Letters from CAMP Rehoboth, Vol. 31, No. 5

In This Issue

Pride!

LGBTQIA+ IDK Regal in Rehoboth

C R E A T I N G

A

M O R E

P O S I T I V E

R E H O B O T H

June 18, 2021 Volume 31, Number 5 camprehoboth.com

inside 4 In Brief

24 It’s My Life

6 Out in Delaware

MICHAEL THOMAS FORD

DAVID MARINER

8 Intentionally Inclusive

What’s on Your Post-Pandemic To-Do List WES COMBS

10 CAMP News 12 Aging Gracelessly FAY JACOBS

14 Out & Proud

Full Equality – Our Time Is Now. If We Act STEFANI DEOUL

THIS ISSUE

Over the Rainbow

MATTY BROWN

FAY JACOBS

30 Health & Wellness Born this Way

MARJ SHANNON

Abolition of Gender Markers

20 Straight Talk Miss Rehoboth Beach: Out & Proud DAVID GARRETT

44 The People on the Gay Beach ROBERT DOMINIC

46 Stonewall MICHAEL GILLES

The X Category vs. the

18 Community News

94 Visting View

Heroes in the Night

32 LGBTQ+ YA

TYLER MENDELSOHN

36 Who’s That?

That’s CAMP! ANITA BROCCOLINO

Aqua Grill

By Any Other Name

92 Deep Inside Hollywood

The Ways the Balls Bounce

28 Dining Out

16 Visting View

34 Membership Matters

50 Volunteer Spotlight KAREN LAITMAN

52 Thank You

Letter from the CAMP Rehoboth Board of Directors

58 Words Matter LGBTQIA+ IDK

CLARENCE FLUKER

60 Before The Beach If One is Suffering

MICHAEL GILLES

22 Out & About

64 CAMP Houses

Easttown, Pa. Feels Pretty and Gritty … and Gay?

The Last Guest House RICH BARNETT

ERIC PETERSON

ROMEO SAN VICENTE

CAMP Rehoboth ImpACT

26 Hope for Future Change

JULIAN HARBAUGH

VOLUME 31, NUMBER 5 • JUNE 18, 2021

Tree Frogs and Afghan Shawls

66 How I Learned to Date Men

ED CASTELLI

KATE WILLETT

Jamal Sims

...After Dating Women

98 Celebrity Interview

70 Glowing with Pride

MICHAEL COOK

72 COVID Health

102 We Remember

FAY JACOBS

Impact on Underserved Delawareans

TYLER BERL AND JORDAN HINES

74 CAMPshots 80 Tiny Houses.

Big Futures.

D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

84 CAMP Arts DOUG YETTER

86 Booked Solid

100 Deaf Is Beautiful LAWRENCE FERBER

104 The Real Dirt

Permaculture: A Way to Live ERIC W. WAHL

ON THE COVER

Julia Sugarbaker II, Mona Lotts, Magnolia Applebottom, and Roxy Overbrooke.

Photo: Murray Archibald

TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

88 Historical Headliners

Transgender Pioneer Christine Jorgensen ANN APTAKER

90 View Point

Cutting Blue Out of the Rainbow

See page 70

Letters from CAMP Rehoboth welcomes submissions. Email editor@camprehoboth.com.

Photographs must be high resolution (300 dpi).

Documents should be sent as attachments in Microsoft Word®. Deadline for submissions is two weeks prior to the issue release date.

Letters 2 JUNE 18, 2021

RICHARD J. ROSENDALL

PUBLISHER David Mariner EDITOR Beth Shockley COPY EDITOR Marj Shannon DESIGN AND LAYOUT Mary Beth Ramsey ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Tricia Massella ADMINISTRATIVE SUPPORT Matty Brown DISTRIBUTION Mark Wolf CONTRIBUTORS Barbara Antlitz, Ann Aptaker, Murray Archibald, Tyler Berl, Anita Broccolino, Matty Brown, Ed Castelli, Wes Combs, Michael Cook, Robert Dominic, Stefani Deoul, Clarence Fluker, Michael Thomas Ford, David Garrett, Michael Gilles, Julian Harbaugh, Jordan Hines, Fay Jacobs, Karen Laitman, David Mariner, Tricia Massella, Tyler Mendelsohn, Eric Peterson, Mary Beth Ramsey, Richard Rosendall, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Marj Shannon, Eric W. Wahl, Kate Willett, D’Anne Witkowski, Doug Yetter

Letters from CAMP Rehoboth is published 11 times per year, between February and December, as a program of CAMP Rehoboth Inc., a non-profit community service organization. CAMP Rehoboth seeks to create a more positive environment of cooperation and understanding among all people. Revenue generated by advertisements supports CAMP Rehoboth’s purpose as outlined in our mission statement.

The inclusion or mention of any person, group, or business in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth does not, nor is it intended to in any way, indicate sexual orientation. The content of the columns are the views and opinions of the writers and may not indicate the position of CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. © 2021 by CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. All rights reserved by CAMP Rehoboth. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any form without the prior written permission of the editor.

The Way I See It

CAMP CAMP REHOBOTH REHOBOTH

MISSION MISSION STATEMENT STATEMENT AND AND PURPOSE PURPOSE CAMP Rehoboth is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit community CAMP Rehoboth is adedicated 501(c)(3) nonprofit community service organization to creating a positive service organization dedicated to creating a positive environment inclusive of all sexual orientations and environment inclusive of all sexual orientations and gender identities in Rehoboth Beach and its related gender identities in Rehoboth Beach and its related communities. We seek to promote cooperation and communities.among We seek promote cooperation and a understanding alltopeople as we work to build understanding all people as weforwork saferamong community with room all. to build a safer community with room for all.

We seek to promote community well-being on seektotofoster promote community well-being on allWe levels; the development of community all levels;totodevelop foster the development of to community groups; community space; promote groups; to develop community promote human and civil rights; to workspace; againsttoprejudice human and civil rights; to work againstamong prejudice and discrimination; to lessen tensions the and discrimination; to lessen among the community at large; and to helptensions foster the economic community large; helptoward foster the economic growth ofatthe area.and Wetowork these ends growth of theactivities area. Wesuch workastoward these ends through the following: through activities such as the following:

Fundraising for other organizations, Fundraising other organizations, such as AIDS for service organizations, gay

as AIDS serviceorganizations, organizations,recycling gay and such lesbian community and lesbian community organizations, recycling programs, environmental projects, literacy training, programs, projects, training, and otherenvironmental ventures for the generalliteracy betterment of and other ventures the general betterment of thefor community. the community.

Networking resources and information

byNetworking publishing a newsletter, as an resourcesand andfunctioning information alternative tourist bureau and by publishing a newsletter, andinformation functioningcenter. as an alternative tourist bureau and information center.

Promoting artistic expressions and creative Promoting artisticthinking, expressions and giving aid artists andthinking, craftspeople with an andtocreative

emphasis lesbians and gay men. and givingon aidthe to works artists of and craftspeople with an emphasis on the works of lesbians and gay men.

Education and outreach to the larger community, Education and outreach to the including sensitivity seminars, and printed largertraining community,

materialssensitivity to promote positive images and of gay and including training seminars, printed people andimages others. of gay and materials tolesbian promote positive lesbianpolitical people and others. to Promoting awareness

build safe and inclusive community Promoting political awareness to

BY BETH SHOCKLEY, EDITOR

BIG DOINGS THIS MONTH. WE’RE IN THE NEW SEASON, IT’S PRIDE MONTH, AND WE’LL SOON celebrate the 4th—especially since we’ll have fireworks this year! In the spirit of Pride, I’ve been remembering my first march in DC. It was the late 1980s and I hadn’t been in the city that long. I’d been out for a decade but had been living in South Carolina, where, if I’m remembering correctly, there were no Pride festivities at the time. So June of 1988 heralded my first real Pride, and it’s something I’ll never forget. The spirit, the camaraderie, the joy, the floats, the pumping music, the bodies on display. My partner and I jumped in the march, dancing and sweating our way down the parade route, waving at the crowd as they waved back.

A glorious feeling!

There have been many Prides since then for me. My best memory may be New York in 2004, on the back of my girlfriend’s motorcycle, as we led off the NYC Pride Parade. That was another first—another amazing experience. Also in New York, I had the honor of taking the woman who would become my wife to her first Pride. Warm, fuzzy hearts there.

When I moved to Delaware, I also got that joyful feeling—albeit on a less dazzling scale.

But our Pride celebrations are just as meaningful to me, and I go every year to our events in Rehoboth. So far, I’ve been able to catch the Queer Queens of Qomedy at the Milton Theatre— what an absolute hoot that was! And, if you haven’t yet visited Aqua, there are some wonderful surprises—find out more in Dining OUT. Pride has always been important to me, since I came out before many of the hard-won battles for our rights were won. It’s a celebration—and a touchstone marking how far we’ve come and how far we have to go. For me, Pride is a state of mind, that sense of freedom to just be who I am. But we’re all well aware that this is not the reality for all of us within the LGBTQ community. So I celebrate because I can’t afford to take Pride for granted. I participate in the hope that everyone can someday enjoy these same freedoms.

through voter information, education, and build safe and inclusive community registration; and analysis of issues through voter information, education, and and candidates. registration; and analysis of issues and candidates.

This issue celebrates Pride in all the many unique ways our community does. Some writers are remembering their first Pride celebrations, some wonder if you can overdose on rainbows. One writer describes how images from a childhood family slideshow helped him realize he wasn’t alone. We have a story about out and proud Kelly Smith, Miss Rehoboth Beach, who will be competing in the Miss Delaware pageant this month. And if you’re not aware of what happened at Stonewall, you can learn about your history.

PRESIDENT Chris Beagle VICEPRESIDENT PRESIDENTChris Wesley Combs Beagle SECRETARY Mike DeFlavia VICE PRESIDENT Wesley Combs TREASURER Natalie Moss, CPA SECRETARY Mike DeFlavia

We’ve also included two columns on the decision by the governing body for the New York Pride Parade banning police participation in New York City Pride events until 2025. It resonates here because of all the hard work CAMP Rehoboth has done for three decades—and continues to do—to bring the police and our community together.

TREASURER Natalie Moss, CPA AT-LARGE DIRECTORS Jane Blue, Pat Catanzariti, Jason Darion Mathis-White, AT-LARGE DIRECTORS David Garrett, Leslie Ledogar, David Mariner (non-voting), Jane Blue, Pat Catanzariti, Jason Darion Mathis-White, Tara Sheldon, andDavid LeslieMariner Sinclair(non-voting), David Garrett, Leslie Ledogar,

Tara Sheldon, and Leslie Sinclair EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR David Mariner HEALTH & WELLNESS PROGRAM Salvatore Seeley EXECUTIVE DIRECTORDIRECTOR David Mariner DIRECTOR Anita Broccolino HEALTH &DEVELOPMENT WELLNESS PROGRAM DIRECTOR Salvatore Seeley YOUTH UP COORDINATOR Barbara Antlitz DEVELOPMENT DIRECTOR Anita Broccolino

CAMP CAMP REHOBOTH REHOBOTH 37 37 Baltimore Baltimore Avenue, Avenue, Rehoboth Rehoboth Beach, Beach, DE DE 19971 19971 tel tel 302-227-5620 302-227-5620 || fax fax 302-227-5604 302-227-5604 email editor@camprehoboth.com | www.camprehoboth.com email editor@camprehoboth.com | www.camprehoboth.com

And, what’s in a name? Several writers tackle this question and the language we use to identify ourselves.

Plus, we offer stories about how CAMP Rehoboth is there for us in good times and bad, who’s hanging out at Poodle Beach, what’s up in women’s sports this summer, and—big finish—find out where you can meet the Queens on our cover!

Be well and enjoy!

CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. is tax-exempt under section 501(c)(3) of the United States Internal Revenue Code. Contributions to CAMP Rehoboth are considered charitable contributions for federal income tax purposes and may be deducted to the fullest extent of the law.

A copy of our exemption document is available for public inspection.

JUNE 18, 2021

3 Letters

CROP Volunteers Help Families—and Beaches— in Need

I

t was another hard-working and very rewarding day at the Food Bank on May 4. A team of eight CROP (CAMP Rehoboth Outreach Program) volunteers returned to the Food Bank of Delaware in Milford. Over four pallets were completed with boxes of nutritious food items for families in need all over Delaware. That's more than 300 boxes! As an added bonus, Senator Tom Carper happened to be visiting at the same time and saw first-hand the good work that CAMP Rehoboth does to serve the community. He knows CAMP Rehoboth well, and he greeted everyone and expressed his appreciation.

National Trails Day was Saturday, June 5, and a CROP team helped the Friends of Cape Henlopen State Park beautify the beach. On a gorgeous hot and sunny day, 14 volunteers walked each way on the main beach starting from the bathhouse and collected at least 40 pounds of trash and debris. Kudos to all who participated! ▼

Celebrate Milton Pride 2021 at the Milton Theatre CAMP Rehoboth is proud to be a sponsor of Milton Pride 2021, and there’s all kinds of great entertainment happening at the historic theater this month. June 18: Laugh with Julia Scotti, a nationally headlining comedian, former teacher, author, speaker, and woman of transgender experience. June 20: From Stonewall to Now: A Special Evening of Drag at the Milton Theatre. It’s a night of comedy, costumes, glamour, and FUN with your hostess, Mona Lotts, and her cast of world-class drag queens from right here on Delmarva! June 25: See if Kelly Smith, out and proud Miss Rehoboth Beach (learn more on page 20), takes home the crown at the 2021 Miss Delaware Pageant. June 26: The Judy & Barbra Show! Summer Orlando is Judy Garland and Barbra Joan Streets and is Barbra Streisand. Summer and Babs have taken this sold-out show all over New England, NYC, and Florida, and now—on the road across the US. Milton Theatre: 110 Union Street, Milton, Delaware; 302-684-3038; MiltonTheatre.com. ▼

Letters 4 JUNE 18, 2021

SPEAKOut Two New Faces at CAMP Rehoboth!

Welcome, Patricia Clear!

We welcome Patricia Clear to the CAMPSafe program.

From Philadelphia, Patricia joins our staff as an HIV Testing Counselor. After graduating from Peirce College in Philly, Patricia forged a background in crisis management. “I’m excited to work with CAMP Rehoboth because I wanted to continue to serve diverse communities in Delaware,” she says. You can find her at various sites across Sussex County, including the A.C.E. Peer Resource Center in Georgetown and Seaford, the Laurel State Service Center, and the Addiction Medical Facility in Seaford. Say hi to Patricia! ▼

Welcome, Julian Harbaugh!

CAMP Rehoboth’s Health & Wellness Program is pleased to welcome Julian Harbaugh (they/them) as a new parttime Youth Peer Leader. They will be working alongside our Youth Coordinator, Barbara Antlitz, supporting our YOUTH Up program activities.

Julian is a recent UD political science graduate who came to CAMP Rehoboth through their interest in LGBTQ+ community organizing and the invitation of friends. “My hope is to encourage the leadership of my fellow youth, help build intergenerational community support, and foster connections between different perspectives. LGBTQ+ people exist at every intersection of identity—we all have so much to learn from each other,” says Julian. Welcome, Julian! Read Julian’s YA column on page 32. ▼

A Celebration of Life with Pride In honor and memory of local artist Lee Wayne Mills, CAMP Rehoboth is hosting a new summer exhibit and sale of his works in the CAMP Rehoboth Gallery and Elkins-Archibald Atrium during June.

For more info, visit our website or email artshow@ camprehoboth.com. We also profile the artist and his works in this issue in CAMP Arts on page 84.

Dear Editor, The Southern Delaware Alliance for Racial Justice strongly supports HB75, a constitutional amendment that will allow the legislature to enact common sense, secure, absentee and early voting provisions.

The legislation passed convincingly in the 2019-20 legislative session and is on the ready list to be voted on in the current session.

The Delaware Constitution currently restricts the number of reasons that a voter can vote absentee—and seeking to avoid exposure to the coronavirus is not included as a legitimate reason. The Delaware Constitution is prescriptive: instead of just permitting absentee voting, the Constitution defines the limited circumstances under which absentee voting is permitted: military service, business or occupation, illness, or vacation.

Delaware’s use of emergency absentee and early voting processes in 2020 due to Covid proves that they are secure and useful.

There were no abuses, no fraud, no problems. The process allowed all people to vote in a manner consistent with their lives; something that polls open for only part of the day on a Tuesday do not allow.

Look at the facts. Turnout in our state for President in 2020 was 68.8%; in 2018, 65.6%; and in 2012, 65%. Permissive absentee and early voting did not distort or challenge our very competent election administration system.

Importantly, older people, those working with long commutes, those having child or multiple generational care challenges/responsibilities, multiple jobs, mobility issues, health care or business owners or first responders who work 12-or-more-hour shifts, or those who for any other reason want to ensure that nothing keeps them from voting will have a choice that legislation will provide. There is no partisan tinge to these normal issues of life.

Many of the obstacles created by in-person voting requirements (time off from work, transportation, healthcare, etc.) disproportionately impact people of color. No excuse absentee voting will help these communities.

During the 2019-2020 legislative session, the amendment passed with bipartisan majorities in both chambers. No facts have changed, Delaware’s 2020 experience supports it passing again, and a national controversy that does not touch Delaware should not change the result.

The Southern Delaware Alliance for Racial Justice urges the General Assembly to pass this especially important Constitutional Amendment. Delaware should be proud that, at a time when other states are seeking to suppress the right to vote, it is seeking to expand that right.

Charlotte King, Chair and Founder Clara S. Licata, Thomas Irvine Co-Chairs, Legislative-Advocacy Committee Southern Delaware Alliance for Racial Justice Editors note: At press time, it seems prospects are dimming for passage of the bill.

Send letters to the editor, 300 words or less, to editor@camprehoboth.com JUNE 18, 2021

5 Letters

OUT in Delaware

BY DAVID MARINER, CAMP REHOBOTH EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

Springing into Summer

C

AMP Rehoboth is open and it feels good! After a year of seclusion and many, many Zoom calls it’s wonderful to see folks in person hanging out in the courtyard, or stopping by to visit us at CAMP Rehoboth.

We’ve learned some important lessons from the past year, of course. We’ve found ways to reach more people through Zoom, we’ve expanded our social media presence, and even launched a YouTube channel. When we all needed to stay home, the CAMP Rehoboth team found a way to stay connected online, and we’ll continue to do that.

None of these things, however, can replace being together in person. I’m excited to see these activities return. We are back to hosting meetings in the ElkinsArchibald Atrium, and we’re even planning some fun bus trips—always so popular—for the fall.

The CAMP Rehoboth Chorus will be back in full swing soon. They have done a wonderful job with virtual First Friday performances over the pandemic. These performances are available on our You Tube channel. Now, you can watch these First Friday concerts online or in person.

The CAMP Rehoboth Ensemble will return for a concert in the fall. And the full chorus will be performing on President’s Day weekend. Find out more at camprehoboth. com/chorus or on Facebook: facebook. com/CAMPRehobothChorus.

When it comes to some large events, though, things may still look a bit different.

Our friends at Delaware Pride, for example, have changed the dates for this year’s festival. The Delaware Pride Festival was moved to October due to health considerations and concerns about being able to meet state requirements. Amanda White states: “In February of this year the board had to make a decision on the event date and start planning. There were many questions about state restrictions, and the outcome of the vaccination efforts.

The board felt it was better to choose a later date instead of canceling the event as others were doing. We are expecting Letters 6 JUNE 18, 2021

MARK YOUR CALENDARS

COMMUNITY EVENTS SUEDE CONCERT July 31 CAMP REHOBOTH SUN FESTIVAL August 29-September 5 REHOBOTH BEACH BEAR WEEKEND September 15-19 CAMP REHOBOTH CHORUS ENSEMBLE CONCERT September 24-26 DELAWARE PRIDE October 2 CAMP REHOBOTH BLOCK PARTY October 17 CAMP REHOBOTH CHORUS PRESIDENT’S DAY WEEKEND CONCERT February 18-20, 2022 WOMEN’S FEST April 7-10, 2022

FIND OUT MORE AT CAMPREHOBOTH.COM

this year’s festival to be a lot of fun and a chance for the LGBTQ community and allies to celebrate and shake off any lingering cabin fever.”

Our signature event, Sundance, will also look a little different this year. We are changing the name to Sun Festival.

We hope you’ll stop by CAMP Rehoboth, whether it is to see our amazing art exhibits, meet our new staff members, learn more about upcoming events, or even just sit and enjoy a summer afternoon reading in our courtyard.

Planning is underway for a week of activity that will include outdoor events, seated performances, and a few other surprises.

Our auction will be online again this year (with the exception of a few live auction items) so you will be able to participate in the auction no matter where you are located. Like Delaware Pride, we struggled with not knowing exactly how to plan given changing state and local guidelines. For that reason, we will not be having a dance this year, but we trust you will enjoy the events being planned.

Work on our other signature events is also underway. We are looking forward to the return of these events including the CAMP Rehoboth Block Party (October 17) and Women’s FEST (April 7-10). Be sure to mark your calendars for these events.

We hope you’ll stop by CAMP Rehoboth, whether it is to see our amazing art exhibits, meet our new staff members, learn more about upcoming events, or even just sit and enjoy a summer afternoon reading in our courtyard. We hope you will come by to see us soon! ▼ David Mariner is Executive Director of CAMP Rehoboth.

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7 Letters

Intentionally Inclusive

BY WESLEY COMBS

What’s on Your Post-Pandemic To-Do List?

I

t’s official…the CDC says fully vaccinated people can take off our masks and start to breathe freely again.

Many of us are asking, “How will we make the most of this long-awaited freedom?”

While visiting family in person or taking that long-postponed vacation are certainly at the top of the list, surviving a pandemic is a stark reminder that making the most of our lives matters more than ever. Instead of leaving it up to chance, I am channeling this pent-up energy towards being more intentional about where I spend my time and with whom.

Giving back to the community is a personal core value and comes in many forms, ranging from volunteering to making a financial contribution to support a local nonprofit important to me.

For those of you who share my passion for being in service to others, the past 15 months created countless opportunities to help those affected by the pandemic.

Times like these can be overwhelming and deflating because the needs seem endless and resources are limited.

I learned this the hard way over the years by simultaneously volunteering and serving on a committee—but I became mentally exhausted. The unintended consequence of these good intentions was not only feeling overcommitted but also wondering if I was truly making a difference.

My coach training has shown me that when you connect to what has meaning in your life, the possibilities are endless in terms of the impact you can have on the world around you. When clients are in a situation like this, I ask what they learned from feeling stretched too thin and see if it provides a different perspective. Hello, mirror—I am the client!

So I asked myself, “What does impact mean to me and why was it important? How Dr. Melanie Hicks defines impact really resonated with me: “Impact is the unconscious reaction the universe has to a consistent stream of authentic

Letters 8 JUNE 18, 2021

actions—whether that universe is your business, home, community or greater society. Impact is what happens when you adjust your mindset to transform point-in-time actions into a continuous way of thinking and acting.”

There is no right or wrong answer, but for me it meant being able to leverage my communications and project management skills to help an organization better achieve its goals. Others might say delivering food to homebound people fills their heart. Knowing why it matters honors my value of giving back and leaves me more fulfilled.

The issue is not if you can make a difference…I know each of us can. Instead, ask yourself what stands in the way of staying focused?

Understanding I could be a catalyst for change helped provide clarity for me.

Which is why serving on the CAMP Rehoboth Board means so much to me.

As most of you know, CAMP Rehoboth is the reason why my husband and I consider the Nation’s Summer Capital home. Before I agreed to accept the invitation, I wanted to make sure I could dedicate time and energy to make impact a reality at CAMP Rehoboth.

I consider it an honor and a privilege to serve alongside members of our community who share my passion for ensuring CAMP Rehoboth continues to be a

vital resource for the LGBTQ community in Sussex County and beyond.

I am constantly inspired by people whose actions (small and large) demonstrate an authentic commitment to making change a reality. A recent article about American Airlines’ CEO Doug Parker’s decision to honor Muslim employees by fasting for Ramadan is a great example of actions speaking louder than words. American Airlines has earned a reputation for being a company that values diversity and inclusion for its employees and customers.

Parker said he joined in a Ramadan fast in an effort to empathize with the carrier’s Muslim employees. “The core of fasting is empathy,” quoting from an invitation he received from a Muslim employee group. “Fasting helps us feel others’ pain, suffering, loneliness, poverty and hunger,” the invitation said. “In a way, it connects us as humans. Refrain from eating and drinking to experience what it’s like for Muslims to fast, and also to step into the shoes of impoverished people.”

Parker said, “I can tell you I was hungry—and really thirsty—by 8:30 at night. It gave me tremendous respect for our Muslim team members and their commitment to their faith.”

The issue is not if you can make a difference…I know each of us can.

Instead, ask yourself what stands in the way of staying focused? Understanding I could be a catalyst for change helped provide clarity for me. I look forward to hearing what’s on your post-pandemic to-do list! ▼ Wesley Combs, a CAMP Rehoboth Board member, is a diversity and inclusion expert, executive coach, and a passionate social justice advocate. He is the founding principal of Combs Advisory Services where he works with clients who share his values of enabling equity, equality, and opportunity in the workplace and the community.

CHRISTOPHER PETERSON’S

Also Catch Christopher in...

EVERY

OPENS JULY 4th

Labour Day WeekEnd Fri/Sat/Sun 9pm

JUNE 18, 2021

9 Letters

CAMPNews Letters at Delaware History Museum For the first time, Delaware History Museum is commemorating LGBTQ history with a Pride window display at its location on 504 N. Market Street in Wilmington. The display will highlight CAMP Rehoboth Community Center as part of the integral queer Delaware history in both its timeline and by showcasing current and archival copies from 1992 and 1997 of Letters from CAMP Rehoboth. The display will be up and running not only through Pride Month, but throughout the summer. ▼

Pride Celebrations Help CAMP Rehoboth Join CAMP Rehoboth every Thursday this month, 4-6 p.m., as Chesapeake & Maine/ Dogfish Head Celebrates Pride with CAMP Rehoboth as the beneficiary.

CAMP Rehoboth is excited to be tapped as one of Dogfish Head Craft Brewery’s philanthropic Beer & Benevolence program beneficiaries. As part of their giveback to the coastal Delaware community through creative collaborations with nonprofit organizations, during Pride Month, CAMP Rehoboth will be the recipient of a campaign at their seafood and cocktail spot, Chesapeake & Maine, in downtown Rehoboth.

For the month of June, Chesapeake & Maine will feature a keg-conditioned “CAMP Cocktail” on its menu. For every CAMP Cocktail sold, $1 will be donated back to CAMP Rehoboth. Chesapeake & Maine will also host weekly happy hours throughout the month of June with 10 percent of the proceeds benefiting CAMP Rehoboth. Look for details about these CAMP Rehoboth social and professional networking events posted on our website at camprehoboth.com and social media pages. ▼ Letters 10 JUNE 18, 2021

MARK YOUR CALENDAR

Tiny Beautiful Things Auditions CAMP Rehoboth is excited to announce its production of Tiny Beautiful Things later this summer. Auditions for this play, adapted for the stage by Nia Vardalos, will take place at 7 p.m. June 20 in the CAMP Rehoboth Elkins-Archibald Atrium. Actors will be asked to do a cold reading from the script. Please visit camprehoboth.com/events/tinybeautiful-things-auditions for more information. ▼

Streetlight Harmonies Available on Amazon Prime Streetlight Harmonies, a 2020 documentary exploring the sounds and stories of doo-wop music, is now available on Amazon Prime and features a CAMP Rehoboth member. The documentary looks at the evolution of doo-wop and the influence it had not only on other musical genres but also the civil rights movement taking place at that time. The story is told through doowop groups like the Ink Spots, the Five Satins, and the Shirelles. Locals may be most interested in the story of the Chantels, as CAMP Rehoboth member Lois Harris Powell is a member of the Chantels and is featured in the documentary.

Streetlight Harmonies is currently available for free on Amazon Prime and Vudu. The documentary can also be purchased in the Apple Store. ▼

YOUTH Up Webinar CAMP Rehoboth YOUTH Up invites all ages to Transgender and Non-Binary: A Panel Discussion on Gender. Wesley (he/him) will moderate as Julian (they/ them), Edward (he/him), Grayson (he/him), and Ashe (she/her) share their journey of gender. Through their personal experiences, you will better understand that gender is not one absolute. It is fluid and people are ever-discovering their true identities. Panelists are youth and young adults. Please share this event with your students, friends, and family. This will be on Wednesday, June 23, from 7 to 8:15 p.m.

Please direct any questions to Barbara at bantlitz@camprehoboth.com.

We are here for you.

We know these are stressful times, and we know that coming together and helping one another is how we get through them.

Jenn Harpel CFP®, ChFC®

As your Morgan Stanley Financial Advisor, I will help you create a plan that makes sense for you and your goals. With our knowledge and resources we will help you manage risk and keep your plan on track, so you can focus on all that’s happening in life.

Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971

Associate Vice President Financial Advisor 55 Cascade Lane +1 302 644-6620 Jennifer.Harpel@morganstanley.com NMLS #1310708

Contact me to see how I can help you or provide a second opinion.

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JUNE 18, 2021

11 Letters

Aging Gracelessly

BY FAY JACOBS

No Police in Parade? Shame!

Y

es, I thought I retired my opinion column. But a news article at the end of May punched me in the gut and sent me flying to the computer to speak out.

Police Banned from Participating in New York City Pride Events until 2025 What?

According to news reports, the governing body for the New York Pride Parade has banned police participation because “The sense of safety that law enforcement is meant to provide can instead be threatening, and at times dangerous, to those in our community who are most often targeted with excessive force and/or without reason.”

Look, we all know, and have seen video of very bad apples among law enforcement. And yes, we are in an era where Black lives certainly matter, transgender lives need the support of us all, and many other issues can cast a bad light on some law enforcement officers and departments.

But good God, let’s not throw out the baby with the dirty bathwater.

I remember years of attendance at the very New York City Pride Parade which now bans police from marching.

I remember the thrill I felt years ago seeing the Police Marching Band participating for the first time.

I remember 2013 and the bank of gay police officers gleefully accompanying Parade Marshall Edie Windsor the year she won her marriage equality case in the Supreme Court.

One year I found myself standing beside club legend Rollerena, who began skating on Christopher Street in the 1970s and who was now a senior drag queen still on roller skates. She was having trouble negotiating the busy street when a police officer politely asked some marchers to make room for her, so she would not get hurt.

I remember New York’s massive 50th Anniversary of Stonewall Parade, which turned into a gigantic international pride celebration, flooding the streets of lower Manhattan with literally millions of

Letters 12 JUNE 18, 2021

people and tons of rainbow gear. And I saw the thousands of police officers keeping the peace and helping clear the intersections as the deluge of people traversed the crowded streets and sidewalks. I loved seeing some of the officers cheering us on, smiling, waving, enjoying their responsibility to keep us all safe.

Who reading this recalls years and years of Rehoboth police officers congenially standing guard at Sundance dances and auctions at the Convention Center, at the CAMP Rehoboth block parties, and being responsive to every single call or communication from CAMP Rehoboth?

There was no them and us. I saw no incidents of disrespect. There might have been some incidents in a crowd that large, but we read no reports of trouble.

But closer to home, who reading this column can remember 25-30 years ago in Rehoboth? That’s when Steve Elkins and the fledgling CAMP Rehoboth met with Rehoboth Police to forge a new era

of cooperation in fighting boardwalk gay bashings and discrimination.

Who else remembers former Police Chief Creig Doyle and current Police Chief Keith Banks insisting on sensitivity training for their officers? It was a job that started as a chore for both CAMP Rehoboth staff and the officers. It turned into a warm, friendly session of ideas exchanged and friends made.

Who reading this recalls years and years of Rehoboth police officers congenially standing guard at Sundance dances and auctions at the Convention Center, at the CAMP Rehoboth block parties, and being responsive to every single call or communication from CAMP Rehoboth?

Following CAMP Rehoboth leadership, we all played a role in bridging the cultural gap between the LGBTQ community and the police here in Rehoboth. And the straight community.

And the other non-profits. And the business community. The list goes on.

I certainly cannot forget the police officers in full uniform, the police department flag at half mast, and officers openly grieving at the 2018 memorial service for the late CAMP Rehoboth Executive Director Steve Elkins.

Heaven help us if we echo the misguided decision by the New York Pride organization to break the terrific bonds we have nurtured with our local law enforcement.

And if you see some of Rehoboth’s finest along your way downtown, thank them and wish them well for me. ▼ Fay Jacobs is the author of five published books and is touring with her one-woman sitdown comedy show, Aging Gracelessly.

Photo: The late Edie Windsor, flanked by NYPD officers at 2013 NYC Pride Parade.

Windsor won the first Supreme Court case that year paving the way for full marriage equality

JUNE 18, 2021

13 Letters

Out & Proud

BY STEFANI DEOUL

Full Equality—Our Time Is Now. If We Act

I

t’s never wise to assume, but I’m going out on a limb and gambling that most of us know June is Pride Month. But if, perchance, you’re that one person who missed that memo, rest assured, the advertising community did not. It is now possible to overdose on rainbows.

We can stride our pride thanks to Converse, Adidas, Tevas, Toms, Reebok, Uggs, Vans, and (personally kind of charmed by this one) Doc Martens. Need a rainbow sock for that sneaker? Bombas and Happy Socks have got us covered— or at least our feet. Need other parts covered? Calvin, Ralph, GAP, Banana Republic, A Tribe Called Queer, Gc2b, Levi’s, Outplay, TomboyX, and so many more have a colorful outfit just waiting for us. So we can, ahem, wear it with pride.

We can even play with pride thanks to Lego and Disney. And of course, we can binge-watch with pride—thanks to nearly every streaming service. And don’t fret about our eyes burning from too much screen time; EyeBuyDirect and Zenni have rainbow-colored glasses for that!

Why, we could be our own horse of a different color from the Wizard of Oz. Toto, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore!

PRIDE. It’s a glorious word. The Oxford Dictionary defines pride as 1) a feeling of deep pleasure or satisfaction derived from one’s own achievements, the achievements of those with whom one is closely associated, or from qualities or possessions that are widely admired. As in, “the team was bursting with pride.”

Definition 2: consciousness of one’s own dignity.

On June 1, the President of the United States of America, Joseph Robinette Biden, Jr., issued the FIRST formal proclamation of his administration, telling LGBTQ+ people both at home and abroad that they should “accept nothing less than full equality.”

“I will not rest until full equality for LGBTQ+ Americans is finally achieved and codified into law,” Biden proclaimed.

“That is why I continue to call on the

Letters 14 JUNE 18, 2021

Congress to pass the Equality Act, which will ensure civil rights protections for LGBTQ+ people and families across our country.”

Or maybe just down Route One.

And that begs the question, why would an LGBTQ+ person, or a proclaimed LGBTQ+ ally, buy food from Chickfil-A? Why would our equality, if not our lives, be worth less to us than a chicken sandwich?

Because ironically when the presidential motorcade heads to the beach, strategizing about how to get the Equality Act passed, they drive by one of the harshest opponents of our LGBTQ basic rights, Chick-fil-A. And that begs the question, why would an LGBTQ+ person, or a proclaimed LGBTQ+ ally, buy food from Chick-fil-A? Why would our equality, if not our lives, be worth less to us than a chicken sandwich?

And this is not hyperbole. According to a Daily Beast investigation, Dan Cathy, the billionaire owner of Chick-fil-A, has joined with such fine folks as the Dick and Betsy DeVos Family Foundation and, of course, Hobby Lobby, to funnel whatever funds are necessary to defeat the Equality Act. Maybe you’re shrugging because after all, what can one person do?

Well, in 2019, Chick-fil-A opened a restaurant in Reading, England. Reading Pride, an LGBTQ organization, called for a boycott because of its foundation’s support of groups they said were hostile

to gay rights. One person, followed by another person, and then another, said, “I don’t eat there.” To this day, there are no Chick-fil-A’s in England. Anywhere. That’s what one person can do.

So maybe if we, and our allies, make it a point to not eat there, maybe even tell our friends why, then just maybe Rehoboth Beach, aka Gayberry, could also make a small, but important statement.

A statement that supports ourselves, our president, and our brethren across the globe—many of whom cannot make a statement safely.

Because if we’re following the money, we can grab a shower with Bath & Bodyworks (donating $1 million to support the Human Rights Campaign Foundation). Shave—whatever you need to—with Harry’s Razors (The Trevor Project). Get your glam on with Bliss ($150,000+ to The Trevor Project), MAC Cosmetics (Mac Viva Glam Line—over $500 million—HIV-centric since 1994), and Olay ($75,000 to The Trevor Project).

We can grab our Kate Spade bags (The Trevor Project), strap on our Apple (Encircle, the National Center for Transgender Equality, and others), Fossil (The Trevor Fund), and Skagen ($25,000 InterPride) watches. And yes, we can bring the pooch!—(PetSmart—$100,000 to GLSEN in 2021).

Let’s remember, PRIDE is about a protest. PRIDE is about believing in ourselves and our right to be human. And true PRIDE demands we accept nothing less than full equality.

And Skittles. Because Pride Skittles send a dollar per pack to GLAAD (if we buy them at Target, they earn GLSEN dollars, too). And, they’re super cool. ▼ Stefani Deoul is a television producer and author of the award-winning YA mystery series Sid Rubin Silicon Alley Adventures, with On a LARP, Zero Sum Game, and Say Her Name.

JUNE 18, 2021

15 Letters

Visiting View Guest Column

BY TYLER MENDELSOHN

By Any Other Name

I

For me, growing into my gender has meant first pushing away the compulsory femininity I grew up with, then trying to become more masculine than I am, and finally embracing that I am neither and both.

Letters 16 JUNE 18, 2021

grew up with an intuitive sense that there was more to my gender than “girl.” I was given the name Tyler at birth, and it felt right that I always met boys named Tyler.

When I was anorexic in high school, a family member interpreted it as starving away my hips and breasts because of reticence to grow up. They were right about one thing, but around 2002 or 2003, neither they nor I had a word for non-binary. Even today, I’m still processing the ideas I’d learned about masculinity and a certain type of white, able-bodied thinness. But back then, there wasn’t much public conversation about trans people at all—let alone genders outside the binary.

Things got even murkier because of my slow process of self-awareness. Up until getting sober in my late 20s, most of my actions were intuitive and difficult to verbalize. This didn’t help when people asked how I “decided” I was nonbinary.

I didn’t decide. I didn’t not decide. I tried different ways of being in the world.

I changed as the vocabulary available expanded what was possible. You can’t fully know something about yourself if you don’t have a concept of it—which starts with language.

I don’t know when I first used the word “non-binary.” I know that at Pride 2008 I wrote the words “soft PERSON” in marker on my arm; I was frustrated with what felt like too much pressure to label my presentation (“soft butch,” “hard femme,” “lipstick lesbian,” etc.) in the lesbian dating scene. I was in my early 20s and thought I was being subversive.

I don’t have a problem with the existence of the labels now, but I intuited that there wasn’t space for me in those words.

A couple of years before that Pride, I’d had my first concrete thoughts that my gender might be complex. In 2006, when I was a sophomore in college, polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) and high testosterone levels started causing facial hair. My response to the spironolactone prescription I was given

to offset the effects of testosterone—to not take it—was informative.

I once heard another non-binary person with PCOS say we shouldn’t discount the syndrome as a valid “reason” to be trans. I don’t think we need a reason, but I don’t know what would have happened if I hadn’t had it.

It made a non-verbal inkling a concrete thing I could point to. Yes, at first as “proof” for others—but also to help me understand myself.

I learned about my gender by trying different presentations. It started back in 2006 with sports bras—first one, then one on top of another. It wasn’t until 2013 that I realized binders aren’t only for trans guys. There was a brief period where I thought I was a trans guy. But imagining myself as a dude felt just as stifling as the ideas of womanhood with which I’d grown up or the lesbian labels.

For me, growing into my gender has meant first pushing away the compulsory femininity I grew up with, then trying to become more masculine than I am, and finally embracing that I am neither and both. As someone with a history of addiction who always wants more of everything, I’ve had to work through fears that this was just another excess.

I’m a bit of every gender—I want it all for myself—and I’ve learned to love this quality.

Some people might think this is just labeling—creating more boxes that normalize new gender norms. But in my own life, as conversations around gender have become more nuanced, it’s created space for me to be who I am. Language allows the material possibility of knowing, where otherwise our intuitions might become ghosts. ▼ Tyler Mendelsohn is a Baltimore-based writer who works in addiction recovery, a frequent visitor to Rehoboth, and loves books, music, friends, and cat-friends.

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JUNE 18, 2021

17 Letters

CommunityNews Kick and Roll It with Varsity Gay League

Suede is back!

Photo: CherylMazak

Yes, July 31—Suede will be performing at Epworth United Methodist. Check the CAMP Rehoboth website and Facebook pages for additional details. ▼

Freddie’s Bar Opening On Independence Day weekend, Freddie’s Beach Bar will be opening at its new location on South First Street. Formerly home to the Pond/Frog Pond, this spot will be a refreshing change of scenery for the restaurant. Many DC-area friends will recall that Freddie’s first opened its doors 20 years ago in Arlington, Virginia. So be sure to stop by and say hello to the wall full of Barbie dolls. Welcome to the beach, Freddie! ▼

Love to play kickball, or to just watch a game? Varsity Gay League is welcoming LGBTQ athletes and their allies to its first kickball league in the Rehoboth community. Varsity Gay League formed the first Queer + Kickball League in 2010. Since then, more than 20,000 players in 18 cities in the US have participated. Everyone is welcome regardless of experience or identity. The league focuses on providing value, creativity, and a supportive staff to help you succeed.

Games are played on Saturdays at 11 a.m. at Beacon Middle School in Lewes.

The new kickball season opens August 14 and 21 with two open-play (come check us out) games, then the fall season begins August 28 through October 23. Registration opens July 23.

Varsity Gay League Bowling’s fall season runs from August 19 through October 21. Registration opens June 28. Visit varsitygayleague.com for more info. ▼

Merging: Delaware SPCA and Delaware Humane Association (DHA) DHA and the Delaware SPCA will soon be one organization. Both long-standing leaders in the community, the two groups will partner to offer complementary services to pets and people and multiply their collective impact. The two groups have collaborated for many years on animal transports, pet food pantry events, and sharing of resources. Delaware SPCA, which has served the Delaware community for 147 years, will continue to offer adoption, low-cost veterinary services, and spay/neuter at its facility on Stanton Christiana Road. The merged organization will also include DHA’s current sites in Wilmington and Rehoboth Beach. By combining, they will be able to grow their programs and services, saving even more animals. The merger is expected to be complete in fall 2021 . ▼

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Letters 18 JUNE 18, 2021

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19 Letters

Straight Talk

BY DAVID GARRETT

Miss Rehoboth Beach—Out and Proud

S

hould you see Kelly Smith walking down Rehoboth Avenue, you would admire her confident gait, her attractive face, and the determination in her eyes. Kelly Smith is Miss Rehoboth Beach, and she will be competing in the pageant for Miss Delaware on June 27. She hails from northern New Jersey, having more recently come to Rehoboth to represent the town as an out, proud queer.

There has only been one state pageant winner who identified as LGBTQ. She was Miss Utah, Rachel Slawson, in 2020.

Kelly Smith would then be the second to claim the crown while representing equality, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. According to Smith, “it’s important to show everyone that LGBTQ persons can be a part of these pageants.”

Having come out as queer at the age of 13, the ensuing few years brought a gradual progression of back-and-forth from the closet. As a self-identified bisexual, Kelly feels she has faced discrimination by both straights and gays. As a result of those experiences, she has taken an activist stance in addressing such incidents of prejudice. Kelly has begun multiple LGBTQ chapters for domestic violence groups. She also hosts a virtual support group for LGBTQ victims.

Wishing Kelly Smith the best in the upcoming Miss Delaware pageant, we also are grateful for her advocacy and action in being a resource to many others needing it. Let’s hope we hear news of Kelly becoming Miss Delaware. It will represent a whole new level in which to be out and proud!

Trans-Forming a Better World

Among his remarks on June 1, President Joe Biden shared this about Pride Month: “Members of the LGBTQ+ community now serve in nearly every level of public office—in city halls and State capitals [Senator Sarah McBride], Governors’ mansions and the halls of the Congress, and throughout my Administration.... I am particularly honored by the service of Transportation Secretary Letters 20 JUNE 18, 2021

Pete Buttigieg, the first openly LGBTQ+ person to serve in the Cabinet, and Assistant Health Secretary Dr. Rachel Levine, the first openly transgender person to be confirmed by the Senate.

Let’s hope we hear news of Kelly becoming Miss Delaware. It will represent a whole new level in which to be out and proud!

“For all of our progress, there are many states in which LGBTQ+ individuals still lack protection for fundamental rights and dignity.... Our Nation continues to witness a tragic spike in violence against transgender women of color.... Some states have chosen to actively target transgender youth through discriminatory bills that defy our Nation’s values of inclusivity and freedom for all.”

Two of the key challenges to equality are those of violence against trans women of color and the outrageous laws being passed prohibiting trans girls from competing in women’s sports.

Thus far in 2021, 31 transgender persons have been killed by violence.

Twenty-five were trans women of color.

It is an unfortunate reality that many of them were involved in sex work in the cities where they lived. This reflects the circumstances these women face in attempting to find their place in this world.

Having been rejected by their families, most face homelessness and certain job instability, becoming sex workers in places where life itself is uncertain.

There was another Black transgender woman who recently died at the age of 37. Her cause of death has not at this point been labeled as homicide. Nona Moselle Conner survived a stabbing incident in 2016, where she was stabbed 48 times. Then she died suddenly on May 13 of this year.

David Mariner, Executive Director of CAMP Rehoboth and formerly of the DC Center for the LGBT Community, knew Nona personally. He shares that “Nona worked for Collective Action for Safe Spaces and No Justice No Pride, where she drew on her personal experiences with assault and violence to be a powerful advocate for the trans community. Unless you experienced the things that Nona did, it’s really impossible to understand the impact that level of trauma can have on your life. Nevertheless, she always had a word of encouragement for others, and was helping them even in the midst of her own struggles with employment and housing.”

On June 1, the start of Pride Month, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed a bill prohibiting transgender girls from competing in women’s sports in high school and college. Thus, Florida joined the growing number of states across this country having passed similar legislation.

This debate is heated, and definitive lines have been drawn between those who support it and those who oppose it.

The causes for discrimination against the LGBTQ community seem to grow unabated. We now have a president who will defend them, but bigotry has reared its ugly head in so many venues. We need to unite our voices and our actions to transform into a better world. Only then can we know that the rejected and marginalized of our world will survive. ▼ David Garrett, a CAMP Rehoboth Board member, is a straight advocate for equality and inclusion. He is also the proud father of an adult trans daughter. Email David Garrett at davidg@camprehoboth.com.

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JUNE 18, 2021

21 Letters

Out & About

BY ERIC C. PETERSON

Easttown, PA Feels Pretty and Gritty…and Gay?

I

t’s ironic that once I finally felt as though I could leave the house and do anything I wanted, I discovered a television show so addictive, all I wanted to do was stay home on the couch, glued to the boob tube. If you haven’t seen it, HBO’s Mare of Easttown might be the most perfectly constructed long-form murder mystery I’ve ever seen. And yet, I noticed about halfway through that the mystery was not what kept me coming back to the show to devour yet another episode. It was the people.

And not just people—specifically, the women. It was toward the end of the series that I realized that the four actors who consistently received top billing throughout were all women. And yet, Mare of Easttown never feels like a feminist story, simply a gripping mystery and character study that just happens to be about a woman with other women in her life. This is the rare program that probably passed the Bechdel test every five minutes without even trying.

Mare (Kate Winslet, who deserves all the Emmys) is a compelling hero. First, she’s truly a hero. Some have called her an “anti-hero,” but that’s unfair; her actions are heroic, she’s just incredibly flawed. She annoys a lot of people, but in Winslet’s hands, she’s easy to love— especially as the series moves forward and the tragedies she has lived through are slowly and skillfully revealed.

Mare’s BFF Lori (Julianne Nicholson) seems, at first, like the standard “best friend” character—there to listen while the more complicated lead sits there being complicated. But by the finale, we find that she, in her own way, is just as deliciously complicated as Mare.

Mare’s acerbic mother Helen is played with perfect pitch by Jean Smart, who is having a mini career renaissance on HBO these days (see also 2019’s Watchmen and 2021’s Hacks). She and Mare spend most of their scenes together bickering, but Smart finds every opportunity to show the audience

Letters 22 JUNE 18, 2021

how much Helen loves her family, which includes a teenage granddaughter and a toddler great-grandson.

The teenager is Siobhan (Angourie Rice), and she’s the daughter anyone would want: kind, intelligent, and responsible. The tragedies that weigh Mare down have had an impact on Siobhan, too—but she bears the burden much more quietly. It’s a difficult role for a young actor, and Rice acquits herself beautifully.

I suppose, as messages go, “queer folks are just like everyone else” isn’t the worst lesson for HBO’s global audience to learn. We could do worse. And still, as I was watching, I was reminded of a simple truth.

We’re not like everyone else.

Not yet, anyway.

Oh, and Siobhan is also queer. She might be a lesbian, perhaps bi—we only see her date girls—but she’s difficult to label precisely because the show never labels her or forces her to label herself. She just…exists. In the world of this show, her attraction to other women is probably the least interesting thing about her.

In fact, I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that Siobhan’s sexual identity just… doesn’t matter. Honestly, both her exgirlfriend and her new girlfriend could have been written as boys and played by men and it would have changed nothing about the show, except a few names and pronouns. Siobhan has about 99 problems, but being queer isn’t one of them. She’s out to everyone,

and no one seems to care either way.

Don’t get me wrong, as a queer viewer, it was nice to see that we existed in the world so painstakingly built by the writers and showrunners.

Without Siobhan, the show might have felt a little more artificial, a little…made for TV. Because we know we exist, and because we are human, we long to see ourselves represented in the stories we see. And Mare of Easttown absolutely included us. And they weren’t shy about it; the make-out scene with the new girlfriend was pretty hot, and the subsequent discovery by the exgirlfriend was super awkward (and then very funny, and then sort of touching).

At the same time, I’m not sure why, while I loved every minute of this show, I kept waiting for Siobhan’s queer identity to be central to a moment in the story somehow, even a fleeting second.

Surely not everyone in this flannel-clad, blue-collar town is thrilled with the out high school lesbian, I thought. Someone will say something, and perhaps that’s a moment when we’ll see how Mare rises to her defense or lets Siobhan fight her own battles, or something. But that never happened, because there were no battles to fight. Apparently, everything is up-to-date in Easttown, PA; they’ve gone about as fer as they kin go.

I suppose, as messages go, “queer folks are just like everyone else” isn’t the worst lesson for HBO’s global audience to learn. We could do worse.

And still, as I was watching, I was reminded of a simple truth: We’re not like everyone else. Not yet, anyway. ▼ Eric Peterson is a diversity and inclusion practitioner, novelist, and podcast host who lives in Washington DC and visits Rehoboth as often as he can. Visit rewindpod.com for more on the podcast.

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23 Letters

It’s My Life

BY MICHAEL THOMAS FORD

Over the Rainbow

I

write books for young people, which means I get a lot of mail from young people. Earlier this week, I got a message from a young man, 16, who is about to experience his first Pride.

He’s very excited about it, as he should be, and he asked me what my first Pride was like.

My first Pride was 31 years ago. The summer of 1990. I had recently moved to New York City, into a studio apartment on Carmine Street in the Village, about as gay a location as you could get. I was 21, finally on my own, and finally free to be out after years spent at a Christian college where coming out meant being kicked out or, as a friend was, subjected to an exorcism.

I didn’t yet have many gay friends, so I went to that first Pride with my lesbian friend Mary and some of her friends. I remember lots of speeches about HIV/ AIDS. I remember Dykes on Bikes starting off the parade and how much fun they were. I remember rainbow everything, everywhere.

I also remember thinking that for something I had been looking forward to for years, it was oddly unexciting. For

most gay men, the highlight seemed to be the Sunday closing dance on the Christopher Street Pier. Mary and I had tickets for that, but after just a few songs it became clear that we weren’t really fitting in with the shirtless, buff men around us, so we left.

I went to Pride once or twice more during my years in New York, but it was never the major event for me that it seemed to be for so many. And in the years since, despite living in cities including Boston, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Houston, I’ve never gone again. I did try to go to Pride in Toronto once, and flew there to stay with a friend and go to the celebration with him and his friends.

But I ended up taking a nap instead, which earned me the enduring nickname of “The Boy Who Slept Through Pride.”

Don’t get me wrong. I think Pride is great. In theory. And every year when June rolls around again, I find myself wishing I could be more excited about it. I mean, I am, in a general way. I love that we have it. I love that most everyone else is so excited about it. I especially love when people who are about to experience their first one talk about it,

Enjoy your parades, and your cookouts, and your friends. Dance the nights away. Wear rainbow everything. And through all of it, remember that the important thing is that we let each other be who we are, whoever and whatever that is.

Photo by Brian Kyed on Unsplash

Letters 24 JUNE 18, 2021

and when people who have been going for years and years still find it absolutely thrilling.

But then I remember the heat. And the crowds. And the rainbows. So. Many.

Rainbows.

Not being incredibly excited about Pride is not precisely a problem. Nobody cares if I go or not. But Cubby, who came out later in life, has never been to Pride and would like to go. This year the closest city to us with a Pride celebration is still holding it virtually, so it’s not an issue. And the one local event that’s happening (a happy hour at a nearby restaurant we happen to love) should be small enough and short enough that I won’t grow weary of it.

Next year is a different story. Assuming nothing new comes along to put a stop to in-person events, Pride will return in full force. Cubby will want to go. And given his love for all things colorful, he will definitely want to wear a rainbow something or other. Probably overalls.

Which will look fantastic on him. And so I’ll go. And I bet I’ll have a great time, as long as it’s not too hot. I have a whole year to practice, so it should be fine.

I love picturing the young man who wrote to me going to his first Pride celebration. I can’t even imagine what it would have been like to be able to go at his age. I hope it’s everything he wants it to be, and more. I hope he finds the community he wants, and that they welcome him with open arms.

And I hope all of you reading this have the best Pride ever, whether you go out, stay home, or watch it all online.

Enjoy your parades, and your cookouts, and your friends. Dance the nights away.

Wear rainbow everything. And through all of it, remember that the important thing is that we let each other be who we are, whoever and whatever that is. ▼

Michael Thomas Ford is a much-published Lambda Literary award-winning author. Visit Michael at michaelthomasford.com.

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JUNE 18, 2021

25 Letters

A CALL TO PROTECT TRANS STUDENTS

BY MATTY BROWN

Hope for Future Change This is the final installment of a three-part series on the Christina School District’s action to secure the rights, safety, and well-being of transgender students.

T

o mark the start of Pride Month, President Biden issued a proclamation that responded, in part, to the estimated 30 states drafting discriminatory bills targeting trans youth in schools, especially in athletics. “For all of our progress, there are many states in which LGBTQ+ individuals still lack protections for fundamental rights and dignity in hospitals, schools, public accommodations, and other spaces,” said the president. It’s a reminder that to fully celebrate Pride Month, every member of the queer community must be advocated for and protected.

Not all public schools in Delaware have protections for trans and nonbinary students, even as the First State is surrounded by districts with explicit policies. Earlier this year, the Christina School Board did enact a policy to protect trans and non-binary students within its public schools. As a remarkable precedent for Delaware’s statewide guidelines, parents, teachers, and students have shared their perspectives and hopes for future change. But like any solution to a longstanding problem, the steps forward require more than just policy.

“The action steps are driving education, awareness, and community involvement before we shift to policy and procedure,” said CAMP Rehoboth Youth Coordinator Barbara Antlitz. In other words, the community must be actively educated around trans youth issues, aware of and empathetic for the needs of local youth, and involved in grassroots programs to bolster both moving forward.

Like Letters, resources including the Trevor Project and the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) give the community opportunities to spread education and awareness. The Trevor Project, for example, promotes advocacy, education,

Letters 26 JUNE 18, 2021

guidance on how to make one’s language more inclusive, and more.

“It’s getting those people who don’t even know they’re being silent to use their voice for good,” said Andrea Rashbaum, mother of a transgender child and an English teacher in Delaware.

Rashbaum points to community programming like drag queen reading hour at libraries, which can be requested by parents, as one such initiative. She also points to the HRC’s event, “I Am Jazz Day,” where public readings share aloud the book of the same name that follows Jazz Jennings, a YouTube personality, trans youth, and HRC Youth Ambassador.

CAMP Rehoboth encourages the public to stay engaged by continuing to self-educate. A great place to start is to register for the June 23 Transgender and Non-binary Panel Discussion on Gender webinar where an audience will listen to and get to know five trans and non-binary youth as they share their stories and perspectives about how gender is not absolute, but instead a fluid concept. Email bantlitz@camprehoboth.com to register for this event.

“Once you have people at the community level who recognize the LGBTQ community as real people, then they are willing to help,” said Rashbaum.

Taking such steps, Delaware residents will be better positioned to push for statewide guidelines that will grant trans and non-binary students protections in public schools. This means extending Christina’s policy for protecting students’ names/pronouns in classrooms, keeping confidentiality regarding parents when necessary, allowing access to appropriate facilities, and allowing athletes to compete with the team that matches their gender identity.

Fortunately, there’s action occurring on several fronts that is driving this change.

In response to the variety of lawsuits in the court system, the Obama administration’s interpretation of Title IX widened the scope of sex-based discrimination to include protections for trans students.

Court cases around the country are also favoring trans and non-binary youth. That

includes the case Doe v. Boyertown, in which the 3rd Circuit Court of Appeals (a federal court with jurisdiction over Delaware) decided in favor of protecting trans students against discrimination.

Last summer, the US Supreme Court interpreted Title VII in a landmark case to protect trans individuals in the workplace.

In addition, the Biden administration continues to push the Equality Act, which calls on existing civil rights law to protect sexual orientation and gender identity.

In Delaware, Christina’s policy has codified what is already law. Rashbaum says she hopes other districts will look at Christina’s example and adopt a trans youth protection policy.

“The group of parents coming in, no longer being cowed by stigma or religious affiliations, are stepping up and saying ‘I’m completely proud of my child as they are, and they should get rights like everyone else...’”

Further, a political front with elected LGBTQ officials like State Senator Sarah McBride and State Representative Eric Morrison may signal hope for future legislation. With the case precedent clearly in favor, making these protections explicit through statewide guidelines should not be a far reach.

Additionally, parents drive advocacy forward.

“The group of parents coming in, no longer being cowed by stigma or religious affiliations, are stepping up and saying ‘I’m completely proud of my child as they are, and they should get rights like everyone else,’” said the mother of a trans child who recently moved back to Delaware after growing up here.

In fact, growing parental support and understanding can have tremendous influence on protections for youth. As the mother explained, “the fierceness of love can go a long way.”

“I think it’s recognizing that no matter who it is, everybody has fears and hopes. We don’t want to prey on their fears, and we want to help them fulfill their hopes,” said Rashbaum.

That’s why giving students active roles in the solution is so important. For the three students interviewed in last month’s issue of Letters, the solution starts in the classroom.

“It should be the case where guidelines are needed for adding LGBTQ+ education in schools,” said an alum of the Red Clay school district. The alum, a non-binary graduate who uses they/ them pronouns, worked with their Gender and Sexuality Alliance (GSA) and health teacher to include LGBTQ subject matter in sexuality discourse, and to acknowledge trans students in health class.

A trans senior at a Sussex high school also worked with his health class instructor through his GSA. “Our teacher would talk about LGBTQ+ health, but only if asked,” said the senior, noting that it should be a standard practice.

To this, Antlitz noted that many “schools are only allowed to teach cis gendered-centered health and sex education,” she said, adding, “Bringing in resources like Planned Parenthood are crucial to raise more LGBTQ awareness in the classroom.” Unfortunately, leaving the decision to partner with Planned Parenthood to the health instructor often leads to inaction.

Beyond classes, the culture of education also needs to shift.

“We shouldn’t split everything by the gender-binary,” said a third student, a trans middle schooler. Discovering her gender identity early on, she recognizes just how categorizing by only male or female “is disrespectful and outdated,” she said. In early education, the gender-binary dictates many routine classroom activities like lining up for recess by gender and enforces gender norms through dress codes. This sparks insecurity for folks still discovering their gender identity.

In the future, the mother who returned to Delaware says, “In 10 years, I want to look back and say, ‘was there really a time we didn’t say gay, lesbian, queer in the classroom? Even if the teacher was a lesbian?’ I want everything that I’ve said and written on the subject to sound so outdated that I sound old-fashioned.”

Likewise, harnessing that hope, revisiting this column in 10 years should, fingers crossed, be a productive exercise in tracking progress, language, and education for trans and non-binary youth. ▼ Matty Brown is a gay man, journalist, and Operations Administrator at CAMP Rehoboth. This article was made possible through consultation with Barbara Antlitz, Youth Coordinator of YOUTH Up, CAMP Rehoboth’s youth program.

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JUNE 18, 2021

27 Letters

Dining Out

BY FAY JACOBS

Enjoy the Renaissance of Aqua Grill

I

Here’s a scoop. Aqua, always known for great drinks, hunky servers, and hot (in all senses) happy hours, now has wonderful food, too.

Letters 28 JUNE 18, 2021

don’t know why I had not met Kevin McDuffie before last week. He’s one of the owners of Aqua and during our recent dinner together we realized we’ve known the same people, gone to the same events, and followed a similar joyous path in Rehoboth for over 20 years.

Needless to say, Bonnie and I had a great time dining with Kevin on the newly redone deck at the nicely renovated venue. It was a busy Tuesday night, sweatshirt weather, with a healthy crowd and a terrific band playing.

Here’s a scoop. Aqua, always known for great drinks, hunky servers, and hot (in all senses) happy hours, now has wonderful food, too. It doesn’t hurt that the menu was designed as a collaboration with Rehoboth superstar chef Lion Gardner (formerly of the Blue Moon) and Kevin, who loves restaurant dining, growing produce and herbs behind Aqua, and making both Baltimore crab cakes and key lime pie.

We sat at my favorite corner table by the street, where we could hear the band (Hot Sauce) but still hear our own conversation. We learned all about how Aqua survived COVID by using tenting, following the rules, and doing the best they could. Now, everything is back in full swing, COVID requirements are lifted, and the place is set for a banner summer season.

Naturally, we started off with cocktails, including Aqua’s signature drinks—a Rose Kennedy-like pink drink (yum) and the delightfully-named Helen Haze, with cucumber vodka and pink lemonade. Brilliant AND yummy.

Then, an amazing thing happened.

Kevin asked if I wanted to use the QR code to get the menu. Do I lie? This writer had no idea how to do that. I know, I’m old. But I was willing to learn.

I’ve seen the codes for eons, but never bothered to use this technology. Kevin instructed me, and voilà! I saw the menu and learned a new skill. Although our server Clay brought us a hard copy just in case.

As for the dining, we sampled a variety of fare, including the warm soft pretzels (warm and soft as advertised) for dipping in the Buffalo Chicken dip—spicy hot! The pretzels are also great in the bumpy mustard served with them. Then there were the really tasty, perfectly crispy crab cake egg rolls with Asian slaw. While we didn’t try the Loaded Waffle Fries appetizer, the crunchy waffle fries did come with our crab cake sandwich—so imagining them under the crab, melted cheese, and Old Bay seasoning is not difficult. Next time!

Both of our sandwiches, the crab cake and the Buttermilk Fried Chicken (an enormous, hang-over-the-bun cutlet), were delicious and were presented beautifully. I loved the classic Caesar salad with my sandwich, which bodes well for the menu’s salad selections, featuring locally sourced (even from Aqua’s back garden) ingredients.

Aqua combines quintessential bar food (but gourmet in preparation!) with healthy salads like a Caprese, Greek and Aqua Cobb. And they make their own dressings, in-house.

Despite not needing one more bite of food, we succumbed to taking at least a taste of the Key Lime Pie, made by Kevin himself. Awesome. Thought I was in Key West, minus the cruise ships. Luckily.

Save room for the pie.

By the way, that big gorgeous Aqua deck is also the site of yoga on Sunday mornings. Who knew? I love the idea.

So here I am, looking forward to my next Aqua visit…yes, for the drinks, yes for a gorgeous night under their gigantic umbrellas, yes to see all my friends after all this time—but this year, it’s also to dine on the goodies from the Aqua kitchen. And that’s good news, indeed. ▼

b

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f l e s r ou ey JUNE 18, 2021

29 Letters

health+wellness

By Marj Shannon

Born This Way

I

’ve thought a lot about pride recently, in the run-up to this issue of Letters. Given I write a health and wellness column, it might not be immediately obvious why that’d be the case. But there is a link: pride is an important component of good health.

It’s key to self-care; people who are feeling good about themselves are more likely to pursue healthy habits and avoid unhealthy ones. Also, people who take pride in themselves often are more emotionally resilient.

I wondered how my own feelings of pride might contribute to my efforts to live a healthy life. That required I first identify what I feel proud of. My list included career accomplishments, academic achievements, and life obstacles I’ve overcome. It didn’t include personal attributes, such as my blue eyes. Or my bisexuality.

That’s not surprising: my siblings and I were raised to take pride in things we did, not things we were. It would not have occurred to any of us to take pride in our blue eyes. One didn’t take pride in something one did nothing to achieve. We were blue-eyed. So what?

When (as a tween) I realized I was attracted to both girls and boys, I incorporated that characteristic into my sense of self much as I had incorporated my blue eyes: something innate; something immutable. I hadn’t “achieved” bisexuality, so it was not something I was proud of.

But—blessedly—it also was nothing I was ashamed of.

Of course, this aspect of myself was not readily apparent; perhaps if it had been, I’d have learned shame. But I grew up in an era (and family) where one was silent about all-things-sexual.

My silence was the norm, and my bisexuality simply passed unnoticed.

By the time I was bringing a girlfriend along on a weekend visit with my parents, I was an adult and the family had embraced a “don’t ask, don’t tell” stance. That approach had been invoked when one of my brothers

Letters 30 JUNE 18, 2021

arrived for a visit with both his wife and his girlfriend. Perhaps his ménage à trois had set the bar so high that my arrival with a girlfriend barely registered on the parental radar.

In any case—no pride; no shame.

Just a fact of life.

I wondered if perhaps, to actively take pride in what one is (rather than just in what one does) one had first to have felt ashamed—or at least “less than”—as a result of being who they are.

Perhaps, if I had been stigmatized… for my sexuality, I would have had to overcome the resultant feelings of shame or selfrevulsion.

I didn’t need to be proud of my blue eyes: I wasn’t bullied for having them; the faith I was raised in didn’t teach that having blue eyes was sinful. My family wasn’t ashamed of me because of them; no one made me hide my blue eyes behind dark glasses or tinted contacts. Similarly, I escaped being ostracized or shunned or vilified for being bi.

Perhaps, if I had been stigmatized for my blue eyes or my sexuality, I would have had to overcome the resultant feelings of shame or self-revulsion.

Perhaps I’d have struggled to embrace those aspects of myself. Then, I might well have felt pride in those attributes— not so much because I had them, but because I’d prevailed in the face of prejudice and found them lovable. I’d be proud of having survived—even thrived—despite having a trait some

found distasteful—or worse.

I am only too aware that many LGBTQ people—stigmatized, banished, subjected to conversion therapies, and threatened with eternal damnation— have engaged that struggle.

I wondered if I were singularly fortunate in my experience. I consulted a convenience sample of family and friends I knew to be LGBTQ to ask about their experiences; I got a range of responses.

Several had observed the same silence I had, letting realization gradually dawn among their friends and family and co-workers. They simply lived their lives—their truths— revealing themselves daily but without fanfare. Others were more forthright: my brother let us know there would be two grooms and no bride at his wedding. My niece’s Facebook birthday greetings to her “elder daughter” alerted us to her eldest child’s transition from Jeff to Holly.

Asked about pride or shame, some spoke of the first time they’d walked in a Pride parade or had explicitly told someone they were gay or lesbian.

Some spoke of once having believed their sexual orientation was “unnatural,” or of being dismayed when someone recognized them for what they were— sometimes, even before they had admitted as much to themselves. Some spoke not of pride or shame, but rather, of simple self-acceptance—a precursor of pride that easily transcended shame.

Each journeyed from realization to acceptance; no one made the trip unscathed.

But notably, we all arrived: we are living authentic lives, embracing all aspects of ourselves. We are—in a word—proud. Whatever your truth, I hope you are, too. ▼ Marj Shannon is an epidemiologist and writer. She can be reached at marjshannon01@gmail.com.

Classes & Events—All Coming to You via Zoom LGBTQ+ YOUNG ADULT DISCUSSION GROUP CAMP Rehoboth and NAMI Delaware are pleased to announce a new, virtual discussion group designed specifically for young 18- to 25-year-old LGBTQ+ adults.

The group will meet via Zoom every third Wednesday of the month at 7 p.m. This group is free, confidential, and peer-led. Contact Barbara Antlitz at Bantlitz@camprehoboth.com.

MONTHLY GRIEF GROUP June 17 at 3:00 p.m.

The purpose of these one-hour sessions is to provide a safe and healing place for those struggling with grief. Among other things, the group offers people who are grieving the opportunity to be with others who are also are on the grief journey, fellow travelers on the same road.

Register by emailing group leader Kevin Bliss at: kevin@kevinblisscoaching.com.

MINI-GOLF MONDAYS Join us as we travel down Route 1 from Lewes to Ocean City and spend the summer playing mini-golf (you know you wanna show off those mini-golf moves!). The games are on us, and PRIZES WILL BE AWARDED! Evening fun starts at 6:30 p.m. We are limited to 12 players at each of our courses.

Contact Salvatore at 302-227-5620 or salvatore@camprehoboth.com to sign-up and for more information.

6/21: Seashell Shop on Hwy 1 7/12: Ryan’s Mini-Golf in Rehoboth 7/26: Jungle Jim’s in Rehoboth 8/9: Nick’s Mini-Golf 8/23: Lost Treasure Mini-Golf, Ocean City LGBTQ+ BLACK, INDIGENOUS, AND PEOPLE OF COLOR MEETING June 22 at 7:00 p.m.

Join us as for a peer-led social and discussion group for LGBTQ+ BIPOC in Delaware. This

meeting will be in person at CAMP Rehoboth.

Our mission is to build a united front of diverse LGBTQ+ BIPOC community members for our social, political, and economic advancement by forming a hub for Delaware LGBTQ+ life.

MORNING MINDFULNESS

TRANSGENDER AND NON-BINARY: A PANEL DISCUSSION ON GENDER

CHAIR YOGA

June 23 at 7:00 p.m.

Join us for Chair Yoga with Erin. Everyone can access the health benefits of yoga as you learn to synchronize conscious breath and mindful movement. The sequence of poses is designed to energize and strengthen, as well as relax and lengthen muscles. You’ll also reduce anxiety and stress, and support your overall well-being.

Wesley (he/him) will moderate, as Julian (they/ them), Edward (he/him), Grayson (he/him), and Ashe (she/her) share their journey of gender. Through their personal experiences, you will better understand that gender is not one absolute. It is fluid and people are everdiscovering their true identities. Panelists are youth and young adults.

This will be a virtual discussion. For more information, email Barbara at bantlitz@ camprehoboth.com.

CAMP REHOBOTH LGBTQ+ BOOK CLUB June 28 at 5:30 p.m.

The CAMP Rehoboth Book Club is a queerfacilitated discussion group dedicated to reading about queer topics and/or books by queer authors that tackle a variety of interest and subject matters. This group is open to all regardless of sexuality and gender.

June’s selection is Yes, Daddy, by Jonathan Park-Ramage. This will be a virtual discussion.

For more information please email Salvatore@camprehoboth.com.

WALK-IN HIV TESTING Mondays from 12:00-4:00 p.m Free rapid HIV testing at CAMP Rehoboth.

Get your results in 15 minutes. Mondays are walk-in, no appointment needed. Any other time and days of the week are available for appointments by calling 302-227-5620 or email Salvatore@camprehoboth.com for more information.

Tuesdays at 8:00 a.m.

Start your Tuesdays off with Erin and CAMP Rehoboth. Erin will lead us through a mindful exercise or morning meditation for 30 minutes.

Tuesdays at 9:00 a.m.

MEN’S DISCUSSION GROUP 2nd/4th Wednesdays at 7:00 p.m.

The Men’s Discussion Group is a safe and nurturing space to start conversations important to our community. This discussion group is a safe space for gay, bisexual, transgender, and masculine of center men to talk issues, values, and matters that make up our lives, free from stigma and judgment.

LGBTQA+ YOUTH UP GROUP Thursdays in June CAMP Rehoboth LGBTQA+ Youth Discussion Group is a safe and nurturing space to start conversations important to our community. This discussion group is a safe space for LGBTQA+ youth to talk about issues, values, and matters that make up our lives, free from stigma and judgments.

The meetings are specifically open to youth ages 11-19.

Please contact Barbara Antlitz at Bantlitz@ camprehoboth.com for more information.

WOMEN IN CIRCLE 1st/3rd Saturdays at 10:00 a.m.

Women in Circle is a gathering of lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and feminine of center women. The circle is welcoming, inclusive, and a positive place to meet, connect, and share with other women. ▼

HEALTH & WELLNESS PROGRAM DIRECTOR Salvatore Seeley | YOUTH UP COORDINATOR Barbara Antlitz HIV CTR COUNSELORS Jerry Filbin, Patricia Clear, Alan Spiegelman | PEER YOUTH LEADER Julian Harbaugh JUNE 18, 2021

31 Letters

LGBTQ+ YA Column

BY JULIAN HARBAUGH

The X Category v. the Abolition of Gender Markers

A

growing number of states (and Washington, DC) have added a new letter to the binary gender markers M and F on some government-issued documents and IDs, such as drivers’ licenses. (“X Gender Markers by State,” Lambda Legal, 2020) Instead of being given the option to change merely from M to F or F to M, residents of these states could now elect to have an X be placed on their documents or IDs instead.

This is a win for transgender, nonbinary, and/or intersex people who were misrepresented by the gender marker on their documents and is a symbolic victory as well for the recognition of people outside the male/female binary. However, some people in those communities, including myself, have concerns over the structural consequences of this new marker, namely: privacy of information, the potential for increased policing and discrimination, the antiquated nature of gender markers themselves, and the faulty nature of demographic information on IDs. The first concern that is usually raised is the implicit information given by the X category: the owner of this ID is transgender, nonbinary, and/or intersex. Having this information available to anyone who views the ID is concerning when one considers the situations in which IDs are necessary. For jobs which require proof of a valid driver’s license (such as delivery jobs), this opens the door to job discrimination based on the X marker.

While discrimination based on sex is illegal, it is as yet unclear whether the X category will fall under those federal statutes. It is also very difficult to bring forward and evidence intent to discriminate in employment offers, particularly in this case. Due to the small number of people with the X marker, it would be nearly impossible to prove employer discrimination on the basis of a lack of people with the X marker.

The other main concern is with policing. Black transgender people have long been targets of over-policing and police brutality. Having a marker that confirms

Letters 32 JUNE 18, 2021

transgender status could increase that risk, and makes the marker largely closed to Black transgender people who might want it but need to be “stealth” for safety reasons.

Beyond the privacy of that information is the nature of the information itself. The purpose of having demographic information such as gender on IDs harkens back to a time before the inclusion of photos on IDs. Back then, it was relevant to know the approximate height, weight, sex, and eye color of the person who owned the ID in order to confirm that it was indeed theirs. But with the inclusion of pictures, this information feels irrelevant. Does the cashier who cards you at the liquor store really need to know what your assigned sex is (provided that the marker hasn’t been changed)? Do cops?

TSA? Poll workers?

Having a gender marker on an ID which has your picture feels unnecessary to fulfill the original purpose of the demographic information on your ID: confirming that it is yours. Gender markers are also the only demographic information besides age that cannot be self-reported. At the DMV, they ask you your height, weight, and eye color; you don’t need a doctor’s order confirming that information, and you don’t need to update it every time one of those pieces of information changes.

My driver’s license still says that I weigh about half the weight I am now, but it is not incumbent upon me to get a new license just to fix that. My face looks enough like the picture on my ID that that information becomes irrelevant in confirming my identity. In the same vein, in an age where gender non-conformity is becoming increasingly mainstream, what information does the gender marker actually provide? None which is useful for identification unless profiling is one’s intent. So, if it doesn’t serve the purpose of other demographic information, why keep it?

The main legal barrier to abolition is laws like the Real ID Act of 2005. These laws, which require gender markers on

government documents and IDs, need to be repealed, starting at the federal level.

The X category is a good first step for those who would like it, but we need to continue fighting for the abolition of gender markers if we are to create a world in which federally codified gender stratification no longer exists. ▼

Julian Harbaugh (they/them) is a recent University of Delaware graduate who enjoys lively discussions and walking their dog, Chewy. Their degree is in Political Science with a Women’s Studies minor, and in 2020 they completed their undergraduate thesis on the fight for gay marriage in Maryland.

When they’re not writing, they can be found teaching their two rats, Baxter and Bramble, new tricks, and roaming garage sales looking for antique philosophy books.

– BARBARA ANTLITZ

BARBARA ANTLITZ, CAMP REHOBOTH YOUTH UP COORDINATOR, works with Gender & Sexuality Alliances (GSAs) in middle and high schools in Kent and Sussex Counties, and with other groups supporting LGBTQ+ youth. Barbara can be reached by email at bantlitz@camprehoboth. com.

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JUNE 18, 2021

33 Letters

MEMBERSHIP MATTERS ImpACT Story

CAMP Rehoboth—We’re Here for You If our ACTions truly speak louder than words, then the ImpACT of CAMP Rehoboth is evident not only in our advocacy work, but in the day-to-day programs, classes, free counseling, and health testing we offer. This ImpACT story is just one among many that exemplify and celebrate the successes your Membership Gift makes possible.

Stay tuned for more Membership Matters stories, to see how even a seemingly minor ACTion can have a huge ImpACT on one—or many—lives in our community.

J

une 13th would have been our 34th anniversary last year. She died on June 9, 2020. There are no words to describe the loss and feelings.”

Dawn Kasow bravely shared the painful story of the sudden loss of her wife, Jean Schoellig, just one year ago. Jean suffered a hemorrhagic stroke. She was treated at Beebe Hospital, where she also had been employed, but then had to be transported to Christiana Hospital to undergo surgery. “Because of COVID, I wasn’t allowed to see or be with her from the time she left Beebe.” Dawn added: “Her sisters and I were only allowed in to

see her nine days after her brain surgery, and that was to make the decision to remove her life-support.”

Tragic and heartbreaking are the immediate words and feelings that come to mind whenever we hear of a loss like this. “I can’t quite recall who suggested I reach out to CAMP Rehoboth in the fall of last year; depression has a way of causing you not to remember,” Kasow said, “but I am very glad I called.” Dawn spoke with Sal Seeley, the Director of Health and Wellness Programs at CAMP Rehoboth, and has benefited from the grief counseling and support offered to her by CAMP Rehoboth.

During one of her visits to her session with Sal, another staff member mentioned that there was a women’s group called Women in Circle. This CAMP Rehoboth program is a moderated group that meets biweekly, currently via Zoom. Group members discuss a variety of topics as they learn from and support one another. Dawn shared that the comfort from the counseling and the support group have been a lifeline for her during this difficult time.

“Sal encouraged me to try to branch

“I can’t quite recall who suggested I reach out to CAMP Rehoboth in the fall of last year; depression has a way of causing you not to remember...”

Dawn Kasow (left) and her late wife, Jean Schoellig.

Letters 34 JUNE 18, 2021

out and get to know others,” she said.

“CAMP Rehoboth has given me the opportunity to meet new people and get involved in the community. I volunteered at the Women’s FEST Handmade Market in April and met Anita Broccolino, a CAMP Rehoboth staff member, who connected me to several new people and told me about the women’s pickleball group, and urged me to get out to other events.

“CAMP Rehoboth, the people who work there, the volunteer opportunities, and the events have given me something to look forward to. I’m not someone who is immediately comfortable around strangers, but I know being around people is very important for me at this time and I appreciate the opportunities CAMP Rehoboth has provided and made possible for me.”

This is what membership at CAMP Rehoboth makes possible and we sincerely thank our members for their generosity, and their ongoing volunteer and financial support of CAMP Rehoboth events and programs.

If you are not a member, or maybe your membership has lapsed, now is an excellent time to consider joining—or re-joining—us. While we always hope you are able to join us for our happy and celebratory occasions and events, please know that your membership dollars are also hard at work in support of our community during anyone’s difficult time, as well. If you need us, we are here.

If you would like to become a member, upgrade your membership, volunteer for events, or meet to discuss a donation, legacy, or planned giving gift, please call the CAMP Rehoboth office at 302-227-5620, or email: anita@ camprehoboth.com. ▼ Anita Broccolino is Development Director for CAMP Rehoboth.

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Show your Color with PRIDE

Join CAMP Rehoboth Today!

Read the ImpACT Story, Page 34.

JUNE 18, 2021

35 Letters

WHO’s That?... That’s CAMP!

BY ANITA BROCCOLINO, CAMP REHOBOTH DEVELOPMENT DIRECTOR

The Ways the Balls Bounce

W

omen’s sports, and the fans that gather to watch them, reign in warmer weather. Here is a sampling, but hardly a definitive list, of the various women’s public sports that our community enjoys. Get out there—ya gotta play to win!

What is free, friendly, and played outside from spring till fall with a small yellow ball? Tennis, of course. And it’s been happening every Saturday at the Cape Henlopen High School tennis courts for the last 12 years. Local tennis enthusiast, college professor, and aspiring meteorologist Lori Dewald organizes the local women’s tennis group and is proud that, after all these years, it is still going strong.

“We encourage all women to play with us regardless of their tennis skill level.

We’ll even help you learn. And while many identify as part of the LGBTQ-specific community, we also have a few heterosexual women who enjoy the level of play and camaraderie,” said Dewald.

“With only a few exceptions, most of us happen to also be CAMP Rehoboth members, too” said Linda DeFeo, who is a CAMP Rehoboth Founders Circle Member and esteemed CAMP Rehoboth volunteer.

Another player, Renee Ejdaharian, indi-

cated that anywhere from six to 14 women show up on any given Saturday, and sometimes even more. If you are new to the area, enjoy tennis, or just want to hit the ball around to see if this is your sport, you’re encouraged to check it out.

Start times vary based on the temperature, but generally the games begin around 9:00 a.m. on Saturdays. And, of course, Lori makes sure everyone knows the detailed weather forecast the night before. In fact, the entire group chimed in at once to mention Lori’s incredibly accurate forecasts. But that’s not all. The group says Lori sometimes brings food, too.

“Once in a while I will bake some cookies or brownies or muffins and bring them,” said Dewald. “But don’t only come for the sweets—that does not happen weekly,” she added. Interested in playing or checking it out? Reach out to Lori at: LoriDewald@yahoo.com or just show up on a Saturday morning at Cape Henlopen High courts.

Next up to bat on the roster is softball! That’s right, this long running and much-loved league, sponsored by Olivia Travel and run by Rina Pelligrini (another CAMP Rehoboth member and volunteer), is another subset of the women’s

(L to R): Babs Butta, Linda DeFeo, Debbie Zwicke, Renee Ejdaharian, Faye Koslow, Diane Cooke, Merry Martin, Lori Dewald.

Letters 36 JUNE 18, 2021

population getting their sports mojo in motion. “We have five full teams this year despite COVID, and many great fans who show up weekly for the Women’s Senior Softball League games at Epworth fields on Holland Glade Road,” said Pelligrini.

The games, for women ages 45 and up, are played on Tuesday evenings (weather permitting) starting at 6:15 p.m. Tailgating—and the fun—usually extend past when the games end around dusk.

A new group of pickleballers, welcoming beginners to more experienced players, has formed this year. The group is led by Ann Mei Chang and Rina Pelligrini. They pair up the pickleball foursomes based on skill level. From the growing ranks, this seems to be a winning dink.

“We are very excited and a little amazed how the number of women showing up to play keeps growing week after week,” said Chang. To find out more, simply show up on a Saturday morning between 9 and 11 a.m. at the Rehoboth Elementary School courts and seek out Ann Mei or Rina. They also play on Monday and Wednesday evenings, usually around 5:30 p.m.—weather permitting.

Thursday is a great day for golf! The CAMP Rehoboth Women’s Golf League plays nine holes at American Classic Golf in Lewes. This year’s interest has been phenomenal, and we appreciate the great work managing the large field of players

by Jo Picone, Lana Warfield, and Pam Notarangelo. The league plays at 4:30 p.m. on Thursdays. You can reach them at the course on Thursdays, or via Anita at CAMP Rehoboth. ▼ CAMP Rehoboth Development Director Anita Broccolino oversees and advances CAMP Rehoboth’s Development, Fundraising, and Communications efforts, while helping increase awareness in the community. If you would like to become a member, volunteer for events, or meet with Anita to discuss a donation, legacy, or planned giving gift, please call: 302-227-5620 or email: anita@camprehoboth.com.

OUR SUPPORTERS MAKE IT HAPPEN PURPLE LEVEL Greg Albright & Wes Combs X Sondra N. Arkin X Aaron, Heather, Gia & Joe Book* Catherine Brennan Carol Bresler & Carolyn Billinghurst X Pat Catanzariti & Carole Ramos* Edward Joseph Chrzanowski & Talmage Wesley Sykes* Skip Dye & Steven King* James W. Johnson & Matthew H. Shepard* Christine Lay X Diane & Chris Martin* Fred Munzert & J.P. Lacap Beth Pile & S.A. White X Chris Rinaldi & Brian Powers X Mary Rossettini & Kathleen Taylor Jennifer Rubenstein & Diane Scobey X Evie Simmons & Barb Thompson X Leslie Sinclair & Debbie Woods X Diane Sweeney* The Robert V. Hauff & John F. Dreeland Foundation X Jennifer Walker & Mary Ann Veitch X William Cross Foundation Steven Wright DMD PA*

INDIGO LEVEL Murray Archibald & In Memory of Steve Elkins X James Beal & In Memory of David Van Patter Wesley Blickenstaff* Jane Blue & Louisa Watrel X Joe Brannen & John Klomp X Tom Brown X John Camp Elizabeth Carl & Tori Hill X Richard Coss & Mike Hull* Jim D’Orta & Jed Ross & AJ, Cubby & Maryrose Lou Fiore & Jim Burke* Jim & Tom Flower* Gary Gajewski - In Memory of Dr. John A. Boscia David & Marti Garrett* Harry Hallock Fred Harke - In Memory of Robert Rougeau X Holly Horn & Kathleen Garrity X Claire Ippoliti X Peter Karsner X Melissa & Amanda Kaufman X Maureen Keenan & Teri Dunbar X Russell Koerwer & Stephen Schreiber X Roger Kramer Curtis J. Leciejewski, DDS, PA X David Mariner & Khusan Odilovich Natalie Moss & Evelyn Maurmeyer X Rick Mowery & Joe Conn X Tom Negran & Marc Anthony Worosilo X David Nelson & William McManus X John Newton & Mowry Spencer X Mark Niehaus & Brooks Honeycutt X Kathleen Nilles & Camille Nichols* Jeanine O’Donnell - State Farm*

Gwen Osborne & Katie Handy Signarama X The Pearsall Family* Richard Perry* Porter-Gordon Family* Deborah Qualey & Karen Gustafson X Lori & Renee Rocheleau Mark Roush & Dave Banick* Mark Schweizer & Robert Voelker Susan Tobin & Cathy Martinson* Terry Vick Frank Vitrano X Mel W. & Linda Lee M. Weller Karen West & Melissa Clement* Ronald Wetzel & Nathan Hench Brian Yanofchick

BLUE LEVEL Ronald Bass & George Robbins X Rocky Bible & Kevin Bosley In Memory of Jackie Morris Tim & Meredith Birrittella Teresa Bolduc & Kim McGeown* Karen Brause & Kim Sheaffer Coleen Collins & Berdi Price X Donna Davis & Gail Jackson X Connie Fox & Donna Adair* Richard Gamble & Paul Lindsey* Gail Gormley* Perry Gottlieb & Tim White* John Holohan & William Ensminger* Irene & Lou Katz* Nancy Kennedy & Tora Washington* Paul & Anne Michele Kuhns* Bob Mancuso & Doug Murray Marvin Miller & Dan Kyle X Rebecca Moscoso* John Roane & Doug Lingenfelter In Memory of Jeff Hosley Chris Rouchard X Michael Shaffer & Benjamin Wilson X

GREEN LEVEL Gerry Beaulieu & Bill Fuchs* Sharon Bembry & Lois Powell* Alex Benjamin & Pete Grover* David Bower* Chris Bowers* David W. Briggs & John F. Benton X Charlie Browne & Rod Cook X Barry Bugg* Cheryl Buxton Lisa Carrol & Deb Dubois X Jay Chalmers & John Potthast X Paul Christensen & Dennis Morgan* Beth Cohen & Fran Sneider X Stephen Corona Scott Davis & Chris Shaheen* Lewis & Greg Dawley-Becker* Robert Defendis & Ronald O. Dempsey* Mike DeFlavia & Tony Sowers* Max Dick* Diane Dragositz Ann Evans* Kathy & Corky Fitzpatrick X Keven Fitzsimmons & Jeff Stroud X Cynthia Flynn & Deirdre Boyle X Tom Galloway & Les Diggs

Richard Green & Asi Ohana X Joe Greenhall & Tom Klingler John Hackett & Tom Newton* David Hagelin & Andy Brangenberg* Harris Holden X Terry Hollinger & Mike May Steve Hoult & Rick Bane X Karen Hugues & Cathy McCallister X Anthony Incalcatera & James Buswold Dorsey Johnson & Kay Jernigan* Jocelyn Kaplan & Idalie Adams X Linda Kemp* Deborah Kennedy & Beth Yocum* Jerry Kennedy & Robert Quinones X Eric Korpon & Steven Haber* Leslie Ledogar & Marilyn Hewitt* James Mease & Philip Vehslage* Richard Morgante & Edward McHale* Susan Morrison* Dennis Neason & Steve Bendyna* Kim Nelson & Lori Simmons X Fran O’Brien & David Gifford* Don Peterson & Jeff Richman X Keith Petrack & Michael Fetchko* Anne Pikolas & Jean Charles X Stephen Pleskach X Gail Purcell & Sandy Kraft* Tony Purcell & In Memory of Daniel Espejel Bill Rayman & Frank King* Marty Rendon & John Cianciosi* Keith & John Riley-Spillane X Kim Rutherford & Dalit Eyal Douglas Sellers & Mark Eubanks Scott Shaughnessy & John Hassell* William Snow X Joseph Steele & Chris Leady Angie Strano & Cindy Gruman David Streit & Scott Button* Anne Tracy & Mary Gilligan Peter Trost & John Worek Cal Weible & Daniel Halvorsen X Margaret Wilkins* Kathy Wiz & Muriel Hogan X Jon Worthington & Bryan Houlette X Doug Yetter & Mark Horne Lisa Zimmerman X

YELLOW LEVEL Brenda Abell X Keith Anderson & Peter Bish X Dale Aultman & Paul Gibbs X Pamela Baker & Diane Dixson* Linda Balatti & Shirley Gilmer X Susie Ball & Susan Delaney X Mike Ballenger & Martin Thomas* Miriam Barton* Chris Beagle & Eric Engelhart* Tom Beall Barbara Beavers & Kathy Carrell Sherry Berman & Deb Hamilton X Abby Bernstein & Karen Frank X Deborah Bosick Nancy Bouse & Norma Morrison X Michael Boyle & Greg Murphy X John Brady X David Carder Kathy Casey & Jean Burgess X Kate Cauley & Pat Newcomb Bob Chambers* Jean Chlastawa & Susan Griesemer

CAMP REHOBOTH MEMBERSHIP 2021 Jim Chupella & Jim Wigand* Dottie Cirelli & Myrna Kelley X Austin Clayton Steve Clayton & Brad Lentz Gary Colangelo & Gerald Duvall X Nancy Commisso* Thomas Conway & Thoth Weeda* Kay Creech & Sharon Still* Drexel Davison - Bad Hair Day?* Anthony Delacruz & Ronald Mangano Ann DeLazaro & Annette Potemski Marianne DeLorenzo & Linda Van de Wiele* Fred DiBartolo & Steve Wood X Maureen Dolan & Karen McGavin* Albert Drulis & Scott Silber* Sandy Duncan & Maddy Ewald Susan Eig & Ellen Schiff X Gary Espinas & Daniel Sherlock Karen & Lisa Faber* Alice Fagans & Ruth Ann Mattingly* John Farley & Dennis Wilson X Dent Farr & Erick Lowe* Dee Farris* Jerry Filbin* Cecily Fisher & Loretta Higgins Diane Fisher & Kharma Amos Metropolitan Community Church of Rehoboth* Monica Fleischmann & Lona Crist X John Flournoy & Jim Chrobot John Furbush & Tom Feng Susan Goudy* Bill Graff & Jeff Schuck* Ken Green & Joe Kearney* Michael Green & Robert Schwerdtfeger* Patricia Guild Mary Gunning Jo Hamilton & Donna Voigt* Harbor Healthcare* Pete & Joanne Harrigan* David Herring & Karl Hornberger Carol Holland - Holland Jewelers X Caroline Huff & Brenda Robertson* Pete Jakubowski* Philip Johnson* Marilyn Kates & Laura Glenn* Rose Korten & Brenda Pinkney Greg Kubiak* Susan Kutliroff & Barbara Snyder Carol Lazzara & Sheila Maden* Monica Lewis & Ann Zimmerman* Frank Liptak & Joe Schnetzka* Jim Lonsdale & Bryan Hoffman Patricia Magee & Anita Pettitt X Ellie Maher Harold Marmon & Robert Hill* John Marson Jill Masterman & Tammy Jackson* Tony Mazzarella Michael McCarthy & Lars Kontz Mickie McManamon* Howard Menaker & Patrick Gossett X Floyd Merchant Ray Michener & Tom Carlson* Linda Miniscalco & Jeanne Drake* Sherril Moon & Louise Montgomery* Jack Morrison & Bob Dobbs* Rita Nelson & Ralph Peters Sandy Neverett & Pam Cranston X Robert Nowak & David Bergman X

Judy Olsen & Joanne Kempton X Maggie Ottato X Dotti Outland & Diane Mead X Peninsula Gallery - Tony & Carol Boyd-Heron* John Piccirillo & Jonathan Rose Joanne Picone & Kathy Bostedo* Denny Pintello & Coke Farmer* Tom Poor & Tom Bachmann - Bin 66 Fine Wine* Jim Pressler X Sam Profeta X Lisa Rabigi & Bea Vuocolo* Joie Rake & Nan Flesher X Gene Roe X Thomas Rose & Thomas Sechowicz X Lucien Rossignol & Tom Harris* Mark Saunders & Bob Thoman* Gary Schell & Jim DiRago Betsy Schmidt X Sheryl Schulte & Jeanne LaVigne* Angela Scott Troy Senter & Stacey Chan* Mary Ann Slinkman & Sharyn Santel Polly Smale - In Memory of Charlotte Reid* David Smith & Kenn Williams Susan Soderberg & Terri King X John Michael Sophos & Miss Dot Sophos* Diane Sozio & Patricia Hutchinson* Mary Spencer & Kathy Lingo* Russell & Patricia Stiles* Robert Stoltzfus & Gerald Warhola* Lenny Stumpf & John B. Pitchford* Brett Svensson & Bill Quinn Dust Doctors LLC* Lana Warfield & Pamela Notarangelo X Michael Weinert X Douglas Werner & JD Pryor Joseph & Diane Wood Tony Wright & Mary Jo Bennett X Steven Wunder & Rod Hastie Jean Sutliff Young* Joanne Yurik* Larry Zeigler X John Zingo & Rick Johnson* Karl Zoric & Mark Pipkin X

ORANGE LEVEL Gwen Atwell & Marla Hoon Shannon & Sarah Avery* Ruth Ball & Mary Ellen Jankowski* Romulus Barba & Dean Yanchulis* Paul Barbera & Joseph Nolan Nancy Bearss & Jenni Lindsay Peter Bezrucik* Kathleen Biggs & Maria Campos Kathy Board & Jackie Maddalena Boland Family - In Memory of Michael J. Kelly* Linda Bova & Bridget Bauer The Sea Bova Associates* William Briganti & Gary Moore* Anita Broccolino - In Memory of Cathy Fisher Wendy Bromfeld* Ronald Butt & Steve Cannon* William Byron & Ali Lazur Debbie Cali & Maddie Cunningham Continued on page 38

JUNE 18, 2021

37 Letters

Continued from page 37

Helen Chang & Pat Avery Michael Clement & Mac Gardner* Community Bank Delaware* Mark Conheady* Lois Cortese & Jill Stokes X Kenneth Currier & Mike Tyler X John D’Amico* Joseph Davey & H. Ralph Fletcher Linda DeFeo X J. Lynne Dement & Lisa J. Snyder* Jim DiLalla & In Memory of Frederick Episcopo* Tony DiMichele & Jeff Smith* Joe DiSalvo* Donna Dolce* Kevin Doss & Arie Venema Arlyce Dubbin & Kathleen Heintz* Jeanne Embich* Maureen Ewadinger* Ellen Feinberg & Lesley Rogan X Barbara Fitzpatrick & Denise Centinaro Sara Ford & Anne Donick* Deb Fox & Deb Bonneau Charles Gable Christopher Galanty & James Apistolas Joan Glass X Ron Glick & Tien Pham* William Gluth & Channing Daniel Ed Gmoch* Mike Gordy & Ed Brubaker Joe Gottschall & Scott Woody Charles Graham* Deborah Grant & Carol Loewen* Todd Hacker Wesley Hacker & David Block* Jen Hackler Siobhan Halmos & Beth McLean* Sharon Hansen X Pat Harte & Nancy Sigman Tracey & Erica Hellman Nancy Hewish & Vicki Martina* Bill Hillegeist X Vance Hudgins & Denny Marcotte* John Hulse X Mary Huntt & Angela Creager Janet Idema & Patricia Higgins* Bob Kabel* Sharon Kanter & Cyndy Bennett* Mark Kehoe X Maryl Kerley & Pat Sagat X Bonnie Kirkland & Wanda Bair X Ruth Kloetzli & Lisa Scholl* Jay Kottoff & Mark Matey* Rob & Jean Krapf X Barbara Lang & Diane Grillo* Glenn Lash & Mark Paugh Jim Lesko Chip Logan Dale & Sue Lomas* John Mackerey & Donald Filicetti Duncan MacLellan & Glenn Reighart* Robb Mapou & Mike Zufall Marsha Mark & Judy Raynor* Michael & Stephan Maybroda Kathy & Steve McGuiness* Kate McQueen* Margaret Moore & Sheree Mixell X Thomas Moore & Richard Bost* Robert Neighbour & Andrew Dan Pat Nickols* Donna Ohle & Susan Gaggiotti X Lisa Orem & Debby Armstrong* Sandra Oropel & Linda Frese* Carolyn Ortwein & Ann Barry* Rutland Paal & Robert Mittleman* Sandra Pace & Barbara Passikoff X

Letters 38 JUNE 18, 2021

Steve Parker* Ellen Passman X Marilyn Pate & Dorothy Smith* Rina Pellegrini Colleen Perry & Jane Kuhfuss* Marianne Perry & Jeanette Laszczynski Deena Pers X Grace Pesikey & Janet Urdahl* Russ Phipps & Stephen Jacobs* Peter Pizzolongo & Carlos Prugue* Pat Powell Stephen Proctor Pierce Quinlan & Ginny Daly Jay Raksin Thomas Ramsey & Chris Murray Alex Reed & Jed Millard Susan Reinagel & Dawn Henderson* Pat Renninger & Tammy Plumley X Bill Rogers & Jeff Wilkinson Judy Rosenstein & Elva Weininger X Deborah & Charles Ross X Michael Safina & Tim Bean Katherine Sams* Richard Sargent* Laurie Schneider & Margie Ripalda* Teri Seaton & Rena Frampton-Seaton Michael Seifert & Harvey Holthaus* Craig Sencindiver & Gary Alexander* Frank Shockley & Arthur Henry Anita Smulyan Tina Snapp Christine Stanley & Joyce Rocko* Matthew Stensrud & Michael Cohen Greig Stewart & Jake Hudson* Caroline Stites & Elizabeth Coit X Brian Straka* Sandra Sullivan & Lorie Seaman* Terrence Sullivan David Szumski & James Carfagno Trudie Thompson Thrasher’s French Fries* Jeffrey Trunzo & Herman Goodyear* James Vernicek & Jeff Dailey* Tama Viola Don Wainwright & Tom Jamison* Elizabeth Way & Dorothy Dougherty* Donald Wessel William Wheatley* Ralph Wiest & Anthony Peraine* Daryle Williams & Steven Fretwell Melanie Wolfe & Monica Niccolai Sherri Wright & Dick Byrne* Niki Zaldivar & Cecil McNeil X Kathryn Zimmerman Helaine Zinaman & Roselyn Abitbol X

RED LEVEL Guy Abernathey X Dale Adams Adrienne & Kim* Jim Affonco X Mark Aguirre & Wayne Gleason X Bill Alldredge X Stephani Allison & Judith Gorra X Ria Allman Marge Amodei* Alan Anderson X Daniel Anderson & Greg Melanson Lois Andreasen & Jean McCullough* Andrea Andrus & Maggie Shaw X Peter Antolini X Patricia Antonisse X Wanda Armwood & Illona Williams Judith & Wanda Ashbrook Jan Atwell Terry & Gayle August

Jack Ay & James Krebsbach* Josh Bach & Edward Ginley Kathleen Bailey X John Baker & Richard Latham X John D. Baker June Baker* Sarah Barnett Curtiss Barrows X Brian Bartels Eric Barton & Greg Nagel John Batchelor X Karen Beck George Beckerman* Beebe Medical Foundation* Pat Beebe Mike Behringer & Nelson Correa* Alex Belano Sheryl Bender & Doreen DiLorenzo* George Benes & Michael Mallee X Suzanne Bennethum & Deborah Smith Jeri Berc X John Berdini X Joel Berelson & Charles Maples* Lisa Beske Christine Bielenda & Karen Feuchtenberger* Thomas Biesiadny X Deb Bievenour & Susan Shollenberger* Lorraine Biros* Cathin Bishop & Laura Simon X Jason Blachek Ann Black & Kaye Wachsmuth X Carol Blair* Eric Blondin - State Farm Insurance Rehoboth Beach X Jacquelyn Blue X Rev. Dr. Tom Bohache & Tom Laughingwolf Simmons X Annabelle Boire* Carl Bomberger & Mike Rhoads Robin Bond & Leanna Johannes* Bob Bonitati X Joy Boone & Marina Simmers X Randall Borgerson X Pete Borsari X Laura Borsdorf X Darice Bowles & Gerry Sue Davis* David & Donna Bowman X Deni Boyer & Loretta Imbrogono Brian Boyle & Larry Gee X Beth Bozman Jim Brady & Mike Hays X Victor Branham & Mark Clark Kelly Brennan & Susan McVey* Susan Brinsfield & Barbara Devenport Debora Brooke * Kevin Brown X Lyn Brown & Winsome Boyd Mathew Brown Diane Bruce & Annie Sorvillo* Daniel Bruner & Tim Beymer Marilyn Bryant Donald Bucher & Kevin Paul Al Bulliner X Belinda Buras & Linda Simeone Geoffrey Burkhart & Bruce Williams* Lyn Burleson & Sharon Werner* Carol L. Burnett X Rob Burns & Cris Hamer* Tony Burns X Timothy B. Bush X Randy Butt & Emerson Bramble* James Byrnes X Chris Cahill X Robertine Cale Ingrid Callmann & Karen Askins* Leslie Calman & Jane Gruenebaum*

Michele Campisi & Julie A. Slick X Joe Canter Matt Carey X Jim Carlo X Justine Carpenter X Shirley Carpenter & Mary Coldren X John Carr & Billy Cox* Marianna Carson & Laura Bobo Alice Casey Jo Cason & Peggy Neidlinger Teresa Cason & Lynda Schepler X Sara Cavendish & Wendy Bunce X Denis Chandler & Sebastion DiMauro Linda Chaney & Irene Lawlor* Dr. Harvey J. Chasser X Mike Chateauneuf X Dan Childers & Ted Hernandez* Tom Childers & John Hall X Sandra Chinchilla & Michelle Holmes X Curt Christensen & Ellen Heald* Billy J. Christian X Dennis Chupella & Rob White X Norma K. Clark X Rob Cline Barbara Clipper Amy Clouse & Betty Long X Carolyn Cole & Sandy McDevitt X Stuart Comstock-Gay X Inez Conover X Bill Cooley & Ken Watkins DVM X Josh Cooper & Steve Rathburn Jeffery A. Coover X Michael Cornell X Lois Corson & Mary Murdoch X Mary Costa & Kris Nygaard Becky & Tom Craft X Wendy Cramer & Carolyn Baranowski* Theresa-Ann Crivelli & Angela Murray Robert Crocetti X Bill Cross & David McCall X Mark Cunningham & Ken Tattersall X Rich Custer Howard Cyr & Lynn Ashley* Ellen Dahl Susan Daily William T. Darley X Debra Davies & Joanne Saltzberg Jeremiah Davis Marsha Davis & Bev Lesher X Kathy Davison & Ruth Dickerson X Scott & Donna de Kuyper Hotel Blue* Frederick Dean & Steven Swierzy X Linda Dean & Donna Whiteside* Scott Dechen & James Maino Michael Decker X Michael DeGraffenreid Maureen Delaney & Madonna Aldrich Bernie Delia X Frank Dell’Aquila X Claire Dente & Leslie Campo* Karen DeSantis & Carol Brice* Nancy DeToma & Meg Smith* David DeVargas & Steven Champion X Barbara Devenport & Susan Brinsfield Carolyn DeVito Dawn Devries & Helen Krum Henry & Marcia DeWitt X Romy Diaz & Dennis Bann Geri Dibiase Photography* Julie Dickson X Richard Dietz

Phyllis Dillinger Mary Dipietro & Wendy Schadt* Deb Dobransky & Ketty Bennett* Arthur Dochterman X David & Lizann Dockety X Peg Dolan & Mary McDevitt X Millie Donnell Debbie & Karen Dorris* Kathryn Downs Frances Doyle X Paul Dradransky X Michael Driscoll & Ben McOmber X Susan Dube & Diana Patterson* Deanna Duby & Carol Bruce Barry Dunkin Brenda Dunn & Karen Anderson Gene Dvornick X Sue Early X Frank Echols & Robert Robinson Eden Restaurant X Gail Elliott & Bea Hickey* Pamela Elliott W. Kay Ellis Susan Farr & Joanne Pozzo Alexis Faust Rene Fechter & Cynthia Smith Larry & Ro Fedorka Karen Ferguson Virginia Fessler & Chris Patton Jayne & Ro Fetterman* Irene & Edward Fick* Allen Fred Fielding X Joe Filipek & Larry Richardson X Mark Finkelstein & Michael Zeik X Paul Finn & Joseph Porporino Rick Fischer X Barbara Fischetti & Janet Thoden Gary Fisher & Josh Bushey* James Fitzsimmons & Brian Burdelle Chuck Flanagan & George Whitehouse X David Flohr & Steven Kuschuck* Paul Florentino & Chris Pedersen X Sandra Fluck & Beverly Morgan* Mary Ford & Judy Hedrick X Anthony Forrest & Glyn Edwards Roland Forster & David McDonald Beebe Frazer X Phil Fretz X Billiemichelle & Evelyn Friel* Neil Frock & Bob Harrison* Marilyn Fuller & Teresa Marigliano June Rose Futcher Lorraine Gaasche & Jill Mayer* Frank Gainer & Ramon Santos* Lynn Gaites & Faye Koslow X Nina Galerstein* Marcia Gallo & Ann Cammett Karen Gantz & Jeanie Geist Kathryn Gantz & Kathryn Gehret Don Gardiner X Cheri Garnet & Cynthia Arno Patricia Garrison Mindy Gasthalter* Wilson Gates X Charles George & Dennis Rivard X Tracey Gersh & Amy Johnson Gary Gillard X Jordan Gipple & Paul Weppner* Karen Glooch X Ronald Gluck Jane Godfrey* Randall Godwin X Jackie Goff & Mary Vogt X Dave Gold & In Memory of James Yiaski X Robert Gold X Mel Goldberg Continued on page 40

JOIN US SATURDAY, JUNE 26TH AT 6PM FOR OUR INAUGURAL SUMMER SOLSTICE ON THE TERRACE! HORS D'OEUVRES | OPEN BAR | LIVE ENTERTAINMENT | 50/50 RAFFLE | SILENT AUCTION LAST DAY FOR TICKETS: JUNE 24 | SUMMERSOLSTICEONTHETERRACE.EVENTBRITE.COM | ALL PROCEEDS BENEFIT CAMP REHOBOTH

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JUNE 18, 2021

39 Letters

Continued from page 38

Suzanne Goldstein & Dana Greenwald X Milton Gordon & Bill Hromnak X Teresa Gordy & Barb Ford X Dan Goren & Peter Robinson X Anita Gossett & Ronnie Smith* Amy Grace & Karen Blood* Lisa & Raymond Graff* Paul R. Grant & Marc Watrel* Cheryl Graves Linda Gregory Harvey Grider Kenneth Grier* Richard Grifasi X John Grillone & Paul Schlear Jr. X Joseph Gritz X Jeffrey Groenheide Wendy Grooms & Barbara Fishel X Carol Gross X James Gross X Richard & Frances Grote* Paula Grubbs X Helene Guilfoy X Bill Gunning & Joe Greoski X Bob Gurwin & John Rourke Marie & Ken Haag* Jay Haddock & Hector Torres* Gerard M. Haley & George D. Zahner X Cynthia Hall X Barbara Hals & Sharon Dyke Mark Hare & Mike Newman X Kelley Harp X David Harrer & Floyd Kanagy* Mary Hartman & Laurie Nelson Jeff Haslow X Janece Hausch* John & Mary Havrilla* Nancy Hawpe Daniel F.C. Hayes* Gail Hecky* Barb & Len Hedges-Goetti Leslie Hegamaster & Jerry Stansberry* Linda Heisner X Steve & Maria Hendricks David Herchik & Richard Looman X Fred Hertrich X Howard Hicks & Stephen Carey X Barbara Hines & Nancy Froome X Howard C. Hines, MD X Karen Hinman Janel Hino & Patricia Ann Scully X Connie Holdridge* Robert Holloran & Ed Davis* Brad Holsinger & Ed Moore Mod Cottage* Chris Holt & Emory Bevill X Mollyne Honor & Shelley Garfield Larry Hooker X Mary Anne Hoopes & Dianna Johnston* James T. Hopkins X Elaine Horan & Debbie Sciallo X Frank Hornstein & Mark Henckel X James Hospital & Jack Fraker* Robert Hotes X Corey Houlihan & Karen Abato Carol Huckabee Peggy Ann Hughes Ron Hughes & Ben Cross Ellan Hylton Batya Hyman & Belinda Cross* Thomas Ingold X Chris Israel & John Stassi X Debbie Isser & Fran Leibowitz Geoffrey Jackson & Will Delany X Fay Jacobs & Bonnie Quesenberry X

Letters 40 JUNE 18, 2021

Sharon Janis X Steve Janosik & Rich Snell X Allen Jarmon & Ward Ellinger X Robert Jasinski* Mary Jenkins & Laura Reitman Susan Jimenez & Cathy Benson X Chip Johnson - In Memory of Joseph Lachac Donna A. Johnson* Ken Johnson X Randi Johnson Tara Johnson Jim Johnston Richard Jolly & Charles Ingersoll X D. J. Jones Dee Dee Jones & Julie Blake Gay Jones & Barb Bartels Glenn Jones X Rob Jones Sue Jones & Dottie Stackhouse Tom Jones X Nola Joyce & Brenda Eich* Frank Jump & Vincenzo Aiosa Wayne Juneau X Mick Kaczorowski X Bob Kaplan & Jeff Davis X Daphne Kaplan & Steve Scheffer Sharon Kaplan & Pamela Everett* Kevin P. Kaporch X Amylynn Karnbach - One Day At A Time Gifts, LLC Anne Kazak & Chris Coburn X Peter Keeble & Tom Best Margaret Keefe* Alan Keffer* Donald Kelly* John Kelly & Randy Sutphin X Michael J. Kelly X John Kennedy Rosemary Kerwin Hunter Kesmodel X Ned Kesmodel & Matt Gaffney X Tom Ketterman Marge Keyes & Julie Arenstein X C. David Kimmel* Spencer Kingswell X Daniel Kinsella* Frank Klemens & Barry Brown Jane Knaus & Cindy Myers Beth Kopicki in Honor of Barbara Nissley Stephen Kopp John Kort & Hung Lai* Robert Kovalcik & Bob Howard X Myra Kramer & John Hammett* Marcia Kratz* Karen Kreiser & Beth Nevill* Kevin W. LaBarge X Peter Lanzaro & Frank Bodsford X Dr. Mathilda Laschenski & Dr. Kathleen Heacock X Ruth Lauver & Judy Wetzel* Kate Lavelle X Charlie Lee X Jon Leeking & Dieulifete Jean* Edmund LeFevre & Keith Wiggs X Sherry Leichman & Keith Snyder Jen Leonard & Claire McCracken Marsha Levine & Susan Hamadock X Barbara Lilien* Cindy Lins & Diane Milam Eleanor Lloyd & Celeste Beaupre Jonathan & Karlyn Lokken* Robert E. Long X Pat Loughlin* Cynthia Lowe & Rae von Doehren Debbie Lupton Diane Lusk X P. Michael Lutz*

Becky Lyons & Ebie Hamrick X Wendy Maclay & Sheree Davis* Joe Maggio X Loretta Mahan* Bernadette Maher & Cheryl Tarlecky Jack Maher X Nancy Maihoff X Eddie Major X Bruce Majors X Harvey Manchester X Brian Mann Domenic Mannello X Stephanie Manos & Reber Whitner X Anyda Marchant X Charles Marino & Alan Berman* Diane Markey & Randi Snader* Ann Martin Colleen Martin Michele Martin & Rosalee Elson Norma Martin X Linda Martinak & Susan Baker Nan Martino & Patty Rickman* James Mastoris & Edward Chamberlain X Joe Matassino & Tim Murray Frank Matero Nancy Mathis Jason Darion & Jason A. Mathis-White John Matthews & Nick Polcini* Sarah Matthews Eric Matuszak X Lewis Maurer Donna McCabe & Mac Ignacio X Kathleen McCormick & Elizabeth Fish X Sean McDonald Mary McElhone & Nancy Kaiser X Thomas McGlone X Ellen McKeon & Kay Cummings Joe McMahon X Joseph McNally & Terry Jones X Charlotte McNaughton Chuck McSweeney & Michael Clay X Jim & Bruce McVey-Back* Mary Medlock & Susan Russell Buck Melton X John Messick X Joseph & Thomas Michael-Ryan Alicia Mickenberg & Kathleen Fitzgerald* Jamie Middelton* Dr. Phyllis J. Mihalas X Melissa Milar* Alicia Miller & Shawn Noel* Bruce R. Miller & Dean D. LaVigne X Frank Miller X Marilyn K. Miller & Candice Zientek* Todd A. Miller & Michele Frame X Trixie Miller Stan Mills & Marcia Maldeis X Martha Monell Andrea Monetti & Karen Petermann* Sue Monismith X Jamie Moore Teri Moore & Barb Kulbaba* Mary Morgan & Beth Fitton X Meg Morgan & Susan Lynham X Bob Morris & James Weygandt Carol Morris & Ann Abel Pearl Morris* Richard Morris Barry Moshinski & Robert Ponzini Andrew K. Moss & Richard Blevins X Donna Mulder & Denise Delesio* Brent Mundt X Marie Murray & Deb Ward X Robbin Murray & De Raynes* Cynthia Myers Kathleen Nagle & Susan Blazey

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Patricia Remeis & Maureen Kane Don Reppy Thomas Resh & Jeffrey Meyers X Judith Retchin & Elyse Wander X Deborah Reuter & Deborah Bea* Sarah Reznek & Babette Pennay Sandie Riddell & Eileen Siner* Marion Ridley & Mark Lundy X John Riley Joel Robbins & Michael Linder X Sandra Robbins X William Robbins & Gary Ralph Sandy Roberts X Rob Robertson & Carlos Taylor X Teri & Amy Robinson-Guy Craig Rocklin X Tim Rodden & Randy Clayton X John & Susan Roehmer* Jeanne Rogers* Roy Rollins X Lauren Romig X Debbie Ronemus & Peggy Sander* Ed Rose & Sandra Robbins X Michael Rose & David Le Sage Peter Rosenstein X Larry L. Ross X Ellen & Terry Roth Perreault X Barb Rowe X Ski Rowland & Gary Mosher X Joan Rubenstein X Mary K. Ryan Steve Sage & Thom Swiger X Chris Sailer & Min Mancini Joe & Nancy Sakaduski* Margaret Salamon* Cindy Sanders & Donna Smith* Sanford & Doris Slavin Foundation X Richard Scalenghe & Thomas Panetta* Kim Schilpp* Nancy Schindler & Eric Youngdale Michael Schlechter & Kevin Sharp X Lisa Schlosser & Sherri Brown Rosemarie Schmidt & Carolyn Horn X Kirk Schneck Holly Schneider & Linda Haake Jaime Schneider & Glenn Randall X Peter Schott & Jeffrey Davis* Carol Schwartz X Craig Schwartz & William Pullen X Mona Schwartz & Joanne Tramposch* Carol Scileppi & Valerie McNickol* Diane Scobey X John Scotti & Greg Landers David Scuccimarra & Dorothy Fedorka* Clifton C. Seale & Charles A. Gilmore* Nancy Bradley Seibert* Gary Seiden & Ah Bashir X Shirley Semple* Marj Shannon* Dale Sheldon & Pat Coluzzi X Tara Sheldon Kelly Sheridan & Debra Quinton David Sherman X George Shevlin & Jack Suwanlert* Davis Short & Beverly Castner Francine Siedlecki Frank Silverio X Marc Silverman & John Campbell* Brian Sims Joanne Sinsheimer & Margaret Beatty* Sandra Skidmore X Ken Skrzesz X Jeffrey Slavin X Continued on page 43

JUNE 18, 2021

41 Letters

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Anne Smith & Lisa Taylor Carol Smith* Harlan Joe Smith & Dustin Abshire* Leonard Smith X Marty Smith & F. Price Connors Peg Smith* Robert Smith Rosanne Smith & Brenda Butterfield* Shannon Smythe & Kevin Subers Claire & Mikki Snyder-Hall Sandra Sommerfield & Cindy Scott X Sandy Souder - Unity of Rehoboth Beach* Lynda Sowbel Dee Speck & Linda Kauffman X Jim Spellman X Lorraine Stanish & Beverly Miller* Christy Steer X Frank Sterner X Lisa Stewart X Libby Stiff & Bea Wagner X Allison Stine & Pete Jamieson Terry Stinson* Tracy Stith & Laura McCarthy Dr. Frederick C. Stoner * Michael Stover* Christine Strauss X Lois Strauss X Kaye Sullivan Trish Sullivan & Sandy Hudson Jill Sungenis & Nicole Bano Frank Surprenant, DDS & Chris Wisner X John Swift & Ron Bowman X Melanie Szvitich Gail Tannenbaum & Wendy Walker* Ronald Tate & Jacob Schiavo X Suzie & Robert Taylor - In Memory of Richard Bonnet Micaela Tedford X David Thomas & David Tiburzio X The Hon. Henry E. Thomas IV & John-Kevin Litschgi X Thomas Tibbetts X Otto F. Tidwell X George Todd & Rusty Baker Cassandra Toroian X Manny Tortosa X Cheryll & Bill Trefzger* Steve Triglia X Roz Troupin & Mary Harris X Patricia Truitt Abby Tschoepe & Pat Dunn* Matt Turlinski & Jerry Sipes X Ed Turner & Steve Baker X Judy Twell & Cheri Himmelheber Bruce Uliss X Thomas Urban & Marc Samuels* Donna Valla Debra Van Dyke* Jennifer Varone Joseph Vescio V. James Villareale & Dale Ebert* Gail Vitale & Carmen Garrett Beverly Vogt & Waneeta Mack X Patrick Wadsworth & Mike Converse X Scott Wagner & John Sohonage* Eric Wahl Marianne Walch X David Wall & Robert Houck* Kenneth E. Walz & Robert G. Ward, Jr. X Garold Wampler X Michael E. Ward X Robert Warmkessel X Jack Warren* Sharyn Warwick X

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JUNE 18, 2021

43 Letters

FEATURE

BY ROBERT DOMINIC

The People on the Gay Beach

H

appy Pride, Letters readers! Poodle Beach. Fire Island Pines. Provincetown.

Sebastian Beach. South Beach. These are our favorite gay beaches up and down the East Coast. My happy place is anywhere there is sand and water. I was lucky enough to spend many summers (and definitely this summer) going to Poodle Beach almost daily.

At any gay beach you see the same “type” of people. And Poodle is no exception.

First and foremost, there are the two types of chair people—those facing the water and those with their back to the water tracking the sun like a sundial. And you are either one or the other. No in between! Robby from Brooklyn is a chair-facing-the-water person. It’s like our very own Jets vs. the Sharks. It’s a gay beach—Broadway reference mandatory!

Next, there are the committed, serious beach goers who pack everything and anything.

They usually have a huge tent, boogie boards, coolers, kites, lunch, and dinner. They do not mess around. They come to slay. Usually, they are the ladies. If you want something done and done right, get a lesbian to do it!

Then, there are the prancers—the ones that want to be ogled and fantasized about. They might be leisurely walking up and down the beach pretending to gaze out on the horizon. They might be doing acrobatics, handstands, cartwheels. You name it, these guys are wanting to be seen. Of course, they are hot AF so yes, we stop and stare. Give the people what they want is their motto.

Also on the athletic side are the Kadima players.

We call it Paddle in NYC. Or maybe I just call it that.

More often than not, the Kadima players are hardcore and extremely competitive. Their bodies are ripped and they hit that ball back and forth with an amazing amount of strength, matched with grunts.

Watching them you would think you are watching Venus take on Serena at the US Open.

My favorite people are the boyfriend twins. They wear matching swimsuits. Now before you stop reading and delete me from your contacts let me explain. The suits aren’t identical matches. They

A gay beach is like Disney, one of the happiest places on Earth. For many, it’s a safe place. Couples walk hand in hand, kiss without fear of ridicule or harm.

Letters 44 JUNE 18, 2021

might be from the same designer, they might be the same suit but in a different color. But they definitely “match” in other aspects as well. These couples have hats that match—again, different hats from the same company. The boyfriend twins do have identical beach chairs. You know what—I am here for it.

Super cute. Maybe this explains why I am still single.

My least favorite people are what I call music philanthropists—people who designate themselves to provide music for the entire beach. They show up with their Bluetooth speakers and play house music at the loudest volume possible. Gurl, let me tell you this in case no one else has: no one else at the beach wants to hear your music. People come to the beach to relax, to listen to waves crashing, to talk to their friends. Do everyone a favor, DJ Ocean, turn down the volume on the latest Dua Lipa remix.

As the afternoon hits 5 p.m., the dynamics of the beach shift. The people who have been there all day start to head out and the second wave hits.

These are the people who have been working from home, looking for a few hours of sun before it sets. I straddle both groups. That sounded way dirtier than I intended it to. I arrive around 2 p.m. and stay until 6 p.m. or later. Late-day beach time is my favorite beach time.

Lastly, true to its name, Poodle beach, after 5 p.m., turns into a makeshift dog park. Dogs and their owners are playing, running, frolicking—happy to be outside and in the sun—everyone off leash!

A gay beach is like Disney, one of the happiest places on Earth. For many, it’s a safe place. Couples walk hand in hand; kiss without fear of ridicule or harm. Many have marched and protested and fought for our right to live life openly and proudly on any gay beach we want. So take advantage of this, take yourself to the beach, and be any type of beach goer you want. Wherever you celebrate Pride, whether dancing on a float in the big parade or eschewing the crowds and escaping to the beach for the day, be GAY AF and be PROUD AF! See you on Poodle Beach! ▼ Robert Dominic splits his time between Brooklyn and Rehoboth Beach. He writes for publications including Instinct Magazine and his own blog “The Gays of our Lives.” When he is not writing he is probably at Poodle Beach.

JUNE 18, 2021

45 Letters

Pride History

BY MICHAEL GILLES

Stonewall: Heroes in the Night

E

arly in the morning of June 28, 1969, an event took place that would change the landscape of the gay liberation movement. On that fateful morning, a series of violent protests by members of the LGBTQ community erupted during a police raid at a gay bar in Greenwich Village.

For several hours, police clashed with patrons at the bar and in the surrounding neighborhoods. The bar was the Stonewall Inn. The clash would come to be known as the Stonewall riots.

Patrons of the Stonewall, other Village lesbian and gay bars, and neighborhood street people and residents gathered outside of the bar a bit past one in the morning, as the raid began. They ignored police orders to disperse. The crowd was stirred up as people were being roughly handled by the police.

At one point, an officer hit a lesbian over the head, and within minutes, a full-blown riot involving hundreds of people began.

This year is the 52nd anniversary of that night and the days following it. There were many heroes on the 28th. Here are a few that made a difference.

Homeless street kids were the first to fight with the police. Many of these kids were gay or transgender street youth. The most outcast people in the gay community were responsible for the first volley of projectiles.

They also uprooted a parking meter that was used as a battering ram on the doors of the Stonewall Inn, where several police officers were trapped.

A bit later, a woman in handcuffs was escorted from the bar to a waiting police wagon. Some suggest that it was Stormé DeLarverie, a well-known lesbian entertainer.

She was fighting with the police, swearing, and shouting. Described as “a typical New York butch,” she had been hit on the head by an officer with a baton. The bloodied woman sparked the crowd to fight when she looked at bystanders and shouted, “Why don’t you guys do something?” After an officer picked her up and heaved her into the back of the wagon, the crowd became an angry mob.

Two of the most important foremothers of the modern LGBTQ rights movement rose to the challenge during the riots and the time after.

Letters 46 JUNE 18, 2021

Read more accounts of the rebellion in the following books: Stonewall: The Riots That Sparked the Gay Revolution

by David Carter The Stonewall Riots

by Charles River Editors The Stonewall Riots, a Documentary History

by Mark Stein The Right Side of History

by Adrian Brooks The Village: A History of Greenwich Village

by John Strausbaugh Up from Invisibility

by Larry Gross The Gay 100

by Paul Russell The Gay Revolution: The Story of the Struggle

by Lillian Faderman And Then I Danced: Traveling the Road to LGBT Equality

by Mark Segal Law and the Gay Rights History

by Walter Frank

Sylvia Rivera was a 17-year-old Puerto Rican drag queen at the Stonewall Inn. She was in the crowd gathering outside of the bar as things began to escalate. Rivera was one of the first bystanders to throw a bottle “You’ve been treating us like shit all these years? Uh-uh. Now it’s our turn.”

Marsha P. Johnson, an African-American street queen, was celebrating her 25th birthday at the bar. She climbed a lamppost and dropped a heavy bag onto the hood of a police car, shattering the windshield.

Sylvia Rivera and Marsha P. (Pay It No Mind) Johnson remained in the Village to turn the riots into something much more, an organized front against homophobia and transphobia. That movement today is known as Gay Liberation or Pride.

For years, their contributions at Stonewall had been minimized and lost to history, but that has changed. New York City is installing a new statue on Christopher Street to celebrate Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera. It will be the first permanent public artwork dedicated to transgender women.

By the time of Stonewall, there were 50 to 60 gay groups in the country. A year later there were at least 1,500.

These words from the Department of the Interior’s John Berry at the dedication of the land around Stonewall as a National Historic Landmark capture the importance of the Stonewall riots: “Let it forever be remembered that here—on this spot—men and women stood proud, they stood fast, so that we may be who we are, we may work where we will, live where we choose, and love whom our hearts desire.”

Words made possible by these and countless other heroes in the night. ▼ Michael Gilles is a playwright, actor, and director from Milton, and a regular contributor to Letters from CAMP Rehoboth.

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JUNE 18, 2021

47 Letters

Letters 48 JUNE 18, 2021

Giving back is my way of saying “Thank you.”

George Bunting Jr, Agent 19716 Sea Air Ave #1 Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 Bus: 302-227-3891 george@gbunting.com

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JUNE 18, 2021

49 Letters

Volunteer Spotlight

BY KAREN LAITMAN

Maybe You Can Go Home Again

P

age’s earliest years were spent in Newark, Delaware. Then, in the sixth grade she moved to Smyrna, Tennessee, where she lived until she moved to Rehoboth Beach on New Year’s Day in 2019.

For the last 50 years, however, she vacationed at her grandparent’s home in Lewes.

Page has noticed a lot of changes over the years. She says there are a lot more cars, houses, and people in the Rehoboth area. She also notes that “the fish are nowhere near as BIG they used to be 50 years ago.” But she says there have been many positive changes as well, including the fact that the Rehoboth area has become much more friendly towards the LGBTQ community.

Page began volunteering in Nashville.

She first volunteered with a youth group called One-in-Teen for LGBTQ youth.

One year later, that organization was officially named JUST US, an offshoot of a larger youth group called The Oasis Center. That organization still exists.

Page also volunteered in Nashville by helping during the winter months at a homeless shelter for youth, where she says 40 percent identified as being LGBTQ. She served as a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) volunteer as well. CASA workers are community volunteers who stand up and speak out to help abused and neglected children.

Page volunteered at Tennessee’s Pride Fest to recruit other CASA workers to volunteer with youth in the court system.

Since moving to Delaware, Page has volunteered with CAMP Rehoboth this spring with CROP (CAMP Rehoboth Outreach Program) at the Southern Delaware Therapeutic Riding volunteer opportunity. She hopes to volunteer with CAMP Rehoboth’s YOUTH Up group and other opportunities.

Page received her bachelor’s degree in biology from Middle Tennessee State University. Her interest was pre-vet.

While in college she worked as a pet groomer and loved it so much that she became a professional groomer.

Letters 50 JUNE 18, 2021

What volunteering have you done at CAMP Rehoboth?

I am a new volunteer to CAMP Rehoboth.

I volunteered in April 2021 at the Southern Delaware Therapeutic Riding CROP event. I was given the task of painting the muck stalls. I had a blast and got to meet some cool people.

I love going out and dancing and listening to live music. Honestly, I am up for just about anything.

Page works full-time at the Millsboro and Milton locations of A Comfy Pet Grooming Salon, and says she absolutely loves her job.

What is your favorite CAMP Rehoboth event?

I would have to say that my favorite is Women’s FEST. As a breast cancer survivor, I especially love the Broadwalk on the Boardwalk and attended the virtual Broadwalk this year. I feel that it is empowering and feels amazing to walk with so many survivors and those who support us. At Women’s FEST I also love the comedians (comedy shows) and the women’s dances. I love to dance, and the Women’s FEST Welcome Thursday night dance is always a blast and I always have such a great time. I look forward to it coming back into full swing next year.

Name a childhood mentor or someone who influenced you.

My mother was, and still is, my biggest mentor. She got me involved in Girl Scouts which afforded me the opportunity to learn a variety of skills as well as the confidence to do those skills. She taught me how to be very independent, and I think she is an amazing mother.

What keeps you busy?

Well, I love my job grooming cats, dogs, and all animals. I joined the Rehoboth Beach Women’s Senior Softball League.

This is my second summer playing with that league. I also bowl on the women’s bowling league and I am on the Varsity Gay Bowling League, and this is my second-year bowling with them. I love going out dancing and listening to live music. Honestly, I am up for just about anything.

What is your fondest memory of your time in Rehoboth?

One of my fondest memories was going to the women’s bar in Dewey Beach.

That bar is no longer there, and we (women) really don’t have a place like that anymore. ▼ Karen Laitman is a member of CAMP Rehoboth’s Volunteer Development Committee.

Show your PRIDE! Proudly serving Delaware's LGBTQ+ community.

Helping you find your place in the world.

Chris Beagle REALTOR® M 215.262.6209 | O 302.273.4998 chris.beagle@compass.com Chris Beagle is a real estate licensee affiliated with Compass RE, a licensed real estate broker and abides by equal housing opportunity laws. 18335 Coastal Highway, Lewes, DE 19958

immanuel quarter 28-02_Layout 1 3/30/2018 1:54 PM Page 1

D E E N E W R SUPPORT

YOU

Immanuel Shelter serves those experiencing homelessness in Rehoboth Beach, Lewes and surrounding areas.

Your generous support allows us to continue our mission and helps our community provide assistance for those in need.

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW YOU CAN VOLUNTEER OR DONATE, PLEASE VISIT www.immanuelshelter.org 17601 Coastal Hwy, Unit 11, #431 Nassau, DE 19969 1-888-634-9992

All monies raised go directly to Immanuel located in Rehoboth Beach, Sussex County, DE.

JUNE 18, 2021

51 Letters

A big thank you

From the CAMP REHOBOTH BOARD OF DIRECTORS

THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS WANTS TO EXTEND ITS DEEPEST GRATITUDE TO EVERYONE WHO has helped to ensure CAMP Rehoboth remains a vital provider of services and programs to the LGBTQ community in Rehoboth and its related communities. Without your ongoing support, this would not have been possible.

Over the past year, the Board and staff have been laser-focused on navigating a very uncertain world.

The challenges CAMP Rehoboth faced due to the pandemic were unprecedented and happened just four months after a leadership transition. To be frank, this has been one of the toughest years in our 30-year history and, with the support of the Board, CAMP staff adjusted immediately and continued to provide services to the community.

Thanks to the dedication of our staff who worked from home, CAMP Rehoboth was able to quickly pivot to a virtual service delivery model. Navigating this new reality with limited examples to guide us, CAMP Rehoboth developed a comprehensive approach to maintain day-to-day operations. We want to share these highlights: ⊲ Transitioned

an office-based staff to a virtual workforce in a few days. productivity tools to adapt our face-to-face service delivery model to a virtual approach. ⊲ Kept members informed on the latest COVID-19 information via our website and emails. ⊲ Reached out to our members to develop ways CAMP Rehoboth volunteers could provide support to those who were homebound. ⊲ Adjusted protocols and procedures to continue providing HIV and STI testing. ⊲ Leveraged

As we enter the summer season, the Board is proud to report that CAMP Rehoboth emerges on stronger footing than many other organizations of its size. Much of that is thanks to our members and supporters for continuing to be there alongside us.

From day one of the pandemic, the health and safety of CAMP Rehoboth staff and those we serve was, and remains, our top priority. CAMP Rehoboth followed guidance regarding the response to COVID-19 provided by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, as well as the Governor’s Declaration of State of Emergency, the Delaware Division of Public Health, and the City of Rehoboth Beach to safely navigate this new territory.

As a result, CAMP Rehoboth was prepared to support the increased demand for mental health counseling to those experiencing stress and anxiety due to COVID-19, particularly among seniors and youth.

When we saw that many LGBTQ youth were cut off from their support networks at school, CAMP Rehoboth expanded its online youth programs resulting in the creation of new support networks for young people. More importantly, CAMP Rehoboth saw a 50 percent increase in participation from areas outside Rehoboth.

We want to acknowledge the hard work of our current staff including David Mariner, Sal Seeley, Anita Broccolino, Matty Brown, and Barbara Antlitz, as well as former staff members Monica Parr, Barbara Ralph, and Kerry Hallett. And we could not do this without support from community members like YOU! Separation and isolation from family and friends over the past year due to COVID-19 took a toll on everyone. The Board is well aware that the inability to meet in person, attend events, or even interact with friends at our building left many feeling disconnected from CAMP Rehoboth, too.

The Board and staff miss you and we’re just as ready as you are to see life return to a new normal. We know with you by our side, working together, we will continue Creating A More Positive Rehoboth!

With our sincerest thanks, President Chris Beagle, Vice President Wes Combs, Secretary Mike DeFlavia, Treasurer Natalie Moss, Board Members at Large Jane Blue, Pat Catanzariti, David Garrett, Leslie Ledogar, Jason Darion MathisWhite, Tara Sheldon, Leslie Sinclair

Letters 52 JUNE 18, 2021

JUNE 18, 2021

53 Letters

Letters 54 JUNE 18, 2021

JUNE 18, 2021

55 Letters

CAMP REHOBOTH BEACH GUIDE BEACH AREA LODGING Atlantic Sands Hotel, Boardwalk & Baltimore Ave.........................302-227-2511 Atlantis Inn, 154 Rehoboth Ave.....................................................302-227-9446 Breakers Hotel, 105 2nd St & Baltimore Ave.................................302-227-6688 Canalside Inn, 34 6th St.................................................................866-412-2625 Rehoboth Guest House, 40 Maryland Ave.....................................302-227-4117 Sea ‘n Stars Guest Suites, 44 Delaware Ave.................................302-226-2742 Summer Place Hotel, 1st St & Olive Ave........................................302-226-0766 The Shore Inn, 37239 Rehoboth Ave Ext.......................................302-227-8487

LEWES FOOD & DRINK Go Brit, 18388 Coastal Hwy...........................................................302-644-2250 Harbour Waterfront Dining, 134 West Market St...........................302-200-9522 Matt’s Fish Camp, 34401 Tenley Ct...............................................302-644-2267

Visit the Beach Guide Directory on the CAMP Rehoboth website to find links to these area businesses in BOLD. The Guide includes: Food and Wine, Shopping, Lodging, and Services—all at camprehoboth.com.

OTHER AREA FOOD & DRINK Bluecoast Seafood, 1111 Hwy One, Bethany................................302-539-7111 Catch 54, 54 Madison Ave, Fenwick..............................................302-436-8600 Matt’s Fish Camp, 28635 Coastal Hwy, Bethany...........................302-539-2267

SERVICES AT THE BEACH REHOBOTH RETAIL SHOPS New Wave Spas, 20660 Coastal Hwy............................................302-227-8484 Unfinished Business, Rt. 1 behind Panera Bread..........................302-645-8700

REHOBOTH ART | GALLERIES | MUSEUMS Caroline Huff, Fine Artist ...................................................www.carolinehuff.com Gallery 50, 50 Wilmington Ave......................................................302-227-2050 Philip Morton Gallery, 47 Baltimore Ave........................................302-727-0905 Rehoboth Art League, 12 Dodds Ln...............................................302-227-8408 Rehoboth Beach Museum, 511 Rehoboth Ave..............................302-227-7310

REHOBOTH FOOD & DRINK 1776 Steakhouse, Midway Shopping Center................................302-645-9355 Aqua, 57 Baltimore Ave................................................................ 302-226-9001 Back Porch Café, 59 Rehoboth Ave...............................................302-227-3674 Blue Moon, 35 Baltimore Ave........................................................302-227-6515 Café Azafran, 18 Baltimore Ave.....................................................302-227-8100 Café Papillon, Penny Lane Mall......................................................302-227-7568 Coho’s Market & Grill, 305 Rehoboth Ave......................................302-227-2646 Diego’s Bar Nightclub, 37298 Rehoboth Ave................................302-227-1023 Dos Locos, 208 Rehoboth Ave.......................................................302-227-3353 Go Fish, 24 Rehoboth Ave..............................................................302-226-1044 Goolee’s Grille, 11 South 1st St.....................................................302-227-7653 Indigo, 44 Rehoboth Ave.............................................................. 302-212-5220 Just In Thyme, 38163 Robinsons Dr..............................................302-227-3100 Lori’s Café, 39 Baltimore Ave.........................................................302-226-3066 Loves Liquors, LLC, 305c Rehoboth Ave........................................302-227-6966 Lupo Italian Kitchen, 247 Rehoboth Ave.......................................302-226-2240 Penny Lane Liquors, 42 Rehoboth Ave..........................................302-567-5245 Purple Parrot Grill, 134 Rehoboth Ave...........................................302-226-1139 Rigby’s, 404 Rehoboth Ave............................................................302-227-6080 Shorebreak Lodge, 10 Wilmington Ave.........................................302-227-1007 The Pines, 56 Baltimore Avenue....................................................302-567-2726

Letters 56 JUNE 18, 2021

BUILDING/CLEANING/REMODELING/LANDSCAPING

A.G. Renovations ...........................................................................302-947-4096 BSD, 18412 The Narrow Rd, Lewes..................................... 302-684-8588 Country Life Homes, 34882 Picnic Basket Ct................................302-231-5001 Randall-Douglas.............................................................................302-245-1439 Ron’s Repairs..................................................................................302-727-3591

CHURCHES/SYNAGOGUES

All Saints’ Episcopal, 18 Olive Ave.................................................302-227-7202 Epworth UMC, 19285 Holland Glade Rd.......................................302-227-7743 Grace of God Lutheran, ELCA, 20689 Shoppes at Long Neck.......302-947-1044 M.C.C. of Rehoboth, 19369 Plantation Rd.....................................302-645-4945 Seaside Jewish Community, 18970 Holland Glade Rd..................302-226-8977 St. Peter’s Episcopal, 2nd & Market Sts, Lewes.............................302-645-8479 Unitarian Universalist, 30486 Lewes-G’Town Hwy........................302-313-5838 Unity of Rehoboth, 98 Rudder Rd, Millsboro.................................717-579-2612 Westminster Presbyterian, 301 King Charles Ave.........................302-227-2109

COMMUNITY RESOURCES

AARP of Delaware (age 50+)..........................................................866-227-7441 ACLU of DE—Lesbian & Gay Civil Rights Project............................302-654-3966 CAMP Rehoboth Chorus—Program of CAMP Rehoboth................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth—LGBTQ Community Service Org........................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth Families—LGBTQ parents connect......................302-227-5620 CAMP Rehoboth Parents of Transgender & Gender Non-conforming Children............................................302-227-5620 Cape Henlopen Senior Center—Rehoboth (age 50+)....................302-227-2055 CHEER Centers of Sussex County (age 50+)..................................302-515-3040 Delaware Aging & Disability Resource Center...............................800-223-9074 Delaware Human Relations Commission Housing & public accommodation............................................877-544-8626 Delaware Information Line............................................................................2-1-1 Delaware Pride—Community events, annual Pride Festival..........302-265-3020 Delaware Transgender Resources—transdelaware.net, delawarelgbtq@gmail.com Delaware Transgender Support.....................................................302-402-3033

Gay/Lesbian Alcoholics Anonymous—add’l schedules..................302-856-6452 Saturdays 6 pm: Epworth UMC, 19285 Holland Glade Rd (step meeting) Saturdays 7:30 pm: All Saints’ Church, 18 Olive Ave (step meeting) Tuesdays noon: St. Peter’s Church, 211 Mulberry St, Lewes (step meeting) Thursdays noon: CAMP Rehoboth, 37 Baltimore Ave (open discussion) Sundays 9 am: CAMP Rehoboth, 37 Baltimore Ave (open discussion) Tuesdays 8 pm: CAMP Rehoboth, 37 Baltimore Ave (Young Persons) Gay Men’s Discussion Group—Program of CAMP Rehoboth.........302-227-5620 Lesbian Support Group—Program of CAMP Rehoboth..................302-227-5620 Lewes Senior Activity Center (age 50+).........................................302-645-9293 LGBTQ Student Union—University of DE, Newark.........................302-831-8066 Meals on Wheels Lewes-Rehoboth................................................302-645-7449 PFLAG-Rehoboth—2nd Tuesdays, Public Library, 111 Adams Ave, Lewes............................................................302-841-1339 SLAA and SAA—Thursdays, 7:30 pm, All Saints’ Church 18 Olive Ave ............................................................................302-745-7929 Social Security Administration—Lewes office................................800-772-1213 TransLiance of DE—Rehoboth—4th Tuesdays at 7 pm, MCC of Rehoboth; contact: TransLiance@gmail.com

INSURANCE

COUNSELING/THERAPY/LIFE COACH

PET RETAIL

Jewish Family Services........................................................ 302-478-9411 Karen Abato, ATR-BC, LPAT, Licensed Art Psychotherapist... 302-232-5330 Kevin J. Bliss, Personal/Professional Coaching.............................302-754-1954 Time to Heal Counseling & Consulting, Lewes ............................302-574-6954

EVENT PLANNING/CATERING

Flair................................................................................................302-930-0709 Palate Bistro & Catering.................................................................302-249-8489 Plate Catering.................................................................................302-644-1200

FINANCIAL SERVICES

Bell Rock Capital, 19606 Coastal Hwy..........................................302-227-7608 Black Diamond Financial Solutions,19409 Plantation Rd..............302-265-2236 Community Pride Financial............................................................302-227-2939 County Bank, 19927 Shuttle Rd.......................................... 302-226-9800 Jenn Harpel, Morgan Stanley.........................................................302-644-6620

FLORISTS

Bayberry Florist..............................................................................302-227-5725 Windsor’s Florist, 20326 Coastal Hwy...........................................302-227-9481

FUNERAL SERVICES

Parsell Funeral Homes & Crematorium................................ 302-645-9520

HAIR SALONS/TATTOO & PIERCING

Beach Cuts, 214 Rehoboth Ave...........................................302-226-ROBB Gregory Meyers Hair Studio, 20245 Bay Vista Rd & Rt 1..............302-727-5331 Stephan & Co Salon & Spa, 19266 Coastal Hwy................... 302-260-9478

HEALTH-RELATED

AIDS Delaware – Kent & Sussex Counties.....................................302-226-3519 AIDS Delaware – New Castle County............................................302-652-6776 AIDS Hotline – Delaware statewide...............................................800-422-0429 Brandywine Urology Consultants...................................................302-824-7039 Beebe Healthcare, 26744 J.J. Williams Hwy.................................302-645-3300 CAMPsafe AIDS education & prevention program of CAMP Rehoboth ..................................................................................................302-227-5620 Christiana Care HIV Wellness Clinic ..............................................302-933-3420 Christiana Care LGBTQ Health Initiatives.......................................302-733-1227 Delaware HIV Consortium - Statewide..........................................302-654-5471 Delaware Hospice..........................................................................800-838-9800 Delaware Total Foot & Ankle Center.................................... 302-297-8431 National Alliance on Mental Illness of DE (NAMI)...........................302-427-0787 Rehoboth Beach Dental, 19643 Blue Bird Ln....................... 302-226-0300 Steven B. Wright, D.M.D., 18912 J.J. Williams Hwy............. 302-645-6671 The Aesthetic Center......................................................................302-827-2125

Eric Blondin, State Farm...................................................... 302-644-3276 George Bunting, State Farm................................................ 302-227-3891 Jeanine O’Donnell, State Farm............................................ 302-645-7283

LEGAL/ACCOUNTING/TRUST SERVICES

Lawson Firm, 402 Rehoboth Ave...................................................302-226-3700 PWW Law, 1519 Savannah Rd, Lewes.......................................... 302-703-6993 Steven Falcone CPA, Taxes & Planning..........................................302-644-8634

LOCKSMITHS

Rock Lock/Robin Rohr/Your Community Locksmith.......................302-386-9166

MASSAGE THERAPY/FITNESS

Midway Fitness & Racquetball, Midway Center.............................302-645-0407 One Spirit Massage, 169 Rehoboth Ave........................................302-226-3552 Rehoboth Massage/Alignment.......................................................302-727-8428

OUTDOOR LIGHTING

Allure Outdoor Lighting, allureoutdoorlighting.com......................302-226-2532 Critter Beach, 156 Rehoboth Ave..................................................302-226-2690 Pet Portraits by Monique................................................................717-650-4626

PET SERVICES

Brandywine Valley SPCA, 22918 Dupont Blvd, G’twn.......... 302-856-6361 Delaware Humane Association, 18675 Coastal Hwy........... 302-200-7159 Parsell Pet Crematorium, 16961 Kings Hwy, Lewes............ 302-645-7445

REAL ESTATE

Allen Jarmon, NextHome Tomorrow Realty...................................302-745-5122 Bill Peiffer, Patterson Schwartz, 18958 Coastal Hwy....................302-703-6987 Chris Beagle, Berkshire Hathaway, 37230 Rehoboth Ave............302-227-6101 Debbie Reed Team, 319 Rehoboth Ave.........................................800-263-5648 Donna Whiteside, Berkshire Hathaway, 16712 Kings Hwy...........302-381-4871 Eric Atkins, Patterson-Schwartz, 18958 Coastal Hwy...................302-727-1456 Hugh Fuller, Realtor........................................................................302-745-1866 John Black, Patterson Schwartz, 18958 Coastal Hwy...................302-703-6987 Lana Warfield, Berkshire Hathaway, 37230 Rehoboth Ave...........302-227-6101 Lee Ann Wilkinson Group, 16698 Kings Hwy....................... 302-645-6664 Lingo Realty, 246 Rehoboth Ave....................................................302-227-3883 McGuiness Group, 246 Rehoboth Ave...........................................302-227-3883 Randy Mason/Shirley Kalvinsky, Lingo Realty................................302-227-3883 Sea Bova Associates, 20250 Coastal Hwy........................... 302-227-1222 Troy Roberts, Mann & Sons, 414 Rehoboth Ave............................302-228-7422

RETIREMENT LIVING/SENIOR CARE FACILITIES

Springpoint Choice, 17028 Cadbury Cir, Lewes............................302-313-6658 The Lodge at Truitt Homestead, 36233 Farm Ln.................. 302-232-6372

TRAVEL & TRANSPORTATION

Accent On Travel, 37156 Rehoboth Ave.............................. 302-278-6100 CHEER Transportation (age 50+)....................................................302-856-4909 ITN Southern Delaware (age 60+ or disabled)...............................302-448-8486 Jolly Trolley Shuttle from Rehoboth Ave & Boardwalk...................302-644-0400 Olivia Travel...........................................................800-631-6277 ext. 696

POPULAR LGBTQ BEACHES

Poodle Beach, south end of the Rehoboth Boardwalk Cape Henlopen State Park, Ocean Dr north to Cape Henlopen State Park. Daily parking rate in effect March-November

JUNE 18, 2021

57 Letters

Words Matter

BY CLARENCE FLUKER

LGBTQIA+ IDK

I

spent more than 20 minutes on the phone with a friend last week, searching the internet and discussing the definitions of the terms non-binary, gender fluid, and gender-nonconforming. That impromptu research session was spurred on by the proclamation of another friend less than a week before. Their announcement made us realize that neither of us was sure that our understanding of those terms was correct. We had a friend who was evolving, and we knew we had some learning to do.

Before we peppered our friend with too many questions that they may not have been comfortable answering, we wanted to educate ourselves.

Because we care, we want our friendship circle to be a place for understanding, celebrating truth and belonging. That is the purpose of friendNavigating changing ship and community.

I acknowledge it is not alvocabulary around gender ways easy—not because identity and sexual of lack of will, but more often because of a pure orientation requires that we lack of knowledge. offer ourselves and others Several years ago, I moderated a table grace. Grace affords us the discussion with LGBTQ+ opportunity to educate and high school and college students. It was a lively be educated, and it can help conversation until I made us stitch this beautiful and a critical mistake, one that caused a moment diverse quilt of community of silence and a flurry of nervous eyes darting together. across the table. I was at a loss. Things seemed to have been going so well until that point. I did not know then what had broken the flow. Finally, one student spoke up. I had used the wrong pronoun in directing my last question to a student. Embarrassed and heartbroken that I had offended her, I apologized to her and the entire group. Then I reset the table by asking each of the students to share their preferred pronouns. Thankfully, the student and her peers offered me grace. That situation was a teachable moment for me: I had much more learning to do.

Over the last 20 years, I have witnessed the once universally accepted acronym GLBT evolve, from GLBT to LGBT to LGBTQ to LGBTQIA and, even more recently, to LGBTQIA+. Depending on who you ask, the Q could mean questioning, or it could mean queer. Two-Spirit and same-gender-loving (SGL) Letters 58 JUNE 18, 2021

folks are sometimes forgotten altogether. I typically identify as gay on surveys if SGL is not listed as an option, though it was my preferred term for years. I know that there are people in the community who have never even heard of SGL. Many are not even familiar with Two-Spirit.

The language we use to identify ourselves is personal and often influenced by our generation, geography, race, social circles, ethnicity, and other factors. The language we use to describe our sexual orientation and gender identity evolves by how it is understood in society, just as it does for every individual based on where they are in their journey.

When I was in college, none of my friends ever used the word queer. In fact, we would cringe if we heard it. Today, it seems to be embraced by many.

Language, definitions, and ideas around sexual orientation and gender identity are fluid and constantly changing. Within and outside of our community, people—even those with the best intentions—will not always get the language or definitions right. It is okay not to know what word to use or what a phrase means. However, it is not okay to ignore someone’s preferred pronouns for the sake of expediency or personal disinterest. Furthermore, it is not okay to simply disregard someone’s feelings or be intentionally disrespectful of how someone shows up in the world and takes claim over their own identity. And it is not okay not to care. We should all care and commit to doing our best.

Navigating changing vocabulary around gender identity and sexual orientation requires that we offer ourselves and others grace. Grace affords us the opportunity to educate and be educated, and it can help us stitch this beautiful and diverse quilt of community together. There will be times when a person or group does not get it right. It could very well be you. But in those instances, we should allow for some learning and extend some grace. ▼ Clarence J. Fluker is a public affairs and social impact strategist. Since 2008, he’s also been a contributing writer for Swerv, a lifestyle periodical celebrating African American LGBTQ+ culture and community. Follow him on Twitter: @CJFluker or Instagram: Mr_CJFluker

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302-227-9481 JUNE 18, 2021

59 Letters

Before the Beach

BY MICHAEL GILLES

If One Is Suffering…

R

ehoboth’s nearby sister town of Milton is known for its massive Dogfish Head Brewery and its quaint little downtown. Named for the 17th century poet, John Milton, it serves as the lazy mouth of the Broadkill River and the home of Wagamons Pond, with its bounty of fish ready for the taking. But somewhere on the outskirts of town, hiding among homes and housing developments, lies the Double L Ranch.

Not one of the numerous farms that mark the area, but a smaller version with four acres, two stunning horses, six plucky free-range chickens, and a ferocious watchdog named Bella.

(Note that the oh-so-dangerous Bella bolted toward me on a recent visit and, you guessed it, joyously licked my hand.)

And what makes this ranch so special?

Not the shamelessly friendly watchdog; not the cottage made of steel that was featured on the DIY network; certainly not the random mounds of horse manure (who knew that horses could be so…productive?). No, what defines the heart of this place is its owner, Jeri Berc.

Walking the ranch (and watching where I walk) with the inimitable Dr. Berc (aka Dr. Dirt) illuminates this fascinating person. Jeri is a retired soil scientist and conservationist who lives off the land.

While a slice of meat may occasionally land on her plate, Jeri is mostly a vegetarian, feeding herself from the edible landscape of the Double L. There are fruit and nut trees, and a feast of complementary vegetables. Corn, beans, and squash,

the three sisters of the garden, are grown in a cold frame next to a shed made out of recycled wood. Plus, the ranch survives on recycled rainwater. The place is a shining example of sustainable living.

Jeri has always been fascinated with the soil. Her resume reads like a kid in a sandbox. She is certified in landscape design and maintenance and has a Master’s Degree and a Ph.D. in Soil Science from

She lives her life hoping to inspire others to make a change for good; to live a life of sustainable giving. the University of California, Berkeley. After her school years, she worked in many environment-related areas. She was the United States technical delegate for international United Nations environmental treaty negotiations. At the USDA, she was active in including carbon sequestration efforts to combat climate change.

While I was busy napping in the early 1970s, she became an activist. She fought for ending the Vietnam War, marched for women’s liberation, and joined political collectives. She boarded a ship in Canada and went to Cuba, where she worked side by side with Cubans harvesting sugar cane. She vigorously rallied for gay liberation, bravely coming out in 1971.

Jeri and her wife, Gail Hecky, have long been associated with CAMP Reho-

both. They both are long-time members of the CAMP Rehoboth Chorus. Jeri’s work with CAMP Rehoboth’s Volunteer on Vacation program (the precursor to today’s CAMP Rehoboth Outreach Program) included kids visiting the Double L Ranch, where Jeri likes to share her knowledge with Cape students.

Jeri’s long history of giving has brought a new opportunity to her doorstep. She is the founder of 100 Women Who Care Southern Delaware, which is a newly formed giving circle of the 100 Who Care Alliance, which has over 600 chapters worldwide. The purpose of the group is to bundle contributions to local nonprofit organizations to stimulate and amplify giving. Each member or team of her chapter will give $100, four times a year, to a local nonprofit that they choose each quarter. They now have 65 women in their Founders Circle and are inviting others to join.

When asked what her life mission is, she says she has renewed energy from this new venture. She will get a chance to stimulate and empower others, and set an example for those who need giving in their lives. She lives her life hoping to inspire others to make a change for good; to live a life of sustainable giving.

After all, she says, “if one is suffering, we all suffer.” ▼ Michael Gilles is a playwright, actor, and director from Milton, and a regular contributor to Letters from CAMP Rehoboth.

Be the Change 100 Women Who Care Southern Delaware is a newly forming giving circle of the international 100 Who Care Alliance.

They had their first giving meeting in April.

SoDel Concepts is providing a room at their Fish On restaurant in Lewes and will donate 10 percent of the luncheon revenue to the chosen nonprofit. The giving circle is also looking for corporate partners to match donations. They are encouraging women from the area to check out the organiLetters 60 JUNE 18, 2021

zation. “Giving with a group is empowering. Come join us!”

The next meeting of 100 Women Who Care Southern Delaware will be in July on a date to be determined. For more information about the organization or to join their efforts, please email Jeri Berc at 100womencaresd@gmail. com, call Jeri at 302 233 6897, or visit their Facebook page, 100 Women Who Care Southern Delaware. ▼

JUNE 18, 2021

61 Letters

We Are Committed, TO YOUR CARE.

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JUNE 18, 2021

63 Letters

CAMP Houses

BY RICH BARNETT

The Last Guest House

T

he guest house and its kissing cousin—the bed and breakfast— have long been lodging fixtures in Rehoboth. But did you know there is now only one official guest house still operating in town? And get this—it’s been a gay establishment since the late 1970s.

I had no idea until recently when I met Tom Kelch, the innkeeper and de facto historian of the Rehoboth Guest House at 40 Maryland Avenue. Tom, a trained baker before moving to Rehoboth eight years ago to manage the place, was so kind as to spend a couple of hours talking to me about the house he’s come to love. It’s an interesting story and a fitting one for this Pride edition of Letters.

The first record of the house Tom has been able to find is from 1887. It was owned by the Horsey family. “The irony here,” Tom tells me, “is that much of the land on this block of Maryland Avenue previously supported two horse liveries.”

He shows me some early photos that suggest the original house was a two-story gable-roofed frame dwelling with an attic and a porch that spanned the front

Letters 64 JUNE 18, 2021

of the house and wrapped around one side. The porch featured (and still does) turned posts and decorative scroll-sawn brackets. It’s a unique version of a traditional Sussex County farmhouse that was built here in Rehoboth.

Following a major storm in 1914, a second house was moved away from the ocean block and physically attached to the back of the Horsey house. Ownership records are somewhat sketchy for the next 60 years, but Tom explains that at some point the property began operating as a guesthouse called The Swarthmorean. He has photos of old newspaper advertisements touting rooms by the sea.

A Washington, DC school for children with disabilities purchased it as a summer vacation residence for a few years. According to a long-time Maryland Avenue resident, many neighbors gave the school a hard time because they disliked sharing the beach with the children.…

In late 1978 or early 1979, Herbert Koerber purchased it and with his partner, Abelardo Ortiz Benavides (known as Mummy), turned it into the Paradise

Guest House catering exclusively to gay men. It was, Tom believes, the first openly gay business in Rehoboth. Of course, gays and lesbians had been coming to Rehoboth since the 1950s, but they stayed mostly in private homes they owned and/or rented, as I’ve written about in previous columns.

Herbert and Mummy embarked on a number of changes to create their vision of paradise. “They added a big deck on the second floor for sunbathing,” Tom explains as he leads me up the back steps. “It included a stage for impromptu drag performances and some barbells and dumbbells for nude workouts.” As if that weren’t enough, the owners turned the attic into two large orgy rooms and the basement into a sex dungeon. This I had to see, so we went into the basement. “You’d enter it through a trap door and climb down a ladder.” Unfortunately, he hasn’t been able to find photos of the dungeon, which is now just a typical basement used for storage.

Rooms at the Paradise were cheap and bareboned. Some didn’t have doors or walls, only curtain dividers. Herbert and Mummy charged extra for showers, towels, and air conditioners. There were no TVs, but there was a pay phone. “It was the most profitable item in the guest house,” Tom says with a laugh. “You also could pitch a tent in the back yard for $5.”

It is an interesting piece of Rehoboth’s gay history, that’s for sure, one that Tom is helping LGBTQ historian James T. Sears (who lives in Rehoboth now) delve into with much greater detail and with personal remembrances from guests

Rooms at the Paradise were cheap and bareboned. Some didn’t have doors or walls, only curtain dividers. Herbert and Mummy charged extra for showers, towels, and air conditioners. who stayed at the Paradise. It’ll be a continuation of Sears’ research on the queering of Rehoboth (some of which has been featured here in Letters) and part of his book on the same topic which is due out next summer—a must read for sure!

In 1988, a couple named Bill and Bob bought the guest house and renamed it the Rehoboth Guest House. They cleaned it up and converted the attic into a full-sized third floor with proper rooms.

They stabilized the back deck. They also began to welcome anyone, not just gay men. Current owners Frank and Garrett bought it in 2013, and undertook major structural and cosmetic renovations to bring the guest house into the 21st century, including doing away with many smaller rooms on the first floor, opening up the public living room space, and

putting in a big modern kitchen.

They also hired Tom to run the guest house, which today features 18 bedrooms and 16 bathrooms. And there’s not a piece of white wicker in the entire place. I checked. It has a very contemporary West Elm look with touches of old Rehoboth like period door and window moldings, the original stairway banister, framed vintage photos, and posters and postcards of Rehoboth displayed on the walls. And, of course, the big front porch with comfortable rocking chairs. Tom says Frank and Garrett made it a point to renovate but preserve the original feel of the house.

Another surprise about the guest house is that its current clientele is 85 percent repeat guests and one-third straight. I chat up a few and hear just how

personal the guest house is to them. It feels like home. And they love Tom and Cosmo, the unofficial house dog, a beagle/Chihuahua mix. One straight gentleman who visits every year explained how meeting Tom and the other guests helped him better understand his gay son and gay people in general. Others mention how the guest house and its clientele enhance their appreciation for our truly unique town. I don’t know about you, but during Pride month, it certainly makes me proud to know we’ve still got such a place in town. ▼ Rich Barnett is the author of The Discreet Charms of a Bourgeois Beach Town, and Fun with Dick and James.

JUNE 18, 2021

65 Letters

NEW COMEDY

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

How I Learned to Date Men After Dating Women for So Long

I

n a basement classroom my freshman year of college, I heard a woman with purple hair say, “I came out to my parents as queer when I was 13. And I came out to them as kinky last year.”

I had so many questions.

Should any mother have to hear that her daughter wants to be consensually beaten in a hot way? Why would someone say “queer” instead of lesbian or bisexual—like, who did she want to get kinky with anyway? Would I, a basic bisexual from the suburbs, with no romantic experience with women outside of a multi-year infatuation with a straight girl I wrote tortured poetry about, ever be able to fit in with the other women at this Queer Women’s Mixer? I decided, no, I would not.

It wasn’t cool to be bisexual in the conservative Christian suburb where I grew up, but it definitely wasn’t cool to be an uninformed square in a sundress too terrified to make eye contact with women I was attracted to either. “No one will ever take me seriously as a queer person if I don’t date some women or at least get a better haircut,” I thought. I went back to my freshman dorm and decided to join a sorority instead. After spending so many years in the closet, what were a few more?

Maybe it’s true—there’s a lid for every pot. A year later I was deeply in love with Molly, another lady from the same suburb. We both wore sundresses.

It was a proverbial us-against-the-world romance, and I didn’t care who knew I loved her. Despite my insecurities about being too basic, too femme, and too bi, being in love with a woman allowed me to finally feel I had the right to claim queer identity.

“I’m bisexual,” I announced at a monthly sorority meeting. “I don’t care if anyone here has a problem with that!” My sorority sisters, in retrospect, looked surprisingly unperturbed. “Kate,” someone said to me, “no one minds that you’re bisexual. But we need you to

Letters 66 JUNE 18, 2021

stop using the house chores email list to invite people to Iraq War protests.”

There was no neutral on a moving train! I quit the sorority and I was ready to live as a full-time queer. I came out to my parents. I moved into a queer co-op and spent the weekends at dance parties and dumpster diving with people

I guess if you really press me on it, I’m bisexual, or pansexual, and maybe even demisexual, because so much of sexual attraction for me, at this moment, requires emotional connection. who, for the first time in my life, made me feel a sense of true community.

This community helped me throw the DIY wedding where I married Molly.

Multiple former sorority sisters came out of the closet in the years following—it turned out that there’s something kind

of gay about wanting to spend all of your time with attractive people of the same sex. As Molly and I built a life together, I stopped identifying as bi, and just identified as her wife.

When we broke up a few years later, I felt like I was losing not only my relationship, but my identity. I went on dates with a few women, but pretty quickly ended up in a rebound relationship with a guy that lasted four years. I was so worried my friends from the co-op would reject me if I lost my queer cred. They didn’t. It turned out they, to use a bisexual cliché, “were just into the person.”

I mostly date men now; I genuinely don’t know if that’s because I’m more attracted to them. The process of trying to figure out how to date guys after so many years of not doing it was so funny and so traumatic, I had to write a whole audiobook to parse through it.

Right now, I’m—say, a Kinsey 2. I guess if you really press me on it, I’m bisexual, or pansexual, and maybe even demisexual, because so much of sexual attraction for me, at this moment, requires emotional connection.

It’s changed a thousand times. I expect it to change again. Maybe when I’m 80 years old I will look back on the past 30 beautiful years I spent in a multigender polycule. I sometimes feel guilty, like I don’t have a right to claim queer identity if it’s been X number of days or years since I’ve done something gay.

But who I’m with doesn’t erase my past, my politics, and the lifelong process of reckoning with, and ultimately failing at, hetero-expectations. ▼ Kate Willett’s Audible Original, Dirtbag Anthropology, is available now on Audible at audible.com/dirtbag.

JUNE 18, 2021

67 Letters

THANK YOU for making Milton Pride 2021 a success!

We're very grateful for your support, participation, and enthusiasm. You helped us show the community that Pride truly is UNIVERSAL! See you all next year!

SATURDAY, OCT 16

HOMECOMING GET THE LATEST UPDATES

www.MiltonTheatre.com www.facebook.com/MiltonZombieFest

Letters 68 JUNE 18, 2021

ENTERTAINMENT MINUTES FROM THE BEACHES! June 19 - ERIC ANTHONY LOPEZ / 7:30PM June 20 - FROM STONEWALL TO NOW: Drag Show / 8PM June 24 - LOWER CASE BLUES: Quayside@Nite / 7PM June 25 - MISS DELAWARE PAGEANT: Finals Night / 7PM June 27 - MANDIE STEVENSON: Psychic Medium / 7:30PM June 30 - DELAWARE NATIONAL GUARD 287th BAND / 7:30PM July 1 - HOOCHI COOCHI: Quayside@Nite / 7PM THE JUDY & BARBRA SHOW July 2 - LATIN EXPLOSION: Stand-Up Comedy / 8PM New England's #1 Impersonators July 3 - INDEPENDENCE DAY DANCE PARTY: Quayside@Nite/ 7PM June 26 - Saturday - 8PM July 8 - MAMA'S BLACK SHEEP: Quayside@Nite / 7PM July 10 - BARK AT THE MOON: Ozzy Tribute / 8PM July 15 - ED SHOCKLEY & FRIENDS: Quayside@Nite / 7PM July 16 - DEANNA FITZPATRICK: Psychic Medium / 8PM July 17 - ALMOST U2: Achtung Baby Anniversary Tribute / 3PM & 8PM July 22 - LOWER CASE BLUES: Quayside@Nite / 7PM July 23 - SHAYNE SMITH: Stand Up Comedy / 8PM July 24 - KASHMIR: Led Zeppelin Show / 3PM & 8PM

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For more information on tickets, show details, and full events calendar go to:

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302.684.3038 110 Union St. Milton, DE

JUNE 18, 2021

69 Letters

Regal in Rehoboth

BY FAY JACOBS

Our Drag Queen Cover Girls Glow with Pride

W

hile every month is Pride month here in Rehoboth, it’s perfect that the Letters cover for June (the official Pride Month) features a bevy of beauties well-known and much appreciated here in town.

From left on the cover, Julia Sugarbaker II, Mona Lotts, Magnolia Applebottom, and Roxy Overbrooke.

Saturday nights at The Pines, Mona and Kristina Kelly present A Night of Divas with their friends, while they reappear on Sunday for the Drag Brunch. Kristina takes the lead on Show Tune Tuesdays, also upstairs at The Pines.

Not to be outdone, Julia can be found on Sundays at Shrimpy’s with some of her besties while Roxy Overbrooke and Magnolia hold forth at the Blue Moon, with Magnolia Applebottom often seen flouncing around at Diego’s.

Magnolia recently had her own show for Pride Month at the Milton Theatre. She even hosts game night at the Blue Moon on Wednesdays and her own show on Sundays.

The girls are on stage several nights a week and for brunches around town.

And you can often find them—and many more—in full regalia (or not) at other venues like Port 251, Goolies Drag Brunches, and who knows where else.

If I’ve missed mentioning any of your shows or venues, mea culpa! You are all, ALL over!

There’s also great anticipation about the opening of Freddie’s Beach Bar in the spot vacated by The Pond.

That establishment is sure to host drag performers and add to the roster of creative, talented, fabulous drag queens at the beach.

On July 4th Weekend, you best look out for a group of legendary Pie Ladies making scheduled stops in downtown Rehoboth, perhaps by Jolly Trolley, and for certain delivering yummy pies to selected households. If you’re lucky, you’ll run into them in time to catch the clever skits they devise. Lore has it that the skits are slightly more on script

Letters 70 JUNE 18, 2021

during the early part of their tour.

Curious about those gorgeous costumes and the high hair those gals

...it has never been easier for a queen to show some cleavage, for the girls to find their voice, or for a fan to find a show. show up in? It’s not unusual for our queens to have oodles and oodles of wigs. When Letters last inquired, Mona Lotts had lots and lots, topping out at close to 150. Magnolia cops to over 100.

Thanks to Ru Paul, drag queens are 100 percent mainstream these days and CAMP Rehoboth has had a long history with drag queens—Gladys Kravitz was the original spokesperson for the safe sex program, CAMPsafe, nearly 20 years ago—but it has never been easier for a queen to show some cleavage, for the girls to find their voice, or for a fan to find a show.

Steeped in tradition to go along with our history, the art of drag is alive and well in Rehoboth and environs. These performers are professional, hilarious, and wickedly witty. They sing, sync, and sashay to the glee of thousands of audience members each summer season.

So hustle around Rehoboth Beach and enjoy what these girls have to offer. ▼ Fay Jacobs is the author of five published books and is touring with her one-woman sitdown comedy show, Aging Gracelessly.

Photo: Roxy Overbrooke

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71 Letters

COVID Health

BY TYLER BERL AND JORDAN HINES

COVID’S IMPACT

Underserved Delawareans: A Familiar Story

W

hile more and more Delawareans receive COVID-19 vaccinations, the state is seeing a notable drop in testing for the virus—a trend throughout the US. Public health experts say that, considered together, this is a positive development wrapped in a potentially worrisome one. Just as concerning, healthcare disparities persist in Delaware in the distribution of COVID-19 vaccines. As an example, Blacks make up 23 percent of Delaware’s population, yet account for just 12 percent of fully-vaccinated Delawareans as of May 6.

The effectiveness of testing as a strategy for slowing the spread of communicable diseases is a lesson Delaware learned during an earlier epidemic—one that shares vast similarities to what we are experiencing today in our state—the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV).

This is something that we at the Delaware HIV Consortium, and the state’s other AIDS service organizations, have dealt with before.

Today, over 35 years since the onset of the AIDS epidemic and just over a year since the beginning of this new pandemic, Delawareans living with HIV, and populations with similar socio-demographic characteristics, are experiencing an outsized impact of COVID-19 and will be for the foreseeable future. Additional support from the federal government, the state of Delaware, and our communities as a whole is called for in this time to meet these needs.

Earlier this year, the University of Delaware’s Disaster Research Center, in collaboration with the Delaware HIV Consortium, conducted a study examining the social and community impacts of COVID-19 on Delawareans living with HIV. The study’s report, COVID-19: Impacts on Delawareans Living with HIV1, was released by UD in March. It presents findings from this qualitative study, which focused on those in our community in greatest need of economic Letters 72 JUNE 18, 2021

and healthcare support—those receiving benefits from Delaware’s Ryan White HIV/AIDS Program.

The study’s findings highlight the many difficulties people living with HIV dealt with during the COVID pandemic, many of which—housing and food insecurity, inconsistent access to transportation, healthcare and technology (including telehealth), elevated anxiety, depression, and trouble with maintaining sobriety—can be directly or indirectly linked to economic instability. As was found for many Delawareans living with HIV, COVID-19 exacerbated an already untenable financial situation.

As was found for many Delawareans living with HIV, COVID-19 exacerbated an already untenable financial situation.

Many low-income people living with HIV are being forced to choose between life-sustaining activities—moving in with unrelated housemates who may not follow safety precautions, taking on additional jobs that frequently expose them to the public, or sharing protective gear—that vastly elevate their risk for COVID, and financial trouble “These are decisions that could cost you your life, or someone else’s life,” noted one study participant.

Yet, these challenges are not just affecting those with HIV. With 11 percent of Delaware residents living below the poverty line, tens of thousands of others are feeling these same challenges.

Even after all Delawareans have access to the vaccines, the state will

need to remain vigilant and maintain a robust COVID testing system.

There is more that we could, and should, do as a state to take advantage of the current moment to both address the new challenges that populations most impacted by COVID are experiencing, and ensure that we are prepared for our next crisis: → Build on the state’s existing COVID-19 testing framework to expand and strengthen access to preventative health services—screening and testing— particularly targeted to under-resourced populations. → Prioritize investment to ensure access to, and training for, using technology for low-income and other marginalized Delawareans to reduce barriers to healthcare services. → Increase support for Delaware’s social service sector who, during this past year and into the future, make up much of the social safety net for Delawareans and help keep them connected to vital services including healthcare, support services, and food and housing assistance.

When there is no longer a need for COVID testing sites, we are all hoping to get back to a sense of normalcy. However, reaching normalcy will be hard for many Delawareans, including some Delawareans living with HIV and others that COVID-19 substantively affected.

Investing in these three proposed areas should help ensure that as a state we are prepared to help meet these needs. ▼ 1 Report available at: drc.udel.edu/SiteAssets/ drc_covid_hiv_report/index.aspx

Tyler Berl is Executive Director of the Delaware HIV Consortium. Jordan Hines is HIV Community Planning Manager with the Delaware HIV Consortium.

JUNE 18, 2021

73 Letters

CAMPshots

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

Summer Unmasked THIS PAGE: 1) at Diego’s Monique B., Monique T., Nick Lee, Dolf Verhoeven, Geneen Mitchell, Monique Mitchell, (back row) Gayle Dumonceaux, Paula Walker, Karen Anderson, Brenda Dunn, (front) Charlotte Hayes, Punna Khanna Hayes, Sharon Still, Kay Creech, Tameca Waid, Tanya Reid, Tim Willenbucher, John Uychocde, Todd Hoffman, Marc, Greg.

OPPOSITE PAGE: 2) at Mariachi’s Libby Stiff, Judy Gorra, Chris Stanley, Joyce Rokko, Stephanie Allison, Bea Wagner; 3) at Square One Martini Bar and Restaurant Bonnie Quesenberry, Fay Jacobs, Muriel Hogan, Kathy Wiz; 4) Drag Supper at Shrimpy’s Bar & Grill Jose, John Kirk, Angie Robles, Jay-Xavier Johnson, Amber Graham, Virginia Kilgore, Brianna Totten, Tabitha Brennan, Joe Vaughn, John Curtz, Tuti Ortiz, Diamond Doll, Ty Boyer, Jeremy Henry, Matt King, Tyler King, Ritza Alston; 5) at Poodle Beach Jared Salvestrini, Josh Shrout, Bobby Kilpatrick, Tuan Huyhn, Curt Leciejewski, Tracy Rossetti, Forest Park, Mark Kimble.

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75 Letters

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH (Continued from page 75) THIS PAGE: 1) at Poodle Beach Mike Wilkinson, Samer Alhawandoh, Will Tuttle, Brent Quinn, Philippe Poirier, Michael Solonoski, Steve Morris; 2) at Purple Parrot Brian Sparrow, Jamie Romano, Kevin Naff; 3) in Rehoboth Beach Bill Fuchs, Max Dick; 4) at Dewey Arts & Fun Fest Kim Witmer, Kim Schuler, Susan Shollenberger, Beave Bievenou, Renate Costner, Laura Reitman.

OPPOSITE PAGE: 5) in Rehoboth Beach Kim Nelson, Lori Simmons, Tama Viola, Anita Broccolino, Kaye Sullivan, Lexi Gardner, Jen Leonard, Claire McCracken; 6) at Aqua Chad, Matthew Kahan, Robert Donohoe, Derek Dixon, Micah Moon, Dan Gibbs, Michael Rich, Eugene Hallock, Kent Swartz, Chris Hughes.

(More CAMPshots on page 96)

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77 Letters

Q Puzzle Somewhere Under the Rainbow ACROSS 1 Movie icon Jane 8 Rosie’s Sleepless in ___ 15 Toronto’s province 16 Cut 17 Start of a line from a Randy Rainbow takeoff 19 Catwoman portrayer Eartha 20 Lucci in All My Children 21 Art Deco design name 22 Get the cappuccino foamy 24 Having no play 27 “Get out!” to Orton, with “off” 28 Condenses, as a book 32 More of the line 36 End of the line 40 Melville tale 41 Where to find hot buns 43 Part of a “Tommy” title 44 R&B singer Lou 46 A. Lincoln, e.g.

48 Some actors have big ones 49 Call placer 51 Is in the hole 53 Summer for Rimbaud 54 Crazy like a fox 55 Vardalos of Connie & Carla 57 Salt licks 59 Singer of the original song

Solution on Page 108 6 2 Vows now legal for all 64 Hollywood Squares choice 65 Skin designs, for short 68 Sam twitched it on Bewitched 69 Kevin Bacon movie of the ‘80s 70 Crude material 71 Cry out for 72 Drag spikes 73 Dallas actor Keenan DOWN 1 Stones 2 In the dark 3 Tennessee, but not Williams 4 Vixen’s master 5 Work unit 6 Enjoy with the tongue 7 Marlene’s role in Blue Angel 8 Singer O’Connor 9 Elton John’s lang.

10 UNC is in it 11 Q to a Scrabble player 12 Old Russian despots 13 Slow, to Saint-Saens 14 Tidied the lawn 18 Captain Jack Sparrow, e.g.

23 Hoolihan’s M*A*S*H rank 25 “I’m not touching that!”

26 Some like them hot

2 9 Harper Lee’s Radley 30 Say whether you’re coming 31 Popeye’s ___’ Pea 32 What Hamlet was reading 33 Online letters 34 “When pigs fly!”

35 Turnpike fee 37 Like the rep of 59-Across 38 Act badly 39 Hoped for answers to come-ons 42 Movie preceder, once 45 Tickle pink 47 Packaging devices 50 Saudi Arabian capital 52 Patty Hearst’s former org.

56 Texas A&M athlete 58 Trailing behind 60 Treated as a sexual object 61 Composer Thomas 62 P-town’s Crowne Pointe, e.g.

63 Deer in Maria’s song 66 Caesar’s X 67 Taxpayer’s ID

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Letters 78 JUNE 18, 2021

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79 Letters

Homes for Transgender Women

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

Tiny Houses. Big Futures.

H

ome is where the heart is. But sadly, too many people full, with a waiting list. She ended up opening her own house are heartless when it comes to those who are hometo those in need, even though it was against the community less. Especially when those people are trans women center’s policy. It was “very grass roots,” Gore says. “Very word of color. of mouth.”

Ten years ago, when Kayla Gore (pictured at right with a Eventually Gore and others got the opportunity to buy a client) experienced homelessness and needed emergency house that could shelter multiple people. But there was still shelter, “there was nothing out a great need for permanence. there for me,” she says. She “What we realized in our jourslept in parks. She did not feel ney with My Sistah’s House safe or secure. was that when we became Today, Gore works to comhomeowners we had a lot more bat homelessness for transautonomy over how we govgender women of color in her erned our space,” Gore says hometown of Memphis. Gore on IMPACT. “So we wanted to is a co-founder of My Sistah’s pass that blessing on to the House, an organization that individuals in our membership, provides emergency housing, which is home ownership in the support, meals, and other form of a tiny house.” resources to people experiencIn June of 2020, Gore ing homelessness. Her story is started a GoFundMe with the one of six featured in the new goal of building 20 tiny houses anthology documentary series, to give trans women of color If there’s one thing I’d like people to know IMPACT with Gal Gadot, now on a safe place to call their own.

National Geographic’s YouTube Why tiny houses? “Cost,” says about trans folks it’s that we’re human, that channel.

Gore. Tiny houses are more we have feelings, and that we’re worthy.

The series highlights the economical to build, which Everything that we’re asking for or everything stories of women around the means My Sistah’s House can world who are working to afford to build more homes in that we’re entitled to, we are worthy of it. better their communities, like order to help more people.

Kameryn Everett, a figure skater “We want to be able to help who coaches and empowers young Black girls in Detroit, and people plan ahead,” says Gore. “These homes will allow people Arianna Font Martin, who set out to get clean drinking water to to plan for five years or plan for 10 years. People can go back people in Puerto Rico after 2017’s devastating hurricane. to school; people can actually live a full life thriving versus only Gadot, who is famously this generation’s onscreen Wonder being able to plan for a week or a month in advance.” In other Woman, refers to Gore and the other women she highlights words, giving someone a home is giving them a future. in the series as her “Women of Wonder,” as she called them The biggest challenge My Sistah’s House faces is, not surduring the virtual Television Critics Association press tour prisingly, resources. Demand for its services have only gone recently. up during the pandemic. “For the need to be so great, and for According to IMPACT, homelessness in the trans populathe resources to not be as great, that’s always an issue for us,” tion is three times higher than the general population. While Gore says. some cities have shelter beds set aside for transgender peo“My life experiences make me want to make sure that trans ple, Memphis is not one of them. In fact, admittance to a shelwomen don’t have to endure what I endured,” Gore says, tearing ter is often based on biological sex, which leaves transgender up as the cameras roll on IMPACT. “If there’s one thing I’d like people with few options. “So most trans people choose not people to know about trans folks it’s that we’re human, that we to use the services of shelters here in Memphis,” Gore says in have feelings, and that we’re worthy. Everything that we’re askIMPACT. ing for or everything that we’re entitled to, we are worthy of it.”

My Sistah’s House grew out of a need for options for the trans women of color who would come seeking emergency The bulk of My Sistah’s House’s funding comes from individual donors. shelter at the LGBTQ community center OUTMemphis where To learn more about My Sistah’s House and to make a donation, visit Gore was working. mshmemphis.org.

According to Gore, there were only a couple of organizations that allowed trans women, but those places were always Letters 80 JUNE 18, 2021

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81 Letters

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JUNE 18, 2021

83 Letters

arts+entertainment

BY DOUG YETTER

SPOTLIGHT ON THE

arts

CAMP Rehoboth Puts Art at the Heart of Our Community

Interdependence Day Of Pride I’ve always thought that “Independence Day” was a misnomer. We declared our independence and gained it through fighting and winning a war—but George Washington didn’t single-handedly smite the British. It took legions of like-minded people willing to sacrifice everything to achieve that goal. We were, and remain, an interdependent nation. How can we not give thanks for

the multitude of people who create the supply chain to provide our food, clothing, housing, and transportation?

Every year, our relatively tiny state generates nearly $150 million in revenue from arts and culture—because we recognize and respect the intersectional/interdependent nature of our community. Every show needs a director, cast, costume/lighting/sound/

A Celebration of Life with Pride: In Honor and Memory of Lee Wayne Mills Lee was a prolific local artist who passed away last year, and who bequeathed some of his art to CAMP Rehoboth with the request that proceeds from its sale be used for youth and arts programs. Lee’s art, which is held in numerous corporate and private collections, is built on the foundation of abstract expressionism. His gift provides an opportunity to remember Lee, add a piece of fine art to your collection, and support CAMP Rehoboth’s vital youth and arts programs at a time when they are needed more than ever.

The art is also posted and available for purchase on the CAMP Rehoboth website in the Online Gallery found under “Shop.” A reception honoring Lee will be held June 19 (4:30-6:30p.m.) in the CAMP Rehoboth Courtyard. A Celebration of Life with Pride is on display in the CAMP Rehoboth Gallery and Atrium through July 3. ▼

set designers, box office, ushers, maintenance…. Take a guess at the yards of fabric, or the gallons of paint, or the cost of tap shoes the next time you grouse about the cost of a ticket. As we creep toward normalcy, I’m planning the 2021-2022 CAMP Rehoboth Chorus season and giving thanks for the rainbow village that will make it happen.

Celebrate our interdependent village! ▼

Interpretations Opening July 6, CAMP Rehoboth features the mother-daughter duo of Aina Nergaard-Nammack—a colorist working with abstract forms—and Marta Nammack, a talented photographer. Each uses her medium to communicate in individual ways, using art to tell a story and show life and nature in an interesting light. Enjoy a courtyard reception on a Meterless Monday— July 12 (5-7 p.m.). ▼ CAMP Rehoboth highlights our community’s unique history and culture, and serves to further diversity, equity, and inclusion, by building unity and understanding. ▼ Exhibits at the CAMP Rehoboth Gallery may be viewed MondayFriday (10 a.m.-4 p.m.) or by appointment by emailing artshow@CAMPRehoboth.com.

Images this page (left) Elk Neck Evening by Lee Wayne Mills; (right, top to bottom) #723 Sitting Figure 2 by Aina Nergaard-Nammack, and Harlequin (detail)

by Lee Wayne Mills.

Letters 84 JUNE 18, 2021

arts+entertainment GALLERIES & MUSEUMS CAMP Rehoboth Gallery (37 Baltimore Avenue; 302-2275620; camprehoboth. com) featuring works by Lee Wayne Mills, Aina Nergaard-Nammack, and Marta Nammack. (See listing elsewhere in this column).

Gallery 50 (50 Wilmington Avenue; 302-227-2050; gallery50art.com) offers complete framing services and a fluid selection of works by the many talented artists they represent. Currently Come Alive by Sarah Pavlik, Peninsula Gallery.

PERFORMING ARTS CAMP Rehoboth 1st Fridays (Epworth UMC; 19285 Holland Glade Road) featuring singers from CAMP Rehoboth Chorus, July 2 (7p.m. and FREE)—also live-streamed and archived on the CAMP Rehoboth Facebook and YouTube pages. This month the theme is “I Hear America Singing”— songs about cities, states, or the country in general.

Cinema Art Theater (17701 Dartmouth Drive, Lewes; 302-313-4032; rehobothfilm. com) continues to follow all CDC guidelines, with reduced seating capacity for in-person viewing, and dozens of films available for streaming. See website for information.

Clear Space Theatre Company (20 Baltimore Avenue; 302-227-2270; ClearSpaceTheatre.org) cranks up their summer repertory season on June 29

with Mamma Mia!, followed

by Priscilla Queen of the Desert, and The Sound of Music. Christopher Peterson returns this season with Eyecons: The Thank You Tour. Check their website for details.

The Milton Theater (110 Union Street, Milton; 302-684-3038; miltontheatre. com) has reduced indoor seating for social distancing, as well as their outdoor Quayside stage with a remarkably diverse array of talent. Check their website for events and summer camps.

Possum Point Players (441 Old Laurel Road, Georgetown; 302-856-4560; possumpointplayers.org) presents All the Fixin’s—a special one-night country and blues fundraiser on their new outdoor stage, preceded by a delicious barbecue buffet, June 26.

60 Degree Maneuver: Indigo Shibori 3 by Margaret Black, Peninsula Gallery.

showing: Journey—A Pastel Exhibition by Jerry Strum— through June 29. Opening July 2: Recent Works by Kim Klabe.

Peninsula Gallery (520 E. Savannah Road, Lewes; 302-645-0551; peninsulagallery.com) presents Complex Cloth—four quilters’ approach to surface design.

Through July 25.

Rehoboth Art League (12 Dodds Lane, Henlopen Acres; 302-227-8408; rehobothartleague.org) has several new exhibits: Earth, Water, and Fire (works by Lisa Battle), 48th Annual Members’ Fine Craft Exhibit, and The Human Form—A Moment in Time (works by Jeff Kibler). Visit their website for upcoming exhibitions and class offerings. ▼ Doug is the Artistic Director for CAMP Rehoboth Chorus, Director of Music Ministries at Epworth UMC, and co-founder and Artistic Director emeritus of the Clear Space Theater Company. Contact Doug at dougyetter@gmail.com if you want to add your events to the calendar. Check out CAMP Arts on our website at camprehoboth.com for links to all the listed theatres, galleries and museums.

This program is supported, in part, by a grant from the Delaware Division of the Arts, a state agency, in partnership with the National Endowment for the Arts. The Division promotes Delaware arts events on www.

DelawareScene.com.

JUNE 18, 2021

85 Letters

arts+entertainment

by Terri Schlichenmeyer

BOOKED SOLID Rainbow Warrior: My Life in Color

by Gilbert Baker c.2019, Chicago Review Press $26.99/$35.99 Canada, 256 pages

At its most basic, it’s just a piece of cloth.

A nice poly-blend, perhaps, or a hank of nylon in a fade-resistant color.

There are holes in one end to fasten to a pole or rope, but it’s otherwise just a piece of cloth. Yet, people have died for it and, as in the new book Rainbow Warrior by Gilbert Baker, that flag could be the fabric of revolution.

Even as a small child, Gilbert Baker knew that he was gay.

He grew up in Kansas, a child who loved to draw, create, wear fancy dresses, and dream of being an artist. Alas, art wasn’t a career in his parents’ eyes so Baker, as a young man, lied about his gayness and enlisted in the army, where he quickly realized that he was in for years of abuse (at best) or Vietnam (at worst). He “lived in terror” before filing as a conscientious objector; the Army instead listed him as a medic and sent him to San Francisco.

It was the perfect accidental gift.

“When I got to San Francisco,” he said, “I knew I wasn’t ever going back to Kansas.”

Five days a week, Baker worked in an Army laboratory; the rest of the time was his to fall in love, explore his new city, and work on his sewing skills. Stitching became an obsession and by 1977, he was making costumes and banners for demonstrations. When he was asked to make something special for the city’s Gay Freedom Day Parade of 1978, he

Letters 86 JUNE 18, 2021

thought about the rainbow as a flag, and dived right in.

While that first flag was a big hit, Baker writes that the symbol didn’t take off quite as much as he’d hoped. Still, it was present in every “street activists” event he was part of, at every parade and protest. “One pair of scissors” and a mile of fabric could “change the whole dynamic,” he wrote later. It was “a pure act of rebellion.…”

Rainbow Warrior was compiled from several manuscripts that the late author, Gilbert Baker, left after his death in 2017, a fact that would have been helpful to have, early-on. You’ll be more forgiving of the overly-florid prose, knowing that.

Aside from that annoyance—one appearing throughout the book—readers may also notice a bit of pretentiousness, a lot of snarky fighting, endless drugs, and getting naked in Baker’s narrative, which is likewise forgivable because much of it takes place post-Stonewall, post-Summer-of-Love, preAIDS. And thus is the appeal here.

Baker was one of the more ferociously involved protesters, by his own account, and his anecdotes are priceless. He gives readers a good first-person look at early efforts for gay rights, and eye-opening, sometimes jaw-dropping, behind-the-scenes peeks at life as a young gay man during an uprising. It’s a lively, outrageous look at outrage, in an account that seems not to have held one thing back. That makes Rainbow Warrior readable and entertaining and, despite its overly ornate verbosity, a good look at revolution cut from a different cloth. ▼ Terri Schlichenmeyer has been reading since she was three years old and never goes anywhere without a book. Always Overbooked, she lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 15,000 books.

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87 Letters

HISTORICAL HEADLINERS

BY ANN APTAKER

HELLO GORGEOUS

Transgender Pioneer Christine Jorgensen

A

hhh…the 1950s, that golden time in America: the birth of rock ’n roll, strong labor unions, near full employment, the opening of Disneyland, the Sunday night TV ritual of the Ed Sullivan Show…and rigid sexual conformity. Same-sex relationships were illegal, deemed sick by society and even by the medical profession. In order to avoid harassment, jail, or worse, many lesbians and gay men hid so far back in their closets under so many layers of protection they might be mistaken for another rack of coats.

The taboo against gays and lesbians was even more oppressive against transgendered people. And medical science in America wasn’t dealing with it at all. But medical science in Europe was, at least to some extent. In the 1920s and ’30s, the groundbreaking work of Germany’s Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld led to the first two sex-reassignment surgeries ever performed: the first on Dora Richter (born Rudolph Richter), followed by surgery performed on Danish artist Lili Elbe (born Einar Magnus Andreas Wegener).

Bronx-born World War II veteran George William Jorgensen was determined to address his gender identity. Hearing of the advances made in Europe, Jorgensen travelled to Copenhagen in 1951, where he put himself under the care of Dr. Christian Hamburger. After a period of pre-surgery hormone therapies, Jorgensen was granted permission by the Danish government to undergo sex-reassignment surgery. At the end of six procedures, George Jorgensen emerged as Christine Jorgensen, the woman she had always believed herself to be. She took the name Christine, feminizing the male name Christian, in honor of her surgeon.

Christine’s return to New York in December 1952 as the first American to undergo sex reassignment signaled the start of her celebrity. She was met at the airport by a press corps whose attentions immediately elevated her to star status.

The press initially treated her kindly, if through an exotic lens.

The New York Daily News gave her arrival the full front page: “Ex-GI BECOMES BLONDE BEAUTY.” Hearst’s American Weekly paid her $20,000 for the exclusive rights to her story, and Newsday published her piece, “Her First Easter Bonnet,” on Easter weekend in 1953.

Though Christine initially wanted to lead a quiet life, she recognized that her celebrity afforded her a platform to advocate for transgender rights. She toured widely, and was welcomed on college campuses and other venues, where she spoke of her childhood feelings of being “a frail, blonde, introverted little boy,” and her growing awareness of her sense of herself as a woman.

Her star status also gave Christine a way to make a living.

She developed a nightclub act which was well received by the

Letters 88 JUNE 18, 2021

entertainment critics for her sharp wit, repartee, and her general showbiz pizzazz.

But the social conformity of the 1950s eventually triumphed over the tolerance and enthusiasm which initially greeted Christine. Her good press notices became more salacious, with various media venues asking her to pose in the nude. She declined.

The law, of course, was not on her side, either. Engaged twice, both engagements were broken when the marriages were denied by law. Though her doctors in Europe and America declared that Christine was “one hundred percent woman,” she was not permitted to marry since Christine’s birth certificate still identified her as male.

Wedded bliss was thus denied Christine and the men she loved and who loved her.

Compounding the injustice to Christine herself, John Knox, the second of her fiancés, to whom she became engaged in 1959, lost his job as a result of his relationship with Christine.

In 1967, with her nightclub appearances dwindling, Christine moved to Los Angeles, where she was still welcomed on the California lecture circuit. In 1968, Bantam published her autobiography, Christine Jorgensen: A Personal Autobiography. The book opened additional opportunities for public appearances to advocate for transgender rights, and she toured extensively in the 1970s and ’80s until her death in 1989 at age 63 from bladder and lung cancer.

Christine Jorgensen’s life was courageous, colorful, and meaningful. Her willingness to use her unsought celebrity to speak of her life and transition experience in order to advocate for others, attests to her courage. Her sophisticated nightclub act, her exuberance, and the fun she clearly had sharing a stage with the late drag luminary and film star Divine, attests to her colorful personality. In the May 29, 2014 issue of Time magazine, she was named one of the 25 Transgender People Who Influenced American Culture, a tribute to her determination to make her journey as America’s first recipient of sex reassignment surgery meaningful.

Her words in a 1967 interview sum up both the pain and joy of Christine’s early struggle and eventual triumph: “The answer to the problem must not lie in sleeping pills and suicides that look like accidents, or in jail sentences, but rather in life and the freedom to live it.”

Christine Jorgensen chose to live it. Brava! ▼ Ann Aptaker’s Cantor Gold crime/mystery series has won Lambda Literary and Goldie Awards. Her short stories appear in numerous publications and anthologies.

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89 Letters

View Point

BY RICHARD J. ROSENDALL

Cutting Blue Out of the Rainbow

B

arring queer cops from Pride is a terrible mistake.

The decision by Heritage of Pride in New York City to bar uniformed police from marching in their parade reminds us that some activists do not want to end authoritarianism so much as take it over.

The HOP executive board overrode its membership in banning the Gay Officers Action League (GOAL) from marching. In doing so, the board copied the Ancient Order of Hibernians, which years ago banned the same group from marching in its St. Patrick’s Day parade. What sense does it make to adopt the methods of those who have excluded us? Of course, HOP has the same right as the Hibernians to enforce their expressive purpose by deciding who can march with them. I simply think HOP’s decision is wrong.

If you have seen crowd reactions to LGBTQ cops marching in past Pride parades, you know how popular they are. Pride committees who ban groups like GOAL, or “politely decline their application,” as someone on Facebook put it, do not care that in doing so they ignore the views of the majority. Are they a board or a politburo?

This “People’s Democracy” paternalism dishonors generations of LGBTQ activists who fought for police accountability and for improved relations. It goes against the very spirit of Stonewall, in which our people rejected victimhood rather than embracing it. We should be building better bridges, not burning them.

To repair something, we must first understand it, which we can hardly do by treating it as monolithic and unchangeable. In my hometown of Washington, DC, I have worked in coalitions to win a number of policing reforms over the years. No, we did not create instant perfection, but we moved things forward. Last summer I helped recruit members for the new DC Police Reform Commission. Its report, issued in April, dramatically re-envisions public Letters 90 JUNE 18, 2021

safety. Shouldn’t we examine such work before dismissing it?

Reform efforts are not helped by barring queer cops from Pride. They are our friends and are widely popular.

Queer DC residents have been happy when officers from the Metropolitan Police Department’s LGBT Liaison Unit responded to an incident. No, of course it’s not enough. The struggle continues.

I took part in a video conference recently about removing armed police from public schools. A lot of thoughtful, dedicated people are doing good work.

It goes against the very spirit of Stonewall, in which our people rejected victimhood rather than embracing it. We should be building better bridges, not burning them.

We are part of a multi-generational struggle. If the efforts of those who preceded you do not deserve respect, why should yours? To respect only those who agree with you is no respect at all.

Assertions of triggering can themselves be a form of aggression. If an officer you’ve excluded claims that your doing so has triggered him, is there an ombudsman to whom the case can be referred? Is there a Hierarchy of Triggers? There is an ancient proverb: “Whom the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.”

Police brutality is real; but that does not justify barring entire parts of our community, any more than a survivor of sexual assault should be able to bar everyone of the same sex

as their assailant. Our diversity brings challenges. We must meet them, not flee from them.

Some among us are more at risk, more targeted for abuse and arrest.

They are more traumatized and need greater help. But we should help them heal, not build an altar to their brokenness. We do not help by exploiting their pain or misdirecting our anger. We do not help by stigmatizing and excluding LGBTQ officers. Inflicting more wounds is not the path to healing.

Polls show that most Black people don’t want to abolish the police, they simply want more responsive and respectful police. The same is true for queer folk. There is still violent crime, and there are violent criminals. Simply calling for abolishing police is too facile. There is a growing recognition that every problem does not require an armed officer. Crafting appropriate reforms takes faithful collaboration. We cannot wave a magic wand.

Having survived COVID-19 with innovations like telecommuting, virtual cocktails, and dining in the parking lane, why not devise new ways to exercise our own freedom of association in a creative response to those who would circumscribe our diversity to impose their preference?

The social distancing required by the pandemic exacerbated an existing problem fueled by technology. The more we retreat into separate virtual spaces, the more our shared reality slips and we become vulnerable to predation by sociopaths and demagogues. We need to get out more. As friendships do not live by Zoom alone, social problems cannot be resolved solely via send key. Risky as it is, we must breathe the same air. Let’s get fully vaccinated and reconnect. ▼ Richard J. Rosendall is a writer and activist at rrosendall@me.com.

JUNE 18, 2021

91 Letters

Deep Inside Hollywood

BY ROMEO SAN VICENTE

Deadpool 3 Going Bi? They’re making Deadpool 3, which really comes as no surprise, because if Marvel knows anything, it’s how to keep you craving more Marvel. But this time out might surprise non-queer audiences. According to sources close to the project, lead Ryan Reynolds wants Deadpool’s sexuality to unfold and has apparently made explicit requests to make the anti-hero bisexual. Now, according to comic

book canon, this is already approximately in the ballpark of how Deadpool’s sexuality works—as early as 2013 the wildly irreverent superhuman was described as pansexual. And we’re (potentially) thrilled that any lead Marvel character would get a chance to step outside the boundaries of strict heterosexuality when so far, all we’ve gotten is the beginnings of a same-sex relationship (in Deadpool

Tig Notaro Is Now a Cartoon She wrote and starred in the sitcom One Mississippi. She’s about to be streaming in Zack Snyder’s Netflix film, Army of the Dead.

She visited Star Trek: Discovery. She’s also co-directing a feature film, Am I OK?, that will star Dakota Johnson. But before all that, Tig Notaro was a stand-up comic. And now she’s aiming for history there, too, by becoming the first comedian to have a fully animated hour of stand-up. The as-yet-untitled special will air on HBO this summer, with Ellen DeGeneres serving as a producer. We can’t think of a better person to jump start this potential trend, because Notaro’s low-key demeanor seems like the perfect starting point to animate an even more deadpan version of her stage presence. As much as we plan to be finally outside this summer, we’ll make an exception for an indoor hour of Tig. ▼

2) between the supporting characters Negasonic Teenage Warhead and Yukio.

But we’d be even more thrilled if we knew some queer writers were on board, people who know how to make the subject come alive in an authentic way and won’t treat the subject as just another wacky Deadpool throwaway gag. Here’s hoping. ▼

Heartstopper Gives Gay Teens a Romance of Their Own If you were a fan of Love, Victor, get ready for Heartstopper. Based on a series of YA graphic novels by Alice Oseman, the upcoming Netflix series explores high school life for two gay boys who start as friends and grow to become more. Newcomer Joe Locke has been cast alongside Kit Connor (Rocketman, His Dark Materials) as the two boys: one quiet and gentle, one more open and high-strung. Though they have a supportive community helping them accept their queerness, they still must navigate school, friends, and their own reluctance to upset a good friendship with the risks of romance. The series is currently filming in the UK throughout the summer and will involve eight 30-minute episodes that will eventually drop on Netflix. When that drop takes place is anyone’s guess, so in the meantime go get those graphic novels! ▼

Almodovar and Penelope Cruz Reteam for Parallel Mothers With his impeccably glamorous short film The Human Voice (starring the equally impeccable Tilda Swinton) finally streaming on HBO Max, Academy Award-winning Spanish director Pedro Almodovar is teaming up with one of his longtime muses, Penelope Cruz, for his next film, Parallel Mothers. It’s another exploration of motherhood from the queer man who brought the world All About My Mother, Letters 92 JUNE 18, 2021

this one about women who give birth on the same day and what happens after that. Shooting right now, headliner Cruz is joined by longtime Almodovar collaborators like Rossy de Palma and Julieta Serrano (both were in Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown) as well as Israel Elejalde and transgender actor Daniela Santiago from the sensational Spanish miniseries Veneno. We’ve heard that

Almodovar also has his eyes on Anya Taylor-Joy and wants to add her to the cast, but there’s no word on what she thinks of this. We’ll just live in excited anticipation until Sony Pictures Classics brings the finished product to big screens. ▼ Romeo San Vicente is lining up pool party invitations and waterproofing his vaccination card.

JUNE 18, 2021

93 Letters

Visiting View Guest Column

BY ED CASTELLI

Tree Frogs and Afghan Shawls

I

keep a gratitude journal. Every time I use it, I write five things I’m thankful for in rapid succession. For extra credit, I challenge myself to never repeat.

When I started, I pretty quickly noted the big ones: husband, health, home.

But as time goes on, I find I’m thankful for so many things. Some large, some small. Got Our Taxes Done. Having a Snowblower. Even mundane things that bring me joy. Cinnamon Toast.

On a bad day, this journal lifts me up.

It’s an exercise in mindfulness and has helped me see all the things that make life great.

The other day I wrote something that sparked warm memories. Living the Life I Always Wanted to Live. I thought back to my childhood and how I wanted my adult life to be. A rewarding, fun life, full of love and acceptance. This, in turn, brought to mind my dad’s collection of family photos. Two in particular.

My dad loved taking pictures. He knew just when to click the shutter. He’d catch my mom in a loving sideways glance. Or my grandma’s impish smile, capturing what I’m sure was a quirky inner monologue.

We had family slide nights on every cold weather holiday. Mom, my older siblings, and I warmed ourselves in front of a hot fire while my dad narrated.

Over the hum of the projector, we’d roar laughing at out-of-date fashions or some embarrassing teenage gaffe. Or we’d pause quietly for a lost loved one. It was family time at its best. And well after bedtime we’d relentlessly plead for just one more.

Long before I could label my desire to live as an out and proud gay man, I cherished the two photos you see here because they represented the life I hoped I’d live someday. They were taken at a family barbeque before I was born.

I never met these men. But I yearned to see their pictures at every showing.

You see, most of our pictures were some variation of man plus woman, or their offspring. But these men were alone in the frames of my choosing. I

Letters 94 JUNE 18, 2021

Long before I could label my desire to live as an out and proud gay man, I cherished the two photos you see here because they represented the life I hoped I’d live someday.

could imagine them to be whatever I wanted them to be. And I made them into kindred spirits.

My memories are blurred, but I seem to recall the mention of “never married” for at least one of them. Ding, ding. One entered the priesthood. Did I detect an extra lilt in that spatula hand? Was the quilt a shawl? Is that hip a bit swished?

And the pocket smokes, how glamorous!

I would drink these slides in as fast as I could, studying their every detail. I couldn’t ask Dad to pause as that would call attention to my vested interest.

Three seconds each, tops. They’d flash on the screen and be gone until the next holiday. But oh, what joy they brought me. They made me not alone. I knew through these pictures there were others out there, even if only in my mind.

Today I’m left to wonder what became of my fictitious sisters. But I know what became of me. I eventually realized being gay is what made me different. I navigated coming out relatively unscathed. I married the most wonderful husband. And I now live surrounded by great friends and fun barbeques of my own making.

Life truly goes full circle. Pre-COVID, we hosted an evening barbeque on our deck near Bethany Beach. We live near a runoff pond and there were tree frogs croaking all around us. One was nearby, clinging to a window. As we watched, he leaped over us toward the water. Six grown men let out the deepest, most guttural, nelly screams. And then we laughed like grade-school girls.

It was chilly that late spring night and I had made a shawl out of an afghan. Yes indeed, I’m living the life I wanted to live.

And for that I’m grateful. ▼ Ed and his husband, Jerry, split their time between homes near Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and Bethany Beach. Ed builds websites to pay the bills but loves to cook, garden, hike, and dote on their dog, Atticus.

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95 Letters

SCENES FROM REHOBOTH BEACH

1

2

3 (Continued from page 77) THIS PAGE: 1) at Blue Coast Kim Schuler, Lisa Lekawa, Susan Garson, Shera Jessee, Teri Armstrong, Jeannette Beaulieu, Holly Klein, Casey Currie, Beth Petitte; 2) at The Pines Cathy Forthuber, Diane Taylor, Karen Faber, Lisa Balestrini Faber; 3) at Ladies HH 251 Laura Reitman, Kelly Sabol, Dawn Dupre, Megan Dupre-Keating, Maureen Tobin, Debora Brooke, Jane St. Clair; 4) at Aqua Tyler Prete, Marty Rendon, Jeff Brydzinski.

4 Letters 96 JUNE 18, 2021

OPPOSITE PAGE: 5) at Aqua Russ Coop, Matthew Mueller, Victor Camacho, Will Delaney, David Lasher, Larry Pennington; 6) at The Pond opening Davey Keitch, Pete Borsari; 7) at The Pines Dueling Pianos Matthew Kenworthy, John Flynn; 8) at The Pond Joel Leidy, Nancy Leidy, Cab Burns, Tom Bell; 9) at Aqua Jorge Mumer, Ricardo Benavides, Ryan Williams. ▼

Summer Unmasked

5

6

8

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9 JUNE 18, 2021

97 Letters

Celebrity Interview

Jamal Sims F

BY MICHAEL COOK

LOVES TO SEE THE UNDERDOG SHINE

rom working with everyone from Madonna and Jennifer Lopez and the legendary Michael Jackson himself—to the Las Vegas stage with RuPaul’s Drag Race LIVE!—choreographer (and newly minted director) Jamal Sims is pushing the artists he works with to heights that they may not even have known they were capable of. His directorial debut film, When the Beat Drops, is a deep dive into the dance style known as “bucking,” with Sims giving those artists the ability to tell their own stories.

I sat down with this consistently busy and multi-faceted performer to discuss his work with the ladies of Drag Race, how he brings out the best in the artists he works with.

Michael Cook: What is the one thing that you think you have missed the most during the past year?

Jamal Sims: The movies! I just want to sit in a movie theater with some popcorn.

MC: The film, When the Beat Drops, is absolutely incredible. Having such a deep passion for dancing and, in this case, the style of ‘bucking,’ it truly reflects in the work as a whole. Can you explain the origin of the dance form?

JS: Thank you. I love it and it is something that I have wanted to do for so long.

Back in the 70s, there was a woman by the name of Shirley Milton who was on the Jackson State University drill team.

In those days, the drill team would toss batons; that was the style then. She put down the baton and started “bucking.”

That is where it originated. From there, the other drill teams started to catch on to this particular style of dance. Then in the 80s, the boys started to do it. That is where it all came from. The boys would do it in the underground clubs in the South, but it all came from the drill team.

MC: So much like voguing, this came from the African American community Letters 98 JUNE 18, 2021

representing it, people are going to start making assumptions that these people are making it up and they’re not. I really wanted to make sure that the creators are credited properly.

MC: We have seen you for many seasons on RuPaul’s Drag Race LIVE! working with the queens on choreography, but it is also evident that you love the art and performance of drag itself. Does it feel like just a natural fit to do it?

and is “borrowed,” and becomes part of global popular culture. Madonna did, though, pay homage to the originators of the dance by including the dancers in her video and tour at that time.

JS: That is absolutely right. That is actually why I did it. I didn’t want somebody to come and make it commercial and do a pop song about it and suddenly it’s “their dance.”

Actually, when I originally went to talk to the boys, they didn’t want to do the documentary. They were afraid that I was going to make fun of them or make some sort of mockery of what they were doing. I let them know that I wanted to have them tell their story before “they” tell it for you.

I let them know that they should tell their story; that is what actually led them to do the documentary.

MC: Artists like you and Big Freedia, for example, are taking your own culture and celebrating the facets of it, rather than letting someone come in and do that for you. Do you think that is very crucial right now?

JS: Yes! Even as far as TikTok or these smaller dances, people are going viral from things borrowed from us. We have to always tell people where it came from and show them, “this is us.” If we are not

JS: Yeah, it is. I have always been for the underdog and wanted to help them shine.

Drag Race, that is what it does for me.

There are some queens who are on the show that people think would not be able to do what they can do, and what they are capable of. I really look forward to finding that raw talent, and also cultivating someone who is maybe not as polished, and people are then, like, “Wow, I didn’t know she could do that!”

MC: When you see artists working with choreographers, much of that relationship is based on the level of trust the performer and the choreographer have developed. When you work with an art-

ist, can it sometimes be difficult to get through that barrier where they are shy, insecure, or don’t trust easily, especially when you see something in them that you are trying very hard to bring out?

JS: Yes. You know, a lot of times people are put in these positions that they are not necessarily ready for. We are in a manufactured world where someone is pretty, and they will give them a song and

almost throw them to the wolves. For me, it is, “what do you do well, what are you interested in?” My first couple of rehearsals are actually just talking. Let’s figure out what you are passionate about, what you like, are you a fashion person, let’s play to your strengths; that is usually what I like to do. I play to what people think that they do well. Even if they don’t really do them well, if they think that they do, we are ahead of the game at that point.

protection.” If you don’t get a job or a certain artist, or if I wanted to choreograph a certain movie and it went to someone else, he would say that “there is a reason you’re not there. You have to trust that that project wasn’t for you.”

Nine times out of 10, it would come out and I would be like, “whew, I’m so glad I didn’t do that one.”

MC: Everything in the life of Jamal Sims is extremely fast; how do you just completely and totally exhale?

When the Beat Drops is available on Wow Presents PLUS.

JS: I love the beach, I love the water. I can go to a beach and unplug and leave my phone. That’s usually the best thing for me. Around some warm water, I love it.

MC: Who has given you the best advice in your career that you have taken with you?

JS: It was probably my dad. He would always say that “rejection is God’s

Follow Jamal Sims on Instagram: instagram.com/jamizzi/. ▼ Michael Cook has been a part-time resident of Rehoboth Beach for over a decade. He is currently a contributor to Instinct Magazine, World of Wonder’s WOW Report, and South Florida Gay News. Michael can be found on Instagram: instagram.com/cookie74/?hl=en

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302 313-4619

JUNE 18, 2021

99 Letters

Featured Interview

BY LAWRENCE FERBER

Deaf Is Beautiful

I

t’s hard enough finding a role model and road map for life as a marginalized individual. Chella Man already knows this, of course. The artist, actor, model, and activist is deaf, genderqueer, Jewish, half-Chinese, and pansexual.

Yet the Brooklyn-based 22-year-old, best known for his art-design collaborations with fashion brand Opening Ceremony, and for playing mute superhero Jericho in the DC Universe TV series Titans in 2019, will ensure that new generations can access his inspiring, multi-layered life experience widely this Pride season through Continuum.

The book is a revealing autobiography from Penguin Random House’s YA-geared Pocket Change Collection. Authored by LGBTQ+ and BIPOC activists, other releases include Leo Baker’s Skate for Your Life, and Alok Vaid-Menon’s Beyond the Gender Binary.

“I got to a point in my life when I realized there have been so many checkpoints, so I wanted to take a moment, reflect, and unpack what I’ve been through,” says Chella, who wore cochlear implants, a small electronic device placed in the ears that partially restores hearing, during our recent interview on Zoom.

Chella wrote the book while quarantining at his central Pennsylvania family home during the pandemic with artist and photographer girlfriend MaryV Benoit.

During this time, the whole family contracted COVID-19 and recovered, although Chella says, “my dad got very sick and it was very scary.”

Continuum sees Chella dive right into his childhood as “Rachel.” “I don’t feel like it’s a deadname,” he says. “I once did, because I internalized other trans individuals’ ideas of what their names meant to them, but I’m OK sitting with and being close to the name I was given at birth. If you look at my name now, I actually kept some of it. I took Rachel, cut off the ‘ra’ and added the little ‘la’ and here I am: Chella. And because I always still felt connected to what society deems feminine and femininity, I identify as genderqueer and felt I wanted to keep some of that with me.”

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In Continuum, Chella recounts going deaf as a child and early gender identity epiphanies, the trauma puberty wreaked in middle school, and accessing first images of LGBTQs, including those of gay men kissing in public and lesbians holding each other. Contributing to the vividness of these memories was the fact Chella kept a diary over the years from which he could cull and repurpose entries. He said writing the book in the same family home he experienced the intense isolation and trauma of his youth was a “blessing and a curse.”

Genderqueer artist-author Chella Man wrote his book, Continuum, during the pandemic.

“It connected me to memories I wouldn’t have otherwise, but at the same time it was very heavy because I felt everything so deeply,” he recalls. Referencing the diary entries helped him formulate a fluid story, despite having lived a life that he says has been “extremely non-linear.”

“How do you explain systemic oppression to a child? I thought that was interesting,” Chella says, “and it encouraged me to look back on things I initially thought were complex to simplify them, and I realized they aren’t so complex after all. The world just makes us believe they are.”

Later passages in the book cover his move to New York to attend Parsons School of Design (he was admitted to its

early acceptance program while still a high school junior), transitioning via top surgery and testosterone—a process he shared at the time via social media and columns for LGBTQ+ digital news platform them—and his relationship with MaryV, whom he says was encouraging throughout the process.

Since completing Continuum, which Chella Man also illustrated, he has served as an executive producer on Topic’s documentary series, Trans in Trumpland, and collaborated with NY genderless streetwear brand Private Policy on a line of ear jewelry that celebrates “the beauty of being deaf.” He also directed its video promo, which is set underwater and features deaf BIPOC models (50 percent of pre-order profits go to Deaf Queer Resource Center).

“That was a dream come true, because since I was a kid I imagined that vision of, ‘How can I let people know how...beautiful it is to be deaf?’” he says.

“I was surrounded by people who weren’t disabled and didn’t understand, and I wanted to amplify that and what’s more beautiful than being able to communicate underwater?”

Chella is reticent to discuss other upcoming projects, barring a potential zine. He’s also hoping to embark on a book-reading tour at schools, bringing visibility and inspiration to any baby Chellas out there.

“I have actually, this past year, been most privileged to mentor an 11-year-old who is deaf, genderqueer, Jewish, and Chinese!” he says. Every so often, they meet on FaceTime, where Chella mentors the child. “I never thought I’d meet someone like that,” he says. ▼ NY-raised entertainment and travel journalist Lawrence Ferber has contributed to publications including Entertainment Weekly, New York Magazine, National Geographic Traveler, The Advocate, NewNowNext, the NY Post and TripSavvy. He also co-wrote/cocreated the 2010 gay romcom BearCity and authored its 2013 novelization.

JUNE 18, 2021

101 Letters

WE REMEMBER

Cheryl Marie Ellis

C

heryl Marie Ellis (nee Cawley) passed peacefully into eternal happiness on May 7, 2021, surrounded by her loving wife, son, and other family members at her home in Rehoboth Beach. Born April 27, 1964, and raised in Secane, Pennsylvania by her father, Richard Cawley, and mother, Florence Cawley, she spent many childhood days playing with and learning from her four older siblings—sisters Ann Marie and Janie, and brothers Richard and William.

Always one who loved the sun, she spent summers growing up in Ocean City, New Jersey. Working on the boardwalk and playing in the sand, she developed into the adventurous soul that would define her in later years. A 1982 Ridley High School graduate, Cheryl married John Ellis a few years later and had a son, John Ellis, III. The benevolent motherly care she displayed with her son would transcend to her career as well.

A life-long nurse, Cheryl worked at many hospitals and long-term care facilities. As skilled as she was caring, she

brought comfort to countless people and families over her 30+ years in the field.

In later years she found her partner of 22 years and futurewife, Charlotte Williams. Returning to the sun and sand, she spent some of the best years of her life living with Charlotte in Rehoboth Beach and enjoying all the splendors the beach has to offer.

More than anything, Cheryl was a woman who enjoyed being surrounded by her family, friends, and other loved ones.

She was a lover of good food, Happy Hours, Jeep rides on the beach, and playing with her two grandsons, Johnny and Tommy.

Predeceased by her father and mother, Cheryl is survived by her wife, Charlotte; son, John, his wife, Patricia, and their children, Johnny and Tommy; four siblings; and countless nieces, nephews, and their children.

For Cheryl, no adventure was too large and no moment was too small. She will be missed by many. ▼

WE HELP FAMILIES:  Shelter assets from long term care costs

 Apply for Medicaid & VA long term care benefits  Create Wills and Powers of Attorney  Utilize Trusts for probate avoidance  Preserve public benefits for persons with special needs  Administer their loved ones’ estates

Planning today to protect your family’s tomorrow.

Letters 102 JUNE 18, 2021

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CALL TRICIA MASSELLA AT 302-227-5620 or email ads@camprehoboth.com for more information!

JUNE 18, 2021

103 Letters

The REAL DIRT

BY ERIC W. WAHL

Permaculture: A Way to Live

Y

ou may have heard the term “permaculture” being flung around lately in the gardening/ landscaping community. It’s a practice taking root across America, from the rural countryside to urban farms. It comes from the phrase “permanent agriculture,” which is based on sustaining the farm in a permanent, ecological process that produces food for both people and animals indefinitely.

Permaculture, as with many ecological principles, can be traced back to Indigenous peoples and their practice of collaborating and living with nature. The Iroquois Nation and other Indigenous peoples had the Seventh Generation Rule which stated that today’s decisions can impact the next seven generations. This can help us define sustainability to mean meeting the needs of the present without compromising the ability of future generations to meet their own needs.

Permanent agriculture first entered the modern age in the first half of the 20th century, with farmers starting to use trees and shrubs that provided fruit and nuts as a food crop for both people and animals. They also started to plant other crops among the trees and shrubs, creating an early form of ecological planting system.

As time went on, this new type of “natural farming” began to spread.

The term “permaculture” entered the scene in the 1960s in academia and was defined as a philosophy of working with, rather than against, nature. By the 1980s the term expanded its definition and evolved into “sustainable human habitats,” or “holistic gardening.”

Today, we can define permaculture as a series of principles designed to protect the earth and us. It includes patterns in the landscape that can provide maximum benefit while minimizing waste, labor, and energy.

These patterns make the landscape easier to maintain and harvest than a Letters 104 JUNE 18, 2021

typical garden or farmstead. In fact, there are a couple of small farms that use this method in the region. With some luck, I will be designing a project soon as a permaculture homestead.

Today, we can define permaculture as a series of principles designed to protect the earth and us. It includes patterns in the landscape that can provide maximum benefit while minimizing waste, labor, and energy.

How? If you have read my articles from early on, you will know that one of the most important items in designing a landscape is site inventory and analysis, or “reading your landscape,” as I call it.

After taking inventory and reviewing the site, I will create an existing conditions plan upon which the conceptual design will start to take shape. I will also take into account the clients’ requirements and vision for the property. A larger property may include numerous types of food producing plants, both agricultural varieties and native plants. However, you may want to consider a forest food patch for smaller spaces.

A forest food patch resembles the layers of a typical forest: canopy, understory, shrub layer, and ground plane. For example, plant some nutbearing trees as part of the canopy layer, like hickories or oaks. (Yes, acorns are edible and some even give chestnuts a run for their money.)

Persimmon or pawpaw can be included in the understory layer. Definitely try lowbush blueberry as part of the shrub layer. Raspberries and blackberries are good in this location too. For the ground plane, edible herbaceous plants can fill in the space; even lettuces can be used here and they grow quickly from seed.

It may take some trial and error to get your permaculture established as certain plants play better with some species than others. However, proper planning and research should help alleviate most issues. A master plan always helps to organize and prioritize the garden.

I hope this piqued your interest in permaculture. There is a lot of information available on the subject in books and online, as well as online classes.

A final thought, consider what actions you take now and how they will impact the seventh generation from now. Maybe we all should start living by this prescient rule and live with nature, especially since our food, water, and habitat all reside within it.

Stay safe, and let’s garden together. ▼ Eric W. Wahl is a landscape architect at Pennoni Associates, and the president of the Delaware Native Plant Society.

JUNE 18, 2021

105 Letters

saved souls 28-02_Layout 1 3/30/2018 2:15 PM Page 1

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Letters 106 JUNE 18, 2021

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107 Letters

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www.meetup.com/Gay-Women-Rehoboth Learn about women’s activities, dances, discussion groups and singles events in the area.

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Send your check for $40 to CAMP Rehoboth, 37 Baltimore Ave., Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971. If you prefer to use your Visa, MasterCard or American Express call 302-227-5620.

thank you to all the CAMP Rehoboth Community Center volunteers for the period: April 30-June 4, 2021

ARTS TEAM Edward Alban Kerry Hallett Jane Knaus Lois Powell Leslie Sinclair Tiffany Smith Patricia Stiles Debbie Woods CAMP COMMUNITY CENTER Ann Evans Natalie Moss Larry Rosen Sandra Skidmore Alan Spiegelman CAMP MAINTENANCE Eric Korpon CAMPCIERGES Mary Anne Bonafair Barbara Breault Jeff Buhrman David Carder Max Dick Jim Mease Kim Nelson Pat Powell Patricia Stiles Russell Stiles Matt Swalga CAMPSHOTS PHOTO VOLUNTEERS Tony Burns Dave Camorali Fay Jacobs Laura Reitman

CHORUS LEADERSHIP COMMITTEE Neil Frock Bill Fuchs Dianna Johnston Judy Olsen Kim Schilpp Dave Scuccimarra Sandra Skidmore CROP EVENT— SPRING FOOD COLLECTIONS 5/21 Chris Beagle Barbara Breault Wesley Combs Lewis Dawley Karen DeSantis Richard Dietz David Garrett Nancy Hewish Karen Laitman Mary Medlock Kim Nelson Susan Russell Kim Schilpp Leslie Sinclair Debbie Woods EBAY VOLUNTEER Tony Mazzarella FIRST FRIDAYS WITH THE CAMP REHOBOTH CHORUS Barry Bugg Dan Foskey Sally Gilles Bo Gordy-Stith Vicki Gordy-Stith

Dave Minges Andrea Monetti Larry Rosen David Scuccimarra Tracey Seabolt Sandra Skidmore Kathleen Taylor Doug Yetter GRANTS COMMITTEE Leslie Calman Kate Cauley Lois Powell John Roane Leslie Sinclair HANDMADE MARKET Barbara Breault Sue Brown Richard Dietz Mark Eubanks Mollyne Honor Dean Kasow Jill Masterman Jim Mease Doug Sellers LETTERS ARCHIVIST Ronald Dempsey LETTERS DISTRIBUTION TEAM Dean Kasow Mary Ellen Mannion Kim Schlipp LETTERS MAILING TEAM Andy Brangenberg David Carder David Hagelin

Nancy Hewish Grant Kingswell Vickie Martina Stephen Palmer Fran Sneider Russell Stiles Linda Yingst MEMBERSHIP COMMITTEE Jane Blue Ann Evans Rich Grote Pat Newcomb Glen Pruitt Debbie Woods RAINBOW THUMB CLUB Dale Adams Chris Bowers Carol Brice Linda DeFeo Karen DeSantis Patricia DiModugno Monica Fleischman Sparky Jones Chip Logan Carolyn Ortwein Samantha Pietryak Diane Scobey Evie Simmons Barb Thompson Margaret Tobin Elva Weininger

TRANSCENDING GENDER ART TOURS Patricia Stiles Russell Stiles Debbie Woods VOLUNTEER DEVELOPMENT COMMITTEE Jeffrey Buhrman Pat Catanzariti Robert Fleming Karen Laitman Jim Mease Rina Pellegrini Leslie Sinclair John Michael Sophos Angie Strano Debbie Woods

SOCIAL MEDIA Lyndon Johnson

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109 Letters

AD INDEX 1776 Steakhouse....................................................... 49 A Celebration of Life with Pride................................. 48 AG Renovations.......................................................... 81 Allen Jarmon, Realtor................................................. 81 Aqua Bar & Grill.......................................................... 29 Bayberry Flowers....................................................... 81 Beebe Healthcare...................................................... 62 Beebe Healthcare Career Opportunities................... 79 Brandywine Urology Consultants........................... 7, 73 BSD............................................................................. 78 Café Azafran............................................................... 63 CAMP Rehoboth Letters Subscription...................... 109 Caroline Huff, Artist.................................................... 23 Cat & Mouse Publishing............................................. 81 Chesapeake & Maine................................................. 61 Chris Beagle, Realtor................................................. 51 Christopher Peterson....................................................9 Clear Space Theatre................................................... 41 Coho’s Market & Grill.................................................. 33 Country Lawn Care................................................... 110 County Bank............................................................... 63 Debbie Reed Team..................................................... 23 Delaware Community Foundation........................... 105 Delaware Hospice.................................................... 103 Delaware Humane Association ................................. 82 Delaware Pride........................................................... 93 Donna Whiteside, Realtor.......................................... 18 Duck Donuts............................................................... 89 Elegant Slumming...................................................... 15 Fifth Avenue Jewelers................................................ 35 Freddies Beach Bar & Restaurant.............................. 67

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Gay Women’s Meet Up............................................. 108 General Dentistry .................................................... 106 Go Fish Go Brit .......................................................... 15 God’s Greyts Senior Greyhounds............................. 108 Goolee’s Grille............................................................ 67 Gregg Busch, First Savings Mortgage........................ 15 Harbour Waterfront Dining......................................... 95 Harvey Grider, Accent On Travel 7-night Cruise........ 89 Hugh Fuller, Realtor.................................................... 54 Immanuel Shelter....................................................... 51 Indigo Indian Cuisine................................................. 59 Jack Lingo, Real Estate.............................................. 91 Jenn Harpel, Morgan Stanley..................................... 11 Jolly Trolley.............................................................. 106 Just In Thyme Restaurant........................................... 11 Lana Warfield, Realtor................................................ 53 Lee Ann Wilkinson Group, Realtors............................ 21 Lori’s Café.................................................................. 82 Loves Liquors............................................................. 33 Membership Matters.................................................. 35 MERR Institute............................................................ 51 Midway Fitness & Racquetball................................. 111 Milton Theatre...................................................... 68, 69 Olivia Travel................................................................ 19 PFLAG....................................................................... 103 Port 251..................................................................... 45 Purple Parrot.............................................................. 55 PWW Law.................................................................. 102 Randall-Douglas......................................................... 23 Randy Mason/Shirley Kalvinsky, Realtors.................. 95 Rehoboth Art League................................................. 11

Rehoboth Beach Bears............................................... 87 Rehoboth Beach Dental............................................. 35 Rehoboth Beach Museum.......................................... 39 Rehoboth Guest House.............................................. 59 Rehoboth Massage & Alignment................................ 95 Riess Livaudais, Realtor............................................. 59 Rigby’s - John Black................................................... 71 Ron Whitesell, Realtor................................................ 89 Saved Souls Animal Rescue..................................... 106 Sea Barre Fitness Pride Rides.................................... 99 Sea Bova Associates, Realtors................................. 112 Springpoint Choice................................................... 107 State Farm - George Bunting..................................... 49 State Farm - Jeanine O’Donnell/Eric Blondin............. 27 Stoli - Harvey Milk - 2021 Pride Bottle....................... 13 Sun Festival................................................................ 17 Sussex Family YMCA................................................ 106 The Lawson Firm........................................................ 39 The Lodge at Truitt Homestead.................................. 39 The Pines.................................................................... 47 Time to Heal Counseling & Consulting...................... 83 Troy Roberts, Realtor.................................................. 63 True Blue Jazz............................................................ 42 Unfinished Business................................................... 49 Village Volunteers...................................................... 86 Volunteer Appreciation............................................ 101 Volunteer Opportunities........................................... 109 Volunteer Thank You................................................ 109 Where 2 Next Travel................................................... 25 Windsor’s Flowers...................................................... 59

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WHITE TAIL LANE - Millsboro. You’ll find this 2002 3BR/2.5BA Cape Cod-style home down a long, private gravel lane. The 2-story home is approx. 2,100 sq. ft. on 4.1 acres. Attached 2-car garage & an enormous 30’x40’ 2-story pole barn w/lean-to for your boat or other “toys.” Formal LV w/gas FP. Big kitchen w/dining area. Family room is next to the kitchen, so it could be a formal dining room. Main bedroom & bath are on the 1st floor. Two big BRs upstairs. So much attic storage space. No HOA. $599,000 (183706)

HERON BAY - Lewes. 2008 3BR/2BA 1,456sf home has so many upgrades. Newer roof, HAVC, laminate flooring, 12’x14’ VinylTech porch & more. Bonus: Finished attic. ½ acre. $399,900 (NEW)

BAYVILLE SHORES - Selbyville. This 2,230sf townhouse features views of the lake from the 1st & 2nd floors. It is steps away from the community pool & clubhouse. And the Fenwick Island State Park beaches are only 5 miles away! The 2002-built condo has a 1st-floor main bedroom suite, with walk-in closet, separate tub & shower, plus an 11’x16’ sunroom w/water views. 2nd BR/BA are on this level, too. Upstairs living room w/gas FP also has sunroom w/lake views.

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SHIPBUILDERS VILLAGE Milton. Located 1 mile from the historic downtown area.

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LOCHWOOD - Lewes. New Construction - TBB. The Ethan is a 3BR/2BA 1,605 sq. ft. home.

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CAMELOT MEADOWS Rehoboth. 2016 2BR/2BA home has an addition w/ wood stove & mini-split HVAC. 3.5 miles to beach.

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