FINDING MY STRENGTH BY TRYSTAN HENDERSON Recipient of the Charlotte Tucker Scholarship
My name is Trystan, and I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes
on March 26, 2012. I had been sick for a while. My mom stayed up many nights with worry, not being able to sleep. She knew something was wrong, but nobody had any idea how serious my condition actually was. I had lost so much weight and looked so sickly that even my teachers were constantly asking if I was ok. Every morning, I got incredibly sick to my stomach, but I pushed through school even though I felt worse than I had ever felt before. I was young, so I didn’t think much of it. Feeling so bad became my new normal. I went through my water bottles like I was in the Sahara Desert. I didn’t know drinking so much water was weird. For a while, my family and I thought I was just going through a growth spurt, so increased thirst must be normal, right? Wrong. My mother decided something was really wrong. She took me to the doctor and I was diagnosed, and I am so incredibly thankful for my diagnosis. That sounds weird, right? Well, I mean it. I mean it not only because my diagnosis saved my life, but because it made me who I am today. That day changed my life forever. I used to suppress the memory of that day and all the pain that it brought. Now, I am extremely thankful for my type 1 diabetes. If you are reading this and you think I am crazy or you have diabetes and wish with all your heart and soul that you didn’t, please reconsider. Diabetes has brought a lot of pain into my life, as it does for everyone living with it. Initially, I was so jealous of those who do not have it. I would genuinely become infuriated at anyone who complained about their flu shots or made jokes about how they were going to get diabetes because they ate so poorly. I thought to myself, “How can they complain when I get so many shots and so many finger pricks?” and “Why does everyone assume I got sick because I ate poorly?” I hated the stigma that came with the word “diabetes.” I didn’t want people to think I was unhealthy and responsible for my disease. I hated explaining to new friends that I was diabetic because it was something that I had no control over, and I did not think they would understand. Aside from anger and jealousy, diabetes also came with a lot of stress, not only on myself, but on my friends and family members. It has given me days where I feel sick and horrible due to bad blood sugars. It has given me fears of dying early, going blind, and losing my feet. Diabetes has taken away a lot of my time that I could’ve spent on other things. It has made me frustrated, furious, and devastated. Now, after listing all of these negative effects of my diabetes, I probably sound really crazy for sticking by my claim that I have learned to accept it and be grateful for it. Allow me to explain why.
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