Born to Ride Southeast #127 - September 2023

BORN TO RIDE

PO BOX 3021

PUBLISHER

Ron Galletti

813-785-3895

888-795-5779

rg@borntoride.com

CO-PUBLISHER

Deb Galletti dgalletti@borntoride.com

EDITOR

Dave Nichols editor@borntoride.com

ART DIRECTOR

Peter Soutullo art@borntoride.com

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Erick Runyon

ART DEPARTMENT

Erick Runyon , Peter Soutullo, Craig Miller art@borntoride.com

OFFICE ADMINISTRATION

Deb Galletti DGalletti@borntoride.com

SALES & MARKETING

888-795-5779

ROAD CREW

Vick Velosity, Mark Crowder, Doug Bright, Birdman Mike,

SCENICRIDECONSULTANT

Steve Finzelber-Finz Finds

ON THE ROAD TEAM

John & Heather

CONTRIBUTORS

JP Brady, Neale Bayly, Susan

Hurst, Spyke & Mike, Eric

Albright, Paul Murray, James Gladstone, Scott Odell

Indian Rider Bill.

The Phantom

PHOTOGRAPHERS

Ron & Selena Hawks, Doug Bright

Daniel Gallant, Scott Odel, Eric

Albright, Chopper Dave, JP Brady, Erick Runyon, Craig Miller

Vic Lawall

LAW FIRM

FRAN HAASCH LAW GROUP

www.LawFran.com

866 LAW Fran

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HOWDY BROTHERS AND SISTERS!

The succulent September issue of Born To Ride is absolutely packed to the gills in amazing two-wheeled splendor! Our cover story this month is about Hawgfest in Carlsbad, New Mexico. The fun takes place on September 21st through the 24th. It’s bigger, badder, and bolder with more of what a biker rally is all about. It’s all happenin’ out at Eddy County Sherriff’s Posse Arena. You’ll find a massive carnival with rides and games for the whole damned family! Rock out to a Kid Rock tribute “Kid Cocky”, an ACDC tribute “The Jack”, a ZZ Top tribute, “ZZKC”, and a Def Leopard tribute “Def Leggend.”

Just let us know why you should win! Send 100 words or less to info@borntoride.com

Then we’ll bring you a story about five brothers who were born to ride as we look back at a story we first published in 2007. about the hard ridin’ Crowder family. Enjoy this southern style ride, Father’s Day celebration honoring the 75th birthday of dad Tom Chrowder and a memorial for biker friend Tom Haws. It’s a story about motorcycles, tattoos, and the biker brotherhood that you won’t soon forget.

Whew! I’m getting’ all sweaty tellin’ ya about this issue. That’s because there’s still MORE including Nefarious James who is officially puttin’ pedophiles on notice. No baby buggers allowed! Then Spyke & Mike will calm you down with a letter they got from WalMart that will have you grabbin’ yer spleen (whatever that means). It’s all comin’ at ya WAY too fast in the September issue of Born To Ride.

You need more? You crave more? Well, BTR is here for ya. We’ll bring you cool coverage of the 10th Annual Cave Spring Motorcycle Rally & Music Festival right here in this issue you are holding in yer greasy mitts. And let’s not forget the Cave Spring Boots & Dukes Winner exclusive feature of Haileigh Sealock, because it’s all here in this issue! That’ ain’t all. Win a free stay at Camp Easy Ride, the great alternative to sleeping on the ground at your next run or rally. We’re giving away a free stay at this party central chillabration and moto-glamping experience during the Sturgis Rally 2024!

Don’t forget, if you have a biker friendly establishment, we want to know about it. Support BTR by takin’ out an ad. And all you riders out there, please join our Facebook Group to find likeminded brothers and sisters out there and let’s all meet up to witness the glory of biker legends and dirty rotten scoundrels on Boss Hogg Radio every Thursday night on Facebook and on YouTube. That’s it. That’s all I gotta say. Now get out there and ride until you can’t feel your face.

— Dave Nichols editor@borntoride.com

BIGGER, BADDER, BOLDER.

Curtis /Hawgfest the new Ride 2023 Bigger, Badder, Bolder. Tell me about this great event!

Thank you, Ron for the amazing job you do with Born To Ride. Such a great publication. You know, I have been to large events across the country for fifteen years now. I find myself admiring different aspects and visions of other organizers, and throughout the years, have tried to learn from some of these great folks. Hawgfest is a culmination of concerts, food, vendors, bikes, beer, cannabis and of course the massive carnival. It’s like a mini theme park; on one end of the property you have badass bands playing, on the other you have thrill rides, full bar, Number JUAN Tequila flowing with vendors in between. Oh, and a cool adult Cannabis Expo in the middle with an outdoor lounge area. Something for every demographic and loaded with fun.

Alex/ Number JUAN Tequila is on fire. In a crowded platform how do you separate from the others? Give us a little background of this fabulous brand.

Number JUAN believes in three things: Quality, FUN, and Community.

Any success is because we work hard at FUN and people respond when you genuinely care about their experience. People trust us with their FUN and we are men of our word.

I’ve been enjoying Tequila since before I was legally allowed to. It was 2011, with both Ron White’s and my comedy careers in full throttle. During a drinking crawl (as we call them) in Mexico, Ron and I literally stumbled into the Rivesca Distillery. We were merely in search of a great day of drinking and to add another fun story to our long relationship. We had no idea

that we were about to become a bridge to sharing an amazing Tequila with the USA. After tasting, it was obvious to us both that the entire lineup was (in our opinion) the best Tequila we had ever consumed. We simply wanted to drink it from then on. We learned that Rivesca had no presence in the USA, and we just couldn’t allow that to be the case any longer. We truly admire this small batch (NO DIFFUSER or ADDITIVE), family-owned distillery that has been producing amazing Tequila for nearly seven decades now. They have been farming their lands for almost a century and they simply will not compromise the integrity of the soil, agave, or distillation process for mass production. They are artists true to their craft, which is why Ron and I were drawn to and respect the Rivesca Distillery aka Familia Rivera. Our vantage point in this crowded platform has very few but much respected peers. Cheers to all great Tequila makers, we’re Number JUAN!

Alex/ Being the presenting sponsor of HAWGFEST how do you see this relationship growing and what can we expect to see at the event from you?

New Mexico has always been a special state to me both comedically and

personally. I have many great friends and fans throughout the state. The state has embraced Number JUAN Tequila and so it only made sense to give back by being a part of one of Carlsbad, New Mexico’s great traditions;,HAWGFEST. Raising money & awareness for a great cause while having FUN... Number JUAN is all over it. I will personally be on hand instigating FUN anywhere and anyway I can. Number JUAN promises to offer delicious Tequila and refreshing cocktails with no artificial sugars = A NO HEADACHE PARTY! We look forward to working with Curtis and all the HAWGFEST sponsors to enhance what’s always been a great party into a BIGGER & BETTER PARTY... The Number JUAN HAWGFEST ever!

Curtis / Number JUAN Tequilas commitment to HawgFest is powerful and strong to help the New Ride roll with power. How important is it to support this brand?

When I first met Alex, I was very impressed. Alex is one of the hardest working people I know. His commitment to his comedy, his family, and now Number JUAN Tequila is infectious. Alex is always looking to be the best and that is exactly the kind of partnership Hawgfest needed. I am always looking to learn and watching Alex and learning from him is such an amazing opportunity for me and Hawgfest.

Curtis / You chose to leave Budweiser and moved to Miller / Coors brands.That was a bold move. Why did you do that, and do you have regrets?

I had worked with Budweiser for over a decade. Our local distributor is awesome, seriously good people. When I saw the ad campaign from Bud Light, I had to

make decisions. Look, I don’t judge people for their life decisions. Honestly, I don’t shove my beliefs in marriage or God or the differences between a man and woman down people’s throats and I don’t want it shoved down mine. To each their own. That said, I am not making Hawgfest a political playground. It’s not that. I made the decision to end my relationship with Budweiser and didn’t look back. It opened the door for some amazing opportunities with Coors, Miller DosEquisXX, Corona, Twisted Tea and other brands that just blew me away. They care about selling beer, supporting Hawgfest and not all the stuff that divides us. I can’t speak highly enough about the folks we are working with now.

Curtis / You have the carnival, the live entertainment and the true history of Carlsbad New Mexico all part of your demographic. The economic impact you are bringing to your City and State are very valuable. Congratulations! Why do people need to be at Hawgfest?

Carlsbad, New Mexico is home to the Carlsbad Caverns National Park, the Pecos River and a great community. Watching Hawgfest grow and bringing people to town makes me proud. Knowing that folks get to see the beauty of the desert and all our community has to offer makes me proud. The sense of family and friends coming to New Mexico and enjoying a few days of fun together, that makes me proud... it’s priceless.

Curtis / With biker clubs lately being tied to violence, are bikers welcome? Are clubs welcome? Explain your stance so everyone will know.

Of course, bikers are welcome. Everyone is welcome. You know, it makes me sad

to see the violence happening around the country. It’s like we’ve lost our way. The Red River shooting scared folks. I started watching events cancel and that sucks. As a promoter, I have to ensure people feel safe and do my best to make that happen. I made the hard decision to not allow colors at the event. I of course had Veterans and non 1% clubs telling me their club was not a 1% club and they should be allowed to wear

apologize for trying to keep our event as safe as possible so our attendees are comfortable.

Curtis / Your commitment to charity says a lot about you. Give us a update on how you are giving back to your community and why.

their colors. Unfortunately, Joe public doesn’t understand the ways of that lifestyle, they can’t differentiate. They see the patches and assume what they assume. The no color rule is across the board at Hawgfest. I do want to say this to the people upset about that rule. It’s not me or other promoters that wanted to do this. We had to. Insurance costs, public safety, all that comes into play. When these clubs have an incident at an event, like Red River, they are not thinking about the impact it has on every aspect of not only the event but the community, the kids there, etc. I ride and have my whole adult life, so I get it, but I also understand that we have to make tough decisions, and if that upsets people, I apologize. But I will not

My wife and father are cancer survivors. Until I saw first hand how hard that road was for them, I hadn’t thought much about cancer. Yeah, I knew it was bad, but out of sight, out of mind. After I saw the great work the American Cancer Society did for my family, I knew Hawgfest had to get involved and join the fight. This is dear to me now. Alex will tell you the same. We want to help all we can. I understand Hawgfest won’t be the end all or anything like that, but if our donation can make any sort of impact with research or helping a family with hotel expenses, food, whatever, then that is a total success in my book. The American Cancer Society and Fork Cancer do great work and we are extremely happy to partner with them.

Alex / Last words ? Curtis / Last words ?

First, thank you Ron for everything you do. You have always been a huge supporter of Hawgfest and me personally. Second, find a store and pick up a bottle of Number JUAN Tequila. You won’t find better. Trust me! Seriously, come to Hawgfest. We are all a big family and we love making new friends. You won’t regret it. I want to thank all of our sponsors that make this happen every year and tell all of our Hawgfest friends that we love and appreciate you folks. Thank you, Ron. SEE

RIDE APPALACHIA

As we move into the later months of Summer and into cooler Fall riding here on the Backroads of Appalachia, we prepare for some of our biggest events and rides of our season. From the Charitable Mercy Medical Angels who attend our Annual “Rebel’s Ride” Event each year at the Whitley County Airport, to the Advanced Riders who have waited all year to tackle Appalachia’s Most Demanding Trail Route, “The IRON”, encompassing 563 Mile, 3 State Lines, and plenty of Appalachian Mountain Curve Awesomeness. There is simply nothing like our Appalachian IRON Butt challenge anywhere out there and it includes 6 of our most popular trail routes including the Dragonslayer 160 and Coal Train 421 just to name a few. Due to these demanding requirements only one group ride is held each year on “The IRON’ and this ride is definitely for the advanced riders out there due to the technical skill and endurance required to complete this route. It is also the only time you can earn the coveted “IRON” patch without completing it within 24 hours. The “IRON” Patch is the only patch in our system that can only be earned by completing the challenge and cannot be purchased. Earning this Patch proves you are an Appalachian “IRON” Warrior and very few riders have accomplished this challenge. In other words it’s a big deal and mucho braggin’ rights! This is just one of many great events held in September by the Whitley County Motorcycle Group, the Motorcycle side of Backroads of Appalachia. Although there is ton

of great riding to do here all season long, the Fall months bring cooler riding weather and mother nature begins to take over our mountains creating one of the most incredible season changes found anywhere in the world. With over 5000 Miles of GpsEnabled routes to experience and 4 states, our free Backroads of Appalachia Mobile Application is truly a Rider’s best friend showcasing the absolute best that Central Appalachia has to offer for those who want to take “The Road Less Traveled”. If a main street atmosphere, vendors, live music, and custom bike shows are more your style then you do not want to miss our Annual HARLAN BIKEFEST and Custom Bike Show in late September in Downtown Harlan, Kentucky. Just a few miles from some of our absolute favorite rides! All of these great rides and events can be found on our Backroads of Appalachia Mobile Application, Our Website, and of course on our Facebook pages. So what are you waiting for? The best riding, scenery, and point of interest you will find anywhere out there is waiting for you right here on the Backroads of Appalachia! Join our Motorcycle Movement today, Download our Mobile Application and Join us on Facebook to be “In the Know” on all things motorcycle here in the Central Appalachian Region. You will be glad you did!

-Jay Fryman Founder, Whitley County Motorcycle Group Backroads of Appalachia Journalism Team

This month Born To Ride reviews the 1971 film “Psychomania.” If you like old British horror films, then this one’s for you. Maybe I should have said horrible old British films. Either way, Psychomania has a lot to like or dislike, depending on your level of intoxication.

The film centers around the life of “Tom” who is the leader of a ‘motorcycle gang’ called the Living Dead. Tom and his ‘gang’ ride authentic period Triumph motorcycles, and meet in a field with several large vertical

stones which somewhat resemble Stonehenge. When they gather there, they often discuss what they will do in the particular day, but there is always talk of committing suicide, so they can live forever. Where could they get such an unsavory idea? From Tom’s occultist Mum of course!

In a dream like sequence, Tom has the pleasure of seeing his lovely Mum sign a deal with the Devil to have eternal life. His soul is assumed to be part of the deal, as thereis a tot in a basket screaming as Mum

signs the deal. All this weirdness is further accelerated by a frog. I dunno? It’s just strange. We’ll get to the Frog—plus stones thing later.

On one particular day, Tom and his gang decide to ride through town and wreak havoc on the locals. They ride through a mall square like setting, tipping over shopping carts, baby carriages, and other things until the Bobbies arrive. A chase ensues and most of the members escape the long arm of the law. Tom hell-bent on killing himself rides his motorcycle through a guardrail and into the river. In a strange ritual, Tom is buried sitting upright on his motorcycle near the stones. His gang makes wreaths of flowers and other artifacts, which are buried with him as a guy plays the guitar and sings. Mum’s weird butler buries a frog necklace with him and all the other stuff. Later, a motorist breaks down near the stones, and has the horror of seeing Tom ride his motorcycle out of the grave. He of course is struck by the speeding Triumph and assumed dead. Tom then proceeds to call home from a local public house, and speaks to the butler and his Mum. Later he kills several people from the pub, and escapes into the night. The next day he arrives at the stones where the gang is trying to figure out who stole Tom’s body, and motorcycle. Thinking Tom is the thief, the gang begins questioning him and one of the members sneaks up to stab him in the back. This is where they realize that Tom had really come back from the dead. Seeing how cool it is to be immortal, the rest of the gang sets out to be just like Tom and each one kills him or herself in increasingly more bizarre ways. All succeed but Tom’s girlfriend, who after a failed attempt, really wants to live a normal life.

In the end Tom gives her the ultimatum to join him in the ‘living dead.’ While she is deciding what to do with the gun he has handed her, his lovely Mum performs a ritual which turns her into a frog, and the rest of the ‘dead gang’ into stones while she shoots Tom. Sound confusing? Yeah, it does to me too! I guess the moral of the story is: Don’t feel too froggy, cause you might get stoned.

MEET RICK STEWART

You can find him most days in our Greenville, South Carolina Office but he has clients all over the state. Although he is new to our law team, he is not new to fighting for injured riders and motorists. That has been his passion for the last 20 years. He is dedicated to providing outstanding service and availability to our South Carolina clients which is exactly what makes him the perfect fit for the Motorcycle Law Group’s team.

Rick grew up in West Greenville the son of a disabled father and hard working mother. They lived in a double-wide trailer that his grandma allowed them to put on her property. He witnessed a lot of unfair things happen to his parents and swore when he got older he would help the “Davids” of this world battle all Goliaths. He was unaware at that time that most Goliaths nowadays are insurance companies.

Fast-forward a few years and a combination of hard work and determination to fight for those who are in need propelled him to attend Furman University at night with a full-time class load while working full time driving a forklift during the day. After graduating from Furman in 3 years, he attended law school at The University of South Carolina’s School of Law where he immediately excelled

and was made a member of The South Carolina Law Review. Rick has more than 20 years of experience in litigation and has tried numerous cases to verdict before both state and federal courts. He is proud to have played a part in one of the longest civil trials in the history of South Carolina which ran nearly 7 weeks in Oconee County. He has also settled thousands of cases totaling tens of millions of dollars in his career.

During all of this time, motorcycles have been the background music of his life. From his grandfather taking him on a Honda trailbike when he was 4, to his love of Evil Knievel as a kid, Rick has owned bikes from Kawasakis to Moto Guzzis to Royal Enfields to multiple BMW GSAs and more. He dreams of traveling the Pan American Highway on bike and ending up at the tip of South America in Ushuaia, Argentina.

Rick currently resides in his hometown of Greenville with his wife of 30 years and their 6 children. In addition to practicing law, he is also a church planter and pastors a non-denominational house church in Greenville. He also enjoys coaching soccer and spending time with his family. Please stop by to any of our locations and get a free VIP Rider card as well as other Swag. www.motorcyclelawgroup.com.

THE FIRM THAT RIDES!

THE NEWEST ADDITION TO THE TOM MCGRATH’S MOTORCYCLE LAW GROUP’S FAMILY!

In 1903 the first production Harley Davidson Motorcycle was produced by William S. Harley and Arthur Davidson. In 1817 came the first reference to the word tug, a name given to a small towing vessel built as a ship assistant. Most experts agree that tattoos have been around since the Bronze Age (about 2000 - 500 B.C.)

What do Harleys, tugboats and tattoos have in common? The Crowder brothers, that’s what! These five brothers have a variety of very cool tattoos they have accumulated over the years. Four of the five brothers make a living on tugboats and they only ride Harleys! Tom Crowder’s sons are hard working, fun loving guys from Tampa, Florida who represent what being a biker really means. They are all unique individuals; different in many ways, but the two main things they have in common are love of family and they all “live to ride.” It

is not unusual to find five dudes, who like to work hard, play hard and ride motorcycles, but it is unusual when they are all brothers, and four out of the five, work in the same profession. The Crowder brothers are: Edward alias The Hogster, James alias Fat Bobs, Mike alias Fat Boy, Mark and Tom.

Ron Galletti, publisher of Born To Ride had the opportunity to attend a combination Father’s Day celebration / 75th Birthday Party for dad, Tom Crowder. It was also a memorial for family friend ,a biker bro, Tom Haws who had recently passed away. Ron had been interested in doing a story on the five brothers ever since he had heard of this unique group about 12 years earlier. For the first time in 17 years all the family gathered at brother Edward’s home for this special event. The house was full of children, grandchildren, aunts, uncles and several friends of the Crowder Family;

many arriving on bikes. Before the meal, dad, a religious man, said a prayer, the way he always does, in which he asked for the blessing of his family, friends and all the soldiers protecting our country. There was enough food to feed an army or to feed five hungry biker brothers and their pals. The spread included many favorite southern dishes such as BBQ ribs, smoked chicken, pulled pork (“a pig was running around here last night until we caught him” said Edward), collard greens and a special southern corn bread recipe which includes jalapeño peppers. Makes you hungry just thinking about it, doesn’t it? There were plenty of liquid refreshments available too, even though there had been a little accident on the way to the party. A cooler filled with ice, beer and soft drinks slid off the back of a friend’s pickup (might want to put the tailgate up next time) and was

crushed by two trucks following behind…$60 worth of good beer was destroyed, not to mention the other soft drinks and a very nice cooler. All was not lost though, after another beer and soft drink run, everything was back on track and the party continued… it’s hard to get these brothers down.

Ron started his research by looking at old family photos of the brothers when they were kids and young men growing up. Then came the opportunity to talk to each of them about their lives and lifestyle choices they have made. Here is just some of what he found out about these interesting men.

Edward had his red custom Harley Chopper sitting in his yard. “I like to build and ride custom hogs,” proclaimed the Hogster. He is one of the four boatmen who make a living working on the tugs. “Working on the tugboat is what I do to live; it is kind of like being in the wind too, but my

life is motorcycles,” he declared. As far as his brothers are concerned, he had this to say, “We all fight each other and love each other, but we are still family, no matter what.” Eddie said he got his first tattoo at age thirteen and that his dad did not think it was a good thing to do. Dragons and Mermaids are his favorite designs. He had some advice for anyone thinking about getting inked, “make sure it is what you really want the first time, because it is for life!” He also declared, “I wish I had a clean canvas, I’d start all over again.”

Mark brought a 1984 and a half Evolution Soft Tail to the party which he had purchased from a friend who was having some hard times. He said “it rides real nice.” He also works on the tugboats and has for many years. Ron asked Mark if he and his brothers were angels growing up.

“Kinda angels…we tried not to give mom

and dad too hard of a time,” he said with a smile. Most of his tattoos are on his legs and are of mean faces and eyeballs. The tattoos also include a tribute to the late Indian Larry and a Mountain Dew can.

Mark commented that “tattoos don’t mean you’re evil like some people think, they are just cool.” His advice to everyone is “live everyday like it is your last and don’t sweat the small things.”

Tony, the third born brought his black and red ‘07 Road Glide. He told Ron that it is the best bike he has ever had. Tony now lives in Georgia and is a member of the CMA (Christian Motorcycle Association). He was president of the chapter in Way Cross, Georgia for four years. When talking to Tony, it is easy to see that he is a very religious man. Tony said that when he became a Christian he had several of his tattoos reworked; “from ugly to eagles,”

was how he put it. “My brothers paid for my first tattoo when I was in my thirties which was a rebel flag and skull,” Tony remembered. “Now I wish I never had them,” he said regretfully. Ron asked Tony what was most important to him now and he responded without even having to think. “Family is the most important thing in my life, next to Jesus Christ, it’s the best thing that ever happened to me,” said Tony. He proudly introduced Ron to his wife and two children who were with him at the gathering. James and Tony’s wives actually planned the reunion.

Mike, nicknamed Fat Boy, is the second born brother and was riding a 100th Anniversary Fat Boy. “It’s a cammed–out Screaming Eagle,” as he put it. “It will smoke’em for a block and a half,” says Mike. Ron wanted to know how important riding was to Mike. “You know riding is important when you have to change the back tire every five thousand miles,” he laughed. He is the only one of the five who has never worked on the tugboats. Mike is in the drilling business. “We are five brothers together and we take care of each other!” he proudly boasts. When Ron asked

Mike if there was anything else he wanted to say. He replied “Just watch out for the DA (dumb ass in a cage) who is talking on a cell phone and running a red light or doing something stupid that kills a biker!” And he added one more thing , “one or two beers are ok, but after that forget getting on your bike.”

James, also known as Fat Bobs is the oldest son and he came on his ’04 Road Glide, which he calls his traveling machine. James’s wife rides a ’07 Street Glide and he says it is lots of fun traveling around with her. He has been working on the

tugboats for thirty six years and says that “sometimes it is so calm that it feels like being on a cruise and it’s a good feeling out there looking up at the stars.” James got his first tattoo in 1979. “The tattoos are part of who I am and they tell a story,” said Fat Bobs. He has some Harley tattoos, but he really likes getting Japanese art and water creatures for his designs. James used to ride with the Black Fender Gang, but now has had those tattoos covered with other art. He really enjoyed getting together with the rest of the family and

said “I hope we can be doing this on dad’s 100th birthday.”

With kids running around the yard having fun like kids love to do, and bikers standing around telling stories, eating good food and partying like bikers love to do, the festivities continued on all day. As things were winding down, Ron asked Tom Crowder for his final thoughts on the day and having all five sons together. Tom said “I have six sons, the five blood brothers and one step son, Skip, who was not able to be here today.” Mike spoke up and said, “yea

we’ve known him since he was about six inches long.” Dad also said, “It’s really nice to get them all together with everyone, but it will be better tomorrow if I can get them all in church.”

As the sun was getting low in the sky, the brothers posed for photos with dad and their bikes. Then they did what they had been waiting to do all day and love to do most. They fired up their Harleys and hit the road, because they truly are five brothers born to ride.

-Ron Hawks

ARE YOU BORN TO RIDE?

THE LIFE & TIMES OF MOTORCYCLES

MOTORCYCLES & THE PEOPLE WHO RIDE THEM

FALL RIDE GUIDE TO TENNESSEE

As the weather starts to turn over the next few weeks here in east Tennessee, it’s time for the days to get cooler. Time for the leaves to create their brilliant mosaic display of color. Time to catch the primal wisp of campfire smoke making its way in our path. Time to take in the freshly cut fields of hay drying and enjoying everything pumpkin spice of fall.

It’s a special time of year in this part of the Appalachian Mountains as millions of riders, drivers and tourists flock to the region. With good cause-the Great Smokey Mountain National Park is the most visited park in the country. Last year’s estimate, 2022, was over 12 million people.

The greater Smokey Mountain region is a simple day ride from Georgia, North Carolina and Kentucky. In fact, aside from those riding Sporty’s, sorry I couldn’t help it, a tank of gas will get you here easy.

In this edition of our fall ride guide, we’ll take a look at two of the best roads that offer both technical challenges and easy sweeping turns at elevation; The Tail of the Dragon and the Cherohala Skyway.

Regardless of what end of this loop you start at, Tellico Plains, or Dragon City, both in Tennessee, you’re in for a treat.

Dragon City, at the junction of US129 and TN72 is the gateway to The Tail of The Dragon. Dragon City offers an incredible full menu for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It also has 14 newly renovated rooms named after some of the curves on the 318 in 11 (The Dragon) that are a gearheads paradise with diamond plate backsplashes, rustic iron gear hangers, Queen size beds, plush robes and all the comforts after a day of riding. With over half of The Dragon being in Tennessee, you can belly up to the dinner bar and lose count of the bikes and cars that roll by. While there, be sure to get a photo-op with their new fiery eyed smoke breathing Dragon-Octane.

Leaving Dragon City and heading south on US129 to tame the tail, 318 curves later you’ll be at the junction of US129 and NC28. Staying on US129 you’ll snake along the river towards Robbinsville,

NC. Just before Robbinsville proper you’ll hook east on NC143 (the NC side of The Cherohala Skyway).

The Cherohala Skyway, unlike The Dragon, is the part of this loop where you can put your feet up on the pegs, mostly, and cruise all the while easing your way up to an elevation of 5k feet. Yes, it’s refreshing at the top and a pleasant break from the 90-degree heat below. Take advantage of the pull-offs near the top not only for the scenic views, but also to see the flying squirrel “fly bridges” that accommodate their aerial travel. Although this is a more kicked back ride be sure to pay attention as some of the curves tighten up quickly.

After an easy, and just as beautiful as the climb, descent you’ll pass Cherohala HarleyDavidson and will bottom out in Tellico Plains, TN. Lots of great places to get gas, ample cottage and campground accommodations and places to eat with my favorite being the Telli-Cafe. It’s that small town family-owned business that serves up great hearty food. Rich, its owner for 30 years, has something great going on. Be sure to stop in and say hi.

Once in Tellico Plains, you can head north and loop back over to Dragon City, or head south for a longer day of more incredible riding.

We’ll cover the south end of this trip next month in our next issue of the Fall Ride Guide. Meanwhile, be sure to check our Dragon City and the Telli-Cafe!

- Indian Rider Bill

Fuel Tank Rusty? Craig Can Fix It!

The heart and soul of your bike is the fuel tank. Originally, the tank was new and clean, but over the years that all has changed. If you are tired of cleaning carburetors or think you need a new tank because yours is too rusty or it leaks, I have the solution. We clean tanks and preserve the metal – even permanently stop leaks! The highgrade epoxy coating we use is second to none; we can even remove most Kreem and Red-Kote liners. We have a fast turnaround time; it’s the easiest thing you’ll do all week. Call 813-407-2226 or CraigPaintsBikes.com

PUTTING PEDOPHILES ON NOTICE

Welcome to September. Not to blurt out the obvious, but damn, it’s hot as balls out there. Seems that August was international bonfire month with all the fires going on. Obviously, this affects us all one way or another. They have Smokey the bear working overtime. Speaking of fires and things that get me hot and overheated, I’m bringing up a topic I absolutely despise. Before I go on my rant, I first want to state that this article is my opinion and my opinion only. I’m not speaking on anyone else’s behalf but stating what goes through my mind and my mind only. Take it as venting out what stays bottled up inside to your therapist. No threats but projections of what one may wish we were allowed to do but is prevented by law. I’m not condoning anyone taking this article for anything more than the rants of an American living in these times. There’s my disclaimer. Enjoy.

All pedophiles should be treated with the equal respect they show their victims before they are publicly executed. As it is said, do unto others that you would want done to you, correct? I don’t feel it’s a person that has a disease but a society that has allowed this to take place unchecked. I’m not saying the perpetrators aren’t sick, twisted, grotesque, lower than dog sh*t scum that should be exploring the bottom of the Everglades type of individuals. They are. I for one don’t support the idea of funding a proven guilty without a shadow of a doubt pedophile being

kept behind bars for the rest of his life when public execution is far more cost effective. I know there are some of the readers reading this going, “Oh, it’s not right to take someone’s life, I support the death penalty.” For those people, and hopefully it never happens to you or your loved ones, let us know your view after one of these pieces of social garbage targets you or your children. A past case comes to mind. Look it up. Leon Gary Plauché was a Father known for publicly killing Jeff Doucet, who had kidnapped, raped and molested Plauché’s son, Jody.

system for enacting what I’ll call “real justice.” Not to mention the victim having to relive the whole event in a public court system. Again, more drama. Fix the laws.

This isn’t isolated to someone else’s family or in someone else’s town. We have it right here locally as well. Although the circumstances and details may differ, it doesn’t change the horrific acts the “accused” is charged with.

This is in our own biker community by someone very familiar to others around here. The news reports that he was part of a club, but in all actuality, he was a bike show events promoter. Check your news for details. So far, evidence shows two children assaulted grotesquely with potentially more victims.

Makes me sick to my stomach and brings out the worst side of me.

The killing occurred by use of a revolver on March 16, 1984, and was captured on camera by a local news crew. Was this the wrong type of justice?

I personally don’t believe so. One of the sad parts of this happening, after the life long suffering a child and their family go through, they drag an already traumatized family through the court

Between the pedophiles and the human traffickers that help supply victims, every one of you should be beyond outraged. I know I am. I have to cut this short before I go too far. I’ll close with this. To all of you pedophiles. You are on notice. You will be found because Justice will eventually find you. I just hope it’s before someone else becomes your victim. People, stay strong, stay vigilante.

Nefarious James American Patriot

“As it is said, do unto others that you would want done to you, correct?”

Hey there, my BTR friends. It’s August in Florida and for Mike and I that means we spend a lot of time at the beach, in the pool or shopping during the day. Nighttime is the best time to ride. There are not as many people on the roads and the breeze is actually cool. He does complain about the bugs between his teeth though. I tell him that it’s just protein and you should make more stops at watering holes to wash them down.

Speaking of stopping, I got a letter in the mail addressed to me from the local Walmart manager. I opened it and found out that he’s been up to no good on many occasions. When we go there, I’m not allowed inside so I hang out in the shopping cart area letting all the people passing by take pictures, selfies, and scratch my head. So, this is all news to me and explains why Mike was escorted out of Walmart the last time we were there. Now I’ll share with you my friends, the letter.

Miss Spyke Mularz,

Over the past three months, your owner has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced by our policies to throw him off the property and ban both of you from all Walmart locations. Our complaints against Mike Mularz are listed below and have been documented by our video surveillance cameras:

1. May 15: He took 20 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2. June 2: Mike set all the alarm clocks in the houseware department to go off at 5-minute intervals.

THE LETTER FROM WALMART

3. June 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.

4. June 19: Your owner walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, “Code 3 in the furniture department. Get on it right away.” This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her supervisor that in turn resulted in a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don’t have a Code 3.

5. June 22: Mike went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of Butterfingers on layaway.

6. June 27: He moved several ‘CAUTIONWET FLOOR’ signs to a dry carpeted area.

7. June 30: Mike set up a tent in the camping department and told children he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which ten obliged.

8. July 2: When two clerks asked if they could help him, he jumped in a cart, began crying and screamed, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?” EMTs were called. He ran off before they arrived.

9. July 6: Mr. Mularz looked right into a security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. July 10: While Mike was handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. July 15: He darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ‘Mission Impossible’ theme.

12. July 17: Mike was in the auto department practicing his ‘Madonna Look’ using different sized funnels.

13. July 19: Mr. Mularz hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, he yelled, “PICK ME! PICK ME!” This caused an elderly lady to urinate herself.

14. July 22: When an announcement came over the loudspeaker, Mike assumed the fetal position and screamed at the top of his lungs; “OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!”

15. July 26: He took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

16. July 30: Your owner went into a fitting room, shut the door, and waited quietly. After about ten minutes, he farted profusely and yelled loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.” Two customers ran out screaming and one clerk passed out!

The local authorities have been advised and will act accordingly. Please do not underestimate the severity of this matter and take control of your human.

Thank you for your understanding, store manager, Don T. Meswidme.

I hand Mike the letter and he reads it. He then says to me, “Oh little buddy, I’m so sorry to get you involved. I was just trying to have some fun and pass the time inside an air-conditioned building. Speaking of time, I think we both deserve a little wind time. I need to get your awings in the wind, my knees under the keys, and the Fat Bird 3 wheels rolling down the road. There’s a new Target that just opened on the other side of town!”

CHRISTIAN MOTORCYCLISTS ASSOCIATION

WHAT IS A BIKE BLESSINGS?

Imagine you hear about a biker event happening on the other side of town. The forecast anticipates perfect weather so, you invite your closest friends for a group ride out to the event. You all are enticed knowing there will be live music, food trucks, and tables full of motorcycle gear and other items for sale waiting for you all to enjoy. The day of the event arrives, and the riding weather was perfect, as predicted. At the venue, a couple of bikers from the Christian Motorcyclist Association (CMA) greet you and ask if they could bless you and your friend’s bikes. You have heard the term “bike blessing” before but you ask yourself, “what are these bike blessings and why are they offered?”

You learn that a bike blessing is an opportunity for the CMA to show how much they care for everyone in the biker community. The CMA truly finds it a privilege, when welcomed, to pray for the safety of a biker’s riding season and any other particular needs the biker wants prayer for. You listen to stories of how God has moved in the lives of bikers and how proclaiming the name of Jesus has truly resulted in miracles in people’s lives. You’re reminded that although riding

safety is imperative, it is more important that our lives be in a right relationship with Jesus and that when we pray, we should have a feeling of expectation because God hears our prayers.

At this point, you and your friends are moved. You all accept the bike blessings and a prayer for safety, blessing, and direction from the Spirit of God in your lives. Some of you even ask for individual prayer before continuing your plans to enjoy the beautiful day and event.

Teach’s Takeaway:

- A bike blessing is a prayer for safety, blessing, and any needs we may have.

- The most important thing is that our lives be in a right relationship with Jesus.

- Today is always a good day to pray.

You are finally headed home, thankful for a perfect ride, a wonderful event, and your first bike blessing. Please receive this blessing as well. “The Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you. The Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26). Ride on.

Fellow Soldier in Christ, Wayne (Teach) Masiker

Christian Motorcyclists Association

wayne.masiker@att.net