Foreveryoungnovember2017 by Buffalo Spree

NOVEMBER 2017 |

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NOVEMBER 2017

The Color Purple

Foster Grandparents

Life & Leisure

German Getaway

Features: Giving Thanks

Crossword: Famous Poets...................................... StatePoint Media

Thanks for the Memories.................................................Gary Kaye

Home & Garden 8

20 Foster Grandparents............................................ Anthony Chabala 22 Count Your Blessings................................................. Judith Rucki 24 The Power of "Thank You"................................Rebecca Cuthbert

My WNY

The Color Purple in the Garden................................Carol Ann Harlos

26 Sharon Bryk: Oncology Esthetician........................... Judith Rucki

News

Arts 10 November Theater..............................................................Donna Hoke 12 Holiday Movie Highlights..................................Christopher Schobert

Food 13 The Best Way to Use Frozen Peppers.................... Hilary Diodato

28 Exploring Guardianship...........................................Dr. Sam Sugar

Let's Talk About

30 Coping with the Holidays........................................... Judith Rucki

Getaways

32 A Tale of Two German Towns............................... Jennifer Merrick

Cover: Home Health Systems

Being Well

18 Stay Safe and Independent at Home............ Health System Services

34 Apples for Health.................................................... Catharine Stack

Ever y Issue: Calendars 3 | Bingo Buzz 14 | Classifieds & Companion Corner 36 | Noteworthy 37

Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always something happening at

OPEN HOUSE 11/16, 1pm - 3pm

Check out senior living apartments & patio homes open for viewing. Light refreshments served. For Independent Seniors

Maintenance Free Apartments and Patio Homes Make Our Neighborhood Your Neighborhood!

Festive Christmas Fundraiser Luncheon to Benefit Aspire featuring Peter Van Scozza

12/14, 12pm Noon A donation of unwrapped toys for Aspireâ&#x20AC;&#x201C; you pick age/gender

Call For a Tour | 716.741.7741 | 5945 Vinecroft Drive | Clarence Center, NY 14032 | www.vinecroft.org

Family Owned Since 1947

Home of the Living Memorial Carl Evan Fretthold

A picnic lunch will be served President

Entertainment byLicensed the Colgate James P. Fretthold, ManagerThirteen (An all male A cappella group from Colgate University) 1241 Oliver Street * A minimum $10 donation is required

North Tonawanda, NY 14120 Ph: 716-692-2610 frettholdfuneralhome.com

EDITOR’S NOTE OUR 29TH YEAR

1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103 Buffalo, NY 14207 Phone 716.783.9119 Fax 716.783.9983 www.foreveryoungwny.com

PUBLISHER

Sharon C. Levite Editor-In-Chief............................................................................Elizabeth Licata

elicata@buffalospree.com

Editor......................................................................... Wendy Guild Swearingen wswearingen@buffalospree.com

Creative Director........................................................................ Chastity O’Shei

coshei@buffalospree.com

Production Director........................................................................ Jennifer Tudor

jtudor@buffalospree.com

Traffic Coordinator........................................................... Adam Van Schoonhoven Lead Designer............................................................................ Nicholas Vitello Senior Graphic Designers.............................................. Josh Flanigan, Kim Miers, Andrea Rowley, Jean-Pierre Thimot Director of Marketing...................................................................... Brittany Frey

bfrey@buffalospree.com

Director of Advertising............................................................. Barbara E. Macks bmacks@buffalospree.com Special Projects Manager ......................................................... Marianne Potratz Senior Account Executives............. Wendy Burns, Bruce Halpern, Mary Beth Holly, Caroline Kunze, Robin Kurss, Robin Lenhard, Marianne Potratz, Betty Tata, Lori Teibel National Ad Director...................................................................... Terri Downey Spree Marketplace..................................................................... Louis J. Aguglia Administrative & Finance Director.......................................................................Michele Ferguson Administrative & Marketing Coordinator....................................................... Angela Gambacorta Classifieds Sales............................................................................... Robin Kurss BUFFALO SPREE PUBLISHING, INC.

President & CEO....................................................................... Sharon C. Levite Associate Publisher/Editor-In-Chief............................................... Elizabeth Licata Associate Publisher/Advertising................................................ Barbara E. Macks Senior Vice President/Creative Director......................................... Chastity O’Shei Vice President/Administrative & Finance.....................................Michele Ferguson Vice President/Production.............................................................. Jennifer Tudor Corporate Counsel....................................................... Timothy M. O’Mara, Esq. Forever Young is published monthly, with an annual Senior Directory. Copyright ©2017 by Buffalo Spree Publishing, Inc. 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207 and is open Mon.–Fri. 8:30 a.m.–5 p.m. The entire contents of Forever Young are copyrighted 2017 by Buffalo Spree Publishing, Inc. and may not be reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part without written permission from the publishers. All rights reserved. Display advertising information and rates may be obtained by calling (716) 783-9119 ext 2250. Standard mail postage paid at Buffalo, NY 14207. POSTMASTER send change of address to Forever Young, 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207. Manuscripts and free calendar listings should be sent to the editor (wswearingen@buffalospree.com) at 1738 Elmwood Avenue, Suite 103, Buffalo, NY 14207. Material cannot be returned unless accompanied by a self addressed, stamped envelope of adequate size and strength. The publisher does not take responsibility for the accuracy or legitimacy of the advertising message or any aspect of the business operation or conduct of the advertisers in the paper.

This publication is a member of the North American Mature Publishers Association. Membership in NAMPA includes verification of member’s print & circulation totals.

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

From the Editor

Tuning in to the news lately, you may find precious little to feel good about: hurricanes, fires, global political unrest, violence, oppression, disaster everywhere you look. And in our own personal lives, many of us may struggle with illness, we worry about our kids and parents and the upcoming holidays, and there may be debt hanging over our heads causing daily stress that seems insurmountable. And yet...it is possible to stop for a second and be in the present and take a deep breath. Then, in that moment of peace, allow yourself the grace of identifying one blessing in your life. Having trouble with that? Well, did you wake up this morning? That's a good place to start. One especially good way to find happiness is to give some away. Thank a thoughtful friend or neighbor for a kindness they've

shown. Donate your time or some items to a food pantry. Volunteer at the local animal shelter and share your love with some furry friends. Developing an attitude of gratitude lets you control your own state of mind--and just may make this world a better place for everyone.

Wendy Guild Swearingen wswearingen@buffalospree.com 783-9119 ext. 2253

FOREVER YOUNG NOVEMBER CALENDAR 1+

Erie County STAY FIT DINING PROGRAM offers a hot noon meal at 45 locations in Erie County. Menus and site list at erie. gov/stayfit or 858-7639.

Buffalo KRISTALLNACT PROGRAMS Nov. 1-30, "Witnesses: Buffalo's Holocaust-Era Stories" exhibit; ; Nov. 8, 4:30pm, film Complicit, and Q&A with director Robert Krakow and Dr. Sol Messinger; Nov. 9, 4:30 pm, "Jewish-Christian Relations and the Holocaust: A Difficult Past, but Hope for the Future;" Contact: Mara Koven-Gelman, Executive Director, Holocaust Resource Center of Buffalo, mara@hrcbuffalo.org

Gowanda HEALTH COMMUNITY ALLIANCE Activities open to the public age 50+, no residency requirements) held at the Concord Senior Center, 1 School Street, Gowanda; for schedule visit communityalliance.org; 532-1010 or beemana@hcanetwork.org

Niagara Falls SENIOR C O M PA N I O N / F O S T E R GRANDPARENT PROGRAM Looking for seniors who enjoy working with their peers or children. Volunteers receive a tax-free stipend, transportation assistance and supplemental insurance coverage while volunteering. If you are 55+, have a minimum of 15 hours per week to give and want to make a difference, contact Nora Aloian (SCP) at 2858224 ext. 217or Jennifer Britton (FGP) at 285-8224 ext. 228

1 Buffalo HISTORY OF BUFFALO MUSIC Author of History of Buffalo Music & Entertainment gives a 1-hour audio/ video presentation on the book, which will be available for purchase. 6:30 pm, Steel Plant Museum, 100 Lee St., Buffalo. Contact: info@ buffalomusichistory.com 1+

West Seneca UNITED CHURCH MANOR’S LUNCH PROGRAM is looking for volunteers in the West Seneca/Cheektowaga area. Information: 668-5804.

Middleport T.O.P.S. CLUB

Scout House, Rochester Rd., Middleport. Wednesday weigh-in: 3:15–4 p.m.; meeting: 4–5 p.m. Contact Terry at 735-7666

1+ Orchard Park TAI CHI

4 Buffalo POLISH MUSIC AND DANCE The Polish sounds of The Buffalo Touch and the Knews Bands, music, food, beverages and table reservations available. $15 per person, which includes a 32 oz cup of beer. 5–11pm Knights Columbus Hall, 2735 Union Road, Cheektowaga. Call Judy 683-8209 or Bob 668-4145.

Advanced Tai Chi in the Park at Brush Mountain. Classes are held on Wednesdays at 11 am. Tai Chi builds endurance, increases flexibility and balance. New students are welcome. Please contact the Orchard Park Senior Center at 662-6452 for information. Cost $30 for a 8 week session. Amherst FREE RESPITE CARE PROGRAM, 10:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m., Trinity Old Lutheran Church 3445 Sheridan Drive. First Wednesday of the month, for those caring for loved ones with Alzheimer’s or any form of dementia. A morning snack and nutritious lunch are provided. For more information on registering for the program, call 836-4868

1+ Boston HATHA YOGA Wednesdays at 7 pm. Gentle and meditative. Bring your own mat. Faith United Church of Christ, 8651 Boston State Road, Boston, NY. For more info call church office 716-941-3529 1

Williamsville WOMEN’S LYMPHEDEMA SUPPORT GROUP 5:45 p.m. the first Wednesday of each month. Sheridan Surgical room, 4510 Bailey Ave., Williamsville. Call 9084149

2 Amherst WNY FIBROMYALGIA

AND CHRONIC FATIGUE SUPPORT GROUP meets at the John James Audubon Library on the 1st Thursday of the month from 7-8:45 p.m. in Room 1. All sufferers and cargivers welcome. Discuss coping skills and new ways we can improve. Facebook egroup: WNY Fibromyalgia, Chronic Pain, and Chronic Fatigue. Library: 689-4922

2+ Cheektowaga T.O.P.S. MEETING, Thursdays at 9 a.m., St. Luke’s Lutheran Church, 900 Maryvale Dr. (corner of Union Road). Come for the love, support and friendship. For information, call Karen at 247-2334 2+ Buffalo GENTLE YOGA, 11 a.m. Thursdays, Tosh Collins Senior Center, 35 Cazenovia St. Bring a yoga mat. Info: 828-1093 2+ Akron T.O.P.S. CLUB Every Thursday, 5:30-6:45pm, at the Akron/ Newstead Senior Center, 5691 Cummings Rd. WE offer tools, programs, support, fellowship and recognition for healthy living and weight management. For information call Diane @ 716-542-4980

Lockport T.O.P.S. CLUB, weekly meetings 9 a.m. Saturdays at Odd Fellows and Rebekah Nursing Home, 104 Old Niagara Road. Call 433-1693

5+ Buffalo MEDITATION, 2:30 p.m., El Buen Amigo, 114 Elmwood Ave. Free every Sunday. Meditation unites with creative arts and pain management. Practitioner Sondra Holland welcomes people of all ages. Wear comfortable clothes. For information, Sondra: 9475092; store: 885-6343. 6+

Tonawanda TONAWANDA TOPS CLUB #50 Weekly meetings on Mondays, weigh-in 6pm/meeting starts at 6:25pm, Zion United Church Koenig & Parker Tonawanda; 912-6875

7 Amherst HOLIDAY CRAFT SALE

A variety of items for sale by more than 30 artists, 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Atrium of the Beechwood Homes, 2235 Millersport Hwy., Getzville

21 Buffalo HEADWAY SUPPORT GROUPS, 2635 Delaware Ave. For individuals who have sustained brain injuries as well as their families and caregivers; exchange information and resources, and find mutual support and encouragement. Peer Support (Suite B), first and third Tuesday, 6:30–8 p.m.; Caregivers Support (Suite B), first Tuesday, 6:30–8 p.m.; Women’s Survivors Support (Suite E), first Tuesday, 1–2:30 p.m. Info: 408-3100 or headwayofwny.org

7+ Farnham T.O.P.S. CLUB weekly meetings held Tuesdays at Holy Cross Lutheran Church, 10633 Church St., starting at 9 a.m. Call 934-9619. 7+

Tonawanda T.O.P.S. CLUB, weekly meetings on Tuesdays, 9:30 a.m. at Blessed Sacrament Parish, Claremont Avenue. For information, call 834-7992

7+ Buffalo TAI CHI: MOVING FOR BETTER BALANCE 10:30 a.m. every Tuesday, Tosh Collins Senior Center, 35 Cazenovia St. For more information, contact monicazucco@gmail.com.

7+ Niagara Falls T.O.P.S. CLUB, Enjoy light sitting and standing yoga at 5:30 p.m. before weigh in 6 p.m., and a brief interactive educational program at 7 p.m. Facebook: TOPS #173 Niagara Falls, NY. or call 5501232. Meets Tuesdays at Riverside Presbyterian Church, 815 - 84th St., Niagara Falls 7,

18 WNY RESPITE SERVICES for those with Alzheimer’s and related dementia on first Tuesday, 5:30 p.m. in Williamsville, and third Saturday, 11 a.m. in Amherst. Location info: (800) 272-3900.

Williamsville MCGUIRE GROUP MEMORY CARE SUPPORT GROUPS: General Support Group is second Wednesday, 3 p.m. at Harris Hill Nursing Facility, 2699 Wehrle Dr., Williamsville; Daughters’ Support Group, 5 p.m. Monthly support groups coordinated with the Alzheimer’s Association, with caregiving tips and coping mechanisms. For more information, call 632-3700 or visit mcguiregroup.com

11 Buffalo VICTORIAN BALL An

evening of Victorian dance and a great dinner. This year's theme of "Hands Across the Border" will celebrate the 150th Anniversary of the Canadian Confederation 6–11:30 pm at the Historic Hamlin House, 432 Franklin St. Contact Mike Dowling for details and registration forms at 634-7594 or mikevictordd5@aol.com.

East Aurora THE SALESMAN 2017 Oscar winner for Best Foreign Film, The Salesman is an Iranian drama about a married couple thrown into turmoil when the wife is assaulted in her new home. The husband is determined to find the perpetrator while she struggles to cope with post-trauma stress. $6 members, $8 non-members. 4 p.m., Roycroft Film Society, Parkdale School Auditorium, 141 Girard Ave., East Aurora; roycroftcampuscorp.com

Hamburg ALZHEIMER’S CARE-GIVER SUPPORT GROUP for males at Wesleyan Church, 4999 McKinley Pkwy. 2nd Tues. 626-0600, alz.org/wnyc

Orchard Park ALIENATED G R A N D P A R E N T S ANONYMOUS, INC., meetings 1 p.m. the second Tuesday of month, 4295 S. Buffalo St

November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 3

FOREVER YOUNG NOVEMBER CALENDAR 14

Depew BREAST CANCER NETWORK OF WNY Monthly meeting second Tuesday, 6 p.m., Bella Moglie Bldg., 3297 Walden Ave. Call 7060060 or visit bcnwny.org. Professional support group will be held at 8 pm

West Seneca FREE BEREAVEMENT SUPPORT SESSION, hosted by The McGuire Group for anyone coping with grief, sadness or loss at 5 pm at Seneca Health Care Center, 2987 Seneca St. Held

third Wednesday of the month. Those interested in attending can call 8280500.

Amherst WNY NATIONAL ALLIANCE ON MENTAL ILLNESS (NAMI) held third Wednesday of the month at 7 p.m. in two locations for families of people living with mental illness: St. Paul’s Evangelical Lutheran Church, 4007 Main St., Amherst. Southtowns: Lake Shore Behavioral Health, 3176 Abbott

17 Niagara Falls HOLIDAY GIFT

SHOW Kenan Arts Council hosts show, including 45 juried artisans and food and wine vendors. 11/17, 5-9 pm; 11/18, 10 am-5 pm; and 11/19, 11 am-5 pm. Kenan Center, 433 Locust St, Lockport. Admission is $4

Niagara Falls NIAGARA FALLS SINGLES SOCIAL CLUB An active 50-plus crowd. Dances on the third Friday every month at 7pm at the Buff Social Club, 2565 Young St,. Niagara Falls, NY. Cost: $6 (Members $4) Monthly activities include picnics, parties, games, door prizes, and 50/50 raffle. Info: 439-8387

17 Akron HEARTS AND HANDS Seeks volunteers to support caregivers of loved ones with early stages of dementia by providing an engaging, safe, and friendly environment to leave their loved one while taking care of their own medical, social, and emotional

needs. Hosted by the Wright Center, 11 Church Street, Village of Akron the third Friday each month from 1–4:30 p.m. Contact Eugene Abrahamson at 406-8311 ext. 102, e-mail volunteer@ heartsandhandsfia.org or hnhcares.org

17 Cheektowaga AUTUMN STAMP FESTIVAL A dozen stamp dealers and experienced collectors will be on hand, plus stamps, collectibles, door prizes. 10am–5pm, VFW Post, 2450 Walden Ave. Info: George Gates, 633-8358 21 Buffalo LGBTQ MEMORY LOSS CAREGIVERS PROGRAM: The Pride Center of Western New York offers the LGBTQ Memory Loss Caregivers Program providing support and education for people providing care for a person with Alzheimer’s Disease and other dementias. Third Tuesday each month at 5:30 p.m, Pride Center, 200 South Elmwood Ave., Buffalo, 8527743 or pridecenterwny.org

DANCE CALENDAR MONDAYS W. Seneca BALLROOM DANCING BY CAROL is a 6-week class @ St. David’s Church, 3951 Seneca St. 7:30–9:30 p.m. Info: 824-0504.

THURSDAYS Kenmore JACKIE’S THURSDAY NIGHT DANCES @ Brounshidle Post, 3354 Delaware Ave. Lessons: 7 p.m. Open dancing: 8 p.m. 691-8654.

Sloan CLOGGING LESSONS by Kickin’ Rhythm Cloggers, 6:30 p.m. @ St. Andrew’s Parish Hall, 111 Crocker St., Bldg. 1. kickinrhythmcloggers.com, (585) 457-4455.

Ongoing WNY BELLYDANCE CLASSES 5601891, nadiaibrahim.com.

TUESDAYS Buffalo LINDY FIX 8–10 p.m. @ Polish Cadets Hall, 927 Grant St. lindyfix.com, swingbuffalo.com. WEDNESDAYS N. Ton. DANCING WITH DOTTIE AND FRIENDS country-style line lessons, 7:30 p.m. @ Pendleton Center Meth. Church, 6864 Campbell Blvd. 688-6026 or 625-8306. Amherst AMHERST VICTORIAN DANCE SOCIETY Authentic music, dress and dance of Queen Victoria's time. New members and guests welcomed! 1st Wednesdays @ Buffalo Niagara Heritage Village in Amherst & 4th Wednesdays @ VFW Post in Village of Williamsville. 7:00 p.m. Info: Geraldine, 877-0222 or amherstvictoriandance.org 4

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

Kenmore JACKIE’S DANCE Monthly dance. Call 691-8654 for details. WNY BALLROOM SOCIAL DANCE, Argentine tango and belly dance instruction with Carol Allen; N. Collins and Amherst. 337-3092 or callen8801@aol.com. West Seneca BALLROOM DANCE classes @ 1761 Orchard Park Rd., 7713110, ballroomiliana.com. WNY DANCE W/ ERIN BAHN 9977190 or erinbahn.com. ARGENTINE TANGO IN BUFFALO Dancing & Classes traviswidricktango.com Contact Travis @ 517-7047

CROSSWORD 24. Kitchen cover 25. *"O my Luve is like a red, red rose..." 26. Nothing out of the ordinary 27. Alabama civil rights site 29. *"The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea in a beautiful pea-green boat..." 31. Never, or when these fly 32. Dancer's beat 33. "Encore!" 34. *"Death, be not proud, though some have called thee mighty and dreadful..." 36. Adele's "Rolling in the ____" 38. Young socialites, for short 42. Common thing

45. Brownish red 49. Campaign pro 51. *"Do not go gentle into that good night..." 54. Intestinal obstruction 56. Choose a president 57. Not in optimist's vocabulary? 58. Month of Purim 59. Ice on a window 60. Smell badly 61. High school musical club 62. "The Simpsons" palindrome 63. Get the picture 64. Of long ago 67. ____ out a living

THEME: FAMOUS POETS ACROSS 1. Skilled practice 6. Suitable 9. Golf hazard 13. Saint ____ of the Caribbean 14. Placeholder surname 15. Strapping 16. Whatsoever 17. Ever, to a poet 18. Tree common to Pacific Northwest 19. *"O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done..." 21. *"Come live with me and be my love..." 23. Center of activity 24. Romanov ruler 25. It's wheels go round and round 28. Place for a hero 30. Between hexad and octad 35. Like a hand-me-down 37. Be inclined 39. Muralist Rivera 40. Hold sway 41. Strongboxes 43. F.B.I. operative 44. One who names 46. Justice's garb 47. "Wheel of Fortune" choice 48. Swell or very good 50. Antonym of "is" 52. Next to nothing 53. Metal leaf 55. Ship pronoun

57. *"'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves..." 61. Study of rocks 65. Bye, to FranĂ ois Hollande 66. Electric swimmer 68. ____-Goldwyn-Mayer 69. *Pablo Neruda had two: a pen and a given 70. Tiny guitar 71. SAG member 72. "Star ____" 73. Observe 74. Feed the fire DOWN 1. Eagle's talons 2. ____ Bader Ginsburg 3. Berry high in antioxidants 4. Foul matter 5. Ancient rabbinic writings 6. Port in Yemen 7. *"Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary..." 8. 4 in a school year 9. *Dickinson: "Tell all the truth but ____ it slant" 10. Make over 11. Not many 12. Cremation pile 15. Like prison cell windows 20. Aids and ____ 22. Expression of pleasure

The solution for this monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s puzzle can be found on page 36. November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 5

LIFE & LEISURE

Thanks for the Memories Building Your Legacy BY GARY KAYE

n recent weeks, as the tragedies of hurricanes Harvey and Irma devastated Texas and Florida, over and over again we heard many of the victims say the first thing they did was to try to get the family photographs to safety. That may be easy if you’ve got a couple of albums. But many of the folks I know have baskets or boxes or closets filled with old photographs, videos, movies, and slides. I have an old jeweler’s safe stuffed with them, and that’s probably only about a quarter of what I’ve got. Some of them are my father’s home movies dating back to the 1930s. Others are faded black and white pictures on cardboard from my mother’s farm dating back to the turn of the last century. But it’s important not just to save them, but also to give them context. Notes, descriptions, names, a non-volatile storage medium like a Perfection V600. Or you can call dates, places CD or DVD or a solid-state drive. I on a service such as ScanMyPhotos. also strongly suggest sending them to com, which can transfer photos, videos When my brother-in-law passed a cloud storage service so that there’s even old 16mm movies. away a year ago, he left behind albums Now you have all of these treasures always access no matter where you are. and boxes of photos, but there were There are lots of ways to save these saved for posterity. But, does posterity no notes or references, so sadly most care? Your kids are unlikely to go assets. You can scan hundreds of were chucked, which was a loss for snapshots quickly with the Epson through those pictures or movies, even my wife and my kids. The first step to FastFoto (model FF-640). If you have with notes. So, ask yourself, what do I protect these memories is to have them larger format pictures or slides you can really want my kids to know about my digitized, then store them someplace use a flatbed scanner such as the Epson family, my background, and my life? safe. I suggest putting them on both

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

The key to creating a visual legacy is to start with a story and worry about the assets later. According to Jack Giarraputo, the chairman and founder of UrLife, it’s all about the story. He should know. Before starting this service to bring Hollywood quality movies to your memories, he was a successful producer, making some thirty movies including those with Adam Sandler such as Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore. So why go from Hollywood mogul to crafting home movies? I retired to watch my kids grow up, and as I was the one now following them around with the camera phone, once I captured all the footage, I realized there was no quality option to organize and tell the stories of what I’d just captured. It was all do-it-yourself or robots or algorithms. So, being a storyteller myself, I would film the trip or the holiday and give it to the editors that I used to work with and pay them a couple of hundred bucks to do a little moonlighting. We came up with a really nice short-form highquality storytelling package that now organizes all the memories and has a story and context for each one that you could look back at ten or twenty years from now. And it’s just amazing—like you are reliving the day. Giarraputo puts it succinctly, “There’s nothing more important than saving memories, and that’s why I started this company.” Many Baby Boomers and seniors have hundreds or thousands of photos, slides, and reels of movies, and boxes of videotape. We asked Giarraputo how someone could put that all together so it will be meaningful to their kids and prompt them to actually watch. We spoke with him about creating a visual legacy. He says there are three ways to organize memories so they will be meaningful. He calls them “Back, Buckets, and Babies.” “Back is looking backward from today, the past. The second is bucket list. Everyone talks about ‘what’s on your bucket list,’ but now we can talk about what’s in your bucket. How many of those things have you done and what’s in the bucket.”

LIFE & LEISURE In short, he suggests that when you go on that next bucket list trip, you think about how you would make a memorable movie with it. Not just the places, but also the experiences. For example, at Jerusalem’s Temple Wall, take not just pictures of the wall, but pictures of you and your family at the wall. Then narrative, what did you feel in seeing this, how did the experience affect you? Then he says you’ll have a bunch of things in your bucket that you’ll be proud to show people. The third item is babies: “If you don’t see enough of your grandchildren, or you live geographically apart, this is a great gift to give to your son or daughter, because they get to curate the baby’s memories, or the toddler or the youngster, and then you get to see it. So, this really started when I did this for my kids for Halloween, Christmas, whatever my grandmother couldn’t be at, and I would send them to her and she would just watch them forty times and show them to anyone who

came in the house. She felt like she was watching the kids grow up, even though she was three thousand miles away. When it comes to looking backward, you have far more visual assets. So, how do you put that together to make a meaningful legacy? “There are lots of services and devices that will take your stuff and put it onto digital storage. I think it’s great because it will enable it to not deteriorate. That’s where we come in; because once you have it digitized you can call us up. We’re very high touch, we talk to people, and we talk about a story, and we write down the story of your life and whatever you want to emphasize. Then we look for the media to support that from your archives, and we put together a really nice documentary of your life. It could be five minutes, it could be fifteen minutes or longer. We just charge as much as we have to pay our editors and keep the lights on; we’re not trying to rip anyone off, we just think it’s a good business to be in.

If I could, I would tell everyone to go backward and do your origin story, where did the family come from, how did they get here, did they come over on the boat and go through Ellis Island? And that sort of gets you up to date. Then, going forward, you document it all in shorter bursts.” Giarraputo says there’s been a revolution in the way we capture these memories. It used to be you needed to spend a lot of money on fancy cameras, film, developing, etc. But now just about everyone has a smartphone, so you can capture those memories without much effort at all. “It’s high def and it’s awesome. It’s a film and video camera. It’s amazing and it’s in our pockets. Going forward, we’re going to be capturing everything, so we want people to organize the stuff as they go along so they don’t end up with a big unwieldy pile of stuff the way we have it now.” Giarraputo says that when creating someone’s story it’s not necessary to have all the elements yourself. You

can find video, stills, and newspaper headlines about almost any event you may want to reference on the Internet, and he will integrate those into your story. Of course, that also extends to music that conveyed the era as well. My one additional suggestion is to put you into your story. Get in front of a camera, talk about your experiences, and don’t cover it all up. Let your kids and grandkids not only see you but also hear your emotions, your facial expressions as you talk about the most important events in your life. Make that a part of the backbone of your story. Remember, the way to move this from a pile of pictures to a living memory is to tell your story. FY Gary Kaye, Chief Content Officer of tech50plus.com, is an award-winning journalist who has been covering technology since IBM introduced its first personal computer in 1981.

MEDICAL

Aging with independence – live life on your terms. There’s no place like home. But sometimes for older adults and their caregivers, managing how to stay home can be difﬁcult. Complete Senior Care (CSC), a Program of All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly (PACE) – can cover programs and services traditionally provided by Medicare and Medicaid. To be eligible, you must be 55 years of age or older, qualify for a nursing home level of care, and reside in Niagara County.

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Complete Senior Care is a Program of All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly (PACE). Members may be fully and personally liable for the costs of unauthorized or out-of-PACE program agreement services. To be eligible, you must be 55 years or older, have Medicare and/or Medicaid and/or be willing to pay privately, have medical needs that would qualify you for nursing home level of care, and need the long-term care services of the plan for more than 120 days.

www.medicalradiobuffalo.com November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 7

HOME & GARDEN

The Color Purple in the Fall Garden

That was the proper dosage! (Thank goodness for NSAIDS!) Autumn crocuses come in violet, lilac pink, violet, and pink.

everal people have commented on the various purple flowers that abound in my fall garden. I love to watch people walking by our home. Many stop to look and enjoy. Some people walk straight ahead with nary a glance. I recently reread Alice Walker’s Pulitzer Prize winning novel and was struck by the coincidence. The Color Purple seems appropriate! Shug, one of the characters, says, “I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.” It comes out easily. It likes full sun and orange. Asters do best when but does well in partial shade as well. pruned back early in the season. It What more could one want of a plant? makes them bushier. They also do better when divided about every three years. (By the way, someone recently asked me if the asters were mums. The answer is “No, but all mums are asters.”)

I also grew gomphrena, an annual that is also called globe amaranth. The flower bracts (actually colored leaves) are roundish balls. The actual yellow flowers are seldom noticed, as they are very tiny and shaped like a horn. I shake out the seeds into the garden at the end of the season and they come up as fillers the next year.

CAROL ANN HARLOS So, let’s take a look. There is a swath of the hardy geranium ‘Roxanne.’ This perennial plant blooms throughout most of the summer and well into late autumn. One simply needs to cut it back periodically when it becomes floppy and messy. I love the violet-blue flowers. If you look closely enough, you can see the white throat in each flower. Because this plant spreads so easily, it winds its way through other plants in the garden. Too much of it?

The autumn asters are another perennial that brightens up any autumn garden. Aster frikartii and sharp-leafed aster are delightful in my fall garden. Their flowers remind me of stars. I especially love the fact that honeybees, butterflies, and bumblebees love their nectar. (See if you can find some bees in the pictures!) Although my asters happen to be shades of purple, one can also purchase asters in white, red, pink,

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You may also see asters growing in fields. In Western New York this would be the New-England Aster, which is a truly magnificent “weed.” If the conditions are right it can grow up to six feet tall! And then there are the autumn crocuses, which are related to lilies rather than the crocuses that brighten our gardens in spring. In the spring the corms of autumn crocus send up long strap shaped leaves. These gradually disappear which means that the gardener needs to exercise care when digging in the garden in the season. I certainly have forgotten about them several times and have dug right through a bulb in midsummer! The autumn crocus has a history as a treatment for gout, which it apparently helps. One would ingest the bulbs until one became quite ill.

Lastly, I want to share Verbena bonariensis another annual that I grew from seed many years ago. It shows up in various places in the fall garden. The square stems each hold three flowers at the top. It is listed as both a perennial and as an invasive species in some parts of the world, but here it simply forms seeds and dies. FY

Thank you for sharing your garden questions and comments. I can be reached at caharlos@verizon.com or at herbgardener.net

ARTS

November Theater Preview BY DONNA HOKE

The Crucible Kavinoky Theatre By Arthur Miller Director: Bob Waterhouse Cast: Shelby Ehrenreich, Adriano Gatto, Aleks Malejs, Gerry Maher, Adam Yellen, John Fredo, Leah Berst, Emma English, Mikyla Fisher and Christine Turturo, Dan Greer, Eileen Dugan Prevailing wisdom is that Arthur Miller wrote The Crucible’s story of the Salem witch hunts as an allegory for the House Un-Americans Activities Committee (HUAC) in the 1950s, a crisis triggered by the Soviet testing of atomic weapons, which led to an insistence on a show of patriotism at home and the persecution of anyone with perceived links to alleged traitors. “Today, as North Korea tests its nuclear weaponry, we see a similar insistence on patriotism and the instinct to find scapegoats on whom to blame loss— loss of jobs, national security, world status, and so on,” notes director Bob Waterhouse. “Miller was as acutely aware when he wrote the play of Salem’s similarities to Nazi Germany, when similar dissatisfactions, once harnessed, became collaboration with the state: neighbor turned on neighbor, exercising an instinct that is sadly beyond the

historical confines of time and place. So, at this point in our history, I don’t think it helps an audience to seek in the play an allegory for McCarthyism, any more than it helps us to think of the tragedy as something peculiar to the Salem of 1692. You don’t need a Nazi rally to see how easily humans revel in the opportunity to blame others for their woes, or simply to exert a natural appetite for cruelty; witness seemingly intelligent adults savaging one another online, or otherwise upright citizens associating their lack of happiness with this or that minority. “The Crucible is a terrifying play,” continues Waterhouse. “There is an evil at the heart of it and it lies not in the supernatural but in human nature. The evil driving the play then comes from the ease with which dissatisfactions become the need to manipulate or destroy others. The Salem community drove nineteen people—friends and neighbors—to the gallows; no one was safe until the village itself was more sickened by the hangings than the desires that led to them. The judges pursued the trials with implacable efficiency, imposing a bureaucratic face on a basic human drive to blame others for one’s woes and to collude with the dominant mob mentality.” The two poles at either end of

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The Crucible are sex and guilt, in the form of seventeen-year-old Abigail Williams and her married lover, John Proctor, the story’s tragic hero, who sacrifices himself in the belief that he can atone for his infidelity and purge his community of its affliction. But “this production will try to shuck the play’s associations with both the ‘Puritan period’ and the 1950s, and take a more a-historical view. What, at bottom, are the motives that drive these characters?” asks Waterhouse. “Remove witchcraft from the plot and you are left with a tragedy of regrettably human proportions. These are ordinary people who take their neighbors to the gallows.” The Crucible opens at Kavinoky November 3 (kavinokytheatre.com, 8817668).

come together in a Louisiana beauty salon and forge a fiercely loving, loyal, and sometimes-crazy tribe, steadfastly seeing one another through the happiness and sorrows of their lives, says LoConti. Though many are familiar with the Julia Roberts/Sally Field movie, LoConti thinks the film, despite terrific performances, lost the core of the story. “In the play,” she explains, “all of the scenes take place in the beauty shop. The location represents a haven where these women share the most intimate and defining issues of their lives. There are no male characters, precisely because at its core, it is about the fellowship—odd word in this instance—and support they derive from one another within the walls of the shop. [Film] choices to move scenes out of the shop and [include] male characters weaken the message of Steel Magnolias Harling’s play.” Desiderio’s LoConti loved watching the By Robert Harling relationships develop among the actors Director: Kyle LoConti Cast: Lisa Ludwig, Justyne Harris and characters as rehearsals progressed, , Maureen Anne Porter, Bethany and also felt some kinship to her own growing up. “My mother grew Burrows, Lisa Hinca Mary McMahon up in a small town in Arkansas, not too far north of Harling’s imaginary A cast of six women, and only six location of Chinquapin Parrish, women, is a rarity onstage, but Robert Louisiana,” she says. “Across from my Harling’s Steel Magnolias, based on real women in his life, has endured; grandmother’s house was a tiny pink the thirtieth anniversary of its opening building that housed Doris’ Beauty was this past March. “The playwright Salon. I have firsthand recollections of captured the authentic voices o f these my own ‘steel magnolias’ and felt their women. Each one is unique, but they presence throughout this process. I are all smart, loving and loyal, and shared photos and stories of them with this cast. As soon as Maureen wickedly funny,” offers director Kyle Porter started speaking Clairee’s lines, LoConti in explanation for the play’s all I could hear was my Aunt Betty longevity. “Harling has crafted a story that brings the characters from the Jo. This connection made the journey depths of despair to outright hilarity. sweeter.” When an audience gives over to the Steel Magnolias runs through story, they take this roller coaster ride December 3 on Thursdays and Saturdays along with the characters.” at 7:30 p.m., and Sundays either In short, Steel Magnolias is the stor at 2:30 p.m. or 7:30 p.m. .mybobbyjs. y of six strong Southern women who com/desiderio-s-dinner-theatre for details.

ARTS Glengarry Glen Ross Road Less Traveled Productions By David Mamet Director: Scott Behrend Cast: Matt Witten, Dave Mitchell, Pat Moltane, Dave Marciniak, Dave Hayes, Steve Brachmann, Mike Dugan Road Less Traveled Productions artistic director Scott Behrend had been considering the David Mamet classic, Glengarry Glen Ross, for the past few years, but recent American politics made now an even better time for this timeless play that premiered in 1984. “It’s a play about con men,” Behrend says. “It’s about desperation and betrayal in life and in capitalism.” Behrend directed Glengarry his senior year at Syracuse University, and it not only challenged him, but also cemented his desire to direct post-graduation, a decision that ultimately led to the founding of Road Less Traveled. He also had the good fortune to assistant direct The Country House world premiere with Dan Sullivan, who directed the 2012 Broadway production with Al Pacino.

“I was able to pick Dan’s brain about his process during [The Country House] experience, which was great!” Behrend says. “This is one of the few things I have ever revisited and I’m excited about tackling Mamet again. I directed Race in 2014 and that was great fun. Glengarry Glen Ross is so timeless; the human dynamics he was wrestling with 1984 are just as riveting today.” Putting together a collection of men can be difficult in Western New York, where actors of a certain demographic aren’t exactly plentiful, but Behrend has assembled a stellar cast that includes RLTP ensemble members, as well as relative newcomers to the RLTP stage. “I wanted to direct and revisit this based on my college experience, but I also love the characters and the play,” Behrend says. “It’s some of the best dialogue ever. I’m excited to hear it out loud and hopefully create an electric/crackling atmosphere that will leave everyone gasping for air a bit…” (Artie Award-winner Matt Witten gets to deliver the delicious “Coffee is for closers.”)

Though RLTP primarily focuses on newer work, Behrend wanted to—as he did with Sam Shepard’s True West last season—feature a modern classic that could showcase Ensemble members and “hopefully create a definitive production in Buffalo. Now that we’ve been around for fourteen years, I’m interested in exploring some of our previous American playwrights in more depth.”

Glengarry Glenn Ross wraps up at Road Less Traveled Productions November 19 (roadlesstraveledproductions.com; 6293069). Playwright Donna Hoke writes about theater for Buffalo Spree and Forever Young.

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Also Playing (in order of closing) • American Repertory Theater’s Stupid Fucking Bird closes November 11 (artofwny.org, 697-0837). • Visiting Mr. Green closes at Jewish Repertory Theatre November 12 (jewishrepertorytheatre.org; 688-4033). • Glengarry Glenn Ross wraps up at Road Less Traveled Productions November 19 (roadlesstraveledproductions.com; 629-3069).

OPENING THIS MONTH • MusicalFare opens Violet November 1 (musicalfare.com, 839-8540). • The adaptation of Maeve Binchy’s Minding Frankie opens at Irish Classical Theatre November 3 (irishclassicaltheatre.com, 853-4282). • Painting Churches begins a limited engagement at O’Connell and Company November 9 (oconnellandcompany.com, 848-0800). • Lancaster Opera House presents South Pacific beginning November 10 (lancopera.org, 683-1776). • Cinderella opens at New Phoenix November 17 (newphoenixtheatre. org, 853-1334). • Road Less Traveled Productions presents It’s A Wonderful Life: A Radio Play, beginning November 30 (roadlesstraveledproductions. com; 629-3069).

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ARTS

Holiday Movie Highlights BY CHRISTOPHER SCHOBERT

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Some major films arrived in September and October—real-life tennis drama Battle of the Sexes, longawaited sci-fi sequel Blade Runner 2049, the Buffalo-shot Marshall. But November, December, and January are even busier. The list below offers a diverse range of genres and topics, and there are plenty more coming soon, as well. (Opening dates are subject to change.) For Younger Grandkids Coco: The latest from Pixar (Finding Dory, Inside Out) takes an aspiring musician through the Land of the Dead. (November 24) Ferdinand: Wrestling star John Cena voices Ferdinand, a bull with a big heart, in this animated family film. (December 15) Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle: The 1990s favorite Jumanji was one of Robin Williams’s biggest hits. This reboot of the film about a magical board game moves things into a video game setting and stars Dwayne Johnson. (December 22) For Older Grandkids Thor: Ragnarok: The third film centered on Thor, the Marvel Comics favorite played by Chris Hemsworth, looks to be the most fun in the series. This time, the cast includes Mark Ruffalo’s Hulk, as well as Cate Blanchett as a villainess. (November 3) Daddy’s Home 2: The Will FerrellMark Wahlberg comedy Daddy’s Home was a pleasant surprise in 2015. The sequel adds John Lithgow and Mel Gibson as the fathers to Ferrell and Wahlberg, respectively. (November 10) Star Wars: The Last Jedi: There’s no doubt that the eighth Star Wars

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

Kristen Wiig and Matt Damon in Downsizing Photo courtesy of TIFF

episode is the year’s most anticipated film. The follow-up to The Force Awakens sees Rey (Daisy Ridley) continue her journey under the tutelage of Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill). (December 15) For the Oscar Handicapper Darkest Hour: Gary Oldman plays Winston Churchill in this entertaining World War II drama. I caught the film at the 2017 Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF), and I can assure you the buzz surrounding the performance is accurate—Oldman has never been better. (November 24; limited release) Call Me By Your Name: Few films in 2017 are more moving that this story of the affair between the teenage son of an American professor and the graduate student who spends a summer with the family. It was a TIFF highlight. (November 24; limited release) The Post: A mighty trio—director Steven Spielberg and stars Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep—team up for a drama about the Pentagon Papers cover-up. (January 12)

For a Post-film Conversation Wonder Wheel: Another year, another film from Woody Allen. Kate Winslet stars in this drama set at Coney Island during the 1950s. (December 1; limited) Chappaquiddick: This period drama about the scandal involving a young Ted Kennedy is directed by Rochester’s John Curran. (December 8) Downsizing: It’s difficult to know what to make of Alexander Payne’s latest, which stars Matt Damon as a man who takes advantage of a new procedure that can shrink humans. (I saw it at TIFF.) It’s a strange but compelling mix of comedy, drama and science fiction. (December 22) FY Christopher Schobert is the former managing editor of Forever Young. He is a film critic for The Buffalo News and other outlets, and writes a monthly film screenings column for Buffalo Spree.

ARTS

Frozen Pepper Favorites BY HILARY DIODATO

ometimes, dear readers, you want to find a loophole—one that makes your cooking fresh tasting, less expensive, and vibrant. I thought for sure that my recent obsession with gigantic frozen bags of freshly cut and frozen bell peppers and onions was going to lend itself to more delightful recipes than I could count. Where had frozen peppers been all my life, I wondered? No more paying three bucks a pepper in winter at the grocery store!

Reality set in after some mishaps with grilling and marinating— frozen peppers aren’t as versatile as I thought. However, with the proper applications, you can load your cold weather meals up with zesty, vitamin-C packed goodness. I have provided two very different recipes: a stuffed pepper soup that I guarantee tastes just like a classic meat-andrice stuffed pepper, but with half the time, and a pepper jelly that will set your holiday entertaining on fire, in more ways than one! Stuffed Pepper Soup Yield: 8 servings For flexibility, I have provided both stovetop and slow cooker directions. Feel free to use leftover rice of any kind in place of basmati. Brown rice would also make a healthy stand-in for white, and would not drastically alter the flavor of this robust soup. Ingredients 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 tablespoon minced garlic 1 pound lean ground beef 1 1/2 teaspoons salt 1 teaspoon dried oregano 1 teaspoon dried basil 3/4 teaspoon ground black pepper 2 29-oz. cans tomato sauce 3 cups frozen peppers and onions, roughly chopped* 2 cups beef broth 1 cup rice (preferably basmati), cooked. *I recommend thawing slightly to make chopping easier.

Directions In a large sauté pan, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the garlic, and cook for 30 seconds. Next, add the beef, ½ teaspoon salt, and ½ teaspoon pepper. Brown the meat, breaking up into large chunks. Drain the beef and set aside. In a large stockpot, combine all other ingredients, except for the rice. Bring the mixture to a boil over high heat, and then reduce the heat to low and cover. Simmer for 1 hour to let the flavors meld. Fifteen minutes before serving, stir in the cooked rice. Alternate slow cooker directions: complete step one as written, then combine all ingredients (except for the rice) in the slow cooker. Cook on low for 4-6 hours. Add rice 15 minutes before serving.

Directions Place the peppers and onions, pepper flakes, vinegar, salt, and half of the sugar in a small saucepan. Bring the mixture to a boil over medium heat, stirring occasionally. Add the pectin and remaining sugar to the mixture, stirring well to evenly incorporate. Allow to boil for 2 minutes.

Remove from the heat and allow to cool. Serve immediately, or pour into jars and refrigerate. FY Hilary Diodato is passionate about cooking and saving money and writes a bi-monthly column for Forever Young.

Spicy Pepper and Onion Jam Yield: 1 pint jar You’ll be surprised how quickly this jam comes together using frozen peppers and onions plus some pantry staples. A classic use is to serve this jam over cream cheese, but I’d challenge you to use it as a glaze for ham, or even with cocktail meatballs. Ingredients 1 cup frozen peppers and onions, thawed and minced 1 teaspoon red pepper flakes 4 tablespoons white wine vinegar ¼ teaspoon salt 3/4 cups sugar, divided 2 teaspoons pectin November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 13

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AM. LEG. MCKEEVER POST 1770 South Park Ave., Buffalo 7:30 p.m................... 822-6400 O’BRIEN HALL Lafayette at Grant, Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 885-2469 ASSUMPTION PARISH 435 Amherst St., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 876-1038 KENMORE K OF C 1530 Kenmore Ave., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 875-5780 OUR LADY HELP OF CHRISTIANS 4125 Union Rd., Cheektowaga 7:30 p.m.................... 634-3420 SENECA GAMING AND ENTERTAINMENT 11099 Route 5, Irving 7 & 10:30 p.m........... 549-4389 ST. ALOYSIUS GONZAGA 157 Cleveland Dr., Cheektowaga 7:30 p.m.................... 833-1715 ST. KATHERINE DREXEL 122 Shiller St., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 895-6813 ST. ANDREW’S CHURCH 1525 Sheridan Dr., Kenmore 7:30 p.m.................... 873-6716 LAKE ERIE CLUB 3200 S. Park Ave., Lackawanna 7:15 p.m.................... 825-9870

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DALE ASSOCIATION CENT. 33 Ontario St., Lockport 7 p.m......................... 433-1886 SOUTH BYRON VFC Rte. 237, South Byron 7:30 p.m........... 585-548-2611 SANBORN VFC 5811 Buffalo St., Sanborn 7:45 p.m.................... 731-4616 MILLGROVE VFC 11621 Genesee St., Alden 7:45 p.m.................... 937-7612 GASPORT CHEMICAL HOSE 8412 State St., Gasport 7:30 p.m.................... 772-7751 OUR LADY OF PERP. HELP 115 O’Connell St., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 852-2671 ST. STANISLAUS RCC 123 Townsend St., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 849-4980 ST. PHILIP THE APOSTLE 950 Lossen Rd., Cheektowaga 7:30 p.m.................... 668-3344

SATURDAY ST. AMELIA’S RCC 2999 Eggert Rd., Tonawanda 1 p.m......................... 836-0011 ASSUMPTION PARISH 435 Amherst St., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 876-1038

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Bingo Calendar BLESSED TRINITY 317 Leroy Ave., Buffalo 8 p.m......................... 833-0301 ST. JOHN XXIII 1 Arcade St., W. Seneca 7 p.m......................... 823-1090 CORPUS CHRISTI CLUB 165 Sears St., Buffalo 2 p.m......................... 892-0469 INFANT OF PRAGUE 921 Cleveland Dr., Cheektowaga 7:15 p.m.................... 634-3660 ST. ALOYSIUS GONZAGA 157 Cleveland Dr., Cheektowaga 1 p.m......................... 833-1715 VILLA MARIA COLLEGE 240 Pine Ridge Rd., Cheektowaga 1 p.m......................... 896-0700 LANCASTER ELKS 1478 33 Legion Parkway, Lancaster 1 p.m......................... 685-1478 OUR LADY OF POMPEII 129 Laverack, Lancaster 7 p.m. (1st Sat.)........ 683-6522 O’HARA BOOSTER CLUB 39 O’Hara Rd., Tonawanda 7:30 p.m.. 695-2600 ext. 326 SENECA GAMING AND ENTERTAINMENT 11099 Route 5, Irving 1, 7, & 10:30 p.m...... 549-4389

ST. ANDREW CHURCH 111 Crocker St., Sloan 7:30 p.m.................... 892-0425 PALLOTTINE FATHERS 3452 N. Falls Blvd., Wheatfield 7 p.m......................... 694-4313 SOUTH WILSON VFC 4193 Chestnut Rd., Wilson 7:30 p.m.................... 751-6079 CARDINAL O’HARA HIGH 39 O’Hara Rd., Tonawanda 7:30 p.m. 695-2600 ext. 326 CORPUS CHRISTI CHURCH 199 Clark St., Buffalo 2 p.m......................... 896-1050 OUR LADY OF BISTRICA 1619 Abbott Rd., Lackawanna 7:15 p.m.................... 822-0818 BUFFALO GAY BINGO/ AIDS PLUS FUND OF WNY Westminster Church, 724 Delaware Ave., Buffalo 7 p.m (2nd Sat.)......... 882-7840

SUNDAY ST. ANTHONY OF PADUA 160 Court St., Buffalo 2 p.m......................... 854-2563 ST. LEO THE GREAT 885 Sweet Home Rd., Amherst 2 p.m......................... 835-8905

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ST. JOHN XXIII 1 Arcade St., W. Seneca 2 p.m......................... 823-1090 OUR LADY OF THE SACRED HEART 3148 Abbott Rd., O. Park 2 p.m......................... 824-2935 KENMORE K OF C 1530 Kenmore Ave., Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 875-5780 ST. BERNARD’S CHURCH Clinton @ S. Ogden, Buffalo 7:30 p.m.................... 822-8856 OUR LADY HELP OF CHRISTIANS 4125 Union Rd., Cheektowaga 7 p.m......................... 634-3420 SENECA GAMING AND ENTERTAINMENT 11099 Route 5, Irving 1 & 7 p.m.................. 549-4389 DELEVAN VFC N. Main St., Delevan 7 p.m......................... 492-1910 ST. ANDREW’S CHURCH 1525 Sheridan Dr., Kenmore 7 p.m......................... 873-6716 FATHER BAKER K OF C 2838 S. Park Ave., Lackawanna 7:15 p.m.................... 825-5150 OUR LADY OF POMPEII 129 Laverack, Lancaster 7 p.m......................... 683-6522

CARDINAL O’HARA HIGH 39 O’Hara Rd., Tonawanda 1 p.m....... 695-2600 ext. 326 LOCKPORT ELKS LODGE 41 6791 N. Canal Rd., Lockport 7 p.m......................... 434-2798 PVT. LEONARD POST 2450 Walden, Cheektowaga 7:15 p.m..................684-43710

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November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 17

COVER

Stay Safe and Independent in Your Home From Health System Services

ntering your golden years can bring some of the most enjoyable moments of your life, watching children grow into adults, using the tools you’ve helped teach them to build lives of their own. Weddings, retirement, grandchildren. With that joy comes inevitable new challenges. At Health System Services, we believe in offering Western New Yorkers common sense solutions to overcome the challenges presented by limited mobility. That’s because you deserve to continue celebrating life’s milestones the way you always have, in your own home, surrounded by its lifetime of memories—and with true independence.

Photos by kc kratt 18

Bathroom safety Statistics consistently show the room in your home where a dangerous fall is likeliest to happen is the bathroom. That’s why it’s the first place you should concentrate when evaluating how to address the challenges of limited mobility. A slippery or wet floor can make

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

stepping over a traditional bathtub perilous. For seniors, there are easy and affordable alternatives that do not require a full-scale bathroom remodeling project. Walk-in shower stalls or bathtubs are a safe alternative to a traditional bathtub and do not affect the aesthetic appearance of your home. For seniors reliant on a wheelchair, a roll-in shower stall can mean the difference between bathing without the assistance of an inhome healthcare aide or family member. For seniors who still feel comfortable with their traditional step-in tub, there are a number of simpler amenities such as a removable shower seat or handrails to make showering safer.

Navigating the stairs After the bathroom, the most challenging part of your home can be negotiating stairs. What used to be a benefit—a second-floor bedroom away from the hustle and bustle of an active home—can begin to feel like a chore, or worse, an impossibility.

COVER You don’t have to feel like a prisoner on the first floor of your home. An American-made Bruno stairlift is a safe alternative that means you can enjoy all parts of your home and spend nights sleeping where you’re meant to, in the master bedroom. Stairlifts can have additional benefits. Is your laundry located down a steep set of basement stairs? Is your home a split-level with stairs to navigate when you walk in the door? Health System Services can install straight-line or custom-built curved stairlifts that will fit any staircase. They feature retractable seats so they do not block the staircase. They are battery-operated and only require a standard outlet to function. Ramps and platform lifts Stairlifts can help you continue to enjoy your whole home. Unfortunately, outdoor stairs present a different challenge. That’s why Health System Services offers a full

complement of weatherproof ramps and vertical platform lifts to help you when you’re coming and going. National companies offer a onesize-fits-all solution. Because we’re a local company, we understand the challenges a Western New York winter can present. That’s why our outdoor ramps are designed with an aluminum mesh deck that is designed for withstanding snow and ice. They can be shoveled, scraped, or treated with salt without fear or rusting or degrading. We also understand every home is different. A suburban home with a spacious lawn can fit a ramp without a problem. In urban neighborhoods where that kind of space doesn’t exist, a vertical platform lift can offer a better solution. Both can be installed with relative ease and minimal aesthetic impact on your home’s exterior. For homes that have a threshold step from outside, we also offer a large number of portable one-step ramps,

many of which are so unobtrusive they appear the same as a welcome mat. Active seniors have places to go and people to see! Getting in and out of your home shouldn’t be a chore. General home modification Those are some of the larger projects to help make your home safer and easier to navigate. But there are also a number of small modifications that can help as well. A short flight of steps often don’t have a handrail, but even two or three stairs can present a problem. The same can be said for toilets. Wall-mounted handrails and grab bars are a convenient and affordable solution. There are dozens of small tweaks along the same lines that our expert consultants can spot—problems you might not even realize you can solve in every room of your home. That’s why, as a local company, Health System Services can visit your home and identify potential problems

for you. These consultations are free and solutions can be identified for seniors on any budget. We offer personalized service, a variety of financing options, and we stand behind every product we sell. As a senior citizen, we understand you deserve to be able to enjoy your family and retirement with the same comfort and independence you’ve always known. At Health System Services, we are here to serve you. That’s our commitment to you, and to our community. About Health System Services Founded in 1996, Health System Services is committed to helping families provide the best and most compassionate care for their loved ones. With a focus on customer service, our consultative process has helped countless people enjoy the freedom of their homes in safety and comfort. For more information, visit YourModifiedHome.com or call us at 1-888-638-4477. FY

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FEATURE

Foster Grandparents

Left to Right: Program Specialist Sarah Bartkowiak, 25 Year Foster Grandparent Bessie Robinson, and Foster Grandparent Program Coordinator Erin Pustulka

BY ANTHONY CHABALA Enterprise Charter School Site Liaison Lee Ann Kelly, along with the volunteers from her site. (Irine Berry, Nancy Krug, Jacqueline Daniels, Lee Ann Kelly, Doris Wallace, Brenda Sapp, Patricia Ridgeway)

nce in a while, a program comes along that is truly a win-win-win. Catholic Charities of Buffalo Foster Grandparent Program is just that. The program began in 1965 when a group of social scientists, driven by Lyndon B. Johnson’s “War on Poverty,” attempted to find creative ways for adults to earn extra income while benefitting the community. Well, it worked! The program has local seniors who meet specific criteria go into local schools and assist teachers educate students on all topics (often on a one on one basis). Today, WNY’s division of the program is run through Catholic Charities of Buffalo, and thanks to its Foster Grandparents and highly motivated staff, the program is a raging success. two student populations benefit Erin Pustulka, coordinator of the but the opposite happened!” exudes immensely from what the Foster Foster Grandparent Program, could Pustulka. Grandparents have to offer. The “Grandparents” work not be prouder of what the program The students benefit from the with students who have special or has become. “What’s amazing is one on one attention the Foster exceptional needs. Common sense that people assumed that the senior Grandparents provide. According tells us that this is likely a challenging citizens acting as Foster Grandparents to Pustulka, “Some students react role, but history has proven that these would be run over by the students,

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

differently when you take them away from their normal groups and have them bond with an adult. The students are much calmer and eager to learn when this new person shows them so much attention.” Additionally, the teachers are thrilled to have an extra person able to help provide instruction. Last year, more than 100 Foster Grandparents donated over 90,000 hours of service to Buffalo’s students.To celebrate incredible accomplishments like this, Catholic Charities of Buffalo hosts a yearly recognition event where individuals are acknowledged for their dedication to the program. Awards for Years of Service are given out for those Grandparents who have served one, three, five, seven, ten, fifteen, twenty, and twenty-five years of service. Buffalo’s Bessie Robinson celebrated her twenty-fifth year as a Foster Grandparent at the ceremony. The Henry Osinski Community Service Award is specifically granted to a community member who has shown dedication to the program. At the end of the program, the muchcoveted Foster Grandparent of the Year award is given out. According to Pustulka, “This year, the students and teachers both wrote us letters heavily endorsing one certain Grandparent. The students drew pictures of what this Grandparent meant to them,

FEATURE wrote us convincing essays, and one student even jokingly threatened us about what would happen if his or her grandparent did not win the award!” The panel listened to the students’, and the award went to Buffalo’s Jacqueline Daniels. Ms. Daniels volunteers at Enterprise Charter School in Buffalo, and she could not be prouder. “This is my fourth year in the program, and I absolutely love it,” she says. When someone asks her if she is getting tired or wants to cut back her hours, Ms. Daniels replies, “No way. I enjoy this too much. I love talking with the kids and helping mold them while they are still young and can go off to do great things.” A retired debt collector who has lived in Buffalo the last thirty years but is originally from Chicago, Ms. Daniels loves having such a beneficial reason to get out of the house and stay active. Plus, she often encourages other seniors she knows to take part in the program and help mold the futures of children.

Currently Catholic Charities of Buffalo has Foster Grandparent Programs running in seventeen Buffalo Public Schools. Additionally, the program runs locally in three charter schools, parochial schools, and even Head-Start programs. To be eligible for the program, one must be over the age of 55; considered low income by national guidelines; able to volunteer between fifteen and forty hours per week on a consistent basis; and be an Erie County resident. Not all people will be eligible for this federally funded program. However, the Catholic Charities of Buffalo Foster Grandparent Program is very grateful for any donation. To help keep the program afloat, one can donate money on the Catholic Charities of Buffalo website and state that he or she would like the donation to go directly to the program. Between Erin Pustulka’s contagious enthusiasm for this program and Ms. Daniels’ tale of spending the day helping a kindergartener to recognize

Grandparent of the Year Jackie Foster (left) with Bonnie Cox (right), the teachers aid from her classroom.

numbers and letters, thinking about this program and its accomplishments warms the heart and gives us hope for the future. FY

Anthony Chabala is a local attorney and educator.

November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 21

FEATURE

Attitude of Gratitude BY JUDITH A. RUCKI

rom Bing Crosby to Diana Krall, many singers have recorded Irving Berlin’s classic Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep. Berlin advises, “Just count your blessings instead of sheep, and you’ll fall asleep counting your blessings.” The worriers and insomniacs among us may find this simplistic, but it could be the start of a better way of looking at life’s issues, both big and small. Remember the heat wave we experienced toward the end of September? That was when my compressor decided it was done

working, and I had no air conditioning during the hottest of the days. Not to mention the nights—the hot, sweaty nights. I was annoyed and complained to everyone who would listen. Then Hurricane Maria hit Puerto Rico. Suddenly it dawned on me; a lack of air conditioning was not a hardship. The problem was resolved, and my life went on. It won’t be that simple a fix for those who lost everything to any of the hurricanes that hit this year. Unfortunately, it may take someone else’s terrible situation to make us realize that some of the things we grouse about are not that big a deal in the long run. We also may be worrying about situations or events that will never come to pass. Don’t borrow trouble. It might be time for an “attitude of gratitude” to take over. While not the easiest thing for anyone who is anxious or pessimistic by nature, it may be time to start practicing. For those who believe in prayer, we may want to start with a heartfelt “thank you” for all the blessings we already enjoy before we ask for anything else. Meditation also can help. I’ve practiced yoga for years, but I still work on clearing my mind. Instructors often start a class with sitting quietly and breathing. We listen to our breath. We are told to stay in the moment. This means being mindfully aware of what is going on in the here and now. Too often we “go through

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

the motions” without actually thinking about what we really want to be doing. We may have negative thoughts or feelings without ever realizing we have the option to be happy. Something you can do right this minute to center yourself is close your eyes, put a hand over your heart, and take one deep breath. Dwelling on the past or stressing about the future can be draining. Remember the old saying, “Stop and smell the roses”? Take it to heart. For example, if you are driving somewhere and are fretting about what you have to do when you get there, you aren’t enjoying the beauty of the day or the fun of the drive. I recently read The Book of Joy by Nobel Peace Prize Laureates His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, with author Douglas Abrams. While the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu have survived more than fifty years of exile and oppression, they say it is because of their hardships that they are both joyful people. The Dalai Lama says a “strong sense of concern for the well-being of all sentient beings” will make us happy. He believes meditating on compassion and kindness for others is the way to maintaining a calm and joyous mind. Archbishop Tutu believes “there are some aspects of empathy and compassion that can only be discovered through suffering.” We may need to change our way of looking at suffering

and adversity. Instead of focusing on how difficult an employer is, we can rise to the challenge of becoming tougher and more resilient. Empathizing with others who are going through a similar hardship, like a mass layoff, can expand our capacity for empathy. The book points out that when we have compassion for others, we can develop a joyous mind. Author Douglas Abrams points out, “We would be missing the main message of the Dalai Lama’s and the Archbishop’s teachings if we did not emphasize that the source of true joy … is in our relationship with other people.” He adds, “Ultimately, joy is not something to learn, it is something to live. And our greatest joy is lived in deep, loving, and generous relationships with others.” For many of us, this has been a difficult year. Personal issues aside, we have seen much suffering in our own country and around the world. It can be challenging to absorb the daily news and not feel devastated. It may take some practice, but try to start the day with a pleasant thought. When we are feeling helpless or hopeless, it might be time to step outside ourselves and do something kind for someone else. At the end of the day, think about what good things there are in life. FY Judith A. Rucki is a public relations consultant and freelance writer.

FEATURE

Thanks Given Is a Gift Received BY REBECCA CUTHBERT

hile we reflect this season on what we’re thankful for, let’s take time to appreciate the people around us who support us in myriad ways all throughout the year. From your friends and family members who celebrate your best days and love you on our worst, to your neighbors who cheer up your mornings with smiles and waves, to the coworkers who make Mondays feel like at least Tuesdays, they all deserve to be reminded of how important they are. However, tokens of gratitude needn’t be showy or elaborate—in fact, simple and heartfelt gestures often mean the most. We explore the Emily Post Institute’s website (emilypost.com) for just the right way to say thanks. Friends and Family These are the folks who know you better than you know yourself—and vice versa. Because you have been up hill and over dale together, the perfect way to

thank them for their unconditional love is with an unrestrained letter of gratitude. No store-bought gift could be more special than your handwritten words recounting cherished memories (or mischief!)

Thursday, November 9th at 5:30 pm

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

and recalling all the moments they’ve made richer simply by being present. In the Emily Post Institute’s “The Importance of a Handwritten Thank-you Note,” Dan Post Senning declares the timelessness of the artform: “In an increasingly informal digital world, continuing to pull out pen and paper is a way to distinguish yourself. The handwritten thank-you note speaks volumes simply as a medium and sends the message that you care enough to invest yourself personally in acknowledging another,” he writes. Senning calls the handwritten note a “treasure in sealed packet.” Unlike emails and texts that will be deleted and forgotten, a personal letter can be tucked in a desk drawer or keepsake box and re-read on rainy days (both literal and figurative!). And who wouldn’t want a reminder of just how much they’re loved and appreciated? Neighbors Long letters full of special memories may not be appropriate thank-you gifts for neighbors, with whom you likely have a more casual relationship. However, if Phil next door saves your recycle bin from the crushing tires of passing traffic

every Monday, or Sally across the street is careful to clean up after her dog when walking him in front of your house, it’s important to show thanks by matching the gestures when and where you can. The Post Institute’s “Neighborly Manners” guide notes that “a smile, a wave, and a pleasant ‘hello’ are probably the easiest way to show neighbors that they matter to you,” but, “make sure you always say ‘thank you,’ and be willing to return the favor.” Small, seasonal gifts are always appropriate, as well, and if you’re crafty, showing your appreciation doesn’t need to lighten your purse. A cute flower arrangement in a thrifted teacup, a homemade batch of cranberry muffins, or a pineconeand-peanut-butter birdfeeder is all it takes to say “Howdy, neighbor! Thanks for shooing that skunk away from my front steps on Saturday!” Coworkers Striking the right balance of “earnest” and “professional” may seem tricky when it comes to thanking colleagues for their help or guidance, especially when you’d like to extend that gratitude to a manager (or to someone you manage). You don’t want it to seem like you’re trying to curry favor;

FEATURE nor do you want to seem like you are granting that favor to others. In “The Workplace and The Holidays,” also by Post Senning, he cautions against large, ostentatious gifts of any kind, regardless of reason. For a supervisor, “a pooled gift from you and other employees that isn’t too expensive or personal is fine,” and for direct reports, giving gifts is, “certainly a nice gesture and a great way to acknowledge those who work for you. If you do decide to give gifts, give across the board.” If an individual at work does a favor for you that makes your day (or saves it), acknowledge it with a thoughtful gesture that won’t cause discomfort. Great options include baked goods or other food items, cups of coffee from the corner café, and “favorite” office supplies (but not from the office closet). In some cases, an emailed note is just fine— if you’re specific, sincere, and don’t stray from your topic, your “thank you” message will come across

loud and clear while remaining professional. Every year, this season reminds us not to take the special people in our lives for granted. Slowing down and taking time to show our appreciation for them, though, is enjoyable for us, too. When you sit down to write an honest letter of gratitude, you get to relive those memories and savor that relationship; leaving your kind neighbor a jar of fresh preserves will make you feel good; and fostering positive relationships at work will only make the environment more pleasant for everyone. In this time of giving, put “thanks” at the top of your list—and when your gratitude is repaid, send it out again! FY Rebecca Cuthbert lives, writes, and cares for shelter dogs in Dunkirk. She is a frequent contributor to Forever Young and Buffalo Spree.

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MY WNY STORY

Sharon Bryk Oncology Esthetician BY JUDITH A. RUCKI

oo often, skin care is an afterthought, and facials seem to be more an occasional luxury than a part of our regular maintenance. Sharon Bryk, a licensed esthetician and certified oncology esthetician, has an entirely different outlook. Bryk began her career in her teens, known as chemosurgery) for basal cell selling Elizabeth Arden and Shiseido carcinoma.” at a department store’s cosmetics Before retiring, Bryk went back to department. After completing school school to obtain her license in esthetics at Erie Community College and the and later received more training and University at Buffalo, she entered the certification in oncology facials. She medical field, working in pathology. says, “I never lost my love of skin care Certified Oncology Esthetician She says, “It was there I gained more and cosmetics. I came back full circle Sharon Bryk Photo courtesy of S. Bryk knowledge about skin on a microscopic with more knowledge and maturity.” level. I also assisted a surgeon in “I processed breast biopsies and performing Mohs surgery (also mastectomy specimens,” she says of her interest in oncology facials. “I learned how treatments such as chemotherapy and radiation can affect the skin. I felt that treatment for skin issues due to chemotherapy was lacking in this area.” of WNY She agrees that facials were once a very Locally owned superficial treatment, but not anymore. “Your One Stop Retail Shop” “The products and procedures used help treat a variety of skin issues.” Facials are not a one-size-fits-all treatment. Bryk says her clients often Low Prices, Huge Selections comment that they feel their skin is glowing. “I perform the facial after an Golden Lift Chairs examination of the skin and adjust Walkers • Grab Bars accordingly. I use products with natural

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ingredients and organic essential oils. They are gentle and effective. This is especially crucial when working with oncology clients whose skin can develop issues that were not normally there.” She adds, “Your esthetician sees changes in your skin over time, and may recommend that a dermatologist be seen. “ Bryk says mature skin tends to become drier and loses some of its elasticity. “This is due to exposure to the sun and weather. Other factors are smoking, chemotherapy, radiation, and poor nutrition. A facial will help exfoliate, rehydrate, and soothe the skin. The products used retain the moisture in the skin. There are serums and other treatments that help the skin look more youthful by minimizing wrinkles, hydrating, and brightening the skin.” Bryk says chemotherapy skin can react to ingredients found in facial products. “Products used during a facial have to be selected carefully, so as not to aggravate existing issues. Also, some clients are sensitive to scents. We call this ‘chemo nose.’” The facial itself is different because care must be taken when performing a facial massage and working around ports. “There are things that can be done in a standard facial that you may not want to do in an oncology facial. Clients feel more comfortable because they know that I am aware of their needs.” She is also a trainer for Look Good Feel Better for the American Cancer Society. This is a two-hour program where the client receives a bag with makeup and facial products, which are donated by various companies. “In the program

MY WNY STORY we cover facial care, makeup, wigs, and scarf tying.” Bryk generously offers some skin care tips. She says, “As we mature, our rate of skin cells turning over begins to slow. This can contribute to a duller, rougher looking skin. I recommend exfoliation two to three times a week depending on your skin needs and the product that you choose to use.” But stay away from nut shells; they may be too harsh. “Now is the time to start. We won’t be spending as much time in the sun, and we’ll be in heated buildings and cold outdoors. Moisturizer and eye cream are essential. And don’t forget a sunscreen! “Speaking of the sun, many of us have done much damage to our skin in our younger days. At one time, sunscreen did not exist. The damage can be seen today. Exfoliation, professional peels, and topical products can help reduce the pigment that rises to the surface of the skin.” Along with oncology facials, Bryk offers a corrective facial for sensitive skin, teen acne facials, customized

treatment for men (including a face, neck and shoulder massage), purifying back treatments, and an intense hand treatment that can be added on to any facial. Bryk is also a certified yoga instructor with the Himalayan Institute International. She will begin offering gentle yoga and yoga for persons with cancer classes at the Fountain Wellness Center in 2018. FY

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Judith A. Rucki is a public relations consultant and freelance writer. For more information: Sharon Bryk Owner/Esthetician Essential Skin Care @ The Fountain Wellness Center 553-4865 The American Cancer Society 800-395-5665 lookgoodfeelbetter.org

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NEWS

What Is Guardianship? BY DR. SAM SUGAR

magine you’ve worked hard all of your life and suddenly you are deemed incapacitated and are stripped of your dignity and basic individual rights. You have been abducted from your home, isolated from your family, and “placed” somewhere to be medicated while your assets are being pillaged. The authorities that should be protecting you are the ones committing these heinous acts. It sounds like Nazi Germany, but this is happening in the United States today. The victims are seniors. The partners in crime are financial predators and agents of the Elder Guardianship system—attorneys, professional guardians, medical experts, and others who are paid out of the senior’s assets. There are some good judges but many are overworked and some are actively aiding the exploitation. Anyone can file to deem you incapacitated. The entire process from filing an incapacity petition to plenary guardianship where all rights are removed can happen within days. Yet, once you’re caught in the web, it’s almost impossible to break free... and you are forced to pay your abusers in the process. – From “Is Elder Guardianship a New Form of Human Trafficking?” by Dr. Terri Kennedy, HuffPost, September 13, 2016 According to AARP.org, “Adult Guardianship is a relationship created by state law in which a court gives one person or entity (the guardian) the duty and power to make personal

and/or property decisions for another (the incapacitated person or ward). A judge appoints a guardian upon finding that an adult lacks capacity to make decisions for him or herself.

Guardianships are established through a legal process outlined in state law. The process begins with a petition alleging incapacity, followed by a court hearing, a judicial finding

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on capacity, and the appointment of a guardian. The judge may appoint a guardian of the person only, a guardian of the property only (often known as a 'conservator'), or guardian for both the person and the property. The appointment may be an emergency order if the person is at risk of immediate harm. The appointment also may be 'limited'to specified areas of decision-making. Guardians may be family members, friends, private nonprofit agencies, private for-profit agencies, public guardianship agencies, attorneys serving as guardian, financial institutions (for property decisions), or volunteers. Upon appointment, the guardian may be required to post a bond, and must submit periodic reports and accountings to court. A current 'best guess' national estimate of the number of adults under guardianship in the United States is approximately 1.5 million." Exploring Guardianship In this series of articles, we will explore the sordid and chilling details of what can best be described as the Guardianship Racket in the United States and what can be done about it. In courts all over the United States, lawyers, judges, and professional guardians wage a merciless war on the rights and property of innocent Americans. The laws intended to protect the frail and poor among us have been perverted to allow sophisticated predators in court to illegitimately amass great fortunes at the expense of innocent victims and families. The stories are so terribly sad. And outrageous. And terrifying. But, they play out every day in probate courts around the country, particularly in states with large elderly populations like Florida, Texas, Colorado, and Washington. The stories that come out of probate courts are so horrific that they border on being incomprehensible. The abuse heaped on anyone who tried to stand in the way of this merciless system is equally horrific and unbelievable. Until it happens to you. The “wards” and their families (the

NEWS replacement name given to those who have been declared “incapacitated” by the court) are treated worse than murderers. They are forcibly separated from loved ones, they are chemically restrained with lethal handler drugs, and often moved from location to location under cover of night to prevent any contact with a loved one so as to maintain total sadistic control over an innocent’s life. Families often spend their entire life savings trying to rescue a loved one from guardianship, to no avail. The saying among the guardianship victims’ families is that there are only three outcomes—“you wind up broke, crazy, or dead.” In the United States, there are more than 1.5 million “wards” at any given time. Thousands more are created every month in state probate court proceedings, and the number of new guardianships has been increasing by double digits nationally. Court clerks who are tasked with auditing and watching out for fraud by the predators are overwhelmed. In almost every state, horror stories keep piling up, and lives are ruined, fortunes stolen, and families destroyed. It is a system that just does not pass the smell test. On any level, this is not how government is supposed to work. It is estimated that the money involved in guardianships exceeds 2-3 trillion dollars yearly! Exposing this system is a challenge. Even though it is a real threat to anyone with assets of any kind, the court cases are called “mental health issues” and so are hidden from the public. Until you are targeted, you will never even hear of guardianship, but when it comes calling, with a knock on the door from a total stranger saying you are wanted in court in forty-eight hours for a hearing on whether you can manage your own affairs, it is already far too late. When a judge hears a hired gun lawyer’s outrageous allegations— they do not need to be true or even provable—about how a frail person has been “exploited” or subjected to “undue influence” there is no hesitation to impose the “civil death sentence” of complete or “plenary” professional for profit guardianship.

At that moment, the game is over. All the legal safeguards supposedly in place to protect us against abuse are suddenly perverted and unleashed against innocent victims and their families. At that moment the “ward” will have fewer rights than a serial killer. We were taught that America was the home of the free and the land of the brave. I believed that we, as American citizens, had freedom; that our basic God-given rights were fully intact; that elder abuse was not tolerated; that state agencies were put in place to protect the elderly, not do them more harm. What we have discovered is the exact opposite. We are not free. The state agencies in place to protect the elderly do not protect them. When we started researching elder abuse and guardianship, what we discovered had us reeling; how could I be so unaware of such a huge issue? After all, I read the newspapers, listen to the radio and watch the news. Shouldn’t such blatant criminal acts and travesties of justice be headline news? Isn’t kidnapping illegal? I still remember hearing about the kidnapping of the Lindbergh baby, an incident that happened in 1932, a story that is as ingrained in America’s history as all of the World Wars and the assassination of President Kennedy. So why is the kidnapping of the most vulnerable members of our society being ignored? Why is it allowed to go on? Why aren’t the criminals that perpetrate these acts in jail? If you have questions about this important issue, email them to drsam@aaapg.net FY Sam Sugar MD is Founder and President of the 501c3 Foundation Americans Against Abusive Probate Guardianship in Hollywood Florida. He is a Board Certified Specialist in Internal Medicine and an expert, having analyzed and catalogued over 600 abusive guardianships nationwide since 2014. Find it at aaapg.net and on Facebook.

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LET’S TALK ABOUT...

Coping with the Holidays BY JUDITH A. RUCKI

he holidays are rapidly approaching, and any one of us could probably tick off a list of reasons to be less than joyous.

Maybe it’s the first set of holidays since a loved one passed away. An elderly parent may be in a nursing home, which is hardly a cheery place to celebrate. Health issues, separation from family, and long-standing grudges can all give us the blues. So how do we cope?

One friend gets out of town rather than force a celebration. She takes a cruise or schedules a vacation out of the country. For those who may not have the time or means for travel, there are other solutions to beat the holiday blahs. If we start now, we may be

www.foreveryoungwny.com | November 2017

able to have a better holiday than we expect. Exercise is a good place to begin. Honest. Take a brisk walk. Hit the gym. Do some yoga. We could even lose a couple of pounds instead of winding up in a sugar stupor. Remember to get enough sleep. As long as we are talking about healthy activities, watch the alcohol intake. It’s easy to overindulge, and alcohol can act as a depressant. How much is too much? One drink equals 12 ounces of beer, five ounces of wine or 1.5 ounces of hard liquor. The recommended limit for “older” folks is 14 drinks per week for men and seven per week for women. If we’re looking to indulge, a facial, massage, manicure, or new haircut could do the trick. We all have some fun things we enjoy doing. Visit a favorite bookstore. Go to a concert or listen to carolers. Take a stroll through a mall at a time when it’s not too crowded and enjoy the decorations. Window shop. If you belong to a house of worship, plan to attend a service. Inquire about ministry programs. We might enjoy volunteering our time and talent. Many religious groups offer meetings and programs for people who are having difficulty coping. Chances are we all know people

who will be alone over the holidays. Call them. See if they want to get out and do something. Maybe binge on old holiday movies. Make some popcorn and turn on the Hallmark channel. Invite a few friends over for a holiday dinner. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Potluck can be fun anytime. It doesn’t even have to be on the actual day. The idea is to be surrounded by supportive, upbeat people. We’ve all had a falling out with someone at some time. Now might be the time to try to reconnect. Mail a card with a nice note. Send an e-mail. Someone out there needs us. Check with schools, hospitals, museums, soup kitchens, and nursing homes to see where we might be of help. Contact the United Way for more ideas. Many of us like to bake. Whip up a batch of holiday cookies or some homemade specialty. Take it to an elderly neighbor or shut-in who would really appreciate a treat. Visit awhile. If friends care enough to keep inviting us somewhere, we need to get up and go already. Besides, someone new and interesting might be there. And yes, it’s OK to limit the amount of time we spend with people who give us stress.

LET’S TALK ABOUT... While we don’t want to give in to total holiday misery, it really is OK to cry if we’re feeling down. Sometimes a good cry can be cleansing. Circumstances may find us grieving. We need to set realistic limits on our energy. We don’t have to be everything to everyone, and we need to be kind to ourselves. Not everyone enjoys being surrounded by a lot of people, especially if their cheeriness is overwhelming at the moment. Nothing says we can’t take ourselves out to a movie or spend the holiday in front of the fireplace with a good book. We might want to reflect on a missing loved one. This could be the time to do something for someone else in his or her memory. Set up a scholarship. Donate to his or her favorite cause. Adopt a needy family. Gone are the days when we went into mourning and wore black clothes for a year or a lifetime. It is healthy for us to start enjoying

ourselves again. Remember that laughter is not a sign of disrespect. It means we are healing. Imagine a conversation with a lost loved one where we could ask if it is all right to laugh again. Most likely the answer would be a resounding, “Yes!” Often, when we do something nice for someone else, it lifts our spirits, even if it’s a small thing. Smile at the cashier. Be patient while waiting in line. Let someone else go ahead of you. For anyone feeling seriously depressed, it’s worth a call to your primary caregiver. He or she can make a recommendation for professional help. Depression is treatable. Remember that each holiday is just one day. We need to take them one at a time. FY

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GETAWAYS

Tales of Two Northern German Cities Bremen and Cologne STORY AND PHOTOS BY JENNIFER MERRICK

the year 1653. It’s estimated worth is 20,000 Euros for a thimbleful, but even if I did have a Swiss bank account with that kind of spare cash, I still couldn’t partake. The last person to be given this honour was Queen Elizabeth II in 1978. I could, however, theoretically buy a small bottle of a 1727 vintage for a mere $1,500, but I think I’ll just settle for the memory of being surrounded by the divine aroma of the historic vintages. Besides, there are thousands of other bottles to choose from in the cellar, all vetted by “the nose,” the cellar master whose coveted job it is to choose which German wines are deemed worthy enough to bear the Bremen coat of arms. Buy a bottle or enjoy a glass at the Ratskeller Restaurant, which has been serving up traditional German fare to townsfolk, seafarers, merchants, and travellers since medieval times. Beyond the town hall and the market square, there’s plenty more to explore. Stroll the narrow alleyways of the Schnoor Quarter with its colourful houses, shops, and restaurants. Or sip on decaf coffee and indulge in chocolate on Böttcherstrasse, a pedestrian alleyway.

The historic Bremen town square

Bremen Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella and Little Red Riding Hood are Brother Grimm’s fairy tales we’re all familiar with. But have you heard of the Town Musicians of Bremen? I hadn’t until I visit Bremen, a city located along the Weser River in northwest Germany. Both the tale and the city turn out to be charming. Die Bremer Stadtmusikanten, as the tale is called in German, tells the story of four animals of a certain age and no longer useful to their masters, who set off to Bremen to become musicians. On the way there, they encounter robbers and, working together, the senior misfits scare them off and live happily ever after. Today in Bremen’s well-preserved town square, there’s a bronze sculpture of a donkey, dog, cat and rooster, all standing on top of each other to commemorate the story. Tourists pay homage by rubbing the two feet of the donkey, which is believed to make your 32

wishes come true. “You need to rub both,” I’m told. “Otherwise, you’re just shaking hands with a donkey.” But it is a wish come true just to be in this European market square with its cathedral, Roland Statue, and cobblestoned pedestrian streets. Its most impressive town hall, The Rathaus, was built between 1405 and 1410 in Gothic style with a Renaissance facade added 200 years later. Gilded and turreted, every inch of this ornate and bejeweled civic building has something to admire, whether it’s the grand doors, stained glass, intricately carved wooden walls,

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oil paintings, calligraphy, or miniature canons or models of Hanseatic League ships hanging from the ceiling. There are hidden treasures, too. The historical Ratskeller, beneath the 600-year-old town hall, is home to the oldest drinkable wine in Germany, if not the world. We enter the Apostle Cellars, and a thick portly perfume greets us immediately as our eyes grow accustomed to the candlelight illuminating the century-old vats, named after the twelve apostles. In the heart of the cellar is the Rüdesheim wine, the oldest of all, dating back to

A bronze sculpture depicting the fabled Town Musicians of Bremen in the town square

GETAWAYS

Traditional German fare from the Ratskellar Restaurant

Decaf because Ludwig Roselius, who rebuilt this famous stretch, made his fortune with the invention of it, and chocolate because, well, who doesn’t like German chocolate? For something more modern, check out “Das Viertel,” which literally means the quarter. Only a short distance from the city center, this colourful neighbourhood offers an eclectic collection of theatres, museums, restaurants, pubs, and nightlife. Cologne A three-hour train ride brings us to the city of Cologne, Germany, where we discover a couple more interesting fictional characters: Tunnes and Schal. But before I fill you in about the story behind these early nineteenth century puppets, allow me to share the jawdropping sight that awaits you as you exit the train station in the city center. It is, of course, Cologne’s most famous landmark, the Cologne Cathedral. At 516 feet, this gothic behemoth is the tallest Roman Catholic cathedral in the world, which actually makes it difficult to capture a picture of it from the ground, unless you stand way, way back. Otherwise, you have a shot of perhaps half of one of its two huge spires or maybe one intricately carved door, framed with layers of sculptures, or a menacing looking gargoyle. Inside, the level of detail and amount of treasures within its frescoed walls

are equally impressive, like the carved oak stalls; 90,000 feet of stained glass; medieval wooden sculptures, including the Madonna of Milan; and the reason the cathedral was built in the first place—the Shrine of the Magi. The relics of the Three Wise Men are believed to be inside the world’s largest golden reliquary, which attracts pilgrims and tourists from around the world. Underneath the soaring vaulted ceilings, I feel dwarfed and experience the same sense of awesomeness as when I’m in the mountains or particularly beautiful places in nature. We also gain an appreciation of just how huge this cathedral is when we climb the stairs to the top. Be warned: it’s over 500 steps and the staircase narrows at some parts. But it’s a thrill to see a bird’s eye view of the Rhine River and a city that has been drawing visitors since 50 AD. And we marvel at the fact that it dates back to the mid-thirteenth century and has survived intact despite WWII bombing. It’s when we venture beyond the cathedral to explore more of Cologne that we first come across the city’s famous puppets. Our guide points out a skinny guy in an overcoat and a stockier fellow with a large nose, who are painted in a large mural in the eclectic neighborhood of Ehrenfeld. “That’s Tunnes and Schal,” our guide

The interior of the Cologne Cathedral

tells us and explains a little about their background. I don’t really give them a second thought as we continue to explore this creative district. Art is everywhere in Ehrenfeld with many large-scale urban art projects, murals and countless galleries. One particularly moving mural commemorates the “Edelweiss Pirates,” a group of young people who refused to join the Hitler Youth and focussed instead on love and music. The memorial marks the site of their execution in 1944. Besides the art, the community is known for its variety of eateries and nightlife. I never thought I’d be eating vegan in a country known for bratwurst and pork specialities, but the veggie burger and sweet potato fries at Bunte Burger hit the spot, as does the Kolsh beer at Braustelle. But Tunnes and Schal are not to be forgotten as they make an appearance again the next morning at the Museum of Applied Arts (MAKK), where they’re on display in their newest exhibition PLAY UP! We learn a little bit more about their character and importance. “The skinny one is called Schal

because he’s looking squarely,” explains Peter Mark, the exhibition’s curator. “He’s always trying to make a profit and come up with business ideas but usually fails.” Tunnes, on the other hand, is more rural than city and unsophisticatedly good-natured. The puppets first appeared at the Hänneschen Theater as early as 18101830, but had a life outside the stage in magazines, newspaper articles and jokes. “They’re the local embodiment of Cologne,” says Mark. And so now we now know these comic characters are part of the culture, people, and humour of this fun-loving and commercial city. We see them again in a musical display in one of the city’s many taverns, and there are bronze statues of them near the Great St. Martin Church. Like the Town Musicians of Bremen statue, you can rub the bronze for good luck though in this case, you need grip firmly on Tunnes large bulbous nose instead of the donkey’s feet. FY Jennifer Merrick is a freelance writer and avid traveler based in Toronto.

November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 33

BEING WELL

An Apple a Day BY CATHERINE STACK

pples provide many health benefits, especially during the fall season when they are picked fresh and local.

Apples are one of the best sources of flavonoids and phytochemicals (compounds in plants, fruits, and vegetables) that are potent antioxidants and help protect our body from a host of degenerative illnesses, including cancer. Studies have shown that quercetin, a

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flavonoid found in apples, has been a key component to preventing the growth of prostate cancer cells. The skin of the apple has been shown to inhibit the growth of colon cancer cells by as much as 43%. Lung and bladder cancers have been slowed as well. Apples contain high water content at approximately 80%, and living enzymes that help to improve digestion throughout the system. They contain a great source of fiber—pectin—which also helps to improve colon function, along with improving blood cholesterol levels. Fructose, a simple sugar, is responsible for giving apples their sweetness. Unlike many other forms of sugar, the sugar found in an apple breaks down slowly. This, when combined with the fiber in apples, helps prevent spikes in

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blood sugar and will more likely be converted to natural energy for the body. The apple contains over 200 nutrients, and potassium is found in large amounts. Apples are also a good source of many vitamins, especially vitamin C. Actually, eating 100 grams of apple will give you the equivalent of 1,500 milligrams worth of this potent antioxidant. Apples may also help those with anemia, as they contain iron. Raw organic apple cider vinegar has been widely and successfully used for a long list of ailments. Among other things, cider vinegar is very effective in detoxifying various organs of the body. It helps to break down mucous and

fatty deposits and helps the body achieve a healthy state of alkalinity. I recommend it often in those having trouble digesting their food. The Apple Diet Cleanse was frequently recommended by health guru and “sleeping prophet” Edgar Cayce (1877-1945). The diet is simple. Three days of organic apples, plenty of water, and, on the night of the third day, two to three tablespoons of cold pressed olive oil. You are to take it easy while on this cleaning protocol and get plenty of rest. I have seen people drop a few pounds and clear up the whites of eyes as part of the detoxifying effect it has. My only caution would be to make sure you are drinking plenty of water. Remember, apples contain fiber,

BEING WELL which may constipate you if you do not follow through with adequate amounts of water. One of the most fascinating qualities of the apple is that they help to balance the body. In constipation, the apple can help “move things along” while those suffering from diarrhea will get relief by “slowing things down.” For those needing to lose weight, the apple provides fiber, which helps to keep the body feeling full and prevents food cravings. If weight gain is needed, the apple provides assistance as well. There are many other benefits from eating apples. “An apple a day keeps the doctor away” has an increasing number of supportive scientific evidences for its claim. FY

Catherine Stack (RN, ND) is the author of the “Natural Health” column for the Niagara Gazette. She is also a practicing Doctor of Naturopathy, Certified Nurse Midwife, and the founder and CEO of Journey II Health Center for Rejuvenation. Her book, Free Yourself from a CONSTIPATED Life, is available on Amazon. Visit her website at journeyiihealth.com or email cath626@gmail.com.

November 2017 | www.foreveryoungwny.com 35

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NOTEWORTHY 24

November 2 Alton Brown Live: Eat Your Science The Food Network star and science-y chef puts on a fascinating show.

7 p.m. at Mainstage Theatre (Center for the Arts, UB North Campus, Amherst; ubcfa.org or 645-6915)

November 18 Frankie Avalon The legendary Italian-American actor, singer, and former teen idol performs.

8 p.m. at Riviera Theatre (67 Webster St., North Tonawanda; rivieratheatre.org or 692-2413)

November 9 Toni Morrison Just Buffalo welcomes Nobel Prize winner Toni Morrison as we return to her novel Beloved—her masterpiece ghost story about how the specter of slavery haunts us.

8 p.m. at Kleinhans Music Hall (3 Symphony Cir.; justbuffalo.org or 832-5400)

November 24 Train Day See some great model trains and revel in the history.

1 p.m.–4 p.m. at The Buffalo History Museum (One Museum Court; buffalohistory.org or 873 9644)

November 30 Irving Berlin’s America Check out this new musical play based on the life of songwriter Irving Berlin.

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