Calgary Stampede Survival Guide 2016

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Stampede Sur vival Guide It’s time for the city’s favourite 10-day stint of debauchery otherwise known as The Calgary Stampede

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Mon-Sat 9am - 6pm

We Will Be Back To Our Regular Hours

July 18th

Mon-Fri 9am - 9pm Sat 9am - 6pm Sun 11am - 4pm

STAMPEDE HOURS Until July 17th

Quality • Fit • Selection • Service

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LIST Game Plan Like any good soldier going into battle you need to have a conscious plan of attack. This Stampede, make sure you’ve got the Car2Go app to make getting around and parking easier, the Find My iPhone app for those slippery evenings at Cowboys, and of course the stmpdr mobile site feed up on your home screen to get the latest and greatest news on the best pancake breakfasts, loudest concerts, wildest tents, and the hottest spots to be.

Sweet Western Outfit Tassels, fringe, turquoise, and flashy western wear are not just welcome, they’re encouraged. Having a great outfit will make you stand out from the crowd, make you easy to spot if you lose your people, and can be a fantastic conversation starter.

Stampede Emergency Kit Swap out those Band-Aids and gauze for water, some extra strength Advil, condoms, Wet Ones, and some Tums to contend with the deep fried snacks that you’ll find throughout the grounds. This is a great way to make friends.

Tolerance There are some things money can’t buy and this is one of them. Like training your body for a marathon, you should probably be hitting the patios throughout June in order to acquire a strong constitution for shooting Jack Daniels, drinking beer in the heat of the day, and handling white wine spritzers like a pro. If you are feeling unprepared – stay hydrated. We recommend a two-to-one strategy. Water, Jack Daniels, more water.

Phone Charger Chances are you won’t be spending much time at home or at the office.

Make sure you’re packing a charger to avoid those oh-so-painful situations of carrying around a dead cell phone and missing out on capturing a good time – or worst of all, losing your friends. In an attempt to cater to cell phone users, more and more events have charging stations so it shouldn’t be hard to find a place to plug in.

Be in the Know Stay up to speed by following @datenightyyc, @stmpdr, and @brandedmag.

all photos courtesy of The Calgary Stampede Archives

Chuck by the numbers Here are some facts about the one of the most exciting events in the Stampede:

629

the number of horses in total that competed in the 2015 derby

2763

the age range of the drivers competing at the 2016 GMC Rangeland Derby

43

the average age of the drivers competing in 2016

435

the combined years of racing experience among the 36 drivers who will be competing in 2016

500700

the number of chuckwagon horses that come to Stampede Park for the GMC Rangeland Derby each year

Being A Rodeo Clown Is Hard Work, And That’s No Bull. words by Caitlin Best

Contrary to popular belief, being a rodeo clown is no joke. While the face paint, wig, and mismatched plaid overalls might throw you off, rodeo clowns were introduced to bull riding as a means to protect thrown riders from being trampled or maimed.

where students learn the art of face paint, comedy routines, and two stepping with bovines.

In honour of this misunderstood profession, we thought we’d go over some of the quintessential skills required to be a rodeo clown. Here are a few things that you might find on their CV.

A former member of the varsity track team When you have a bull charging you, it’s generally considered a good thing to be physically fit. To stay in one piece you’ll need to be quick on your feet, capable of jumping out of the way, and taking the odd hit. This is real tough guy stuff. Think Die Hard with a bolo tie.

Good with people, better with animals When you’re put in a ring with 2,000 pounds of raw fury – that will far exceed your worst day in anger management training – you should probably have some understanding of how bulls work. Waving red in their face won’t do much. Many rodeo clowns are former rodeo stars who’ve spent years working alongside these giants.

A dedicated and hardworking employee who received specialized training Further to point one, this isn’t a profession you just walk into. It actually takes special training, and prior rodeo circuit experience is preferred. Many rodeo clowns attend rodeo clown school (YES such a thing exists)

Someone who works well under pressure This should be self-explanatory.

Someone who has an engaging personality Besides risking your neck, you’re also supposed to be funny, like really funny. If the crowd isn’t entertained, you won’t last long.

This is Russell Peters meets Roman gladiator kind of expectations.

Someone who excels at multi-tasking Think of it this way; working as a rodeo clown is like being an account manager where your clients depend on you in life and death situations, tensions run high all the time, and there’s no such thing as having an ‘off’ day.

WELL, HOW THIRSTY ARE YA

NEW

Sip on our signature Stampede Inspired Cocktail List featuring Alberta’s own Eau Claire Distillery’s Spirits.

BBQ’s on the patio!

Saturday, July 9 & 16 | 12 to 3 p.m.

Eau Claire Distillery Spirits Tasting BBQ Plate featuring Beef Ribs, Smoked Bison Brisket, Free Range Chicken Wings + more 1 Stampede Inspired Cocktail $25 a person Enter to win tickets to the GMC Rangeland Derby at the BBQ’s! # barcstampede

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Where To Go Knoxville’s Tavern

Cowboys Dancehall and Tent

Dubbing themselves, “The bar your mother warned you about,” we have a feeling this venue will be the perfect destination for your Stampede shenanigans. Looking to get Stampede started a little early? Check out its Stampede kick-off pancake breakfast on July 8th.

All year round, Cowboys is a popular spot with its convenient location next to the Dome, and the 10 days of Stampede are definitely no exception. Cue the 10,000 person pop-up tent and world-class music acts on stage. This year, expect to see the likes of Blink-182, Blue Rodeo, Thomas Rhett, Flo Rida, and Ice Cube.

The Wildhorse Saloon

Nashville North

Located in the heart of downtown, your Stampede adventure wouldn’t be complete without a trip to Wildhorse. Daily concerts, tasty western barbecue, and a dance floor for endless two-steppin’ – what more could you need? To top it all off, Wildhorse has seven different bars, meaning your glass will always be more than half full. We’re optimists like that.

Despite the long lines and funky smell that tends to develop as the week goes on, Nashville North remains one of the most sought after bars for those magical 10 days.

With its convenient location right off the Midway, it’s the perfect place to complete a day of fun. The sticky ground is just simply part of the charm.

Ranchman’s Cookhouse & Dancehall

The Coca-Cola Stage

If you happen to find yourself in the south, head to Ranchman’s. It’s got plenty of events and activities to ensure you make the most of those 10 special days. Make sure to check out the Cowboys vs. Firefighters charity pole climb or the 17th Annual Invitational PBR Bullbustin’.

It also has great limo deals, so you and your friends can start your day at Ranchman’s and then cruise to the grounds in style.

The Coca-Cola stage provides an opportunity to see some amazing acts free with entry to the Stampede grounds. But, fair warning – unless you plan on waiting hours before the set time, you probably won’t be front row. Fortunately this outdoor stage remains in great ear and view shot from just about anywhere near the BMO Centre. The main acts start just after 9pm, but entertainment including the annual hypnotist and talent searches, is on all day long.

Patios to Roast on

Cactus Club + Local 510 + Wurst + National (all locations) + Ship & Anchor

BECAUSE YOU CAN’T SURVIVE ON JUST

PANCAKES

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photos by Shane Arsenault

Daily To-Do’s

Sneak-a-Peek

Thurs

7

Christian Hudson, Coca-Cola Stage, 7 p.m.

JJ Shiplett, Coca-Cola Stage, 8 p.m.

Tim Hicks, Nashville North, 8 p.m.

Fri

The Dudes, Coca-Cola Stage, 9:15 p.m.

8

Eau Claire Distillery Tasting at Bar C, 5-7 p.m.

Walk Off the Earth, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Sat

9

High Valley, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

BBQ on the patio at Bar C, 12 p.m.-3 p.m.

Coleman Hell, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

West Mack, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

Sun

10

Blink-182, Cowboys Stampede Tent, 6 p.m.

Classified, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Mon

11

Aaron Pritchett, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

Milky Chance, Wildhorse Saloon, 6 p.m.

Blue Rodeo, Cowboys Stampede Tent, 7 p.m.

X Ambassadors, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Tebey, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

Tues

John Conlee, Nashville North, 12:30 p.m., 3 p.m.

Eau Claire Distillery Tasting at Bar C, 5p.m.-7 p.m.

Reuben and the Dark, Wildhorse Saloon, 6 p.m.

Thomas Rhett and Brett Kissel, Cowboys Stampede Tent, 7 p.m.

The Sheepdogs, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Deric Ruttan, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

12

Wed

13

MINAS’ Annual Stampede Breakfast (with a Brazilian flare), 9 a.m.-11 a.m.

BC/DC, Wildhorse Saloon, 7 p.m.

Jocelyn Alice, Coca-Cola Stage, 8 p.m.

Shawn Hook, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Thurs

14

Eau Claire Distillery Tasting at Bar C, 5 p.m.-7 p.m.

Zac Brown Band, Saddledome, 7:30 p.m.

Blackjack Billy, Wildhorse Saloon, 7 p.m.

Mother Mother, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Fri

15

Kentucky Headhunters, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

Lady Antebellum, Saddledome, 7:30 p.m.

Dear Rouge, Coca-Cola Stage, 8 p.m.

The Glorious Sons, Coca-Cola Stage, 9:30 p.m.

Washboard Union, Nashville North, 10 p.m.

Sat

BBQ on the patio at Bar C,12 p.m.-3 p.m.

Gord Bamford, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

Jojo Mason, Nashville North, 9 p.m.

Sun

17

Madeline Merlo, Nashville North, 10:30 p.m.

Jeff Dunham, Saddledome, 7:30 p.m.

Ice Cube & Flo Rida, Cowboys Stampede Tent, 6 p.m.

Simple Plan, Coca-Cola Stage, 9 p.m.

The Nashville North All Star Band hosted by Jason Greeley, Nashville North, 9 p.m., 10:30 p.m.

16

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My Diet Is Ruined At the Midway it’s really easy to get weird and wild with food, this year is no different. Check out the creations that innovative food enthusiasts have cooked up for us.

Oreo Churros

PB Dumbbells

Of all the ways to eat our favourite cookie, this is #1. Crispy chocolate churros made with real Oreo cookie pieces and a cream centre.

Gooey peanut butter balls wrapped and deep fried in corn bread batter, topped with chocolate sauce and crispy bacon bits.

Deep Fried Tequila Shot Bites

Nutella Honey Glazed Doughnuts

Non-alcoholic tequila-flavoured cake bites topped with icing sugar. Tequila without the hangover? We’ll take five.

Doughnuts and Nutella on an easy-to-carry stick – definitely sounds like our kind of take out.

Big Pickle Dog

Waffle Cone

A hotdog in a pickle in cornbread – a truly impressive culinary feat.

The Yummy Tommy Waffle Cone is a rich and warm Hong Kong style egg waffle. Top this puppy off with your choice of five different kinds of hard ice cream, strawberries, sweet candies, and chocolate Pocky.

Salted Caramel Deep Fried Coffee

Golden Grasshopper Pie Pop

Skip your morning cup of joe and grab your coffee fix in a delicious, alternative way: deep fried and topped with caramel and Himalayan sea salt. Choose from five different flavours and keep your caffeine buzz going all day long.

A chocolate dipped popsicle with a crème de menthe base, a chocolate cookie inside, edible gold flakes, oh, and we can’t forget the crickets throughout. This take on the classic grasshopper pie will have any daring diners drooling.

Saturday Morning Beaver Balls

Mac and Cheese Stuffed Burger

Golden deep fried dough balls topped with cinnamon and sugar, add some Fruit Loop cereal, raspberries, and a splash of condensed milk and voilà! A well-balanced Stampede breaky.

A dish straight out of our dreams, a combination of two of our all-time favourite foods: homemade burger patties with all the toppings, and creamy mac and cheese.

Fruit Infused Grilled Cheese

Deep Fried Butter Tart

Infused with blueberry, strawberry, and kiwi, this treat is an intriguing twist on a classic comfort food.

This battered and deep fried tart is taken to another level with toppings of whipped cream and caramel drizzle.

RODEO READY! Great hair days every day

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Beauty products delivered to your door.

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Shop Coast to Coast 100 Locations and Growing

www.chatters.ca Gift with Colour Service: One per person. While supplies last. Beauty Bonus: Before Taxes. Valid with in-store or online retail purchase only. Limit one per person, per day. While supplies last. Final Sale. No Refunds or Exchanges.

HANG

OVERS

A bad Stampede hangover begins with that terrible cotton ball mouth, a twisted stomach, and utter confusion as to why you slept with your cowboy boots on. This is just the beginning. From there, you’re left to put the pieces of your night back together, or do that walk of shame back home – during which you’ll question your poor life choices.

While the obvious way to avoid this terrible moment is to add water in between each drink or to cut yourself off early, we all know this probably isn’t going to happen. So here are a few things that will make the morning after a little more pleasant.

Carbohydrates

Tiger Balm

To get your system working again, you need to rehydrate and replenish your nutrients. If your stomach is still doing somersaults, then start with something simple and filling. While crackers are always a safe option, honey sandwiches or a pancake breakfast are highly recommended as the first meal of the day.

The pounding headache can be the worst part of a hangover. If the painkillers aren’t doing the trick then pick up a bottle of Tiger Balm and rub a small amount on your temples. The soothing and cooling effects of the herbs in this balm will bring you temporary bliss.

Grease

Anything Fizzy

If you’re able to handle a bit more than toast, then head to your favourite morning haunt or pancake breakfast to load up on grease.

Runny eggs, hash browns, and thick cut bacon are the nectar of the Stampede gods.

If you wash this down with orange juice you should be on the mend in no time.

Alka Selzer, ENO, or good old-fashioned Coca-Cola will do the trick. The bubbles will settle your stomach, the liquid will help the rehydration process, and the caffeine that comes in many soda pops will give you a gentle jolt to get moving.

Dirty Lemonade

Hair of the Dog

Dirty Lemonade, crafted with organic lemon, activated charcoal, bentonite clay, and zeolite will clean you right up and let you jump back on that horse before you know it. The clays and charcoal are known to re-mineralize your body, balance your pH levels, cleanse your liver, and eliminate toxins. Cutting to the chase, it’s the ultimate hangover cure and a Stampede 2016 essential. We suggest stocking your fridge. Visit crujuice.com for store locations and local distributors.

When in doubt, drink it out. A spicy Caesar, Baileys and coffee, or orange juice spiked with vodka are the cocktails of choice to get you back in the party mood.

What’s your secret? Spread the word and good karma will come your way.

Wild Facts About Bull Riding

The 2016 Calgary Stampede is the only rodeo in the world that will match the reigning World Champion Bull Rider in the PBR against the PRCA World Champion. JB Mauney (PBR) will be competing this year as will Sage Kimzey (PRCA).

At eight seconds a ride, the average bucking bull will work less than two minutes in a year.

Most bulls that compete today are fifth or sixth generation bucking bulls.

The average bull rider weighs 150 lbs.

The average bucking bull can weigh in at as much as 2,000 pounds.

Top bucking bulls are worth upwards of $100,000.

Two time Calgary Stampede Bull Riding Champion JB Mauney is the highest money earning bull rider of all time. At just 29 years old, he has earned nearly $7 million.

Contrary to some beliefs, the flank strap makes no contact with a bull’s “nether region” - but rather its hip area. Almost all rodeo bulls will stop bucking once the cowboy comes off.

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“WHAT SHOULD WE DO TONIGHT?”

Style Food Entertainment Culture Celebrate the Calgary Stampede with stories and news from a collective of yyc creatives, cowboys & wild spirits that are exploring everything Stampede. ď‚‚ ď…­ spiritofstampede

spiritofstampede.com