Anger

Anger

It is very common and understandable to feel angry about the death of someone close to you. This can be directed towards the person who has died for leaving you behind; for doing, or not doing things that might have led to a different outcome for them or you. People can get angry about things that were or were not said between you; things that were or were not done. Depending on the circumstances around their death, you might also feel angry with other people, if you feel that they, or you, were let down in some way.

You may experience intense anger towards strangers who appear to be carrying on as normal in a world that seems completely different: people who don’t seem to be taking the guidance during the pandemic seriously, for example. You may find that you get intensely angry about seemingly insignificant or unrelated things. Perhaps you feel angry at the injustice and unfairness of their death or the whole pandemic.

You may just find yourself more generally “irritable” or “annoyed” and having more disagreements with those close to you or “taking it out” on your family. Or you may notice that you are less generous and kind in your thoughts; this can feel shocking if you generally think of yourself as a “good” person and then find yourself feeling “resentful” in response to people’s apparently happy social media announcements, for example.

These feelings are very common and it can be appropriate to express anger about the situation you find yourself in. However, acting out our anger or suppressing it can have unintended negative consequences on our relationships, our health and our everyday functioning.