City Weekly November 22, 2018

ONFESSIONS C I T Y

W E E K L Y

N O V. 2 2 , 2 0 1 8 | V O L . 3 5 N 0 . 2 6

LDS

C

Current and former LDS faithful flock to new Facebook group to share personal horror stories.

by

Rich Kane

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2 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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A new Facebook page is getting a lot of attention by people who want to share their LDS church horror stories.

Cover illustration by Derek Carlisle

13

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Graphic designer “The best part of my job is being able to be creative and work with other creative people,” Hair, one of our talented in-house artists says.

“That feeling never gets old.”

When not playing the guitar in folk rock band The Dockets, he likes chilling with his wife and “designing posters for anything and everything.”

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Guv discusses church’s role in cannabis “compromise.” facebook.com/slcweekly

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In jail, Cho-mos (child molesters, accused, or convicted) are on a kill on sight list. There isn’t a damn thing the jailers can do to stop it. Not saying the guy deserved being killed, but it’s a given that if you’re accused of being one, you’re dead. End of story.

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Multiple sexual partners Anal sex recipient History of STD Prior HPV infection Immunocompromised Male to male sex

Via Twitter I’ve been told by police officers that Sim Gill only prosecutes crimes that are slam dunk cases.

My mom’s house was burglarized multiple times. My house was burglarized and I knew the perp. But the case didn’t go past the initial report, because the officers say Gill won’t prosecute them. I was told that I basically needed a confession.

Prints, video, DNA were not enough. But, on the other hand, a family member was falsely accused by a psycho vindictive wife of abuse and jailed, even though she was the abuser and outweighed him by over 200 pounds and 5 inches. The cops wouldn’t even listen to him, though he was the one to call 911 after she tried to kill him, and they arrested him when she played innocent victim. She tried to kill him again after he was released by the detective who said it was unfounded. She got off scot-free even after three attempts to kill him.

P. TOMI AUSTIN

Via cityweekly.net

Opinion, Nov. 8, “The Lady Weeps”

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4 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Cover story, Nov. 8, “Locked & Loaded”

This is a different world today.

LINDA ANNESE

Via CW comments

Aimee Steinly Nurse Practitioner

It would be cheaper to remove [Trump].

CHRISTA TURNELL Via Facebook

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Online news post, Nov. 19, Guv discusses LDS church’s role in drafting

cannabis “compromise” legislation

And because lemmings jump off cliffs, Utah should, too.

JIM PLATT

Via Facebook More like Saudi Arabia.

CHARLIE WALKER Via Facebook

Utah theocracy at its best.

JUSTIN FAURSCHOU Via Facebook

It’s not supposed to work that way.

KATE WARD Via Facebook

He’d love it if Utah was a bastion of nothing but Mormons.

Wake up, take a hit off that bong and drink some coffee, this is bullshit and the Mormon church has no right to interfere with voting and to try to make everyone live by their words. And no, I’m not moving, I’ve been here almost all my life, so I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.

MARK COPELAND Via Facebook

I really hope he, and the state Legislature get named in the upcoming lawsuit. It is beyond time for the LDS church to get out of politics, or if they wish to continue, they need to start paying to play, taxes that is.

MANNY JONES Via Facebook

What he said can and will be used in a court of law. Thank you.

ALDIN NIYOL JOHNSON Via Facebook

Everyone needs to vote them or their cookie cutter replacements out next election. Show them the power of the vote.

MEL P. STONE Via Facebook

Yeah, OK. I grew up in Massachusetts and lived in Utah for 13 years. That’s an absolute horseshit comparison.

COREY ADAM Via Facebook

But does their governor take orders from them in closed door meetings?

manipulate their agenda.

Via Twitter

And yet weed is totally legal in Massachusetts. Those damn priests!

CLAUDE HENRY SMOOT

Give me one example of when the Catholic church called for the governor of Massachusetts to demand the Legislature be called into special session to override the will of Massachusetts voters with a replacement bill drafted by lobbyists for the Holy See?

DREW HOWELLS Via Facebook Exactly!

JOSETTE TAYLOR Via Facebook They do it covertly behind closed doors. The East Coast works that way. I know; I was born there … Bottom line is: you figure it out. I already know.

PETE HELFRICH Via Facebook

I lived in Massachusetts till age 35. It simply doesn’t work like that. Yes, there is a big Catholic presence, but there’s also a huge Jewish community and outside influence (the mob, etc.)

Utah is run by the church and for the church. There is no separation of church and state at all.

COREY ADAM Via Facebook

As a Catholic, I can tell you that they don’t tell us how to vote during mass.

KRISTIN STOCKING Via Facebook

Nor mail propaganda letters with false information to

CARLOS VARGAS Via Facebook

COREY ADAM Via Facebook

Whatever. No church in my politics—end of story!

DAVE GIBSON Via Facebook

What he fails to mention, is that the church as an institution, drafted this bill.

JASON HUFF Via Facebook

There is a difference between having a say and having a monopoly. Hey, at least he acknowledged it.

KATY LYNN WARD Via Facebook

Two wrongs don’t make it right. And neither does acknowledgement.

ANDREA WIXSON Via Facebook

Whatever happened to the separation of church and state? We’ve been lied to from the beginning.

DAWN WOODIN Via Facebook

If a religious organization wants to play in politics then by all means do so, but, you have to give up your tax exempt status and pay your taxes.

CHRISTOPHER SIMON Via Facebook

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PRIVATE EY

No Compromise

All day, every day, some part of my body hurts. Both knees are shot with bone rubbing on bone. My right hip feels like a bike sprocket. The soles of my feet painfully cry out with every pounding step after step. I can’t grab a glass from the kitchen cabinet with my right arm, so I use my left, salvaged by a full shoulder replacement in 2016. All of that, plus, my fingers and wrists lock up tighter than a Stanley Hardware padlock. Did I mention my fingers and wrists?

I’m told—by doctors in white gowns and by Dr. Google himself—that my joint pain is due to arthritis.

Migraines come and go; mostly come, it seems. The muscles in both legs, top to bottom have acquired a resistance to Bengay. Nothing soothes them, not even the Voltaren rub I nabbed in Greece, making getting up from a chair a weird combination of adventure and dread. My stomach is a mess.

Warm milk at bed time used to help, but I can no longer get the milk out of the fridge (in those odd times I’m even able to get to the fridge). Climbing stairs is like tackling Mount Everest in miniature. The elevator I proudly never used in the City Weekly office is now my best friend.

In the past year, I’ve had perhaps a dozen nights of restful sleep. I realize that for some, that’s a lot, and I’m not meaning to imply I have a luxury sleep pass. I don’t. I merely remember those nights, because a few months ago I acquired some edible cannabis products which I ate at bedtime. I slept well. Upon waking, my joints and muscles felt better. I wasn’t ready to run a marathon and I didn’t become 18 again, but I clearly experienced relief.

Then, my supply ran out.

I’d dabbled with Utah-legal CBD oils and capsules, which offered some relief, but not to the degree that a THC-laden

B Y J O H N S A LTA S @johnsaltas

chewy snack did. Around the same time, I was handed a jar of Mary Jane’s Medicinals Salve, illegal in our state thanks to its cannabis-infused 90 mg of THCA and 20 mg of THC. In less than a week, my left wrist that was fully inflexible and sore as hell, was working again pain free. Suffice it to say, if Mary Jane’s wants a testimonial, I’d be happy to provide one.

I’m just one of the close to half a million Utahns who voted in favor of Proposition 2 earlier this month. I would have voted for it even without my personal trials and testament, and make no mistake: My own needs pale mightily compared to the thousands of Utah patients who traveled the path to enlightenment way before me. Those Utahns are comprised by PTSD sufferers, people battling with opioid addiction, those afflicted with cancer, Crohn’s disease or epilepsy, and everyday neighbors with maladies far worse than mine.

Prop 2 passed handsomely despite last minute hijinks

by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The leadership of Utah’s dominant religion, probably realizing it zigged when its followers zagged, decided to go all in against the initiative. It sicced high-profile minions to do the bidding, including Marty Stephens, a former Utah House Speaker, current LDS church lobbyist and the LDS stake president—also, a man who never met a church or state he couldn’t conjoin; Michelle McOmber, fearmonger and CEO of the Utah Medical Association—the pedestal from which she proclaimed Prop 2 was all about recreational use, not medicine. (Tell that to the 1930s American Medical Association and to each of my dozen doctors who all support medical cannabis, Michelle.) And Walter Plumb, pant-leg to Sen. Orrin Hatch, moralist and wannabe bon vivant whose nonsensical antics actually garnered votes in favor of the bill he opposed. Alas, their carrying-ons didn’t work, and they were holding a metaphorical baggie of seeds and stems. Then, someone had the vision to fully knee-cap Prop 2 by recognizing defeat and proclaiming victory.

That maneuver is what became known as the “compromise” to Prop 2, which was no compromise at all, but an elaborate bluff the likes of which haven’t been seen since the Battle of Fishguard in 1797. At Fishguard, a single, blank cannon shot fired by the British so frightened a French scouting vessel, that the French military gave up the fight and retreated from battle. That’s what happened here. Individuals who ostensibly represent Utah patients went into full retreat when Prop 2 opponents threatened to dial up the pressure against the measure. They gave up the ghost. Major medical cannabis patient factions like TRUCE and Epilepsy Utah were not even invited to the secret negotiations. Nor were you.

The public knew nothing of the compromise until it was announced barely a month before the general election. To put it mildly, constituents were pissed. The primary target of their ire was the LDS church, which hasn’t suffered similar criticism since it played all the wrong notes on LGBTQ rights more than a decade ago. That’s hardly a surprise, though, since it was Marty Stephens, as House Speaker, who did his masters’ bidding and championed the loudest against same-sex marriage. This time around, he’s moralizing again while nefariously working behind the scenes it appears, only proving that some people—and certain institutions—never learn.

On Dec. 3, a special legislative session will convene to debate, modify and pass some version of the Prop 2 compromise, which only means they are about to nullify your vote and make medical cannabis either hard or nearly impossible to obtain. Don’t let them negotiate your health away. Call your local elected officials. Call the governor. Write letters. Take to social media now.

You have a voice. Use it. My bones will thank you. CW Send feedback to comments@cityweekly.net

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POST-PROP 2 GAME PLAN

You might have read that the backers of Proposition 2 to legalize medical cannabis are thinking about suing over undue influence by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. That the people have spoken by approving a very difficult citizen initiative seems to have simply energized opponents, who have called for an immediate special session to significantly modify the law.

Former Mayor Rocky Anderson is leading the charge against eviscerating it.

Indivisible Ogden will hold a Save Prop 2 Special Legislative Session Meeting to “explore options to make the peoples’ voices heard.” Pleasant Valley Library, 5568 S. Adams Ave., Ogden, Saturday, Nov. 24, 1-4 p.m., free, bit. ly/2QOEr4A.

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—KATHARINE BIELE Send tips to revolt@cityweekly.net

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Housing Disconnect

Here’s what’s happened in the last week or so: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints announced plans to build a colossal glass building in downtown Salt Lake City. At least one city councilman expressed delight at the thought of a rising skyline. Meanwhile, two proposed developments—one at the old Cottonwood Mall site and the other atop Emigration Canyon—were met with intense neighborhood pushback. All this while Utah’s public school enrollment is bubbling into the 660,000 range and nonprofit organization Utah Foundation notes one in five Salt Lake residents say housing is not affordable. There is a huge disconnect—a fevered rush to build big, expensive developments, an expectation that suburban areas can fill the lowerend gap, but no real plan for mixed-use, affordable buildings that communities can get behind.

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Convert This

Who knew conversion therapy was even a thing anymore?

Then again, we thought white supremacy was a thing of the past, too. But Utah has the unique distinction of not only mentally exiling the LGBTQ community, but also encouraging this controversial, extreme and debunked method of turning the gay straight. Since Boy Erased hit theaters, a renewed awareness—and stunned disbelief—has emerged. Now, Equality Utah is hoping to drive a stake into the practice and lobby for a law banning conversion therapy, The Salt Lake Tribune reported. Suicide prevention will be the hallmark strategy, not only because it affects this community disproportionately, but also because the “Mormon” church has disavowed the practice. Still, Utahns understand that disavowing practices doesn’t always work and fundamentalism often survives official pronouncements.

Utah’s Trojan Horse

The Deseret News’ Jay Evensen keeps warning the people of Utah that ranked-choice voting is a Trojan horse, hiding an unwanted candidate who wins in the nation’s reddest state. The Legislature has set up an eight-year pilot project for municipal elections with multiple candidates, but so far there are no takers. This apparently delights Evensen, who pointed to Maine’s experiment as just too damned complicated and fraught with unintended consequences. He gives it a small advantage—civility—but, hey, you could end up with someone new. USA Today suggests we should use it in presidential elections. The Boston Globe and even Esquire gave it high praise. So Utah is worried about electing someone they didn’t really want. Like that could ever happen.

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NEWS

MEDICAL CANNABIS

Blowing Smoke?

Concerns abound on the medical cannabis compromise bill poised to pass in December.

T

“You’re literally having the state become a drug dealer,” Christine Stenquist, seen here at TRUCE’s midterm election watch party, says.

| CITY WEEKLY |

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 11

you need, you’re going to go back to what you know and what you’ve always done.”

Short of full-throated legalization, Altieri says NORML’s ideal medical cannabis program is one that doesn’t have a list of qualifying conditions, allows for patients to cultivate their own plants at home and permits a diverse retail distribution of an array of products that keep up with public demand. In other words, the opposite of the compromise bill.

“It seems like lawmakers there are overcomplicating a process just for the sake of overcomplicating it,” Altieri says. “We have states that have had this for decades that we can look to as good models.”

Like Carrillo, Stenquist’s stake in patient access is personal—she’s had to break the law for six years. Medical cannabis has helped her manage pain resulting from a botched brain tumor surgery. While she acknowledges that Prop 2 isn’t perfect, she thinks the compromise undermines voters’ voices, and isn’t in the best interests of Utahns who need medical cannabis to live happier, healthier lives. “They’re not just throwing out the baby with the bathwater,” she says. “They’re replacing the baby.”

Carrillo’s pain makes it tough to leave his South Salt Lake home. He didn’t go to any parties on election night to celebrate Utah voters passing Prop 2. Scrolling through social media photos that evening, he noticed something about the people in the crowds: they looked healthy. It didn’t seem to him like the they were the Utahns who need medical cannabis to cope with their suffering. Sick people, it seemed to Carrillo, were tied up that night.

“Because of their medical conditions, they couldn’t make it,” he says. In witnessing the revelry secondhand, Carrillo’s thoughts were with the potential Prop 2 beneficiaries, not the benefactors. “These are the people that need to be taken care of: the people that can’t make it to these events.” CW

promise, arguing it addresses flaws in the ballot initiative that could inadvertently divert cannabis to the state’s illegal drug trade. “I don’t know why anybody would be opposed to this,” Herbert said. “Is it perfect? Probably not, but that’s why we have a public process that allows us to modify, improve, amend as we go forward. But we’re in a good place here.”

Herbert added he’s willing to listen to any point of view that could improve the medical cannabis program, including tweaking the distribution model. “If we can make it better, we ought to make it better,” he said. “Let’s hear what your recommendations are and see if we can build some consensus. That’s how you do legislation.”

According to Altieri, Utah’s handling of the matter is unprecedented among the more than 30 states that have legalized the substance for medicinal purposes. To his knowledge, no other states’ politicians have tinkered with a medical cannabis program before voters weighed in on a ballot initiative. “It’s never been this nearly full rewrite, weeks before people are set to vote on it,” Altieri says.

“It seems like the Utah Legislature is really trying to reinvent the wheel here.”

Altieri’s issues with the compromise are broad, but they all converge on the same idea: access. “Allowing patients to grow their own medicine is, in our opinion, crucial to a patient-centric program,” he says.

Freedom to cultivate means pained or sickened Utahns don’t have to travel to a private dispensary or health department in order to acquire their meds. It also spares cardholders from depending on the strains administered under Utah’s watchful eye. “The state will water it down, just like they tried to do with alcohol,” Carrillo says.

If it’s that much trouble to acquire medical cannabis, Carrillo predicts those in need will go back to the black market.

“If you can’t get access to the medicine

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based on the population—in Salt Lake County, there’d be eight. In the proposed compromise version, the state would become a major distributor, and there could be a maximum of 10 private pharmacies across the state.

“That’s nowhere near enough to meet what patient demand is going to be,” Erik Altieri, executive director of the Washington, D.C.-based National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML), says. Alex Iorg, from the Utah Patients Coalition, tells City Weekly that between 50 and 200,000 people could be eligible for medical cannabis in Utah, depending on how difficult it is to attain a medical card.

Christine Stenquist is more blunt.

“You’re literally having the state become a drug dealer,” the founder of Together for Responsible Use and Cannabis Education (TRUCE) says. “Utah is basically giving the federal government the finger.”

Conversely, Josh Daniels, a policy advisor to the Utah Patients Coalition—the group that led the ballot initiative and was involved in drafting the settlement legislation—stresses that the state would be involved in distributing, not growing, processing or dealing cannabis under the compromise. Both the central fill and private pharmacies would acquire the medicine from private cultivators and processors. “The state of Utah is basically volunteering itself to violate federal law for the sake of helping medical patients,” Daniels says. “That’s kind of impressive.”

At his monthly news conference last week, Gov. Gary Herbert said he’d call upon Utah representatives in Congress to pass legislation that would ease federal restrictions on cannabis. “At least take it off the Schedule I list so we can have robust research, and do clinical trials and studies, and decide what in fact the science and research tells us how we can use, most effectively, cannabis as a medicine,” Herbert said.

The governor also defended the com-

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

he soreness is constant, but it gets worse when the seasons change, and the plummeting temperatures mean more pain for Joshua Carrillo. Chilly weather makes the throbbing shoot from his legs into his spine and neck—an agonizing consequence of an October 2017 crash when an SUV launched him into the air after it hit his motorcycle. “Bro, I’m laid up since Halloween because of the cold,” he says one mid-November morning. “I literally crawl up the stairs to get to my bed.”

Relief might soon be on the way for people like Carrillo—those who have relied for years on medical cannabis to manage chronic pain or illness. Utah’s path to legalizing the plant has been filled with twists, turns, complaints and compromises. A month before the Proposition 2 ballot initiative passed, state legislators, faith leaders, supporters and opponents gathered at the Capitol to unveil a compromise bill—a work-in-progress that lawmakers will reportedly iron out and approve at a Dec. 3 special session.

Carrillo likes the bulk of that agreement. “It’s a step in the right direction,” he says. “It’s just not giving you exactly what the people voted for.”

The compromise differs from the ballot initiative in several key ways. Gone is the controversial “grow your own” provision that would have allowed patients to cultivate up to six personal cannabis plants after January 2021 if they didn’t live within 100 miles of a dispensary. Also changed is the means by which patients could obtain it. In Prop 2, they’d go to a local dispensary. Under the compromise’s updated draft, cardholding Utahns could acquire medical cannabis from two different facilities: a local health department that received the medicine from a state-run “central fill pharmacy,” or a privately operated dispensary.

There’s concern the compromise offers fewer locations for pickup than if the ballot initiative became law. If Prop 2 were implemented, the number of dispensaries in a given area would be

RAY HOWZE

BY KELAN LYONS klyons@cityweekly.net @kelan_lyons

12 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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weeks later, my dad died suddenly.

He came to the funeral and was being very kind to me so we started dating again. He took advantage of my very fragile state and raped me just a few weeks later. When I finally had the guts to talk to someone, I went to my bishop. He told me that I should not tell anyone about it because I would ruin his (my rapist’s) life and he had so much potential as a strong priesthood holder in the church.”

Page admins Clint Worsley, 37, and Brett Wells, 47, say secrecy is a helpful outlet for those posting—an avenue for people to reveal their oftenpained experiences, perhaps for the first time publicly.

“I wanted to help people in a way they haven’t been able to get help before,” Worsley says. “They relived it in order to share it. How many do you think just wanted to block those experiences out? But now they have a way to tell their story to people. I imagine for them that’s not easy.”

“I was crazy surprised at the response,” Wells says. “People are embracing it and sending us stories. I have another Facebook page called Bite My Shiny Metal Ass, and it took eight or nine months to get to 500 likes, so to hit that number in two

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 13

“While attending BYU, I would hook up often with a man [who] taught[there]. He had a regular practice of hooking up with his students.

He targeted cute, slightly overweight girls with low self-esteem. I’m glad I got out of BYU without an STD.” “When I was 18, I broke up with my returned-missionary boyfriend (also the son of a bishop), because he tried to force me to take my clothes off so he could ‘just look at me.’ A few

These are a few stories from just the first week in the existence of the Facebook group Anonymous Mormon Stories & Secrets, which went live Sept. 1 and quickly exploded with likes and follows.

Read through the many stories that have been posted since: tales of sexual assault and rape, horrific abusive relationships, gay shaming with failed attempts at conversion therapy and more. There also are milder revelations, like one woman who shares her experience of not being allowed into a stake dance because she committed the sin of wearing Levi’s.

While there’s no way to fact-check these anonymously submitted stories, many are so richly detailed and personal that it’s difficult to believe they could be fiction.

| CITY WEEKLY |

everal years ago, my bishop took my temple recommend for masturbation. My wife was devastated and I felt tremendous crushing shame. I hated myself and was convinced I had a serious addiction. Fast forward seven years: My wife and I both have left the church, I have a much healthier view of myself and my sexuality, and that bishop is now in jail for the rest of his life for child molestation.”

@rkane29

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By Rich Kane | comments@cityweekly.net |

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A new Facebook page has been getting a lot of attention by people who want to share their often-horrific church stories.

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14 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Brett Wells served a mission, but eventually started questioning the faith. Like many who have left the church since the rise of the internet in the 1990s, he began researching church history online and didn’t like what he read.

weeks is just mind-boggling.”

Worsley was raised a Christian Scientist; Wells is an ex-Mormon who was brought up in the faith and had his name removed from church records in 2013.

Both have had negative experiences with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Worsley feels its influence on Utah state law contributed to him losing his child.

“My ex got pregnant, then didn’t want anything to do with me,” Worsley recalls. “She tried to adopt the kid out and I tried to stop it. She went through LDS Family Services, and they told her to move from Salt Lake City to Orem … never gave me the sex or due date or her new address, because I would’ve needed all that to stop the adoption. She kept all that from me. We went through court and I ended up losing, because the laws here are so against men that they really don’t have a chance when the woman decides those things. And the religion has a lot to do with that.”

Wells served a mission, but eventually started questioning the faith. Like many who have left the church since the rise of the internet in the 1990s, he began researching church history online and didn’t like what he read. In addition to the Anonymous Mormon Stories & Secrets page, he also either started or moderates several other public and members-only Facebook pages with names like ExMormon, Religious Nonsense, Apostates of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Silliness.

But none of those took off as quickly as Anonymous Mormon Stories.

“In two days, it got 200 likes,” Wells says. As of

press time, the page has 959 likes, 1,026 followers, and many more stories have been added.

Kloey Willis, 22, submitted a story about having sex as a teen then being interviewed by the bishopric, where she was asked very sexually explicit questions. Contacted by City Weekly, Willis is now OK with sharing her story on the record.

“When I was 15, I had consensual sex my first time,” Willis says. “I wound up pregnant and told my mother. During my repentance process, the elder told me to reveal as much information about it as I could—was it foreplay, what positions were you in, did you do anything with your fingers or mouth?

My mom and dad were in the room, and I was kind of weirded out. After 15 minutes, I realized he was masturbating under the desk. He told me if I ever came forward, he’d excommunicate my family. In prior years, I was raped and molested endlessly.

The bishop blamed me for that abuse and said if I didn’t wear such tight clothes, I wouldn’t have caused the temptation. His son was the first boy to ever force himself on me.”

Willis sent her story to the anonymous page because she felt it could help others who have found themselves in similar situations, and say, “That happened to me, too.” She’s also certain that most, if not all, of the stories shared on the page are factual.

“It’s more possible for the stories to be true than not true,” she says. “And there have got to be so many more living in secrecy. I know women who are too afraid of coming forward about their husbands raping them or someone in the church taking advantage of them sexually because of the repercussions. They’re afraid of how they would

be treated, because they’ve seen it happen to their friends. It’s hard to leave a life when it’s all you’ve known.”

The anonymous page is just the latest in a rapidly growing trend of people speaking out about the church. Sites like mormonleaks.com; mormonthink.com (which brands itself as “neither an anti-Mormon site nor an LDS apologist site”); the legal site quitmormon.com, which helps church members formally file the paperwork needed to leave the church; John Dehlin’s Mormon Stories podcast; Fred Karger’s Mormon Tips site; Mike Norton’s secretly-shot YouTube videos of temple ceremonies and many others ... for Wells, it’s sort of a Great Awakening that takes a warts-and-all look at the faith that wouldn’t have been possible without the internet.

“We have a lot of people in our ex-Mormon group who have left the church and are now atheists,” Wells says. “Their whole life, they’ve been taught this is the true church, all the others are false, and they see it’s BS and they throw it away, kind of like I did.”

The pair also were inspired to start the page by Sam Young’s recent public protests against the church conducting sexually explicit interviews with young children and teens.

“We thought, why not give people an outlet, let them say what they want, give them help, build a support system so people can tell each other, ‘Hey, you’re not alone, you can get through it,’ and give them a voice to the world?” Worsley says. “I didn’t realize that so many horrible things would be posted. Not being Mormon, it’s opened my eyes to all this stuff that I had no idea people went through.”

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“When I was a teenager, the leader of the young men came up to me and asked me what time I went to sleep at night. I asked him why and he said that he knew I didn’t have blinds on my windows and wanted to watch me undress. No one was surprised when I told them, but no one did anything about it either.”

“When I was living in Provo, a former friend of mine from California had me do some work at his home. He worked for BYU during the day. I knew he and his wife well. One day when I went to the house, his wife came to the door sobbing, black eye, wearing just a robe and her garments. We went inside to talk. She told me how they had no food because he took their only car everyday to BYU (Mr. Perfect Husband) and wouldn’t buy groceries because he thought she was too fat. She was five months pregnant and the doctor reported her as being vastly underweight and might lose the baby. She also told me he wouldn’t do laundry and wore soiled garments to work. She said he would watch porn on cable TV (1990s). But the worst of it was when she told me how he raped her to have more kids (she didn’t want another child). Marital rape is real. Welcome to Utah County.”

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 15

“I was called into the bishop’s office. He told me he had been receiving multiple complaints from the young men in the ward because I had been turning down all their offers to go on dates. I explained as best I could that I ... had just gotten out of a really long, really bad relationship and I just wanted to be me.

He told me I was being incredibly selfish, and what I should be concerning myself with was what the young men wanted, and not what I wanted. He told me the other young men in the ward were looking for wives, and were ready to start families of their own, and I needed to be thinking about their needs and desires. What I wanted didn’t matter, because it was my duty to accept their date offers, get married and eventually become a mother.” CW

| CITY WEEKLY |

Stories are edited for grammar and formatting, and names of anyone being accused of wrongdoing are removed. But mostly, they are copy-and-pasted directly from email submissions.

They’re not completely anonymous because the administrators can see who they’re from, but Wells says he’s working on an app that would allow total anonymity. All they ask is that stories be as true as their memory permits. And if recounting a story is too uncomfortable, authors can always use a pseudonym.

“One person told me they didn’t believe one story, but that’s ultimately up to the reader to decide,” Worsley says. “For the most part, I don’t see any that aren’t plausible.” CW

“Over the past few years, I had come to realize how crazy this church was. I just broke away from it in February of this year. I’m 16 years old, and I’ve had five suicide attempts due to this church’s treatment throughout my childhood.

This incident and many others involving manipulation and brainwashing have traumatized me to an extent that I wish I could forget it all.”

—Anonymous Mormon Stories & Secrets co-admin Clint Worsley

“My bishop ... was an incredibly creepy guy who would hug all the young women, and would say inappropriate things like, ‘You’re very beautiful, it’s nice for us old guys to see,’ and would sit right in front of you with his knees touching yours during interviews.”

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We thought, why not give people an outlet, let them say what they want, give them help, build a support system so people can tell each other, ‘Hey, you’re not alone, you can get through it.’

“In the back seat of his car, our seminary teacher started in on the sex questions with me and my friend. We admitted to beating off. (He) asked us to record our habits. For over a year, I kept a calendar of the days I beat off (and how many times) along with my friend’s habits. A year later, (he) ended up being my sexual abuser ... Another person has also reported him as I did. The church has done nothing.”

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COURTESY PHOTO

“I was sexually abused by a well-respected neighbor at 8 years old. Unbeknownst to me, he had picked me out and set out to become a grandfatherly figure in my life. He spent several weeks grooming me before he molested me.

I didn’t even really understand what happened to me, I just knew it felt wrong and I was scared. I internalized guilt and shame for something that wasn’t my fault. I couldn’t tell anyone and instead became depressed and ran in front of cars at 9 trying to die to go home to Jesus.

It got worse when I turned 12 and at my first worthiness interview I was given a pamphlet called Chastity, in it were a couple of sentences that left me feeling worthless and dirty. Those words were, ‘If you did not fight, even unto death you had allowed your virtue to be taken.’ I thought even God did not want me. I was suicidal for years, I didn’t just want to die, I wanted annihilation, I begged in prayers to die. I had one attempt at 15 years old that should have killed me. I lied in all my worthiness interviews and then hoped that God would still honor the people I was being baptized for or doing endowments for. It took years to feel like it was OK to have boundaries.”

16 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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Lights On! At Gallivan Center

YEHIA ELZEINY

With today’s obvious hostility toward the media, and attempts by those in the upper tiers of government to marginalize the press while doing its duty, Bassem Youssef knows better than most the inherent risk to democracy that can occur as a result. Youssef—an Egyptian who began his career as a cardiac surgeon before initiating a makeshift broadcast on Facebook—eventually assumed the role of outspoken public commentator, speaking forcefully and fearlessly against his country’s repressive government. Despite continuous harassment by the authorities and threats of arrest and physical harm, he continued to call out his country’s leadership with intelligence, humor and satire, making him a genuine celebrity of sorts in the wider Arab world.

As a result, his show AlBernameg became Egypt’s most popular program of all time, attracting 30 million viewers a week. It’s little wonder that Time Magazine included him in its list of the world’s most influential individuals.

Youssef also won support from his hero, Jon Stewart, with whom he’s often compared.

Stewart himself considers Youssef a true comrade-in-arms, describing him not only as a friend, but as a kindred spirit as well.

Youssef’s one man show The Joke is Mightier Than the Sword shares truths that are especially important in today’s dangerously divided society. It expresses the importance of speaking up, even in the face of hostility and intimidation. Hopefully Youssef will take his tour to our nation’s capital. We suspect there are certain individuals there who need to heed these lessons.

(Lee Zimmerman) Bassem Youssef: The Joke Is Mightier Than the Sword @ Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, Nov. 27, 7 p.m., $5-$100, utahpresents.org

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 17

Life presents very few opportunities where a large group of people tells you, “Please come join us.” Even more rare, and precious, is when that group adds, “No really. We don’t care if you’re actually good at what we’re trying to do.”

Such is the opportunity for anyone who enjoys singing when the Utah Symphony presents its Messiah Sing-In on Nov. 24 and 25 at Abravanel Hall. This annual event on Thanksgiving weekend has become an important part of kicking off the holiday season in downtown Salt Lake City.

The instructions for how to enjoy this performance of Handel’s masterwork are pretty straightforward. 1. Show up with your vocal chords ready and a Messiah score in hand. Don’t have one? Download it on your phone or tablet— it’s in the public domain, after all—or purchase a copy when you arrive at Abravanel Hall that night. 2. Decide if you want to sing soprano, alto, tenor or bass. 3. Let ’er rip!

Besides you and a thousand other choir members, the Utah Symphony, Utah Symphony Chorus and four soloists from Utah Opera will be on hand to complete the performance. The soloists will perform some of the classic arias such as “Comfort Ye My People” and “O Thou That Tellest Good Tidings to Zion.”

When it comes time for memorable choruses such as “For Unto Us a Child is Born,” “Worthy is the Lamb” and “Hallelujah,” conductor Conner Gray Covington will turn from the orchestra to the audience, motion for everybody to stand, and cue you to take part in an amazing experience. (Geoff Griffin) Utah Symphony & Chorus: Messiah SingIn @ Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 801-355-2787, Nov. 24-25, 7:30 p.m., $14$31, utahsymphony.org

Bassem Youssef: The Joke Is Mightier Than the Sword

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TUESDAY 11/27

Utah Symphony & Chorus: Messiah Sing-In

Few things define the winter holiday season in Salt Lake City as do the lights hung up within and throughout downtown. As soon as the day threatens toward a more somber night during end-of-year months, the lights provide bright counterpoint.

On Friday, Nov. 23, the Gallivan Center will turn on its lights at the annual Lights On! celebration. Featuring music by X96’s DJ Jon Smith, face painting, the Silvermoon Taqueria food truck, Santa and ice skating performances from American Ice Theater, the event is far more than a light show. It also features a donation drive benefitting The Utah Refugee Coalition.

Toothpaste, toothbrushes, bars of soap, deodorant, feminine hygiene products, razors, toilet paper and reusable shopping products are all appreciated.

The lights, though, are the show-stealers.

Although they’re clearly visible, the extensive labor that goes into making them magical is far less so. “The holiday lights around the Gallivan Center are admired by many throughout the winter season, but people may not realize just how much hard work our maintenance team actually puts in,” Amy Nilsson, SLC Events Manager, says.

A small crew of six members installs the 350,000+ lights starting in early fall, rotating the responsibility for certain elements annually. “The team members take turns to design the light patterns—so no year is the same as the previous,” Nilsson says. “Sometimes it’s the small details that make things a little more special.” (Casey Koldewyn) Lights On! @ Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, 801-535-6110, Nov. 23, 4 p.m., free, thegallivancenter.com

SATURDAY 11/24

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“Climb up on the Moon? Of course we did. All you had to do was row out to it in a boat and, when you were underneath, prop a ladder against her and scramble up,” Qfwfq, the narrator of Italian author Italo Calvino’s short story The Distance of the Moon, says. This story provides the basis for Sackerson’s newest original play.

“The idea of a person caught between the Earth and the Moon was so intriguing for us to put on stage,” producer Dave Mortensen says.

Why this story, with its seemingly unpronounceable characters? “It’s beautiful,” playwright Morag Shepherd says. “We wanted to see how, and if, we could put it on its feet.”

The three-part hybrid combines Calvino’s original text, dialogue written by Shepherd and original choreography from Ririe-Woodbury Dance Co. performer Breeanne Saxton. “The story is set out of time and space, which is a theme that we’ve picked up on. I tried to not incorporate any anachronism that would place us in any specific time and place,” Shepherd says. “The author is … taking scientific principles and making stories out of them. In this one, he’s talking about the pull of the Moon. Consequently, we play a lot with attraction in all of its forms, gravity, and things being continually in motion, physically and mentally.”

Attend, and join a magical trip to the moon this holiday season. “It will be an event unlike any you’ve seen at The Gateway before,” Mortensen says. (Naomi Clegg) Sackerson: The Distance of the Moon @ Wasatch Theatre Co., 124 S. 400 West, Nov. 23-Dec. 22, Fridays & Saturdays, 7 p.m., 3 p.m. matinees Dec. 9, 15 & 16, $12$18, moon.sackerson.org

FRIDAY 11/23

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Sackerson: The Distance of the Moon

Complete listings online at cityweekly.net

SLCTV MEDIA

SHAWN FRANCIS SAUNDERS

FRIDAY 11/23

ENTERTAINMENT PICKS, NOV. 22-28, 2018

COURTESY UTAH SYMPHONY

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Geek Giving

BY BRYAN YOUNG comments@cityweekly.net @swankmotron

I

t’s that time of the year again when you’re scratching your head, wondering what you should get for that nerdy person in your life. They’re difficult to shop for, because their interests are, well, so bizarre. And you don’t want to spring to get them some good whiskey. So that’s where I come in: I’m here to help you shop for that particular friend or loved one.

Comics: Comics are always the easiest thing to get for people— they fit every size—and we have a number of local comic book stores that can help you pick out exactly the right one for your gift recipient’s particular interests. Black Cat Comics (2261 S. Highland Drive, blackcat-comics.com) and Dr. Volt’s Comic Connection (2043 E. 3300 South, drvolts.com) are the two biggest in the area, and their staff will help tailor a comic-reading experience based on the preferences of your loved one. Did they love Black Panther or Infinity War? There are comics to help illuminate those stories. Were they a fan of Justice League? Then the fellows at the local shops will help find some great stories from DC Comics. But they’re also experts in the independent, the weird and the esoteric. All you need to do is go in, tell them about the person you’re buying for, and they’ll give you the best recommendations.

If I were buying graphic novels as gifts this year, I’d take a hard look at The Snagglepuss Chronicles. I know that sounds weird, but the comic adaptation of the classic Hanna Barbara cartoon character is nothing short of amazing. Imagine the pink mountain lion was Truman Capote, and you’ll instantly grasp the brilliance of the comic.

The other one I’d recommend is the pair of Batman/Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comics. Since they’re crossovers between two companies and universes, they stand alone pretty well. The art is beautiful and the writing is fun. And who doesn’t love Batman or the Ninja Turtles? Combine them, and you’ve got a match made in heaven.

A Night at the Movies: As you look to buy things for the geek in your life, one thing that never goes bad is a gift certificate to see a movie. Geeks have inherited the box

SCOTT RENSHAW

A handy suggestion guide for the unapologetic nerds on your holiday shopping list.

office, and it’s hard to Action figure lineup at Megalopolis Toys keep up with the volume of movies coming out. It can take a toll on the wallet. This holiday season, the two big ones might be Aquaman and the animated Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse. Both of these movies are going to be blockbusters, and based on the trailers, the nerds in your life are going to want to see them more than once. You can help with that.

If you want to go the extra mile, order a 2019 Megatub from Megaplex Theatres (multiple locations, megaplextheatres.com) to give them. With this plastic bucket, popcorn refills are only $3, which could save them as much money as any amount of movie certificates you’re apt to get. I would order now, though. They tend to sell out fast.

Collectibles: If your loved one is in need of a rare collectible, there’s a new place in town. Megalopolis Toys (3753 S. State, megalopolis.toys) is a nationwide outfit for online orders, but they are headquartered in Salt Lake City, and every sort of nerd collectible, action figure or statue you could want, they seem to be able to get their hands on. Their showroom is chock full of these things from every universe imaginable, so you’re not going to leave emptyhanded. If your loved one has been trying to track down a toy, or even a convention exclusive, Megalopolis should be your first and last stop.

Stocking Stuffers: Stocking stuffers are always a last-minute thing to grab, and often those items get boring. You can only put so many oranges and candy canes into a stocking. So you want to make yours special, right? Well, the place to go for that is going to be Cabin Fever (556 S. 602 East, trolleysquare.com/cabin-fever) in the Trolley Square mall. This place has all kinds of tiny gifts like pins and refrigerator magnets to stuff into the stocking of any-genre fan. They also carry a range of Funko pops, gag gifts and books. This is also your white elephant gift headquarters; they have so much of the weirdest stuff for even the most bizarre sense of humor. No holiday shopping trip is complete without the random things you can find at Cabin Fever.

Hopefully this clears some things up and will make those tastefully nerdy people in your life happy this season. CW

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20 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

moreESSENTIALS

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

Current reigning Miss City Weekly, Cooper, hosts drag extravaganza “Those Bitches Give Thanks” on Wednesday, Nov. 28, at Club TryAngles (251 W. 900 South, 801-364-3203, clubtry-angles.com). Proceeds benefit the Salt Lake City Ronald McDonald House.

PERFORMANCE Friday, Dec. 7, 7:30 pm

THEATER

A Christmas Carol Hale Center Theater Orem, 225 W. 400 North, Orem, Nov. 24-Dec. 22, haletheater.org The Addams Family Musical! Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, through Nov. 24, egyptiantheatrecompany.org Afterglow Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, through Dec. 2, dates and times vary, arttix.artsaltlake.org The Distance of the Moon Wasatch Theatre Co., 124 S. 400 West, Nov. 23-Dec. 22, Fridays & Saturdays, 7 p.m., moon.sackerson.org (see p. 17) The Polar Express Peerys Egyptian Theater, 2415 Washington Boulevard, Ogden, Nov. 23, noon-2 p.m., egytiantheaterogden.com Radium Girls Margetts Theatre, 800 E. Campus Drive, Provo, through Dec. 8, dates and times vary, arts.byu.edu The Scarlet Pimpernel Hale Centre Theatre, 9900 S. Monroe St., Sandy, through Nov. 24, dates and times vary, hct.org

CLASSICAL & SYMPHONY

BYU Jazz Lab Band Madsen Recital Hall, 1 University Hill, Provo, Nov. 28, 7:30 p.m., arts.byu.edu Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in Concert Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, Nov. 28-29, 7 p.m., arttix.artsaltlake.org Lehi Junior High Handbell Ringers Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, Nov. 26, 4:30 p.m., slcpl.org Messiah Sing-In Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, Nov. 24-25, 7:30 p.m., arttix.artsaltlake.org (see p. 17) Utah Voices Christmas Concert Libby Gardner Hall, 1375 E. Presidents Circle, Nov. 23-24, 7:30 p.m., utahvoices.org

COMEDY & IMPROV

Ben Brinton: A Singer-Songwriter Comedy Improv Event Hotel RL, 161 W. 600 South, Nov. 26, 6 p.m.

Bassem Youssef: The Joke is Mightier than

the Sword Kingsbury Hall, 1395 Presidents Circle, Nov. 27, 7 p.m., tickets.utah.edu (see p. 17) Brian Posehn Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, Nov. 23-24, 7 & 9:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Shawn Paulsen Wiseguys Ogden, 269 25th St., Ogden, Nov. 23-24, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Steve Soelberg Wiseguys West Jordan, 3763 W. Center Park Drive, Nov. 23-24, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com

DANCE

The Nutcracker Browning Center, 1901 University Circle, Ogden, Nov. 23 & 24, 7 p.m.; Nov 24, 2 p.m., symphonyballet.org

LITERATURE AUTHOR APPEARANCES

John Keahey: Sicilian Splendors Weller Bookworks, 607 Trolley Square, Nov. 24, 7 p.m., wellerbookworks.com

SPECIAL EVENTS FESTIVALS & FAIRS

Christmas Village Gala and Fireworks Show Municipal Gardens, 25th St. & Grant Ave, Ogden, Nov. 24, 6 p.m., visitogden.com Christkindlmarkt This Is the Place Heritage Park, 2106 Sunnyside Ave., Nov. 28-Dec. 1, 11 a.m.-8 p.m., christkindlmarkt-slc.com Festival of Lights & Santa Smith Park, 100 E. 300 North, Centerville, Nov. 26, 6 p.m., centervilleut.net Lights On! Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, Nov. 23, 4 p.m., free, thegallivancenter.com (see p. 17) Luminaria Ashton Gardens, 3900 N. Garden Drive, Lehi, Nov. 24-Jan. 5, 5-8 p.m., thanksgivingpoint.org Santa Paws Station Park, 833 Clark Lane, Farmington, Mondays through Dec. 17, 4-8 p.m.

Simple Treasures Holiday Boutique Golden Spike Event Center, 1000 N. 1200 West, Ogden, Nov. 28-Dec. 1, 10 a.m.-8 p.m., simpletreasuresboutique.biz

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 21

moreESSENTIALS LGBTQ EVENTS

Pride Center Thanksgiving Utah Pride Center, 1380 Main St., Nov. 22, noon-3 p.m., utahpridecenter.org Those Bitches Give Thanks Club TryAngles, 251 W. 900 South, Nov. 28, 7 p.m. clubtry-angles.com (see p. 20) Viva La Diva: Once Upon a Diva Club X, 445 S. 400 West & The Art Factory, 193 W. 2100 South, thevivaladivashow.com

VISUAL ART GALLERIES & MUSEUMS

22 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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Daniel Everett: Security Questions UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, through Jan. 12, utahmoca.org Dreamscapes Kimball Art Center, 638 Park Ave., Park City, through Jan. 6, kimballartcenter.org Glass Art Show Red Butte Gardens, 300 Wakara Way, through Dec. 18, redbuttegarden.org Holiday Group Exhibition A Gallery, 1321 S. 2100 East, through Jan. 1, agalleryonline.com Jeffory Buist: Open Spaces Anderson-Foothill Branch, 1135 S. 2100 East, through Dec. 20, slcpl.org Kandace Steadman: Utah Art Reimagined Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, through Nov. 30, slcpl.org Kelly Baisley & Virginia Catherall: Sense of Place, Great Salt Lake Alice Gallery, 617 E. South Temple, through Jan. 11, visualarts.utah.gov Marisa Morรกn Jahn: Mirror / Mask Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through Dec. 9, umfa.utah.edu

100% gluten-free

paws on the patio approved! bring your doggies & have a fresh juice cocktail fri 11am-11pm, sat 10am-11pm, sun 10am-9pm | 275 S. 200 W. Salt Lake City | zestslc.com

Molly Morin: Information Density Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, through Jan. 12, utahmoca.org Naomi Owen: Unforeseen Nature Paintings Marmalade Library, 280 W. 500 North, through Nov. 30, slcpl.org Park City Collects III Kimball Art Center, 638 Park Ave., Park City, through Jan. 6, kimballartcenter.org Patrick Dean Hubbell: Equus Modern West Fine Art, 177 E. 200 South, through Nov. 30, modernwestfineart.com Paul Reynolds & Deborah Durban Finch Lane Gallery, 54 Finch Lane, through Nov. 16, saltlakearts.org Photography from the East Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, through Dec. 2, slcpl.org Ryan Perkins: Parallel Lives, Misremembered Pasts, Revelation, Heartbreak & Lore Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, through Nov. 30, slcpl.org salt 14: Yang Yongliang Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Dr., through June 2, umfa.utah.edu Seeing the Sacred Urban Arts Gallery 116 S. Rio Grande St., through Dec. 2, urbanartsgallery.org Site Lines: Recent Work by University of Utah Art Faculty Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through Jan. 6, umfa.utah.edu Statewide Annual Exhibition Rio Gallery, 300 S. Rio Grande St., through Jan. 11, heritage.utah.gov Stronger Ties Sweet Branch, 455 F St., through Dec. 22, slcpl.org Tom Judd & Kiki Gaffney: Point of View Modern West Fine Art, 177 E. 200 South, through Jan. 12, modernwestfineart.com

BEST OF UTAH Body & Mind ™

new bou issues in 2019

MEDICAL

(Entered online, postmarked or dropped off in person)

Best of Utah Body & Mind issue date FEBRUARY 1, 2019

Phone:____________________________________ E-mail:___________________________________ You will automatically be added to City Weekly‘s e-mail newsletter list, but can opt out at any time.

Send to: Best of Utah Body & Mind 2019 248 S. Main | Salt Lake City, UT 84101

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———————————— Boxing Club/Gym ———————————— Climbing Wall ———————————— Community Swimming Pool ———————————— Crossfit Gym ———————————— Fitness/Aerobics Class Instructor ———————————— Fitness Center for Older Adults ———————————— Fitness Classes ———————————— Fitness Programs for Kids ———————————— Martial Arts Instructor ———————————— Personal Trainer ———————————— Pilates Studio ———————————— Privately Operated Gym ———————————— Public/Community Recreation Center ———————————— Ski/Snowboard School ———————————— Tennis Instruction ———————————— Water Aerobics Classes ———————————— Wilderness Therapy Program ———————————— Yoga Instructor ———————————— Yoga Studio

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1) Keep it local.

2) Ballots can be filled out online at CityWeekly.net/Bodyandmind or hand-delivered by Tuesday, Dec. 26 to 248 S. Main St., Salt Lake City, 84101.

3) Only one ballot per person; don’t be sneaky.

4) You too can be a winner. Name, phone number and email address must be included in your ballot for validation and prize eligibility.

5) You must vote in at least five categories for your ballot to be counted.

| CITY WEEKLY | NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 23

MODAY, DECEMBER 17, 2018 AT MIDNIGHT MDT

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FITNESS

VOTING DEADLINE:

Acupuncture Clinic ———————————— Acupuncturist ———————————— Chiropractor ———————————— Body Work (Feldenkrais, Rolfing, Structural Integration, Movement) ———————————— Day Spa ———————————— Esthetician ———————————— Herbalist ———————————— Holistic Health Store (herbs, oils, supplements) ———————————— Holistic MD ———————————— Hypnotherapist ———————————— Life Coach ———————————— Massage Therapist ———————————— Naturopath ———————————— Psychic ———————————— Spiritual Practice ———————————— Utah-based MLM That Sells Health Products ———————————— Weight Loss Clinic ———————————— Wellness Center ———————————— Alternative Healthcare Provider (not listed above)

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Addiction Recovery Center ———————————— Back/Spine Center ———————————— Cardiologist ———————————— Community Health Clinic ———————————— Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) ———————————— Dentist ———————————— Dental Practice ———————————— Dermatologist ———————————— Family Physician ———————————— Family Practice ———————————— Gastroenterologist ———————————— Home Nursing Care ———————————— Hospice Care ———————————— Hospital ———————————— Internist ———————————— LASIK Center ———————————— Mental Health Treatment Clinic ———————————— Nurse Practitioner ———————————— Nutritionist ———————————— Ob/Gyn Provider ———————————— Oncologist ———————————— Ophthalmologist/Eye Surgeon

———————————— Optometrist ———————————— Oral Surgeon ———————————— Orthodontist ———————————— Orthopedic Clinic ———————————— Orthopedic Surgeon ———————————— Osteopathic Physician (DO) ———————————— Pain Clinic ———————————— Pediatrician ———————————— Periodontist ———————————— Physical Therapist ———————————— Physical Therapy/Rehabilitation Center ———————————— Physician Assistant ———————————— Plastic Surgeon (Cosmetic) ———————————— Plastic Surgeon (Reconstructive)` ———————————— Podiatrist ———————————— Psychiatrist ———————————— Psychotherapist/Counselor ———————————— Retirement Community ———————————— Registered Nurse ———————————— Rural Utah Medical Center ———————————— Urgent Care Facility ———————————— Women’s Health Clinic

24 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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ENRIQUE LIMÓN

BY ALEX SPRINGER comments@cityweekly.net @captainspringer

F

or many, Thanksgiving weekend is a bit like wading into a minefield. No matter what things look like on the surface, each of us has at least one relative whom we dread seeing during the holidays—the one who just can’t help but praise President Donald Trump for his admirable leadership, or the one whose accomplishments vastly outshine your own. Familial anxiety sweeps the nation this time of year, and, yes, it can be hard to deal with. Which is why pie was invented.

As this is the most common trope among extended families, let’s start here. You’re doing your part, trying to be polite as Aunt Doris asks you

This is a tricky one. You’ve likely been playing second fiddle to this asshole since birth, so there are a lot of complex feelings to untangle. It might be best to simply accept that you are awesome in your own right, you’ll never quite enjoy the same amount of praise and attention that this overachieving sibling has garnered—but that’s perfectly OK. All the same, feelings of this magnitude can only be blunted by a whopping slice of The Dodo’s Toll House Pie. It’s a warm, gooey hybrid of choco-

Nothing is quite as alienating as having to sit across the table from your creepy nephew—I’m guessing his name is Ethan. Granted, the kid probably just needs someone to listen while he talks about Fortnite, but there’s not much you can do about it when you’re at the dinner table. The problem with the creepy nephew is that he pretty much has a free pass to make others feel un-

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 25

Symptom: The Casual Nationalist Prescription: The Cubano Meat Pie ($4.25)

Symptom: The Creepy Nephew Prescription: The Old-Fashioned Buttermilk Pie ($3.79)

Symptom: The Unattainable Sibling Prescription: The Toll House Pie ($6.99)

No matter how awkward family bonding gets over the holidays, there’s always consolation in the fact that you’ve got lots of food to eat. But what if you happen to have a dietary restriction? I can’t imagine something worse than sitting through a slew of uncomfortable moments and not being able to eat the majority of the food in front of you because you’re eating gluten-free. Hell, that alone probably sparks all kinds of unwanted attention. So, here’s what you do. Order a Snack Crack pie from Heber’s June Pie—they’ll sometimes do pop-up shops in Salt Lake City, if the drive is too daunting. This is a pie whose crust is made out of a sticky sweet Chex mix and then loaded with creamy fillings. June Pie doesn’t sell pie by the slice in most cases, but since your inconsiderate relatives didn’t leave you much to eat, you have my permission to devour this pie in its entirety. Don’t even bother with a plate. Just grab a fork, plop your ass in front of the TV and stream away. You’re welcome. CW 133 N. Main, Heber, 435-503-6950, junepie.com

| CITY WEEKLY |

Thanksgiving social woes. Got a creepy nephew who stares at you while whispering to the ball python around his neck?

There’s a pie for that. White nationalist uncle? There’s a pie for that. Gluten-free in a family who thinks gluten is a God-given right? Yup. There’s even a pie for that. Brethren, let the healing begin.

Symptom: That One Relative Who’s Gluten-Free Prescription: The Snack Crack Pie ($25.00)

Once the pie starts making the rounds, you know you’ve made it. You’ve survived Uncle Hank’s bizarre discourse about the universal truths laid bare within the most recent season of Ancient Aliens. You’ve endured passive-aggressive comments about your day job, your relationships and your distinct lack of offspring. Whatever your brand of Thanksgiving horror might be, pie is the antidote—so let’s take stock of what we’re looking at this year.

Through weeks of careful study, I’ve devised a list of pies designed to counteract some of the more common

late chip cookies and pecan pie, which are two of the most comforting resources that human beings have conceived. Snag one or two slices of this excellent dessert for cases of extreme household duress.

1355 E. 2100 South, 801-486-2473, thedodorestaurant.com

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Thanksgiving table conversation got you down? Harness the healing power of pie.

comfortable. His parents have accepted the fact that he’s “just a little eccentric” which has bolstered his confidence to do weird shit at family gatherings. If he starts making obscene sculptures out of his sweet potatoes and offers to share them with you, you’re the one who has to be the bigger person and de-escalate the situation. This takes grit and mental fortitude; don’t let anyone else tell you differently. In order to remedy the psychological trauma of such an encounter, get yourself a rich slice of buttermilk pie from Penny Ann’s Café. This is a warm hug of wholesome goodness that mixes the best elements of pie with the best elements of sugar cookies. After staring into the abyss, this is the kind of flavor combo that can make your head right again.

Multiple locations, pennyannscafe.com

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Pie One On

the same questions she did last year, when a relative launches into an unprompted tirade about how immigrants are ruining America. The way you deal with this in the moment is, of course, up to you. But if you want to counteract the adverse effects of such vile hatemongering, take a trip to Fillings & Emulsions at your earliest convenience and snag this savory hand-held pie. Not only will the flavor explosion of one of the finest sandwiches on the planet make you appreciate the culinary diversity that only immigrants can give us, but, as evidenced by his multicultural staff and stellar Latin American-inspired offerings, Chef Adalberto Díaz, pictured, is a true champion of diversity.

A good meat pie that supports an immigrant-friendly business will make you feel right as rain after dealing with a relative that you can’t relate to.

1475 S. Main, 385-229-4228, fillingsandemulsions.com

AS SEEN ON “ DINERS, DRIVE-INS AND DIVES”

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26 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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Dine Like Royalty

ng

“In a perfect world, every town would have a diner just like Ruth’s”

You’re cordially invited to

20 W. 200 S. • (801) 355-3891 Open Mon-Wed: 9am-6pm Thu-Sat: 9am-9pm siegfriedsdelicatessen.com

GIFT CERTIFICATES TO UTAH’S FINEST

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The unique & authentic french experience has arrived 1617 S 900 E | 801-259-5843

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BACK BURNER

BY ALEX SPRINGER @captainspringer

Turducken Time!

The deranged turducken—a chicken stuffed inside a duck stuffed inside a turkey and roasted—is something that most of us would like to try, but would never want to attempt. If you find yourself in this camp, then check out your nearest Potbelly Sandwich Shop (2118 S. Highland Drive, Ste. 10, 801-478-9977, potbelly.com) where they’re making a sandwich out of this culinary monstrosity while supplies last. In addition to the thick slice of pressed turducken goodness, the sandwich comes with cornbread stuffing and a cranberry honey sauce. If that’s not Thanksgiving enough for you, their menu also features a pumpkin pie shake made from actual slices of pumpkin pie. We’re not sure exactly how long Potbelly can keep these shenanigans up before the law shows up to shut it down, so get there quick if you want to partake.

VOTED UTAH’S BEST SPORTS BAR! $5 Daily

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Fresh In-House Food

Specials

Gimme Some SugarBear

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When I was in high school, I had a part-time job working at the now defunct Sam Goody/Suncoast in Fashion Place Mall. The only thing that I liked about working in a mall during the holidays was when the cinnamon-roasted nut kiosk opened up and made the whole place smell like a sugar-coated yuletide dream. Thanks to SugarBear KettleKorn (facebook.com/sugarbearkettlekorn), the corridors of Trolley Square (602 S. 700 East) will be effulgent with the holiday scent of cinnamon and caramel. The local business has made quite an impression at the Downtown Farmers Market, and serves up bags of roasted nuts and trademark kettle corn for hungry holiday shoppers seven days a week from now until Jan. 1.

OPEN Monday-Sunday 11am-1am | 677 S. 200 W. SLC whylegends.com | 801.355.3598

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 27

Back Burner tips: comments@cityweekly.net

´ Sunday Brunch w/ Bloody Mary Bar ´ Full Bar with Large Selection of “ Local” Craft Beer & Spirits ´ Outdoor Patio Open ´ No Fees for Private-Event Room Reservations!

| CITY WEEKLY |

Quote of the Week: “After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relations.”

—Oscar Wilde

YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD BAR!

For those looking to dine out on turkey day: • Chabaar Beyond Thai (87 W. 7200 South, 801566-5100, asooksri.com/chabaar). Come for the Thai dinner buffet, and stay until you need to get in line for Black Friday shopping. Open 11 a.m.-9 p.m.

• Franck’s (6263 S. Holladay Blvd., 801-274-6264, francksfood.com) For those feeling fancy, Franck’s is offering a Thanksgiving prix fixe menu. Open noon-6 p.m.

• Hub & Spoke (1291 S. 1100 East, 801-4870698, hubandspokediner.com). Serving up traditional Thanksgiving fare, tableside or to go. Open 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

• Little America (500 S. Main, 801-596-5700, saltlake.littleamerica.com). The Grand Ballroom at this downtown hotel will be serving a traditional Thanksgiving buffet. Open 11 a.m.-4 p.m.

• No Name Saloon (447 Main, Park City, 435-6496667, nonamesaloon.net). One of Park City’s finest watering holes offers a free Thanksgiving buffet for anyone 21 and over—best bet for those looking for a kid-free experience. Open 10 a.m.-2 a.m., buffet starts at 2 p.m.

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Giving Thanks (For Being Open)

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28 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Java Brew

A specialty coffee lager, plus a new IPA from Salt Flats.

BY MIKE RIEDEL comments@cityweekly.net @utahbeer

B

elieve it or not, good coffee is one of the most requested care packages that servicemen and women request while on deployment; Utah’s own Alpha Coffee steps up regularly to disperse their java to those service people who crave a good cup of joe. In an attempt to help Alpha and its mission, Desert Edge has teamed up with the Cottonwood Heights-based coffee-makers to brew a special beer using this wonderful coffee.

Desert Edge Alpha Coffee Lager: Head brewer, Chad Krussell used 15 gallons of organic cold brew concentrate from Alpha Coffee in his latest creation. “A portion of the sales from this beer will go toward getting hundreds of pounds of coffee out to our men and women overseas,” Krussell explains.

I think the beer itself will blow some minds, as it doesn’t look like your typical coffee beer. It’s a slightly hazy, medium

bronzed amber color, with one skinny finger of wispy off-white head. It smells of edgy artisanal coffee, bittersweet cocoa powder, gritty and grainy pale malt and some earthy, leafy and floral green hop bitters. The taste is a bready and doughy pale malt, with a reduced cold coffee acerbic essence and some minor earthy yeastiness. Then, more subtle latte notes appear with a minor leafy, herbal and floral verdant hoppiness.

Overall: This is a rather well-made and enjoyable coffee-enhanced lager, representing both sides of the coffee/beer equation. The 4 percent ABV makes it easy to drink, and the sweetness from the malt helps take you into that cappuccino realm.

Salt Flats Slip Stream IPA: This India pale ale was one of the first “high point” beers to come out of Salt Lake City’s Salt Flats Brewing Co. It pours a deep ruby/orange color with one-to-two fingers of dense, fluffy white foam. The nose is somewhat typical for an IPA—full of grapefruit, lemon zest, orange peel, pine and toasted biscuit.

The aroma is pleasant with good balance and complex citrus/earthy hops, along with moderate bready malt notes with solid strength. The taste starts off with grapefruit and orange zest. It builds a sheet of moderate bitterness that will cover the malty bed of honey, light caramel and toasted biscuit that takes over at mid palate.

Once your tongue is used to the sweetness, pine and floral/grassy hops assert

MIKE RIEDEL

BEER NERD

themselves, keeping the grains from becoming too cloying. From here, it’s a tug of war between the bitter and sweet components until the end of the swig. The finish has lingering notes of lemon, pepper and earthy pine. You’ll find an impressive complexity and balance of citrus/earthy hops and moderate bready malt flavors, a great bittering balance and zero cloying flavors after the finish. Light dryness from bitterness increases through the glass. The carbonation and body are moderate, with a very smooth, moderately creamy/grainy/ sticky and slightly resinous, balanced, satisfying mouthfeel. The 9 percent ABV leaves you with a noticeable warmth.

Overall: This is a nice IPA with all-around solid complexity, robustness and a balance of citrus/earthy hops and moderate bready malt flavors. This one is very smooth and refreshing to drink for the style, and would make a good entry-level IPA. While it’s not too bitter, it still has decent hop complexity, with a bit more malt presence making for a nicely enjoyable offering.

The Alpha Coffee lager will only be available for a limited time at Desert Edge’s Trolley Square brewpub; Slip Stream, however, is available at the Garage Grill (1122 E. Draper Parkway), DABC stores and Salt Flat’s new brewery pub at 2098 S. Industrial Circle in Salt Lake City. As always, cheers! CW

O Y U L C AN E L A A OVER 2 T 00 ITEMS KING BUFFET CHINESE SEAFOOD | SUSHI | MONGOLIAN

L U N C H B U F F E T • D I N N E R B U F F E T • S U N D AY A L L D AY B U F F E T TEL: 801.960.9669 123 S. STATE OREM, UT

TEL: 801.969.6666 5668 S REDWOOD RD TAYLORSVILLE, UT

SINCE

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All the traditions with a few unique surprises!

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Salt Lake City Marriott University Park 480 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City 801.581.1000

11:00 AM- 6:00 PM $40/adults $20/ children 12 and under Free/ Children under 5 $20/Military Reservations available on OpenTable

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Grand Thanksgiving Buffet

20%OFF

REVIEW BITES A sample of our critic’s reviews

11:00am - 9:30pm 11:00am - 10:30pm 12:00pm - 9:00pm

3370 State Street #8 South Salt Lake, UT 801-466-8888 | Full liquor license

FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT SAKURAHIBACHISLC.COM JOSH SCHEUERMAN

Mon - Thur: Fri - Sat: Sunday:

WITH AD EXP. 11/30/18

Stop In For Some Handcrafted Grilled Cheese Goodness!

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| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Buy one get one FREE 752 W. Blue Vista Lane Midvale, Ut 84047 801-432-7906

Spedelli’s

Spedelli’s has risen like a pepperoni phoenix from the ashes following a forced relocation, which would spell the end of most local pizza joints. But while the new place is in a delivery-friendly residential area, and the interior captures the restaurant’s Fa mright ingnotes: ton laid-back, almost beach-y vibe, the biggest part of their success is the pizza. A slice of pepperoni ($3) hits allrthe a chewy, foldable crust that has just enough outer crunch to make me appreciate the pizza oven, layered with slightly tangy tomato sauce, melted cheese and then a hit of acidic heat from the slices of pepperoni. Those who are feeling a bit more punk rock about their pies will want to check out a few of Spedelli’s signature pizzas, like the Wake’N’Bake ($19-$23)—bacon and eggs plus Sriracha pizza sauce and sliced jalapeño peppers. It’s no secret that pizza is what you should get at Spedelli’s, but the fact that I can get poutine ($6), tacos (trio for $9) and pizza under one roof is a rarity that everyone should take advantage of. But I mean, come on: We’re always in the mood for pizza, right? Reviewed Nov. 1. 2991 E. 3300 South, Millcreek, 385-528-0181, spedellis.com

Cottonwood Heights 2578 Bengal Blvd.

(801)666-6918

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| CITY WEEKLY |

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VOTED BEST ITALIAN!

serving breakfast, lunch and dinner

happy thanksgiving!

@

2005 E. 2700 SOUTH, SLC FELDMANSDELI.COM FELDMANSDELI OPEN TUES - SAT TO GO ORDERS: (801) 906-0369

no dinner / no music on 11/23 | 11/24

2 01 7

COMING SOON DOWNTOWN & FARMINGTON

SICILIAMIAUTAH.COM

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net

THANK YOU FOR

Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom-and-pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves.

Caffé Molise

Inspired by Italy’s Molise region, this Italian dining restaurant features a full lunch and dinner menu with favorites, such as a variety of antipastas, pollo marsala and its bistecca—beef tenderloin marinated in Caffé Molise’s secret recipe. The restaurant moved from 100 South into the historic Eagle Building at the corner of 400 South and West Temple, giving the restaurant more room to breathe in a classic downtown location.

When you’re done with the main course, hit up Molise’s dessert menu for some scumptious chocolate hazelnut mousse cake or crème brûlée. 404 S. West Temple, 801-364-8833, caffemolise.com

VOTING US

UTAH’S BEST BURGER!

Greek Souvlaki

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| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

A perennial City Weekly Best of Utah winner, Greek Souvlaki was developing a following long before the inception of the awards. The doors to the first location were opened in 1972 by Lee and Mary Paulos, and they served just three items: gyros, souvlaki and beefteki. The business has since expanded to five locations and has stayed true to the Paulos’ vision of serving high-quality Greek cuisine to Salt Lakers. Multiple locations, greeksouvlaki.com

Tulie Bakery

2015

2016

2017

| MUSIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS |

There are myriad reasons to visit either of Tulie Bakery’s locations. From their effortlessly hip interior design to their locally sourced ingredients, it’s one of Salt Lake’s coolest bakeries. Owner/self-taught pastry czar Leslie Seggar knows exactly what’s she’s doing on every level—from croissants to hot-pressed sandwiches. Seggar’s gourmet pastries feature only the finest ingredients, and the treats are enhanced by the store’s layout, right down to communal tables that create a warm and contemporary environment. The sticky buns are out of this world. 863 E. 700 South, 801-883-9741; 1510 S. 1500 East, 801-4104217, tuliebakery.com

The Rock Stop

| CITY WEEKLY |

LUCKY13SLC.COM

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 31

Across the street from the Maynard Dixon Museum, just outside the sleepy burg of Orderville, is the most eclectic coffee house down south. The nearly 50-yearold Rock Stop is actually built in the shape of a rock out of chicken wire, paper, plaster and fiberglass. It’s owned and run by Mickey and Don Davis, who will happily regale you with their tale of leaving corporate life in Las Vegas for the delights of a quieter existence in Southern Utah. While it’s main business is selling a vast array of jewelry and local stones—some refined, others just chunks—it’s the coffee and location that calls patrons back. Purchase a latte inside or their specialty, an espresso sundae, and sit in its small, gazebolike patio, you can take in the marvels of green, rolling hills, red rock and huge skies that inspired Dixon to paint his great works. What more could you ask? 385 W. State, Orderville, 435-648-2747, therockstoputah.com

801-590-9940 | facebook.com/theroyalslc

www.theroyalslc.com

 Bar | Nightclub | Music | Sports 

CHECK OUT OUR GREAT menu nfl football

nfl jersey giveaways every sunday monday & thursday great food & drink specials

watch all the games here

WEDNEsday 11/21

Live Music

Funk & Gonzo Green Leefs Newborn Slaves Live Music

friDAY 11/23

EARTHKRY

w/ special guess

SMILING SOULS SATURDAY 11/24

Live Music

riddled with the penitent man rythym nation TUESDAY 11/27

Ivouries make their mark from Salt Lake City to China.

BY KARA RHODES comments@cityweekly.net @karadrhodes

L

ocal bands abound, but it’s rare to stumble across an excellent one whose drummer you had a crush on back in your Snow College days. Originally formed from guitarist/vocalist Jaxon Garrick’s solo project, the full Ivouries band now includes Casey Schrader (bass guitar), Adam Fuller (keyboard/synths) and Devin Mitchell (drums/samples), all of whom met at different times in their lives.

Their raw emo-pop sound sets Ivouries apart in Utah’s crowded local scene. The band members call their genre “gothy pop,” with Fuller adding context to the catchy categorization: “Ivouries is dark and energetically raw,” he says. “It’s a blend of mysterious luxury and pop sensibilities. Our sound heavily relies on synths, drum samples and production experiments.” Fuller says that Ivouries’ biggest influences include The Cure, Aphex Twin, New Order, Travis Scott, Mitski, Frank Ocean, Brian Eno, Joji, Cindy Lauper and Beach Fossils.

With that unique sound comes a unique band name, originally chosen by Garrick. “I thought it looked beautiful,” he says. “I loved how the letters looked together—like it could be on the cover of Esquire or something and fit in phonetically and aesthetically.” Ivouries haven’t made the front page of any glossy mags yet, but they have gone international faster than other local bands: They recently returned from a large international festival in Qingdao, China.

Jay Warren

open mic night

YOU Never KNow WHO WILL SHOW UP TO PERFORM

coming soon 11/29 11/30

12/13

EUREKA AND TRIUMPHANT Roxshow THE ULIMATE JOURNEY AND BON JOVI TRIBUTE

hirie

ISAAC VAN WAGONER

4760 S 900 E, SLC

Mysterious Luxury

Left to right: Devin Mitchell, Jaxon Garrick, Casey Schrader and Adam Fuller of Ivouries While playing with another band at the same festival in 2017, Garrick pushed his own music and got Ivouries a gig for 2018.

“China was bonkers in the best possible way,” Mitchell explains.

“So many amazing people and unforgettable experiences. That festival was astronomically beneficial to our band. We had never played for that many people or on a stage that large before, so the first couple days were a bit of a shock. But by the end, we were all pretty comfortable and confident as a group. Our newly acquired fan base there was amazing, too.”

Ivouries plan to tour the Midwest as well as the West Coast in 2019, then return to China once more. Until then, they’re excited to play a hometown show on Nov. 24 at Kilby Court, their unanimous vote for favorite loca venue. “We have a lot of support in SLC, for which we are very grateful,” Fuller says. “Lots of friends and fans are also musicians and artists, and we try to support our friends and their art. The music community is growing and changing all the time, and we try to exist and participate in that community.

We also have a decent reach online and are always trying to spread our presence to new people.”

Opening the show on Nov. 24 are fellow locals Jay Warren and Idan Jene, who Garrick believes are integral parts of that local community. “Jay Warren is incredible,” he says. “He’s an amazing singer and songwriter—I can’t believe he’s in Utah. He deserves all the acclaim he gets. He’s a world-class artist.” Garrick raves about Idan Jean as well, who he describes as next level. “Watching Idan live is unlike anything I’ve heard or seen before,” Garrick says.

“He really takes you places with his stuff.”

Ivouries’ new single, “What Did I Say,” debuted on Nov. 9 on Spotify, YouTube, Soundcloud and iTunes, reflecting the band’s push for bigger success. “Ivouries is going all the way,” Schrader says. “We are all excited to keep making music for years to come.

We’ve already had such amazing experiences and have connected with a lot of people, so we are driven to keep that going.” CW

IVOURIES

 Bar | Nightclub | Music | Sports  ALL SHOW TICKETS AVAILABLE AT SMITHSTIX OR AT THE ROYAL

HALEY CONLEY

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32 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

MUSIC

CONCERT PREVIEW

w/ Jay Warren, Idan Jene Saturday, Nov. 24, 7 p.m.

Kilby Court 741 S. Kilby Court Tickets: $7, all ages kilbycourt.com

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 33

BY ISAAC BIEHL, RACHELLE FERNANDEZ & NICK McGREGOR

FRIDAY 11/23 SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 24

KIRK DATH

9PM - NO COVER football

U

swag giveaway SATURDAY, NOV 24 Utah vs. BYU @ 8:00 pm

free game boards for prizes MNF NOV 26 TENNESSEE @ HOUSTON

@ 6:15 PM

SUNDAYS & THURSDAYS & SATURDAYS

WASATCH POKER TOUR @ 8PM BONUS: SAT @ 2PM MONDAYS

STARTS @ 9PM

FREE TO PLAY ENTER TO WIN CASH & PRIZES

Ministry, Carpenter Brut, Natas Lived

For decades, war has served as a contentious topic in the metal community. Bands like Anthrax and Five Finger Death Punch have publicly voiced their support for troops in combat, while other bands like Otep and Black Sabbath criticized those in power.

Some musicians play it safe and avoid writing politically charged content altogether, but Chicago industrial metal pioneers Ministry are no one’s puppet. During the 2008 election, Ministry worked with moveon.org to help register 50,000 new voters. Earlier this year, the band continued that same movement with headcount.org in support of their 14th studio album, AmeriKKKant. Ministry’s frontman and last original member “Uncle” Al Jourgensen has never come up short of words to lambast former President George W. Bush and current President Donald Trump. “Trump is just really emblematic of a much bigger problem,” Jourgensen told House of Strombo in an April interview. “This album provides FEMA-type relief for the devastation ‘Hurricane Cheeto’ has brought upon us.” The tragic passing of guitarist Mike Scaccia sparked rumors of the end of Ministry (again), but Trump’s election lit Jourgensen up like a blowtorch. The 30th anniversary of landmark Ministry album Land of Rape and Honey also re-energized the band, with bassist Paul Barker joining Jourgensen for the first time in 15 years to celebrate it in a whirlwind media tour. Whether they’re looking backward or forward, one thing’s for sure: Ministry is here to make America think again.

(Rachelle Fernandez) The Depot 13 N. 400 West, 6:30 p.m., $35 presale; $40 day of show, 21+, depotslc.com

Trippie Redd

$1,300 CASH!

TUESDAYS

FUNKIN’ FRIDAY

DJ RUDE BOY BAD BOY BRIAN

PHIL PARMET

JOHNNYSONSECOND.COM

Trippie Redd, Saweetie, Flipp Dinero, DaniLeigh

Whether you like to spend the morning after Thanksgiving in a mad scramble for shopping deals, or you prefer to treat the day as a sleepy reprieve, don’t miss the chance to kick the holiday season into overdrive with U92’s Toyota Jingle Jam Night 1. Headlining is controversial Atlanta-via-Ohio rapper Trippie Redd, whose first single, 2017’s “Love Scars,” reached tens of millions of fans via streaming platforms. Full-length debut Life’s a Trip came out in August, featuring collaborations from Lil Wayne and Erykah Badu, but its success was mitigated by Trippie’s many feuds. The red-dreaded, face-tatted MC blamed 6ix9ine for having inappropriate sexual relations with minors, defended late rapper XXXTentacion against allegations of domestic abuse and was accused of including a Satanic ritual in the video for his song “Topanga.” But Trippie— whose latest single “Dark Knight Dummo” with Travis Scott is a searing, horror-inspired testament to the pitfalls of success—believes all of that is just noise. As he told Hot New Hip Hop earlier this year, “Timeless music is a concept I can live on.” Not bad coming from a fast-rising rapper who isn’t even 20 years old yet. (Nick McGregor) The Complex, 536 W. 100 South, 7 p.m., $34.50, all ages, thecomplexslc.com

TUESDAY 11/27

Echo & The Bunnymen, Enation

165 E 200 S SLC 801.746.3334

IMRAN MALIK

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34 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

LIVE

THIS WEEK’S MUSIC PICKS

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Many consider these English post-punk legends a cult band with limited reach. But Echo & The Bunnymen have spent their entire 40-year career proving people wrong.

Ministry When Ian McCulloch originally started the band in Liverpool with Will Sergeant and Les Pattinson, they committed the rock ’n’ roll heresy of using a drum machine. When they toured the U.S. for the first time, Sergeant told a reporter that he hated the country and wanted to return home. When 1984’s Ocean Rain was released, McCulloch claimed it was “the greatest album ever made,” adding about its lead single “The Killing Moon,” “There isn’t a band in the world who’s got a song anywhere near that.” When McCulloch acrimoniously split from the band in 1988 and drummer Pete de Freitas died in a motorcycle accident in 1989, critics said Echo & The Bunnymen were doomed.

But they reunited in 1997, long before such an act was considered holier than thou by Internet-fueled “cult band” fans. Seven solid full-lengths (including 2018’s The Stars, The Oceans & The Moon) and several successful compilations later, these unlikely heroes are still at it, recently touring with alt-folk icons Violent Femmes and embarking on a headlining U.S. jaunt of their own. Lucky for us, McCulloch is still as ornery as ever, too: In an October interview with XSNoize, he went easy on U2’s Bono, a target of his wrath over the years, but buried his spears into Stewart Copeland of The Police, calling him a “twat” and a “fuckwit” who, “in any civilized world would be shot to death by firing squad or by two firing squads in case the first lot missed him. He’s just one annoying bastard.” We love you, Ian! (NM) The Union Event Center, 235 N. 500 West, 8 p.m., 21+, $32.50, theunioneventcenter.com

SATURDAY & SUNDAY BRUNCH, MIMOSA, AND MARY AMAZING $8 LUNCH EVERY WEEKDAY! NEW MENU ADDITIONS! THURSDAY: Closed - Enjoy the Holiday!

FRIDAY:

DJ Sneeky Long @ 9:00 pm.

SATURDAY:

DJ Soul Pause @ 9:00 pm.

SUNDAY:

Sleep in! Brunch served ALL DAY!!

Breaking Bingo @ 9:00 Pot $700

MONDAY:

Micro Brew Pint Special Geeks Who Drink Trivia @ 7:00!

TUESDAY:

Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck! @ 9:00

WEDNESDAY:

VJ BIRDMAN @ 10:00pm

32 EXCHANGE PLACE • 801-322-3200

WWW.TWISTSLC.COM • 11:00AM - 1:00AM

S P IR ITS . FO OD . LOCAL B EER 11.23

PIXIE & THE PARTYGRASS BOYS

11.24 BILL BITNER EXPERIMENT

11.30 SIX FEET IN THE PINE

12.01 RIDING GRAVITY

ALL UTAH GAMES

Next Home Game @8PM THE TEAM

NOV 24 UTAH VS DOWN SOUTH

LUMPY’S BUS!

nfl GAMES

MNF Tennessee @ Houston@ 6:15 3000 S Highland Dr, Salt Lake City, UT 84106 801.484.5597 | Lumpysbar.com

W/ CHRISTIAN MILLS BAND

3200 E BIG COTTONWOOD ROAD 801.733.5567 | THEHOGWALLOW.COM

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 35

TNF Chicago @ Detroit @ 10:30 Washington @ Dallas @ 2:30 Atlanta @ New Orleans @ 6:20

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ALL

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11.28 SIMPLY B

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HIGHLAND

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AS ALWAYS, NO COVER!

21

NOVEMBER

PLAY GEEKS WHO DRINK TRIVIA AT 6:30

FOLLOWED BY BREAKING BINGO AT 8:30 ($3,650 on the pot)

WED LIVE MUSIC AT 1 0PM WITH LANE CHANGERS PLAYING

GRACIE’S 9TH ANNUAL THANKSGIVING EVE UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER PARTY TO BENEFIT THE CHRISTMAS HOUSE. NO COVER. BRING DONATIONS. GOING

THANKSGIVING 22 HAPPY open @ 6 pm 23 24 25 26 27 THURS

GOING

JACK MCKAIN

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36 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

LIVE

DINNER AND A SHOW. ONLY AT

FUNKY FRIDAY WITH DJ GODINA 10PM

FRI

GOING

Kasbo

Kasbo, Vancouver Sleep Clinic, ford.

SAT

SATURDAY BRUNCH 10-3 FOOTBALL UTAH VS BYU 8PM DJ CHASEONE2 1 0PM

GOING

SUN

SUNDAY BRUNCH 10-3 NFL SUNDAY TICKET SUNDAY NIGHT BLUES JAM WITH NICK GRECO AND BLUES ON FIRST 10PM

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MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL - TENNESSEE @ HOUSTON 6:15PM

MON

MONDAY NIGHT JAZZ SESSION WITH DAVID HALLIDAY AND THE JVQ AFTER THE GAME

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TUES

EVERY TUESDAY NIGHT TUESDAY NIGHT BLUEGRASS JAM WITH PIXIE AND THE PARTYGRASS BOYS 7PM-10PM

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$3 Miller Lite & Bud Light Imperial Pints Sunday & Monday

Enjoy APPY HOUR 1/2 off appetizers every day 3pm-5pm & 10pm-midnight. *Dine-In Only

OPEN 365 DAYS A YEAR 326 S. West Temple • Open 11-2am, M-F 10-2am Sat & Sun • graciesslc.com • 801-819-7565

There’s an art to reading the energy in a room. Knowing and understanding that mood is one thing—being able to shape an audience’s feelings with energy built from scratch is a totally different animal.

With performances at Coachella, Electric Forest and Red Rocks behind him, Swedish producer Kasbo is learning how to master that exact skill. The artist born Carl Gasbo is, at 23 years old, already an elite player on the EDM scene. His debut album, Places We Don’t Know, comprises 13 tracks of chillwave-grounded anthems that dig deep on multiple levels. Kasbo throws intimacy and house beats together in a way that allows the music to creep up and latch on to your heart. Along for the ride is Australiaborn Tim Bettinson, who brings his act Vancouver Sleep Clinic to the stage. With two EPs (Therapy Phase 01 and 02) out this year, Vancouver Sleep Clinic returns to putting out music independently, the way Bettinson likes it, after a long and tedious label battle. Both projects are haunting and dreamy, perfectly spacious and ambient to anchor the show. Opening up the night is Utah’s very own ford. Prepare to lose yourself in the lush atmosphere all three artists will create. (Isaac Biehl) Soundwell, 149 W. 200 South, 7 p.m., $20, 21+, soundwellslc.com

WEDNESDAY 11/28

John Maus, Conquer Monster, Muzzle Tung

This Minnesota-based multi-hyphenate looks like a professor, sings like a basso profundo and performs like a banshee, cutting his icy synth-pop with cathartic fire. On record, Maus produces what could easily be called thinking man’s nihilism; Pitchfork once called him “the Niles Crane of the avant-garde,” sending Frasier fans into fits. But on stage, Maus conjures up some primal beast, sweating, strutting and pumping his fists to the astonishment of new fans and the adoration of old ones. His latest albums, 2017’s Screen Memories and its 2018 companion piece Addendum, feature hand-built synthesizers and punk philosophy, but there’s a dark strain of comedy that runs through Maus’ music, too. Some cheekily call his work “goth-pop”; others hail it as a retrofuturist masterpiece, all the rarities collections and box sets adding up to a discography that one day will be as challenging and rich as Lou Reed’s. For Maus, what he does is part and parcel of the great American tradition of tweaking pop music to fit new norms: “Somehow all these disparate micro-genres and classifications go back to a single thought in the context of history,” he told Spin last October. “The best stuff seems to happen when people try to follow the contradictions of what they’re already given through to their breaking point.” (NM) The Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 8 p.m., $16 presale; $18 day of show, 21+, theurbanloungeslc.com

DAILY ENTERTAINMENT THURS, NOVEMBER 22 THANKSGIVING DINNER OPEN @ 4PM COMING SOON NOVEMBER 30 FOLK HOGAN

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 24 DJ LATU UTAH VS

BYU The Holy War 8pm

GREAT FOOD

WEEKNIGHTS

$5.99 LUNCH SPECIAL

MONDAYS

MONDAY - FRIDAY

$12 SUNDAY FUNDAY BRUNCH

$3 BLOODY MARYS & $3 MIMOSAS FROM 10AM-2PM

OUR FAMOUS OPEN BLUES JAM WITH WEST TEMPLE TAILDRAGGERS THURSDAYS

$5 STEAK NIGHT @ 5PM KARAOKE W/ DJ BEKSTER 9PM

EVERY SUNDAY

~BLACK FRIDAY BRUNCH~ BLOODY MARY BAR $1 MIMOSAS!

ADULT TRIVIA 7PM 801-532-7441 • HOURS: 11AM - 2AM

THEGREENPIGPUB.COM

PIPERDOWNPUB.COM

SAD STATE OF SOCIETY W/ VERSION TWO & THE RETOXICANTS

Saturday, Nov. 24th

NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 37

7 EAST 4800 S. (1 BLOCK WEST OF STATE ST.) MURRAY 801-266-2127 • OPEN 11AM WEEKDAYS - 10 AM WEEKENDS

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kitchen open until midnight

GRAND THEFT AUDIO

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Friday, Nov. 23rd

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31 east 400 SOuth • SLC

WEDNESDAY 11/28

CONCERTS & CLUBS

38 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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AJ GARCES

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Street Sects, Portal to the God Damn Blood Dimension, Torture Porn

Calendar Release party january 12th pre-order your 2019 calendar now!

FRIDAY STEAK DINNER SPECIAL 10 OZ + SIDE ONLY $6.00!

Austin, Texas-based duo Street Sects attracts many labels: industrial punk, hardcore noise, experimental rock—even plunderphonics, which denotes the alteration of existing audio recordings to make a new composition. But the best way to describe the band’s aesthetic is with a film term: “noir.”

For Leo Ashline and Shaun Ringsmuth, darkness reigns in every direction, from the graphic covers of their three releases—2016’s End Position, 2017’s Rat Jacket and 2018’s The Kicking Mule—to the terror induced by their body-punishing, fog-laden live shows. Flexing their muscles with brutally loud instrumentation and strained, often screamed, lyrics, Street Sects go hard. Yet The Kicking Mule represents a more nuanced step forward for the band: refined melodies, slightly clearer vocals that highlight Ashline’s struggles with addiction and recovery, and well-structured songs that feed into a conceptual whole. On this tour, Street Sects will add a third member on guitar for the first time ever, rounding out the intensity of the band’s performances. Asked about what propels them to put their bodies, their voices and their eardrums on the line each night, Ashline says, “The last thing we want is to let anyone walk out of the venue feeling underwhelmed—even if it’s only for a handful of people who give a shit enough to come out.” (Nick McGregor) Diabolical Records, 238 S. Edison St., 8 p.m., $10, all ages, facebook.com/diabolicalslc

RANDY'S RECORD SHOP VINYL RECORDS NEW & USED CD’s, 45’s, Cassettes, Turntables & Speakers

Cash Paid for Resellable Vinyl, CD’s & Stereo Equipment “UTAH’S LONGEST RUNNING INDIE RECORD STORE” SINCE 1978

TUE – FRI 11AM TO 7PM • SAT 10AM TO 6PM • CLOSED SUN & MON LIKE US ON OR VISIT WWW.RANDYSRECORDS.COM • 801.532.4413

over 25 beers available

NEW HIMALAYAN PUB FUSION SMALL PLATES MENU

15 years running KARAOKE THAT DOESN’T SUCK EVERY THURSDAY W/ MIKEY DANGER

921 S. 300 W SLC | 801.363.2871 |

DANCE MUSIC ON FRIDAY & SATURDAY

SAT & SUN BRUNCH 11AM TO 3PM

CHAKRALOUNGE.NET OPEN NIGHTLY 364 S STATE ST. SALT LAKE CITY 5 PM - 1 AM

TUESDAYS 9PM BREAKING BINGO

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Happy Hour Thurs - Fri • 4 - 6 pm Free appetizers with purchase

2106 W. North Temple.

Salt Lake City, Utah

801-741-1188

Exotic burgers!

10% off for military, firefighters and law enforcement

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 39

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40 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

FILLING STATION

RACHELLE FERNANDEZ

BAR FLY

THURSDAY 11/22 DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Dueling Pianos (The Spur) Re:fine feat. DJ Dolph (Downstairs) Synthpop + Darkwave + Industrial + Goth w/ DJ Camille (Area 51)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Burly-Oke (Prohibition) Cowboy Karaoke (The Cabin) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Live Band Karaoke (Club 90) Thanksgiving Karaoke (Harp and Hound)

FRIDAY 11/23 LIVE MUSIC

The 5th Annual Black Friday Show feat. One Foundation (Urban Lounge) Band on the Moon (The Spur) Bill N’ Diane (Lighthouse Lounge) Bl_ank + Lube (Diabolical Records) Celtic Thunder (Eccles Theater) Che Zuro (Harp and Hound) Christian Mills Band (HandleBar) Earthkry (The Royal) Fox Bros Band (The Westerner) Haken + Leprous + Bent Knee (Metro Music Hall) Harry Lee + Back Alley Blues Band (Garage on Beck) John-Ross Boyce + Temples (ABG’s) Ministry + Carpenter Brut + Natas Lived (The Depot) see p. 34 Pixie & The Partygrass Boys (Hog Wallow) Quinn Brown Project (Brewskis) Rick Gerber (The Yes Hell) Sad State of Society + Version Two + Retoxicants (Ice Haüs)

Slim Chance & His Psychobilly Playboys (Scorez S. Bar) Spot & Waldo (Outlaw Saloon) Sweet Honey in the Rock (Eccles Theater) Trippie Redd + Saweetie + Flipp Dinero + DaniLeigh (The Complex) see p. 34 Uvluv + MLH + Thomas Jaques (Kilby Court) Waterparks + I Don’t Know How But They Found Me + Nick Gray + Super Whatevr + De’Wayne Jackson (The Complex) Will Baxter Band (Lake Effect)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

All-Request Gothic + Industrial + EBM + and Dark Wave w/ DJ Vision (Area 51) DJ Chaseone2 (Lake Effect) DJ HuEx (The Red Door) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) Dueling Pianos feat. Troy + Drew + Dave (Tavernacle) Funkin’ Friday w/ DJ Rude Boy & Bad Boy Brian (Johnny’s on Second) IAMA Open Mic Hosted by Carla and Dan Ekelen (South Valley Universalist Church) Lavelle Dupree (Downstairs) New Wave 80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51) Top 40 All-Request w/ DJ Wees (Area 51) Z&Z: The Blackout Party (Sky)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Cheers to You SLC) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge)

SATURDAY 11/24 LIVE MUSIC

Motorcycles roar past this corner joint that sits on Magna’s historic Main Street. Devinn, Filling Station’s manager, greets me at the door, asking whether I’ve come to invest in poker night, or just to watch on the sidelines as others win.

Sunday’s poker tourney is hosted by All In Son, and Texas Hold ’Em is the game. Looking around, I notice as many women as men, all sipping their steins full of craft beer while chattering across the bar as Devinn tells the patrons about her night. I introduce myself to Hawlii Allinson, the founder of All In Son, and try my hand at some Hold ’Em. “Respect yourself, respect others, respect the bar and have fun,” Hawlii says as she gives me a rundown of the game. I couldn’t help but notice the positivity she carried for women in the gaming industry. “Right now, [All In Son] is the only female-run poker tour in Salt Lake City,” Hawlii tells me.

The deck is shuffled and reshuffled as I sip my Kiitos Coffee Cream Ale, and as I slowly run out of chips, my attention is drawn toward a gentleman wearing an American flag jacket.

Austin, an Army veteran, posts up at the poker table with his support dog, Huey, by his feet. Huey has become the bar’s unofficial mascot, and though Lady Luck wasn’t on my side tonight, to me, Filling Station represents the true spirit of the west side. (Rachelle Fernandez) Filling Station, 8987 W. 2700 South, Magna, 801-996-8343

Alicia Stockman + Lounge 40 (Lake Effect) Bollywood Club Invasion feat. DJ Abraham (Urban Lounge) Brothers Brimm (Hog Wallow Pub) Carrie Myers (Harp and Hound) Dan Walker Blues Band (Garage on Beck) Eagle Twin + Ditch and the Delta + No Sun (The Beehive) Gagged feat. Street Fever (Metro Music Hall) Grand Theft Audio (Ice Haüs) Ivouries + Jay Warren + Idan Jene (Kilby Court) see p. 32 Kirk Dath (Johnny’s on Second) Le Youth (Soundwell) Metal Dogs (Brewskis) Mothersound + Sentinels + Degrader + Echo Muse + Simulation Thesis + Away at Lakeside (The Loading Dock) Ol’ Fashion Depot (Lighthouse Lounge) Rick Gerber (HandleBar) Riddled With + The Penitent Man + Rhythm Nation (The Royal) Silver Strike (The Spur) Spazmatics (Liquid Joe’s) Spot & Waldo (Outlaw Saloon) Tim Daniels Band (Park City Mountain) Unearth + Fit for an Autopsy + The Agony Scene + I Am + Separation of Self (The Complex)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Chris Masterson (Downstairs) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) DJ Latu (The Green Pig) DJ Mr. Ramirez (Lake Effect) Dueling Pianos feat. Troy + Drew + Dave (Tavernacle) Gothic + Industrial + Dark 80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51) Sky Saturdays w/ DJ Kaos (Sky)

Top 40+ EDM + Alternative w/ DJ Twitch (Area 51)

KARAOKE

Areaoke DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke w/ B-RAD (Club 90)

SUNDAY 11/25 LIVE MUSIC

Nathan Spenser Revue (Garage on Beck) Rahz + Benjamin Major + Nostalgic ’90s + IsaacWYD + Cotes + Lobo (Kilby Court) Mark Dee (Lighthouse Lounge) Patrick Ryan (The Spur) Live Bluegrass (Club 90)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Dueling Pianos (The Spur) Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue)

MONDAY 11/26 LIVE MUSIC

King Cuhvee + T-James + Zen Lunatics + Original Smoke Eazy(Kilby Court) Mitch Olsen Trio (Lake Effect) Amanda Johnson (The Spur)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Monday Night Open Jazz Session w/ David Halliday & the JVQ (Gracie’s) Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig) Open Blues Jam & More Jam (Hog Wallow Pub)

CONCERTS & CLUBS COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE AT CITYWEEKLY.NET Open Mic (The Cabin)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Poplar Street Pub) Karaoke Bingo (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke (Cheers To You)

TUESDAY 11/27 LIVE MUSIC

Echo & The Bunnymen (The Union Event Center) see p. 34 Glume + Black Magnet (Gold Blood Collective) Kasbo + Vancouver Sleep Clinic + ford.

(Soundwell) see p. 36 Monthly Acoustic Showcase (Velour) Riley McDonald (The Spur) Ryan Innes (Lake Effect) The Body + Author & Punisher + 2-Headed Whale (Urban Lounge) Whitechapel + Chelsea Grin + Ocean + + Slaughter to Prevail + A Traitor’s Last Breath (The Depot)

Burlesque and the Blues (Prohibition) Locals Lounge (The Cabin) Open Jazz Jam (Bourbon House) Open Mic (The Wall at BYU) Open Mic (The Royal)

Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Thom (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck (Twist) Karaoke w/ Zim Zam Ent. (Club 90)

WEDNESDAY 11/28

CHECK OUT ALL OF OUR UPCOMING EVENTS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET/EVENTS

11.15.18 @ THE BEST OF UTAH PARTY

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Dark NRG w/ DJ Nyx (Area 51) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Energi Wednesday feat. Quix (Sky) Industry Night (Downstairs) Open Mic (Velour) Roaring Wednesdays - Swing Dance Lessons (Prohibition) Top 40 All-Request w/ DJ Wees (Area 51)

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KARAOKE

Alec Benjamin (Kilby Court) Eve 6 + Somme + Pretty Nails (The Complex) John Maus + Conquer Monster + Muzzle Tung (Urban Lounge) see p. 36 The Last Ten Seconds of Life + Vale of Pnath + Threar + Wulf Blitzer + Winter Light (The Loading Dock) Live Jazz (Club 90) Marmalade Chill (Gracie’s) Novo Amor (The Commonwealth Room) Ol’ Fashion Depot + Lovely Noughts + Michelle Moonshine (Metro Music Hall) Pale Waves + Kailee Morgue + The Candescents (In the Venue) Shannon Runyon (The Spur) Simply B (Hog Wallow) Street Sects + Portal to the God Damn Blood Dimension + Torture Porn (Diabolical Records) see p. 38 Talia Keys (Lake Effect)

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 41

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42 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

CINEMA

FILM REVIEW

Browser History

Ralph Breaks the Internet keeps reminding us of its place in our own world.

WALT DISNEY ANIMATION STUDIOS

BY SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

W

hen contemporary animated features create fantasy worlds, they want those worlds to interact with our understanding of our own world—and whatever benefits accompany that choice, it comes with some baggage as well. From Monsters, Inc.’s Monstropolis and the anthropomorphized mindscape of Inside Out to the animal-populated world of Zootopia and the digital landscape of the new Ralph Breaks the Internet, we’re fed a steady diet of referential punch lines as a kind of comfort food, making that world feel more familiar in its connections to our own: “They’re so slow at the DMV, amiright?”

The flipside of that approach is an impediment to immersion, because we’re repeatedly getting reminders that the movie’s world exists only in relation to our own. Sometimes, the distraction is minor bordering on irrelevant. And sometimes, it makes it hard to latch on to whatever the movie is trying to say.

Ralph Breaks the Internet, as the title would suggest, moves from Wreck-It Ralph’s self-contained world of video arcade games to the World Wide Web—and in so doing, offers the promise of doing more than regurgitating the plot of the original with new jokes.

Six years of actual time has passed since the events of the first film, and the friendship between Ralph (John C. Reilly) and Vanellope (Sarah Silverman) has grown to be one of the most important things in both of their existences. So when a user breaks the steering wheel on Vanellope’s Sugar Rush game— which means it would be unplugged, leaving Vanellope homeless—Ralph sets out to find a replacement part in the mysterious world of the internet.

Naturally, that means encountering characters and situations built on our understanding of the way the online universe

works, and quite a few of them land their gags. Alan Tudyk voices a search engine called KnowsMore that’s perpetually jumping the gun on auto-filling information requests; Taraji P. Henson plays social-media influencer Yesss, with a savvy awareness for how to get users’ attention; an uncredited Bill Hader captures the neediness of a personified pop-up ad called Spamley.

The returning creative team of co-writers/ co-directors Rich Moore and Phil Johnston might go for some obvious ways to present a concept visually—it’s no creative brainstorm to turn the “dark web” into a shadowy back-alley—but they keep the story clipping along in a way that doesn’t make 112 minutes feel like 112 minutes.

They also find a solid character hook in Ralph’s growing fear that he might lose Vanellope when she discovers new challenges in an edgy racing game called Slaughter Race, and a new pal in its super-cool heroine (voiced by Gal Gadot). Reilly’s voice performance carries over the insecurities that drove Ralph in the original film, and the notion of allowing people to have their own opinions and lives—which gets a wonderful visual representation in a monstrous version of Ralph that’s all roiling, unthinking desperation—certainly clicks in a movie set in the often-toxic online world.

The problem is that this central concept is also related to Vanellope’s growing desire to find new challenges beyond the familiar ones of her own game—and it’s kind of hard to take that idea seriously in a franchise sequel, from the company that has spent most of the past

Ralph, Yesss and Vanellope in Ralph Breaks the Internet

five years doing nothing but cannibalizing its own back-catalog for familiar, easy-to-market characters. Here’s where reminding us of our own world collides with the movie’s own story: Don’t try to sell me the importance of taking risks in new places, if it’s in this particular package.

That notion comes home to roost even more awkwardly in the sequence that has been at the center of the film’s marketing: Vanellope’s encounter with the entire lineup of Disney princesses, within the greater online Disney world. Some of the jokey references are cute, and Vanellope even gets a chance for her own satirical spin on an “I want” song co-written by Alan Menken. But smiling corporate synergy is still corporate synergy, and Ralph Breaks the Internet gets sapped of its own emotional energy whenever you can’t ignore its part in a monolithic cross-marketing strategy. The charm of a fantasy often comes from its ability to transport you. For all its individually effective moments, Ralph Breaks the Internet mostly aims to transport you to disney.com. CW

RALPH BREAKS THE INTERNET

BB.5 John C. Reilly Sarah Silverman Taraji P. Henson PG

TRY THESE Monsters, Inc. (2001) Billy Crystal John Goodman G

Wreck-It Ralph (2012) John C. Reilly Sarah Silverman PG

Inside Out (2015) Amy Poehler Phyllis Smith PG

Zootopia (2016) Ginnifer Goodwin Jason Bateman PG

CINEMA CLIPS MOVIE TIMES AND LOCATIONS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

NEW THIS WEEK Film release schedules are subject to change. Reviews online at cityweekly.net CREED II [not yet reviewed] Adonis Creed (Michael B. Jordan) faces the son of Ivan Drago.

Opens Nov. 22 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)

RALPH BREAKS THE INTERNET BB.5 See review on p. 42. Opens Nov. 22 at theaters valleywide. (PG) ROBIN HOOD [not yet reviewed] The yet-again adventures of the legendary robber-from-the-rich (Taron Egerton). Opens Nov. 22 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)

SPECIAL SCREENINGS FREE SOLO At Park City Film Series, Nov. 23-24, 8 p.m.; Nov. 25, 6 p.m.

(PG-13) OVERLORD (1975) At Main Library, Nov. 27, 7 p.m. (NR)

THOR: RAGNAROK At Main Library, Nov. 28, 2 p.m. (PG-13)

no way to manufacture an emotional connection to characters who were just fine as obscure entries in a Potterverse wiki. (PG-13)—SR

CURRENT RELEASES

INSTANT FAMILY BBB.5 Co-writer/director Sean Anders pulls from his experience as a foster parent to earn both laughs and emotion. Ellie (Rose Byrne) and Sam (Mark Wahlberg) are a childless couple who somewhat impulsively decide to foster a trio of siblings: 15-year-old Lizzy (Isabela Moner), anxious Juan (Gustavo Quiroz) and tantrum terror Lita (Julianna Gamiz). Anders pitches his humor at a tarttongued sweet spot between bawdy comedy and adorable-kid smiles, and finds great moments for supporting cast members like Tig Notaro, Octavia Spencer and Margo Martindale. What takes it up a notch, though, is a recognition of the roller-coaster of successes and failures in this kind of non-traditional family.

At 120 minutes, it threatens to wear out its welcome a touch; it’s also as honest and funny a public-service announcement for foster parenting as you could hope for. (PG-13)—SR

BOY ERASED BBB Lucas Hedges stars in an adaptation of Garrard Conley’s memoir as Jared, an 18-year-old Arkansas college freshman who enters a Christian “pray the gay away” therapy program. Director Joel Edgerton isn’t shy about making some of the therapy look ridiculous, but his default position as a filmmaker is resolutely low-key, so he rarely goes over the top in villainizing Jared’s “instructors.”

Instead, he allows the weight of the story to fall on Hedges’ performance, and Edgerton gives him plenty to work with, from tentative first steps toward self-awareness, to a belief that he wants to change, to outrage once he begins to question the program’s effectiveness. There’s a disappointing stumble in the thin development of Jared’s relationship with his parents (Nicole Kidman and Russell Crowe); Jared’s own personal epiphany is stronger, thanks to Hedges’ ability to convey a coming-of-rage. (R)—Scott Renshaw FANTASTIC BEASTS: THE CRIMES OF GRINDELWALD BB This latest “Wizarding World” prequel from J.K. Rowling and director David Yates finds dark wizard Gellert Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) recently escaped from custody, and racing Newt Scamander (Eddie Redmayne), Tina Goldstein (Katherine Waterston) and company to track down powerful wizard Credence (Ezra Miller). The story leans hard into Grindelwald as a Trump-like populist despot, with scenes of him spewing creepy rhetoric at a rally. But as an over-correction from the instantly-evaporating bombast of the last film, Rowling emphasizes portentous questions linked to characters like Dumbledore (Jude Law) and Lita Lestrange (Zoë Kravitz). Yates’ big set pieces are satisfying enough, but no matter how hard Fantastic Beasts wants to ride the coattails of viewers’ love for Harry Potter and friends, there’s

WIDOWS BB.5 I swear I didn’t know the source material when, at the halfway point, I thought, “This really should have been a miniseries.”

Indeed, director Steve McQueen and co-writer Gillian Flynn adapt a 1983 British miniseries, focusing on three Chicago women—Veronica (Viola Davis), Linda (Michelle Rodgriguez) and Alice (Elizabeth Debicki)—who get into dangerous work after the death of their criminal husbands during a heist.

“Focusing” might be a bit of a stretch, however, since there’s also a significant election for alderman, and the script is dense with characters and ideas, nearly all of which get barely a moment to register before the script moves on. Although McQueen directs the hell out of this thing, including a terrific sequence focusing on the neighborhood through which Farrell’s car is driving, its sprawling narrative clearly can’t fit in a 129-minute container.

(R)—SR

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THE FRONT RUNNER BB.5 Jason Reitman’s political dramedy/light satire about Gary Hart is set in a quaint bygone era when adultery could derail a politician’s career and there were no news networks trying to fill 24 hours of programming each day. Things are different now, but the film, mostly a straightforward account of the final three weeks of Hart’s primary campaign for the 1988 Democratic presidential nomination, doesn’t add anything to the current debate about privacy, tabloid news and the morality of politicians—a missed opportunity to give an old episode new relevance. Hugh Jackman plays Hart, a handsome-for-a-politician Colorado senator who’s caught having an affair with model Donna Rice (Sara Paxton).

Vera Farmiga plays Hart’s mortified wife, with J.K. Simmons as his tough campaign manager, but it’s really an ensemble piece—almost Altmanesque at times—about the various campaign staffers and reporters surrounding the story. Reitman and co-writers Matt Bai and Jay Carson, adapting Bai’s book, recreate the spring of 1987 with nostalgia-goosing accuracy, and a tongue-in-cheek tone that keeps things from feeling too serious, but it’s never more than a standard political biopic with a little zip to it. Opens Nov. 22 at theaters valleywide. (R)—Eric D. Snider

GREEN BOOK BBB New York, 1962, a true story: Tony “Lip” Vallelonga (Viggo Mortensen) needs a job, so he agrees to drive classical pianist Don Shirley (Mahershala Ali), who is black, around the deep South on a six-week performance tour. It’s a bit Driving Miss Daisy in reverse, but also a bit Planes, Trains and Automobiles, with humor that is warm, sympathetic and humane. And yes, it’s also yet another tale of American racism told primarily through the eyes of a white person discovering how terrible racism can be. What snatches the film from condescending awfulness is the wit, charm and complexity with which Don and Tony are drawn, and the gorgeous performances by its stars. Mortensen is big, expansive movement and bigger brashness; Ali is tiny, precise actions and emotional reserve. Tony is gusto; Don is elegance. They’re a true odd couple, and the common ground they find during their trip is as much about personality as it is about race. It’s a familiar tune, but it’s played with virtuoso style. Opens Nov. 22 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)—MaryAnn Johanson

Š 2017

SNOWGLOBE

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

ACROSS

1. Using, as most kids do, a 52-Down (11) 2. Edward Gibbon's subject (11) 3. Dress code for some workplaces (11) 4. Greet with humility (5) 5. Actresses Gasteyer and Ortiz (4) 6. Albanian currency (3) 7. Brewpub offering, for short (3) 8. Ben Solo's father (3)

Boys' "Fun, Fun, Fun" (5) 52. Cheers for toreadors (4) 53. Like water ____ duck's back (4) 54. Cold War flier (3) 55. Durham sch. (3) 56. Eastern "way" (3) 58. The Hudson's Tappan ____ Bridge (3) 59. Chop (off) (3) 60. Fluffy trio? (3)

Last week’s answers

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

DOWN

9. Many a staffer (4) 10. Neighbor of a Syrian (5) 11. Socialite with a perfume named "Heiress" (11) 12. Weapon used in the Vietnam War (11) 13. 52-Down's function, to some (11) 21. Parrot's cry (3) 23. Cuz's father (3) 25. She became the "It" girl after starring in the 1927 movie "It" (8) 26. Meaning (8) 27. Many a Rolling Stone cover subject (8) 30. "Straight ____ Compton" (5) 31. Dreaded classroom note (5) 34. "Snowden" org. (3) 35. NNW's opposite (3) 44. Shipmate of Capt.

Kirk and Mr. Spock (6) 46. Old, crotchety guy (6) 48. Symbol of slowness (5) 50. Car in the Beach

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

1.Many promgoers: Abbr. (3) 4."South Pacific" song (7) 11.____ smear (3) 14.Prefix meaning "same" (3) 15. Not-so-great poker holding (7) 16. ____ Khan (Islamic title) (3) 17. Org. for docs (3) 18. Fictional country in "Black Panther" (7) 19. Gym unit (3) 20. Purity units (6) 22. Like an ass (6) 24. How some hearts are broken (5) 25. Navy rank below capt. (3) 28. Brass or woodwind: Abbr. (5) 29. Guitar part (4) 30. Butterlike spreads (5) 32. Grub (4) 33. "Today" rival, in brief (3) 34. Subtle differences (7) 36. Land west of Eng. (3) 37. Computer addresses, for short (3) 38. Backhand and forehand, e.g. (7) 39. My ____, Vietnam (3) 40. English war god (3) 41. Simultaneously (7) 42. 1987-94 "Star Trek" series, briefly (3) 43. ____ Mountains (range east of Moscow) (4) 45. Put up with (5) 46. Vincent van ____ (4) 47. Attacks from a snow fort, say (5) 49. Lennon's love (3) 50. Words to live by (5) 51. Item suggested visually by the black squares in this puzzle's grid (9) 54. Common word in insurance company names (6) 57. Peter (out) (6) 61. Bad way to be caught (6) 62. Unencumbered by (6) 63. Halloween personae (6) 64. Promo team (6)

SUDOKU

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CROSSWORD PUZZLE

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY B Y R O B

B R E Z S N Y

Go to realastrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes.

Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “You have two ways to live your life,” writes spiritual teacher Joseph Vitale, “from memory or inspiration.” In other words, you can take your cues about how to live your life from what happened in the past, or else you can make your decisions based on what you’re excited to do and become in the future. According to my analysis, the next 10 months will be an excellent time for you to fully embrace the latter approach. And it all starts now.

spiritual work. The astrological omens suggest it’s a favorable time for focused self-transformation.

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SUMMONS BY PUBLICATION IN THE SALT LAKE CITY DEPT. OF THE THIRD JUDICIAL DISTRICT COURT, SALT LAKE COUNTY, STATE OF UTAH. CASE NO. 189908359, JUDGE KENT HOLMBERG. CASCADE COLLECTIONS LLC, PLAINTIFF V. Pesega Vaa, DEFENDANT. THE STATE OF UTAH TO Pesega Vaa: You are summoned and required to answer the complaint that is on file with the court. Within 21 days after the last date of publication of this summons, you must file your written answer with the clerk of the court at the following address: 450 S State St., Salt Lake City, UT 84111, and you must mail or deliver a copy to plaintiff’s attorney Chad C. Rasmussen at 2230 N University Pkwy., Ste. 7E, Provo, UT 84604.

If you fail to do so, judgment by default will be taken against you for the relief demanded in the complaint. This lawsuit is an attempt to collect a debt of $7,367.25. /s/ Chad C. Rasmussen

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 | 45

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Are you smart enough to take advantage of the fact that your best relationships would benefit from bursts of innovative energy in the coming weeks? Are you brave enough to banish the ghost that still haunts your romantic life? Do you have the moxie to explore frontiers with collaborators who play fair and know how to have fun? Will you summon the curiosity and initiative to learn new CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You’ve always got more help available than you imagine, and strategies about how to enhance your approach to intimacy? I’ll that’s especially true these days. Both people you know and people answer those questions in your behalf: yes, yes, yes, and yes. you don’t know might come to your assistance and offer extra support—especially if you meet two conditions: 1. you sincerely CANCER (June 21-July 22): believe you deserve their assistance and support; 2. you clearly Would you agree with me that there are both boring, tireask for their assistance and support. Now here’s more good news some problems and fun, interesting problems? If so, read on. about the help that’s available. Whether you believe in spiritual According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you’re at beings, they, too, are primed to offer blessings and resources. If a fork in your path where you could either get further involved you don’t believe in their existence, I invite you to pretend you do with a boring, tiresome problem or a fun, interesting one. (I and see what happens. If you do believe in them, formulate clear think you’ll have to engage with one or the other.) Of course, I’m rooting for you to proactively wrangle with the fun, interesting requests for what you’d like them to offer you. one. Here’s timely inspiration from Cancerian author John W. Gardner: “We are continually faced with a series of great opporAQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In one of his poems, Arthur Rimbaud extolled the exquisite tunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems.” evenings when the mist soaked his face as he strolled, and he sipped that heavenly dew till he was drunk. Was he speaking LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): literally or metaphorically? Probably both, if I know Rimbaud. The Jharia Coalfield in eastern India is a 110-square-mile Anyway, Aquarius, I’d love for you to engage in similar exploits. reserve of underground coal. In some places, it’s on fire, and What are some natural adventures that might intoxicate you? has been burning for more than 100 years. This isn’t a good What simple pleasures might alter your consciousness, nudging thing. It’s wasteful and causes pollution. But now I’ll ask you you free of its habits? Meditate with sweet abandon on how to to put aside that scenario, and imagine a more benevolent kind of steadily burning fire: a splendor in your soul that never stops free yourself through the power of play and the imagination. radiating warmth and light; that draws from an inexhaustible source of fuel; that is a constant source of strength and courage PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): It’s illegal to hunt animals in Kenya. But members of the Dorobo and power. I’m happy to tell you that the coming months will tribe circumvent the law to provide food for their families. As be a favorable time to establish and nurture this eternal flame. three or more Dorobo men wander out on the savanna, they wait for hungry lions to kill a wildebeest or other creature. Then VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): they stride toward the feasting beasts in a calm show of force Marilyn Monroe, Georgia O’Keeffe and President Franklin D. until the predators run away in confusion. The brave scavengers Roosevelt were direct descendants of the pilgrims who sailed swoop in and swiftly remove a portion of the wildebeest, then from England to the New World on the famous Mayflower ship coolly walk away, leaving plenty for the lions when they return to in 1620. I, on the other hand, am a direct descendant of a 19ththeir meal. I bring this scene to your attention, Pisces, because century Slovakian coal miner who toiled in the underground I suspect that in the coming weeks you will have similar levels of darkness. What about you, Virgo? Now would be a rich and provocative time to reconnect with your roots; to remember courage and poise as you go after what you want. where your people originated; to explore the heritage that served as the matrix from which you sprouted.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In his autobiography On the Move, neurologist Oliver Sacks praised his friend Jerry’s curiosity and knowledge. “Jerry has LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): one of the most spacious, thoughtful minds I have ever encoun- According to researchers who study animal behavior at two Italian tered, with a vast base of knowledge of every sort,” wrote universities, chickens can do arithmetic. The birds don’t even need Sacks, “but it is a base under continual questioning and scru- to be trained; the skill seems to be innate. (Read details here: tiny.” So willing was Jerry to question and re-evaluate his own tinyurl.com/chickensdomath.) I’m wondering whether chickens assumptions that Sacks said he had “seen his friend suddenly born under the sign of Libra might even be able to do algebra in stop in mid-sentence and say, ‘I no longer believe what I was the coming weeks. According to my assessment of the astrological about to say.’” That’s the gold standard to which I hope you omens, the mental acuity of many Libran creatures will be at a will aspire in the coming weeks, Aries. As bright and articulate peak. How will you use your enhanced intelligence? as you’ll be, you will have an even higher calling to expand your SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): mind through continual questioning.

In March 2005, far more people than usual won big money in a regional Powerball lottery in the U.S. The average for each draw is TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In recent years, a few pioneers have gotten microchips implant- four winners, but on this special occasion, 110 players were awarded ed under their skin. These technological marvels enable them to at least $100,000 and as much as $500,000. The reason for the open doors and turn on lights with merely a wave of their hands, anomaly seemed to have been an oracle that appeared in a number of or receive up-to-the-minute readings on what’s transpiring widely distributed fortune cookies. It provided five of the six winning inside their bodies. Now an additional frontier has arisen: people numbers. Inspired by this crazy stroke of good fortune, and in accorusing do-it-yourself kits to experiment on their own DNA. For dance with the favorable financial omens now coming to bear on you, example, some have tweaked their genes so their bodies cre- I hereby offer you six numbers to use as your lucky charms. Will they ate more muscle than is natural. I would love for you to change help you win a game of chance? I can’t be sure. At the very least, they yourself around in the coming weeks, Taurus, but not in these will titillate and massage the part of your psyche that is magnetic to particular ways. I’d rather see you do subtle psychological and wealth. Here they are: 37, 16, 58, 62, 82, 91.

WE ARE HIRING

SUMMONS BY PUBLICATION IN THE SALT LAKE CITY DEPT. OF THE THIRD JUDICIAL DISTRICT COURT, SALT LAKE COUNTY, STATE OF UTAH. CASE NO. 189918414, JUDGE KEITH KELLY. CASCADE COLLECTIONS LLC, PLAINTIFF V. NINA BUSHONG, DEFENDANT. THE STATE OF UTAH TO NINA BUSHONG: You are summoned and required to answer the complaint that is on file with the court. Within 21 days after the last date of publication of this summons, you must file your written answer with the clerk of the court at the following address: 450 S State St., Salt Lake City, UT 84111, and you must mail or deliver a copy to plaintiff’s attorney Chad C. Rasmussen at 2230 N University Pkwy., Ste. 7E, Provo, UT 84604.

If you fail to do so, judgment by default will be taken against you for the relief demanded in the complaint. This lawsuit is an attempt to collect a debt of $1,722.23. /s/ Chad C. Rasmussen

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46 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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Housing Votes

Although the midterm elections are over, some races still are up in the air. So are national housing issues—things like Housing and Urban Development funding, lowincome housing tax credits, and overhauling of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. House committee chairmanships will change; the Senate will be unaffected. They’ll either favor prohousing programs or anti-housing spending, which will impact mortgage loans for individuals and businesses and the lending laws that accompany that money. With all the fascination over national election results, you might have missed a few hyper-local votes impacting housing around the state.

In Holladay, voters defeated a proposed high-density housing and mixed-use project that was planned for the old Cottonwood Mall site. The proposed plans were worth an estimated $560 million to Ivory Homes, Woodbury Corp. and the thousands of contractors, sub-contractors and skilled workers who would build the project. Developers tried for more than two years to convince residents what a swell idea they created for the area and even filed a lawsuit to stop the issue from appearing on the ballot. They had previously won Holladay City approval in May to build almost 800 apartments, 210 single-family homes, restaurants, offices and retail spaces, but unhappy citizens came out of that public hearing and formed “Unite for Holladay” and rallied locals to place the developer’s plan onto the ballot. Ivory and Woodbury lost the last-minute lawsuit as well as the popular vote and have threatened to pull out of the project, but it’s unclear if they will really abandon a development worth so much money.

In Orem, voters weighed in on a rezoning option to allow a 450-unit (1,600 beds) housing project for Utah Valley University students. The area only allowed single-family homes and residents did not want high density and increased traffic to come to their ’hood.

At press time, the proposition was passing with a more than 1,200 vote lead.

Rep. Joel Briscoe, D-Salt Lake City, is a member of the Utah Housing Gap Coalition and said during the summer that the state “anticipates needing 58,619 affordable housing options for people by 2020.” One wonders with so many people needing a roof over their heads, and the price of rentals and homes for sale rising, how the homeless population will be affected this year. Prospective tenants ought to consider managing an apartment building, living with a relative, professionally house sit or getting more roommates. n

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WEIRD

New World Order With the advent of driverless cars, new questions are being raised about a wide range of potential traffic situations. One example: What happens when police pull over an autonomous vehicle? According to The Washington Post, the company whose cars are now zipping around Phoenix is one car-length ahead of us: Alphabet’s Waymo cars (Chrysler Pacifica minivans) will use “sensors to identify police or emergency vehicles by detecting their appearance, their sirens and their emergency lights,” the company’s “Emergency Response Guide” explains. “The Waymo vehicle is designed to pull over and stop when it finds a safe place to do so.” Next, the car will unlock its doors and roll down its windows, allowing the police officer to communicate with a remote support team. The company will even send a human representative to the scene if necessary. So relax and enjoy the ride. Hal will take care of you.

Irony Kids at Pierre Part Primary school in Pierre Part, La., thought they knew what to expect during Red Ribbon Week, an annual alcohol awareness program, but a school administrator threw them a curveball, reported WBRZ-TV. Rachel Turley, 49, assistant principal at the school, was on her way to work on Oct. 29 when other motorists reported that she was driving dangerously on Highway 70. Officers caught up with her at the school and took her to a police substation, where they determined her blood alcohol content was .224, nearly three times the legal limit of .08. She was charged with DWI and careless operation. “The fact that she chose to do this on the Monday of Red Ribbon Week is a slap in the face,” commented Niki Lacoste, grandparent of a Pierre Part student.

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n Two unnamed Marine Corps flyers have been grounded pending an investigation after they flew a penis-shaped flight pattern over the Salton Sea on Oct. 23, the Los Angeles Times reported.

The pilots were outed by a Twitter account called Aircraft Spots, which tracks flight patterns. Josef Patterson, a Marine Corps spokesman, said the jokesters are assisting with other duties in their squadron at Air Station Miramar in San Diego. They can’t take credit for the idea, though: In November 2017, a Navy jet crew flew in a similar pattern over Washington, D.C.

Crime Report Two employees of a waste disposal company in Germany have been convicted of pinching more than 100 portable toilets and selling them to a company in the Netherlands. The Associated Press reported on Nov. 6 that the toilets, worth almost $80,000, disappeared over a period of months. The Duesseldorf district court sentenced a 40-year-old man to a 10-month suspended sentence and a 28-year-old to six months.

Only three of the missing toilets have been recovered.

Suspicions Confirmed Steven Carroll, 61, and his brother, Michael, 57, had been trying to solve the mystery of their dad’s disappearance since 1961, when George Carroll “went out and just never came back,” as their mother, Dorothy, explained it to them. Michael bought the family’s Lake Grove, N.Y., house in the 1980s from Dorothy, who died in 1998. Over the years paranormal investigators and psychics have sensed an “energy” in the home, and radar indicated there was something about five feet below the basement. A few months ago, Michael’s grown sons began digging, and on Oct. 30, they unearthed human bones. Now, according to Newsday, dental records and DNA will be used to determine if the bones belong to George Carroll, a process Suffolk County Chief of Detectives Gerard Gigante says could take months.

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n The Associated Press reported on Nov. 7 that Virginia’s 5th Congressional District has a new Republican representative, Denver Riggleman, who beat Democrat Leslie Cockburn despite Cockburn’s suggestion in July that Riggleman was unfit for the office because of a Bigfoot erotica book he had written, “The Mating Habits of Bigfoot and Why Women Want Him.” While Riggleman is indeed the author of “Bigfoot Exterminators Inc.: The Partially Cautionary, Mostly True Tale of Monster Hunt 2006,” he says the erotica book was a joke among himself and buddies from the military. (Bonus: Distillery owner Riggleman entered the race when incumbent Tom Garrett dropped out after announcing he is an alcoholic.)

Babs De Lay

| COMMUNITY |

Election Roundup An Independence, Mo., city councilman who was not on the Nov. 6 ballot managed to let his temper get away from him that morning at a church polling station. Witnesses told KSHB-TV that councilman Tom Van Camp was in the parking lot of the church when another man yelled at him, “Tom Van Camp, you SOB!” Witness Lee Williams said the man then approached Van Camp, and the next time she looked up, Van Camp and the man were “down there on the grass and they’re punching each other. I was just shocked to see my councilman in a fist fight.” A voter called police, who responded, but both men had already left the scene in separate vehicles. Van Camp is under fire in Independence for spending public money on personal travel. He is up for re-election in 2020.

Bright Ideas David Weaver, 37, of Nelson, British Columbia, glibly avoided becoming dinner for 14 sharks at Toronto’s Ripley Aquarium on Oct. 12 after stripping naked and jumping into a 3-millionliter tank and swimming about as other patrons looked on and recorded his stunt. Weaver arrived around 10 p.m. and quickly climbed to an overlook of the “Dangerous Lagoon,” where the sharks and other animals are displayed. Onlookers exclaimed as he made several attempts to climb out of the tank, exposing both his front and back sides. “I thought he was a worker until I noticed he was naked,” said one witness. The sharks “seemed angry but also frightened of him. They are fed daily, so I guess they had no reason to attack him.” The National Post reported police also connected Weaver to an assault a few hours earlier outside the nearby Medieval Times dinner theater. He was later arrested near Thunder Bay.

HAPPY FRIENDSGIVING TO ALL!

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Surprise!

A homeowner in Upper Tantallon, Nova Scotia, received an unsettling phone call from a neighbor on Oct. 16, saying there were two strangers in her house. The door had been left unlocked so a neighbor could walk the dog, CTVNews reported, and police expected to find that the home had been “cleaned out,” said Nova Scotia Royal Canadian Mounted Police spokesperson Cpl. Dal Hutchinson. Instead, the two women inside the house had cleaned up—they were employees of a cleaning company and had gone to the wrong address. They left without realizing their mistake. Hutchinson praised the neighbor for being so observant and noted the silver lining: The house was cleaned for free.

Family Values In Italy, an unnamed 48-year-old woman was ordered to pay $1,000 in late October after failing to peacefully settle a two-year dispute with her mother. The daughter, a vegan, threatened her mother with stabbing after the mother prepared Bolognese meat sauce. The daughter told the court she had long avoided sensory and olfactory contact with animal products before moving back in with her mother, but The Telegraph reports, there had been an escalation of aggression between the two women, and apparently the long-simmering sauce was the last straw. “If you won’t stop on your own then I’ll make you stop,” the March 2016 complaint quoted the daughter saying as she grabbed a knife. “Quit making ragu, or I’ll stab you in the stomach.”

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48 | NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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