NZCB InHouse magazine October/November 2021

Page 46

HEALTH AND WELLBEING —

Supporting someone who is showing signs of stress What happens when you become aware of another person’s stress…say a partner, a colleague, a friend, an employee, a boss? How can you calm them or show your concern? When someone is experiencing stress, they are generally not functioning as they normally would. It’s as though you are working or living with a different human being! One who doesn’t seem to be following any of the usual rules!

But how do you do that? Here are five strategies to use which are invaluable in any situation when dealing with someone who is stressed: 1. Listen deeply. Make an active effort to focus on paying attention to what the person is saying. Put yourself in their shoes and try to see the world from their perspective.

So, how do you support someone who is showing signs of stress, anxiety or tension? What action do you take? Acknowledging stress is the first step from which change springboards. So, do I jump in, tell them they are stressed, give them the benefit of my knowledge and this is what they should do? As you can imagine this may not be the best approach when someone is experiencing stress or anxiety and in fact you may worsen the situation. So, tread carefully… What they don’t need are ‘tough love’ comments such as “toughen up”, “get over it”, “move on”, “you’ll get over it”, “let’s face it, it could be worse”, “things can only get better from here”, “I can remember when I ....”, for example. The person experiencing the stress needs the reverse... they need to be ‘shown the love’.

2. Slow down. Don’t be in a rush when communicating. The average person speaks at 125 words per minute, but we can mentally process multiple times that amount. That means we have to slow our minds down to listen at the pace that someone else is speaking. 3. Focus on the bigger picture. When someone is stressed, they need to feel that they are being heard, they need you to grasp the core of what they’re saying rather than all the minute facts and details. 4. Be aware of your own emotional filters. Just because you don’t agree with what a person is doing or saying, doesn’t mean you are right and they are wrong. When someone says something that you don’t agree with, your brain shuts off and you stop listening. So, the first step is for you to be aware of your own prejudices and biases and withhold judgement. 5. Suggest they get help. Tell the person that you’re noticing they are stressed and ask “How can I help?”. And, depending on the situation and or if it goes on for too long for example 1-2 months then suggest they get some expert support! It’s too complicated for you. Start with one or two of these strategies and focus on ‘showing the love’! And remember, as in previous articles, males and females manifest stress differently, they handle their stress differently and all too quickly you’ll most likely be out of your depth. Professional help is what’s required here.

It is your support they often need One of the most important changes you can make is to take care in the way you engage with the stressed person. Your whole focus should become one of giving support not judgement. When you realise you do not have to solve their situation, that all the person really needs is to feel heard and supported, the nature of your conversations will change for the better.

44

For helpful, practical strategies, communication tools and techniques Linda has written the award-winning book Transforming Your Stress Into Business Success. This is available at: www.transformingyourstressintobusinesssuccess.com Linda Wells – The Business Stress Specialist. Linda is a speaker, trainer and consultant. Over the past 14 years, she has inspired and educated men and women to lead, communicate and respond more effectively to avoid overwhelm, reduce stress and increase productivity, success and enjoyment.


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook

Articles inside

NZCB Affinity Partners

1min
page 62

NEWS BITES

4min
pages 58-59

Adding structural strength with spray foam insulation

1min
page 57

GIB Barrierline® common questions

2min
page 56

Control costs and protect your work with SOLITEX EXTASANA®

2min
pages 54-55

Don’t miss out on important news and offers

2min
page 51

Apprenticeship training – the latest RoVE update

3min
page 50

How to protect yourself from burnout

2min
page 48

Message from the AST Trust

2min
page 49

Supporting someone who is showing signs of stress

3min
pages 46-47

Auckland Family Day a great success

0
page 44

$2,000 raised for Taranaki Coastguard

1min
page 43

Dozens attend inaugural professional development day in Hamilton

2min
page 42

Task Analysis: What it is and when to use it

2min
pages 40-41

Working together to boost Health and Safety

3min
pages 38-39

Green Building Council launches new Homestar

4min
page 36

Damn Spambots! How to win the battle against the scammers

2min
page 37

How tech will help you in and out of lockdown

3min
pages 34-35

Halo Guarantees Limited – one year on

6min
pages 32-33

Calculating accurate labour costs is well-worth the effort

3min
pages 28-29

Tips for better client management

3min
page 31

Why now’s the time to spend money on your brand

3min
page 30

Are you a manager or a leader?

3min
page 27

Are doughnuts the answer to your staffing issues?

3min
pages 24-25

Timber shortage – spring update

3min
page 26

Can you pass on cost increases to your clients?

7min
pages 22-23

Notifiable privacy breaches

3min
pages 20-21

Meet the NZCB Board

5min
pages 18-19
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.