Flatbush & Five Towns Buzz March 22 2015

Page 1

Bringing you the Buzz on Savings & Events

Volume 2, Issue 40

March 22nd 2015

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We’re getting out of debt. What would you do with your refund?

You may be eligible for up to $10,000 from tax credits, including the Earned Income Tax Credit (EITC). Join us for Virtual VITA Day, hosted by the Council of Jewish Organizations of Flatbush in partnership with the NYC Department of Consumer Affairs, Food Bank For New York City, and Bedford Stuyvesant Restoration Corporation and cosponsored by Senator Simcha Felder, Assemblyman Dov Hikind, and Council Members David G. Greenfield and Chaim M. Deutsch. To qualify for free Virtual VITA tax preparation, you must earn $53,000 or less. See details below.

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• The on-site tax professional scans and uploads your documents using a secure website. • An IRS-certified tax preparer reviews the documents and prepares your return. • The preparer calls you to confirm information. • After you sign or authorize the return by phone, the preparer electronically files the return. • You get a paper copy if you returned to the site or an electronic copy by email.

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by Sharon Duke Estroff

Sedering with Kids How to prevent your kids from asking the fifth question, “Are we done yet?”

P

assover Seders and antsy kids traditionally go together like matzah balls and chicken soup. Fortunately, it’s perfectly possible to prevent the fifth question (are we done yet?) and the eleventh plague (restless natives) from showing up at our Passover celebrations this year. Taking into account that every family has different comfort levels, objectives and degrees of observance, here are some tips toward creating a fun and meaningful Passover Seder that promises to captivate the interest of all kinds of kids -- wise, wicked, simple and just plain unable to ask: That’s the Ticket. Prior to the big night, make “matzah tickets” out of index cards. Award the tickets to children throughout the Seder for reciting the Mah Nishtanah, the Four Questions, answering tricky Passover trivia questions, helping little brothers and sisters make Hillel sandwiches and oodles of other desirable Seder behaviors. At the end of the evening let ticket-holders redeem their winnings for Passover related prizes (i.e. candies, plastic frogs, books). Keep the Karpas Coming. Grumpy kids and hungry tummies go hand in hand. A steady flow of karpas (a.k.a. carrots and celery) and kosher for Passover salad dressing for double dipping, will keep your kids happily

crunching away until it’s time for the main course. Give out Goody Bags. Keep your junior Seder participants happy and occupied with special plague goody bags. While you can purchase already prepared “bags of plagues” at Judaica stores and online for around $12 a piece, you can accomplish the same thing at the dollar store for a fraction of the price. Try plastic sunglasses for darkness, toy frogs, wild beasts and insects (lice and vermin) and kosher for Passover marshmallows for hail. Don’t Passover the Books. Visit a library or bookstore and stock up on Passover-themed books. Scatter them around the table for children to peruse during the longest stretches of the Seder. There are some great Passover story books with pictures for younger children and deeper insights for the older children. Have an Afikomen Search Party. It’s always the same story at my house: The big cousins find the afikomen and the little cousins get upset; the little cousins get a prize anyway and the big cousins get upset. By making the afikomen hunt a team effort rather

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than a competition, we can do away with such griping. Use post-it notes (strategically placed before the Seder) to lead the search party from one destination to the next (i.e. “Go to the place where Elijah will enter,” or “Pharaoh had frogs jumping in his bed,” see if there are any jumping in yours.”) The clues should ultimately lead the pack to the illusive dessert of honor. Be prepared with inexpensive “afikomen finder” rewards for the whole crew. Take Plague Breaks. Help kids stay focused and fidget-free during long Seders by periodically letting them get their wiggles out. Should your children’s attention start to stray from the task at hand, call for a “plague break” and instruct all antsy guests to jump like frogs or run in place like wild beasts. Have a Matzah Match. Before the Seder, write matched pairs of Passover words on index cards. For example, write “Hillel” on one card and “sandwich” on another; “ten” on one card and “plagues” on another. Keep going - four/questions; matzah/ball; Elijah’s/cup - until you have enough cards to secretly stash one under every guest’s plate. Sometime before dinner, tell everyone to lift their plates, look at the card and track down their matching half. (Hint: For children too young to read - or to understand the match mentality - cut cards in half

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using varying puzzle cuts and write one word on each half. When kids find a card that “fits” theirs, they’ll know they’ve found their match). Put a Spotlight on Stories. The true purpose of the Seder is to pass down the Passover story from generation to generation, but why stop there? Ask a few of your senior guests to come prepared to share stories about Seders past or about their own personal miracles. Furthermore, the more you learn about the inner meaning of the story of Passover, the more exciting you will be able to make it when telling it to children and adults alike. Talk about the idea that this is not merely something that happened to our ancestors but something we all experience as well. What does it mean to be enslaved? To be free? Young and old will have fascinating answers to such questions and discussion. Keep an Eye on the Big Picture. Sure, planning a kidfriendly Seder is liable to take more work than simply bribing our kids to behave with a pound of chocolate macaroons, or locking them in the playroom with a babysitter for the night. But we’ll know our efforts have been well worth our while when our fidgety children one day do the same for our fidgety grandchildren.

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by Adina Soclof

Raising Happy Kids by Letting them be Sad Don’t equate your child’s happiness with being a good parent.

W

hen I was little girl I was a pretty happy kid. I didn’t get upset too often but when I did I wanted to be left alone. I remember my parents, teachers or my friends trying to cheer me up. Adults and kids alike would expend a lot of effort in shooing away the bad feelings. They would say something funny to make me laugh and then exclaim, “There’s a smile!

You are already feeling better.” They would also try to explain why I should be happy. “Later we are having chocolate pudding for dinner. So you shouldn’t be so upset.” It annoyed me and made me feel guilty. I was feeling unhappy and wanted to wallow. I knew it wouldn’t take me long to pull myself out of my funk. I just wanted to do it on my own time. Looking back, I could never understand why people wouldn’t just let me be sad.

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Most kids feel resentful when parents work so hard to make them happy. It is frustrating to have to feel good when you are feeling bad, especially with the people whom you want to feel most comfortable. Children may also be confused about their emotions. They might think to themselves, “Something must be wrong with the way I feel, if my parents don’t want me to feel it.” Children also crave independence. That includes being in charge of their feelings and frame of mind. When parents try to dictate a child’s mood, even with the best of intentions, it interferes with a child’s need for autonomy. This can further frustrate children and drive a wedge between parents and children. So why do parents do this? Because deep down we think it is our job to keep our kids happy all the time and protect them from the vicissitudes of life. We also tend to equate our child’s happiness with being a good parent. When we work from this baseline we become enmeshed in our kids’ angry moods. We cannot stand to see our children distressed or disheartened. Sometimes we become so invested in trying to make our kids happy that we have a hard time accepting their rough feelings. We forget that they do not have an adult’s perspective. We may think they don’t have to be disappointed if they lost their ball game because they have years and hundreds of ball games to win. They don’t have to be hurt about their best friend being mean because tomorrow they won’t even remember that they fought. If they would just listen to us, they would always be smiling and contented. They would never have a bad day ever again! We are missing the point. All people have low states and high states, good moods and bad moods. It is part of the human condition. Our job as parents is not to make our kids happy all the time but to teach children ways to help themselves manage the inevitable ups and downs of life. They need to learn not to sweat

the small stuff through trial and error. They need to experience being grumpy for no good reason, a broken scooter, a missing baseball and the mistake that the bakery made when they delivered a vanilla birthday cake instead of chocolate. This will give them the tools they need to handle the big issues in life, being grumpy for no good reason, the car that won’t start, missing keys and when the blue hats that you ordered for your meticulous client are mysteriously red.

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Children need to find their own ways to deal with life’s bumps, and to pursue happiness and satisfaction in life. Not allowing them to be sad robs them of that opportunity. Giving them the space to feel and manage the rough spots they are experiencing provides your children valuable lessons in conquering life’s challenges with grit. References: Faber, A., Mazlish, E. (1999). How To Talk So Kids Will Listen. NY: Harper Collins.

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JOKES 21st Century Chametz Cleaning Tips submitted by: Kalman 1.. Open a new file in your PC. 2.. Name it “Chometz.” 3.. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN. 4.. Empty the RECYCLE BIN. 5.. Your PC will ask you, “Are you sure you want to delete Chometz permanently?”

Look on the Bright Side Herman and Harriet Epstein were sitting on the couch at home staring at each other. Recent empty nesters, this was not an uncommon occurrence. Harriet got up from the couch and went to the mirror and started staring at herself. “I don’t understand,” she said. “I’m only 50 years old but I look like I’m over 60. My face is all wrinkly, my back is bent over, and my hair is starting to thin!” Herman turned to Harriet and said, “Look on the bright side. At least your eyesight seems to still be working fine!”

6.. Calmly answer, “Yes,” and press the mouse button firmly...... 7.. Feel better? Works every time! Toying with Dad Moishe Rubin takes his four kids to a toy store. As soon as they enter, Moishe is given a free raffle ticket and oy, what luck - he wins a 10 dollar gift certificate! “Gather around children,” he says to them, “we’ve just won a gift certificate. One of us can choose a toy for $10.” “Yay!” they all shout out. “So who do you think should have it?” Moishe asks them. Silence. “OK then,” Moishe continues, “let me help you decide. Who is the most obedient amongst us? Who never argues or talks back to mommy and who always does whatever she asks?” “OK dad, you win,” they all shout. “You should have the toy.”

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Keeping the Stories Straight Rachel Rosenberg was visiting her mother in Florida when they bumped into Ethel Epstein whom they knew from back home. “Is this your daughter?” Mrs. Epstein asked. “I remember her when she was this high. How old is she now?” Without pausing, Rachel’s mother said, “Twentynine.” Rachel, 45, nearly fainted on the spot. After everyone had said their good-byes, Rachel asked her mother why she’d told such a fib. “Well,” she replied, “I’ve been lying about my age for so long, it suddenly dawned on me that I need to start lying about yours too.”

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OPPORTUNITY OF A LIFE TIME The Beginning

MevoMargalit Street that would house a temporary “caravan” for the use of the shul. After concerted efforts, the community managed to rent a suitable “caravan” and set it up on the allocated land. Of course, a lot of work was needed to upgrade the interior and to create an atmosphere of a shul. The young men rolled up their sleeves and got to work, painting and cleaning, scrubbing and fixing and within a short time a Centre for Torah and Tefilla was created. On Shabbos Yisro 5759, the new shul was inaugurated.

the architects, planning permission, the ground works, and the lowest level (basement) added up to over one million shekels (over $250,000). This was collected from our community members with great self-sacrifice. Finally, in Elul 5766 we were able to celebrate the “ChanukasHabayis” of our permanent shul in the basement. What an uplifting simcha this was, to actually be able to daven in a properly built shul as is fitting and correct. About two years later, after a further investment of over five hundred thousand shekels ($130,000), a beautiful ladies section was added. At the same time, the land around the shul was cleared and developed. We now had an outdoor yard for the shulsuccah and other communal uses.

In 1998, BeitarIllit was a spiritual wilderness for this special group of Yerushalmi Jews. There were no shuls that davenedNusachAshkenaz according to the traditions of Vilna Gaon and no suitable community for them to join where they could educate their children with these holy traditions. Shortly before Shevuos that year, a small group of these idealistic young men joined together and did something that at the time seemed doomed to failure. They advertised in the local newspaper that a new shul “Perushim” is being founded according to customs of the senior Yerushalmishuls. At first the services were held in a “kindergarten” that was used during the week for children’s education and only shortly before Shabbos was the classroom transformed into a shul. The first Shabbos davening was an unforgetful experience, where some of the finest Yerushalmiyungerleit finally were able to pray according to their traditions and customs. Only a couple of months later, in Elul of that year, the administration of the kindergarten regretfully informed the new community that they were unable to continue to allow the use of their building for Shabbos tefillos. The next few weeks, the davening took place in the dining rooms of these young men, each week another member offered his house to be used as the shul, until the local council agreed to allocate a piece of land on

Just over a year later, after the new “Hadass” district was completed and many more “B’neiYerushalayim” families, attracted by this new community, moved to BeitarIllit, again space became a problem. All these new young men chose “Perushim” as their main BeisHamedrash both for davening and for learning. A meeting was organised with the Rabbinical leaders of the town and under their guidance and blessings, a committee for a “Building Campaign” was set up with the intent to plan, design and build a large edifice to house all the growing community’s needs including a large shul. With tremendous Divine assistance, and after massive efforts of this new committee, the tractors began preparing the land for a permanent building to be erected. The costs of Stage 1 which included

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The Next Stage

Today

Our “Perushim” shul can boast today of the full gamut of services and activities as befits any frum community. Besides for tefillos, there are regular shiurim and learning programs, as well as various communal aid and assistance programs. Torah: In our beishamedrash we have a regular Kollel of hand-picked special yungerleit who learn all day. Added to that, there is an evening Kollel for the best young men who spend their evenings toiling over a gemoro too. During BeinHazmanim (Summer, Succos and Pesach vacations) we encourage all our bochurim and married young men to learn at least

43


half day in the shul, and a special program is arranged. Daily shiurim in gemoro and dafhayomi, weekly shiurim in hilchos Shabbos and other regular shiurim in “ChofetzChaim”, “ChovasHalevovois” and sifreimussar.

Youth Activities:

In the early evenings, every night, our “PircheiPerushim” – over 100 boys – come to shul to learn for an hour in their spare time. There are regular Tehillim groups, ShirHashirim groups and of course, every Shabbos and Yomtov the famous “OvosUbonim” where the boys learn with their fathers. On Purim, our shul hosts a large contingent of “Yeshivas

Mordechai Hatzadik”, and on Shevuos night, a special program of learning suited for children is arranged. Rosh Chodesh parties and Chanuka gettogethers are also part of the youth activities provided by our community. Avoida: Besides for the regular davening, our shul organizes “SimchasBeisHashoeva” evenings that attract people from all over the town and beyond. Nothing can compare to the original and pure simcha of these true Yerushalmi Jews. Just watching them, brings tears to the eyes and opens up the heart to spiritual heights. Purim night is another occasion where the authentic purity is evident in our shul as everyone joins to dance and

celebrate after finishing their seudos at home. The Lag Bo’omer bonfire is another attraction and is attended by hundreds of people.

GemillasChessed:

A trust has been set up to help any of the community members. This is sometimes in the form of regular stipends for those with day to day difficulties, or loans with easy repayment schedules for those struggling in the short term due to family simchos. The shul offers a free “Kiddush” preparation service for those making simchos on Shabbos.

The Future?

As the years have moved on, and the families have grown and are continuing to grow, the need to complete the building has increased. Recently, a few of the older members have joined together to revive the original committee and rejuvenate the old plans and to restart building until the whole edifice will be completed. After discussing the situation with building contractors, it is clear that for the relatively small sum of less than two million shekels ($500,000) we can accomplish our goal. Dedications are available for the shul, rooms, entrances, and ladies gallery. These may be in memory of loved ones, or in merit for your children etc. Building Campaign Committee Members Rabbi Pinchos Goldberg 011+972 53 3108636 Rabbi Moshe Uri Cohen 011+972 53 3109676 Rabbi Moshe Kugel 011+972 52 7600330 Rabbi Moshe Steinberg 011+972 52 7670013 Address: RechovNadvorna 33/4, Beitar Illit 90500 Email: 5805660@gmail.com

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Outstanding Passover Recipes Passover is in the air! Here’s a healthy and nutritious menu, including a variety of salads and not much frying. Avail yourself of fresh fruits and vegetables whenever possible. With a little ingenuity, one can easily create great healthy meals aiding to avoid the unnecessary weight gain that seems almost inevitable every Passover.

Kosher for Passover Mayonnaise This mayonnaise is easy to make and it is a real winner with young and old. It is great for a salad dressing. I make two batches because I have many uses for it. 1 egg 2 tablespoons lemon juice 1 small onion ½ cup moror ½ tsp. sea salt or salt substitute 2 cups oil Blend 5 first ingredients in a food processor with the all purpose blade, until well mixed. Add 2 cups oil slowly, until mixture thickens. Add oil if needed. With lemon juice, it will last up to two weeks in the refrigerator. Yield: approximately 3 cups Preparation: 10 minutes

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Chuck Eye Roast Chuck eye roast is a very tender roast that is tasty and soft. However, feel free to choose your favorite cut of meat, such as minute steak, Miami ribs, or butcher flanken for equally tantalizing results. Ingredients 1 3-5 lb Chuck eye roast 1 chopped Spanish onion ½ cup wine vinegar 3/4 cup honey ½ tsp fresh ginger grated ¼ tsp black pepper 3 cloves garlic crushed Directions Place onions on bottom of roasting pan. Place roast over onions. Combine remaining ingredients and smear over all sides of meat. Bake covered 2-3 hours at 350°. (Generally, I calculate ½ hour per lb. of meat), serve over a bed of mashed potatoes, or nokedlech. Preparation 20 minutes Serves 8-12

Salmon with sweet and sour leek sauce I served these salmon fillets recently and got rave reviews. Tasty while easy to prepare. Ingredients 6 salmon fillets 2 Tbs olive oil 3 leeks, well washed and chopped 3 Tbs brown sugar 1/3 cup lemon juice ½ tsp salt Directions Sauté chopped leeks in olive oil on a medium flame until soft about 10 minutes, add brown sugar and lemon juice and allow to caramelize for another 10 minutes. Place salmon fillets over this mixture and broil for 10 minutes on each side. Remove from oven and serve, or allow to cool and cover for later use. Tastes great hot or at room temperature. Serves 6

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Preparation 20 minutes

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Chicken Nuggets This is one of the most popular dishes with kids as well as adults. It is from the few dishes that I deem necessary to fry, because it is so delicious. Serve hot or cold Ingredients 6 chicken breasts 1 1/4 cups potato starch 1/4 tsp salt 2 eggs, lightly beaten 2 Tbs oil Directions Mix together the eggs, potato starch, salt and oil. Cut the chicken into nugget-sized pieces and dip into the batter. Fry in oil until done. ***Note: If the batter seems a little thick, add a few drops of water. If too thin, a little more potato starch dissolved in a tiny bit of cold water. This mixture can also be used to coat fish, eggplant, zucchini or sweet potato or your favorite vegetable.) Sweet and Sour sauce ½ cup red cooking wine ¼ cup sugar 1 cup orange juice Bring to a boil, and pour over the chicken nuggets, or use as a dipping sauce. Note: Use this mixture whenever sweet and sour sauce is called for.

Kohlrabi, Carrot, Squash slaw Kohlrabi is a good substitute for cabbage, which lends itself in many delectable dishes and being part of the cruciferous family has the same healthy properties. 1 large kohlrabi or 2-3 smaller ones. 1 large carrot 1 medium summer squash. ½ cup moror (horseradish) 1 small onion Grate kohlrabi, carrots squash and moror. Cut onion in strips and toss lightly. Serve over your favorite green salad, or as is. You may also stir-fry these ingredients and serve it as a side dish for fish or meat. Preparation time: 20 minutes Serves 2-4 people

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Never Fail Blintzes Sheets This recipe has become standard in our circle of friends because it never fails and yields at least 50 perfect blintzes that can be used in a variety of recipes. Use them thinly cut in the soup, or fill them with your favorite vegetable filling, chicken, minced meat or whatever else you have on hand. These blintzes freeze well and can be adapted even for cheese blintzes, when substituting the salt for sugar. Make sure the ones frying the blintzes don’t eat them all up. Ingredients

Yields 50 perfect blintzes Filling for Potato blintzes Ingredients 4 potatoes peeled and cooked 1 medium onion sautéed 2 eggs slightly beaten Salt to taste Directions

24 eggs 2 tsp salt ½ cup oil 2 cups water 2 cups sifted potato starch

Sauté onions until translucent, cook potatoes until tender mash and mix with onions, beaten eggs and salt until smooth. Fill blintzes with this mixture .These blintzes freeze very well. To warm up, remove from freezer and fry in oil before serving, or warm up in the oven, for a dietetic version.

Directions Whisk eggs salt and oil until well blended. In a separate container mix potato starch and water and then blend both mixtures. Ladle out a small amount to cover a heated oiled crepe pan. I usually use two pans to get faster results. They get done in 2 minutes, and need to be turned over for 1-2 minutes longer.

Yields 8-10 blintzes

Preparation 20 minutes

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WEDNESDAY

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