Flatbush Buzz #167 Dec 15th 2019

Boro Park Edition

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Volume 7, Issue 167 Dec. 15th 2019

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My Yellow Sticky Hanukkah

by Alan Magill and Miriam Greenwald

In the midst of the office Christmas party, I shocked myself by asking, “Are we doing anything for Hanukkah?”

I

moved to New York as a nonreligious Jew in the mid-80s to pursue my interest in playwriting.

Throughout a number of less than glamorous jobs, I worked sporadically on my current script, A Neurotic’s Guide to Manhattan, a comedy. It finally got to see the light of day, running for 16 weeks at an Off-Off Broadway Greenwich Village theatre. I was on my way!

One of my play’s directors worked at a company that consulted for Fortune 500 firms. Aware that the play ‘paid’ me two free seats for every performance, she made some introductions and viola! – I became a proofreader at a prestigious Manhattan firm.

My beautifully appointed office space testified to my upward move. A decent paycheck and one’s own desk can definitely inflate one’s feeling of selfworth.

I began attending a reform synagogue in my Brooklyn neighborhood on Friday nights because one of its members,

4

who liked my writing, was a lyricist for musical theatre. I was making new friends, writing plays, and being assigned more challenging jobs at work. My fellow proofreaders and I were getting along well when some discordant changes began to arrive on the scene.

On December tenth, a sign on the bulletin board invited us all to the staff holiday party. Stockings filled with striped candy canes decorated the walls. Mixed in with these symbols, overwhelmed, was a small, flat cardboard menorah, with a base on the bottom.

A few days later, the traditionally decorated tree appeared, with a smiling Santa beaming at it from a nearby wall.

One morning on my way to work, someone from Chabad handed a bag to me.

“Hanukkah candles in here,” he said, “with a menorah and transliterated blessings. The holiday begins tomorrow night.”

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morning I left the candles home, but took the blessings with me. Today would be the Christmas party and it somehow seemed important to bring that piece of paper with the Hebrew words I didn’t understand.

In anticipation of the big soiree, no gainful employment by my peers was even attempted after the clock struck twelve.

When the call to party was announced, I took a yellow sticky and placed it where I was up to in my work. Two hours and two strong drinks later – and I indulged the least of my co-workers – I barely remembered that I was a proofreader.

I ate too much and basically moped through the festivities. Joy reigned supreme in that meeting room, but I was not happy. My supervisor, holding a glass of eggnog and looking somewhat plastered, came up to me.

“Some party, huh?”

“Yeah,” I responded unenthusiastically, and shocked myself by asking, “Are we doing anything for Hanukkah here?”

She was obviously relieved at being

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called away just then.

Alone amidst a hundred ecstatic revelers, I walked out of the room, not feeling the holiday spirit. I strode up to my desk, reached into my briefcase, and took out the piece of paper with the Hanukkah blessings. Although I did not know what the words meant, they had somehow become very important to me.

I read the instructions above the transliteration.

“After sunset during Hanukkah, light the candles, one for the first night to the far right, the shames in the middle, and an additional one each succeeding night.”

Tipsy and fully aware that I had no candles and no menorah, I said a silent prayer that I could do something to acknowledge my holiday.

I suddenly spotted the small cardboard menorah and immediately knew what I wanted to do. Opening it, I stood it upon its base. From a blank yellow sticky paper, I cut two small ovals. Following the directions on the Chabad sheet, I read the transliterated blessings for the first night. After reciting them, I took the first oval and put it on the ‘candle’ top to the

far right and a second on the ‘shames.’

It may not have been correct according to Jewish law, but it was vital for me at that moment. Far from the hubbub, I felt content.

A moment later, however, I wasn’t alone. Another worker had come to get something from her desk.

“What are you doing?”

I smiled. “Lighting the menorah in the best way I know how for the first night of Hanukkah.”

“Cool!”

The next night, a few minutes after sunset, I stood at my desk over the cardboard menorah, said the blessings, and placed two yellow ovals plus one for the shames in their places. Last night’s visitor came to watch, along with others in my department. Impressed, they even asked questions about it.

And that’s the way the rest of Hanukkah went. Every evening, after sunset, I stopped work, said the blessings, and put more yellow oval stickies on the menorah. With each night, more and more people came to watch.

For the eighth night, in front of an

overflow, enthusiastic crowd, I said the blessings and ‘lit’ all of the candles. My supervisor was by now a regular attendee.

“Alan,” she said, “next year we’re going to get a large, beautiful menorah suitable for the occasion!”

In retrospect, I could have complained that my religious rights were not being respected. Although there is a time for open rebellion, as the Maccabees so courageously and poignantly demonstrated, this experience taught me that there is also a time for quietly, and with conviction, doing what you believe is right. And good things can come from that.

Many years have passed and today I am religiously observant. I say the blessings for my wife and myself before lighting real candles. We sing Maoz Tzur, recounting the miracles of years gone by, and bless the Almighty, ‘Who wrought miracles for our forefathers, in those days at this season.’

I think back fondly to that time when yellow sticky paper and a cardboard menorah made such a difference to me and so many others.

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The Smartest Kid in the Room

by Rabbi Menachem Lehrfield

I

can’t recall a single instance in all of my school years where I actually studied. My second grade teacher used to call me “Minimum Menachem” because I coasted through school without putting in any effort at all.

My teachers got especially frustrated when I would scan a test and if I didn’t know the answer to every single question I would hand it back blank.

At the time, I couldn’t tell you why I was doing it, but as an adult I now understand what I was doing. I went through life with my teachers telling me that I was smart.

This well-meaning praise was actually creating and reinforcing a fixed mindset.

Getting a ‘B’ or ‘C’ tarnishes that title - I am not really that bright after all. A blank test on the other hand just means I have an attitude problem. It doesn’t challenge my status as smartest kid in the room.

When I went to study in Yeshiva I entered a strange environment. There were no grades, no class rank and no one to motivate me. I began sinking.

Each day I studied the Talmud. It is made up mostly of incorrect assumptions to teach us how to learn. It forced me to expend effort and have the intellectual

18

honesty to abandon an idea that I have been working on for days or weeks when it no longer seems like the truth.

I was encouraged to try new strategies and approaches, to recognize what went wrong and how to avoid it in the future, to learn from and embrace mistakes instead of covering them up.

While studying in Yeshiva, I learned that the Torah never hides or covers up the mistakes of our great people. It highlights them so that we can learn from their mistakes, just as our heroes learned from their own.

It doesn’t paint the picture of the overnight success story, but rather focuses on the challenges that these great men and women overcame to become better versions of themselves. It is not despite the falling but as a result of falling and then learning from each mistake that makes the righteous person a success.

Gradually, I began to understand the importance of effort and broadening my outlook. Through Jewish teachings I began to realize that the process and journey of learning was more important than the destination or result.

Carol Dweck’s groundbreaking Mindset Research reaffirms everything Judaism has been teaching for 3,000 years.

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She explains that what people believe about their abilities, qualities and characteristics can determine a person’s behavior.

Professor Dweck’s research shows that when we praise a person for something they are (you are so smart, pretty, athletic, etc.) instead of something they did, we are creating and reinforcing a mindset that is fixed and unmalleable.

Instead of building up our child’s selfesteem, we are teaching them that their abilities are fixed so there is no point of working hard because they won’t change anyway. You are either smart or you’re not.

You are either pretty or you’re not. You are either athletic or you’re not.

We tend to feel most special when people compliment how we look or tell us how effortless things seem. “Wow, you’re such a natural!” The truth is, we have very little to do with how we look or any other God given attribute or ability. If we learned to appreciate ourselves and others for what we have actually accomplished we would begin to see “effortless” as an insult, not a compliment.

Judaism maintains that life is an effortbased system, not a results-based system.

As the Mishna says, “According to the effort is the reward.” This runs contrary to

It’s not our gifts that make us who we are; it’s how we use them that truly matters.

the way we interact regularly. If I hire you to paint my house and you don’t paint it, you don’t get paid. I don’t care how hard you tried, if you didn’t complete the job so you don’t get compensated.

A person’s value is not based on the God-given gifts with which he or she has been endowed. Those are tools on loan, and when the lease is up those tools return to their Owner. Only that which was built with those tools remains.

People often overlook the fact that Yom Kippur is a festival. It is a day that celebrates our mistakes. It is a day to reflect on the power of change. There is no room for Yom Kippur in a fixed mindset.

Yom Kippur is all about embracing a growth mindset. It is a day that reminds us that we can always change. That everyone can grow through effort, experience and practice. It’s not the gifts that make us who we are; it’s how we use those gifts to make ourselves and world better that truly matters.

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Exotic Hanukkah Foods

by Carol Ungar

Try something a little different – and very yummy!

Sephardic Latkes or Svinge Sephardic Latkes or SvingeSvinge is the Sephardic answer to latkes, light and crunchy eaten sprinkled with confectioners’ sugar.

Rabbi Maimon the son of Yosef, the father of the Rambam (Maimonides) says that eating svinge is integral to the Hanukkah celebration. For a small batch – enough for six people combine 11/2 cups of flour 1/2 t salt 1 t instant yeast 7/8 cup of warm water Mix these into a batter.

Let the batter sit for three hours until it has doubled or tripled in size. Then heat oil in a frying pan – this is another deep fry dish. Wet your hands. Tear off plum-sized pieces of the dough. Stretch them a bit and form a hole in the middle and fry on both sides.

Drain on paper towels, Sprinkle with confectioners’ sugar and eat right away.

Fried Fish Balls Fried Fish BallsFried foods to recall the miracle of the flask of oil and fish is a traditional Shabbat food – so it’s a perfect Shabbat Hanukkah dish.

In the UK, these fish balls are featured at all Jewish celebrations and for good reason – they are absolutely delicious and easy to make.

to form the fish into walnut-sized balls. Deep fry about six minutes until browned on all sides. (optional: add 1/4 t black pepper to the fish mix for a spicier fish ball) Eat hot or cold. Yum!

Defrost one roll of gefilte fish.

Add matzah meal one handful at a time, just enough

Kuku Sabzi Kuku SabziThis is a Persian frittata traditionally eaten on Hanukkah. Very healthy and very yummy.

2-3 eggs.

Half a bunch of fresh coriander Half a bunch of fresh parsley Quarter of a bunch of fresh dill Half an onion or three scallions

Add spices, salt, pepper, turmeric to taste.

Chop the herbs and onions or scallions are finely as you can – use fresh or frozen, never dried. You can also substitute fresh spinach leaves for the herbs.

Combine the herbs with eggs.

Chop all the vegies fine.

Pour the mixture into a heated greased frying pan.

Fry until lightly browned, then flip over.

Lightly grease a ceramic nonstick frying pan (2 tablespoons of vegetable oil or ghee).

Cut the kuku into wedges and served with yogurt and rice or crusty bread and feta cheese too.

Lightly beat the eggs.

Serves three. You can freeze this!

My Latkes Recipe LatkesUsing the grating attachment on your food processor, grate together 1 small onion, 4 large potatoes, 2 eggs and 1/2 cup matzah meal.

Spoon in latkes. Don’t crowd.

Fry three minutes on each side. Remove, place on paper towel to drain excess oil and serve ASAP!!

Add 1/8 t black pepper and 1 teaspoon salt.

Heat oil in a heavy bottomed skillet. Make sure the entire skillet is covered with oil 1/4 inch or more deep.

Drop in a tiny bit of batter. If it browns then you’re ready to fry.

28

You can reheat in a low oven and serve later ,or if you really have to freeze, but nothing tastes as good as fresh.

Safety note: turn frying pan handles inward and never leave a frying pan full of hot oil alone even for a minute. Also don’t let the oil smoke because that will spoil your latkes.

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Very Berry Delicious Trifle Trifles are fun way to serve dessert Very easy to assemble and sure to impress company.

Ingredients 3 package frozen strawberries 1⅓ c. confectioners’ sugar 1½ tsp. cornstarch ¾ c. heavy cream 3 container nonfat vanilla Greek yogurt Or 16 ounce whipped cream whipped (for pareve version) 40 ladyfingers 2 Tsp orange liqueur (optional) 1 package frozen blueberries Directions In a medium saucepan over medium heat, whisk together blueberries and strawberry juices with 2/3 cup sugar and cornstarch.

Boil until thickened, 4 minutes. Transfer to a medium bowl and refrigerate until cool, about 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, whip heavy cream to stiff peaks; set aside. In a large bowl, combine yogurt and remaining 2/3 cup sugar. Fold in whipped whip cream.

Break ladyfingers in half. Place half of them in a 2-quart glass bowl or trifle dish. Drizzle cookies with 1 tablespoon liqueur, if using, and dollop with one-third of yogurt mixture. Spoon half of berries over yogurt mixture, and then drizzle 3 to 4 tablespoons thickened juices. Layer another one-third of yogurt mixture over berries, followed by a layer of remaining ladyfingers. Drizzle with remaining 1 tablespoon liqueur and dollop with remaining yogurt mixture. Top with remaining berries and 3 to 4 more tablespoons thickened juice. Refrigerate until chilled, about 2 hours, before serving.

Preparation 20 minutes Serves 12+ Happy Chanukah to all

How the Jews Changed the World & We Don’t Even Know It

by Rabbi Ephraim Shore

This Thanksgiving, let’s give thanks to the Jewish people.

“The Jews started it all – and by “it” I mean so many of the things we care about, the underlying values that make all of us, Jew and gentile, believer and atheist, tick. Without the Jews, we would see the world through different eyes, hear with different ears, even feel with different feelings. And we would set a different course for our lives… Their worldview has become so much a part of us that at this point it might as well have been written into our cells as a genetic code.”

--- Thomas Cahill, The Gifts of the Jews The number of fundamental ideas and values the Jewish People have given to the world is truly remarkable. And it’s also remarkable how most people don’t realize

this.

We simply forget that these concepts and ideals were once not the way of the world. In fact, they were not only revolutionary but often at complete odds with conventional wisdom of the times.

As Paul Johnson wrote in The History of the Jews, “All the great conceptual discoveries of the intellect seem obvious and inescapable once they have been revealed, but it requires a special genius to formulate them for the first time. The Jews had this gift.”

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, let’s stop to appreciate some of the Jewish inventions taken for granted in our world:

1.

Sabbath Day: The Romans ridiculed the Jews for their idleness but we have none but the Jews to thank for

our weekend. Until the Jewish invention of Sabbath, every day, every month, every year was the same. We introduced the concept of taking out time to focus on the higher things in life and enjoying being and not just doing. Christians adapted the Jewish Shabbat to Sunday in the 2nd and 3rd centuries.1

2.

Peace on Earth: In a world that revered the warrior above all others, survival of the fittest was the highest value. If you could get it, you took it. The cost in human life was irrelevant. Judaism introduced the altruistic concept that peace amongst men was preferable to my tribe’s enrichment.

As the prophet Isaiah wrote, “The wolf will live with the lamb, and the leopard will lie down with the goat; the calf and

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young lion and fatling will be together, and a little child will lead them” (11:6).

And “They will beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks. Nation will not take up sword against nation, nor will they train for war anymore” (2:4).

3.

Universal Literacy and Education: In a world where literacy was a luxury enjoyed by the vast minority, the People of the Book taught that the pursuit of wisdom and learning was the highest pursuit and the right and obligation of every child and adult. No Jewish community existed without a school. Even the Greeks and Romans came nowhere near creating a written culture, 2 and the medieval world saw even greater drops in literacy.

The Church, ancient Greece and the United States not only discouraged literacy for some (e.g.

Blacks, slaves, non-clergy), but it took until 1918 for every US state to require students to complete elementary school. 3 It took India until 2009 to adopt what the Jewish nation has been practicing for 3,500 years.

4.

Sabbatical Year: The idea for academics and some professionals (20% of UK companies now have a career break policy, and many more joining the trend!

4) to take a year off every seven years to focus on academic advancement, comes directly from the Torah. Judaism requires every farmer to take the entire seventh year off from work to focus on studying, self-improvement and inspiration. One can imagine the impact of that intellectual focus on the entire nation.

5.

Justice for All: In a world where women, children, the poor, immigrants and other vulnerable members of society were systematically abused, the Jewish legal system was the first to protect the rights

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Without the Jews, we would see the world through different eyes, hear with different ears, even feel with different feelings.

And we would set a different course for our lives… of the underdog and the helpless. As the Torah states, “You shall not wrong or oppress a foreigner, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt. You shall not abuse the widow or orphan. If you do abuse them, when they cry out to me, I will surely heed their cry” (Exodus 22:21-23).

Jewish law ensured that every man and woman has the right to a fair trial, is innocent before proven guilty, and allows for no prejudice towards the rich or powerful.

6.

Monotheism: Judaism revolutionized the concept of God; from a belief in multiple deities and idols that require our sacrifice (even humans), are created in the image of Man and can be bribed and manipulated, to recognizing the One Infinite, loving, altruistic Creator who is the unifying source of the entire universe, who needs To advertise, call 718-513-9885

nothing from mankind, and is equally available to every human being.

7.

Infinite Value of Every Human Life: In a world of human sacrifice, murder of children (particularly baby girls), and wanton war and killing to further material gains, Judaism taught that every life is holy, created in the image of God, and of infinite value – even the old, the mentally or physically handicapped and the sick. If you think that is obvious, consider the practice of human sacrifice that was central to most South American civilizations until the Spanish Christians conquered them just 500 years ago.

8.

The Right to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness: While the founding fathers of America may have found “these truths to be self-evident”, in fact it was far from self-evident unless you were highly influenced by Jewish values (otherwise the Declaration of Independence in 1776 would not have been so revolutionary!). Many societies up to modern times have sought to limit individuality in the name of service to the state or religion or feudal lord (Communism, Nazism, many religions and all totalitarian regimes). But 3,000 years before 1776, Judaism introduced to the world that every human has the right, and obligation, to aspire to reaching his/ her unique goals, personal fulfilment and potential.

9.

Limited Governmental Powers: It took until the Magna Carta in medieval England for the first small limitations on the power of the ruler to be instituted. Until then despots of all kinds could and would take advantage of their citizens monetarily, militarily and judicially for their own gain. The king was omnipotent. The Torah was the first system to place limits on the powers of the monarch. His powers were overseen

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660 McDonald Ave., Brooklyn, NY 11218 P: 718.854.3500 F: 718.853.7059 Hours: Mon. – Wed.: 8 am - 5 pm • Thurs.: 8 am - 7 pm • Fri.: 8 am - 3 pm • Closed Sat. & Sun. Wishing everyone a Chag Kasher V’Sameach. We will be closed for Pesach, reopening on April 29.