can be used sparingly. So use the less expensive larger flowers for bulk and use the more expensive exotic flowers as accents and you will have the best of both worlds.

AHT: It’s the big day and the flowers have arrived. How can the bride ensure they will look fresh for the wedding?

KD: Since such a high quality flower is ordered for the wedding, they are in a very fresh state when they are delivered to the ceremony. We deliver all our bouquets in water in vases, and corsages and boutonnières are delivered in a refrigeratorsafe box. Altar flowers are made in foam to ensure long lasting arrangements, so they even look great days after the ceremony (which the churches love!)

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ask the expert

All About Engagement Rings Diamonds may be a girl’s best friend, but stones can stress a husband-to-be if he doesn’t know his alphabet—namely, the “Four C’s.” Learn the lingo of diamonds from Chuck Cooper of Van Atkins Jewelers and you’re all set for your trip to the jewelry store. PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of Van Atkins Jewelers and dreamstime.com

Learning to talk the talk Carat Carat refers to the actual weight of the diamond. When purchasing a diamond, buying a single carat stone versus choosing smaller stones that add up to a carat is much more expensive. “When you’re buying a larger stone, your price per carat goes up,” says Chuck Cooper of Van Atkins Jewelers. explains. “It’s just more rare Ring available at Van Atkins to find that bigger stone and price is based on rarity.” However, that single stone is the best investment you’ll ever make in jewelry, Chuck reminds, because it will appreciate in value much more than the smaller diamonds.

Color Diamonds are rated on the Gemological Institute of America (G.I.A.) color scale, which ranges from colorless D diamonds to Z stones. “Deep D is as white as you can get,” says Chuck. “Any kind of color that takes away from white brings it down the scale.” But did you know diamonds come in every color of the rainbow? Because pricing is based on rarity, brilliantly colored stones (like canary yellow) can be quite pricey—in fact, Chuck says the most expensive one-carat diamond he’s ever seen was a vivid red.

Cut Contrary to popular belief, the cut of the diamond does not refer to the shape but actually to the stone’s proportions. “When you get the right proportions, that’s what gives you that sparkling fire and brilliance,” Chuck explains. Ideal cuts vary based on the diamond’s shape, so it will be different for a princess shape than a round brilliant.

The best thing to do to ensure you get a good cut, Chuck says, is find a jeweler you trust.

Clarity “It’s kind of like a weed in a garden,” Chuck says, referring to inclusions and blemishes. “A rose can be a weed if it’s not supposed to be there.” The two most common flaws are the interior “white feathers,” or cracks in the stone and the exterior “naturals,” which refers to a an unpolished surface. Carbon spots are also common flaws.

Diamond Trends Flashback While the round brilliant cut is and probably always will be the most popular diamond shape, two recent trends are blasts from the past. Small accent stones lining the band are a 1920s style and cushion diamonds, with their rounded edges, are a style from the 1900s and earlier, when square diamonds could not be cut to have corner edges.

Economic Engagement “2009 economically was probably a tough year for most people, but we actual sold more rings than we ever have,” Chuck says, adding that most were from the Van Atkins Rose Collection costing $3,500 or less.

Precious Metal Another trend is the preferred band metal— “We’re still selling over 90 percent either white gold or platinum,” Chuck says.

Diamond Dollars While Chuck says the standard savings for an engagement ring should add up to two months’ pay, jewelers can work with any budget.

Ring available at Van Atkins

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food

A Gourmet Evolution

Gourmet and Company in Johnson City has been serving up Southern favorites like pimento cheese quesadillas and apricot tea (which sells by the gallon) to Tennesseeans for decades. While the business has already expanded to include a restaurant with high-quality ingredients and an innovative chef, there are always more plans on the horizon for this local favorite.

TEXT JILLIEN FRY | PHOTOGRAPHY Eric McCarty

V

on Bailey and Howard Walker, owners of Gourmet and Company in Johnson City, have taken a simple gourmet food store and turned it into a thriving restaurant and shop that is constantly changing and expanding.

Bailey acquired the business in 1989 as a recent graduate, and Walker became part of the project when the two wed. Over time, Gourmet and Company has expanded from a shop with gourmet to-go options and now includes a restaurant with a lounge and outdoor dining area. The stock of the store has also changed, moving more from the food side of retail to housewares and other home items, Walker says.

Although the store may look different now, people can still get many of the items that first brought them through the door. Box lunches and catering are still a large part of the business and the casual lunch atmosphere keeps this a popular place during the day.

At night, the mood shifts toward fine dining. The lounge area and patio offer different venues than most places in Johnson City.

“It’s not your typical bar,” says

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Walker. “We have very comfortable furniture, very eclectic furniture. It’s a very nice atmosphere that is kind of unique to this area.”

The surroundings and the attitude of staff also help to bring in many repeat customers.

“It’s really a family atmosphere,” says Bailey. “It’s not like going in somewhere corporate. We’ve really built up a rapport with our clients.

We know most of their names and what they like and can make suggestions.”

Some old Southern classics have been given a new twist here and show Gourmet and Company’s commitment to good food and products, even with simple items like the favorite pimento cheese quesadilla, made from Bailey’s 94-year-old grandmother’s recipe. Another customer favorite is apricot tea, made fresh by brewing apricot leaves with the tea instead of using syrups. “We have people who come in more than two times a day for it,” Bailey said. “People take gallons to go.”

To ensure freshness, there is a baker on staff who bakes bread every morning for the sandwiches. Gourmet and Company also offers a variety of desserts that people can take

with them or eat in the restaurant.

The many different parts of the business play off of each other well.

“It’s constantly growing and changing and evolving,” Bailey says. A new chef at the restaurant is also making changes to the menu, but keeping the core ideas of good food and good products intact.

Meet the Chef Jackson Kramer joined the staff as executive chef in November. A veteran of Interim and Sole Restaurants in Memphis, Kramer made the move to Gourmet and Company looking for a change of pace. “It’s more family oriented, but still independent,” Kramer says. “It’s a new challenge I’m excited to take on.”

One of Kramer’s trademarks is cooking with as many local products as possible. He also believes in using source product—knowing where the item is coming from. The contacts Kramer built up in Memphis are still serving him in Johnson City.

“We know where our oysters come from, we know where our fish comes from,” Walker says. “It’s not just placing an order from anywhere.”

Kramer’s focus on using as much local cuisine as possible fits in well

food at the restaurant. He is working with local farms to get produce and likes to change the menu as the availability of fresh products changes.“I change my menu constantly with the seasons,” Kramer says. “I just changed to more comfort food and winter dishes.”

Kramer says his food is based on what he likes to eat and how he likes to eat. As a big fan of pork and seafood, these items are regularly on the menu. He also likes to use common ingredients and showcase them in a new way. “I like things to be kind of normal for somebody and also have something they’ve never seen before,” he says.

Kramer says he was unsure of how the clientele would respond to his menu items, but so far the response has been good. “At first, people weren’t used to it, but now they really enjoy it,” Kramer says. “People are people and they enjoy the same kind of things.”

For those clients who can’t find something they want on the menu, Kramer is happy to make changes or prepare something special when possible. He says they are happy to tweak dishes for people’s tastes or to make more options for vegetarians.

With all the changes that have already occurred in the past 20 years, what is in the future for Gourmet and Company? With projects ranging from a bridal registry to catering and private dining, things are always busy inside the shop. While they have been approached about opening branches in nearby towns, Bailey and Walker say there are no plans to do so as of now.

The staff is always trying new things, however. Current plans include a wine and food tasting as well as discussing the possibility of a truffle tasting with a local truffle farmer.

Gourmet and Company 214 East Mountcastle, Suite J Johnson City, TN 37604 423.929.9007, gourmetandcompany.com

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Shower Your Bride Around the Clock Put a spin on the classic bridal shower by throwing an Around the Clock event complete with corresponding gifts and snacks. Time flies when you’re having fun!

TEXT KRISTEN WADDELL| RECIPES L’Ecole Culinaire Memphis | PHOTOGRAPHY courtesy of L’Ecole Culinaire Memphis and dreamstime.com

food Menu Eggs Benedict Muffin Frittata Crab Avocado Soup Creamy Crab Seafood Bake Cheddar Garlic Crackers Setting the Scene

A trendy new idea for 2010 is to host an Around the Clock bridal shower, a themed event designed to help the bride receive functional, creative gifts for all hours of the day. The hostess designates a length of time, usually early morning to late night, and each guest is given a specific hour on their individual invitation. The guest must then buy a gift for the bride that coincides with their designed time slot. For example, a guest who is designated to 7 a.m. may choose a coffee pot or a bathrobe as the perfect gift, while someone assigned to 6 p.m. may decide to give a pewter serving platter or a place setting of china. Guests should check the bride’s registry for items that correspond with their specific time and make sure not to buy a gift someone has already purchased.

When creating invitations for this themed shower, a traditional layout may be suitable and a clock image would be appropriate, but remember to customize each invitation with its own unique time on the clock face. A brief description of the event may also be needed as this event style will be new to some of your guests. When the guests arrive, the hostess should arrange the gifts out for the bride to open in chronological order from early morning to midnight and you should seat your guests in a semicircle around the bride’s chair for easy viewing of each gift.

You can be really creative with the menu and decoration for this shower, as you can incorporate dishes from every mealtime – breakfast, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner and a midnight snack. You will want to select menu options that you can arrange in stations around the room or clockwise around your dining table. For example, Eggs Benedict and coffee would make a great breakfast station. For afternoon tea, set up a sampling of flavored teas and cookies.

A large floral centerpiece will draw the eyes to the clock-style buffet and clocks can be placed near each menu item for verification of meal time.

Finally, each guest should receive a small favor as they leave. As a play on the party theme, send each guest home with a kitchen timer or kitchen-themed to-do list notepad.

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food

Recipes Eggs Benedict 1 English muffin, split 2 Canadian bacon slices salt (to taste) 1 oz. vinegar 2 eggs 4 oz. hollandaise sauce 1. Lightly toast English muffin. Saute or griddle the bacon slices until hot.

2. Bring 1 quart water to a boil and add the salt and vinegar. Add the eggs and poach until done.

3. Place muffins on a plate and top with the bacon slices. Place an egg on each slice of bacon and cover with the hollandaise.

Muffin Frittata 6 eggs, beaten 1 oz. Parmesan cheese, grated ½ tsp. black pepper Pinch salt 3 tsp. butter, divided ½ c. roasted asparagus, chopped ½ c. country ham, chopped 1 Tbsp. parsley leaves, chopped 1. Preheat oven to 350 ° 2. In a medium-size bowl, using a fork, blend together eggs, Parmesan, pepper, and salt.

3. Heat a small sauté pan, add 1 tsp. butter to pan and melt. Add asparagus and ham to pan and sauté for 2 to 3 minutes.

4. Add sautéed mixture to beaten egg mixture and stir to combine. Add remaining butter, melted, evenly to a 6-cup muffin pan. Evenly divide the mixture into the muffin tin. Sprinkle 86 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

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with parsley.

5. Place pan into oven and bake approximately 15 minutes or until eggs are just set and knife inserted into muffin comes out clean. Remove from tins and serve immediately or serve at room temperature.

Crab Avocado Soup 5 avocados, halved, pitted and peeled juice of 2 limes 4 green onions, chopped 3 Tbsp. cilantro, chopped 1 tsp. Tabasco sauce Salt and pepper, to taste 1 quart half and half 4 ounces canned crab meat 1. Puree avocados in a food processor. Combine anext five ingredients thoroughly, taste for seasoning and adjust with lime juice and salt and pepper. Add half and half to thin and make to soup consistency.

2.Garnish with crab meat and fresh lemon zest and a drizzle of crème fraiche.e and pepper. Set aside to cool.

Creamy Crab Seafood Bake Filling 2 8 oz.packages cream cheese, softened 6 eggs ¾ c. all-purpose flour 4 oz. cooked crabmeat pieces 4 oz. cooked shrimp, diced ¼ cup diced onions (about 1/3 of a medium-sized onion) ¼ cup diced green onions (about 4 stalks) 2 cloves garlic, minced ½ tsp. salt February 2010 • athometn.com | 87

food

¼ tsp. white pepper 1. Preheat oven to 325°.

2.Prepare pan by lining with parchment paper a 6-inch cheesecake or springform pan with 3-inch sides.

3. In a large mixer bowl, beat cream cheese on high speed for 3 minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition. Mix in flour.

4. With a rubber spatula, fold in crab, shrimp, onions, green onions, garlic, salt and white pepper.

5. Bake in preheated oven for 45 to 55 minutes or until the top is light brown and the center has a slight jiggle to it. Cool on a rack for 2 hours. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 6 hours before serving.

6. Serve with crackers and or fresh vegetables.

Variation: Use cooked lobster or scallops in place of the crabmeat.

Cheddar Garlic Crackers ½ c. butter 8 oz. cheddar cheese, grated 1 ½ c. flour 1 tsp. salt ½ roast garlic puree 1. Cream butter , add the cheese and mix well.

2. Add the flour and salt. Mix well.

3. Blend in the garlic and roll out into 3 logs, about 1 in diameter. Chill at least one hour.

4. Cut into inch slices and place on parchment paper-lined cookie sheet.

5. Bake at 350° until crisp.

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food

About L’École Culinaire L’École Culinaire is a postsecondary culinary arts school in Memphis. Along with its sister campus in St. Louis, L’École Culinaire focuses on producing first-rate culinary graduates with exceptional backgrounds in baking and pastry making, as well as a thorough knowledge of the hospitality industry, food and beverage management. Unlike many other culinary schools, L’École Culinaire uses a unique curricular structure based on 10-week educational blocks as opposed to the more traditional semesters or quarters. This allows the students to focus solely on their chosen field, as they take only one major course during the 10-week period. With its strong curriculum and outstanding level of instruction, L’École Culinaire has created a tradition of excellence in its students.

For more information on L’École Culinaire call 888.214.1352.

-Katja Zurcher February 2010 • athometn.com | 89

finance

Budgeting the Big Day Don’t let the stress of budgeting a wedding ruin the excitement of planning the big day. Here, Angela Dacus of Southern Event Planners in Bartlett discusses how to divide the budget and provides insider tips for the thrifty bride. PHOTO courtesy of dreamstime.com

W

hile many wedding budgets are pre-divided, each couple is different, says Angela Dacus, of Southern Event Planners in Bartlett. The bride and groom should sit down and determine which aspects of the event are the most important to them and discuss their expectations before allotting specific percentages of the budget. “No two brides want the same things,” Angela explains. “Therefore, no two budgets are the same.”

And remember, when dealing with the budget, be realistic— “Don’t ask your friend what she spent,” Angela says. “Her wedding probably isn’t the same as what you want.”

You’ll likely be working with a variety of different vendors when planning the ceremony and reception, so keep in mind that the event doesn’t end when the newlywed couple exits. It is standard to tip vendors about 10-20 percent of the fee, but Angela suggests basing this on the quality of service. “We always advise our clients to provide tips to vendors that have exceeded your expectations, gone over and above,” she says. “A vendor that created an extra centerpiece or floral arrangement at the last minute, on-site or comes back up to bring you something that you have asked for in the 12th hour—those are the things that are tip-worthy.”

Thrifty Tips Recycle Check with florists or caterers for leftover votive candles that they can include free of charge. “Candles always make an impact but can be more costly than most people think,” Angela says. “Most of the pre-filled wax votives burn for 12 hours so they can be used at least two to three times.”

Take the (Cup) Cake Substituting cupcakes for a traditional cake is becoming more and more common and can save anywhere from $1 to $4.50 a person for cake. “I have never heard a guest say, ‘Gee, I wish they had a wedding cake over cupcakes,’” Angela says.

Forget Favors “Wedding favors can be a complete waste of money, and at the end of the night we always pack up tons,” Angela says.

B.Y.O.B. If you are serving alcohol at the reception, choosing a venue where you can supply your own can save thousands.

Ditch the DJ “DJs are going to hate me for saying this, but a great way to save money is creating a playlist on your iPod to play for cocktail time or dinner music,” Angela suggests.

Seasonal Decor Choosing flowers that are in-season will save you tons, according to Angela. New trends include incorporating fewer flowers and more decorative pieces for tablescapes.

90 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

Buffet vs. Sit-Down Dinner It is possible for a seated dinner to be more cost-effective than a buffet. The servings are portioned out with a seated dinner, where with a buffet the caterer has to prepare more. A buffet will give a variety for your guests. It also creates more interaction for the guests.

Traditional vs. Trendy Trendy weddings are fun and cute, but in 10 years they will look dated. Traditional weddings are timeless and will never look dated.

With traditional weddings, you need to find ways to incorporate your personality to keep the wedding memorable.

Keeping Your Dress vs. Trashing Your Dress How about recycling the dress?

Short Dress vs. Long Dress What about a dress that is long for the ceremony with a bottom that tears away to reveal a short reception dress? Designers are coming up with great ideas that are cost conscious.

Traditional Vows vs. Writing Your Own Rarely do we have couples write their own. I would, but most don’t.

Outdoor vs. Indoor Weddings Outdoor weddings are great because you can create the space from a blank slate. Indoor weddings give you peace of mind with the ever-changing Tennessee weather.

Interview with Author Matt Moore Photography by Matt Barnett

book review

Photography by Paige Rumore

Have Her Over for Dinner Last Resort Press, February 2009 (regionally) TEXT Andrew Abernathy

Less can be more when it comes to honing your kitchen skills—especially for men with a background dedicated to Ramen noodles and TV dinner consumption. But,if you’re interested in moving beyond the microwave to embrace your inner foodie, Have Her Over for Dinner by Matt Moore, a startup cookbook for men, presents an entertaining and informative guide that will have you cooking simple-yet-impressive morsels in no time.

The concept is simple: All the meals in the book can be prepared with only a handful of quality ingredients which can be purchased at nearly any grocery store. As Moore notes, “great ingredients speak for themselves. As men, we too often try and shoot for the max whether it is a workout plan or our career goals— but that’s the thing that can get you in trouble in the kitchen, you don’t have to manipulate good ingredients too much to pull off a great meal.”

Wow your loved ones, or perhaps your next hot date, with a menu that sounds impressive and tastes great. How about a house salad with homemade red wine vinaigrette, followed by stuffed mushrooms topped with tantalizing, melted Parmigiano Reggiano, leading up to a bone-in pork chop served on a colorful medley of roasted vegetables? Now that’s a meal that leaves an impression.

92 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

At Home Tennessee: So what inspired you to write Have Her Over for Dinner?

Matt Moore: It started off as a complaint to a friend of mine. We were riding around and I get a message from a friend looking for an easy recipe. It’s always dangerous when a guy asks for a recipe— especially when they don’t know what they are doing—because it comes with requirements; you want to have five or less ingredients, you need to be able to get everything at the same store. So I turned to my friend and I said ‘one of these days I am going to make money off of this and instead of writing all of these e-mails, I’m going to write a book.’ What was initially a joke turned into the book.

AHT: Where do your recipes come from?

MM: A lot of them come from family recipes. My mother and grandmother are wonderful cooks, so I wouldn’t be completely honest if I didn’t say that a lot of it was based on their creations; other recipes were just things that I developed over the years for different guys. I had to simplify some of it for guys who have no experience in the kitchen whatsoever—the book progresses from simple to complex.

It starts out with simple pastas and then develops into things that require a little more technique. The goal was to use several different methods and food to take someone on a culinary journey.

AHT: Why do you think guys need a little extra help in the kitchen?

MM: I think a lot of times, guys have this impression that a lot of stuff is not prefaced with general knowledge that a lot of us didn’t grow up with. Families from the 1950s kind of got wrapped up in TV dinners and restaurants and there just hasn’t been a lot of home cooked meals. I am fortunate in that I grew up in a family where food was everything. When we’re eating breakfast we’re already thinking about what’s for dinner.

ATH: What’s next for you?

MM: Well, the name of this book was Have Her Over for Dinner, but the sequel is going to have to be named …And For Breakfast.

February 2010 • athometn.com | 93

happenings

February 2010 February 1-28

February 11-13

February 20

Gatlinburg Winter Magic

Antiques and Garden Show of

Horticultural Tour: The Zoo in

Gatlinburg

Nashville

Late Winter

800.568.4748

Nashville Convention Center

Memphis Zoo

eventsgatlinburg.com

615.352.9064

901.333.6765

antiquesandgardenshow.com

memphiszoo.org

Music City Soul Series

February 12

February 20

Nashville Convention and Visitors

Champagne and Truffles

5th Annual Antique Appraisal

Bureau

The Factory in Franklin

Fair and Show

615.256.2727

615.969.0064

Greeneville

visitmusiccity.com

epitourean.com

423.638.4111

February 1-28

February 4-21 Oedipus Rex Clarence Brown Theatre Knoxville 865.974.5161 clarencebrowntheatre.com

greenecountypartnership.com February 14 St. Valentine’s Day Dinner

February 25

Harrow Road Café

$29 & Under Wine Auction

Rugby

Nashville

888.214.3400

615.329.1760

historicrugby.org

localwineevents.com

February 4-7

February 26-28

Winter Heritage Festival in the

February 14

Antiques Show

Smokies

Valentine Dinner Dance

Houston Museum of Decorative

Townsend

DelMonaco Winery and Vine-

Arts

800.525.6834

yards

423.267.7176

smokymoutains.org

931.858.1177

thehoustonmuseum.com

February 5 Valentine’s Dinner Memphis Zoo 901.333.6572 memphiszoo.org

delmonacowinery.com February 26-28 February 14

Antiques on the Mountain

DeeDee Bridgewater: “Lady

Crossville

Day” Music of Billie Holiday

931.456.5035

Germantown Performing Arts

antiquesonthemountain.com

February 5-21

Center

Our Town

901.751.7500

February 27

Chattanooga Theatre Centre

gpacweb.com

IRIS Orchestra

February 19-21

Germantown Performing Arts

Dogwood Arts House and Garden

Center

February 7

Show

901.751.7500

Memphis Symphony Orchestra:

Knoxville Convention Center

gpacweb.com

Rachmaninoff Piano Concert

865.246.4398

No. 2

dogwoodarts.com

Germantown Performing Arts

February 20

Memphis Zoo

Center

Soweto Gospel Choir

901.333.6572

901.751.7500

Germantown Performing Arts

memphiszoo.org

gpacweb.com

Center

423.267.8534 theatrecenter.com

Anna’s Closet

901.751.7500 gpacweb.com

94 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

February 27 International Polar Bear Day

In 2005, St. Agnes Academy student Anna Menkel passed away in a car accident. In honor of their lost friend, a committee of St. Agnes students established an annual fundraiser called Anna’s Closet. Now in its second year, the fundraiser collects dresses from around the city of Memphis and sells them, both new and second-hand, for $10 each. The proceeds will be given to the Emmanuel Center of Memphis to benefit young women in the community, and any remaining dresses will be donated to charity.

-Katja Zurcher

February 27 St. Agnes Academy, Memphis 901.767.1377

February 2010 • athometn.com | 95

sources 44 Atop the Mountain Inn at Half-Mile Farm, Highlands, North Carolina, 828.526.8170, innathalfmilefarm.com 48 Chocolate-Covered Tradition Dinstuhl’s Fine Candies, Memphis, 901.377.2639, dinstuhls.com 50 It’s All in the Mix Builder—Albertine Company, Memphis, 901.751.7077, albertineco.com Interior Designer—Teresa Davis Allied ASID, Germantown, 901.529.7670, post31interiors.com Rugs—Heavenly Rugs, Germantown, 901.755.4646 Artwork—Katheryn Abernathy, Oxford, Mississippi, kathrynabernathyart.com 72 Flower Focus Holliday Flowers, Memphis, 901.753.2400, hollidayflowers.com, 90 Budgeting the Big Day Southern Event Planners, Bartlett, 901.757.9339, southerneventplanners.com

February 2010 • athometn.com | 97

essay

Older and Wiser?

Dianne Tant of Franklin shares her advice on marriage, love and life.

TEXT Dianne Tant eople ask my husband and me all the time how we have stayed happily married for so many years.

One reason is very simple: divorce was never an option for us. I guess we learned this attitude from our parents and their faith. What you believe about things in life—where your faith is—is so critical to being united. Now, that does not mean you will never have thoughts about separation or divorce, but your value system and your faith will sustain you (and counseling, if needed.)

Of course this is much easier if you cultivate good communication with each other. We had none. Read books about it, talk to older couples, talk to counselors—do whatever it takes to understand how to really communicate with each other. Good communication involves so much more than just sitting down and discussing the day.

My husband and I have now been married for 42 years—below are a few things I’ve learned and wish I had known before and during our marriage.

P

Learn to cook—at least a little When we married, circa 1968, I could only make spaghetti, but boy could I “decorate” the table and kitchen. As it turned out, my husband was more interested in eating! In today’s culture, I would take cooking classes. Of course by now, 42 years later, I can cook quite well, thank you, but I wish I had had Food Network back in the day. (Although I probably would not have had much time to watch while raising four kids.)

98 | At Home Tennessee • February 2010

Consider counseling I wish we had gotten pre-marital counseling before the wedding. It was not a popular practice in the 1960s. There are many topics addressed in these classes that are important, but my fiancé and I just thought “everything will work out fine.”

Ask the hard questions Be sure to discuss things with your fiancé before the wedding like money, parenting, sharing (of the work load, etc.) before it becomes an argument or wedge in the relationship.

What’s mine is yours Always share in the budgeting, buying groceries, cooking and cleaning (though it will not be 50-50, ever) due to changing circumstances like who has a full-time job.

Conquer conflicts If you (or he) have trouble with conflict resolution, get into therapy now. Two passive aggressive people don’t do too well together without this.

Learn a new language Know what each of your love languages is. This is where you can eliminate so much frustration. For example, I want him to repair the house (an act of service) and he just wants to snuggle (affectionate touch). Knowing these things in our temperaments will help us live and love much more peacefully.

Be open Do not hide your feelings and emotions and do not use them as a weapon. If you do, you’ll be sorry.

To each his own Do not discuss anything private about your marriage with your parents. If his parents treat you badly, let him handle them, not you (and vice versa).

Live in the real world Do not have unrealistic expectations of each other.

I thought he would take out the trash without being asked, he thought I would be romantic all the time—not so much, but you can get there eventually.

Grow together You will not change him, but you can grow in grace and mercy together. Your tastes will change, your bodies will change, your circumstances will change. Build your faith together, not apart.

All you need is love Just love each other and don’t overanalyze everything too much. Take time to spend together. Enjoy your strengths, embrace your weaknesses and love each other as if you really matter.

Don’t forget that four-letter word Tell him that you love him—even if you really don’t right then.

(Oh, and one last thing— be more grateful for your mother! I wish I had been, for all the things my Mom did for us newly married, not to mention all the babysitting of her wonderful grandchildren. We ate dinner with her a lot—see the aforementioned note about cooking!)

Prioritize When babies come along, try to keep making him a priority. (I say “try” because I know about the exhaustion!)