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By Jack Dionne ::

The sky was clear, the sun was bright, the day was just a beauty; says I "I guess I'll hit the ball, at selling do my duty. For I know scadsr of people all around this busy town' who need a lot of Utlitairrg itti"gr, so I'll go knock them down. I've read all of this. selling dope the Dionne Publications aie handirrt out, and I'm convinced that we're just 'service stations,-for building thought, and birilding things, and Better Building Service; that we should save the builder all the jobs that make him nervous." yn rd ^i. q 'l

I took along my book of plans, I took my order book, I took along a lot of thoughts to bait my sellinglooi. I took "torrg .lot of pep, I took my prospect chart; said I "the peo' Of" aft a L""Jh, are sold before they start." And in this wise I sallied forth' to set the world afame; ,,this selling stuff is (on the square) so easy it's a shame."

,that he for years has saved his money to build a home; and now's the time for me to push ffi .;"r; r'il sell him just the home he wants, and soon he'll be in clover'" I found him L,-i;aii'-y .i.rm,' t gave him all the dope, I proved to him I had the home that filled his every hope. And whln I'd finished with my facts he said, "That stuff is great' but I've decided that another year I'm going to wait-before I build; and then I will erect a mansion grand, right in the center of a *rery lovely piece of land. Instead of just a lot I'm going to have at least a block for I've invested allmy cash in Get Rich Quick oil Stock' come round again injust a year, and I',ll have gobs ofmoney." And so I lost the home sale I was going to make to BunnY.

This cooled me some, but on I went, said "I',ll not be bluffed; I'll make another call and sell a place to Johnnie Stuft. For he's tomarry Sallie Sweet, they'll want a home' I know;,, so in I went to sell that boy a lovely bungalow. I found h'im sitting at his desk, as happy as a clam; "come in" said he "and let me show how wise a guy I am'" And frotn fri" safe he pulled a roll of sheets that were engraved; "I've bought this wondrous stock with all the money I had saved. A good, kind friend gave me the tip, 'twas inside information; he did it cause his cousin knew a friend of my relation' lle guarantees 'twill make me rich in just a month or so; this hundred shares of stock in this big Blue Sky Oil Well Co. And when it does, belie. e me boy, I'll surely spend a gob of cash to build a splendid home, and you shall have the job'"

So out I went into the street, I felt I needed air; "these city folks must all be kind of crazy, I declare." And when I'd tried another man, and found that he'd invested, in Easy Money oil Stocks, as a friend of his suggested; I hopped into my 'rattler' then and lor the country few, said I "these easy city folks are making me feel blue' I'll call upon some farmer friends, these tillers of the soil, have too much common sense to buy these worthless stocks in oil."

The country air revived myfaith, I called on Farmer Lusher, and nearly fainted when I found him talking of a "gusher," th.t he was absolutely sure was coming in as quick as scat; and he'd investea atitris coin in this sure thing Wild Cat' I told it all to Farmer Brown, who laughed aloud with glee; "that fellow Lusher isa mark to buy such stock," said he, ,,when he could just as well invest in something good and fine. I've bought some stock thatjust can't lose in a big silver mine. A man in New York City sent me this wondrous chance, and I've invested everything except my coat and pants'"

Oh, Barnum ! Mr. Barnum ! It was you who truly cried-''lhere's a fool born every q1inq1s"-3nd the truth was not denied. But things have speeded mightily, since you the foot crop reckoned; TODAY THEY MUST BE COMING AT THE RATE OF ONE A SECOND.

THE CALI RNIA LUMBER MERCHANT of

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