Muslim Voice January 2014 issue

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Muslim Voice ARIZONA

january 2014

safar / rabi al awal

Monthly Newspaper

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US Muslim Children Harassed in Schools SAN DIEGO – A leading US Muslim advocacy group has released a new study showing that a high number of Muslim students in the US western state of California fall victims of bullying from classmates, teachers and administrators. “I was bullied when I was in middle school,” Hanif Mohebi of the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) was quoted by ABC 10 News on Thursday, December 19. “We were called terrorists, we were called at the time Saddam Hussein,” he added. The new report was released by the California chapter of the Continued on page

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Influence of Israel lobby declining

Vol.18 Issue No.210

Syria Children

Breadwinners in Refuge Miles away from home, Syrian young children have turned to be breadwinners for their families in refuge. “At the beginning, I got tired of the responsibilities,” Omar al-Kurdi, a 17-year-old Syrian refugee in Lebanon, told Wall Street Journal. “I was comfortable in Syria. Here I have to worry all the time. But I’m used to it now, what choice do I have?” How to Help Oppressed Syrians Take Action for Syria (Active Tips) Syrian Refugees in a Race Against Winter(Video) Misery of Syrian Refugees (Watch) The Plight of Syrian Refugees (Help Now) In Syria, Omar was a good kid who got top grades, helped his disabled father manage a small shop

selling cigarettes and snacks and hung laundry for his mother. As a refugee in Lebanon, Omar became the family’s breadwinner, working 14 hours a day in a vegetable shop. Sacrificing a promising future in pursuing a degree in physical therapy after finishing ninth grade, his last formal schooling, he now works in a vegetable shop where his salary of $15 a day pays for rent and food. “Before the war, I was a happy kid,” he said, hanging a bunch of bananas on a hook at the shop located in Beirut’s working-class neighborhood of Borj Hamoud. Syrians usually stop by the vegetable shop every day to ask for work; nearly all of them, Omar’s boss said, boys Continued on page younger than 17.

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By Norman Birnbaum Despite insistent protests by Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, supported by both Democrats and Republicans in Congress, US President Barack Obama and his government are persisting in negotiations with Iran. Obama has the backing of a US majority unwilling to start another war in the Near East - and has at least half the American Jewish public behind him. That is a severe blow to the claims of the leaders of most American Jewish organizations that they represent a community united in Continued on page

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january 2014

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Terms used in this paper Alhamdulilah: Praise God Allah: Arabic word for God Fatwa: Islamic decision based on Shari’a Hadith: Sayings of the Prophet Mohammad Hajj: Pilgrimage to Mecca Halal: Allowed in Islam Halaqa: Group study Haram: Prohibited in Islam Hijab: Head cover for women Hijra: Migration of the Prophet from Mecca to Madina Imam: Islamic scholar Iman: Faith Inshallah: God willing Madina: City near Mecca in Saudia Arabia Masjid: Place were Muslims gather for prayer and studies Mecca: City in Saudi Arabia where Prophet Mohammad was born Pbuh: Peace be upon him Quran: Islam’s Holy book Shahadah: Is saying “I accept Allah as the one God and Mohammad as his messenger” when someone accepts Islam. Sharia’: Islamic law Shura: A council of Muslim scholars (SWT) Subhanahu Watala: Praise be to Allah Taqwa: God consciousness

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Islam Finds Home Among Latino Americans HOUSTON – For Jaime Fletcher, an American of Colombian origin, Islam came to him at a much unexpected moment in his life. “One night that I was with a friend of mine who I’d grown up with, after leaving a club and drinking, we were sitting outside of his house. He looked at the liquor that he had in his hands and he said, ‘I can’t believe I’m still doing this,’” Fletcher, the then gang member who drink, chase women and drive fast cars, told Public Radio International (PRI) on Monday, December 23. “And I said, ‘Why?’ And he said, ‘I can’t believe I’m still doing this after having gone to Makkah.’ And I asked him, ‘What is Makkah?’ And he said, ‘It’s where the house of God is.’ “And that was strange for me. He said, ‘Islam is the true religion of God.’ And I said, ‘Well everybody says their religion is the truth,’” he added. This short conversation between Fletcher and his friend was the spark that encouraged him to search for the true religion. Like most Latinos, Fletcher was raised in a Catholic family, but he says his parents also encouraged him to find his own truth. In his quest for the truth, he studied Christianity, Judaism, Taoism and Buddhism, coming to a belief that Islam was the true religion of God. That’s when he decided to revert to Islam to go by the name Mujahid Fletcher, getting rid of one of the biggest disadvantages he had with Catholicism: confession to a priest. “Islam brings about a clear sense of asking for forgiveness or repentance directly to God, without having an intermediary,” Fletcher says. The same reason was cited by many Muslim reverts,

according to Katherine Ewing, a professor of religion at Columbia University. “There are frustrations with the structure of the Catholic Church, the hierarchy. A number [of

Catholics] say that they’re kind of bored with the mass, that it doesn’t seem related to their everyday needs,” she adds. Ewing says Islam and Protestantism are addressing those voids for many Latino Catholics. Yet, many Latinos were pulled towards Islam following 9/11 attacks, in a bid to know more about this faith. “Maybe they saw it [Islam] as this terrorist organization and wanted to find out more about why Muslims would become terrorists,” Ewing said. “They started to do Internet research, or to read the Koran to find out if it really advocated violence. And many, as they did that, actually saw Islam as a peaceful religion, as something that had more familiarity than they expected. They also found some of the beauty of the tradition as they explored further.” Growing Community Finding Islam, Mujahid Fletcher wanted other Latinos to find this too. Therefore, he launched a

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company called Islam in Spanish in which he began doing translations and making audio recordings of the verses. He and his father, who also converted to Islam, have recorded more than 500 CDs and 200 cable access TV shows about Islam. “The end goal with Islam in Spanish is to educate Latinos about Islam worldwide,” he said. Now, Fletcher attends the Maryam Islamic Center in Sugar Land, an affluent suburb of Houston. The large mosque looked like something you’d find in the Middle East or Turkey — an attractive building with high, arched entrances, pillars and two minarets. Fletcher says Latino Muslims are spread out in small pockets in big cities like Houston. Thirty minutes away from Fletcher’s mosque, Daniel Abdullah Hernandez, a Puerto Rican-American who was raised Catholic, works as an imam at a mosque in the city of Pearland. Hernandez, also a gang member, said Islam helped turn him into a

responsible husband and father. “In the beginning, people think it’s a phase. My mother, after two years of seeing my transformation, she became a Muslim,” Hernandez said. His father and brother converted as well. Together, the family visited Egypt to study Islam, a trip that cleared up any doubts they had about becoming Latino Muslims. “Me and my family were feeling that we were going to be lonely during the holidays,” he says. “And that first year, we’re sitting with other Hispanics breaking bread and eating, and we were all amazed.” It’s difficult to estimate how many Latinos in the US have converted to Islam. Ewing puts the figure somewhere between 50,000 and 100,000. The 2011 US Mosque Survey, which interviewed leaders at 524 mosques across the country, found the number of new female converts to Islam had increased 8 percent since 2000. Of that number, Latinos accounted for 12 percent of all new converts in the United States in 2011.

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National/opinion

january 2014

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US Muslim Children Harassed in Schools

Council on American-Islamic Relations on Thursday. The new report, “Growing in Faith: California Muslim Youth Experiences with Bullying, Harassment and Religious Accommodation in Schools,” is based on a statewide survey of almost 500 Muslim students, ages 11 to 18. They were asked questions about their relationships with peers and teachers, as well as their comfort levels participating in discussions about Islam and Muslims. The study found one in five female students were harassed because they wore hijabs or Islamic headscarves. “Questions like, ‘Are you a terrorist?’” said 16-year-old Salma Hassane, who was interviewed for the study. Salma, who attends La Jolla High School, said sometimes her classmates and teachers just don’t understand. “’Do you wear the scarf in the shower?’ Do you take it off at home?’” Salma said she has been asked. Salma’s father said he was insulted when someone said, “Your cousin

was killed,” when referring to Osama bin Laden’s death.

CAIR said it administrators

hopes and

school law

The survey said those type of comments have made one in five Muslim students uncomfortable to speak during class. Disturbing Most disturbing, the reported harassment also came from teachers and administrators.

enforcement would use the firstof-its-kind report as an educational tool for teachers and students. Salma said she hopes the numbers will decrease, with the study to back them up. “It’s not only us trying to make the effort, but it’s also them trying to

incorporate us and trying to make us feel more comfortable,” said Salma. The report also shares anecdotes from CAIR-CA’s case files to highlight the problems reported to the civil rights organization’s offices and includes information about recent changes to the law because of high-profile cases of extreme school bullying. Additionally, the report provides information for parents about how to request religious accommodation for their child and a list of resources that parents can use to learn more about the issues children face at school. Though there are no official estimates, the US is home to an estimated Muslim minority of six to eight million. An earlier Gallup poll found that the majority of Americans Muslims are loyal to their country and optimistic about their future in the United States. Another US survey has revealed that the majority of Americans know very little about Muslims and their faith.

Continued from p. 1

Influence of Israel lobby declining in US, opening new possibilities

unequivocal solidarity with Israel. It is also a rebuke to those in Israel who define Jewishness as requiring that solidarity. In fact, some of the most faithful allies of the Israeli government are in the 20 percent of Americans who adhere to Protestant Biblical literalism. They think that the foundation of the state of Israel is evidence for the imminence of the end of the world and God’s final judgment - in which most Jews will perish but a selected group will elect Christianity. They are joined by those with a variety of motives who think of Israel as an indispensable military ally of the US in an unending conflict with Islam. The president, despite being frustrated in his larger project of a reconciliation with the Muslim peoples, has made a strategic choice. US material and moral resources are not to be expended on permanent enmity with Iran. The current difficulties with Egypt, Turkey, Iraq, Pakistan and Afghanistan are burden enough. A military conflict between Iran and Israel would ignite a chain reaction in the Near East, the end of which would likely be persistent violence and economic and political chaos.

Once drawn in, the US would find an exit exceedingly difficult. The considerations which led the president to refrain from intervening in Syria - he prefers collaboration with Russia and the EU to contain the civil war - apply to the problems posed by Iran as well. Historically, Israel was not always the client of the US it has become. In its founding wars with the Arab states, Israel obtained political support and weaponry from the Soviet Union. It was aided in developing nuclear arms by France, its military supplier in the war of 1956. Later, under the first Bush, there was a considerable rupture on account of Israel’s invasion of Lebanon. The more compulsively Americans and Israelis affirmed an unbreakable relationship, the more influential segments of US diplomatic, intelligence and military apparatus retained and deepened their doubts. The president chose to make public a long process of unannounced negotiation with Iran, confident that he has the support of the permanent government, the senior officials and military officers who manage US foreign policy. Skepticism and opposition in Congress is mainly the work of

those Republicans who inhabit an imaginary world in which US power is unchallenged. It was pointed out to them that if the US unilaterally withdraws from or blocks further negotiations with Iran, the other parties to the agreement - China, Russia, the EU - will abandon a sanctions regime about which they are in any case entirely unenthusiastic and in which in some cases - China and to a large degree Russia - they do not participate. One critical element of potential resistance to the president has given way. The Jewish organizations, anxious to avoid the role of obedient servants of a foreign government and confronting the ambivalence, unease and opposition of a large segment of the American Jewish community, refused Netanyahu’s demands that they oppose the president. Their decision follows much debate, in and outside the Jewish community, over a survey by the reliable Pew Research Center, which suggests that a majority of American Jews do not consider Israel the center of their moral and political lives. They think of themselves as primarily US citizens concerned with the nation in which they live. That poses problems the Jewish organizations cannot solve by

repeating clichés about the common interests that unite Israel and the US. The Israel lobby’s retreat in recent days is a very significant event - made possible by Obama’s and Secretary of State John Kerry’s ability to seize the occasion. Does this mean, as some of the less sophisticated commentators say, a generalized US withdrawal from engagement abroad and in the Near East? That is a caricature. The question the president has confronted is what sort of engagement best suits the US’ national interest. He also has learned from the expenditure of trillions of dollars and the loss of thousands of our citizens that military interventions can cause more problems than they solve. A process of rethinking has not only begun but is spreading through government and public. In time, it will even reach some of our more vociferous legislators. It is too early to predict its specific impact in other geopolitical regions, as in the Pacific area, but it is sure to have one. In other words, we are viewing an uncompleted picture. The author is professor emeritus of Georgetown University Law Center


NATIONAL

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January 2014

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Santa Barbara Muslims Get First Mosque CAIRO – A years-old dream of the first Islamic worshipping house in Goleta city in the southern Santa Barbara County, California, has finally come true after the Muslim community received the green light earlier this week. “All of us made history today,” Jamal Hamdani, the chair of the Islamic Society of Santa Barbara, said after the Center’s approval, Santa Barbra Independent reported on Thursday, December 19. “I am truly proud to be an American, a Muslim, and a member of this community.” Goleta Muslim community has been waiting for the approval of their proposed Islamic centre since 2001, after buying the land at the corner of Los Carneros Road and Calle Real. Living together for 30 years, more than 35 Muslim families along with students from US Santa Barbara University and Santa Barbra City College have formed the Islamic Society of Santa Barbara (ISSB). Without a worship place, Muslims community used to pray in the Goleta Valley Community Center. This all changed after the Muslim community got the go ahead for

their own centre, thanking Goleta City Council who has unanimously approved the project. “You’ve waited a long time for a home and now you have it,” Councilwoman Paula Perotte told

the new Islamic centre was vehemently welcomed by Goleta Muslims. “All these people come together for one purpose, and that’s to follow the journey of the Islamic Society

Noozhawk. The approved Islamic centre will be 10,000 square foot including a mosque, a dining room and a lecture hall. “People can finally come to our house, our place,” said Yama Niazi, the imam for the Islamic Society of Santa Barbara. Community Support The community’s support for

to its final home in the good land,” said Councilman Roger Aceves. “I think it’s an absolutely perfect project for this site,” said Ernest Kolendrianos, who attended the council. “What was shared there was an experience of the world that we would all like to be part of,” said Rabbi Steve Cohen of Congregation B’nai B’rith.

HAJI BABA

Continued from p. 1

Syria Children, Breadwinners in Refuge

MIDDLE EASTERN FOOD

“I already have one Syrian,” Joseph Nakhle, the shop owner, would say, pointing to Omar. “Go someplace else.” “Omar is a hard worker and more important he is very polite,” Nakhle said. “That’s the reason I’ve kept him around.” Growing Fast In the winter, Omar worries usually increase as he strives to make ends meet. “My salary comes from this hand and goes out the other,” he said. The growing responsibility of young Omar was adding so many woes to his ailing father. “I never saw him cry so much in 20 years of marriage,” Raghda al-Kurdi, Omar’s mother, said referring to her husband. Long accustomed to relying on her

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The same enthusiasm for the Islamic centre was shared by the council members who praised the unique design of the centre. “We’ve never had a meeting like this in City Hall,” said Ed Easton, a council member. “This is amazing. This is amazing.” Lauding the project, Councilman Jim Farr said, “I’ve only been on council a year, but this is far and away the most rewarding experience I’ve had yet.” “I don’t want to get too emotional here, but it’s been great to be a part of it,” he added. The United States is home to a Muslim minority of between six to eight million. A recent survey found that American Muslims are the most moderate around the world. It also showed that US Muslims generally express strong commitment to their faith and tend not to see an inherent conflict between being devout and living in a modern society. An earlier Gallup poll found that the majority of Americans Muslims are loyal to their country and optimistic about their future in the United States. husband, the mother now takes the list of family needs directly to Omar. “We weren’t poor in Syria. I could provide for my family. We aren’t used to this,” the tearful mother, a former shopkeeper, said. “This is what God wanted for me,” Omar said, as he walked to work, “to grow up very fast.” The revolt against Assad began as peaceful protests calling for democracy and greater rights, but gradually turned to an armed struggle, pitting the Sunni majority against the president and his minority Alawite sect. The UK based network, said that the toll included 44,381 civilians, 6,627 children and 4,454 women. Thirty three months after the eruption of the revolt against Syrian President Bashar Al-Assad, more than two million Syrians have been forced to flee their home to neighboring countries in addition to the displacement of two millions others inside the country. In Lebanon alone, more than 835,000 Syrian refugees are registered, although the real number is thought to total more than one million.


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DATING/INTERNATIONAL

january 2014

www.AZMuslimVoice.com

Muslims Dating Site Replaces Aunties CAIRO – For those tired of all ‘possibilities’ that aunties keep

Mubeen were discussing dating in an online forum for Muslim

respected individuals Muslim organizations

and from

the kitchen and shouldn’t work or get an education then I am not

bringing up, a new site is gaining foothold among single Muslims trying to find the right person from Washington to London to Cairo. “We fill in that space that maybe our community or mosques don’t,” Humaira Mubeen, a 24-year-old Pakistani-American, told Christian Science Monitor. “We’re giving them a space to come, maybe not for marriage, but at least to test the waters,” she added. Mubeen was speaking about HipsterShaadi.com, a new site catering to young Muslims “tired of all the ‘possibilities’ the aunties keep bringing up at every get-together,” according to its Facebook page. The project was born when Sheereen Nourollahi, a 26-yearold Iranian-American, and

hipsters, or “Mipsterz.” Launched last October, the site creators said they hope to reach out to “third-culture kids”, singles in their 20s and 30s, who are often highly educated firstgeneration Americans and are struggling to balance multiple cultural identities. After two months, the site has 650 users from around the world capitals such as Washington and London, as well as in the Middle East, in places like Egypt and the Palestinian territories. Although there are no official figures, the United States is believed to be home to between 6-8 Muslims. Matchmaking is one function that has not faded with modernity. In recent years, as matchmakers,

communities, especially in the UK and the US, have sought to resolve the problem of finding a suitable partner in a halal way by organizing social events. These events allow for those seeking marriage to meet prospective partners with their families present. Success For some Muslims, the new site has given them a new hope of finding the right person. Ana, a Palestinian-American from New Jersey, was thrilled when she saw the new website, signing up a new profile immediately. “Not looking for someone more religious than I am (I fast, don’t pray yet),” she writes. “If you think a woman belongs in

interested.” Browsing usernames like KhanyeWest, Pakiswagger, and MakeChaiNotWar, Ana says she was optimistic about meeting “someone that was more of a ‘modern/Americanized’ Muslim.” Replacing ordinary matchmaking, the site was breaking taboos connecting these sites with dating. But “those taboos are going away rapidly,” says Hassan Shaikley, one of the site’s young programmers. It serves a modern generation of Muslims who are still fully aware that “in the religion, marriage is encouraged – and marriage is said to embody half of the faith,” he added.

Talk of the Town By Maguy Makhlouf Lebanon is known as a country that doesn’t sleep. More than half of the people are busy creating and executing events. Through the media, all those activities are exposed, such as theater, movies, concerts, shows, art and educational exhibitions and social activities. Television stations are the best places to update viewers and audiences and spread the latest news. Hosts welcome celebrities, actors and actresses, comedians, directors, writers, photographers, painters......... People all over the world are interested in talk show programs since the first talk show in 1948, on three networks, ABC, CBS and NBC. Through the years, different types of talk shows appeared, such as the outlandish traditional talk show of “Late Show with David Letterman.” The public affairs show is another type of talk show in which a host or hosts interviews people in the news or an expert in a given field. The informal

guest-host format is what most of the shows used on television stations, such as “Talk of the Town,” the Lebanese talk show on MTV. “Talk of the Town,” “Tout Le Monde En Parle” or “Hadis Al Balad “ in the Arabic languages, is a talk show program on MTV Lebanese channel, covering the recent events in this country. “’Hadis Al Balad’ is a French format talk show,” said Ms. Corine Medawar, the executive producer for Periba Production. “Our production company has the exclusive right to this talk show since 2006. From that time, this program is still rating the first talk show in Lebanon and Middle East. To keep this show in this standard, the team of more than 60 specialists works very hard and

with skillfulness,” Medawar added. People who watch this program weekly, notice a new idea in every new season. Some change is required considering the

development of the life style, but in most conditions, it keeps the original format. I had the chance to be a member of the editor’s team in this program in his first episodes in 2006; I enjoyed doing it. The team was adorable, serious, professional and smart. In

every episode of this program, celebrity artists and well-known people from different categories create a warm ambiance. Bassem Christo, the director of “Talk of the Town,” is well known in Lebanon and the Middle East because of his execution of many shows, big events and video clips. For him to keep a program show as the top one for more than five years is a challenge. Christo executes this show with high professionalism. Mona Hamzi, the presenter of this show, is educated, polite, respectable and a good looking woman. She manages and holds the show with fluency and smoothness. A permanent guest, Michel Souleiman, a comedian, makes people and guests laugh with his comments. “Talk of the Town” is an example of one of many shows seen on different Lebanese channels. All of these shows have a high professionalism to expose the good side of Lebanon’s art and civilization.


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FAMILY

January 2014

7

Ten Tips for Better Intimacy Between Spouses Intimacy between married couples starts slowly and deepens over time with kindness and understanding. Below are ten tips for a healthy intimate relationship with your spouse. 1. Kiss, kiss, kiss… Kiss. Kiss often. Kiss deeply. Kiss deeply often with passion. Kiss for no reason. Make kissing a routine. Savor kisses. 2. Look, speak, and touch each other gently A kind expression; whispered words that express appreciation, compliments, or desire; and a gentle touch on the arm or shoulders are their own aphrodisiacs. 3. Recognize your spouse’s sexual zones As spouses grow more and more familiar during intimacy, certain patterns will emerge over time. Although some people fear that patterns are the path to boredom, the reality is that remembering and reinforcing those things that please our spouses enhances the intimate relationship and the marriage overall. 4. Understand, accept and appreciate natural sexual development Scientific research suggests that men reach their sexual peak in their late teens or early twenties, whereas women reach theirs a decade or more later. Often when a woman is in her thirties and forties her desire for intimacy may surge. As a man ages, his patience, selfcontrol, and emotional maturity increases. Through each stage, couples grow and learn more about each other and become more patient and sensitive to each other’s needs. This is wonderful because it allows a couple’s intimate life to balance out. 5. Acknowledge the different kinds of intimacy Many women who have converted into Islam worry about becoming sexual slaves due to distorted reports of women’s obligations to satisfy the lusts of men. This could be no further from the truth. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) warned men that their wives have rights over them – this includes intimate contact. It is not a one-way street. Wives

may have their own needs from their husbands. Some couples, especially young married couples or those overly influenced by media portrayals, may feel that passionate intimacy is the only goal. However, every time a couple joins, there is no need to be fireworks. This is because intimacy is variable. There are times when intimacy will simply be a comfort. Other times it may be functional, celebratory, or satisfy a need or desire in the moment. Yet, other times it might happen simply because the couple is close together.

Marriage is about sharing mood and emotions as well as physical contact. Having someone there for us during these times creates a bond and trust that benefits our psyche and produces feelings of happiness. It also benefits us physically by releasing endorphins and lowering anxiety. Whatever the kind of intimacy a couple engages in, ultimately intimacy connects the couple, maintaining and strengthening the marital relationship. 6. Put her in the mood Men are more likely to be stimulated by visual images. Something as simple as his wife’s smile, the flip of her hair, or her movements as she goes about her day may trigger feelings of passion. However, acting on these impulses all of the time without considering that women need to mentally prepare for sex is counterproductive. Often couples confine themselves to a very small definition of foreplay. A wife may respond to hugs and caresses, playful attention, certain foods, or even conversation that is pleasing thus putting her in the mood. There is a hadith where the Prophet (pbuh) implied that engaging in intimacy without foreplay could be considered an act of cruelty to

the wife. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Let none of you come upon his wife like an animal, let there be an emissary between them.” When asked what the emissary is, he replied, “The kiss and sweet words.” As women age, they may experience pain or tearing without stimulation that releases fluids for ease of entry. Therefore, the strength of a good intimate relationship relies a lot on doing that good deed. 7. Communicate Even after years of marriage, many couples may still feel shy about communicating sexual needs or sexual problems. This is especially an issue for men who commonly do not want to give the wife the impression that they are anything other than strong and virile. In some instances, there may be physical concerns that affect ability, desire, and frequency of intimate contact. Couples may lie in silent frustration, too embarrassed to discuss so they start to grow apart. Remember that you are both each other’s only halal means of sexual fulfillment. Spouses have a right to know and assist when they find that the other has a physical issue that is affecting intimacy. As couples grow, they will learn how to speak of these things and maintain a certain amount of modesty in doing so. Couples sometimes also feel shy about addressing frequency even if there is no physical problem. Expectations of what constitutes ‘normal’ in the relationship

can only be defined through communication. 8. Comfort each other After intimate contact, couples need to take time to savor the closeness they feel in that moment. After intimacy, hold each other and talk to each other. Feel relaxed in each other’s arms and express feelings of love, dreams, goals or even concerns. The natural closeness of this time should be cherished. 9. Prioritize Married couples too often let the children and job/career obligations overtake them and their time. Many therapists and marriage counselors report that fatigue is the number one enemy of spousal intimacy. When couples are preoccupied or tired from work, intimacy is usually one of the first things to go. If couples get into the habit of delaying intimate contact, it often starts a pattern of having feelings of inadequacy or doubt. This can then be translated into more frequent disagreements as we consciously or subconsciously act out our dissatisfaction with the situation. No couple wants to find themselves in a rut where they feel intimacy is a thing of the past. There is a solution to this problem and that is making each other a priority. This takes a constant effort. If exhaustion is really an issue, make a plan – find time to rest so that you can enjoy some time together. Make each other a priority. 10. Hooray! It’s Halal. Engaging in intimate contact stirs the craving for more contact. Intimacy elevates the brain chemicals associated with desire and happiness. This human contact in marriage is ordained and encouraged for couples, so do it.


8

INTERNATIONAL

january 2014

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Bulldozed Relief Camps Anger India Muslims CAIRO – Indian Muslim scholars have threatened to lead largescale protests if “bulldozing” postriot relief camps at Muzaffarnagar and Shamli in the northern Indian state of Uttar Pradesh has not stopped. “The state government is resorting to all sorts of tactics to hide its failures,” Maulana Aamir Rashadi Madani, the president of Rashtriya Ulama Council (RUC), told The Indian Express on Sunday, December 29. “But its latest act of bulldozing the camps is the limit of injustice.” Last August, Hindu-Muslim clashes erupted in Muzaffarnagar, located in the western part of the Uttar Pradesh province. The riots resulted in the death of at least 60 and forced some 70,000 Muslims to flee their villages, according to the state government. In October 31, a fresh outbreak of violence killed four Muslims in the same region hit by deadly communal clashes. Muzaffarnagar district remains tense, with many who fled last month’s violence still living in camps. The situation got worse when Uttar Pradesh government begun

a partial removal of the tents in the relief camps last Saturday. Displaced people have claimed that they were forcefully evicted from their camps without being offered alternative shelters or

compensation. “Stop the bulldozers, stop comments on the madarsas, the NGOs working in relief camps and on those living in camps, else we are ready to take to the streets,” Madani said. Slamming Uttar Pradesh government, Madani added that the government cares only for the ‘Yadavs’; a term used to refer to non-elite, pastoral community. He threatened to stage large

Arabic Yellow Pages

protests in mid-January if the government did not take solid steps to develop the district. “Calling Muslim ministers in the Akhilesh government Muslims is disrespect to the community,” RUC president said. “Azam Khan should be called Azam Yadav while (health minister) Ahmad Hasan should be referred as Ahmad Hasan Yadav.” Death Camps Relief camps set for Muslims who escaped Hindu riots in Muzaffarangar have turned into death camps after 34 children died of cold, a charge denied by local government. “Nobody can die of cold. If people died of cold, nobody would have been alive in Siberia,” Principal secretary (Home) Anil Kumar Gupta said earlier, sparking Muslims anger. After months in relief camps, Muslims still fear for their lives, recalling memories of death and gang-rape. “More rapes have been committed

in the Muzaffarnagar relief camps than during the 2002 Gujarat riots,” RUC president said There are some 140 million Muslims in Hindu-majority India and they have long complained of being discriminated against in all walks of life. Muzaffarnagar anti-Muslim attacks are not the first in India. Violence pitting Muslims against Hindus has been a defining feature of Indian politics since the country’s traumatic separation from Pakistan in 1947, when hundreds of thousands of people were killed and millions were displaced. Religion and caste violence plays a central role in politics in Uttar Pradesh, one of India’s poorest states with a population larger than that of Russia. In 1992, 2,000 people were killed in riots after the demolition of a 16th century mosque built near a sacred Hindu site in the Uttar Pradesh town of Ayodhya, on the banks of the Ganges river. Hindu political mobilization around that conflict thrust the BJP onto the national stage and played a role in bringing it to power in the late 1990s.

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2014 EDITION NOW AVAILABLE AT LOCAL STORES & mASJIDS www.ArabicDaleel.com For More Info call 602-258-7770

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january 2014

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Floods Add To Gazans Misery GAZA CITY – Thousands of Gazans have been forced to evacuate their homes after unprecedented disastrous floods destroyed their homes and killed at least one person, in what the United Nations declared a “disaster area”. “Large swathes of northern Gaza are a disaster area with water as far as the eye can see,” the United Nations Relief Works Agency (UNRWA) that administers refugee camps in the Palestinian territory, said in a statement cited by Reuters on Saturday, December 14. The besieged enclave was hit by storm Alexa, deemed as the worst in the past six decades. Heavy snowfalls, torrential rain and icy winds have caused havoc, bringing down power lines, blocking roads and trapping people in homes and cars in the Middle East. The severe weather has also paralyzed Palestinian cities such as Hebron in the occupied West Bank as well as Al-Quds (Occupied East Jerusalem). In Gaza, many people were trapped inside homes inundated by rising waters.

A 22-year-old Palestinian man died from smoke inhalation on Saturday after lighting a fire to warm his home, a government spokesman said. The Gaza health ministry said 100

other people had been hurt as flood waters damaged poorly built homes in the coastal territory. Among those injured were people who had been hit by objects falling from inundated buildings or had been in car accidents on flooded roads. One of the most densely populated tracts on earth, Gaza is home to mostly impoverished refugees and

their descendants. Israel has clamped a severe blockade on Gaza since Hamas was voted to power in Gaza in 2006. The siege was further tightened after Hamas assumed full control of the strip in 2007. The crippling siege has badly worsened livelihood in the impoverished seaside strip. The situation further deteriorated after Israel launched a three-week deadly offensive in late 2008, killing more than 1,400 people and injured thousands and left the strip in tatters. The siege leaves most Gazans cut off from the outside world and struggling with desperate poverty. Dire Situation Struggling to survive bad weather, thousands of Palestinians evacuated from their homes to take shelter in schools as the Gaza health ministry declared a state of “extreme emergency”.

Around 4,000 UN workers were evacuating families and distributing emergency supplies, including fuel to pumping stations. “The situation is dire, and with the flood waters rising, the risk of waterborne disease can only increase,” Gunness said. “This is a terrible situation which can only get worse before it gets better.” Jabaliya refugee camp, in the northern Gaza Strip, had “become a massive lake with two-meterhigh waters engulfing homes and stranding thousands,” according to Chris Gunness, of the UN agency for Palestinian refugees, Unrwa. “Large swaths of northern Gaza are a disaster area with water as far as the eye can see,” he added. Gaza’s Hamas government said 5,246 people in all had been evacuated to schools and other centers used as temporary shelters in the past four days. Gaza’s 1.8 million people have also endured daily blackouts of around 12 hours since the territory’s lone power plant was switched off last month due to a fuel shortage.

Chinese Muslims Donate Clothes to Syria

CAIRO - In a quick response to a Syrian appeal made recently by OnIslam.net, titled “The World Has Forgotten Them”, revealing harsh weather conditions facing Syrian refugees in their camps during winter, we received a warm message, below, sent by a Chinese Muslim, displaying a generous gesture towards the Syrian refugees, amidst the plight and ordeal facing the refugees. In this video, you will see how some Chinese Muslims, despite their poverty, have come together to collect clothes to send to Syrian refugees, in line with the noble teachings of Islam.

Here follows the message we got, signed by the name “Ismaelan”: “The final months of 2013 is already the third winter of Syria war. Snowflakes fall with barrel bombs. The white snow and red blood cover the older civilization. Though I read “The World Has Forgotten Them” from Onislam. net, thinking about millions of the refugees in Syrian “war against terrorism”, I only remained silent. After you speak for oppressed, you are cautioned. When you look for food for others from the refrigerator, you find your refrigerator is also empty. How else can you do? I ask human despair geological: “Have you heard? Have you seen?” Chinese Muslims lately donated clothes and money to Syrian refugees. Chinese muslims live not rich. Most of them are civilians bottom but their hearts with the people of Syrian. Praise for Allah!”


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INTERNATIONAL

January 2014

11

Toronto Convention Inspires Muslim Change TORONTO – For over 20,000 Muslim visitors this year, the Reviving Islamic Spirit convention has offered them a special cocktail of inspirational speech from renowned Muslim speakers, sending an out loud message of personal, communal and environmental change. “Muslims are meant to be people of high aspirations,” British scholar, Sheikh Zahir Mahmood, told the audience on the second day of convention on Saturday, December 28. “Don’t let anything bring you down.” Over 20,000 people were in attendance to listen to Muslim scholars and academics speak on how to effect personal, communal and environmental change. In a joint session, Dalia Mogahed, a Senior Analyst and Executive Director of the Gallup Center for Muslim Studies, and Dr. John Esposito, a well-known Professor of Religion and International Affairs at Georgetown University, discussed the growing Muslim presence in North America. “Muslims are a vital organ in the body of society and not a benign cancer,” said Dalia Mogahed. “Real challenge for the Muslim community is to strategize their resources,” Dr. John Esposito added. In another highly anticipated presentation, Dr. Seyyed Hossein Nasr spoke on the topic, ‘Sacred Science and the Environmental Crisis.’ “The environmental crisis is the result of the application of modern science,” said Dr. Seyyed Hossein Nasr. “Modern science does not deal with the nature of things as they are.” “Modern science is based on the negation of all levels of reality,” he added. Seyyed Hossein Nasr, currently University Professor of Islamic Studies at the George Washington University, Washington DC is one of the most important and foremost scholars of Islamic, Religious and Comparative Studies in the world today. “The goal of science, as applied, is power,” Dr. Nasr noted. “The goal of Islamic sciences is the perfection of the human soul.” The event, running from December 27 through December 29, is held

in the heart of downtown Toronto at the Metro Toronto Convention Center, next to the iconic CN Tower.

The convention has become a staple in Toronto’s downtown core during the Christmas holiday season, adding a boost to the local economy. Personal Development “Stand for something, respect yourself and do it by any means necessary,” Ambassador Shabazz, eldest daughter of the late Malcolm X Shabazz. Throughout the day, a number of lectures dealt with personal development of Muslims, especially youth. “When we don’t forgive negative emotions, we experience darkness and constriction in our hearts,” advised Sheikh Mokhtar Maghraoui of Al-Madina Institute, a wellknown scholar in North America. “If we are distanced from the source, then we cannot drink from it,” he said. “Get out of darkness.” Speaking on the topic of ‘Respecting Others’, Ambassador Shabazz, eldest daughter of the late Malcolm X Shabazz, commended the youths who started the convention 12 years ago and for providing an open platform and space for all peoples. “You don’t have to be Muslim to benefit from the spirit of Islam,” she said. “In Islam, our definition of brother should never mean other.” In a poignant moment, Ambassador Shabazz read excerpts from her father’s letter after his life-changing trip for the Hajj. “Stand for something, respect yourself and do it by any means necessary,” she said in her parting advise. In his lecture, Professor Tariq Ramadan urged the convention goers to be proactive in getting to know their society and fellow citizens. “Don’t victimize yourself and tell people they should know about

Islam,” said Professor Ramadan. “Muslims need to know the people.” In the final session of the day, the well-known American Islamic scholar, Sheikh Hamza Yusuf, held the attention of the convention with his lecture on the topic, ‘When Worlds Wither: Guidance in the Latter Days.’ “I’m amazed at a community whose Lord told them to help one another while some die from starvation and some die from over eating,” said Sheikh Hamza Yusuf. “Jellyfish are taking over the oceans - they are mindless, spineless and all they do is consume,” he noted. “This is a manifestation of our current state. “If you follow your whims you will be led astray from the path of God,” said Sheikh Hamza Yusuf. In addition to the plenary sessions, the event includes a bustling grand Souk (bazaar), with vendors from all across North America selling

and promoting their products and services. The convention, which will conclude on Sunday, is also hosting the annual food and coat drive to assist the needy in the Greater Toronto Area. Muslims are the fastest growing religious community in Canada, according to the country’s statistical agency, Statistics Canada. Canada’s Muslim population increased by 82 percent over the past decade – from about 579,000 in

2001 to more than 1 million in 2011. Muslims represent 3.2 percent of Canada’s total population.


12

Parentening

january 2014

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School Homework Could Be Effortless! The traditional scene in many homes is the daily quarrel and nagging about completing the child’s homework no matter how boring or tiresome it may be. Mothers complain all the time about how they spend hours of their precious lifetime with their children to help them with their assignments. This sacrifice could reach the extent of preventing mothers from going out or doing any personal requirement, as this will make the mother entirely preoccupied, remaining seated, making sure the child pays proper attention to his homework... In addition to the homework being boring and sometimes useless, the mothers over stress about it in a negative way. Thus, instead of using homework time in a positive way that strengthens the bond between parent and child, on the contrary, it has the most repulsive and extremely negative impact on the parent-child relationship as well as the child’s passion for learning. So, how do you as a parent ensure you don’t fall into this tornado of Homework disaster? Early Literacy (Nursery Stage) Make sure you choose the right nursery for your child, which provides a well-balanced reading program that reinforces early literacy. Also, make sure that it’s a well achieving program, which doesn’t force children into skills that are above their developmental level. When the child is lovingly attached to reading at a very young age, it becomes an inbuilt passion and a very essential skill for his formal school life later And if a child goes into school a strong reader, this ensures his school achievements because simply everything goes easily and smoothly without difficulties. An important precipitating factor of early literacy success is encouraging pretend play. So, make sure your child’s nursery provides ample periods for unstructured play. Kindergarten Stage If your child is past the nursery crucial phase, make sure that the school you choose adopts a good phonetically based and leveled reading program. The program should ensure that every child is taken individually to be assessed for his or her own pace. Also,make sure that your child’s first experience with learning and home assignments is a pleasant one. If you frown and shout for your child to do the homework, a very negative impression of learning will be printed in your child’s mind and heart for a long time and maybe forever.That’s why when you say to your child “Do you have homework?” you should put on a facial expression of a fun activity

Tips for Parents

like playing together or having ice cream Homework time should be fun as long as you can convince your child it is fun, afterwards when he is old enough, he would unfortunately learn from his peers that it’s not that fun.

This is when you model for your child your own work efforts. Be careful not to complain of working, you can never expect your child to enjoy his own work. By this age, your child should be completely independent, meaning you are free as a parent to go out or

Elementary Stage This is the time when you make sure your help is not causing your child to be dependent on you. This is the stage when your child will learn to be responsible for his own actions and bear with its consequences. So, it is not at all advisable to correct your child’s homework for him to get a full mark. This action will also mislead the teacher into a false assessment of the level of the child, which confuses the whole plan of teaching within the child’s developmental level. It is much better for your child to lose a few marks at this early stage than later when he refuses your help or rejects it. At this age, you also focus on the ‘love of learning’ so, even if your child’s school is not teaching through real life activities and projects, then you should adopt this strategy at home. For example, inventing a game, song or activity for a boring lesson or going for a real life trip that is relevant to implement this harsh lesson. If you are going to be occasionally beside your child for coaching and skills acquiring, then make sure it’s a lovable charming and intimate time, with hugs, kisses, hair patting and emotional support. These emotions will be automatically interpreted as a favorable experience of this homework time, which he will grow to love by association without knowing why. When you praise your child for working, do it sincerely and using descriptive sentences like “I love how you write neatly” not just “Good job”! Middle school stage

watch TV even if your child has an exam the next day. This level of independence could be reached as early as the previous elementary stage if you start as early as the nursery stage.

Avoid comparing your child with his peers or any of his colleagues; this totally reverses your child’s passion for achievement. And even if your child is tempted to make you happy and does work hard just to please you, it will cause a very serious problem of always feeling “not enough” and down goes his self-confidence. This may also lead your child to think that he was working for you and not for himself, which leads to loss of enthusiasm for achievement. High school Stage Of course, at this age your child is another adult at home so your only involvement will be according to his request. Like for example asking you to listen to his presentation rehearsal or give your opinion on something he made. All through the previous stages, it is NEVER appropriate to; blame, shame or negatively label a child. Physical and verbal abuse is also out of the question if you want to ensure your child’s physical, emotional and psychological wellbeing. It is easily and enjoyably possible for your child to be an independent self-motivated learner only if you do your homework as a parent.

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January 2014

13

Disobeying the Parent Is a Grave Matter

By Lolita V Jefferson Ed.D Thankfulness, gentleness and gratitude are the three basic qualities that made one be a good person. One who does not cultivate these basic attitudes within him can neither fulfill his duties towards Allah nor the people: Hence Muslims who are obedient to Almighty Allah can never be disobedient or even careless to their parents. Abu Bakr narrated that the Prophet (PBUH) asked that should he not warn them against the three major sins. All of them said, “Certainly, O Prophet!” He then said, “To ascribe partners with Allah, to disobey the parents.” Getting up,as he was reclining, he said, “To tell a lie or to give false evidence.” He went on repeating his words for such a long time that we wished him to be silent. (Bukhârî and Muslim) In this hadith the word “aqooq” has been used, for the disobedience to parents. It`s an Arabic word which means carelessness, cruelty, painful attitude and disobedience. It is narrated that the Prophet (PBUH) said, “Allah postpones the punishment for one’s sins till the Day of Judgment if He so desires. But He award the punishment for disobeying the parents during this life, before his death.”(Authentic, AlHakim) This means that the disobedient children will be punished twice; once in this world and secondly in the Hereafter. In the hadith narrated by Thauban, the Prophet (PBUH) indicated that the following three major sins can nullify all other virtues: Ascribing partners

with Allah, disobedience to parents and fleeing from Jihad. DISOBEDIENCE TO MOTHERS Mughairah bin Shu’bah relates that the Prophet, (PBUH) once said, “Be sure that Allah has forbidden you to disobey your mothers, to be miserly and greedy, and infanticide (burying the new born daughters alive.) And He dislikes you to be talkative and too inquisitive and to waste your belongings.” It also implies that we should take extreme care of the sentiments, habits, temperament and likes and dislikes of mothers. We should not even imagine being rude and disobedient to her. By serving and obeying our mothers we can be sure of earning the favor of Almighty Allah. The extent of sufferings resulting from disobedience to mothers can be seen from the following hadith: Once, when the Prophet(PBUH) was talking to his companions a man came and addressed him, “O Messenger of Allah ! A young man is breathing his last. People are asking him to recite Shahadah but he is unable to do so.” The Prophet (PBUH) asked, “Did this man offer Salah (during his life)?” The answer was yes. Then he accompanied the man to the house of the dying young man along with others present at the time. The man was at the end of his life’s journey. The Messenger of Allah advised him to offer the Shahadah. The man replied that he was unable to do so as the words would not come out of his mouth. He (PBUH) then called for

the mother of the dying man whom he had disobeyed persistently. When his aged mother approached the scene, the Prophet (PBUH) asked, ‘Respected lady, is he your son?” She replied yes. He then asked her a question, “O respected lady, if we threaten to throw your son into a raging fire, would you recommend him to be forgiven?” The lady replied that she would definitely do so at that time. The Prophet (PBUH) then said to her, “If so, declare, making Allah and me your witnesses, that you are mow pleased with him.” The old woman readily declared, “O Allah, you and your Messenger be my witness that I am pleased with this beloved son of mine.” Just after that, the Prophet (PBUH) turned to the dying man and asked him to recite, “There is no god but Allah, He is the One and has no partners and I witness that Muhammad is His Servant and Messenger.” By the virtue of the forgiveness of his mother, he found the words flowing out of his mouth and he recited the Shahadah. Seeing this, the Prophet (PBUH) praised Almighty Allah and thanked Him saying, “Thanks to Almighty Allah that He saved this man from the fearful fire of Hell through me.” (Tabarani and Ahmad). Acknowledging the great favor of the parents is central to our success in being right with them, as they are the cause of our existence. It will enable us to see ihsan towards the parents as a sign of a healthy, natural disposition. Unfortunately, sometimes this disposition gets distorted and people start viewing their own existence with

resentment. Consequently, they blame their parents for bringing them into this world or that they may not be living at the ease and joy they think they deserve. Human beings existence is due to Allah and to Him alone, for He wills who will be one’s parents, where one will be born, the time of birth and what sustenance will he receive. Our parents have done us a great favor, our Creator has told us not to even show them signs of discontent if they did something we did not like or were wrong about anything. But to pay back their favor by being loving, kind and dutiful to them is the absolute minimum that all us have to do. So let us Muslims not adapt the attitudes of the popular culture in which we find ourselves, where mothers are nothing more than serving girls and fathers nothing more than errand boys. We must combat what the television and society say about how parents should be treated, by sharing with our children what Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, and His Messenger, sallallaahu alayhe wa salaam, have said about the rights of parents. And most importantly, we must teach them by setting the best example; by treating our parents with the love, respect, honor and tenderness they deserve. Children imitate what they see, by us being good to our parents, we can hope that our children imitate what they see, by us being good to our parents; we can hope that our children will in turn be good to us.

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CALENDAR / ANNOUNCEMENTS

January 2014

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Phoenix Prayer Times

Tucson Prayer Times

ISLAMIC WEEKEND SCHOOLS

Directions to the Islamic Cultural Center Cemetery

January 2014 • Muharam/Safar 1434 H

Islamic Community Center of Phoenix: Islamic Cultural Center: Muslim Community Mosque: Masjid Omar ICNEV Weekend Islamic School ACA Weekend School Sultan Education in Chandler Greenway Islamic Academy

January 2014• Muharam/Safar 1434 H

Sunday at 9:45 am-1:20 pm. Sunday at 10:00 am Sunday at 10:00 am until 2:30 pm. Saturday & Sunday from 10:00 am until 1:00 pm. Tel: (480) 346-2081Classes held on Sunday K thru’ grade 12 from 10:00 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. Sunday 10:00 am-1:15 pm. www.azacademy.org/weekend Saturdays & Sundays - children/adults 480-593-7066 Tajweed, Islamic Studies, & Arabic Language 602-565-0500

From the Islamic Cultural Center (ICC):

Check our website for up to date information www.tempemasjid.com

1) Go South on Forest to University Drive. Turn right. 2) Go West on University to the I-10 highway. Take I-10 East. 3) Proceed on I-10 East (~12 Miles). Exit at Queen Creek Rd. (EXIT #164). 4) Turn right on route 347 South. Proceed for about 14 miles. 5) Turn right on route 238 West. Proceed for about 8.7 miles. 6) Turn right on unnamed/unpaved street after you see the street sign which reads “36 miles” and proceed to the cemetery.

IN CASE OF DEATH • Call Sandy at Angel’s Burial, at 480-962-6435 • Total cost is $1,800.00

ISLAMIC CENTERS IN ARIZONA

PHOENIX Arizona Cultural Academy 7810 S. 42nd Pl. • Phoenix 602-454-1222 Islamic Center of Arizona 9032 N. 9th St. • Phoenix

Islamic Center of N. Phoenix 13246 N. 23rd Ave. 85029 602-371-3440 Islamic Comnty Ctr of Phx 7516 N. Black Canyon Hwy. Phoenix • 602-249-0496 Muslim Community Mosque 1818 N. 32nd St. • Phoenix 602-306-4959 Masjid Al-Rahmah 2645 E. McDowell Rd. • Phoenix 602-275-5493 Masjid Muhammad Ibn Abdullah

5648 N. 15th ave. Phoenix, AZ 85015 602-413-5279

Al Rasoul Mosque 5302 N. 35th Ave. • Phoenix 602-864-1817

CHANDLER Masjid AsSalam 1071 N. Alma School Rd.• Chandler 480-250-7522

PEORIA Greenway Islamic Center 6724 West Greenway • Peoria, Islamic Center of East Valley AZ www.greenwaymasjid.com 425 N. Alma School Dr. • Chandler TEMPE 602-388-9900 Islamic Comnty Ctr of Tempe LAVEEN 131 E. 6th Street • Tempe 480-894-6070 Islamic Center of Laveen P.O. Box 1107 • Laveen Masjid Al Mahdi 602-361-4401 1016 S. River Dr. • Tempe MARICOPA 480-557-9699 Masjid Bilal Ibn Rabah Masjid Omar Bin Al-Khattab 44370 W. Arizona Ave. Maricopa Arizona 85138 6225 S.McClintock • Tempe contact# (602)312-7913 480-775-6627 MESA Masjid-el-Noor 55 N. Matlock • Mesa 480-644-0074 SCOTTSDALE Islamic Center of N.E. Valley 12125 E. Via Linda • Scottsdale 480-612-4044

CASA GRANDE Masjid Sajda is located c/o: The Legacy Suites 540 North Cacheris Court Casa Grande`, Arizona 85122 480.332.8618


Arabic Yellow Pages

‫الدليل العربي‬

NOW AVAILABLE 2014 EDITION AT LOCAL STORES AND MASJIDS www.ArabicDaleel.com

For More Info call 602-258-7770

SM


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