Healing of rejection

Healing of Rejection

Brendan Mc Crossan

One

Do you feel unwanted?

Manypeoplefeelunwanted;theyfeellikenobodycaresforthem,thefeelalone,insideofthem there is something missing, emptiness inside, and a hole that cannot be filled; even in a crowded room they feel alone and insecure, some like me over talk to compensate for my feelings of rejection from my parents. Now my parents never said to me they reject me or showed me in any way they didn’t want me. But inside me there was this sense that I had been unwanted, and an accident of conception; I wasn’t chosen to be wanted but an act of sexual intercourse that took place between my parents and out of that intimacy I was conceived.

I remember as a small child out playing in our family garden and my father came over to me and I looked up at him and said, “You’s don’t love me!” I don’t remember what he said back to me, but what I said had an effect on my mother for many times over our lifetime she would suddenly come out with the words I said to my father, “You’s don’t love me,” and she would make a joke of it, saying Brendan has a chip on his shoulder or some other remark and laugh; butshesaid this even on her dying bed as I talked with her aboutJesus loving her and forgiving her for all her sins and he promised her eternal life with him when she died; she asked Jesus into her heart and all her fear of dying left her, and when she eventually did die she died in great peace.

Shortly after she died, I awoke from my sleep by the sound of my bedroom door opening, and my mother entered the room with an angel beside her, she was radiant and her hair was blowing as if there was a wind, she looked at me as I looked at her, and I heard her say, “You were right.” She smiled and then left the room with her angel. I had told my mother as I said previously, that she would see that ‘I was right’ in what I said about Jesus and her getting into heaven. This gave me great Joy having never cried when my mother died. To know that I was the one that God used to bring my mother to Jesus and her salvation and then years later my father to Jesus also, was such a joy and honour for me. A few weeks later I cried about my mother as my wife on a healing weekend in Strabane prayed for me during her retreat, and I sensed my mother’s presence and missed her.

Still I walked around with an emptiness inside me; I remember many times I was at healing conferences and Charismatic conferences and I knew lots of people there and I sat alone feeling lost and lonely, even when friends I knew came and talked with me. I had this emptiness inside me that just would not go away. Even with good friends this forlorn feeling crept up inside, and I felt empty and I over talked to them boring them to death but couldn’t seem to stop when I got someone to listen to me. I spent many years of my life sitting doing something or other when a feeling of sadness swept over me and many times even watching some TV program I started crying for no reason. I know I lost out on being asked to speak at meetings because I over talked and I found it embarrassing and I cringed inside when I seen people trying to end the conversation and get away from me, I seen it in their eyes, and years

later when I see that look I just end the conversation as quick as I can, but sadly sometimes I just can’t seem to stop even when I know I should but there is something inside driving me on to talk, and I hate myself for wasting peoples time. I know that this all comes from a feeling of rejection from the womb as my parents discovered that my mother was pregnant with me and the initial reaction was, ‘Oh God no!’ I don’t want this baby; we can’t afford it or something else, everyone has their reasons for rejecting the child within the womb. For the majority of parents or mothers the feelings are they are not able to cope with another baby or they cannot deal with having a baby, because they were not married or some other reason. When the baby who is us are born, our parents see us and then they love us, for the majority of us, sadly not all of us, but the feelings inside are there remaining deep inside us, ‘reject,’ ‘we don’t want you,’ ‘go away,’ ‘leave me alone,’ ‘I need to get rid of ‘it,’ and some try to abort us and fail, but they try anyway and we feel every one of those feelings they felt, we feel their despair at finding out that they are pregnant with us, we feel their confusion, their fears, their guilt, their anxiety their attempts to abort us, we feel everything they go through and sadly we take it on board, we are rejected; as a child we don’t understand what’s happening with them we just feel the rejection or hear them say things to one another.

No amount of human love can ever replace those feelings inside us, no human touch can ever relievethedespair wehavewithin us atcertain times of theyear, especially ninemonths before our birthdays and even on our birthday those feelings are imbedded in us, they just don’t go away even on a birthday, the supposedly happiest day of our lives each year. On certain days and times of the year many people feel like committing suicide, and their emotions are dulled and the feelings of being unwanted overwhelm them at times and nothing but the grace of God gets them through those black days; the reason they feel like this only at those certain times is because that is probably when their mother tried to abort them.

Now this is not what happens in all cases; in some cases, the child within the womb hears everything that is being said and feels the feelings that the mother feels; that child may pick up those feelings of the mother wanting to commit suicide and again I say it is because of the grace of God that the mother does not harm herself or the baby, but those feeling remain with the baby, and they grow up feeling depressed at certain times of the year. I know that this is what happened to myself; because at certain times I just went into a darkness inside me and it was only when Rose my wife said these things happen to me at certain times of the year and she noticed the times they happen, that I realised my mother was probably going through some kind of trauma or another in her pregnancy; I know she did not have much support from my father and she went through terrible distressful times because of things he did during her pregnancy with me.

Mums and aunts talk when you grow up and let little things slip when they think you’re not listening, but tell me a child who is not listening even when they seem busy playing with toys or something. But they are picked up by sensitive people like me. I am very sensitive to others feelings and I can pick up when a person is smiling with their teeth almost touching the wall that inside they are in distress; I just look in their eyes and their eyes tell me the story of their feelings.

Those tired feeling as emptiness fills us on those special days is overwhelming, as we try to smile and show everyone we are so happy we just turned fifty or twenty, but deep down there is nothing there, just a black hole and it is not depression that afflicts us it is feeling unwanted. No one wanted me, I was unloved inside my mother’s womb, no one cared about me when I was listening to the rows between my parents as one said to the other, ‘Get rid of it,” I heard everything they said as did you who reads this. For me I probably wished I could die and just be gone away from those who didn’t want me, and I believe this because when I was born, I was born a very sickly child. I learned from people who were many years in the inner healing ministry that I probably didn’t want to live and was rejecting my own body, thereby allowing sickness and disease in to me, and the enemy was happy to oblige. But God had plans for me as he has plans for you, plans to give us a future and a hope, to use what we experienced to bring healing to others and they in turn when healed will be used to heal even more God’s children.

My mother and my aunt Bernie, who was my God mother, told me many times over the years, that I had every childhood disease that a child could have, inside of one year, and they believed that I would never live. My aunt Bernie told me every time I visited her as I was growing up, ‘no one believed that I would live through this disease or that disease’ and that many nights she and my mother and my mother’s sisters sat up all night waiting on me to die, and they prayed for me constantly. As a child growing up I contacted rheumatic fever and I was paralysed for a year at a time; I took it three times before I was fourteen. All my adult life I have lived with pain in my body, I am never without pain even today as I write this, and I believe this is because I was rejected and so I rejected my own body and that has never been healed until now as I write what I am about to write, and at this point I don’t even know what I am going to write but I know the Holy Spirit told me to write on this today and so I obey him as he knows what he is doing, as so I wait on him to open my spirit to hear his message to me. By the way I am now sixty four years old soon to be sixty five on the 12-06-12.

Maybe my life story is similar to yours; maybe you have felt those lonely empty feelings, that hole inside you that can’t be filled and you like me have waited years to be healed from these feelings, well like you I believe that the time for this is now, as God’s Holy Spirit has his way with us for God’s glory and our healing.

Only those who have these feelings inside know what I am talking about, and I am not talking about depression because I have felt depressed at times in my life but depression does not even get close to these feelings of emptiness like there is nothing inside of me. No doctor can ever heal those feeling inside of us, no man can relieve the pain we feel, and no one can help us in this world. But we have a God who can heal us; we have a Son of God who can heal us as he suffered rejection from those he loved, scripture says he suffered everything every temptation every pain every feeling that we as human beings feel.

Our parent may have rejected us whilst we were in the womb for whatever reason they had but God never rejected us in fact he was the one who actually created us, and placed us in our mother’s womb during their act of intercourse.

Before I begin with the next stage of this little healing, let us both ask the Holy Spirit to begin healing those rejected feelings, deep inside us, with a prayer.

Prayer; “Holy Spirit you know me from before I was even formed in my mother’s womb, you knew that I was rejected, by my parents or by one of them, you know how deep my emptinessis, you know thosefeelingsIamexperiencing,you knowwhatcaused themand now I ask you to fill that empty void I feel, fill that hole with your divine light and love; let me experience the touch of your Holy love melting away those negative lonely feelings I feel and filling me with your diving presence replacing rejection with acceptance by you, give me joy for sadness, and compassion for others who feel like I do. Use my life in my mother’s womb be a source of healing for your children who feel like I do. Take from within me those things the enemy sowed and replace within me your divine seed of love and healing in Jesus name Amen

Two

The healing of our rejections

Hebrews 2-10-New Century Version (NCV)

God is the One who made all things and all things are for his glory. He wanted to have many children share his glory, so he made the One who leads people to salvation perfect through suffering.

Be patient as I share with you God’s word

Our parents may not have wanted to have children but God wanted children of his own and so he formed us in our mother’s womb; he never intended for us to be rejected but he gave human beings the right to have free will, and the act of sexual intercourse is an act between two people most times willingly and some not willingly at all, but in the act of intercourse the sperm meets the ovum when a woman is Ovulating and the child is conceived, and at that moment of conception God imparts to us life and a spirit. This was the day he intended to bring you into existence in this world, this was the day he chose for you to be conceived; his greatest desire was to have children as you seen from the previous scripture, children of his own, children that he could love and shower blessing after blessings upon. Because he is a God of free will and because he is the God who created procreation, the act of sexual intercourse as part of the human anatomy just as he created the air we breathe and we now pollute, he gave us the right to do things as we desire.

When a chicken has an egg, it is only when the Rooster has sex with the chicken does the egg get fertilised and become a chick; this is the same with all life including human life. All life is given the gift or reproduction and we are no different, so when our parents had sex and the sperm joined with the ovum we come into existence as part of the natural cycle of life, then God planted our spirit into that womb into the embryo.

When we were in that womb we were not alone; even when we were being rejected by our parents we still were not alone; God was in there with us telling us he wants us for his family; we may not have heard those words from him because we only heard words of rejection, disgust, and destroy it and that blocked out the words God was speaking over us whilst in that womb.

Just stop now for a moment and think, see yourself enclosed in your mother’s womb, you hear those words ‘reject it’ ‘get rid of it’ and you were referred to as ‘it,’ not even as a baby, just a thing to be gotten rid of. Now, be silent within yourself and listen quietly, silence those words of rejection, by your authority as a child of God you now possess.

Meditation; God wanted you

Listen to another voice speaking, a soft gentle firm voice as deep as the ages, saying. “You are precious to me little one.” “I have plans for you, to give you a future and a hope.” “I wanted you, in fact I created you billions of years ago and you spent those years with me in heaven.” “I spoke love into you,” “I gave you a desire to know me as your real father.” “To know the blessings that I have laid out before you” “I loved you so much, that I assigned one of my mighty angels to walk with you and to never leave you even for a second, their job was to keep you safe in this world, and they succeeded.”

“I want you to know me as Father and to understand how much I need you and love you; you are my beloved child, chosen from before the world even came into existence to be mine. Your mother’s womb was the vessel I chose to bring human and spiritual life to you, to walk in the works I have prepared for you.” To live the life I have chosen for you to live in Jesus your brother. Silence the enemy’s voice speaking words of rejection; use the name of Jesus to silence his taunting and listen only to my words of love and tenderness; see in my written word the depths of love I have surrounding you urging you on to greater things. See in them my words of tenderness and comfort know that these words are for you personally, each word I write is written with you in mind, so see those words as words of life, and life to the full for which I intended them to be. Now study my written word and let it nourish your spirit and soul and be healed.

God himself was with us all during our time in the womb, he is the one who created us there and imparted our spirit to our human bodies in love.

Psalm 139

Contemporary English Version (CEV)

You are the one who put me together inside my mother’s body, 14 and I praise you because of the wonderful way you created me.

Everything you do is marvellous! Of this I have no doubt.

15 Nothing about me is hidden from you!

I was secretly woven together deep in the earth below, 16 but with your own eyes you saw my body being formed. Even before I was born, you had written in your book

God’s word is the truth he is thinking of me every moment in my life even when I was rejected and not wanted, he was still thinking of me, loving me and he never stops thinking about me. If he stopped thinking about me I would cease to exist, I would be no more, I would disappear like a puff of smoke in the wind, but he does think of me, wanting me to understand the depth of his love for me. He wrote me a letter called scripture to let me know the fullness of his love for me and he showed me in his scripture, ‘his word,’ amazing blessings that have been stored up for me, because he wanted to shower on me gifts galore. He desired me to understand that I have a home, a Mansion here with him in heaven, and that he would cleanse me from all unrighteousness and make me forever perfect in his loving sight, that I was precious to him and beloved by him, and that he actually sang over me in happy song; expressing his deep unconditional love for me. He wants me to understand that he is my real father and that Jesus is actually my brother, and he loves us equally. No one could love us with the intensity of love that our heavenly Father has; he always wanted us, he never rejects us, he punishes us when we do wrong of course, just like any father punishes his child when they do wrong, to teach us the best way forward in life, he rejoices over us and can’t stop telling us how much he idolises us, how much his heart is filled with pure crystal clear unbridled love!

17How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! How great is the sum of them!

18If I should count them, They are more in number than the sand: When I awake, I am still with thee.

Isn’t it awesome to think that someone is thinking of you every second of the day? When we walk around doing things, we are never alone, we have Jesus with us everywhere we go, we have an angel beside us keeping us safe. When we were in the womb God was looking after us and when we were born he still watched over us with tenderness and love.

Psalm 22 Contemporary English Version (CEV)

9

You, LORD, brought me safely through birth, and you protected me when I was a baby at my mother’s breast.

10 From the day I was born, I have been in your care, and from the time of my birth, you have been my God.

From the moment we were conceived to the moment of our birth and afterwards God was taking care of us, he wanted us even if no one else did. He has walked through every moment of our lives never budging from us for even a split second, he not only is our God but he is also father to us.

Prayer for healing

Father you say you were with me from the moment of conception inside my mother’s womb; it was you who was forming my little body as I grew slowly there; you heard the words that were spoken over me, words of rejection and disgust; you tell me that every word we speak or someone else speaks must be accounted for before you. I hold no grudges against my parents or anyone else that expressed disgust at my life being formed in my mother’s womb; I forgive by an act of my will, those who rejected me, or didn’t see me as a human being, but as ‘it.’ I now ask you, knowing the power of the spoken word, to break off of me the effects and defects and attributes of those negative words spoken over my life in Jesus name. Those words have caused me to feel empty inside, to have a hole in my inner being, a longing to be loved for myself alone. Heal the wrong signals I send out to others subconsciously to reject me also, to stay away from me, to avoid me. Break off of me Lord all these affects and their effects on my soul, those things that cause me to react wrongly, and replace within me your mind and reactions to others. Fill those empty places with your divine love and emotions and with your peace within, fill every fibre of my being with your glorious light, in Jesus name.

Amen

Prayer of authority

Now In the name of Jesus I also break off of me every negative word spoken over me as a child within the womb, those words that have been placed as a curse upon me intentionally or unintentionally; I break those curses in Jesus name down through the months in my mothers womb and through the years of childhood growing up, through the teenage years and into my twenties, thirties and forties, fifties and now in my sixty forth year. Fill me with light lord. Thank you Father that you care so wonderfully for me in setting me free from all effects defects and attributes that held me in bondage in my lifetime. Thank you Jesus; thank you Holy Spirit for it is by your power that this has happened.

Amen

Now believe God that both prayers that you just prayed have worked and from this instance, things inside of you have changed so praise God for his healing and love.

As scripture says the prayer of a righteous man has great power and wonderful effect.

James 5

New International Version (NIV)

16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

You are a righteous man or woman who read this if Jesus is your lord and saviour, and your prayer has great power and effect.

Three

Showing you how much you are loved!

Ephesians 1-3-Contemporary English Version (CEV)

Praise the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ for the spiritual blessings that Christ has brought us from heaven!4 Before the world was created, God had Christ choose us to live with him and to be his holy and innocent and loving people.5 God was kind[b]and decided that Christ would choose us to be God’s own adopted children.6 God was very kind to us because of the Son he dearly loves, and so we should praise God.

Not only did God the Father chose us to be his children and he wanted us so much; but he chose us before the world was even created, we were spiritual beings living in heaven with God, and God so much loved us that he knew the only way to be loved equally in return was to give us free will, to do as we wanted so that we could return his love by wanting him because he is Father. So he created flesh and blood bodies and gave them life on this planet earth, and he put inside everyone in their DNA, that there is a God, and he loves us. Do we want to return his love freely because we want to? God showing his great love for us took a big chance on us in returning the love he shared with us.

He sacrificed everything by giving us human life with all its faults and failings in exchange for the chance of not being loved in return. This is how much the Father loved us and wanted us, he gave us free will to either love him back or to reject him and millions have already rejected him since the day they were placed in the earth. God knows the pain of rejection that pain does not just belong to you, your father God knows and understands the pain and suffering rejection causes; heknows thescars that areleft behind and thememories that remain buried deep inside of us, and he wants us to know that no matter who rejected us he always wanted us for his own, to love us because he is truly Father to us. ‘The life your parents gave you will fade away, but you have a new life one that will never fade and will last forever-1-Peter-1-23’

God feels the pain of rejection every time one of his children reject him in favour or the enemy and this worlds pleasures, he says, ‘he knows every hair on our head,’ so don’t think that when someone if Africa or Ireland or America rejects him that he does not feel that rejection, it is

inbuilt into his senses, the sense of one of his children rejecting him, he feels a part of him falling off.

Remember when a woman touched Jesus as he was surrounded by hundreds of people all pushing and shoving to be near to him to hear what he had to say, when he stopped and said, ‘somebody touched me, I felt power draining out of me,’ Jesus felt by his senses someone touched him in faith, and that faith drained healing power out of him; he felt it leave, just as he feels it leave when one of his own reject him in favour of something else. That woman who touched Jesus received her healing, she touched Jesus in faith, and faith moves God he senses it in us, and he also senses unbelief and rejection. He is a sensitive loving caring God who is closely connected to us his children. In much the same way a mother can sense that one of her children has died even when they are far from home in another country, even when she hasn’t seen them for many years, she still senses them alive or when they die, because a part of her feels that leaving of their spirit, separating from her spirit. God feels that part of his connection to one of his children who die spiritually and mourns for them.

The act of giving us free will was the greatest sacrifice after Jesus that the Father would ever do, this is his greatest demonstration of how much he loves us and still does. ‘Love me because I love you,’ every human being want to be loved just for themselves, not to be loved for this reason, or for that reason but because I am me. God loves me because I am me and for no other reason just because he wants to love me. He loves you because you are you because you are his child the one he desired to have. Out of love he created me and out of love he wants to bless me, he is the one doing all the giving. Just like the angels God gave them free will and a lot of them rejected his love and care including his beloved Lucifer, his most beautiful angel, and they rebelled against God; so God cast them out of heaven. And he still gave us free will also, even when the angels, who have the gift of free will, rejected him. God took a chance on us even after being rejected by his own Holy angels. He wanted to see if we would return his love, to be loved for himself not because he is God and can do things for us. God knows rejection personally.

1 John 4

Contemporary English Version (CEV)

9God showed his love for us when he sent his only Son into the world to give us life.10Real love isn’t our love for God, but his love for us. God sent his Son to be the sacrifice by which our sins are forgiven. 11 Dear friends, since God loved us this much, we must love each other

God showed his love for us when he sent Jesus to take the punishment for our sins that separated us from him, he never separated himself from us, and it was we who rejected him he never rejects us not ever, not even when we sin or run away from him, he still stands ready to receive us back. Don’t ever think that sin can keep God away from you; it is you who feel that you can’t come near him because of your sin. God sacrificed Jesus for that sin and for all the worlds’ sins.

Can we love God more than he loves us? No! His love is unconditional our love is conditional for the majority of us; no man can love us like God loves us because he knows every minute flaw we have inside us.

God put you before his son Jesus and that is hard to understand because we know God loved Jesus because he was his only son; but God does not think or love like man, he wanted other children for his own, and he knew the only way he could have children like himself with free will was by making Jesus a sacrifice for us; he knew sin separated us from him and he knew the only way to deal with sin was to sacrifice his holy son for our sins thereby making us holy like him, and Jesus agreed to this plan of God because it was worked out from before time.

Healing rejection through the word of God

1-Peter-2-The Way Bible

Dear friends, God the Father chose you long ago and knew you would become his children, and the Holy Spirit has been at work in your hearts cleansing you with the blood of Jesus and making you to please him.

A parent washes their child keeping them clean, well God’s Holy Spirit is like a nanny watching over you and cleaning you every time dirt gets on you, he washes you with the cleansing blood of Jesus, and holy blood much better than carbolic soap can. All this is an expression of how much you are wanted by God your father, so no matter who didn’t want you, he wanted you and me. No matter who rejected us for whatever reason he loved and accepted us for his reasons - pure love!

When did God chose you? ‘Long ago even before he actually made the world’ ‘Ephesians -1-4,’ before you could do anything right or wrong, he chose to make you, to create you so he could shower love upon you and love you because you are his own child made in his divine image, Genesis-1-27. Imaging that, you who feel so much rejected and unwanted were chosen before the creation of the earth and made in the divine image of God himself. No amount of human love that we could receive in a lifetime could ever make up for one moment of being made in the Divine image of God your father.

Children look like their parents for the most of us anyway, but all God’s children resemble him, we are holy spotless clean shining as bright as the noonday sun, and we look like dad.

This little book is called healing of rejection and you may wonder why I seemed to go into scripture and explain it, the simple reason is God wants you to know how precious you are to him; so precious that he made you exactly like him and Jesus, and this is in your spirit not your flesh. When God looks at you with a great big grin on his face he sees mini God’s looking back at him so no wonder Jesus in scripture says; “Did He not say you are God’s?” John-10-34

The only way to know someone is to spend time with them on a one to one basis, and that is exactly the same with your heavenly Father; if you would just spend time every day reading his letter to you, you would see how much he loves and cares for you, you would see his

greatest desire was to bless you. He made you Holy Spotless and clean and forever perfect in his sight, so when he looks at you he sees perfection in the spirit and adores you and is tickled pink when you begin to believe him. No greater love has anyone than to lay down his life for his friends and Jesus laid down his life for us his friends and brothers and sisters.

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Even the Jewish leaders and the Pharisees said that God was their true father.

John-8-41 –The Way Bible

They replied, “We were not born out of wedlock – Our true Father is God.”

Jesus rebuked them and said their “real father was the devil”-John-8-44.

The reason all this scripture is so important to us who have suffered rejection is so that we can first or all realise that God indentifies with us in rejection and so does our brother Jesus as he was rejected as well, and that we were not a matter of sex between two people either willing or by rape or any other way, but that we were an act of a loving Father God, who had planned for us to come into being from billions of years before the beginning of the world and kept in heaven, and at a certain time in history we would be conceived in a human body in our mother’s womb and our spirit planted into us at that momentous moment in time.

I matters not if you were the result of an ‘accident’ by your parents, you were planned to be; it does not matter if you were the result of your mother being raped, you were planned. God wanted you and he always wanted you; God knows the total picture of your life, in this life you are only here for a split second in eternity, {a lifetime for us} but when you leave this world you go back to living outside of time in eternity; this is why scripture says you must be born again of the spirit. You were created before the world began remember, so where were you all this time until you were conceived in your mother’s womb? You were kept safe in heaven with God waiting until the time when you would be sent down into your mother’s womb and to live your life accepting or rejecting God because he wants to be loved for himself alone, not even because he is God but because he is Father! After you died while still alive in this flesh body you were instantly taken back up into heaven with Jesus and you are seated there with him in the heavenly realms right this very instant that you accepted Jesus as lord. This is the secrets that scripture talks about, a mystery revealed through Jesus as another scripture tells us.

Your real life is in heaven with Christ and God, and when Christ who is your real life.

Four

You make God sing

God has big plans for you because you are wanted and loved by him after all you need to keep reminding yourself that you are made in his Divine image, you look just like God in your spirit, and your spirit will live back in eternity with God, and a very happy God who sings over you in happy song!

Zephaniah-3-17/18- The Way Bible

“Is that a joyous choir I hear? No, it is the Lord himself exulting over you in happy song;”

God rejoices and sings in happy song over you, has anyone else rejoiced over you and sang happy songs about you? If no one else has, at least you know that God, Almighty God the creator of the entire universe and the heavens sings over you in happy song, he delights in you and me.

This is how much you are wanted and loved, you make God happy; “he rejoices over you in great gladness; he will love you and “not accuse you.” Zephaniah-17/18

You make God happy and he rejoices over you, rejoices means celebrates with great joy, and you need to think often of this because this world would make us believe that we make God unhappy; God does not accuse us nor condemn us Romans -8-1- there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. The Way Bible God is never unhappy with us or accuses us unlike our parents or friends or teachers or those in authority over us or class mates or workmates, those who may reject us because we don’t conform to their image of what we should be like.

You are beloved of God and the word beloved means that you are, much-loved, dearly loved, adored, favourite, darling, treasured and dear. When God calls you his beloved, he knows the depth of the meaning of the word beloved, and he means every word; he absolutely adores you, he spends every split second with you, so no matter where you go he is still there with you watching over you smiling at you drinking you in just looking at you with a deep loving gaze.

Though no one may have wanted you or just one parent wanted you, God wanted you. Though your friends growing up rejected you; God smiled his precious smile on you treasuring your every prayer or words to him. He listened intently to what you had to say he never missed a word, and even though you may have thought he wasn’t listening to you or heard your cries of despair, he was there comforting you through it all, you just were not tuned into hearing from him, and at the same time, you, unaware of it were growing stronger and stronger not weaker and weaker as you thought; his love was giving you grace to bear up to all you were going through, because there was coming a day in the future that he was going to bless you greater than you could ever dream.

He sees the overall plan how one person fits in with another person and they interact with someone else, and they with others all interacting and fitting into one gigantic plan of his for our good. Different aspects of our lives touch and help someone’s life and they in turn at the same time fit in with someone else’s solution.

I know from experience how one man touched my life, a man called ‘Michael Cullen,’ and I inturntouchedthousandsofothersovertheselastthirty-fiveyears,notonlydidthismantouch my life but I know that he touched thousands of others also throughout the world; but I need only look at his words to me were words used by God to touch me and helped change me from a terrorist who hated people into a means of healing for God. His words were spoken to me during a time of turmoil in my life. Outside were the British Soldiers who had just killed two comrades of mine in the IRA and a massive crowd was rioting and we were inside a community hall at a charismatic conference where this man was the main speaker, and I was

in two minds to leave and go take up a gun and fight again or to stay and give God praise; I stayed. Glory to God

The words this man spoke to me after the meeting was over were, “God says to go to a place called Columba House.” A Few days later I did go and as I went I saw an opportunity to kill at least a dozen soldiers with a remote controlled bomb, and I stood looking at this place when his words again came into my mind, ‘go to Columba House,’ and putting aside my thoughts of killing I went around the corner and joined the Columba House community, my life was changed for the better.

One man can change an entire life and save the life of many without even knowing, one man Jesus Christ changed our destiny. What you went through can be used by God to bring healing to others; so you went through rejection from one or both parents or from those you loved, your heavenly Father can use that to bring him glory and you healing and helping others through what you went through. You know something if you are reading this then you went through something to get to this point; you went through it; you’re not still stuck in it, and God is using it to bring you great joy and happiness, you just don’t see that yet, you are so focused on your rejection, not your acceptance and being wanted by Almighty God. If the whole world rejects me and only God wants me then life is worth it; I am blessed, I am loved by Almighty God and Jesus, nothing else is worth anything compared to that.

Prayer

Lord let my perspective be changed from this moment on; help me to realise that I am loved by you my Father who is Almighty God; help me see with eyes of faith how much I am truly loved just because I am a Son / Daughter of Almighty God.

Five

God calls me Beloved of God

2-Peter-3:8-King-James-Version

But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.

God calls you his beloved and as you just read, that word has such an extraordinary wealth of meaning in it. You spend eternity with and In God and as that scripture showed you, a day is like a thousand years to the lord, there is no time in eternity. And that is where you are in right now through Jesus your brother but still on this earth, connected to Jesus and seated in heaven andconnectedtoyourspiritinsideyourbodywhereGodthefather,sonandHolyTrinitydwell. Don’t try and analyse it, just believe it because God says so in his word.

Romans-9:25-King-James-Version

as he saith also in Hosea, I will call them my people, which were not my people; and her beloved, which was not beloved.

Beloved means that your God’s wee darling, his wee favourite, his treasured and dear child.

Scripture to reinforce your status of being loved by God

Below are some scriptures to reinforce your understanding of the love God has for his beloved, you! Please read them and read them and thank God for them and they will become a part of you and you of them. Read them and re-read them day and night; meditate in them until you havecometo therealisation thatyou werewanted and loved by thegreatestperson in theentire universe Almighty God who is your Father.

John-1:13 Good-News-Translation

They did not become God's children by natural means, that is, by being born as the children of a human father; God himself was their Father.

God himself is our Father

2 -15-Thessalonians 2:15-17-Contemporary English Version (CEV)

My friends, that’s why you must remain faithful and follow closely what we taught you in person and by our letters.16 God our Father loves us. He is kind and has given us eternal comfort and a wonderful hope. We pray that our Lord Jesus Christ and God our Father 17 will encourage you and help you always to do and say the right thing.

God our Father loves us; he is kind to us and comforts us when we are in times of trouble. This scripture reinforces the words “God Our Father,” God keeps reminding us that he is God our Father, he God is Father to us.

Colossians-3:12-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV) God loves you and has chosen you as his own special people. So be gentle, kind, humble, meek, and patient.

God loves me and has chosen me from billions of people to be his alone. He says we are his own special people. I have never been special to anyone apart from Rose my wife; have you ever been special to anyone? Well you can see now that you are special to God.

2-Thessalonians-2:16-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV) God our Father loves us. He is kind and has given us eternal comfort and a wonderful hope. We pray that our Lord Jesus Christ and God our Father

God our Father gives us wonderful hope and comfort when there is no hope or comfort in this world.

2-Thessalonians-2:13-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV)

[ Be Faithful ] My friends, the Lord loves you, and it is only natural for us to thank God for you. God chose you to be the first ones to be saved. His Spirit made you holy, and you put your faith in the Father.

God chose me to be among the first ones saved for heaven, to enjoy eternal life with him and Jesus and his Holy Spirit. In this scripture the author encourages you to understand that ‘the lord loves you’ and me. He chose us, no one else may have chosen us but he chose us.

1-John-3:1-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV)-

Think how much the Father loves us. He loves us so much that he lets us be called his children, as we truly are. But since the people of this world did not know who Christ is, they don’t know who we are.

God loves us and calls us his own children and we truly are. You are encouraged to think about this, always keep it in your mind, then when trouble comes around and it will, you will know that you are loved by Almighty God who alone can and will help you in your trials.

2-Thessalonians-2:16-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV)God our Father loves us. He is kind and has given us eternal comfort and a wonderful hope He loves us though the world rejects us he loves us.

Jude-1:1-Contemporary-English-Version (CEV)

From Jude, a servant of Jesus Christ and the brother of James. To all who are chosen and loved by God the Father and are kept safe by Jesus Christ.

Were chosen and loved, the lord keeps encouraging us to know we were chosen and were loved in these scriptures his word, his letter to us just in case we forget; it’s there in black and white for us to read and then re-read again and again, until there is no doubt left in our minds.

Philemon-1:3Contemporary-English-Version (CEV)

I pray that God our Father and our Lord Jesus Christ will be kind to you and will bless you with peace!

Believe in the love of God for you, believe that you were wanted and loved, even if no one loved you before know that you were loved from the beginning and are still loved for eternity.

Six

Your rejected child can be healed through you!

For those who have rejected a child in the womb, there is healing available for you, God can and will useyou to healthoseemotions of rejection and diseases caused by rejecting your child whilst in the womb. The first thing a mother or father feels after their child is born and they did not want it whilst it was still in the womb is guilt. Their child is born and they see it and the emotions of love well up in them and they begin to love their child and they regret wanting

rid of it, and soon they bury those feelings and emotions, but they are still there inside of them buried deep and deeper as the years go along, and every so often those feelings and guilt arise again; even more so if their child was born with a defect. God wants to heal you as well as heal your child of whatever defect or disease it may have. I will give you an example.

Coleraine healing

I was asked if I could come to Coleraine to pray with a very sick boy and his sister, both suffered from eczema. So I went with the lady who asked me to pray with these children to their home; and I met the father and mother, and I sat and talked with them a while. After a while the Holy Spirit drew my attention to the words the mother kept saying, and I listened intently to what she said; she said, “I was disgusted when I found out I was pregnant at over forty years of age,” she kept repeating how disgusting she felt, and how she didn’t wish to be pregnant because it was disgusting a woman of her age in hospital in labour surrounded by kids as she called them, ages ranging from sixteen to twenty, she felt disgusted to be giving birth to a baby at her age and even worse to be in the same room as young kids giving birth.

Then the Holy Spirit told me; “she needs to repent of not wanting her child, and she needs to forgive herself for not wanting him.” then she needs to go to her child as he is asleep and tell him she is sorry for rejecting him and for saying how she felt whilst carrying him in her womb. But she loves him since the moment he was born. She promised me she would though saying that it sounded nuts to her.

She called her son a Johnny Walker baby, {Johnny Walker is an Irish whiskey,} meaning she was drunk when she conceived him.

She then asked her husband to go and get the little boy who was about seven or eight, I can’t remember.

When her husband brought the boy down the stairs I was horrified to see him, he looked disgusting, his body was covered from head to toe with open wounds with dark yellow puss flowing from them, there was not a part of his little body that did not look disgusting, blood and puss mixed together, he stank of this, his face was unrecognisable it was just an open sore; blood and puss and broken skin covered him, my heart felt so sad for to see this little boy and then she told me he has never been out in the street playing with other children, that broke my heart.

The boy’s older sister was also present and she was also covered in eczema but she didn’t have the same terrible wounds and puss coming from hers; hers looked more dried skin, deep red rash.

I felt led by the Holy Spirit to say a prayer with the young girl and the Holy Spirit revealed her eczema was caused by the trauma of having to move home and losing all her little friends; so I prayed that the lord would heal this trauma and give her new friends right away, in Jesus name; and for the eczema to go in Jesus name.

The little girl then asked could she leave as other kids were playing in the street and she wanted to watch them, so her mum said ok your finished here go on out. I then said a small prayer over the little boy and said it was time for me to go. And the mother promised she would do what I told her; so I left.

A few days later I received a phone call from my friend asking me if I could come to Coleraine the next day to go and see these people again; so I agreed, and next day I went to Coleraine and met with Carol my friend and we went to the parents house of the kids I prayed with. The mother met us at the door and invited us in and she then began telling us what happened.

She said that both she and her husband went into the boys bedroom that night and whispered to him as he slept, they were sorry for not wanting him and for saying they were disgusted, but that they wanted him now more than anything and they loved him. Then they went to bed.

In the morning the little boy went into their bedroom and he was ten times worse than ever, so they called the doctor who rushed him into hospital, and the hospital specialist dressed his wounds putting cream on them saying there was nothing else he could do for him as there was no cure for his type of eczema. He told them he would be around the next morning to re-dress his wounds and when he arrived the next morning and began taking the bandages off he was shocked to discover that the boy’s skin was brand new underneath the bandages; just like a baby’s skin there was no eczema of any kind; he told the mother as he pointed upwards towards the sky it was a miracle, as only God could do this.

The mother told he daughter to go and get the little boy as he was in the street playing on his bike; it took the girl quite a while before she returned with the boy, explaining she couldn’t catch him or his friends as they were racing around the block on their bikes. The mother told him to take off his top and show me and praise the Lord God for he alone is good I seen brand new fresh glowing skin, with absolutely no sign of any eczema, except for one little line between his first and second finger, and I asked the lord why was this there and he said it will always be there to remind him when he was grown up, that he, God, healed him. This was an awesome miracle that God done and it happened because the parents repented for what they said and done whilst he was in the womb. I looked at the little girl and I seen that her eczema had disappeared also and she had friends waiting for her outside the door. We serve a loving caring God, who desires us to be healed in every part of our beings spiritually as well as physically. God is good!

If you have rejected your child whilst in the womb, you can do what the spirit told this parents to do, so simple but miraculous. Amen