BC Parent Education Issue

education issue 2013 www.bcparent.ca

New Family Law Act

Homework Hassles

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inside ...

4 The New Family Law Act What has changed

6 Halt the Homework Hassles

10 2014 Education Guide 19 Soaring to New Heights A princely role for a young ballet dancer

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20 Marriage Breakdown 5 ways to keep your cool

Help your kids succeed

8 Could your child be colourblind?

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22 How to take the fright

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Education Issue 2012 Volume 22, Number 7

bcparent.ca • education 2013 3

The New Family Law Act

By Craig Neville

K

ids, it has taken over 30 years but your “best interests” in parenting disputes have gone from being the primary consideration under the law in British Columbia to the only consideration in the new Family Law Act. I am not sure what that will mean but your parents are going to have to pay attention.

Your parents, and our courts, are required to look at factors such as your emotional wellbeing, your views where appropriate, your relationships with the people in your life, the history of who has cared for you, your need for stability, whether there has been family violence, and whether or not it’s a good idea to be asking your parents to cooperate as joint guardians. In other words, are they capable of focusing on your best interests?

Some things aren’t changing. If your parents separate (it won’t be your fault and I hope you realize that) they will both still have to support you based on their incomes regardless of where you are living. Calculating their income will still be challenging 4 bcparent.ca • education 2013

but no one said having your parents separate was going to be easy.

Just be alert to the fact that once you turn 19 the guidelines for child support start to get a bit unpredictable and your parents can even ask you to make your own contributions to your expenses if you are at uni-

Kids— parenting responsibilities are to be exercised in the best interests of the child so there is not much hope that you will be able to avoid eating those vegetables.

versity or college. They may cooperate and work with you on budgets and expectations so be alert to the fact that they may have expectations of you at that point.

There are new provisions in the Family Law Act which will affect stepparents and are interesting. Stepparents are only liable

for your support if they have supported you for at least a year and your birth parent seeks support from the stepparent within a year of the last time he or she supported you. You can see that the test might be a bit tricky. The new Act, in providing that stepparents have a duty to support you, also says that that obligation is secondary to your birth parents’ obligations and is subject to looking at your standard of living. No, I don’t really know how that will be sorted out either.

Big changes are now in place regarding parenting. Parents aren’t going to be arguing about custody under the Family Law Act but will in fact be addressing “guardianship”, “parenting responsibilities”, “parenting time”, and “contact”.

Parents who have lived together are your guardians. They can agree after separating that one of them won’t continue to be a guardian or the court can decide that one of them won’t continue to be guardian. If your parents have never lived together then only the parent you have been living with is your

guardian although they could subsequently agree that they will both be your guardians.

Confused?

Even if they haven’t lived together they can be your guardians even if they haven’t agreed they will be but the other parent “regularly cares” for you. We will no doubt take some months to figure out what “regularly cares” for you is going to mean. Even if they subsequently marry or you convince them to live in a “marriage like relationship”, the other parent won’t become your guardian solely for that reason.

After separation, where your parents are both guardians they will share or each be given certain “parenting responsibilities”.

The act describes these responsibilities and they include deciding where you will reside, who you will live with, where you go to school, where you’ll go to church, what medical and dental treatment you’ll receive and whether you have to eat all your vegetables.

Parenting responsibilities are to be exercised in the best interests of the child so there is not much hope that you will be able to avoid eating those vegetables.

“Parenting time” is the actual physical time each of your guardians is going to spend with you. Only guardians get parenting time. If one of your parents is not a guardian, then he or she will only get “contact” which is much like access under the old law. A parent who has contact doesn’t

Kids— just for good measure, the courts will also be able to punish your parents if they don’t exercise their parenting time or one of them doesn’t permit you to see your other guardian.

get much say in how you are raised and basically gets time with you. So its not going to help to complain to a parent with contact since they don’t have guardianship rights.

Contact can also be provided (by agreement of your guardians), to grandparents which is nice since it was often very difficult

for grandparents to get time with their grandchildren under the old act.

Just for good measure, the courts will also be able to punish your parents if they don’t exercise their parenting time or one of them doesn’t permit you to see your other guardian. That should be interesting since those penalties haven’t existed before.

All of these issues can be readdressed under the Family Law Act if there has been a change in your needs or circumstances.

That can often happen as you get older, start school, become a teenager, or…

If you want to really create some havoc, convince one of your guardians to move to another jurisdiction after they separate. There are new rules for planning such a move and the legislature has tried to make the process more transparent but I am not hopeful—so lots to think about under the new Act. So there you are. A quick look at an initiative in British Columbia designed to make your circumstances a little clearer. We will see what happens!

Craig Neville is a family lawyer in Vancouver and partner at Watson Goepel. His practice is limited to mediation, arbitration, collaborative family law, and parenting coordination

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bcparent.ca • education 2013 5

Halt the Homework Hassles Preparations parents can make to help their kids succeed

By Lara Krupicka

J

ulie Jung-Kim drinks a lemon-lime soda as her daughter Isabella prattles about the school day. They sit companionably at the kitchen table, Isabella talking between bites of her snack. It’s a pre-homework ritual that suits them both.

Jung-Kim takes Isabella’s afterschool schedule seriously. She knows following it makes a big difference in what happens with Isabella’s homework. But her homework routine didn’t happen by accident, nor did it come together overnight. Jung-Kim has learned what works and what doesn’t. And what works, stays.

If you’ve struggled over homework in your household, don’t give up. You may be only a few tweaks away from a more productive process. Following are some tips from experts and parents for minimizing homework trouble.

Be informed

Knowing ahead of time what the school and teacher expect of your child can eliminate many frustrations. Some school districts post their suggested guidelines on a district website. These might include standard amounts of homework to expect per grade. Many teachers also explain their homework standards during a beginning-of-theschool-year open house. If not, don’t be afraid to ask your child’s teacher early on about what work you can expect at home.

Neil McNerney, a counselor and author of Homework: A Parent’s Guide to Helping Out Without Freaking Out, strongly encourages parents to attend their school’s “back to school night.”

He says, “Learn as much as you can about each subject, homework policies, tests, etc. Then review this information with your kids to make sure you are all on the same page.”

6 bcparent.ca • education 2013

Discuss homework expectations with your child either before school starts or on a weekend when there isn’t any homework to be done. Avoid introducing the topic in the midst of a homework session.

Share what you and the teacher will be asking of him and how that may have changed from the previous school year. Make sure to also ask your child what he expects. Open the lines of communication right from the start.

Establish a routine

Teacher and mom, Gwen Stephens, believes in the value of routine.

“Establish a time every day that homework is to be done,” she says. “For some kids it works best to get it done right away. Other kids need time to chill out.”

The key involves ironing out what works best for your family and then sticking with it. When there’s a rhythm in place, kids learn to roll with it. Routine alone can smooth out problems with homework—particularly in assuring a prompt start.

For Jung-Kim the routine involves a quiet environment. Usually she picks Isabella up from school two hours before she retrieves her son from daycare. The two enjoy some one-on-one time at first. Then it’s time for distraction-free homework. No television, no computer, no music. Jung-Kim has learned keeping her daughter calm allows a more trouble-free process. And with no distractions for herself, JungKim is free to step in when Isabella has questions or needs help.

In Stephens’s home the routine is similar: her girls walk in the door and grab a bite to eat. Then they start on homework as they snack. Stephens keeps the same schedule every day, including Friday, unless one of the girls has an after-school activity.

Mom, Christa Hines, implements a timer in her routine to keep the schedule on track.

“I give my son 30 minutes to chill out and play,” says Hines. “We set the timer so there’s no argument at the end of the 30 minutes.”

Finding a good homework routine make take some trial and error.

And it may not be the same for all the kids in your house. One may do best getting right to the homework, while another requires downtime first. And afterschool lessons and sports may require shifts in the routine for a season. But once you find what works, be consistent.

Create a space

Like a routine, workspace needs may vary between children. Some work best where there are few visual distractions, such as at a desk facing a wall. Others may prefer company while working, or need to be near mom for help. Again, don’t be afraid to switch around for the first few weeks to find a suitable spot for your child. But once you’ve created an acceptable space, maintain it.

Michele Smith’s three children work together at one table.

“They have dedicated space on our dining room table all week so they can keep their supplies out.”

As Smith notes, it’s important for children to have homework supplies available. There’s nothing more frustrating than starting a worksheet on measurements, only to find you don’t have a ruler.

Double-check your stash of pencils, erasers, and other supplies.

Then store them near where your child will be working.

If you’re ambitious, you can set out supplies at their workspace before they return from school. The subtle message encourages them to get to work sooner.

Provide support with boundaries

Be encouraging. Give your child concrete observations about themselves that demonstrate you believe they can succeed at homework.

Note past successes, as well as tools and skills they’ve gained.

And when it comes to completing homework, be accessible without hovering.

“It’s good to check for completion, but not a good idea to make your child re-do assignments due to sloppiness or a poor job,” says McNerney.

Above all, avoid the desire to do the work for your child. Both Stephens and McNerney are firm on this point.

“Some parents don’t know when to let the child do homework without interfering.” Stephens explains. “(Homework) should be something the teacher checks, not the parent. Otherwise that’s not the child’s homework any more. It’s the parent’s.”

Stephens also advocates for parents practicing memorization of spelling and math facts. Given their limited time during the school day, teachers rely on parents to supplement with work at home.

“Take flash cards in the van,” Stephens urges.

Model a firm but positive attitude

Remember that learning to complete independent work is a life skill. When your child complains about having to do homework, acknowledge their frustration. Then encourage them to get to work.

If you’ve struggled over homework in your household, don’t give up.

You may be only a few tweaks away from a more productive process.

“I expect every year homework will increase,” says Stephens. “I say, ‘It’s not going to get easier as you get older.’”

McNerney encourages parents to watch their semantics, particularly with children who would rather skip the work.

“Stop calling it homework! When we ask our kids: ‘Did you do your homework?’ they will usually only think of actual homework and not studying, reading, practicing, and working on long-term projects. Instead ask: “What work do you have tonight?”

Using these tools, you can ease your child back into the routine of schoolwork at home. The results should be encouraging to everyone.

While homework isn’t always her family’s favorite part of the day, Jung-Kim is pleased with her setup, especially having personal time with her daughter.

“It let’s her know I am here,” she explains.

Sometimes that’s the best thing parents can do for their kids when it comes to homework.

Lara Krupicka is a freelance writer who reevaluates the homework routine for her three daughters every school year.

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bcparent.ca • education 2013 7

Could your child be colourblind?

By Anne Scott My first clue came when my son Sam was seven.

We were out for a walk and he spotted a baby’s hat on the ground.

“Look!” he said, picking it up. “A little pink hat!”

It was definitely purple.

ike Sam, about 8 in every 100 boys are colourblind, and about one in every 200 girls. Colourblindness can affect your child’s school performance, career choices and more.

L

Four signs your child could be colourblind:

• They like to draw, but not to colour.

• They make odd choices when colouring pictures. “Whatever colour crayon my sons pick up first, that’s what colour the whole picture is going to be, whereas my daughter will use different colours for the house, the sky, the sun,” says Mary Lu Spagrud of Prince George, mother of two colourblind boys.

• They have difficulty naming and recognizing colours.

• They have trouble distinguishing shades of green, dark tones, or pastel shades such as mauve and pink.

The good news is that for most children, being colourblind isn’t a major concern,

especially if parents and teachers are aware of it and coping strategies are put in place.

Sam, for example, went on to graduate from St. George’s with honours and is currently working as a web designer.

“I work in a very visual industry,” he says, “and my colour vision deficiency hasn’t affected me in any noticeable way.”

Early testing is key:

If you think your child might be colourblind, it’s important to arrange testing as soon as possible.

One reason is that schools use colourcoding extensively, especially in the primary years. If testing reveals colorblindness, be sure to schedule a meeting with the teacher to explain that your son or daughter may not (for example) be able to sort the red blocks from the green ones, and that this has absolutely nothing to do with their intelligence. You don’t want your child to be mistakenly labelled as learning-disabled or disobedient!

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8 bcparent.ca • education 2013

Another reason for early testing is that many careers—such as police officer or airplane pilot—require normal colour vision.

Finding out you can’t follow your dream career is disappointing, but it’s better to find out early than late.

Beware of online vision tests:

Use online colour vision tests with caution— the results can be affected by how your computer screen is set up or the lighting in the room.

If an online test seems to indicate colourblindness, always visit an optometrist or ophthalmologist to confirm. Testing should always be done by a trained professional with correct lighting under controlled conditions.

Talking to the colourblind child:

If you discover your son or daughter is colourblind, you may feel more upset than they do. Remember that to the child, their vision seems completely normal.

You may want to remind your child that although most people use the term colourblind, they are not blind. In fact, in some ways, their vision may be better than normal: colourblind people are better able than those with normal vision to “see through” camouflage, and some are able to see better in dim light.

“When they found out my uncle was colourblind, they switched him into reconnaissance, and he was used for spotting enemy camouflage in World War II in Europe,” says Spagrud.

Encourage your child to learn about colourblindness, and to let people (especially

FAQs about colourblindness Do colourblind people see the world in black and white? Very rarely. Only about 1 in about 33,000 people sees no colours at all—just black, white, and grey (this kind of colourblindness is called achromatopsia.) Most colourblind people see a whole rainbow of colours— it’s just a bit different from the normal rainbow.

Can girls be colourblind? Yes, but it’s rare. Only about 1 in every 200 females is colourblind, compared to about 8 out of every 100 males. However, 1 in every 6 women carries the gene for colourblindness (though not colourblind herself).

teachers) know about it. Find a phrase your child prefers, and coach them on using it: “I’m colourblind,” or “I have a colour vision deficiency.”

Teasing and other sticky situations:

In the unlikely event of teasing, a dollop of scientific jargon can be surprisingly effective. You could coach your child on the following phrase: “Like 8% of the male population, I have anomalous trichromasy.” (Ask your optometrist or ophthalmologist for the correct terminology).

Remind the colourblind child that they’re not alone—many famous and successful people are colourblind. Since colourblindness is inherited, there may also be colourblind people in your own family who could give them advice.

symbol into items that match; ask salespeople for help when buying clothes; or shop by catalogue or online, where clothing colours are named.

• Figuring out when a traffic light is green: In most countries, the green light is on the bottom • Telling if you’re getting sunburned: Ask a friend.

With a little support and awareness, colourblindness can be no more than an inconvenience.

Anne Scott is the author of A Different Rainbow — A Child’s Experience of Colourblindness: A Guide for Colourblind Children and their Parents (slated for publication in early 2014).

Why are more males than females colourblind? For a boy to be colourblind, he must inherit colourblindness from his mother. For a girl to be colourblind, she must inherit it from both her parents, which is more unlikely.

Can babies and young children see colours? Although most children don’t learn to accurately name colours until they’re aged about four to seven years old, this doesn’t mean they can’t see them: research shows that babies can see colours when they’re only a few months old.

Can colourblind people drive? In BC, as long as you can understand traffic signs and signals, you can drive. ICBC says, “… colour vision in itself is not a requirement for safe driving. Driver Examiners who test drivers with colour vision deficiencies will be cognizant of the strategies used by the driver to compensate for their deficiency. A driver may use such cues as the location, size, shape, and brightness of a sign or signal to recognize its meaning.”

Tips for daily living:

People with mild colourblindness may have little or no difficulty with the tasks below.

However, some colourblind people need to develop other ways to carry out daily tasks involving colours: • Deciding when fruit or vegetables are ripe: Feel firmness instead • Avoiding red-hot burners: Hold hand well above stove to test • Deciding when meat is cooked through: Ask a friend, or use a meat thermometer • Coordinating your clothes: Sew the same bcparent.ca • education 2013 9

independent school listings Student Gender

Grades

Class size

Enrollment Day/Boarding/Total

Bodwell High School and Bodwell Academy 955 Harbourside Drive, North Vancouver, BC 604-924-5056; www.bodwell.edu/highschool/

co-ed

8–12

17

200/160/360

Brockton School 3467 Duval Rd., North Vancouver, BC 604-929-9201; www.brocktonschool.com

co-ed

K–12

20

150

14,140–15,685

Brentwood College School 2735 Mt. Baker Road, Mill Bay, BC 250-743-5521; www.brentwood.bc.ca

co-ed

9–12

17

76/392/468

22,500/day 42,000/boarding

Children’s Hearing & Speech Centre of BC 3575 Kaslo St., Vancouver, BC 604-437-0255; www.childrenshearing.ca

co-ed

PS–2

6–8

28

rate varies per program

Choice School 20451 Westminster Hwy, Richmond, BC www.choiceschool.org

co-ed

K–7

16

n/a

12,995

Collingwood School 70 Morven Drive, West Vancouver, BC 604-925-3331; www.collingwood.org

co-ed

JK–12

15–20

1265

9,000-19,500

Core Education & Fine Arts (cefa) Abbotsford, Burnaby (2 locations), Langley, New Westminster, North Vancouver, Richmond Vancouver, West Vancouver, White Rock 604-708-2332; www.cefa.ca

co-ed

JK & cefababy

12-16

n/a

295–1,245/month

girls

JK–12

18-20

850

$17,825

The French International Cousteau School of Vancouver 3637 Fromme Rd, North Vancouver, BC 604-924-2457; www.cousteauschool.org

co-ed

PS–7

15

127

7,300–8750

Fraser Academy 2294 W. 10th Ave., Vancouver BC 604-736-5575; www.fraser-academy.bc.ca

co-ed

1–12

Max. 10

200

25,950

Fraser Valley Elementary School 20317 67 Ave., Langley, BC 604-533-5469; www.fves.bc.ca

co-ed

K–1

18

48

approx $23,980 (tax receipts issued)

Kenneth Gordon Maplewood School 420 Seymour River Place, North Vancouver, BC 604 985-5224; www.kgms.ca

co-ed

1–9

15

140

19,950

School Name

Crofton House 3200 West 41st Ave., Vancouver, BC 604-263-3255; www.croftonhouse.ca

10 bcparent.ca • education 2013

Cost per Year 8,200/local 11,200/international

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independent school listings Student Gender

School Name

Le Conseil Solaire Francophone de la C-B co-ed (SD No. 93, publicly funded French-language program) 180-10200 Shellbridge Way, Richmond, BC; www.csf.bc.ca

Grades

Class size

Enrollment Day/Boarding/Total

Cost per Year

K–12

Varies

n/a

n/a

Madrona School Society #215 2678 Broadway St. W Vancouver, BC 778-991-5545; www.madronaschool.com

co-ed

1–7 (full & part-time)

4 to 14

30

16,000

Marpole Bilingual Montessori School 1296 West 67th Ave, Vancouver, BC 604-266-1091:www.marpolebilingualmontessori.com

co-ed

PS–K

20

80

n/a

Meadow Montessori Elementary & Preschool 11391 Dartford Street Maple Ridge, BC 604-465-3492; www.meadowmontessori.ca

co-ed

PS–6

20

39

$2550–$5500

Meadowridge School 12224 - 240th Street, Maple Ridge, BC 604-467-4444; www.meadowridge.bc.ca

co-ed

JK–12

20

528

17,500

Mulgrave School 2330 Cypress Bowl Lane, West Vancouver, BC 604-922-3223; www.mulgrave.com

co-ed

PreK–12

20

840

5,000–16,300

North Star Montessori 1325 East Keith Road, North Vancouver, BC 604-980-1205; www.northstarmontessori.ca

co-ed

PS–7

varies

80

n/a

Pacific Rim Montessori Academy Richmond, Vancouver, BC 604-726-8428; www.pacificrimmontessori.com

co-ed

PS–7

20

n/a

4,250–7000

Open Houses Oct. 26, 10:00am - Jr. & Sr. Kindergarten Nov. 02, 10:00am - Grade 6 & Grade 8

We educate girls for life 12 bcparent.ca • education 2013

croftonhouse.ca/welcome

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independent school listings

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Depuis sa création en 1995, le Conseil scolaire francophone de la ColombieBritannique offre des programmes et des services éducatifs valorisant le plein épanouissement et l’identité culturelle des apprenantes et apprenants francophones de la province. Le conseil compte aujourd’hui plus de 4 700 élèves, 37 écoles publiques et dessert plus d’une centaine de communautés réparties dans l’ensemble de la province.

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bcparent.ca • education 2013 13

independent school listings Student Gender

Grades

Class size

Enrollment Day/Boarding/Total

Cost per Year

Pacific Spirit School 4196 W. 4th Ave., Vancouver, BC 604-222-1900; www.pacificspiritschool.org

co-ed

K–8

14

n/a

6,000

Richmond Jewish Day School 8760 No. 5 Rd., Richmond, BC 604-275-3393; www.rjds.ca

co-ed

K–7

15–20

80

Contact us for cost

St. George’s School 4175 West 29th Ave., Vancouver, BC 604-221-3890 www.stgeorges.bc.ca

boys

1–12

20

St. John’s School 2215 W. 10th Ave, Vancouver, BC V6K 2J1 604-732-4434 / 604-629-2458; www.stjohns.bc.ca

co-ed

K–12

14–22

354

16,120

St. John’s International School 300 - 1885 W. Broadway, Vancouver, BC 604-683-4572; www.stjohnsis.com

co-ed

10–12 with ESL program

15

100

13,500–14,400 (3 terms)

girls

ECE–12

15

237/103/340

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co-ed

K-12 (day) 8-12 (boarding) 8-10 (ESL)

18

680/238/918

School Name

St. Margaret’s School 1080 Lucas Ave., Victoria, BC 250-479-7171; www.stmarg.ca St. Michaels University School 3400 Richmond Road, Victoria, BC 250-370-6170 www.smus.bc.ca

1040/120/1160

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www.westsidemontessoriacademy.ca 3075 Slocan Street, Vancouver

604 434 9611

Limited space available for all grade levels for 2014쐍쐍 Applications accepted up to January 10th 2014 14 bcparent.ca • education 2013

independent school listings E 9 5 8 < A ĂŠ Â? J E < G < A ĂŠ Â? @ 5 G ; Â? F G H 8 L F > < ? ? F 5 A 8 @ B E 9

Belonging â&#x20AC;&#x153;It is like when everyone is your best friend for real.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Ben, age 4 Alderwood House is a nature based, early education program in Richmond, for children 12 months â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 5 years.

Rooted in reggio-inspired philosophy, our goal is to foster social emotional learning.

Opening new location in Port Coquitlam, January, 2014!

Grade

CHANGER 579 G;9 A9KG E9CBEG 75E8 J<G; FL?I5A Our personal learning approach will really connect with your child, combining engaging technology with amazing teachers, raising grades and conďŹ dence. Act now to take control of this school year.

1.800.EDUCATE

Abbotsford Â? Coquitlam Â? Delta Â? Kelowna Â? Langley Â? North Vancouver Â? Richmond Â? Surrey Â? Vancouver Â? West Vancouver Â? White Rock

www.alderwoodhouse.com

SY LVA N L E A R N I N G . C A

Dreamâ&#x20AC;Ś BabyGoRound at Face the World House

BABY GEAR COLLECTION DRIVE SATURDAY NOVEMBER 23 11:30am â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 2:00pm

Achieve!

Offering a personalized academic experience, exceptional IB Programme, guaranteed small class sizes and a vibrant school community.

KITSILANO COMMUNITY CENTRE PARKING LOT 2690 Larch Street, Vancouver

Ĺ&#x2014;Ä&#x2026;Ĺ&#x2014; Ĺ&#x2014;Ä&#x2026;Ĺ&#x2014; Ĺ&#x2014; Ĺ&#x2014;Ä&#x2026;Ĺ&#x2014; Ĺ&#x2014; Ĺ&#x2014;

We are currently accepting all baby gear, but are unable to accept clothes or toys at this time. (visit our website for a complete list)

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www.babygoround.ca

I dream of being a school counsellor and helping others to achieve their goals.

- Maddy, Grade 6 A non-denominational, co-ed Kindergarten to Grade 12 school

brocktonschool.com | 604-929-9201 | 3467 Duval Road, North Vancouver

bcparent.ca â&#x20AC;˘ education 2013 15

independent school listings Student Gender

Grades

Class size

Enrollment Day/Boarding/Total

Cost per Year

co-ed

K–9

N/A

1500

No-charge

Shawnigan Lake School 1975 Renfrew Rd., Shawnigan Lake, BC 250-743-5516; www.shawnigan.ca

co-ed

8–12

15

58/387/445

18,800 day 34,900 boarding (BC Students)

Southpointe Academy 1741 - 56th Street, Tsawwassen, BC 604-948-8826; www.southpointeacademy.ca

co-ed

PS–12

15–20

460

7,000–9,900

Stratford Hall 3000 Commercial Drive, Vancouver, BC 604-436-0608; www.stratfordhall.ca

co-ed

K–12

16–22

490

15,225–17,900

Traditional Learning Academy 1189 Rochester Ave., Coquitlam, BC 604-931-7265: www.traditionallearning.com

co-ed

K–12

14

176

1,750–3,350

Urban Academy 101 Third Street, New Westminster, BC 604-524-2211; www.urbanacademy.ca

coed

JK–12

10–18

140

6,680–12,997 varies by grade

Vancouver College 5400 Cartier Street, Vancouver, BC 604-261-4285; www.vc.bc.ca

boys

K–12

20–32

1,065

6300

Vancouver Montessori School 8650 Barnard Street, Vancouver, BC 604-261-0315; www.vancouvermontessorischool.com

co-ed

PS-7

20

250

5,400–8,200

School Name SelfDesign Learning Community School District 008-Kootenay Lake PO Box 74560, Kitsilano RPO, Vancouver, BC 604-224-3663; www.selfdesign.org

16 bcparent.ca • education 2013

independent school listings Pre-K to Grade 12

Reading

Writing

Math

French

Better grades start at Oxford Learning Make this year the best yet with Oxford Learning.

All Ages. g All Grades. All Subjects. j

Enrol Today!

With 7 locations in the Lower Mainland

oxfordlearning.com

Vancouver Montessori School (Est. 1972)

8650 Barnard Street, Vancouver V6P 5G5

604-261-0315 www.vancouvermontessorischool.com Preschool: For children 3-5 years of age Extended Day: For the 5 year old child Elementary: For children 6-12 years of age

Parent Meetings 2014 (RSVP): • Extended Day & Elementary Orientation – Feb. 20 at 7:00 p.m.

• Preschool Orientation & Registration – Feb. 20 at 7:00 p.m.

• Preschool Orientation & Registration – April 3 at 7:00 p.m.

THE MONTESSORI CLASSROOM A Child-Centered Community The Prepared Environment – Materials Which Invite Activity Practical Life – Skills of Daily Living Sensorial – Exploring The World Mathematics – From Concrete to Abstract Language – From Spoken to Reading and Writing Art, Music & Cultural Subjects – Integrated P.E. & Working Outdoors – The Natural Environment French – The Fundamentals of Expression and Comprehension A Montessori education provides your child with an integrated, individualized, and academically challenging program that meets his/her changing developmental needs from year to year.

Childhood happens once. A Montessori education ensures that your child will make the best of hers/his.

Please call us.

Experienced and loving teachers use the Montessori method in a loving and joyful environment to give your children a good foundation for life. The method fosters independence, confidence, self discipline and a love for knowledge in the developing child.

LESCO MONTESSORI preschool & daycare [ESTABLISHED IN 1995]

12720 Cameron Dr, Richmond

604/279-4228

VILLAGE MONTESSORI preschool & daycare [ESTABLISHED IN 1975]

2770 McKenzie Ave, South Surrey

604/535-0660 SPACES AVAILABLE 쐍 CALL FOR INFORMATION bcparent.ca • education 2013 17

independent school listings Student Gender

Grades

Class size

Vancouver Hebrew Academy 1545 W. 62nd Ave, Vancouver, BC 604-266-1245; www.vhebrewacademy.com

co ed

PS-7

12

Vancouver Talmud Torah 998 West 26th Ave., Vancouver, BC 604-736-7307; www.talmudtorah.com

co-ed

PS–7

18-22

500

8,000–10,000 (subsidies available)

Vancouver Waldorf School 2725 St. Christophers Road, N. Vancouver, BC 604-985-7435; www.vws.ca

co-ed

PS–12

20-30

300

3,420–11,670 (subsidies available)

West Point Grey Academy 4125 West 8th Avenue Vancouver, BC 604-222-8750; www.wpga.ca

co-ed

JK–12

22

940

13,000–18,400

Westside Montessori Academy 3075 Slocan St., Vancouver, BC 604-434-9611; www.westsidemontessoriacademy.ca

co-ed

PS–4

16 (elem) 25 (pre)

85

preschool: 4,750 grades 1-4: 8,650

Westside Montessori School (WMS) 4157 Oak Street, Vancouver, BC V6H 2N1 604-731-6594 www.westsidemontessori.ca

co-ed

PS–K

20

80

Preschool: 6,000 Kindergarten: 7,500 Extended Day Kindergarten: 13,500

girls

JK–12

16-20

656

17,500–18,200

School Name

York House School 4176 Alexandra St., Vancouver, BC 3274 East Boulevard, Vancouver, BC 604-736-6551; www.yorkhouse.ca

Enrollment Day/Boarding/Total

Cost per Year Preschool: 5000 K-7: 10,200

Note: Information provided is accurate at time of printing. Categories such as class size and cost are in many cases averages. Contact each school to confirm information.

CELEBRATING OVER 50 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE

Marpole Bilingual Montessori (Est. 1985) Pre-School, Junior Kindergarten & Kindergarten Celebrating Over 25 years of Montessori Teaching in the Community

GI VE

YO U

LAN RC ND HILD O C E THE GIFT OF A S

E AG U G

The ability to learn languages is highest between birth and age 6. Our French-English preschool program maximizes a child’s natural curiosity and ability to learn a second language during this important window of opportunity.

• Established in 1962 • Caring, experienced & highly qualified bilingual teachers • Bright, extra-spacious classrooms • Private indoor & outdoor play areas • Introduction to French, reading, math, science and nature, music, crafts • Educational field trips Accepting Wait List Applications for SY 2014-15 VANCOUVER BILINGUAL PRESCHOOL 949 West 49th Avenue (at Oak St.) Vancouver, BC V5Z 2T1 Phone/Fax: 604.261.1221 vancouverbilingual@yahoo.ca

•

www.vancouverbilingual.com

18 bcparent.ca • education 2013

Our enriched Montessori curriculum includes: The Phonetic approach to Reading & Writing, Mathematics, Geography, Science, Music, Art, French, Yoga and a variety of Cultural subjects. Children are required to wear school uniforms.

We offer 2-1/2 hour and 3-1/2 hour programs for 2-1/2 to 5 year olds as well as an Extended day program for 5 year olds. Private English Tutoring and Afterschool Phonics classes are also offered.

1296 W 67TH AVE., VANCOUVER, BC V6P 2T2 FOR AN APPOINTMENT PLEASE CALL TEL:

604-266-1091 쐍 EMAIL: bilingualmontessori@hotmail.com

www.marpolebilingualmontessori.com

SOARING TO NEW HEIGHTS A princely role for a young ballet dancer

DAVID COOPER PHOTOGRAPHY

By Bev Yaworski

eventeen-year-old Grade 12 student Theo Duff Grant, has been training at the Goh Ballet since 8 years of age.

He is passionate about dance. After auditioning with hundreds of dancers, Theo obtained the male lead role of The Nutcracker in the classic Christmas ballet.

“This role involves a lot of acting and characterization with demanding dancing,” says Theo. “I really have to convey the journey of the Nutcracker to the audience through movement and mime so that they really understand the story. I also have to interact with many other characters in the ballet such as Clara, the central role. One of the best and also challenging parts is getting to practise my acting.”

In preparation for the shows, Theo maintains a dedicated weekly schedule of about 30 hours of classes and rehearsals to perfect the unique ballet lifts and jumps. “Ballet also includes a lot of cross-training, weight lifting at the gym to help with the lifts, along with pilates and swimming to help with cardio and endurance. I balance it all by being very focused,” emphasizes Theo.

S

It is Goh Ballet’s 5th year presenting their critically acclaimed Nutcracker to enthusiastic BC audiences. Theo has taken part in all 5 years, but this is his first time as the Nutcracker. “This year it is also very exciting for me to dance with the guest artists from The Royal Danish Ballet. We can watch them, talk to them and be inspired by them.”

Every year, through open audition processes in the Spring, students of the Goh Ballet and ballet schools throughout BC are encouraged to audition for and participate in the annual performances of The Nutcracker. These performances provide them with the confidence and stage manners necessary to complement their dance training.

One of the most popular ballets and theatrical marvels in the Western world, The Nutcracker is a beloved holiday tradition for both young and old. Based on the classic E.T.A. Hoffman fairy tale “The Nutcracker and the Mouse King,” The Nutcracker tells the story of a young girl Clara, who receives a Nutcracker doll from her godfather. Clara dreams that her Nutcracker comes to life and leads an army of toy soldiers into battle

against the evil Mouse King. After the Mouse King is defeated, Clara and her Nutcracker journey through the beautiful Land of Snow and the Kingdom of Sweets, witnessing a world of breathtaking magic along the way.

“Goh Ballet’s celebrated production of The Nutcracker is filled with imagination and something for everyone; whether one is seeing dance for the first time or is a seasoned dance aficionado,” says Chan Hon Goh, Director of the Goh Ballet. “Award-winning dancers, gymnasts, ballroom couples and even an illusionist bring the ballet to life with our special guest artists from The Royal Danish Ballet dancing to Tchaikovsky’s memorable score performed live by members of the Vancouver Opera Orchestra.

All of this provides an unforgettable live performance experience that has truly become Vancouver’s own Holiday Tradition.”

The Nutcracker is a family event. Children of all ages are welcome. The production is presented December 14–22 at the Centre in Vancouver, 777 Homer Street.

More info: www.gohnutcracker.com. Tickets available through Ticketmaster.ca. bcparent.ca • education 2013 19

Marriage Meltdown 5 Ways to Find Your Cool John Gottman: The Marriage Guru John Gottman, Ph.D. has been rigorously studying the communication behaviour of couples since 1972. He is considered a top expert in Marriage and Family Therapy, and his book, 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work, is a bestselling manual for couples who want healthier, happier relationships. Gottman’s research identifies four communication habits that can predict an eventual breakup: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. He calls these “The Four Horsemen,” and his work has helped couples all over the world turn these negative patterns around.

Happy Marriage in a Nutshell Couples who stay together tend to: • Praise and compliment each other often (at least four times as often as they criticise).

• Listen to each other without interrupting • Acknowledge and validate each other’s feelings • Take responsibility for their actions in the relationship • Ask each other for what they want and need • Take responsibility for soothing their own emotions • Put time and effort into appreciating and enjoying each other

20 bcparent.ca

W

hat planet are you from?!?” My voice took on a shrill pitch that even I couldn’t stand, and everything important I had to say burst out of my mouth slimed with criticism.

My husband and I were at it again. It seemed like we had been fighting constantly since our baby daughter was born. Our brains were coated in the grime of sleepdeprivation, guilt, and parenting anxiety, and we had no resources left to solve everyday grown-up problems. At a time when we needed each other desperately, we could not reach out and connect.

It turns out, we were not alone. Big transitions, like the birth of a baby, are often the trigger for a marriage meltdown. Mother of two, Sue LeBreton, sympathizes, “My husband and I have a joke; it should be illegal

By Laurie Zottmann

to divorce before the kids are in school, because the years up to then are just madness.”

It’s enough to make two decent people get nasty.

If your relationship with your spouse is red-lining, it’s time to cool things off. Try these five steps to relieve that maddening pressure, and get yourself back in a functioning and hopeful place.

1. Time Out. If you do not have anything nice to say, retreat and regroup. Put aside more time for yourself, and make sure you use it for things that help restore your calm.

Take baths, do your nails, do yoga, read, run, or journal.

2. Vent. Done the right way, venting will blow off that dangerous pressure, and make room for a more balanced perspective. Share your pain with a friend who has survived

the marriage roller coaster. If things are really intense, aim the flames at something inanimate until the temperature cools: scream into a pillow, journal, or write NEVER-tobe-shared letters.

3. Appreciate. It might feel weird because you feel more like raging, but the effect is powerful. Sandi Haustein, mom of two, says, “Something that helped me was a gratitude list about my husband. Whenever I was feeling frustrated, I’d take the time to sit down and think about the things that I appreciate about him. It really turned my thinking around.”

4. Focus In. In the heat of the moment, every little annoyance can feel like a dealbreaker, but as you start to calm, you can pick out the big issue that is hollering for your attention. Ask yourself questions like, “What do I need right now that I’m not getting?” and, “What would I ask for, if my husband could give me anything?”

5. Make a Wish. Pick a time that is calm, without distractions or an audience. Approach your husband, and tell him as calmly and directly as possible what you wish for. Like he was a genie in a lamp, just ask for what

you need—like, “Honey, I really need more breaks from the kids. Can you please take them for an hour after dinner each night?”

Skip right over your frustrations, and go straight to your need. Be open to negotiate or problem-solve a bit to make it work.

By approaching your husband with a concrete request, you give him a chance to do what many men do best: be the hero. By resolving your frustration beforehand, you can approach him calmly and skip the criticism and defensiveness that instigate most fights.

You might be amazed at how much better you feel when he starts to pitch in, particularly if you thought he did not care.

Most of the time, our husbands care deeply and want to give us everything; they just can’t read our minds.

So, the next time your marriage starts to steam, take five deep breaths and five concrete steps to release your rage, define your problem, and invite your husband to do something wonderful for you.

Laurie Zottman has been learning how to make it work with her genie, Devon, for eleven years.

How Common is Marital Strife in Early Parenthood?

• Raising young children is tough in any marriage. Problems at this stage are so common that public health and religious services have devoted many resources to helping moms and dads make it through this tricky time.

• Most community health programs offer classes to prepare parents for their challenging role, and these improve both parenting and the marriage. A 2012 study found that parents who took community courses, such as basic infant care or behaviour management for toddlers, avoided the drop in relationship satisfaction that is well-documented for most beginning parents.

• Some parenting courses are relationshipspecific, such as the Happy Couples, Happy Kids Project at the University of Notre Dame, which focuses on training mothers and fathers to prioritize their marriage and nurture it as part of their parenting work.

• The abundance of research and programming to help parents improve their marriage suggests two things: first, that relationship struggles in early parenthood are very common; and second, that there are many places where frustrated couples can get help.

Let your child’s dental visit be a positive experience.

Prevention and maintenance of good oral health is our focus.

LITTLE SMILES DENTAL CENTRE Dr. Jong Hyun Ban DDS, FRCD(C)

Certified Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry 3770 West 10th Ave Vancouver, BC

www.thelittlesmiles.com

(604) 222-2206

bcparent.ca • education 2013 21

W

e rang the bell and waited: a two-year old knight, a four year-old princess and me. The door cracked open and a large menacing face peered out and yelled, “boo!!” The princess laughed and shouted “trick or treat”. The knight bolted, jumping off the porch and running across the lawn to the sidewalk.

Our eleven-year-old neighbor quickly removed his mask and tried to coax my son back saying, “It’s only a mask. It’s really me, Adam, your friend.” My son would not budge, his two-year old mind unable to understand that Adam was still Adam, although his appearance was covered-up by the mask.

My son’s reaction was completely normal, as the ability to grasp that a person remains himself even when wearing a disguise does not develop until age four or five. Even then, the ability may come and go in different situations. Like all aspects of mental development, this skill grows over time.

Halloween, with its scary sounds and sights, can induce real fear in young children. The experience of being frightened can lead to nightmares and fears that persist long after the holiday.

Protect the youngest members of your family from unnecessary and harmful fright by following these tips.

•

•

•

•

•

Choose unthreatening costumes and party themes. Favour good fairies over witches, and pumpkins over goblins.

Encourage costumes without masks. Mask-free costumes help children to understand that a person can take on an imaginary role and still remain the same person. Many pediatricians and police officers recommend against masks because they block vision and can lead to accidents.

Avoid haunted houses. Haunted houses contain multiple scary scenes, all of them displayed in the dark accompanied by scary music. They are disturbing and inappropriate for young children.

Avoid groups of older costumed children. Older masked and costumed children are another unnecessary source of fear, especially because some of them enjoy frightening their younger friends. Small children will be less confused by costumed figures their own size Play “Dress-Up” throughout the year. Kids love this game, which helps them learn how a person can take on an imaginary role but still remain herself.

•

Place a mask over only part of your face, and then quickly take it away. Let your child observe how mom or dad is still there, with or without the mask.

Gradually cover up more of your face, again removing the mask quickly. Let your child try playing with the mask in the same way, in front of a mirror. This can be played as a variant of “peek-a-boo,” an all-time favorite of most young children.

• Stay close to your child while trick-or-treating. In addition to ensuring their physical safety, you can explain threatening sights and sounds and diffuse fears as they arise. Remember that your presence is the ultimate security for your child.

• Take your child’s fear seriously. Don’t laugh it off, or worse, tease or mock your child over it. Don’t allow others to do these things either, including older children. Try to explain to your frightened child that the scary images are not real, but above all, comfort and help your child to feel comfortable.

Try the “Mask” game.

As for the frightened knight, my three-year old son would not even approach “that scary house” the next Halloween. This was so, even though he played with the children who lived there and had visited the home during daylight hours. Two years later, a confident four-year-old was eager to trick-ortreat at the once-feared house. When the door opened and a masked face appeared, my son shouted, ”That’s a mask! I know it’s you, Adam. Give me my candy!” Adam laughed, and handed over a chocolate pumpkin.

How to take the Fright out of Halloween 8 Tips for Parents of Young Children

By Sharon Nolfi, M.A.

22 bcparent.ca • education 2013

STRESSED STR ST S TR E ESSED SS S S ED

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VANCOUVER, V ANCOUVER A ANCOUVER, BC V6B1N2 INFO@SIMPLYBACKOFFICE.CA INFO@SIMPL LY YB YBACKOFFICE.CA

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Family package of 4 tickets (value over $340) to Goh Ballet’s The Nutcracker.

Traditional, classical and impossibly pretty—Goh Ballet’s The Nutcracker is a holiday tradition in the most beloved sense sure to delight the entire family. Featuring enchanting choreography by Emmy Award and Dance Magazine Award recipient, Anna-Marie Holmes, and performed to live musical accompaniment of the Vancouver Opera Orchestra, this dazzling production is filled with over 200 glittering characters. In addition, world-renowned Principal Dancers from the Royal Danish Ballet will make their Vancouver debut.

December 14, 15, 20, 21 & 22 Matinees & Evenings, at The Centre in Vancouver, 777 Homer St. www.gohnutcracker.com Tickets through Ticketmaster.ca Child, Senior & Student discounts available

Visit www.bcparent.ca to enter Contest ends December 5th

bcparent.ca • education 2013 23

TSTAN “AN OUELIGHTDFIONG PRODUCTION.. RPRISE . SU LLOW ON AND D E AFTER ANOTHER” R=J?KQRAN OQJ

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