“What I learned during those years was that the emotions of children who are watching a medical trauma play out in the home are extremely surprising and quite complex.”
Emotions and Medical Trauma in the Home By Keri Steele Founder of Little Hearts of Hope
We have all heard the phrase that cancer affects the entire family. What if that family includes young children? How much do they actually understand when a loved one is diagnosed with cancer? When my late husband, Will, was diagnosed with terminal cancer at the age of 33, we had three young children at home ranging in ages from 2-6. I was a stay at home mom, we had recently purchased our forever home, and I had just started homeschooling my oldest. I was 31 years old and grappling with my husband’s diagnosis.
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My first instinct was to put them into therapy. I had no idea how to handle the situation on top of reeling from this news myself. Will was given 6 months to live, but by the grace of God he fought for almost 3 more years with terminal cancer. During those three years, I learned a lot from the different sources that we reached out to for help. The children were in play therapy weekly and I would join them once a month for a family session.
Is this really affecting my children?
Children are naturally self-focused and have very active imaginations. If they aren’t told what is happening with a cancer diagnosis, they will often make something up to explain it to themselves or they will push down the feelings they are experiencing because they can’t make sense of them. What they don’t understand is that those feelings will come out eventually, and usually in an unhealthy way that can be damaging to both themselves and their loved ones.
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