Lead Up for Women Jan Feb 2020

JANUARY-FEBRUARY 2020

Meredith Allan, CEO, Marketing Coach, Certified Dream Coach, Inspirational Public Speaker, and Host of The Meredith Show

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M A K T I P S TO E FEEL YOUR L E AS I I F E ER

Extraordinary Leadership takes clarity, commitment, and courage Meredith Allan talks about BEing the Light and what it takes to Lead Up and Shine Bright!

CONNECT. INFLUENCE. LEAD. leadupforwomen.com

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We are storytellers, dreamers, and adventurers. To us, the journey is just as important as the destination.

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Contents January • February 2020

Owned & Operated by Women’s Association, LLC Mailing Address PO 3908 Suwanee, GA 30024 Editorial Contributing Writer Rochelle Brandvein rochelle@brandveinpr.com 636.530.7225 Website & technical Support Shapeshift World Lorenzo@shapeshiftcompany.com 480.886.8005 PR social@leadupforwomen.com 602-730-5121 Social Media Amplified Social Marketing ashlyn@amplifiedsocialmarketing.com 480-848-0927 Membership Information membership@leadupforwomen.com 602-730-5121

Extraordinary Leadership takes clarity, commitment, and courage

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LEADERSHIP

4 Founder’s Corner Gaining clarity in 2020

BUSINESS

General Inquiry info@leadupforwomen.com 602-730-5121

5 Ambassadors 18 Finding Your Way Helpful hints for your leadership career path

Art Director BOC design, Inc. brent@bocdesigninc.com 404-402-0125 Circulation/Subscriptions subscriptions@leadupforwomen.com

14 What are you waiting for?

20 All for one

LUFW Management: Colleen Biggs: Chief People Officer colleenb@leadupforwomen.com 480-241-3708

LIFESTYLE

PHILANTHROPY

David Corson: Operations Manager davidc@leadupforwomen.com 404-931-6569 Lead Up for Women General Inquiry 602.730.5121 membership@leadupforwomen.com

26 A Pivotal Space Do good. Be better.

Lead best.

30 10 Tips to make your life feel easier

24 The Secret to a Passionate, Purposeful Life

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12 Embracing your ‘enoughness’ 5 ways burlesque can positively impact every area of your life

28 The most important resolution you’ll ever make

Lead Up for Women

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Founders Corner

Gaining clarity in 2020 Happy New Year! As we move into another decade, I want to reflect on past accomplishments and what I want to accomplish over the next 10 years. To do this, we must first understand what it is we are reaching for. In order to have the vision, we must have the clarity to create that vision. This year, we will focus conversations around gaining clarity to be, to have and to do more.

The first step is to show up.

I would like to challenge each of you to show up in your life for those who matter, those who need you and those who are waiting to hear your message.

Think big this decade. Take action on your vision. Be unapologetic for the success and joy it brings to you and so many who surround you. We exist to empower you to “Show Up” as “You” every day, but we know that is not as easy as it sounds.

This is why we are compelled to build several platforms to give you what you need to thrive in life, not just survive anymore. There is no need to feel as if you are stuck behind closed doors anymore. We provide the support, the community of experts, and the tools to remove the masks, leave the cloaks in the closet, and be you, in all your beauty, every day, everywhere, all the time.

Because you are worth it.

We are passionate and focused on what we can do to Connect, Influence and Lead every woman, and know we all long to belong and to have a community that accepts and celebrates our identities. We have worked diligently to create an organization for all women looking to lead without permission, be the badass leader you know you are, and gain the courage and confidence through the strong support of our group of women so you can live your best life.

We are here to show you how to tap into your greatest power, “You.” You are the only you that has ever been and the only you that will ever be. Be you and be strong, because you are brilliant and the world needs you. All of the members of Lead Up for Women are here to offer you support and sisterhood to leading your best life and the journey starts today.

What are you waiting for? Join us.

With Gratitude,

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Lead Up for Women

January-February 2020

Your Guide to

Successful Franchise Matching

Find Your Perfect Franchise Careyann Golliver is known as America’s Franchise Matchmaker™.

Her greatest passion is people to take the leap into franchising. Her passion began from helping grow her local family handyman business to the top-rated national franchise in the industry. The franchise family business became so successful that in 2019 it was acquired by the largest retailer-owned hardware cooperative in the world-Ace Hardware Corporation.

Careyann and Franchise Logic has mastered a process that not only helps people find their perfect franchise match but allows for an abundance of possibilities.

We’re here to support your journey as you begin to explore opportunites in discovering the perfect franchise.

Contact us to find out how you can start today!

303.805.5078 • franchise-logic.com

Lead Up for Women hits the radio waves every week Whomever makes the statement that endless opportunity don’t exist needs to stop limiting themselves by the beliefs that exist between their ears. Our goal with Lead Up for Women is to empower as many women as we can to be the best version of themselves.

Having a radio station allows us to do just that. Voiceamerica™ is the single largest producer of original internet talk radio programming in the world, with unparalleled scope and reach, which is why we teamed up with them.

On March 27, 2019, we launched Speak Up to Lead Up with Host Colleen Biggs. Are you ready to lead without permission and take the steps needed to live your best life? Whether you want to start the business of your dreams, learn the steps you need to take so you can love what you do, or celebrate your present and future accomplishments, our radio show help take you there. Each episode dives into deeper subjects as we interview weekly guests who have already

walked in your shoes. Let the experts guide you for a clearer path to your most successful future.

Our show is the perfect platform for all of our members to advertise their businesses, network and hear about upcoming events. We also recap of all of our monthly luncheons around the nation. With millions of listeners, we have the opportunity to pioneer change for women today, as well as in the future.

We invite you to tune in to Lead Up for Women: Speak Up to Lead Up, as we celebrate the influence of women in business and beyond. Colleen speaks with guests who have stories to share, have faced adversity and are bona fide success stories in business, their communities and personal accomplishments.

Join the strong and the brilliant ones and understand that the world is ready for you to be at your best. Listen to Lead Up for Women: Speak Up to Lead Up, live every Wednesday at 10 a.m. (PST) on the VoiceamericaTM Empowerment Channel. Visit www.voiceamerica.com/ show/3872 to bookmark the show and listen live each week.

Do you have someone in mind that you feel would be a great interview on the show? Do you have a mentor, coach or sponsor? Have you been inspired by an amazing leader, entrepreneur, employer or friend? If so, we want to hear from you.

Please submit their name(s), contact information and why you feel they would be the perfect guest for the show to info@leadupforwomen.com.

As the world’s largest producer of Internet talk radio programming, Voiceamerica™ can put your brand in front of millions of active listeners. If you are interested in getting your name out to millions of listeners, contact Tacy Trump, Executive Producer of Voiceamerica™ Tacy.trump@voiceamerica.com or 480.294.6421 for sponsorship package pricing.

Sponsorship Rates Full

Quarter

» 13-week sponsorship of show series » 30-second spot (production included) played 6 times (3 during live broadcast and 3 during rebroadcast) » 30-60 second video spot (content must be provided) » Banner ad on weekly eCard » Opening & closing billboards on show » One live mention by host » Banner ad on host page » Banner ad on host personal/business website » Possible guest appearance by key person within company (subject to host approval)

» 13-week sponsorship of show series » 30-second spot (production not included) played 2 times ( 1 during live broadcast and 1 during rebroadcast) » One live mention by host » Banner ad on host page » Banner ad on host personal/business website » Possible guest appearance by key person within company (subject to host approval)

Half

Optional Advertising for Half and Quarter Sponsors

» 13-week sponsorship of show series » 30-second spot (production not included) played 4 times (2 during live broadcast and 2 during rebroadcast) » One live mention by host » Banner ad on host page » Banner ad on host personal/business website » Possible guest appearance by key person within company (subject to host approval)

» 13-week sponsorship of show series » Audio commercial production » 30-60 second video (content must be provided) » eCard banner ad

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Lead Up for Women

January-February 2020

Extraordinary Leadership takes clarity, commitment, and courage Meredith Allan talks about BEing the Light and what it takes to Lead Up and Shine Bright!

Give us a snapshot of your brand?

If you are looking to take your business and life to the next level, I am your woman. I am a professional motivational speaker, executive coach and I lead a private Mastermind. After 20 years as a TV anchor and journalist, I launched my own marketing, media and publicity company because I am passionate about the power of sharing people’s stories.

I have been helping clients get major publicity and create powerful memorable messaging for over a decade now.

I am also a certified “Make Your Dreams Come True” coach. Serving my audiences and clients is extremely rewarding. I serve clients all over the world from my hometown in Los Angeles.

I am truly living my dreams. These days, I lead both new and seasoned successful business owners to their personal and professional breakthroughs. I believe we are never arriving at a “destination,” but rather continuously transforming for the better. We are also so much more than our work. We are powerful friends, family and community members.

Everything I teach and speak about on stages centers around leadership. Clarity, commitment, and courage are the pillars of my International Mastermind. It fascinates me that more people are not aware of the positive impact a mastermind can have on your business and life. It is essentially a group where we collectively solve problems, and benefit from ongoing leadupforwomen.com

professional education and shared resources in order to reach a higher success. The beauty of the mastermind is it is about giving and being of service to the group. If we are being honest, we can only achieve a certain level of success on our own. But if you participate in a Mastermind, the collective success can be limitless. Extraordinary breakthroughs are achieved in Mastermind and it is truly my favorite work.

I am also leading two-day transformational leadership events throughout the year in Los Angeles and overseas.

Tell us what makes your brand so unique?

I am a broadcast journalist who fell in love with storytelling in high school. I am honestly always looking at how I can help people tell their stories in a more powerful way. I can get obsessed with connecting my clients and friends. We are nothing without each other. For years, my favorite way to close a broadcast has been, “If you know someone who is out there doing something amazing, please don’t keep it to yourself—take a little bit of time and share the love.”

What type of person are you targeting?

I work with ambitious clients looking to take their work to a higher level of performance. I help them strengthen their story and gain the brand recognition they deserve. I love coaching corporate executives and business owners on the

mindset, marketing and connections critical to allow them to play bigger. I am not for everyone. In fact, I believe in radical honesty and will not accept excuses from my clients or “playing small” from anyone. I require 100% commitment. My clients often have massive breakthroughs and success.

When I speak at events people naturally get motivated in my trainings and want to be connected and supported in a bigger way. In 2020, I am putting on major events to fill the demand for workshops, more connections and leading a dream mastermind.

Why do you do what you do?

I discovered long ago that when I share my light, people mirror it back.

My greatest gift is reminding people that their dreams not only matter, but they are always possible. We cannot do it all on our own. Sharing my media and publicity connections with clients is a privilege. There is nothing more rewarding than helping people shine brighter and level up. Whether I am on stage, doing a live broadcast or coaching my Masterminds, I am always looking at how I can light up someone’s life, transform a corporate culture and provide life changing shifts.

What hurdles have you overcome being a woman in business?

I never think about being a woman in business. I remember a time when Lead Up for Women

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I was both anchoring the news and managing a team on CNN HLN. I realized I was the only woman at the Christmas party who was not a secretary. It made me realize that it was critically important we are not competing with other women and that it is essential we support each other. I have coached hundreds of women on negotiating their value for higher pay, more benefits and to never ever accept the first offer given in a deal.

My mother was always an executive, and her support and advice gave me so much confidence that my peers often lacked. She told me as a child that most mean acts from girls or women are rooted in jealousy and to never take it personal. She and my beloved father were my go to advisors when I was hired as a young president and chief executive officer in my 30s.

Meredith hosting The Meredith Show on NBC

No matter how tough the problem, my greatest lessons were to take time before responding in difficult situations.

In the south I learned “when you mess up, you better fess up.” Owning our mistakes is so critical in leadership.

What do you do to give back?

I speak and volunteer for The Make A Wish Foundation, foster children who are near to aging out of the system, and Domestic Violence events.

What do you see as some of your biggest opportunities moving ahead?

I have recognized that people really love my live trainings online and connecting with me in person, too. This year, I will be offering my clients and audience a series of two-day events both in my hometown Los Angeles and overseas. I am dedicated to teaching

Meredith with Actor, Rainn Wilson, from The Office

Meredith presenting her keynote “The M Factor”

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storytelling, magnetic marketing and deep connection. I have really built a beautiful tribe of loyal clients and trusted colleagues. This year, with the help of my friends and colleagues, I am creating a leadership program for teenagers. I have launched it with LA Foster kids and the feedback was remarkable and life changing.

The world needs more mentoring, generosity, kindness and love. I find that everything stems back to leadership in our lives, and I am driven to empower as many people I can with more clarity, connections and courage.

What is your method to stay connected with other women in business?

I recently created a meetup in Los Angeles to connect with local women in business because I could not find a local organization with women who share my values and ambitions.

My two-day events and a live series on Facebook, called “Mornings with Meredith,” attract sensational powerful and generous women. I have committed to do more of what I love and less of what I do not this year.

Connecting with and serving more heart-centered women is at the top of my list.

What mentors, sponsors, coaches have played an important role in your success?

I actually cannot remember a time when I didn’t have a mentor. I think we attract what we put out into the world. I have been showcasing amazing people and organizations on TV since I was in high school, and learned very quickly that people want to help you. It starts with asking.

My mom and dad were my greatest influencers. They owned several restaurants and even a comedy company through the years. They raised me to take risks, make moves and dream big.

My newest passion is learning, and then teaching clients and my audiences how to master leadership.

January-February 2020

I believe we are never done learning and growing. I always invest in coaching and have found it always pays back bigger than the dollars we put in. Now I am hired all over the world to speak, inspire and motivate current and future leaders. I am literally living my dream and it feels amazes to help fulfill others with that same invaluable gift.

How do you stay current with today’s trends?

I am continuously taking courses, speaking at and attending conferences and connecting with my colleagues. It may surprise you to know that I choose not to watch the

Meredith speaking at the Las Vegas Women’s Leadership Conference.

What’s the biggest item on your to-do list right now?

Finalizing my book. I am also very excited to reveal my new speaker reel and anticipate doubling the number of speaking gigs I booked last year.

What’s the most rewarding part of your career?

Watching my clients achieve major new breakthroughs, revenue streams, and elevate their status and authority and get on TV, podcasts and radio.

Meredith and her rescue dog Biscuit, enjoy lunch in Marina Del Rey, CA.

news anymore. I was on TV, anchoring, reporting and producing for ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX, CNN HLN for more than a decade and grew tired of the depressing reports and newscasts.

Now I am very selective about what I fill my mind with. I prefer listening to TED Talks, and other motivational speakers in my free time.

What is your growth plan?

My audience online and client growth this past year has been extraordinary. I am looking at how to handle the growth and onboarding the right team to support my tribe and events.

This year, I am committed to surrender more and follow my bliss. I think burnout only happens when we try to do everything on our own. I have been there and am not going back. leadupforwomen.com

Describe a typical day.

I rise at 5:30 a.m. to make coffee, meditate, fill a page in my gratitude journal, feed and walk my beloved rescue dog biscuit, speak for 30 minutes with my accountability partner.

We pray together. Next, I plan my entire day by the hour. At 7:45 a.m., I kick off the day with my live Facebook Series, “Mornings with Meredith,” where my audience looks forward to inspiration and motivation from me.

Midday, I take a long walk with my furry best friend and leave my cell phone behind to enjoy the nature.

I always stop and literally smell the roses. Thanks to the power of technology, I coach clients from all over the world during the day. I commit to very few evening activities. I always go to an evening yoga class and do a short 10-minute meditation before bed and recheck my calendar to see if I accomplished my top three objectives.

When I stick to that routine, I have so much peace and feel lighter and brighter. When I start missing parts of my routine, I am truly not at my best. When I travel to speak, I bring my mediation bowls and incense. I decline the social gatherings when on the road, more than I used to. It helps conserve my energy. My new mantra is if it does not contribute to my health, wealth, or inner peace, I say no. It really feels good too.

What is your secret to success?

I never ever stop learning, growing, transforming and giving back. I have learned to say no more, and also recently I have learned to ask for help more. I am more thoughtful about eating well, and how and who I spend my time with. I am very committed to my Kabbalah practice, and spend every Friday night with my friends and family for Shabbat dinner. Recently, I have also been going to Saturday worship services. It brings so much joy to me and balance when end my work week sundown on Friday nights.

When things seem scary, my faith has carried me through. I completely believe the basic principles of Kabbalah are critical success factors: being kind, committing to sharing one’s light, being proactive versus reactive and daily meditation. These basic principles have attracted tremendous abundance and beautiful people into my life.

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One-on-One with...

Meredith Allan

Tell us about your family?

My mother and father have literally been my best friends on earth. They have been the first I call for good news and bad. They had insane work ethic, and while I grew up a day care baby I never thought anything of it. In fact, later in life, when I learned my friends’ moms stayed at home I was totally confused about what they did all day.

My younger sister, Brandie, and her husband, John, own an international executive protection company. Their recent wedding was the most special occasion in our family’s history. The best part was having family fly in from all over the world and seeing my father Allan’s joy as he walked my sister down the aisle. I am also thrilled now to have a brother because it was an unfulfilled wish of mine, for many years. The most difficult thing our small family has endured is my father’s passing. Just a few months after the wedding, my dad fell ill with pancreatic cancer.

It was fast and heart-wrenching to see my strong dad die so quickly. Losing him has shifted my entire perspective of life. I do whatever it takes to manage the grief. Sometimes I take his shoes with me to the beach and smile and know he is still alive in my heart and I take his love with me everywhere I go. I dedicate all my work to my both my parents. I also use my dad’s name Allan as my last name to keep him with me always (and keep the crazies from finding me when on TV). In Judaism we say “May his memory be a blessing” and I like to add that my father’s legacy will always be my light.

How do you prioritize your health, family, and career?

Without your health there is no wealth. It is a constant struggle and I rely on my support system to help hold me accountable for healthy eating and habits. My parents really taught my sisters and I “next level love” so this year I am on a mission to be as loving as possible. I am searching for “the one” to grow old with and am accepting all referrals and recommendations. I am excited to slow down and build a family, and cherish my time with

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Lead Up for Women

Meredith at The World’s Greatest Motivators TV Show

family and friends. My best friend Rocio reminds me that career success is not the top priority, having a family to share everything with is what matters and I am recovering from years of being a workaholic.

I also believe perfection and balance isn’t the goal but working toward inner peace and living a meaningful impactful life can create happiness. I am the designer of my life, and I get to switch gears when things get off track but I never ever lose sight of my mission “Being Light”

What motivates you every day?

I have such a highly motivated personality and I think it was the unbelievable love my parents have consistently shown me that keeps me going. Like many families, we had a lot of difficult times and watching my mom and dad recover over and over again was amazing. My mom and dad literally told me I could be president of the world if I wanted to. And I wound up being president of my class and a large organization in my 30s, and now the CEO of my company Drive Marketing LLC. My little sister was an undercover narcotics detective in the NYPD before launching her international company and my oldest sister, Marlo, lives in Africa with her husband, Aron, and my nephew, Max, working as the head social worker at an international school. I also have a “little sister” who I adopted for life through The Big Brother and Big Sisters of America Program during college.

Her name is Julia, and I consider her my forever sister 25 years later. I am so proud of her because is an immigration attorney and proud mother living in New York City.

January-February 2020

How do you tap into the power of you that makes you unique?

I can be super nerdy and silly and I have learned to embrace it. I love reading books, and watching TED Talks, and interviewing my guests and helping them figure out their unique messaging and share their powerful unique stories. My superpower is apparently lighting up a room, broadcast, or someone’s life.

And how has that pushed you forward?

I recognize that the world needs my gifts more than ever. No one ever wakes up and says I think I will focus on being mediocre, and unmotivated. People never say something is too inspirational. Lifting others is a privilege and has proven to be the most rewarding work of my life time and time again.

Who inspires you?

My 3 friends currently battling breast cancer and my mom who is living on her own for the first time in 47 years. At 69, she even works full time too! In fact everyone who steps up and decides to start living their dream inspires me.

What’s the best thing a consumer/client ever said to you?

“Thank you for taking a stand for me and your love.” I often receive kind words about how inspiring my speeches are too. I recently had 2 viewers contact me because I was not live like usual with my ”Mornings with Meredith” inspirational broadcast at 7:45 am sharp and they were worried about me. It really touches me that they are so loyal and especially when they hit the share button on the video and post online about how inspired they are by my words.

What are your strongest traits as a leader?

Over the years this has changed. I do alot of personal and professional development work, and I now see it is not good enough to speak about leadership as I am often paid to do. It is more important to live the distinctions of leadership. I value being authentic, in integrity, my commitment to excellence, my faith, kindness, generosity, endurance, and courage. I hold a vision where I am able to inspire and motivate others to understand how you serve the world can change the world for the better. I just happen to serve through speaking, broadcasting, and mentoring.

What traits of other leaders inspire you?

The most magical inspiring traits of great leaders are radical honesty, willingness to press through adversity even when it is not clear how, and willingness to stand for what

leadupforwomen.com

they believe in. I am so inspired by the story of Ghandi, because he held a vision for a free unified India and never ever gave up. He never ever supported violence, and never accepted the excuses for acts of prejudice or injustice.

If more people would take a stand for what they believe in and for others this world would be a totally transformed place. As a Jewish woman I have experienced hatred, and prejudice over the years and am always shocked that communities and individuals tolerate that behavior. Kindness and generosity are what great leaders practice.

How are you mentoring/sponsoring others?

I am completely devoted to mentoring high school students on overcoming adversity, and I lead ongoing masterclasses online teaching leadership. Recently I have become focused on giving talks on how you can overcome anything to foster kids. My dream is to grow the program to reach foster kids across the United States.

What was the best advice you ever received?

Life is now. Also in the wise words of my mother, “You need to be in it to win it.” Which motivates me to take committed action. I have found that the magic doesn’t happen when you are sitting on the sidelines. I’m all in!

What does “Lead Up” mean to you?

It means we are all here to lift each other up. I pride myself in leading with generosity. This has changed over the years for me. It does not mean to over extend yourself, but give as often as you can, as long as you can. I used to shrink back when receiving compliments, later in life I began to acknowledge my greatest gift is to lead. When receiving kind words, I now say, ”thank you I know.” Too often we play down our greatness, our accomplishments, and to me it shows a lack of confidence in your purpose.

While I feel strongly that your ego is not your amigo, I do acknowledge myself for being a loving, courageous, powerful leader. I no longer shy away from difficult conversations, and I am first in line to take a stand for someone who is struggling and see them and hold them to their highest. Leadership and “leading up” is about who you get to be. Being kind, being generous, and committed to being in excellence and always being your word can impact millions. I am on a mission to impact millions, and the ability to lift, lead, inspire and motivate is a privilege.

As long as I live, my plan is to keep learning, growing, and transforming. Being the one to light up a room, stage, or broadcast is an absolute honor. The world needs more light. Lead Up and light the world up, shine on my sisters.

You were born to shine.

Lead Up for Women

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LEADERSHIP

What are you waiting for?

By Kelly Surette

that day, I pressed play on an episode of “The Chalene Show”—a podcast created by fitness superstar and business mogul Chalene Johnson. I could not tell you what the podcast was about, nor why I gravitated to it on that particular day, but one thing Chalene said (in her usual galvanizing style) stuck with me. It was, “What are you waiting for?”

What are you waiting for?

I was carrying a load of laundry when I happened to catch a glance of myself in the mirror. I could not believe what I saw. My younger daughter was just three months old and my oldest was two and a half years. The woman staring back at me had black, and I mean black bags under her eyes, from sleep deprivation, breast milk dripping down her T-shirt, and gray hairs sticking up from the roots of the dye job she had had six, no, maybe eight months earlier?

Her my face had somehow altered—beaten down by the rigors of two pregnancies, childbirth, a past of trauma and pain, and from caring for two children under the age of three.

I know many of you at this point might be shunning me in the name of the “beauty of motherhood,” but listen, I promise you this look was not pretty. I am sure I could have embraced my oversized breasts and tire-like tummy while dancing in the woods celebrating my newfound motherly glamour—and if that is your thing—go for it, girl. You are a warrior.

But it just was not me.

The me I wanted to be was the woman I knew I could be for myself and my daughters. So, for some reason 14 Lead Up for Women

The time I spent gloriously creating, editing and laboring over my book emancipated me in the rest of my life.

Now, I had been playing relatively small by my standards in the field of adaptive music instruction. And by “field,” I mean the unusually niche “Wild, Wild West” landscape of teaching music to students with disabilities. In other words, it was not exactly a field or career path—yet.

But, I had a decade of experience building and creating unique music education curriculum specifically designed to meet the needs of this population while teaching music to every variety of disability. Those included deaf and hard of hearing learners, students with Down Syndrome, Autism, William’s syndrome, and a multitude of other cognitive, intellectual and physical disabilities.

Music is a vehicle that transforms learners with disabilities on the deepest level. This was clear to me. I had witnessed its power first hand. I watched in awe as one of my profoundly deaf students felt music for the first time through a tactile audio device that used her skin as a hearing membrane instead of the cochlea in her ear. I cried along with support staff as a student with autism verbalized for the first time ever—singing the word “gorilla.” I danced the waltz with learners using wheelchairs—their elegant 360s rivaling that of ballerina’s at the Paris opera.

I knew both the importance of music as a means to elevate learners with disabilities to their highest level of self and the way in which the majority of January-February 2020

LEADERSHIP

school systems, institutions and administrators were off the mark in serving this population through music.

Students with disabilities are missing a critical component of a well-rounded liberal arts education. The falls between public music education programs inadvertently missing the boat by thrusting exceptional students such as these in general education music classes where they are under stimulated or overstimulated, music therapy replacing music education, and some students not receiving access to a music experience whatsoever.

Suddenly, additional words I was not ready for landed me like a ton of bricks. “Write. That. Book,” spoke the quiet, yet persistent voice of, well, something. The universe? God? My own heart?

Whatever it was, it sure was commanding. “Um, universe?” I said, “No offense, but look at me. I am a mess.

I cannot even find the time to make a cup of coffee, let alone write a book.

You are out of your mind. My children are so little. Aren’t they supposed to be my sole focus and predominant source of joy right now? There is just no room for any other sources of joy in my world at this time.”

“Write. That. Book. What are you waiting for?”

Ok, listen. After questioning my sanity for about 10 minutes I resolved

I did not get to go to the beach that summer and Daniel Tiger was on more than I would have liked in my house.

“Having it all” was more like having dishes to do with a sick baby on my hip while dictating a sentence into the recorder on my phone while laying out my clothes for work the next day.

Ugh, and the fear and guilt. The blazing, nauseating, terrifying fear and guilt that wretchedly engrossed my body and mind over not giving my children my full attention and possibly missing some monumental first step or adorable giggle burp because I was looking at my computer screen. Facing the merciless emotions of fear and guilt were the one part of the process of stepping into who I wanted to be as exceptional mother/author/leader I just could not do alone.

So often we as women we do not go after the things that bring us the greatest happiness because we are waiting for something to free us from the definitions of our purported role.

I was sitting on all this knowledge, passion and experience. I was literally hiding away, excusing myself from the life I was meant to live because I was a “tired mother,” a “good wife,” and the pain from my past had beaten me up so bad I figured I “could not possibly find the energy to put myself out there again.”

But something pushed me to look in the mirror a second time that morning. “What are you waiting for?”

Chalene repeated, a little more fervently this time from my muddied cell phone speaker.

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to write a book? I guess? After several direct messages from the cosmos, you just stop arguing. Despite my initial hesitation and mental back and forth, I got to work. I was afraid, but I did it anyway. My “Friends” binge-watching sessions on Netflix during naptime were cut short, but I got to work.

I mean, what was I waiting for anyway?

Hustle and drive. In between nap times, on the weekends, after the kids went to bed, at 5 a.m., I took every piece of myself I had left at the end of the day and channeled it into that book. I wrote and wrote, pouring my heart out in every sentence, every letter, every punctuation mark.

It was not without sacrifice; however, I do not want to give you that impression.

Enter Dr. Lori—the life coach who saved my life by leading me to the conclusion that all of my sources of joy matter. My goals matter. My dreams matter. We dealt with that fear and guilt head on in our gratifying Friday afternoon Skype sessions—weekly reminders that I was, in fact, born to raise two women who would go after their dreams because they saw their Mommy take action on hers.

Because I asked for Dr. Lori’s help, asked my mother-in-law to babysit a few extra days, asked for extra support from my parents, and asked my husband to skip a few Patriot’s games so he could watch the girls while I worked, I finished that book.

And the weird thing? The bags under my eyes actually got a little less January-February 2020

black and my eyes started to glow again. I somehow managed to get myself to the hair salon and even squeeze in a “Beachbody” On Demand workout or two during the week. When I was with my children, I was present, totally and unequivocally engrossed in playing with the Elsa castle or reading "Guess How Much I Love You?" while cuddling my two little snuggle bugs by the fireplace.

The time I spent gloriously creating, editing and laboring over my book emancipated me in the rest of my life. I now had complete autonomy over that woman in the mirror. Life was not just happening to me. Now, I was in the driver’s seat—my creative and personal needs on an equal playing field with those I cared for around me. I made the choice to have my children—and

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I am beyond grateful I did—but I also made the choice to write my book. And both of these choices were okay and could exist side by side in the same, beautiful world.

So often we as women we do not go after the things that bring us the greatest happiness because we are waiting for something to free us from the definitions of our purported role and the deep diversion we choose to take away from our own soul’s calling in the name of it.

If you are a mom that derives your satisfaction from absolute, undivided devotion to your children, that is wonderful and you are to be commended for your choices and your heart’s calling. We all need to stay in harmonious alignment with exactly who we are and what ignites our spirit.

But if you are like I was—waiting to go after your dreams because according to societal expectations as a woman you are “supposed” to be and want only one thing and you have allowed this societal expectation to become the compass for your life—or you are using motherhood as one of many excuses for not living your potential—or the woman in the mirror looking back at you is half the version of who she wants to be because she is waiting for someone to give her permission to chase all of the unrealized dreams that set her soul on fire.

Then I would challenge you to ask yourself right here, right now. What are you waiting for?

We only get one life. What are you waiting for?

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17

LEADERSHIP

Finding Your Way

Helpful hints for your leadership career path

Working toward your career goals can sometimes be a daunting task. It can feel like you are in a forest of trees with multiple paths without the ability to see if it is a dead end. You try to choose wisely and follow the signs, but you still end up lost and frustrated.

Having a guide to show you the way or explain where each path may take you is valuable. You do not have to travel the road alone. There are others who have gone before you, and can share their experience and knowledge to help you. At the end of the day, the decision to walk right, left or straight ahead is yours to own.

Leaning on others to gain confidence in your decisions will enable you to move forward.

I have 15 years of experience moving from a frontline role into leadership in Corporate America. I would like to share some of my journey and what has helped me achieve success in my path.

A career path is not always up and forward, it may be a side-step to gain experience and exposure. There is a misconception that career paths are straight. Many describe it as “climbing the corporate ladder.” You do not have to make any decisions about where you are going when you are on a ladder—it is either up or down. Since lateral moves are not feasible on a ladder, this narrowly focused journey can cause you to miss what is to the right or left.

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I will never forget what Facebook executive Sheryl Sandberg said during a webcast I attended. Sandberg, author of the bestselling book “Lean In,” compared trying did her career path to a jungle gym, where sometimes you may reach the bar above you to go up, and sometimes you move left to right.

It is unpredictable, exciting and unique to you since you get to decide where to go next. There is nothing wrong with a lateral move. It may open an upward climb that you could not see from your previous vantage point.

Sandberg’s simple concept had a significant impact on me personally.

I was always looking straight up and did not see value in a lateral move. I became frustrated when upward mobility was not happening or opportunities did not exist. It was not until I started to look laterally that I identified valuable next steps in my career.

While it was scary since it was not as clear where I would go next, it enabled me to learn new skills and work with different people. This experience was pivotal in the most significant career shift I encountered from leadership in the business to leadership in IT.

By Kristen Main

Take calculated risks that challenge you and help you grow in your career If I am being honest, risk taking is not easy for me. I am naturally risk averse.

I have worked in the insurance industry for years—a market where this personality trait aligns very well.

Early in my career, I did not have the confidence or see the value in pursuing career opportunities that were not 100% aligned to my skill set. That all changed when my company went through a “Lean” transformation. It was uncomfortable being a manager at the time and feeling like a new hire. I had to learn new ways to do my work and how to use the system we were implementing. It was the most difficult and rewarding experience I have had in my career, changing the path I was on tremendously.

I realized I had strong problem-solving capabilities that I was not only able to use for what I was facing, but to help coach and train others, too. I recognized I was not as strong in the analytical aspect, so I went back to school to earn an MBA with a concentration in Six Sigma.

I did not need this degree for a specific role or career move; I needed it for my own growth and confidence. In fact, I will never forget a colleague’s response when I told him. “Well that is similar to an engineering degree,” he said with a surprised and skeptical tone in his voice.

At first, I had butterflies. His doubt nearly shook me. I ended up graduating January-February 2020

with a 4.0 and I am now in a higher-level position than he is. There will always be people around you who support you and believe in you, and those who doubt your decisions. Find your internal voice and confidence, and know that you can learn new things and achieve success when faced with a challenge.

Going after a sure thing will deliver some satisfaction when you are successful. But trying something out of your comfort zone will bring you the greatest feeling of satisfaction, especially when you conquer it and achieve success.

Building relationships is essential to your career I currently work remote. I am not in the same office as the team I work with.

Sometimes I go to a local office several times a week, even though technically I could work from home. I used to be a manager in the department, where I was able to see familiar faces daily.

It is critically important for me to stay connected to people in the company and maintain relationships. Not only does this help me down the road, it also brings an element to my job that I find motivating and inspiring.

Early in my career, I had a manager I worked closely with on a special project. When the project ended, I took a promotion and moved across the country into a new role. I occasionally tried to keep in touch with that manager by offering to help when he had a question that involved my department.

We both moved into different roles.

Six years later, he had an opening on his team I was very interested in. I ended up working for him for a couple of years. I believe that by helping him when it was not required kept my name relevant to him. It ended up positively impacting my chance at earning a spot on his team.

Over the years, I have also helped others around me find opportunities for a career move based on connections I have. I encourage you to find a company that has a culture of teamwork and collaboration where people help each other and value relationships. leadupforwomen.com

So how do you get into leadership?

Sometimes there is an opinion that only managers are leaders and that you must achieve a certain level within a hierarchy to be a leader. I believe leadership is needed at all levels within an organization and should be demonstrated regardless of your title or position.

You should try to motivate and inspire others. Remember: We are all in this together. Set an example of high performance and exceptional work ethic and try to help others work at that same level. Make yourself available to help others and ensure that you are someone they look up to and respect.

This attitude and effort will not go unnoticed and will bring job satisfaction beyond just achieving your own results.

Management positions can feel like thankless jobs, but you are trying to get work done through others by coaching and developing them.

to take the plunge. Family can be a great source of encouragement, but they can be bias. Having work friends in your corner is very important.

I made a life-changing decision to post for a position that resulted in my family moving across the country.

I remember sitting at my desk staring at the application, struggling to decide if I should post. My husband supported me 100%, but the doubt I felt was more about my ability to do the job successfully.

Suddenly, my phone rang. It was a manager I had worked with briefly in the company. I did not know what to expect when I answered. After she asked me about the posting, I shared my thoughts. She encouraged me to go for it. That two-minute phone call was all I needed to nudge me forward. That simple gesture had a significant impact on my career. We do not always know what someone

You should try to motivate and inspire others.

Remember: We are all in this together.

Sometimes, they will be successful and sometimes they will not. Try different things and find what works for each person. Be willing to identify when you might need to do something new. The best leaders are humble and willing to take advice from others and demonstrate agility in how they approach things.

Find your cheering section We talked about relationships, but this is different. Your cheering section looks out for and supports you through the good and bad. I have three women on my team who are my cheering section. They send me postings of jobs they think I would be excel at and encourage me to take risks when I am feeling self-doubt. I do the same for them.

We all have had situations where we need someone to give us a nudge

needs or what they are thinking, so we should reach out and encourage others and be their “cheerleaders.�

Over the years, I have achieved exceptional results, and received many awards and accolades. But what I am most proud of are the people I have been able to help move forward in their careers. I was recently brought to tears by a former employee who told a group that I was her hero. They looked at her strangely since I am not famous. She went on to tell them how I had helped her find success and that she would not be where she was without me. It was by far the best compliment I have ever received and I will cherish that forever.

Who have you helped recently?

kristenrmain77@gmail.com

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BUSINESS

All for one

Why WBDC is the resource today’s women entrepreneurs can count on The Women’s Business Development Center (WBDC) is a nationally recognized nonprofit leader in the field of women’s economic development.

Originally founded in 1986 to provide programs and services to support and accelerate women’s business ownership, WBDC has since grown to serve all underrepresented business owners.

The organization aims to drive business diversity and fuel innovation to increase the economic impact of startups, emerging and established business owners. WBDC and its dedicated team members empower entrepreneurs to succeed through business advising and coaching, certification and procurement opportunities, financial education and capital assistance.

The WBDC serves a nine-state Midwest region with headquarters in Chicago and offices in Minneapolis, Kansas City, St. Louis, and Milwaukee.

Within this region, WBDC is a partner for the Women’s Business Enterprise National Council (WBENC), the 20 Lead Up for Women

country’s largest third-party certifier of women-owned businesses. They are responsible for certifying Women Business Enterprises (WBEs), a powerful tool that has helped thousands of women entrepreneurs compete for contracts with the government and major corporations.

WBDC offers tailor-made programs to help business owners chart their path to success. These programs help business owners actualize their innovative potential to better serve their customers, increase their impact on their communities and achieve their business goals.

Large-scale innovation across industries and micro-level innovation

within companies is essential for business growth. Ignite: Women’s Innovation Network is a space for women-owned companies to partner with corporations and other business owners to innovate and improve supplier diversity ecosystems. Top Shelf: High Volume Retail Growth Insights Program helps retail business owners expand their market to national retailers. Plan for Profit helps business owners create a profitable business plan.

Since its inception, WBDC has served more than 85,000 women, held over 13,000 entrepreneurial training workshops, secured $82 million-plus in financing, and facilitated in excess of $1 billion in government and corporate contracts. WBDC also certifies approximately 1,900 Women Business Enterprises (WBEs) annually.

WBDC’s success is owed to a very dedicated team of business leaders, including women’s advocate and current president and CEO Emilia DiMenco. Her career began at BMO Harris N.A., where she spent 30 years in corporate banking before joining the WBDC. DiMenco rose through the ranks at BMO Harris, eventually being elevated to executive VP in the corporate and commercial bank. She also led BMO Harris’ Women in Business Initiative, which made the bank the choice for many women business owners.

During her time at BMO Harris, DiMenco also served on WBDC’s Board of Directors. She then refocused her career and joined the WBDC as COO to work under its original co-presidents, before transitioning to president and CEO in 2013.

January-February 2020

Since DiMenco’s arrival, WBDC has dramatically expanded its direct lending program, which now offers a pool of more than $3.3 million.

DiMenco is proud to advance the mission of WBDC as an advocate for women and other underrepresented business owners. But she credits her trusted team for WBDC’s ongoing innovation and success. The WBDC team consists of a group of experts who specialize in a variety of business categories and can advise business owners in any industry at any stage. The entire team embodies WBDC’s mission, and together are leveling the playing field for women and minority business owners.

Through the years, WBDC has a built a long list of success stories and entrepreneurs that have benefited from their services. One such client is Kimberly Meek, owner and CEO of Hacha Products Corporation. A certified Women and Minority Business Enterprise, Hacha is the only lab solely dedicated to testing and treating water for PFAS—pollutants that have been linked to cancer, high cholesterol and other medical condition.

With help from WBDC’s Ignite: Women’s Innovation Network, Meek and her team began partnerships with world-class research institutions and best-in-class industry leaders like Agilent Technologies to scale their technology. Hacha now has a dedicated private laboratory in Chicago where their team can prepare, test, and analyze samples collected by field technicians.

WBDC and its dedicated team members empower entrepreneurs to succeed through business advising and coaching, certification and procurement opportunities, financial education and capital assistance.

Through the innovative partnerships established by WBDC, Hacha is addressing this large-scale issue with reduced testing times while informing policy, infrastructure, and treatment planning for future protection of our water and our communities.

Another example is Jana Farmer of Ms Jana’s Candy, who turned her avocation into a full-fledged business in 2018 at age 67. What started as a hobby of making homemade treats

Emilia Dimenco

soon turned into a booming business.

WBDC was able to guide her through what came next. By connecting with WBDC, “Ms Jana” gathered tools to grow her business. In fact, she recently secured her first loan from CIBC bank, and was approved within two weeks with guidance from WBDC, helping her financially grow her business. She was also certified as a WBE in 2020.

Sue Tierno and her sister Kathleen Wood, co-owners and founders of Suzy’s Swirl, a frozen dessert company, are expanding their business thanks to the WBDC’s Top Shelf program. Following their success with frozen yogurt and sorbet, their next venture led them to the WBDC, where its team of experts guided them through the process of working with big name retailers to sell their new Suzy Swirl Spiked pints, an alcohol-infused frozen yogurt.

As a result, Tierno and her business partners are in the process of arranging deals with several national retailers to sell Suzy’s Swirl Spiked Pints on their shelves.

For years, WBDC has served as a resource for women and minority entrepreneurs and business owners like this.

As the business landscape continues to evolve, WBDC is committed to evolving its services to best support their partners and clients. The organization will adapt existing programs and fill any gaps in the business landscape necessary to help businesses flourish.

For more information or to connect with one of WBDC’s experts, visit www.wbdc.org.

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21

BUSINESS

Embracing your ‘enoughness’

By Cat LaCohie

5 ways burlesque can positively impact every area of your life you judging your performance abilities?

Your intelligence? Your achievements?

Is the voice of judgment in your head created by a parent, a co-worker, a sibling, a supposed friend? (Hint: Stop hanging out with these people wherever possible.)

I advise all my students to avoid the mentality of going on stage asking the audience, “Is this doing it for you? Is this sexy? Do you like what I’m doing?”

It is not about asking the audience if you are good enough and if you are meeting their standards., it is about saying, “Look at me, I am awesome.

Witness me in my height of glory.”

Once you give yourself permission to do this on stage, you will find yourself instinctively walking into all rooms with the same confident attitude.

If you are looking to improve your confidence and charisma—from the bedroom, to the boardroom and everywhere in between—look no further.

Burlesque is more than just flirtatious tease—it is an attitude of confidence that can positively impact every area of life. Here are five ways to show you the way:

1. Enhancing your "enoughness" Working on your “enoughness” in the world of burlesque trains this muscle for your everyday life. There are several things my new Burlesque students worry about when they first come to me, but usually it boils down to two main points: 1. Body image 2. Self-doubt in their ability What I love about creating solo acts with my students is that “it’s all about pleasing you.” I am not teaching group choreography where everyone compares themselves to everyone else.

We create a solo act to celebrate you in whichever way you see fit.

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› What do you want to express? › What fires you up? › You make the rules to suit your needs and your strengths.

Burlesque is about embracing your uniqueness, in life and onstage. For anyone who experiences self-doubt throughout the day—“I don’t belong here,” “I’m not good enough”—I would advise them to follow up that question with, “by whose standards?”

By whose standards are you feeling that your body has flaws? Who says you should not proudly show off these areas of your body just because they have not been air brushed by photoshop? By whose standards are

2. Remove any stigma about flaunting your sexuality People feel guilty for wanting to look and feel sexy, especially in the world of business, which can be so masculine orientated. Too often, we shy away from embracing our feminine power and sexuality in order to be “taken seriously” (FTS!).

Newcomers to burlesque may worry about what everyone else thinks of them. “Are my parents going to think less of me?” “What if my co-workers find out?” Again, these doubts are related to other people’s standards.

Remember, when people judge us or prevent us from doing something, it is because it causes fear in them. Your action highlights their inaction, their inability to do the very thing you have the confidence to do.

Burlesque is too often misinterpreted by those who have never experienced it. It is not solely about stripping January-February 2020

and revealing flesh, in the voyeuristic sense. Your act is about a peeling and revealing of layers and concepts.

Rather than saying, "I’m naked and vulnerable,” you are actually rebelliously and joyously saying, ‘“I’m ripping off this mask that society has made me wear.”

You are not doing this for anyone else. You are not taking your clothes off to titillate "some guy." You are celebrating yourself, peeling back the layers you are wearing in order to celebrate the beautiful human underneath.

3. Find your political voice Yes, you can use your burlesque stage as a public soapbox. If you feel you cannot voice your opinion at the dinner table or water cooler, whether that is because other people shun your opinion or you do not articulate enough to join the conversation, try Burlesque.

Be political. You are making art.

And for what other reason do people create art than to say something to the world? That is the essence of Burlesque. It is therapeutic and cathartic for the performer, and the audience gets something out of it, too.

4. Re-invent yourself (it is never too late) You never have to settle for the “you” that you are now. Just because you grew up a certain way, with specific experiences, does not mean you must keep that identity for the rest of your life.

If you are stuck with something you do not like, change it. Large or small, you can move, quit your job, break up with somebody, or just color your hair. Some changes may take longer than others, but it is better to slowly crawl in the direction you want, than to sprint the other way.

With this in mind, a huge life change and self-reinvention may seem overly daunting, so start with the Burlesque stage. Allow this to be your arena for a new persona.

Embrace your brazen alter-ego. Give it a name. Let it take the blame for your newfound style and behavioral choices.

Allow it the freedom to not “fit in” or leadupforwomen.com

meet somebody else’s expectations of you. You can gradually allow your new persona to filter into your everyday life and realize that the people who matter will fall in love with the quirkiness and weirdness that truly is you.

5. Draw attention to your “flaws” and make them your USP (unique selling point) Rather than hide the areas you have been made to feel bad about in your everyday life, your burlesque act is the perfect opportunity to draw attention to (and celebrate) those qualities. Maybe these qualities are not accepted or celebrated in the work environment or around your family, but those rules and regulations do not exist when your burlesque persona hits the stage.

In the burlesque world, these qualities are no longer tainted as negative flaws, they are just a quality that makes you different from the person standing next to you. These qualities are what make you uniquely you—and you can start to embrace them as your USP.

As you gradually get used to confidently flaunting those areas, you will see it filter into your everyday life.

The more confidence you have in every element that is you, the more you can start to surround yourself with those who value you for the person you truly are, rather than feeling the need to change for others.

For anyone craving more tips on self-confidence and celebrating yourself, both on and off the stage, check out my intro to burlesque class, “Unleash Your Inner Vixen,” with me in Los Angeles. For more information, visit www.vixendeville. com/classes/introductory-workshop/. If you are outside the LA area, you can sign up for a free consultation with me online at www.vixendeville.com/ consultation-questionnaire.

Cat will be exhibiting at The Best You Expo at the LA Convention Centre, March 20-21. Check out her seminar, “Revealing The True You — No Apology Needed!” in the Empowering Women room, March 21, 11:30 a.m., and join her in the Inspiration Zone, March 21, 2:30 p.m., for the interactive session, “Walking on Broken Glass… and Other SelfDiscoveries.” For more information, visit https://thebestyouexpo.com/us/ speaker/cat-lacohie/

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23

LIFESTYLE

The Secret to a Passionate, Purposeful Life Just as the subtle morning sun casts its first rays into the canyon, I hit “send” on the final edits to my book editor. My living room is wall-less, and from the three acres of untamed jungle land I steward with my life-partner, Manex, comes a cacophony of squawking, squeaking, chirping, clicking and howling.

This is the place I chose as sanctuary for healing and self-realization, and now seekers on the precipice personal change, comes to the Nicoya Peninsula, our little piece of paradise on Costa Rica’s pacific coast. It is no coincidence that the walls between me and the natural world have dissolved, just like the barrier between my dreams and reality.

From where I sit, it all feels orchestrated by some divine design, but of course it did not always feel like that.

A decade ago, everything I had spent years diligently achieving had been unapologetically desecrated like an unsuspecting Midwestern town at the hands of a violent twister.

Just shy of 30, I had attained a successful life that looked really good on paper. I was continually ranking No. 1 nationally at a top Fortune 100 company and living in a beachfront penthouse with my internet tycoon boyfriend, jetting off to extravagant vacations. The only problem was, when I got really real with myself, which was not too frequently back then, I knew that something big was missing. I just had no idea what it was or how to go about finding it.

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Adrenaline-pumping activities served as brief refuge from this pervasive apathy, and shiny things momentarily brought me to life. High falutin’ parties and friendship drama were temporary distractions from a deep-seated sadness churning inside of me. In my limited scope of consciousness, I blamed the man I was with. Obviously, he was not doing enough for me—for us.

What I had yet to discover was that the spirit is always working on our behalf, guiding us into situations so we can wake up to our truth and power.

And spirit guided me into the most devastating creation of my life, where I was stripped of everything I valued.

It was then, when the boy broke my heart, I lost my luxe lifestyle, and my friends cut their ties with me, that my quest

By Emily Pereira

inward began. Much to my surprise, what felt like the most painful breakdown of my life, gave way to the most pivotal breakthrough I could ever imagine.

It was then that the forces of the universe converged to connect me with powerful spiritual teachers, and I saw the greatest source of my pain was not from losing this man or this so-called perfect life; it was from unconsciously following a script I did not write.

I had soaked up messages from the fabric of what was around me, and internalized these messages as my own. My narrow script left little room for creative risks, because taking chances might expose me as not being the image of perfection I had gotten used to portraying. This script urged me to find the most successful alpha-male in the room, and bask in his glow, so I would feel worthy and safe. Now mind you, I had no idea I was doing any of this. The most devious thing about my script was that it had me believing it did not exist at all.

The first rule of the script is that there is no script.

After my breakthrough, I pulled back the layers of illusion I had carefully constructed around me and got real with myself. I recognized that I had created a life based on external validation and in doing so, became an unwell, uninspired and unhappy woman. I wanted to be a woman who strode confidently in the direction of her dreams, but I could not identify anything I had a burning passion to do.

When a teacher urged me to explore my creative side, I was like, “Um, what creative side?”

January-February 2020

For 32 years, I had always assumed creativity was a genetic thing and that gene had unceremoniously passed me by. I soon learned that “blah” feeling I could not shake was merely fear of failure masquerading as apathy. My script had me believing that unless I was going to be perfect and do it perfectly, I may as well not even try.

As I gained greater consciousness, I discovered that I did not have to be perfect to participate creatively, I just needed to be the beginner. In the book, “Zen Mind,” Shunryu Suzuki says, “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities. In the experts mind, there are few.”

The beginner is Teflon armor against fear of failure because The Beginner is not supposed to know a damn thing. With this utterly simple, yet revolutionary insight, I gave myself permission to be the beginner and began to write. After literally writing nothing in 11 years but emails and, oh, I don’t know, the occasional thank you note, I was amazed that by suspending judgment. My creations flowed freely, and a most unusual thing occurred: I began to reveal myself authentically and vulnerably in a way I never had before, which restored a sense of integrity I had lost somewhere along my path.

Then, it was as if a wildfire caught a tail wind and suddenly creative passion was tearing through every facet of my being. A 600-page book poured out of me (being published later this year). I began playing guitar, singing and writing songs. I started painting big canvases full of bright colors. I built an art studio in my home. I began taking improv classes and dancing burlesque. The overwhelming desire to create generated such a monumental shift inside of me, triggering a cascade of spiritual changes. I had no idea the creative and the spiritual were so intricately woven together, propelling one another forward like happy bedfellows.

For the first time in my life, I was genuinely awake, alive and inspired.

The resentment I had been harboring toward my ex-boyfriend finally leadupforwomen.com

evaporated like stubborn condensation on the bathroom mirror. I realized it was not he who had abandoned me; I had abandoned myself and my dreams a time long ago in a bid to gain approval and acceptance.

Like a seesaw, as my belief in myself went up, I watched my competition with others go down. I developed a genuine camaraderie with other women who were courageously following their dreams, and a sincere compassion for those still trapped in their own private prisons of perfection. It was then when I knew that my life’s work would center around helping women access the source of their feminine power.

The way to an adventurous, passionate, fulfilling existence is the exact opposite of what most of us have been programmed to believe. Life’s gifts do not come from being perfect and doing everything perfectly; they show up when we simply give ourselves permission. Permission is the golden key that unlocks a treasure trove of astounding passion. And passion is no accident. It is the compass directing you to your purpose.

In my personal experience, and in the experience of the women with whom I am honored to work, I have witnessed a universal truth. When we are lit up by our own lives, and inspired by our own creations, living on purpose, competition and comparison fall away and genuine sisterhood becomes possible. Women truly supporting one

another—all on the same side—is the beginning of a whole new earth.

My professional path unfolded organically. I began intensive coaching, facilitating online writing programs, speaking and hosting workshops internationally. I combined my passions—writing, surfing, yoga, clean eating, spirituality and empowering other women—and created a one-ofa-kind wellness retreat, where women can do all of this together. We call it “The Mermaid Sisterhood Retreat,” and I love watching how this carefully curated experience returns women to their innate, alluring, radiant light.

Watching the monkeys swing from the Guanacaste tree through my wallless living room, as my second child grows in my womb, not a day goes by that I do not marvel at the silent intelligence of spirit, constantly working on our behalf. Life does not happen to us, it is happening for us. The secret is not to let the hardships break you down, but instead, let them break you open. It is then that you will find yourself facing an exciting new horizon again and again, even more astonishing than the last.

Best contact info: Website: emilypereira.com Email: hello@emilypereira.com Instagram: @emilybegins

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25

PHILANTHROPY

A Pivotal Space Do good. Be better. Lead best.

Women have always been givers. Look at Marie Curie. Her findings led to effective cures for cancer. Then there is Harriet Tubman, who freed not only herself from slavery, but also rescued 70 others. Think of Mother Teresa and her distinguished charitable work that stretches across the world.

Women’s humanitarian efforts are well documented in books (Ruth Bader Ginsburg for gender equality), highlighted in movies (Norma Rae for organizing a union), and splashed throughout the media in today’s world (too many to mention here).

But what about just looking in the mirror and at those around you? We are nieces, daughters, wives, moms and grandmas who are working toward a common goal: to make the world a better place filled with peace, compassion and goodness. Deep down, we are selfless creatures hungry 26 Lead Up for Women

to support our loved ones and help people we have never even met.

As women leaders, our role as givers should be a no brainer. We must encourage philanthropy for ourselves and our peers. We should demand charity in conjunction with commerce. It is up to us to make these things happen.

Women play a major role in the workplace, and we have the capacity to give back to our communities. If you have not had the time to give in the past—whether monetarily or through volunteerism—then now is the time to do so.

By Rochelle Brandvein

And, starting today, Lead Up for Women is going to join you in this very concerted effort.

Lead Up and Give Back It is safe to say women have big hearts and with that comes even bigger responsibility. Lead Up for Women’s current creed encompasses three pillars: Leadership (shares women’s inspiring stories); Business (highlights business powerhouses in various industries); and Lifestyle (focuses on finding the proper work/ play balance).

Lead Up is now adding a fourth pillar dedicated solely to Nonprofits. This new section is a gift to every woman who has ever wanted to make a difference. With this pillar we will: January-February 2020

› Highlight the efforts of the women who have turned their pain into something positive; › Make you stop, take notice and step up for what is right. › Walk the path of self-actualization by reaching your full potential when it comes to spreading the good that we all have inside of us.

Our newly dubbed “A Pivotal Space” section will make you ask yourself, “Am I doing enough?” If you are not, it is time to pivot toward the contribution process.

According to Charity Navigator, an estimated $410.02 billion was given to charitable causes in 2017. Individuals accounted for 70% ($286.65 billion) of the giving, representing a 3% increase over 2016. The primary charity recipients were religious groups, education, human services and health charities.

The best part of the data is that donating individuals—not big foundations or corporations—are responsible for the vast majority of annual donations. You do not have to go broke to make a difference. You just need to do so in your own way, which can be your time instead of your dollars.

Passionate women making a difference As altruistic beings, we appreciate others who are changing the world. Look at 16-year-old climate activist Greta Thunberg, who was named Time magazine’s “Person of the Year” for 2019.

Her protests regarding climate change started with handmade signs and grew to a global climate strike in September that had four million participants. Thunberg, who has Asperger’s syndrome, is the publication’s youngest person to ever earn this designation.

Talk show host and media mogul Oprah Winfrey created “The Oprah Winfrey Scholars Program,” which are given to students who will use their education to give back to both the US and abroad. She also funds “The Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa,” which is for young women leadupforwomen.com

who have provided service in their communities to create change. Outstanding work from a woman who began her broadcasting career at age 17.

Melinda Gates and Microsoft chairman/husband Bill founded the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, which helps improve the lives and health of those in developing countries and in the US. This foundation is the world’s largest private charitable organization in existence.

(financial gurus for funding strategies and initial set up, non-profit lawyer, an advisory board and a knowledgeable support system) to guide you through the process.

Pick your cause — Select a specific industry that you are passionate about ranging from children and health to veterans and animals. Then find the right charity for you by doing plenty

Lead Up is now adding a fourth pillar dedicated solely to Nonprofits. This new section is a gift to every woman who has ever wanted to make a difference.

World Humanitarian Day recently celebrated many unsung heroes who have produced authentic results for the world, including volunteers in the Red Cross or Red Crescent. These women—who make up more than half of the membership around the world—are among the first to respond in disasters, epidemics and conflicts. They include the late Asma Jehangir—a human rights activist who founded the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan)—and Alina Azhar, the first Pakistani woman to receive “The Diana Award” for her humanitarian efforts.

Just keep swimming “Finding Nemo” was an iconic movie chock full of wisdom. The forgetful yet motivational Dory used the mantra “Just Keep Swimming” to stay calm, get a grip and power on. Her persistence, which was key to helping find Nemo, should be an inspiration to all of us when tackling the non-profit component in your life.

Here how you can unite your efforts and help those who need it most: Start your own nonprofit — Define your mission via a strong business plan before you take the leap. Surround yourself with a team of experts

of research (check out websites and reviews, as well as seek input from those who currently are associated with organizations you are interested in.)

Dream big — Once you narrow down your selection, it is up to you to select how you visualize your pivot. Your generosity—ranging from financial support or weekend volunteering to lending your expertise as a board member— will be greatly appreciated.

Share Your Story A Pivotal Space is a place to share your wins, your hopes and your talents.

Help us inspire others to make your best choices and live healthier lives. So get ready as we embrace an exploration of epic proportions together. Let’s do this.

Rochelle Brandvein is the owner of Brandvein-Aaranson Public Relations, a 30-year-old PR agency that recently pivoted to solely handling nonprofits and companies with a philanthropic arm or foundation. Her company specializes in publicity, copywriting and creative services.

Lead Up for Women

27

PHILANTHROPY

The most important resolution you’ll ever make At the beginning of this year, many of us promised ourselves we would make improvements in our lives for 2020. It is no surprise that most are struggling to keep those New Year’s resolutions and will break and remake them many times hoping to get one to stick. According to the research group Ipsos, the top vows that Americans made this year were to get their finances in order, eat healthier and exercise more—all worthy pursuits. But studies of the happiest people on earth show that rich or poor, thin or not, there is something that matters more to our overall happiness.

If you could make a single resolution during 2020—and because of it, be happier from now on—would you make it? Turns out you can.

I was able to get motivated to be happier when I admitted to myself that I was not as happy as I could be.

I felt an emptiness and a longing for something. But what? I felt well-rooted spiritually, in my home life and in my career. But something was missing. A friend told me about a program that provides food to families in need and encouraged me to volunteer. I had doubts that volunteering would make me happier, but I had nothing to lose and jumped in.

To my surprise, collecting and distributing food to people with real needs was incredibly satisfying. The world’s problems are big, but knowing I could do something small to help a few people was inspiring and empowering.

After a few months of volunteering, I actually felt more at ease and happier in my life. This feeling made me want to do more. I decided I would do something every day for someone in need. I was also inspired 28

Lead Up for Women

to kick the commitment up a notch.

I had found a Mother Teresa quote that rang true. “In this life we cannot do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”

I felt as though I had been personally challenged. I set a goal to think differently. As I served, I would make a conscious effort to be more observant, more patient, more kind and to grow in love. I was curious to see where that would take me.

It turned out that making good on that two-part commitment had an almost magical effect. Day by day I felt more positive and energized. I also began to see and appreciate how fortunate I had been in my own life and, because of that, how much I had to give. I had never felt so grateful and content. This brand of volunteering— conscious, loving service to others—had replaced my longing with a deep sense of satisfaction.

As it turns out, science backs up the benefits of helping others. Studies

by United Healthcare,1 Carnegie Melon University2 and others have revealed that people who volunteer feel healthier.

They are less likely to develop high blood pressure, which often leads to a heart attack and stroke.

Even more dramatic is the connection between volunteering and emotional health and well-being.

People who volunteer report less stress, improved mood and self-esteem, closer friendships and a feeling of belonging. They report a powerful sense of purpose, which in studies of the happiest people on earth, turns out to be key to happiness and as a bonus, to a longer life.3 At first, it was tough to make time to volunteer regularly, and growing in virtues like patience and kindness is a life-long practice, at least in my case.

Change takes time and practice. But it is been worth the effort. If I will live longer remains to be seen, but on all other counts I can confirm the studies.

My stress declined, my mood lifted and the wonderful people I met volunteering became life-long friends.

Not only did that nagging longing vanish, but this new path created the most fulfilling life I could have imagined— the stuff that real happiness is made of. And little did I know it then, but with this first step, I was well on my way to finding an abiding purpose in my life.

Not too long after my first foray into volunteering providing food to families in need, I ended up volunteering in villages in the Guatemalan highlands.

It was in those remote villages that I found a joy like none I had experienced before. I also found my purpose.

January-February 2020

I founded a help organization that is still going strong today, nearly three decades later.

In 2013, I was fortunate to be able to become a full-time volunteer in Guatemala. Now I have the honor of working with a wonderful team of volunteers to provide quality health care and education for young people with great need who live in those villages, and I am grateful for every day I have to serve.

But fulfillment does not depend on making volunteering a career. With every new day, each of us have the opportunity to do small things with great love for family, friends, and with a little effort, for strangers. If you find joy in walking a dog at a nearby shelter, volunteering at a thrift store, staffing a help project in a far-flung h ttps://www.unitedhealthgroup.com/ newsroom/2017/0914studydoinggoodisgoodforyou.html 2 https://www.cmu.edu/news/stories/archives/2013/ june/june13_volunteeringhypertension.html 3 Shannon Freeman, John Garcia & Hannah R. Marston (2013) Centenarian Self-Perceptions of Factors Responsible for Attainment of Extended Health and Longevity, Educational Gerontology, 39:10, 717-728, DOI: 10.1080/03601277.2012.750981

Stay connected New Book Hope Dancing [www.amazon.com/dp/1732885605] Website [www.localhope.org] Donate [www.localhope.org/donation] Sponsor [https://xelaaid.org/sponsor/students-seeking-sponsors] Volunteer [https://xelaaid.org/volunteer] Facebook [www.facebook.com/xelaaid/] Instagram [www.instagram.com/xela.aid/] Twitter [https://twitter.com/xelaaid]

corner of the world as I do, or in some other form of loving service, the results will be life-changing for all involved.

If you are already volunteering, you know the benefits. Pass the idea on. If

not and you believe the studies and the stories like mine, a happier, more fulfilling life is just one resolution away— and it’s not too late to do it in 2020.

If not now, when?

1

Leslie Baer Dinkel has worked in critically underserved communities in Guatemala’s highlands for nearly three decades. She is the founder of the non-profit organization LocalHope.org. Her new book, “Hope Dancing: Finding Purpose and a Place to Serve among the Maya,” offers tremendous insight into poverty, the nature of self-determination and the transformational power of full-hearted giving.

Join us in leading Up through giving back

Donate: www.localhope.org/donation Volunteer: www.localhope.org/volunteer Sponsor a Child for School: www.localhope.org/sponsor/ students-seeking-sponsors

Did you know your gift of $30 can provide a night of safe housing for mother in need? Make your life-changing donation to Maggie’s Place www.maggiesplace.org.

SheLift is a 501(c)3 organization that empowers young women with physical differences to discover confidence and self esteem through outdoor recreation and mentorship.

Donations accepted: https://shelift.org/ Founded by Sarah Herron (previous Bachelorette contestant)

One Love was founded in honor of Yeardley Love, a 22-year-old college student who was killed by her ex-boyfriend. After her death, the family started the One Love Foundation to educate young people about the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. For more information, visit joinonelove.org

leadupforwomen.com

Lead Up for Women 29

Lead Up Tips

10

TO TIPS UR LIFE E YO SIER K A M EL EA FE

By Geordoni McKoy

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

How does the idea of slowing down feel?

6.

Minimize the heavy moments

7.

Ask for Help

When you ask for help, you create the opportunity to feel supported. Life is so much more fulfilling with a little help. Ask your added fulfillment will affect you and those around you.

30 Lead Up for Women

What did you like to do as a little girl? Did you enjoy roller-skating, dancing, singing and teddy bears? Are you someone who needs a birthday cake on your birthday. Hell yes to all of the above. Your permission is all you need.

9.

Are you really overwhelmed

As adults, we do not smile or laugh as much as we did when we were children.

What if you payed someone $15-$20 per hour for a total of 10-12 hours of work a month. How much lighter would that make you feel? There are talented people everywhere. It is up to you to put on your magician’s hat and go find them.

Stay in touch with your little girl

8.

Laugh every chance you get

Hire some help

Judgment, shame and blame of yourself and others is heavy. Instead, implement grace, compassion and surrender. They are much lighter and feel so much better.

What will other people think?

Like Nike: Just Do It

Perfection is not required—to wear that swim wear, to start dating, to launch that business, to love yourself, to go live on social media. Do it now and fine tune it later. You do not have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.

Instead of eating in the car on the run, stop somewhere for 20 minutes and eat. Instead of speeding to get somewhere, take a deep breath and look for three new objects you have never seen before. Joy and happiness is now; it is not the destination.

10.

I have one question: If other people’s opinions did not matter, what action would you take right now?

Are you overwhelmed or are your thoughts overwhelming? If your thoughts are overwhelming, take a couple breaths and look around. Are you safe? Ask yourself if it is something you can step away from for a moment. If so, give yourself a moment and come back later. If taking a break makes you feel anxious, take one action step forward and reassess.

Let it go

Is something bothering you today? Is it forcing you to hold on? You are the only person you answer to. When you surrender the desire for control, you free yourself.

January-February 2020

THIS IS NOT YOUR ORDINARY GET-AWAY! This is a one-of-a-kind, I’m serious about being seen in this world and it starts NOW kind of get-away! Because you are WORTH IT!

Be You Be Strong is an Elite Sanctuary for Women that have a burning desire to lead their lives without asking permission of others.

This Powerful supported gathering is designed to foster your unique personal story, and individual clarity and growth; all while nurturing the discovery of YOU and your personal brand.

Perks of this Sanctuary • 5 star accommodations in a luxury mansion • Entertainment, Great Conversations, and Deep Connections with 19 other ladies • Healthy food prepared by our personal Chef V Capaldi-The Paleo Boss Lady • Daily yoga, meditation, journaling and self love!

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• 4-week Accountability Coaching w/ Colleen & all attendees following the event • But, you have to Show Up to be seen...

SANCTUARY DATES: MARCH 26TH-29TH : ATLANTA, GA JUNE 4TH-7TH : UPSTATE NEW YORK JULY 16TH-19TH : COLUMBUS, OH SEPTEMBER 17TH-20TH : DALLAS, TX (Dates are subject to change)

Apply today, only 20 women will be chosen for each Sanctuary Your application will be used for the sanctuary you note on the application.

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