BLAIRE 21 by Blaire Magazine

DECEMBER 2014

EMILY EATON EDITOR SARAH LONG CREATIVE DIRECTOR MONICA JANKOWSKI MUSIC DIRECTOR EDITORIAL CONTRUBITIONS: NICHOLAS IVANOVIC FILM DAVE LEE FILM MITCHELL PASCOE SPORT TORY PRICE FASHION TOM BENSLEY LIFE SPENCER HADLOW LIFE YEN LI WONG LIFE BRADLEY COWAN MUSIC MAGAZINE DESIGN EMILY EATON FEATURING: MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS, PEPA KNIGHT, THROTTLE, BLAK APPAREL, SMILE CLOTHING, SKYE HARRINGTON FASHION SPONSORED BY OZ APPAREL ENQUIRIES / SUBMISSION / ADVERTISING: SARAH@BLAIREMAGAZINE.COM ABN: 62359130068 WWW.BLAIREMAGAZINE.COM

BLAIRE MAGAZINE T-SHIRTS AVAILABLE FOR PREORDER SOON!

CONTENTS

CHARITY / SMILE CLOTHING

10.

MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS

16.

SNIFFER DOGS AT MUSIC FESTIVALS

18.

PEPA KNIGHT

24.

THROTTLE

29.

MUSIC REVIEWS

30.

FASHION / BLAK APPAREL

36.

FESTIVAL ANTICS

50.

SEXY SURFERS

52.

PHOTOGRAPHY / SKYE HARRINGTON

57.

FILM REVIEWS

58.

THE DRIVE IN

60. ELEPHANTS 62.

CHEEKY CHAPTERS / FUCK NO

CHARITY / SARAH LONG

Smile started operating in 2010, an organisation focusing on the provision of school uniforms and t-shirts. For every item of clothing they sell, Smile donates school uniforms or t-shirts to children in need on a one-for-one basis. Smile has successfully given over 7,500 garments to children in need, and have been lucky enough to travel throughout Indonesia, remote Australia, Cambodia, India, Sri Lanka, and the Phillipines to help. They are helping to provide for children in parts of the world where simple things such as clean t-shirts or school uniforms are not readily available. Smile are trying to make a difference that counts. We chatted to founder, Soren Molineux, about their amazing efforts so far. WHERE IN THE WORLD ARE YOU RIGHT NOW? I’m currently in Noosa, on the Sunshine Coast. WHERE DID YOUR IDEA ORIGINATE FROM? During 2007 I heard about TOMS shoes, a one-for-one company based out of the United States. A friend of mine had shown me the first video clip they had done of a ‘Shoe Drop’ in Argentina during 2007. Immediately after watching this, I set to start out a one-for-one clothing program, focusing on School Uniforms and t-shirts. The next couple of years were about setting things up, clothing programs trialed, samples made, and we started operating in 2010. The notion of sustainable giving, and using commerce in an inherently good way seemed to make sense to me. For myself, and the rest of the Smile team, we had all travelled fairly well during those formative years of our life (late teens and early twenties). This led us down some paths that would go on to shape us in some regard, and more than anything we were exposed to people that needed our help, especially in regards to clothing. These travels, together with seeing a one-for-one company for the first time, decided what I wanted to do for a new hobby. WHAT HAS BEEN THE MOST REWARDING PART OF YOUR JOB? The most rewarding part is the clothing programs we have run over the past four years. We have now successfully given over 7,500 School Uniforms or T-Shirts to children in need, and on every single program the smiles we receive and the general stoke levels from the kids is the single most rewarding thing we do.

WHAT DOES SUSTAINABILITY MEAN TO YOU? The word sustainable just means to be able to continue at a certain rate or level, which we should aim towards. I think from a sustainable giving point of view, we here at Smile are not changing the world on a massive scale, but I am very proud of the small difference we are making. I think that anyone that is incorporating something good, or sustainable, in their business model is doing a great thing that they should be stoked with. DO YOU PLAN ON EXPANDING TO BUILDING FACILITIES FOR THESE KIDS IN NEED? In an ideal world, for sure. We are not in a position to do so at this point, but it is definitely something we have discussed here at Smile. There are also other initiatives we have been looking into, including mosquito netting to remote areas and also joint giving programs with other organisations. WHAT ARE SOME OF THE MOST MEMORABLE RESPONSES YOU RECEIVED? The response from the kids on each and every one of our clothing programs is amazing. All of the Programs have been memorable in their own right; it is realistically just kids being kids a lot of the time as well, which is really nice to see from our end. We are simply trying to allow them more time at school through providing uniforms or t-shirts, which we feel is the least we can do. ARE YOU PLANNING ON PARTNERING UP WITH SIMILAR ORGANISATIONS TO HELP STRENGTHEN THIS CAUSE? We are definitely aiming to partner up with other social enterprises and charities as we get a bit bigger, and look at promoting some joint giving programs. Instead of focusing on just school uniforms or t-shirts, our plan has always been to work with other organisations on a similar path to incorporate a manner of giving to whole communities on each program. Giving programs that focus on a plethora of ways to help communities in low socio-economic areas. DO YOU USE RECYCLED MATERIAL TO AVOID OVER CONSUMERISM? Currently we do not use recycled materials for production. It’s certainly not out of the question, but at this stage its something we have not delved into, or know enough about. We would have to ensure that the process of recycling does not end up making more energy demands than using cotton, and things like that. That being said, there are small things we do like using 100% recycled stock for our paperwork, hang tags, business cards and things of that nature. DO YOU WANT TO TAKE YOUR IDEA TO OTHER LESS-FORTUNATE PARTS OF THE WORLD? Without a doubt. At this stage we have successfully donated clothing in Indonesia, Australia, Sri Lanka, India, The Philippines, and Cambodia. In 2015 we will be focusing on some other areas in Indonesia, China, Sri Lanka and Australia. WHAT ARE SOME SMALL STEPS PEOPLE CAN TAKE TO START CHANGING THE WAY THE WORLD THINKS? I’m not sure if I am qualified to answer a question with such large scope, especially without just listing clichés and adages. I guess I would just say to try and live an examined life, as simply as possible. 8

MIDNIGHT JUGGERN

NAUTS

From Glastonbury to tiny Mediterranean festivals, you name it and Midnight Juggernauts have done it. Now celebrating their 10-year anniversary, and always ones to do things differently, their latest electronic offering ‘Aerials’ gives all proceeds back to the Aboriginal Benefits Foundation. We caught up with Vincent to chat about bizarre concerts in the forest, their love of Google Earth and where the next 10 years might see them. SO YOUR NEW EP IS AERIALS, CAN YOU TELL ME A BIT ABOUT IT? Well we did it really as a few of our members were overseas and just recently one of them came back to Australia. So we thought let’s get back together and quickly record this EP and get it out and do some shows over the summer. It’s more of an electronic affair I suppose. We also liked the idea of making it for a good cause. So again, Daniel, one of the members, his family was involved with one of the indigenous communities in Western Australia and he had some friends on the Aboriginal Benefits Foundation and we thought why don’t we connect these two worlds and put out an EP where people can buy it by choosing an amount they want [to donate] and then 100% of that amount goes to the foundation. Which is a good way to connect the dots. IS THE ALBUM CONNECTED TO THE CAUSE OR DID YOU WRITE THE ALBUM AND THEN DECIDE YOU WANTED TO GIVE AWAY THE EP FOR A GOOD CAUSE? It’s two separate interests; we wanted to work with both the foundation and put out this EP and then we thought we could connect the two which would make sense, and maybe we could do more EPS in the same fashion where we could put them towards a cause which we’re interested in. AERIALS IS ABOUT VERTICAL PERSPECTIVE FROM ABOVE AND BELOW, WHICH SOUNDS REALLY PHILOSOPHICAL, SO CAN YOU EXPLAIN THAT A BIT? We wanted to make this more of an audio visual production, so it’s not just the music. When we play our live shows, we have an element where it’s based around more screen art, around screens on the ceiling. We tried to have some on the floor as well but it was tricky. We had a test at the Vivid Festival, when we did the show at the Opera House in May. And that was just mainly incorporating more video screens and visual which was based around maps in Google Earth. And we had cameras that were facing down, so some on the ceiling facing down and some on the down facing up. We tested that at Melbourne music week a week ago too so we’re still refining this idea and finding all the other elements to build on the concept. Sometimes it’s dictated by the venue space on what’s possible, and how high the venue ceiling may be. SO DID YOU THINK ABOUT ALL THAT AS YOU WERE WRITING THE EP OR AFTER? We thought about it before the album, we wanted to connect the visual and audio aspects. A lot of it is about looking up or looking down. So rising and descending notes and playing with ideas within that world. IN YOUR NEW SINGLE ‘FREEFALLING’, THE VIDEO ACCOMPANYING IT IS VERY MUCH LIKE A HOMAGE TO GOOGLE EARTH AND ALL THE DIFFERENT 3D IMAGES THAT PEOPLE PUT UP. IT’S REALLY UNUSUAL THOUGH, WHERE DID YOU GET THE IDEA FROM? Well I’ve always been interested in maps, and when I was a kid I always wanted to be a cartographer; I think it was to do with special awareness and knowing about the world. Then when Google Earth came out I remember just spending hours and hours on that program and just being fascinated in connecting the dots of all these public places on the earth. All of a sudden you can reference your home town to the pyramids of Egypt or to the Great Wall of China! Then 11

YOU’RE IN BIZARRE SCENARIO; YOU’RE IN THE ALPS PLAYING ON A WEIRD TV SHOW AND THEN NEXT YOU’RE IN SHANGHAI PLAYING A BIZARRE FESTIVAL

we thought of the idea of transferring it into a music clip where we could look at the globe from above and incorporate ourselves in all these things. And it was also based around this idea of collecting all these 3D models of the world which are now all being replaced by automated images. There was a hell of a lot of work that people put in to create these models and I thought it deserved its own music video. DID YOU LIKE THE 3D MODELS OF YOURSELF? Well that was a friend who made the 3D models of us and I said, ‘Oh you can make us look as creepy and bizarre as you want,’ but I think I kind of look like a woman wearing a wig. It could have been worse. YEP, ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE. IT’S YOUR 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY THIS YEAR… THAT’S A LONG TIME! Yes it has been a long time! And we’re still working together and we’re still surprisingly speaking to each other. When we started we probably thought that we’d just play a few shows. Then we got a following and then we put out an EP and then an album and then it just kind of rolled on and it felt natural. I think there’s one aspect to it also that since we moved separately and we delved into other projects we haven’t been in each other’s pockets the whole time. It’s good because you can put out an album and then you can take a break and then you can take your energies elsewhere and rejuvenate and come back and play and come into the studio and still be inspired. DID YOU MEAN TO DO SOMETHING FOR A 10-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OR DID IT JUST HAPPEN THAT YOU GUYS WERE ALL BACK IN AUSTRALIA? It just happened that one of the members just moved back to Australia and we realised, oh we started in 2004, and there was an opportunity to play at Melbourne Music Week so we thought we could turn this into an occasion because it’s not often that bands last that long. I think our initial idea for that Melbourne Music Week anniversary show was to get other bands that were around in 2004, but when I contacted them a lot of them are now either working as lawyers or real estate agents, or they haven’t spoken to each other, or moved away so it was a little bit more difficult to gather some of those bands. WHAT’S BEEN THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR LAST 10 YEARS WITH THE BAND? Well we’ve had a lot of adventures along the way, it’s been a lot of fun. Some things have been strange or quite bizarre because you feel that you’re in a travelling circus. You’re in bizarre scenario; you’re in the Alps playing on a weird TV show and then next you’re in Shanghai playing a bizarre festival so there have been strange moments that I look upon fondly and think, is that really us? Did it happen to us? It’s been eventful! SINCE YOU MENTIONED IT, WHAT’S THE MOST BIZARRE THING TO HAPPEN TO YOU? Well there’s been a few… I remember we were playing a show in Japan and we got lost in a forest. We went on a long walk, it was in a ski resort but during the off season in the summer, and it was in these mountains and we just went for a long walk and we got lost and we didn’t know how to get back to the venue. We were running around trying to find some reference on how to get back. And eventually there was some band was playing and we heard music floating through the valley and actually led us back to the venue. We’re still standing anyway and we’ve survived it all.

AWESOME! DURING THE 10 YEARS YOU GUYS HAVE PLAYED LOADS OF FESTIVALS INCLUDING REALLY BIG ONES LIKE COACHELLA AND GLASTONBURY, WHERE HAS BEEN YOUR FAVOURITE? I think actually my favourite is this small one in Corsica called Calvi On The Rocks, just because there’s this stage and it’s basically on the Mediterranean in the middle of nowhere. You’re on this island you’re stuck there and you’re forced to delve into the activities of the place. We were there two or three times and we had an amazing time each year. Often for these festivals it’s about the location and if it’s a natural location as well and has some space. It makes some memorable moments. AND SMALLER FESTIVALS ARE MUCH MORE INTIMATE AND LESS STRESSFUL! Yeah definitely if you lose a friend at Glastonbury, you’re not going to find them again! I just remember after we played and we tried to find our friend we ended up on a wild goose chase for three or four hours. So yes, something to be said for the smaller festivals. ARE YOU DOING MUCH TOURING WITH YOUR NEW EP NOW? We do one-off shows over the summer but we have some more bizarre gigs coming up. There’s this arts festival in Melbourne which is more of a bizarre, conceptual show for that. But a lot of these gigs are more special moments. We probably will do another tour next year but for now it’s just one-off events when we can get together. YOU GUYS RUN YOUR OWN INDEPENDENT LABEL, WHAT’S THAT LIKE? Yeah we have a label called Siberia which we started a few years ago and we have a few other bands on it. But that’s branching out into these other film productions as well. It’s been branching out into vision as well as sound, so that’s pretty busy. DO YOU THINK BEING INDEPENDENT HAS SHAPED YOUR MUSIC CAREER? Oh yeah. It definitely means we can have more freedom. It’s made it more fun and easier than if we were tied into a label or had other people’s schedules that we had to abide by. So when we tour it’s a lot more fun getting to choose the places we visit because we turn it into a holiday as well rather than just a tour where you have to trudge from city to city. WHAT DO YOU SEE YOURSELF DOING FOR THE NEXT TEN YEARS? Ah it’s kind of hard to tell if we’ll still be around. A lot of these things have seen us branching out of areas outside music, so even with the label we’ve been doing behind the scenes work with different events and different parties and also these other installations like sound and video installations that we’ve been setting up for different festivals. It’s been fun this exploring different paths. SO YOU COULD BE ANYWHERE REALLY? Yeah I’m not really sure if I’ll still be in Melbourne, I like the idea of moving somewhere to a hot tropical island if we could do what we’re doing now… HAHA THAT’S WHAT EVERYONE WANTS! Yeah, probably. Hopefully we’re still enjoying ourselves. LAST QUESTION; IF YOU HAD TO DESCRIBE YOUR MUSIC IN THREE WORDS, WHAT WOULD THEY BE? Three words… red, green and blue, the primary colours which make up the spectrum. Zoe Bradley 15

SNIFFER DOGS AT MUSIC FESTIVALS The accidental overdosing of drugs has caused deaths at music festivals in recent years, due to the fear of being caught. So do we remove sniffer dogs from music festivals to avoid this?

Summer in Australia usually spells the advent of days out in beaches, chilling at local rooftop bars and enjoying a bit of the cricket (for those so inclined). For music lovers, though, summer in Australia is celebrated by going to one of the many major music festivals on offer. These have regularly been able to attract international acts from every music genre imaginable and thus, many have cult followings from music fans all across the globe. Whether you’re a fan of indie, rock, pop or electronica, you’re spoilt for choice. After all, no summer is complete without comedic attempts at doing the Mexican wave or trying to shuffle with complete strangers. Throw in a semi-drunken brawl or two and your festival experience is almost complete. The cherry on the icing is being hauled aside and ordered to be strip searched because a police sniffer dog has deemed that you’re in possession of illicit drugs. YUP. Dogs can be adorable and they certainly are man’s best friend. But try looking unconcerned when a dog is sniffing the daylights out of you and you’re staring down at his nostrils mentally willing him not to sit next to you. It’s enough to make even the most innocent of festival goers to break out into nervous, cold sweat. There is no disputing that the police are doing their bit to reduce drug consumption around the country. The problem arises when it is shown that sniffer dogs aren’t actually good deterrents to drug use. In fact, studies have shown that festival goers – when faced with sniffer dogs at venue 16

premises – would then choose to a) consume the drugs prior to entering the venue itself; or b) panic and swallow everything, never mind that that was five ecstasy tablets you just ingested. There have definitely been too many unfortunate incidents revolving around panic consumption of drugs at music festivals. James Munro died at the age of 23 on 16 September 2013. Gemma Thoms, a mere teen, died from drug related causes in 2009. The parallels between these two cases are many – both were music lovers looking to have a good time but ultimately resulting in death. Let’s place morality and judgement aside for the moment: there is no doubt that both Munro and Thoms were guilty of illicit drug use. However, were their deaths hastened by the very strategy employed by police forces to deter festival goers from consuming drugs? The answer is sadly yes. There is also the fact that sniffer dogs aren’t Gods; they are biologically more susceptible to be able to sniff out certain types of drugs as opposed to others. So, for instance, they are more likely to be able to detect marijuana in a pocket rather than say, methamphetamine. This information is readily available for those discerning enough to know where to look (Google, anyone?). If that’s the case, who’s to say that people won’t start downing ecstasy at concerts and leaving the cannabis for private consumption? In fact, a study by the National Drug and

Alcohol Research Centre shows that 40% out of 500 respondents indicated they have shifted or are looking into shifting from marijuana to ecstasy or methamphetamine at festivals. Another staggering statistic shows that dogs get it wrong 8 times out of 10! This means that there is every likelihood that you and I might be singled out by sniffer dogs if we were to frequent such music festivals, drug user or non drug user nothwithsanding. Now that really puts the spotlight on the effectiveness of having sniffer dogs at music venues. And yet, the Police Department persist in utilising this method in their attempt to fight drug abuse. I concur that they are doing everything that they can to reduce drug use in the country. However, there seems to be a massive blind spot where sniffer dogs are concerned. In 2011, a police spokesperson was quoted as saying that, ‘sniffer dogs... creates an element of fear in people with drugs.’ Yes, people who see the sniffer dogs are very likely to feel fear (especially if they do have drugs on them). However, if the drugs spur them to do the very opposite of what the police intend with the sniffer dogs (i.e. consuming the drugs at one go outside the venue), perhaps it is time to deploy Plan B in the fight against drug use. Yen Li Wong

With electronic music festivals comes illicit drug use. This seems to be an appropriate adage for our times, as every major music festival featuring a heavy line-up of electronic artists, be it Defqon, Big Day Out, or the Parklife dance festival, each one seems to result in a slew of overdose reports and illegal drugs confiscated. To curb the inevitable overdoses and unfortunate deaths at these festivals, detection dogs, or ‘sniffer dogs’, are often waiting at the entrance gates. The problem with the use of sniffer dogs is that festival-goers are spooked when they spot the dogs coming in, so they down all their drugs at once (sometimes three ecstasy tablets or more) to avoid detection, and end up overdosing before they even start to enjoy the festival. Cases like Gemma Thoms in 2009 at the BDO and James Munro at Defqon who both died after consuming their drugs to avoid detection, have resulted in heavy criticism against the use of sniffer dogs. Many are calling for them to be removed, claiming they cause more problems than they solve. But blaming sniffer dogs for drug overdoses is simply missing the point. These dogs (often German Shepherds and Labrador Retrievers) are very good at what they do. They are able to detect illicit drugs

because in their training, samples of drugs are wrapped in towels and given to the dogs. When they find the drugs, they are rewarded with a game of tug of war using that same towel. So when the dog searches a person entering a festival, he’s looking for his favourite toy to play with. And we all know how tenacious a dog can be when he wants something. Drug detection dogs can pick up scents underneath layers of clothing, even if the substance has been sealed and smeared with something else to throw them off, because dogs can isolate a scent from the surrounding odours. It’s no wonder festival goers get nervous around them. It’s exactly this kind of situation that leads to ‘reactive decision making’, which is a decision made under pressure in reaction to the surprising or alarming situation. Swallowing three pills at once is exactly the kind of bad decision that a person makes when they’re scared and caught off guard. It’s a combination of, ‘I don’t want to lose my drugs,’ and, ‘I want to have fun,’ and it has disastrous results. To stop this from happening, there have been calls to ban drug dogs at festivals. Even electronic artists Art Vs Science have pleaded to try one festival with no detection dogs (presumably not just because drugged-up dancers make up most of AVS’s fan base).

But even if you take drug dogs away, people are still bringing drugs to festivals, still overdosing, dealing dubious pills and failing to look after themselves. Banning detection dogs is giving up – it’s refusing to explore other options. If people knew there would be sniffer dogs at the gates beforehand, there would be much less chance of a panic response. Police need to be honest with the public. The festival planners need to post the security measures on their websites and spread the message via social media. They need to create an audience who know what to expect and how to prepare. Perhaps they won’t bring drugs, or they might just take one before lining up instead of three or four. There’s no perfect solution when it comes to drugs and festivals. People will always take drugs. Many of these drugs won’t be safe, and as long as they remain illegal, official dosage information will be inaccurate and left up to the public. As with anything, our best chance at safety is to be educated on the subject. The same goes for festival security. Instead of frightening us with a surprise or eliminating an effective method, let us know what we can expect to see, so we can arrive prepared, calm, and ultimately safer. Tom Bensley

PEPA KNIGHT

I WANTED TO CREATE A NEW INSTRUMENT. SO I GOT TOGETHER A FEW BANANAS, WIRED THEM UP AND MADE A SORT OF MINI-BANANAKEYBOARD. I WAS CALLING IT ‘NANATRON’

Pepa Knight is one hell of an interesting character. He is part of Jinja Safari, he travels frequently to India for inspiration and for fun, and he has just released a solo album that can only be described as spiritual deliciousness. If you think that’s not cool enough, get this, he lives in a tipi in his backyard. Read on about his life, his music and where his ultimate performance on this earth would be. HOW DID THIS WHOLE MUSICAL JOURNEY START FOR YOU? I started to get into music with my brother’s band, who are now called Sea Legs. They’re a great Aussie band. I started off playing bass with them. Then, I started writing some solo stuff. I’ve always been writing solo stuff but all of it was trash [laughs]. I had like a little four track mixer at home and wrote all that stuff then. Eventually, I upgraded my production gear. Then, I started Jinja Safari which happened about five years ago with Marcus and I started writing for that. Now, we’re having a break this year. I had all these songs that I wanted to release but I wanted to find the right time to do it. And this is it. It was great timing. It’s one of those things that I love. I’ve been going to India for the last three years and I love it there. I’d been writing this album about my experiences there and I’d been recording samples and getting down lyrics over there. It was slowly piecing together and that’s how these songs have come about. I wanted to release it as its own thing, separate to Jinja Safari. The band is just on a break now and we will slowly get back into it next year. SPEAKING OF JINJA SAFARI, HOW DOES THE DYNAMIC CHANGE WHEN YOU WORK ALONE COMPARED TO HOW YOU WORK WITH THE BAND? Well, there’s so many advantages and disadvantages to both settings. With Jinja Safari, the set-up is different. I write back and forth with Marcus and then we get the other boys to jam on the songs and that’s how it happens. When you have a full band, you always have that back-board and that momentum. You get things done a lot faster and it’s a lot easier. If you do a tour, or if you do anything that turns out to be unsuccessful, you can all share the blame [laughs]. But with the solo thing, it’s heaps more daunting. I found out the hard way that it’s a lot of hard work, which I wasn’t expecting. I’m self-managing and I’ve tried to do a lot of it myself. I’ve had help from the guys at Rare Finds (Andrew Stone and Will Wittman). They’ve been really helpful. But it has just been so much work. And I have been going a bit overboard with everything from putting together vinyl cassette packages and putting together a live band of six travelling members. It’s been a very costly project. But in saying that, it has been so, so much fun. It has just felt really fresh and really exciting this year. It’s a different dynamic because all the decisions have to be made by me rather than as a band. YOU’VE JUST RELEASED YOUR FIRST SOLO ALBUM ‘HYPNOTIZED VOL.1’. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE A SOLO ALBUM TO YOUR NAME? It feels nice. I’ve been touring the last few weeks on the East coast of Australia and it feels nice. Hypnotized Vol. 1 is half of the album and there’s a Volume 2 coming that I’m just finishing off now. I wanted to make it one collection of songs because they all tie in with each other. It’s been awesome and feels really nice. This week it’s had a lot of really good feedback and you just get the warm and fuzzies about it. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE TRACK ON THE ALBUM? From Vol.1… Oh man, I can’t choose one. Maybe the first track, which is ‘Hypnotized’. It probably won’t be many other people’s favourite one but its mine. It’s got these fun, instrumental bits with sitar and tabla and stuff. I finished it off last and so it feels the freshest in my ear so I like that one. YOU TRAVELLED AROUND INDIA WHILST WRITING THE TRACKS FOR THIS ALBUM. HOW WAS THAT EXPERIENCE FOR YOU? HOW DO YOU THINK IT 19

COMPARES TO SITTING DOWN IN A STUDIO AND WRITING SONGS? The thing with travelling is that you’re constantly inspired every day. When you are home, you can fiddle with an idea, procrastinate and then end up hating it. But you are always moving and you are always exhausted. You don’t get as much sit down and focus on creating everything on the spot. I had a notepad for writing down any lyrics or ideas that came to me and I had a portable microphone that I had on me at all times for anything that suddenly came up. I also used the microphone to record bits and pieces of local musicians who wanted to contribute to this project. Whenever I had a spare chance, I would put my ideas together. Even on train trips. There was one train trip that was 48-hours long, which is pretty long. There was a tower in the room that we were in (luckily) and I was able to just piece together all the ideas that I had and start writing stuff. I READ ABOUT THE STORY OF A LADY WHO LET YOU RECORD HER VOICE AND YOU USED THAT IN A CHORUS FOR A SONG ON THE ALBUM? It has been really nice, having that aspect to the songs. A lot of people who hear the song won’t notice it but for me, it has tied it all in together perfectly. For the song that you’re talking about, that was written in Pushkar. That song is still to be released on the next volume but that one had a drummer from the town that plays percussion every afternoon. This gypsy woman by the lake sang for me and I recorded it. There was a lot of auto-tuning and tweaking to make it work but that’s what made it fun. Trying to make it sound right. It was a really fun process, doing it that way. IS IT TRUE, THAT YOU OWN A HOUSE, BUT YOU ACTUALLY LIVE IN A TIPI OUT THE BACK? Yeah! So I own a property on the Central Coast in Long Getty. Basically, my wife and I rent out the main house to a nice family and we live in the tipi. It’s sort of separated. We made it into two properties in a way so we’ve got the back half of the property to ourselves. We’ve got the tipi here and a studio nearby so we’ve got the best of both worlds. Lately, it’s been so stormy and horrible and in the tipi, you notice everything. It is pretty simple. We’ve got floorboards in there, we’ve got a bed and we’ve got a hammock. The hammock we got made with sticks and stuff for our baby. We made a baby not long ago and the baby’s been enjoying it in the tipi. But because of the rain and the creepy weather, it has leaked through a bit so I’m thinking we might change it up again. We might change the tipi back into a studio and we will sleep in a real house [laughs]. But it’s so nice. I recommend it to everyone ‘cause its just so nice. There’s something about being out around nature. The way tipi’s are made, they don’t get too hot or too cold. We’ve been loving it. This time last year, by accident, I deleted the whole album. So I had to re-record a majority of it. I set up my studio in the tipi and I might be doing that again this year. Should be good. YOU’VE JUST WRAPPED UP THE AUSSIE TOUR. HOW DID THAT GO? It was great! It was really fun. It was a lot of experimenting on stage. It was nice to try some new things. We had 3D projections so there were 3D glasses available at every show. We also had a live visual artist who was projecting these images. If you had the glasses, you could watch the images jump out at you. It was fun giving that a go. I think people really enjoyed having that visual experience whilst listening to the music. I also tried out this thing [laughs], I wanted to invent a new instrument. So, I got together a few bananas, wired them up and made a sort of mini-banana-keyboard. I was calling it a ‘nanatron’ [laughs]. Basically, I had them stringed up, hanging on stage and when I pressed a banana, it would play a certain note on the computer. I had it set-up to like a male choir sound and so whenever I touched this banana it would make a sound like a male choir. It did work pretty well but I had to make 20

THIS GYPSY WOMAN BY THE LAKE SANG FOR ME AND I RECORDED IT.

a new one every time for every gig. It was a lot of effort, especially because the bananas would get gross. A lot of the time, I would just end up eating the bananas on stage anyway, which is good cause you need bit of an energy boost sometimes. But the tour was really fun. I had only released two or three songs by the time the tour came around so it was a it too full-on to organise a full East Coast tour. I was really blown away with the kind response from the people that came to the shows. It was a lot of fun. IF YOU COULD PERFORM IN ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE AND WHY? That’s a good question. Anywhere in the world? Well, I’ve actually got a plan to go back to India once the second volume of the album is released. But this time, the plan is to go there and rehearse with a local band, get some songs down with the local musicians and then tour that around India. I want to be able to play with people who are can play Indian instruments for real. I really would like to do that. I think mainly because I get to go for a holiday but also get to jam with some of the best musicians in the world. That is not a very creative response though. For me to choose India [laughs]. I’m a bit obsessed with India. I got asked a similar question once and I said it would be really cool to play a show in the sky. If I could play anywhere in the world, I could just get a few hot air balloons to raise a stage and everyone could watch from their own hot air balloons. We could be playing music in the sky. That would be awesome. I could do that all over the world. Just keep flying and flying and flying. As long as the generator had enough fuel and as long as we had enough food and stuff. As long as there are enough bananas for everyone to eat and play music on. It might be a bit too much effort but it would be fun though. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU WOULD SPEND A LOTTERY WIN ON? I might buy some new shoes first [laughs]. Then, I’d pay off my house. I don’t think I’d do anything with the money. I don’t know, maybe give some of it away? I don’t know. Money is a tricky thing. I just think its a bad, bad thing in general. We all want it but we don’t really want it. It’s one of those things. I don’t know what I’m trying to say anymore but the way I’ve been living lately I’ve been enjoying. I have a simple lifestyle and I don’t need any fancy things. If I had that much money though, I would pay off the house and then just chill out and not work so much. I guess I’m never going to stop writing songs though, am I? [laughs] I guess I’d just take it easy and then give the rest all away. THREE WORDS TO DESCRIBE HYPNOTIZED VOL.1 ? Just three words? Okay, three words - really, really good. Nah, I don’t know. Really good LOL? [laughs]. That’s three words right? Monica Jankowski

Robbie Bergin is your average, teenage school kid. Except he’s not! He might be Robbie to his friends but to the music world, he is Throttle. This boy wonder has been working hard on his grades and simultaneously making mean tracks for all off the world to hear. He has supported Avicii on tour and will be playing at next year’s Future Music Festival. We chat to Robbie about juggling school and music, his musical idols and what it’s like being so young in such a competitive music industry. HOW (AND WHEN) DID THIS ALL START FOR YOU? Well, I’ve been playing guitar for about six years. I’ve done it since I was in primary school. That was my introduction into music and where my love of music basically started. From there, I started to get into dance music and dropped the guitar for about three to four years. Only recently, I’ve gotten back into guitar and started recording that to use in my songs. HOW DID THE NAME THROTTLE COME ABOUT? This actually happened when I was about fourteen. It was on an Italian holiday. We were trying to find a name and we saw it written somewhere. The fourteen year-old me thought it was a cool name [laughs]. I guess it’s a bit of a fourteenyear-old name but it’s grown on me and I’ve grown into it. And I’ve just stuck with it. It was honestly something I saw written somewhere, probably on a motorbike or something. I don’t really remember [laughs]. WHERE DO YOU GET ALL YOUR INSPIRATION FROM? My biggest musical inspirations are Justin Timberlake and Michael Jackson. That probably came out about because Justin was the first musician I ever saw perform. That was back in 2007 and it was just incredible. From that, I developed a love for live music and I grew a desire to have that in a live show. That has influenced me to the extent that it’s made me want to make music that I can perform in a live setting. As far as production goes, guys like Knife Party have been really influential for me. Their production level is incredible. Someone like Matty M, who blew up from playing in his bedroom to touring on a global scale. He’s probably the one that just showed me that a kid, a young kid could make it. But it’s nice having inspiration within the scene as well. YOU’VE MADE MENTION OF THE FACT THAT IT IS HARD FOR YOUNGER DJ’S AND ARTISTS TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY IN THE INDUSTRY. WHY DO YOU THINK THIS IS? I think because it’s such a saturated industry now and the fact that anyone can download music-making software or DJ software. I think the title of ‘DJ’ has become misconstrued. Especially with the up-rise in dance music. The market is becoming so flooded with young kids who just all-of-a-sudden decided they want to be a DJ. I do feel like that is becoming less common. I feel like people are having more respect now and age is not nearly as much of an issue as it was before. When I started, everyone would always be like, ‘Oh, you’re so young! You’re such a young kid!’ But now, it’s really nice that age is no longer important and the music is appreciated more. DO YOU THEN VIEW SOMETHING LIKE PERFORMING AT FUTURE MUSIC AS A RECOGNITION OR ACCEPTANCE OF THE TALENT OF YOUNGER ARTISTS? Yeah! It’s still really surreal for me, playing at Future Music. But that has always been one of my biggest goals as far as the Australian market goes. That was the big one for me. They always showcase artists that I love the most. But yeah, it’s weird being on the billing with guys like the Prodigy, who were almost the first dance act that I ever heard of. I guess it does say something about the dance industry. That young kids can perform with such epic names. And that’s just because of the access to programs that they can get online. SPEAKING OF FUTURE MUSIC, WHO ARE YOU MOST LOOKING 24

THROTT

TLE

IT’S WEIRD BEING ON THE BILLING WITH GUYS LIKE THE PRODIGY, WHO WERE ALMOST THE FIRST DANCE ACT THAT I EVER HEARD OF

FORWARD TO BUMPING INTO BACKSTAGE? I would have to say Martin Garrix. We met up last year when I played Future in Sydney. He is just the nicest kid and he just absolutely crushes it. He music is insane! His last show was so energetic and yeah he’s just a lovely kid. I can’t wait to meet up with him again. DO YOU GET NERVOUS BEFORE YOU PERFORM ON STAGE? Well, I haven’t really done any performances this year, except for the two Avicii shows where I supported him and one Future show. Just with school, I’ve strayed away from doing any performing. I’ve always been of the belief that its just more important to make music that creates the demand for a show rather than make shows to create the demand for the music. This year I just haven’t had the music and I haven’t felt that I’ve been ready to start shows yet. That’s why I’ve held off on the local market so much. I do still get a bit nervous when I perform. Even when I was performing back in the day for 20-30 people on guitar, I would get a bit nervous. I think everyone gets a little bit nervous and its just about managing the nerves. But often smaller crowds of 20-30 people can be just as daunting as thousands of people. So, its just a matter of being confident and then making sure that the live shows are as best as they can be. WHAT ABOUT WHEN YOU WERE PERFORMING AS PART OF AVICII’S AUSTRALIAN TOUR THIS YEAR? WHAT WAS THAT EXPERIENCE LIKE FOR YOU? It was really the first time that I had ever seen my music being played in front of a large crowd. I did the remix of his track ‘You Make Me’ and that was probably the first exposure I had to such a big market. Just seeing him play that was just on another level. I had seen clips online of him playing it but that really made me realise that this was actually something that I could do for the rest of my life. I made a song in my bedroom and two months later, it ends up being played all across the world. That’s the biggest thing I got out of the Avicii shows. That and DJing in front of thousands of people. It was incredibly surreal. I had all my friends at the Melbourne show but Sydney was fairly nervewracking when I stepped out. I didn’t actually get to meet Avicii for long at all during the tour shows. We only talked for a couple of minutes before the shows. His schedule is so jam packed and he only gets to the shows like 20 minutes before he plays. I’m working with the same company as him now so hopefully, I can meet him properly next time. WHAT WAS IT LIKE TRYING TO BALANCE THIS WHIRLWIND OF A CAREER AND SCHOOL? I’ve actually just finished school and a schoolies trip up in Byron Bay. Balancing both wasn’t as hard as I expected it to be. I thought it was going to be the year from hell because that’s what everyone says about it. But I absolutely loved it. My school was really, real accommodating. They all knew what was going on and they were really supportive of all the moves I was making. It was easy to go home, have a studio session for a couple of hours and then do all my homework as well which was really nice. If I didn’t have that support from both my family and my school, it would have been a different story entirely. DO YOU HAVE A FAVOURITE MIX OF YOURS THAT YOU LOVE TO PERFORM? Probably my Sam Smith remix. That’s the one that’s been received best, to date. I think it really sums up the music that I’m aiming to put out. It really sums up the dirty disco brand for me. Its disco for the modern generation, incorporating the old with the new. I think that really came out in that track. Sam Smith is an incredible artist. I haven’t found anyone that doesn’t like him yet. It was incredible to work with his vocals and it is such an inspiring track. The track came together pretty quickly. A friend of mine showed me the track and so I reached out to see if I could do a remix of the track. They had already 26

SMALLER CROWDS OF 20-30 PEOPLE CAN BE JUST AS DAUNTING AS THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE

done a remix package a few days before I had asked. It wasn’t official but we got the all clear from them to do a proper free release, which was nice. I didn’t get any feedback from Sam but just because it didn’t have that official tick of approval for official release. Hopefully he heard it though. WHAT DO YOU THINK MAKES YOUR MUSIC DIFFERENT TO WHAT IS ALREADY OUT THERE? For me, I think being able to play the guitar and being able to have a live instrument in the background is probably the most important thing. Like I said before, with the market becoming so saturated and the access to music making programs being so easy, it is so easy to just start typing things into the computer and make music, no matter how basic or complex it might be. So, I think being able to incorporate the live stuff has made the process a lot different to a lot of other people. Just being able to have a jam is something that is really important in today’s industry. Otherwise it is really easy to just get lost in button-pushing or a computer, which is how a lot of people work. The guitar gives me a lot of freedom in that aspect. I’m a hummer too and I’m always humming something so when I can transfer what’s in my head to the guitar, rather than just having to push a button, it has made it different for me. YOU’VE GOT A PODCAST UP AND RUNNING CALLED ‘DIRTY DISCO’. I’VE LISTENED TO IT AND IT’S GREAT! IS THAT THE KIND OF STUFF THAT WE CAN EXPECT TO HEAR WHEN AN EP COMES OUT? I think so. I mean my music is all over the place at the moment. I released ‘Push Up’ and thats really sort of hip-hoppy, disco sort of thing. But I think my live show will be a lot of funk sort of stuff and a lot of bigger tracks. More festival tracks and more chilled out groovy stuff like my Sam Smith remix. So probably everything from the Sam Smith remix to my remix of ‘You Make Me’, which is not bigger but more electro and hard-hitting is where my set is heading at the moment. But ideally for me, it would be amazing if I could have almost entirely my content. The plan for me is to just write and write for the next three months. Hopefully, I can come up with about 10 tracks, that are ready for release, so I can debut some of them at Future. Hopefully put them on guitar and do some live stuff with them as well. WHAT DO YOU ENJOY PRODUCING MORE; 20-30 SONG MASH-UPS OR YOUR OWN ORIGINAL TRACKS? Both are tough. I think I do get the most out of my original stuff though. There’s just something about making something from nothing. It is incredibly satisfying. I feel like any artist can relate to that. It is just such a surreal feeling. Starting off with absolutely nothing and maybe a couple of days later, you’ve got something ready for radio. It is just a weird process. It’s the same as any art form. Being able to finish something that didn’t exist before is the best thing for me. I mean, the mash-ups are awesome and a lot of fun. They can often be really inspiring and I learn a lot from those. But definitely doing the original stuff, being able to manipulate what’s in my head is the best. Being able to share that with others is what I enjoy most about it. IF YOU BUMPED INTO THE FUTURE YOU, WHAT IS THE FIRST QUESTION YOU WOULD ASK AND WHY? Oh wow. Ummm, probably, ‘Have I met Justin Timberlake yet?’ [laughs]. He’s my idol and he has been for like 10 years. So hopefully, one day I meet him. LAST SONG OR ALBUM YOU DOWNLOADED OR BOUGHT? Blind Heart by Cazzette. Oh, it is soooo good! THREE WORDS TO DESCRIBE THROTTLE? Dirty disco music. Monica Jankowski 28

MUSIC REVIEWS / BRADLEY COWAN

TY SEAGULL / MANIPULATOR If you were lucky enough to get yourself a ticket to December’s Meredith Music Festival then Ty Seagull is the one act you will probably remember from that bender of a weekend. Manipulator, Seagull’s eighth solo studio release has already received more positive press and chart success than all of his seven other albums combined. This Psychedelic rock release follows a similar path to Tame Impala’s Lonerism. Manipulator is bursting with a combination of heavy, trance-like guitar and sweet Californian vocals making it the ideal summer release. The lead single, ‘The Singer’ pretty much sums up the atmosphere of an Australian Summer festival. Just by turning it up you can imagine girls in their crop tops, flower crowns and long flowing hair swaying back and forth to the sound of Ty Seagulls melodies dipping their heads to his catchy tunes.

TV ON THE RADIO / SEEDS Since the release of TV on the Radio’s Epic 2006 album Return to Cookie Mountain, we have been waiting for the band to produce something of a similar high calibre. Finally three albums and eight years later, TV on the Radio deliver us Seeds, perhaps one of the most anticipated releases of this year. ‘Careful You’ mixes spacey synchs and a hollow beat to create an indie, styled track suitable for the club that has the potential to get even the Hipsters Twerking. Another track title ‘Happy Idiot’ follows suit once again presenting us with an Indie-dance track that could be from the 80’s or the future, either way it will be sure to get your body rolling to its pumping beat. Seeds is an album you need to plant in your music collection and let the twelve amazing tracks grow on you.

AZEALIA BANKS / BROKE WITH EXPENSIVE TASTE After presenting us with some of the crudest lyrics of 2011 with ‘212’, Azealia Banks has finally gotten around to releasing her debut album, Broke with Expensive Taste. It must have been a difficult task for Ms Banks to release this album so many years after she desensitised the rest of the world to the word cunt (Not Australia, that naughty word is old news to us). There was just so much hype built up around ‘212’ and you’re expecting an album filled with similar party hits then unfortunately Broke with Expensive Taste will leave you feeling bitterly disappointed. We all had such huge expectations for this New York rapper, however the only piece of this album that bares resemblance to the brilliance of ‘212’ is the explicit lyrics. Take the single ‘Chasing Time’ for example where the N-bomb is dropped more than your phone on a Saturday night.

SUPERFOOD / DON’T SAY THAT British four-piece Superfood have created quite the stir with the release of their debut album Don’t Say That. If we likened their music to baking a cake then it could perhaps contain a few too many ingredients that somehow equate to a rather delicious dessert. There are elements of hip hop, indie-rock and pop topped off with siren like vocals to create a very unique collection of songs. The icing on the cake comes in the form of the track ‘Superfood,’ also the title the band had chosen for themselves. This catchy, anthem-like number may have you cutting some mean shapes on the d-floor until you realise that it’s all about hunting through the kitchen cupboards after having one too many hits on the bong. No civil party is complete without a cake however, so next time you attend any form of celebratory event, take Superfood’s Don’t Say That along as your party favour. 29

FASHION / TORY PRICE

BLAK Apparel are bringing some of the freshest new threads to the Melbourne streets and the mountain scene. we love them for their street attitude and extremist lifestyles. their quality streetwear designs will keep you warm on the slopes, and looking fresh at the pub afterwards. We chatted to Andrew about it all. WHO IS BEHIND BLAK APPAREL? Kane Lowen and Andrew Buchan; two broke snowboarders trying to chase the dream! WHAT’S WITH THE OBSESSION WITH HEADWEAR? WHERE DID IT COME FROM? Kane and I have always had a thing for headwear, Kane has a cupboard full after a few years of buying far too many hats. After spending a couple of years of trying to dial it in and figure out how to get a break in the snow industry, this is what we have come up with. HOW HARD IS IT TO CONVINCE PEOPLE THAT SUCH A NICHE IDEA IS GOING TO WORK? We convinced each other and have never looked back! We’ve seen a large gap in the availability of fashionable headwear that is of good quality for the harsh mountain environment, whilst incorporating minimalistic street-wear designs to keep our edge. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE PEOPLE WEARING YOUR STUFF INTERNATIONALLY AND SPREADING THE WORD ABOUT BLAK APPAREL? It is amazing. It’s like watching your dream come true, it gives us goose bumps. The support we have received worldwide in such a short amount of time has blown our minds and makes all the sleepless nights and long days so worthwhile. MY HEAD IS OFTEN TOO BIG FOR HATS, DOES THAT MEAN I HAVE MORE BRAINS THAN MY SMALLER HEADED PEOPLE? WHOSE HEAD DO YOU USE TO MEASURE THE HATS ON? This is a highly possible statement. You are probably some form of extraterrestrial being, possibly from the same planet as Kane as he is also harboring an alien brain in his massive head. I, on the other hand have an extremely regular sized head, and our mate Boondi has a pin head. If we can get them to fit our heads, we can cater for anyone. 30

HITTING THE ROAD IN SEARCH OF BLUE SKIES, FRESH POWDER, GROOMED PARKS AND SOME OF THE BEST NIGHTS YOU’LL EVER HAVE WITH PEOPLE YOU HAVE NEVER MET 31

NEXT TIME YOU DO A SHOOT, I WANT IN. THE PIZZA, BEER AND BABES ARE RIGHT UP MY ALLEY! HOW DO I GET ON BOARD? We have formed a pretty awesome crew of loyal followers in a very short amount of time, this is the reason we love the snow and snow industry so much! We are always looking to involve the crew in any way we can and like to have a much fun as possible even during our “serious” times, so you’re always welcome to join! People will do anything for beer and pizza, it’s amazing! YOU USED INSTAGRAM TO RECRUIT YOUR TEAM FOR THE LATEST LOOKBOOK, WHY? HOW DID IT ALL WORK OUT? Well funny you should ask that! We got an awesome response from our Instagram shout out, but as it turned out it didn’t exactly go as planned. Luckily for us we had the help of a few legends who were able to show up within hours of a Sunday afternoon SOS, so we pulled it together and are absolutely stoked with the shots that we got from Brent Ellis Photographics and Scott Mulgrew Media. YOU HAVE SOME GNARLY SNOWBOARDING VIDEOS ON YOUR BLOG, IS THAT SO WE CAN ALL LEARN NEW TRICKS? We are just trying to spread the stoke of snowboarding. The videos we post are of shredders that are pushing the limits of snowboarding, or videos that we think depict what snowboarding is all about for us – doing what you love with like-minded people. Snowboarding is more than just a sport for us, it’s a lifestyle! VICTORIA GETS A BIT OF A BAD RAP SNOW WISE, WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS? Australia as a whole gets a bad rap for snow; expensive, busy, poor conditions, the list goes on. We absolutely LOVE it though, because what Australian snow fields lack in snow conditions, they make up for with the awesome people that are involved in the scene. From the back-to-back seasonal workers that work all summer to afford to be back on the mountain for the winter, to the first time “punters” that spend their entire weekend laying on their back. Everyone is there for the same reason, to have a great time! In saying that, when Mother Nature permits, the terrain of Australian snowfields is as good as anywhere. Last year saw Mt Perisher built a world-class terrain park and gained the attention it deserved from the world’s best snowboarders who spent their “off” season lapping the park and throwing down some insane tricks. DESCRIBE YOUR ULTIMATE WINTER DESTINATION? Hitting the road in search of blue skies, fresh powder, groomed parks and some of the best nights you’ll ever have with people you have never met. TELL ME WHY YOU FELL IN LOVE WITH THE SNOW? It’s the most addictive white substance known to man.

THE SUPPORT WE HAVE RECEIVED WORLDWIDE IN SUCH A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME HAS BLOWN OUR MINDS AND MAKES ALL THE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS AND LONG DAYS SO WORTHWHILE.

IN THE MOVIE ALIVE, A TRUE STORY DEPICTING THE URUGUAYAN RUGBY TEAM CRASHING IN THE ANDES IN THE MIDDLE OF A SNOW STORM AND HAVING TO SURVIVE BY EATING THOSE WHO DIED, DO YOU THINK IF IT CAME DOWN TO IT, YOU COULD BECOME A CANNIBAL? (WE SINCERELY HOPE THAT IT DOESN’T). We always have a bottle of Sriracha Hot Sauce on hand in case this ever happens. Hot sauce makes everything taste better, even human. ‘A man will do what a man has to do… to survive’. WHO’S COOLER, SNOWBOARDERS OR SKIIERS? We are not racist! ANY LAST WORDS TO CONVINCE THIS INTERVIEWER (WHOM HAS NEVER EVEN SEEN SNOW) TO GIVE IT A GO? You only live once, give it a go. But be prepared for the life of a ski bum, because the chances are you’ll be hooked forever.

SPONSORED BY OZ APPAREL OZAPPAREL.COM.AU

WWW.BLAKAPPAREL.COM 35

YOUR RUNDOWN OF THIS NEW YEAR’S

FESTIVAL ANTICS

Beyond the Valley? More like beyond the rain, wind, hail, tornados and shine – we finally had a festival. I really don’t know where to begin with this one, as it was a real mixed bag of interesting experiences. From the bus boy of the VIP bar trying to convince us that he was one of the owners while giving us free drinks and offering us the LUX VVIP tent. To witnessing campers trek back to their area, having only their esky still standing as the wind had flattened all the tents. DAY ONE We arrived the day of early birds, pushing our way through the battles of finding the right media bands, waiting for the correct directions and being escorted to our humble abode for the duration of our stay. As we dodged the rushed, hot sweaty workers – we finally set up for camp in the LUX VIP area. We threw around some beautiful fabrics, added some dream catchers and plotted Ellie the mascot in the middle of our hippie gypsy room. Besides the tornado, which was currently taking place, we found a comfy spot by the bar and began to drink. Looking around, it was intriguing to be partially involved in what happens behind the scenes of a festival, final paint jobs, filling of fridges, puffing of pillows and distributing hampers. This was the real deal. LUX VIP area was shmick and running with the high life material. We were toured around the area once the sun had decided to show its face, of day spa’s, private food stalls, bars serving cocktails, DJ’s and huge Tipi’s, for everyone to mingle in later on. Mingling is exactly what we did, with the first day’s music selection only being limited to Central Park Stage in the middle of GA camping grounds and VIP LUX stage. Still, the Central Park Stage delivered. The speakers were insane. The music rumbled the floor and we fist-pumped to Darude’s ‘Sandstorm’ well into our 11pm curfew. DAY TWO Under the weather had two meanings that morning. We were huddled in tents feeling sorry for ourselves, while it was pissing down with rain outside. Some legend drilled a tent peg into a “natural spring” so life was flooding and about to float away over the cliff and into the ocean. The main stage had been switched off and what we thought may have been cancellation due to bad weather, finally started to show some light. The afternoon rolled through and so did the beverages. First off the rank (and because of the time delays, everything became quite confusing): FRACTURES Slow and steady wins the race. Welcoming in the festival, chilling on the grass, under the pavilion tent listening to Fractures. They haven’t been around too long, but long enough to pull a crowd getting into the groove of things. We swayed around to some of their tunes, sinking beers while allowing our goose bumps to finally thaw out into a half attempt tan (and to think it was summer). They played the crowds favourites – ‘Twisted’, ‘Cadence’ and ‘Embers’. BALLPARK MUSIC These guys didn’t play until later on, but were on the main stage (once it had opened). Front left hand side, mint! They should be congratulated on getting the crowd going. We needed it after freezing out butts off. Shaking off the raindrops, we rocked out to ‘She Only Loves Me When I’m There’ and a couple of freshies, and of course some oldies like ‘Fence Sitter’. PEKING DUK Peking Duk were probably a highlight of the festival. They played well into the night, with a light show to accompany their act. Their set however was the outstanding part. They played all their crowd killers and of course ended it with ‘High’, but in between each of their songs, they would throw in a cheeky party number to get the crowds bits tingling for more. To emphasize the amazement 38

BEYON

ND THE VALLEY

of their set would be to mention that I was in my tent rocking out the entire time. I occasionally peered my head out to watch the set, but that how much they blew our jocks off. It also helped that our tent was practically pitched on the stage. I sound like a bit of a pussy bitch that I was already in my tent by 2am, but it didn’t help that both my little party animals had cooked it. DAY THREE ‘Wakey-Wakey, rise and shine.’ Happy New Year’s everyone. We were finally able to line up for our promised bacon and egg breakfast, which we were meant to receive every morning, but I think BTV had us on a fruit and muesli diet. They didn’t want us to look fat in their photos. I dragged party buddy number one to a few early numbers like Yumi Zouma, Holy Holy and Husky. I can’t tell you what they played, as we struggled to hear them on stage – but it got us into the vibe to get shit happening for New Years Eve. We wandered back to our friends drinking tent, smashed the liquid goodies and got back on the bandwagon. ONEDAY Australia’s newest and mintest super hip-hop group have formed to become One Day. With the likes of Spit Sindicate, Jackie Onassis, Horrorshow and Joyride, they have produced the most incredible song ‘Love Me Less’ which is what the crew and I head banged to. There was also ‘Leave Your Windows Open’ which is loads of fun. They were just an amazing set rolling us into New Years. CLAPTONE Ahhhh Claptone. He’s a deep house phenomenon and even though my dance buddies had dispersed, I kicked it up the front jumping up and down to his set. I love ‘Let’s Groove’ that much, that I got too excited finding people to dance with, that I missed most of it. I’ll follow him to his next set any day! ALLDAY He’s a babe. His voice is a babe. His songs are babe. He’s just an all round little legend, who apparently is quite a comedian too. ‘You Always Know The DJ’ is probably my favourite, but I was too mesmerized to even notice what he was singing to be honest. LOWLIGHTS Could have been Golden Features and could have been RÜFÜS. Two reasons why RÜFÜS sucked – they missed the countdown (the most important part of any New Year activity) and I honestly thought their vibe on stage was lacking for the New Year’s Eve band. And the Golden Boy. He’s honestly my favourite and that kid is going places, but he needs a dark room with lots of sound everywhere, so you can absolutely lose your mind to him. I don’t know. I just have had so much fun at every set and this one, mehh. All in all it was eventually a successful festival. It almost felt as though we were observing a puzzle slowly being put together, but it was intriguing and cool. I’m looking forward to seeing what 2015 entails. Sarah Long

FEILD DAY

Being a Field Day virgin, I had no idea what to expect from the event. I went in with high hopes, but not overly excited, and was fucking blown away. Field Day 2015 was epic! The event was held at The Domain in Sydney and the venue was perfect for the vibe of the day. The lush green grounds surrounded by the city skyscrapers gave it that little bit of extra magic. Best thing about the set-up was that everything had its place. All the food was kept along one side of the grounds, the toilets along the back and out of the way and bars and free water stations close to the stages but not close enough to get in the way. It was a stinking hot day too. Temperatures reached about 30 degrees at their highest but not sur-prisingly, it didn’t ruin anybody’s mood. There was plenty of shade in the form of trees and a 5 Seeds tent-type shed cloth over a bunch of picnic tables. Also, there was plenty of free water to go around, which is super impressive and probably one of the reasons that people behaved so re-laxed and chill. It was refreshing to be at a festival where people were just there to have a good time. Perfect way to spend the first day of the new year. HIGHLIGHTS PEKING DUK Peking Duk had the crowd eating out of the palm of their hands from the second they jumped on that main stage. They even persuaded the crowd to get on their knees, all close and sweaty with the people around them and jump up after a count down as a way to celebrate the last time they would ever mix Darude’s ‘Sandstorm’ into their set. They were energetic and they played all the favourites. Not one person could say a bad word about these guys. They nailed it. As expected. RÜFÜS Coming right after Peking Duk, was RÜFÜS and man, did they kill it! Their indie dance sounds were the perfect way to get the crowd relaxed after the energy of the Peking Duk set. The tone of their music went so well with the vibes that it almost brought myself and a few others to tears. As the temperature started to cool down and the wind began to blow, RÜFÜS brought that bit of warmth back to the crowd and set the atmosphere perfectly. My number one pick of the day. THE KITE STRING TANGLE Following a mint Milky Chance set, most of the crowd dispersed and either floated off to the main stage or went to grab a round of drinks. But TKST performed a set that was super impressive. Yeah, it’s hard to keep the crowd’s attention when your songs don’t have many lyrics, but I was taking the beats he gave in handfuls. Underrated, but so well done. LOWLIGHTS STAGE PROXIMITY The stages were set-up close enough to walk from one to the other in less than a minute but the issue with that was that you could hear the music coming from the other stages. It ruined the feel of the music and made it hard to concentrate on who you were there to see. Trying to listen to one act and hearing the main stage in the background was hard to deal with, especially when the other crowd cheers could be heard over the music right in front of you. It also made me feel like I was missing out.

DRINKS Alcoholic beverages at a festival will always be a low light for most unless one day, something is done to actually provide alcohol that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg to buy. $13 for a can of double black vodka and $6 for a bottle of water… $45 for three drinks and a water. For mid-strength alcohol and water. Lowest of all the lowlights. ARTIST CHOICE Leaving the crowd mid-way during a set to catch one at the side stage, one guy told me this is the best part and I’m missing out. It probably was and I probably did from the sound of other reviews, but that would be why it’s a lowlight in this list – too many goddamn good acts to choose from. Not the worst thing that could happen at a festival, but a sucky way to miss out on some solid acts. More shitty acts next time Field Day organisers please, so we don’t have to make such difficult de-cisions when we’re all having such a good time. WEIRD-LIGHTS FREE RUBBISH SERVICE This is something that tripped me out for a bit before someone explained the situation. I could swear that people, festival-goers were picking up rubbish and cleaning up the grounds. At first, there was only a couple, but by the end of the night, groups of people were going around cleaning up. I thought it must have been some type of punishment regime for those who were misbehaving. Turns out, some legends decided that the best way to get the grounds clean, were to offer the festival-goers free drinks for a certain number of empty cups and cans collected. Genius idea. Monica Jankowski

THE FALLS FESTIVAL What better way to ring in the New Year than by celebrating over a five day musical bonanza. Set in the same grounds as Splendour in the Grass just slightly smaller, the Falls Festival in Byron Bay is a perfect size and has two main stages each a short distance from each other. Added to this they had a Village area which was filled with yoga classes (excellent), comedy and random dance classes. Oh and haystacks to sit on. Lots of haystacks. So I bought the five day ticket and was a little anxious on how I would manage living it rough and four full nights in a tent. But nothing to fear, the whole experience was fantastic! HIGHLIGHTS KINGSWOOD The first two days were filled with smaller acts, but the highlight on the first day was Kingswood who brought the roof down with their smashing vocals, heavy beats and rock ‘n’ roll attitude. ALISON WONDERLAND She then played her best crowd-stomping tunes to bring in the New Year. Standing midway down the hill looking down at the lights, the crowds was really something special. Nothing will ever beat dancing in the rain with great tunes and lightning striking all around. The third night was finished by La Roux and Empire of the Sun. I loved La Roux and even though she hasn’t released many songs recently, she still got the crowd going. Empire of the Sun put on a visually impressive set, however the songs and band themselves just didn’t seem good enough to headline the New Year’s Day line-up. BLUEJUICE Of course all this was just a warm up for the final day which was to put it mildly, the greatest music day EVER. Bluejuice kicked off in their final gig and must have attracted everyone in the festival, and they got everyone in the party mood. A few favourites were Glass Animals who played songs from their latest album and moved the crowd to even dizzier heights (yep, someone climbed the metal poles). Unfortunately they clashed a bit with Milky Chance! The lead front man has limited English so didn’t really have any banter with the crowd but their songs spoke for themselves and they played a great set with all the hits from their album Sadnecessary. Moving on to SBTRKT later in the evening played on the Valley stag and had a dark sultry set. ALT-J And finally… the cherry on top, Alt-J. As a fan of their music I expected to enjoy their gig, but in all honesty it was mind-blowing. The music was amazing; the light show was spot on and perfectly complimented the alternative lyrics and mysterious vibe that they inhibit. We could only see their silhouettes for most of the show and it just WORKED. In my opinion it was by far the best show of the entire festival (and possibly ever) and the best way possible to end a fantastic week of music. WEIRD-LIGHTS Apart from the music the Falls had plenty of other surprises, including a secret dancing space behind the giant Brain light on the hill, acts of absurdities in 46

the village, sexy whip lessons, ten minutes discos, silent discos and yoga in the morning, making sure there was always something to do. LOWLIGHTS Any complaints? Well the valley stage hill was one of the toughest climbs I’ve had to do over and over and over again. Also NO BOOZE ALLOWED IN CAMPGROUNDS! Pro tip for next year – bring alcohol they barely even check. Buying expensive drinks there is a pain because the ticket is so expensive. That said, it’s a fantastic festival with an awesome vibe. Everyone is very chill and friendly, right down to the police taking selfies with excited festival goers. For those dubious of the expense of it and the effort of living in a tent for five whole days, I say throw aside any doubts, arm yourself with an open mind and a smile and get ready to fall in love with Falls! Zoe Bradley

SEXY SURFERS Female surfers are using their sexuality to become noticed.

Being a role model is an extremely tough tag to live with. It’s one that is seldom asked for, yet enforced by all. Being particularly good at a sport is not reason enough for children to look up to you. Australia has become victim of its own sporting culture in this regard, as professional sports people are often forced to be trained in how to handle themselves with the media, and the public. So let’s pretend your sport isn’t recognised by all, and you’re a part of the less-famous gender competing in it. Is getting noticed always an act which can be performed ethically? This is the problem that a lot of young female surfers are finding themselves in. A sport that takes place on the beach, usually in very fine weather, and professional surfers have very fine physiques. It was only a matter of time before someone traded a wetsuit in for a bikini and got captured on camera. Sex sells, it’s always been that way, and it will probably always be the most successful marketing technique. Getting noticed, with your name out there, is probably the hardest part of starting out in any line of work. If you have something that sets you apart from your main competition, then you have to exploit that to its full potential. In this case, it’s women that look a whole lot better in a bikini than men do. 50

If I was asked to name more than three female surfers, as someone who doesn’t follow the sport intensely, I would struggle. Layne Beachley and Stephanie Gilmore are about as far as my ‘expertise’ goes. The only reason these names spring to mind is because they have reached the ultimate success, with Beachley being the best there’s ever been. Any up-and-comer has no hope being recognised in a sport which already gets very limited coverage for a country which is surrounded by surf. Another sport very few people knew existed was women’s gridiron. Someone in the know was obviously aware of this fact and replaced uniforms with underwear, and the lingerie league was formed. All of a sudden you have full stadiums, world tours, and much wealthier sportswomen. Doesn’t seem to be a whole bunch of losers in that equation is there? The only opposition comes from a flimsy politically correct group of individuals who wish these women didn’t have to bare skin to be successful. Now I in no way intend to make fun of women’s sport here, because I really do find some of it entertaining, but unless it’s a sport you love, the male version is always going to be more appealing. Men are playing to their (physical) strengths,

so why do women get criticized for playing to one of theirs? Go to Google and search Ellie-Jean Coffey (guys thank me later). She is an up-and-coming surfer who has discovered another way to ensure she gets great sponsorship deals. She has accumulated a fan base of over 231,000 followers on Instagram, just by taking selfies with her Billabong equipment. Her fan base may be prominently male, but she has found a way to secure an early sponsorship deal, which will fund her pathway to becoming a professional surfer. That would possibly have to be the quickest way to earn a paycheck that I have ever come across. A click of her phone’s camera and this week’s wage is looked after, with heaps of time left to follow her dream. This isn’t to say the successful don’t occasionally play the sex card as well. Gilmore is no stranger to magazines in various stages of undress: from competition wetsuit to a tastefullyshot nude cover. They may all be done for separate reasons, but each one of these girls is building their own brand, all of which will be associated with their name. None of these decisions would be entered into half-heartedly, so maybe people shouldn’t roll their eyes so quickly at this suggestion.

PHOTO: Ellie-Jean Coffey Should women have to get their wetsuits off more often than men to be noticed? In a perfect world, no they should not. But in a perfect world, we would all be forced to sit down and watch equal amounts of men and women’s sport, with both organisations to split profits evenly. People have to get their heads out of the clouds and take the world as it is, not how they would like it to be. I don’t watch female surfing, but I know who Ellie-Jean Coffey is. Trailblazers don’t have to be popular, they just make the path a whole lot easier for others to walk on after them. Mitchell Pascoe 51

SKYE HARRINGTON I have never been one for words. Rather, I have always felt, as clichéd as it is, ‘pictures speak louder than words’. Whether it’s in editorials or exhibitions I have never felt the need to read articles or descriptions, instead only need to read the image for all it has to say. I have always loved photography as an art form, particularly admiring portraits, but rather taking landscape photography. Portraits can create such a diverse array of sensuality and rawness that I love looking at. Capturing the essence and innocence of a person is truly a beautiful thing. If you capture the true essence of somebody in a single frame, I feel like you can have a whole biography, there, right in front of you. What I love capturing with landscape photography is the naturally formed textures and colours in the surroundings, especially those created by sunsets or night-lights. I’ve travelled far and wide, however, my favourite place in the whole world is Wilsons Prom in Victoria. We have gone there every year since we were kids. Wilsons Prom is an incredibly beautiful place, which I have tried to capture in this series. skye.harrington@gmail.com

FILM REVIEWS / NICHOLAS IVANOVIC

NIGHTCRAWLER 5/5 In 1976, Martin Scorsese shocked the world with his film Taxi Driver, about a disturbed outsider who becomes obsessed with wanting to purge the streets of its human ‘filth’. Nightcrawler is the modern day Taxi Driver. It stars as Jake Gyllenhaal as Lou Bloom, a compulsive thief who stumbles into the dark world of freelance video, selling gruesome footage of car accidents and murders to a local news station. But as the viewer’s demand for ‘urban violence’ grows, Bloom’s methods for getting footage starts to become questionable. Gyllenhaal is pure sociopath; he has no regard for human life beyond his own and is willing to destroy anyone that gets in his way. Both the film and Gyllenhaal’s reptilian physical appearance will get under your skin, yet Gyllenhaal is so perfectly cast that you can’t help but to keeping watching. Equal parts disturbing and brilliant.

EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS 2.5/5 Exodus: Gods and Kings is the latest in the series of biblical films that seem to be all the rage right now. Directed by Ridley Scott, it tells the story of a onceproud general of the Egyptian army, Moses (Christian Bale), who is exiled upon the royal family learning of his Hebrew heritage. He returns nine years later to liberate his people from the Pharaoh, Ramesses the Great (Joel Edgerton). As you would expect in a Scott film, the visuals and scope of the film are grand and epic. Additionally, it has an impressive supporting cast that includes Sigourney Weaver, Ben Kingsley and Aaron Paul. But the development of characters, including Moses who goes from royal to underground resistance fighter, doesn’t feel believable enough for viewers to really rally behind his cause and the film tends to drag. Ridley Scott has yet to make a film that matched his earlier masterpieces such as Gladiator or Blade Runner.

THE DROP 3.5/5 The final film of an actor is often heavily scrutinised to see if it is worthy of being their ‘send off’ film. The Drop is the final starring role of James Gandolfini, who was immortalised in his role as Tony Soprano in The Sopranos. He plays Marv, who runs a bar in Brooklyn with his cousin Bob (Tom Hardy). It also operates as a ‘drop bar’ where criminals launder money. When the bar is robbed one night, the Chechen mafia demand their money back and want answers to the breach of their seemingly bulletproof operation. Both Gandolfini and Hardy give very strong performances in this tightly structured crime-drama, where both characters have to face their own prospective dark pasts and question each other’s loyalty and ambitions. It has more character depth than most crime films and doesn’t tarnish Gandolfini’s legacy, but doesn’t really add to it beyond his role of a mafia boss.

THE WATER DIVINER 3/5 Russell Crowe’s directorial debut starts off without a hitch. We’re thrown headfirst into the battle of Gallipoli – a scene that shouts ‘Aussie Epic’ on the most tremendous scale - something we’ve rarely seen in Australian cinema in the last two decades. But after the opening credits run, we realise we’re in for a different beast, as we arrive on a farm in outback Australia, something just screams ‘Aussie Soap’ something we’ve seen way too much of of late. The result is a very choppy film that seems to trudge along (is it the end yet?), switching between Epic to Soap with each intermittent act. This isn’t to say this isn’t a good film, because it is enjoyable; the Epic scenes are incredible, we see a side of war, an intensity we rarely see in any film. Decent performances all round, the stand-outs being from Crowe, Ryan Corr and popular Turkish actor Yilmaz Erdogan in his first Englishlanguage feature. All in all, a decent, well made, beautifully shot film and worth a watch for those inclined. 57

THE COMBACK OF THE DRIVE IN Drive-in cinemas, rooftop cinemas, and the traditional meaning of watching a movie are coming back in fashion. Have we been longing for this?

Seeing movies used to be an experience – a night, or an afternoon, on the town with friends, family or your significant other. A film complex was the only place you could go to see the newest films fresh out of Hollywood – or in some cases a few months after it was fresh out of Hollywood. Prior to the invention of television and the debut of VHS, going to a film complex was the only place you could see a film full stop. It was like the theatre, you go to a venue, you watch it, you enjoy it, you may never see it again. VHS offered ways to watch films in the comfort of your own home whenever you wanted, and more recently DVD, Blu-Ray and legal (and illegal) digital downloads offer the same flexibility with your movie-watching needs. These days, going to see a movie at a complex isn’t the only way to see the newest films – for the last ten years or so illegal, or ‘pirated’ films, either on disc or downloaded from the internet, has become a common way for many to see Hollywood’s latest offerings without having to leave the comfort of their own homes or shell out any money. Slowly, watching films became less of an experience and less of a luxury. It became a common, cheap and often 58

free every-day occurance. However, seeing a movie is slowly beginning to become an experience again, with ticket sales slowly climbing again. I attended a screening of the classic 1966 Spaghetti Western film The Good, The Bad and The Ugly at my favourite movie house in Melbourne, the Astor Theatre (which, unfortunately is set to close down in a mere couple of months). To my surprise the cinema was full. And, I mean, absolutely chock-a-block! I was incredibly surprised to see so many people seeing a film that has been readily available on home video for decades at a cinema. So I know that there are still people out there that appreciate the true meaning of seeing a movie and making an experience out of it. The Astor Theatre, pretty much the last remaining movie palace in Melbourne, and Australia at that, won’t be around much longer and will mark a dying breed – the end of what began the ‘experience’. There’s nothing quite like sitting in an actual large theatre (not a cinema) and enjoying a film or two. Of course, a cinema or movie palace (modern or Art-Deco such as The Astor) isn’t the only complex you can

go to see your favourite old films, or the most brand-spankin’-new ones and have an experience just as incredibe– there are a handful of other movie-watching options available out there. Some of which have made a slow resurgence over the last few years and which, I believe, have lead to the slow return of the movie-going audience. There’s also the good ol’ drive-in cinemas. The drive-ins hit their peak during the teenage sexual revolution in the late-50s / early 60s, even though they’ve been around since the 1930s. Going to see a film at the drive-in is not only a great place to take a date, giving yourself and your significant other your own private space to watch a film together or to… do whatever else you feel the need to do, but is also incredibly convenient for a cheap night out for a large family – one fee (in most cases you pay per-car) and plenty of privacy for those with youngins’ (who can crash on the back seat when they get tuckered out). I’ve been to the driveins many times, in both situations and if you can find a drive-in near you, it’s worth a try at least once in your life. But therein lies the problem – there’s not a lot of these gems around, in fact there’s only three in Victoria (Coburg,

Dandenong and Dromana) and notso-surprisingly, their attendance is never huge. Drive-ins, of late, have sort of been pushed to the wayside, having been out-shined by their more-modern predecessors, roof-top cinemas and open-air cinemas. Both of these types of cinema offer practically the same experience as the drive-ins – seeing a movie, late at night under the stars. Roof-tops and open-airs don’t offer as much privacy but they’re still a great fun and intimate event where you can see your old favourites throughout the Summer months. Again, there aren’t a lot of these around – the only ones I really know of are the Roof-Top Cinema on Swanston Street, Melbourne and the Moonlight Cinemas open-air program at Botanic Gardens and Parks around Australia during the Summer months. These sessions usually sell-out, and really show that people are once again willing to pay to see movies they’ve seen a million times before in the comfort of their own homes

– people are willing to pay for the experience. One cinema experience I could never recommend is Gold Class – don’t get me wrong – awesome cinemas and chairs and whatever, but I don’t need to hear you clinking your cutlery together or see you (I’m looking at you waiters) walking in front of me every five minutes. Movies really are made to be ‘experienced’ and not just to be watched on your laptop or iPad at home. There’s a reason they throw so much money into films – the bigger the film, the better the experience. So make me one promise this Summer, take yourselves to the cinemas, experience movies the way they’re meant to be experienced – with your family or friends, your girl or your boy. Whether it be open-air, drive-in, regular cinema or one final visit to Melbourne’s soon-to-be-gone movie palace, just do yourselves a favour and have a bit of fun! Dave Lee

ELEPHANTS: ANIMALS OR ENTERTAINMENT? After the shocking incident of an elephant killing its trainer in Thailand, the age-old question of whether or not wild animals should be used as entertainment is once again brought to life.

A baby is born, raised lovingly by its mother for the first few fragile years of it’s life, and then when that baby starts to show signs of strength and beauty, it is suddenly taken, stolen, from it’s mother, it’s family. It is kidnapped of the right to live the life it was designed for. What on earth am I talking about? Elephants. Wild and free animals that have been forced into the entertainment world by humans. Do these elephants have a say? Of course not. Are they free to leave when carrying humans on their backs for the human’s pleasure becomes too much? Nope. They are nothing more than slaves to human beings and their wishes and desires. Welcome to the sad, yet true, reality of one of millions of elephants scattered across Asian countries, and whose sole purpose in life is to make tourists happy. A couple of months ago, news that an elephant killed its trainer with two tourists on its back sent animalrights activists and the like into an uproar. The death of this trainer could have been prevented if the elephant was never forced into the Thai entertainment industry. Perhaps this devastating incident serves as a reminder that elephants are wild animals, not the main attraction for tourist’s amusement and delight. This particular event involved an elephant trampling its trainer to death and then taking off running with a 60

Russian mother and her nine-year-old daughter still on its back. Thai police revealed the elephant was eventually caught nearly two kilometers away with the tourists unharmed and still atop its back. There is no denying that this would have been a terrifying ordeal for the mother and daughter, and of course the trainer whose life was suddenly cut short. However, to point a finger at the elephant and demand for it to be euthanised is beyond ridiculous. Nobody in their right mind would lump the blame on an innocent animal whose natural instinct and natural right, is to be wild and free in wide, open spaces. A chief policeman disclosed this elephant had never attacked anyone whilst working for the tourist company for the past two years. Countless animal rights organisations have been crusading for the rights of animals such as elephants and this specific case is just one of many. World Animal Protection explains the horrors elephants in tourist entertainment endure, such as cruel and intensive training. They are chained and denied interaction with other elephants and from the moment they are kidnapped they live their whole life in captive conditions that cannot meet their needs. I personally have never been one for animals in entertainment, but when I went to Africa a couple of years ago, that notion was definitely cemented.

When I saw free and happy elephants roaming through the Masaai Mara without a care in the world, it made me inexplicably happy to see these beautiful animals in their natural habitat. This experience also caused me to become a little upset too, as I sadly realised that not all elephants had this basic right. My first thought when I think of an elephant is the moment I had in Africa, not an innocent elephant forced to walk kilometer after kilometer with some annoying tourist on its back. I guess nobody will ever truly know what was the motive behind this elephant’s sudden change of character. Though it is not too difficult to figure out. I for one have a rough idea of why that poor elephant finally ‘snapped.’ Nobody, human or animal, deserves to be forced into anything they never want to do. We all have choices and rights, even animals, and it is such a crime when the supposed smarter and more powerful beings that are humans, violate those rights. * World Animal Protection has a website where over 11000 Australians have already pledged to be animal friendly tourists. Make the pledge yourself at: http://www. worldanimalprotection.org.au Mia Beverley Francisco

CHEEKY CHAPTERS / SARAH LONG

FUCK NO Never settle for second best.

He was a clear ‘fuck no’ from the beginning, or at least my sober self could have warned me. But good old beer goggles for days begged to differ. At the time he was Mr. Perfect, with an accent that would melt my warm fuzzy bits. But as I awoke the next morning, it all changed. He was somewhere between 5’ – 5’11 and claimed to be a chiseled male model, with a smile as though he had been smacked in the face with Colgate. Maybe that’s why I was lured in so easily like a little fishy chasing it’s bait across the dance floor of the club. Whether he was interested or not, I had become a self-proclaimed cupid, setting myself up with a lad. He pranced over asking for a dance, and I caved. We face fucked for the remainder of the night. I took my English-speaking stranger home with me (he begged for ‘cuddles’), under strict conditions that if he tried to sleep with me, there would be fighting words. The next morning I woke and it was as though the wicked witch had cast a spell on my vagina, because that little motherfucker closed up shop and swallowed the key. There was no way that any part of this male was getting inside those chained up doors. I can’t explain how or why it happened, but it’s not the first time. Whenever he 62

tried to touch me, I could feel little bits of last night’s liquids slowly trying to make its way up my throat. This was not good. It was time for him to move on. I had stupidly given him my phone number and Facebook the night before, as we had planned to hold hands, do cute shit and go see some waterfalls together for our first date, so once he departed out my door, it wasn’t the end of a cheeky chapter. We messaged back and fourth for a few days, while I tried the ‘distant’ tactic of not giving him much, but that didn’t work. So then I built up the courage to tell him that I wasn’t into him and he was wasting his time. Now, if I had received that message, I would have quietly thanked the person on the other end for saving me from any more humiliation and off I would go, on my way. He didn’t, he persisted again to tell me he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend, and he just wanted to hang out. It was starting to get really fucking annoying. Then one afternoon when I was bored out of my brain, I finally caved. I needed some attention (rookie). We hung out. The hanging out ended up happening a couple more times of him trying to hold my hand along the beach and carve our names in rocks. My self-proclaimed cupid had

seriously dug that arrow deep into Pommy, because he was all loved up. It was time to rip that arrow out and break some hearts. Me, being a little pussy bitch decided to do it over the phone. He didn’t react too well, pulling the ol’ ‘you’re a weirdo’, ‘you’re too serious’, ‘you’re making me look like a douche-bag’ in a volatile manner. My response? ‘I think we just have conflicting nationalities’ before hanging up on him. While reflecting on our lovely phone conversation – I began having doubts. I had recently been called an ice queen, not giving guys the chance to even breathe, so maybe I should have given it a proper go? After all, he was really nice, sweet and totally into me. So he would probably treat me right? Yeah? Pretty sure every female has had that thought about a best male mate. Meanwhile having my temporary epiphany, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed to be welcomed by a relevant sentence. ‘Think about this for a moment: Why would you ever choose to be with someone who is not excited to be with you?’ – Mark Manson Fuck me Mark, you’re on the money pal. Why would Pom Pom boy want

to be with me, when he knows that I would rather carry a boulder and some dead seagulls down the beach, than hold his hand? Mark then proceeds to explain how there’s a grey area in dating that many people get hung up on, being an area where feelings are ambiguous or one person has stronger feelings than the other. Which can cause a huge question of whether to be persistent and continue pursuing the other, when they only seem to be lukewarm about the idea. Manson states, ‘Much of it gets exceedingly analytical, to the point where some men and women actually spend more time analysing behaviours than actually, you know, behaving.’ So if you’re sitting there analysing everything that has happened, trying to make sense of whether you like someone or not, or more importantly whether they like you – then clearly it’s already a lost cause. Why would you ever be excited to be with someone who is not excited to be with you? If they’re not happy with you now, what makes you think they’ll be happy to be with you later? Why do you make an effort to convince someone to date you when they make no effort to convince you? What does that say about you? That you

believe you need to convince people to be with you?

unenthused by all of those around you.’

In other words, where’s your selfrespect?

‘The second problem is people who never meet others who feel a “Fuck Yes” for them. If all of the people you pursue give you a mild responses, or outright rejections, then it’s time to focus on improving yourself. Ask yourself, what is it about yourself that would inspire others to say “Fuck Yes” about you? If the answer is not obvious, then you get to work. Build yourself into a person others would say “Fuck Yes” to.’

Mark Manson explains that, ‘The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” implies that both parties must be enthusiastic about the prospect of one another’s company. Why? Because attractive, non-needy, high self-worth people don’t have time for people who they are not excited to be with and who are not excited to be with them.’ It also extends past just relationships, as, ‘The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” is applicable to dating, sex, relationships, even friendships. You may have absolutely nothing in common with that babe of a barman. But they’re hot and are interested in getting down. Is it a ‘Fuck Yes!’ for sex? It is? Then game on.’ Time to get your bits sticky. But the real beauty of The Law of ‘Fuck Yes or No,’ is that it simplifies the problems you can have in your dating life. When applying The Law of ‘Fuck Yes or No,’ there are really only two problems one can have. Manson states, ‘The first problem is people who never feel a “Fuck Yes” for anybody they meet. If you are lukewarm on absolutely everyone you meet, then either your demographics are way off, or you suffer from a lack of vulnerability and are protecting yourself by remaining indifferent and

And that’s how Mark, the legend, nails dating advice on the head, for every single human in any sort of relationship wandering around on this earth. It’s all about self-improvement, as everything else is a distraction. It’s a futile battle in the grey area, a prolonged ego trip. Because, yes even though you can use the right strategies to con some babe into sleeping with you, dating you, or even marrying you, means you may have won the battle, but lost the war of long-term happiness. So if you play the role of Pom Pom – call it a day. No need to have your confidence crushed anymore. And if you’re in the other shoes spending more time thinking , rather than doing – because you don’t know what to do, then it’s time to apply the rule. Read more of Mark Manson’s brilliance here.

JOIN THE CONVERSATION TWITTER / @BLAIRE_MAGAZINE FACEBOOK / FACEBOOK.COM/BLAIREMAGAZINE INSTAGRAM / @BLAIREMAGAZINE WWW.BLAIREMAGAZINE.COM