COACH - The Professional Coaching Magazine to Empower, Educate & Inspire - APRIL 2020 by coach-magazine

APRIL 2020 ISSUE FOUR

EDUCATE I EMPOWER I INSPIRE

MAGAZINE

Values

FAITH ACTION MIRACLES Suzy Ashworth

THE GENIUS DIP Richard Tyler

MANAGE ANXIETY & KEEP A CALM MIND

THE FOUNDATION FOR LIFE JOHN THOMPSON

Self Mastery &

Jill Savage

HEART CONNECTION WITH JEAN-PIERRE DE VILLIERS

Coaching insights for you, your life & your business

EDITOR’S LETTER Welcome to the first Anniversary edition of COACH Magazine. COACH’s core message - the importance of professional coaching - has been well-received during the past year, with the magazine being shared to reach all corners of the globe. This is something to celebrate and thank you to everyone who has been a part of it, supported it and shared it. COACH was built on my own cornerstone values of connection and community and, in the unprecedented global crisis we face with the Covid-19 outbreak, we have never before been so connected: albeit in a way we could never have envisaged or chosen. We ricochet rapidly between feelings of fear, overwhelm, grief, anxiety and desperation to love, compassion, responsibility, connection and hope. In our current state of physical disconnect, we are forced to stop, to confront and to recalibrate. To think differently, to change our behaviours and be incredibly flexible in order to protect ourselves and each other. In any time of challenge and adversity, we seek love and connection, clarity and purpose whilst also digging deep to discover our own resilience, flexibility and acceptance in order to ride the storms. We are not coming out of this the same people and it’s time for a shift and to ask yourself who you really are you and what you want? Understand what’s important to you and what’s not; know your values and how to live by them and to help others to do the same. As coaches, this is a pivotal time to implement our skills to help others to find their way through their own minefield.

Coaching is about change and moving forward, about exploring every possibility and finding creative solutions. Intense change has been thrust upon us now and is deeply uncomfortable and challenging, yes, but this is where the power of coaching can help. Professional coaches and therapists are needed now more than ever as we know how to help and serve others using the skills and resources we have. During this time especially, it’s important to shift focus from ourselves onto others to help where we can and continue to offer our services and build our businesses, now and into the future. It’s also the time to be fully and truly grateful for all we have in every single moment. On the cover is the truly inspiring High Perfomance Coach, Jean-Pierre De Villiers, who shares his personal journey to self-mastery, heart connection and altruistic living. There are many more talents inside too, sharing a variety of approaches and niches. Let’s support each other to face our immediate, most crucial challenges and then look towards rebuilding, growth and transformation to find new ways and create new foundations. I hope this issue of COACH offers you inspiration and valuable insights to educate, empower and inspire you, now more than ever.

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Teresa Brooks is an award-winning businesswoman, founder and Editor of COACH Magazine, a professionally trained Coach (AC Accredited Training), NLP Practitioner (ANLP Accredited Training) and Mental Health First Aider MHFA (England). teresabrookscoaching.com

A LOOK INSIDE Editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 04

SELF MASTERY & THE THREE PILLARS OF LIFE

FAITH + ACTION = MIRACLES

MASTERING YOUR MINDSET FOR SUCCESS

WEALTH AND THE LAW OF ATTRACTION

TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS

THE PATH TO GENIUS CREATIVITY

VALUES - THE FOUNDATION FOR A FULFILING LIFE

NEUROSCIENCE AND CHANGING HABITS

UNDERSTANDING INTERNAL CONFLICT

MINDFULNESS TO MANAGE ANXIETY & CALM THE MIND

LEVERAGING THE POWER OF ARCHETYPES

21 HOW TO RELAX & ADAPT TO CHANGE

COACHING THROUGH & BEYOND CANCER

WHY OK IS NOT ENOUGH

TO NICHE OR NOT TO NICHE?

OVERCOMING FOOD ADDICTION

RECOMMENDED READS & PODCASTS

THE DIRECTORY

Disclaimer@2020 BrooksMedia & TeresaBrooksCoaching. The majority of articles are written in advance and are printed in good faith, correct at time of publishing. Whilst every effort is made to ensure the reliability and accuracy of the material, no responsibility is accepted for errors or omissions. No part of this publication may be reproduced or copied without the written consent and permission of the publisher. Cover photo: Jean-Pierre De Villiers

DESIGNER: MARK HENDERSON @REDCRABCREATIVE

“The greatest way to learn is to teach”

THE THREE PILLARS OF LIFE FOR SELF-MASTERY THE MIND - THE BODY - THE HEART

ast year, I sat in the San Diego home of my coach, Lisa Nichols, one of my greatest teachers. She leaned forward, looked me in the eye and said: “JP, you’re playing it safe”

She had been coaching me for a while and saw me not only for who I was, but for who I was capable of truly becoming. She said I was hiding behind what I was good at and not committing to why I believe I was here. I remember feeling the resistance to her words. But I took a deep breath and accepted she was right and, in that moment, I started to understand that the path I’d been on for so long just wasn’t enough. It was time to really step onto the path of the ultimate journey - mastering my heart.

Physical Mastery I’ve been coaching and speaking on stage for most of my adult life; talking to thousands of people at events and seminars and working one to one with people. I began my professional career originally as a fitness coach 14 years ago. When I was 7, I found sport and I used it as a strategy to feel good during my turbulent school years in Cape Town. It worked, but at 19 I found another strategy, partying, and by the time I hit 23 I was getting life very wrong. I turned back to fitness and mindset to try and get it right.

Mind Mastery During these years in fitness coaching, I discovered that true transformation lay in the mind, not the body, and I didn’t want to just help people change their bodies, I wanted to help them change their lives.

For the next three years, I immersed myself in the world of fitness and physical mastery. I studied personal development, became a personal trainer and surrounded myself with the right coaches, mentors and role models. Within two and a half years, I’d turned my life around in a big way. I was very successful: I had written a book, featured in magazines and commercials and worked with celebrities.

To do that, I needed to help them master their minds. I trained as an NLP Practitioner, transitioned into life coaching and a few years later, was making a real difference working in this way. But, again, for me, something felt missing and I wasn't living by my highest values of growth and contribution.

Yet I didn’t feel truly fulfilled.

Jean-Pierre De Villiers (JP) is a South African born professional athlete, high performance Coach, NLP Practitioner, inspirational speaker and author. He takes on extraordinary fitness challenges around the world, changes thousands of people’s lives every year through inspirational speaking and coaches people in how to achieve self-mastery through building their physical, mental and heart connections. JP has invested his entire life in his own personal development and self-mastery. He has been coaching for 15 years and works with high performing business leaders and champions who demand the best from themselves. jeanpierredevilliers.com

Growing up, I’d experienced the lowest of lows and I've always been obsessed about chasing the highest of highs so I moved into high-performance coaching, aligning with clients who were intensely dedicated to their success, performance and constantly striving for more, as I was.

I pulled back on coaching and turned away all speaking opportunities. I started to meditate, focus more on gratitude and mindfulness and, after a further two years of personal growth focus with mentors and teachers, I began to unearth my answer.

With over a decade of coaching, four books under my belt and a large social following, I now helped high performers with both their physical and mental mastery.

That answer lay in finding my purpose. Why I believed I was here and what I was truly meant to do and be.

Yet I found myself seeking a deeper fulfilment, still.

Deep down, I’d always known I had more to give and, for the first time, I connected with being much greater than simply my existence; than my current life.

This time, though, I knew the right question to ask myself. ‘What does my heart want?’ Because that’s exactly where fulfillment lies - in our hearts. Success is what we see on the outside, fulfillment is what we feel on the inside.

I wanted to create a massive impact in people’s lives and, the truth was, I had done great work so far, but just as my coach said, I was playing it safe.

I needed to understand what really made me tick on the inside so I could continue to serve even more highly and make more of an impact living as my true highest self.

So, I finally stepped into living in my truth and from my heart.

Heart Mastery

to contribute and give back to others in need. It may be mentoring a young person or helping someone who lacks experience. There are great blessings in mentoring others and being a role model to someone who needs it.

When you live from your heart, you live from contribution, not consumption.

‘The greatest way to learn is to teach’ - a principle I’ve lived by for most of my life.

Living from your heart means living completely from a place of service. It means truly living by your values, embracing your meaning and purpose: and this is never about you.

Healing is the core of heart mastery You came into this world limitless and abundant, believing you could do anything and everything you wanted and you are on your own unique journey. But I’m sure there will be something in your life that you feel needs to be healed. Don’t ignore it. Pay attention to it, prioritise it and heal it.

One of my greatest heroes, Nelson Mandela often used a very well-known African saying ‘UBUNTU’ - ‘I am because of you’.

If you keep doing the work for you, life will keep working for you but to reach your highest potential, you need to get out of your own way.

Flip this and it reads ‘you are because of me’. Live by this mantra and you will care and love others as much as you care for and love yourself. For me, this is altruism. Wanting for others as much as you want and wish for yourself. In fact, I would go as far to say that your life is not about you. I believe when you are living as a true altruist, living for others, that’s how you know you’ve mastered your heart.

If you let fear, trauma, or limiting beliefs block you, you’re never going to embrace the unknown or step out of your comfort zone.

“A life of altruism mustn't be at your own expense”

But a life of altruism mustn’t be at your own expense. You can’t pour from an empty cup so always fill up your own cup first, then give the overﬂow to others. Every time you give to others, you receive much more in return: as what you give is truly what you get.

How to live in the space of heart mastery and altruism Share your truth. This article is my truth. I share in honesty wherever I go and those who listen to me speak invariably say: ‘thank you for your truth’. The truth sets us free and it frees others to free themselves from their own stories. Live your life in contribution, not in consumption Find ways to raise awareness for good causes, embark on challenges that raise money for charitable causes. Align your business with charitable goals, support non-profit organisations, your community or one of the UN sustainable goals. The more you give, the more you receive in the forms of gratitude, love and fulfillment. Mentor someone - you don’t need to know everything; there’s always going to be people around you who know less than you. Find those people and create a way

Step out now - because on the other side of high fear lies high love and on that side of high love lies high opportunity, high

FAITH + ACTION = MIRACLES

Suzy Ashworth is a business growth strategist, renowned Hay House author and Mum of 3. She holds diplomas in Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy and is a Certified Quantum Healer. She helps female entrepreneurs increase their intention, impact and income with grace and ease. Suzy has been featured in Forbes, The Guardian and the BBC and runs a number of retreats and events including Limitless Live, an annual one-day womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s event. suzyashworth.com

A simple formula with the ability to change your life and business forever.

aith +action = miracles is the afﬁrmation I’ve said to myself for the last eight years and it’s changed my life.

Create your own positive manta or afﬁrmation When it comes to creating affirmations, I love any sentence or goal that has a clear and positive intention to receive or action to take that will result in a positive outcome.

I started saying this soon after my son was born. It was inspired by the teachings of Napoleon Hill’s book ‘Think and Grow Rich’ where he told his story of coaching his deaf and mute son to hear and talk. Despite evidence and expert advice, he and his wife decided their son would one day not only hear, but speak too. They told their son this repeatedly, until one day with the help of external forces, he could not only hear but also learned to speak too. This story really made an impact on me.

1. Starting with the words ‘I am’ or ‘I can’ is powerful. I am happy. I am a client magnet. I am feeling wealthier and wealthier every day. 2. For the rest of your mantra, pick a sentence that you feel aligned and excited by. (But if you are feeling broke, using a mantra like ‘I am rich’ creates too much dissonance for it to have a positive effect so remember to stay aligned.) I am taking actions every day that help me to feel richer and richer. This affirmation creates the opportunity for you to grow into the mantra.

Why mantras matter I had already learned through my training as a solution focused hypnotherapist and psychotherapist that repetition of words and statements change the neural pathways in the brain.

3. Keep your affirmation in the positive and current I am in a loving relationship. I am great at serving my clients 4. Recite your affirmations with positive feelings and emotions.

In a deeply relaxed state like hypnosis, we can create new pathways and ways of thinking more quickly. As most of us are not in a constant state of hypnosis, another great way to create new habitual ways of thinking is through repetition.

There is plenty of online marketing in the coaching industry, and although people can’t always see your face and although they may not be able to quite put their finger on it, they can tell if your energy is out of alignment with the words you using. Which means that ‘oh-so-perfect client’ that you know you could help, walks right on by you without even knowing why.

By the time my son was born, I had created this mantra based on this knowledge to inspire and motivate him long after my passing and whilst ‘Faith plus Action equals Miracles’ is now a life and business mantra, it began as a gift for my son and has also inspired me to achieve.

I have often heard mantras and affirmations described as ‘woo woo’ which is another reason why I love my affirmation as it combines the intangible with the practical and this is how I approach my life and business.

I credit my successful coaching business to the compound effect of the consistent drip, drip effect of this mantra plus taking consistent action in alignment with it every single day and what I know to be true is it’s how we talk to ourselves that matters.

I deeply dislike the words ‘realistic’ and ‘sensible’ when it comes to making a big impact in the world – these types of words don’t challenge the status quo! Dreaming beyond what feels realistic creates opportunities you never imagined and when those opportunities present themselves, it’s time to take action.

What we think about our capacity to succeed, hit our goals and targets, our self-belief impacts the actions we are prepared to take. Any lack of self-belief will stop you having faith, stop you asking for the business, stop you charging the real value of your products and services and, ultimately, stop you being successful.

Taking action Without the action part, this formula falls apart. Sitting meditating on your goals for hours on end just won’t cut it. You need to be ready to go out there and grab it the day with both hands. Show up, be visible, be of service, ask for the business. Be brave and believe. Every single day.

If you get stuck with thoughts that feed the idea of lack, doubt and fear then it becomes increasingly difficult to show up as inspiring and motivating in a way that’s genuine and authentic.

As it’s only when you combine the two do miracles start to occur.

If you consistently tell yourself to expect ‘miracles’ you will feel good about that and when you feel good, you take positive action; and positive action leads to positive results!

Jaimie Sarah is an Executive Coach, Business and Branding Strategist and founder of The Aligned Business Blueprintâ&#x201E;˘. She helps successful service-based directors expand their businesses via aligned sales, marketing and mindset. She bridges the gap between practical business momentum and mindset, combining her commercial savvy gained from a decade in multi-million and billion dollar corporations with years of personal development experience and training. Jaimie has been featured in Forbes, was recently awarded Female Executive Coach of The Year 2019 and was shortlisted for Kensington & Chelsea Business of The Year 2019. jaimiesarah.com

20 MINUTE BUSINESS ALIGNMENT REVIEW FREE FOR COACH READERS (VALID UNTIL APRIL 30TH 2020) EMAIL: HELLO@JAIMIESARAH.COM

MASTERING YOUR MINDSET FOR TOTAL BUSINESS ALIGNMENT Dedicated, results-oriented directors are always looking to take their performance to the next level and to reignite their sense of alignment with what they’re doing, how and why.

any have lives and businesses where everything looks incredibly shiny and sparkly on the outside, but inside they want more. No matter what they’ve already accomplished or how impressed anyone else is with what they’ve already done, they know they can be and achieve even more, so much more.

reason! Being very attached to external accomplishments to prove worth and value (to ourselves above all) can cause a lot of frantic and hurried thinking that leads to decisions and choices that aren’t in true alignment for the long-term. It’s very important to approach business from a conscious place, from a place of seeking alignment rather than simply seeking results for results’ sake. Unconscious leadership often leads to ego-based leading and functioning, which inhibits the true growth of a business.

I work with successful, established service-based directors to transform their inner game, impact and income to unprecedented levels whilst growing businesses that are an extension of their personal values.

Conscious leadership and business growth, however, facilitates the growth of a business. It makes it easier for the business to grow, without requiring “When success the same level of “hard” work looks good on as it creates the ability to work the outside, but smarter instead.

With a degree in Psychology from the University of London, training from Harvard Business School and multiple accredited international coaching certifications, I’ve worked with some of the world’s top leaders and mentors and the most common block that appears to achieving next-level growth is a feeling of misalignment.

One of the key components of conscious leadership is recognising that you are not your thoughts. Your mental space is an extremely valuable commodity for your success, priceless in fact. As a business director, it’s essential to be disciplined about the thoughts you entertain and to separate them from who you are.

When success looks good on the outside, but doesn’t quite feel good on the inside, there is a misalignment somewhere. The second most common block high-achievers experience is an overactive, hyper-analytical mind. This is a greatest asset and worst enemy in equal measure. High achievers can easily get caught up with doing and overthinking, basing their self-worth on external accomplishments rather than their inherent value as a human being.

doesn’t quite feel good on the inside, there is a misalignment somewhere”

Focus on what practical elements of your business you need to shift or elevate, rather than black and white “all or nothing” thinking to allow yourself to pursue great alignment and even greater results.

We’re called ‘human beings’ not ‘human doings’ for a

CONSCIOUS MONEY CREATION 

SHOW ME THE MONEY! Money is a very happy by-product of alignment within you and it’s also the vital, financial component of your business.

nderstanding your own alignment and the energetics of money offers you the opportunity to increase abundance, alignment and a whole new way of living.

every action that you take. Your action resonates at a frequency which the universe then responds to, so in order to affect your physical reality, you need to do something and take an action that resonates with what you want more of. Spiritual practice is a key to happiness but if you want to create more actual money, you must vibrate at a physical level so that the universe says yes, brings you new opportunities and money will land physically in your bank account.

The Law of Attraction The Law of Attraction is one of our many governing laws and, in its simplest form, it states that like attracts like or alternatively, the universe always says yes.

Mind your language

A common misconception of the LOA is that you can ‘happy thought think’ or ‘believe’ something into existence.

You are designed to create a fulfilling and abundant life, which the universe will say yes to, but it can only do that when you choose it.

So, if you think long and hard enough about owning that red Ferrari, it’ll one day magically appear on your driveway? No, that’s simply not how it works.

You can make as many affirmations as you want but if the language you are using at a vibrational level is one of obligation, guilt, sacrifice, resentment, judgment or with any negative root, you’re going to create more of that judgement, obligation, sacrifice and guilt.

Happy thinking or attempting to force yourself to believe something that just isn’t true for you will not magically create what you say you want and certainly not the money to buy it. When you think positive thoughts you will feel better, as great thoughts create more great thoughts, but you can’t think money into real form via them.

Choosing lower vibrational energies like obligation means the universe simply says yes to that, giving you more obligation, because that is what you are ‘saying’ you want.

You are designed to manifest, designed to create.

Manifesting isn’t a magic spell or a secret sauce that only the chosen few are able to master.

Everything that you have in your experience right now is created by YOU. Not through ‘good or bad’ thoughts and beliefs but because the universe is 100% reactive and says yes to the energy underpinning your actions.

Money is often how we assign value as it represents value. When you choose not to value your experience, you will become poorer and poorer, as you repeatedly choose an energy at the opposite end of the vibrational spectrum of money.

The language of money Putting a positive spin or shifting to a more positive attitude and then doing the same things you’ve always done doesn’t work either. What you’ve been doing doesn’t resonate to what you want, or you would already have it! The language of money is about the energy underneath

Karen Baines is a Conscious Wealth Creation Mentor teaching passionate, ambitious entrepreneurs how to master their own creational process in their business and finances in order to unlock and reach their next income level. She is a regular speaker and featured on The Dr.Pat Show, a transformational talk show for Radio Seattle. Karen is also a founding contributor to the new House of Pre-Eminence Magazine. soulwhispers.uk

3 tips for starting your money alignment lives, so by getting on top of your finances, you are making more aligned choices by taking responsibility.

1. Detox as many obligations from your life as possible. If your current experience in your business or with your money is less than you desire, this is a powerful start as obligation is the vibrational opposite of freedom. By choosing less obligation, you are choosing more freedom, which, when it comes to money, is a very friendly energy.

3. Do the work. Mastering your own creational process and alignment to money isn’t a tool, it’s a whole new way of being. It requires courage and taking full responsibility for every choice you make. There is no hiding place, but there is nothing more empowering than cracking your own code and stepping into the new version of yourself that is indeed the powerful creator and generator or your own experience.

2. Ask yourself where you are ignoring your money and choosing not to deal with it? If you choose not to deal with your money, the universe will say yes and you will have no money to deal with! We ignore what we don’t want in our

TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS A model for deeper, effective communication

didn’t set out to be a coach. In fact, during my Transactional Analysis (TA) Psychotherapy training, I believed (inaccurately) that coaching was ‘therapy-lite’ and should be avoided.

But then I met the founder of an international coach training institute who helped me understand that coaching is a two-way conversation, whereas psychotherapy - and my previous role as a social worker - is often a one sided process with little input from the client. In my coaching practice, I combine a potent integration of TA and coaching to achieve life-changing transformation, helping people to recognise, understand, resolve and (once and for all) let go of the ways that hold them back from all they can be.

WHAT IS TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS? Transactional Analysis (TA) is a psychosocial approach to understanding ourselves and others and offers a language to describe what is happening for us and between us. Ego States Model At its root, TA holds that there are three ways - or ego states - of thinking, feeling and being. The Parent, the Adult and the Child. Our Parent ego is shaped by the ways we observed adults around us when we were young. It contains the rules, the ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’, the things we feel we ‘should’ and shouldn’t do. In our Parent ego, it’s as if we press ‘play’ on one of these recordings and our true selves leave the room. We act like we saw our parents act. History repeats itself. This ego state is useful to keep us alive and well, to regulate and offer useful limits.

Unfortunately, our Parent can also limit our confidence, define our energy, our success levels and even our earnings. Our Adult ego is rooted in personal awareness, mindfulness and the here and now. The Adult deals with truths, facts and feelings without leaning into rules or limited thinking and behaviours. This state is about being true to ourselves. When we do not fully operate in Adult or when we confuse it with another ego state then we are not ‘here or now’. This results in inviting tricky, confusing interactions with others.

Lucy Power is a Therapeutic Coach, professionally certified with the ICF and trained in Transactional Analysis for Psychotherapy. She runs online group programmes, one to one coaching, retreats and events. Lucy also trains coaches, therapists and counsellors in Transactional Analysis and offers training and consultancy to organisations. lucypowerworld.com

Our Child ego state contains all our childhood experiences - our personal past. In this ego state, we either adapt to the rules held in by our Parent or free ourselves from them by being silly, helpless or rebellious. This state is useful for ideas, problem solving, playfulness, fun and to gain emotional connection. We often operate in similar ways as we did when we were very young that meant staying safe, fitting in and being loveable but in adult life, these ways of being do not always serve us well. When we recognise the ego states on which TA is based, our communication becomes cleaner, more clear and open and problems feel more manageable. TA changed my own personal world by helping me to understand myself and others and learn how to communicate in a new way. Although I had a good job, a marriage and a full life (which I described as happy), I look back and know that that wasn’t true. I was existing in a way that drained me more than it energised me. I wasn’t committed to myself nor the quality of my life. I was living in ways that ensured I kept to the limits and restrictions I had imposed through these ego states, but through coaching and TA psychotherapy, I became free of this and you can too.

THE GENIUS DIP

- the journey to true creativity

orking with CEOs and senior leadership teams, my approach is a combination of tough love, deep care and compassion with challenge and provocation and being a coach is a life’s work that’s constantly evolving for me.

Feeling the agonies of life, being heartbroken and feeling lost can inspire the most beautiful lyrics and create the most incredible music. These creatives have often been emotionally, financially, spiritually challenged and this ‘back against the wall’ state is what they have (sometimes unwittingly) accessed to create some of their best work. This resonates with the world, since behind the masks many of us wear, is the same pain and it’s this pain that often needs to be accessed in order to break free from our comfort zones and step into our own creativity.

Genius Creativity Many of the great creatives and entrepreneurs of our time - Van Gogh, Richard Branson, Amy Winehouse - accessed their own ‘genius’ in times of trauma, scarcity and adversity.

Leaning into emotion

own struggle to stay aligned with my values and mentally well in such a demanding environment. I made a bold step and ended my Phantom contract. I said yes to all new opportunities and, although unclear on my direction, a CEO at one consultancy saw an opportunity for me to combine the world of performance with the world of leadership.

Often, clients walk the fine line of needing a coaching and therapeutic approach to move forward. ‘Therapists & coaches can be well-intentioned in ‘fixing’ people, catching them before they hit rock bottom and softening the blow. However, in my opinion, playing a facilitative role with clients to really embrace their pain is a more powerful and effective way to move forward.

The first session I delivered was like coming home for me. My values aligned and I unlocked my purpose.

Research shows that ‘leaning in’ to experiencing and fully living our emotions around these bleak situations, rather than avoiding them, is where deep learning, development & transformational change occurs.

Over the last 15 years, I’ve successfully used performance tools in my coaching to enable people to ‘feel’ again and reconnect with their hearts.

The Genius Dip

Businesses are starting to recognise that using cognitive thinking and rationale alone won’t solve the complexities they face. People are tired, burnt out and some of their most basic needs are compromised. The answer lies in doing business in way that better serves you, your people, your customers and the world.

I have recognised and developed the element of the ‘Genius Dip’ as a powerful part of my coaching method. Creatives and entrepreneurs often suffer this ‘dip’ - a rollercoaster of emotions that comes from being in the spotlight and fully accessible to their audience and which often means immense pressure, responsibility, the sense of having a permanent ‘on’ switch and, often, a feast or famine lifestyle with work and income.

Blending performing Arts and Leadership In a safe space, entrepreneurs and business owners can remove the masks they wear and project to the outside world that they are OK. They can start to feel seen for who they really are and the pressure of forcing a smile while carrying so much the responsibility begins to lift. When they can acknowledge how they are really feeling and the challenges they are truly face, the deep work and change can begin.

It is vital to watch for this ‘genius dip’ and not fight it, but accept its shadow, embrace it and search for the ultimate genius that can ensue as a result. This dip often comes after what can often be experienced as suffering pain, blocks, self-doubt, selfberating and creative constipation. Many will stay here and become stuck; fighting it, resisting it and fearing it will only get worse.

Perfectionism and burnout As a former West End performer playing lead roles in shows such as The Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables, the pressure to deliver a performance worthy of a standing ovation was immense. I coped for a long time but, ultimately, I was unable to navigate eight shows a week and remain sane. I burnt out, got entangled in my thoughts of perfectionism and lost the connection of feeling and experiencing my performance. The struggle to get through my own genius dip was too much. This was less about falling out of love with the business (my belief at the time) and more about my

Richard Tyler is an ANLP and Professional Guild accredited trainer and coach and has studied Cognitive Hypnotherapy, EI, ACT, is a Barrett Values practitioner and currently training in Psychosynthesis Psychotherapy. A bestselling Wiley author with Jolt!, international speaker and ‘Possibility Architect’ he blends conscious leadership with The Arts. He works with senior teams to help unlock healthy and sustainable cultures and with business leaders as a coach and therapist, focusing on emotional and psychological resilience & wellness. richardtyler.co.uk yourmindhygiene.com

A new lens

and navigate their own genius dip and find the curve back up and out again.

Theatre enables people to look through a new lens, get fresh perspectives, drop rational and predetermined thinking and get out of their own way. We often bring in a jazz band into a corporate setting or use actors and improvisation skills to bring everyday scenarios & topics like ‘Change Management’ to life through illustrating what it’s like to be a Possibility Architect!

As coaches, we often meet clients at this painful stage and it’s important not to rescue, save or fix but rather to effectively coach, encourage and support them to stop living on autopilot and start living on purpose. We can provide the safe space for them to remove their mask and be vulnerable, lean in and accept the feelings, rather than avoid or ‘catch’ them.

It’s amazing how people engage so quickly, let go of devices, let go of old stories and start to relax, enjoy and explore. They learn how to ‘feel’ into their outcomes and intentions and can then create new organisational behaviours and activities as a result.

The way to navigate the Genius Dip is through building resilience; developing emotional intelligence, removing the masks and being disciplined about daily rituals. I class this as good ‘Mind Hygiene’ - small, consistent daily habits that have a big impact on our mental and physical health.

Space to embrace This coaching approach helps people become comfortable with their discomfort in order to embrace

“If you are not doing what you love every day... what are you doing?”

VALUES The foundation for k fulﬁling life

hat are values? Values are the unconscious ﬁlters that affect your beliefs and behaviours. They determine your decisions and rely on your ability to be connected to your unconscious mind.

At any level, there’s often misalignment in people and their values. This has many effects but incredible results when the area of values are addressed. Over 20 years ago, I first experienced the power of values. I was running a profitable business that ran smoothly and was also studying an applied psychology degree. I kept noticing personal development courses promising massive life changes and almost miracle-like work. (As a Yorkshireman I was, to say the least, sceptical). Nevertheless, I enrolled on a short weekend course with Tony Robbins, convinced the claims were a total con. I planned to write and report on it from a psychological perspective. Armed with notepad and pen, I was ready to document my findings. Which I never did. Why? One question Robbins asked stopped me in my tracks; “If you are not doing what you love every day... what are you doing?”

It was a true and deep life-changing shift. I made zero notes after that and went home a changed man. I kept pondering… What was I doing? I realised I wasn’t doing what I loved and it had to change. A pivotal moment in which I realised I was so far removed from what was important to me (my values) and had been for years. Taking action,(the mantra of the course) I closed my business pretty much overnight, knowing that it was not important to me anymore. I was passionate about facilitating change for others, so I collaborated with like-minded people. I trained and learned more about the NLP tools and techniques and founded a new coaching business. I later developed into training and certifying people in advanced communication techniques, focusing deeply on re-connecting people to their values. From that day forward, I’ve worked consistently with values applied to people, businesses and cultures.

Stories are the bastion of values Individuals, companies and cultures thrive on stories. The values of a business that sustains growth reﬂect the core values of the founder and it’s the same for an entrepreneur building a business, especially a coaching business. These values are reinforced in stories relating to experiences - and stories of good and bad change points are usually where values strongly emerge. In the same way your stories shape you, your clients and the people around you also have stories that have shaped them and show their values. These are perfect for rapport building, leverage, interventions and fostering better relationships.

Reducing decision latency Coaching is experiencing an upturn due to decision latency. Latency is when something exists but is underdeveloped and causes problems. Decisions are linked to our values and when these are unknown, latency presents which results in frustration, stress and limited results. Values are linked to beliefs, behaviours and decisions so when you are aligned and knows what is important to you, decisions can be made faster with long lasting effects. We are a culmination of all our decisions and making faster decisions consistently fosters wellbeing and growth.

Life changes and so do your values Company values can be relevant for years but for an individual, values and the priority of them can change so the process of re-visiting them is vital. Personal values are more prone to change with time and significant life events. If you are a coach, it is even more important you know your own values and re-visiting your own values should be a regular event on your ‘to do’ list.

Values are pivotal to understand in order to be able to understand yourself and your clients. When things go right, this will be due to a value being upheld, honoured and embraced. When things go wrong this will be down to the lack of a value that, if present, would change everything. Identifying values helps living in the ‘now’ to be positive and fulfilling, makes planning for the future easier and more effective, gives meaning and direction to your life and makes everything you do more rewarding and productive. Put simply: knowing your values leads you to an ultimately happier life and they are your ultimate key to accessing all you want.

John Thompson is Founder of consulting business, Metropolis International and Creator of Agile Coaching for Humans © Studied Applied Psychology, is an ICF / AC Coaching Certiﬁed Trainer, Master Trainer of NLP, Head Coach and Evaluator on NLP Trainers Trainings in UK and Europe. He has coached and consulted for over 20 years internationally, helping organisations and people to foster cultures and loves working with individuals and organisations who disrupt and challenge the status quo. peopleandcultures.com

CHANGING HABITS Why so hard ?

or more than 20 years I have worked with coaches, trainers and HR professionals to amplify their results through using neuroscience in their work, helping them to awaken the brains of their clients for increased self-awareness, emotional engagement and deep transformational change.

phrase. Duhigg suggests experimenting with different rewards, identifying the underpinning cravings that drive the routine bad behaviour. Piggyback off old habits An existing well-travelled neural pathway is far stronger than a new one. Identify if the habit takes place at the same time or in the same location or responds to the same cue all the time? If so, that existing strong neural pathway can be used and accessed to ‘piggyback’ off desired habits to keep and replace those that don’t work. Repetition of the new neural circuit will make it stronger and it will eventually overtake the old one. This is a constant practise and will embed over time so consistency to ‘re-wire’ is key. The brain will want to convert back to the old pathways and this is what makes it hard to change sometimes.

Neuroscience is deepening the scientific understanding of human behaviour and psychology and is beginning to offer some answers for why we behave the way we do. This offers new possibility for coaches to enrich their work and the for clients to Tips to form new habits experience more transformation change in Forming a new habit requires more ‘up-front’ effort to lay down new the area of changing habits that don’t neural pathways. (thoughts) COACH MAGAZINE serve them well. Here are some top tips to share with your coaching clients: Coaching can reveal non-serving READER OFFER 1: Be clear on the motivation for the new habit, their habits and it is useful to explain to WHY - coach them to visualise their success in achieving 5 free sessions available for coaches clients how easily habits embed. their WHY. There are 2 clear neuroscience(1 per coach) on the MyBrain 2: Enjoy the process of learning itself - if they enjoy the based reasons: International neurometric proﬁling new habit they are creating, it will be easier and quicker to tool MiND. Identify your strengths create a new routine. Habits are rewarding and preferences and frame these 3: Mind the language - eradicate ‘should’s’ and ‘can’t’s’ The brain is the most complex using the underpinning neuroscience. from their vocabulary - their narrative must be congruent thing known to man, yet with achieving their goal. Email: neuroscientists are beginning to 4: Focus on doing something not on being perfect - it is gill.mckay@mybrain.co.uk understand some of the basic patterns important to remind themselves that they have taken the action, and physiological reasons for habit they’ve started and they’re on their way to creating new, better formation and change - and it’s all about serving habits in their life. being rewarded. Most people don’t even ever take that first step but if you don’t take a As a behaviour is repeated time and time again, it step you aren’t going to get anywhere. moves from intentional awareness into the older, more instinctive part of the brain. Neurons help to form habits there by releasing dopamine which provides rewarding feedback. Simply put, the habit is repeated to achieve Gill McKay is an NLP Master more of the same reward so stronger neural pathways become embedded to make it easier and more automatic to do it the same way again. Practitioner and ILM qualiﬁed coach with more than 30 years To free up cognitive capacity of coaching, HR and Learning Research has found that more than 40% of our actions performed each and Development experience. day in the same location aren’t conscious decisions, but habits. These habits lock in because the brain is following established patterns. (Think about She is co-founder of MyBrain brushing your teeth - no one stands in front of the mirror debating whether International providing ICF to start on an incisor or a molar!) These routines and automated processes accredited tools and materials to are strategies to free up the brain’s thinking capacity so they can focus on enable coaches and trainers apply neuroscience into goals and engage their intentional thinking. their practice. She is author of the best-selling book Changing habits using the trigger, behaviour, reward loop “STUCK: Brain Smart Insights for Coaches” which Habits are more challenging to change by focusing just on shifting the shares coaching stories and ways clients can create behaviour. It’s important to look at the trigger and the associated reward. change by understanding the neuroscience behind The “trigger, behaviour, reward” loop was popularised in Charles Duhigg’s their presenting issues. excellent book “The Power of Habit” and is a useful tool to offer in mybrain.co.uk coaching. All habits have triggers - a cue which helps the brain to kick into automatic habit mode. Maybe it’s a particular time of day, a person or a

Nicole Posner is a Workplace Mediator and Executive Conflict Coach Practitioner, specialising in the Psychology of Conflict. She works with leaders, teams, managers and individuals to prevent, manage and address conflict and to foster better communication in the workplace. She is author of several published articles on managing workplace conflict and is a regular guest on local radio discussing conflict and communication issues. np-mediation.london

UNDERSTANDING INTERNAL CONFLICT Challenging behaviours are one of the main indicators of stress and frequently the cause of workplace conflict. Lashing out through frustration, using clipped communication styles, sarcasm or micro-managing are all types of behaviours that illustrate an underlying issue bubbling away. In daily life and at work, we can face a myriad of stressful situations and problems to navigate. It’s not always easy and experiencing our own internal conflict adds to this.

s a Workplace Mediator, Conflict Resolution is my niche and I help to facilitate resolution and I’m always very aware and mindful of external and internal conflict in my own life. There was a poignant moment for me earlier in my career that helped me understand more about my own inner conflict and behavior. It was a Friday afternoon on a full flight to Scotland with the usual boarding chaos and a fight for space in the overhead lockers. Passengers were crammed in the aisles searching for a few square inches to squeeze in their hand luggage, pushing and pulling other people’s possessions to fit theirs in. Suddenly, a person next to me roughly shoved my hold all out of the way to accommodate theirs; without any due care or consideration whether there might be something fragile inside. I saw red! I confronted them without thinking first. It escalated. Passengers stared and my husband looked at me in shock - who was this imposter and where had his calm and collected ‘conflict resolution’ wife gone? We worked it out like adults, of course, but I was left with a deep sense of confusion, embarrassment and humiliation that I had behaved so irrationally and out of character. Dealing with the conflict of others was my business. Surely, I should know better? I realised this was my own ‘inner conflict’ and this event had triggered something in me. My reaction was seemingly disproportionate to the actual event but, on reflection, I understood it. One of my highest values is respect

and I considered my bag being shoved out disrespectful which conflicted with my value. Our core values highlight what we stand for, they guide our decisions and actions and if we perceive these to be conflicted in any way, we respond accordingly. When we understand our values better, we can navigate the internal (and external) conflicts better.

How do you manage Internal Conflict? When internal conflict occurs, the key is to understand why by asking questions to help illuminate what’s at the core for you. •Awareness: Start with identifying the reason the situation or event irritated or upset you. Was it the way someone spoke to you, what they said - or didn’t say? Pause and reflect. How did you feel? •What’s behind that feeling? For example, the need for recognition, loyalty, safety, security or support or encouragement. •Consider why that’s important to you. Does recognition make you feel worthy, professional, respected and valued? •Get clarity around how to use this understanding. Do you want to share with others to help them understand your triggers or learn from it to raise your own self-awareness? Take notice of how internal conflict shows up for you. Understand it rather than letting it define, control and consume you - and use it as an opportunity for change, growth and liberation in all areas of your work and life.

MINDFULNESS TO MANAGE ANXIETY AND ACHIEVE A CALMER MIND

e now have a prominent new word in our daily language Covid-19.

Along with this, we also have a daily feast of negative and often disturbing news about the impact of the virus with little certainty or reassurance on how any of this will play out in the months ahead. “May you ﬁnd wholeness Unfortunately, our brain holds a in the imperfection of life. negative bias rather than a positive May the sunrays of kindness one from our evolution and doesn’t shine through the raindrops much care for a daily cocktail of of suﬀering and may the uncertainty and threat. rainbow of compassion bring its healing power to you and For some, it can feel like a meteorite all beings” attacking our sanity where we ruminate, catastrophize; creating low Frits Koster - Mindfulness based Stress Reduction Trainer mood, anxiety and depression from the stories we tell ourselves. But it isn’t what happens to us that causes us to suffer, it’s what we say to ourselves about what happens that causes us to suffer. The negative thoughts are more ‘sticky’ in our brains and can make being positive harder. We all react to these events in different ways; stoicism, despondence, anger, anxious, denial, balanced. Each one of us has a uniquely wired brain based on our own experience and formative years. As a coach and mindfulness teacher, I draw on all my resources to counter my own wobbles and anxiety to create some semblance of equanimity for myself and those around me. These practices, from the world of mindfulness and compassion, can help to increase resilience, positivity and growth mindset and can help in these very testing times.

Jill Savage is a qualified Executive Coach and has a passion for leadership, coaching people to manage their minds, be resilient, thrive and discover who they really are. She delivers Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction programmes for corporates and individuals. Jill holds a diploma in coaching supervision, is accredited with Coaching Supervision Academy, is a Co-Active trained coach and has completed mindfulness teacher training level 2 with Bangor University. Email: jillsavage@btinternet.com

Seven practices for more balance and ease 1 When you are in your head, switch to being in your senses

4 Blessings/Gratitudes exercise To re-dress the negative bias, a lovely exercise before going to sleep is to count three blessings. Reﬂect on three things that happened during the day that you are happy about and why you believe they happened. Write them down perhaps in a special journal and reﬂect on why they have come into your life. The outcome from doing this exercise is astonishing.

If we ﬁnd ourselves in ruminating stories about the impact of Covid-19, then we are in our heads and in our own “narrative.” Once we are aware of what our brains are doing then we can switch our attention to an ‘experiential’ mode where we experience the world through our senses. This may include our feet being planted ﬁrmly on the ground, sitting on a chair, feeling the sun or breeze on your face, noticing the beauty of nature. By switching your attention to your senses, it can make a big difference and nip those catastrophizing thoughts in the bud.

5 Nourishing activities Examine what nourishes you and what depletes you. Think about what lifts your mood, energises you and makes you feel calm and centred? What increases your sense of being alive and present? For me, it’s going for a walk (while we can) being in the garden, reading a novel and doing my (online) dance class and staying connected with loved ones and friends (using all the technology). You may need to get creative and many community online activities will offer ways to engage and support. Seek out what you like and don’t be solo, even if living in your literal single space for a while. Also, think about what depletes you? During this outbreak of coronavirus, I found the news not only depletes me but also stresses me out, so I reduced my intake of it and felt much calmer and centred as a result. Make a list of what nourishes you and what depletes you; increase the nourishing things and reduce the depleting ones. Use physical, mental and emotional boundaries to protect your mindset, health and wellbeing.

2 Soothing Breathing Rhythms If you feel triggered, you will be in your sympathetic nervous system and possibly in hyper-arousal. We feel safer and soothed in our parasympathetic nervous system and one way to do this is to practice a soothing breathing rhythm, where you deepen and slow the breath to about 5 breaths per minute and soften and open at the heart area. The key is to have a smooth in-breath and a smooth out-breath. 5/5 seconds for both is most typical however ﬁnd a count that works for you. You can build up your 5/5 soothing breathing rhythm slowly. For example, Breathe in for 2,3, and then breathe out for 2,3 Breathe in for 2, 3,4 and then breathe out for 2,3,4 Breathe in for 2,3,4,5 and then breathe out for 2,3,4,5 Allow yourself to fall into a natural rhythm on the air coming in through the tip of your nose and deep down into the diaphragm as it rises on the in-breath and falls away on the out-breath.

6 The Pause Learn how to pause. During your day, stop at various points and ask yourself “What is going on for me right now? “How am I feeling right now?” You will stop automatic reactivity and come back to yourself. You can then decide what you need in that moment…a kind action, soothing breathing, connecting to your senses or appreciating something and being grateful.

Choose a narrative for yourself such as “Mind Slowing Down” and “Body Slowing Down” as you keep to a nice even rhythm. Notice yourself becoming more grounded in the body, more soothed and more in balance. You may notice a deeper connection with yourself and a wider perspective and perhaps a wiser action to follow. (credit Professor Paul Gilbert for this practice from his Compassion Focussed Therapy).

7 Stay Connected Nothing gives us more pleasure than being with loved ones, friends and family. It takes us into a content, safe and connected system which is great as an antidote to stress and keeps us mentally well. During self-isolation and social distancing, this is going to be more challenging. However, we have the gift of technology to stay connected to others and, as humans, we ﬁnd ways to adapt. You can use any of these steps at any time to help you regain more control over your emotions in a world where it can be easy to feel out of control. Re-balance, centre and come back to yourself. You can only control yourself.

3 Self-care and a kind wish Offer yourself a daily kind wish or action. Do this in the moment if you notice yourself getting caught up with rumination and stress. A kind action can be anything from a soothing cup of tea in your favourite mug, a nice hot bath, listening to music or eating your favourite food or your hand on your heart saying ‘This too will pass’ Ask; “How can I best take care of myself in this immediate moment?” or “What do I need for myself to be ok right now?”

LEVERAGING THE POWER OF ARCHETYPES In every corner of the globe you’ll find people of diverse shapes and sizes, genetic traits and giftings, viewpoints and values. And yet it’s also true that we all appear to be made of component parts that are common to all - not just in terms of our anatomy but also in our psychology. The Sage Pad is a speaker, author and Leadership Coach who works with corporate executives, company owners, coaches and performing artists. He is the author of TEAM ME that has been acclaimed by such authorities as Brian Tracy and Marcia Reynolds PsyD, former President of the International Coach Federation. Pad has appeared on ITV, BBC World Service, Premier Radio and Radio5 Live and been quoted in The Guardian, The Independent and Telegraph. teamme.app

Wise, intelligent, perceptive and hungry for truth, the Sage is known for their remarkable knowledge and discernment. Rational and logical in their approach, they have a certain detachment from people and events, and tend to be less comfortable expressing their emotions. The Sage seeks a factual understanding of things, searching out hard evidence until they arrive at the truth.

The Mystic

Visionary, creative and enigmatic, Mystics are very good at bringing transformation and evoking change. With an evident delight in mystery, they seem to draw upon unearthly powers of intuition and foresight. They naturally (or is it supernaturally?) spread a sense of hope, and this bigger picture view keeps them stable during crises. The Mystic thinks that life is all about making dreams come true.

The Lover

Lovers feel life deeply. They are trusting and open with others; seeking empathy and harmony with all. Comfortable in expressing their emotions, they are playful and spontaneous; building strong relationships and nurturing connections. Lovers are not just the Romeos and Juliets of the world; they are those whose primary focus is on other people. The Lover thinks that life is all about connection, harmony and true feelings.

The Jester

The Jester excels at ﬁnding the funny side to any situation. Refusing to get too serious, they maintain a light-hearted view of life. They are colourful, playful and unpredictable and they’re determined to live life like it’s all just a game. Boring old rules, rigidity and monotony will often spur them into action often making them appear disruptive. The Jester thinks that life is all about making things fun.

very person of every race, creed, colour and language unconsciously carries something of the essential traits of universally recognised, age-old character types, or ‘archetypes’. Understanding our clients’ dominant archetypes can quickly reveal what’s driving them and how they typically ‘show up’ to tackle every challenge in life.

Type Casting

It’s very important that these different character names are not used as crude ‘labels’ that pigeon-hole an individual into one type. Whilst certain archetypes might naturally deﬁne our general character, we can access any one of them, should we choose to do so.

This collection of archetypes provides six, instantly relatable character types – simplifying a world of complex psychology into memorable, workable metaphors. It provides a balance of ‘left brain’ and ‘right brain’ character types and provides a framework of complementary opposite character types that helps to explain many helpful, and at times perplexing, interpersonal dynamics (very useful when assessing teams).

Stepping Up

With an understanding of the range of archetypes available to them, our client’s path forward hinges on two simple questions. These I recommend they make a regular practice, whenever they face a challenge: “Which archetype is currently calling the shots?” “Which archetype is likely to provide a more effective response?” When they choose to step into that part they are likely to ﬁnd an expanded sense of personal power, capability and conﬁdence.

The Sovereign

Like a king, a queen, a tribal chieftain or a captain of industry, the Sovereign is commanding, decisive and self-assured. Just, fair and supportive, the Sovereign establishes the vision, takes responsibility over their people by providing direction, empowering others and setting fair and positive boundaries.

The Warrior

Warriors take action and accomplish missions. They are direct in their dealings, disciplined, loyal and dependable – prepared to endure pain and driven to ﬁnish the task at hand, whilst guarding important boundaries. They are skilled, capable and competitive and often confrontational. Warriors Life, for the Warrior, is about getting things done.

To gain a deeper understanding of your dominant archetypes and how they can help you in your personal growth and achievement in life, complete your profile for free at http://teamme.app 24

RELAX RELAX RELAX… The mindse to adap

t may sound impossible to be relaxed during the current global crisis but it’s always possible to create your own state by mastering your thoughts and mindset. As a mentor for over 30 years, I have a bank of knowledge help you manage your mind and create solutions within yourself. The world has changed due to the Covid-19 outbreak and unless we accept that and adapt fast, it is going to be a much longer, more painful journey through this crisis. Having your mindset in the right place is the only thing that will serve you and the others around you well at this time and will help you to adapt and relax in terms of what you can and can’t control how we cope with any situation and make a success of it is always entirely up to how we react.

Be strict and take control. Keeping up to date is important and 5-10 minutes of main news a day is sufficient time to absorb any new developments. Make sure you do all you can to filter bad stress and master your internal state.

Get Perspective There can be a natural tendency to think that something is only ever happening to us. In this case, it’s simply not true. The world is suffering and everyone is affected. Understand as fast as you can that we are living in a ‘new normal.’ The ways of weeks ago have ended and we’re in the midst of intense and fast-moving life change. Any situation you face in life needs be put into perspective and there is always another way to look at something, no matter how bad. Looking back, this time could also be one of the greatest opportunities we have had individually and a chance to use our precious time wisely.

The Feeling creates the Result What you think will translate into a feeling and how you make yourself feel will have a powerful impact on how you cope so being relaxed from the core needs to be your one, single goal. All is not bad, it never is. There will always be good, so seek it out and find what you need to help yourself to get into a relaxed state.

Clarity and Goals Trying to get clarity on long term goals is likely to cause more stress in the current situation. The future is going to change rapidly. Not yet knowing what that will look like perpetuates uncertainty and it’s this uncertainty that prevents you from being able to lock in a clear image and create the steps towards that. Creating your clear mental image of your future is what keeps you focused but, with things as they are, your mind can’t settle in the same way as the dominant thought is unclear as to what that mental image looks like. So right now, a series of short-term goals are needed that will take you forward to the other side of this. Then with more knowledge ahead, the medium and longer-term goals can be reconsidered.

Be Grateful This is the time to realise the power of gratitude and being in the moment because we only become truly aware of how grateful we were for something after we lose it. Gratitude is the connection to the universe and this is not a time for envy or wishes, it’s a time to be present, take stock of exactly who you are and who you are going to be - and be it.

The New Beginning You will find your mind adapts quickly once you have reprogrammed it with all the relevant information it needs. The mind is binary and likes to be reprogrammed with yes and no - not if, what’s, maybe’s and ‘don’t knows’ so deal in real and with the truth you face in any given moment. This will keep your mind from ‘scrambling.’ Don’t keep going back to how things were, accept the rules of life have changed and that this is the new beginning.

Croz Crossley is a mindset mentor, author of ‘Tell us Another’ and works with leaders and CEO’s enabling them to master their minds to achieve success and bring their visions to life by following powerful but simple teachings.

Reduce your stress The biggest thing you can do to reduce a great deal of your stress and anxiety is simply this - turn off the news and cut out the noise. There is so much that can easily demand all your time, attention and energy.

croz.uk.com

COACHING THROUGH Coaching is not currently commissioned for patients on the NHS and Fiona Stimson volunteers on a team of coaches who specialise in supporting cancer patients and their families. She is also part of a PhD study being conducted in conjunction with The British Psychological Society to determine cancer coaching standards at The Fountain Centre, a charity within The Royal Surrey Hospital. A cancer diagnosis Many people describe the experience of learning they have cancer as feeling that their world had stopped in that moment. They describe the ‘petrifying’ fear of not knowing what is going to happen, facing surgery and treatments is ‘traumatising’ and levels of fear & anxiety can hit an all-time high. Coaching and the cancer journey Coaching helps cancer patients and their families from diagnosis and treatment to living with, and beyond, cancer, including metastatic disease. Coaching aligns holistically with conventional treatment and other therapies to support and empower patients by being heard and understood. It offers time and space for them to express their feelings without judgement or advice, helps them to build strength and courage, to develop a greater understanding of themselves and their situation and create inner resourcefulness and resilience. Patients can feel many things including a loss of control, acceptance difficulty, anxiety, body confidence issues, loss of identity, fear of the future and survivorship guilt. It’s important to simply ‘be’ with whatever comes up during the coaching process and empathy, kindness and compassion are a key part of the process, alongside an appropriate dose of humour. Positive outcomes through coaching Removing limiting beliefs ‘my mum died of this so I will too’ and similar beliefs can be helped with NLP and other techniques which are used to enable the patient to think and manage in a different, more balanced and positive way.

AND BEYOND CANCER “The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly” - Buddha Reducing Anxiety Understanding and removing negative and unhelpful emotional states, improving mental stability to manage thoughts, feelings, emotions and behaviours.

The mind/body connection is a powerful one through which spiritual, emotional and behavioural factors can contribute to imbalances in the body and it is important to understand and release these, taking action to reestablish balance, help prevent illness and improve health outcomes.

Personal Identity Working through grieving for their ‘old self’ and learning to create a new identity with new possibilities.

“When I first met Fiona, I was in pieces. I didn’t have answers to my questions, I was scared, and this was severely affecting my life and ability to cope. Coaching helped me identify my unhelpful thoughts and behaviours and change my thinking to be more positive and empowering. Change was driven by me to stay on my own journey rather than that of others and I’ve re-wired my old unhelpful habits into new, useful ones and built my mental and emotional strength and capabilities. I’m now able to tune into my unconscious mind, listen to it and work with it to overcome situations I find unsettling” Debbie, Breast Cancer patient

Body Image Building post-surgery confidence, acceptance and appreciation. Work & Career Supporting clients to work during and post-treatment as well as explore career changes. Managing Pain Helping clients manage their pain (sensation) and reducing the way they view and experience it. Staying present When facing a diagnosis of cancer and chronic illness, learning to be in the ‘now’ is key to calmness. Becoming immersed in the intensity of what’s going can be detrimental to wellbeing and mental health so learning to relax, breathe & refocusing attention is valuable.

Fiona Stimson is a Certified Personal Performance Coach and Master Practitioner of NLP & Clinical Hypnotherapy. She coaches clients with cancer and chronic illness, their families and NHS Professionals & Leaders. She is training for her Masters in Coaching, works for The Royal Marsden Cancer Centre and runs her business at The Surrey Psychology Practice. Fiona is an Associate for Working with Cancer, a social enterprise working with those impacted by Cancer and a finalist for the International NLP Awards in the healthcare category. ﬁonastimson.co.uk

Tomas is a professional life coach, speaker, award-winning entrepreneur and NLP Practitioner and uses his core philosophy of ‘OK is NOT enough’ to coach industry leaders, CEOs, high achieving influencers and ambitious professionals to raise standards of their performance and lifestyle. Tomas has been featured in GQ and Vice and is a mentor for the Threshold Accelerator, a 12-month business development course for start-up entrepreneurs run by Dent Global, world leaders in business training. tomassvitorka.com

OK IS NOT ENOUGH

hy is OK not enough and what’s wrong with living an OK life?

or not, you don’t make excuses and procrastinate- you just get on with it and do something about it! The problem is that people do just enough to shift out of the rut then slip straight back into the OK Zone and get stuck again.

Let me ask you: If you went on a holiday and it was just OK, would you go back again? If you watched a movie that was just OK, would you watch it again? If you went to a restaurant and it was just OK, would you eat there again? Probably not… so why settle for living an OK life? Living an OK life may be comfortable and convenient but it's rarely happy, exciting and fulfilling. If you want a fulfilling life where you're getting the best out of it and yourself then you need to embrace this philosophy. People often say to me "I'm doing OK in my personal and professional life, but I'm just not happy. I know I could be so much better. I'm just afraid that one day I'll regret not giving it my best.”. The OK zone sits right between ‘The Winning Zone’ and ‘The Rut’

THE OK ZONE The OK Zone is the most dangerous place to be in because it's comfortable and convenient. There’s no great discomfort or urgency. The OK Zone is about surviving, but not about thriving. Some people settle for doing just enough to be out of the rut and stay at the bottom of the OK zone in tolerable discomfort. Yes, life or the situation hurts a bit but not enough to do something about it. Intense pain is often the driver for change in this zone but some people seek to just not be uncomfortable, settling for playing it safe their whole life. Changing the channel on the TV a million times before thinking of one thing they can do instead to improve their own life! It's not just a tagline, it's a philosophy and an attitude to life. Believing OK is not enough doesn’t mean you are greedy or never satisfied. It's about never being satisfied with less than you believe you're truly capable of. It's about prioritising fulfilment over comfort, growth over mediocrity, thriving over surviving. It’s about refusing to live with knowing that you could do more, be more and have more of what life has to offer. It’s about what could happen if you really tried, really dared, gave it your best, defied your fears and limitations and got out of your OK zone.

THE WINNING ZONE The best place to be is in the winning zone because when you're there, life is exciting, you see results, have momentum and believe in yourself. It may not always be easy, but it's thrilling and fulfilling and your mind sees possibility and opportunity rather than scarcity and limitation.

THE RUT Contrary to what you may think, when it comes to growth and making improvements to your life, the second best place to be can be the rut. Why? Because when things get really bad, you no longer ask yourself whether you feel like doing something about it

Megan Hudson trained at the University of Stellenbosch’s Business School and is a marketing and business coach specialising in working with coaches and solopreneurs to help them find and define their niche and market their businesses effectively. She is also a qualified Time to Think practitioner and former Insights practitioner and facilitator. nicheintelligence.co.za

NICHE INTELLIGENCE To Niche or not to Niche? The ultimate question for the modern coach

’ve spent almost 2 decades in coaching and marketing. When I began my career there were so few coaches in the industry that the differential of business, life, or executive coaches was sufﬁcient.

Ikigai The core of your niche is whatever makes you leap out of bed in the morning to do the work you are passionate about and this is the foundation of the Japanese concept of Ikigai. Ikigai was first identified in studies of longevity that identified “blue zones” or communities of people whose populations regularly lived to 100 years or more. Ikigai is a Japanese concept meaning “a reason for being” and it’s the sweet spot at the centre of your mission, passion, profession and vocation. It embodies and draws on what you love, what the world needs, what you can be paid for and what you are good at. Begin by asking yourself these questions: • What do I love?•What am I good at? •What does the world need (that I can offer)?•What can I be paid for? This is how to begin the niching journey and once you start eliciting these answers, you will be able to start defining your sweet spot, start marketing effectively and attracting the clients you love to work with and who need you. In conclusion, clearly defining your niche is the single most effective thing you can do to future-proof, crash-proof, bulletproof and recession-proof your coaching practice.

That has changed completely, with coaching having been identified as being one of the fastest growing industries in the world. The demand for niche is high and also very necessary. LinkedIn has more than 2,750,000 people describing themselves as business coaches, so coaches must differentiate in some way in order to stand out, now and in the future, in order to serve clients who may not know where to begin in their search for a coach amongst all these numbers. If the coaching description isn’t clear and explicit, how is a potential client expected to recognise themselves and their needs and understand what options they have to work through them? It’s important to clearly define the true value and specific results you achieve with your clients: this sweet spot is your niche.

Clarity of message Clarity in your niche is all about being succinct in your messaging and communications. Stating what you do simply, quickly and clearly, making it easy for a potential client to understand and be able to identify if it’s the type of coaching they need and want. Pre-niche, many worry that defining their coaching niche will limit their business but, actually, it will only serve to enhance it and increase the chances of attracting and working with new clients. No niche is too small - if it’s yours!

‘Ikigai… a reason for being’

How to deﬁne your niche Treat it as a journey and not a destination and your niche will naturally evolve as you coach and achieve results in specific areas. My original niche was as a Business Coach, then I niched to Marketing Coach and as clients achieved great results, I niched even more tightly into a Niche Marketing Coach! The cornerstone of effective marketing is being able to be clear and specific about the services and products on offer and this means clear definition and regular refinement of niche based on professional practice and results which then guide and define the niche.

OVERCOMING FOOD ADDICTION The taboo of dysfunctional eating

ome *5% of the population have a food addiction - an urge, desire and compulsion to eat for other reasons than physical hunger. 4.2% of women have bulimia and 3.5% of women suffer with BED (Binge Eating Disorder).

The undigested story

While those statistics sound small, consider this: 75% of UK women are currently on or are about to start a diet and 91% of women say they do not like their bodies.

They may feel unfulfilled due to circumstances and past decisions or have an inability to forgive either someone, something or themselves. Issues of abuse (which may or may not be in the open yet) can be present or they may have experienced trauma that created pain which, in turn, created a need for protection.

Sufferers often connect their self-worth to the number on the scales or external measures of success or achievement, yet they may be holding onto anger, resentment and rage which has been ‘eating’ them from the inside for decades.

My story My own dysfunctional relationship with food began at the age of 14. I wanted to lose a bit of weight, believing it would help me feel better about myself. I had no idea this would be a slippery slope into the world of food obsession and compulsive behaviour around food that lasted over a decade.

Many women have used food as an emotional crux for years as it soothes, comforts, supports, numbs and suppresses a wide range of feelings and emotions – these are their ‘undigested stories’ and these undigested life events can affect their relationship with food and with themselves.

I binged, purged, weighed, measured and tracked everything I ate. Then after a traumatic relationship break-up, I spiralled into social anxiety, depression and food dysfunction.

Many clients experience feeling abandoned whether by friends, partners or parents. Those experiences can remain active in their psyche and energy and can be re-activated and re-triggered with surprising ease. The result being, every time they feel abandoned in any form, they have an urge to binge or misuse food to comfort and soothe.

During this time, my life was on hold (it takes a lot of time and emotional energy to maintain a disordered relationship with food) but with the help of professional coaches and therapists over many months, I rebuilt my relationship with food, until it was no longer my focal point and obsession holding me in a cycle of selfdestruction.

This is merely the symptom of the undigested story (not wanting to feel abandoned) which is true for all manner of addictions and compulsive behaviour.

It’s not about the food Conventional thinking around resolving addictive eating issues can often focus on the food itself in the form of meal plans, nutritional plans and abstinence and/or elimination.

By getting beneath the triggers and starting to unravel the emotions, a permanent solution can be found through healing, coaching and therapy. The Food Addiction Recovery Method™ is rooted in therapeutic coaching, healing modalities, mindfulness and embodiment practices and, in using these, we get beneath the triggers and start to unravel the emotions to find a permanent solution and, as a result of my own personal experience and years as a professional, I know these three things to be true:

Yet the truth is that food addiction is rarely about food. That’s just the symptom. Underneath the addiction are the common the drivers of pain and unresolved trauma and that’s why my approach to addictive eating, food obsession and binge eating blends therapy, coaching and eating psychology plus the Food Addiction Recovery Method™ framework I’ve created after working in this area for almost 12 years.

You can heal your wounds. You can change how things feel and you can re-write your story.

*Statistics derived from data published by The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), Beat and Anorexia & Bulimia Care)

Rachel Foy is a Food Addiction Recovery Coach, Eating Psychology Consultant & Clinical Hypnotherapist Author, BSc (Hons) Dip Hyp. She is the creator of The Food Addiction Recovery Method™, a speaker, host of ‘The Hungry Soul’ podcast and founder of Soul Fed Woman. soulfedwoman.com

“You can heal your wounds. You can change how things feel and you can re-write your story”

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Finding Your Own North Star: Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live Martha Beck Do you feel that your life has taken a wrong turn and you don't know how to get back on track? This book provides a step-bystep programme to help you on course again. It shows you how to recognise your deepest desires, examines why they have been forgotten and then gives practical advice on how to fulfil them. Repair unconscious beliefs and emotional wounds that may block you. A map to guide you through your life changes with motivation throughout.

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BUSINESS

YO U R G U I D E TO P R O F E S S I O N A L C O A C H E S , M E N TO R S , C O N S U L TA N TS & T H E R A P I STS .

Teresa Brooks

Business & Communication Coach, NLP Practitioner Helping entrepreneurs and professional coaches to build a thriving and rewarding business. teresabrookscoaching.com

Megan Hudson

Alison Coates

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Marketing and Business Coach

Inspiring Performance through emotional intelligence coaching focused on building awareness. coaching@alisonjcoates.com revoconsultant.com

Working with coaches and solopreneurs to help them define their niche and market their businesses effectively. nicheintelligence.co.za

Nicole Posner

Karen Kissane

Life Coach, Business Coach and Mentor

Executive Conflict Coach and Workplace Mediator

ICF Accredited Life & Business coaching for ambitious people.

Helping people resolve conﬂict and foster better communication in the workplace.

karenkissanecoaching.com info@karenkissanecoaching.com

nicole@posner.london np-mediation.london

Steve Payne

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Pad Pax

Ruth Kudzi

Chanelle Segerius-Bruce

Business Mentor and Mindset Coach

Business Coach & Online Branding Specialist

Helping coaches and consultants scale their businesses and make more sales. ruthkudzi.com

Kevin George

Helping entrepreneurs build a strong online brand. segeriusbrucecoaching.com

John Thompson

Success and leadership Coach, Speaker & Author

Human Performance Coach, Psychotherapist, NLP practitioner

Working with with corporate executives, company owners, coaches and performing artists internationally. teamme.app

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I use emotional literacy to develop an intellectual heart.

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kevin-george.com

peopleandcultures.com

Matthew Radley

Founder and Executive Coach Executive 1:1 & Team Coaching. Professional Coach Training matthewradley.co.uk matt@matthewradley.co.uk

Michelle Yeoman

Richard Tyler

Chief Possibility Architect of BTFI Ltd

Change Management, Transition and Wellbeing Coach and Consultant Helping you to negotiate change, reduce stress and prevent burnout.

Supporting people in business with their #MindHygiene to live a life ON Purpose.

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btﬁleadership.com

C L I C K H E R E TO L I ST Y O U R B U S I N E S S I N T H E D I R E C TO RY.

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Business Coach

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Gill Mckay

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Keith West

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Helena Holrick Founder & Coach at Helping You Shine Supporting, training, teaching, coaching and guiding you to lead yourself and your business to shine. helpingyoushine.com

LIFE

jaimiesarah.com

Claire Brumby

Nina Madden

Jill Savage

NLP Master Coach, Trainer of NLP & Coaching

Qualified executive coach and mindfulness teacher

Helping smart and passionate people change their lives.

Enabling people to manager their minds and brains, be resilient, thrive.

ninamadden.com

linkedin.com/in /jillangelasavage/

Sarah Rose Bright

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Beth Hope Executive Confidence Coach Building authentic confidence for a successful life & career. andhope.co.uk beth@andhope.co.uk

Tomas Svitorka

Jean-Pierre De Villiers

Life coach, speaker, NLP Practitioner

Peak Performance Coach, NLP Practitioner, Speaker and Author.

Coaching industry leaders, CEOs and entrepreneurs to raise standards of performance and lifestyle.

Working with high performing business leaders and champions who demand the best from themselves.

tomassvitorka.comÂ

jeanpierredevilliers.com

Issy Harvey

Rachel Foy

Personal Development & Change Coach

Food Addiction Recovery Coach, Eating Psychology Consultant & Clinical Hypnotherapist

Workshops, training and team development. vibrantchange.co.uk Issy@vibrantchange.co.uk

Helping women overcome eating disorders. soulfedwoman.com

Fiona Stimson Certified Personal Performance Coach. NLP Master Practitioner & Clinical Hypnotherapist Coaching clients with cancer and chronic illness. fionastimson.co.uk

Kate Southerby Executive coach Helping you achieve your highest potential by coaching with the brain in mind. Kate@iammecoaching.com iammecoaching.com

Natalie King

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Wellness Business Growth Coach

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Mark Henderson

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Founder & Consultant at Speaker INsight

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TEDx speaker Coach, Business & Marketing Strategist

Steve Dent Mental Toughness Coach & Trainer, NLP Master Practitioner

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Ruth Elkins

Mindset Master for Business

Communications Consultant

& Personal Growth

PR, Media, creative content & copywriting.

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Bonita Ackerman du Preez

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sallygarozzo.com

johnkennycoaching.com

Bemoore.uk

future-edgecoaching.co.uk

Accredited, Recognised, Professional & Ethical Coach Training. Experiential training to develop your skills alongside knowledge Accredited NLP Diploma and Coaching Skills training Exclusive access to support & mentors Lifetime access to training modules Continued post-training support & CPD Professional Coach Training

Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just be a Coach...

Be a Professional Coach.

ACT - Association for Coaching & Accredited Training Successful coaching and training experts committed to your professional development.

taoct.uk

COACH - The Professional Coaching Magazine to Empower, Educate & Inspire - APRIL 2020

Articles inside

THE GENIUS

OVERCOMING FOOD ADDICTION T he taboo of dysfunctional eating