From the Editor
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ebruary is a month full of events especially for those in the New Orleans metropolitan area. Superbowl XLVII, Valentine’s Day and Mardi Gras are very indulgent holidays and we are here to keep our readers focused while having fun. This issue, we want our readers to love while loving themselves and there is no better way to execute this than to take care of your mind, body and soul.
Malcolm Armstrong Jr.
This month we present are several ways you can take care of yourselves and others this Valentine’s Day sexually, physically and mentally. Be sure to check out our newest contributor Cory Turner and his article which contains tips on how to find the right fitness center for you. Also check out our new Sexual Health section which discusses intimacy in early stages of relationships with special attention on how to celebrate that first Valentine’s day as a couple. We want our readers to utilize this trifecta of holidays to better themselves and become the best individuals (and couples if applicable) they can be this month. Contact us, engage with us and advertise with us.
Think Mind, Think Body...Think YOU! Yours in #WELLNESS, Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr. Founder & Chief Editor marmstrong@cognitionmagazine.com Follow us on twitter: @cognition_mag Like us on Facebook: Facebook.com/ cognitionmagazine
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2. Editor’s Note 3. Introductory Special 8. Psychology Behind Seduction 12. Health & Fitness 13. Real Thoughts 14. Ask Dr. Ada 16. Exclusive Interview with Rantz Davis 19. Love & Relationships 20. What Blacks Should Know 23. Be Inspired
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The
Psychology behind
Seduction
By: Paris Hughes
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I
chose exotic dancing, to work in an industry that is condemned by most as sexist, degrading women when they are exploited by men to cater to their t’s a fine game of dancing to arouse the
fantasies.
senses, and showing excess skin in a culture where
“I think my biggest influence to become an exotic
the exposed human body is still stigmatized. The
dancer was my godmother,” Candy explained,
game is exotic dancing, in which women master the
providing other factors that motivated her decision
art of seduction, creating the ultimate visual fantasy
to become an exotic dancer. “She was always so
for men of all backgrounds. Or rather, it’s a not an
flawlessly beautiful…educated, articulate. She never
art you can master, but a sort of “baby I was born
danced, but was always waited on hand and foot by
this way” kind of trait. So says my old friend from
men, adored & worshipped by them to the point of
high school, “Candy” who is now living in Wiscon-
her being bought cars, houses, and everything she
sin, and is a part time exotic dancer, full time escort. could dream of… I wanted to be an exotic fantasy “It’s genetic, something you’re born with,”
adored by men [too]. I didn’t even know what a
explained Candy. “I feel you either have it or you
stripper was at that point, but later in life I sure
don’t. The best actress [without ‘it’] can’t convince
found out.”
a man she wants to be with him and won’t [seduce]
She explains that while the money is a nice feature,
him into giving her money.”
with her being able to set her own hours, and still
Exotic dancing, “stripping”, lap dancing, it’s all the
make up to four thousand dollars “on a bad month,”
same name for a profession that is all part of the
it seems that her main reason for loving this job is
adult entertainment industry. And despite the fact
the admiration she receives from men, who will
that women who work in this business are usually
view her, and other ladies, as some great fantasy that
shunned by society, many women continue to pursue they may not seek in most other social settings. it; millions of men, ranging from construction
But many would argue that a million male admirers
workers, to doctors, lawyers, maybe even your next
wouldn’t tempt them into this world, arguing that
door neighbor or brother in law, venture to strip
it’s exploits women when they make money off of
clubs to enjoy the arousing services. Candy explains being viewed as nothing more than a sex object. But that men love the fantasy behind the women’s danc- Candy and many other women in this line of work ing, enjoy being aroused by something different
do not feel that they are being exploited; in fact,
from what they see every day, so that explains why
many would say it’s the men that are the victims
men go to the strip clubs on Bourbon Street just to
here.
watch a striptease.
According to one famous study—the first major
But what drives women into the scorned profession? study on lap dancing, conducted by Dr. Teela No one can believe that a woman would willingly
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Sanders and Kate Hardy from the University of
Leeds—most exotic dancers came into exotic dancing money, and a wonderful lifestyle off a man’s by choice, and many did not feel exploited.
voyeuristic desires?
“These young women do not buy the line that they are exploited, because they are the ones making the
Or perhaps, neither sex has achieved power from
money out of a three minute dance and a bit of chat,”
exotic dancing. As in other forms and alternatives of
Sanders explained in an article from UK’s The
sexuality, it’s an ongoing squabble among the two
Independent.
genders, as they both try to assert their power over the other, one using their body, the other using money and
Another study conducted by Old Dominion University’s Department of Sociology and Criminal Justice, noted that one dancer called the male customers “suckers” for giving the dancers money for just being sexually attractive. The dancers feel that it’s the men that are being exploited instead, since they are separating them from their hard-earned cash. And for doing what? Seducing them, and then not following through on an act. But in this line of work, it’s hard to make sense, to really say who’s using who in this business. Is it the woman being exploited when they are reduced to just skin, breasts, and fantasies for men? Or are the women really in control, when they achieve a large sum of
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dominant standards of what’s attractive, to control.
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Health & Fitness Joining the Right Fitness Center Can Alleviate the Wrong Kind of Pain By: Cory Turner
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4. If you travel often, you might want to use a facility t’s one month that provides accessibility to its members throughout into the New the country. Find out if the prospective gym offers a Year and how program allowing for free or discounted rates for are your members during travel. resolutions looking? It has to be somewhere on most people’s list of goals is to lead a healthier lifestyle. To accomplish this, many make the decision to join a fitness center. With so many choices, it is often hard to choose which one is the best for you. When searching for that perfect gym, there are several considerations. 1. Consider what equipment you want to use. Cardio equipment (elliptical machines, treadmills, and cycles) is some of the most used equipment in most gyms. Make sure that there is an adequate number of machines that you want to use, as if there are not enough, you might become quickly disappointed when they are all being used by other members. The same goes for all other equipment, as well, including free weights and weight machines. Make sure the equipment suits your needs, both now and in the future. 2. Check for general cleanliness and lack of clutter. Free weights should be in a designated area if not being used, and should not be scattered around the floor of a facility if not in use. Bathrooms and shower facilities should be clean. Equipment should appear clean and well-maintained. 3. Pay attention to hours of operation. Take your personal schedule into account. Some centers are open 24 hours a day; others are not and offer schedules that might conflict with work and family obligations.
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Real Thoughts
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By:
Why cant I find a Good Man?
o ladies I know if you're anything like me, you don't claim to be some manner of great fashionista but SOME of us out there have no idea how to dress ourselves whatsoever. PeoDeanna Theriot ple will often throw out the platitude "The woman makes the clothes. The clothes don't make the woman." In the context of this conversation, such a blanketed statement could not be further from the truth. The truth is that it is all too easy for the clothes you wear to make you appear to be the type of nonsense that you don't claim yourself to be (i.e., a hoe of the bargained sort). When you go to Rainbow, Rave and It's Fashion and raid the $5 rack without taking into account that some things (no matter how frugal) aren't always a steal of a deal, you'll pay for it later when you are met with many stares of disapproval. Don't get me wrong, I'm broke as a joke. But I still know what looks good on me and what makes me look like I just crawled off the avenue. In this economy, it is a very good idea to be conscious of one's spending, but when it comes to the way you wish to be perceived by the opposite sex, some corners should not be cut so sharply. Even if you shop in those higher end retail stores that generally are NOT found in strip malls, everything that looks good on the rack may not translate as clearly when applied to your frame. When you are on the hunt for a "good man", what is the VERY first thing he will see? That's right--your outer appearance. So if you look like a skeezer what else is there to lead a man to any other conclusion about your dateability? Do you think he'll really give you the opportunity to open your mouth and prove him right? Why bother? You're probably just as dumb as you look wearing those tight, unflattering clothes that REEK of delusions of grandeur. With that in mind, how do you think a man would naturally approach such an obviously indiscriminate woman? Correct answer: With hard dick and bubble gum. That's all a hoe really needs to survive in this world anyway. Pimpin' takes care of the rest. Therefore, you will often be met with "pimp game" when view in such an unsavory light. Of course there are some indiscriminate men out there who will undoubtedly approach ALL 13
women the same way, no matter how she looks but a "good one" may not approach you at all. Additionally, ladies, some of us are not being honest with ourselves about our SIZE. I know it's a truly fucked up feeling when you put on those 14s and they feel a little bit more snug than you remember but we mustn't shy away from the reality of the situation. You can't make them thangs fit like they used to no matter how much "give" they have. Just because you can still put it on doesn't mean that you SHOULD. Trust me you'll be more attractive in the right size than you are squeezed uncomfortably into the wrong one. Not only does it tell a man that you're lying to yourself about how you look, it also shows that you've let yourself go. Do yourself a favor and don't EVER let a man see too much of what the future would hold for him in the event that he would consider a longterm arrangement with you. We all know that one day we all will most likely put on some pounds as we age but damn, at least let the man enjoy how you look NOW. And if it seems as though I'm leaning too much toward the male point of view, consider this ladies: Would you be running into the arms of a man who was dressed like he just rolled out of bed and lazily decided that whatever he had on was sufficient for any occasion? Would you rest your future in the hands of a man who looked like he borrowed his little brother's t-shirt and his sister's jeans? Would you procreate with another human being who was obviously so careless and jaded? Maybe you would... which is why you can't find a good man. (BE FOR REAL DISCLAIMER: I ain't sayin' I got it all together my damn self but that doesn't mean I don't know shit. So if this offends you, then I must speaking directly to you. You can either get on your game or get off my damn page. It's up to you ma'am.)
Ask Dr. Ada Dr. Ada Craig Roberson is a dedicated wife, mother and advocate for those in need. She is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker within the state of Louisiana and holds a doctoral degree in Counseling Psychology. Ada has a wealth of experience in working with disadvantaged individuals and has taken the term “Life Enhancement” into a whole new meaning within the social services industry. Her ability to truly understand human behavior has allowed her to transform the lives of many individuals, some of which were hopeless in the eyes of society. She loves a good piece of fine chocolate, a good challenge and stimulating activities. If you have an issue you would like to bring to Dr. Ada’s attention please email askdrada@cognitionmagazine.com or make a post on the Ask Dr. Ada page on www.cognitionmagazine.com
Dr. Ada Craig Roberson
Sensi: Is it ok to feel euphoric when meditating? I feel very strong sensations throughout my body and it’s almost like a euphoric effect.
Sensi, An individual’s response to meditation typically differs from person to person. We are all unique individuals that have unique reactions to meditation. The one thing that seems to consistent is that the effects of meditation seem to be positive. So, to answer your question, it is absolutely ok for you to feel euphoric when meditating.
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Susie Q: I am currently living with my mother who happens to have Dissociative Identity Disorder. She has been diagnosed as bi-polar. She refuses to seek treatment and can be a burden on me and my family. Can you give me some advice as to deal with her outbursts and melt downs? Susie Q, Since your mother has been diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder and Bi-Polar, it is important that you understand that you’re not only living with someone with a personality disorder, but also a co-occurring mood disorder. Personality disorders are typically treated with certain types of therapy (i.e. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) and can be tough to treat, while mood disorders are typically medicated in conjunction with therapy. Without treatment, your mother’s behavior is unlikely to change. Living with someone with untreated severe and persistent mental illness can be very emotionally draining. If you are unable to assist her with seeking treatment, it may be a good idea for you to seek out a support group for adult children of parents living with mental illness. You may also want to consider moving out on your own as to create some healthy distance between you and your mom. I’m Wondering: As the year ends, there has been a lot of theories as to the end of the world and a new world order. A lot of information has come to light about the corruption and satanic nature of the entertainment and political industry. I have come across several links that discuss Mk Ultra and Mind Control. What is your take on the shattering of the core personality and the ramifications of the consequences? Wondering, The exploration into mind control and the shattering of core personalities is a highly specialized field of study of which I am not expert.
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C One on One With
Rantz davis Interview by: Malcolm Armstrong Jr. Images by: Q. Bleu Photography Styled By: Vernon Clothing & Smooth 16
ognition Magazine sits down one on one with New Orleans’ very own Rantz Davis. This brother is talented, stylish and got the ladies singing all of his tunes. We cover his career, upcoming projects and struggles to win in the R&B game. Read, enjoy and be inspired.
CM: Tell us about the singer that is Rantz Davis? RD: Rantz Davis is an artist with a unique, southern New Orleans swag who prides himself in making great, undeniable quality music and is determined to be one of the best to ever do it. He doesn't want to be known as just a great R&B artist, but a great artist and entertainer period. CM: How did you come up with the name “Rantz”? RD: Haha. I get asked this a lot. We may need to give my mom’s a call right quick to answer this one. Honestly, it's room and then I would later go home and my birth name.
research to
find out who these songs were from.
CM: It’s no secret that you are a New Orleans native. CM: When did you first discover your talent for singTell us about your upbringing in NOLA. RD: I grew up in a two parent household in the Hollygrove neighborhood of the 17th ward. I remember the first artist my mom and dad had me listening to while riding in the car with them was Michael Jackson. He was literally the only artist I would listen to as a child. That's
ing? RD: Well I've been singing since I was a preschooler, but I knew I could REALLY sing when I was in the first grade. I remember being in music class and my teacher noticed that my voice was a lot more in tune than the rest of the kids. She had me sing a solo in front of the school
when I first really discovered my love for music. Even though education was their main concern for me, my mom and dad have been supporting my dream of being an artist from the beginning and I sincerely owe them so much for that. They always taught me that I could achieve anything I wanted to if I put my mind to it. I was also a member of the Marching 100 playing trumpet at St. Augustine High
and they went crazy! After that I knew I had a gift.
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CM: What initial steps did you take to launch your music career here in NOLA? RD: It's all about networking. I had no money, no famous siblings or anything; just me and my songwriter V. Script, who’s actually my cousin. We got out in the streets and started networking at several events and
School. As we all know, NOLA is the birthplace of jazz and I was heavily exposed to it there. Being in the band influenced my musical abilities to come up with harmonies and melodies and also put me up on game
eventually came across producers, managers, radio personalities, promoters, etc. From that point on I started building a team around me that was 100% all about helping me building my brand and my music. You must have a great team behind you because you can't do and think of everything yourself all the time. Once I got the right team it was on from there.
with the old school classics. We used to play those songs in the band
Atlanta, Ga? RD: I've achieved a lot of great things being in New Orleans. I hit Billboard twice, won numerous local
CM: What made you decide to expand your career to
awards, and even received my own Pandora station. However, I'm still not satisfied with those achievements
school and he is my main influence in music. When it comes down to R&B music of my generation, no one
even though they're great. I felt like I needed to expand does it better. Other dream collabs would be Usher, my brand to a bigger market in order to be seen and heard Jay-Z, Kanye West, and Drake. by a bigger audience. It was time for me to step out on faith and get to the next level. CM: What do you do to prepare before going into the studio? CM: How did you handle the criticisms of your move RD: I do several vocal warm-ups, make sure I have bottle of room temperature water, and just get myself to Atlanta? RD: Some people felt a certain kind of way because of mentally in touch with exactly what the song is about so my move, but it didn't faze me at all. I pretty much just the delivery of the song I'm recording is where it needs to ignored it. I understand their concerns, but I need them to understand and see the bigger picture of all this. My move to Atlanta is not only to help myself but to represent the talent of New Orleans. My goal is to let people in Atlanta know that New Orleans has a lot of talent and that they need to come check us out ASAP! CM: What are some of the pressures of being an implant artist in the A? RD: The only pressure I would say there is would be the pressure to prove that you are a star and to show what makes you different from everyone else in the A that's doing music. However, I'm extremely confident in my artistry and my team. It's just a matter of us just working and doing what we do best. CM: What other local New Orleans artists have you collaborated with? RD: I've collaborated with Dee-1, 3D Natee, Kourtney Heart, Alania, and a few others. I try to support and help other artists from home as much as possible, especially if I see them on a similar grind that I'm on. I think it's extremely important to do that because that's the best way for us as a city and local music scene to be put on and heard collectively. We need to help each other get to the top and show the world who has the best talent! CM: Describe your dream music collaboration(s)? RD: My #1 dream collaboration would be a song with R. Kelly! I've been a huge Kellz fan since I was in middle 18
be. CM: We see that you are a pretty fit guy. Tell us about your fitness regimen. RD: My regimen is pretty simple. I work out at least three times a week. However, the most important thing is your diet. Eat lots of fruits, vegetables, fish, and turkey. I try to stay away from as many fried and fast foods as possible. Allow yourself a cheat day at least once a week though. You'll go crazy if you don't. Trust me! CM: What new projects do you have coming up? RD: I'm releasing a new EP called "Evolution" in February! Lately I've been studying and learning a lot on how to expand my brand and enhance myself as an artist. I feel that this new project will showcase how much I've grown and evolved. The first single from the new project is dropping on January 25th. It's called "Livin' It Up" and I can't wait for you guys to hear it. CM: How can we find out more about Rantz Davis? RD: Make sure to follow me on Twitter and Instagram at @rantz_davis. My Facebook is facebook.com/rantzdavis. Subscribe to my YouTube at YouTube.com/rantzdavis. Also visit my website at www.rantzdavis.com.
Love & Relationships Spread the Love
Alanna McCreary
not the day to drop the ”L” word; find another time. Don’t overdo it or underwhelm you new love interest as you are setting the bar for future V-days, and holidays alike. If you have been with your significant other for a while and want or need to celebrate Saint Valentine’s Day, be February is a full month. In bold and thoughtful but unique. No one wants the cookie additions to the regular birthday and cutter gestures. Maybe hire a cleaning service and have anniversary celebrations we your boos house cleaned top to bottom and prepare their celebrate Black History Month, favorite meal. Or find that record they have been looking Ground Hogs Day, Super Bowl, for that seems impossible to get. Cater the day to them so Mardi Gras, Ash Wednesday/Lent, that your intentions are authentic and real. If you are
Presidents' Day, and Valentine’s Day. Each holiday or celebration this month means something different to different people but one of the universal eye rolls is the celebration of Valentine’s Day. It's not that we as a society don't like romance or chocolates and flowers but no one wants to feel obligated to give them, especially if it is
single, don’t fret this day is for you too. While it may seem of feel like this day is for couples only, revel in the fact that you are fabulous and enjoy the love that is all around. It is true that as a single person the
Valentine’s day sensation gets compounded and can be expected. Even worse no one wants to be reminded of the slightly disappointing with all the commercials, candied lack of romance in his or her life. More often than not you hearts, balloons, and corny stuffed animals plastered in hear commentary that Valentines is an existential consumer every supermarket, corner store and restaurants being holiday and it means nothing in real time. It’s forced and “reservation only” to be a singleton, but it doesn’t have to. any gesture should be dismissed. While that is one Grab some friends, make a delicious meal and watch some approach it is a bit extreme. Perhaps we should tone back favorite classic movies. Or glam up and hit the town, many on the common or expected acts and think outside of the clubs and bars notoriously have singles parties. Even better box. Put more of an emphasis on love ad what it means to news this is a great time to meet single people because all love one another. Chocolates and candies are nice, and the couples are off doing couple things while us singletons getting dressed up for a night out with your boo is fun then really can live it up and celebrate the joys freedom and why is it mostly expected on this day? While we cannot pleasure of meeting new people and keeping things light change traditions, expectations, or even reactions we can and fresh. make cognitive choices to address the days dreaded holiday in more meaningful ways. Our attitudes and feelWhatever your relationship status is this Valentine’s Day, ings about the day are completely up to us, which is good don’t fall in the trap of commercialism. Do what feels right news as we are bombarded with the over the top pink, red, for you and focus on love, whether that’s with a significant and white hearts. Challenge yourself to be positive and other, with friends or yourself. show the love, even in small ways: even if that just means smiling at people. If you are in a relationship be sincere and thoughtful in your V-Day plans, think past dinner, flowers and candy. If you are in a new relationship this is 19
For dating or relationship advice email AJ McCreary at amccreary@cognitionmagazine.com
What Blacks Should Know
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Can Stress be Good for Us? By: Malcolm M. Armstrong Jr.
e all know that stress can cause negative affects upon the human body both mentally and physically but who says that it has to be all bad? Believe it or not stress can have beneficial qualities. Psychologist and other health experts divide stress into two categories which are Eustress and Distress. If you really sit back and think about it, how many times have you performed your best while under pressure? The added stress of knowing that you have to give your all and/or finally meet that deadline prompts us to strap up our boots and work harder to achieve our goals. The pressure to perform can bring out the best in us but excessive and consistent stress can cause its malignant qualities to affect us. Here is how to distinguish good stress from bad stress: Eustress (Good Stress): Helps you to achieve goals and meet expectations Increases planning skills Boosts memory Serves as a warning sign for the body to avoid dangerous/uncomfortable situations Boosts immune system Improves heart functioning Distress (Bad Stress): Prevents sleep or causes excessive sleep Provokes mood swings Lowers immune system functioning Causes abnormal eating habits (too little or too much) Causes medical difficulties that vary from headaches to ulcers According to webmd.com over 43% of adults suffer from adverse health issues resulting from stress and 75% - 90% of all doctor visits are a result of stress related ailments. Be sure to fill your life up with eustress “good stress” and to avoid the bad stress. Use this resource to ensure that you know the difference to maintain your best mental functioning. For more information on stress and its effects on the human body visit: http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/effects-of-stress-on-your-body 20
Sexual Health
S
6 Tips for Initial Intimacy o its your first Valentine’s day together and you want to go the extra mile with your new love. Let us help you to make the best sexual health decisions possible during this time.
1. It’s ok to not have sex on Valentine’s Day. You do not have to end every romantic evening with sex. Just because its Valentine’s Day does not mean you have to replicate a steamy romance novel. Let’s face it, Valentine’s Day is on a week day this year and after work most people are tired. You will most likely get off of work at 5pm, sit in traffic, and stand in the checkout line for that perfect gift and then sit in Olive Garden for 5 hours with other highly dressed disgruntled couples...you’re tired once you get home. Nothing is worse than forced sex when you’re exhausted.
4. What if he or she is into something that I am not? The key word here is COMPROMISE. Your partner is not your clone! Your mate is a separate entity with separate values and views than you, accept it if you really care for this person. Find a way where both of you can be pleased sexually and remember, judgment does more harm than good.
5. What if the sex isn’t good? Coach your partner into pleasing you without making them feel inadequate or lacking skill. If your partner isn’t open to pleasing you sexually or at least learning how to, further intervention will most likely be needed to 2. Sort Feelings First. It’s always wise to know how you feel about your continue the relationship. Sex is NOT everything but it IS partner first before sex. For most new couples sex is mostly something. emotional so please be sure that you are totally into your partner before taking this next step. If you have to think 6. Learn Together. about your feelings for your partner, then it’s wise that you You and your new love should look into sexual do not engage in sex until you have completely sorted out health classes and community health events even if your sex your feelings for them. together is good. It is never too late to stop learning. There is so much to learn about the human body and how you can 3. Know Your Partner: PAST, PRESENT & FUTURE. please your partner. Check out videos, blog sites, get Know the present state of your relationship. Know screened for STD’s together, and even start by reading this each others sexual past. Know the future of your sexual article. There is always room for knowledge. relationship with this person. The past is over and cannot be changed; the present will soon be over so the future is Enjoy your initial sexual encounters with your new partner golden. Know what your partner likes sexually without judgment and vice versa. You should also know where you while being safe and smart during this season of love. guys would like to take your relationship sexually. For example, are you both open to novelties, toys, videos, erotic literature, or even exploring sex with other couples? Knowledge without judgment is key to avoiding embarrassment and infidelity. Know the person you share your body parts with.
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Be Inspired
L
Darrin L. Harris
The Four Letter Word
OVE is our highest endeavor. Our lives are evaluated by how much or how little we love. Our quality of life and even the number of our days are affected by love. In fact, it is only to the extent that we love well and deeply that we truly come alive. Do you remember a time when you experienced
authentic love, real love? The chances are, all of us have a least one experience of love embedded deeply within the corridors of our mind. The reason for this is because whether intentional or unintentional we have assign landmark status to the times we have experienced love. We vividly recall these people and events throughout our lives. We also use these times as reference points and standards to compare our present relationships and sometimes this method could present dangers and prevent us from moving forward. The converse is also true: we never forget the pain of love lost, love gone bad, or the absence of love. For some learning to love others authentically, and in ways that matters to them, is one of the best things that a person can do. Loving people will not only be beneficial and rewarding to others, but your life will also be transformed. No matter what the outcome, most people don’t regret the time and effort they spent in loving. However, many people do regret the time they avoid learning to love. You don’t want to look back over your life and realize that you have missed out on love. I suggest that you become busy today in loving people so you can be able to reflect on how meaningful and meaning-filled your life has been because of your willingness and commitment to love.
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