October 2023

26 | HOME FEATURE

Piperton couple entrusts Caroline Lovelace of Lovelace Studios to create a glamorous family home on the water.

40 | DESIGN

Courtney Peters Interior Design oversees the beautification of the new Pi Beta Phi house at the University of Mississippi.

OCTOBER 2023 • VOL. 22 NO. 7

PUBLISHER / EDITORIAL DIRECTOR

MARGARET MONGER | mmonger@athomemms.com

MANAGING EDITOR

AUBREY ANN MONGER | aamonger@athomemms.com

GRAPHIC DESIGNER

GINNI JONES | gjones@athomemms.com

COPY EDITOR

TERRI GLAZER

IMAGING

COLOR MANAGEMENT

CHARLES REYNOLDS | cr@colorretouching.com

ADVERTISING

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE

HILARY FRANKEL | hafrankel@comcast.net

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

GAIL HARRELL | gharrell@athomemms.com

CHRIS PUGH | chrisapugh@gmail.com

BUSINESS

DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS

TRIP MONGER | tmonger@athomemms.com

MARKETING AND CIRCULATION

HARRIET W. DEATON | hdeaton@athomemms.com

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Thismonth begins the last quarter of the year: it’s prime season for football, the lower humidity brings me better hair days and the Halloween holiday gives me an excuse to keep candy around all month long.

I met my husband 40 years ago this October 22 and our first child, Callie, was born October 15th, 34 years ago, so there are many reasons for me to love October, not to mention the crisp, cool air and color everywhere. October has arrived indeed!

The vibrant colors are not only visible outdoors this fall. Color is finally coming back into our homes. Designer Caroline Lovelace’s clients, owners of this month’s featured home, were ready for a pop of color and turned to Caroline and her design firm for help. I, for one, am very happy to see this trend shifting from the white, gray and pale color palette of the past few years. Although the soft tones can be relaxing for some, many of us still crave color and the happiness it brings us.

As always, I hope you enjoy this issue! Not to quote a “cheesy” shirt or questionably bad wall art, but “Happy Fall Y’all!” No judgment on the shirts or wall art of course:)

- Margaret Monger, PUBLISHER

GLAMOUR on the lake

STORY BY TERRI GLAZER | DESIGN BY LOVELACE STUDIOS PHOTOGRAPHY BY SELAVIE PHOTOGRAPHY

Theconcepts of a glamorous home and a family home may seem mutually exclusive, but one Mid South couple was set on having both. They got their wish, with picturesque water views to boot, with the help of designer Caroline Lovelace.

Drs. Aditi Bagchi and Kaushal Kalra chose contractor Ken Garland to build their dream home in Piperton’s Twin Lakes community in 2021 and brought Lovelace in shortly after the architectural drawings were finalized to steer the design. With three guiding principles—to give the home cosmopolitan style, to facilitate entertaining large groups,

and to maximize views of the backyard pool and the lake that adjoins the property— Lovelace set out to create surroundings that would give the couple everything they desired. They moved in last year, only a week before their first baby was born.

“Every room in the house that’s important to them has an amazing lake view,” Lovelace says, “so taking advantage of that as much as possible told us how we needed to orient the furniture. These two love entertaining. They do it often and for large groups so they wanted lots of open space. And they wanted light and airy design, which came naturally with the tall ceilings.”

Lovelace understood the vibe the couple wanted immediately when she saw the sofa they requested for the living room. The curved sectional set the design tone for the living room, and ultimately for the entire project. “You might not expect to see it in a family home, but I think it feels really unique and special for a family to be able to have such an elevated sense of style, even with a toddler in the house,” Lovelace says.

The designer was thrilled when her clients mentioned that they wanted to incorporate bold color into their new home. “They were coming from a very neutral space, so to get to work with color was really exciting,” she recalls. “The living room wallpaper is one of my favorites I’ve ever used.” Lovelace and the couple quickly built a great rapport that gave them confidence to go along with some of her bold design decisions, including the choice of dark teal leather swivel chairs in the living room. “They trusted me on these and they look great. They really pull out the blue in the rug.”

The living room lacks two elements usually found in family gathering spaces: a television and decorative lighting. Both these omissions are by design. Bagchi and Kalra aren’t big TV watchers, so they told Lovelace they didn’t want one constantly visible. In a clever design hack, a drop-down projection screen is mounted into the living room ceiling to provide entertainment when needed, then disappear. Its projector is also hidden discreetly. Had Lovelace placed a chandelier in the space it would have blocked the view when the TV is in use, as well as that of the lake from the living room’s wall of fulllength windows. Instead, she opted for LED rope lighting recessed into the ceiling.

incontrast,

twin brass and black light fixtures above the adjacent kitchen island add an element of drama. Lovelace explains, “They wanted something statement making, so we went with the oversized lighting. It makes a big impact in the room.”

Because the homeowners love to cook and use their kitchen frequently, Lovelace paid special attention to blending function with form in its design. Thoughtful features like the quartz countertops, a quartz sink, which she says is practically indestructible, a touchsensor faucet and a drawer that transforms into a cutting board and sturdy mixer stand make the kitchen the ultimate in user friendly. The stunning metal vent hood, Audrey Lane

tile backsplashes and gold-veined mirror fronts on the bar cabinet doors bring sophistication. Lovelace says the gilded treatment on the cabinet doors not only provides the bling Bagchi loves, but also reflects the beautiful lake view in a unique way.

Just off the kitchen, the home’s single dining area is anchored by a large oval table in dark wood. Curved-back chairs in moody blue velvet soften the tone and reprise the elliptical line of the table. In contrast, a squared-off banquette adds an angular touch. Its upholstery repeats the marigold tones of the living room wallpaper. The window wall shows off the lake view and can also open fully onto the screen porch when Bagchi and Kalra want guests to have room outdoors as well as in.

theroom originally conceived as the dining room in the house plans takes a different role in this home, serving as the family’s puja mandir, or home temple. One of Garland’s carpenters constructed two exceptional additions to the sacred space. On either side of the cased opening from the entryway he constructed custom backlit built-ins, each with 24 square compartments. Some are covered with lotus symbols, while others hold small green plants or other meaningful items. Lovelace says her clients wanted a special place to worship in their home and the built-ins were “critical to making it feel really intentional.”

In the primary bedroom Lovelace took the charisma up a notch, giving Bagchi and Kalra a lustrous, silvery retreat. Again, the couple eschewed the idea of a TV. Neither did they need a dresser, as their huge custom closet has plenty of room for all their clothing. The designer took advantage of the substantial open wall across from the bed to add dimensional art. Working with metallic and white components from Gold Leaf Design Group’s Wall Play collection, installer Chuck Bogan brought Lovelace’s artistic concept into being. “Water was the theme,” she says. “We wanted it to look almost like a crashing wave.”

The custom headboard is the focal point on the opposite wall. The straight lines of its channel tufting play well with the stylized ovals in the wallpaper. From the shiny dandelion chandelier to the faux fur accent pillows to the silverized wood nightstands, everything in the room exudes glamour.

If the bedroom shouts luxury, the primary bath whispers it with a bright, airy feel. White vessel sinks, countertops and cabinets accented with chrome hardware create a clean, fresh look. Lovelace seamlessly worked in two outof-the-ordinary features her clients designated as must haves: a refrigerator drawer for the skincare products Bagchi likes to keep chilled, and a smart mirror that can display the time, weather conditions and more when enabled. Lovelace’s design cleverly embedded that device in the large bank of mirrors that spans the entire wall so that it blends in perfectly when not in use.

twofactors make it obvious that the upstairs home gym is important to Bagchi: it has a sweeping lake view, and it’s full of color. “Aditi wanted something that would motivate her to come up and work out in the gym,” says Lovelace. The designer obliged with wallpaper from Mable Originals that is an explosion of color and energy. And because no room in this house would be complete without a touch of bling, an artist applied accents of gold leaf to the wall covering by hand.

Lovelace, who launched Lovelace Studios last year after almost a decade cutting her design teeth on the staff of local firm Murphy Maude, says bright color is back in the decor world. “I’m doing a lot of color right now. A lot of color. People are dying for color. Everything was gray for so long! It’s time for something fresh.”

The polished and urbane home Lovelace created for her happy clients bears out the fact that color, bling and family can successfully coexist after all.

AHOME FOR THE GIRLS

STORY

GLAZER

BY TERRI

| DESIGN BY COURTNEY PETERS INTERIOR DESIGN

PHOTOGRAPHY BY TOM BECK OF BECK PHOTO

AS IT HAS AT MANY STATE UNIVERSITIES, enrollment

at the University of Mississippi has skyrocketed recently, almost doubling in the past 20 years. With the overall student population increase, it would stand to reason that the membership in campus Greek organizations would also grow. This has certainly been the case for Pi Beta Phi Fraternity for Women at Ole Miss—in fact, the group had become so large that the chapter room at their campus sorority house could no longer hold all the members for meetings.

Members of the alumnae corporation board that oversees the house realized the need for an expansion several years ago. After much planning, fundraising, and a brief pause thanks to COVID, the project was completed earlier this year. And what a project it was! The effort added a whopping 19,000 square feet to the back side of the multi-story structure, enlarging the dining room and kitchen, doubling the size of the chapter room, and creating a new rear foyer, house director’s suite, officer workspaces, additional gathering spaces and a large TV/study room.

Pi Beta Phi Corporation Board member Gail Collins says the group enlisted Jackson, MS-based designer Courtney Peters to guide the decor of the new spaces, as well as a refresh of the house’s existing common areas.

A poll of the chapter’s active members revealed the girls’ top priority for their campus home: continuity of design, with a cohesive palette and concept that would flow from space to space. Peters delivered, using the sorority’s colors, wine and silver blue, as her starting point. She recalls, “The first thing I selected was a floral fabric to upholster chairs in the living room. It had those colors as well as a lot of others I could pull from. I started with that and branched off of it from there, using icier colors in the dining area.”

ART BY COURTNEY PETERS

In the more casual rooms Peters paired the light blue with a broader variation of colors, including a fun pink in the new TV/study space. The mixed-use configuration of the room is perfect for college students. There’s a large television surrounded by a trio of comfy sofas, as well as tables and chairs for a casual meal or a study group. Pop art and punchy accent fabrics give the area a youthful vibe. Knowing the girls would use the space daily, she kept durability in mind, opting for commercial-grade fabrics and easy-clean vinyl to keep the look clean and cool.

In a tasteful nod to one of the sorority’s symbols, arrows appear throughout the house. From accessories Peters placed on bookshelves, to wooden detailing on a buffet, to the exterior door pulls designed by Mills & Mills Architects, to the custom wroughtiron railing on the main staircase, a gift from an alumna in memory of her mother, meaningful emblems remind the members of their common bond.

Collins says the corporation board was pleased with the way the house’s new design used existing furniture in the formal, common areas. To stay within budget, Peters recovered upholstered pieces and reincorporated case goods to create a fresh look that respects tradition with a light, new feel.

Art was another important element in the decor. Again, Peters’ design plan kept pieces the sorority already owned. Added works in the original parts of the house and in newly constructed areas are relevant to the setting—most were painted by either an alumna or a Mississippi artist, and several depict angels, another Pi Phi symbol.

Collins worked closely with Peters throughout the three-year project and admits they were both nervous and excited when the job was finished and the chapter invited all its alumnae to attend the dedication. “It felt like our baby and we so wanted everyone to love it as much as we do,” she says. “I heard nothing but positive comments.”

“And the girls were so excited,” adds Peters. “That really felt good, seeing that they genuinely like it.”

SINCE

2017 Courtney Peters has owned and operated Courtney Peters Interior Design, a full-service design studio and home decor boutique in the Jackson, MS, area. Her store’s location is famous for having been the home of Jim Westerfield Antiques for many years. Peters received a BA degree in art from Ole Miss and continued her course work in interior design at Mississippi College after graduation. Her work is known for its timeless, airy appeal and approachable elegance.

ART BY LIZ NICHOLS

START A NEW TRADITION THIS YEAR...

“DECK THE HALLS” IN PARADISE

TEXT AND PHOTOS COURTESY OF BARBARA MAY, OWNER OF TRAVEL LEADERS

AS THE SEASON GETS CLOSER

it’s time for families to start discussing the holidays. Have you figured out who will host this year? Is it you? Are relatives coming to stay? Do you have enough room for everyone? Will you put up the tree, cook the turkey and spend endless hours trying to get the house ready, only to watch it be destroyed within minutes of your family’s arrival?

Families usually want to spend the holidays with each other, but if the group is large and spread out geographically, it can be difficult and stressful to bring everyone together.

An extended family vacation can be a great alternative. A recent survey asked adults and children alike whether they could recall every Christmas gift they received. The answer was almost always no, but it’s a sure bet everyone would remember for years to come the Christmas when the family went on a trip. Being on vacation makes Christmas easy. No cooking or cleaning, no decorating a tree, no figuring out where everyone is going to sleep, and everyone gets to have their own space!

One of the easiest trips to plan for a family is a cruise. The group only has three decisions to make—destination, date and cruise line— and a cruise can accommodate the entire family, young and old, near and far. Once on board the ship, family members can be as active or as relaxed as they wish, stay together or venture out independently, and it’s easy for grandparents to have plenty of one-on-one time with the grandchildren in a unique setting.

ROYAL CARIBBEAN

loves the Christmas season, and guests see that reflected in everything they do. Every ship is entirely decked out in red and green decor and a merry tree-lighting event makes the winter wonderland feel complete. Families with kids will love the many crafts and activities throughout the journey to keep the little ones happy. Children can even send letters straight to the North Pole!

Adult passengers will also enjoy themed nights and activities. Test your knowledge during a fun trivia contest or race with your team to complete a scavenger hunt. Of course, no December is complete without an Ugly Sweater Party—there will be one of those, too. Feel right at home with the merriment of the season during your holiday cruise.

Looking forward to Christmas dinner? Royal Caribbean takes pride in all of the meals, snacks and drinks served aboard every ship, and none more so than the extravagant feast its chefs prepare to commemorate this special occasion. While the cuisine is amazing, the best part might be the chance to enjoy a delicious dinner with your family without having to plan or cook any of it.

One of the best things about a Royal Caribbean cruise is the ports of call; tropical islands where the skies are always blue and the waters are crystal clear. Cruising over the holidays can create a new family tradition that combines Christmas festivities and fun experiences in different locations.

If cruising isn’t right for your group, why not consider soaking up the sun at an all-inclusive resort for the holidays?

The Caribbean has holiday spirit, plus warm weather and glistening water. A resort Christmas vacation allows kids to swap sleds and snow boots for snorkels and paddle boards, and adults to relax while the children play in the sand and surf. All food, beverages, activities and entertainment are included.

The Beaches Resorts in Jamaica and Turks and Caicos offer a variety of amenities and activities for guests of all ages during the Christmas season, making them perfect for multigenerational family gatherings. Beautifully adorned with twinkling lights, ornaments and holiday-themed decorations, the resorts’ atmosphere is absolutely festive. Weekly agendas during the season include special events and parties for all ages: everything from tree lighting ceremonies and holiday-themed shows to parades and appearances by Santa himself. Guests can enjoy festive meals at all of the on-site restaurants thanks to Beaches’ special menus featuring traditional holiday dishes as well as local flavors. Beaches Resorts provide a wide range of water sports and waterslides for all ages. The adults may even want to slip away to indulge in a spa treatment with a holiday-themed twist.

IS A SNOWY HOLIDAY VACATION RIGHT FOR YOUR FAMILY?

Aspen, CO, is famous for its storybook winter experience. It’s known for excellent ski slopes and charming Christmas atmosphere and stunning Rocky Mountain views.

Aspen transforms into a winter wonderland during Christmas. Ice skate at the Silver Circle Ice Rink or the Aspen Ice Garden, take a sleigh ride through the snow-covered landscape, or explore the area on a snowshoeing or cross-country skiing adventure. Its charming streets are lined with boutique shops and galleries perfect for shopping.

No visit to Aspen is complete without a trip to the natural hot springs in nearby Glenwood Springs. Soaking and relaxing in the warm waters while surrounded by snow is an experience your family won’t soon forget.

What about a visit to the European Christmas markets?

Cities like Prague, Vienna, Munich and Strasbourg are home to delightful Christmas markets that offer festive decorations, traditional foods and unique gifts. A river cruise is a great way to experience this enchanting European holiday tradition while taking in the beauty of winter landscapes and charming towns along the riverbanks. The sight of snow-covered countryside and historic architecture can create a magical atmosphere.

Christmas is a special time for loved ones to come together. It affords a rare opportunity to build unique memories that you’ll talk about for years to come. Start a new tradition this year by celebrating the joy of the season in paradise.

For more information on planning a Christmas vacation, contact Travel Leaders at 901.377.6600 or 901.853.6200 or visit www.gotravelleaders.com.

Offices, open by appointment only, are located at 2765 Wolf Creek Pkwy., Ste. 104, Memphis, and 155 N Main St., Ste. 101A, Collierville.

THE GIFT OF TRAVEL...

Is the perfect gift for a loved one who has everything. Travel gift certificates can be the most memorable and cherished gift ever; they make possible an experience that will create memories to last a lifetime. This is the gift that will never be lost, exchanged or forgotten. It will live on through family photos, videos and storytelling for years to come.

ChristmasChickasawat

F ind new, one-of-a-kind holiday decor.

H elp a worthy organization. V isit a charming marketplace.

S hop local businesses.

If your current to-do list looks anything like this, you’ll be able to check it all off in one stop next month. The merchants at Chickasaw Oaks are sponsoring Christmas at Chickasaw, a designer decorated tree fundraiser, with proceeds benefiting Binghampton Christian Academy.

Artists, designers and groups from across the Mid South will sponsor a Christmas tree or other holiday item decorated in their signature style. The works of art will be on display inside Chickasaw Oaks starting Sun., Nov. 5, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., during the plaza’s holiday open house. The afternoon will include live music, featuring a performance by the BCA choir, photos with Santa, and special treats. Plaza shops will offer door prizes and vendors will be in the atrium amidst the trees for the event.

Throughout the month shoppers can view the trees and place bids on the silent auction to have one (or more!) for their own. Winners will be announced on Sat., Nov. 25 during the center’s Small Business Saturday celebration.

STORY

BY TERRI GLAZER

PHOTOGRAPHY BY KATIE BARBER

“We are expecting to see traditional evergreens, flocked pencil trees, unique shaped plywood trees and other creative concepts like treeshaped pillows and hand-painted ornaments,” says Vanessa West, chair of the event. West owns Avenue Wrapping, a gift wrapping service and gift shop located in the plaza. Trees decorated by Chickasaw Oaks anchor store Lisa Mallory Interior Design, Maggie Clarke Interiors, Elizabeth Malmo Interior Design, Penn Home & Design, and Paint Memphis will be among the offerings.

West explains that the merchants hope to make the event an annual tradition, and want the funds raised to stay in the nearby neighborhood. Less than half a mile from the shopping center, Binghampton Christian Academy is a private Christian day and boarding school that serves high-need and at-risk students in grades K4-8 from the surrounding area. All 140 students attend the school on full scholarship. Now in its 31st year, BCA receives 94 percent of its funding from individuals, churches and charitable organizations.

Along with a dedicated staff and faculty, the school relies on a network of committed volunteers to tutor and mentor the students, especially the 30 who board on campus every Monday through Friday during the academic year. “[The boarding students] get a wellrounded experience and they have wonderful Christian dorm parents who give them a lot of structure they need to grow and thrive,” says Shelley Alley, BCA director of development and communications. “When these children enter the classroom in the morning they’re prepared to do their job, which is to learn.”

Shrimp Casserole

Recipe Courtesy of Margaret Monger

OCTOBER OF 1983, I WAS A FRESHMAN AT OLE MISS. I MET THIS HANDSOME GUY WHO COULD COOK AND I COULD NOT! I WENT TO THE CAMPUS BOOKSTORE, BOUGHT MY FIRST COOKBOOK, BEST OF THE BEST FROM MISSISSIPPI , AND QUICKLY FOUND SEVERAL RECIPES THAT WERE EASY ENOUGH FOR THIS AMATEUR. ONE IN PARTICULAR HAS TURNED OUT TO BE ONE OF OUR FAVORITES THAT WE HAVE ENJOYED FOR 40 YEARS THIS OCTOBER! AFTER ALL, THE WAY TO A MAN’S HEART STARTS WITH HIS STOMACH :)

SHRIMP CASSEROLE

1.5 POUNDS FRESH SHRIMP, PEELED AND DEVEINED (I USE LARGE 12-15 COUNT)

1 PACKAGE DRY ITALIAN SALAD DRESSING MIX

1 CUP WATER

½ CUP GRATED PARMESAN CHEESE

1 STICK BUTTER

6 OUNCES ANGEL HAIR PASTA, COOKED AND DRAINED

PUT THE SHRIMP IN A 3-QUART CASSEROLE DISH. SPRINKLE THE SALAD DRESSING MIX AND PARMESAN CHEESE OVER THE SHRIMP AND POUR THE WATER OVER THE TOP. CUT UP THE BUTTER AND PLACE OVER THE SHRIMP MIXTURE. COVER WITH FOIL AND BAKE AT 450˚ FOR 10 MINUTES, THEN LOWER HEAT TO 350˚ AND COOK FOR ANOTHER 10-15 MINUTES OR UNTIL DONE. SERVE OVER THE ANGEL HAIR PASTA AND WITH PLENTY OF GOOD GRILLED OR TOASTED BREAD TO SOAK UP THE SAUCE!

Domestic Violence

I WALK INTO A ROOM FILLED WITH SMILING YOUNG WOMEN EAGER TO HEAR TIDBITS FROM FEMALE PROFESSIONALS 20 TO 30 YEARS THEIR SENIOR. MY DRESS STYLE IS WELL PUT TOGETHER, AND I PRESENT AN APPROACHABLE CONFIDENCE. I’VE BEEN ASKED TO PARTICIPATE AS A PANELIST AND SHARE INSIGHT GAINED IN BECOMING AN EMPOWERED WOMAN.

By all appearances, I am a woman who has it all figured out and hasn’t too much to worry about. It’s as if life has been a breeze and I am one of the lucky ones who has skirted through unscathed.

I’m asked the question, “What is the one thing you would tell your younger version?” Before I answer, I share a little background. I married my childhood sweetheart as I entered adulthood. Except, he wasn’t really a sweetheart. I was too scared to let him go, but I was equally frightened to be with him. That was the scariest time of my life. Three and half years and two small children later, I was finally more scared to be with him than without.

In hindsight, I recognize the signs were there while we were dating, and my experience isn’t isolated. In fact, proven statistics shed light on how prevalent such situations are. According to the national statistics on teen dating abuse, one in 12 experiences physical dating violence. I wasn’t a victim of physical violence while dating; my experience included verbal aggression and emotional abuse. Like most people, I didn’t recognize those types of assault as abuse. Once we were married, the abuse escalated. There was more verbal abuse, emotional abuse intensified, and physical violence became part of the cycle.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, almost half of all women in the US have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner, and one in four women (24.3 percent) over 18 has been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner. In 2017, The United States Office on Drugs and Crime reported 50,000 women called home “the most dangerous place.” While it is recognized that men can be victims as well, about 85 percent of intimate partner violence victims are women and girls.

Intimate partner violence, also known as domestic violence, occurs in an intimate or romantic relationship when one partner uses abuse to gain power and control over the other. The pattern is usually experienced in a cycle of tension building, explosion and then a honeymoon phase, over and over.

STORY MICHELLE JOHNS MA, LPC-MHSP (TEMP), NCC, 200 HR E-RTY, 500 HR RYT

MAIN TYPES OF ABUSE

Physical abuse is the use of physical force either with a body part or an object in a manner that injures or endangers another person. (*Note, endangering is as substantial as injuring.) Victims have a tendency to minimize minor injuries. Abuse by strangulation dramatically increases the likelihood of death to a victim. In the event of strangulation, the victim should be seen by a physician immediately. Many times, external evidence does not reveal the depths of the internal injuries.

Emotional abuse includes verbal and psychological abuse such as threats of violence or other repercussions, yelling, belittling, name-calling, intimidation, shaming, blaming and controlling techniques to wield power and control.

Financial abuse includes withholding, restricting and preventing access to financial gain. It also includes making the victim account for every cent spent. Examples may include making the victim live on an allowance and closely monitoring how it is spent, demanding receipts for purchases, depositing the victim’s paycheck into an account only the abuser can access, preventing the victim from viewing or accessing bank accounts, preventing the victim from working, limiting the hours the victim can work, getting the victim fired, or forcing the victim to work certain types of jobs.

Stalking includes unwanted acts of following, harassing and watching the victim. Examples may include showing up at the victim’s home or workplace unannounced or uninvited, sending unwanted texts, messages, letters, emails or voicemails, leaving unwanted items, gifts or flowers.

Leaving is not as simple as most would believe. It’s hard because the person abusing you is a person you love or loved, a person with whom you may share children. Leaving might seem impossible financially. Women,

especially those with children, may not have a place to go. When I decided to leave my abusive relationship, I was not sure where I was going. I planned for three places, the home of my dad and step-mom, a shelter, or my car. Thankfully, my dad was willing to help me. If he hadn’t, I am not sure I would have lasted in a shelter or my car for very long.

Once a woman decides to leave, she is at the mercy of the court to believe her story. If she is successful in getting an order of protection, it is a piece of paper, not a guarantee her abuser won’t continue to threaten her or take action. If she shares children with the abuser, the victim must continue to interact with him. There is no end date for victims of domestic violence, even when they manage to break free. The emotional aftermath of post-traumatic stress disorder tends to linger for many years. My head was on a swivel for at least a decade after I left my abuser. It is not without warrant to note that we spend far more time asking why a victim stays and educating women on violence than we do asking why men abuse and educating them on ways to change their abusive behavior.

There is so much more I should and could write, but I am out of space. If you want more information about domestic violence and resources to help yourself or someone you know, please reach out to me at mjohns@ transforming-wellness.com . Don’t be afraid to ask questions if you think someone you know is being abused.

While I am not significantly special regarding being a victim of intimate partner violence, I am significantly special in having left the situation and survived. For that I am eternally grateful to God and the family and friends who supported me along the way. As for my answer to that question about advice for younger me, I would tell her to tune in and take heed to signs and signals coming from her body and brain. I would tell her to slow down, pray a little more and trust God a lot more!

REBUILD… Your Life 360

As I read every issue of At Home magazine I am constantly amazed by the motivational and inspirational stories of finding new spaces in which to live, rebuilding current spaces and visualizing a dream home.

Although I am not an architect in the professional sense, I do play the architect of my patients’ health, helping them frame the foundation for their lives and health—360.

—Frank Lloyd Wright

Frank Lloyd Wright, one of the greatest architects and visionaries of the 20th century, believed in creating environments that were both functional and beautiful. He focused not only on a building’s appearance, but also on how it would enrich the lives of the people inside it. That has been my philosophy since starting my medical career and eventually studying functional medicine, longevity and wellness. I also firmly believe in creating a better foundation for your life that eventually leads to your own personal “curb appeal.”

The foundation is the load-bearing portion of a building or ground upon which something is built. Your health also has a foundation. If your foundation is “cracked,” it can affect your entire life and decrease your longevity. A healthy lifestyle, as well as form and function, are wholly intertwined.

The elements of a healthy lifestyle are important to not only living long but also being healthy enough to enjoy your lifespan. We are growing older and living longer, but most of the time we are not growing healthier.

Just as a dream home requires the successful combination of concepts and materials, a long and healthy life involves many elements, combined properly.

Style: Everyone has a unique individual style when it comes to what you eat, how you move, and what works for you. However, your style, just like your eating and dietary habits, does change as you get older. Make changes toward healthy eating now!

Materials: Food is medicine and health revolves around what you eat. Clean and quality foods are the materials with which you’ll build your dream body. Intermittent fasting and eliminating cheap filler foods like sugar and starch are the keys to longevity.

Plumbing: High-quality materials are necessary for a reliable

plumbing system in a house, and clean food is vital to gut health, an important aspect of longevity. Make sure to consume prebiotics as well as probiotics. Eat more fiber and your plumbing will be great.

Balanced design: Your hormones need to be balanced in order to help with your “plumbing,” improve the quality of your “materials,” strengthen your overall “foundation,” and elevate your “style” to a new level.

Finishes: Everyone knows that as you age, your finishes need “refurbishing and maintenance” to keep up curb appeal. Use good-quality skin care so you don’t have to totally revamp later: start early and look great. Your inner health will also reflect on your “outer” health and looks.

Landscape: Surround yourself with positivity and beauty and you will feel better on the inside. Surround yourself with positive images of how you want to live your life.

Flow: Keep moving! I am a firm believer in “use it or lose it.” Once you stop moving, or any activity, you will lose it. That goes for EVERY part of your body—lungs, heart and sexual function.

“Form follows function—that has been misunderstood. Form and function should be one, joined in a spiritual union.”

“You have to go wholeheartedly into anything in order to achieve anything worth having.”

—Frank Lloyd Wright

Dr. Susan Murrmann

Text by Susan G. Murrmann, MD FACOG FAAMFM AMAARM |Photo by Tindall Farmer

SHOULD YOU BE WARY OF WEIGHT LOSS INJECTIONS?

Text By Allison White, Wellness MD Clinic Owner

According to the Centers for Disease Control, obesity rates in the United States continue to increase at an alarming rate. In fact, almost 60 percent of Americans are considered either overweight or obese. Obesityrelated conditions including heart disease, stroke, type 2 diabetes, and certain types of cancer are among the leading causes of preventable, premature death in the U.S. Thankfully, new treatment options are available to reverse this disease.

WHAT ARE THE INJECTIONS CALLED?

In 2021, the FDA approved the once-weekly injection WeGovy for chronic weight management. WeGovy is the brand name for semaglutide. The approval of this drug provides patients with an option to help curb appetite without the jittery effects of a stimulant. While it may seem like a brand-new drug, semaglutide has been used for years at a lower dosage, commonly known by the brand name Ozempic, to effectively treat type 2 diabetes.

Another alternative with typically fewer side effects is tirzepatide, known by the brand name Monjuaro. This treatment is also administered once weekly by injection and boasts even greater weight loss in studies. According to a recent study published in The New England Journal of Medicine , participants experienced a 19.5-20.9 percent reduction in body fat mass compared with participants receiving semaglutide, who averaged 12.4 percent loss.

ARE THE INJECTIONS SAFE?

While it is evident that these injections are effective, it is wise to consider the long-term risk vs. benefit. Many patients are prescribed these medications without being properly evaluated for potential adverse effects. A battery of specific lab tests and a thorough evaluation by a provider specifically trained in Obesity Medicine ensures patients’ safety while receiving treatment for obesity using the injections. Gastrointestinal issues (nausea, diarrhea and constipation) are the most commonly reported side effects. They typically resolve

once the body adjusts to the medication.

ARE THE RESULTS PERMANENT?

Long-term results vary based on the level of support a patient receives from their healthcare provider. Patients receiving proper nutritional counseling from their physician or health coach may experience long-term success in maintaining weight loss. However, if patients are left to make food choices on their own without proper guidance, the weight may return and result in greater fat mass than the patient reported prior to initiation of weight loss injections. Unfortunately, most physicians and mid-level providers receive little to no nutritional instruction during their training. This fact makes it even more important for patients to seek out a trained professional with expertise in Obesity Medicine.

In addition, it is crucial that a patient is evaluated for other underlying conditions. Many thyroid issues go undiagnosed due to inadequate lab and diagnostic evaluation by a knowledgeable healthcare provider. Male and female hormonal imbalances also play an important role in weight loss and long-term weight maintenance. Vitamin and mineral deficiencies, inadequate sleep, chronic inflammation, and unmanaged stress may affect weight and must be treated prior to initiation of any effective weight loss program.

Allison White & John W. White, Jr. MD

A SAFE, HIGH-TECH TREATMENT FOR DEPRESSION THAT WORKS

Do you or a loved one suffer from depression? What if you could effectively treat depression without drugs and feel better in just under two weeks? With the latest technology in transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), this is not a fantasy that is too good to be true. This is what Dr. Helen Ly has been seeing at her TMS clinic, Brain Body Balance TMS, since she started the practice in 2021.

A board-certified neurologist and a neuroscience major at Vanderbilt University, Dr. Ly was intrigued when she learned about a “brain therapy” that could treat mood and neurological conditions. Over the past three decades, TMS has been used as a proven psychiatric tool to treat major depressive disorder, or severe depression.

Approved by the FDA, TMS uses magnetic energy pulses to stimulate brain cells in a specific area in the front of the brain to treat depression. Anyone who does not have a pacemaker, implantable medical device or metal in the head can do TMS. It is not “shock therapy” or electroconvulsive therapy. The treatment does not require sedation or medication, and its effects are longlasting, depending on the severity and complexity of the depression.

Dr. Ly says she is excited about new protocols that cut the treatment time to just 10 days, compared to six weeks of near daily treatments with standard TMS, and reduce the average length of treatment sessions to only 15 minutes, half the time formerly required. The innovation, called theta burst stimulation (TBS), has been shown to produce similar if not greater effects on brain activity than standard TMS. The new protocol is also more comfortable: TBS mimics natural brain wave frequencies making it more tolerable and effective.

“The results for treating depression with TBS have been astounding,” says Dr. Ly. “It’s exhilarating seeing patients come out of depression and get their lives back.” Since she started offering TMS treatment for depression at her East Memphis clinic a little over two

years ago, the success rate is over 90 percent.

Dr. Ly also uses TMS to treat other neurobehavioral problems such as cognitive dysfunction (brain fog), post-concussion syndrome, poor quality sleep and post traumatic stress disorder.

Just two doors down the street, at 515 North Highland, Dr. Ly works alongside her sister, Dr. Amy Ly. They practice an integrative blend of general neurology and medical acupuncture. Founded by their father, Alexander Ly, CMD, LAc, in the late 1980s, the clinic is the oldest acupuncture practice in the Mid South.

Dr. Ly is quick to point out the common thread in the different facets of her practice. “TMS made sense to me because its treatment approach is surprisingly similar to that of acupuncture: restoring balance and functionality. Of course, one is cutting-edge and is 30 years old and the other is a healing art that is 3,000 years old, but both focus on modulating or ‘resetting’ your system.”

**For more information about Brain Body Balance TMS, please visit www.IHAclinic.com.

Dr. Amy Ly and Dr. Helen Ly

COSMETIC SURGERY VS. NON-SURGICAL TREATMENTS: WHICH IS BEST?

In today’s digital world many people use Instagram, TikTok and other web resources to compare surgical or non-surgical options for improvements to the face, breasts, body or skin. Sometimes this information helps, but it can be confusing.

Plastic surgery clinics often see patients who have previously undergone non-surgical treatments without investigating the surgical options. While internet marketing might make non-surgical options seem less costly and just as effective as surgery, that is not always the case. For instance, we have seen many patients who have spent thousands of dollars and undergone substantial discomfort attempting to use nonsurgical treatments to tighten sagging facial tissue, to dissolve excess tummy fat or beautify a nose, only to be disappointed.

As surgeons, our job is to help each person who comes to us understand the realistic possibilities and to manage expectations, whether for surgery or non-surgical treatments. If a patient is not ready for a facelift, then we will tell him/ her. If there is not enough fat or excess skin to be improved by liposuction or a tummy tuck, we will inform the patient. In those cases, perhaps a non-surgical treatment might fit the bill. Likewise, we will tell patients if what they desire is too much to expect from spa-type treatments.

We see many patients who have far too much facial/neck sagging, far too much sagging tummy skin, or far too much fat for any non-surgical device to substantially benefit them. In those cases, the best course, and ultimately the most cost effective, might be a cosmetic surgical procedure. The recent internet push for “non-surgical nose jobs” has caused a lot of misinformation about what that type of treatment can and cannot accomplish. For instance, a small depression high on the bridge might be slightly improved with a small amount of filler. On the other hand, a large hump is unlikely to be masked by filler. In fact, if too much filler is placed, it can migrate down the sides of the nose toward the eyes and create a very distorted appearance. These treatments are not without risks. If filler compresses or blocks a vessel necessary to supply blood to the skin of the nose it can cause skin loss.

This brings us to another issue with non-surgical treatments. A recent article in the New York Times and a story in People magazine discussed some of the problems people have had with cryolipolysis (a technique to freeze fat away). Aches, pains, stinging, numbness or paradoxical adipose hyperplasia (when the fat cells grow larger instead of disappearing) have occurred. This is not always the case, but these things can happen. Also, the use of ultrasound skin treatments is not the panacea for skin tightening. There is cost, some discomfort,

and limits on how much tightening can be expected. Some surgeons who have subsequently performed facelifts on patients who have previously undergone ultrasound skin treatments to the face have noted the tissue is more fibrous and difficult to handle surgically.

Fat-dissolving injections have been aggressively promoted, and they can dissolve fat, but there is a limit in how much, and the injections cannot remove sagging skin. Just remember that treatments like cryolipolysis, ultrasound skin tightening, fat dissolving injections and heat treatments have been around a shorter period than surgical treatments. As with any treatment there will be more to learn about them over time.

Regarding facial fillers, they absolutely have a place, but they are not a substitute for a facelift and cannot hide a large nasal hump or rotate an extremely hooked nose. On the other hand, while a facelift can substantially help sags and bags, it cannot re-inflate a face. We often recommend combination treatment; a lift for the sagging and fillers for the deep folds. A facelift cannot make fine wrinkles go away either. Sometimes we recommend a laser or chemical peel before or after the lift.

The answer to all the confusion is to consult with an experienced surgeon who has treated people you know. Then, review your options and make a more informed decision.

www.langsdonclinic.com

Dr. Langsdon

Text By Phillip R. Langsdon, M.D.

CONCIERGE PHYSICAL THERAPY

WITH DR. DAVID SPELLINGS PT, DPT

Concierge physical therapy is a specialized form of physical therapy that focuses on providing highly personalized and convenient care to clients in a private and tailored manner. This type of therapy typically involves a one-on-one, client-centered approach that goes beyond the traditional clinic setting. David Spellings is known for his work as a concierge physical therapist at the Memphis Jewish Community Center where he offers these personalized services.

Key features of concierge physical therapy include:

PERSONALIZED CARE: Concierge physical therapists take the time to thoroughly assess each client's unique needs, goals, and conditions. They create individualized treatment plans that address these specific concerns.

ONE-ON-ONE ATTENTION: Unlike the more common group or clinic-based physical therapy sessions, concierge therapists provide undivided attention to their clients during each session. This allows for a deeper understanding of the client's progress and needs.

FLEXIBLE SCHEDULING: Concierge physical therapists often offer flexible scheduling options, including evening or weekend appointments, to accommodate their clients' busy lifestyles.

COMPREHENSIVE SERVICES: These therapists typically offer a wide range of services, including manual therapy techniques, therapeutic exercises, pain management strategies, and education on injury prevention and self-care.

CONTINUITY OF CARE: Clients often work with the same therapist throughout their treatment, promoting a strong therapeutic relationship and

consistent care.

ENHANCED COMMUNICATION: Concierge physical therapists maintain open and regular communication with their clients to track progress, adjust treatment plans as needed, and provide ongoing support.

By offering a higher level of personalization, convenience, and attention, concierge physical therapy aims to optimize the client's overall experience and outcomes. David Spellings' role at the Memphis Jewish Community Center involves providing this specialized form of physical therapy to clients, ensuring they receive the highest level of care and attention to meet their unique needs and goals.

Photo by Idesha Reese

Concierge physical therapy services accept Medicare Part B and Blue Cross Blue Shield health insurance. Cash rates are available for those who may be out of network. If you are interested in learning more about concierge physical therapy at the Jewish Community Center or want to schedule an appointment please don’t hesitate to reach out: david@conciergephysicaltherapists.com or 731-345-1846.

Memphis Jewish Community Center 6560 Poplar Avenue Memphis, TN 38138

HOME FEATURE

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Lovelace Studios

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Sélavie Photography

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DESIGN

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Courtney Peters Interior Design courtneypetersinteriordesign.com

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EXPERIENCE THIS

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Avenue Wrapping & Chickasaw Oaks

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TRAVEL

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Travel Leaders

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HEALTHY YOU

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IN THE KITCHEN

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Margaret Monger

ON A GOOD NOTE

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Fayette Cares

fayettecares.org

FAYETTE CARES

During October, National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, ending the cycle of abuse should be on everyone’s mind. Experiences like Jeremy’s*, who grew up enduring abuse, shed light on the trauma domestic violence can cause in a family.

Now in his 50s, Jeremy still remembers being nine years old when his father woke him up before dawn to go deer hunting on a crisp autumn morning. That day, he prayed for perfect aim. He needed courage to take the shot. But it wasn’t deer he planned to kill; it was his father.

For years, his dad brutally beat his mom. Because there weren’t programs like Fayette Cares to protect him, his mom, or his sister, Jeremy believed he was the only one who could end the suffering.

Jeremy’s dad lived on for many years, and so did the abuse. But Jeremy vowed to help others trapped in abusive homes, so he made supporting Fayette Cares an essential part of his life. He and other supporters allow Fayette Cares to train police to break the cycle of abuse by connecting victims to immediate safety and support services.

At Fayette Cares, victims get help in navigating the complicated and intimidating justice system, community members learn how to recognize dangerous relationships, and allied partners learn how to respond to those suffering from violence. Fayette Cares’ services are also available to those struggling in different ways. Families contending with poverty can find shelter, food, clothing and other forms of help they need to recover from crisis.

Abuse, poverty and despair can trap families in terrible situations, sometimes for generations. Visit FayetteCares.org to learn how you can support the meaningful work of the organization.

* Pseudonym used for privacy

Fayette Cares will host its annual fund-raising gala, A Night of Southern Elegance – Evening on the Red Carpet, Nov. 11 at The Venue in Somerville. The event will include cocktails, dinner, dancing, and live and silent auctions. For more information or to purchase tickets, go to fayettecares.org/gala.

TEXT AND PHOTO COURTESY OF FAYETTE CARES