May 2015
Shaped by Your Thoughts How to I mprov e Practi cal l y Anything i n Fi v e M i nutes a Day
trashyour NegativeSelf-Talk Psst? I ?m i nti mi dated by you !
CherishedMagazine.com
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features 1 5 12 45 50 54
Psst...I 'm I ntimidated by You
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Trash Your N egative Self- Talk
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departments I f we had coffee...
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21 Cherished Style
H ow to improve A nything in 5 M inutes a Day 16
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40 Do you have a time- out chair? 2 7
11 Smart Strategies for H andling Criticism 32 CherishedMagazine.com | 3
Hi! I?m Sheryl Siler, founder of Cherished Magazine. Welcome to our first issue of Cherished Magazine. Enjoy! What I really want you to grasp is to cherish yourself ? because God cherishes you. This is a message that I?ve chatted about for a while now over at my blog, GrowBloomInspire.com. What I know to be true from conversations I've had with women all over the place is this: We simply don?t talk very nice to ourselves. This is what I also know to be true; we often don?t even realize we are doing it. This ?Trash Talk?, as I like to call it, causes us to trash our confidence! This issue's theme is "Shaped by Your Thoughts". I want you to dig down, be brave and choose to be your own encourager and really learn to recognize that you are
Wonderful
B eautiful
Amazing Enough
You are shaped by your thoughts and confidence is key lovely lady!
Sh er y l
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By Grow Bloom Inspire Co Editor in Chief Sheryl Siler Advertising Adam Siler Contributing Writers Holley Gerth, Theresa Ceniccola, Tracy Roberts, Susanne Myers, Robin O'Neal Smith, Cynthia Charleen Alexander Views expressed in CherishedMagazine do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the staff to ensure accuracy of the publication content. We do not guarantee the absence of errors or omissions. No responsibility can be assumed. Š CherishedMagazine.
Š GrowBloomInspire Co
All rights reserved. How to reach us Customer care, advertising, subscriptions, renewals, address changes, payments, account information, advertising rates, sponsorship opportunities and inquires: Mail
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Psst? I ?m i nti mi dated by you! by Holley Ger th Yep, I?m intimidated by you. And by you, I mean women. Put me in a room of my peers and it won?t be long before my hands are sweaty and I?m shaking in my boots (yeah, the cute ones I bought from TJ Maxx in the hopes they?d somehow hypnotize everyone into liking me? you know what I?m talking about). It got so bad I even took drastic measures a few summers ago. Disclaimer: there is some serious dorkiness coming in the next few sentences. If you?re offended by that you should stop reading now. I went to the library and I checked out all the social skills books. The ones like, ?How to Have Friends and Influence People without Relying on Your TJ Maxx Boots.? And I read all of them. I know? don?t say I didn?t warn you. Through my ambitious pursuit of coolness, I discovered that my insecurities came from a much deeper place than an inability to make coherent small talk at times. What I thought might be some sort of social ailment turned out to be a spiritual one.
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Inside a voice whispered, ?You?re not enough.? Depending on the day, an extra word might be thrown into that sentence? You?re not pretty enough. You?re not outgoing enough. You?re not likeable enough. So I kept spinning my wheels on an endless treadmill. I?d make progress in one area only to realize I had miles to go in another. Exhausted, I finally began pondering and praying. ?Lord,? I asked, ?Why do women feel as if we?re not enough?? It seemed I heard a whisper in response, ?Because they?re not.? For a moment I thought I had some holy static happening. ?Excuse me, God, it sounded like you said, ?We?re not enough.?Could you repeat that pretty please?? Again, gently and firmly, ?You are not enough.? By then I started thinking perhaps my heart had dialed the wrong number and the devil was on the line. But in that pause it seemed God finished the sentence,
?You are not enough? in me you are so much more.? CherishedMagazine.com | 7
We are much more than pretty? we are wonderfully made. We are much more than likeable? we are deeply loved. We are much more than okay? we are daughters of the King.
I t hink t he enemy t ricks us int o bel ieving we are not enough because he knows if we discover t he t rut h we?l l be unst oppabl e. If you?ve embraced that lie like I did then together we can start trading it for the truth? We are chosen, cherished, created women who have all we need to fulfill God?s plans for our lives. He has made us just as He wants us to be. We have something to offer that no one else can bring? and the world is waiting. Girls, let?s stop shaking in our boots and instead start standing tall for Him together. I can?t do it alone? will you be in this with me?
Holley Gerth is a best-selling author, life coach and speaker. She?d love to hang out with you at www.holleygerth.com.
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& BE SOCI A L!
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trashyour by Sheryl Siler
?This should be easy.? That is what I said to an assignment given to me by my women?s group leader. You see all you had to do is to keep track of how many times you said something negative to yourself for our weekly assignment. I thought, ?Piece of cake. I?m a pretty positive, silver-lining kind of gal. With everything going on I?m glad this is an easy week.? Let me share with you a little story about the day following this little assignment. It was an ordinary day in this homeschool?s mom life. We ate breakfast, got to work at the kitchen table and a few subjects later, it was time for lunch. So we move on with the ordinary 10 | May 2015
day with me fixing some grilled cheese sandwiches while the kids finished up that day?s work. I buttered the bread, gathered the cheese and into the hot pan they went. As the first side grilled, I noticed the small fry pan in the sink leftover from our scrambled eggs that morning and thought, ?I?ll just clean that up real fast.? So I swished and scrubbed and rinsed? still a little stuck on egg so I swished and scrubbed and rinsed. Is that still some egg? So you, as the reader to my little tale, may be trying right now to get my attention. You are probably yelling ?Sheryl? your sandwiches? .flip them before you burn them!? The problem is that you were
not there that day and yes in a moment just after that last ?swish? my nose reminded me what I really came in the kitchen to do. As I quickly turned over the sandwiches and discovered a shade of brown that was darker than I would have liked, these two things immediately popped into my head.
?St upid Me! Can?t I get anyt hing r ight !? Ohhhh? ouch! That wasn?t real positive was it? That simple little mistake of burning a couple of grilled cheese had me saying some pretty harsh things! Stupid? Really? I by no means would say I am stupid but that is exactly what I told myself. Can?t I get anything right? What about the 100 things I did do right up to that point that day? No wonder m y conf idence was so low! In Hebrews 10:35-36 it says: So do not throw away your confidence, it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised.
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I would love to say that the incident of ?trash talk? was an isolated incident that week but I can?t. If truth be told I probably would have filled up a trash can with the insults to myself. I was t hr owing away m y conf idence daily.
Don?t t rash your conf idence ladies! Trash your negat ive self -t alk. Let me put the same assignment on you this week. Pay attention and see how many times this week you say something negative to yourself?
What about you? Are you throwing away your confidence? Sheryl Siler is a devoted wife and homeschooling mom. She has a passion for learning, enjoys teaching and inspires others with her heart of service. Sheryl blogs over at GrowBloomInspire.com. and author of the book, Snapshots: Great Attitudes & Positive Self-Talk.
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We want to know what you would tell your coffee buddy or what you would love to hear your coffee buddy say to you! 14 | May 2015
Le t us k now !
Do you l ike t oday's cof f ee t al k message? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Great! Click here and download the graphic! Use it as a screensaver, print it out and stick it on your mirror or print it on card stock and use it as a card for someone!
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How to I mprov e Practi cal l y
Anything
in Five M inutes a Day Looking for a magic pill? The secret sauce? The quick fix to your greatest challenge? You won?t find that here. But I do want to offer a powerful suggestion on how you can make positive changes in any area of your life in as little as five minutes a day. This is a strategy I?ve used to lose weight, get out of debt, start a business and further my spiritual growth. And it?s one of the simplest tools you can find. I?m talking about pen and paper. Yes, journal writing. Now, before you click away, saying you?re not a writer? or you?ve tried this already? or it?s never going to work? give me a minute to show you how to
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by Theresa Ceniccola
breathe fresh air into a dying art and use journal writing to make improvements in your life.
Want to strengthen your marriage? Buy a special journal and spend five minutes a day writing down something you love, admire or respect about your husband. After a while, you will probably feel a deeper appreciation for your husband, which may effect your behavior towards him and, in turn, his behavior towards you.
You might even give him the journal as a gift. Darren Hardy, author of The Compound Effect, kept a Thanks-Giving journal filled with all the little things he loved about his wife. He gave her the book at the end of the year. I don?t know about you, but if I received a gift like that, I?d fall in love all over again!
Havea professional goal? Get yourself a beautiful business journal and dedicate it to achieving your definition of success. Then spend five minutes every evening writing down the three things you will do the next day to accomplish your goals. Maybe you need to make sales calls. Or complete a proposal. Or hire an assistant. Or submit invoices. When you write it
down, you will take action. (See what I did there? I tricked you into thinking that the writing itself will produce results, when I really meant it wil l creat e an awareness and give you mot ivat ion t o t ake act ion. Either way, the writing time is a good investment!)
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Struggling to get out of debt? Find an old notebook and start a Debt Free Journal. Keep track of your successes ? every credit card you pay off and every temptation you avoid on your mission to becoming debt free. Write down how
much you
spend each day and how close you are to accomplishing your goal. Describe how you will feel when you are living a life without debt. Be sure to include inspirational quotes to help you stay on track.
?Helooks thewholeworld in the facefor heowes not any man.? - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Ready to finally losethat ?baby weight? & eat healthier? Buy a motivational journal and use it to keep track of your diet and exercise routine. I?ve kept a fitness journal for at least 15 years ? probably longer. I used to write down many details, but now I just log my workouts. Even that simple step keeps me focused and on track with my fitness routine. 18 | May 2015
I don?t always keep a food diary, but when I do, I always see results.
I put in my mouth, I automatically want to eat more veggies and less junk!
After about a week of being brutally honest about everything
Looking for a way to deepen your relationship with Christ? A spiritual journal can enhance your daily quiet time and give you a whole new way to pray. Try writing letters to God in your journal. Or exploring a different scripture verse in writing each day. Keep your prayer list in the journal and write down your prayers for others. Be sure to come back to them and write a prayer of thanks when God answers one of your prayers. You can even use your journal to document every time you feel God?s presence in your life. (If you need help getting started, download this free Divinely Inspired Goals Guide.)
Can you seehow journal writing might help you improve something in your life? CherishedMagazine.com | 19
I understand that you have to DO MORE than simply write in your journal for five minutes each day. But the writing is the first step. It?s what creates awareness in your mind so that you can focus on your goal each day. It?s the activity that gives structure to your dream and provides motivation to continue. And while the changes you experience will be gradual, the daily habit of journal writing will give you a simple tool you can use anytime you need it.
How can you usedaily journal writing to makea change in your life? Theresa Ceniccola is the president and founder of the International Christian Mompreneur Network. She?s the premiere business coach for Christian mom entrepreneurs ? known as a Mentor to Moms Who are Running a Business that Supports Faith and Family. She empowers entrepreneurial moms to prosper with wisdom and grace through her coaching circles, educational programs, live retreats and private coaching. Membership in the International Christian Mompreneur Network is free! Join now and receive your Christian Mompreneur Toolkit and the Ten Commandments of a Mompreneur!
20 | May 2015
3 Ideas for Your iCherish Cards: 1. When you run errands - leave them wherever you go. 2. At the doctor or the dentist slip some in the pages of random magazines 3. Add one to the restaurant billfold when you pay your bill. CherishedMagazine.com | 21
Here's a few cards of encouragement to get you started. Sponsored by GrowBloomInspire.com
Click the image above to download this month's free printable .pdf file. We suggest printing on cardstock. Enjoy! 22 | May 2015
M y M om' s It alian Beef Cont r ibut ed by Sher y l Siler
As I sit dow n to w r ite about w hat m em or ies my m other ?s Italian Beef r ecipe br ings m e, I r ealize just how m uch you lear n fr om your m other. As a kid w e never r eally helped my m other cook . We did, how ever, play a lot of gam es of ?hangm an? on the chalkboar d as my m om w ould pr epar e dinner. (She w ould tell you today that it w as because she didn?t have the patience to teach us.) It w asn?t until my m other br oke her w r ist (I think I w as 12) that she has no choice but to br ing m e into the kitchen and to star t shar ing about dicing, slicing, sautĂŠing, r oasting, baking, poaching and the hundr eds of other cooking ter m s and skills to help br ing dinner to the table. Another skill my m other passed dow n, per haps w ithout her r eally know ing it, w as how to thr ow a big par ty? bir thday par ties, gr aduations, holidays and sur pr ise going aw ay par ties. She unknow ingly taught m e how to choose do ahead foods so that
you could enjoy your guests w hile they ar e ther e and not be in the kitchen. M any of those do-ahead foods involved the fr eezer w hich w ould allow things to be cooked w eeks (and even m onths) in advance to help w ith not feeling fr azzled w ith m ad-dash cooking for days in a r ow r ight befor e the par ty. I also lear ned that it allow ed my m other to budget buy for a big gather ing w hen things w er e on sale. A little her e and a little ther e. M y m om is one sm ar t lady. So I find myself alw ays thinking of my m other w hen I am cooking Italian beef. Yes, it is usually because I?m planning for com pany. I also know I?m passing dow n the sam e com pany skills to my daughter and that m akes m e sm ile. Thanks M om . You?r e the best.
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M y M om' s It alian Beef I n gr edi en t s: 3-4 lb bottom r ound r oast 1 Lar ge bottle Italian Dr essing 4 Beef Bouillon Cubes 6 cups w ater 1 tsp. black pepper 2 tsp. gar lic pow der 1 tsp. or egano 1 tsp basil ½ tsp cr ushed r ed pepper (optional) 2 gr een pepper s sliced thin
Di r ect i on s: M ar inate the bottom r ound r oast over night in Italian dr essing. Rem ove fr om m ar inade. Then salt the r oast. Roast at 350 until m edium r ar e. Rem ove r oast and m ake juice by adding 6 cups w ater and 4 beef bouillon cubes and spices below. Add sliced gr een pepper s. W hen r oast is cold thinly slice. (I use an electr ic food slicer.) W hen r eady to ser ve add beef to juice and sim m er until w ar m . M ake sandw iches by ser ving over Italian br ead. It m ay be a little m essy but ladling the br oth over the br ead is delicious. Note: I like to m ar inate r oast over night, bake the next day, then slip in the fr idge to cool befor e m aking the juice (som etim es until the next day) so I can r em ove any har den fat and then the r oast slices easy w hen it is com pletely chilled.
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Gr anny Cook ' s Fr uit Salad Cont r ibut ed by Cy nt hia Char leen A lexand er
Thanksgiving and Chr istm as ar e my favor ite holidays. After a bit of thought, I do believe that Thanksgiving is my ver y favor ite. I love the pr epar ations alm ost as m uch as the finale of the feast. The sm ell of tur key fills the air. M y m other alw ays m ade the dr essing in a lar ge pan. The pr epar ations began days ahead. Cor nbr ead to be baked, br ead to be dr ied and cr um bled into sm all pieces - all w er e par t of the pr epar ation. M other is fr om a lar ge fam ily of seven br other s and a sister. She talks about how they r aised alm ost ever ything they ate. It w as her bit of heaven back ther e in Ar kansas land. I r em em ber one year w hen sever al of her br other s cam e w ith their fam ilies to our hom e for Thanksgiving. She didn?t have a pan big enough to m ake the dr essing in, so she scr ubbed the kitchen sink r eal w ell and then used it for stir r ing up the dr essing.
m other ?s fr uit salad w as my favor ite par t of the m eal. I w ill shar e that r ecipe w ith you my ?Cher ished? fr iends. This continues to be a fam ily favor ite that even the gr andchildr en love! Gr andchildr en and gr ow nups alike have m ade the fr uit salad for events, but it is best w hen M other m akes it! Thanks M other for the m em or ies. M other w ill be 90 year s old in less than a m onth and still br ings her fr uit salad to Thanksgiving and Chr istm as dinner s. Fr iends and r elatives call and ask her for the r ecipe and she keeps it in her file to shar e. She lives alone but is still active in chur ch and calls the m em ber s of her Sunday School class at least once a w eek . Over the year s, that adds up to lots of calls!
How ever, in looking back , my
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Gr anny Cook ' s
Fr uit Salad I n gr edi en t s: 1 lar ge can fr uit cocktail (or canned fr uit chunks) 1 lar ge can pineapple tidbits 1 lar ge can apr icot halves, chopped up 2 cans m andar in or anges 1 package sm all m ar shm allow s Dr essing: 1 egg beaten 1/3 cup sugar 1 T. vinegar (m ust have) 1 T. butter
Di r ect i on s: Com bine dr essing ingr edients and cook slow ly until thick . Cool. 1 pint w hipping cr eam , w hipped to soft peaks. Com bine gently w ith cooled dr essing and dr ained, chilled fr uit. M ix lightly. Refr iger ate over night. It is best if chills 24 hour s. Fold in m ar shm allow s and ser ve. I like to add toasted pecans w hen ser ving.
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Never over mix muf f ins and quickbreads. Fold dough wit h large spoon unt il f lour is barely mixed and dough is lumpy. Sprinkle your cutting board with --Aunt Emma
salt before chopping fresh herbs. It will keep them on the cutting board. Sadie M
Get t o know parchment paper. Great f or lining baking pans or prevent ing past ry f rom st icking t o If you need to finely chop bacon, your roller. GiGi Becky
put it in the freezer for 20 min. This will make it easy to chop without being stringy. "Hugs" Great Aunt Lacy
Run out of baking powder? Combine 3/4 of a teaspoon of baking soda with 1 tablespoon of vinegar. Mary Ellen CherishedMagazine.com | 27
Do You Hav e a
T im e - Ou t Ch air ? by Tracy Roberts by Susanne Myers, Homemakers Hutch Magazine
Perhaps you should? As moms we tend to take care of everyone but ourselves. We talked about this a few times in February?s Homemaker?s Hutch issue. Right now we wanted to share a quick and practical idea to make sure you get some much needed
Do you hav e a t im e ou t c hair f or you r se l f ? No, we?re not talking about a hard wooden stool sitting in the corner that you have to go sit on if you?ve been a bad mom. We?re talking about a comfy overstuffed chair, or a spot on the couch you can curl up on and take a little family time out from time to time. Keep a stack of your favorite magazines next it, or the book you?re reading right now. If you like scented candles, keep one of those around as well along with a nice pillow and a little blanket to throw over your legs during the cold months. Brew yourself a cup of coffee or tea and pour it into your favorite mug. Now comes the important part . . .
T ak e at l e ast 15 m inu t e S e v e r y sing l e day and sit and r e l ax in you r t im e ou t c hair . 28 | May 2015
It doesn?t matter that the laundry isn?t done and put away yet, or
that you really should be reorganizing your kids?closets. Consider that sometimes your sanity must win out over the mounds of laundry and dishes. YOU need your attention, too. It can wait. Create a little peaceful haven for yourself and spend a little time in it. Sit down and catch up on your favorite TV show or podcast. If you?re the crafty kind, have your knitting, crochet or cross stitch next to you.
Not e f r om T r ac y I like to sit down with a good book, a cup of coffee or glass of iced tea and sit outside when the weather is nice. (I live in Florida. I can do this more often than Susanne can. ;-)) You should do whatever you like to do to relax for a few minutes. Need a nap. Take one. Need to talk. Call a friend.
Wh at e v e r you d o t ak e t h e t im e t o t ak e c ar e of you ? you d e s e r v e it . Besides, I?m sure there have been studies that show spending even just a little time taking care of yourself each day will keep you grounded and make you a better wife and mom throughout the rest of the day. This Article is a reprint from the February 2015th edition of Homemaker?s Hutch. A digital magazine brought to you by Tracy Roberts of MomsinABlog.com and Susanne Myers of HillbillyHousewife.com. CherishedMagazine.com | 29
New Leaf Earri ngs
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Jul i a Neck l ace
Cambodi a Pearl Bracel et
Cl ear Spri ngs
Gol den Bombol ul u
Earth and Spri ng
I nf i ni ty Scarf
Earri ng's
Brai ded Bracel et
Medallion Scarf
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Tri -Leaf Earri ngs
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Z ul f a-Spi ral Cuf f
M edal l i on Scarf
11
t r a Sm St rategies for Handling Cr it icism By Robi n O?Neal Sm i th
The words stung! I was almost in tears. I swallowed hard. I knew his words were not meant to hurt me, just to help me understand what I had done wrong, but they still hurt. Have you ever felt that way? All of us have dealt with criticism at some point. How did you handle it? Experts say there are at least four different ways people handle criticism. Defending ? This person becomes defensive, but don?t lose sleep over negative feedback. They often think the critic might be wrong, but are fine to leave a bit it alone. Self-convincing ? This person takes negative feedback personally, but instead of blaming themselves they deflect the blame onto others. They often challenge or even argue against the negative
statements as a means of convincing everyone the criticism is unjust. Internalizing ? This person seems to accept criticism well on the surface, but they beat themselves up inside. They mentally put themselves down and are overly hard on their self Seeking Feedback ? This person asks lots of questions. They might feel bad about the criticism, but they shake it off. They just want to know why the person criticizing thinks that way and what they could do to improve or change the situation. Many of us handle criticism in several of these ways depending on circumstances and the person providing the criticism. Criticism and negative remarks often stick with us much longer than compliments giving us a negativity bias. Recently I was at a conference CherishedMagazine.com | 33
and my boss called about a project I was in charge of. He wanted to know if something had been submitted by a subcontractor we had been working with. I thought it had, but said I needed to check. It had not been submitted, but was to be submitted that day.
My boss was criticizing the sub-contractor who had not filed the form, yet I was taking the criticism personally. I was beating myself up for not making sure it was submitted and double checking on it.
I was hearing he is not satisfied with my work. This was silly, but that is where my mind went. I was internalizing the criticism and was upset for more than 24 hours over it. In time I could see it from a different perspective, but in the heat of the moment, it was upsetting.
Then he asked why and I gave him the explanation, but he was critical that it had not already been done. Now this was someone else that was submitting the papers and they were being submitted more than 3 weeks in advance of the deadline.
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Feeling upset about being criticized is a normal response and we all experience it. Allowing it to take control can ruin our happiness and destroy productivity. Regardless of how you currently handle criticism, you can improve the way you deal with it in the future.
Tips for Handling
Cr i t i c i sm
Look at the source. Does the person have the authority to be criticizing? If it is your boss or supervisor, then yes, they probably have a legitimate. You don?t have to take criticism or you can ignore it from people you don?t respect or know. Everyone has an opinion, but if they don?t hold a place of importance in your life, ignore the criticism. What is their motivation? Is it to help you or just to be critical?
Understand mistakes are not entirely bad. Everyone makes mistakes and it is an opportunity to learn and grow. People who don?t make any mistakes and not doing anything. Learn from the mistakes. Think about people the Thomas Edison who made many, many mistakes before he had a light bulb that worked.
Remember the action is being criticized not you. People are criticizing the action or the job you did or something you said. They are not critical of YOU. Sometimes it is hard to separate the two, but you must. Try not to take it personally. Learn to view criticism as simple feedback to improve. Remember it is feedback on something you did or said, not who you are.
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Question the person criticizing. Don?t be defensive, but respectfully ask questions so you can improve. It shows the criticizer you are listening and allows you to learn more about why they are have the opinions they do.
Be Reasonable. If upset, calm yourself down before responding. Responding in anger is never a good idea. If there is validity in the criticism, admit you are not perfect, everyone makes mistakes and ask how to improve. Thank the person for offering to help you. If you can?t respond calmly with grace, then just be silent.
Don?t be a hater. Don?t criticize others unjustly. Putting yourself out there takes courage and you want to build others up, not tear them down with criticism. This includes the person who is criticizing you. Don?t retaliate!
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Some people should just be ignored. As mentioned in # 1, some people are not worth paying attention to. Don?t expose yourself to criticism for people you do not respect or who have not earned the right to give criticism. Some people are just snarky and criticize everything and are not worth your time or attention.
Fix what needs fixed, and ignore the rest. if there is truth to the criticism and there is something that can be fixed, by all means, do you best to improve or fix the problem. But feel free to ignore the rest.
Don?t let it haunt you! Thinking about the criticism for days and weeks is not a good thing. It is important that we comprehend the issue and what might need changed, we take the steps to change what we can and we let it go. Replaying the words over and over in your mind does no one any good.
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Do what is right for you. No matter what you do, someone out there will be critical. The bottom line is you need to what is right for you. People will always criticize your choice but if in your heart you know it is right for you, the criticism is easier to ignore. Do Awesome things! Be your awesome self and share it with the world. Yes people will criticize, but don?t let it stop you. Use it as fuel to move forward and grow. The bottom line is YOU are an awesome person and can do awesome things. Don?t for a minute let criticism stop you from doing what you are passionate about. Maybe you are not perfect, but you are learning. You will get better and better and just by trying you are being amazing! Be your awesome self and do awesome things! We will all deal with criticism throughout our life, the key is how we deal with it and learning to release the negativity we associate with it. Use criticism to help you learn and grow and make a difference. No matter what anyone tells you remember: YOU are AWESOME! , Robin O'Neal Smith is a wife and the mother of a 19 year old son. She enjoys spending time with her family, traveling, social networking, blogging, and cooking. Robin is a solopreneur, volunteer, and works full-time as the Chief Information Officer for a school district. She blogs about life, family, food, healthy living and social media at BeSocialGetSuccess.com 38 | May 2015
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Let 's have a quick chat about . . . You're Already Amazing Aut hor - Holley Gert h
Buy from Amazon
Wit h t his heart -t o-heart message, Holley Gert h invit es you t o embrace one very import ant t rut h--t hat you t ruly are already amazing. Like a t rust ed f riend, Holley gent ly shows you how t o f orget t he lies and expect at ions t he world f eeds you and inst ead believe t hat God loves you and has bigger plans f or your lif e t han you've even imagined.
40 | May 2015
3 p o T Our 1. Whoever said "st icks and st ones may break my bones but names will never heart me" must not have experienced childhood. Sent ences slung at our souls would deeply. (P44) 2. Inst ead of cont rolling ot hers, I cont rolled myself . I set unrealist ic expect at ions f or my behavior. I put st andards in place t hat were impossible t o meet . I want ed t o be perf ect --which would be t he ult imat e display of cont rol. (p109) 3. You really are loved more t han you know. (P188) From You're Already Aamazing, Holley Gert h, Revell Publshing, 2012
You quest ion . . . . Is who I am Okay? You're more t han okay you're His. (PS. 139:14) CherishedMagazine.com | 41
Click to order
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Hey Lov el y Ladi es Gi v e a Gi f t Sub scri pti on to Ch eri sh ed M agazi ne Today!
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This is a reprint of Day 14 of Overcome Your Negativity 21 Days to Positive Thinking, a Better Attitude and a Happier You with compliments from the inspiration shop at Grow Boom Inspire.com.
Th e in n er speech , you r th ou gh ts, can cau se you to be r ich or poor, l oved or u n l oved, h appy or u n h appy, attr active or u n attr active, power fu l or weak . Ral ph Ch ar el l
Today we are going to work on those inner remarks you say to yourself.
like ?tall?. Once you have brainstormed, you will pick out the most destructive labels.
Actually today I?m going to ask you to label yourself. Grab your journal sheet and take a moment and write down all the labels you put on yourself.
Okay, this is a little hard for me but I?m going to share my three most destructive labels with you. Since I?m going to do this? I hope it helps one of you.
A label can be things you do like ?mother? or descriptive labels
In a past bible study, I had the assignment as I gave it to you. CherishedMagazine.com | 45
To come up with then pick out destructive ones. I these three very labels: fat
labels and the most had written destructive
? failure ? lazy. I cringed actually when I just reread what I had wrote. I am glad that is over. Now that I was brave and shared with you mine? you be brave and be honest with yourself. Trust me because it will help.
Now l ook at your l abel s? are t hey f ounded in t rut h? Well, the fat remark? well, I was overweight. Some how saying I?m overweight doesn?t have the same negative blow as being called fat? but I took that as a truth. Lazy ? I was so busy? .I couldn?t get everything done. Back then, I felt that just meant I wasn?t willing to give up more sleep to get it done so I must be lazy. Not the truth. I wasn?t lazy? I
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needed to set Overcome Your Negativity priorities and be willing to not worry about the things that really didn?t matter. It meant looking at what I was doing and perhaps letting less important things go. A failure ? honestly it wasn?t founded in truth. Sure, I haven?t always been perfect. No big surprise there since I?m not God. After some journal writing and soul searching, I realized this train of thought stemmed from a divorce even though these thoughts should have been ancient history. It was a huge hurt to find out that my husband felt the need to be with someone else? you know I wasn?t good enough? he liked someone else better. However, his choices did not make me a failure. Now the next part of this exercise is to take those destructive labels and take big black marker and cross them off. Choose today for that label not to stick anymore. I work to overcome the damaging label from that past relationship of not feeling good enough. I admit it. Most
days? I?m over it. It?s been a long time. Then my poor husband will get an out of the blue react response from me. I jump the gun and go into defense mode. He could say, ?Hey, we are out of laundry detergent.? I think he is trying to say to me I can?t believe you let us run out---like ?you?re not good enough?. He really is just trying to let me know we are out of laundry detergent. By his saying, we are out of laundry detergent; he was not trying to infer that I was a failure as a wife. Okay? I give you permission to laugh but I will admit to you? I have done it! I shared this with you for a purpose. Take those destructive things captive. By you admitting the negative, you have a chance to capture it, take hold of it and mark it out. You will then begin to recognize instances like the laundry detergent for what it is. Catch the slip? .apologize and move on? .
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Click here for a free printable copy of this journal sheet
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Click here for a free printable copy of this journal sheet
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I amabeautifulworkinprogess! My Creat or inst illed unique beaut y in me f rom t he beginning and I enhance t his beaut y more and more as t ime goes by. I am like an unf inished mast erpiece and I allow my beauty to shine through at every stage of creation.
Like a magnif icent paint ing, I show t he colors of my world in brilliant juxt aposit ion. Even t he casual observer can f eel my passion. Like a splendid sculpt ure, my experiences are brought t o lif e in every nook and cranny. As I grow and learn, I mold beaut y int o it s f orm.
Like t he most wonderf ul symphony, I st rive t o compile t he richness of lif e int o joyf ul expression. The highs and lows of my lif e are all t here, combined int o a beaut if ul melody.
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I am the personif ication of these works of art! As I add splendor t o my lif e, it s int ensit y is brought t o exist ence t hrough my very being. Adding splendor is easy! Every new experience I live, every new t alent I discover, and every skill I develop adds t o my beaut y. Whenever I learn somet hing new, I incorporat e it int o t he beaut if ul work in progress t hat I am.
I become complet e only when t here is not hing lef t t o discover or experience. In t he meant ime, I strive to realize the joy of the journey, simply adding to my beauty as I travel through my path in lif e. Today, I choose t o add t o my beaut y by discovering somet hing new and embracing excit ing opport unit ies. These act ions increase t he richness of my lif e and brings great er f ulf illment .
Do I f eel like a beaut if ul work in progress?
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